#and the best fucking part is the boxes are always super fucking light
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#can the truck driver at work just like… not?#I’m so fed up with this dude#firstly he’s like overly friendly but in a bad way#he acts like he knows me and then assumes things about me and then gets annoyed when they’re not right#he asks me the one morning what kind of music I like and when I said edm he literally goes ‘nah you seem like a rock kind of chick’#firstly I’m not a chick secondly wtf?#and then he would not drop it- kept badgering me about it#‘are you sure? I like that kind of music too but I can’t picture you listening to it’#I asked him what edm artists he likes and he couldn’t name any and the. doubled down on the ‘no you’re holding out on me you def like rock’#also he’s low-key sexist but it’s getting worse 🫠#‘oh you can’t lift that box it’s too heavy for a woman’#dude. my guy. pls stop assuming my gender but also don’t fucking tell me what I can and can’t lift#but like the fucking audacity? do not place limits on me based on my assigned fucking gender dude#and the best fucking part is the boxes are always super fucking light#he’ll watching me lift a fucking 50lb box and then hand me a box of pillows and tell me to be careful it’s probs too heavy for a girl#my new gripe is the other day he interrupted me while I was sorting to be like ‘oh you’re so fast’#dude you’ve seen me do this every day for three months#but then! he asks if I cook and clean when I’m done with work#I thought it was a weird question because who doesn’t cook and clean and told him yeah I do#and for a brief shining moment I existed in a world where sexism doesn’t exist and thought he just hired someone to do his cleaning#nope. literally says to me ‘wow you’re the whole package! the perfect housewife!’#I had to storm off because I was fUCKING SEETHING#I am not a housewife. I am not domesticated. and it was a fucking weird thing to say to me at all#me and my husband split the chores evenly because that’s fair#this dude is divorced and I see why now#but the fucking audacity- when I tell you I was seeing red#talking about me like I’m a fucking servant- he’s said other shit before and I am getting fed up#shoutout to my husband tho- ‘housewife? ew no! you’re my feral housethey! :D’#sexist shit hits a lot of nerves- I do not need that shit + the disphoria first thing in the morning
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Wieght gain tip number 2: what should i eat 🤷♀️
Now that we talked about the best nutritional intakes to gain weight, both healthy and unhealthy, next next question to ask yourself is: what do I eat?
Now, let's start with you unhealthy piggies first. Good news for yall! You get to have all the fatty and delicious food you want 😋. Now, what is a good meal plan that will last you a week and won't hurt your wallet 🤔
Well any American knows the magnificent super store called Walmart 😌. Now what if I told you this bad boy can get you so fucking fat with only 40-50$ a week?
At 35-50$ a week: you can get around 3k calories per day for 1 whole week
Let's get the fun stuff out of the way. For your morning snack should be light compared to your afternoon snack, I recommend getting fritters. You can scarf down 720 calories with 2 fritters. A whole box of 6 fritters is merely 4 dollars, sooooo you should pick up 1-2 boxes. Your breakfast should be your lightest of your meals. If you want to go the extra mile and be lazy, I highly recommend Jimmy Dean Sausage, Egg & Cheese Croissant Sandwiches, each sandwich is 400 calories and one box has 4 sandwiches in it, so once more get 1-2 boxes for the week at this point you've spent between $10-$20 and eaten around 700-1.2k calories so far. It's not bad for a start, but im sure that tummy is still very hungry 😋. So let's move on to some lunch, and I know just the meal that will fill that gut! Starting off with your sides, you should pick up some Great Value Seasoned French Fries. 11 servings per bag with 140 calories per serving and only $3.75. As always, I recommend getting 1-2 bags like usual, of course, the more the merrier 😁. For your main meal, I recommend eating some nice and healthy American made burgers 😋, so grab some patties (recommend 20% fat 80% lean). The All Natural brand sells 12 patties per pack at $10! And if course you can eat a burger without buns, sooooo let's grab some big carb filled buns 😌. Great Value Jumbo Hamburger Buns should be the cheapest and most carb heavy buns you can get at only $2 (although you have to pick up 2 for all 12 patties). So let's have the final snack before bedtime, I think something light like walmart's famous Freshness Guaranteed Frosted Sugar Cookies should do, hehe 😉
In total, this should set you around 2.7-3k calories worth of food, which is more than enough to fatten up anyone under 200lbs
(The second part of this post will be about healthy gain, which I will post later today)
#feeding kink#feedee encouragement#feedee girl#feed me#fatty piggy#feedee belly#fat#fatty#unhealthy diet
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We always talk about super serious shit. Do you have any headcanons that are based on absolutely nothing and are light-hearted?
I think Derek is left-handed. Why? Idk, it's just what is in my heart.
sharing our inconsequential headcanons yes please
scott and stiles are each other's first kiss. they don't talk about it.
corrine was supposed to have killed peter but ended up fucking him instead. truly a fuck around and find out.
laura looked more like their dad, cora looks the most like talia but it's derek that has her eyes. peter would never admit to having feelings about that.
talia and duecalion totally fucked
maybe not exactly a happy headcanon but after allison died lydia kept one of her bows and the sweater she'd left at her house, stiles has her ring knives and scott has a small box in his closet still full of the notes they passed and arrow heads she'd left in his room.
peter would pay laura, cora and derek to lie for him. never big lies. ones like if a woman came to the house looking for "that peter hale" than he'd send them out to deflect them off. the more dramatic the more they'd get paid. cora was the best at it.
cora, laura and derek's father is from whatever south american country cora fled to and she's been living with that side of the family.
derek still owns the place he and laura lived at in new york.
claudia stilinski couldn't cook very well early her and noah's marriage. noah still can't eat meatloaf.
claudia and natalie were best friends in high school but after they drifted apart but when claudia was sick natalie visited as much as she could.
the upstairs of loft is basically a library where derek (and peter) collected the books they recovered from the hale house.
derek gave stiles the keys to the loft before he parted ways in mexico. derek said it was so they could access the small library if needed but really derek wanted to assure stiles he'd be back eventually. derek trusting stiles to look after his place while he was gone. stiles had Feelings about it.
speaking of derek and stiles. texting. all the time. it's embarrassing.
eli shares laura's birthday.
i have like a billon of these.
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Head Canons For Dante From Devil May Cry
I think about Dante way too much so I thought I would share my thoughts on some head canons of my own.
Especially since the fandom for me gets so fucking dryyyyyyy
Like please, I need more content or I'm going to spontaneously combust and not even in a hot and sexy way. (Or it still will be I just wont feel like it, but looking like hell on wheels is the goal!)
yes that was a Heathers reference don't come at me
Am I cringe? Yes.
Am I free? Yes.
These are my SFW head canons for him! If I get to it I can make my NSFW head canons as well but we'll see about that.
Gender Neutral Reader Pairing.
For my bitches, bros and fellow nonbinary hoes.
(My certification in making head canons is as follows:
I have played DMC 1, 2, 3, 4, 5. I've read all the novels, and read 3 different fan translations of the novels we don't have official English translations for.
I've watched the animated series at least 12 times and I've listened to all of the audio drama CD's.
I have canon reasons for all my head canons but some of them are just little silly things because I brain rot.
Thank you for coming to my Ted Talk.)
I apologize in advanced for any typos and grammar mistakes and or just not making sense.
I am dyslexic and autistic so I have a weird way of explaining things and will misspell basic words sometimes but I promise to do my best.
He's a big dork and his favorite thing to do is make his S/O laugh. Filling their soul with light is his favorite thing to do. teehee So he says the stupidest jokes to make them double over in laughter.
This is a bit of a double edged sword however since he uses humor and sarcasm as a major crutch / coping mechanism. He can be serious when the situation calls for it, but most of the time he doesn't want situations and mishaps to weigh on himself or those around him too heavily.
He's HELLA broke. So he'd take full advantage of free things to do like spending the night under the stars in a park after hours. Something that feels like "We aren't supposed to be out here!" but isn't really harmful / breaking the law.
I think he has some sort of collection of some sort. I think he collects seashells because they remind him of more serene times in his childhood. Probably hand sized conches or perhaps sand dollars (because its the only 'dollars' Lady cant swindle out of him ;u;)
Will die on the hill of pizza being a "balanced meal" insisting that it has all the important food groups therefore pizza is healthier than media wants people to think.
Despite his habits of leaving his pizza boxes about and letting Patty clean up after him- his own personal hygiene is actually really important to him. He always makes sure to take a shower after he gets back from every mission.
He honestly cant stand the scent of demon blood on him, it makes him a little anxious because it takes him back to the night of the fire / attack every time. (babyyyy boyyyyyyyyyyyy)
His love language is physical touch (giving) and acts of service (receiving). When he gets more comfortable with you, he's got some part of him touching you at all times: a thigh pressed against yours, a gentle hand around your shoulders or the small of your back, insistent on you laying on his shoulder or in his lap if you're tired. He'll be super appreciative of you organizing things when his mind gets too jumbled or he's just brooding.
I'm sick of people calling him lazy.
I don't think he doesn't clean up because he doesn't want to- I think he's just overwhelmed most of the time / overstimulated to do anything if he's not in battle.
I strongly feel like he has some sort of ADHD, Depression and CPTSD due to his trauma. (Losing / killing his brother several times, his mother being killed, his father up and disappearing one day, losing his found family repeatedly: Grue, Nell, Jessica... etc)
He'd probably be super understanding of a neurodivergent s/o and be more than happy to "parallel play" in the shop. He reads his magazines on the couch with you while you read a book. Or he'll try to get some semblance of work done at his desk on the occasion while you watch your favorite tv show.
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Can I please request Bonten men reacting to his foreign s/o and their kid talking in their language making them feel jealous they're left out of the conversation? I hope the request makes sense, feel free to play around with the idea ❤ thank you
BONTEN MEN REACTING TO YOU AND YOUR CHILD SPEAKING ANOTHER LANGUAGE - SANZU, RINDOU, RAN, AND MIKEY X READER
A/N: Yes, absolutely! I totally get this idea. I actually speak two langauges as well! I hope you enjoy love! Please leave asks in the ask box!
Prompt: Bonten men reacting to you and your child speaking in another language and getting jealous.
WARNINGS: slight swearing, little angst in Sanzu and Mikey's part but good ending, very light sexual themes
SANZU-
Sanzu was always attracted to you speaking your home language.
(It turned him on a lot.)
However, when you two had a child, he was extremely hesitant in letting you teach them your language.
The thought of being left out or being talked about made him very anxious and feel like an outsider.
Sanzu loved you dearly and loved your child just as much as he loved you, but there was this underlying feeling of betrayal when you began teaching the child your language.
At first, it wasn’t too bad at all as your child was just beginning to speak. In a way, Sanzu thought the way you interacted with one another was super cute. There’s just this babbling child trying to have a conversation with someone as intelligent as you. But, the jealousy was still there.
As your child got older, you two had full-fledged conversations in your home language to talk about simple things such as dinner for that night or plans for the next day.
Sanzu would become aggressive the more you two talked in your home language and would switch constantly from being sweet to being bitter.
You were not appreciative of this and were very confused by his behavior given that he had not explained his concerns from the very beginning. How was that fair for you? You could only assume work was stressing him out, or he was doing drugs again.
It continued to get worse. You and Sanzu would regularly get into arguments with one another.
Eventually, after an argument, you left the room and started talking to your child in your language.
This pissed Sanzu the fuck off.
You two proceeded to have the biggest fight of your entire relationship.
You blamed him and said he was acting like he was on drugs and he retaliated. He was very upset that you accused him of such a thing after he had made a promise to quit for your child.
Sanzu broke down out of nowhere, falling to his knees and sobbing uncontrollably.
You stood there in shock before kneeling down beside him and holding him. He hesitated a first, but eventually melted into your embrace while muttering apologies and self-deprecations.
You grabbed Sanzu’s face after hearing him talk down on himself like that and he confessed everything to you.
After the argument, you both made an agreement to be transparent with one another and that you would include him in conversation and translate for him. Hell, you even offered to teach him the language.
It was quite funny to see him trying to speak your language, but his efforts meant the world to you. <3
RINDOU-
Rindou was always super chill about you speaking your home language.
He thought knowing more than one language made you such a badass and thought you would be awesome in Bonten.
(He would never let you join though because he has sworn on his life to protect you.)
When the two of you had a child, Rindou was all about you teaching them your language. He knew how useful it was for someone to speak two languages in the working world and always wanted the absolute best for your child.
(This man is such dad material, come at me.)
Rindou even offered to buy assisting textbooks or classes for your child for additional practice.
Needless to say, your child became proficient in two languages very quickly. And Rindou also quickly learned what it was like to be left out.
He hated to admit it, but he was jealous for a bit and would bring it up to you numerous times but never told you he was jealous.
You started to pick up on it the more he talked about it and you asked if he was jealous that he couldn’t understand you and your child.
He fell silent and just slowly nodded.
You were slightly surprised at this, but when his eyes started to water a bit you immediately hugged him.
“Let me teach you,” you offered, holding him in your arms.
God this man is literally head over HEELS for you. Like, how could you be any more perfect?
He liked this idea, and you two bonded a lot through your lessons.
(Rindou also got lessons and textbooks on the side to impress you.)
THIS DUDE LITERALLY LEARNED IT ALMOST FLUENTLY IN ALMOST FIVE YEARS?????????????
He talks to you guys in your language all the time and shows it off to his friends too.
10/10 love this man
RAN-
Ran fucking loved it when you spoke in your home language. He thought it was both impressive and hot.
He was always blown away by your intelligence and would brag about it to all of his close friends in Bonten.
(May or may not have brought your talent into the bedroom and had you in for one hell of a night.)
When you guys had a child, he was ALL about letting you teach them your language. He thought you would both be such badasses and also knew that a lot of jobs offer great benefits if you speak more than one language fluently.
(People from Bonten offered you a job after hearing about your awesome teaching skills. But Ran shut that down IMMEDIATELY. He would never let the gang touch either one of you.)
Your child caught onto the language quickly and Ran was so impressed. He knew they were going to be smart just like you.
When your child got older, you regularly talked in your language in front of Ran and in public.
At first, Ran thought you were both cool, but as time went on, he started to feel a little left out.
Ran began to bottle up his jealousy, but knew it wasn’t fair to you.
So, he cooked dinner one night and sat you down. The evening was quite nice with dimmed lighting and your favorite flowers on the table for you.
Eventually, the mood shifted and you could tell he wanted to tell you something, so you asked him what was wrong.
“I feel selfish for saying this,” Ran spoke softly. “But sometimes I feel lonely.”
You were a little surprised but immediately understood where he was coming from. He sniffled slightly and you could tell he was embarrassed, so you stood up from your chair and walked over to him to hug him.
Ran couldn’t stop the single tear that fell on his cheek. And it totally broke your heart.
You told Ran that it was okay to feel that way and that you would be more considerate from now on.
Eventually, he asked you if you would teach him the language.
You were so excited when he said this and the two of you immediately got to work. You bonded during every lesson and, surprisingly, Ran picked up on the basics pretty damn fast.
It took several years before you could consider Ran fluent, and he certainly made some quite hilarious errors from time to time.
Ran literally loves you and your kid so much and it makes him so happy that he can converse with you privately.
MIKEY-
Mikey loved when you spoke in your home language, he thought it was fascinating, especially when you spoke to your friends and family.
He was genuinely impressed with the way that you could speak two languages with such ease. But, he knew that your home language suited you the most and he respected that.
When the two of you had a child together, he was totally on-board with you teaching them how to speak your language!
Though, when your child got a little bit older, he felt really left out. Mikey didn’t necessarily feel like you were being secretive with him at all, but he felt so lonely when you didn’t include him in your conversations. :(
Instead of opening up about it, Mikey decided not to say anything and just started slowly pushing himself away from you.
It started out as small things such as averting his eyes from you. His eye contact became minimal and you immediately picked up on it, but thought that maybe it was because he was struggling with his work life. You were aware of the things that he did outside of your home and how it had a toll on him. So, you decided to give him space.
(Bad idea from both sides.)
Things escalated to Mikey barely talking to you and avoiding conversation as much as possible. One night, he came home drunk which was EXTREMELY out of character for him.
The two of you got into a fight over his behavior and it brought up a lot of emotions.
Mikey eventually yelled, “I’M SICK OF BEING LEFT OUT!”
You were taken aback, and quite confused, but when the tears fell from Mikey’s soulless eyes, you ran up to him and held him close.
“Mikey,” you ran your hands through his locks. “What’s going on, love?”
“I hate feeling like I’m not a part of the family,” he sobbed into your shoulder. “I wish I could understand you.”
The two of you had a deep discussion about it and made up. Mikey gave you a heartfelt apology and you both decided to try and be more inclusive by including him in conversations and translating for him.
Mikey also started to pick up on the language and tried to speak it every now and then. <3
#mikey tokyo revengers#mikey#mikey sano#toman#sano majiro x reader#sano manjiro#tokyo revengers fic#tokyo revengers x reader#tokyo revengers headcanons#ran haitani x y/n#ran haitani x you#haitani ran#ran haitani#ran haitani x reader#tokyo manji gang#sanzu x reader#sanzu scenarios#sanzu headcanons#sanzu x y/n#bonten sanzu#bonten x you#bonten x y/n#bonten x reader#bonten#bonten rindou#rindou x y/n#rindou x reader#tokyo revengers rindou#haitani brothers#rindou haitani
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I've got this new tattoo, it reminds me of you
Hi!! Welcome to my fic for Keefitz Week 2023! Thank you so much to Summer (@when-wax-wings-melt) and Avery (@skylilac) for hosting this!! Tragically, I did not finish all of the chapters in time, so keep an eye out!
Read on ao3 here!!
A mix of the prompts, hence the. multichap part.
Keefe Sencen was a maker of bad decisions. Quite frequently, as his friends loved to remind him. In his freshman year of college, his (former) best friend Fitz Vacker had suggested being roommates for their second year. Keefe had enthusiastically agreed.
But then they’d had a falling out over the summer. And he’d forgotten that they’d put in a request to room together. So there he was: Keefe Sencen, 19 years old, clutching a box (that had all of his decorations) as he stared at Fitz. Fitz who’d changed since July, skin darker and freckles more prominent. And fuck. His hair now had a teal streak that matched the colored contacts he wore. Keefe fought back the blush, and gave him a nervous grin.
“Hey, Fitz.”
“Keefe.”
“Keefe! Hey, how’s your summer been?” Thank god for Biana. If she noticed anything wrong, she didn’t say anything, just looping an arm around his shoulders to ruffle his hair.
“Pretty good! You?”
She shrugged, pale cream shirt contrasting beautifully with her skin. “Alright.” She had a dark red streak in her curls, matching Fitz’s. “We went to the beach a lot. Speaking of which! You should come with us on Saturday! There’s one super close, and I think everyone else is free!”
“I’ll clear my schedule.”
“Clear what? You don’t do anything!”
“Hey! I’ll have you know I am a very busy man—”
She cut him off with a laugh, eyes scrunching up from her grin. “Mhm, sure. Anyway, Fitz, you’re all good, yeah?”
He looked up from where he was putting books on his shelf. “Yep. See you later.”
“Have fun! I love you, don’t be stupid.” Biana hugged her brother, and then darted back to give him a quick squeeze. “I’ll see you on Saturday!” She blows them each a kiss and flounces out of the room, shutting the door behind her.
“Right…I—I’m gonna go get my bedding.” Keefe fled, leaving the box behind. He grabbed the laundry bag and his pillow, and leaned back against his car. This was such a bad idea.
Back in their dorm, he unpacked, made his bed, and set up his lights. He’d texted Fitz the week before, the first time they’d spoken since…That Day. He pushed the discomfort aside, and focused on getting his lights to be perfect. They had a bulletin board in between the beds, and he had decided to put a set around it. The lights are star shaped, connected by thin copper wires. He risked a look at Fitz’s side. He had slipped out, claiming dinner plans with his parents. (Keefe called bullshit, but only internally. Alden and Della had gotten divorced in their 6th grade year, and the two tried to stay away from each other.)
He glanced at the black bookshelf Fitz had brought, already filled with books. Keefe noted with a slight pang of sadness that he hadn’t brought any of the books they’d annotated together. But it was fine. Totally fine.
He’d eventually settled into his bed, climbing up the ladder. Fitz had taken the lower bed. Something ached in his chest. Fitz remembered. He remembered how much Keefe hated sleeping close to the ground, so accustomed to curling up far above the floor.
The door slid open and shut, Fitz left in an exhausted slump. He eyed him. Fitz ran his hands through his hair, head against the door.
“…Fitz? Are you okay…?” Maybe dinner with his parents had actually happened. Fuck.
“Keefe? You’re here?”
He couldn’t ignore the sharp concern anymore and scrambled down the ladder. Fitz blinked at him blearily, faded tear tracks on his cheeks.
“Yeah. C’mon, let’s get you in bed, okay?” He fell into a similar routine, born of many years. Fitz had always been like this after extended time with Alden. (Keefe had promised to never let Alden near him again, after the last time this happened. Just another way he failed.)
Fitz stumbled after him, falling face down on his bed.
“Okay, I know. Do you mind if I help you change? You’re gonna complain if you wake up in jeans.”
He mumbled something, and gave a slight nod.
“Great!” Keefe rummaged for a pair of pajama pants and a soft pajama shirt—one that proclaimed him as the captain of their Academic Decathlon team, Vacker in bold letters across the back. He helped him into the pants and shirt, and pulled the soft comforter over him. “Sleep well.”
Keefe left the room. It was just so confusing. They fought, but that was his best friend, but they had screamed until they lost their voices, but he had grown up next to him, and just…ugh.
He wandered the halls for a while, familiarizing himself with the new dorms. He recognized some of the people, but Foxfire was massive. He followed one of the hallways, nearly tripping over someone. “Oh! My bad, wait. Dex…?”
The one in question blinked up at him, eyes wide. “Keefe? What are you doing here?”
“I live here. You?”
“Oh, I was helping Tam move in. I live in Onyx.”
Keefe had lived there last year, and he winced in sympathy. “Good luck, dude. You’ll need it.”
“Dex? Is something wrong?” Tam poked his head out, bangs redyed silver.
“Oh, no! I found Keefe though!” Dex gestured towards him, and Keefe smiled awkwardly. Things had always been…odd around Tam. There was some tension between the two of them, and he hadn’t been able to put his finger on it during high school, and he presumably wouldn’t be able to do it now.
“Right…who are you rooming with?”
His smile felt painted on. “Fitz.”
Tam’s eyebrows twitched up, and he shared a quick glance with Dex. “Mmm. Well. I’m going to finish setting up.” Tam went back inside. Dex gave him an apologetic smile.
“I’m gonna go too. You’re going to the thing on Saturday, right?”
“Yeah.”
“Awesome! See you then!” Dex gave him a cheerful grin and vanished into Tam’s room. Left alone, Keefe sighed and trudged back to his dorm. Fitz was asleep, and he changed into his own pajamas, keeping the lights off.
It’s barely 10, but god, he’s exhausted.
He woke up the next morning to Fitz’s incessant alarm clock, a familiar sound from junior high and high school sleepovers also known as when Keefe would be kicked out.
Keefe yawned, and it’s second nature to groan good naturedly at Fitz. “Dude, turn it off.” One loud smack later, and he’d drifted back off to sleep.
He was rudely awakened just a few minutes later. Fitz’s alarm blared again, and he let out a loud complaint.
“Up and at ‘em, Keefe! You need to get ready.” Curse Fitz and his incessant morning person-ness.
“Ugh. Fine, but I get the bathroom first.”
Fitz grumbled, but acquiesced, and Keefe slipped inside before he could. That was the nice thing about living in Ruby Hall was that they had attached bathrooms, unlike Onyx where you had to go to the end of the hall.
He showered as quickly as possible and went back to the main room, dressed in a pair of black pants and a pale green shirt. Fitz slid past him, not saying a word. He sidestepped the already growing pile of shoes to go to his desk, pushed neatly under his bed.
Keefe sat down, flicking the lights to his mirror. He pushed gel through his hair, making it artfully messy. Once he was done, he turned on his hairdryer, carefully drying his hair. Sophie had made fun of him whenever he was over for group sleepovers, as he had almost always borrowed hers. Well. It wasn’t his fault she didn’t really care about her appearance. He had standards!
The bathroom door opened and shut, signaling Fitz’s return. He didn’t turn to look, intent on getting his concealer blended out. The habit had started in high school, when he was regularly pulling all-nighters. And so there he was.
After that, he checked the time. The alarm went off at 7:30, and his first class was at 9, just down the road, in the Topaz Fine Arts Center. As the name suggested, Topaz housed all of the fine arts, other than the auditorium. (That was next door, known as the Gemstone Theater.) It was just now 8:30, and if he hurried, he could swing by the coffee shop for a quick breakfast.
“Okay, bye Fitz, see you!” He grabbed his backpack and rushed out. He didn’t bother getting his car, instead running down the road to the coffee shop.
“Oh! Keefe, hey! Haven’t seen you in a while,” Marella enthused.
“Hey, Marella! Can I—”
“Large iced mocha and sausage egg sandwich?”
“Yep! Thank you!” He paid her, before sliding to the pick up counter. Linh brought over his order, giving him a gentle smile. “Good morning, Keefe.”
“Hey, Linh! How was your summer?”
“It was good. You’re coming Saturday, yes?”
“Mhm! I’ll see tomorrow morning, probably.”
“Good. Have a good class!”
“Thanks, Linh! Bye!” He dashed out the door, clutching his coffee. His first class of the day was with Prof. Palmore. She taught graphic design, and generally didn’t care if students ate in her class, especially since it went from 9 to 11:30.
Keefe waved at a few students he recognized, before entering Topaz. It was nice to be back. Quietly he walked down the hall, making sure to not disturb the other classrooms. Most of the campus generally didn’t care, but he’d seen someone cry from too much noise during the second week last year. Generally, it was just a good idea to not bother people.
Prof. Palmore’s door was open, the woman in question sitting behind her desk. She didn’t have a typical lecture hall, instead setting up shop in the computer lab.
“Good morning, Keefe.”
“Hey, Prof! How are you?”
“I’m doing well. How about you?”
“Pretty good! Still waiting for the caffeine to kick in.”
She smiles at him, and he grins back. “Well, why don’t you go ahead and pick a seat? We’ll be jumping right in this year, since this class is solely for recurring students.”
He nods and takes his seat. Other students slowly trickled in, taking seats around the computer lab. He’s in the back corner, at his favorite computer. Most everyone sticks to the middle and up, but he’d found this spot last year. Sue him, he was attached.
Sophie dropped into the seat next to him, clutching a massive container of coffee. She looked exhausted, eye bags ever present.
“Good morning!”
“Don’t talk to me.”
She had been taking classes here since high school, testing into the dual credit programs. Plus, their graphic design class always ended with the class here, so you could start your second year of the course as a freshman.
He took another sip of his coffee and watched as she upended a can of Monster into it. “Soph, it’s day one.”
She didn't respond.
His next class was at two, so he swung by to a little hole in the wall diner. Known as The Canteen, it served the best pasta he’d ever had. Inside, one of the workers from last year was there. Ophelia gave him a wide grin, reaching over to give him an elbow bump. “It’s the Keefester! How’ve you been?”
“I’ve been good! Definitely looking forward to some more of your pesto chicken.”
She snorts and motions him to follow her. She seats him at his table (again, one of his favorites), and pulls out her notepad. “So. Water, pesto and chicken pasta?”
“Yep! You know me so well,” he laughs and bats his eyelashes. She rolls her eyes playfully and saunters off. He messes around on his phone while he waits, texting back and forth with Biana. She sends him a snap, making half a heart with her fingers. He snaps her back, making the other half. His food arrives a few minutes later and he digs in.
It’s just as good as he recalls, and soon he’s paying for his meal. His next class—Calculus—is in Peridot, down by the library. The “core” buildings (science, math, english, history) form a loose ring around it, and it’s…fairly common to see someone run from a building to the library and back again.
He refills his water bottle inside and double checks the room number. It’s taught by a…Professor Glade, so that should be fun.
Keefe walks in, smiles at the teacher, and goes to sit down. It’s filling up fast, and he makes a note to arrive early to get a good seat. They just go over the syllabus and he makes idle chatter with the person next to him. Their name is Sage, they have bright pink and black box braids, and quite possibly the funniest person he’s ever met. (Excluding himself, of course.)
They exchange numbers and he waves as he leaves, intent on going back to his dorm. He needs to wrap up an assignment for his graphic design class, properly go over the syllabi he got, and draft up a schedule with Fitz.
He makes it back to his dorm, relocks the door and kicks his shoes off. At his desk, he pulls out his highlighters and the syllabus from Calc.
A little past 5, Fitz falls through the door. Okay, not exactly, but definitely close enough. He looks murderous.
Keefe quickly looks back down. Before summer break, he would have watched. But now…he goes back to reading, making small notes in the margins. Sophie had gifted him a copy of the three books of the Pentecost & Parker series, and he thinks he has solved it when their door bursts open again.
It’s Tam, who throws a bag at Keefe. “Here’s your stuff.” He leaves just as quickly as he came, door slamming behind him.
“What was that about?”
“I asked for my stuff back. I guess it works.” The two of them had had a…less than stellar breakup over spring break last year. It had been messy. And dramatic. And hella awkward.
He opened the bag, pulling out the books and the hoodie. Plus a pair of sweatpants that he’d completely forgotten about. His phone went off and he cursed. “I have to get to the tattoo parlor. I’m working till closing tonight, so I’ll try to not wake you up.”
He bolted out the door, down to his car. It’s a quick drive, and soon he’s pulling into the lot. Renee gives him a grin from behind the counter, wearing a sleeveless shirt that shows off the tattoos on her arms.
“Hey, Renee! How was your summer?”
“It was great! You?”
“It was alright. Do I have anything scheduled?”
She flips through the logbook. “Two. A mother and daughter here for a basic ear piercing and two people for noses. They’re together. Walkins?”
“That’ll work.”
She nods, reaching over to get the phone as it rings. “Hi, this is Sea of Ink, how can I help you today?” He hands her a pen and the legal pad, and she gives him a distracted smile. “Mhmmm. We do have a piercer, yes. We’re open all evening, but he won’t be available from 6 to 7. How does 8 sound?” A pause. “Excellent! We’ll see you then!”
“What do they want?”
“Helix. Anyway, I’ll be taking my 15 at 7. Do you want me to bring dinner for you?”
“Ooh, yeah sure. How ‘bout Jerry’s?”
“Sounds awesome, I’ll text you my order.” He heads to the back, going to wash his hands and get his supplies.
It’s a fairly uneventful time. Closing shift is always really chill, especially once Victoria arrives. Her bangs are still white, but she’s dyed her hair a dark blue, and gotten an industrial. It has a rainbow sheen, to no one’s surprise.
They don’t have many appointments, and Victoria has a firm no walkins policy. Renee hasn’t ever had a problem with telling someone to fuck off if they disrespect that, so they’re all set.
At ten to eight, he’s sitting on the loveseat, feet up on the seat. He’s reading again, this one a gift from Della. It’s part of a box set of Blood of Olympus series. This time, it’s the Mark of Athena. He’s afraid to write his little notes on the page, so instead he has a stack of sticky notes and tabs.
Renee is sitting behind the reception counter, a textbook cracked open. Victoria lounges in one of the armchairs, drawing on her iPad. The bell rings as someone walks inside, and he flinches as he looks up. Fitz is here, looking ridiculously out of place.
“Hi, I’m Fitz Vacker. I work at the new flower shop, you know, the one down the road? It’s called Bouquet Boutique? Anyway, I wanted to give you a bouquet, if you want it.”
Renee hurries over to take the bouquet, which is made up of pale blue and cream flowers. “Thank you so much!! I’m Renee Bright, and that’s Victoria Parsons. Welcome to Sea of Ink, and we offer a discount to shops on the road. Oh, and that’s one of our piercers, Keefe Sencen!”
“I thought you said you had to work…?”
“This is my job…?”
The two stare at each other, before Fitz flushes and turns away. “I should head back, but it was nice meeting you!”
“Same here! See you around, Fitz!” Renee waves cheerfully before she turns to him. “How do you know him?”
Victoria lets out an incredulous laugh. “Dude, you can’t just ask him why they know each other, oh my god.”
She holds her hands up. “That came out wrong! All I meant was that he doesn’t seem like your…type.”
“My…type?”
“Yeah! I mean, he’s not exactly the kind of person you typically date, yeah?”
“I…we aren’t together!” He can feel his cheeks heating up.
“Oh. I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to assume—”
He waves her off. “It’s fine. I should get ready for my next appointment, okay?”
She nods, lips pursed. His client comes in though, clearly used to this. He does it quickly, adding to the piercings slowly climbing up their ears.
And then he stays until nine, reading and joking around with Renee and Victoria. And that’s that. Rinse, repeat, huh?
-------
Thank you so much for reading!!! I hope you liked it! This has been so much fun to write!
#keefitz week 2023#keefitz#Alternate Universe - College/Universityminor rivals to friends to loversSoulmark AUDay At The Beachband auAlternate Universe - Flower Shop#college au#minor enemies to lovers...? its more of awkward pseudo friends to best friends#soulmarks#flower shop & tattoo parlor au
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ACOTAR characters on Boxing Day rank?
Halloween, you mean? I just explained that I was an ignorant, shoe-less American. @the-lonelybarricade tried to educate me, it's like second Christmas? Sorry anon, I wish we could be more cultured. But we can't.
17. Amren- absolutely will not hand candy to children
16. Azriel- went too hard on the haunted themed yard and now no one will approach the drive way. Doesn't help his costume is horrifying.
15. Mor- Sets up a booth at the edge of the driveway charging $3 for spiked apple cider for parents only. HEAVY pours, these parents don't realize they're fucked until their kids are running amok. Only tricks tonight.
14. Nesta- forces children to share a joke before handing one piece of candy, doesn't laugh if the joke isn't funny. A lot of shamed children that night.
13. Jurian- Buys massive bag of candy, eats it himself in his living room while refusing to answer the doorbell. He's not handing out $16 worth of candy to CHILDREN
12. Tamlin- Doesn't dress up or decorate yard. Traditional triangle eyes pumpkin. Did buy candy but it's smarties. Porch light off by 9pm.
11. Feyre- Projector on the lawn playing Nightmare Before Christmas. Family costume with something cute and unoffensive that definitely reminds all the other moms that she is still hot and so is her husband.
10. Cassian- Sitting in middle of the street in lawn chair with other dads, surrounded by fire pit. Set up a massive table with candy, doesn't care how much the children take because he has POUNDS of it in the garage. It will all be gone by the end of the night
9. Gwyn- "oh my gosh, what are you supposed to be?" all night. Active interest in every costume she sees, giving out candy left and right. Runs out too quickly and has to rob Cassian for more.
8. Emerie- Speakers with halloween themed jams in her yard. Fistfuls of candy straight from plastic cauldron. Wore a witch costume, looks very cute.
7. Lucien- Halloween party at his house. All his friends are smashed. Doorbell rings, watches his wife dresses as slutty poison Ivy give a bunch of toddlers candy. Someone pukes in an expensive vase.
6. Vassa- trick or treating with everyone else. What do you mean this is only for children? Has the SPIRIT of a child, give her the fucking candy, Nesta.
5. Helion- King of the slutty halloween costume. Absolutely came to that party to ruin lives. Shots in the kitchen, accidentally pukes in a vase.
4. Tarquin- fun haunted maze for children that is absolutely age appropriate. Shirtless costume has all the moms lingering at the edge of the yard (INCLUDING FEYRE GIRL WE CAN SEE YOU)
3. Rhysand- somehow always has a beer in hand? Massive halloween light display. Pumpkins carved into super neat shapes. Fog machine has turned yard into a spooky graveyard. Part of the a couple costume, watching Tarquin next door VERY closely.
2. Elain- Slutty poison Ivy costume UNMATCHED. Bought full-sized candy bars in bulk, says nothing when she sees repeat children hitting up her door. Best halloween party on the block, spooky halloween treats on theme and yet so delicious. Understands Halloween is equal parts being hot and being nice to kids.
1. Eris Vanserra- King of the pumpkin patch himself. Appropriate spooky front yard, just enough to make people wary but not so horrifying they won't come up. Full-sized candy IF they put one of his goodest boys ever. Handing out shots to parents. Yard a Halloween-wonder land of pumpkins and ghosts. Absolute best night of the year for Eris, who will deny he enjoys it at all. Closes up shop around 11 to show his brother how to have a good time, wakes up on the front lawn cheek pressed to the grass.
#sorry anon#but halloween is the superior holiday#also sorry i skipped the list for this one#i will be working backwards for the rest i swear
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Verona (Storm Ghoul)
Here's a lil information about my ghoul oc named Verona.
Verona is one of the first storm ghoul that ever summoned in the Ministry. Their element is quite confusing, so the Ministry classify them as a multighoul.
Storm ghouls are not that common, their element is a mixture of air and water. It makes them could control both air and water. They are less likely to be able to produce storms unless they get provoked.
Verona is considered as the younger ghouls, and they are still learning in the ministry. Verona is not the smartest one in the class, they are somewhere in the middle? Their strongest traits are they have a HUGE curiosity, so they would never stop learning.
They are 1.78 meters (5'8 ft) tall and has a lean body, but surprisingly strong legs. Verona unintentionally trains their legs by holding themselves up not to tremble (or even fall) when they're controlling the storm that they've made, and it's not easy!
Verona also has striking white hair and super light grey irises. Their irises is not as white as the Papas'. Their skin tone is medium to dark, and have wavy hair. These traits made others find Verona so easily, but wait until when it comes to raining season because they could blend easily through the howling wind and pouring rain.
Verona has two little fangs, and they deeply admire those sharp teeth. Verona is often seen sharpening their fangs in their spare time. "For weapons!" they said.
Their horns are actually fully white, but as they grow older, the tip start to get darker and spreading more and more invading the white parts. Someday it would be fully black.
Verona is a literal ghoul-shaped cat: they use their claws a lot than their element to defend themselves. And they hiss a lot when there's a stranger who comes way too close.
Verona is not the most talkative one, but when they speak, their words are deep. Sarcastic, even. They feel more comfortable speaking through drawings, sketches, a mind map even. They talk using their hand a lot to describe things.
Verona is a big thinker which makes them pretty idealistic, but on the other side, they're also impulsive.
Verona's room is not the most neat one, but they surely put things in boxes based on their function. Stationaries, books, enamel pins, etc.
Verona's favorite color is Capri Blue.
About Verona and the other ghouls... Verona loves to be around water and air ghouls. Sometimes they hang around the earth ghouls too. They have mixed feelings towards fire ghouls, Verona thinks fire ghouls are cool but some of them are so cocky. Verona had a fight with a fire ghoul, earning them a scar across their right eye.
The pictures below show Verona when the first time they were summoned, and Verona now.
For Verona and the band ghouls... Verona has a big fat crush on Rain. This is why Verona chooses to be a bassist, the other reason is because they think guitar is just too confusing. They just want to scream cry throw up whenever they see Rain. Swiss, the master of reading people's body, noticed this and teased Verona about it nonstop.
As stated before, Verona doesn't have the best relationship with Dewdrop. Despite that, Verona had some training session with Dewdrop, creating the most terrifying disaster of all time: fiery storm lingering on top of the ministry. Dewdrop laughed manically when it happened, while Verona was laughing but also being scared to death. What if the Papas or Sister is angry? (Spoiler: they did). Verona still respect Dewdrop because they don't want to get burned by the fiery demon (Verona calls him that).
Mountain calls Verona his 'little one' in brotherly way. Verona goes to Mountain's garden often.
Verona always up for a talk with Aether, they think Aether is so wise and they see him as a fatherly figure. Sadly Aether seems always busy going around the ministry, managing this or that, also helping the Papas.
The ghoulettes LOVES Verona so fucking much, especially Cumulus and Cirrus. These three share the same element which is air, so the ghoulettes are Verona's mentor. Cumulus is that kind and loving, soft mentor while Cirrus is that straightforward and assertive mentor. Verona loves them both!
Sunshine is helping her girlfriends to teach Verona by putting on as much sunlight as she could and tell Verona to cover it with their storm. This training enhances Verona's strength on managing their element.
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Homesick
Google Docs Link
“C’moooonnnnnnnn Rip, you promised me you’d go!!” Meyers tailed after you, tickets firm in her grasp. You set the stack of boxes you’d been tasked with moving down gently, before turning to her with a sigh.
“Mey, babes, I’m busy. Can’t Nem go with ya?” Your words did little to appease the rust. She shook her head adamantly and grabbed your sleeve.
“The venue’s in a real sketch part of town, and it’s super late. Nem doesn’t like staying out late and- and- you can’t just let me go ALONE! It’s scary out there!” Her grip on your sleeve tightens with determination. You sigh again, and give in, as always.
You knew this venue. It’d been sweeps since you’d been there last, though you were the performer then. The smell was best described as nostalgic. The twang of alcohol and bite of smoke hung heavy in the air as you followed Meyers inside. She held onto your hand, despite your suggestions. You didn’t want to be mistaken for a couple…but that didn’t seem to be an issue now. Everyone was focused on their own little friend groups. You let the smaller rustblood guide you towards the wall. You found yourself distracted by the stage crew, missing most of what Meyers was talking to you about once you both settled. Conversations grew in volume around you while mic checks were done and equipment was moved.
“-the band’s like this one cerulean! He’s a blueblood, just like you, isn’t that cool??”
You nod quietly. Sure, cool. There wasn’t an opening band, which you thought was a little odd. But this was supposedly a smaller show than normal. Maybe a show to revive the venue? You’d heard through the grapevine that this place was dying. You wondered how Meyers got hold of the tickets. Your thoughts continued to race and wander. It's no wonder you missed the lights dimming. It wasn’t even the applause that brought you back to reality, no. It was the vibrations in the wall as the music started to play.
Your eyes knew exactly where to go. Trained to identify the bassist and ignore the star of the show. Bohwie, was it? Who knew! You focused on the bassist, focused on feeling each note he played. The rumble of the wall was a drug like no other. You knew, somehow, what each note felt like. You could tell when a note was missed, when a mistake was made. The nostalgia was better in the music than in the horrid smell. Each note rumbled inside your core. It pierced your soul. You felt like you had a beating heart again, revived with the music.
And this was exactly why you didn’t want to go. The bittersweet feeling of belonging, of the puzzle pieces settling into their places again. It was healing a piece of you that you didn’t want healed. You weren’t fucking ready for this wound to heal. Scars or no scars, arms or no arms. Healing hurt more than loss.
Loss was realizing Home wasn’t a place you could return to. It wasn’t the hive you’ve lived in for so long, with your oversized lusus, decorated in scattered lego pieces. Home was not a person. Your kismesis, the one who took this away from you, he wasn’t home. Home couldn’t be found in the boxes you moved every day, or the legos you bide your time with. It wasn’t in the old fashioneds you downed to forget where Home really was. Home was the fire being rekindled in your chest. Home wasn’t something you could touch, but something you felt ignite like a match as soon as the music started. It pierced your soul, forcing itself and life into your lungs. You didn’t want to come because you knew this feeling would return, and it would be painful. Your arms didn’t need muscle to have the muscle memory of playing. The feeling of plucking strings to play bass lines you had written on the shitty couch beside your best friends would never truly leave you. Did you really think it would? Did you really think you could escape the very thing that was so woven into your entire being that the very idea of being separated from it drove you into a sweeps-long depression? You had been homesick for so long, when home was right beside you. It’s call had been falling on deaf ears for too long.
You felt tears well up in your eyes. For a brief moment, you considered stepping outside for a smoke and cry break. But you couldn’t bear to miss a single moment of this. You knew this was the answer. You missed your bass, you missed the adrenaline. You missed the rumble of the drumset in your feet and the ringing in your ears after the shows. You missed the late night band chats, you missed feeling part of something. You missed your bass. You missed your friends. You missed the scene. You missed your bass. You missed yourself. Half of your heart yearned to reach out and try again, knowing full well the music had never left your tired bones. The other half broke, knowing you’d given it all up, and there was truly no going back. Home was there beside you all along, and it hurt to acknowledge that you’d shut yourself out.
Your train of thought was scattered as Meyers grabbed your sleeve. You instinctively put a smile on your face as you look at her. She mouths “are you okay?” or, maybe she said it, you’re not certain. It’s incredibly loud. You’re still and quiet, thinking hard about her question. Her eyes scan your face for any sort of answer.
Your heart still hurt, freshly broken once again, but the empty homesickness was gone, finally, it was gone. Your smile grows with a confident nod. Yeah, you were okay. You’d be okay later, too. You felt alive for the first time in sweeps. Home wasn’t something you had to long for anymore. It was beside you all along.
You’ve waited long enough.
It’s time to go home, Riptid.
#riptid canuis#meyers result#ghost.art#drabbles#no proofreading no test run no nuthin#it gets posted rn
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this is so helpful, christ.
I think im assisted by the fat my thoughts nowadays are less 'what ifa' and more... 'clockwork orange', thoughts that obviously arent real but that devastate me through their repulsivity alone.
ideally I'd hack that function of my brain and memories affected by it off and let that shard of me toil while I rest, recuperate, and then take it to get that whole thing fixed and ideally reintegrate that shard of myself? It would be a painful existence, but like... idk. if I knew it was not endless, and if I got to see me resting in a way I can't, I think I'd be able to manage?
I don't know what other options are available to me, but if its... an option, and if it will let me heal that part of myself and let the rest of me get to be a person, it seems worth pursuing? Idk where to start or if my preconceptions abt this are all wrong though.
again this is.... really a lot. it's either a light at the end of the tunnel, or relief that I'm not missing a way out I could've sought out. tysm.
they really can get quite disgusting, i know and i sympathize, sometimes it feels like having the worst fucked up horror movies just playing in your head 24/7 with no off button and it is completely understandable to be horrified and disgusted by them. i'm somewhat desensitized most of the violent/sexual ones these days because i decided to just. do art about it. oddly enough coping with fiction isn't just for the folks with ptsd, ahah.
obviously, you know your mind best, and you know yourself and your situation best. expectation and intent do have an effect on how these things turn out, even if there will always be things you didn't expect to show up. if you believe it would be compartmentalizing yourself to help you heal and rest, not just shoving them down into a box that never gets opened (by you, at least) again, that is a different story entirely.
and. well. just in general, even if it doesn't work out, trying sometimes is better than doing nothing. it really seems like you're at the end of your ability to cope alone and frankly even a 'bad' coping mechanism is still a coping mechanism if it's keeping you going.
i can try to rustle up some resources for creating headmates if you want/need me to. it's not something i talk about often because of the sysmeds but the r/tulpa subreddit is where we figured out we were plural, and we do have a 'tulpa' even if he doesn't really use the term anymore.
the other thing i would recommend you look into (or if you need me to do some googling, i will - frankly i'll probably have a look anyway for my own sake) is something called Exposure Response Prevention therapy. obviously these are 'best' done with a therapist/psychologist/someone who knows what they're doing, but sometimes just studying the thing can help to a degree if that isn't an option.
from what i understand ERP is considered the gold standard treatment for OCD currently, and i have seen anecdotal evidence to suggest it helps with intrusive thoughts.
other than that i just want to say that i am so proud of you for reaching out, and for taking steps to try and make things better for yourself. both of those things are so hard to do, especially with OCD brain
i can't promise super quick responses or that i'll have answers for everything, but our ask box is always open if you have other questions
#sickened answers#current nightmare; dmitri#sorry for the wait for a response waking up is not kind to our brain#takes a while for words to become useful
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10 characters, 10 fandoms, 10 tags (I don't know 10 people)
@reinathevocaloid at me again and we boxing.
1. Morrigan: a witch stranded in the woods who goes out and explored the world with two dopes on a quest to save the world. She tries to use the hero for her own gains but ends up falling for them and allowing herself to feel emotions. Nothing I love more than that.
2. Aoi Todo: a man after my own heart, literally declares the MC his brother after he proclaimed "I like a girl with a big ass, like Jennifer Lawrence" how could I not fall in love with him?
3. Nekomaru Nidai: "Eat well, shit well!" I have the sense of humor of a child, so a character going around yelling about how they need to take a shit is just wonderful to me. Also the entire game he never puts himself in the spot light, he always tries to help everyone around him be the best they can be and that's something i try to do myself.
4. Ryuji Sakamoto: like ryuji, I am also best friend to a main character. 😎 Me and ryuji might honestly be the same person, trouble makers, emotionally traumatized by the adults around us, I also used to like track before I hurt my ankle pretty bad. But fuck atlus for putting in that homophobic part in p5.
5. Rock lee: his entire character is that he's worthless because he doesn't know ninjutsu, so he works his ass off to better his own skills without giving up. Best character in the entire series, or top 5, and he gets done super dirty in Shippuden.
6. Usopo: honestly one of the funniest characters in all of anime. When making a comic relief character, people should base it off usopp. Probably has one of the best personal growth stories in anime as well! I love a liar.
7. Arataka Reigen: I honestly think I just like comedy relief characters. Apart from being a total bastard man that just wants to make some money. There is a side of him that genuinely wants to help mob, or at the very least not see him become an evil psychic.
8. Shulk: literally has the best scream in any video game, don't @ me.
9. Ashoka Tano: literally the only female Jedi to get any real love or attention in the entire series. She's bad ass, doesn't put up with anyone's shit, and refuses to be walked over, even by people she considers family.
10. Anya the nerd: usually the main character in most games, whatever the female equivalent of a hiimbo is, that's Anya. Incredibly intelligent, passionate, never takes showers, always a nerd. A really cool bean, and she can't see bridges and constantly ask why it's raining, but I couldn't imagine not knowing a nerd like that.
#dragon age#juju kaisen#persona 5#anime memes#ask post#one piece#usopponepiece#star wars#xenoblade#mob psycho#danganronpa 2#naruto
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hey hi hey! what are your favourite songs + episodes?? :D
Putting the episodes first because I decided to go on a music nerd tangent later on. And honestly, I don't know what my favorite episodes would be (I like them all), so I think I'll just talk about of all of them.
Also this response got long as fuck so I'm doing a readmore.
Creativity: Man the puppets from back then are interesting to look back on XD. Mad at Sketchpad for trying to kill Yellow Guy's creativity (even though other teachers tried to straight-up kill him). That boy's clown painting was good! ;-; Also am I the only one who keeps rewinding to when Duck says his favorite color is red? He sounds so enthusiastic about it! Then the main thing of the episode, I interpreted it as conveying that we're told to be creative, but only within certain boundaries. This also reminds me, the fandom has some trouble characterizing Sketchpad. @/gnomeniche has a post about it somewhere too, but basically Sketch is a straight-edge jerk and just because they're nonviolent doesn't make them nice. Aaaaand of course there were those people who made them all murder-happy. They're the exact kind of people Sketch would despise, I'm afraid XD.
Time: I just realized I have very little to say about that episode 'cause it was a pretty straightforward one, but it had a nice song and the fish joke was funny, so was the "It's time to go to time." It also took me a while to realize that Red decayed too (I think), I thought his ass was really long lived and just kept growing more and more hair. The ending is really weird and I still don't know what exactly to make of it, we know they're in a simulation by now but yk.
Love: Just an overall nice episode, the friendship moments were sweet. As I say later, I like the song, and I refuse to ever, ever call Shrignold a butterfly. That is a baby pigeon always and forever. Probably the most horrifying part of the episode was the salmonella /j. Also, I believe in the Shrignold was Michael theory, not really sure why they'd just make that weird story up unless it related to something XD. And I think it ties in with a LoveBird fanfiction that was recently started, think it only has one chapter as of now but I'm enjoying it, first chap is from Shrig's pov (it doesn't explicitly mention Michael or anything tho).
Computer (or whatever it's called): Colin is best boy goddamnit and I talk abt this later but he did nothing wrong. Song fucks too ofc. I also love how done with life Red is the whole time, and the "wow, look, nothing!" Unfortunately I don't really have much to say abt the episode, I just like it.
Health/Food: Oh boy. This episode. What I would consider the only scary DHMIS episode (sorry, the rest are just interesting). The way Duck is so scared the whole time breaks my heart and makes me fear for him, the Steak Guy creeps me the ever-loving fuck out, and the music. Okay. So the lyrics are super weird, often contradictory or just plain wrong in a way they aren't in any other episode, which is super off-putting, and the rest of the time they're just obviously incomplete. You're like, what the hell are these mfs doing??? And the audio breaks when the phone calls come through, with the creepy-ass ambiance, it's so unsettling! Audio is a key piece if you're trying to scare me. DHMIS 5 certainly suceeds in that. And of course the actual stuff that happens. Oh my god. Best episode if you're a real horror guy.
Dreams: Intro is heartbreaking of course, poor Yellow Guy, but what a power move for him to just turn the light back off when the teacher first shows up! It didn't work but it was still a power move! Red Guy is such a nerd XD, and that guy who was like "Well, that's rude. No clothes" well okay then, maybe should've kept your clothes on bro. (Also wtf is with their office building why does the staircase look like that). The presence of the teachers extends to outside the simulator, as seen with the mic and box radio thing. That's interesting. And people don't tend to notice this, but Red Guy himself popped on the screen briefly when he was going through buttons on the thingy. Man the lore implications. (Also a very merry piss off to that one guy who theorized that Duck showing up on the screen was a sign that he wasn't real and that he's replacable XD.) Roy was certainly creepy here, but my bigger question is, doesn't stretching like that hurt his arm? Oh and also the rebooted guys are cute <3
Jobs: I kin Red Guy rn. I too wish I was doing Nothing Day. But back to the point, the autism in this episode was so high. Someone else pointed out it was a lot like masking, and yeah that's definitely what Yellow and Red were doing HARDCORE. Also I don't really ship Yellow x Claire partially for this reason, I just don't trust that Yellow was able to be himself at all just due to the work environment and stuff. (Also Yellow's aro.) I don't hate the ship ofc, that's just my thoughts on it. And Duck in the elevator, that part was great. Having him be presented with a stupid emotion chart and be like I don't know these emotions and knock it over was also an autism moment, as was being spoken over and told what your feelings are for you. That Stress song was stressful for sure and I felt bad for Duck the whole time, and I do not like the Carehound bc it brainwashed Duck. I am protective of my boy Duck. Anyway, at the end of the episode, Duck and the gang got a pound. In the next episode, when Larry goes on his little spiel about what happens after we die, he says they get a pound every time they get it right. I guess they only got it right for one episode, huh? (I guess it's also the only episode aside from 6 where the teacher didn't fucking die.)
Death: Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa. These guysssss. They can't live without each other! They love each other! Also I have beef with Coffin for the exact same reason I have beef with Sketchpad (stifling Yellow's creativity), but Coffin has a soothing voice so I don't care. I've also made a post abt how Duck was affected by the episode that I'm not gonna repeat here. I would say poor Stain Edwards, but like...I'm protective of Duck and I really don't want them replacing my boy so I kinda fear them. Memories is gut-wrenching ofc. And Big Day is the song that actually led to me getting into the series.
Family: *foams at the mouth* I'm going to hit Red's family with a truck and the creepy family with a truck and decide what to do with Roy but probably hit him with at least half a truck. (Partly joking, ik the twins are kids and there's prob something more to them.) Something I never see being talked about but I really enjoy is how the FAULBCHDT song is foreshadowing for the fact that the twins and their family aren't actually a real family. Still mad that Red felt like he had to apologize for being happy. The fact that Toddney managed to hypnotize Yellow Guy to sleep makes me wonder what the actual fuck is wrong with these two, and the fact that after the others leave Yellow Guy keeps asking where they are hurts me, also shows how he's got his awareness on. I am So Confused on how to feel about Roy at the end of this! I'm so confused about how to feel abt him in general actually! God I need to see him with batteries so bad.
Friendship: Wow. I dislike Warren so much, so like congratulations for making a well-written hatable character! (I don't hate him tho, for me a prerequisite for actually hating a fictional character is bad writing which isn't present here.) So happy about the Colin cameo in this episode, he's so cute (also he was adorable in Dreams but I forgot to mention that earlier). And the implications of Yellow Guy's maiden name being Rat-Eyes, that implies that his last name was never Gribbleston, which makes me think that Lesley's last name was passed on to the kid, which makes her full name Lesley Rat-Eyes, which I find hilarious. I have to wonder if the trio would've actually taken Warren to a restaurant style meal if he hadn't fucked up. Probably not. But it's nice(?) that the other two tricked Warren into helping anyways. Also the part that truly made me dislike Warren? Him being a dick to Shy Imaginary Older Brother. For reading slow and having difficulty with passwords. Very similar reason to why Warren was "defending" Yellow Guy. Warren doesn't care about jackshit, he just wants to be a hero and be fucking worshipped for doing...whatever the hell it is. Bro would totally bully me. Songs are good, fight scene is hilarious.
Transport: Absolutely amazing episode, I don't even know if I could explain because I feel like so many people have done so better than me, but anyways the end shattered my heart to pieces, actually a lot of the episode did, these poor fucking puppets. Honestly I'm really tired rn tho and pretty much everyone and their dog has talked about this ep so I'm not gonna explain further.
Electricity: Also an amazing episode, I was rewatching at some point and you can find it through the "#i'm rewatching episode 6 rn" tag (I'll tag this post with it so you can find it more easily), and I put a lot of thoughts in there, but I didn't say anything about Lesley, that funky woman. Her laughs at things that aren't funny and doesn't give straight answers swag is beginning to captivate me. It's making me wonder if she's the reason for this series' more comedic tone in comparison to the webseries. Also very curious what's above her ofc. I'd love to have a conversation with her and try to get an answer to literally anything.
I like every song from DHMIS. One of my favorites from the webseries would have to be the one from Love because it's super soothing when you ignore the context (and has the most actual singing which is important for me as a choir nerd), and also has an interesting chord progression with the frequency of its C augmented chords. The other fave from the webseries would have to be Computer (idek if that's the right name XD), because Colin is my favorite teacher, he's my special little guy who did nothing wrong and also the song is a whole vibe. Honestly I don't think he meant to harm anyone. I mean, ig there's debate on if anyone did, but Colin specifically? Definitely not.
As for the TV series, I really like the Electricity somg because first of all Electracey is my second favorite teacher, and second of all it's a banger, especially with the electric guitar parts. Plus everyone's just vibing! It's nice! I like the FAULBCHDT song because it's funny (I love how Duck is like wtf is this the whole time) and also vocal-heavy, the Worm In Your Brain song because it's rlly soothing, and Duck's Family song because it tears my heart out and eats it every time! Duck baby! He feels the need to pretend that he isn't lonely and that he's tough even when nobody's around, dearest it's okay to say you miss them we all know you love those other guys.
Side tangent, there are a total of four songs in DHMIS that aren't in what I consider a childlike key (just a key that many children's songs are in) (which I consider to be F major to A major on the circle of 5ths (so F, C, G, D, and A major)). These songs are the Stress song, which the melody is so weird that I don't want to bother pinning down a key (I think that's intentional bc it's ironically supposed to be a stressful song), but is definitely not in one of the earlier keys, the Memories song, which is in C major for part of it, but switches into what is likely C dorian (similar to C minor but with a natural 6th), but could also be G minor (probably not tho), the Worm In Your Brain song, in B major, and the Transport song, also in B major.
Aside from the Transport song, which is sung by an old man (so it makes sense for it to be in a less kiddish key), all the songs here have something to do with feelings, the Stress song with the feeling of, well, stress, Memories with grief, and Worm In Your Brain with anxiety and self-doubt. Also, all of these songs are from the new series. I feel like there's a connection to be made here but I'm sick and thus a bit stupid and can't explain it.
Holy shit this whole thing took like two hours to answer because I have chronic writes way too much and then gets distracted syndrome
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"WILMA". "WILMA". She was no stranger to that word, because not only was it her own first name, but also because her husband yelled it out at least a hundred times a day...for any number of different reasons.
It was different this time though. It wasn't Fred...her husband. It was a woman's voice...and she sounded frantic. It almost sounded like
"Betty?" she exclaimed as she opened the front door "what's the matter?...why are you crying?"
The Rubbles lived next door. Her husband Fred and Betty's husband Barney were best friends. They did EVERYTHING together...work, bowl, golf, and they even belonged to some lodge...although they would never discuss exactly what they did there in open company. They were out at the golf course today in fact. Barney and Betty had a son who had almost super human strength, so the guys would have him stand in front of them when they'd pretend to tee off, and he'd put them damn near on the green with one stroke.
But here at home, she invited Betty inside, and gave her time to compose herself enough to actually get complete words out. And when she could, she told Wilma how she had woken up the night before to find Barney not in their bed. She did hear him though...from the open window of all places. So she went outside and followed his voice to the house on the other side of theirs, and there through the open window, she saw him on top of the neighbor woman who had recently lost her husband in a quarry cave in.
"What am I going to do Wilma?" she asked "I can't leave him...there are no more open secretary positions in this town, so I wouldn't be able to support myself. And I can't confront him either, because then he'll probably never come to our bed at all."
Wilma excused herself momentarily to make sure that her daughter was still fast asleep. "What you're going to do" she told her upon returning "is exactly what he's doing. If he's going to cat around behind your back, then you should do the same to him. It certainly won't fix the core problem, but I can almost guarantee that you'll feel like less of a victim."
"Don't be ridiculous" she replied "the first man that I approach will run straight to him...and then the entire town will know about my dirty laundry." "Oh honey" Wilma told her "I don't think that you're thinking quite far enough out of the box...and speaking OF boxes..."
Without saying another word, Wilma reached around the back of her neck, and unfastened the one button that held the upper half of her dress to her body. As it fell to the ground, leaving her standing there in nothing but a pearl necklace, she told Betty that it didn't necessarily HAVE to be a man after all.
Betty just stared at her standing there naked. Her breasts weren't large, but they were a beautiful shape. Her stomach was washboard flat, and the thick tuft of hair down between her legs was every bit as red as that on her head.
Wilma looked back at Betty just as intently...waiting for any kind of response or reaction...which didn't take long. Almost as if the temperature had suddenly dropped in the house, two very noticeable protrusions presented themselves on the bodice of Betty's light blue dress.
Wilma approached her...and kissed her on the lips. Betty just stood there at first, stone still as all of the furniture, but then she began to kiss Wilma back...until their tongues were intertwined in the darkness of their mouths.
As Betty reached out for any part of Wilma's body that she could touch, Wilma unfastened that same button on her friend's dress...and pulled it off of her.
Wilma backed away now...to get a better look at this brand new Betty. She definitely had the larger breasts of the two of them, but the same flat stomach. And whereas the hair between Wilma's legs was firey red, Betty's bush was raven black.
"So tell me" Wilma said "Do you like always having your hair up so tightly?"
"Actually" Betty replied "No...but Barney does." "Well" Wilma continued "he also likes fucking the neighbor, so maybe he doesn't always know best." And with that, she unpinned Betty's hair and let it fall down to her shoulders.
She then took Betty by the hand and led her into the bedroom. "It's just that...neither one of us has a...you know" Betty said as Wilma motioned her to the foot of the bed. "Not to worry" Wilma replied...while walking over to her dresser "I've got something that will put whatever your sawed off husband is packing to shame."
Wilma turned back around now...with something in her hand. It was cylindrical...with a familiar cut shape on either end...and it was made of the smoothest stone that Betty had ever seen with her own two eyes.
She approached the bed...and kneeled down between Betty's legs...gently nudging her on to her back with a hand to the stomach...and began to slowly lick her pussy up and down.
Betty immediately reached down and ran her fingers through Wilma's hair...virtually destroying the perfect bun that hid just how long her locks actually were. Wilma began to consume her friend more voraciously now...licking her faster...and eventually working her tongue between Betty's sugary sweet labia.
As Wilma continued to baptise Betty in the saliva of another woman, she rose to her feet and began to lick her clitoris sharply in repeated upward motions. So taking the cue, Betty slowly backed up further onto the bed...taking great care as not to lose contact with Wilma's magnificent tongue.
Wilma followed her closely...with Betty's scorned pussy in her mouth...and that mysterious cylindrical object still in her hand...until Betty's head came to rest on that rock hard pillow behind her.
Wilma backed away now...and rose to her knees. Then...as Betty watched with curious intensity, Wilma placed that object down between her legs...running the tip of it up and down herself...until it glid into her...one entire half of it parting her like the red sea.
After a few moments of sexual exhibition, she pulled it completely out of herself, turned it around, and reinserted it. Then she leaned forward...with it protruding from her, and fed the half which still glistened with her own juices into her best friend.
She leaned directly over Betty now and began to work her hips back and forth, but she found that she was so wet herself that she couldn't properly grip the granite lady cock between them. So being the quick thinker that she was, she reached down again and repositioned it between her clenched thighs.
So here she was...in her own bed...fucking the woman who lived right next door. Betty began to moan louder, but being mindful of the sleeping baby in the next room, Wilma quickly put her hand over Betty's mouth and leaned in closer to her face.
That must have been a trigger of some sort, because Betty instantly placed her hands over her own breasts and squeezed them noticeably hard. "Does anybody fuck you better than I do?" Wilma asked as she penetrated Betty again and again. Betty shook her head no. "And don't you actually feel SORRY for that sad old widow who has to settle for your husband's meager little cock?" she continued. Betty shook her head yes. "Well then" she went on to say "you're going to let him KEEP fucking her, but as soon as you find him gone, you're going to come over here and get me before his side of the bed even cools down. Am I understood?" Betty shook affirmatively once more. "Good girl" Wilma told her "but the boys are going to be home soon....so it's time for you to cum for mama."
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The Baron In The Trees.
♫ Best of Indie 2011 on Spotify
What a July: I’ve felt terrible all month. The kind of terrible that is quiet and slow but heavy and super alarming. When you blink to find you’ve spent all day in bed; and then it’s been a couple days. And you’re like oh man, I might really be in trouble.
Luckily though there have also been a few walks. Long walks. One down to the lake and others to the grocery. But there’s this implication summer weather brings, one that implies you should be full of lightness and sultry feelings perhaps, and I’ve been having none of that. What’s the saddest movie that takes place in June? July and August? I’ve hit the wall emotionally and so decided to take up counselling. In my first session I mentioned over and over, my seeming inability to work. Panic used to persuade me, but now there is no panic. Everything just passes. A feeling has come, a feeling of being far from home with no way back, meanwhile I’m living where I’ve always lived, being where I’ve always been — maybe that is the problem. Sometimes one just needs to get the fuck out of town!!!
Then of course as soon as I’ve written all that, I feel suddenly full of good spirits. I’m a mix of good and batty. Best part of summer? A big box of mangoes for $6.99. Plus with a lower course load I’ve had more time to read. I finished Stoner by John Williams and am nearly done with Cassandra at the Wedding by Dorothy Baker, both of which are NYRB classics, nice and sturdy but accessible when it comes to the language. I got upset reading Cassandra at the Wedding because I so wanted the storyline to go one way, only for it to nosedive in another. Such is life. Such a deep, rhythmic and sensual book, though. Also: boy, maybe the simple thing is that I am dumb, but I tried getting into Persuasion by Jane Austen and I am just not there yet. Not at all. So I’ve put it aside and will return when I’ve gained my strength (in terms of vocabulary and my ability to follow a sentence through multiple commas).
This post title comes from a novel by Italo Calvino, The Baron In The Trees. Here’s the summary:
Cosimo di Rondó, a young Italian nobleman of the eighteenth century, rebels against his parents by climbing into the trees and remaining there for the rest of his life. He adapts efficiently to an existence in the forest canopy—he hunts, sows crops, plays games with earth-bound friends, fights forest fires, solves engineering problems, and even manages to have love affairs. From his perch in the trees, Cosimo sees the Age of Enlightenment pass by and a new century dawn.
I’ve never read it; I stumbled upon it by going through my new favourite column, Eat Your Words by Valerie Stivers. It’s AMAZING. Stivers is AMAZING. She goes through books and recreates the dishes mentioned, and when it comes to Baron, we get recipes for Sour Cherry Meringue Pie, Tree-Nut Tart, White Chocolate Peach Tart and Frozen Grapefruit Chiffon Pie with Gingersnap Crust. What a way to inhabit a book before you’ve been there (if you’re like me and have read hardly any of the books she references).
I love food, pictures and descriptions. I recently followed the Redwall Feasts Bot on Twitter for lovely sentences like “I'd like a beaker of raspberry fizz and a big pastie, a mushroom and carrot one; after that I think I'd go for a piece of hot apple and pear crumble, with sweet custard poured all over it.” Side note: summer heirloom tomatoes are the best tomatoes in the world. Tomato sandwiches get me hot and emotional. Crusty bread, heaps of mayo, a bright layer of tomatoes, and salt and pepper, tons of both. Christ. Another favourite is toast with butter, salt and radishes. I could eat this all the time. I’m going to eat it as soon as I wake up tomorrow!
My favourite “hauls” are books and groceries. Yesterday I bought dried cranberries, bbq corn nuts, halloumi, multigrain bread, parsley, mango/pineapple candy rings and a purple sweet potato.
It’s nearly midnight. I have a lot of work to do before an internship meeting in the morning. I fucking hate meetings; oh jeeze stop wasting my time. Seeing as how I just can’t work, this will be a mighty task — I hope I can achieve it. I’ve got apple cinnamon tea + a stick of cinnamon in my thermos and Interview with the Vampire on the television.
Just reminding myself the meeting will be over with by noon tomorrow and I’ll get to eat my radish toast and later, at night, go see Nope and bring my candy rings and have some salty, buttery popcorn.
There is not much more I can do but give myself over, and all the way over. Once I get to the point where I’m scared I should keep going.
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All Saints’ Wake
Modern AU. It’s Agi’s second favorite time of the year. Estinien tries to make his girlfriend happy. Serafina has a party. NSFW.
Estinien tapped his foot while riding the elevator up to Agnes’s apartment in the Lavender Beds Building. Season’s changing, which means only one thing---All Saints’ Wake and that bloody nonsense. It’s all for children who get scared easily and shit…or adults who want to dress in stupid costumes for stupid parties. He exited the elevator, carrying his overnight bag and a bouquet of flowers for Agnes. Estinien knocked on the door and heard the prettiest voice ever call from the other side.
“It’s unlocked, love!”
Estinien opened the door hoping to find his girlfriend putting about in the kitchen or running into his arms.
What he saw was Agnes decorating her apartment for All Saints’ Wake.
Oh.
Agnes dropped some orange and black lights in a box and walked briskly to him. “Hi! How are you, sexy?”
“Good, good. And you?” How does she have so many decorations?! Where does she keep them?! “I see you’ve been busy.”
Agnes’s eyes widened and then it hit her. “Oh, right! I love All Saints’. I fucking love it. I decorate my apartment and classroom. I always love dressing up! Plus, Sera has a party every year, which is amazing! And you know what the best part this year is, sexy?” As Agnes spoke, she got more excited and is fucking vibrating with excitement. She’s so cute…and so hot. Cute and hot. “We can do costumes together!” Once she was saw his face, hers fell. “Or not.”
Fuck fuck fuck you have GOT to save this. Swallow your damned pride and do this for her. You love her damnit! Make her happy! Estinien rubbed the back of his neck. “We can. I just…I don’t want it corny or anything.”
She bit her lip nervously. “I promise it won’t be. I was thinking,” Agnes went into her bedroom and pulled out a school uniform. “I was thinking either zombie or vampire schoolgirl!” She held up a sweater, white shirt, and black skirt. “What do you think? You could be like zombie or vampire jock who’s my boyfriend.”
At least it’s not like dressing up as a kitten and puppy or some shit. “Hmph, I’ve got those clothes at least. Won’t have to shop.”
“Nope!” She’s happy again. Good. “I’ll get us the vampire ‘fangs’…high quality ones…” She’s fucking giddy! “Ooooooooooh this’ll be so much fun!”
“Fun” is certainly a word. Estinien hugged her. “As long as you’re happy that’s all that matters to me.” He rubbed her back and prayed to himself. Please, let her be happy. Let me make her happy. Even if it means looking like a twat, I’ll do it to see her smile.
***
On the night of All Saints’ Wake, Estinien escorted Agnes to Serafina’s apartment in Mist for her annual All Saints’ Wake Super Spooky Party. I can’t believe that was actually on an invitation. Those words. All together. For Fury’s sake. At least I’m wearing “normal” clothes…minus these damned vampire fangs. Remember, this is all for Agi. All for her.
“Oooooh I’m so excited! Sera’s parties are always so much fun. You’ll see, love!” Agnes exclaimed, holding onto his bare arm tightly. While Agnes was wearing her old school uniform (not the “ugly shoes” she had to wear---she went with sneakers instead), Estinien put on a pair of shorts (extremely short shorts all for my special girl’s benefit), a t-shirt (very tight, once again for her benefit), and my best ratty old sneakers.
“I bet.” Estinien snorted. “Which apartment is hers?”
“Let me have her buzz us in.” Agnes stepped up to the buzzer and chose Apartment 67. Then a loud buzz unlocked the door in front of Estinien. “All set!”
Upon entering Serafina’s apartment, it took approximately no time for Rena to roll her eyes at Estinien. “Is that seriously your costume? You realize this is an All Saints’ Wake party right?”
Agnes giggled as she approached Rena for a hug. “Oh, hush you. He’s a jock vampire, and I’m his straight-A student vampire girlfriend.”
“And the seven hells are you supposed to be Rena?” Estinien asked, crossing his arms over his chest. “You look like a—”
“Slutty lawyer? Why yes! It’s a shame Aymeric didn’t want to match…” Rena sighed dramatically.
“Dearest,” Aymeric’s sonorous voice boomed as he and Serafina (the hostess is wearing a butler’s costume with a fake bloody hatchet on her back) came into the living room, each carrying a tray of snacks. “I’m so much better than your slutty lawyer!”
Estinien’s eyes bugged at the sight of his best friend. A fancy waistcoat, big fur jacket, and A BLOODY WALKING STICK?!?! “What the fuck are you supposed to be? A bloody pimp?” Or an asshole on one of Agi’s romance novels?!
Aymeric’s mouth dropped open as Serafina, Rena, and Agnes all laughed. “How dare you! I’m my ancestor and namesake the first Lord Speaker of Ishgard! And you look like you’re ready to do some training at the gym!”
Wrapping an arm around Agnes’s shoulders, Estinien smirked. “Jock vampire boyfriend to this lovely vampire girlfriend.” Agi is by far the best looking and best costumed person here! That’s my opinion, and I’m sticking to it!
Serafina laughed. “Get a room you two! I’m expecting a few more victims…erm, party guests. Thancred should be back any second. I can’t believe I forgot to get extra ice.”
“Your hero in shining tights has returned, princess!” Thancred announced, wearing a sexy maid costume and holding large bags of ice in each hand. “Hello everyone! Thank you for coming!”
“I must say Thancred you look smashing in your costume.” Agnes said happily. “Best maid ever!”
Flashing his usual charming grin, Thancred nodded and gave Agnes a hug. “Thank you, my dear. And you look positively splendid as a vampire schoolgirl.”
The guests chatted for a few moments before Serafina spoke. “My beloved victims, I mean friends, welcome! First, we’re going to do a little twist on Pin the Feather on the chocobo…” She held up a jack o’lantern smile. “Pin the Mouth on the Jack O’Lantern! Either do a shot or ten spins with your eyes closed for everyone’s turn. Whoever gets the mouth to where it’s supposed to be gets a prize!”
That’s not a bloody twist. It’s just stupid! Why can’t we just drink and gossip and then I take Agi home so we can fuck? Remember, you’re here for Agi. Have fun for Agi…and Serafina too because she’s got great booze.
Several shots and spins later, Rena won Pin the Mouth on the Jack O’Lantern with a perfect placement. She shrugged. “I have to do all sorts of shit for modeling and have to walk perfectly. This was nothing!” Her prize was a bottle of Wineport’s best champagne, which is fine I guess. Champagne’s not my favorite, but I wanted to win damnit! I was so bloody close! That bloody pixie woman…
More drinks and food were served.
Everyone ate.
Then Serafina grinned.
“Now that all of you, minus Agi of course, are suitably liquored up, I think it’s time for some Truth or Dare.” What the fuck evil ass grin is that?!?!?! She’s a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped into an allegedly fantasia-addicted woman. “In a circle everyone. I think that the most sober among us should go first.”
Agnes blushed. “I-I’m not really the best at this game, Sera…”
Serafina chuckled, sipping her wine. “You’ll be fine, Agi.”
Agi at the very least won’t make someone do something too humiliating. Just not her nature, my sweet girl.
“I, erm…okay…Rena, truth or dare?”
Rena, a little glassy eyed from wine and a homemade margarita from Thancred, smirked. “Truth.”
“Why do you tease Estinien so much?”
The room fell silent as all eyes went to Rena.
AGI, SERIOUSLY?!!? YOU GO IN FOR THE FUCKING KILL ON YOUR BEST FRIEND?!?! Estinien, a little tipsy himself, leaned into her ear. “Sweetheart, you didn’t—”
“Because,” Rena said loudly. “he’s a loveable dumbass. Emphasis on the dumb. Of course I know you’re a good guy, Estinien. Aymeric wouldn’t be friends with you otherwise. You’re just a dumbass. A loveable dumbass.” Her light purple eyes narrowed at him. “And you better not hurt my Agi, or else I’ll fucking kill you and no one will find your body.”
Aymeric’s eyes widened. “SHE DIDN’T MEAN THAT!”
Agnes, mouth hanging open, nodded. “Ohhhhhh yes she did.”
Thancred coughed discreetly. “Ahem, Rena you’re up next.”
“O-oh no, you don’t Waters. Rena, you fucking pixie woman, you’d kill me and make my body disappear?!?!?” Estinien’s voice steadily rose as he spoke. “How?!?!?”
Rena tutted him and sipped more of her margarita. “No, no, no. It’s not your turn, dumbass. I choose…Thancred. Truth or dare?”
SHE…SHE FUCKING…WHAT DOES AYMERIC SEE IN HER?!?!
Thancred thought for a second. “Hmmm, dare.”
“Do the Moogle Dance.” Rena looks positively evil here. Why though? It’s just a stupid dance.
Thancred blinked, and Estinien swore he saw a scowl. “Ah yes, my favorite dance in the world.”
Agnes touched Estinien’s hand and whispered, “Thancred fucking hates the Moogle Dance.”
I can tell. He’s shit at dancing this. Even I’m better! ME! And I’m a shit dancer! Not like Mr. I Know How to Waltz Like a Fucking Asshole…
Once Thancred was finished, he sat down next to Serafina and looked at targets. We’re all his targets. Shit. Waters is no fool. He’s smart. He’s charming. “Ah, Estinien…” FUCK. “Truth or dare, my good man?” He asked with his most charming grin.
Shit. Fuck. If I say “dare” maybe he’ll simply let do some pushups…or do something wild. Fucking hells. Think Varlineau. THINK! “Truth.” He blurted out before he could fucking think! SHIT!
Raising an eyebrow, Thancred nodded. “Alright then. Who has the bigger cock---you or Aymeric?”
“I DO, OF COURSE!” Estinien bellowed. “MY COCK IS THE BIGGEST COCK, AND AGI LOVES IT!” Oh…oops. Maybe should’ve thought that through first. NO MATTER! “Tell them, Agi.”
A sound resembling a tiny squeak escaped his red-faced girlfriend, while the Serafina and Thancred laughed. Rena narrowed her purple eyes at Estinien.
Aymeric drank the rest of the wine in his glass and practically slammed it on the carbuncle coffee table. “I’ll have you know, SER that my cock is the larger one! And RENA LOVES IT! Tell them, darling.”
Rena rolled her eyes. “There’s only one way to settle this---get them out. Serafina, find some measuring tape.”
Agnes’s face somehow became more red. “A-are you for real? You want our boyfriends to just whip out their cocks and have Serafina measure with tape?!?!?”
“Agi, it’s the only way we’ll know for certain.” Rena explained as if she were talking to a small child. “And besides, what’s an All Saints’ Wake party without some cocks?”
“WHO SAYS THAT?!?!?” Agnes yelled, knocking over her plate of cookies. “WHO?!?”
Rena shrugged nonchalantly. “People.”
Estinien rose, smirking, and began to undo the tie on his shorts. “You’ll see who’s bigger, Mr. Fancy Pants Lawyer.”
Standing, Aymeric also smirked and started to unbutton his trousers. “Ah, but your confidence is misplaced, Estinien, because I have something you don’t!”
“A law degree!” Rena squealed and clapped. “My darling is so smart!”
…no. I don’t have a law degree, but that’s not needed in this situation, you mad woman!
Slowly pulling down his trousers, Aymeric’s sapphire eyes glittered with excitement. “Nay, but thank you dearest. What I have is known in my family as the LCD…” When he revealed himself, Serafina, Thancred, and Agnes gasped. “The Lord Commander Dick---the finest and largest dick blessed by Halone herself. Named also for my famous ancestor the first Lord Speaker.”
Estinien rolled his eyes. “You think you’ve got a famous cock? Look at this Coerthan born and raised cock!” Estinien’s cock, adorned with white curls, stood at attention. Because I’m already thinking about not only beating Mr. Lord Commander Dick but also fucking my super sexy girlfriend after! “Are we stroking ourselves to hardness and then measuring, Serafina?”
While the spectacle around her continued, Agnes simply sat with her mouth agape and looking between Estinien and Aymeric. “Are we actually doing this? Is this happening? IS THIS REAL?!?!?”
Serafina, thankfully, took pity on her friend. “Alright, alright. Let’s stop this before Agi’s brain explodes.”
“FUCK THAT! Measure our cocks!” Estinien bellowed. “Get yourself fully hard, lawyer boy, and let’s see who’s bigger!”
***
Several hours later, Estinien lay in bed and stared at the ceiling. Equal. Fully hard we’re the exact fucking length. I thought for sure I was bigger…
“Sexy, for the love of…go the fuck to sleep.” Agnes muttered, curled against his side. Poor Agi nearly passed out when we did the measuring. She was pissed and kept calling us “stupid teenage boys” while rolling her eyes. I’ll make it up to her. I promise. I’ll do the most romantic shit ever next weekend when I go to Gridania.
And Aymeric can keep his not-nearly-as-impressive family heirloom to himself!
#rena calab#aymeric de borel#thancred waters#serafina lom#agnes currai#estinien wyrmblood#estinien x wol#estinien varlineau#wolstinien#wolcred#wolmeric#all saints wake#modern au#serafina is such a troll#so is rena#LCD
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When was the last time you had a Poptart?
Must be a handful of years now. Poptarts are super rare in our groceries and when they do show up it's like 400 pesos which is just not worth it. I just get it when I have a very very specific craving for Poptarts which doesn't happen a lot.
Do you like hot chocolate?
I just get this one Spanish hot chocolate at my favorite European cuisine restaurant and that's it. I never try anything else because I know it won't hold a candle to my San Gines hot chocolate hahaha.
Where do you buy gasoline?
One of the Petrons on my local highway.
Who made you laugh the hardest today?
I hardly laughed today, so idk. I guess my sister? She makes me laugh at least once a day.
Who was the last person to promise you something, and what was it?
My mom telling me she'll wake me up at 11 PM so I can meet the calltime for my hike yesterday, which she was able to do.
Would you ever jump into a fire to save your bestfriend?
Hard to tell until I'm in that situation. I like to think I would hold out for Angela for as long as I could.
Do you have a callus from writing too much?
I absolutely did. I had a 14-year callus on my right middle finger – it's no longer as blackened as it used to be, but the bump is still there and I assume will always be.
What was the last thing you failed at?
Prepping for my hike. I wanted to pack light so I only brought a waist bag, and I totally forgot about a change of clothes. That meant I was stuck with my sweaty, dusty clothes even during the long drive back home hahaha, but anywayyyy that also meant I had the BEST shower ever as soon as I got home so I guess I still win.
Who is someone you’ve made a bad first impression on?
Probably that dude I had my first-ever job interview with. It was my first, I didn't know how to act, I was extremely nervous, and I kicked off the introductions by reaching my hand out to shake his.
Problem was that was back in September 2020, and it was the peak of the pandemic when you did. not. want. any fucking one getting in contact with you in any capacity whatsoever. I could tell that that set the tone for the remainder of the interview because he acted a little condescendingly from that moment on.
Can you use chopsticks correctly?
I can use chopsticks to hold shit up but I doubt I'm doing it the actual proper way, like with the right finger placements and stuff.
What was the last movie you watched on TV?
Ang Tanging Ina Mo hahahaha.
Who is your best guy friend?
Hans.
Do you think walruses are cute?
Sure!
What is the correct plural form of platypus?
Platypi? Platypuses?? I'm not actually sure heheh.
When was the last time you used a glue stick?
Must have been in high school or college, so the safest time range would be 4-11 years ago lmao. I don't use them anymore! I did use glue recently when I made a scrapbook for Bea, but it was the liquid type.
What is your favorite form of transportation?
Car, please. I know it's a problem and I'm part of the problem, but since I'm privileged enough to have a car in this godforsaken country I might as well take advantage of it. Our public transport is one massive clusterfuck and is a daily struggle for the average Filipino who otherwise has no choice but to take it.
Do you read cereal boxes while you’re eating?
Sure, and I do this with other packaged food as well haha.
What’s the last thing you accidentally (or purposely) burnt?
Fries. I like them on the toastier side.
Do you know anyone named Trey?
Nope.
What was the name of your last or current math teacher?
I don't even remember who she was anymore.
Did you know that there is a Twilight-sponsored Blood Drive named, “Carlisle Would Approve”? Donate blood for Edward? :)
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHHHAHAHAHHA no I don't but thanks for the laughhhhh
Do you know anyone with a lip piercing?
I probably do. Tons of people from my university had tattoos and piercings.
What did the last tattoo you saw, look like?
Carlos recently had a "Fear is the mind killer" tattoo done. It's still so fresh that his arm hair's still shaved and the tattoo's still raised haha.
Do you own any hair ribbons?
Nope.
When was the last time you curled your hair with a curling iron?
During my college grad shoot, 4 years ago.
Do your fingertips hurt when you type for a long time?
Nope, but my wrists occasionally will.
Do you know anyone with a green bookbag?
No.
Do you like colorful skinny jeans?
Eh, not anymore.
What was the last reason you were disappointed at someone?
I was disappointed at myself for the tone I used with Celeste first thing in the morning.
Do you like “Juicy Couture”?
Nope.
Where did you buy your favorite pair of jeans from?
Mango.
When was the last time you wore a white shirt?
Last week.
Have you ever given birth?
Nopes.
Doesn’t it just sound painful?
It does, which is why I never want to go through it. I admire those who have, though.
Did you know that the equivalence of a woman giving birth, is a man peeing out a golf ball? 0_o
Huhuhuhu what in the fuck
Do you enjoy making out?
Sure.
What’s your favorite food to put ketchup on?
Only with tortang talong or fish, and only if we're dealing with banana ketchup. I never liked tomato ketchup and don't really want it anywhere near my food.
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