#and i have this friend who all we tend to talk about is sex bc were both thots
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as much as we all joke abt when straight girls will see a lesbian couple being sweet/cute/etc and start talking abt how they wish they were gay and we kind of joke back with basically just like "honey..." etc implying that they might be bisexual/lesbian
I think deeper than that it comes down to the fact that these women are deeply lonely and mistreated by the men in their lives who they ARE attracted to. like yeah I'll make those jokes as well and I'm sure some of them are probably bisexuals or lesbians who haven't realized that yet, but I feel like more of them just see a couple where two partners are obviously actually deeply affectionate w each other and best friends and feel a lot of yearning.
bc it's no secret that many straight men just plain hate women and see them as sexual objects rather than partners or friends. and these same straight women also tend to obsess over romance novels and romcoms and romance dramas on TV for the same reasons, bc these fictionalized men written for women actually give a fuck about their partners beyond their use for sex. now if they're sitting there in their free time constantly obsessing over lesbian romance content THEN that's definitely something gay going on but....... mostly I do think straight women are just, by and large, incredibly lonely romantically and it sucks to see other people having something you can't imagine for yourself w the partners available to you
#this isn't an issue btw like I don't think these jokes are Harmful just#smth I was thinking abt yk?#being straight just seems incredibly lonely ngl
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True soulmates (BC 21)
Ben Chilwell x reader
Warnings: mostly fluff, mentions of sex, angst, (Lance Stroll is mentioned as the ex boyfriend, sorry to all my Lance girlies)
Summary: what can a footballer give you more that your ex boyfriend couldn’t? what can one find in the arms of an childhood friend?
“Either you tell me the truth or you’ll never see me again!” Lance’s hand was on the door knob, waiting to be unlocked.
“What can’t you understand? Me and Ben are simply friends. I’ve known him my whole life!” I shout to his face, clearly being pointed as the liar once again.
“And that’s the problem! He’s too comfortable around you that thinks he can flirt with you even when I’m in the same room!” He is pulling his hair from frustration, trying not to scream.
“He isn’t flirting! Lance, come on. We’ve been together for two years. Ben is old enough to know what’s right or wrong”
“I tolerated him for two years and that’s enough. If I can’t reason neither of you, then there’s no point in us being together anymore” Lance’s words are bitter. They instantly hurt.
I don’t move. I only let my hot tears run down my cheeks, pooling my eyes and causing them to take a light shade of red.
“Even when we are away at races, he still somehow manages to capture your attention more than I do.”
His words may stab me like a knife but are true. Me and Ben were attached to the hip ever since I can remember. If I am not spending time with my family or Lance, it's definitely around Ben or along with his teammates. When I am with Lance on a race weekend, Ben and I tend to FaceTime a lot, because I skip a lot of his games with Chelsea.
That's when Christian's words echo once again in my brain
"You two are the definition of true soulmates. Completing each other."
"Do I lack in something? Is there something I can't give you that he can? Please tell me, Y/N!" the pleading Canadian's eyes were full in pain and lost all possible faith in me.
Lance has been nothing but an absolute sweetheart to me all those years. Introduced me from the very first moment to his friends, family, fellow f1 drivers. He has made me feel so many wonderful emotions, such as happiness, joy, pride, excitement.
And many more emotions but not one...that is love.
“I’m sorry Lance. I truly am.” I lower my head and let the tears drop on the floor. Why did this had to happen?
I can see his shadow approaching me and his fingers under my chin, raising my head so I can look him in the eyes. He isn’t mad. He looks disappointed and also sad. I feel awful for causing him pain.
“I didn’t want to make you feel like this! I swear if I could turn back time, I-“
“It’s okay. I am the one who’s sorry. I feel like you were wasting your time with me, when you should have been with someone else.”
“That’s not the case Lance! I love you. So very much.”
“Just not the way you love him”
It was the bitter truth. The comfort and security Ben made me feel was like no other. I always knew that my love for him was something special. I just had to bury it deep down and lock it up for the sake of our friendship.
“I know you love me Y/N. And I do too. I’ve spent two amazing years with you. You’ve been immense support to me. When everyone talked shit about me, you were the one to talk them down and defend me. That’s something I’ll forever cherish”
“And I will continue doing so. Whoever ends up in your arms, I hope she’s the one. No matter what, I will be a call away”
Lance wraps me into a final hug. I inhale deeply and close my eyes as I exhale. The pain was out of my body. If I could repay him in any way, I would do it in a heartbeat.
“If you ever feel like coming to a race again, hit me up. I’ll be more than happy to see you around. The guys too.”
“Of course. Keep an eye for me on the paddock. Good luck on everything. Goodbye Lance”
“Go tell him the truth. I’m sure there’s a happy ending awaiting”
————————————————————————
I look the time at my phone, 15:30. Since I was still in Silverstone, I had to travel all the way back to Cobham. He was still in training. I couldn’t show up at his house unannounced.
On the way back, silence is almost deafening so I decide to call the player I know is in practice but will surely pick up
“To what do I owe the pleasure?”
“I’m coming over Chris. Don’t tell it to anyone and especially Ben”
“Uhhh, aren’t you supposed to be in Silverstone with Lance? What happened”
“I made a huge mistake. To which you helped me realize and Lance”
“Wait, did you guys brake up? And what did I do?”
“Nothing bad Puli. Don’t worry. Just helped me realize the truth”
“Oi, who’s on the phone? New girl captain?” I can hear Ben from the other side of the line, approaching Christian
“I’m hanging up. Don’t tell anyone!” And I immediately close the line. If Ben knew I was coming back he’d start calling me, asking questions I can’t possibly answer from the phone.
There are a million questions going back and forth in my mind right now.
What will Ben say?
Will he laugh at me?
Will he ever talk to me again?
Will we even be friends after this?
Will he hate me?
The list goes on as I finally reach the training center. Now it’s 17:00 and about time they finish practice.
I see Mason with Christian and Ben in the middle of their group. Christian is the first one to eye me, nudging Mason, who has a questioned look on his face.
Finally, Ben realizes his friends have gone quiet and raises his head and my heartbeat too.
“Y/N? Are you okay? What happened?” Ben rushes towards me, abandoning Mason and Christian.
“Aren’t you supposed to be two hours away in Silverstone?” Mason asks but before I could answer Christian drags him away
“We will talk later Ben. Text us when you get home” the American says as he walks away with his fellow British footballer, whispering something in his ear
I can’t feel my legs. My throat and mouth are all dried up. My stomach is tangled and my heart is racing faster than any car.
“You’re literally shaking. Did something happen between you and Lance? Did he hurt you?”
“No” is the only word I manage to utter. Great!
“No he didn’t hurt you or no nothing happened?”
“He didn’t hurt me” I can’t even look him in the eyes
“So something else happened?”
It’s now or never!
“We broke up. We had a fight. We ended things in good term and he told me to come here.”
“Why did you guys break up? And is he stupid? He kicked you out?”
“He didn’t kick me out. He suggested I came here and give you some explanations”
“Me? What did I do? Why do I need explanations?”
Oh god. This is horrifying.
“Ben, the reason we broke up is because i don’t love him”
“Oh”
“I love you”
And terror rushes all over my body.
He isn’t saying anything.
I am starting to get even more scared.
“Y/N..”
“I’m sorry Ben. You had to know. It’s totally okay if you don’t feel the same way. First and foremost I want us to remain friends. We’ve known each other so many years that I’d be a pity to ruin everything over a silly thing I said”
“I don’t find it silly at all” he finally says
Ben raises my head by placing two fingers under my chin. Once he takes a look at my teary red eyes and quivering lips, he brings his lips onto mine, placing a soft kiss on them. He deepens the kiss, wrapping his arms around my waist. Instead of feeling suffocated, I feel even more alive than before.
It’s a kiss I’ve been dreaming of having with him. No one else but Ben. Years of anticipation and now this happens. Like a dream came true.
“This will sound extremely selfish but I couldn’t wait for the day you’d finally land in my arms” he whispers in my ear as I have my face cupped by his hands
“I couldn’t let myself fall in love with anyone else. Not when you are here. It felt so wrong and unfair.”
“You can’t even imagine how many nights I’ve spent sleepless, wanting to say those three words to you, Y/N”
“You can now”
“I love you. I will love you for as long as it takes. And will continue to do so. I’m sorry for not saying how I feel sooner. I could have had you in my arms way sooner”
“Well, as Christian said, we are true soulmates, so one way or another, we always were together.”
#ben chilwell#ben chilwell x reader#ben chilwell x y/n#ben chilwell one shot#ben chilwell fanfic#ben chilwell fluff#chelsea
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I never understood why Feyre is labeled as E/riel shipper when after acowar she never mentioned them ever again. she even talked about Lucien's glove to Elain and how she should use them to not get her hands hurt in her bonus chapter. or how in acofas Feyre kept encouraging the two to talk that Mor told her to get out of their business and let them deal with it themselves!! I think she stopped engaging the idea after Rhys told her so but I'm not sure, what I'm sure about is she never thought about Elain with Azriel after acowar.
or how they keep saying she will be mad at Rhys for stopping them while Rhys other than proving Az only wanting Elain for sex, he brought up some good political reason that could put their court in danger AND most importantly their baby! do they really think she wouldn't also be mad at Az for putting them in danger bc he was horny?
It's probably because they tend to cling to the one part that validates their belief without giving much thought to the context that surrounds it.
The same reason why they would say Azriel "wouldn't go so far as to call Gwyn a friend" is because that's verbatim from his chapter. This completely ignores the fact that he didn't correct Clotho about his relationship with Gwyn or express how he felt after the necklace was given away.
Feyre asked why they weren't matched, similar to Azriel's inquiry about why the third sister wasn't assigned to him.
However, you should also consider why she didn't want it to be Lucien. She held anger and weariness towards him for what transpired in the Spring Court.
Despite this, she continued to encourage Elain to get to know Lucien. She even went as far as showing her trust in Lucien again after the war and nudged Elain, who then invited him to live with them again.
She specifically pointed out how, throughout the rest of the year, Lucien was willing to turn a blind eye to those he had every reason to hate and be angry with, all to offer them help.
Azriel only said coldly, “If Lucien kills Graysen, then good riddance.”
...
Lucien had encountered him, I realized. Somehow, in living with Jurian and Vassa at that manor, he’d run into Elain’s former betrothed. And managed to leave the human lord breathing.
Feyre observes Lucien literally fighting against his instincts.
She mentioned the lack of communication between Elain and Lucien but didn't mention the time Azriel and Elain spent together.
Feyre didn't ask Elain for her opinion on Azriel, remind her to reject the bond, or reinforce her belief that Elain and Azriel were a better match, even after their lengthy conversation during Solstice, especially in front of Rhys.
Feyre, Nesta, Cassian, and Rhys have all noticed and mentioned something about the Elucien dynamic that we, as readers, need to know.
But little about Elain and Azriel other than it's weird.
Even Nesta's observation over Azriel's brooding at Solstice:
Then his gaze shifted to Elain, and though it was utterly neutral, something charged went through it. Between them. Elain’s breath caught slightly, and she gave him a shallow nod of greeting before brushing past, leading Nesta into the room.
Mor lounged on a green velvet couch before the fireplace;
Nesta didn't say anything about this exchange but she did have something to say about this:
Elain, the wretch, had taken the seat between Feyre and Varian, about as far from Lucien as she could get.
I also don't think that Nesta knows how Azriel felt about Elain either.
Azriel lingered near the door, quiet enough that when Feyre and Mor began talking about some of her paintings, Nesta went over to him.
“Why don’t you sit?”
She leaned against the doorway beside the shadowsinger.
“My shadows don’t like the flames so much.”
A pretty lie. She’d seen Azriel before the fire plenty. But she looked at who sat close to it and knew the answer.
I find it interesting that Nesta talked about exactly where Mor was sitting (in front of the fireplace), and it was Feyre and Mor who were conversing before she went up to Azriel. There was no mention of what Elain was doing at that time or how close to the fire she was sitting.
This once again highlights how E/riels tend to invalidate just how deeply Azriel felt for Mor and blatantly ignore all the obvious signs of his attraction to her, all in favor of their preferred ship.
Mor and Azriel had four books of in-your-face buildup as well, but it seems like SJM has made it now mean nothing.
Shadows darkened his eyes, full of enough pain that she couldn’t stop herself from touching his shoulder. Letting him see that she understood why he stood in the doorway, why he wouldn’t go near the fire.
His secret to tell, never hers.
It's worth noting that Nesta's observation wasn't about her figuring out that Azriel liked Elain. Instead, it was her acknowledgment that Azriel was standing back, likely because he was hurt about something, and when he was ready to speak about it, he would.
If most of their "evidence" is based on events up to ACOSAF, and there is limited evidence from ACOSF, except of his bonus chapter that's canon for Elain but not for Gwyn with the exception of half a sentence, that's a pretty telling sign to me that SJM is moving away from that pairing. Conversely, in almost every instance where Lucien is mentioned, there is some form of connection to Elain, reminding us that SJM has not forgotten about them.
The only person who did take notice of E/riel was Rhys and had something definitive to say.
Considering how the inner circle typically reacts when Rhys says something, his words carry much more significant weight.
After all, even Feyre understood and forgiven Rhys for keeping the pregnancy risk hidden from her.
#elain x lucien#elucien#pro elucien#antie/riel#feyre is an elucien#so is rhys#so is the entire inner circle#cherrypicking canon never works out
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Another anon here and regarding straights enjoying queer fiction, there's a perspective I think is worth sharing (for the record, I'm not straight).
So there's a huge fanbase consisting of straight cis women who enjoy mlm content. It's a thing to the point where there's gay shows made specifically targeting this fanbase.
I got to talk to one of my friends who dabbled in this stuff. I asked her why? What's the draw? She pointed out sth I thought was pretty interesting.
She said that for straight girls it can be pretty hard to enjoy straight pairings because they will always experience the story through the eyes of the female character, who is also limited by societal rules or even gender roles. By watching/reading a mlm, there's no female perspective, which takes away all the irl problems.
For example, take the "if guys get sex it's a flex, if girls get sex it's a shame" bullshit. By watching mlm instead of mlw and watching through one or both male characters, they can escape the whole stigma altogether.
To take a step further, since there's an inherent safety/advantage in being a guy in many situations. They can sort of experience that freedom through taking the female character out of the equation. It's sort of like getting gender euphoria but instead it's gender role freedom euphoria???
Theres also the male gaze problem. The majority of straight shoes have gender roles to varying degrees, which skewers the power dynamic within the pairing. This makes it hard for straight girls to enjoy pairings bc they will always be put into a position where they notice inequalities toward them. So again escape.
Anyways, what I'm trying to say is, I agree that this topic is pretty complex.
It is! It's very complex. But just to kind of comment on some of your points - a lot(not all) of the straight women who consume mlm media tend to consume it to the exclusion of everything else.
I could possibly understand the points your friend made better if they also consumed things like mlw media and fics written by women, or wlw fics/media at all. But they generally don't, especially not the latter. Often times a lot of straight women mass-consumers of mlm fic and commercial media, in my experience at least, tend to treat wlw content with disgust, ridicule, or flat out indifference. Perhaps not to the same vitriolic degree straight men tend to treat mlm content compared to wlw content, but it's still there. So that kind of... makes me question if they're actually being entirely honest with themselves as to why they're consuming the specific content that they do.
I'm just saying, straight women can be just as guilty as straight men when it comes to how and why they approach the specific queer media that they do, especially when it's to the exclusion of other kinds of queer pairings.
Because I pose this: if it really all falls down to power dynamics and releasing themselves from the male gaze, then why focus exclusively on a gendered pairing that just erases the woman entirely? Why a pairing that focuses solely on a basic personal sexual preference? Makes women irrelevant to existence? Why not gravitate toward more straight women writers who thwart or rewrite a lot of those societal gender inequities that effect women within their work? Why not give respect or audience to wlw content that makes the male gaze and male/female power dynamics irrelevant as well?
See what I'm saying?
That being said, it's still not my job to police that consumption for all the same reasons I said in that last post. And to reiterate, I'm not saying your friend is wrong for feeling how she feels or that she's making it up. I don't think that at all! People have a lot of complex feelings, which is why this topic is inherently complex. I just think two things can be true at the same time, even when we may not realize those biases about ourselves
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Okay so I’m not a huge fan of Kate Callahan, not going to lie. Through out the season it feels like the life schedule of the BAU just doesn’t fit with her a lot (Mainly bc they push this “she has a kid a home” thing a lot, especially with how s10 ends, but she’s a new character we don’t have the connects that we have with JJ and Morgan or even Hotch, who all tend to deal with that same work/life balance.)
But Kate does have come good moments
For example I do actually really like the kind of sly stuff she implies while talking to people their interrogating and stuff
Example from S10 Ep 6 If a Shoe Fits
Some guys records sex tapes with out the women knowing pretty much, and the person their interrogations knows the law so he’s not falling for he’s a fault for receiving these video from his friend, so Kate (especially with her previous job) says something about them being in jail for 20yrs (I don’t look for quotes rn lol)
Very rough quote “Well maybe one of those girls was 3 months shy of 18” (Morgan reveals to us, pretty much right after none of them were, when he says something to Kate about it as she walks out of the room)
Then literally the next episode S10 ep11 HashTag
They’re at the part where everyone’s pointing guns at the unsub with a hostage in a parking garage and the media pulls up (for a serial killer that wanted fame and recognition) leading unsub to hurt the victim and forcing Morgan to shoot the teenage unsub
While Morgan and JJ both go to the injuries two, Kate straight up yell in the background “WHAT THE HELL WERE THINKING” at the media people
I also like the moments when her and Reid do talk a bit and she always ends in sarcasm and Reid never understands lmao
Tbh Kate had potential but they kind of threw her in there and didn’t seem to let her character really have a fit into the team phase like Alex Blake did before her. They just say something about the team “already knowing her” and never give a good adjustment to have her mesh with the team more or anything.
#criminal minds#criminal minds dr spencer reid#criminal minds Kate Callahan#kate callahan#dr spencer reid#criminal minds spencer reid#spencer reid#do I always mention. Reid in these posts…#yes#yes I tend to do that#I don’t deny#lmao
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what do you think of gay steve? i don't dislike the headcanon in theory, but i feel like it's usually done as a way to make steve & nancy's relationship/breakup less important (and often to make it easier to ship r0nance)
i gotta be honest i dont think i've actually ever read any fic where steve is explicitly stated to be gay and not bisexual, besides maybe my own fic nancy drew and the mystery of the magnetic closet, so idk if i'll rly have whatever answer ur looking for re: other people's intent. in magnetic closet i wrote steve as being a bit uncertain as to his identity, leaning gay, but he also explicitly tells nancy that he loves her and their relationship is still significant to him, so like. like MY motivation wasn't downplaying their relationship so at the very least that isn't Everyone's motivation.
anyway like separately from how people Use It in fic i'm into gay steve! i tend to default to bi steve for like fic and headcanons etc bc it's sorta become the fandom standard and a lot of my bi friends like bi steve and i love my bi friends 💖 but if i'm being honest i do think that you can easily interpret a lot of steve's canon behavior in favor of him being gay if you want to do so, and i think i tend to lean that way when i'm writing him even when i don't mean to. just to like preface all of this i'm gay myself and i am terrible about projecting onto steve so yknow take all of the following with a grain of salt.
so like personally i think he never rly had romantic feelings for robin and he only confessed to liking her because he thought his love for robin Had to be attraction since she's a girl yknow? and in s4 it's implied that he's had a string of casual relationships based entirely on sex and he hasn't been able to connect with any of the girls at all which is a bit 🧐🤨. the way steve flirts indiscriminately and talks about wanting a family in the future makes me think like... i think that his search for love is more about wanting a family/wanting love than specifically wanting to be with a woman. like i think in his mind bc of Eighties Heteronormativity the two things are equated, so when he Thinks that he wants to find the female love of his life he Actually just wants a family. and i fear i'm making it sound like steve is a misogynist who just wants a wife to give him kids which is not my intent. like i think steve has a lot of respect for nancy and loves her deeply regardless of whether that love is romantic in nature or not. the fact that he said he was over nancy in s3 while confessing feelings to robin, dated around a bunch, and then suddenly had feelings for her again in s4 comes off less to me like "steve never got over nancy" and more like "steve is unable to find the kind of love he wants with a woman no matter what he tries and he's returning to nancy because he thinks that he just messed up their relationship with his flaws and if they tried again he could be better and everything would be perfect." like nancy was the closest steve ever came to actually being in love with a girl and as time passes he realizes that he doesn't think he could feel that way with another woman. but the thing is that stancy was just not a great couple yknow but they had these external pressures on their relationship that allow them to look back on it and think well maybe NOW we'll be more compatible and we can be happy. like it's this subconscious belief that being in the right relationship could make Everything in his life right.
idk i think at this point i'm just rambling and i fear i'm making no sense but like i think gay steve is really interesting to think about Because his relationship with nancy was so important to him. like it's genuinely really compelling to explore their relationship through the lens of compulsory heterosexuality and consider like the sort of friendship they might have in the wake of steve realizing that he's gay. i also think it's interesting to think about in the context of his friendship with robin and like how radically different their journeys are while simultaneously being kinda the same.
ultimately though since he's like presumed straight in canon i don't think it rly matters whether people hc steve as gay or bi? like it's kinda just whatever you want.
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okay here’s an idea. this is definitely the messiest idea I’ve ever suggested Erin so please forgive me for my sins and as always please do not feel obligated to write this one. Much like Birthday Wishes, I kinda just thought this might entertain you and if you feel inspired to write it cool, but no pressure from me!
So reader and Steve are hanging out with the older crew, talking about relationships. Somehow it comes up that reader is talking about how Steve is pretty insatiable (likes to have a lot of sex). And Steve comes back with come on I know you like it just as much as I do.
So Steve and reader are getting in the car to head home and reader’s like I love our sex life but I could definitely last longer without than you can babe, and Steve takes the bet and the games begin!
Then there are a series of scenes with the reader and Steve teasing each other mercilessly starting subtle and getting increasingly less so. At some point Steve’s casually playing with reader’s nipples while they’re watching tv bc that’s a surefire way to get her going. Another time Steve’s restocking at Family Video and reader does *something* and then just leaves him hanging with a boner as he groans/yells “that was definitely cheating!” as she walks out the store all smug.
Eventually they are both desperate to end the bet. Maybe they’re out at a picnic with the group, doing all these little things or making comments to push the other one over the edge. Reader casually takes off her sweatshirt and surprise! she’s sporting a particularly tight/low top (it’s boobies!). Steve’s got on the tightest jeans known to man (and as we know bro is caked up and I dunno maybe he takes off his shirt and gives us some chest action? idk) and at some point neither of them can take it anymore and Steve’s finally like OK we need to leave right now.
His hand is playing with her even as he’s driving them furiously home. And the minute the car stops they’re on each other, tearing their clothes off as they stumble into the house, making out but neither one wants to be the one to actually verbally give up, and it escalates until finally they both admit they’re done with this and do. the. deed. Aaaand the resultant Os are like way stronger than normal bc it’s been a bit. (And maybe the reader’s like first you’re eating me out and then you’re going to cum inside of me and you’re going to stay there until I say otherwise. but this part’s totally up to you Erin, you know what you’re doing.)
*pants* oof. happy friday 💕☄️
How can one manage to top writing something that fits your amazing ideas, comet? Like??? I still don’t feel like I do them justice!
BUT LETS GOOO—you asked for messy and it’s messy.
Also, you asked for some chest action, I’m using this gif (let’s pretend he’s not injured okay? Okay!)😏
The Bet
Steve Harrington x Reader
Warnings: Smut
“I swear, this one girl I dated kept me up for two days straight,” Eddie said, nodding enthusiastically, “We practically had sex for 48 hours. I’m amazed my dick didn’t fall off!”
You rolled your eyes, groaning, exchanging looks with your friends Nancy and Robin.
While hanging out with your group of friends—the aforementioned ladies, Eddie and your boyfriend Steve—the casual, safe topic of relationship stories somehow morphed into sex stories. At least crazy, most likely exaggerated ones from Eddie, at least.
“Dude, your dick would fall off if you were in a girl for that long,” Steve said, sipping his beer.
“Or else it would’ve just turned all pruny like your fingers and toes do when you’re in the bath too long,” Robin said, casually.
How were you friends with these people? And dating one of them, at that?
All exasperation aside, you did love your friends and your boyfriend, but the things that were said when the five of you got together tended to be on the outrageous side.
“What about you?” you asked, turning to Nancy, “Jonathan ever give you any crazy sex stories that you’d like to share?”
Jonathan—Nancy’s boyfriend, who also tended to hang out with the group—had had to work and couldn’t make it today. You’re sure he’d be relieved to know the things he missed hearing. You actually envied him for a bit after the wild stories Eddie had spewed.
“Not unless you count wanting me to lick maple syrup off his-”
“More than I needed to know!” you hollered, waving your hands in front of your face.
“Y/N won’t be able to look him in the eye for a month now,” Steve chuckled.
“You asked,” Nancy smirked.
“Did I mention this one girl I hooked up with that came prepared?” Eddie smirked, downing the rest of his beer, “I’m talking she had fucking bows on her nipples and had my name written on her ass.”
Steve hooted with laughter and you gaped at Eddie. Honestly, you wouldn’t doubt that these stories were true as he was willing to try almost anything in bed, at least once—his words, not yours.
“To think, I could’ve gone my entire life without having heard that story,” Robin sighed wistfully.
“I don’t hear any wild stories coming from your direction, Y/N,” Nancy raised an amused brow.
“Oh no, I am not starting on that topic,” you said adamantly, shaking your head.
“What? We have plenty of great stories!” Steve huffed.
“I didn’t say we didn’t,” you grinned.
“C’mon,” Eddie urged, sitting forward with his arms on his knees, “Dish the dirt on Harrington. I wanna hear.”
You grinned slyly, knowing Steve had no idea what was about to hit him.
“Well, to begin with, I think he’s part bunny.”
Steve blinked, clearly not expecting that kind of comment. The others, sensing your train of thought wore identical amused expressions.
“You think that one girl you dated was bad?” you nodded to Eddie, referring to the story from earlier, “He’d go for 48 hours too if I’d let him. He’s like the damn Energizer Bunny.”
Robin and Nancy were full on losing it now and Eddie was trying hard to fight the laughter that was making his lips twitch.
“He’s insatiable, I swear. If you introduced him to rabbits, I’m sure they’d look at him in amazement.”
That sent Nancy and Robin into another fit of laughter while Steve sat, mouth opening and closing like he didn’t know what to say. Eddie’s amusement shone in his eyes as he glanced at Steve.
“Don’t break her now, you hear?” Eddie laughed.
Steve’s cheeks were a light shade of pink that made you giggle.
“I can’t help it that I happen to love sex with Y/N. So sue me,” he mumbled, a small grin on his lips.
“I didn’t say I was complaining, I’m just stating facts,” you smiled, pecking his rosy tinted cheek sweetly.
“Energizer Bunny!” Robin sputtered out, launching the two girls into another round of stomach holding laughter.
“She’s never gonna let me live that one down,” Steve sighed, glancing sideways at you.
“Aw babe, but you’re my Energizer Bunny,” you smirked, poking his cheek.
He responded with an eye roll and draped an arm around your shoulders, pulling you into his side.
Robin and Nancy had calmed down by now, but there were actual tears streaming down Robin’s face from laughing so hard. When she could finally speak properly, she directed her comment at you.
“Sounds like a good problem to have.”
“Don’t get me wrong. I love our sex life,” you said, motioning between you and Steve, “But I could go a lot longer than he could without sex.”
“Hey, that’s not true!” Steve exclaimed as you turned in his arm, amused.
He pulled his arm back, something sparking in his eyes. Maybe intrigue.
“Please I could hold out longer than you,” he challenged.
“Don’t kid yourself babe,” you patted his arm mockingly, “We both know I could last longer.”
“You want a bet?”
Oh, that was intrigue and challenge in his eyes.
“Anyone want to make a side bet on these two?” Eddie joked.
You ignored him.
“What’s the terms?” you narrowed your eyes, up for the challenge.
“Whoever can go the longest without sex, wins,” Steve stated, plainly.
“Wins what?” you asked.
“Whatever the other wants,” he shrugged, “I’ll let you know when I win.”
“Pft. You’re on.”
You shook on it and watched your three friends exchange an array of amused glances. But it was Eddie that voiced what they were all certainly thinking.
“They’re not gonna last a day.”
•
Oh, the bet was still going on, even 24 hours later.
You were actually impressed that Steve hadn’t caved by now. But he kept surprising you.
You both had been up for the challenge, but that didn’t mean it didn’t come with a bit of teasing from both sides. It started out seemingly innocent with gentle, lingering touches.
Steve’s hand gently stroking your waist, your hand lingering on his chest a moment longer than necessary. Your hand casually finding his thigh at a random moment, his fingers caressing your own thigh, in rebellion.
Neither one of you caved.
So, the teasing continued, just amped up a bit.
Your eyes narrowed when by day three, he walked out of the bathroom, towel loosely wrapped around his waist, beads of water falling from his damp hair, down his chest. Obviously, this was a sight you saw every day, but today, you could smell its nefarious motives.
Was it just you or was his towel dangerously loose?
“This isn’t going to work, you know,” you grumbled, crossing your arms.
“What? Me getting dressed?”
He mocked confusion, looking at you with creased brows, right at the moment he dropped the towel.
Your eyes immediately went south. Even when he wasn’t hard, your body reacted to him. Your mouth went dry at the sight of his fully naked body in front of you.
“Oops, sorry. Towel must’ve slipped,” he shrugged nonchalantly as he bent to pick it up, wrapping it back around his waist before walking to the closet.
Your eyes followed his every movement, the sight still fresh in your mind. But he was not going to win with that cute trick.
“Nice try, Steve, but I’m not giving in first.”
He glanced over his shoulder as he pulled on his boxers, then the pair of pants he’d selected for the day, blinking innocently.
“I have no idea what you’re talking about, babe.”
He wasn’t going to get by with that little stunt though; you still had plenty of tricks up your own sleeve.
•
“Babe! I’m home!” you heard Steve call, later that afternoon, his shift at Family Video over.
“In the bedroom!” you called, smirking to yourself as you set up the scene.
You were in a sage green satin nightgown that barely covered your underwear. Its two spaghetti straps were thin and almost invisible on your shoulders, the neckline low and revealing enough cleavage to be sexy. At the center, where the cups of the top met was a bow, the same sage as the rest of the nightgown. The trim of it, that barely reached the tops of your thighs was lacy and delicate.
You had your leg up on the bed and you pumped a bit of lotion into your hands before bending over and beginning to rub it into your skin. You made sure the curtain of your hair hid your smirk as you heard Steve’s steps approach.
“Man, it was a long day. Robin made me-”
You heard him stop, figuratively and literally, in the doorway, you finally in his sight.
You looked up, the picture of innocence and smiled at him.
“Oh hey, honey. Tough day at work, you said?”
Now it was his turn to look suspicious.
“What’re you doing?” he asked, eyes glued to you.
“Just getting ready for bed,” you shrugged, switching legs and beginning to rub lotion into the opposite one.
“It’s 4 pm, Y/N.”
“Oh? Is it? Well I thought I’d jump into the shower before you got home and get comfy before I started dinner.”
You felt his gaze rake over you, starting at your legs and gliding upwards. You heard him mumble obscenities under his breath as he stomped to the bathroom.
Next thing you knew, you heard the shower running. You burst out laughing, imagining Steve shivering in a cold shower, too stubborn to lose the bet.
Now, you were even.
•
Steve’s retaliation came quickly, though.
You’d stayed in your nightgown, but had thrown a white silk robe over it after you’d gotten too chilly parading around half naked.
Dinner had been uneventful, but pleasant, just spending time with one another while enjoying your smoked salmon, twice baked potatoes and rosemary honey roasted vegetables. After you’d rinsed the dishes and put them in the dishwasher to run later, you’d joined Steve on the couch with your book.
He was currently sucked into some show on TV, so you curled up next to him, content to just get some reading done. At some point, you’d ended up with your head on his chest and one of his arms wrapped around you, him still engrossed in TV and you, in your book.
It wasn’t unusual for you to feel his absentminded touches, even when his full attention wasn’t on you. But you definitely didn’t miss it this time when you felt his thumb stroking the side of your boob. Your eyes halted on the sentence you’d been on as you glanced toward his hand.
Deciding to try and ignore it, you attempted to return to your fictional world. It got more difficult to concentrate though as his stroking fingers got closer and soon you felt his index finger running circles around your nipple, without actually touching it.
You couldn’t help your body’s instant reaction. The way his touch sent little bursts of electricity through your body, straight for your core where your traitorous clit started throbbing. You had to bite back a moan when you felt the tip of his finger flick your nipple through the thin material of your nightgown.
You felt it harden under his touch, betraying your arousal. But just because your body was giving you away, didn’t mean you were going to give in. You knew Steve well enough to know that he knew exactly what he was doing right now.
“Steve,” you said, trying to keep your voice from wavering.
“Hmm?” he answered, maintaining his distracted demeanor.
“Stop that.”
“Stop what?” he asked, purposely pinching your nipple lightly between his fingertips.
You inhaled sharply before swatting his hand away.
“That,” you indicated, pointing to his hand.
His smirk grew as you sat up, his eyes falling to your chest where you knew, good and well, he could see your nipples peaked through the satin of the nightgown.
“Ready to give up yet?” he asked, eyes glimmering, brow raised.
“Not a chance,” you said, crossing your arms over your chest to hide the betrayal of your body.
Even though every fiber of your being screamed in desire for him, your brain would not let you give in.
“I still have plenty more endurance than you do, Steve,” you huffed.
You grabbed your book, situating yourself at the other end of the couch, far away from his tempting touch. He just gave a delighted laugh at your reaction, watching you.
“We’ll see, baby. We’ll see.”
•
You were getting the asshole back for sure.
So far, the score was now Steve: 3, You: 1. In a double sneak attack this morning, he’d attempted to break you again. It didn’t work, but man, it had taken a bit more self control.
It was another usual morning, you awake early to see Steve off for his early shift at Family Video. You sat in bed, sipping your cup of coffee and curled up in the covers, back against the headboard.
Usually you just chatted with him while he got ready, read or even halfway paid attention to something on the TV in the bedroom. This morning, he’d made sure your eyes were on him.
Although he’d already pulled the little towel stunt, it didn’t escape your attention how by the time he’d exited the bathroom, he’d already pulled on boxers. Even more baffling was when he went straight to the dresser mirror, preparing to do his hair. Something he never did until after his clothes were on. Heaven forbid one piece of hair would fall out of place whilst pulling on a shirt.
But today, as he ran his fingers through his still damp hair, tousling the strands, your eyes stayed glued to him. Especially the way the muscles in his back rippled since you knew just how they felt under your fingertips when he was on top of you, thrusting hard into you. Your eyes roamed the constellation of freckles and moles over his skin, ones that you may have licked a path over, once or twice before, driving him wild.
It got even worse when his Farrah Fawcett spray came out. His arms were raised, one hand manipulating his hair to swoop to one side while the other sprayed the hairspray onto his locks. But your eyes zeroed in on his toned biceps and you had to mentally stop yourself from drooling. The amount of times those strong arms had held you down or against a wall, the way your fingers had gripped them while he made you feel such glorious sensations.
You had to mumble an excuse about getting more coffee before you did something stupid like jump him right then and there. As you clambered out of bed, the fact that your coffee mug was still three-fourths of the way full wasn’t lost on you.
You swore you heard him snickering as you’d sprinted out of the room.
Steve wasn’t above getting dirty, so that meant you wouldn’t be either. It was time to get a bit more creative and bring on the heat.
Which is why you thought a little surprise visit to Family Video for lunch was much needed.
“Hey Y/N!” Robin called, face brightening when she saw you walk in, “This is a pleasant surprise.”
“Thought I’d bring you and Steve some lunch in case you haven’t eaten already,” you said, holding up two brown bags, “Turkey, double Pepper-Jack cheese with jalapeños like always?”
“You are the best,” she beamed, snatching her special made sandwich that she’d always request from you.
“As long as it’s you with the heartburn, not me,” you chuckled, “Where’s Steve?”
“In the back, sorting the new inventory. Want me to go get him?” she asked.
“No, that’s okay. I can take his sandwich to him.”
Robin had already pulled out her sandwich and taken a bite before you’d even moved. She spoke before you had a chance to leave though.
“So, how’s that bet going? Is it still going on?” she smirked.
“Oh, it sure is. I’m not planning on losing.”
She eyed you suspiciously.
“This isn’t just a typical lunch visit and a sandwich, is it?”
“You know me well,” you grinned, deviously.
“Poor Steve,” she sighed dramatically, “He doesn’t stand a chance.”
“You’re damn right,” you snickered as you headed to the back.
You found Steve unloading a box of new rental tapes, shelving them.
“Hey, you. I brought you lunch.”
He turned, smiling at you.
“Thank God. I swear Robin could hear my stomach growling from out front,” Steve laughed, taking his paper bag, pulling you into a quick kiss.
“How’s it going?” you asked, leaning in the doorway.
“The usual,” he said.
“Sit down and take a minute to eat, I can put these away if you want me to,” you offered.
He nodded, pointing to the shelf where he’d been putting the tapes.
You grabbed a pile, putting them up as you both chatted during his lunch break. When it was about over, you picked up one tape, purposely knowing it was too high for you to put away.
You stood on tip toes, making sure you were positioned so Steve could see your shirt ride up, exposing just a sliver of your back as you attempted to place the VHS on the shelf.
“Here, I got it.”
You didn’t miss the gruffness of his voice, making you fully aware that he’d noticed the flash of exposed skin. But you weren’t nearly through yet.
He took the tape, reaching over you to place it in its proper spot. You thanked him, turning around to face him.
“Hey Steve, do you know what I would be saying if I let you take me right now? Here against the wall in the back room?” your voice had dropped to a whisper, a finger running down the center of his chest.
His eyes were lidded as he looked down at you, throat bobbing as he swallowed.
“What?” he whispered roughly.
You bit your lip, looking up at him through your lashes before you leaned closer to him, voice so low that even anyone nearby wouldn’t have been able to hear you.
“I’d say: Hurry, Steve. I need to cum.”
You definitely didn’t miss the rumble of his groan from deep within his chest nor the arousal that had quickly formed a problem in his pants. You pulled away smugly, kissing his cheek and letting him know you’d see him later.
“That’s definitely cheating!” he hollered after you.
Robin practically choked on her sandwich, having no idea what exactly you’d done, but amused by it all the same. You chuckled at her comment as you left Family Video.
“I swear, this is better than television.”
•
It had been an entire week. You were amazed this little bet had lasted so long, but a part of you was having fun.
You were coming up with new ways to tease Steve and he providing new ways to torment you. Honestly, you’d expected him to cave a lot earlier, but he was still going strong. Although, strong might be stretching it.
You were both weakening, little by little, but you weren’t done messing with each other. The teasing didn’t ease up any, even around your friends. Just last night, when you’d had dinner out with the usual group of friends, the games continued between you two.
Since you were a rather larger group, you and your friends typically took up two tables towards the back of the diner, giving some semblance of privacy to the noisy crowd. Although there were plenty of chairs, you’d opted to sit in Steve’s lap after everyone ate and some were enjoying milkshakes for dessert, you being one of them.
You shifted purposely in his lap as if trying to get comfortable, even though you already had been. You knew it was pure torture for him to feel your ass rubbing against his crotch and you felt his hardening cock beneath you only moments later. You hid your smirk as you dipped your head to take another sip of your milkshake.
His arm was around your waist, but he pulled you close to murmur in your ear. It was already loud in the diner, your crew adding to the loud volume, so there was no danger in anyone overhearing his words. But, he knew what he was doing, whispering huskily in your ear.
“Keep doing that and I’m gonna end up cumming in my pants.”
You turned to him, smile sweet as sugar.
“Well at least you’ll release some of that tension, hm?”
You didn’t miss the glare he gave you, or the desire that blew his pupils wide. He hadn’t given in yet, but you were going to make sure he would, soon.
He didn’t let you off easily, either. In the dark parking lot, when everyone was saying their goodbyes and hanging around to chat a little bit more, Steve pulled you close.
In the darkness of the night, none of your friends saw what he was truly doing other than what appeared to be leaning down and kissing your cheek.
Instead, he licked the outer shell of your ear, teeth sinking gently into your earlobe as he pressed his hard erection into your ass, grinding it against you.
“See what you do to me baby? If I could, I’d strip you naked right now and take you against the hood of my car.”
His whispered words sent a rush of heat between your thighs and you held back a groan. The more you’d teased one another, the hornier you’d gotten. A part of you really wanted to tell him to fuck it and fuck you.
He took your silence and your gaping jaw as proof enough that he’d won this round.
Touché Steve, touché.
•
The ball was in your court now and as desperate as you were, as wound tight as you’d gotten, your stubbornness wouldn’t allow you to give in—not yet.
You were horny as fuck for Steve by now, but the only rational thought you had was to make him give in, that way you could end up having sex anyway.
Your next trick involved a simple ice cream cone. Seeming innocuous enough, you didn’t miss how his eyes trailed your tongue and mouth as you licked it seductively in front of him, putting on a damn good show.
You made it as convincing as possible, pretending it was his dick you were licking and sucking, torturing him as much as this little exercise was. When he stood from the kitchen table to announce he was going for a run, you looked at him, amused.
“You don’t run,” you said.
“Yeah, well I’m taking it up now,” he grumbled as slammed the door behind him, off to rid himself of the sexual tension he was clearly feeling.
How he was managing to hold out so long was beyond you, but you still had a few last things to try before you admitted defeat and jumped his bones.
•
It was just passing comments you made, but you saw how it got him going and in turn, that aroused you. It had become a sick game between you two—although it really wasn’t harming anyone, it certainly amped up the desire.
It seemed it had morphed from who could go the longest without—although that was still the ultimate goal—into who could make the other the most desperate.
“What do you think?” you asked nonchalantly, as you stirred pasta sauce at the stove, “Is the table sturdy enough for you to bend me over it?”
Nancy and Robin were coming over later to have a girls’ night of pasta and rom-coms. Steve, who had to be up early for work the next day was planning on going to bed early and leaving the three of you to your night together. That didn’t stop you from throwing in a few teasing remarks for his sake while you prepared the food, though.
“You wanna know what I think?”
You heard the table chair scrape back, indicating he had gotten up abruptly from where he was sitting, perusing the paper. You felt rough hands on your hips as he jerked you backwards into him, arms snaking around your waist.
“When you finally decide to give in and let me fuck you properly, I’m going to make you cum six ways to Sunday,” he partially growled, your body tensing and desire coursing through your veins.
“Oh?” was all you could managed, your throat raspy and chest heaving.
Your mind went wild with thoughts of him between your legs, making you ache for him so badly. You were so damn close to giving in and he knew it.
“Sweetheart, that’s a promise.”
-
It was later when you, Nancy and Robin were settled with identical plates of pasta, preparing to start the first movie that you heard Steve call your name from the bedroom.
“Sorry, I thought he was asleep already,” you apologized to the two, “He probably just can’t find the new tube of toothpaste or something.”
You rolled your eyes endearingly , telling them you’d be right back as you set your plate on the coffee table, getting up to head to the bedroom. You were confused when you saw him sitting on his side of the bed at the edge, flipping through channels on the TV.
“You need something?” you asked, brows furrowed in confusion.
“Yeah. C’mere,” he motioned with his hand.
When you were in reaching distance, he pulled you close by your waist, pulling you down to him, kissing you hard. His hands slid to your ass, gripping it as he kissed you passionately.
His mouth moved quickly against yours, tongue entwining with your own, some of his pent up frustrations—yours as well—being unleashed in the kiss. Your hand had moved into his hair as you kissed him back, practically ready to crawl into his lap and grind against him while he palmed your ass and guided your hips to move against his.
But, to your surprise, he pulled away, looking completely composed and calm. You heart was beating wildly in time with your aching clit who’d had the stupid idea that you were finally getting some action. His hands left your ass as well, as if they’d never been there all while giving you a sinful smile, pearly whites showing and all.
“Now be a good girl and make sure your guests don’t get lonely, hm?” he smirked, “Have fun, baby.”
You stumbled off in a daze, wondering how the hell he had managed to not be as worked up by that single kiss as you’d been.
Little did you know, he had been.
Soon enough, everything would to come to a head and all it would take would be one end of summer bash.
•
You’d both had made it to the two week mark—practically a record for you and Steve. Although, something told you when the bet was over, he wasn’t letting you leave bed for a week straight.
By now, you were strung so tight that you could rival a guitar string. Obviously, the moment you decided you wanted to give in to Steve had to be at the worst possible time. You and he were currently with all your mutual friends, so it wasn’t like you could do anything here. Though you desperately, desperately wanted to.
Joyce and Mrs. Wheeler were hosting an end of summer bash at the Wheeler’s house, in their spacious backyard. There was grilled hot dogs and hamburgers, an array of desserts and a good time with friends.
The six younger teens—Mike, Dustin, Will, Max, Lucas and El—were all there, along with Lucas’ younger sister Erica, who was an unofficial part of the group. Nancy, Jonathan, Robin and Eddie were also there, along with both Mr. and Mrs. Wheeler, Holly and Joyce and Hopper. There were way too many eyes around, but that didn’t exactly stop you from subtle teasing.
It was still warm out, being the last days of summer and you’d donned a sundress that was low cut enough to sneakily taunt your boyfriend. It’d worked on him extremely well as he couldn’t stop his eyes from falling to your chest, trying hard not to imagine freeing them from that dress and sucking and kissing them. He really didn’t need a boner in the middle of a family friendly barbecue.
Apparently, great minds thought alike because he’d purposely picked his tightest pair of Levi’s to wear today and he felt a surge of pride at his choice every time he’d caught you checking him out throughout the afternoon. You were a tough nut to crack though and had yet to give into his teasing. Though he wanted nothing more than to have his way with you, he held out, curious to see just how far this could go.
You were relentless and sneaky, still managing to rile him up, even amidst the group of friends. After his stunt last week when Nancy and Robin had been over, he probably deserved it.
“You two still have that bet going on?” Eddie asked, mouth agape.
“Yup,” you answered, taking a bite of your banana pudding.
“Wait. How long has it been?” Jonathan asked, having been filled in by Nancy.
“Too long,” Steve grumbled causing Eddie to hoot with laughter.
“Two weeks,” you responded.
Both you and Steve watched in confusion as both Eddie and Jonathan pulled out their wallets, each grabbing five dollars, passing it to Robin.
“What’s this?” you asked, motioning to the money being passed over.
“Robin bet us five bucks each that you’d last more than a week,” Eddie shrugged.
“You had a side bet on us?” Steve asked, appalled.
“Sorry man. I didn’t think you’d last the first day,” Eddie smirked.
“What can I say?” Robin shrugged, “I know him well. He can be a stubborn shit when he wants to be.”
While this conversation happened, your bare foot had found its way out of your sandal and into Steve’s lap. You were thankful for the cover of the picnic table as your foot rubbed his knee and thigh, seemingly inconspicuously, until you moved ever so slightly to the left. It rubbed against the crotch of his jeans as you innocently ate your dessert. Steve almost choked though, causing you to grin behind your spoon.
You returned his glare with a bright smile, enjoying torturing him. He wasn’t going to let you get away with that, you know knew that for sure. You certainly didn’t miss the way he had to rearrange himself as discreetly as possible, when he stood to play a game of Frisbee with the younger kids.
You sat with the older teens at the picnic table and turned so your back was pressed against the table to watch the game.
“Hold that thought,” Steve said, “It’s a little hot out here don’t you think?”
You glowered in his direction as he pulled off his shirt, exposing his bare chest. He tossed his shirt towards you.
“Mind holding that for me, babe? Thanks!” he hollered, running off.
You knew exactly what he was doing and damn him if it wasn’t working. Even from the distance your eyes were locked on him. You wanted to kiss and lick every inch of exposed skin he was showing off right now, leave hickeys all over his neck and chest and around his collarbones. You wanted to play connect the dots with your tongue and the splattering of moles over his abdomen, wanted to leave scratch marks down his back.
You’d been so out of it, you didn’t even notice when the others had left to start a game of two on two volleyball.
Your fingers clutched Steve’s shirt in your hands as you watched his muscles flex and ripple with a single toss of the frisbee. Even though you always found him attractive, your thoughts had never been so dirty as they were now while you watched him.
The frisbee went flying off course, nowhere near any of the players, towards your direction.
“I got it!” Steve called to the others, jogging your way.
You bent to pick up the rogue circular toy at your feet just as he approached you, making sure he got an eyeful down the neckline of your dress. He noticed, alright.
Steve gulped, eyes taking in the curve of your breasts, almost able to see far down enough to see your nipples. He’d seen you naked plenty of times in the last two weeks, sure, but it had felt like an eternity since he got to enjoy your body. To squeeze it and kiss it and explore it like he loved to, leaving marks that only he was allowed to in secret spots, making you moan and writhe underneath him, on top of him, wherever, as he made you see stars. He always got the most satisfaction and pleasure knowing he’d pleased you well.
When you straightened, handing him the frisbee, he could’ve sworn you were giving him fuck me eyes, and he was absolutely right.
“Steve, if we don’t leave now I’m going to take you on this picnic table, right here and right now.”
Your voice was hoarse, filled with desire and fuck if it didn’t make him instantly hard.
He turned his back on you only long enough to toss the frisbee back to the kids.
“Sorry guys, I just remembered we had another engagement we also have to attend to!” he shouted to them.
“Aw come on! We were winning!” Dustin protested.
“We can rematch this weekend, okay? Gotta run!”
He didn’t even bother with byes, nor did he put on his shirt as he grabbed your hand, nearly dragging you to the car. You were so horny yourself you were contemplating doing it in his car, but you forced yourself to wait until you got home. You had a feeling once you gave in to him, you wouldn’t be through with him anytime soon—and a bed would be much more comfortable for multiple sexcapades.
He was behind the driver’s seat before you were even buckled in. As you buckled your seatbelt, your eyes caught sight of his cock straining in his pants and you almost moaned out loud. The ache in your core was so bad, you were practically sitting with your thighs clenched together permanently.
“Wait,” he grinned, turning to you, not even having turn on the car yet, “Does this mean I win the bet?”
“Drive Steve, drive!” you shouted.
You could admit it, you were that desperate. A ten minute drive home was going to take forever to you right now. Apparently, Steve had the same thought because he’d barely pulled out of the Wheeler’s driveway before his hand was between your legs. Suddenly, you were so glad you decided to wear a dress today.
His hand cupped you over your underwear and you moaned, having missed the feeling of his touch.
“Jesus, you’re soaking,” he groaned, able to feel where your arousal had soaked your panties.
“Yeah, cause you’ve been a fucking tease,” you grit out, hand clutching the door as he rubbed you through the material.
“Shit,” you moaned lowly, jaw dropping when his fingers dipped past the crotch of the undergarment, thumb rubbing at your clit.
It had been two weeks too long according to your body because it flinched and jerked at every touch Steve gave you, especially when he slid two fingers inside you effortlessly. Your hips bucked into his hand as a lewd moan fell from your lips.
He couldn’t help it, he couldn’t wait until you both got home, he had to give in to the urge to touch you and he did, taking much pleasure in your answering moans. Unfortunately, each little whine and moan was going straight to his groin where he was already painfully hard. He was quite literally driving as fast as he could.
“Damnit,” he muttered when they got caught up at a stoplight.
He tried to distract himself with you, hoping the red light would quickly turn green. This right now was fine, but he wanted to do much, much more to you.
His fingers curled within you as they pumped in and out, you becoming even more responsive. You knew he could feel your pussy clench around his fingers, the muscles fluttering as if in search of the cock it had been missing so badly.
“Yeah? You like that baby? Lemme hear how much you like it,” he cooed.
He took a moment while the stoplight was still red to lean over the console, attaching his lips to your neck. He gave it a few, sloppy, open mouthed kisses before sucking on a spot, all the while his fingers tormented you.
“Yes, Stevie, yes,” you whined.
He grinned, quite proud of himself. You hardly ever called him that, only when you were so blissed out by him that it came out in a whine. It was something that could get him harder than a rock.
When the light turned green, he gunned it, praying all the while that none of Hopper’s goonies were around to catch him speeding. He need you bad and he needed you now or else his dick might actually fall off. The way he pulled into the driveway of your and his house might’ve been humorous any other time, but you both had other important things on your minds.
Your dress was almost off even before you two stumbled into the door. His hands had been gripping your hips as he kissed your neck while you tried to hurry and unlock the door. He would’ve bunched up your dress just so he could feel your silky soft skin against his palms, but he didn’t much care for the thought of giving the neighbors a show.
The moment the front door was shut, he had you pressed up against it, mouth on yours. His kisses were hot, needy and just as eager as he was. His hands were already under your dress, pushing it up as you pulled away long enough for him to pull it over your head and drop it to the floor. You were left in just your underwear and the desperate moan that came from his throat made your clit throb harder.
His head bent to your chest as his tongue circled one nipple before he pulled it into his mouth, sucking on it. The other breast he palmed in one free hand, fingers rolling your nipple. Your moaning sigh was answer enough that you’d missed his mouth on you as you arched your chest into him.
While he busied himself with your boobs, your fingers rapidly tried to unfasten his Levi’s, grateful he didn’t even bother to put his shirt back on earlier. After all, it was just going to come back off anyways.
You’d managed to push the button free when his lips reconnected with yours, his hand tangling into your hair to move your head just the way he wanted it as he kissed the life out of you. At the unzipping sound of his zipper, you pulled back, breathless, chest heaving.
“Bedroom,” you panted.
He nodded, grabbing your hand and once again practically dragging you upstairs. He lost the jeans somewhere on the stairs for when you both made it to the bedroom, you both were left with one garment only.
He pushed you roughly on the bed, making you growl in delight as he crawled over you, leaving kisses up your body as he went. Before he could occupy your lips again, you stopped him with a hand to the chest.
“Bet’s off?” you asked.
“Bet’s off,” he nodded before he let himself be consumed by your mouth again.
This time, your hand was in his hair and you tugged it roughly as you kissed, his moans being swallowed by the kiss.
You felt his hair tickling your cheek when he broke the kiss, lips exploring down once again to your neck and collarbones. He was most likely leaving enough purplish bruises that you’d look like a connect the dot picture by morning.
“Here’s what’s gonna happen,” came your breathy demand, “First you’re gonna lick me, fuck me, then cum inside me and you’re gonna stay there until I tell you otherwise.”
He groaned at your words, mouth already traveling southwards before you’d finished your list of demands.
“Yes ma’am,” he emphasized, his eyes clouded with desire for you and you only.
You could’ve cum on the spot when his tongue made contact with your aching pussy. He licked one long, slow strip up your seam, thoroughly enjoying your uncontrollable moans. He may be to the brink of painfully hard, but he was going to be damn sure that he made you tremble with ecstasy, first.
“Holy hell, I missed your tongue,” you whimpered.
It flicked your clit teasingly before moving over it back and forth. It wasn’t going to take much of this before you’d fall apart, you knew. When his lips wrapped around your clit, sucking on it, it was game over as your toes clenched and the rapidly building pleasure in the pit of your stomach came dangerously close to erupting.
It probably took less than two minutes before you were crying out, clutching at the sheets as your orgasm crashed over you and your body flooded with warmth. It came and went too soon, not leaving you nearly satisfied as you practically tugged him back upwards to you when he was done.
“Now make me cum six ways to Sunday like you promised, Steve,” you uttered, tearing his boxers off.
If you’d had scissors nearby, you’d most likely had cut them off at this point. You were both frantic for one another and couldn’t get enough. You’d already had one orgasm because of him and it still felt like that had barely taken the edge off.
“I plan to, sweetheart,” he smirked, eyes locked on yours.
He wasted no time pushing into you and your satisfied moans mixed with his, the sensation like coming home. He fit you so perfectly, stretching you almost to the point of pain, but it was such a staggering feeling that you never got used to. It seemed to get better every time and it felt twice as good now after having yearned for this for two weeks.
“God damnit,” Steve moaned lowly, the pleasure etched in his features.
He hadn’t even moved yet as he was so overcome by your tight, wet, heat. He had to control himself to keep from blowing his load right then because he wanted this to last as long as possible.
“Oh my god baby,” he groaned after his first thrust, “I’m never making a bet with you again.”
Your laughter was choked, tinged with a low moan. The way you two were acting, one would’ve thought it’d been two years since you’d enjoyed each other. But there was definitely a reason for the animalistic desire, it was worth missing.
His hips picked up speed until there was nothing but the sounds of your slapping bodies and mingled noises of pleasure. He lifted one of your legs higher on his waist, allowing for a deeper angle and access to the sweet spot that made your toes curl.
“Steve, yes, yes, yes,” you mewled.
He bent, capturing your lips in a kiss that was desperate and rough as your bodies worked their way to their impending climaxes. Your breath caught mid moan when he bit down on your bottom lip, giving it a gentle tug as he pulled away from you, before releasing it from between his teeth.
“You gonna cum for me?” he rasped, “Scream my name for me?”
You nodded, eyes screwed shut as he continued to pound into you like there was no tomorrow. He was repeatedly hitting the spongy, sensitive spot deep within you that was liable to send you careening over the edge at any moment.
His hand splayed over your abdomen, thumb just in reach of your clit as he rubbed it in sync with his thrusts. He could feel you clenching down on him, the death grip your pussy had on him making his spine tingle and signaling he wasn’t going to be far off from losing control.
“Oh fuck, Steve!” you cried, completely losing yourself to your high.
Steve bit his lip, holding off for long enough to watch you. It was the most erotic sight to him to see you fall apart, your brows slightly pulled together, the pleasure so good it was borderline painful. Your mouth agape as you moaned his name, your cheeks flushed and lips bruised and kiss swollen. He didn’t last long after his first glimpse because soon he was reaching his own end, swearing, accompanied by a moan of your name.
Only you could make him cum this hard. Especially after fourteen days of teasing, which somehow had made the sex even hotter and more intense this time.
You were spent by the time you came down from your cloud of bliss, hearing the tail end of the happy, content sighs from Steve. You pushed his messy hair off of his forehead and he gave you a tired smile, looking as fucked out as you probably did.
“Love you,” he murmured against your lips as he kissed you much softer.
It was something he always did no matter how romantic, kinky, intense or gentle the sex had been. He always had to make sure you knew he loved you.
“Love you too,” you smiled, enjoying the moments of closeness that came post sex.
You stopped him the moment you felt him move to retreat from within you.
“Nuh uh, I meant what I said about you staying inside me until I said so,” you huffed.
He was still relatively hard, both his cock and his libido eager for a round two. He knew you were all for it, as well. Besides, you wanted him buried to the hilt within you for as long as you could stand tonight because if it hadn’t been proved enough, you’d missed this dearly.
A thought suddenly occurred to Steve and his whole body shook with laughter and you gazed at him, confused.
“What?” you questioned, baffled.
“It’s kind of funny when you think about it,” he smirked, peering down at you before continuing with his thought.
“Who’s the insatiable one now?”
#steve harrington#steve harrington smut#steve harrington fic#steve harrington blurb#steve harrington x you#steve harrington x fem!reader#steve harrington x reader#stranger things#stranger things fic#stranger things blurb#stranger things smut
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What made you realize you’re aro? An idea has been planted in my head of me being aro
i feel like for me, my thing was less about *realizing* i was aro and more about *accepting* that i was aro. (also talk abt my asexuality in here bc those two parts of my identity feel very intertwined. and some gender stuff as well)
as a little kid, i didn't have any crushes. i assumed all my classmates that said they had crushes were just lying or doing some kind of social performance that i (as an undiagnosed autistic who frequently felt left out by my peers' social rules) figured i just didn't get. i figured real crushes wouldn't happen til we were teenagers or something.
when i was like 13, i was clicking around on wikipedia, and found an article about asexuality. immediately i identified myself in it (and realized that oh, it wasn't the default). my confusion about why the girls my age always talked about finding guys hot finally made sense to me. it just clicked into place.
i read up more about asexuality. i looked at the asexual tag on tumblr. i learned about aromanticism and the split attraction model.
but i wasn't ready to accept being aromantic yet. i labelled myself a heteroromantic asexual for several months, maybe even a year. the idea of never having sex wasn't scary to me. but the idea of never falling in love was *terrifying*. so i told myself i just hadn't met the right boy yet and would grow into it. (you'd think a 13 year old would figure out their romantic orientation before their sexual orientation, cuz it's normal for sexual attraction to not be fully developed yet. but i was not coming from the most logical place here)
over time, seeing aromantics online, and unlearning heteronormativity and amatonormativity, the idea of being aromantic started to feel less scary. so i *began* to accept the fact that i could be aro and that would be okay, and started calling myself aromantic.
but a part of me still didn't *want* to be aromantic.
i tried looking for alternative explanations. i questioned if i was a lesbian: i now knew i didn't want to be any boy's girlfriend, but being a girl's girlfriend was never shoved down my throat (and didn't have heteronormative gender roles baked into it) the way dating boys was and so didn't make me so viscerally uncomfortable. and something about butch lesbians really resonated with me (hello repressed gender crisis). i found girls pretty to look at, and fun to draw.
and i had this female friend that i tended to cling to (i have always had a habit of clinging stronglyvto one best friend at a time in my younger years, as a weird autism-anxiety thing). i liked being by her side, and i wanted to hold her hand. i wanted us to be in each other's lives forever. i found myself jealous when she paid more attention to her various boyfriends and girlfriends than me. (later on i realized that she actually wasn't a very good friend and treated all of her friends like free therapy or pit stops between romantic partners. very high school.)
then i realized i was trans, and came out to some close friends.
and then two separate male-aligned friends both admitted romantic feelings towards me in a very close timespan. it made me feel warm when they told me they wanted to be with me. but i told them i didn't think i reciprocated the feelings. both of them told me they'd be okay with something queerplatonic instead of romantic. but i told them i wasn't sure about that either bc commitment like that was scary to me. and i wasn't sure that if i did want a qpr if i would want it with either of them specifically.
i started to think, maybe i was biromantic. the idea of being a boy's boyfriend didn't make my skin crawl the same way the idea of being a boy's girlfriend did. i wondered if maybe the reason i didn't say yes to being in a romantic relationship was just the same reasons i also didn't say yes to being in a queerplatonic relationship (commitment issues/not being sure if either of those particular people were right for me)
but i slowly realized that all of my feelings that i was hoping to fit into a romantic box just. weren't romantic and couldn't be forced to be romantic. it was all either just strong platonic love (i remember noting that it was roughly the same type of love i'd felt towards favorite cousins, who the idea of being romantic with obviously disgusted me). or in other cases were just me being lonely and wanting to be loved and paid attention to, and wanting any love i could get even if it were romantic. and being so afraid of being abandoned in favour of everyone getting romantic partners (because our amatonormative society says that friends should always come second to romantic partners, plus that first girl friend regularly ditching me for her partners increasing that fear) so i was hoping to be in a romantic relationship with the people i loved platonically so that i wouldn't have to worry about them leaving me behind.
idk if i explained it well, and idk if any of this is helpful to you. but yeah.
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fuck yeah ok lets get into it. i tend to be irresistibly drawn towards whatever i think would get the most genuine disgust out of people i know irl, which is hard bc my friends are all also freaky transsexuals who are into edgeplay. so i got creative. this one is too involved to roleplay and probably crosses a lot of lines for a lot of people but i do love talking about it. also somewhat inspired by that movie "may december".
the concept is to find a transfem in a vulnerable position, probably newly transitioned, probably younger than me, and support her and date her and get her dependent on me and comfy with me. then i tell her im into cnc & i want her to top. once we try it out the first time i flip on her. i tell her she crossed my boundaries in a major way on purpose and that shes a rapist and a predator. once shes apologizing to me for nothing i forgive her and take her back. then it gets meaner. i initiate sex with her but stop when she gets close to orgasm. tell her i dont trust her to control herself and im too traumatized to continue. keep doing this until i get her pent up and really believing shes a monster who cant help herself. until she breaks and forces herself on me for real. of course i stopped taking birth control & didnt tell her, but pretend i did and act horrified that she came inside me. when i get pregnant i say i want to keep it and make her beg me not to, just so i can guilt her over that later. then i can blackmail her, keep her and our friends thinking shes the one abusing me, and tell her ill ruin her life if she tries to leaves me. so i can have a cute little pet for ever and ever :)
wowwwwwee you are dastardly anon. May December toxic trans masc edition. you should definitely write some fics! and tag them to hell and back. this reminds me of a lot of the forced detransition cnc kink stuff in terms of what a lightning rod it can be but also how immensely hot it can be because it is a subject that is so triggering and charged.
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From my experience, men and their female best friends always got something going on. I can't even blame the girl cuz the men be on some bullshit. The issue is that men are usually friends with women they find attractive and attracted to. Also because they view women as things for sex they tend to always have some sort of physical history with the women around them.
For example, a long time ago I had a boyfriend who had been best friends with this girl his entire life. Their parents were best friends and they grew up together, they acted like twins, that kinda shit. I was naive so I didn't think anything of them being extremely touchy with each other. However he told me in the first month of our relationship that he couldn't be physically affectionate to me because he's not that type of person. I would see him wrapped around her on our bed sleeping. He refused to hold my hand in public. But I was 22 and he was 35 and I liked him so much I let him walk all over me just so he would stay with me.
There were many signs like the fact that he would always take her side in everything, he only ever talked about her to the point where everyone who knew him including his family thought they were dating him and of course he could never say no to her but the first really bad sign was when he invited her to our ANNIVERSARY dinner where he proceeded to ignore me and focus on her and then when we were back at our apartment, we were all getting ready to watch a movie together and she casually sat on his lap. He suddenly seemed to remember that I was there, apologised and seemed genuine and he really tried to make it up to me so I let it go.
Second bad sign was when he could never remember simple things about me but always remembered everything about her. We had been dating for 5 years and he still couldn't correctly spell my last name while he spelt her European name perfectly but I guess that's what I get for dating a white man.
I’m so sorry you went through such a shitty experience!
And I won’t say anything else on this topic or answer any more asks bc I don’t want to invite a discussion on my page bc i respectfully disagree with some people. But I do agree with you, the man is a HUGE part of the problem. They 1000% only ever befriend girls they find attractive. And there’s always something there, no matter how innocuous both parties play it off. At least in my opinion.
Also lmfao at your last sentence 😭😭😂💀💀
#no one reply to this pls I’m exhausted and deleted the whole discussion off my blog#and quite honestly so much was triggering me 😂😂😂😂😂#but I’m glad the girls who get it get it 😭😭😭#and it’s okay if you disagree too 💖💖#anon
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🌻🌻🌻🌻
thank u for the excuse to ramble about celestial weddings cuz i haven’t talked about this wip much on this iteration of my blog lol
celestial weddings as a wip started when i was watching a series of documentaries in 2021… i think? or 2022 i can’t remember. but it was a series documenting different wedding traditions and rituals across the globe and that got me thinking about a story that explored a multitude of different wedding traditions being the main focus. this lead to the idea that it shouldn’t just be a bunch of random weddings but it should be a polyamorous vibe where the main character is almost in an otome game scenario except they have to marry a number of different suitors for one reason or another with MY overarching goal to make fun and interesting fantasy wedding traditions.
this developed into the character of dagmar. i don’t have any updated art of him but here’s the most recent art i have of him
and then the story started to snowball.
so, dagmar is non-binary; and along with polyamory that’s the other aspect of this wip: every character is non-binary and most of them tend to go by multiple pronouns. dagmar himself (i use him a lot bc he is inherently masculine and he is the first of his pronouns in preference) goes by he/they/she. and i think what’s interesting about this wip and about dag in general is that pronouns tend to shift in relation to the person that they’re around and the relationship they have. for instance with one of his lovers, lilliabet, dag mainly goes by he/they. however with another of his lovers vigustav (one of the only two who uses a singular set of pronouns) dag actually goes by she/her pretty exclusively. i don’t know why this is exactly but i’ll explore it more when i have more of a brain.
the reason dag is marrying all these people tho is bc he’s been chosen as a potential candidate for the celestial ruler, who p much oversees everything that goes on in the realm and throughout the 8 spheres (or realms) in this world. they all have names and the like which maybe i’ll ramble about later but we move on for now. the celestial ruler has a council of celestial lovers who help them in their decision making and ruling and it’s one person from each of the 8 spheres that they marry. marriage does not have to be inherently romantic btw but in this story and in anything about this universe i may do it will be cuz i personally like romance but it doesn’t gotta be so yknow.
anyway i love all of dag’s relationships with his partners. btw this poly circle is a one axis many spokes scenario. the other celestial lovers become friends and close like family but none of them are particularly attracted to each other in a romantic or sexual way (this does not mean orgies or group sex is off the table in any way tho yknow. ya can do what you want without attraction in pursuit of closeness and bonding etc etc i don’t feel like getting into the weeds) however there have been more complicated circles of polyships of previous celestial rulers so yeah.
ALSO i wanted all of the relationships to kind of speak to a different type of dynamic that i like tho i’m still working on the kinks of this as i learn more about the other lovers and their personalities. lillia, viggo, aenlin, and zhujen i have the best grasp of a personality and dynamic of so that leaves 4 others i gotta get to know better. but here’s a doodle of all the lovers it’s kinda old also and not entirely accurate but i need to make character and realm sheets for them LMAO. also now all the lovers have names but back then they didn’t LMAO. so going L to R top to bottom:
lilliabet (she/they) ; rhohanen (they/he) ; vigustav (he/him) ; almine (he/she) ; aenlin (he/they/she) ; zhujen (she/her) ; muu (they/she/he) ; izul (they/them)
and slightly better doodle of my faves
(vigustav, lilliabet, rhohanen, aenlin)
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Get to know the blog:
So apparently my horny posts are something worth following for so I guess I'll do a bio and about me thing that definitely won't turn into a random ADHD ramble about shit
About me
I'm Feral, 19 and I never learnt how to read ✌️
^^ I'm leaving this up because I think it's hilarious but I'm 20 now
Living in the UK but not white
demisexual as fuck, preference for women but honestly I'm more interested in how we vibe than any gender. I tend to identify most with lesbian/sapphic labels because I feel most comfortable in this community.
fuck knows my gender either, I mostly present femme atm but I just identify as *all* I'd say I'm more nb/w or nb/nb & t4t but just in love with queer people in general. I am a girl but I'm also a boy, I'm not cis. You aren't straight if you're attracted to me
Owned, completely and utterly in love, technically poly. I'd rather start off as friends and see how it goes (benefits available if we vibe)
-Dni and more under than the cut-
DNI:
I'm saying this now, I love y'all but minors please get off my page *respectfully*. This includes blank blogs without your age/ age range
Cis men-Age regressors-People who fetishise trans people, s*ssies and cross dressers-Gender/sexuality correction-terfs/homophobes etc-
Oh and PSA this fucking includes people who gatekeep LGBT labels, including but not limited to hating on butch lesbians who transition, nb&he/him lesbians. Just honestly if you aren't accepting of the ✨ENTIRE✨ LGBT+ community and how people choose to identify please leave. No buts no ifs no maybes
How to give attention:
Asks are completely okay, if you want to talk through anon regularly pick an emote and I'll be sure to tag it so they're easy to find. Flirt with me or ask questions, just keep it within my limits please.
Requests are also totally okay along with reblogs of any of my posts. They're always appreciated!
Unless we've interacted before please don't randomly DM me. Mutuals are obviously always welcome to chat, for non moots I prefer asks as I get a lot of anxiety
I tend to check out profiles that reblog/follow so if you want to be moots then that's the way to go
I can't believe I have to say this, but if you're only messaging me to sext or roleplay or whatever you call it you can leave. It makes me uncomfortable, and will most likely make me feel weird about talking to you again in the future. I'm happy to flirt but unless we've talked about it nothing more.
Safe words and talks about boundaries and limits are non negotiable in kink. If you're not respectful of that you're not a dom, if you don't have complete understanding of how this works and expect to engage in anything sexual with someone without doing proper preparation you're practicing unsafe and frankly dangerous kink. Kink is something serious and you need to know what you're doing
I'm demisexual, with a partner and require actual communication before I engage in anything other than flirting. If you're literally only talking to me bc I'm hot or for sex n stuff you're going to be disappointed
I also have a shit tonne of anxiety, so I will disappear if something makes me feel unsafe. If I don't reply, don't make it worse by getting upset. I'm sorry but I really just don't have the energy to deal with things, especially when we don't really vibe.
About ✨whore✨me:
I'm a sub mostly, total bottom and complete mess irl. thought I was ace until this year and basically innocent af (I mean significantly less as of v recently but still fairly shy). Also kinda a hermit so I'm very touch starved.
Short long summary of my kinks.. To be continued..
- Praise and nicknames, specifically cute ones that start with "my"
- Exhibitionism Mostly being uh, fucked in front of people and stuff
- hands and fingersJust god, everything to do with them. In my mouth? Yes, Pulling my hair? Yesss, choking me?? Yesssssssss, hurting tf out of me?? Please
- being manhandled, strength, just be stronger than me and throw me around pls&ty
- being a simp for me and letting me get away with pretty much anything?? Yes
- being controlled and posessiveness Like a lot, like probably more than a healthy amount
- being teased, constantly
- marks.. Just fucking marks feeling owned and having proof of it with collars and stuff
- and also pain, pain and more pain all the hard kinks
- voices, dirty talk, the way they beg, and moan, and call me a good girl, the way their voice drops when they tease me. Everything about voices
- corruption.. 👀 😤
- being free use, letting friends fuuck me, being a whore for everyone. Them sharing my nudes with their friends, them letting their friends fuck me? Yes please
- affectionate domination / soft doms but rough sex
- most of this is just the long way of saying I have a massive kink for my pretty ass girlfriend though.. Just everything about them.. Mostly their hands, and their voice and uh.. Yeah just them
Limits:
-degradation, any way shape or form,I'll most definitely cry. Acting like you don't like me, hurt me because you love me not because you think I'm worthless
- pet play, Ddlg and that kind of vibe aren't for me
- I don't quite know how to explain it but the strict af, black suit and tie, academy / high protocol/training style/straight people bdsm. It's just way too nonpersonal for me and not fun. I prefer messing around and stuff plus my gf looks way better in a skirt
- discipline, punishments and other things that make me think you hate me (see: I'm a big ass baby and sensitive af)
- refering to my uhh *anatomy* just uh it gives me dysphoria like a lot so please don't
- body fluid shit, incest, feet, tickling, hypnosis
- other things that I'm not perticularly comfortable talking about here, you don't need to know unless we're talking
Tags I use:
Yes I'm insanely bad at tagging things, yes I'm trying, no it's not working. If I forget to, just get mad at me in asks or something. I'm sorry ADHD just kind of does that
#feral asks - all asks that I've answered
#feral music - music recommendations because I have a god complex about music
#feral in love - direct posts about my gf/wife/partner/Dom/love of my life
#feral tmi - random personal shit about myself and figuring out my body
#feral reblogs - stuff I reblog, I have a separate account where I keep most of my reblogs but sometimes I can't help it
#needy feral - me begging for attention on Tumblr
#feral exposed - photos of me
#tw feral - depressing shit, mute the tag if you don't want to see that shit
#dark feral - hard kink shit, mute if you'd rather not see it
#feral complaints - shit that bothers me
#feral blogs - thoughts, updates and questions for you all about the blog
#nsft#About me#get to know the blogger#get to know me#rambles#im in looooove#i don't know how to tag this#needy feral#feral tmi#feral asks#feral in love#feral music#feral complaints#dark feral#tw feral#feral exposed#feral blogs
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20 Questions
got tagged by @artemis-devotee. seemed like fun! ty botan!
1. How many works do you have on AO3?
i have 11 works and i can tell you four of those are poetry.
2. What’s your total AO3 words count?
17,831
3. What fandoms do you write for?
on ao3? used to write for the ch**tiverse, still write for Victoria Goddard's Nine Worlds. well, okay im on hiatus from participating in fan stuff bc i got too much going on and i have complicated feelings abt fandom. but. on ffnet? naruto, inuyasha, bleach, fairy tail, danny phantom. i think.
4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?
we have time (love this one - much needed natural hair content in that fandom, much needed)
you can't even see how much you're mine (i'm really proud of this one)
before we have time
just for now
gazing at the sun
5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?
i respond to everyone's comments if i can remember LOL
6. What’s the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?
you can't even see how much you're mine. really exorcised my polyamory baggage with that one LMAO
7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?
mmmmm none of them end poorly but they end heavily, if that makes sense? but also they don't. like most of my fanfiction as an adult in my 30s is discussion of wants and needs in a relationship and hashing out things that need to be talked abt
8. Do you get hate on fics?
i have on ffnet when i was a teen and giving every naruto character in my biopunk fanfic like 4 codenames SDKVDFLVMS
9. Do you write smut? If so what kind?
yuh. "just for now" is smut (old man yaoi). and there's another i think. i wanted to really confront my sex repulsion and explore my own boundaries around what i write.
10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written?
naur i never understood crossovers v well. i love an AU tho
11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?
probably not. on ffnet it was SO goth edgelord and now it's extremely poetic prose. (and when i say POETIC prose i mean it tend to be concise and abstract, not that its purple) who wants that LOL
12. Have you ever had a fic translated?
naur
13. Have you ever cowritten a fic before?
yes! my first fanfiction was with my childhood friend Sunshine and we posted a double-self-insert absolute MANIC fanfic set in the world of Inuyasha posted to ffnet. one of my fondest memories. i dictated, she wrote.
14. What’s your all-time favourite ship?
i don't have one these days but i shant say what it used to be only that it made me insane from the time i was 14 to the age of 25.
15. What’s a WIP you want to finish, but doubt you ever will?
i had an old man yaoi urban fantasy au wherein a character who used to be the chosen one had been imprisoned and was surviving the trauma of that as a music teacher and i read a ton of prison literature for it and watched documentaries and watched interviews and spent WEEKS researching trauma from incarceration and what it means to be incarcerated (part of this was because my birth father was about to be incarcerated and i was trying to write through my understanding of what he'd be going through) and researching what town councils do. and then a (now former) friend had torn apart the fic paragraph by paragraph during beta and wrote how boring parts were and no one wanted to hear abt me talking abt poetry in the fanfic and it was my FIRST fanfic since i was in my early twenties and i basically deleted the whole thing out of embarrassment and hurt. iykyk who it was. idk if i can ever go back to that. i just don't. i want to but. even strangers in workshops aren't that cruel LOL
16. What are your writing strengths?
i'm a pretty/poetic writer good at relationship shit i think. i'm good at grounding the reader in a sense of place and my writing is very tactile. it's embodied.
17. What are your writing weaknesses?
i am a pretty/poetic writer
18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic?
i know some spanish and a little french and even less russian (i'm like learning that one through osmosis) but it's not v applicable. hmmmm i wouldn't try unless i was fluent.
19. First fandom you wrote for?
inuyasha
20. Favourite fic you’ve ever written?
either the naruto biopunk fanfiction on ffnet (i turned that one into a fanfic from a biopunk short story i had written in high school it's v close to my heart even if edgy) or "you can't even see how much you're mine" bc i put a lot into that or "we have time" because your partner doing your natural hair IS a love language.
if yall wanna hop in i'm tagging @toopunkrockforshul @cadencekismet @markeyverse
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hey aliceee babyyy!
first things first, let me congrats you on achieving your 2k followers! as a fan and a friend, I'm genuinely proud of your accomplishment! my girl, all of your posts are top-tier content and you deserve each one of your followers!! 💞🖤
now, let me introduce myself for your match-up:
starting with my appearance, I have mid-long wavy hair that is naturally red, greenish-brown eyes, freckles, birthmarks, and (unfortunately) some s/h scars throughout my body. my height is something around 5'1 and 5'2 (1m58/1m60) and my body is an average hourglass. my style is dark academia, and I appreciate adding a lot of its aspects to my daily life.
my mbti type is intj, my enneagram is 5w4 (like yours) and I'm that typical introverted girl who loves staying inside surrounded by her books and blankets. I'm a calm and patient person (not that much) and my friends usually describe me as someone intelligent and considerate. and well, regardless of being soft and affectionate, I hate clinginess. like, I definitely can deal with clingy friends or s/o's, but I tend to go to the ones who understand my desire for personal space and whose love language isn't physical touch, but quality time.
however, I don't have that many friends, and, since I'm a quiet and cold person (mainly with strangers), people end up thinking of me as someone arrogant and go away. I'm also annoyingly ironic, especially during arguments. (and I'm kinda manipulative too, but we don't take about it 🤫).
talking about my hobbies, they are playing the piano/accordion, drawing, painting, reading and playing games like cards and chess. I love sunny days, classical music, tea, vintage stuff, and studying things like history, philosophy, and society itself. but I also hate crowded places, loud noises, and cold weather.
that's all, I guess.
desired fandom: BSD
NSFW? of course-
꧁♥ ᴍᴀᴛᴄʜᴍᴀᴋɪɴɢ ɪɴ ᴘʀᴏɢʀᴇss… ♥꧂
i match you with . . . fyodor dostoevsky!
ok ok, i'm not just doing that bc u are a super mega simp for him!! it genuinely MAKES SENSE. i also had poe in mind, but the whole thing about hating clinginess and being a tad bit manipulative (me too girl) made me change it. anyway, shall we begin?
Relationship:
first of all, can i just say what an aesthetic couple you two are??
while fyodor tends to move around a lot for work purposes, you both illegally own an old-victorian style house on the outskirts of yokohama where you frequently stay
since both of you prefer to stay home rather than go out often, it's there that most of your time is spent together
^doing things like playing the piano / cello together, chess & card games (where you test your near equal intelligence against the other), and listening to classical music
outings are not nonexistent, tho! on sunny days, you'll convince fyodor to join you on walks through yokohama where you'll visit antique shops or bookstores
often scholarly conversations about history, sociology, and the psychology of humans <3
you and fyodor share an office, where you often work in a comfortable silence. the two of you share the kind of relationship where simply being in the other's presence is calming, and not many words are needed
fyodor tends to neglect his personal needs in favor of working, so you make sure to bring him tea and small trays of food every now and then
arguments are VERY rare, since you both are very logical and straightforward with your words (to each other, at least). it's unlikely you would ever misunderstand due to your similarities and deep understanding
although not being the most inclined to physical affections, fyodor frequently likes to give you head pats, kisses on the cheek, and snuggle together in bed while reading (especially on cold days)
and yes, you were able to convince him to read to you a few times. his voice and accent are so lovely and v calming to fall asleep to <3
NSFW
sex is not the most often occurrence due to your busy schedules, but when it does happen, DAMN does it leave you satisfied until the next time
with you, fyodor is a very intense person in bed
he adores your figure and every part of your body. insists that you look more ethereal than the most infamous portraits of goddesses in the past <3
the significant height and size difference between the two of you is definitely something that comes into play. sensing a sliiiight size kink in the way he likes to hold you down and make you feel powerless
degrading, but praises you at the same time. things like "you're such a pretty whore for me" and "what an obedient slut you are"
sex tires him out easily due to his "weaker constitution" so one good round is probably all you'll get at one time
favors positions like mating press so he can both hold you down and get to watch all the pretty expressions on ur face. makes fun of you for it too >:((
ALWAYS doms, but it you want him in the palm of your hand just give him head and tease him <33 will darkly glare down at you whilst also shaking and struggling to maintain his composure
oh also. breathy whimpers when he's close...that's all i have to say <3
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✨ABOUT ME/LINKS/ETC✨
[AKA. The Big Long Post Ive Been Meaning To Make For Ages But Mom I Have Anxiety Okay]
Name:
Hi! I’m Conner (or Copse if you wanna go the url route) either is fine coz hey it’s just an internet name
I’m pretty much chill with any nickname, but please ask before hand just in case
If you know me irl (👀) *hits you* NO YOU DON’T
Pronouns:
he/him
Fandoms:
- Redacted ASMR/Audio
- Ghost BC
- Call of Duty
Boundaries:
I don’t tend to talk about my private life on the internet so please don’t ask - this is of course different depending on our relationship, but if we aren’t friends then just don’t be invasive - no i will not put my real name publicly, or my age, the only thing you need to know is that i’m over 18 years old
Minors DNI on my posts/nsfw stuff, otherwise you will be blocked - I can’t control what you do on the internet, but I can control and hold responsibility for who I interact with in certain spaces, also i’m an adult and it makes me uncomfortable - thanks
Don’t be a dick - seriously, I use my blog as a way to (on occasion) be vulnerable or speak my opinions on certain topics, if you don’t like that/hold the same views then we can either have an intellectual discussion in my DMs about it, or I can block you - simple as that
Anything else/Fun Facts/Etc:
DMs/Asks are always open! and i treasure every single one I get /gen
If you’re here from my AO3 then feel free to talk to me about my writing! I’m probably my own biggest fan at this point ngl
I don’t CURRENTLY do requests/commissions (tEchnically - but if it’s an idea that really clicks then…👀) but maybe I’ll open them up at some point (busy student life n all)
My favourite bands are Ghost, Subvision, Repugnant, Sex Pistols and Rammstein (there are more than that but the list was already starting to look long)
Honestly my music tastes are so Vast And Expansive that I listen to all genres so-
I’m a cat guy - I have three ._.
I’m Franco-English and bilingual (french/english duh)
✨L I N K S :✨
AO3: @copsecore
Tiktok: @redactedmarriott
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personal, sex discussed, give some indication if you read please
my friend who plays ffxiv with me sometimes on American servers has recently gotten into the world of 'pillows', which are like... a sex work adjacent practice where people will rp intimacy with you in return for ingame money. ('pillows' are nonsexual, 'courts' [courtesans] are sexual, but otherwise essentially the same practice). she paid for me to go for one, and... it has given me much to think about i guess.
it really highlighted the difference between ttrpg rp and mmo rp. bc like... the mode i tend to adopt in ttrpg is that of a writer, i guess. my character is an instrument I'm using to tell an interesting story, and the choices i make are all on the basis of like, what would make for engaging drama. it's not that my desires don't factor into it - i want to feel that I'm entertaining the other players, the stories i find interesting reflect my preoccupations and interests - but what my character wants and what i want are distinct. sometimes what i want is to see her fail in her ambitions and undergo transformation as a result, because that's juicy narratively. it's a mode that suits me well, i like telling stories, and i feel very good if i seem to be entertaining people. no surprise perhaps that I'm most comfortable in the GM's chair.
mmo rp on the other hand feels more like... my character is a thin polygonal shell over me. sure she has a particular voice and a backstory, but it's a thin allegory for my own life. I'm new to this server, so she's a curious refugee from a foreign land who doesn't know how things are done. i lost Fall, so she lost someone on the voyage. logging into the mmo is these days mostly just a way to spend time with my friend in our anime bodies, going out places together - something we can't do in real life due to distance and disability.
so after a lot of pushing from my friend i agreed to do a pillow before i went to bed. why? i guess i was feeling lonely and really wishing for some touch and intimacy irl and this seemed like the next best thing. and i was also curious. i wanted to know what this would be like. but i was very concerned with being a good client - i wanted to like... rp well, make my partner in the scene feel comfortable as well. i think i did decently.
but looking back at that afterwards, and thinking about what it would be like to do that again (courts or pillows)... it occurs to me that like, that's the only way i could think to approach it, trying to do a good job. i realised i could much more easily imagine doing the job, which is figuring out what the other person desires and giving it to them, than imagine paying someone else money to perform a scene tailored to my desires.
'what do you want?' seems like the most straightforward question. everyone else seems to be able to answer it. indeed, i looked today at the list of court players in the venue my friend now frequents - all of them provide a like, list of their feelings about and willingness to do a series of 'standard' kinks. i imagined trying to fill one out myself and had no idea what I'd put. willing to do almost anything. want to do... what?
and the thing is... this is how i tend to approach sexuality in general, i guess. if someone asks me what i want i just end up on like... uhhh please touch my back? it's been years and i feel like I've opened a series of doors when it comes to talking about sexuality and writing it in fiction and yet it seems this must fundamental thing, to directly identify and express a desire, still eludes me.
when i look at the work of talented nsfw artists, animators in particular, you can see that they have it. there is a passion evident in the lavishly detailed expression: they want to be drawing that particular thing. it feels like by contrast I'm just chasing the formal codes of the medium. breaking it down analytically so i can be told i did a good job.
what's it going to fucking take to figure this out? i feel like I've been beating my head against this problem for years and I'm no closer to the solution. it's like there's a wire missing between desire and recognition/expression/action. when i was with a__, she tried to figure out what i was into, but it was so frustratingly obtuse that she gave up long before we actually broke up. like, she'd suggest stuff, and I'd feel good about it, but maybe really all it was was that she was actually paying attention to me and making me feel wanted. but in the end... i couldn't give her a usable answer. she suggested buying me outfits and i liked that but then couldn't figure out what sort of clothes I'd actually want to wear.
what the fuck am i so afraid of?? i want to want things. it's one of the most basic qualities of animal life. i don't want to always be sitting on the safe distant throne of analytical curiosity and trying to do a good job for other people. i want my art to have desire and expression and personality. i want my life to have that.
what fucked me up this way? was it the school system? did i become so dependent on feeling like I'd passed the test and done a good job that i completely lost sight of actually like... speaking for myself?
in a previous era i tried to cultivate purity. i tried to limit my stimuli to only the ones from the right categories of person that overtly stated the right political message. now I've found a voice that's like... curatorial, analytical. now i like to know the history and context, i can relate it to other things. I'm not hung up on purity but perhaps i lost something with the like... unreasonable fannishness i used to adopt so much more readily. i express my devotion now through the long critical essay, not the fanfic. i don't pick favourites. all the same, i do at least still love fiction - the vicarious, simpler emotions of imaginary people. if something can make me feel, strongly, I'm a devotee. so i want to make fiction that evokes the same sort of strength of feeling.
i wish nobody had ever told me i was clever. i wish i could let doing the things i want take priority over doing them well. all my pictures lately are attempts to capture something of what other artists are able to express. to develop into a certain kind of person - more or less a combination of the girls from eizouken. what is it that all of this aims to express? if i master all these skills, what am i here to communicate with them? i won't know that yet i suppose - art is a tool for figuring that out.
i guess we wandered away from talking about sex. but it's all related, don't you see? at least art is supposed to be mysterious.
i suppose, despite being someone who is trying to make a living off art commissions, i find it hard to imagine commissioning someone else. i have commissioned exactly one piece of art in my life, bc a friend was doing emergency commissions. i like doing commissions - it makes me really really glad to feel like I've made a picture that fully satisfies someone's desires. in a sense drawing original works should be like making commissions for myself. but instead i worry about like... cultivating technical skills, achieving specific vibes, endlessly compare myself to other artists.
i wish i could talk to Fall about this. i think she knew what's up. but... you know.
maybe I'll put a pin in that. "making commissions for myself". maybe splitting it like that, requesting and fulfilling, will help me set desire into motion. as for sexuality... that one remains a puzzle. but i will keep trying. one day the door will open.
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