I’ve been watching Brooklyn Nine-Nine recently and I had the idea of a detective/cop au with the sbg cast because it’d be funny.

Under the cut cuz I made it too long.

Basically, what I’m working with here is that Ashlyn’s either the sergeant or captain of the squad. I haven’t completely decided yet but I’m fine with either. Anyhow, Aiden’s kinda like Jake in B99 where he’s really smart and can solve a case no problem but has a tendency to joke around and not follow the rules entirely. He’s also really stubborn. I was thinking Tyler and Aiden could have the rivalry/bet that Amy and Jake had going on in s1 ‘cause it’d be funny to see them try and beat the other in most cases solved.

For Logan I was thinking he’d be the best on-field (cuz yk he’s good with a gun) and best shooter the precinct has. Taylor would be good at getting info from perps and she’d be an amazing “good cop” while Ashlyn would play “bad cop” or they could switch. I don’t think it matters. Ben would be real intimidating but he’s just a big softie. He’s like the nicest cop at the precinct and enjoys being a secondary rather than a primary (like he doesn’t want to take the lead role on cases a lotta the time cuz yk he can’t talk) but he’s still a very valuable person to the squad.

For whatever plot this au has I think it’d be cool to have it interlink with the phantoms and the phantom dimension in some way. Like maybe there are a series of murders where the killer maims/disfigures the victims’ bodies and the squad have to solve it, but it’s a difficult case because there are people trying to cover up the murders — like maybe the Cranes (or whatever their organisation is called) or something. Also, they could give the serial killer a name like “the phantom or smth” or you can still add the phantom dimension into the au if you want to but at its core this au is just about shits and giggles.

Like I want to see Aiden arrive at work and drink his third tea of the day — cuz he’s a tea guy — and I wanna see Ben sit at his desk and prolong his paper work because listening to music is so much better. I want to see Logan have tons of flowers at his desk because his grandparents were so happy he’d finally gotten the job he had worked for; Taylor fixing the printers everyday because Logan got kind of mad when the printer stops working. (He took a hammer and smashed it.) I wanna see Tyler come to work with more than one lunch bag because he decided to make the others lunch. I WANT TO SEE FLUFF. If you get what I mean.

I’d also like to clarify that im not trying to undermine anyone’s intelligence/skills in any way. They’re all skilled and perceptive and great detectives they just show it differently. Like Ben get intel by silently reading you whereas Tyler tries a more aggressive approach which contrasts with Taylor’s calculated questions and answers and Ashlyn’s perceptiveness to body language. Logan’s all about finding the facts first and building off of there, so he’s kind of in between everything when solving a case but the clue board is his go-to and Aiden just kinda fuck’s around and finds out.

I'll tell you what I want what I really really want

I wanna- (my adhd interrupts me with a new idea) I wanna- (my adhd interrupts me with a new idea) I wanna- (my adhd interrupts me with a new idea) I wanna- (my adhd interrupts me with a new idea)

Sephiroth but if he was desi... he is not beating the pretty boy allegations

"Desiroth" coined by my dearest bestie @nyatimesthree 🫶 thank you babes. anyway silly video I made and posted to instagram at 5am is under the cut

he estuans on my interius until i ira vehementi (sephiroth !!)

tattoo truth prequel lmao

Hardie boys: y’all seen those two cops. how long have they been there at the same spot. what are they doing. why are they just there literally staring at the wall. it’s been 3 days

There is a special pit in hell for people who are so fucking loud before 9:30 am, especially when they know other people are still sleeping.

Happy Monday

I’m 🙂 grateful 🙂 all 🙂 the 🙂 fucking 🙂 time 🙂

Its ok maybe if you look up the lyrics to was für ein grausames leben and read them in english you will be okj<3

family christmas part twoo </33

March 13 needs to stop being a date.

March 13th, 2023 was the day I came out to my friends IRL. And March 13th, 2024 will be the day I find out whether I have breast cancer or if it’s just cysts (I’m leaning toward cysts, but only imaging can determine that).

😭

FUCKING FINALLY!!!!!!!! it took 3 days of trial and error but i fiiiiiinally got my gotham video posted!!! enjoy 3hrs and 30mins of stupid fail husbands

Actually you know what, I think I’m fine with the Beast Yeast group basically being stuck on Beast Yeast, since that means that they’ll be sticking there and having their own story separate of whatever might be happening in Crispia. And that also means that Crispia and normal World Exploration can have stories happening simultaneously but also separately from the Beast Yeast story

Which I also realize means that the Common trio will be unavailable for any simultaneous Crispia stories, since they’ll be on Beast Yeast. So would that mean new protagonists, and/or the return of Custard III and Chili Pepper in the main story? Or that the remaining Ancients will be the new protagonists? I’m not sure

But anyways, I think it’d be great if we have just insane stuff happen on both ends and new people getting recruited, and so when the two teams finally meet back up, it’ll be like “…okay well stuff definitely happened on YOUR end, we should probably compare notes”

And also it’d be funny if the Beast Yeast group completely forgets that the whole White Lily thing is an elephant in the room until the other Ancients react so she just shows up with them no warning and the Beast Yeast group is all chill about while the Crispia group is freaking out

i would love it if my prof cancels my 4pm class. i decided im going to skip anyways but id feel less guilty about it if he cancels 🙏

Would love to work my way back up to being the type of person who can do more than 2 or 3 things per week and in fact possibly even does multiple things in the same day but boy I am not there yet

put 712 of the worst words ever put in a google doc tonight BUT! it is 712 more words in the google doc than i had yesterday. this fic will be more than 2k, so help me god

pros of waking up earlier in the morning: wow i’m getting so much work done. i have so much time for the rest of the day. what do you mean i’m already almost done with this assignment it’s not even noon yet?

cons of waking up earlier in the morning: i have to actually wake up early in the morning