I’ll never understand how CC wrote Tessa, Jem and Will as the most perfect potential polyam love triangle and then wrote Cristina, Mark and Kieran as an absolute mess that clearly should’ve ended as just Mark/Cristina

ask game:

tsc (i’m sorry i always ask about them, my brainrot is strong and i love hearing your thoughts)

and community

don’t apologize pls lol I also am brain rotting hard and have few people to talk about it with so it’s appreciated :)

The Shadowhunter Chronicles

M/F OTP: there are others I really like or love in a more normal way, but Emma/Julian Will/Tessa and Jem/Tessa are the ones that hit on another level for me emotionally, I’m clinically insane about them. Also it’s a bit hilarious to think about, since this was formative media for me (I first read TID in late elementary/middle school and TDA as they were coming out in high school) how my taste in ships generally speaking was shaped… like if you look at pairings I gravitate towards in other fandoms since there are def patterns xd. The impact!

Other M/F ships I have love for (including this category because ik i don’t talk about them as much and in another fandom where I had less dynamics I’m super fond of to choose from I could have placed them in that first category think of them as like second tier Otp’s for me ): Mark/Cristina, James/Cordelia, Simon/Isabelle (last one also was formative they were thee hot girl/soft boy nerd ship to me in middle school. But it has been a while so unsure if they’d hit the same on reread, they are the tmi couple I would most like to see in the better in black collection though!)

M/M OTP: Jem/Will! And then follow up Kit/Ty Surefire ways to get me invested in a ship: they do necromancy together, meet cute with a knife to the throat, they break up without ever dating. Triple check.

F/F OTP: along those lines it’s Lucie x Grace literally the main reason I want to reread TLH (well I do also just want to see how it reads back to back and not broken up and I have other reasons but like. Those are less important) is to be able to properly write fic about them, like it genuinely pisses me off this fandom is so boring and tasteless I can’t believe I actually miss the legacies fandom they were annoying as hell but at least they understood that when women do dark magic together it’s polite to write detailed analysis of how gay they are 😭. The way I know cc has seen Buffy too like flop. Also it just fits archetypes of antagonistic femslash I tend to love in general see: Julia/Marina Aria/Alison Elena/Rebekah and more

OT3: Herongraystairs and then Kierarktina

Friendship OTP: Tessa & Magnus + Will & Magnus! And for familial relationships I adore all The Blackthorn siblings in TDA and their dynamics but especially Julian and Mark’s relationship is v compelling to me and I also love Cordelia and Alastair’s relationship v much it was my favorite overall development in TLH. And then for psuedo familial dynamics I Love Charlotte’s relationships with Tessa Jem Will and Jessamine. her relationship with Jem might be my softest spot overall especially because they have moments in CP2 that make me go 🥺 but as a documented Tessa lover I adore how having Charlotte as a mentor figure effects her arc. So those are my favorites Ik I failed at picking just one. Oh I also adore Emma and Cristina’s friendship although I also sometimes ship them romantically

Canon OTP: Blackstairs Wessa Jessa like I said

Crackship OTP: what even counts as crackship? I will admit that during my CP reread I did look up how many Will/Magnus fics there are on ao3 although I did not read them (there are 12 for inquiring minds).

Anti-OTP: The worst ship to me is Jordan/Maia but it’s been a long time so the vitriol has worn off and I don’t have another solid notp besides them but the other canon pairings I’m #unimpressed with are Clace Ghostwriter and Gracetopher … Lucie/Jesse probably irks me the most these days because I actually want to like them because the concept is so good but the execution falls flat for me and I really like Lucie and want someone more interesting for her (like Grace lol.)

Community

M/F OTP: ultimately when I’m actually watching the show it’s Jeff/Britta love their emmaxknightleycore vibes. But I did get really into Abed x Annie at one point and even wrote some fic about it over quarantine (when I first got into Comm) so I have a soft spot for that concept too

M/M OTP: Troy/Abed. They of course are The otp of the show.

F/F OTP: not really otp status but well I did write this Annie x Britta Carmilla Au: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27728689?view_adult=true

(I orphaned that account post quarantine)

OT3: Troy/Abed/Annie

Friendship OTP: I mean all the study group dynamics but I especially have soft spots for Annie and Troy + Abed and Britta moments

Canon OTP: Jeff/Britta

Crackship OTP: what even counts as crack …

Anti-OTP: I just don’t like Jeff/Annie I used to viscerally hate it these days I’m just like. It’s not for me lol.

you know what would be very interesting to see, in a world where mark didn't die and calzona decided to have another baby, how possessive mark would become of sofia. if he'd try to turn sofia against her mothers. how would calzona deal with that whole mess

okay so this is one of my favorite aus to mess around with bc lbr mark would not take it well.

like for ease, let’s say this is a no plane crash au. so s8 calzona who are very comfortable and domestic and everything and fairly untraumatized. and mark who’s still very much around and everything but things just never work with lexie and he has julia but most of his life is very much reliant on calzona (and sofia living across the hall)

now sofia turns 1 around the end of s8 and i personally think neither of calzona but especially arizona would want sofia to be an only child. and callie especially wouldn’t want there to be a huge gap between the kids bc she had that with her sister and they weren’t close. and given that they’d go an ivf route (based on s9), that can take time so i think end of s8 into s9 would be when they’d start talking about it and planning etc.

mark would take it so badly. even just the idea of calzona having a second baby would probably set him off. bc that’s going to change things. if they have another kid, they’ll be even more of a family without him. he’ll be left behind. mark would start complaining early, like as soon as he found out they were thinking about it which would probably be quickly bc callie tells him basically everything. it’d start with sort of sharp edged jokes about how they’re replacing him and sofia and why do they need another kid when they’ve already got such a perfect one.

and it’d just descend from there. mark trying to be involved again and how they’re all a family and he’s sofias dad. in a strange way, i think this would actually push callie to have some boundaries bc it’d be so glaring that he’s out of line. especially if (and it’s the most likely option at this stage) arizonas the one who’s pregnant. bc i honestly don’t think arizona would be as tolerant towards mark if she was pregnant. doubly so if mark tried to be involved at all.

the other important part to consider is the living situation. part of the reason s8 calzona and mark are able to coparent so well is that they live across the hall from each other and they can pass sofia back and forth easily and they can split everything pretty easily. but calzona are in a two bed, that’s not going to work with a baby. sort of two options - either they get a bigger apartment in their building or they get a house. sure the apartment is super close to the hospital, but neither of them really need to be rushing to the hospital to beat other people to surgeries like when callie and cristina moved in. and meredith lives in a nice residential neighborhood that’s only ten minutes away (plus good or bad, somehow everything in seattle is 15-20 minutes away). and arizona in particular i think would want a home for their family after she moved around so much.

once again, mark would not take this well. like he’d accuse of them of trying to take sofia away and pushing him out. because calzona moving out of the apartment building would probably make a more formalized, maintained schedule for sofia necessary and it could very well happen where calzona maybe have sofia more days a week bc it’s simply easier since there’s two of them.

now let’s fast forward a bit, sofia’s three, there’s a newborn, calzona are a perfectly happy family in a house with a yard. and mark’s a single dad in an apartment who’s probably never going to be with lexie.

regardless of calzona having another kid, i think mark would always try to “outdo” them and be the “fun dad” and let calzona be the more strict, structured parents. and while it might be cute when sofias a baby, it’ll become significantly less cute as sofia grows up. mark would spoil her and undercut calzona quite a bit and anytime calzona say no to something he’d say yes. and i think the odds are, it’d result in sofia being pretty spoiled and obnoxious in always running to mark whenever there are things she wants.

i also think mark would do the sort of underhanded comments about calzona, mainly aruzona, all the time. so sofia would always have that in her ear and marks more fun and he lets her do everything and he doesn’t have an annoying little sibling in his apartment. like there could totally be a situation where sofia says she wants to live with mark full time even as early as like idk age 10?

i think there is a possibility that calzona having a second kid could be the end of mark and callie and their weirdness. marks just too possessive and insecure about the idea of his family. and i think that also would be the point where arizona would put her foot down

jace + taking care of baby son alone for the first time please!!

Thank you, I love writing dad Jace

This is long but worth it

"well buddy it's just me and you, mommy took your sisters to the store," Jace said to his 6 month old son. And he smiled at Jace, that sweet innocent smile that babies and kids have, the smile of them not yet knowing the hardships of life, Jace and Clary swore they would give their kids the best life they could and they would make it easier for them.

And one of Jace's favorite thing about being a dad is his kids smile at him with the smile of knowing exactly who he is, He's dada

Jace read many books about pregnancy when Clary was pregnant with their first baby and he knew Clary would get super emotional but so did he.

He let his son grap his finger and swing it around like babies do, it's funny how at one point in your life all you want is constant fighting and being a hero and then after all that all you wanted was a family and once you have that family there really isn't anything more important.

Clary and the kids were Jace's world now and they are a world he would protect and love until dies.

"you know I love you right bud," Jace said. Stephen squealed and blew raspberries at Jace "I'll take that as a yes," Jace said with the loving and gentle smile he had for the ones he loved, he kissed his son on the cheek

Jace stuck his tongue out at him, and Stephen giggled, Jace started laughing as well, this is why being a parent made him feel so fulfilled, those laughs your kids gave you when you were being silly

The way they trusted you and loved you without a second thought and in return you give them love and take care of them and make sure they know their trust is safe with you, Jace wouldn't be anything less to his kids, he would always make sure they knew he loved and supported them no matter what, and that they can always trust him.

"listen chickpea, you need to stop being so cute and getting bigger, I want to snuggle you forever," Jace told his son while tearing up cause Stephen was already six months and he doesn't know how it's already been six months since he came into the world and they added another precious light to their life.

When Jace and Clary found out they were having another kid they were both overjoyed, Jace got Clary to agree to a big family, after they had their first kid and Celine started getting bigger, Clary came to Jace with tears saying 'she's getting so big it's not fair' at first Jace thought Clary was hurting and his instincts were to take her into his arms but then he found why and he started crying 'i know it seems like yesterday she was a newborn'

And then they met Eleanora who's parents had been killed on a mission and they took her in, Jace and Clary made sure she knew that she was just as much their daughter as Celine was, Jace having an adopted family himself didn't hesitate taking her in, and then a year later Clary found out she was pregnant with their son

And now Jace was here married with the most amazing and beautiful wife he could ever ask for, who is also the best mom ever in his opinion, and with 3 amazing kids who he will give all the love he can to, he had to admit he was nervous, he knew how to be a dad to girls but not a son yet, sure Max and Rafe are boys but that's different, their his nephews, Jace now had a son and he knew he will teach him to be a good man, he will teach his children to be better then he has been and make sure that they know how proud he is of them no matter what.

Jace decided to take Stephen to the greenhouse, "see chickpea, all these plants are beautiful, they all have a purpose and they all are different," Jace was telling his son as he bent down by a Basil plant "see this you use to cook with to give good flavor, one day dada will make you something with it," Jace said beamingly.

"one day I will teach you how to do all kinds of things, but for now you need to stay little," Jace said as he tickled his son, and was given that adorable baby laugh in return.

"you know, you really are precious, and I swear I will be the best dada I can be to you and your sisters, mommy will too, she's great you know, she also loves to the moon and would do anything for you, and she is the strongest person I know," Jace told his son

"oh, and then there's your uncle Alec, he is amazing and he's making the world a better place for the babies like you, he is the truest person I know and he loves you very much, Alec is a very important person to me and he doesn't get enough recognition, but I know you will look up to him just like I do," he said with a fond smile "also if anyone ever hurts you, your aunt Izzy will fight them, she loves you so much as well and she is one of the most amazing women you will ever meet, tho I suppose I am biased, but most of all Izzy will protect you no matter what," Jace said as sat down with his son in his arms and looked him in the eyes, they were Clary's green eyes.

"and your uncle Magnus will teach you how to put eyeliner on some day, and I want you to know that no one else can show you how to do it better, he'll also give you glitter and you will probably make a mess but you'll have a lot of fun doing that, you get that from me, I like to cause trouble," he said teasingly "and your uncle Simon will get you into all kinds of Mundane movies and comic books and I have no idea what they are about, but I'll listen when you come to tell me about them," he said with a smile

"and then there's grandma Maryse, she is another amazing woman, your surrounded by amazing women, she'll sing to you and play with you and spoil you, she'll read to you and make sure you feel safe, she is my mom and she tried her best to make me feel safe, so I know she will for you too," he said as he was starting to tear up.

"and now we talk about Max and Rafe, your cousins, Max is gonna get you into trouble and Rafe will get you both out of it, and you all will have many stories to tell and you'll be close and always have each other's backs, and they love you so much as well."

"and there's Tessa and Jem they are beautiful people who are so kind and loving you wonder if they are real, you know if you ever need them they'll come with hesitation, and they love you, then we have Kit and Mina, Kit will always make sure you have cookies and Mina will play with you and give you bandages if you need one," he said and saw that Stephen was staring at him like he was listening "and there's aunt Emma, she's gonna spoil you along with your sisters, she calls you and your sisters super angel babies, and she will smoother you in kisses so you better watch out, but she is kind and badass and you'll love her."

"and aunt Lily will say she'll eat you cause your so cute but she won't really I promise, aunt Lily is another amazing woman, and she is a savage, trust me she'll teach you things, and there's aunt Maia, I was not so nice to her when we first met but I grew on her and I apologised, and she loves you, she says she doesn't know how I made such cute babies, but i have to admit your mama had a big part in that," he said with a laugh.

"oh and there's Aline and Helen, they'll love you as well, Aline is another badass and amazing woman and Helen is fierce and kind, Aline will also show you how to throw a good lunch but don't tell mama I told you that, and Helen will make your oatmeal with love," Jace said with fondness.

"and there's Mark and Cristina, they are in charge of the Downworlder-Shadowhunter alliance,and Mark will make you weird sandwiches but he makes them with love, and he'll give you strawberries, and Cristina will sing you to sleep with spanish lullabies, your surrounded by so many people who love you, and you'll grow up to know these amazing people," he said emotionally.

"ah, there's my boys," Clary said as she walked up to them. "What's dada telling you chickpea?" She said as she picked their son up and kissed his temple

"I was telling him he is surrounded by good people who will love him," he said

"yes, so many, sometimes I wonder if you'll even know what to do with it all," Clary said with a grateful and loving smile.

"dada! dada!," Called Cece and Nora, Jace saw them running up to him and they tackle hugged him.

"hey my girls," he said as he took them both in his arms and they told him about their visit to the store and Clary took Stephen to go feed him, cause he was now hungry.

Fatherhood was an adventure and it's a adventure he hoped to be on forever, "alright girls let's go get dinner ready while mama takes care of baby chickpea," he said to them.

And they went and made dinner and Jace would never know what he did to deserve this love he now had but he knew he would forever be grateful and make sure he gives as much love back.

Tagging @khaleesiofalicante cause I know you'll be emotions with me

This got long but I couldn't help myself and I wanted to write about them as a family nas wellz hopefully you enjoy anon and hopefully this isn't too bad 🧡💛🧡💛

Ha

Ha ha GREYS UPDATE

Okay I'm like in the middle of season seven

Alex's family is a fucking disaster its so sad, I hope they go into more detail about it.

I miss izzie

Meredith and Derek are trying to have a baby!!! I hope they do cuz it would be so cute omg.

Especially after her misscarage it would be a rainbow baby

Arizona and callie... A lot to say

They were going to Africa and I was like.. Yayy

Then they broke up, that really made me sad cuz there one ofy favorite couples (along w merder)

Then arizona flew back but callie had s*x with Mark!!!

NOW

she's pregnant and having his baby and i think callie and arizona are back together.

Im so excited but Idk if arizona is gonna stay... Idk bad feeling

Oh also lexie got mad and left

April nearly slept with Alex (baaad idea) then avery kicked the shit out of him (good idea)

I love Alex but what he did to April was harsh

Cristina is back at work, she quit and took time off became bffs with Derek. Went fishing, had a life crisis then went back into the OR like nothing happened.

Glad she's back I missed her.

Still iffy about owen and Cristina together... It's odd. Idk if there gonna last.

Teddy god married!!! Go a guy she just met!!! Why???? But also like... Yayy shes saving his life...

But I super scared cuz I'm still (STILL) emotionally damaged by denny, I miss him so much

Bailey is dating eli and I think there cute but I miss that other guy she was seeing for a bit. He was nice

Oke byebye for now <333

TDA characters as types of tiktokers

y’all KNOW i’m bored when i’m doing this shit lmao 

i’ll get around to doing the other TSC characters eventually TDA was just the first to come to mind also if you’re not actively on tiktok some of what i say might not make sense ahaha

also i named some tiktokers who yall can use for reference for some of them and from what i’ve seen they’re all fairly unproblematic so you should check them out!!

EMMA CARSTAIRS

okay so she’s DEFINITELY super popular and she uses her platform for good

she’s really funny and a lot of her audios go viral posts videos of her dancing saying that she cant dance but she’s actually really good at it

6M followers and growing fast 

 hypes up her boyfriend’s account ALL the time

calls out misogynistic/racist tiktokers through duets and KEEPS THEIR TAG IN THE CAPTION  

 she is not afraid of starting drama lmao

occasionally hops on POV and transition trends but its usually satire 

emma can’t act for shit lmao 

super active on tiktok and has a spam account

people are always asking her to drop the skin care routine but she doesn’t have one?? 

*pushes Zara down* “and no one’s gonna help her?? WOW some world we live in”

JULIAN BLACKTHORN

there’s no way he doesnt  have an art account lmao

a lot of his paintings go viral but 90% of his comments are 14 year old girls thirsting over him

yall know that pottery guy on tiktok?? the cute one?? (i searched up his account just for this post he’s @/daxnewman769) that’s the best way to describe him

literally all the famous tiktokers commission him

probably has like 4M followers lmao

will occasionally make about how respecting women doesn’t make you a “simp”

doesn’t get into tiktok drama tho

posts candid videos of emma and all his jealous 14 year old fans get so pressed but he shuts down anyone who says anything bad about her

sometimes does painting or drawing tutorials and he’s really good at teaching stuff lmao

CRISTINA ROSALES

omg okay so like yall know those really pretty girls on tiktok who are literal models and are always dropping tips on how to frame your face for pictures and best clothes and poses and whatever  ( @/ameliezilber is the first person that came to mind as an example)

thats her

alot of her content is just for the aesthetic

BLING EFFECT

GRWM’s all the time

10 step skin care routine 

GOOD VIBES

has a pretty decent following?? like at least 2 million

has a spam but it’s exactly the same as her main lol

also calls out problematic tiktokers but not by name

her entire account is full of body positivity and does a bunch of stuff on loving yourself

sometimes does POVs and all the comments are like “@ netflix hire her rn”

sometimes posts crack videos with emma and cute vids with mark and kieran

MARK BLACKTHORN

does a lot of reaction videos and duets

a lot of his videos go viral but he doesn’t have a huge following like maybe 800k

 everyone still knows him

gets at least twenty “are you wearing only one contact” comment about his eyes every post

he’s really funny without even realizing it 

sometimes goes inactive for weeks at a time and just forgets that tiktok exists lmao

shows off kieran and cristina ALL THE MF TIME AND EVERYONE IS SO JEALOUS LIKE HOW ARE ALL OF THEM HOT

KIERAN 

doesnt have a tiktok lmao sorry

but shows up so much on mark’s and cristina’s that a lot of people know who he is

DIANA WRAYBURN

unironically does POVs but is actually good at them??

lots of videos talking about the struggles of minorities like LGBTQ+ and POC and women

posts a lot of those vidoes that are like “what to do if you ever get kidnapped” “red flags in relationships” “most powerful parts of the body” etc

probably has like 500k followers 

at the end of the day she doesn’t really use tiktok that much tho ahaha

LIVVY BLACKTHORN:

does a little bit of everything??

posts dance videos sometimes 

omg her transitions are SO good

everyone is in love with her and she has to remind them that she’s a minor (i’m just a kid plays aggressively in the background)

posts videos that are just vibes?? like her skating at night, dancing in traffic with dru/her friends, walking through the city at night etc

lots of lip syncing videos to whatever sounds are popular and all her comments are like “i wish i looked like this” “guess im not eating today” and she gets so upset :((

she wants everyone to know that they’re perfect the way they are!!

also posts POVs sometimes and she’s not that bad at them ahaha 

probably has like 1 million followers 

doesn’t even need a spam just posts everything on her main 

shouts out her sibilings accounts all the time

overall just great energy

TY BLACKTHORN

never posts his face on his main but he does on his spam

yall know those accounts that post fun facts or psychology facts?? his is like that except he talks to explain them and everyone finds his voice SO calming 

he posts a lot of content of animals and everyone is in AWE with how good he is with them

his username is probably theanimalwhisperer or something djkfskjd

every single time he posts Kit on his account all the comments are like “OOH ICU” and “SHIP” and “ASK HIM OUT ALREADY”

he gives 0 shits about popularity on tiktok he’s just posting for fun because he likes teaching people about his interests

so he has like maybe 500k followers

lots of philosophical questions that has everyone questioning their existence

ugh i love him

KIT HERONDALE

be honest this is what y’all were waiting for 

yall know those unproblematic ppl that everyone refers to as the “king(s) of tiktok”???

yeah thats him

SO FUNNY

LIKE HIS CONTENT IS GENUINELY HILARIOUS

lots of sarcasm and satire

think @/adamkindacool  ?? (one of my favourite tiktokers lmao)

does reaction videos for those “pov: im the annoying hot cheeto girl sitting next to you in math class” videos

dark humor (not like rude humor but actual dark humor)

like “i put the baby in the oven and the pizza in the bed” type of jokes back when those were a thing

has like 4M followers but almost every single one of his posts go viral so he’s gaining fast

lots of pranks

starts a bunch of trends

any video he posts of Mina goes viral

sometimes he posts some really weird stuff that has everyone laughing so hard irl (@/benoftheweek)

he NEVER thirst traps but still gets a lot of those weird sexual fairy comments on his posts (iykyk)

TO BE CLEAR I MEAN THE FAIRY EMOJI ONES NOTHING TO DO WITH HIM BEING FAE 

reacts to the comments with a video of him just staring at the screen with the “oh to see without my eyes” or “im just sixteen” audio going on in the background which only encourages them to make more weird comments

anyways everyone loves him

any of his povs are pure jokes meant to make fun of pov’ers

posts maybe one serious tiktok every 5 months that talks about being respectful and using your platform for good

“i miss old tiktok”

posts a lot of random videos of Ty where, again, all the comments are shipping them except even more so on his account because everyone can see his heart eyes for Ty

collabs with Dru a lot and does a bunch of duets of her videos

everyone loves him bye

DRU BLACKTHORN

SO many memes

she deletes any hate in her comments bc she honestly doesnt care to respond to them and doesn’t need that kind of negativity in her life

but one time she got a “the f in women stands for funny” comment and she WENT OFF

does really dark povs sometimes that are really interesting

CLOWN MAKEUP + SCARY CLOWN TIKTOKS ( think @/avani ‘s clown make up posts

REALLY good at makeup and sometimes gets julian to do scary makeup on her for tiktoks and povs (like those ones with stitches over the mouth or skin peeling off)

huge ally!! posts a lot about minorities struggles and white privilege, and acknowledges hers

does movie reviews and stuff sometimes

“types of” videos

pulls a lot of pranks on her sibilings with livvy and sometimes with Kit

lots of body positivity + self love

calls out back-handed compliments

also has a lot of content like Livvy’s of just vibing in LA

julian and emma and mark go off at anyone who sexualize her in the comments

probably has like 650k followers

posts a couple of times a week

BONUS: 

JAIME ROSALES

lots of skateboarding videos idk he just gives me that vibe

doesn’t post that often but is super popular

like maybe 1.5M followers

really passionate about systematic racism

HATES all those privileged white boys using the “this is america” audio to pretend they’re oppressed ( this is a may 2020 thing so it probably wont make sense to anyone who sees this after lmao)

POSTS A LOT OF THIRST TRAPS LMAO 

also posts lots of videos that’s just him yelling about stuff but they’re really entertaining to watch ( like that guy sebastian @/sauceyogranny)

everyone thinks he’s super hot he always shows up in those “hottest boys on tiktok” videos except sometimes he’s just the token POC boy and it makes him mad :( 

DIEGO ROSALES

HIS ACCOUNT IS SO PRACTICAL LMAO

lots of tips 

“what to do if you’re trapped in the desert” “what to do if you’re kidnapped and stuck in the trunk”

doesnt reply to comments EVER unless it’s to clarify a point he made in the video or answer a question

has like 200k

okay thats it lmao im done bye this took me like an hour to make

i’ll get to all the other characters from the other series’ eventually 

also if yall are wondering abt the lack of f*ckbois in this post they’re coming dw

TMI CHARACTERS AS TYPES OF TIKTOKERS

TID CHARACTERS AS TYPES OF TIKTOKERS 

TLH CHARACTERS AS TYPES OF TIKTOKERS

Grey's Anatomy: Breathe (17x10)

Well, this was stressful.

Cons:

Okay, I loved seeing Lexie and Mark in theory, but I have to be brutally honest and say that this is the first time that Meredith's dreamscape beach scenes tipped over into too saccharine for me. I think it's because Lexie and Mark both seemed like guardian angels, only there for Meredith, and they didn't really make me remember the fully developed characters. It wasn't bad by any stretch of the imagination, but it wasn't my favorite of the cameos.

When Catherine asked Jo if she was thinking about switching specialties and Jo had this weird reaction, that felt like an awkward script moment to me. Too over the top and noticeable of a reaction to such an innocuous question.

Pros:

Hey, Owen had three separate moments in this episode that I liked. What even is this crazy upside-down world?! First, the texting with Cristina was hilarious and cute. I love the little ways they think of to bring the characters into the story even though the actors are unavailable. It made me think about Alex, though... does he know Meredith is on a vent? Does he fucking care? Ugh. Still bitter.

The second Owen moment I liked was when he told Tom that he wouldn't wish survivor's guilt on anyone. That was a nice moment between the two of them. Tom is not always the kindest but he's cruelest when he's aiming the insults at himself. I liked that Owen recognized that unhealthiness in him and decided to say something about it.

And then finally, Owen coming over to pick up Leo and Allison, and telling Zola that her mom came off the vent. That was such a lovely moment. It felt so earned, like such a big triumph, and it warmed my heart that he told Zola, instead of telling Amelia and Teddy first.

Speaking of... Meredith is off the vent! Let's have a dance party! That was super cute. I loved Richard hitting this low moment of grief and then with the innovation about sharing the vents, he skyrocketed into a place of such hope. This whole episode toed that line really well. Lots of tragedy, lots of near-deaths and catastrophic happenstances... but then a lot of hope mixed in!

Schmitt had to deal with a friend of the family coming in with bad COVID symptoms, and then the woman's daughter is also admitted, also very sick. It comes down to one vent, two patients who desperately need it. Very dramatic stakes, and my heart was breaking for the mother-daughter duo of interns who had to be there for this very fraught situation. Also, poor Schmitt, intubating the patient and then that moment of realization that there were no more ventilators available... so terrible.

But then you have Maggie, coming in with the save of the day, as she realizes they can split the airflow and use one vent for two patients! This is probably... not actually viable, or else it's something that already would have been tried in real life, right? Or maybe this is going on all over the place in hospitals and I just don't know about it. But in any case, in this fictional world, I loved this win for Maggie. It's not total victory - it's still really bad that these patience have to be ventilated. But it gives them a reprieve, exactly when it was so badly needed.

And then... Winston proposed! Maggie said yes!! I'm so happy for her. This is a relationship I really understand for her. It's what she deserves. I'm curious as to how Winston is going to fit in with the ensemble cast as a whole: will he become a series regular? I hope so, because I like Maggie and I like this loving relationship for her.

We're getting some more time with Hayes. We meet his sister-in-law, a woman with MS who doesn't much trust western medicine. Catherine performs a routine surgery on her, but there's a complication (because of course there is!). We see how badly shaken Hayes is, at the prospect of losing someone else, especially since this woman has become such an important part of his children's lives, in the wake of their mother's death. Luckily, it looks like she's going to be okay - another moment where hope wins!

I just really liked the vibe between Hayes and his sister-in-law. They had this deep familiarity and affection, even with clear differences of opinion about important things. And seeing Hayes break down a bit, and Jo be the one to bolster him, was a nice little dynamic moment between the two of them, so I liked that as well.

A couple other moments I liked: Jackson and Jo in bed, and Jo saying "your mother is scary" and Jackson saying "why would you bring up my mom when I'm lying here naked, what is wrong with you?" That was super funny.

Also, despite the cheese, I did like watching Lexie and Mark frolic in the waves, and the anecdote about Mark yelling in Callie and Arizona's ears to try and warn them about future hardship.

And finally, despite my continued antipathy about Teddy, I did like that moment where Owen gave her the credit for Meredith coming off the vent, showing that he's letting go of some of his anger. I might not ever be a fan of Owen or Teddy as characters, but I'm definitely on board with closing the chapter on their drama for a while. They're exhausting to deal with.

So that's that! As the episode ends, it looks like Meredith might be ready to wake up at long last. Is there anyone else she'll get to see on the beach before she does? One final glimpse of Derek? We'll have to wait and see!

8/10

Kierarktina children headcannons

The headcannons @sweet-chesus have been working on and that people have been asking for. I hope you all enjoy!! It's based around the Kierarktina children we've already created, and it's about their first date and their partner meeting the family.

Daisy:

Whilst being in her father's court, Daisy notices a fae girl who takes her fancy. After a lot of flirting, Daisy asked the girl, whose name is Anabla out on a date. Both of them are 17 at the time.

Their first date is a picnic is Unseelie. They have an assortment of Faerie food and just spend ages talking. They do manage to get a few kisses in before heading their separate ways.

Eventually Daisy is convinced by her family to invite her girlfriend round. Daisy is a little taken aback by "I'm having dinner with my girlfriend's father who also happens to be the Unseelie King" but thankfully Kieran decides he likes her and approves of the fact she's dating his daughter.

Cristina decides to get the baby photos out saying "if you think Daisy is cute now, wait till you see her as a baby". Both Cristina and Anabla are living their best lives in that moment but Daisy is blushing like a tomato behind her hands just going "please stop"

About a year later when the girls are 18 they have a discussion about a friend of theirs, a male far called Kell. He gets on really well with both girls and as they are both Poly they decide to ask him if he'd like to be an addition to their relationship, something he's happy to do.

Kierans is hosting a ball (he doesn't think much of revels but knows he can't have nothing so settled for balls) and they decide it would be a good time to go as a poly relationship.

Kieran, Cristina and Mark, along with Jordan are at the ball. Amelia and Alfie are deemed too young so are with Marks aunt Nene (After she was banished from Seelie, Kieran welcomed her into his court and she's one of the few trusted with his children).

Daisy introduces Kell to her family and Kieran does the whole thing in which he makes it very clear to Kell what will happen if he hurts his baby girl. He also takes Daisy aside and does the whole "he's older than you and immortal so be careful" talk but knows he makes Daisy happy. Daisy knows he said what he did as he has her back.

She takes Kell to meet her youngest brother and sister and they immediately love him. He gets involved with some game they are playing by giving Alfie a piggy back and chasing Amelia.

Jordan

He meets his girlfriend Quinn at the institute whilst training and they become really close friends. She's the first person he comes out to as panromantic asexual as she's so understanding of him

When he asks her out, one of the first things she does is discuss his boundaries with regards to intimacy and his asexuality as she doesn't want to do something he doesn't feel comfortable with. He's ok with hugs, hand holding and kissing but that's it. They agree if he starts tracing the voyance rune on his hand it means that things have gotten too much and he needs a minute.

Both of them are 15 at the time but are really mature for their age.

Their first date is too and ice cream parlor. They just sit and eat and make each other laugh. Quinn gets a bit of ice cream on her lip, and Jordan points it out, offering to remove it for her, which she agrees to. He leans forward and then gives her a questioning look and she nods, and he kisses her really softly before leaning back and saying the ice cream was gone

As Quinn and Jordan where already friends before hand, when he brings her home and is like "we are dating now" and the family is super chill about it.

Amelia

Amelia goes to a Nephilim swimming club along with a guy called Jack. She spends ages crushing on him and going home and babbling about him to Daisy and Cristina.

She's 16 by the time she decides to ask him out on a date. But just before she asks him, he asks her and of course she agrees.

They agree to go to a spa as it's really chill and relaxing and their isn't any pressure to talk all the time. He tells her about his younger sisters who are twins and called Lexie and Dakota and she tells him about her family.

When she brings him home to meet the family, the first thing Daisy says is "so you're the famous Jack are you?" To which Jack nods and responds with "so you're the famous Daisy I take it?" And from then on they get on really well.

Like with Daisy's partners, Kierans skeptical of the guy his little girl is dating but soon decided he likes him .

Everyone thought Daisy, Anabla and Kell were all over each other but Amelia and Jack put them to shame and are literally all over each other. They others platonically joke about it every so often but Alfie, aged 11 just moans. Daisy and Jordan often distract him or Mark offers to take him to visit his cousins. But th couple can keep their hands off each other when they need to.

Alfie

Like his older brother, Alfie met his girlfriend whilst training at the institute. She suspected his sexuality and respected it so when she developed feelings for him she kept quiet.

Eventually he comes out to her and she says she's so proud of him for doing so. They are 16 when he asks her out and of course she agrees.

They have a meal and then go for a walk. They find a private spot and sit on the blanket Alfie brought with him, enjoying the view wand talking.

When they have their first kiss, they pour as much emotion into it as that can. Bethany guides Alfie's hands as he doesn't know what to do with them, one going to her waist and the other cupping her face. She ends up with her fingers in his hair. When they break for air they rest forheads and grin at how happy they are. Alfie of course asks if the kiss was ok and as soon as she confirmed it was they are kissing again.

The family are super accepting of Bethany. They know how hard Alfie finds opening up to people outside the family so when she comes round for a family gathering they make their gratitude known and make her feel super welcome

Hi! Sorry if this comes across as completely random but I was deep in your writing tag and I saw the Always Faerie AU. I just had to say that I’m incredibly intrigued by it and I was wondering if you had any more headcanons about it that you could share? Or if you aren’t planning on writing it in the future, could you summarize what you had intended to happen in it? Thanks! Love your content!

I already put down some headcanons here, so if you haven’t read those, that’s a good starting place. I actually do have a pretty good sense of where the plot would go, in a broad sense. But rather than give you all bullet points, I’ll try a short fic to start it out and then summarize the general plot from there.

There was no question about it. Helen was gone, and Mark knew three things.

One: He could not tell his mother. She wouldn’t survive another dose of heartbreak.

Two: The Seelie would not help him find her. She was a bother to them, just as much as he was. The Seelie Queen was interested in them, but that interest manifested as little more than occasional indulgence or demand. Nene loved them, in her own way, but she was sworn to the court with faerie vows. She would not disobey.

Three: The world was not kind to people like them. Every moment that passed decreased the chances he’d find Helen alive. The Circle could have her, or the Unseelie, or Lilith herself for all he knew.

Action was needed. Quickly.

“She might be somewhere we haven’t checked yet,” Cristina suggested, as if they hadn’t searched every nook and cranny of the Seelie’s underground abode, and even most of the forest above. “Or maybe she got lost.”

Miach shook his head. “No. No. If she went out she would have left a note- she always leaves a note.”

“Then mayhaps the note was lost,” Kieran said, trying to be soothing and failing. He looked almost as spooked as Mark.

A dull dread filled the pit of Miach’s stomach. “I want to check her room again,” he whispered.

Helen’s room was next to his, two little alcoves off their mother’s sick room that had served them since they were children. But as the lady Nerissa had grown sicker and sicker, Helen had taken over more and more of her old spaces. Her library, her sitting room, both were Helen’s now. Mark had been left only a pantry of herbs, but hadn’t minded much. He’d always preferred exploring to sitting home, stewing in grief.

The box was in the library, hidden behind two scrolls in ancient greek. It took them an hour of searching to find it, another hour his sister could be in peril. By the time Kieran came down with the flat, abalone box, Mark felt bloodless.

“Do you want me to open it?” Cristina asked, because Cristina was kind in a way only people raised out of the courts could be.

“No,” Miach said. Heart aching, he opened the box.

Inside were letters, dozens of them, some on crisp white paper and some on fancy stationary with blue flowers printed on them. All of them looked terribly human, right down to the bubbly handwriting.

Mark felt himself relax. She’d run away with a human then. That was almost safe, almost normal. He could find her, he could bring her home.

(How she’d met her beau was a mystery of its own- neither of Nerissa’s children had ever been allowed outside of Faerie, but there would be time to interrogate her on that later.)

Kieran gasped. “The name,” he whispered, “Miach, read the name.”

At the bottom, in the same girlish handwriting it said:

…It seems now that the world has turned to gold. Even so, all it reminds me of is your hair and your lips

Unfailingly Yours,

Aline

Aline. He had heard that name before.

Kieran hastened to explain. “There was a delegation of Shadowhunters, a year ago.” Long before they had known each other. “They came to the Unseelie Court and said they were visiting the Seelie Queen as well. There was a girl with them by the name of Aline. Aline Penhallow.”Mark’s heart stopped.

He remembered the shadowhunters as well. There had been about five of them, all dressed in black. Nene had tried to keep Alessa and Miach as far away from them as possible but the Seelie Queen had called Helen to court in spite of her protests. Mark, still a child by faerie standards, had remained locked in his room.

Helen had come home looking a bit flushed and harried, but she’d insisted it had all been fine, that the Shadowhunters hadn’t wanted anything to do with her and Mark.

He’d always known his sister could lie, but she’d never lied to him before.

How long had she and this Shadowhunter girl been communicating? How had they planned to stay in touch? How many months had Aline Penhallow planned to lure his sweet, gentle sister into a trap?

Cristina was the one who spoke first. Lightly, she placed a hand on Miach’s shoulder and said, “We should go, now. If we’re going to rescue Helen we’ll need to leave at night, which means we should have been packing ages ago.”

It took a moment for him to realize what she meant, and almost instantly his mind turned to suspicion. “You can’t leave. You’re sworn to the Seelie Queen.”

“Family is more important than oaths,” Cristina declared. “And this is family. Besides, I’m probably human, I’m not expected to behave like a civilized faerie.” That was true, there was more leeway for those with naturally twisted minds, who couldn’t be held to their promises like proper beings. Young changelings and half-faeries were considered to be charity cases, and there was no one to blame but nature if they broke a few promises. At worst she’d get beaten.

It was still a lot to ask of anyone. Miach tried to smile, so she’d know he appreciated it.

“Kieran,” she said, turning to their lover, who seemed trapped in his own private hell. “Can you cover for us here?”

Slowly, the prince turned to look at them. Then, thoughtfully, he said, “No. I can’t. I’m coming with you.”

Kieran would get worse than beaten if he tried to escape. Hostages weren’t something either court took lightly. Miach grabbed his hands. “You don’t mean that.”

“I do. I’m tired of being a pawn. I can leave the court with the two of you, the magic binding me allows it, and they won’t be able to modify that at a distance. There are no oaths restricting me. One might even argue that I’m obligated to try to escape.”

One might, Mark thought, but few would. It wasn’t a plea that would hold up well in any trial.

Escaping with a prince put them all in more danger. On the other hand, Kieran was more powerful and more skilled at combat than either of them, and if they wanted to rescue Helen they’d need someone who could actually wield a sword.

He turned to Cristina. “It’s your call.” She was the second most likely to suffer the consequences, if they were caught.

Cristina added her hands to theirs, making more of a determined mound than a desperate hold. “We’re better together,” she said.

Neither of them were prepared to argue with her.

Most of the story I have sketched out involves trying to find Helen (and later Aline, since they both got kidnapped together and the Penhallows made them promise to rescue them both). But since the Circle is pretty good at shielding, they have to use some very roundabout methods to try to track them down- first they talk to Aline’s family, then Cristina’s family, then moving onto Kieran’s, then the entire Downworld, and so on. 

It’s evolves into sort of a globe trotting semi-heist as they search for ingredients to make the elusive perfect tracking spell that Mark has only heard written about. 

Also they have to stay one step ahead of the Seelie knights looking for them. 

And it’s a race against time cause who knows what the Circle is planning to do with Helen and Aline. (Spoiler: Helen actually has a pretty good handle on it and is leveraging some of her magical knowledge for protection.)

Jia Penhallow recognizes Cristina but doesn’t tell her. She does tell the Rosales family who are now searching for this faerie raised girl they thought they lost years ago. 

Cristina’s faerie family panics when they hear she met Shadowhunters and try to smother Mark in rose petals. 

Kieran’s family is proud of him for the first time in his life (Made off with two Seelie courtiers! Atta boy!) but does try to keep them, to gain the upper hand on the Seelie Court. They end up having to fight their way out. 

When they barter their way into the siege situation Spiral Labyrinth, Malcolm Fade hears the name Blackthorn and has a panic attack and then Catarina Loss makes everyone hot chocolate. 

They have a cute dinner on the Strip while trying to figure out their way into the Shadowworld Market. Then Johnny Rook reveals that Mark’s dad is alive and throws even more drama on the family fire. 

Their last stop is the Wild Hunt, because they need an ingredient from Gwyn ap Nudd himself. It’s terrifying and also a learning experience for everyone. 

Finally they’re ready to break into Valentine’s HQ, but in the course of traipsing around two worlds to figure out where it is they realized how woefully unprepared they are to fight the Circle. So they last minute find some allies in the families they’ve lost. Andrew Blackthorn just found out he had a daughter an hour ago and he’s ready to call in some favors for her. 

Climactic battle. Secrets revealed. Helen and Aline refuse to be parted. So on and so forth. Very standard, heroic story. But during all the camping out in the woods of faerie and finding a hotel room in LA, Mark, Cristina, Kieran are still struggling with their relationship, which started out as a way to pass the time and make friends but is now something much more. 

They were all raised by faeries and they’re very good at passion and pretty words, but not super great at navigating complicated emotional pasts, or talking about feelings honestly. 

In the end, can they stay together? Will they stay together?

(Of course, duh. I think they end up with the Rosales long term, though Kieran might go to the Wild Hunt and just be a very long distance boyfriend.)

perfect harmony (jackson avery) 5. moment of truth pt. 1

*two months later*

Penelope

My alarm blares it's annoying racket, disturbing me from my peaceful slumber. I was in the middle of a very good dream which involved a naked Jackson and a bottle of Vintage Port. Nevertheless I get up anyway, because today the fifth year residents head to San Francisco to take our boards. Our flight is in five hours, leaving us just about an hour to be dressed and ready and at the hospital to get on the bus. The bus ride is only about a half hour, but April will probably have our heads if we're late. She's a total control freak.

I make my way out of my comfy warm bed and go into the bathroom, turning on the shower and stepping inside. I'm just about done shaving my legs when I hear a door open and close. I'm pretty sure Mer and I agreed to leave together so if that hoe left without me, she is gonna hear my mouth about it. I hurry up and finish showering, and when I'm done I wrap my towel around myself and head back into my room.

I almost scream my head off at the sight of Jackson laying on my bed. He's wearing nothing but his gorgeous smile, and I'm reminded of my dream from just a half hour ago.

"What are you doing here? We're supposed to be leaving in thirty minutes. You aren't even dressed!" I say, exasperated. Jackson can be really childish sometimes. Not gonna lie though. I am totally not complaining about the lack of clothing.

"Thirty minutes is a long time, Penny. Maybe we could cuddle for a little bit." He winks, and I know I've lost. he could get me to do just about anything with those piercing blue green eyes. I join him in the bed and tangle my legs with his.

~

"Meredith, drive faster! April's gonna kill us if we aren't there in three minutes!" I yell in frustration. Jackson's little cuddle session resulted in us falling back asleep. We're super late and we will never hear the end of it if we aren't on time.

"I'm going as fast as I can! Would you like me to speed and get pulled over? No one told you to have a little morning fun with your boyfriend when you knew we were on a tight schedule." She snaps. Wow, someone didn't have coffee this morning. I sigh, realizing she's right.

"For the last time, we were not having sex! We just accidentally fell asleep!" I try defending us, but Meredith isn't having it. I just let it go and hope we get there on time.

We do, and by the looks of it, we aren't the only ones who are late. We find April talking to Hunt, crying because she's afraid that she won't pass. I felt for her, but I wasn't about to cry about it.

I get on the bus while Jackson says goodbye to Mark. I love the relationship those two have. They're so cute. But don't let Jackson hear you say that. The last time I joked and said that he and Mark were "couple goals", he didn't talk to me for the rest of the day.

Everybody's on the bus except Alex and Meredith and we're all tired of waiting for them. I know they're my friends and all and I love them, but we need to get going. Meredith ended up coming. Zola is a little sick so we all understand why she's late. Alex is behind her. He's grumpy, as usual, so no one asks him why he's late.

The bus pulls away from the hospital, and we're on our way. After a short plane ride, we're in San Francisco, and I make a mental note to see my sister while we're here.

Not even two minutes in and April is already on someone's bad side. I don't know how the hell she does that. We all find a place to sit, but of course, there are only five seats and six of us. We all look around, wondering who's gonna be sitting on the floor. We race to the chairs, and of course, I'm the last one there. Just as I'm about to plop on the floor, hands grab my waist and pull me onto their lap. I look behind me and see Jackson smirking away. Whatever, at least I'm not sitting on the floor.

"Don't psych yourself out, April." Cristina tries to help.

"One in six people fail the boards." She responds.

Cristina scoffs. "Fine, psych yourself out."

"It's just a test. We've all dealt with worse. No one's bleeding out on your table. We will be fine." I say to her. She gives me a small smile, and hopefully that has given her some comfort.

Meredith pulls Cristina away, and I hear her say that Zola has the stomach flu, meaning that she might be sick too. That's definitely not good.

The entire group watched her threw up and everyone is pretty pissed. No one wants to be sick while taking the boards. I'm not mad, but I don't wanna be sick so I'm gonna steer clear of Mer. While we were waiting in line to get registered, we see Catherine, and Jackson tenses up.

She's one of the examiners and she wanted to wish us luck. She gave Jackson a kiss on the forehead and me a hug, before handing him a pencil. I laughed when he said it was his lucky pencil. What a dork.

We get checked into our hotel rooms and we all go in Jackson's room to start studying. April, of course started crying, again. I swear, if that girl wasn't the Virgin Mary, I'd think she was pregnant. She's been crying a ton lately. I wonder if something is up with her. Oh well. Not my problem.

I lie down in the bed, hoping to get a little rest. Of course Alex wants to hop on the phone with Robbins about one of his patients. I try not to pay attention, but when he says he's got to go back to Seattle, I'm all ears.

"Are you crazy? The boards are tomorrow, Alex!" I say. I love Alex to death but he sure is stupid sometimes. Only a crazy person leaves the day before boards when they could be studying. He ignored me, and walked out anyway. I let out an exasperated sigh. Rolling over on the bed, I close my eyes and try to sleep.

~

Once again, the annoying sound of my alarm clock wakes me up. I really need to set that thing to a more pleasant sound. Never mind it now though. I get out of the comfy bed, and it's only then do I realize that Jackson isn't there. He must already be in the shower. I grab what I need to shower, including my clothes because let's just say that nobody in this little group likes to knock and I'll be damned if Alex walks in at any given time and sees my goodies. He'll have a field day.

I brush my teeth and wash my face, and then shower. When I get out, I get dressed and then throw on a light layer of makeup consisting of concealer, mascara, and lip balm. Once all of my stuff is put away and organized, I put on my shoes and go to find Jackson.

The hallways in the hotel are empty, which seems weird because yesterday they were packed with all the residents studying, testing each other, reviewing flash cards. I walk past Mer's room and listen through her door to make sure she's awake. She is, and I'm pretty sure I hear Cristina in there with her. I hope she doesn't get sick.

I do the same with Alex's door, but it doesn't seem like he's back yet. I roll my eyes. Idiot. I'm just about to knock on April's door when it opens, and she comes out, looking slightly distressed.

"Morning. Have you seen Jackson at all? He isn't in the room." Her eyes widen and she stumbles past me. Weird. But, not as weird as the fact that Jackson comes out of April's room too, in nothing but his boxers.

"You've got to be shitting me." I say, before stomping back to my room.

Jackson cheated on me. With Kepner.

What. The. Fuck.

this chapter was loosely based off of grey's anatomy season 8 episode 21

a/n: most of the dialogue and characters in this story belong to shonda rhimes, and everybody included in the production of grey's anatomy. i do not claim to own either; i only own my oc, penelope coleman. this story is meant to entertain, not take credit.

grey's for the fandom meme !!

send me a fandom and i’ll tell you meme || accepting || from: @mademiistakes

the first character i ever fell in love with:Cristina, she’s my home girl, her sass and dry humour made me love her so much!!  her and mer’s friendship in what made me want to watch the show in the first place, BFF goals. 

a character that i used to love/like, but now do not:this makes me sad because i wrote her for years, but Callie, by the end of season twelve i was so happy to see her go after Shonda annihilated her character completely, i didn’t even recognise her by the time she left for new york. 

a ship that i used to love/like, but now do not:crowen  - they were my END GAME ship, but the writers tainted them so badly that i just ended up hating them by the end of season ten. 

my ultimate favorite character™:Mark Sloan, c’mon it had to be, didn’t it? i mean i was Mark Sloan™ back in the day so LMFAO, but seriously, i miss him so much. his character development came so far in the short-ish time ( relatively to the span on the show now ) and he is the most fun to write !! 

prettiest character:Jo Wilson && Stephanie Edwards are both fucking stunning ladies ( aka Camilla Luddington & Jerrika Hinton )

my most hated character:uh – Erica Hanh  ew. i hate her. she just fucking left my callie ( when i still loved her ) what a cow. 

my OTP:JOLEX JOLEX JOOOOOOLEX !! and MADDISON  !!  Also Mer & tequila, Mark  & not being dead, obvs. 

my NOTP:In canon  i  could NEVER get behind Merlex, mostly bc i knew shonda would ruin it, and thus ruin their friendship too. 

favorite episode:Season five, Dream a Little Dream of Me  part 1 & 2. because HELLO MAJOR HUNT !! 

saddest death:Mark, its been six (6) years and i STILL cannot watch it without bawling my eyes out.

favorite season:season five, & season 8 up until migration. because that’s where the show ended FITE ME.

least favorite season:anything past season 8 tbh. I hated season 12 though. it was terrible, and lacked consistency, and ruined my favourite character. 

character that everyone else in the fandom loves, but i hate:Derek, I’m not here for that saviour complex. Ladies can save themselves thanks. 

my ‘you’re piece of trash, but you’re still a fave’ fave:Alex, my favourite smart mouth little shit head. But i will not have a bad word said about him, and i rage quit at episode 9 of season 13 because i thought he was going to go to jail and haven’t went back since. 

my ‘beautiful cinnamon roll who deserves better than this’ fave:Jo, idk what’s going on in the show anymore bc i don’t watch, but like, they shit all over her consistently for years, and only bothered with her when she was being used as a plot device to Alex, which sucks, because she is SUCH an interesting character, and if you ever want her real backstory come at me because mine ( written before the show bothered to give her one ) is fucking better. 

my ‘this ship is wrong, nasty, and makes me want to cleanse my soul, but i still love it’ ship:uh — idk?? no one really. I’m pretty canon ship wise on grey’s tbh. 

my ‘they’re kind of cute, and i lowkey ship them, but i’m not too invested’ ship: i wish Stephanie and Jackson had been more of a thing, i think they were a better fit, tbh. UNPOPULAR opinion, but sue me. but i was never super invested, because they only used Steph as a plot device to get Japril back together~

Back with the Blackthorns S01E01 “Pilot”

This is my gift for my lovely friend Becca aka @thepurplewarlock || One day while we were talking I said that she could have an entire sitcom based off of her quirkiness and it lead to this || I’m not sure if I’ll write more about this so don’t get your hopes up too high(if you have hopes lol)

Rebecca heaved her luggage to the front door of the Los Angeles Institute. It was two PM; sweltering hot and she had gotten off her eight-hour flight. Usually, shadowhunters used portals to get around but it only took one look at that swirling mass of warped space and time to say NOPE. But right then she was wondering if she had made the right choice.

She wandered aimlessly on the beach, searching for a huge church. Five people had asked her if she was lost. She was tempted to say yes but how would she explain it? Yeah, I’m looking for some super attractive, demon-fighting people with cool tattoos and they live in an invisible church. Well, invisible to you. Have you seen them? And even her eyes hadn’t fully adjusted to the Sight yet. But when they finally did it slapped her in the face.

The Institute loomed over her. The cement was cracked, there were dents in the walls, and the backyard was abuzz with life; impressions made in the dirt and trees. People live in that old house, alright. Her people.

She reached the front door and rang the doorbell, which seemed newly installed like the large windows. It did little good to the weathered place. She heard shuffling and harsh whispering from the inside and then the door opened to reveal a tall, teenage boy with sea-green eyes that held distrust.

She felt a tad dazed but composed herself quickly. She beamed.

The boy shook his head, “You must be confused. Wherever you need to be, it’s not here. There’s a phone booth near the beach.”

Becca pushed up her sleeve to uncover the rune of angelic power on her wrist. The whispering stopped and suddenly people were crowding the door. She saw a beautiful blonde girl mutter, “I bet you five bucks she’s a lost Herondale, Kit”, to a smaller blond boy who looked as if he had too many tricks up his sleeve. Kit answered, “No way, Emma. She doesn’t look sarcastic enough.”

Becca thought of the name Herondale, she’d heard it being thrown around in Alicante with both negative and positive connotations.

“I’m not a lost Herondale”, she said, “I’m a recently ascended mundane from England as you can tell by my accent. I have chosen the name Rebecca Blackthorn.” She smiled shyly and quickly added, “But you guys can call me Becca.” Emma grumbled as she slipped green bills into Kit’s fingers—which held money with a certain familiarity of a con man but his eyes said no such thing.

The boy who opened the door was taken aback, “You don’t want that name. I’m ninety percent sure it’s cursed. Don’t use Herondale either.”

“Or Dearborn”, Emma growled. Somehow, his frown was etched even deeper into his tanned face.

“You guys can’t be so bad. You seem like a nice family.”

“That’s how we’re supposed to seem. Now please, go back to Alicante and change your name.”

Becca stammered, “B-but why don’t you want me here? You don’t even know me. I’d like to help.”

A cute, chubby girl who embodied her siblings’ traits asked, “Yeah, why Julian? I’ve only met like three people who don’t live in this house. She’s new.”

Julian replied, “It’s not that we don’t want you it’s just that we have a lot of emotional baggage and we need to be able to trust you completely.”

A brooding faerie glared under periwinkle locks, “I suggest we give her a test to assess her loyalty.”

Julian crossed him arms, “Kieran, loyalty takes time to build. You can’t just—”

“Okay. Here’s the test; Do you like lamps?”, queried a man with two-colored irises. One solid, the other metallic like the faerie’s. He practically bounced off the walls with his bubbly energy.

Becca decided to ignore the oddity of the question, “Lamps are nice. I like them.”

“That settles it. She’s a Blackthorn.”

Julian sighed, “Come on in, Becca.”

A girl volunteered, “Let me help you with that. I’m Livvy”, and grabbed the luggage.

Becca exclaimed, “Careful! I have precious cargo…” Mugs spilled from a hole in the pack. Twenty mugs along with a hundred tea bags. Eyes bored into her head.

A gray-eyed, obsidian-haired boy pondered, “Why are you smuggling tea of all things? There’s much more profit in the illegal drug industry. Unless… they’re vintage?”

Julian chided, “Ty! Don’t give her ideas.”

***

Becca was a bit embarrassed about her excessive mug collection but pride still filled her heart. And tea was currently filling her stomach. The warm cinnamon taste relieved her headache and near heat stroke. She thought, Why must California be so hot?

She missed her mundane family and friends in England. She had told them she was going to the U.S. to study. It was abrupt and questionable because she was so happy with her job and life but they wished her luck. She hoped she could go visit soon. Until then she was stuck in a room that lacked personality but it wasn’t all bad.

Earlier that day, Diana, the tutor had shown her around the place. Although, it didn’t keep the new shadowhunter from getting confused. She felt like leaving a trail of bread crumbs or more so—tea bags. Diana had also went through some training sessions—mental and physical— which left her bones and brain feeling like mush. She could hardly hold up her mug and sleep threatened to come but she wanted to stay up. To observe what vibes her new home gave off at night.

Here are the things she figured out during that day:

Everyone’s names

Everyone loves each other very much(almost frighteningly)

Mark is affiliated with multiple lamps?

Julian is the mom

Emma’s the fun uncle

Julian and Emma are in love with each other

Livvy, Kit, and Ty have a friend group together

Dru is slightly allergic to babysitting

Kieran has no idea what’s going on

Tavvy is a pure soul

Cristina needs a hug

THE KITCHEN IS THE MOST IMPORTANT PIECE OF INFRASTRUCTURE IN THIS HOUSEHOLD(as mentioned by Julian. He didn’t yell it but the undertone was clear)

Diana seems to be the only one with complete sanity(although with these kids it might disappear soon)

You may think that’s a lot to find out but Becca knew it was just the tip of the iceberg. She dozed off during dusk and awoke to yelling two hours later. She almost put on her gear until she realized the yelling sounded as if it came from arguing children. From the kitchen! The same kitchen where she kept her mugs. She scurried downstairs and took in the scene.

There was a cake, except it was now frosting-down on the floor. Livvy and Dru were going at it. They both claimed the other dropped the cake and Julian was trying to reason with the two. Kit and Ty were off in a corner, immersed in a card game that Ty was definitely winning. Cristina attempted to read a book but couldn’t stop herself from sneaking peeks at the drama. Diana simply gave everyone the “I taught you better than this” scowl. Then she saw it. Her mugs lay despairingly on the floor. She could see the cracks from a mile away. Kieran’s hair was cobalt as he was extremely annoyed. He stalked off outside.

In fact, everybody was annoyed. “What happened?”, Becca asked. She ran to her broken mugs.

Mark explained, “We made a cake to welcome you and apologize for our rudeness earlier. But one of the girls slipped over frosting and accidentally opened the cabinet leaving for a mug genocide. That action triggered another one of the girls to accidentally drop the cake. It was amazing but it’s gone now. Sorry, Rebecca.”

She glanced around the room as a chorus of “sorrys” was said. They were all sincere. Livvy and Dru calmed down; agreeing to share the blame. Becca left the kitchen with a million thoughts running through her mind. They destroyed my mug collection… but out of an act of friendship, she thought.

She went outside to take a breather. She met Kieran on the porch and queried, “How were you supposed to get back in if you can’t open the door?”

He stared at the stars and laughed without humor, “I guess I wasn’t going back in.”

“What’s got you so down?”

“I made up the idea and it backfired. You Nephilim can be so much sometimes.”

She didn’t answer.

“I’m sorry. I really am. I wanted this place to feel more warmer.”

She smiled, “This place is warmer. Partly because it’s California and partly because you are a really loving family.”

Kieran scanned her face, “How can you say that when we murdered your mugs?”

She grimaced at that thought but simply shook her head. “I can get new mugs. But I can’t replace memories. One day I’ll look back at this and laugh.”

Kieran nodded and gazed wistfully at the stars.

She sat next to him in one of those old-timey rocking chairs and decided to break the silence. “I feel as if I’m in a western film. All I need is a cowgirl hat and a southern accent. I’ve actually been working on one.”

Kieran raised a brow.

In an atrocious Southern accent she said, “There’s a snake in my boot.”

Both she and Kieran burst out laughing. Mark approached them, guffawing also. Between breaths he said, “That’s not a Western. That’s Toy Story.”

Becca mocked offense, “Are you telling me that you deny the existence of the most toy-based, action-packed, Western, Space-thriller animation ever created?”

Smugly he retorted, “Well maybe I am.”

Kit called from inside, “You’re both a disgrace to Disney!”

It only made the three go into another fit of laughter. When it finally died down, Mark handed Rebecca an unbroken mug, salvaged from the wreckage, full of hot, cinnamon tea. In the cool air her heart swelled and Kieran had a small smile play on his face.

Before she could thank him, Mark added, “Emma went to buy some donuts to make up for the cake. Again, we apologize.”

She exclaimed, “Well quit apologizing! What’s done is done. I’ll get over it.”

His eyes widened, “So you’re not mad? You don’t want to leave?”

“Of course not. Tonight was entertaining. I’d like to see more.”

Mark beamed and sat with the two. They talked that entire night, nothing too personal, just fun stuff. And when the donuts arrived you can bet that they let Becca have the first pick.

“What a marvelous excuse to eat junk food”, Julian teased.

Becca nudged him, “Marvelous indeed.”

But Diana constantly reminded that it wasn’t an everyday thing but she too wouldn’t miss out on the sugary deliciousness that was donuts.

I just want to talk about my long long relationship with Grey’s Anatomy. 

I remember watching the pilot with my family on March 27, 2005. I was 12 and scandalized by the first scene with naked Derek, but we all loved it anyway. 

The second season was THE SHIT! I think it was the one of the first shows that I HAD to watch week to week. The bomb episode! Denny! Meredith and Derek! I remember feeling full on conflicted because I really really liked Finn and Addison. 

Then the third season happened, I waited and waited for it to come back on the air and feel like it did before, but it was just baaaad. I remember watching the ferry episode being like what the fuckkkk are they doing. 

Then George and Izzie happened. And I straight up wrote a LETTER to Shonda Rhimes. There was no social media or anything to get out your grievances. I said something like, ‘they are best friends, they aren’t supposed to have feelings with each other. it just isn’t how they are with each other. also do more patient stories not just drama’ 

The fourth season also sucked. Every character was just super unlikeable, so I didn’t watch live religiously like I had before. (I downloaded episodes on iTunes onto my iPod and watched it through that little screen! what a time). But they pulled it together in the finale and Meredith made a candle house and Lexie and George were cute and I had hope again. 

But then 5th season happened and Denny!Ghost came back and I quit. I mean i looooved Denny when he was first on, but come on.I left that shit and did not turn back. I remember someone at school telling me Izzie and Karev got married and I didn’t care at all. 

But then I randomly caught a rerun with the “teach me” Sloan and Lexie scene and I was like ‘oh shit.’ So that summer, I bought all five seasons on DVD (which I still have) and rewatched all five seasons. Sloan x Lexie were my new obsession. Everyone else was ‘mehhh’

So I watched season 6 every Thursday and enjoyed it. I remember watching 6x14 Invest in Love and that made me love Calzona as a couple. Izzie left and I was sad and Invasion happened and Mercy West peeps came and I was like who are these mo’fos. I kinda hated how were were supposed to hate them right off the bat. I thought it was lazy writing. Charles was charming until he fucked over Izzie. The rest were whatever, except Reed she fucking suckedddd. 

Then Sloan and Lexie broke up in a stupid way and they both acted stupid the rest of the season. And I was upset and disappointed with all the episodes. Then the shooter. People love this episode but I hated it. 

I just thought like “this ONE OLD GUY is taking down an entire hospital. And like shooting randomly but not consistently. Like he didn’t shoot Bailey but he shot that nurse?” Also those SWAT guys were like the worst ever. They took soooooo long. But it was intense and it made for a great next season. 

The beginning of season 7 is one of my favorite few episodes. It was about rebirth and starting over and it was interesting and heartwarming. Cristina’s PTSD was really powerful. Lexie and Mark got back together just to break up like two episodes later. Lame. But everyone was really on there game. 

But I fell in love with April Kepner during her “we all have things we don’t talk about” speak. Yasss she slayed. Then her during the trauma simulation was hilarious. I even started liking the idea of her and Alex.

But then 7x08 happened and Alex was a dick and Jackson punched him. And THAT was when I fell in love with Jackson and the beginning seeds of Japril began to grow. 

The rest of the season wasn’t that memorable. Teddy and Henry were adorable. Jackson and Lexie got together but there were some good Slexie scenes to keep me interested. 

Season 8, I remember getting kinda uninterested half way through after Henry died. I did love Jackson choosing Sloan over Lexie, I thought that was hilarious twist to the love triangle. Then San Francisco happened and boy was I hooked. I had been subconsciously waiting for this for two seasons. Jackson and April were hilarious and hot during that bathroom scene. 

And the plane crash happened. And I was soooooooooo upset they killed Lexie. Like, she was my all-time favorite character at the time. I had invested four seasons of her and Sloan. I was pissed. So I said that I wasn’t going to watch anymore. (Sidenote: rewatched the episode, holy shit it is amazing. such a great episode) 

But then a lot of the stuff online was talking about April and Jackson and I was like shit... I like them. Maybe, I’ll just watch a few episodes and see if I still like the show. 

Season 9 is where i became OBSESSED. April and Jackson were amazing, I liked Jo and Alex, and Cristina and Meredith’s friendship was full-on cray cray in a good way. I thought it was insane to have Jackson propose in one scene and then break up with her in the next. Rewatching that scene and it still doesn’t make sense how he acted. Or how they were idiots in love for next full season. 

I loved the perfect storm episode, except the Arizona cheating which I thought again was lazy writing. 

The beginning of season 10 was rough for Japril shippers, like there wasn’t much to go on. I thought Jackson was such an idiot for so long. Like he denies denies denies until her fucking wedding day. I kinda wanted April to punch him and them have it out not just have her run away. Even though 10x13 was some of the purest most beautiful japril scenes ever. 

Season 11 was heartbreaking for literally everybody. Calzona got divorced. Japril baby died. Derek dies. I did like Amelia and Owen, but they were a mess like five minutes into it and never got it together. 

But those Jackson and april scenes are some of the best acted and written episodes that Grey’s has ever produced. That scene where April says, “its a boy” or when Jackson prays. Insane. So good. 

But then they did the time jump, again lazy writing. And April definitely seemed out of character to not even ask how her husband is for A YEAR. None of the story lines made sense for a year to go by. It was stupid. 

But April was super badass in the finale if it wasn’t heartbreaking for Japril fans. 

Season 12. Lowkey, I think that this is one of the best seasons of Greys. It was dramatic and funny and interesting. Japril was devastating but there was also so much hope left over. And they were both so scared about their kid. I mean 12x15 is Amazing for both jesse and sarah. I loved Arizona and April friendship, I even liked Nathan and Meredith and that finale was so good. April was a badass, Jackson was still obviously in love with her. Amelia and Owen were actually tolerable. 

Then season 13. This shit was terrible. LIke the writing was god awful. The maggie x nathan x meredith was so dumb. Minnick was the worst. The civil war thing was just dumb. Alex and Jo being miserable was terrible. Anything with Deluca (god he is just a useless useless character). 

But there was a beam of light of Japril, where they spent most of the season trying to coparent and coexist as not together while still obviously being in love with each other. Ugh where she sings “Faith” and then he asks her to move in. when he knows that she is “bored as hell” or when he says he doesn’t want them to move out or when he tries to be supportive as she dates. 

Then they fought for no reason and then Japril the sequel happened and we died and went to heaven. Just to be pulled right back down with eight terrible episodes and not just because japril doesn’t interact. but just because they are terrible. 

Then maggie and jackson in the finale and now season 14, which has already had its ups and downs. I loved the first two episodes and the 300th. 

BUT ANYWAY/ 

What i mean to say about this rambling rambling rambling text is that Greys goes in waves of being excellent and not so excellent. It does stupid storylines like George and Izzie and ghost denny and minnick, but it also does amazing storylines like japril and the plane crash and everything in between. So i am not giving up yet even as the shove jaggie down our throats. Because greys always has the ability to surprise me. 

post lord of shadows thoughts and predictions

okay time to round up all this shit in one post. this is still all over the place though sorry, it’s in no order just writing shit down as it comes to me. this is going to be super long and spoilery so it’s under a read more

1. I enjoyed Lord of Shadows much more than Lady Midnight. LM was good but it felt very bogged down in character and plot introduction, not its fault it had a lot to introduce lmao. Wasn’t super excited to read los after lm cause it wasn’t that memorable, but now I’m dying for Queen of Air and Darkness. 2. Since LM was (I’m pretty sure been a while) told exclusively through the older kids povs, ty and livvy felt super young despite only be 2 years younger than Julian and Emma, but they really felt like teenagers who are just tired of being treated and seen as children in this one. 3. Um I really feel for Malcolm. Like a lot. Listen I know he went a little of the deep end there, but no one could argue against that he loves Annabel more than anything. All the diary entries and the house he built for them honestly kill me. I really don’t believe he left her alone on purpose which makes me sad because Annabel died believing he betrayed her and that was one of the reasons she killed him. I’m excited to see him before he knew the truth about Annabel in TLH. 4. Speaking of Annabel holy shit. Something is definitely not right with her. I like how powerful she is and she was pretty endearing at the end, she actually kind’ve reminds me of cecily. also I’m dying cause I just remembered while writing this that everyone thought that Livvy looked alike Annabel kill me. I definitely didn’t think she meant to do what she did at the end, obvs an explanation is not an excuse 😏, but she lashes out and then gets scared. she seems to regret killing livvy the moment after it happens and I’m interested to see how this affects her. 5. So I guess with no inquisitor that exile thing is not gonna work. but I still believe that cortana will have something to do with breaking the parabatai bond…it can cut through anything after all. 6. Speaking of cutting through anything EMMA FUCKING BROKE THE MORTAL SWORD. LIKE THAT CAN NOT BE GOOD AT ALL. AND WHAT WAS THAT BLACK SHIT INSIDE OF IT??? 7. I’m scared what Livvy’s death is going to do to Julian because the guy has really been slipping down the mental health slope for a while now. not gonna lie, Julian was TERRIFYING in this book. he really doesn’t give a shit about anyone that isn’t Emma or family. also the red flag for me was when him and Emma were arguing and he smashed that glass, like that is not a good way to take out your anger, but I mean Emma immediately puts a hole in the wall so they’re both not the best examples for how to act in a healthy relationship. also, despite what he told Emma, he seems to be absolutely fine with breaking every other parabatai bond just to be with Emma. listen I love Julian but he seems to be slipping a lil into antagonist territory. 8. Not that Emma wasn’t cutthroat either. she didn’t even consider mercy when it came to Annabel, she was gonna slice right through her, u know until the unseelie king spirited her away. 9. Kit and Ty were adorable. also has it been confirmed that they’re the Wicked Power protagonists? because if not I’m p sure they are. 10. I was so happy to be back at the London Institute. I loved all the little tid and tlh hints everywhere (jem and will’s height charts 😭😭😭) um so Bridget is still super alive somehow uuuuhh?? how??? jessamine is a darling brat as usual. love her. also that line where Magnus said they weren’t the first to think to burn down the blackthorn manor?? tlh reference maybe? 11. while Mark/Emma will always hold a place in my heart I really warmed up to Emma/Julian and Mark/Cristina/Kieran. btw I really feel like that’s gonna end in polyamory, I think cc has been wanting to write and actual poly relationship ( I love herongraystairs but I don’t think it technically counts going by only canon) for a while now, and while only Mark/Cristina and Mark/Kieran were introduced in lm, Cristina and Kieran def gotta a lot closer in this book and seemed to have a lot of romantic tension. anyway new ot3. 12. if u know anything about me u know I’M A SLUT FOR JEM AND TESSA. anytime they were mentioned I started breathing heavy. still sad they didn’t actually appear in this one, but it seems set up for them to appear in the final one speaking of… 13. listen I love Magnus and I want no harm to come to him but TESSA IS SICK I CANT DEAL WITH THIS. LIKE CAN HER AND JEM JUST BE HAPPY AND HEALTHY WITHOUT SOME INCURABLE ILLNESS HANGING OVER THEM. and like what other warlocks have been affected??? IS CATARINA OKAY? 14. y'all that guy with green skin has gotta be ragnor there is not doubt in my mind. cc has always regretted killing him and I’ve been waiting for this tree colored man to return for a while now. I want to know why he’s in hiding tho and he like bolted when Magnus showed up on the scene. 15. EY YO FUCK THE COHORT AND FUCK ZARA. at first I thought they were a little too cartoony of villains, like there was no complexity to them, they just seem like straight up douche nozzles all the time, but then I remembered that they’re based off real issues right now and people really do think like this sooo. but like Zara is absolutely the worst, how dare and her awful buddies talk shit to my children. everytime anything came out of her mouth I was like-LETS GO. OUTISDE. RIGHT NOW. TRIAL BY COMBAT, YOU LYING SNAKE. 16. I really loved the seelie and unseelie courts and their differences. like I agree cc is a little long winded, but her writing has greatly improved since CoB and it really showed in this one for me. I like the unseelie king and I hope we get to see more of him in the next book, and maybe more of Kieran’s brothers, wouldn’t want to let all those cute faerie boys go to waste. 17. as much as I hate to say it, I’m p sure that the seelie court member that was stolen by the unseelie was Sebastian’s and the seelie queen’s kid. LIKE I HOPE IM SO WRONG AND THAT THAT FUCKING KID DOESNT EXIST BUT ALL SIGNS SEEM TO BE POINTING TO HELL CHILD. 18. speaking of Sebastian, the way cc was talking about him before los came out, I was really expecting something big about him to happen, like his ghost (or demon seed ugh) he was barely even mentioned except closer to the end there. 19. oh yeah I can’t believe Clary’s dead???? like I’ve never been a big fan of clary or jace but the way she talked about like she’s already accepted it killed me. like if this happens it’s going to ruin jace. 20. I’ve become very endeared to Dru throughout los, I think she’s my fav blackthorn besides Julian. she’s chubby which is fucking GREAT and tho the whole pretend I’m not 13 thing with Jaime made me a lil uncomfy, he didn’t really flirt with her or anything and their friendship was really cute. it seems to me cc is setting her up with that Ash kid that appeared for 2 seconds. YO @emmascxrstairs JUST ROCKED MY WHOLE WORLD AND SAID THAT ASH IS THE DEMON SPAWN AND IM MAD BECAUSE OF COURSE HE IS LMAO FLEW RIGHT PAST ME. 21. that’s one thing that kills me with cc books, is that other than the main romances it’s usually super easy to tell who ends with who, and that she feels the need to pair EVERYONE OFF. lmao I was actually wondering why a love interest hadn’t been introduced for Livvy yet (Kit doesn’t count cause after that first kiss, it was real obvs him and ty were gonna be the thing) and then she died and I was like…oh…that’s why. 22. like many predicted, Diana is trans and im crying she’s amazing. her and Gwyn caught me off guard but I’m not gonna lie, they’re really cute. 23. also omg I just thought with livvy dying, what if Julian blames it on himself and the parabatai curse kill me. 24.so yeah all in all 👌👌👌 very good would recommend. now time to get fucking pumped for the last hours

grey's anatomy 👀

​[like 1000000 years later oops. also i’m far too wordy, i just can’t help it i could talk about greys forever and ever.]

my all-timeultimate fave character: C A L L I O P E  I P H E G E N I A  T O R R E S

a character ididn’t used to like but now do: mark. i started at s5, so i didn’t knowhim at all, i didn’t know his relationship with callie, he was just this annoyancegetting in the way of calzona and messing with lexie. going back and watchingthe rest, i totally fell in love. he’s so sweet and kindand selfless and such an amazing friend to callie. i miss him always.

a character i usedto like but now don’t: i quite liked owen at first, but after he publicly yellsat and shames cristina with “you killed our baby” over the abortionhe told her he supported (and then cheats on her and makes it out to be herfault because loving a woman who doesn’t want kids is just so hard) he is deadto me and i will never ever forgive him.

a character i’mindifferent about: april, maybe? ben?

a character whodeserved better: SO MANY. callie deserved better than her last season and exitbeing following a mediocre love interest. lexie and heather didn’t deserve todie, or the death they got. mark deserved his happy ending with addison and hiskid. teddy didn’t deserve having her husband killed off as soon as she’s happy thenbeing written out. erica deserved so so much better. amelia deserves better thanthe abusive piece of trash owen. steph deserves actual storylines andscreentime…

a ship i’ve neverbeen able to get into: mark/lexie I’M SORRY DON’T HATE ME.

a ship i’ve neverbeen able to get over: CALZONA. and maddison. we could have had itaaaaaaaaaaall.

a cute, low-keyship: addison/izzie. they interacted like…3 times? but they could have beensuper cute. and steph/amelia. if only!

an unpopular shipbut i still enjoyed it: tbh i didn’t mind callie/penny. as an interimrelationship that led callie back to arizona? they were cute. as the reasoncallie gave up a phenomenal career and left the extended, supportive familyshe’d built and fucked over her ex wife’s relationship with their kid? hell no.

a ship that wastotally wrong and never should have happened: it hasn’t exactly“happened” yet, but i haaaaaaaatemeredith/riggs. it’s borderline abusive already. the number of times she’s toldhim to back off and he’s kept pursuing her and been encouraged by herdismissal… that behaviour should not be romanticised. it doesn’t matter thatmeredith was/is kind of interested, or how she’s acted, she told him no repeatedly and he needs to listen to that. if she changes hermind, fine, but that’s her decision and he needs to leave her the fuck aloneand let her make it. greys is wonderful in so many ways but it does have aproblem often with toxic masculinity (see: owen, see: george, etc) and leadinginto that, like toxic heterosexuality or something.

my favouritestoryline/moment: callie’s speech about religion to her dad in s6 was so incrediblypowerful and incredibly important to me, combined with arizona’s follow updefending her, and the cuddle in the on-call room - that whole thing is pretty special. arizona’s disability storyline in s9 wasalso incredibly powerful and impactful and it hurt, god it hurt, but i’m so overwhelminglythankful they did it.

a storyline thatnever should have been written: THE CALZONA CHEATING. i just loooooooove allthe ableist calzona fans blaming it on her disability too.

my first thoughtson the show: “what. is. going. on?!” (i started at s5 for calzona, sothe first thing i saw was that scene where all the candles in the house ofcandles go out and meredith imagines derek dying. it was a lot.)

my thoughts now: myhappy place, my forever love, despite so much crap lol.

i just finished reading lady midnight

WHY DID IT TAKE ME SO LONG TO READ IT? This book is oo good!!!! 

- Ty’s definitely my favorite character. I suppose he has autism?? If so, it’s the first time i see it it in literature and i feel like i was very educated about the condition while reading the book so that’s a big plus. (Go cassandra!! Representation matters!!). Also i ‘m super excited to see where the whole thing with Kit will go; will it be something romantic?? i don’t even care tbh as long as they become friends i’m happy

-Mark’s also on of my faves. Honestly, i really love the whole faerie thing, not just in cassies’s books, but in general… So Mark and the Wild Hunt and being part faerie was SO exciting for me when i was reading the book. Ty may be my favorite, but mark definitely comes in a close second. At first i wanted him to be with Cristina but then Kieran came along and i was so torn between them lmao. Actually i was really pissed with how cassie handled the Kieran situation if i’m being honest???? i hate when Main Character loves Person 1 but then meets Person 2 and starts liking them and then the author makes Person 1 screw up so Main Character can (so conveniently) stay with Person 2 without guilt. It’s such a weak plotting, it’s one of the few things i truly disliked on the book. BUT THEN. He ended up with Emma and i’m super super super excited because before i started reading LM i thought they would be thing and then they weren’t and i was a little disappointed but then they were and i was really surprised. Can’t want to see how Emma/Mark will go in book2.

- I LOVE CRISTINA. I really don’t have much to say about her except I LOVE HER SO MUCHH AAAAAA

-Emma was okay. I like the way se was super bloodthirst with revenge and didn’t feel guilty when malcom died. It’s interesting to see a different, not so kind and merciful protagonist.

- Julian was so different from what i thought he’d be lmao. I was expecting this really sweet and caring cute boy, but he is DARK. The whole sweet boy thing is how he is seen by the others, it’s not how he truly is - at least not completely. He has darkness in him and I can’t wait to know see it unravel more in the rest of the series.

- Malcom being a villain was predictable tbh. I kinda knew it was him for a long time, but still i like the way Cassie showed us that what he did was wrong but understandable. The Blackthorns had been horrible to him and to Annabel, it’s comprehensible to why he lost his mind. What i didn’t like though, was how as soon as we found out he was a bad guy he turned into this cartoonish villain: evil smiles, stating that he always hated the blackthorns, telling emma his super evil plan etc. Too childish, in my opinion.

-I love all blackthorns siblings. I need Helen also. I hope she’ll be back on the next book aaaaaaaaa.

Book 2 will be out IN MAY. IT’S JANUARY NOW. How am i supposed to wait for so long????