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veeva-i0i · 7 months

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Good News everyone! I actually started on that Sam and Gabriel Soulmate fic that has been living in my mind rent-free. It will at least include the following (which I am totally NOT normal about);

Sam dating Jess, truly and deeply loving her despite them not being soulmates. He carries an immense guilt about her death, knowing that it was his fault that someone else would never get to meet and love their soulmate;

Sam knowing that somewhere out there, he does have a soulmate. People without soulmates don't have any dreams. His soulmate never showing up, meant that somehow they were hiding. And really, the older Sam got the more he started to understand why. He wouldn't want to be his own soulmate either.

Their shared dreamscape consisting of different rooms, for years it was only Sam's rooms that were visible to him (including a fast forest, an English literature classroom (later turned into a college classroom), and a library). The dreamscape changes once he meets the cute janitor while on a case, new rooms seemingly appearing out of nowhere. It lights a spark of hope in Sam, but it doesn't quite connect all the dots in his mind.

Mystery spot puts some more dominoes in place, it gives some more hints as to why Sam feels these tugs of attraction and want towards the trickster, despite the whole 'killing your brother over and over again', though the push to tumble those dominoes doesn't come quite yet.

After Mystery spot, the fic will follow a different timeline, one where they discover who Gabe is quicker. Dean will absolutely tear Gabriel a new one for keeping his brother in the dark about their soulmate bond.

Gabriel leaving behind one of his wing-feathers after that confrontation, a small bit of grace clinging onto it that put Sam at ease.

Sam getting said feather tattooed on his forearm (because I go absolutely FERAL for tattooed Sam) the first time Gabriel fakes his death to save the brothers. He stops showing up in their shared dreams and the feather loses its grace. Sam can only assume the worst.

Let's be real, Gabriel is still alive. The man is just doing what he's best at; running away from his problems. He's terrified of the idea of having a soulmate, of them being a hunter. Angels mate for life and he wasn't ready for the commitment, so he ran instead.

And there's just so much more going around in my brain for this fic. I just can't be normal about THEM.

#Supernatural #SPN #Sabriel #Gabriel #Sam #sam winchester #I am so (not) normal about them #fic ideas #this is not even half of the ideas that are running wild in my mind #Like #so many possiblities #Will sam have a wing kink? will he go feral about Gabe his death and try to bring him back like he did with Dean?#Dean getting to be the protective bitch he is while also ignoring the possibilities of finding his own soulmate #because deep down he's just as scared of the commitment as Gabe is #Head empty #Just Sebriel ROT

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luci-in-trenchcoats · 4 years

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Dazed and Confused (Part 1)

Summary: Dean Winchester grew up wanting to be a cop. When he gets kicked out of the police academy on a fluke though, he turns to a life of crime. After breaking up with Dean and seeing him committing a crime in the act, the reader becomes an officer herself and eventually a detective. Four years after that day, the reader is sent undercover to figure out what Dean is up to. Only she has no idea how far Dean is willing to go to keep her from finding out the truth…

Pairing: AU!Dean x reader

Masterlist

Word Count: 1,600ish

Warnings: language, scary situations, violence, murder, etc.

A/N: This series has been on Ao3 only for awhile now and I am finally reposting here as well. It’s not new but it may be new to you. Please enjoy!...

_____

“Dean?” you asked, spotting him walk in the front door and cut through to the back of the apartment. “Dean what...you’re supposed to be at the academy, aren’t you? You got class until-”

“I flunked out,” said Dean, your scoff stopping him in his tracks. “You think I’m fucking joking about that?”

“Considering you’re top of your class, yeah, I think you’re playing some shitty prank or ditching class. Now what is-”

“I have a record apparently. I can’t be a police officer now,” said Dean, grabbing his gym bag from the floor and moving to the closet. “I was seventeen and in a car I didn’t know someone took form their dad without permission. They charged all of us for a stupid non-crime and if I ever see Gabe again, I’m gonna murder him.”

‘Dean...” you said, grabbing his arm, spinning him around. “Go back to the academy and explain-”

“I was forced to quit, Y/N. I got called out of class and into the dean’s office. If you have a record, you can’t be a cop. They thought I was hiding it but I didn’t even know I had one. No exceptions they said. My bag’s are in Baby” he said, shrugging you off. “I’m staying with Sam tonight.”

“Dean, baby, it’s gonna be okay. Maybe we can call your dad, he’s a detective. He knows-”

“Stop trying to make me feel better for once in my life!” he shouted, brushing past you and for the door. “Y/N, give me some space. I mean it.”

“We are talking about this once you cool off Dean. Until then you can have your space.”

Two Months Later

"What?” you asked quietly, too caught up at staring at the green eyes under the mask to think about the gun in his hands. His own were wide and he was quickly shoving you on the ground, standing over you.

“Say another word and I’ll kill you, understand?” he growled, not waiting for an answer before barking out other orders to people inside the bank.

You hadn’t seen or heard from Dean in almost two months. You gave him his day to vent and get it out that he wasn’t going to be a cop, that everything he’d worked for in school and college and the academy was all gone.

When he finally came back around with a couple of moving boxes, he went off on you. You knew Dean’s head and knew that he didn’t mean what he said during a fight. Normally it was his way of getting you to back off. Nearly four years together and two with living together gave you a pretty good idea of when he was being mean for no reason.

But when he, the one guy you ever willingly told about the awful day...when he said it was your fault, you knew it was done. If he was so angry and bitter about not being a cop that he would rip open wounds that only got shut because of him, he wasn’t the man you thought he was.

Two months later seeing green eyes that looked so much like his, hearing a voice that was just a bit deeper than you were used to...you were almost positive the man in the ski mask and holding a gun at some poor bank teller was Dean Winchester.

He wasn’t there more than a minute, gone in a flash and barely enough time for you to register the build under the baggy hoodie and coat.

“Hi, Sam,” you said, dialing him up as soon as you gave a statement to a cop. “You heard from your brother lately?”

“Uh no. He and I aren’t exactly talking right now,” said Sam, his voice hard. “I haven’t seen him in two months.”

“I think...” you said, walking away from the bank and climbing in your car. “I think your brother just robbed a fucking bank, Sam.”

“That’s not funny, Y/N,” said Sam.

“Neither was getting shoved around by a bank robber, Sam. I am 99% positive that it was Dean,” you said.

“Dean was pissed last time I saw him but he’s not a criminal, Y/N,” said Sam.

“I didn’t...I’m worried about the asshole, alright?” you said, Sam breathing heavy on the other end. “Oh, you think he’s an asshole too, Sammy.”

“What’d he say to you?” asked Sam.

“Shit I don’t want to talk about. I’m guessing he said crap about your mom?” you asked, Sam’s thick swallow coming through loud and clear. “He got kicked out of the academy and he lost his shit, which I get but Sam you know your mom was not your fault.”

“I know but he just had to...maybe he really did rob a bank,” said Sam, his floor creaking in the background. “I know, Kevin...I’ll run to study group in just a minute, okay?”

“Shit, it’s your finals week, isn’t it,” you said, running your hand over your face. “You don’t need this right now.”

“It’s alright, Y/N,” said Sam. “Swing by the house around eight. We can talk then.”

“No, you study, Sam. I’m sure I’m overreacting is all.”

Four Years Later

“Junior Detective Y/L/N,” said your partner, a hard ass with a nought soft center.

“Bobby,” you said with a smile up at him, his face in even more of a scowl than usual. “It’s not even nine in the morning. What’s shoved up-”

“You’ve been reassigned, kid,” said Bobby, your jaw dropping. “You think I want another snot nosed brat to train? Uh uh.”

“Where are they putting me?” you asked, getting up from your desk, following him down the hall to the conference room. “I didn’t put in for anything. I actually like being your partner. Bobby, I-”

“Special assignment is all chief would tell me,” said Bobby.

“Y/N,” said the chief, waving you inside, holding up a hand for Bobby to wait outside.

“John, what in the world could you be putting her on that I can’t know about it?” asked Bobby.

“It’s need to know and you know what you need to,” said John, closing the door in his face. He pointed you to a seat, pulling down the blinds in the room. “You’re fidgeting, Y/L/N.”

“What’s going on that the most senior detective in the department can’t know about it?” you asked.

“You’re the only person here who can do what I’m about to ask you,” said John, sliding over the lone file at the other end of the table. “I need you to keep this quiet. You’ll understand-”

“Dean,” you said, his face staring back when you opened the file. There was no arrest record apart from one when he was 17 but the things he was suspect in...

“Dean is...let’s just call it in deep shit and leave it at that,” said John, taking a seat beside you. “He’s dangerous. Never been convicted of anything. I’ve kept the rumors of what he does away from the department but...Dean’s made a name for himself elsewhere. Everything from petty theft to kidnapping, assualt...murder suspect.”

“John, why are you showing me this?” you asked, sliding the file away, not caring to see what happened to the man you once loved.

“I need you to go undercover,” said John, your head shaking. “You just had your secondary training a month ago and they said you’re one of the best they’ve seen. We both know you became a cop to figure out what the hell happened to him. This is our chance.”

“I became a cop so I wouldn’t feel scared again like in that bank,” you said, turning away. “In case you forget, your son broke up with me. He said things to me that I can’t forgive. He would never in a million years buy that I forgot all that.”

“I’m not asking you go undercover as his girlfriend, Y/N. He’s a criminal. He’s in Washington, a small town, working something. We just need intel on what it is, that’s it,” said John.

“He knows me. He probably knows I’m a cop. I can’t just go undercover,” you said.

“So what if he knows you’re a cop? Tell him you quit if he asks,” said John.

“John...” you said, leaning back in your seat. “I can’t do it.”

“We don’t have a choice, Y/N. The feds said you’re the one. You pack up tonight.”

A week later you were in your new town with a population of two thousand people. You were barely there thirty seconds before half the people were bringing over plates of food. It didn’t take long for word to spread a new girl was around or for you to spot Dean after that.

“Leave,” he said as he walked past you on the street, not bothering to stop.

“Dean,” you said, jogging back to catch up with him, catching his arm halfway down the block. “What-”

“If I see you again, you won’t like what happens next,” he said, shrugging you off.

About eight hours later, you realized you never really knew Dean Winchester at all.

_____

A/N: Read Part 2 here!

#supernatural #spn #dean x reader #dean winchester #au #spn fanfiction #supernatural fanfiction #series

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keptinqueer · 4 years

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Future fic where

Lucas and Max get married, and Billy's the one to walk her down the aisle (think I've read something like that). Billy's mellowed with age, and as he escorts Max up to the alter, he kisses her on the cheek and turns to Lucas, and Lucas thinks he's about to give the paternal "if you ever hurt her" speech, but. Billy instead tells him that he knows he and Lucas started off pretty badly, but since everything that transpired since (probably after many a milkshake for Max and Lucas both on Billy's "Be Less Shitty" campaign), he's so happy to see them getting married. And he adds, "Don't worry, not gonna give ya the "if you hurt my daughter" speech; 'cause if you hurt her, Max is gonna kick your ass." I mean, this is Max "Dump His Ass" Mayfield we're talking about.

And when Max and Lucas have kids, their kids would definitely be Mayfield-Sinclair and complain to their parents constantly how much of a mouthful it is (they have a daughter that they've named Abigail Suzanne Mayfield-Sinclair, and one day she goes "mooooon, why couldn't I just be a Sinclair", and Max is like, "You wanna be A.S.S.? Fine, be A.S.S." Abigail rethinks that name change real quick).

@queermermaids : "Billy's visiting when this happens and just busts out laughing, tries to stop and fails when his niece gives him a glare."

And, Billy doesn't want kids of his own but loves Max and Lucas's kids so fucking much. He never went all heart-eyes over babies till Max had a kid, but within a month he was wanting to hold the baby all the damn time. He'd do dumb shit like instead of a choo-choo train or aeroplane spoon to get the kid to eat, he'd do "motorcycle spoon". Vroom vrooms the food into the baby's mouth. Steve is watching all of this and it just makes him fall in love with Billy even more. And maybe he, somewhere deep down, always wanted kids at some point, but he knew Billy didn't and if that was the dealbreaker he'd choose Billy always. But, it makes his heart hurt a little bit, seeing Billy so good with the kids.

And as they get older and more stable, late 30s early 40s, Steve asks Billy to reconsider having kids. And it's either a big fight or a big cry for them both, but Billy is certain he doesn't want biological children, and Steve suggests maybe adopting. Billy's not really sure, so they decide to see if they might make good foster parents, as that’s still a responsibility but can be a smaller time commitment, like foster a kid who is soon to turn 18 and be independent. And of course, they get a kid who's just like Billy was at that age. Angry at the world, bad at communicating, a kid who wasn’t given the love he deserved. Billy and the kid - Gabriel - butt heads at first. But Steve sits down with Gabe, and explains how Billy had a really awful dad too, and he’s probably scared he’ll be a shitty dad just like Neil. Steve talks to Billy privately as well, about controlling his temper and being a better role model for Gabe, because he's gotten a lot better with anger over the years but it's still something he's constantly working on.

And then one day, the kid's father shows up - tries to come get him even though Gabe’s case worker has filed for a restraining order. Things escalate, it gets dangerous, and Billy does everything in his power to both protect his foster child and keep Gabe’s bio dad away from him, like physically blocking him from getting to Gabe. Probably gets punched in the process. It’s hours later when Gabe’s father has been arrested for assault and Billy’s given his statement that Steve is tending to his wounds in the bathroom, gently dabbing at his split lip. Gabe walks in, looking a lot smaller than he usually presents himself, and he thanks Billy. But Billy just gives him a small smiles and tells him there’s no need. “You’re my kid,” he tells Gabe, “And it’s my job to protect you.”

After that, something just... clicks. It's tentative at first, but they’re both more open with each other after the incident. Gabe starts hanging out with Billy while Billy works on his car, handing him tools, while Billy sneaks in lessons on car things. How to change a tire, what to keep in his car for emergencies (months later, after the kid drives off after a fight with Billy and his tire gets busted - he panics, because shit he never put a spare tire in the trunk, but he goes to look in the trunk for a flashlight or something because it's dark and raining and sees that - there's a tire there. That Billy put. And along with it everything he needs to change a tire. And realizes he knows how, because Billy's been sneaking in those lessons).

Anyway, it all ends happy of course. They have these big movie moments of Billy and Steve being there for the kid's prom, his graduation, his uni admissions. Driving him off to dorm there and asking if he's sure if he wants to dorm as they're already unloading stuff for his room from the car.

Gabe turns 18 his senior year of high school, but Steve and Billy go on to adopt him, anyway. He’s their kid, after all. They just had to make it official.

This is who I saw Gabe as in my mind’s eye, btw.

#mine #gabriel #gabe #harringrove #dads!harringrove #billy hargrove #steve harrington

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dilfbatman · 4 years

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Do u have ny angsty headcanons aboht aby character

first of all i relate heavy to the way this was worded, you’re so valid bro and secondly, lemme think of some! this is my first time doing angst so please bare with me! (this one is very long and you have my utmost admiration and thanks if you read it fully (if it’s too long and you can’t just know you’re so valid and i still love and wanna thank you) and to whoever requested this, thank you bc it made me really feel something and made me appreciate these characters even more!)

—

- percy will personally never in his life touch alcohol and he won’t dabble in drugs, he knows firsthand the vile effects of it and wants to be in control of his faculties. let it be known he will legitimately murder any abuser in sight, on sight.

- leo and percy often talk about their terrible home lives and percy gets really upset when leo mentions his foster homes and how he’s ran away multiple times, he talks about how much he misses his mother. he feels like it’s his fault and percy won’t hear any more of it, he’ll hold leo close & tight and let him cry into his shoulder and percy will also cry while leaving kisses on leo’s head and running his fingers softly through leo’s hair bc they’ve gone through so much hurt and pain and it’s unfair. percy in a silent pang of guilt is so grateful for his mother and that she’s safe and alive and just wished that the same could be said for leo’s mother. he wishes that gabe never existed and that their mother’s weren’t thrown into the bs they have to be thrust into just by virtue of being a demigod. he wants the gods and goddesses and monsters to just leave them alone and let them just find peace and rest

- piper talks to leo about her life and how she just wishes it was all normal and that they didn’t have to have such difficult lives, and how she just wanted everyone to be safe and leo just has his arm around her shoulders and lets her know that she isn’t alone in that feeling and they have a new found family and that’s what matters

- nico will sometimes just shut down in his bed and feel numb and realize that there’s water coming out of his eyes and he’s realizing he’s crying and is confused. he really misses bianca and just thinks about how she reincarnated and he shadowtravels the world trying to find her, but to no avail. there’s a sense of bitterness and betrayal in him but that quickly fades bc she was just a child that had to be a mother to him, and he starts feeling guilty and sobs uncontrollably bc he misses her and just wants her back and wants to hug and hold her again. hazel comes in bc she senses nico’s upset and just holds him so tight and whispers softly and sweetly that it will all be okay, that she’s there for him, that she’s his sister too and she loves him and she knows that nico loves her too

- he’s also never sleeping due to his nightmares of tartarus and he decides for a while just to not go to bed and stay awake, and around camp he might have a sense of dread and power roll off of him into waves that the campers feel and the hairs stand up on the back of their necks - jason & will notice this and quietly take him into the hades cabin and just sit quietly with him in his bed. eventually, nico dozes off and his hands are held both by jason & will - there’s an unspoken but understood communication between the both of them

- frank also always is missing his mother, he’s never not thinking about her and he has identity crises about how he can be the son of mars while he feels a strong connection to apollo and why did his mother fall in love with mars? his burning stick also is always looming in the back of his mind and still gets nightmares about it which he wakes up in the middle of the night from, in a cold sweat. fellow ares campers know that feeling and clarisse tells frank to come with her and they both sit down at the lake and talk about all the issues and heartache that comes from being the child of the god of war. clarisse lets him know the other kids know what it’s like, and she & they are always here for him, they’re always there for their own. frank starts to cry and clarisse holds him quietly knowing this is what he needs

- will is the resident doctor and while he’s saved countless lives, he’s lost a few too. they were his friends, his comrades, his brothers and sisters and some days it just eats him up - he feels guilt settle so deeply that he just goes outside bc he feels a sense of claustrophobia. piper & nico see him and sense this and they hold him up and take him to an open field that the demeter children have that is full of green grass, strawberry patches, and is filled with sunshine. they sit him down and will rests his head in nico’s lap while his legs are on piper’s and he just lets out everything he’s feeling while they both quietly listen and he talks until he can’t anymore bc he’s about to break down. nico kisses him very softly and let’s him know that everyone he’s saved is good and well because of him and those who were lost were granted elysium and are eternally grateful to will. nico said he’d even take will to the underworld to show him and make him realize the difference and good will has done in the world - the entire time piper is holding will’s hand and uses her charmspeak to calm him down in a way she knows will needs

- sometimes jason and annabeth just sit in the zeus cabin talking to each other about anything and everything. annabeth quietly speaks about tartarus with jason whenever she doesn’t want to talk to percy about it, because she knows it’ll bring him into a spiral as well and she doesn’t want to do that. jason feels a pit in his stomach as deep as tartarus bc how could she have survived? he knows how much will power she has, how capable, intelligent, strong she is but he can’t help feeling unbelievably frightened for her bc she’s not a child of the big three. big three kids are powerful and look at the wreck percy & nico feel - and while she is too, there’s just so much fear in her eyes and her voice falters and jason just holds her. she just sobs into his shoulder and he just holds her so tight in a silent gesture of “i’m here for you.” he rubs her back, let’s her get everything out, she doesn’t have to put on a strong facade and simply lets all her fears and worries out into the open air. jason hears her out, gives out advice and wisdom right at the perfect times, and he reiterates that he’s always here for her. the genuine thankfulness in her eyes is something he holds dearly

- jason will talk about how heartbroken he is that his memories were wiped. his own life feels like a game that’s being played by the gods and all the other demigods can relate to that notion, and percy hears him out and has jason lay his head on percy’s lap and just talk about the hurt. percy knows what it’s like, while it may be on a smaller scale, he can attest to the sadness and confusion jason feels and agrees w everything he says. sometimes jason just goes quiet and forgets to talk, and percy has to run his fingers through jason’s hair to let him know that he’s here, he’s alive, he’s making new memories and that he’s here for him.

- something reyna and jason have in common is the fact that both their parents descended into madness. they talk in hushed voices and tears softly fall down both their faces, they are both holding each other’s hands to make sure they’re tethered to this earth and that they’re here for each other bc they know what the other person is going through. reyna told nico this and she tells jason this too, and she speaks about how she’s afraid bc committing patricide is one of the biggest sins in the roman camp, and she’s afraid of what that means for her fate. jason tells her that pluto will be kind to her, he reminds her that nico & hazel have both talked to their father to guarantee elysium for them all, and while she appreciates that there’s always that sense of what if she doesn’t? jason eases her worries and tells her it will all be okay and reyna nods and looks into his eyes and makes sure that jason knows that it will all be okay for him too

- percy will sometimes just be alone in the poseidon cabin and will start uncontrollably sobbing. he furiously thinks to himself that if he’s a son of poseidon can’t he control his tears? to make them not fall? he thinks of how much he misses bob and constantly tells the stars that he says hello & he’s made a promise to himself that he would get him out of there one way or another. then he spirals about tartarus and how frightened and powerful he felt when choking the goddess of misery. he goes numb for a bit and then forces himself to think about the goodness in his life and the friends he has and the mother he so dearly loves and like a gift from above he sees tyson comes in and tyson is wondering why his big brother is crying? tyson tells percy to please not cry and holds him so tight and tyson’s eye is filling up w tears and his voice is wobbly and percy holds tyson’s face and tells him that him & tyson are going to be alright and that he loves him so dearly and he’s so thankful for him. tyson has the biggest smile on his face and percy just wants to protect him and he just hugs him so tight, trying to convey his love, admiration, and adoration for his lil baby brother

- leo and hazel will just sit together near the forest and hazel puts her head on his shoulders speaking about how much she wishes she had a normal childhood, how both her & leo were forced to make sacrifices for the greater good, and how the people she loved were hurt by her powers. leo stays quiet for a bit and tells her that they’re both the same and that their bond and friendship is strong because of that. hazel holds his hand so tightly bc she knows they’re both scared but they’re both alive and they’re here against all odds, and that’s what matters

- i know nearly all demigods deal with not only survivor’s guilt, but they had to deal with the loss of friends/loved ones, they’ve had to deal with horrific family situations and they’ve had to be thrust into war - it takes a physical, emotional, and mental toll and i just want them all to go to therapy, get necessary medication, and have people tell them that they love them

here you go anon! i had to bust out my sad songs in my playlist for this and if i’m honest, this made me love & appreciate these characters even more and i didn’t think that was possible. i love you and hope you enjoy this! also the way you wrote the message still is making me giggle you absolute icon - thank you if you take the time to read this, i know it’s way too long but this one really made me feel something <3

#sorry for how long this is i just really got into it #if it depresses you please forgive me #it made me love these characters more and i just want to hug them #percy jackson #percy jackson headcanons #if this is too long to read just know that’s so valid and i’m sorry <3 #this is something i have never done before and wow what a request!!! made me feel things #also i know the people they talk to may not be some people’s first choice and idk why i chose it like this it just seemed kinda natural #if anyone reads this i just hope you enjoy :’)#percy jackson asks #asks

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olllmaatta · 6 years

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Prompt- Gabe/Tyson, Tyson being his usually dorky self

uselessly gay tyson barrie? the biggest mood also god bless avs social media also this might??? be a bit angsty actually i was thinking of the karaoke video when i started this but then it took on a life of its own

tyson knows it’s a mistake before he opens his mouth, but that seems to be happening to him more and more often now anyways, especially if he’s in front of a camera. it doesn’t help that gabe’s ignoring his directions to make faces at him and laugh at all the dumb things he’s been saying through this media session.

(it doesn’t help that it makes things feel almost normal, like they’re tyson-and-gabe again after the off-season and everything that happened - before. tyson knows that gabe’s been seeking reconciliation, and it would be all too easy to give it to him, to pretend that nothing had ever happened and let them go back to the way they were. but he can’t do that, not when he had already spilled his heart to gabe way back - when, not when nothing in him has changed.)

he’s not lying when he says he likes to sing celine dion. it’s a very canadian answer, he knows, and internet people are probably going to go wild, but it’s the truth. and then lauren asks him to actually sing, and - well - he can’t say no to her.

to anyone, apparently.

suddenly he doesn’t know a single song, though, and he almost panics for a second until he remembers one. but when the words finally click -

it’s too late.

“touch me like this - it’s a beautiful song, though - hold me like that-” and gabe’s right behind the camera, now, so tyson literally can’t avoid looking at him, and - it’s too much, suddenly. the song, and gabe trying to just be friends again, and all the emotions of coming back and trying to start anew - it’s too much.

lauren knows him, though - well enough to let him go after this one. stammering out an apology to the intern who’s supposed to be directing them through the media day stations, he runs to the nearest bathroom. it’s empty, thankfully, so he can just lean on a sink and take a few big, deep breaths.

“tyson?” he hears. oh, god, please, no-

“gabe! what’s up, my dude? my man? how are you? how have you been?” and there he goes again, his motor-mouth never shutting up, and-

gabe looks like he’s just going to respond with some platitude, something like “oh yeah, it was fine, saw my family,” but the moment he meets tyson’s eyes (he’s not crying, but he almost wishes he was), his entire demeanour changes. “i made a mistake,” he says instead.

“yeah, you did,” tyson says, and it’s more bitter than he intended. “i - do you - do you know-”

“i’m sorry, tys,” gabe says, and to his credit he really does look - despondent, almost, and tyson can’t believe his eyes. he didn’t expect - the last thing he expected was an actual apology, let alone gabe looking like this. “can we-”

“-be friends?” tyson finishes. his mind is screaming at him to say yes before he ruins this any more, but as usual, his mouth has a mind of his own. “no, gabriel, we can’t be friends. we can’t just go back to the way things were before. that’s - i - i loved you, and you just-”

“…loved?” gabe says, and his voice is so small. “tyson, do you - i didn’t mean - do you not love me anymore?”

and, okay, this is not where tyson thought this was going, and he knows he really needs to stop talking. but he can’t. “oh my god, you’re so dumb, of course i still love you, how can i not? but i know that you don’t love me back, so, like, it’s okay. but just - let me be. i can’t - i can’t do this, not again. can’t get close to you.”

“tyson, i-” and gabe steps closer, and tyson involuntarily takes a step back. the look on gabe’s face when he does that, though, makes him curse himself after doing so. “i fucked up. i was scared of commitment, and i pushed you away, and i don’t want to be just friends, and - i just. can we, maybe…”

he lets his voice trail off, and this is what really hits tyson - gabriel landeskog should never be at a loss for words, never hesitant, never insecure, and-

he should never think that tyson doesn’t loves him. because holy shit, tyson does, and as much as he wanted to stop he can’t. the moment he saw gabe after they got back to denver, he wanted to run into his arms. he still wants everything he wanted in march, wants to settle down and wake up to gabe on the other side of the bed, wants to walk zoey every afternoon and make up stories about their neighbours, wants gabe in every part of his life.

so he says yes.

and gabe’s face lights up, like the sun coming out, and it’s still the most beautiful thing that tyson’s ever seen. “i’m so sorry, tys, i - thank you, i swear, i love you so much, i’m sorry i got scared-”

tyson kisses him to shut him up.

#the kestrel speaks #rpf for ts #gabetys #sinisterbisexual #kestrel writes fic #uHHH honestly i'm not??? sure how i feel about this #i took the song and fuckin ran with it #should i ??? post this to ao3????#maybe

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shuttercaelan · 7 years

Text

The Talk 5/30

Who: Caelan Smythe & @gabrielanderson

Where: Gabe’s room

When: May 30, 2017

What: They discuss the next steps and leanr more about the other.

Gabe was nervous and had been since he got the text from Caelan. Knowing what he wanted to talk about, it made him even more so. It wasn't that he didn't want to have sex with him he just didn't want to rush it, or have it be disappointing. Gabe watched some TV for a while and paced some and then was sitting in his chair looking at his phone he texted Blaine and waited.

Caelan had had a decent time with Kurt but now it was time to see Gabe. Dressed in his fitted flannel with a white tank under, fitted jeans, his glasses and messy tossed hair, he knew it would only make things more fun as he knocked. Caelan was nervous for this too but he knew it was something he wanted and wanted with Gabe.

Gabe jumped at the knock at his door. He was barefoot and just in his jeans and black tank top. He crossed his room quickly and opened it fast. He smiled at Caelan and motioned for him to come inside. "Come in."

Caelan smiled, kissing him as he walked into the room. He had to keep himself calm as he walked in and sat on the couch. His heart and head were racing over and over again. He didn't know how this was going to go but he had to do it. "So...where should we start?" Smiling to Gabe softly.

Gabe leaned up and in to Cael and kissed him back. He took a deep breath as he turned and followed him and sat next to him on the couch. He ran his hand through his hair a few times, not sure were to start either. "I, well... we need to talk this out. I'ts nothing to jump into you know?"

Caelan chuckled some, he could really see how nervous he was now. "Are you nervous? baby, you're so cute." He couldn't help how he was acting. It was rather adorable. "Gabe, I'm not looking to do it tonight or even this week, I want it to be natural."

Gabe looked at him with nervous eyes and he blushed slightly. "I... yeah I suppose I am. I can't help it." He reached and took Cael's hand, lacing his fingers with his own. "I know, I mean I figured you didn't mean that, but just talking about it... I don't know why it's got me so nervous. I want it to be natural for us too."

Caelan moved then, still holding his hand to sit on his lap. He looked into his eyes, forcing Gabe to look at him as he sat there. "Maybe because for the first time ever, its not just about sex...its about more?" his fingers sliding through Gabe's hair now. "I know you have things you want to ask, so ask them, baby. We need to talk more."

Gabe sits back as he suddenly has a lapful of Cael. He looked up at him, very much taking this seriously. "That could be it, because I know it's not. I know its more between the two of us." He leaned forward, making small sighing sound when he played with his hair. "I know and I want to talk, and know that we can talk about anything with each other." Gabe thought of what he'd been thinking, as well as what Blaine had told him. "I’ve always felt polyamourous and I still am, but right now, much as I spend time with others, the strongest feelings, the wanting to spend nights with, is mostly all you. And maybe that's what scares me. Not that I don't want to take that step with you because I do but just what that would mean, for us. I don't want you to regret it or for it to change what we have."

Caelan kept playing with Gabe's hair while he was talking. He could feel his own blush at the words that came. Once Gabe was done talking, Caelan knew it was his turn. "I won't regret it, since the moment I messaged you, I haven't regretted anything I've done with you. Anything I've said to you, I don't regret. Before all this, I lived in the shadow of my brother, everyone wanted him, everyone only saw him. Same with my father, he's the ambassador to France and so I've been seen as one way and with you, I'm just me. I'm not just his son or Sebastian's brother. I'm Caelan. As for poly....we have time, I just know I want this and I want to be with you."

Gabe found it hard to think when Caelan played with his hair but he didn't want him to stop either. He wrapped his arms around Cael's waist and watched him as he started to take his turn and talk. His eyes went wide when Cael mentioned his father; he knew Sebastian, Cael and Maddy had grown up in DC but that was huge. "I'm glad you don't feel like you're in their shadows. I like just Caelan. And I don't regret anything that's happened with you either. But you're sure? We haven't said I love you, or made a grand deep commitment....shouldn't we have all that first," he said, biting his bottom lip in worry, the nervous crossing his face as he looked at Caelan. He wasn't panicking just yet butcould't help the worry he felt.

Caelan shrugged to him. "I don't really know...I mean all my life it wasn't about love. My father wasn't about love, we had nannies. Love wasn't something I know. I just know how it feels to be with you and its a crazy feeling but I enjoy it. Its addictive and I've always dreamed of love and I want love...with you but at the same time, I don't know if I could wait that long to do something with you like having sex. I know I trust you and I know I'm safe with you, thats all that matters to me."

Gabe tipped his head up, kissing Caelan's jaw to the corner of his mouth and finally on his mouth. "That's a shame, for you all, you deserve love Caelan, deserve to BE loved. I don't know what this is between us or even if we have words for it yet, but I know how I feel with you. I trust you too, and want you to always feel safe with me too. If this is what you want then it'll happen with us okay? I don't think we can plan it, I'm just not that person, but when it feels right, I want that extra step with you."

Caelan smiled at the kiss, kissing him back with a smile. "I'd like that, just let it happen. I just wanted you to know I'm ready for it, I'm wanting it with you." Pressing another kiss to his lips, he finally pulled back some and nuzzled their noses together. "Okay so I think we should talk more too, talk about who we are because I want to know you better."

Gabe nodded and smiled. "I'm glad we both agree in that. And really am glad you let me know, it means a lot to me." Gabe kissed him back again and they nuzzled together. "I'm all for talking and I think getting to know each other better would be good too. What do you want to know?"

Caelan shrugged some. "Tell me about your parents, your family and your best childhood memory with all your siblings." His head coming to rest on Gabe's shoulder as he pressed light kisses to his neck and throat.

Gabe smiled at him. "Dad is a stock broker and and mom is a college professor. I'm the middle of us, and my best memory, probably us gathered around the piano jamming out. Blaine would be on the piano or we'd duet, or I would have my guitar. But there was also this park nearby that we would play at, all over the playground and rides. We used to love going there and spending hours together." He relaxed as they held each other and he stroked Cael's back, enjoying the kisses to his neck.

Caelan smiled some, humming at his touch. "I've never gotten to hear you play, you should play for me and I'll sing some for you." Opening one eye to look up to Gabe. "My father...well I told you about him, he used us as a tool to make it further in the world. Our mother, well we really don't know fully who she is since father had slaves and a submissive, though we're sure the submissive is our mother. My life I've spent jetsetting between France and Washington DC. Thus the fluent in french and my nanny was the one who gave me my first camera...never put one down since. Also, we could totally fool around in the dark room some time." Referring to their earlier conversation.

Gabe liked the sounds Caelan was making, it was comforting to him. "You weren't paying attention at prom?" he teased him. "But I'd be happy to play for you, and certainly wouldn't turn down you singing." He reached up, brushing hair out of Caelan's face. "That all sounds.... complicated and explains Sebastian and you a lot more too. It must've been crazy going back and forth though too." Gabe smiled. "I can't imagine you without your camera to be honest." And then he laughed. "Dark room fun times, how scandalous."

Caelan smiled. "I was slightly distracted with my date flirting with my twin." Poking Gabe's stomach with a smile. "And maybe I want you to sing to just me." Pressing a kiss to his cheek. "Yeah, it normally does. The last person I tried to explain myself too got all freaked out because I told him about all that and he thought it was too much but he asked about why I have such issues with Sebastian." Smiling more, Caelan laced their fingers together. "Hmm sounds like the best time to me."

Gabe frowned when he mentioned the flirting. "I know, I'm sorry baby, so sorry. And if you want me to just sing to you then I would love to do that." He kissed Cael's forehead and reached up to stroke his hair. "It is a lot to deal with yeah but it also explains a lot about you and Sebastian too. But I don't think it was too much either." Gabe smiled and laced their fingers together. "Mmhmmm I think it does too."

#13 #gabe

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