#and most of the party is So Fucking Stupid
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I’m just saying…. headcannons for paige with a bestfriend to partner who’s an introvert.
And I mean those introverts who seem quiet but the moment they get comfortable around you it’s over, but like only they get to see that side.
Paige seems like an extrovert that adopts introverts, like just imagine her having to drag her partner out of their room all the time cuz they’re a damn hermit.
-🐹
─ warnings | mention of drinking, teasing, fluff, nothin' else?
─ taglist | @xocherishxo @iienstein @yazmunson @euphternal and here's a link to my taglist if anyone would like to join!!
honestly, you are so right in that assumption
she definitely gets closer with more introverted people, bc opposites DO really attract
when you guys first met it was your freshman year at uconn, at first you'd probably think she's WAY too much ─ maybe even cocky LOL (but who can blame her she's the best)
but when you spend more one on one time with her, you realize she's really funny and sweet
because you're so quiet, paige would be naturally drawn to you cus she gets to know you
so she just pesters you until you eventually give in and hang out with her
from that point on, the one is never seen without the other
you guys would always be together
but like... usually, you're just WITH paige so people don't really acknowledge you cus you're so quiet
but then paige would like force you to socialize
"this is y/n, i promise she's fun you just gotta put a little liquor in her-" "PAIGE."
she would push you toward her close friends the most, def like ice, azzi, nika and kk
ESPECIALLY kk!
and then you eventually would get really close with them, you all have your cute little friend group
you and ice would make fun of paige and kk together, you and azzi are kinda similar so you find yourself hanging out with her alone a lot more, and nika would force you out your shell a lot too
after a couple months of being friends, paige would definitely find herself catching feels
like i've said in my other headcanons, she just thinks you're such a big source of comfort for her and it slowly just becomes full-on adoration cus
she adores you
and you compliment her personality so well she is just like "i NEED to have her right now"
she ends up confessing one night after a really terrible game and then y'all kiss ...
and the rest is history 🤗🤗🤗
jk here's some relationship headcanons
again, you are so right nonnie
like i mentioned, one is never seen without the other
so you're always tied at the hip, especially at parties
at first she has to force you
like FULL force
she calls backup ofc ice and kk come and then its 3 vs 1
they end up winning
and this happens time and time again, you just get so worn down you'd rather just endure the damn party then listen to all three of them scream at you
which was the goal 🥰
and you're definitely the sober one 95% of the time so you will be taking care of a very drunk paige
(maybe some separate headcanons for her if yall want)
and sometimes even ice/kk but it's mostly just your girlfriend
anyway, yeah you take her home, take of her and then get her into bed
and when you try to leave she will be so dramatic, she forces you to stay with her
you don't mind cus you love cuddly paige
but the 5% when you're the one who's blackout drunk, paige is gonna take such good care of you
because you're so introverted when you're sober, you're probably gonna be such a rowdy drunk
yes im her shes me
so paige makes sure you don't get into trouble and gets you home safe and sound
but if you do something stupid, she will never ever let you live it down
"remember that time you jumped into the pool and-" "SHUT THE FUCK UP"
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↳ thank you for reading all the way through, as always ♡
#paige bueckers smut#paige bueckers fanfiction#paige bueckers x reader#paige bueckers fic#paige bueckers#wcbb#wcbb x reader#uconn huskies#uconn#uconn wbb#uconn women’s basketball#ncaa women’s basketball#paige bueckers x oc#paige bueckers headcannons
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would you consider writing the time when max realized that he loved yn?
i remember that he was like in a mindset of idgaf what happens with her im js happy being best friends and having her in my life but i wonder how he got to that point
The way this came out…idk I hope you like it 😂 I really wish I’d retconned this whole situation but I stayed true to the fic timeline.
I just…I really hope you don’t hate it 🫠
✨Set after Max wins his 3rd championship in Qatar✨
Honestly, who (is he) to fight the alchemy?
Max has been in love before. He knows what it feels like. It felt like winning a race. The adrenaline, the elation, the satisfaction, the sliver of relief. He didn’t think there was a better feeling, and if you feel that when you’re with someone, then that must be love.
He never felt like that with you. So he wasn’t in love. He loved you, but he wasn’t in love. Thank God for that, he’d always thought to himself. Max didn’t put effort into games he wouldn’t win and the games you played with men didn’t have a rule book. He was just so lucky, to have you as a friend, and a roommate, and a feline co-parent, and that’s how it would stay.
Except, when the journalist had asked him if you were going to live with him after he retired, he didn’t know what to say. Of course you would, except, how would your boyfriend feel about that? And of course he wanted you to, but he wanted a family, too. But you were family, in some complicated way that he’d never realised before that moment might mean that you wouldn’t always be…with him.
And he didn’t have the desire or the language skills to explain that to a random German journalist. He’d rattled off some answer about how he never knew what the future would bring. It was true, he didn’t think much about the future. But he should have, because when he did it always had you in it.
He wanted a house, and a wife, and kids. It wasn’t like he envisaged doing all that with you. Except, he hadn’t envisaged doing any of it without you, either. It was always you imagined having breakfast with, you he imagined would teach his kids to ski, you he thought about when he thought about buying one of those mansions in the hills above Monaco. Naively, he hadn’t imagined either of you with partners that would mind you and Max living your lives together. It sounded fucking stupid when he thought about it. But, it’s not like he was going to marry you, because he’s not in love with you.
It’s not like I’m in love with her. He’d said that before.
Aren’t you, Max?
Isn’t he?
Is he?
So now here he is, at this totally-not-a-party party, celebrating his this third world championship, wondering if he’s in love. Wondering if that even matters. The music is loud, not enough to drown out his thoughts. He can’t even drink too much because he still has a race tomorrow. He feels lightheaded enough.
He doesn’t know why he’s questioning himself. He has an answer. He knows what being in love feels like, and he doesn’t feel that about you. How he does feel about you, is…not quantifiable. Except he’d really like a name for it right about now. One that’s not going to spin his whole world off its axis. But then, he’s not exactly the axis, is he? Not really.
He should feel like the centre of the universe tonight. He’s lost count of how many times he’s received praise and congratulations, plaudits, and pictures, even gifts. Everyone wants to be in his orbit, everyone wants to talk to him, everyone except you.
You’re leaning against the balcony, bopping along to the music, talking to his dad of all people, your flushed face and lazy grin telltale signs you’ve had too much to drink. Jos is as close as he ever gets to smiling, a telltale sign he’s had too much to drink, and the two of you are, as usual, talking over each other. His eyes linger on your long legs and gentle curves. It would be cutting a corner, to say he’s in love with you, because how can you not be at least a little bit infatuated with the most beautiful woman you’ve ever seen? But that’s not love, exactly. Even half drunk, with all this talk of spinning and the party beginning to blur at its edges, the only thing he can see clearly is you. You don’t even notice him looking, because you’re so used to feeling eyes on you.
No, being around you has never felt like winning much of anything. It actually feels a bit like he’s fighting for his life. It feels like…driving, he realises, as the gin starts to hit.
Being around you was like being in the RB19. Like being behind the wheel of something that could kill you, but fits you like a second skin. Like the illusion of having control of a force of nature. It was like living on a knife edge, but building a home there. Comfortable with the uncomfortable, they’d called him, and nothing had ever made him as uncomfortable as you.
If that was being in love, he’d probably been in love with you for as long as his dad said he was.
You don’t notice him looking, but Jos does. He waves Max over, and Max is glad for an excuse. His body gets up before he’s decided to, and he blinks furiously as he walks, trying to focus his thoughts enough to hold a conversation with you when he’s beginning to think he might-
“Maxy,” you say, grinning like it’s the first time you’ve seen him all night.
Fuck. Fuck.
Oh, fuck. The gin’s coming back. For a second he feels like he’s either going to ask you to marry him or vomit all over you.
“I’m leaving. She’s all yours,” Jos says, and Max steadies himself. His dad leans over and gives him one last hug before switching to Dutch. “Get her to bed. And yourself, also. You’ve still got to race tomorrow,”
Max nods and waves him off, closing his arms around you when you wobble, leaning into him for stability. Jos gives you a pat on the shoulder before disappearing into the crowd, and you teeter again, pushing you further into Max. The extra weight is like a balm on what is now a gaping, raw wound, with the nerves exposed. He will never recover from this.
You turn in his arms, scrunching your nose in displeasure as you look up at him. “I hate this hat,” you flick the brim of his World Champion cap. “Worst hat they ever made you. Next year, we do a better one,”
“Okay,” he says, chuckling as the hat leaves his head.
“Can I have this?” You’ve already put it on.
“Sure,”
Take it. Take my Valkyrie. Take the trophy. Take my last name.
“Why are you looking at me like that?”
He doesn’t know how he’s looking at you. Is it different than he looked at you two hours ago? Different then when you were 19?
He just shrugs, tipping the hat back for you, since it’s so big. “You’re drunk,” he yells over the music.
You lean in, so close that he’s intoxicated by the scent of your perfume, champagne, and Red Bull. He turns away from you slightly, because he’s had too much to drink to be this close to you.
“I know,” you whisper to him, your lips grazing his cheek as you talk. That’s not helping. He turns back to you, finding your eyes searching his. For the first time, he’s worried what you might see. Because you’ve always seen him too clearly. It was awful, then exhilarating, now it’s just fucking terrifying. Your eyes narrow and Max thinks you’re about to outright accuse him of wanting- “You’re supposed to be drunk, too,”
He laughs. He laughs at your pout, at getting away with it, for a little while longer, at least, and he laughs because on the night he’s won a world championship he realises he lost his heart a long time ago.
Loving you didn’t feel like a winning a race, it felt like driving in one. And after all, isn’t driving all he ever wanted to do?
“I am, Engel,” he says, “trust me, I am.”
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Grand Prix Elite Academy (3/10)
+18 | professor!Toto x reader fem!futuredriver, sewiss, carlos x reader
Summary: Your life turns 360 degrees after receiving your acceptance letter for the Grand Prix Elite Academy, the most exclusive and prestigious Formula One college designed to shape the future drivers of the motorsport world. You will try to navigate your new life among the Monaco elites, survive the campus dynamics and rivalries between the university faculties, and try to win this year's cup to beat an undefeated Mercedes while trying to befriend your eclectic driver classmates, join the wild Red Bull parties, have a couple of make-outs under the racing circuit benches, lose your v-card and get over that stupid crush you have on professor Toto. Will you make it alive to graduation? Drive to Greatness!
Genre: Romance, smut, and comedy.
Author's note: This is a Formula One college AU fanfiction set in an elite academy in Monaco, where the F1 Teams are Faculties, their Team Principals are professors, the FIA is the college board, and all the grid drivers are your classmates. You are accepted under a scholarship program that supports young, talented girls, having lots to catch on to after years of putting your racing dreams on hold and becoming the new girl in class, which is always challenging, especially when all of you share one campus.
Masterlist: all chapters here
Chapter 3: Know Your Frenemies
When you finally make it back to your dorm room after a physically exhausting day, fuck that new workout class sure is intense!
To your dismay, you find the place in total chaos: expensive-looking designer clothes everywhere and a group of stylish people occupying all the space. Shoes, makeup kits, bags, and more are on all available surfaces.
Who are these people, and what are they doing here? You have NO IDEA.
But, gosh! You only wanted quietness to rest and decompress, not this circus you are surprised with when you open the dorm's entrance door.
Soon, you find out it's Naya's glam squad. They are polishing the details for her upcoming Teen Vogue photoshoot.
The two of you couldn't be more opposite.
One of their team members confused you with a delivery person as you walked in since they ordered takeout, which is rude!
Then Naya introduces you to them, but no one seems to pay you more attention than necessary as you close the door and cross the common ground to your room; not even a nice meeting you! gets exchanged.
Fucking rude, they are the intruders here!
-
About an hour later, you sense Naya sliding the large glass door to the balcony where you are, the one facing the sea.
You are sitting on one of the patio armchairs, enjoying the nightly fresh ocean breeze, finishing your "Further Math" essay, and enjoying a snack to help you not fall asleep. It indeed was a long day!
—You shouldn't be eating that crap! —Naya scolds you and gives a judging look at your bag of Cheetos as she pulls it out of your hands and into the bin, leaving you with just one in your hand. —If you want to make it into one of the good faculties, you need to stop eating this shit and start getting in shape!
Ouch, that last one hurt.
—Anyways, sorry about the chaos —Naya gives you the world's slightest smile. Human emotions aren't her thing, apparently.
—I get it. You are a superstar, so no worries.
—and I'm sorry about your mom; I lost mine too, in a different way, divorced parents; I never see her —Naya continues.
You get taken out by that comment, and by your clueless expression, she adds: —Torger told me about it —Naya explains. —Also, the part where you called him entitled rich man —a silence break comes along. —Girl!
—He was acting pretty rude!
—Maybe you took it to heart. Of course, it's a delicate subject, but Torger understands. He lost his father in the same way. He is just a very straightforward person!
—It doesn't give him the right. Please don't justify him.
—Maybe you are still too thin-skinned. Would you prefer it if Torger had told you mid-fly that the plane would crash or warned you beforehand? He did what he considered best for you.
—To act like an asshole?
—To be open honest with you. Frankly, it's a rare value around here.
—So I should be thankful to him, then? —you look at Naya and are now annoyed at her, too.
This is none of her business.
—No, I'm just saying you should think more before opening your mouth next time. It's just friendly advice; not all principals are as patient as him; under a scholarship, you don't want a report or get in trouble —Naya finishes the conversation with that before fondly patting your shoulder and informing you she is going to bed.
-
The breakfast buffet at the cafeteria is the most impressive one you have ever seen. There's just so much food!
Since it's about 6 am, Charles is sleeping, sitting next to you, head on the table, wearing a red dri-fit hoodie, not being hungry at all.
After around fifteen minutes of sharing breakfast with your new friends at the long table, you are impressed to see how much Lewis eats.
—How many more avocados are you going to eat? —you ask him with wide eyes.
Lewis mumbles something, mouth full of food that you interpret as "three more."
—Even his metabolism is fast! —Carlos jokes, finishing his bowl of berries.
As you all catch up about each other's weeks, you tell them about the Toto incident.
—I mean, it is private, isn't it?! Why Naya has to know about it?! It was a private conversation! —you mumble as you violently smash your scrambled eggs around and ask Leandra to pass you the bread before leaving it on the table again. —Why am I eating carbs?! Jesus!
They all look at you with funny expressions. Carlos tries so hard not to laugh. —You look so cute when in a crisis! —he lets you know, smiling fondly at you. Those sweet, damn big Bambi eyes make your mornings better.
—Nothing is private between those two. —Seb lets you know, looking nonchalant as if this is a common thing that happened, and as he bites the slice of avocado Lewis' is offering with his fork to his mouth.
Something clicked in Lewis's head at the sound of Toto's name. Purposely, he ignored the entire conversation and, for sure, the fact that Naya is now part of your life, not precisely by choice.
—Shit, Y/N! Right! What's your student PIN? I'll text you the invite —Lewis asks you suddenly and a bit out loud. Seconds later, after you two exchange information, a new DM pops up in your GPEA app.
It's a link to an IP address website; you enter it, and a fancy and cool as fuck video shoot, professionally shot and styled of Lewis as half a demon and half an angel, shows up along with a digital invite.
Of Saints and Sinners
Which one are you?
A Lewis Hamilton Birthday Party
Saturday 7th, 1:00 am, Buddha-Bar Monte-Carlo
Follow etiquette attached
Admission reserved
RSVP
You download the unique access QR code generated to be admitted to the party. It is attached with an agreement on the dress code for the party and all the logistics info in case you arrive there by yacht, helicopter, or car.
This is a lot! Ordinary people just text you the address and hour of their parties. God, now you are in desperate need of Leandra to hook you up with a nice outfit.
Lewis tells you, in case you need clarification on the website: —My birthday party is next week, and you are invited.
—All his parties are iconic —Leandra adds while refilling her green juice.
—And super exclusive —Lewis takes pride in it. —But I know many people, so don't expect a small gathering!
—People kill for that access QR code he just sent you —Sebastian states.
—Then thank you so much for inviting me! —you say wholeheartedly, and Lewis sweetly smiles back at you.
-
—Jesus, a lot of me is on display! —you let out as you look at your reflection in the large mirror in Leandra's dorm room while you stare at you behind.
Never in your life have you worn such a short skirt and such high heels. Leandra is thinner than you, so her two-piece white Miu Miu mini-skirt glittery see-through dress is even shorter on you, barely covering your ass, and because you are wearing the tiny matching panties, a lot of skin going on for you.
But she looks so delighted by how you are pulling the outfit.
—What?! You look so good; all boy's eyes will be on you —she reassures you as she continues applying bronzer on your cheeks and doing the final touches.
—Yes, because all of me is out and about!
Your hair looks so voluptuous and shiny, and you are so in love with it! You had no idea it could look like that! The two of you are finishing getting ready for Lewis' party, and "Angel" obviously suits you better.
—Oh, come on! Don't be such a prudest! —by looking at your hesitant and bit insecure look, Lea adds. —But I can give you one of Charles' Rick Owens white pants if you feel more comfortable wearing them on top instead of the skirt; you can slay that look, too.
—Hilarious —you say sarcastically.
—No, seriously, sometimes I wear Charles' pants. He is really petite!
—Oh, good to know in case I have a no-pants crisis!
You both laugh aloud.
—That's it, my masterpiece is complete —she informs you as she slowly steps away and looks you over.
You turn to take a complete look at your outfit, hair, and makeup. You look like a doll in the most flattering and sexy way!
—WOW
—Yeah, wow.
—I feel like I should pay you! I owe you one, bestie.
Leandra waves her refined hand at you, dismissing your comment.
Lea looks like the hottest demon you will not sell but gift your soul to. She is rocking a Vivian Westwood skin-tight, latex, corset mini dress that fits her silhouette perfectly, accentuating her curves, irs bright red with Victorian details, making her boobs look bigger and better than ever, along with iconic platform heels and genuine pearls necklaces; her hair is sleekly style up.
—Let's mother off that party! —she lets out loud and clear as she picks up her purse and starts checking its contents. —CHARLES! WE ARE READY! CHARLIEEE! —no answer came —I hate it when he puts the headphones on; I'm sure he is playing the electric drums again! I will get him!
You two exit her room to their common grounds when you notice you left your power bank at your dorm and want to scream at the clouds.
—FUCK!! Lea, I'm going to my room to pick up my junk!
—WHAT? —she screams at you from afar. —WAIT!
As she returns to your side now with Charles, he looks you up from all angles, nodding his head non-stop. —I approve! —he gives you a thumbs up.
You laugh and blush at this interaction. —I forgot my fucking power bank and didn't charge my phone like the idiot I am; we need to go quickly to my room.
—Sure, that's no problem. We still have time, but move it, people! —Leandra starts pushing you two out and turning off the lights on your way out.
-
—Let me guess!! Leandra came up with the "Like a Virgin" concept for your outfit. It suits you —Naya tells you from the couch, where she reads a novel in a comfy-looking outfit as you exit your bedroom with a charger and power bank in hand.
Your eyes widen at her words. Shit, she hit a sensible spot. How does she keep doing that?!
She senses you tensing. —Wait! Are you?! Are you still a? Are you a virgin?!
You go red as fuck. Naya looks astounded.
—Oh, I was messing around, I didn't know. I didn't mean it! You look good, Y/N. Well, then, you really need that angel to go down to hell. Have fun!
The desperate need you feel now to ask her, "Hey, you aren't going?" starts to overpower you. Now that she knows an intimate detail about you, you want to know one about hers. But for sure, she already noticed you became close to Lewis; she is not dumb enough to fall for it and spell out what happened.
—I will, thanks. See you!
-
The limousine Lewis sent to pick up all his GPEA friends stops before you three. You are the last ones to get on it.
The looks everyone gives you as you get in are priceless. Max eyebrows go almost to the roof of the car. —You almost made my nose bleed —he jokes, but he is a bit pinkish on the cheeks. —You look gorgeous.
—You look like a fairy who works as a hooker —Pippa tells you fondly. It's pretty accurate.
To Yuki's amusement, Lando dramatically drops himself on the car floor to pretend to kiss your feet.
Charles throws himself over Max to annoy him and starts messing Max's hair around, acting all stupid before the first round of shots. Dances, alcohol, and Inna's old hits songs turn up the mood of the road trip to Monte Carlo.
When you arrive at the venue, the waiting line of cars for the dropoff point is long, but it goes faster than expected, thanks to the partying inside the limousine.
You already feel a bit tipsy when you all hit the red carpet and start throwing poses and doing group photos.
Then you get the welcoming mezcal shots as one of the hot hostesses greets you.
-
The place is exotic and chic. The red walls match the décor, which features subtle mixtures of gilded moldings and ancient sculptures. The crowd is on fire as the welcoming DJ's set plays.
You make your way through the many hot-looking angels and devils, hand in hand with Lea, following her around, looking for Lewis to wish him a happy birthday before things spin out of control as the night goes on.
You find him sitting on a lounge sofa near a giant Budha statue with a beautiful blond girl in his lap, instantly making your blood boil, thinking about sweet Sebastian, and you feel you are about to protest when you give a second look and really pay attention.
As soon as she sees you, the girl gets on her feet and welcomes you with a warm hug.
—I'm glad you could make it with such short notice! —Seb greets you.
—Wow, you genuinely are a beautiful angel! No worries! You didn't think I was going to miss this? —you stare at him in awe. His entirely covered-in-crystals embroidered dress is stunning, and the high heels make him look even more like a Victoria's Secret angel. His makeup is on point!
—You look so good that you almost made me feel straight —Seb jokes with you, but he means it.
—Which is a lot to say! —Lewis jokes, reaching you two and wrapping Seb in his arms, placing a hand on his ass. —You look fine —he gestures to you with his hand to spin for him. —Like FINE!
—Happy Birthday! —Leandra and you interrupt him with a hug attack, giving him lots of kisses and throwing around him the golden confetti you brought especially to do this.
—Thank you, my girls! I will meet you later at your table. We still have some things to do, right baby? —Lewis lets you know while placing small and slow kisses on Seb's lips.
You aren't sure if it's sad or honest that the last party you had with these guys was the best party of your life. So naturally, you feel really excited about how the night will unfold.
-
—Damn, you two look good —Carlos lets out aloud, biting his lip while peeking.
Carlos is bare-chested and wearing a red harness around his shoulders. His skin is glowing, his hair is messy and wet, and his tight satin red pants suit him nicely.
You can't avoid the tingle you feel at how crazy hot he looks.
—Close your mouth —Leandra jokes with you. —Thank you, Carlos. It's the new squats routine that hottie has made me do; speaking of him, have you seen the trainer around? I'm not losing my off-campus shot with him; I have had my eye on him since day one.
—Yes, he is on that table near the exit —he points Lea where. —He came as the porniest angel you could picture.
—Mmm, delicious, those tiny shorts make him justice —Leandra follows the trainer with his gaze before letting you know she will meet you later.
—We are about to light up some in case you want to join us —Carlos offers you, but you politely decline. —I will meet you at our table then —he kisses your cheek very close to your mouth. You don't protest, and you look him walk his way to Charles and Max.
-
To your good fortune, as soon as you reach your table, you want to throw yourself out the window. Spread there on the curved sofa, to your delight, is Toto wearing a see-through wine red shirt, leaving non to the imagination, with tailored matching red pants and pointy porny shoes.
Good-ass, expensive men's shoes make you weak in the knees.
That devil turns you into a worshiper.
Toto has his eyes set to the side, looking over the party, looking bored by being alone at the table; it seems you two are the first to arrive.
When you start to feel the need to run away, he then turns his head around, probably sensing your eyes on him, and looks straight at you.
You aren't sure if the welcoming mezcal shots are playing tricks on your mind or if he totally scanned your every corner with his eyes.
You feel your cheeks going red as you shyly try to sit in the opposite extreme, trying not to reveal far more of yourself than you should. You try to sit as far away from Toto as possible, which is not that far since it is a small arched sofa.
—Hi —his deep voice greets you as the waiter in charge of your table approaches you two.
—Can I offer you guys something to drink?
Toto, with a devilish smile on his face, grins at the sexy waitress. —We will have whatever she has been drinking before getting here —he then turns to you.
—Ahem —you look at him blankly, a bit taken out.
—You have a reddish tint on your cheeks, but it's different from when you blush, so it must be the alcohol. I like the other better —Toto says.
That makes sense, but at the same time, it doesn't at all, so he pays you attention, huh? —I have been drinking the delicious mezcal you have been offering around —you answer looking directly at the waitress.
—Mezcal, it is, then —Toto addresses her, and she goes to get the bottle. —Feeling more at home now, Y/N?
—Yeah, it's been unbelievable.
—That's good, you little angel with wings and all.
You turn a bit to give him a better look at the golden sparkling mesh wings Pippa gave you. —It was a last-minute touch; my friend Pippa thought the wings suited me better than hers. She said they are more in-
—More innocent looking, yeah, you have that aura on you.
The waiter then returns, placing the bottle of mezcal on the metallic golden coffee table in front of you, along with a plate with tablespoons of salt and a line of small glasses filled with different juices. You have no idea what all that is for.
Toto then slowly slides on the couch to move next to you and explain, closing the distance between you and offering you what looks like concentrated orange juice.
—These are to spice the flavor of the mezcal. You sip them after drinking the mezcal to create a blend on your palate. Try it.
And you do. You start taking the mezcal and the juice a bit too much, and quickly, Toto stops you, placing his hand on your glass, preventing you from going all in.
—It's just a bit! For to be able to taste it! —He chuckles at the funny "Oh! Fuck!" expression you are doing. —Okay, I will do the same one. I will show you how.
Then, you two move on to the following five, having lots of fun.
To Toto's amusement, the last one tasted way too lemony, and acid made you shrug your nose and make faces. He starts laughing at your expense and showing that he is tipsy, too.
You now are walking on drunk territory.
—Stop it —you say, messing around and hitting Toto's bicep with your hand before your senses return and remember Naya's advice. Oh shit!— I'm sorry —you immediately change your tone and get serious, which he instantly picks up.
He comes closer to whisper in your ear. —We are off campus, don't worry —making all the tiny hairs in your neck stand up.
Then, you two move to the salts.
He places a tiny bit on the back of your hand. —Lick it —he instructs you, and you obey, feeling his eyes burning with every move of your tongue; you can't avoid it and dare to gaze straight at him as you slowly lick the spices.
It feels too intimate.
Then, completely surprising you, he licks the remaining salts out of your hand, his wet tongue making contact with your soft skin so that you don't waste them, and he is able to taste them, too.
And now it is your turn to do so, as he offers you the remaining salts in his hand. You feel Toto's warm skin under your tongue, and you can sense a bit of his knuckles and veins as you slowly slide, letting all the flavors into your system.
-
Suddenly, the lights dim, pinching your bubble and signaling the start of the much-anticipated live performance.
The guests quickly hush, moving their attention to the stage, where Lewis emerges from laser lights and a cloud of white smoke.
Wearing a dazzling white suit embroidered with rhinestones that seem to glow in the spotlight while wearing a smirk on his face, his brown eyes scan the crowd before grabbing the mic and screaming: —Let's dance this fucker off! —Lewis starts to jump energetically around while Gesaffelstein starts playing his set, making everyone go wild.
-
—Is that who I think it is? —Mick points out.
—What the fuck is Nico doing here? No way Lewis invited him —Lance answers.
—No way he sneaked in —Mick snaps back.
—You are right, but I can't believe it.
—What? That he had the nerve to show up dressed like an angel? —Mick jokes while rolling his eyes to the blonde.
-
Carlos comes to your table to steal you to the dance floor. Dancing the mezcal away makes you go back to your senses. As a new track unfolds, and you two move around, you look back at your table and notice Toto enjoying your moves from afar since lots of you is on display with every cadence.
-
When the group finally gathers, Leandra proudly lets you know she got fucked the hardest she has ever been fuck; the trainer was as good as she expected him to be. For sure, the entire bathroom, if not the whole club, heard her moan.
Then everyone starts to pass around a glass with an almost neon blue liquor, to which everyone sips a bit; you go for it, too.
After that you aren't sure how the rest of the night proceeded.
Still, you know you had a blast, as flashes of you dancing with Mick on top of the sofa, trying Seb's long hair blonde wig in the girl's bathroom while doing poses and snapping pictures with him in the mirror, Carlos telling you you make the hottest blonde, losing a heel somewhere, taking a shot that was placed between Pipa's tits, breaking a fight between two girls over Lando and more happenings come back to you.
At some point in the night, all goes blurry and kaleidoscopic; until you feel a warm embrace, a strong pair of arms picking up your body and feeling it pressured against a firm body as a warm touch in your ass holds your skirt in place, carrying you into the limousine where Charles and Leandra are as unconscious as you.
And Toto's dark eyes, that's the last thing you remember.
-
The following day, you all feel like trash.
You and Leandra are on Charles' bed, the three of you gathered there with the AC on to the lowest setting and the blackout curtains closed, like vampires rejoicing in the cold, wet dark.
Several empty bottles of electrolytes are lying on the floor in your attempts to hydrate again to feel better.
After sleeping, only God knows how many hours, you hear your stomach roar violently. —We should order takeout —you say in the roughest voice ever.
—Tai? —Lea proposes.
—Like noodles, or what?
As soon as you say that, Charles gets on his feet at the speed of light and storms off to the bathroom, barely making it. You two overhear him puking the life out of him.
Poor baby.
-
After spending Sunday on total repair, Monday feels like a brutal awakening, back to the routine and classes.
But something feels different this time; as you cross the gardens and navigate the hallways, you sense a lot of gazes set on you on your way to the main hall, making you feel paranoid.
"Okay, you need to calm down, girl."
But when you notice the whispering, you know something is not okay, and you find out what it is as soon as you reach your locker.
A sign welcomes you: "Is the sad rag looking for a sugar daddy? That's not such angelic behavior for this virgin." The sign is printed along with a crop-out photo of you licking Toto's hand. The picture is zoomed in, so there are no faces for the moment, just hands and tiny bits of your costume from that night.
You start to hyperventilate and panic and jump at the contact on your shoulder. You sense Sebastian next to you, reaching closer to comfort you.
—Everything is going to be okay. Easy. Breathe —Seb softly tells you.
When you two turn around to leave for class, you notice the couple of blondes standing by the end of the hallway, looking at you.
—It's always them, isn't it? —you let out between tears and rage.
—Yes —it's all Sebastian lets out, throwing daggers at them.
Great! Now, the entire academy knows you are a sad virgin who longs for an older man. Awesome.
Thank you for your patience and for sticking around! I hope you enjoyed the chapter. By the way, I edited a lot of the previous chapters! If you feel like reading them again, I strongly suggest it. A couple of things changed, but nothing too major, tho. Sorry! This story needed a bit of an edit.
#toto wolff x reader#toto wolff x you#toto wolff fic#toto wolff fanfic#toto wolff x y/n#toto wolff fanfiction#toto wolff#f1 fanfiction#f1 fanfic#mercedes fanfic#formula 1 fic#toto wolff imagine#f1 imagine#f1 x female reader#formula 1 au#formula 1 college au#formula 1 school au#sewis fic#f1 au#my fic writing#carlos x reader#carlos sainz x reader#toto wollf x oc#toto wolff x occ#f1 x you#f1 x reader#f1 x y/n#f1 x oc#mercbros
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Can I request headcanons for Raphael, Haarlep, and Zevlor being jealous of some guy is flirting with their female s/o although she's oblivious that he's flirting with her? He's so possessive that he even took her back home to have a heated make-out while holding her close & his tail wrapped around her leg!
I love a Possessive man. I'm not even going to lie. I always get asked if I met a guy in the books or fics I read how I would handle them. In theory, I would love it; in practice, I am a sassy beach and would probably not last.
HEADCANON~~~~~~Haarlep, Zevlor, Raphael
Haarlep-
He couldn't believe the fact he was so irate at this moment. Like he has never felt more than real lust since that was what he was incarnated for. Right now, though, it was as if he was a Demon of Wrath instead of a Demon of Lust.
How could you be so damn oblivious? You just sat there smiling with that stupid, adorable, cute smile.
You were perfect inside and out, something he didn't see in many people. You were the woman of his dreams. That wasn't an easy feat for a demon that could literally bed anyone.
You were his and his alone, so why was another demon standing so close to his woman.
(Haarlep would literally be the iconic TV trope of a partner breaking a champagne or wine glass in hand out of anger. Man is one for theatrics. Come on.)
It was all over after the demon talking to you touched your face to move some hair behind your ear. Before you could even process what was happening, Harrlep was on top of the other demon, practically torturing him.
Once Raphael dismissed and sent him on his way, he grabbed you and took you to his room.
Mans is a pacer when he fears his emotions are too big to handle right then.
Once calmed down, especially by your words, he just turned to you and, with no hesitation, kissed you passionately.
Let's be honest: Haarlep is a man of business. He doesn't play around.
As extra reassurance, you wouldn't leave him for three weeks straight; his tail was wrapped positively around your thigh or waist, constantly teasing you and testing others.
Zevlor-
I'm not going to lie. In my first playthrough, I punched Zevlor, so I can confidently say Mans is a big baby. He plays it off cool, but once his ego is hurt, he tanks Man, and it's so cute.
Watching the male tiefling flirt with you was literally hell on earth. Might as well have Avernus burning around him as you laugh at that stupid demon's jokes.
This party to celebrate your victory was supposed to be a night for you and him to sneak off and consummate your relationship before the long journey through the shadowlands. (If you know, you know, and I cry every time)
Man is more of a self-deprecating jealous than a wrathful jealous. So, unlike Haarlep, who just waits to explode, Zevlor is coming up with 1000 reasons why the other demon is so much better for you.
Zevlor becomes withdrawn and makes his way to his maps and equipment for the expedition, no longer interested in the party.
If he can't see his heart get broken, how can his heart get broken, you know?
However, what this man loved about you most was that you picked up on so many subtle clues. So, with little time between his self-deprecating and abandonment of the party, you were at his side.
The man couldn't even look you in the eyes. He was so sure he would fuck something up.
After some gentle coaxing, he finally listens to you and holds you so gently, kissing you fiercely and passionately.
(He may leave a few hickies or ten to really make sure everyone knew you were taken)
While on the road to Baldur's Gate, he never took his tail from around your waist. He kept you close and secure next to him.
God forbid the tiefling from the party even remotely gets too close to you. That tail might go to other places to prove a point.
Raphael-
He is far too prideful and egotistical to physically show anyone or anything in general how upset he is that another man is talking to you.
He would rather burn in hell under his father's thumb than admit he is jealous.
He knows at the end of the day, you are his. I mean, he had your soul. The first night you two consummated, he took it from you.
That didn't stop the nagging feeling he had watching you laugh, smile, and, in his eyes, flaunt what was his.
Being prideful, Raphael's approach to removing the threat was simple. He simply reminded everyone how powerful he really was.
All it took was a quick interjection into the conversation and not so-subtly informing the lingering demon about how his father was a king of hell.
Once the threat was taken care of, he turned to you. Oddly enough, with a simple, commanding look, you knew it was time to retreat to your shared quarters.
Before you could make it through the door fully, you were slammed against a wall, mouth covered by his.
By the end of the night, you had more marks covering your body than you cared to admit, but damn, at least everyone knew who owned you.
After that incident, at every gala or event he held, you were to sit on his lap with his tail wrapped firmly around your body.
If you behaved well, he would use his tail elsewhere, too.
I had a lot of fun writing this; when I first joined Tumblr many moons ago, this wasn't a huge thing, so this is my first time writing one of these. I really hope I didn't disappoint. Thank you so much to everyone from Annons to other blogs for the help and support in beginning my journey to writing! I appreciate all of you!
#baulders gate 3#bg3#bg3 x reader#raphael bg3#raphael#zevlor#zevlor bg3#zevlor x reader#bg3 zevlor#haarlep#bg3 haarlep#bg3 raphael#house of hope#raphael the cambion
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Regarding Stop Cop City, I agree it’s a pretty small-fry project that seems somewhat illogical to be devoting so much energy and militancy to. But on the other hand, there have been city protest movements devoted to saving a single tree before and I don’t think they were necessarily worthless. Even if it’s a small patch of forest, we need to save every tree we can.
And the point of making a big ruckus about one relatively small project is it raises the costs and makes authorities think twice about all their other similar small projects.
And finally I also think there’s just the fact that in the absence of a large left-wing party or organizational infrastructure, there’s not really any central decisionmaker deciding on which things to campaign against. Which things explode into a bigger issue is fairly random and arbitrary.
Similarly, as people have pointed out: the incidents of police brutality that provoke huge protests are not always the most egregious incidents. There have been a few even more horrific acts than what happened to George Floyd or Eric Garner (which to be clear were already extremely horrific), some even caught on video, that did not get as much attention and did not incite as much unrest. There’s no “line” that gets crossed that people just can’t take anymore. It’s random and unpredictable.
So I think Stop Cop City is not completely misguided though I do think it’s not strategically the most productive effort or the most urgent problem.
(But I could be wrong. And anyone attacking you over your opinion on this is a stupid fuck).
Even if it’s a small patch of forest, we need to save every tree we can.
And the point of making a big ruckus about one relatively small project is it raises the costs and makes authorities think twice about all their other similar small projects.
I think I tend to disagree on both these points - I am against deforestation writ large but I think there are plenty of times when I am okay with developing small forests for human use, though a training site for cops and firefighters is pretty meh as use cases go. I also am not sure if it really provides much benefit to force authorities to reconsider this kind of project.
I would not necessarily say I am against the cop city protestors in any meaningful way. Cops suck, fuck em, whatever. What I am strongly against is the lionization of picking your battles poorly on the left.
To my eyes the comparison to the George Floyd protests feels a little off - that struck me as a much more mass movement, whereas this feels more like a small group of highly dedicated protestors. I also think the central issue there was much more important, though to wrap back around, what happened to Tortuguita (the protestor that got killed by the cops, likely while sitting down with their hands up) seems far more egregious than the construction project.
I am kind of a crank about this kind of thing, but it raises my hackles when people treat protest or "resistance" or militancy as ends unto themselves. I think the causes we fight for and the ends we achieve matter immensely, and I don't think stopping cop city matters that much, so it bugs me to hear people talk about it in the same breath as the 2020 protests or the current ones for Gaza.
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TICK // 3.1 - mary jane's last dance
Rating: mature (1 homophobic slur, angst, language, sexual content)
Word Count: 1900
☾
She grew up in an Indiana town
Had a good lookin' mama who never was around
But she grew up tall and she grew up right
With them Indiana boys on an Indiana night
☾
December 1983 - junior year
Don't be a stranger, okay?
Sure. See ya, Munson.
You lied to his face. You had every intention of being a stranger.
All you wanted was the tattoo. You forked over the cash and bailed. Like a ghost. It was kind of your specialty… your version of "arm's distance" was a regular person's dozen football fields.
Three months had passed and snow was threatening to fall upon Hawkins, Indiana. No one in town seemed to be looking forward to the hopes and dreams of 1984, though. An air of tension and secrecy cast a shadow over the entire cursed town.
You could feel it. You could see it in the faces of your peers. But you couldn't quite place what was going on underneath the layers. Yeah, that Will Byers kid disappeared and came back. Barbara Holland was still missing. Gossip flowed among the high school students, and you received most of your information from Robin.
You, being the eldest Buckley spawn, were not stupid. But you also weren't about to speculate conspiracy theories with just anyone and become the town lunatic. So you continued to observe.
Plus, out of everything morbid that happened in Hawkins, a few halfway pleasant things rose above it.
After a request by Nancy Wheeler to study together for French, you quickly realized that Nance was someone you genuinely liked to be around. She was kind, honest, and straight to the point.
One thing led to another, and you were no longer just an acquaintance of Wheeler, her boyfriend Harrington, and the rest of the popular kids. You were a regular participant among their group of friends.
It was disgustingly easy to remain shallow and discreet while surrounded by people who couldn't hold a conversation to save their lives. The nagging feeling that some of them were hiding deep dark secrets kept you curious, too.
Jonathan Byers, who you had classes with for quite some time, approved of Nancy Wheeler as well. So that only solidified the merging friendship between the popular kids and the kids sitting right on the edge of being outcasts.
Speaking of outcasts, you completely ignored Eddie Munson and his troop of misfits.
Sure, you were appreciative of the tattoo. Sure, he crossed your mind every time you looked at it. Which, 99% of the time, happened when she was undressing.
Don't be a stranger, oka-
"What the fuck!" you hissed quietly to yourself, angrily smashing at the overcooked peas on your lunch tray.
Nancy's head popped up from her magazine. "Everything okay, Y/N?"
"Huh? Oh, yeah. Just thinking about Grossman's midterm for History."
Just as Nancy was about to respond with an empathetic expression, a pair of hands landed heavily on your shoulders, making you jump slightly.
"How about we forget all about finals, midterms… whatever."
Steve Harrington, followed by Tommy H., appeared before you two girls. Tommy H. smirked in your direction, sending a not-so-subtle wink.
"There's a party happening this weekend at the Walker farm. You know, the old barn? This time of year the whole place is abandoned," Steve continued. "I think it'll be fun."
Casting a fleeting look to Nance, you thought she looked apprehensive.
"Won't it be cold?"
Steve placed an arm casually around Nancy's dainty shoulder. "Don't worry, Negative Nancy. I'll keep you warm."
☾
Well, I don't know but I've been told
You never slow down, you never grow old
I'm tired of screwing up, tired of goin' down
Tired of myself, tired of this town
☾
Beer in your mitten-clad hand, you linked elbows with Nancy as her eyes scanned the crowd.
However they managed to pull off a party in an abandoned barn was a mystery. But you were genuinely happy - you finally got to show off your new knitted hat and scarf. Not to mention an alcoholic beverage to take the edge off. And you had Nance, who, for once, wasn't worried about Steve.
The distance between Steve Harrington and Nancy Wheeler was visible only to those who were the most attentive. You recalled them being up each other's asses for a long time. Then after autumn passed, there seemed to be a wall between them, slowly being built brick by brick.
"Thank you for coming with me, Y/N. I don't know if I would have come here without you."
You smiled at the curly-haired girl. "Hey, you're kinda stuck with me now. We're the only ones with IQs above average."
You felt guilty for a second as Nancy's eyes fell in a flicker of grief. You knew your friend was thinking of Barb.
Squeezing her elbow, you led Nancy over to a couple of vacant folding chairs.
There were a lot more people than you originally thought would attend. Electric lamps were plugged into the corners, a table set up with a keg and bottles of random shit. Music was playing from a stereo that you couldn't quite see.
Though the barn was empty of any farm equipment, it was a well-built structure, and held a decent amount of warmth from the December winds blowing outside. Typical Indiana redneck party.
"Well, if it isn't Buckley."
From behind, a pair of hands grabbed your hat and jerked it down over your eyes.
"Seriously?"
Pushing the knitted hat back up to your forehead, you found yourself looking into those deep brown orbs you had been avoiding for months.
"Surprised to see you in my neck of the woods," Eddie exclaimed in his usual dramatic fashion, looking between you and Nancy, then down to your feet. "Is that cow shit on your boot?"
Yanking up your boot in a panic, you inspected the heel and found nothing but a bit of hay. Eddie was fucking with you.
You glared at him and dropped your boot to the floor with a dull thud. Vaguely aware of Nancy's attention to the conversation, you played it off like you didn't know him.
"Can I help you, freak?"
The smirk fell from Eddie's lips, replaced with cold disappointment. What the hell were you doing? Not only did you ignore the boy for months, but then once he got the balls to talk to you first, your first instinct was to be like this?
What really twisted the knife was the fact that Eddie said nothing. He just shook his head and walked away, one of his friends following him with a hushed voice.
Before Nancy could comment, you turned to her. "I bet I can chug my beer faster than you."
"What?"
"Come on, Nance. Robin said she'd come pick us up if we need her to."
A pause, then a small smile.
"Let's do it."
☾
Oh, my, my, oh, hell yes
Honey, put on that party dress
Buy me a drink, sing me a song
Take me as I come 'cause I can't stay long
☾
Two beers.
Before your second beer was done, you somehow ended up in a game of truth or dare with a bunch of drunk douchebags. You could spot Nancy with Steve, over by the keg, laughing over something he was saying.
"Well? Truth or dare, Buckley?"
"I think she's gonna chicken out. Does she even talk?"
Tommy H. fixed his eyes on you from a few feet away. Holding a fresh can of beer, you cracked it open and feigned some kind of backbone for these reckless social activities.
"Truth."
A couple of guys groaned at your answer, probably hoping that you would opt for a dare instead.
Tommy sucked his teeth, thinking of a clever question. A pit of dread was forming in your stomach, suddenly wishing you had succumbed to some stupid dare instead. Why would you want any of these people to know anything about you?
"When… who was the last person you banged?"
At least ten different pairs of eyes were looking at you, all of them basically strangers. Tommy smirked at his so-called "originality".
It pissed you off. You felt defensive, on edge. But your frigid exterior gave away nothing. You could hear whispers from some girls nearby, despite the rock music echoing around them.
"Told you she was a prude."
Without thinking, delusion and anger taking over, you took a long sip of your beer and looked Tommy dead in the eye. You mirrored his smirk.
"You really want to know?"
Tommy shrugged. "Why the fuck else are we playing this game, Buckley?" He turned towards a girl sitting next to him. "I think I was right. I think she's a dyke just like her sister."
You stood up and chugged the rest of your beer. You immediately whipped the can at Tommy's face, then stormed off before you could see his reaction.
"What the fuck!" was all you heard as you made your way towards the small door at the side of the barn.
Panting a little, you squatted against the outside wall of the old barn, leaning your head back against it. The darkness of the cornfields before you filled you with mild peace.
Then, an unwelcome voice sounded from your left, in the shadows.
"Sunshine, I'm gonna be honest with you. That wasn't exactly the reunion I was hoping f-"
"Can't I get two fucking seconds of silence?" you snapped.
Shivering, you didn't bother looking at Eddie. You heard a heavy sigh from him, and thankfully no more attempted conversation.
You did your best to forget about the insults to your baby sister, to your family, forgetting all of those people inside that just wanted the latest juicy gossip. Hawkins was such a fucked up place.
You held your secrets close to your chest like a crux.
You led a compartmentalized life. Your parents knew a minimal part of you. Your friends knew a bigger part of you. Robin knew most of you.
And Eddie had his own part now, too. Even if it was a splinter.
Two beers.
Two. Fucking. Beers.
That's all it took for you to gather up the guts that were just ripped out of you. You gathered up your scorned innards, scooped up the blood and flesh as best as you could, and crawled over to where Eddie was sitting on an upside down trough.
☾
There's pigeons down on Market Square
She's standin' in her underwear
Lookin' down from a hotel room
The nightfall will be comin' soon
☾
The last thing Eddie ever expected was for you to be kneeling between his legs.
Before he had a chance to wonder what you were doing, what you might be thinking, or whatever the hell happened in that barn, you placed a gloved hand over his cold mouth.
"For the love of all that is holy, please don't talk."
His muffled ramblings continued. "Okay, but-"
"Eddie, I need another favor. Nod if you understand."
Not really knowing what else to do, he nodded. In the almost pitch black surroundings, he could barely make out your sparkling eyes locked on his.
"I need you to keep another secret."
Knees on the frozen ground, not another soul in sight, you lifted yourself just slightly enough to press your lips to his.
☾
Last dance with Mary Jane
One more time to kill the pain
I feel summer creepin' in and I'm tired of this town again
☾
(song lyrics credit: "Mary Jane's Last Dance" by Tom Petty)
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#eddie munson#eddie munson x reader#eddie munson smut#eddie munson fanfic#eddie munson fanfiction#eddiemunson#eddie munson x female reader#stranger things#eddie munson slow burn#eddie x you#eddie munson x you#eddie x fem!reader#eddie munson x buckley!reader
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professional help, c7. Beware of the dog.
simon riley x original character.
trigger warnings: violence, sexual assault, mentions of rape, trauma, sexual themes, swearing, use of alcohol and drugs, EDs and death.
song to listen to when reading this: Dark red, Steve Lacy.
abstract: Simon. I don't fucking know what to say about this chapter, I was moving in autopilot. and I'm just being a decent fucking human being, what do you expect me to say really? just start reading already.
She took a look around. The men in the room were looking at her like she was gonna spontaneously combust and explode. Some of them had their lips pressed in a thin line. I'm sorry Jude, this is the part fo the movie where you die! Simon on her right was frowning, his eyebrows slightly peering through his mask. She started imagining if she just left right now. Took her dog, got to the airport and moved to Spain. The Maldives, maybe. She started a new life as a new person once at 18, she could do it again now seven years later. Or maybe she just needed to go home, smoke every little bit of weed she had left, curl up in bed and die. She started laughing. She had always thought her laugh was the most awful sound in the word. She started laughing, she looked psychotic. She hid her smile with her right hand through her head back. Her voice was the only sound in the room, ripping apart the air. It was a terrifying sight. Fuck me sideways. How could she be so stupid to get back to that job in the first place, after what happened in 2021. 'Oh God…' she sighed when she regained a little bit of control over her laughter which still lingered in the air like a distorted melody. She was still smiling. The first time he saw her smile, laugh even. It sounded real, she sounded genuinely delighted.
Simon decided he wanted nothing to do with her right in that moment. She scared him to death, who knew a woman could be this attractive and scary at the same time. Price seemed to think showing her the calendar wasn't a good idea after all and quickly took the piece of paper and pushed it to the side. 'Look Jude, we're gonna escort you home, it's gonna be fine, we're going to continue to look for him until we have to leave.' He was trying to calm her down and, frankly, she looked perfectly fine. She looked like she was at a dinner party with her favourite friends, a glass of Champaign in her hand, her eyes shining with little tears of joy from laughing too much. Except, she laughed because she was scared. 'I've seen this film before, captain', she said, her words sounded venomous. Her eyes were dark, filled with sorrow and regret. Something like this happened before, and the captain knew.
'No, I'm telling you, it will be fine.' Price was trying to convince her. 'Gentlemen, we have an early flight tomorrow, we're going to keep looking for Arash until we find something and we'll brief again at nine, tonight. If they know we're coming, things might get ugly.' Jude was no where to be found. Well, she was still in the room, but her smile left space to an expression of defeat, like she had accepted her fate. Her eyes didn't look as bright, she kept wiping the palm of her hands on her thighs. Simon had noticed. His eyes locked with the captain's and they understood each other. Take her away, this was the sign. He quickly turned towards her, slouching downwards to speak closer to her. 'Let's go Jude', he instructed. She didn't look up at him, keeping her eyes low, but made her way to the door. He was walking beside her matching her speed. 'Take your car, I'll follow you' he said, and she still didn't answer.
'Jude' he called and finally she looked at him 'What!?' She raised her voice. She was mad again. Like the first time he saw her, fists curled with rage, on the verge of tears. He tried to keep his voice as gentle as he could. 'It's alright, everything's going to be fine', he tried to talk to her like he would do in an hostage rescue situation. 'I'll get you home. I know how to do my job', he reassured. He thought knowing he knew what to do might make her feel better. She nodded and quickly walked to her car. He followed her car all the way to the city, trying not to lose her in traffic. She parked in a busy residential street and he quickly followed. When she got out she looked for him, and waited for him to get out of the truck. She trusted him. Not because he was someone special, but from what she'd gathered he was someone Price trusted, he was probably good at his job. And he seemed kind.
'This way' she said, making her way to her apartment. She gave him her keys, he made his way to the door and got his gun out of the holster. He then noticed the little sign on the side of the door. 'Beware of the dog'. 'You scared of dogs?' she asked quietly, appearing on his side like the angel on his shoulder. Under his shoulder, let's say. Now, was he afraid of dogs, no. Did he have the best relationship ever with animals? Focus, you have a job to do, kill the dragon, save the princess. 'Stay back'. He opened the door and peered through with his gun drawn. The only sound that came from inside was a loud bark and paws on the floor. The puppy greeted him by sniffing his feet, his tail was wiggling. Not much of a guard dog, was it a German Shepard? The lights were out in the apartment, Jude made her way inside and flicked them on. She looked around and everything seemed as she left it. 'Ciao, si ciao' she spoke to the dog, who was clearly excited to see her, whining and stomping his paws. Simon tried to remember the words she said, so he could guess her native language. Spanish?
He looked around her living room and kitchen. Her house resembled her personality. There were books scattered on the coffee table, at least 5 of them, an empty mug as well. Books and papers on the sofa as well, maybe she was studying something? Black big reading glasses, with huge lenses. There were posters on the walls, art he didn't recognise. Nothing much on the shelves, minimal decor. A tall lamp in the corner of the room. He noticed a polaroid picture with someone with short hair. So you do have a boyfriend… Her kitchen was clean. It was a nice kitchen, she didn't have a table but two stools under a kitchen isle which probably served as a counter too. It was connected to the wall. Again, folders and scattered papers, maybe work. The dog bed on the floor. A lot of plants, he didn't think they were fake. An ashtray next to the window. Smoker? 'Can I check the other rooms?' he asked. To be respectful, you know. She nodded and he made his way to her bedroom. The door was closed. He glanced around the room, he checked the toilet as well. The bed wasn't made. She had light blue bedding. The room smelled like her, like lavender. She had a stuffed animal on the bed, a sheep. She had fuzzy slippers, probably a size 5. On the wall, more posters. He noticed a painting of a scary dog's fangs. Books on the nightstand, books on the wooden window sill. He saw a bra hanging from a chair and that was his cue to leave. In the toilet, one single toothbrush. So… no boyfriend?
'All clear'. She was standing beside the door, her dog at her feet was licking her hand while she petted him lazily. 'Thanks' she offered him a smile, a tiny one. She looked more relaxed. They stood looking at each other for a few seconds. Until he couldn't hold it in any longer. 'What happened last year?' He saw her expression darken, her shoulders tense. Who do you think you are to ask like that? She straightened her back and let go of the dog. He remained at her feet, wanting attention. 'You should learn to mind your business.' She made her way to the kitchen. She passed by him and didn't make eye contact. 'You should have some respect when you talk to people’ he answered. He didn't have time for this. He was fucking stupid to think he could speak with her, actually acting like a 10 year old. The dog came closer to him and sniffed his shoes. 'You know where the door is.' She turned around and faced the sink. He could feel a switch in her voice, in her attitude. It was Jude and then Her, her real self, whoever she was. It was two different people. The girl saw kindly smiling at Gaz in the car wasn't the same girl that barged in their briefing room demanding they listen to her. Or maybe it was, maybe that was Jude, and the scared, damaged little thing that he took home a year prior was Her. He didn't know who. Jude was Ghost and She was Simon. Something very bad had happened back then. Maybe it just wasn't meant to be, he wasn't meant to know, no matter how much he tried. She raised a wall in between them. She made the weather right outside the apartment turn to when it's about to rain. Thunderstorms and lighting kind of rain. And it was probably better this way. He turned around without saying a word, only careful not to let the dog out.
She started breathing again when he left. Her mouth was dry, she was sweating. She called the dog and gave him food. She lit a cigarette and sat by the window. She called in the dance school, saying she had a fever. This way, she could stay inside all weekend. It took her forty minuted to stop shaking. Images from that day replayed in her mind at least once every three days now. She had gotten better, but that thingh wasn't really something you recover from. She sometimes woke up in the middle of the night sweating and crying, feeling the blade of the knife on her skin. She had dreams she had died. She wished she never woke up for a long time. She had dreams about the way he touched her. The first five months after it happened she would bite her nails till the cuticles bled and not shower for days. Her own hands on her skin felt like his. The first time she talked to another human being was when she visited Salvo in San Francisco. She looked like a corpse. He was speechless and hated her for letting herself go like this. It wasn't just the eating and over exercise, which he knew were her preferred coping mechanisms. She had lost interest in living, in speaking, in watching movies, reading. Her career… He held her every night, they slept intertwined in his room, he was the first man that actually showed her respect. He was the first man she touched after that day, she hugged him and rested her head on his chest while he reminded her she was loved, she was important to him, she was alive. He would caress her hair when she woke up sweating and was patient with her when she wouldn't eat. This time was different, she was going to be fine. Even if Salvo wasn't there. Arash would not find her, the memories from last year would leave her alone. She would make it once again.
notes. translation: 'Ciao, si, ciao.' means 'hi, yes, hi.'
notes: Salvatore, i want a friend like you, KING. I am back, I'm sorry for the delay I got surgery done to my teeth??? Anyways, enjoy!!!
taglist:
@ummmmmwat @ghostlythots @sweetfemmefatal @natxpat @chavarriakeren647 @ravenmoore14 @farther-than-pleiades @internallyscreamings @hwromi @atoxicrat @cuti3maddi3 @deafeningkittenblaze @its-celeste @serene-hills @lexidoll12 @poohkie90 @lunatiquess
@warmedbythebody @katzykat @iristhemuse @azkza @keiraslayz @abbyandermine @jennyjencakes @dest-nai @corset-briefs @nutze-kekse @ilytsukiw @b3anspr0ut
@pondsblog @missyouzoe @fallenkitten @bigauthorrascalturkey @bethtay @angelynn-nicole @starluv @stargirlisworld @giyuuslittleslut @impossiblecupcakelight
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#cod mw2#ghost cod#simon ghost riley#cod x reader#ghost fanfiction#call of duty#simon ghost x reader#cod fic#cod modern warfare#ghost headcanons#simon riley fluff#simon riley fanfic#simon riley#ghost mw2#ghost call of duty#ghost riley#simon ghost smut#simon ghost fluff#simon riley call of duty#mw2 ghost#call of duty x reader#141 headcanons#task force 141#tf 141#cod 141#cod#john soap mactavish#captain john price#captain price#modern warefare 2 x reader
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wait I need to hear about the Daniel Lestat parallels
in answering your question i ended up typing a lot about a lot of things... some of which i think is pretty good and some of which is messy nonsense. enticing sneak preview:
daniel and lestat's similarities
the show overall as a story about how substance abuse affects families
how daniel mirrors both louis and lestat as a husband and as a father
facts, conjecture, and lots of theories about different aspects of daniel's backstory:
how antoinette may parallel armand, madeleine, and daniel's daughter
how daniel might mirror claudia???
like lestat, daniel can be pretty arrogant. they both love to lecture. "this is just how it is, listen to me, i would know! i have so much experience and knowledge to share." classic old white man behavior. hell, they're both old bisexual white men even. like lestat, daniel doesn't think of himself as racist but is still throwing microaggressions at both louis and armand.
daniel & lestat, danlou & loustat
lestat and daniel are both judgmental of some of louis's life choices (though usually different ones) and are not shy about saying so. they both make faces at louis eating animals—daniel also just louis eating in general ofc. but WE KNOW he still secretly thinks it's sexy and is also perhaps a bit jealous when louis is drinking from a hot guy, much like lestat. (don't pick the jacked sailor louis!!! great aesthetic but NO.)
so personality-wise, daniel is a combination of both louis and lestat. (he even has some claudia in him with his quest for the truth. i bet claudia would love to be a journalist, digging up dirt on people, exposing corruption! she's already a prolific writer too. but i'm getting sidetracked.)
both loustat and danlou are fond of each other, attracted to each other, but are also constantly bickering, sometimes in all good fun and sometimes not.
we see daniel yelling at louis in the show, and he's always yelling at armand in devil's minion. like lestat, he has a lot of anger in him. i bet he could throw a punch too back in the day. and while i don't think he was abusive to his wives, we know he wasn't a good husband either. especially while he was using.
and this is where we get to the most important parallel between them: lestat's "overindulgence" in killing is analogous to substance abuse. of course drinking too much blood doesn't actually make him act the way he does, but what happens in the show is still very reminiscent of the way alcoholism and drug abuse contributes to relationship problems. the substance itself doesn't lead to abuse, but it exacerbates things.
human blood is drugs actually
in the books, lestat talks about getting drunk a lot when he was human. louis calls himself a drunk too, and in the show their relationship starts by them going out all night almost every night. then they start going out every night to drink human blood. louis feels pressured to drink in order to please lestat, but eventually he wants to cut back. lestat is angry, telling louis it's stupid, there's nothing wrong with drinking, it's pointless, it's gonna be so hard, you won't be able to do it. and of course he feels like it's an attack on his own blood drinking. louis doesn't ask lestat to quit with him, but out of respect for louis's choice, he doesn't drink around louis anymore. lestat starts having parties at the house all the time. louis is totally fine with it, he's there, it's fine, it's fun. at least until it starts to get out of hand. and then lestat's fucking around on him too. eventually louis has a big relapse, things get way out of hand, it costs him his job even, lestat's like lol welcome back! told you this would happen! so louis breaks up with him.
but whooops he comes back carrying a child. you know, in his arms! he really wants to keep the kid. lestat acquiesces. louis doesn't go back to drinking human blood, but he doesn't have to because lestat has a new drinking buddy, a 14-year-old girl! he gave her a taste and she loved it! yay! louis tries to warn her about potential consequences. he's had a lot of them. she was a consequence even, but a good one. but she likes drinking with lestat, and eventually she starts going out on her own. and it gets out of hand.
daniel is sober now, "like louis", but he had a big drug problem back in the day. louis asks him about the "best he ever had." black tar heroin is nothing compared to what lestat gave louis that first time. yeah, it's not just drinking, it's hard drugs that lestat gave his kids.
louis's family doesn't know what the hell he and lestat get up to all night but they know it's nothing good. he stopped coming over for months, even years, but one time he showed up, watched the baby for just a second, dropped him on the floor. he wasn't invited to the kids' birthday party cause they're afraid of him. he showed up late and broke the door. they cut him out entirely. are he and his... partner, the right kind of people to adopt?
one time the cops get called. they raid the house but the evidence is well hidden. mostly. they refrain on calling the child welfare league but they don't like what they see. louis and lestat lecture claudia; louis about the drugs themselves, lestat about not hiding her tracks well enough. and speaking of, are those track marks on her arms? we don't do that kind of thing in this house!
claudia tells louis he's the one who brought her into the house. enabled lestat to give her a taste. she leaves home, staying somewhere new every night. she's still using, on her own and in dangerous situations. eventually she returns home. it's safer with someone watching your back.
lestat and claudia say louis's abstaining comes off judgmental. so he starts using again too. they throw a big big party with great party favors. claudia puts something in lestat's.
in season 2 (and i'm spoiling the whole plot), claudia and louis will travel around looking for people who are into the same stuff. the ones they find are pathetic, living like trash. then they find a group having some real fun, big parties. louis's not into it, but he's into armand, who doesn't mind that he doesn't use as much. claudia will get sick of the parties but get louis to give this woman she meets a little taste like lestat did with her. but armand doesn't want claudia around. armand and louis will keep using together, meet a guy in a bar. give him a taste of the good stuff. eventually louis will want to cut back again, and armand accepts it, even helps him. but louis's not much fun anymore.
just this once, daniel is a step ahead of louis; daniel's second marriage has already fallen apart.
daniel and alice
daniel compares louis to his first wife when he tells her about her dyeing her eyebrow; she thinks she has a flaw and tried to cover it up, but daniel likes her the way she is. lestat treated louis's aversion to killing like a flaw, and louis internalized that, calling himself a botched vampire, but daniel likes that about him. louis is like alice in a way.
some wild conjecture: what if alice was an addict too? what if daniel somehow contributed to her addiction like lestat did with louis? what if alice stopped using like louis, while daniel continued like lestat? or maybe she never used any drugs, but started drinking due to strain on her marriage; a more indirect cause. and what about the kids? what if, like claudia becoming a blood drinker like her parents, daniel's kids ended up inheriting his addiction too? becoming alcoholics as teens or adults? or maybe it affected them even more directly, like one of them accidentally ingested something he left lying around, and almost died like claudia? okay, that got dark... maybe daniel avoided getting his kids directly involved, perhaps by simply not being around much, and that's one of the differences between their stories. narrative foils aren't supposed to be identical after all, just further the same themes. a parent's substance abuse affects the children, one way or another. we don't know the details, but like lestat's fledglings, daniel's kids don't talk to him anymore.
daniel proposed to alice "after he got his shit together" but we don't know when this was. we do know daniel had a daughter by 1978 (7 years before car seats are mandatory) though we don't know how old she was—probably under 6 given he was imagining her in a car seat. we can probably assume alice is the mom, and based on her commenting on this part of his memoir that he never owned a buick, we can probably assume they were together around this time, or at least in contact. we also know he used black tar heroin in 1978.
this is only like semi-canon but on his linkedin page it says he started working as a freelance investigative journalist in 1982. it could be a random date but i imagine he's "got his shit together", working real jobs. so maybe it was around this time that he and alice got married. if we're assuming the devil's minion mind wipe theory is true, it would also be very fitting if the confusion of lost memories was what drew him specifically to investigative journalism as opposed to the portrait pieces he did before that. he doesn't know what the truth is anymore, so he starts looking for it wherever he goes.
and speaking of devil's minion, if daniel was cheating on alice with armand, then he's a lot like lestat indeed. but his secret lover is so secret he himself doesn't even know about him anymore. (or maybe alice did know there was someone, and felt very gaslighted when daniel suddenly started insisting it never happened after basically admitting it before? or maybe daniel's denials just suddenly got so convincing she agreed to marry him?)
two marriages, two children?
in 1985, daniel and alice were talking past each other when she told him she was pregnant. he was like remind me again later
louis and lestat didn't have another kid together, but lestat did make another vampire: antoinette. lestat had a child! while the marriage was going badly, a few years after getting (back) together. just like our boy danny.
after "breaking up" with lestat, louis will also have a "child", madeleine. he's giving claudia a "sister" while he's dating armand.
so here's a two-part prediction: 1. alice dumped daniel before their second child was born. 2. daniel met his second wife before his second child with was born.
so like lestat turning antoinette, daniel got alice pregnant BEFORE getting dumped like lestat (pun intended).
and like louis turning madeleine, daniel's second child was born AFTER he met his (soon-to-be) second spouse.
what if, like armand, the second wife didn't like daniel spending much time with his kids? it's been known to happen. we know absolutely nothing about this second marriage but i think we'll get something in season 2. is there something daniel shares with armand as the types of husbands they make? i bet there will be
daniel's childhood?
we know where daniel is now, and a little bit about how he got here. but the thing we know absolutely nothing about is where he started.
daniel was already struggling with drug abuse by the time he met louis and armand, doing what he "had to" to get high. we know it's not really the only reason he frequented gay bars, but still. he was at a point where he was willing to play the crack whore. so what led to it? addiction doesn't come from drug use alone, and genes aren't enough either. there's always something you're struggling to cope with that leads you to drug abuse. so what was it? his sexuality could be enough, but i bet there's more to it than that.
if we're looking for lestat parallels, rape trauma works. maybe his interest in claudia's assault was personal, his flippancy a defense mechanism? certainly a possibility. but childhood trauma seems like the safest bet, doesn't it? lestat certainly had it. but i don't wanna focus on him now.
i mentioned earlier that daniel and claudia share a passion for the truth and for writing. what if he had some of her childhood too? abusive parents, parents abusing drugs or alcohol, parents fighting a lot, parents cheating on each other. pick as many as you like. maybe he was even a band aid for a shitty marriage. maybe there was a difficult divorce. maybe one of his parents had an awful new partner and said they'd dump them but never did, or got back together every time. picked someone else over him over and over again. he certainly had a lot to say about that! maybe he gets so incensed over being lied to because his parents always lied to him too. maybe his outburst wasn't about louis at all. maybe memory is the monster. maybe his parents cursed him into the darkness. lestat's did, and he cursed his own children in turn. i bet that's what happened to daniel too: they fuck you up, your mom and dad; the poison drips through; we dance on the strings of those who came before us; memory is a monster. maybe daniel became his own father too. his father or his mother or both. it's usually both, right?
this is louis's story first and foremost but parts of it are claudia and lestat and armand's too, and daniel functions as a funhouse mirror for all of them!!!
whew
in adding the chapter headings i ended up moving things around so idk how coherent this is but i fear proofreading would only result in me editing this forever and i would really like to avoid locking even more posts into the drafts vault. 😭 hopefully it coheres? thank you for reading and please let me know your thoughts!
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clint mcelroy creating a dnd character: oh yeah, this bad boy can fit so much simple zest for life in him
#eliot posts#taz#the adventure zone#merle highchurch#zoox anthellae#ive not listened to graduation yet (and idk if i ever will) so idk if this applies to argo or not#i remember so little of amnesty and am only 10 eps into steeplechase so i can't speak for the non dnd campaigns either#it's funny how a lot of people's ttrpg characters often have common themes in them#me and my friend john from our irl dnd group were talking about that and it's like#alicia plays the most Friend Shaped girls imaginable. caleb's Cause Problems On Purpose. julia's are sassy and tend to do their own thing#john's are edgy in theory but extremely friend shaped and caring in practice. and i tend to play The Mom Friend.#not ALWAYS but pretty often. and basically always they're just really looking for human connection (whether they know/accept it or not)#even my goddamned PISS WIZARD is quickly careening towards mom friend territory??? somehow???#very few people tolerate him so he's protective of those who do. even if it's mostly just a coworkers situation in the party#and most of the party is So Fucking Stupid#it's a very hilarious party composition overall. just 5 guys all thinking ''wow. what a bunch of freaks. good thing i'm normal :)''#and the only one who is REMOTELY accurate in that assessment is the cleric whose catchphrase has quickly become#''hey. don't look at me. i just work with them.''
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guys wtf i just had the most detailed dream last night about a girlfriend that doesn’t exist,,, like idk how to explain it 😭😭😭 and i don’t even remember her name, it’s at the edge of my memory but i can’t recover it. but i remember like all the events and her face.
#this is the most stupidly worded post i’ve ever made#but it was so fucking sweet 😭😭😭 and somewhere along the line i realized i was dreaming and that i was going to lose her#and it was soul crushing#the most distinct part was when i dropped by her house like i usually did#and she was throwing a party and i squeezed through everyone to find her and then she kind of ignored me so i tried to make my way out again#but then her best friend stops me by the door and asks me if i wanna sing karaoke with them and i was like ???#and when i say oh okay. she says after all [name] threw this party for you#and this girl shows up in the doorway and asks me if i would do the honors of dating her#(and look this girl was way out of my league i assumed so)#(she was a really good artist and collected bunny plushies)#and i#SORRY THIS WHOLE THING IS SO STUPID BUT LIKE IT WAS A VERY POIGNANT DREAM#AND IT WAS VERY SWEET AND I MISS THIS GIRL THAT DOESNF FUCKING EXIST#BECAUSE OF A STUPID DREAM#nat’s rambles
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When a clown becomes king, the palace turns into a circus
#verkiezingen 2023#nederland#the netherlands#i cant believe the most islamophobic party won#people are so fucking stupid
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more nika headcannons please☹️
AAAA YES NIKA !!!!
─ warnings | okay so this is kinda short, pls lmk if yall want more!!!!!!
i don’t feel like nika’s thing is pda, like the most she will do is like a kiss on the cheek MAYBE
but girl trust as soon as you guys are alone she is ALL over you, like she can’t keep her hands off
and nika is like a generally aggressive player and seems very like stand offish
but with her girl SHE WILL LITERALLY BEFOME A WHOLE DIFFERENT PERSON
she’s so soft and like babyyyyyyy idk how else to explain it
she just wants to be taken care of 🥹 like she acts all tough and stuff but in reality she’s just a SOFTIE
and honestly you’re so whipped for her, but nika is like.. DOWN down bad
she’s usually very level-headed but when it comes to you, it is all thrown out the window
and this in ALL aspects — like if you ever need anything, at any time of day, nika will be there for you and do anything you need
also, she loses her shit when anyone hurts you even slightly
you think paige is insane when it comes to their person, you have NOT seen nika
it’s a totally different level of protective
maybe even over protective at times
when it comes to weirdo strangers at parties, yeah she’s cussing them out!!! and she isn’t afraid to put her hands on them too if they get too close!!!
like paige, she will get mad at anyone who hurts your feelings because who the fuck are they to hurt her precious girlfriend??!?!?
oh don’t even get me started if she sees tears, it’s over for them
doesn’t matter if you tell her not to get involved, she will defend you with her life
and it doesn’t matter who either, she’s so fiercely loyal!
speaking of loyalty, she literally only has eyes for you
even before you’d started dating, she’s loyal and will not even think about people
it takes her a while to catch feelings so that means it takes a LOT for her to lose feelings, therefore you’re stuck with her for life
but who would mind she’s the BEST
oh my gosh her accent makes you feral (it makes everyone go feral who can blame em?)
and she uses that to her advantage FOR SUREEEEE
she makes you wear her jerseys to games ALWAYS!
like if you show up to a game without her number on you, she’s gonna be pissed
idk why i get the vibe she’s lowkey petty too😭
she would pick stupid fights with you just so and you’ll get really annoyed with her sometimes because it’s like
babe… is it really that serious?
but it’s never too serious so you guys make up by the end of day
but if it is serious, nika WILL take it seriously and do everything in her power to either make it right or talk to you
because she knows communication is KEY!
#wcbb x reader#wcbb#uconn women’s basketball#uconn#uconn huskies#uconn wbb#nika muhl x reader#nika muhl imagine#nika mühl#nika muhl#ncaa women’s basketball#women's college basketball#wnba basketball#ncaaw
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Not to vaguepost about dutch politics but we really are in the trenches huh
#fuckass geert wilders winning the elections dutch ppl are so fucking stupid#was watching the news and hearing the entire list of things the pvv wants to achieve really made me realize how fucked we are#like i knew already of course but still#and i know most of it probably wont happen (i hope) bc of how our government works but having a far right wing party as the biggest party#really says so much about the state of this country rn#it sucks here man#shari speaks
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Hate hate hate hate fucking HATE contacting my reps basically saying shit like “I support Palestine, I want you to retract support from Israel, I support Palestine. I want you to stop what israel is doing in Gaza” over and over and them responding like “yes it’s so terrible we need a ceasefire but hamas is refusing to act civilized like our poor precious bby Israel” I hate America I hate America I hate it here hate hate hate hate hate
#I wish there was more I can do#I’m contacting reps and boycotting (not that I supported most companies that are being boycotted but have stopped the couple that I did)#and when I get paid Friday I’m planning on donating more#I’m trying to convince my annoying apathetic roommate that it’s not ‘pointless’ to do these things#as well as other ppl in my life#but when even doing these small things gets responses like this it’s so enraging#like I’m explicitly telling you I do not support what Israel is doing and they’re like ‘yes we know hamas bad’#FUCK YOU THATS NOT WHAT I SAID AND YOU DAMN WELL KNOW IT#UGH#I hate this stupid fucking country and they’re stupid fucking war crimes#and I wish there was more I could do#and I know this is useless saying all this and I don’t mean this in like a pity party way like ‘oohhh I’m not making a difference#and I feel bad :(‘ way#because what I feel regarding this is literally inconsequential#and I just need to continue doing what I can and uplifting Palestinian voices about everything#there’s just something so deeply insidious and disgusting about this country trying rephrase and put words in the mouths of ppl voicing that#they do NOT support this and want it to stop#which I know. I know is what the USA does. I know that’s what propoganda is#I’m just *muffled screaming*#anyways#fuck this country#kaz rambles
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No I will never not play a bard in BG3 I will not give up the chance to yell insults at my enemies mid-fight whilst playing a lil tune on my lute.
#i actually play the violin in-game#bards are either so fucking useless or the most important member of the party#all my team is genuinely fighting and im like “teehee im gonna play my violin and a cloud of dagger is gonna appear and kill you”#they hit astarion and my character is like “you stupid leftover piece of placenta#“you are like a summers day...sweaty”#plus i play low strength high charisma so bard is perfect#i just tell people to kill themselves and they do#i tell characters to fall in love with me and THEY DO#bg3#baldur's gate 3#baldurs gate iii#bard#dnd
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#let me vent here real quick#bachelorette/bachelor parties are one of the most stupid concepts we ever created#it's disgusting and humiliating to me#if I'd have a person who loves me enough that they decide that they want to spend the rest of their life with me it's like an ultimate win#i mean what more do you want to achieve in life? isn't that like a main goal?#I don't even mean marriage that's useless but just that safe warm loving feeling#and then you gather all your friends and you're going to look at it as game over?????#so anyway I should attempt a stupid bachelorette party this weekend and it's useless and incredibly expensive#and it's full of activities that are totally outside of my comfort zone like drinking and dancing and being half naked in a spa#and you have to wear some dumb accessories so that you also humiliate yourself in front of everyone#and first I thought will be able to handle it but yesterday I panicked and asked if I can be excused from all those activities#and people don't understand that my concept of fun is different from theirs#and i don't mean this in any negative way towards those people#it's just different for me and I'd love you to understand that#but... it's also not nice from me to ditch them last minute and let down my friend that's getting married#but yesterday I just had this moment when I thought fuck no I'm going to think about myself for once and it's just not right#because then you make people upset...#the actual wedding is another thing I dread...it will be an actual nightmare and there's no way I will ever escape it#so yeah I'm just full of emotions and I don't know what's the right thing to do and how to keep others happy and myself calm#at least last night I dreamt about Jake Bugg hugging me and if that's not the sign I'm going spend the rest of my life with that man...#i also decided to survive both of those events sober just to make it more challenging for myself#alcohol has way too many calories and i just want stay in control of my brain#i will see if the only three friends i have will resent me after this#i needed to sort my thoughts here even though I know ot doesn't look like so#i hope that you all are having a wonderful day and doing fantastic ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️
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