#am I saying the answer was genocide and treason? fuck no
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The Jedi Order: attachment is bad and forbidden and it only leads down the path of darkness!!!
Also the Jedi Order: *literally encourages strong parental bonds between Padawan and Master that have a literal emotional bond aspect in which they can feel each other’s emotions/thoughts*
#yes I know that’s not exactly what they meant#but in practice it is#and before anyone says anything about them meaning romantic they do NOT#force sensitive children are taken at a young age specifically to avoid parental bonds#and one of Anakin’s biggest failings was how he reacted to his mother’s death#hell Obi-Wan straight up cut a dude in half when Qui-Gon was killed (yes I’m aware that ‘dude’ was a Sith)#and I’m sure many people would say Obi-Wan was one of the best Jedi in the Order (not just fighting-wise but in general)#sorry I just find it really funny and also irritating how hypocritical the Order was about everything#am I saying the answer was genocide and treason? fuck no#but Anakin wasn’t entirely wrong for feeling like the Jedi Order had a lot of issues and that most of them were unfair to begin with#star wars#jedi#I’m not by any means anti Jedi but I’m sure as hell not pro Jedi either
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Phase One: Thor
Since I was looking up my past live-blog of the novel and realising how annoying and repetitive reading through it all is because of my having structured it as a bunch of reblogs, I’ve decided to organize it all into one long-ass post instead. In case anyone else wants to read it in the future. Or in case I decide to re-read it. Because I’m hilarious. 😅
SO WITHOUT FURTHER ADO
My Hilarious Yet Wrathful Overview Of Phase One: Thor, Redux
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If your son who’s to become king requires a babysitter to not screw it all up and also the idea of him being king is stressful enough to put you into a coma, maybe, uh… reconsider doing that? Just a thought.
But you see here why Odin was so deadset on Thor becoming king, despite him being ill-suited for the role. It’s not about what’s best for Asgard; it’s about personal legacy. Thor is Odin’s mini me, and Loki is very much not. There are places within the text where Odin laments Thor “lacking his father’s wisdom” (he’s definitely inherited your humility, though, Odin!), but he hopes for Thor to grow into a “wise king” like himself. Whereas he holds no such illusions (lol, pun) that Loki will ever take after him.
now with tag commentary! #this scene is in the script and both novelizations #(though in reading this novel seems to just be a more complete version of the junior novel? #idk i'm confused because they're supposedly written by different authors but so far the text is identical) #and it drives me insane each time i read it
“Haha, I’m a warmongering piece of shit, isn’t it funny?”
I know, I know. I try to cut Asgard some slack for being such a militaristic culture because social changes happen slowly and when you live for thousands of years per generation, it makes sense that your views on things like war would be regressive. The text says Odin has ruled Asgard for tens of thousands of years (so much for taking Loki’s “give or take 5,000 years” line literally; sure, the Odinsleep would have extended Odin’s lifespan, but by that much? Idk).
Still, fuck Odin. Especially since he’ll eventually try to shame Loki for doing the same thing he’s fucking boasting about here. And on a much smaller scale too.
…is it, though?
I actually think Loki’s relationship with being the centre of attention is really interesting in its complexity and we don’t discuss it enough. I’ve said this before, but he strikes me as the sort of person who craves attention but also wouldn’t really know what to do with it if he had it. He craves it as a result of neglect, because he’s never been shown recognition or validation. This is why he seems to revel in it in Stuttgart, even in (or maybe especially in?) his brainwashed state. But he also frequently comes across as pretty introverted and has horrible self-esteem, so I think on another level, sustained, genuine attention would make him feel kind of uncomfortable. Loki seems to believe that in order to be loved or respected, he has to literally be Thor, though. And Thor has always been the centre of attention, so for Loki, attention is synonymous with respect.
I find Loki’s relationship with wanting attention especially fascinating because I too both crave and fear it. As a borderline, I need it. When no one is paying attention to me, I lose my sense of identity. I feel as though I literally cease to exist. It’s excruciatingly painful. And yet, I have no authentic sense of self; I’m just a chameleon, and the closer people get to me, the more likely it is they’ll see behind my mask. They’ll realise it’s all a show and that I’m actually no one. And then they’ll leave. I can’t help wondering if that’s how Loki feels sometimes too.
Wait, what? You mean goat. His horns are shaped like a goat’s. This is a ram:
This is a goat:
This is Loki:
Do you see now? They’re like a goat. Not a ram. Not a cow. A GOAT.
This book was written before Ragnarok was a thing, so it may be unfair to connect the two, but it still seems worth noting that it was Thor who reduced Loki to being no more than a trickster to begin with. “You could be more,” my ass. Loki’s problem has never been that he was one-dimensional; it was always that the people in his life, including Thor, refused to see any other dimensions to him. Which makes those words particularly cruel—as if they aren’t cruel enough already, what with the physical torture and all.
Always happy to have cause to point out that
Loki was on Thor clean-up duty their whole lives; he certainly was not trying to kill Thor.
People like to point to Loki’s attempted genocide of the Jötnar and attempted(-ish? lol) conquest of Earth as proof that he’s some kind of violent maniac. But in a little place I like to call reality, Loki was historically far less aggressive and bloodthirsty than his peers.
Question: why is one conqueror evil and the other is righteously entitled to ruling over the Nine Realms?
Asgardian exceptionalism FTW
I can’t even begin to imagine what would lead you to expect such a thing, Odin. 😂
Uh, ‘cause it is?? And also their planet is MELTING without it??
This is all only within the first two chapters, btw. Lmao
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—
—
“Looking for answers,” my foot.
YOU WOULD THINK SO, WOULDN’T YOU??
#i mean unless you knew heimdall #he only commits treason on days that end in y
—
—
What’d I say? Thor clean-up dutyyyyy
Just wanna remind everyone that this
is why he’s smiling during this scene
because it makes me laugh every time. 😂
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My heart breaks every time I remember that second excerpt because literally ALL OF IT happened to him when he survived falling through the wormhole. My poor boy. 😭
But also of note… Loki gets cold (and also does not like being cold). This interests me because 1) as many are aware, the prevalent headcanon that Loki has a low body temperature irritates me and 2) it possibly(?) lends weight to the theory that he may not be fully Jötun, whether by virtue of his birth or Odin’s spell.
Haha, look at this Feminist Icon™ trying to take credit for his female friend’s accomplishments! Truly inspiring.
#for some reason the ragnarok lovers have somehow decided that thor is both a feminist and lesbian icon #whatever that means 🤷♀️ #and i'm still trying very hard to figure out why #is it literally just because he *says* he respects women or whatever in that dumb rambly conversation with valkyrie?
Ooh… you were so close to getting the point, Volstagg. So close. Take your tongue off Odin’s boot for just a couple minutes longer.
Also, the author just forgot the name of the Casket. How did this book get published? 😂
JUST LOOKING FOR ANSWERS, HUH?
Because fuck Loki, amirite? He, uh… he’s a prince too, you know.
Also… Fandral, you dweeb 😂
…am I reading too much into this, or did Odin just literally forget that Loki exists?
On the other hand, the author also seemed to forget Loki existed for most of this chapter, so who knows. 🤷♀️
lmao @ Jane immediately trying to convince herself she’s too rational to be attracted to a stranger
Honestly, though, big mood.
Just your periodic reminder that Thor’s sycophantic friends KNEW Loki was right and decided to throw him under the bus anyway.
Just as I’ve always said: That was it. That was their ENTIRE rationale. That Loki *could* have done it, therefore he must have. Please tell me these people have nothing to do with Asgard’s justice system.
…lol, jk, Asgard has no justice system.
Ok, first of all, no.
Second: thank you, Fandral. You’re a self-absorbed cad, but also evidently Thor’s least stupid friend.
Thirdly, how…? First, it was, “Loki arranged all this because he’s jealous of Thor.” Now they’ve suddenly jumped all the way to, “All of Asgard is in danger.” What exactly does Sif think Loki is planning? He’s gonna, what… assassinate Odin and then sell Asgard to the Jötnar?
—
Please stop hurting me.
Just so there’s no confusion: this one sentence explains everything Loki did for the rest of the movie. It explains how a person who has been historically non-aggressive suddenly transforms into a warmonger. To prove himself a real Asgardian, like his brother and father and grandfather.
—
…why did Odin fall into the Odinsleep in two completely different scenes in this book? I’m super confused.
Also, we really need to talk about how cruel it is of Marvel to keep forcing Loki to prove his loyalty again and again and again when he’s been doing so almost literally since we met him. And by “we need to talk about it”, I mean I need to tie Kevin Feige and co. to a chair and spend a minimum of five hours lecturing them on how poorly they understand their own fucking character.
Let’s just be clear here: they’re talking about Loki. They’re saying Loki, their LEGITIMATE king, is an enemy of Asgard, based on evidence so paper-thin it’s practically invisible. Just… please, let that sink in. Take a moment to appreciate how utterly fucked up that is.
I’m sorry (not really), but Thor was so much funnier before Ragnarok.
This scene has always kind of bugged me. If Odin removed Thor’s powers, how come he can still control the weather? Confusing.
So what exactly was Thor’s plan anyway, before he realised he couldn’t lift Mjölnir? He was just gonna call on Heimdall to help him commit treason AGAIN, show up on Asgard against the expressed command of his king, and… Odin would just shrug and be like, “You got me, son! I guess I can’t keep you down. Welcome home!”?
…I mean, I guess that more or less is what happened in the end, but it’s hard to imagine it would have still gone down that way without all the stuff that happened with Loki. Idk.
#look what i'm saying is... thor is not exactly a thinking person #no one on asgard is a thinking person #except loki but he's crazy now so he's also thinking somewhat poorly lol
Cool, Thor. Now imagine feeling that way for ONE THOUSAND YEARS and develop a little fucking empathy for your brother.
But you won’t.
You’ll brush off his feelings of worthlessness as “imagined slights”. 😒
Nice that somebody knows how the royal line of succession works, I guess…
That sound you hear? Yeah, that’s just my heart breaking. NBD.
First, they mislabelled it the Casket of Eternal Winters. Now it’s the Cask of Ancient Winters. Author must have been thirsty when they wrote this. Lol
Look, not to nitpick, but this is not the recommended procedure when you see a storm that you don’t believe is of supernatural origin coming. I’m just saying. Lol
Uh… ‘cause he is?? And your pals are committing treason AGAIN, Thor, so it technically is responding to a threat to Asgard. Just FYI.
Anyways, this is an important point that doesn’t get made often enough. People want to act like Loki illegally usurped the throne somehow, but even without the deleted scene that explicitly shows Frigga passing rulership to him (a scene which is, for some reason, entirely skipped over in this book, but whatever), understand this: Loki could not have controlled the Destroyer unless he was legitimately King of Asgard. The fact that he’s able to do so is irrefutable proof that his rulership is valid.
lmao you little shit
So… here’s my issue with this scene (and with Thor as a character): He always assumes that Loki’s acting out specifically to hurt him. That Loki’s entire life and thought process revolves around Thor. He does it in this scene, he does it in The Avengers… it’s just a chronic thing with Thor. Everything is viewed through the lens of Loki inexplicably hating him.
But that’s… just not accurate. Yes, Loki harbours a lot of jealousy towards Thor. But that’s not what’s happening in this scene. Loki is not trying to kill Thor here because he wants him dead; he’s doing it because Thor (and his friends) are getting in the way of Loki completing his ultimate goal. Loki tried to solve this problem non-violently, by lying about Odin being dead. It’s Thor’s friends who all but forced his hand by going behind his back and trying to bring Thor back to Asgard against Loki’s (and Odin’s!) direct orders.
For all the humility he’s learned in the past few days, this entire speech is still really all about Thor. About assuming that Loki’s doing this for personal reasons, because he holds a grudge against Thor for some unknown reason. This is implicit in his request to “take [my life] and end this.” It never even occurs to him that his friends are traitors to the Crown and Loki, as King of Asgard, is perhaps justified in pursuing them.
It also needs to be acknowledged that Thor’s apology here is hollow, even if it’s ultimately coming from his heart, because he has no idea what he’s apologising for. “Whatever I have done to wrong you” is not an apology. An apology addresses specific hurtful actions taken and commits to not repeating those mistakes in the future. Thor cannot commit to not repeating the hurtful things he’s done, because he doesn’t know what he’s done. Despite his best intentions, what Thor is doing here is actually kind of manipulative. He’s not addressing any substantive issue between the two of them; he’s just trying to talk Loki down. And it ultimately fails not because Loki doesn’t care or because he wants Thor dead, but because it doesn’t actually change anything.
Finally and only semi-relatedly, we should maybe at some point talk about the fact that Loki, who is stated to be a master tactician, has displayed a weird pattern of hardly ever being as lethal as he could be. He freezes Heimdall in place instead of killing him outright; he backhands Thor with the Destroyer instead of incinerating him; he, well… *gestures vaguely at almost the entirety of the first Avengers movie* Anytime the violence is even a little bit personal, he seems to hedge. Odd behaviour for somebody who’s supposedly super evil.
I’m sorry, I know I’ve pointed it out at least a hundred times before, but I just can’t encounter this scene in any form without taking a moment to appreciate how underrated and hilarious it is.
I also genuinely wonder how many Ragnarok stans who have accused me of having no sense of humour, have failed to laugh at moments like this one. Kinda feel like if you need to have the comedy spoonfed to you in the form of ass jokes, maybe you’re the one whose sense of humour is lacking. 🤷♀️
Let’s be super clear: this is not what happened. Loki did not betray Odin; he was betrayed by Odin. He did not open Asgard to its enemies; he attempted, misguidedly, to destroy Asgard’s enemies. And he most certainly did not commit suicide out of a sense of guilt.
I’m not saying Loki did nothing wrong, nor am I saying he feels no regret for the lives he has taken. What I’m saying is there’s no indication that he believes he betrayed Odin or Asgard in the process. Which makes perfect sense, because he didn’t. Everything he tried to do was for Odin and Asgard. It was misguided and horrible, yes, but it can hardly be classified as a betrayal.
The insurmountable burden on Loki is not that he did terrible things, but that no matter what he does or how hard he tries, Odin will never look at him with anything but contempt. Consider once more these passages from the very beginning of the book, at Thor’s coronation:
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Consider that this book goes to great pains to point out that Odin favours Thor because Thor is a warrior like him. And yet even when Loki embraces that, even when he acts more war-like than ever before, Odin rejects him— just as he always has.
There is a reason why this moment is the last time Loki will ever call Odin his father. Because he realises once and for all that, no, nothing he tries will ever be good enough; no, Odin won’t ever look at him with pride. That is Loki’s burden. That is why he lets go.
The epilogue is really just two pages of making me want to vomit.
There’s your party where Thor and a certain subset of the fandom insist that Loki was mourned. There’s barely an indication here that anyone even perceives his demise as a negative thing.
“[Sif] could see Frigga thought [Loki was dead] as well” also contradicts the tie-in comic for TDW, so I don’t know what the author is on about there. Unlike the majority of Marvel comics, the tie-in comics are canon to the MCU, so it’s a bizarre statement to make.
COULD YOU SMEAR THE DEAD* ABUSE VICTIM A LITTLE HARDER, PLEASE? Fucking hell.
No matter how many times I encounter this scene, in whatever format, I still fail to become desensitized to how disgusting it is. I realise there’s a good chance that whatever version of events Thor has been told was twisted at best; but how you can look at a man whose son has just committed suicide under any circumstances and say there will never be a better father than that guy, is utterly beyond my capacity to understand.
And Odin’s “you’ve already made me proud” line just feels like extra salt in the wound because, again, Loki let go because he realized Odin would never say those words to him. And yet they come so damn easily when it’s Thor.
Fuck this entire family so much. I think I hate them more than Loki does. Sometimes I wonder what he would think about that. How he would react to knowing that not only is he actually loved, but that he’s so loved that people are genuinely furious at the way he’s been mistreated. That there are people who regularly devolve into full-on rants because they just can’t contain how much anger they have towards the people who hurt him. I think he’d have a hard time wrapping his head around that concept, tbh.
Anyways, to end on a not-completely-depressing note, I’m still waiting for someone at Marvel to explain how Loki knew what Thor said in this scene after plummeting into a wormhole. ‘Cause he references this conversation as Fauxdin at the end of TDW. So like… ?? Did he steal Odin’s memories before he erased them? Because that would be… kind of neat, actually. And very clever. Not entirely ethical, of course, but it’s Odin, so fuck ethics.
WELP, THAT’S IT. Thanks for following along with my dumbassery, hope you enjoyed yourselves. Lol
#phase one: thor#loki meta#thor meta#odin's a+ parenting#frigga's b+ parenting#topic: thor and loki's broken relationship#loki#thor#heimdall#lady sif#the warriors 3#jane foster#ragnarok cinematic universe#mcu#topic: asgardian hypocrisy#topic: asgardian militarism#topic: odin's family dynamic
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To All The Boys The Wizarding World Failed
Thomas Marvalo Riddle Junior. You were not a good person in the end. You were treated in such a way that twisted what little innocence you may once have held. You were sent back to a place, time after time that hated you as much as you hated it. You were sent from the only place that people like you may belong to. The wizarding world failed to protect you from the very people they themselves hid from. That does not excuse your responses, and actions though, perhaps, it does explain them. I wonder, what would you be like if you were adopted by a happy little family, a simple and calm bunch, would you have been evil still? Would you have learned to love? Who would you have become? Perhaps we’ll never know this answer, but still, I like to think about it from time to time.
Severus Tobias Snape. I wonder, had you been a prince would your life had been easier? Or would it have been harder? If you had been taken in by some family that doesn’t put you through hell would you have been kinder? If prejudice hadn’t been breed so carefully it almost seemed orchestrated would you have gone on to be a world-renowned potions master? If you had had better influences, kinder peers, a more caring family who would you be today? Would you have still taught children? Would you have still been a spy? Would you have still died? I wonder on this often.
Remus John Lupin. God, what the world would do to such a kind soul is perhaps the worst on this entire list. Perhaps. At fives years old a disgusting foul man did something unspeakable to you. And perhaps that is as much a reference as I make it seem, but it is not our business to know either way. You have been deemed a monster since then. How can people treat an innocent five-year-old attacked in an act of violence that you did not, in any way, shape, or form deserve? You were to be vilified by even your closest of friends, though I know they must have apologized, the fact that they thought it, no matter how unsurprising was and is bad enough. Your community will tell you that you are an evil horrible fucked-up twisted villain for so long that you will believe it no matter what friends and family tell you. You will believe it so well that you will convince yourself you are too much a monster to love your son. If no one had outed you to anyone that would listen, would you have been happier? Would you have lived easier? Found more work? Built your own life instead of having someone build it for you? I hope so. Perhaps, in another life, right?
Sirius Orion Black. Dear Sirius. So sweet, and yet so bitter. The world failed you as soon as it granted you life by placing you with a family that would always treat your questions as though they are treason. And perhaps to them, it was. You were treated like a disgrace for the house you were placed in at school even though you were only eleven and no one did a goddamned thing about it. Not even years later when you were placed somewhere “safe” by a meddlesome old man who thought himself all-knowing. You were not always good, but you were always bright, even when you were wrong, you were always loud even when you were rude. You lost your innocence before you had it. I wonder sometimes if you were a Slytherin, who would you be? Who would you have become? Someone better? Someone worse? I think you’d have taken the world by storm personally.
Regulus Arcturus Black. You, I have always wondered after. Were you a good man hidden under a mask of indifferent? I bet you were, I bet you secretly idolized your big brother, chasing after his coattails as many siblings tend to do. I hope, that for all they say about your color of tie your brother would still fiercely protect you as much as he did the brother he adopted. I hope that you really didn’t side with pureblood ideals, that you really didn’t like even the thought and idea of genocide. I hope that for the years you were trapped in a house that hated your brother, only to go to a true home that hated his tie, I hope that during these times you had something good, something worth dying for. I even wish, in the quietest parts of my mind, that you had something, perhaps, that you may have lived for in any other life. I wonder sometimes if you had grown with parents that loved as brightly as your brother, would that have even happened at all? I hope not.
Draco Lucius Malfoy. You have always been one of my favorites. Because I too thought I was better than others only to have that thought process violently ripped from my mind and body as though I was nothing more than a pretty little doll. And perhaps, we were. Pretty things to do as we’re told, to think what they told us to, to say what they wanted to hear. I can’t tell you how much you saved me, I can’t articulate into words how much I hate the way you were brought up. I probably never will be able to thank you for showing weakness and growing from it into an amazing man. One day, I hope to be like you if I’m to be completely honest. I hope to do something to right the wrongs of my (ex)step-father in any way I can bear. I hope that what I am doing to write my wrongs is something that you would do. Still, I wonder, if you had idolized your mother, if you had hero-worshipped, and idolized her, who would you have been then? Maybe, just maybe, you’d have been who you were always supposed to be far sooner. I’m proud of who you became, more than anyone else in that world.
Harry James Potter. Dear gods before you were even born your life was screwed over by “The Greater Good” old men who fought a war you should never have been involved in. You had your parents for barely a moment of your life. You had that happiness for even less. Your family called you a freak, your own aunt by blood, they hit you with frying pans and gods know what else, they insulted you at every twist and turn, they did whatever they could to assure you that you were someone horrible. But you had your mother’s spirit and your father’s pride. Even when they forced you to dumb yourself down, even when they made an entire neighborhood hate you, you did not let yourself believe them. Not truly anyways. You, Harry, are the person who taught me to stand tall when the entire world is against you, spare a random few. You taught me courage in the face of hate, you taught me to be kind, and gentle until the world will no longer let you. You taught me to fight until the end, to keep going no matter what because dammit, fuck everyone else, you fucking deserve a break. You deserve to be treated, for once in your life, not like a hero, but like a human. You deserved to make mistakes, to be angry, to hate, to love, to care, you, above all else, deserved to be treated like the amazing person you are. I wish, more often than I will ever honestly admit, that you had a better life, that fewer people had sought to control your life, sought to manipulate you as a pig for slaughter. And yet, I wonder, who would you have become somewhere else? Happier? Sadder? Would you have been light? Would you have been dark? Personally, I believe you would’ve have been the most neutral person in that entire universe. I wish I could tell you how much you have saved me from my own family, my own old men that mean well, and my own world.
{This is in no way meant to apologize for the many horrendous actions these people have committed, be it willing and consensual or not, though by now I hope you do know my stance on these actions. Nor is it supposed to ignore the many others I missed. It is merely an observation, and an apology, so to speak.}
#almost an#apology#tom riddle#severus snape#remus lupin#regulus black#draco malfoy#Harry Potter#had to spell-check that because the original version I moved from my writing app to here didn't replace the first draft
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