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hemmohaze · 5 days

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Weekend Getaway

warnings: smut, alcohol consumption, and cursing

authors note: literary wrote all of this while listening to b-Sides and rarities

Coachella Weekend 2019

The drive to the house they'd all be staying at during Coachella should've been an only hour but due to Micheal's dick not be able to control itself once he saw Kalani in just his Final Fantasy shirt and a thong, they were late because he wanted to fuck her senseless in their shower.

Also heavy traffic on the highway was halting them. So now the couple was an hour away from the house.

Kalani stuck her head out of the window and sighed seeing cars for days. "We wouldn't be in this problem if your dick couldn't control yourself." She mumbled, pulling up Candy Crush on her phone.

"If I remember correctly all I heard from you was 'Oh fuck! Don't stop don't stop. Your dick is so good’ He imitated Kalani. "Don't remember you complaining."

"Don't stop doing what you're doing. Every time you move to the beat it gets harder for me and you know it know it." Kalani starts singing their most hated song earning a blank stare from Micheal.

"I hate you. That song is god awful."

“I mean you were a horny teenage boy. Looks like not much has changed.” She patted his thigh.

Before he could come up with a snarky remark the touch screen in his car lit up with Ashton's contact.

"Hello?" He answered.

"Where are you two?" Ashton questioned seeming worried per usual.

"Stuck in freeway traffic. Yeah I know man it’s awful. We'll be there as soon as we can but no promises it’ll be in 20 minutes. Go talk to KayKay.” He hung up.

"He truly is such an old man." Kalani joked as she adjusted the straps on her tank top. Her under boob sweat was going to be miserable since she decided to go braless with this specific top and the air conditioner was doing nothing for her.

She placed her feet in the dashboard and dozed off during the slow traffic and the low playlist playing.

Thankfully with Micheal driving a little faster and definitely breaking some traffic laws, they got to the place with everyone waiting in their cars since Kalani had the keys to the house.

The boys unloaded their cars while Sierra,Kalani, and KayKay squealed once they saw one another.

"Sierra! You look amazing." She complimented her friend's new hair. Recently she'd gotten extensions for Coachella specifically.

“KayKay your hair looks awesome too!” She exclaimed with a smile looking at her black bob.

“Thanks. It was such a bitch to cut.” She chuckled.

"Kalani you’re glowing. Your pilates is obviously paying off girl you look so good!!" Sierra slapped her butt playfully.

“I can’t wait for a weekend of girl time while our boys do manly things.” She joked wrapping her arm around Sierra’s and KayKay’s leading them in the house and telling everyone where their rooms were.

————

Three hours passed and the group was around the firepit drinking with a collective playlist playing on a speaker.

Micheal's eyes kept taking in Kalani's appearance while he was in mid conversation with Luke. The way her curls bounced in wind, the way her face lit up whenever she was talking about something to her vlog camera that excited her to Sierra, the bright red tube top mixed with her glowing tan skin and hand tattoos that were so delicately placed and beautifully drawn on her skin. She was the most beautiful woman he's ever laid eyes on.

“I think your mans is staring at you.” Sierra nodded her head to Micheal who was at the fire-pit while the two girls had their feet in the pool water. He waved to her making a crimson blush creep on her face.

Slowly when it was getting dark the group made it inside into their respective rooms. Micheal sat on the bed, mindlessly scrolling through the TV to find something to watch while Kalani showered to get the day off of her while she also had a surprise for him. In preparation because she was determined to get dicked down, she shaved basically everywhere so she was a hairless cat.

Quickly drying off and lathering herself in vanilla lotion she grabbed a hot pink lace set she got from Skims in the mail two weeks ago, less to Micheal's knowledge. She looked at herself in the full length mirror and smiled at her appearance. She felt so sexy and confident.

Micheal knocked on the door noticing she was gone a while. "You good in there?"

"Yeah I'm coming out now!"

She opened the door walking out and Micheal's jaw dropped at the woman he gets to call his girlfriend.

"Do you like it?" She tucked a curl behind her ear in anxiety that he wouldn’t like it.

"Like it? Baby I love this, you look so sexy and beautiful, fuck got me at a loss for words here." He took her tattooed hand and pulled her in his lap.

She smiled down at him and leaned closer to place her lips on his. It was a slow and passionate kiss.

“Can I suck your dick please.” She asked between open mouth kisses.

He nodded his head and moved closer to sit on the edge of the bed, his breathing picking up as Kalani made her way on her knees kissing every mark and little teasing touches until she got to his basketball shorts.

Micheal jutted his hips up so she could take them off him. He let out a breathless moan as the cold air of the room hit his already hard cock.

She bit her lip in anticipation and spit in her hand before stroking him slowly. She kitten licked his tip until fully putting his length in her mouth. She closed her eyes moaning around his cock. She hasn’t gotten the chance to suck him off in forever and god did she miss it.

Micheal whined at the sight of his girlfriend going down on him. Normally he goes down on her first but he did miss her ungodly mouth. It made things worse that she was rubbing herself through her panties.

“Take those off. I wanna see you play with your pretty pussy.” He motioned.

She nodded and threw them across the room, startling Southy, who ran out of the room towards Luke and Sierra’s where Sadie was. Moose was somewhere in Ashton��s room since she wasn’t a big fan of Calum.

She pulled back slightly as she started to gag, drool and faint mascara tears in her eyes as she kissed around his length and slipped him back in her mouth, determined to make him cum.

She bobbed her head a bit faster as his abdomen tightened. Knowing he was close he pulled her face back slightly.

“Fuck let me come on your tits please.” He groaned making her nod. She slipped his length out of her mouth and widened her eyes making her look more innocent as he jerked his length as she felt the sticky substance fall on her boobs.

Micheal picked her up and laid her across the bed with him over her. “Fuck, that was amazing baby.”

“Well I finally got to suck you off after months of waiting for you to say yes.” She giggled, obviously still stuck in his post orgasm haze.

“Not my fault your pussy is incredible.”

She leaned up to kiss him as she jutted her hips into his.

“Someone’s needy.” He teased making her whine.

“Mikey please.” She said spreading her legs, showing her glistening arsoual.

He lined himself up with her and pushed all the way until he was balls deep almost. Waiting for her nod of approval, he started moving slowly in and out of her. His thrusts were small and rapid as he buried her head in his neck, speeding up his thrusts.

“Oh shit.” She moaned out, not caring who heard her.

“That feels good huh? My thick cock in this little tight pussy.”

Kalani moaned in response and clawed at his back. One hand was next her head while the other was on her hip holding him up so he wouldn’t squish her.

His hand traveled down to her swollen clit as he rubbed it in slow circles making her jerk.

“Mikey I’m so close.” She moaned into his shoulder. Her nails gripping his back leaving little crescent moons.

“You wanna come for me lovie?” He grunted, watching her face contort into pleasure as she came undone as her walls clenched uncontrollably against his throbbing cock. “That’s it baby.”

“Kalani fuck.” He moaned out as his thrust came to a complete halt as he came inside her. Their heavy breathing and the smell of sex lingering in the room. He pulled out of her giving her forehead a gentle kiss. “I’ll be right back.”

She rolled over as she heard the water being turned on quickly and his hand tapping her thighs open so he could drag the warm washcloth cleaning her gently. He reached her clit that was still puffy as she whined from overstimulation. “I know baby, you did so good though.”

He dug in his bag pulling out a muscle tee and leaving her pantie less due to her still clenching around nothing.

As much as he doesn’t want to admit it but him being the reason she’s still clenching makes him feel so special.

Climbing into bed he pulled her close to his chest as she was already dozing off.

“God damn y’all are so loud! Some of us are trying to sleep.” Calum’s voice rang through the house. “You also owe Roy 20 bucks.”

Kalani groaned in embarrassment as Micheal rolled his eyes in annoyance. “I’m gonna kill them both tomorrow.” He whispered.

“Yes tomorrow but right now we need sleep. Don’t kill Roy though, Cal’s probably messing with you. Roy’s too nice for that.” Kalani said as she disappeared into a deep sleep.

#micheal clifford fanfic #5sos #micheal clifford #luke hemmings #calum hood #ashton irwin #micheal 5sos #5sos fanfic #5sos smut #bad decisions #5sos imagine

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5sosfanfictioncatalogue · 3 months

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Luke and Ashton Hate Each Other Masterlist

7 Minutes in Heaven (ao3) - xdistorted_cliffordx luke/ashton T, 54k

Summary: "Who wants to play?"

Ashton is a very dedicated party-goer, being at one each weekend. It's literally his life, he thinks. Though, when he's invited to one particular party, they decide to change it up a bit and play party games after a few hours and everyone is well buzzed. Ashton's never been big into party games, but he figures why not? They're rated R games, so they're bound to be fun.

Luke hates parties. He hates spending his free time socializing, period. He would rather spend a Saturday night on the couch, watching Criminal Minds and stuffing his face with pizza. But one night, his friend forces him to go to a party. Obviously, he hates it, especially when the party games come out. He's forced to play them and he doesn't really like anyone he's going to have to play against. Luke just wants to go home before all this supposed 'fun' starts.

Little do both boys know, that one certain game is going to bring them both together and may even change Luke's usual routine of not partying or Ashton's obsession with partying.

Drum Teacher (ao3) - Larrys_Fairy luke/ashton G, 3k

Summary: Luke wants drum lessons. Michael and Calum know a guy named Ashton. Luke hates Ashton. But Michael and Calum force him to do it.

for the art of war (ao3) - cyberpunknct luke/ashton T, 43k

Summary: Luke wasn't sure exactly when his life turned into a train wreck, but he knew that it probably coincided with the day he met Ashton.

I Hate That I Don't Hate You (ao3) - lukey_irwie luke/ashton M, 4k

Summary: Or the one where they're both rising chefs who hate each other and tensions only rise when they get put on a competition show together.

Press Restart (ao3) - Yes_Kassiopeia luke/ashton E, 7k

Summary: Lashton one shot. Basically Ashton hated Luke and Luke hated Ashton. Everybody in school knew that. But when they got stuck to spend some time together they found out that maybe they didn't hate each other that much...

“What the hell?!” Ashton mutter under his breath. “What the hell?!” Luke echoed out loud not even a second later. Ashton took the sight of the desert parking lot and understand immediately. “Where is the bus?” he asked, alarmed.

Scene 14 (ao3) - @daydadahlias (cornflowerblye (daydahlias)) luke/ashton, michael/crystal, roy/calum E, 128k

Summary: the one where Luke hates Ashton but has to pretend to be in love with him for five months for his acting final except for the fact that maybe he isn't pretending anymore.

Take Me Out (to the Ballgame) (ao3) - no_clue_who luke/ashton, roy/calum, kaykay/sierra T, 35k

Summary: Luke Hemmings is the best pitcher on his team, he's happy there. He has a life with that team.

Everything changes when he gets traded to his teams rival, when he get traded to Ashton fucking Irwin's team.

He was so screwed.

Tell Me I'm Pretty (ao3) - felixandtae luke/ashton, michael/calum E, 84k (WIP)

Summary: "Wearing skirts and putting make up on doesn't make me a girl. I have a dick and I can very well show you it. Just tell me I'm pretty, Luke."

Ashton likes to wear make up and Luke likes when Ashton wears make up. But, Luke doesn't like Ashton and Ashton doesn't like Luke. So how did they end up fucking in the auditorium every Friday night?

the office (ao3) - softirwin luke/ashton, michael/calum T, 24k

Summary: Everybody works in an office and Ashton really, really hates Luke.

we are perfect (Lashton version) (ao3) - loserpolarbears (orphan_account) luke/ashton, michael/calum, calum/ashton M, 8k

Summary: „You’re an asshole.” The boy glared at him, eyes sparkling with anger. „And I’m Ashton, you seemed to remember last night when you fucked me, but I guess your memories vanish as soon as you come, right. Bye.” He said and by the time Luke realized he was talking he was already out of his apartment. Luke rolled his eyes and went to the kitchen to make some coffee.

#5sosfanfictioncatalogue #5sos fanfic #masterlists #luke hemmings #ashton irwin #lashtonhate masterlist

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talkfastromance4 · 1 year

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And now for my second wish is a Luke and Lily where one of the boys (calum, most likely) fucks ups and spills out the santa secret and Lily hears by accident and then Luke and the boys are chaotically trying to make it up to her and the children by dressing up (maybe all of them end up dressing up as santa or something?) happy ending ❤️

The dialog of the letter to santa, I can’t remember the number tho

Got a little carried away, I hope you don’t mind!🥰🎅🏼

The whole family is standing together in the auditorium after watching Lily’s winter ballet recital. She was the lead snow fairy and her dancing has improved so much. The confidence she has onstage fills you with joy.

While you’re all waiting for her to come back after getting her things, you’re discussing Christmas plans the party coming up at Ashton and KayKay’s. Oliver is sleeping against Luke’s shoulder, his little snores filling the space as he is just getting over a bit of a cold.

“Who’s dressing up as Santa this year?” Cal asks. “The beard gave me a rash last time.”

“Lily!” Posy suddenly shouts and is hugging her big sister. Violetta hobbles over to her as well, her little arms outstretched.

Lily hugs them but looks a little sad and confused as she stares up at her uncle. You really hope she didn’t hear Cal’s comment about dressing up as Santa.

Back at home after putting Olly to bed, you make mugs of hot cocoa for Lily and Posy along with markers and paper to write their letters to Santa. It’s tradition and every year on Christmas Eve someone dresses up as Santa and reads them a letter he wrote for them along with a special gift for them to open.

Posy is ‘writing’ (it’s scribbles along the construction paper) but Lily is staring at hers spinning her spoon in her cocoa.

“Aren’t you going to write your letter to Santa, my sweet?” Luke asks, touching the top of her head. He sits down and grabs a sheet of paper as well.

“Are you daddy?” Posy asks, her tongue sticking between her lips in concentration.

“Of course I am, and for Olly since he can’t write yet.”

“Will Santa get it?” Lily asks. “How does he write back so fast and visit us?”

“He uses his Christmas magic,” you explain and share a look with Luke.

Lily ‘hmph’s’ and finishes her cocoa while staring at her paper.

Later on as the girls are getting ready for bed you overhear Lily and Posy talking quietly in Lily’s room. She lets Posy feed her betta fish, Bruno.

“Santa’s not gonna know what you want if you don’t write him,” Posy says.

“You think he’s real, Po?”

“Duh. We seen him at the store and Polar Express and he comes to Unca Ash’s house all the time.”

“Unca Cal says someone dressed as him…”

***

“Cal ruined Santa for Lily,” you whisper-shout to Luke who’s wiping his face after washing it in your bathroom.

“What? How?”

“I overheard her with Posy just now and she mentioned what he said about dressing up as Santa.”

“Lovie,” Luke approaches you and nudges your lip with his thumb, “you’re pouting.”

“Cal better fix this.”

***

For the next week, the guys dress up as Santa on different days to see Lily and Posy. They show up at school. At her dance class. It’s all in good spirits but Lily is even more skeptical.

You’re at your work for a Christmas party and the kids were allowed to come with you. Lily and Posy had on pretty red and green velvet dresses with bows in their hair. Oliver was back home with Ashton and KayKay watching him while you were out.

You’ve been feeling out of sorts since Halloween and the appetizer that’s being passed around has been making your stomach roll. It smells like something with bacon so you steer clear of it when it passes you.

“Are you all right?” Luke asks in concern, he places his hand on your lower back. “You look a little pale.”

“I’m fine,” you nod your head, “must be all the craziness with the holidays this year.”

Just then, you hear a booming “Ho! Ho! Ho!” and Santa Claus comes walking in with a big red bag over his shoulder.

“Santa! Mama it’s Santa!” Posy shouts clapping her hands together, her eyes shining with joy.

“I heard there’s two little girls here waiting for me? Lily and Posy?” Santa asks looking around the room.

“Hi Santa!” Posy squeals running towards him. Lily follows along a little more carefully.

“I hope this works,” Luke says leading you towards the front of the office where Santa is given a chair from Cheri.

“You must be Posy,” Santa smiles at her. “Comet is always excited to come visit your house, he loves the cookies you make.”

“Really?” Posy gasps, her mouth wide open. “Daddy! Comet likes our cookies!”

“I heard, bug,” Luke smiles and wraps his arms around your waist. You lean against him for support, you were starting to feel a little dizzy and you hoped you won’t smell bacon anytime soon.

“And Lily, you always write the sweetest letters to me. I hear you were the lead snow fairy in the recital, is that right?”

“Yes.”

“I brought you both a special gift tonight,” Santa reaches into his bag and pulls out two small red boxes. They’re tied with a white ribbon.

Lily and Posy sit on the floor to open it, Posy struggles with the bow and hands it off to Lily who unties it for her. Posy pulls the top of the box off and gasps. Lily is more careful but you hear her gasp softly as well.

“It’s a bell! Like the movie!” Posy exclaims and runs towards you and Luke. “Look!”

She jingles it and it sends off a very sweet tinkling sound.

“It sounds beautiful,” you smile at her.

“You hear it?”

“Of course I can. What do you say to Santa?” you turn her around and she runs towards Santa.

“Thank you Santa! It’s just what I wanted!” she hugs him tightly.

Santa and the rest of the room laugh at her gratitude, she says every gift is what she wanted this time of year. But it makes you happy that she appreciates everything she gets.

“Is this really from your sleigh?” Lily asks.

“It is, but yours is a bit more special. Rudolph has said you’ve been feeling a little sad sometimes. You and your family have been through a lot, right?” Santa asks and she nods. “Well, Rudolph hates seeing you sad so he told me to give you the bell he used when he flew the first time for me in the fog.”

“Really?” Lily looks down at the bell in her palms. “Wow, thank you Santa. And Rudolph.”

“You’re welcome. You keep it and the magic safe for me and Rudolph, okay?”

You all pose for pictures with him, he even hands you a small box for Oliver that contains a bell.

“You take care now, y/n, I expect I’ll be bringing another one of these for you next year,” Santa winks. He gives a final wave goodbye and a deep “Ho! Ho! Ho!” and he exits the office. The room fills with excited chatter.

“What did he mean we’ll need another one of these next year?” Luke asks.

“I’m not sure…” you respond slowly staring at the bell in the box. “How did he know all of that stuff about Lily and Posy? Hey, Cheri!”

“Yeah, hon?” Cheri walks over with her Santa hat a little off kilter. She’s on her third glass of eggnog.

“Did you tell the guy who dressed as Santa about me and my family?” you ask quietly, Lily and Posy are nearby showing off their bells to your coworkers.

“You didn’t hire him?” Cheri asks clearly confused.

“No…are you telling me you didn’t?”

“I had no idea Santa was coming here tonight. I thought it was one of your brothers, Luke dressed up as him.”

Cheri walks off as she is called over by her husband who is wearing a headband that has a dangling mistletoe hanging from it.

“Was that actually–”

“It can’t be–”

You and Luke exchange a look just as you hear a faint chorus of bells above your heads and a ghostly ‘Merry Christmas!’

Taglist: @calumance @in-superbloom @calpalirwin @karajaynetoday @wiiildflowerrr @sunshineeeluke @littledrummeraussie @suchalonelysunflower @hoodhoran @thew0rldneedsmcreycghurt @sunshineeashton @ashtonsunflower @mymindwide @itjustkindahappenedreally @seanna313 @mulletcal @pandaxnienke @celestialams @in-a-world-of-fandoms @blairscott

#12 days of 5sosmas #5sos blurbs #luke&lily blurb

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lashton-is-my-drug · 2 years

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5SOS “Older” promo observations

September 7, 2022 - Today the new 5SOS song “Older” drops, Ashton reposts only the promo videos with Luke and doesn’t include any tags. This morning he also posts a Peter Gabriel song “Sledgehammer” (which albeit an iconic song with great musicality) which is about sex and the lyrics are loaded with phallic symbols. The title of the song and various other references throughout it are a euphemism to the male genitalia.

Luke’s posts regarding “Older”. Posts clips of acoustic Luke only performing the song. Only reposts the videos (which don’t include her voice anywhere) and doesn’t tag her anywhere.

Compared to Michael, who has pushed the stunts numerous times and has brought up the stunts even when not asked about during interviews, includes S in his tags. Luke, Ash, or Cal don’t tag her in anything. The videos are of Luke singing acoustically by himself, which is so pretty on its own merit, and full on I wish that was the version we got on the album. S’s voice just wasn’t necessary, imo. The boys Like Sierra’s ig post but none of them put it to their own ig stories. There’s so much shade in this song drop!

Crystal (Michael’s supposed wife) is the reason Sierra was brought into the picture. Crystal’s profession is PR. She is the one who setup Luke with Sierra, Ashton with Kaykay (also applies with Marg, no longer narratively together yet she still stays friends with Ash’s work friends, this is weird because typically when you breakup with someone they don’t stay in your friend connections, which supports those whole “relationships” were a PR/bearding stunts contracts. They seem to stay connected with the other women because it’s all business, albeit toxic business.).

Then Sierra on HER OWN IG ACCT makes a post trying to convince us that this is her choosing to “stay behind the scenes” and letting the fans use a story about how Michael told them to finish a song that she and Luke had started on a voice note of Luke’s (which Luke had shared as a joke *hint hint* meaning he didn’t feel much of an emotional connection attachment to it) Luke shared it as a joke and now she’s narratively putting it across as a very meaningful Lierra love song. HONEY. Stop trying to make fetch happen 😂

She’s saying she stopped pursuing an artist career (doesn’t discount the amount she has used Luke’s career as solo and with 5sos for a paycheck and PR for herself), yet since she was put together with Luke, she has written and/or appeared on EVERY RECORD LUKE IS ON INCLUDING HIS SOLO. The engagement was announced at the same time his solo record was announced (even though supposedly it had happened months before. Why wait? Oh yes…. The PR for herself! Use the attention for his projects to gain attention to yourself.)

S making this type of statement for this song sounds so disingenuous. She’s insisting she wants to stay Behind The Scenes yet she’s one of the songwriters and her airy vocals are mixed so high in the track that hers pretty much overshadow Luke’s. The title of the song is “Older (featuring Sierra Deaton)”. If you want to stay bts, this doesn’t look like how you would do it. This is such irony. And again, her narrative of the song uses the PR relationship for attention.

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youngxcalm · 12 days

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🥰

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tirednotflirting · 2 years

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It cashton pull up to a rodeo, I’m a goner

jess literally the first example of me losing my shit over cashton was when they popped up at the houston rodeo in 2019 like

lemme set the scene

i sorta Arrived here (5sos tumblr) in like late 2018. they dropped myt live and i was like Excuse Me and then i’ve just been around ever since. but like mid march 2019 i’m just minding my own business scrolling tumblr while my friends are all in mexico for spring break and it turns out that cashton are in houston for a wedding i think??? (never actually really figured out the why but i think kaykay is from somewhere down there so idk) and im like ‘okay dope’ and then the next day they’re outside of nrg stadium and ashton is in a cowboy hat and i 100% contribute my sticking around here to that exact event. i’m a southern gal at heart.

pls see the pic below i stole from google bc i couldn’t find it in my camera roll (i forgot calum was blonde at this point in time and now i need a min)

#i love college football and cheap beer and men in cowboy hats and im only kinda sorry about it

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daydadahlias · 7 months

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Hi Jess, I hope your time off helped and you feel better now. Here's happy Ashton giving you flowers 💜

fun fact, this is actually one of my fave ashton pics ever. i printed it out and put it on my senior board in high school <3

#kaykay laid it tf down w/ this photoshoot #stand by it honestly #no ashton photoshoots have ever hit so hard #she fucked it UP #pigeon #vasattope #thanks raq!

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an-emotional-blender · 10 months

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Ashton Irwin - Wish You The Best (BLURB)

Ash and I had been dating for 7 years when KayKay came into the picture.

It was sudden and totally unexpected. But, she turned his head.

I didn't even think that was possible after 7 years.

How dumb.

The distancing started off slow.

Practically invisible.

He cancelled a few date nights here and there. But that was it.

Then it turned.

So very quickly.

We fought every night. I don't think there was one night in the last 6 months of our relationship that we slept next to each other. I don’t know why we let it get so bad.

Enough was enough. We sat down. We talked. We cried. We broke. We mended. We separated.

We were okay. We agreed to stay friends considering we had been friends for 8 years before we dated.

It was supposed to be so easy.

Surprise surprise, it wasn't.

"5 Seconds of Summer drummer, Ashton Irwin, makes it official with, KayKay Blaisdell, just weeks after separating from long term girlfriend."

Well then.

#ashton irwin #ashton #5sos #5 seconds of summer

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pixiegrl · 1 year

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Oh, you don’t write her as a pairing? Thanks for answering me!

Ive written her in a luke/ashton/kaykay/sierra thing and sierra/kaykay but ive never explored outside of that

#asks #anon

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lovesosweeet · 5 months

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better left unsaid // cth

chapter forty two

in which orion has leukemia, and calum doesn’t know.

calum hood x fem!oc

read other chapters

november 21, 2018 los angeles, california calum

Hearing from Emelia was not on my bingo card for today. I know she has been in contact with some of the others pretty regularly, mostly KayKay and Crystal, maybe Luke, and I think some with Ashton, too, but she has not reached out to me personally since everything happened, aside from when I texted her a week or so ago. When her name pops up on my screen saying that she’s calling me, my heart drops.

‘Is she dead?’ is the first question that pops into my mind, and with that, I start crying while I swipe across the screen to answer the call. Would Em call me if Orion died? I would think so. I’d hope so.

“Emelia?” I ask into the speaker. My voice is wavering with nerves. She can’t be dead yet. She looked fine when I saw her last. Frail, and sick, but she didn’t look like she was on her last leg. Please, please don’t tell me she’s dead.

Emelia starts crying into the line, and it only makes me even more nervous. She hiccups and then takes a deep breath before she speaks.

“Cal, she needs you.”

I’m thankful that it’s not a notice of her death, but it’s still not good news.

“She’s too scared to say anything herself. She doesn’t think you’d pick up if she called, but I knew you’d pick up. She’s… not doing great, but the depression is wearing her down faster than the cancer. I’m sorry to ask like this, I just can’t watch her spend another day crying in bed and too sad to eat or do—“

“Em, breathe,” I say to her. She and Orion do the same thing under stress: just keep talking to explain something that they made clear with their first few words. “I’m leaving now.”

I don’t think twice. I need to go to her. If Emelia is saying Orion needs me, then I’m there. I’m dropping everything and I’m going. I don’t care if Orion broke up with me. I know she still loves me and I still love her more than I’ve ever loved anything or anyone. If Emelia thinks it’s time for me to go to Orion, I’m going. Emelia asking me to go is practically the same as Orion asking me to. Their hearts are almost the same and they know each other better than they know themselves.

I don’t bother to do anything like pack or take care of Duke. I’ll have Luke or Sierra come take care of him. I just grab my keys, wallet and shoes and walk out the door in a matter of seconds. I don’t know how long I’ll be gone, but none of that matters, all I know is I need to leave.

“We’re at her moms’. Do you need the address?”

“Em, it’s only been a month and a half since I was there. I don’t need the address.” I laugh quietly, even though I’m a mess of nerves and worry.

“Right, sorry. It just feels like it’s been a million years.”

I am in the elevator now, riding it down to the lobby.

“I know. It’s been fucking brutal,” I confess.

The elevator doors open up to the lobby where Ron is on the phone. I nod to him and he waves. He’s been devastated that Orion is gone, but in her absence, I’ve made an effort to make conversation with him whenever I can, so we wave or chat every time I see him. I get through the lobby and then to the garage. I hop in my car and start it, still on the line with Emelia, who’s just crying.

“It’s okay, Em. I’m on my way, alright?” It has to be okay.

“Thanks, Cal. She’s not the same without you.”

“I haven’t been whole either.” I don’t know how I lived before Orion. Now that I have had her, my life doesn’t feel right without her. Orion made everything in the world make sense. She showed me the best of humanity, the brightest light, and the purest love. I get to go to her again, and the prospect makes my heart light up again.

I put my Jeep in reverse and then zip out of the parking garage, turning onto the busy street.

Emelia laughs. “Yeah, I’ve seen all the shit on Twitter.”

Twitter has been a hellscape of mostly well-intentioned fans commenting on my very apparent heartbreak. Everything I do on stage or in public is documented and it feels as if everyone on the planet knows I’m depressed and recently single. Me being spotted in Cologne with Paula was just another catastrophe for the fans.

“Did you expect anything else out of our fans?”

“Not in the slightest,” she says. “Okay, I’ll let you go since you’re driving. I’ll see you soon?”

“Yeah, I’ll be there as quick as I can.”

The drive feels like it takes forever, and I feel all kinds of nerves. I don’t think Orion knows I’m coming, so I hope Emelia wasn’t wrong in calling me. I pray she wasn’t wrong.

The thought of holding her again has me giddy, but I know that she won’t be feeling well. She’s not doing well at all, and I feel somewhat selfish for being excited. I’m also nervous to see her, knowing what Emelia just said about her. She’s not doing well. I wonder how much smaller she is, how much her hair has grown, and how the treatment plan has been going.

Circumstances are less than good, but I’m looking forward to seeing her regardless. Seeing my girl again is all I’ve wanted since she made me leave, and it’s happening now.

I call Luke while I drive once I see signs saying I’ve reached San Diego and can turn off my GPS. I know how to get to the Moss household from here.

“Hey, what’s up?” Luke asks, answering only after a few rings.

“Hey, not sure how long I’ll be gone, but I’m on my way to see Orion right now.”

I have more to say, but I know he will have questions, so I stop talking to give him a chance to ask whatever he wants. He fulfills my prophecy instantly and starts spewing questions.

“Wait, what? How? Why? What happened?”

“Em called me and said she needs me, so I’m going.”

“That’s… good and bad, I guess.”

“I know.”

“So you’re going to San Diego?”

“Yeah, and I was hoping you and Si can take care of Duke for me?” I haven’t thought about the prospect of him saying no, so I’m hoping he says yes.

“Of course, whatever you need.”

“Thanks, Luke. I owe you one.”

“No, you don’t. This is the least I can do for you and O. I’ll go get Duke in a bit and keep him here for now. Petunia will be happy to have a friend.”

Duke and Petunia are very different in size, but they love to play together.

“Thanks. I’m sure Duke will be excited to play.”

“His food and stuff is still in the same spot?”

“Yeah, nothing’s changed.” Except Orion doesn’t live there anymore.

“Sweet, I’ll let you go. Let me know if you guys need anything else, yeah?”

“Sounds good. Thanks again, Luke, you’re the best.”

We hang up right as I turn onto the Moss family’s street. I see Emelia’s and Orion’s cars in the driveway and park behind them. Her moms must be at work since their cars are gone. As I pull in behind Em’s car, the front door opens and she waves to me. I park and get out, running up to hug her.

She looks rough, and she’s not the one sick, so I know Orion is worse off. Emelia’s eyes are brimmed with tears, red and puffy. She welcomes me with open arms and hugs me tightly.

“Thanks for coming,” she whispers.

Had she thought I wouldn’t? In what world would I not have come when she called? I love Emelia, and of course, I love Orion even more. There’s nothing I wouldn’t do for either of them.

“Em, you could’ve called me at 3 in the morning and I’d be here as soon as humanly possible. If I was anywhere else in the world right now, I’d be on the first flight to San Diego, seriously. Thank you for calling me.”

“I know that’s how it would’ve been before, but I wasn’t sure, with everything…” She whispers into my chest, sniffling quietly.

“Nothing could ever change how I feel about Orion. You know this. I love her with every single cell in my body.” I hope she can hear the sincerity in my voice. I mean it. I don’t think that there is anything that girl could do that would diminish my love.

Emelia steps away from me then and smiles. “I’ve missed you guys being gross together.”

“Can we go be gross now? Does she know I’m coming?”

“No, she’s been asleep for a few hours. She’d had a bit of a breakdown earlier and I called Ash freaking out, because I wanted to call you but wasn’t sure, and he said I should call you, so I did.”

I make a mental note to give Ashton a few points, but he’s still very deep into the negatives. Nonetheless, I’m grateful that he knew me enough to urge Em to call me. If he hadn’t, I would be spending another day alone, mourning my relationship and sitting in the dark about how the girl of my dreams is doing. Instead, I get to see her again.

“What was the breakdown?” I ask.

“Oh, you know, just Orion things. She’d been doing a Twitter deep dive and felt awful for seeing how bad you’re doing, hurt by the shit people are saying negatively about her. She feels like she ruined everyone’s life. She’s feeling lonely, depressed, and—fuck, I guess I should let her update you on her treatment and stuff.” Emelia sighs, her forehead wrinkled with worry. “Here, come inside. Want coffee? Tea?”

She opens the door to the house for me, and then she guides me to the kitchen. She gets out the electric kettle and fills it with water before I even answer her.

“I’ll do tea if you’re making some.”

Emelia nods, switching the kettle on before grabbing mugs. I instantly recognize Orion’s favorite Madrid mug and another she had thrifted a few months ago. She’d taken them from our apartment, and I’m glad to see they’re getting some use here.

Once the water starts to boil, she turns the kettle off, plops tea bags into the mugs, and then pours the hot water in. She hands me the Madrid mug — I honestly used it far more than Orion did, but it was technically hers so I couldn’t fight her on taking it with her — and I’m happy to get to use it again. As I go to take a sip from my tea, I hear footsteps on the floor above us.

“Em?! Where the hell did you go?” Orion yells.

Hearing her voice for the first time in a month and a half makes my heart skip a beat.

“Downstairs!” Em yells back, and then she smiles at me knowingly. She’s stopped crying now, but her face is still blotchy and her eyes are still bright red.

I turn to be able to see Orion as she comes down the stairs in search of her best friend. Her bunny slipper-covered feet appear first, and then baggy black sweatpants, and then an All Blacks hoodie that I had bought her last year. Her brown eyes widen as she sees me standing in the kitchen. Her face morphs through almost every emotion imaginable: shock, joy, anger, shock again, and then she’s crying what I hope are happy tears.

Her short hair is now long enough that she can messily tie it back. Her cheeks are even more hollow than they were in October, the bags under her eyes darker, and the light in her face is just… gone. But, at least she’s smiling right now.

We both hurry to each other, her throwing her arms around my neck and I lift her up so I can squeeze her as close to me as physically possible. She’s so light and fragile feeling, I worry I’ll crush her, but I need to hold her like this, at least for a few moments.

“Wh—what… what are you doing here?” Orion asks with surprise laced through her tone, her voice gentle. She seems entirely shocked.

“Em called me. Here I am.”

“But… I… I thought… I’m sorry. Cal, I’m so sorry. I don’t… I don’t want to hurt you, but I missed you so much and I felt selfish for it and I just didn’t want you to watch me fade away and I knew how bad it would hurt for you and…” Orion trails off. Her words are all accompanied and disrupted by hiccups and sniffles. “I don’t deserve for you to be here.”

I place her feet back on the floor, placing my hand on the back of her head and pressing it into my chest. I smooth over the top of her hair, holding her while she tries to explain herself.

It doesn’t matter. None of it matters to me. I need to be here and I need to be with her. I don’t care how bad it hurts. I have to be here with her, by her side, for whatever she needs. That’s what I need. The amount of love she has shown me over the past two years has earned her buckets of love. She deserves for me to be here. There’s no doubt in my mind about that.

“You deserve for me to love you the way you love me. I’m putting you above me, just like you’re doing for me. I am here. I will always be here. You can’t get rid of me. The love I have for you is embedded into my skin, my soul, my blood. You’re mine, until the day I die, okay?”

Orion not giving me a chance to not go on tour was her way of loving me, and I know that. She did it because she loves me. She wanted to spare me. She suffered back in LA alone because she didn’t want me to give up on going on tour. She did it to be selfless, to put my needs above hers. I’m here now to put aside from the pain she’s caused and be here for her, because she needs me. And, god, I’ve needed her.

“But,” she starts, and I shake my head. She can’t see it, since she’s still pressed into my chest.

“No, no buts. It doesn’t matter, okay? Whatever you wanted to say, it doesn’t matter. I’m here for you and I love you and none of that is ever going to change.”

Orion goes quiet then, and the only sounds she’s making are of her shakily drawing in air. “Are you sure?”

“Yes, my love. I am sure.” I don’t know if I’ve ever been more sure of anything.

Orion squeezes me tighter, her bony arms digging into my sides, but I don’t care. Being this close to her again is the best feeling, and I don’t even care about the circumstances. All that matters is we’re together.

I can feel her tears through my shirt while she cries. I’m so happy to be here right now. It almost doesn’t feel real. It feels like an eternity and also only a few seconds that we stand here in each other’s arms, but we both snap out of it at the sound of a camera shutter.

“Shit, sorry, I thought I had the sound off!” Emelia says.

Orion and I both laugh, breaking apart to find Emelia with her phone pointed at us. She has a close-lipped smile and teary eyes, her free hand pressed against her cheek.

“I’m so fucking glad you’re back,” Em adds.

I look down at Orion, who’s staring right at me, softly smiling. “There’s nowhere else in the entire world I’d rather be.”

The three of us laze around for the afternoon, laying on the couch and watching some random movie that Emelia insists we watch. I don’t even care; all that matters is Orion and I are intertwined with her head on my chest and our arms wrapped around each other. I don’t watch the movie. I simply stare at Orion and take in every strand of hair, freckle, eyelash, pore… I just look at her, in awe that she’s back in my arms.

Around 6:00, Penny, Gloria, and Eri come home. Gloria went shopping for Thanksgiving tomorrow and Penny had to pick up Eri from his after school play date when she got off work. They were all shocked to find me in their home, but welcomed me back with open arms. We eat dinner together — just a simple spaghetti and meatballs dinner that Orion barely eats a few bites of — and then they take Eri on an evening walk around the neighborhood, giving Orion and me our first moment alone in forever.

“Thank you for coming,” her soft voice says. We’re back on the couch, music quietly playing in the background.

“Thank you for letting me come back.”

Orion looks up at me, tears filling her eyes again. “I was stupid to make you leave at all.”

I lean down, pressing my lips against hers. “It’s okay. We’re together now.”

She nods, trying to smile while she has tears rolling down her face. “What all did Em tell you?”

“Not much, just that you’re not doing well.”

A flash of pain — not physical pain, emotional pain — lights in her eyes. “Chemo didn’t work.”

My stomach drops. I knew it was a possibility. It had to have been, given how Em spoke about how Orion has been doing. I knew it was possible, but I didn’t actually consider it.

“What’s next, then?” I ask.

She mashes her lips together and pulls them to the side, breaking eye contact for a second before she looks back up at me. “They said I could do trials for other treatments, or I can just ride it out and take medicines to keep me comfortable until things take a turn for the worst.”

I selfishly would’ve asked her to do the trials, but I can’t imagine how grueling and uncomfortable they would have been, and if they’re trials there’s no way to really know whether they’ll do any good. I also couldn’t ask her to do anything. It’s her body and her life on the line. She deserves the ultimate say.

“What did you choose?”

“I’m just riding it out.”

I nod, trying to mask my slight disappointment. A chance at having her for the longest amount of time possible would’ve been nice, but I have to respect her choice for herself and her body. “Then I’ll be with you every single day, and I’ll do my best to keep you feeling okay. Okay?”

Orion stares at me. I watch her mentally battle her need to not let anyone help her or prioritize her and I can tell it takes a lot of strength to accept me and my help. “Okay. Thank you.”

“I love you, and I’m not going anywhere.”

She looks at me with so much love and sadness at the same time that I feel my heart constrict. “I love you, and I’m so happy you’re here.”

—

@EmeliaBoDeliaSmelia: no i don’t have permission to post this but idc. my heart is so happy and so full to have these two together again ❤️ love both of them and their love. @calum5sos & @ my bff who only has a burner twitter Image attached

@MacyLacy123: Replying to @EmeliaBoDeliaSmelia: oh my god my heart can’t take this!! THANK GOD! and thank you for sharing!!!! love everyone involved sm. true love exists! @Ashton5SOS: Replying to @EmeliaBoDeliaSmelia: best friend of the year award! @Calum5SOS: Replying to @EmeliaBoDeliaSmelia: thanks for sharing her with me, Em. love you ❤️ @CrystalLeigh: Replying to @EmeliaBoDeliaSmelia: okay WHAT i’m crying tears of joy. :’) CALL ME ASAP @5SOSGirlie: Replying to @EmeliaBoDeliaSmelia: idk what’s going on but if cal’s happy i’m happy! @5SOSUpdatesUK: Replying to @EmeliaBoDeliaSmelia: wait i thought they broke up? why is this pic so cute tho!!?? @Luke5SOS: Replying to @EmeliaBoDeliaSmelia: IM CRYING AGAIN I LOVE THEM @Michael5SOS: Replying to @Luke5SOS: bro you gotta stop crying over orion and cal @Luke5SOS: Replying to @Michael5SOS: don’t tell me what to do i’m still gonna cry! @EmeliaBoDeliaSmelia: Replying to @Luke5SOS: it’s okay luke i’m still crying too but i saw it in person @Luke5SOS: Replying to @EmeliaBoDeliaSmelia: yeah well I get to watch Duke so suck it @MaliKoa: Replying to @EmeliaBoDeliaSmelia: don’t know how we got here, but I’m so glad we are! they’re the sweetest ❤️ @PaulaPeriodista: Replying to @EmeliaBoDeliaSmelia: YES YES YES! we all needed this! thanks for making it happen! @Francesca5SOS: Replying to @PaulaPeriodista: THE UPDATE IVE BEEN WAITING FOR

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