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vnknowcrow · 2 months

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Ily "I would have died for Carla, but now I'll live for courier", ily "Carla always managed to make you forget but courier always made you remember" ily healthy boone fanfic writers please never stop

#i hope everyone knows that im still going insane abt the boone fanfic you wrote in 2013 #and that its remembered dearly #ily craig boone fic from 2011 on fanfiction. com #craig boone #fanfic

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jenna-louise-jamie · 28 days

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i think it's so interesting how different book!yassen and tv!yassen are.

first off how book!yassen sent alex to scorpia, it was a mistake because he wasn't thinking clearly. tv!yassen did it on purpose (to the best of my knowledge).

book!yassen did not want alex to kill. he tells him this twice, “killing is for grown ups.” and asking alex if he can really pull the trigger and shoot him, when alex breaks into the boat during eagle strike. going into great detail to dissuade alex from doing it, and all of me believes not just because yassen didn't want to die in this moment. this makes sense for book!yassen because he himself didn't want to kill. so he's trying to save alex from his own fate.

tv!show yassen doesn't seem to have any issues with killing. he doesn't particularly enjoy it, but it's his job and he does what he has to do so he can survive. so he's okay with encouraging alex to do it. by telling him he should view the people he's assigned to assassinate as nothing more than targets. tricking him into helping assassinate max. encouraging him to let go of his emotions. he wants alex to join him by his side.

ultimately while their methods are different, their end goals are the same. they both want to protect alex. book!yassen thinks he can achieve this by pushing alex away, and tv!show yassen thinks he can achieve this by pulling alex in closer. and both work because they're so compelling.

#i didn't phrase this very sensibly but i hope the point comes across!!!#they both love alex very much and don't want to see him die #also worth noting. i can't see tv!show yassen putting alex in a bullfighting ring. for really any reason #alex rider #yassen gregorovich #alex rider tv #alex rider books #there was another thing i wanted to mention but its completely gone from my mind. if i remember maybe ill add it in a reblog.#they're the same character but they're different. i love them both dearly they mean a lot to me.

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winter-kh-sideblog · 8 months

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Kingdom hearts really made a character and said “hi this is naminé, she’s a sweet little girl in a bad situation and basically she’s made out of… she’s what would happen if you had kairi’s heart in sora’s body” and then they LATER came back and said “actually she’s not made of kairi anymore, she’s her own person. She has her own heart. But like. In riku’s body. In a body made to look identical to riku” and it is so funny to me that no one noticed she was transgender because they were too busy crying over kingdom hearts lore. Anyway go namine ,,, trans rights

#kh namine #namine #kingdom hearts #no i will not shut up about this #every once in a while i Remember that shes canonically transgender #its definitely not on purpose #but irs also undeniably canon #i love her so dearly #she and xion are such trans icons and theyre both trans on accident #good for them

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oatbugs · 25 days

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procrastination is starting to have its consequences finally

#on my friends living room floor they love together but one of them has been london for weeks or maybe months #to be with her love. im on a foam mattress from one of their beds next to a glass bottle of water opened by one of them #in a mug given to me by another. the weather felt like my childhood today and it also felt like 2 years ago.#(put space in the heavens Einstein's idea and hes your friend too so nothing to fear) around the table they drank and laughed and i thought #i hope you keep growing so full with the love you receive . i hope your appetite becomes insatiable from how used to it you are #and i know youre all leaving soon but i hope one day you miss this and that youll be happy you miss it #its worth missing i think #i thought he didnt care but he said after exams hes going walk around this area over and over #(this is near where he lived and where we visited almost daily for a year)#(hed come across the bridge on a lake)#we went where she used to live and at the entrance a fox sat calmly. it just yawned and stared.#it felt important somehow. i think maybe their impressions of me will never be close to how i feel inside but i think #i love them enough for that not to matter. i dont think theyll ever know this. i dont think if they did it would change much.#and seeing them smile makes my heart glow anyway. today i tried their malaysian tea the ginger burned my throat #they warmed my heart. hes going to canada soon and hes going to the US soon and shes going everywhere soon ill never understand #how were supposed to live with memories and with seperation and with the past but we do it anyway so i think it doesnt matter much #i wanted to write a poem for the lab rats with the fibre optic wires lit with blue forcing them to turn around and around #something about how im sorry that the two photon arrays burned the inside of your brain. im sorry about the sharp points of multielectrode #arrayes. im sorry about everything we do to you. she asked to see me tomorrow. im trying to have self control but i miss her so awfully #last night my friend talked to me and i updated on everything that happened with love and the lack of it and she just started laughing #and she told me about the same thing from her side. and she told me about how she loved london because she would walk the streets #and she felt like the people were her. and her eyes would go over the people and the bag of bagels and the construction men they probably #have a kid at home maybe shes a daughter. this kid is crying for her mother and the building you just walked past caused #blisters and pain and people died in it and very likely people were born in it. we talked for hours and i felt like #i was holding her hand just like that time she held mine watching a horror film. i love her so much #my friend is a genius and i remember her picking up the charms of my phone and staring at the leaf hanging from them. shes side stepping to #music drinking dangerous cider and cocktails from a movie and chit chatting with billionaires and undergrads #i love her dearly. his head covered in electrodes. she tells me about a syrian guy shes in love with and she says #what you feel and what i feel is like cocaine. ive tried a lot of fucking cocaine.#she says ive reminded her of what living actually feels like and to never put energy into someone who doesnt see me this way.

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thiscatiscreepy · 1 year

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Pondering the orb (and the wet beast inside)

[ID: digital drawing of Raphaella la Cognizi from the chest up. She is a white woman with long light hair, blue eyes and bat wings. She is leaning her arms and head on a transparent ball, and looks fondly at a slick red creature inside. The creature looks like the human heart, with 7 translucent tentacles coming out of it. The creature us alive and is clinging to the inside of the ball. Two of its tentacles are poking out of tye ball through breathing holes. End ID]

#its been a while since i posted anything #hope i still remember how to write ids #the mechanisms #raphaella la cognizi #the beast is my lil guy i created for a fic that i never finished. i still love it dearly <3 #its a blood parasite. it plants itself into the bloodstream and feeds on blood that passes through.#theyre mostly pretty small but the one in the heart grows to be preddy big #cat draws #body horror #cat talks

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angellurgy · 2 months

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squeak

#when i am gone it will be no more impactful than a tree falling in a forest with no one to hear it.#my death will have a meaninglessly small impact on this world. maybe it'll have a larger impact on the incorporeal.#there is something in my soul. something hungry. a serpent of unstoppable magnitude held captive in my stomach.#it wont stop until it or i kill us both will it? like a cancer.#im so deeply sorry im so bad at responding to everyone's kind messages. even more so sorry for what will eventually happen next #i have some plans. to excise this tumor that is myself. to rid the world of this putrid filth girl who is nothing but a drain on her compan #we'll see what happens. at least i got my body to a point of self approval before. at least i tried music. at least i tried to be me.#even if it changed nothing. at least im more secure in my being. if only the people around me werent so emotionally far. if only we cld tal #if only i could live with my self approval instead of loving and wanting so dearly. instead of having a mind corrupted by love #and friendship #i was so much. i know you all barely know anything about me in reality. if i asked any you'd probably just list off kinks and species.#but still. ty those who'll remember yk...#and as backup. if it doesnt work. well. please dont hate me. im just a girl who needs out. and cant keep her thoughts inside more #i hope i can be happy in the afterlife. i hope i can see these angels and maybe be one myself.#gonna put a post on top of this to hide it from brand new ppl lookjng at my blog. bc yeah. you all dont need to hear all of this #its the last one of these for this period either way #god i wish i couldve gone to toronto. i want to so bad still. god. why did i have to realize my hopelessness now of all times #bye

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remylong · 4 months

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i think they should do statistical studies on the melliot fandom like i NEED to put all thirty-five of us under the microscope asap

#people who were adamandians in 2021 does anyone remember midge and harshal who lived like a street down from each other in philadelphia 😭😭#i know midge has a tumblr but i think of harshal dearly ☹️ i haven't talked to him since i deleted discord last year #*2022 sorry!!#anyway i can't say much about my present situation without doxxing both me and avvy so this is the most ill like Post about it but #if i had a dollar etc etc etc #actually tbh i kind of want to use the bracket account to do like a mini melliot census but idk if its weird

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ajdrawshq · 19 days

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watching the missing link stuff.. i want to play this game sso fuckign bad

#KINGDOM HEARTS I MISSED U.........#i Need to throw my keykids into this thing. oh my god #khml spoilers next tags #ALSO I CANT BELJEVE PPL WERENT JOKING ABT THIS JUST. BEING PLAYER AGAIN?? PROBABLY????#I WASNT EXPECTING THAT TO BE REAL..#but also it lines up perfectly w what i had planned for my keykids <3 #the rusted starlight too..... ough.....#and the fact that they cant remember their name?? i need to. make new names for my sillyguys. what would they name themselves #i think if i can play the game myself id play as dia again..#also. i rly hope they add more options to the character creator bc the current lack of skintone options is. hm.#the options for everything else look nice so far at least..#ALSO PLAYER TALKING?????#AND THE MUSIC.. its so pretty..#THE BAROQUE SOCIETYXBXJSJ #im in love w this so far #WHY ARE WE BEING ACCUSED OF ASSAULT ??#oh its that blue guy ive been seeing #that closeup on his eye made him loop exactly like aqua JXBSJ i see what ppl mean when they say he moght be an ancestor of hers #camera backing out to see 2 silver haired fuckers on a roof. yeah this is kingdom hearts #these guys are so silly #this version of dearly beloved is so good whadda hell..#and this scala music?? the whimsy ..#astral dimension and distortions..#welp. hello again gacha game #this world is so gorgeous....#i need. this game #kh

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malwarechips · 2 months

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i found the camera

#i do not remember where i got this avatar but i love it dearly #its the gender #world is the drawing board though #lev.txt

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poliodeuces · 4 months

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mask off i do not like the theory that ramuda's cloned from rei's wife.............

#i cant tell exactly why alright i just do not like it at all.....#ive always been a fan of stella's scientist ramuda. i think it would be cool if the person ramuda's cloned from is just rei's colleague #or a close friend #like i Know his wife could also be both of these which is the only way ypu could sell the theory to me #as far as we know ramuda's clones are also made w being replaceable/disposable as one of its attributes #and i dont want to think thats what rei wouldve wanted w a clone made from his wife who he seems to love v dearly #aaaa idk. what i also want is to see rei have a friend #and nayuta not just be rei's dead wife #i mean shes not confirmed dead but i meant the trope #it's different from how gentsro's brother is handled bc it was hinted from the v start #i know the inherent drama of cloning your dead loved one bc it's a huge part of tales of the abyss lol #but ugh i cant arrange my thoughts coherently sorry...#i remember first having this thought seeing rei give one of the first clones a cigarette and i wanted it to mean something #as in to relive an old memory...bc out of all the first things he couldve done it was that #or does it just mean he was indifferent to the clone's health lol bc it's definitely a choice

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riverblujay · 11 months

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there is no greater mourning than accepting after multiple hours that you will not be able to find a very good fic you suddenly had a hazy memory of. you can only hope it has not been deleted and that maybe, against all odds, it will return home to you someday

#😔 shout out to this one lance & pidge vld fic i suddenly had a memory of #and was SURE i still had in my bookmarks. but cannot find even after trawling through searches/tags/30+ pages of my ao3 history #u are dearly missed. rip #AND to a beautiful zukka fic i have not been able to find #(canon divergence s2e1 where azula manages to capture zuko and he gets put in a prison (NOT boiling rock)#and then post s2 finale sokka is captured and sent to the same prison. and they bond as they break out)#war prisoners zukka fic come home to me someday. pls #BUT ALSO THIS PIDGE & LANCE BONDING FIC. the only things i remember is that its pre-canon at the garrison #and that pidge apologizes to lance for being an asshole abt smth #and i THINK (???) they are both trans???????#if anyone knows either of these and has read this far PLEASE enlighten me. these lost children haunt my brain rent free

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bloomfish · 3 months

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I've been remaking some of my old mixes from 8tracks (rest in peace, most beautiful website) on spotify and honestly some of them were so good I'm impressed with myself. I should do this for a living. wish there was a job that involved putting different songs together in a specific order

#like how much thought i put into the continuity of the songs and the overall cohesion of the mixes lol #and very different mixes like from ambient to like... welsh folk music lmao #every day of my life i miss 8tracks #honestly spotify has been so destructive for every other kind of music platform like... remember pandora? its obsolete now #the other thing i miss dearly is windows media player. hands down the best music software there will ever be #it was ugly but SIMPLE. FUNCTIONAL. my library was immaculately organised

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ubersaur · 8 months

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y'know? after years of dread abt dying alone I think I'm now ok with it. I'm pretty damn grey/demi-aro and Im finally starting to feel okay about that!!

#thanks meds? Thanks representation? thank you all my friends who i love so dearly? I dont fucking know! but #over the last several weeks/months suddenly it's whatever and im accepting the aro aspects of myself!#I'm not gonna shut myself off from the possibility but like. I want to be realistic about it yknow?#crushes/Romantic interest come around very rarely for me. Rarer still for them affections to also be returned.#hell i barely remember why i dreaded being aro. I guess for simplicity #I just didn't want to be alone. But I'm not. I love my friends!#still feels a little alienating sometimes sure #but i already have so many OTHER intersecting queer & alienating aspects abt my identity what's one more lmfao.#imma jsut be a little weirdo its fine #idk just loving myself a lil more every day :)#rambling /#u

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orbdotexe · 5 months

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They’ve been like this for a while now. The Guardian gets hurt, Ghost scolds them, and they feel guilty for burdening him; for dragging him down with them, and being why he can never go home. They won’t listen when he says they’re his home.

bonk bonk bonk. this is my apology for taking so long on... literally everything else. The Cayde short is actually done now, but wasn't at the time of me finishing this one (which has been done for a few days, I'm just. too lazy lmao) so someone bully me into posting Cayde Hug please

Anyway here is a nice Young Wolf and Ghost short! angst with a side of some beloved bickering <3 they are so stubborn but they are soulmates (platonic), your honor.

[ao3 link]

The statues, twice their size, are caught in poses of combat-ready or investigative, some having tried to run farther down the hall. The blizzard swells and dies out farther down the corridor, leaving the blanket of wisp-soft Void swirling around their steps as mist continues bleeding through the cracks in what was once a battalion of Cabal.

Their arm sways at their side, cold blood squeezing out of shrapnel wounds down the side of their body, the other hand tightly gripping Howl. Ghost materializes to their left, but they stumble forward, stepping towards the frosted over parts of their helmet. There’s a shard of a frag launch splitting down through the eye of it; the orange glow dead.

They plant the tip of the sword on the ground to hold steady as they lower themself over their helmet, Ghost trilling worriedly behind them. The streams of blood begin to reheat, numbness leaving the limb in favor of a boiling pain, and they can feel the soothing chill of Ghost scanning their injuries.

Shakily setting Howl down beside them, they move to pick up the tattered helmet, to be met with an irritated strumming through the Bond. “Guardian, at least hold still long enough for me to heal that arm before you make the bleeding worse,” Ghost sighs out. The Guardian only grumbles, before holding the arm out for a proper scan.

The movement itself makes them tense, resisting the urge to screw their eyes shut against the pins and needles and the accidental twisting of metal scraps still in some wounds. They hiss at the cold air, partially regretting the choice of Void as they all but pour heat out through the shredded armor and skin.

They trace the broken edges of their helmet with their spare hand, rather than watch Ghost knit the skin back together. The feeling of the metal shards being pushed out from the inside as the torn muscle pulls back together makes them nauseous.

No matter how many times they’ve felt it, or woken up from a death to their insides still being patched together, or had to pull themself off of spikes for it to even happen—The nausea always comes back. The frustration of never getting used to something so common in their non-life always comes back.

“Guardian.” Their fingers are bleeding, cut on the broken metal. The edges of their vision swims in and out, and they're not sure if it’s blood loss or the hallucinations again. “Guardian? You’re doing it again.”

They blink, and lower the outstretched arm. The burning feels distant, and the skin is stiff with dried blood, but the wounds feel closed, and the repaired parts of their armor are thinner than the parts that hadn’t been damaged.

He sighs, more irritated—exhausted?—this time. “We’ll need to see Drifter again if we want to repair your armor properly. There’s only so much I can do.” It feels as if he’s scanning them, but the blue glow never comes. “Still with me?”

As a soothing pulse pushes through stiff barriers of Light, they feel some sense return to their body and their face soften. Turning their head away from Ghost, the Guardian gives a small nod. A part of them wants to cradle him; say they’re sorry for putting him through this. He should’ve had someone better.

They settle instead for a soft rippling in the Light; the feeling of tucking a sleeping other’s hair away. He knows what they mean.

Ghost shoves his shell into the side of their head, making them lose the thought and duck away. “We’re not doing this again, Guardian! If the Traveler itself gave me a chance to pick someone else, you know I’d refuse every time.” His voice softens as he speaks, and he must have seen the small wince that crosses their face.

“I mean it, Guardian,” he chimes, firm but soft. Wholly faithful. “When I told you, through Light or Dark, I meant it. Even if it’s just you and me against the world, I wouldn’t change a thing so long as I had you.”

They know Ghost means it; they’ve never doubted it—But that’s the problem. He deserves so much better than a monster for a partner. The crumbling, now barely recognizable statues of Stasis prove them, if not a monster, a force of chaos. Both unstoppable, and immovable. Even with the explosives and traps, there was never a chance.

The shared turmoil strains the Bond with impressions of spirals, and Ghost lowers himself to hover just over their shoulder as they hold their other hand up for him. “Monster or not—and I’m not saying you are, but you never believe me—” He rambles, “You’re still my partner. My Guardian.”

And he’s their Ghost. But it changes nothing. The blood is half dried, dripping sluggishly, as he closes the cuts in the pads of their fingers. They rub them together, the nerves still knitting together feeling like pins and needles.

Nudging him with their shoulder draws a huff out of Ghost. “Yes, I’m done. But this conversation isn’t over.”

It’s their turn to sulk—The conversation is never over. Who’s the monster, who’s to blame, who should suffer: Ghost’s answer is always the same—They scoop the parts of their helmet up, moving it to one arm, before sheathing Howl on their back.

They could clean it later. Ghost gives a puff of discontent.

As they stand, the sound of the last remnants of Stasis crackling out of existence drags their eyes up. The remaining wisps of Void smoke are quickly phasing out of the air, and they take a moment to watch the last evidence of their destruction crumble into nothing. Only the damage of weaponry to the building and their spilt blood remain.

“I’d say that’s progress, wouldn’t you?” Ghost murmurs, tone light, and they can’t help but give him a weird look. This quiet destruction– progress? They get a puff of indignity in exchange. “Well, I did get the data Drifter needed, so yes– But not what I’m talking about.”

The look he gives them is… cheeky. They don’t like it. “What I meant was…” There’s an audible smile creeping into his voice—victoriously smug—as he bumps their head. “Youuu didn’t fight me on healing this time.”

Scars. He’s smug about the scars.

They give a thin-lipped grimace at his priorities, and he just beams brighter. “It’s not much, but you don’t make personal progress very easy, Guardian.” They huff and turn away from him, walking down the hall to the back exit.

Ghost rests his shell in the junction of their hood as they pull it back up, both of them knowing the Guardian will walk slower so he won’t fall out.

“I’ll take any win I can get with you,” he chimes to himself, quiet.

#destiny 2 #the forsaken exile #Howl is literally just The Young Wolf's Howl. just to be clear #also GOD they are so soft. Wolf pleeeease what do you MEAN ''the feeling of tucking a sleeping other's hair away''#no i dont care that im the one who wrote it. absolutely insane about how much they care about each other #(sorry if the format is a bit clunky. it looks a lot better in docs and ao3--)#also also obsessed with The Bond between Guardians and Ghosts. literally the only thing i remember in canon about it #is Ghost talking about how far their bond has progressed but that he still cant read their thoughts #i love canon dearly. but im too unwell about the potential of Wolf using him as a translator lmao #it has much comedy potential.#but i also like treating the bond kind of like... the way psions are described as communicating #obsessed with that one loretab where a psion tells Misraaks their ''name'' and its a bunch of feelings... ough #so. here's my elaboration on my beloved Light Bond. even though the last Ghost snippet talked about it #but thats the bond from *his* POV. this time its Wolf!! love Wolf sm #(<incapable of shutting up about either of them)

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lakemichigans · 4 months

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you procrastinate making videos cause being judged is scary you're so close to being forgotten the hate's imaginary. kind of a raw ass line tbh

#<- me posting my story #i'm always like ''ahhh what if everyone hates this and blocks me and talks about me behind my back :((''#literally no one cares anymore lmao #i can't even remember the last time i got a hate comment #i used to get them at leastttt once a week #then i got in my head about everyone hating me and now i re-read my work literally HUNDREDS of times before i post it #it's one of my worst compulsions but i can't make myself stop #its not even like i'm proofreading them?? my mind kinda blacks out after the second re-read #it's why i always announce that i'm going to post a story post a day in advance so i have some accountability hanging over my head #otherwise i literally will keep re-reading it for weeks and never post it #thank god i never pursued writing on a professional level because holy shit i would be useless #i'm posting this on this personal blog because it's embarrassing lmaooo #this account is my diary for the 5 amazing weirdos who i appreciate dearly

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storm-driver · 1 year

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yknow, the after the battle version of dearly beloved that plays at the end of kh2 is laced with so much sorrowful nostalgia for me.

there are a lot of memories embedded in KH2 for me, it was my comfort game as a kid. it was the game i turned to after bad days at school, and the game i showed to friends in hopes they understood why i loved it.

it's specifically how id finish the game and think "that... wasn't a happy ending, was it?" Roxas and Naminé disappeared, but Sora and Kairi are together!!! and for a second, you can think "at least they can rest easy..."

but then, that after the battle theme hits. im staring at that last screen with my battle stats shown, and there's something about it that hurts. maybe it's the composition. maybe it's the single instrument. i don't know. but the end of kh2 was always so fuckin sad to me. that music, I think, played a huge part in it.

#kingdom hearts #stormy weather #I just think that.#the music in kh lends so much to the emotions #and that makes perfect sense right #roxas' theme is such a perfect example of tragedy painted into measures #but... i dunno #go listen to it if you dont remember the sound that specific ver of dearly beloved #look up specifically the kh2 after the battle dearly beloved...#it... it hits.#in a way my words cant fathom.#EDIT ITS CALLED DEARLY BELOVED REPRISE #NOT AFTER THE BATTLE #SORRY I WAS THINKING OF PASSION FOR SOME REASON #KH2 DEARLY BELOVED REPRISE

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