sometimes i think about how edward elric literally doesn’t kill anyone and how that makes him stand a chance against other fictional protagonists because it isn’t the obligatory shonen ‘i must not kill’ it’s this literal, i played god with my mom’s remains and my brother most of all paid for it and it is my fault, i led this risk because i thought i could do it too and it ruined our lives. and just -- we’ve seen from 03 while it isn’t canon, ed seamlessly can just deconstruct people or find what makes them tic in less than five minutes not with brawn, but with brain. his intellect is off the freaking charts. so if someone had all this brawn / major power / major ability / magic etc.
so, how would ed remotely win?
it’s really simple. he just has to find out what makes up their body, and this is if ed literally was the killing kind aka he had no qualms killing his enemies, deconstruct their dna by rewriting it like he did greed with his carbon making him infinitely weaker in their fight. so in a way it’s terrifying to imagine edward reaching this point where he drops his pacifistic gloves albeit in a very aggressive way and goes that route in order to keep moving forward. it’s not in him to do it. but he could. he could rewrite and erase someone from the inside out with brain, genius, and alchemy, and it wouldn’t even take ten minutes.
instead we have this cheery, snarky, hot-tempered, too old for his years kid who firmly adheres to not taking life because he knows what it means to tamper with it and what that costs.
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One of the most memorable interactions was Saturday. Into our booth strolls a small family, tempted by free samples of freshly brewed tea. We chatter and give them the spiel, that the tea is character merch and we’re a cozy health-based app called Forage Friends.
The young girl zeroes in on our pride pins.
“They have my pin!” She says excitedly. “They have my flag!”
The dad blinks. He is surprised, but also calm and positive when he sees it’s the lesbian flag. “Oh. That’s… different from what you told me.”
“That was months ago, dad.” And she rolls her eyes. Definitely a teenager.
I turn to him and say, “Yeah, dad.” And we share a little laugh about it.
He says, “No, it’s great. That’s amazing, honey. It was just news to me.”
“Well, I guess I just decided to stop lying to myself. About liking guys. Like right now.”
A little lesbian just came out to her dad and he was super cool about it.
I’m standing there in my tie-dye mask and my cheery blue apron pouring tea and making small talk and I’m trying really hard not to cry or compare it to my experience, the fire & brimstone, the disgust, the conditional acceptance as long as I never bring it up.
So as this beautiful bonding is going on, the girl’s even younger brother turns his gaze around. He’s in a snorlax hoodie and bored and wants to go look at the swords across the hall. But on the other side of our booth….
“WHY DO PEOPLE DRAW THAT?” He asks loudly, and we all turn to our neighboring booth.
Our neighbors were extremely lovely people. Every time we had a break we would talk, and we became good friends over the weekend. They kept apologizing that their booth was next to ours and we kept repeating that it was totally fine. Their booth was great. I even bought their merchandise.
The thing that was so contentious, that they felt the need to apologize for, was that they were selling explicit titty hentai stickers of popular characters. They were censored with little yellow R18 labels but the content was very clear.
So back to the family: I freeze and immediately go somewhere else to let dad handle this question. With adult customers I’ve been loud and positive about our neighbors. (“Man, how has it been boothing next to them?” It’s been great! They bring a lot of foot traffic and they’re kind and wonderful professional neighbors. If anything it’s a fun juxtaposition. We believe in artistic freedom. I bought a sticker too!)
But this is a kid, it’s not my place to explain anything…. But I was extremely curious about what this chill dad would say.
“Well,” dad says with a long measured silence between each word. “Sometimes people are horny.”
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finally a descriptor for whatever the fuck american animation studios have been doing for years
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Wyll being a terrible monster hunter is something that is so special actually. told to hunt heartless devil? immediately convinced of her goodness and humanity and without hesitation agrees to defy the devil who has his soul in custody and spare karlach at tremendous personal physical cost. vampire in camp? well hes handsome and funny and pretty polite about where he puts his teeth so it’s fine all things considered. finding out the person who ritualistically disemboweled a tiefling in front of him is a bhaalspawn like an unholy progeny of the god of murder that is culturally immediately reviled? no that’s his friend and he completely trusts in their ability to fight their nature with their own inner light. it doesn’t matter that they created the absolute they’re not that person anymore. Like Wyll. you are literally categorically not hunting the monsters. guy of all time
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