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fanfictionized · 6 years

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Help Me Help You - My Own (16/?)

Character: Bucky Barnes x Enhanced!Reader / OFC

Chapter summary: Beginning to settle in, Annabelle is living her busily scheduled life. A make-over is just the right thing to keep her on the right track.

Warnings: Little bit of flashback

Words: 2.2k

Previous Chapter // Help Me Help You - Masterlist

Sweat was running down her neck and face, collecting to drip down her chin.

Her heart was about to explode out of her chest. Everything hurt.

“Say it.” Sam yelled. “I’m an unathletic piece of shit.” “No! What the hell, Belle. The other thing!” Wanda almost doubled over with laughter at her comment and it didn’t help in holding her body up above the mattress as she started to giggle as well. “I can do this?” “Yes, you can! Exactly, now come on! Where’s that super soldier strength at?” Her arms started to give out. She let herself drop to the ground like a potato sack, her arms made out of pure jello. She wheezed with exhaustion.

“I haven’t been to the gym in a year.” She gasped out in between intakes of breath. “And despite that I did fifty push-ups what else do you want from me?”

“That’s pretty good, though… Sam?” Wanda asked, her arms crossed in front of her chest. “She just got back. Take it easy on her.”

It had been more than a week since the meeting in the conference room. The next day Tony had come up with her new schedule and she had been more than happy with that. She finally had something to do. Until she had realized that the one thing she had been looking forward to the most, fight training, could only be done until she had at least some sort of stamina and muscle mass, along with a few pounds more on her body. The second one had not been as hard, six pounds in one week, but the first had been sheer agony so far. At least one person seemed to be enjoying it.

“Oh, come on.” He mocked her as he crouched down next to her. “I know that serum is in you somewhere and I’ll get it out of you. I know that, because Steve and Buck always beat me at everything” He stood back up, squinting his eyes mischievously. “And I want to see someone else beat their asses if it can’t be me.”

“It’s not my fault you’re slow.” She panted as she rolled over, staring at him. He didn’t look amused. “You’re my one chance at getting back at them.”

She laughed and Wanda did, too.

“Alright, kiddo. I’ll let you off the hook for today.” He rolled his eyes and grabbed her hand, helping her stand back up.

“But don’t loose hope:”

“Oh, trust me. I won’t. Don’t put too much pressure on me and maybe your dream will come true, wingman.” She suppressed a grin.

“Alright, alright.” He muttered as he grabbed his towel and left the gym.

She ran a hand over her burning muscles. After just a few days of working out she could already feel the tissue growing and forming. Not only there, but everywhere else, even in places she hadn’t worked on before.

The serum was changing her body and she had realized it quickly. It was hardly unnoticeable.

The weight she had gained could’ve just as well been her newly added muscles.

“You okay?” Wanda asked her. She nodded.

“Just weird how I can already feel the change in my body.”

“Yeah, I know. It can be strange.” She sighed and lightly punched her side. “But hey. I still have to watch what I’m eating, while you’re turning back to normal in seconds. You don’t even have to work out all that much, see, your metabolism still makes you even stronger.” She laughed. “I mean, that was your fourth time working out here and I saw you pick up that fifty Kilo ball over there yesterday. With one hand.”

Annabelle let out a nervous chuckle. “I don’t know. It was pretty heavy…”

“Yes, but you still didn’t struggle with it. Not like I would without my powers.”

“Those are my powers. I think. I’m still not sure what else is different. Maybe that’s it…?”

“No, no. Can’t be.” She shook her head, head tilting to the side.

“Maybe you should run with Steve. Just to see. Maybe you can look if you run faster, too. Or maybe jump higher. Maybe your joints and bones are more robust like theirs- “

“Thanks” She interrupted her train of thought “But I think I’ll stick with you for now.”

Wanda grinned back at her. “As long as you won’t get stronger than me.”

“You know I can’t promise you that.”

“Oh, we’ll see.” She winked.

***

It was when she was on her way back to her room to take a shower when she literally ran into Bucky.

“Shit, sorry.” He steadied her with a grip of his left hand around her arm as she bumped into him while turning around a corner. She gasped as she felt the coldness of the metal on her hot skin and once again she didn’t think of it being that way, that… metal-y, looking down at her right upper arm. His gaze followed hers and he immediately let go of her as if she was scorching.

“Sorry.” He whispered, scarcely audible. He was looking down at the ground.

She shook her head, only then realizing how he could’ve interpreted her reaction and reached out for him.

“No, it’s my fault. I wasn’t looking.” She took a hold of his metal arm and he only noticed her touch as she pulled it closer, her hand around his forearm. She didn’t want him to think she was afraid of him.

They had hung out over the past couple of nights, the watching-TV-thing becoming some sort of ritual for the two of them. And even though she probably wouldn’t admit it, it had meant the world to her. She wouldn’t want him to think otherwise.

He pulled his hand back slowly, looking back up at her and giving her a weak smile. “You working out?” She nodded. “Sort of. It’s more like Sam torturing me, but whatever.” She shrugged and gave him a sideway-smirk. His own smile softened. “And how’s it going?” She took in a deep breath. “It’s good. It’s… okay. I already feel stronger.” She let out a laugh at the thought. “Sam said he’s training me so that he can have someone beating your asses.”

“Whose asses is he talking about?” “You and Steve.” She giggled, her eyes sparkling “Because you always run faster than him. And because you’re stronger than him… I don’t think he enjoys your mocking very much:” “Well.” He smirked “He should try harder then, don’t you think?” “Don’t say that! He’s letting it out on me!”

He looked her over. Her short hair in the front of her head pulled back into a bun at the back, the rest of it hanging down loosely to reach the top of her shoulders. Her face and décolleté were shining with sweat that had dried half-way on her skin. With the sports clothes she was wearing he could see how much her body had changed since when he had been carrying it out of that creepy, old warehouse. She seemed more comfortable in her skin. Fitter, altogether. Her skin had more color too, which was shown by her glowing cheeks.

“I can see that.” He tried suppressing a wider grin. She cocked her head to the side in confusion. He cleared his throat and pointed at her with his left fore finger. “Your cheeks…”

“Oh. Hah! Yeah, I forgot about that.” She chuckled and laid her own hand onto them, feeling the heat radiating off them.

To his own surprise, she grabbed the hand pointing at her and placed it against the right side of her face. Her eyes closed as she puffed a breath through her equally red lips, just as perfused with blood as her blushing cheeks.

“Jesus Christ, I’m literally burning up.” She sighed while Bucky stood there in shock, not wanting to move his fingers in case the metal plating would graze or scratch that delicate face of hers. He couldn’t feel it per se, but somehow the sudden surprise caused the heat on her face to transfer through his cold, unfeeling hand and onto his own, making his cheeks burn.

“Oh. Sorry.” She held his hand with such care before she lowered his arm and let go. “I didn’t mean to be creepy. Your hand is just so cool. Cold, I mean.” She chuckled nervously, brushing an untamed strand of hair behind her ear. She just saw his horrified gaze. Eyes not blinking and everything else also not moving. “Uhm… Bucky? Are you okay?” She asked cautiously, her brows furrowed as she tried to reach out for him once more, but his reflexes told him otherwise. “Fine.” He blurted out as he tried his best to hide his pink cheeks behind the hair falling in front of his face and avoided her touch as he rushed past her, leaving her standing all alone.

She still looked after him as he disappeared as fast as he had shown up.

She realized that perhaps touching him had been a touch too much for him.

Sighing, she turned around to march into her room, leaning her back against the door after she had closed it. Her hand went into her hair, but the bun she had made stopped her from getting her fingers through it. She ripped it out and hissed as she did not expect such force coming with it. She had to get accustomed to her newly found strength somehow.

She was frustrated. And it had everything to do with a certain Bucky Barnes.

Sure, he was a delicate personality to deal with, but so was she. She hadn’t wanted to trigger him in any way and she thought the bonding over watching TV and shared insomnia had somehow made him trust her more, but it had hurt, plain and simple, when he had looked at her like she was fucking crazy the second she touched him. Somehow there had been a certain disgusted look on his face. And she felt angry with him and herself.

Her hands felt the rough ends of her roughly cut hair. She hated the feeling. She bit her bottom lip nervously. Then she pulled off her top and tossed it aside. She grabbed a scissor from her desk and walked into the bathroom.

She stood in front of the mirror, looking at herself. From her still skinnier-than-usual form and the sweat-soaked clothes clinging to her body to her blushed cheeks and her piercing gaze. Until further up she spotted the haircut they had given her. Before it had been long and beautiful, but now? Even that they had taken from her and it made her fucking furious.

Now it was just hanging limply on top of her shoulders. No life whatsoever.

Her breathing was erratic and her lip started trembling. She didn’t want another episode of this whatever it was, black-smoke-pouring-out-of-me-until-I-can’t-fucking-see-shit-no-more? No fuckin’ thanks.

She had to calm down in another way.

She hadn’t realized she had raised the scissors and started to cut strands of her hair off until she actually saw them collecting in the sink before her.

She cut off more and more, her heart still racing, yet no longer due to frustration, but because this was the first thing she had been able to decide for herself in seven weeks. And it felt freaking amazing. Having her life in her own hands again. More or less. Until she had learned to control the last thing they had given her, but until then this was better than feeling bitter all the time because of it. This was better than a once-in-a-blue-moon good sleep. better than lemonade on a hot day. Better than his hand on your hot face…

She had watched her mother cut her own bangs for years. She hadn’t had bangs since she was a little girl, but she needed something different. She was no little girl anymore, but she could certainly steal her younger self’s looks. Had looked good back then, why shouldn’t it now?

Didn’t look so goddamn boring at least.

She divided her hair in a sort of semi-circle going from the front top of her head around to the outside of her eyebrows. She held the hair in her hand and with a deep breath and a few snips she had it off, her hair still hanging in front of her eyes. She cut just a little above her eyebrows. Not too high, but not blocking her sight as well.

She sighed, tension leaving her body altogether. She shook her fingers through it, the tiny, loose pieces of hair raining down on her nose like snowflakes.

She looked at herself in the mirror once more. Before and after. And she smiled from ear to ear as she liked what she saw.

It didn’t look boring. Her hair was still wild and not cut so straight, her waves seemed even stronger, more defined, as they were not pulled down by all that weight of long hair anymore. She shook her head from side to side just to see them swing with their new freedom, around the sides of her throat.

She nodded, content with herself again. The first time after a damn long time.

Taglist:

@humanexile

#Bucky Barnes #slow burn #bucky barnes x reader #bucky x reader #help me help you #angst #fluff #eventual smut #fanfiction #fanfic

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