Attempt number 9278328717283 (this is me exaggerating)
So I woke up early today, so I thought, “why not meditate a bit ?”. I did breathing exercices and I did the Thomas Edison method again, and when the object I was holding fell from my hands, my entire body felt fuzzy ? So that’s how I know I was close to the hypnogogic state. I didn’t do much for a while, I just let it happen and when I felt like I was deep in it, I started imagining the void, how it would feel and everything, without affirming and I felt so many symptoms ! This isn’t the first time I’ve felt close (I’ve been on this journey for 3 years) but this is the first time in 5 months that I managed to enter the hypnogogic state 😭😭
My entire body was vibrating… for like 1-2 minutes ??? 😭😭 I kept on visualising and everything but i still I ‘woke up’. Why did it take so long seriously 😭😭?? I remember the last time I felt close, I also lingered in the hypnogogic state while affirming and I wondered why it wasn’t instant lol
When using a bread maker, sometimes they tell you this and sometimes they don’t, the order of the ingredients is what goes in first. And you want all your wet stuff in first before adding dry so you don’t have an unmixed product. It also helps not only having the ingredients but putting them in correctly. These last two days have definitely been an experience.
And once I realized how this process works my mind has been put at ease. My determination has been renewed. Plus all adhd/autism people should indulge in a breadmaker. Once it goes all you have to do is forget about it and it’ll shut itself off when it’s done. Then you can make your own stuff at home whenever and if your not hungry for it after waiting you can save it for later. And knowing you made it, put all the ingredients in yourself is comforting.
So yeah, on my attempt of 4th banana bread using the first recipe I tried. I’m cautiously optimistic this time.
Okay so today was absolutely insane ??? I already had a lucid dreams yesterday but nothing crazy had happened. Today I had sleep paralysis TWICE ??? Like I was awake, I could hear voices (my mom if anyone’s curious lol) but I was alone in the house 😭😭. It happened twice. So I manifested to enter the void both times but I think it didn’t work both times because I thought my mother ACTUALLY was in the house I was stressed because she had called my name 😭 so I couldn’t focus and relax.
This is the 2nd time something like this happened 🙃🙃.