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yourcoolfriendwithallthecandy · 3 years

Text

Why So Jaded Chapter 7

FFN, AO3

Chapter 7

Violet woke up actually feeling happy as the imagery of her dream washed over her conscious memory which brought a small smile to her face. But then she heard a groan from Phillip and her smile vanished as she felt anger and rage start to build once again.

She got out of bed and went over to Phillip to see him stirring awake before she took the monitor off of him and put it back where it belonged before she came back and sat on the bed next to him as he went through is process of regaining consciousness before she called for room service for breakfast for herself and her team and knew that dealing with Phillip this morning would be especially bad as she weighed whether or not to wage war with him now or later as she decided that later would probably be best, when he wouldn’t be suffering through withdrawals again because Phillip had quite the history with cocaine especially and it had taken him getting clean as one of her terms for accepting to work for him. Because the chances of him relapsing had been so low and now they were especially high.

27 minutes.

He had done this in 27 minutes. After a year of keeping clean and all those promises of staying that way. All gone. In 27 minutes. That were sadly, the best 27 minutes of this whole trip for her. But it taught her to never let her guard down. And to not trust Phillip as far as she could kick him as she once again, made up her mind that she was never going to enjoy a romantic relationship with him. Never ever. And it was because of this shit right here.

Then Phillip cracked an eye open to see her sitting up in bed, her face was twisted into one of angry disgust but determination as his own memory of last night’s events before his all too brief high came back to him and he exhaled loudly with a wince before Violet turned and considered him.

“Good morning Mr. Sebastian.” Violet greeted coldly with a look that would freeze lava.

“Ok, on a scale of 1 being a funny haha ‘we’re gonna look back on this and laugh’ and ten being you’re gonna kill me and collect my inheritance, where are we?” Phillip asked with a grimace as he woke up.

“Oh a solid 8.5.” Violet answered.

“Fuck.” Phillip grunted before he sat up in bed and rested his back on the headboard next to her.

“Did you order breakfast yet? Can I at least get some coffee before you hand me my ass?” Phillip asked.

“I’m not going to hand you your ass Mr. Sebastian. It’s not my place as your handler to do such things. Now when you fully wake up and recover, I will recount last night’s events to you and explain to you exactly all the ways they crossed all the lines of propriety and decorum and then I’m going to absolutely insist that- that stunt you pulled last night was your big test. That Mr. Pine passed with flying colors and any further “testing” by you will result in my immediate termination of employment.” Violet answered.

“No. Please Violet. No. I’m sorry. Ok? I’m sorry, it was just a bad cheap joke. I will take whatever you want to throw at me if it’ll mean you don’t go back to pure asset and handler again. It can’t be that bad. Please. I will get down on my hands and knees and beg if I have to.” Phillip pleaded.

“No such measures will be taken. They are not acceptable terms.” Violet insisted before she heard the knock at the door and went and got it and brought in the breakfast cart and brought it over.

“What would you like for breakfast Mr. Sebastian?” Violet asked.

“Nooo...come on Violet. Just...come on, hit me with all of it, take it out on me. Look I admit, this was on me. I’m sorry. I know I broke my promise to you and I will make it up to you.” Phillip pleaded.

“No, last night was on me. I take full responsibility for the incident. Technically I should fire myself for the lapse in judgement. I’m just happy I won enough last night in the casino to pay for it in cash so I didn’t have to have any other evidence of last night, other than my memory and the cocaine in your body.” Violet answered as she dutifully fixed him a plate and handed it to him on a tray in his lap.

“So, what I need from you is confirmation that no other tests will be administered on Mr. Pine and that you will honor my agreement as set forth in the recording.” Violet offered.

“Of course. But Violet please, please tell me how to make this right.” Phillip begged.

“Mr. Sebastian, words can not fully describe the mortification I felt at seeing my own knock off image in the form of a prostitute and then to have said prostitute offered up to Mr. Pine on a silver platter, it was pure entrapment and you know it. But if that wasn’t enough, I also had to see the same thing in the form of my most cherished mentor. That completely humiliated me in addition to Mr. Pine. But for now, let’s leave him out of it. Let’s keep this with me. I wasn’t by your side for a whole 27 minutes. I had just enough time to go to the bar on the roof and get a drink and then I had to come right back down. I had Veronica inject you with Narcan. I had to scrub not only the room and you but I had to scrub the last 24 hours from two prostitutes to bury the evidence. Thankfully Patrice and Julie are trusted and vetted and were happy to just get paid off. They had to tie you to the bed to keep you from taking your own life again because you were convinced you were a Super yourself and could fly. You tried jumping off the balcony and those two “gifts” that you got Mr. Pine, tried to help you do it too. They also had to be forcibly restrained while getting scrubbed. Your stunt to catch Mr. Pine in a compromising situation, ended up compromising me and it blew up in my face and it illustrated beyond the shadow of a doubt that I have become way too lax in my job because you were in so much danger. And I broke my own promise to protect you and keep you out of harm’s way. And for that I’m sorry.” Violet specified, trying to keep her rage in check but her sadness was so palpable that Phillip felt remorse that it effectively backfired in spectacular fashion before she sat down in a nearby chair and got her own breakfast before Phillip’s security came and got the rest and took it out into the rest of the suite so Violet and Phillip could keep their privacy.

“So now I want to know why you did it. What were your reasons for it?” Violet pressed.

“I just...I wanted you to lose respect for him. I thought he would jump at the chance to relieve any frustrations he may have been having and if I can get him to relapse, he would be breaking his own contract trying to get drugs into SEB. And I wanted to see if he still harbored feelings for Natalia or had developed any for you.” Phillip confessed.

“Well, it backfired, spectacularly. Because the only one who lost respect is you- from me. Second, you’re the one who ended up relapsing. And you’re the one who broke your own contract with me about remaining clean, which technically, means I can now walk away from you and it turns our contract null and void and we are in Vegas at a tech expo, I could, in theory go to any number of your competitors and get the same job I have for them and there would be nothing you could do about it. And if anything this proved you wrong in every aspect you were trying to test. Because Mr. Pine reacted flawlessly. He stopped, he relied on his own security team which they are all thanking their lucky stars that they weren’t involved and he politely but firmly refused the gift and I should have sent that gift packing and been done with it. But instead, I was feeling spiteful because you were sulking and pouting like a toddler for whatever reasons you have for doing so- which pissed me off but it’s my job as your handler to coddle you and cater to you despite however I feel about it. And I let my own personal feelings cloud my judgement which was a very stupid and frankly rookie mistake. And you know me, I rarely let myself repeat the same mistake twice so this mistake will never be repeated.” Violet insisted firmly.

“So, how you can make up for this- is you are going to honor our agreement we made just as we were leaving, and agree that the stunt last night was your big perfect test for him and admit that he passed and then you are never going to test him again because guess what, I got him to admit it to my face that he looks at me as Mirage 2.0 which means that Objective Natalia has been a success and you’re going to approve weekly outings for him. And then what you’re going to do to make it up to me- is you are going to take the noncompete out of my contract and then you’re going to have to earn my trust and respect back piece by piece and inch by inch to get us back to where we were before this fiasco because while I want to write this off as a dirty trick gone wrong. My hurt and my mortification sting way too badly right now and my own ability to trust you took a big hit because I couldn’t trust you to honor your promise to me to never do drugs again because all it took was 27 minutes. In 27 minutes you have undone a year’s worth of trust building Phillip and I don’t know how long it will take you to earn it back because you know I'm a once bitten twice shy kind of person and I sincerely doubt it was worth it because the Narcan should have reversed it into your system. And my guard is back up and it’s going to take a lot from you to get it to come back down for you.” Violet decided, calmly but firmly and the more she talked, the more her anger dissipated but she still knew that Phillip was using his powers to ease the anger and the rage to push her to forgive him, and for that, her own resentment towards him just grew because the more he used his “secret” powers and the longer it took for him to admit it. The more she distrusted him as Violet and it just pushed her to stay in “Invisigirl” mode with him.

“That’s fair, I’m so sorry Violet. I never considered how this could backfire and I never would have done it if I thought, much less knew this would come back to you in any way. And I’m sorry and again, this is on me, I take full responsibility for this and please don’t let this become the thing that breaks us and losing your trust and your respect is worse than breaking any contract and if there’s anything else I can do to make it up to you, just say the word.” Phillip apologized. Which Violet appreciated.

“God damn it.” Violet huffed as she got up went over to the bed and got settled in next to him and figured she could give him an out to confess to more.

“Why is it almost impossible for me to stay mad at you?” Violet questioned which got Phillip to smile in relief.

“I don’t know, but I’m grateful for whatever it is.” Phillip assured her as he carefully wrapped his arm around her shoulders but grinned when she snuggled into his side as Violet could only feel disappointment that even though he didn’t have anything else to lose, he still wouldn’t admit the truth.

“So what’s the number now?” Phillip bravely inquired.

“A five.” Violet honestly answered.

“Ok, well let me know what I can do to lesson it to a one or two.” Phillip answered.

“Will do Phillip.” Violet answered which got him to grin because she was calling him by his name again.

Violet didn’t have to wait for long. Because once they got dressed and ready for the day and met back up at the Expo, Buddy called out to her.

“Ms. Parr?” Buddy called when she passed him as he walked away from his friends to talk with her one on one.

“Yes Mr. Pine?” Violet asked.

“Hey so my friends would really like to come and pay me a social visit at SEB, is there any way we could try to work something out?” Buddy asked hopefully, even though he had prepared himself for her to say no but Violet just smiled happily.

“Of course Mr. Pine, I’ll handle it personally, granted there will be some protocols that would need to be followed by you and your guests but yes, that can be arranged, simply give me the times and dates according to your knowledge and I’ll arrange it.” Violet answered.

“Really? Why?” Buddy asked before Violet stepped closer.

“To help you forget that the incident last night never occurred and if it would help everyone save face.” Violet answered. “You haven’t said anything to anyone about it have you?” Violet asked worriedly.

“Oh God no. No. No. Never, I’ll happily take that to my grave.” Buddy eagerly assured her.

“Then we have a deal.” Violet offered her hand for him to shake before he took and shook it firmly.

“See you at the announcement Mr. Pine.” Violet offered sweetly before she excused herself and went back to Phillip’s side.

“I found a way to make the situation last night right and a way that everyone can save face.” Violet murmured quietly to Phillip.

“I’m all ears.” Phillip eagerly answered.

“In exchange for Mr. Pine to completely forget about the incident last night and take what could possibly remain to his grave, which was my condition for his request after hearing it because Mr. Pine would never blackmail you because blackmailing you means blackmailing me and he could never bring himself to do that because of 2.0, but if we fulfill this request- we’re back where we were before we left to come here.” Violet began.

“What’s the request?” Phillip asked.

“Mr. Pine would like his friends to come and visit him socially, I warned him that there would be protocols that they would all have to adhere to, like no discussing business or revealing any confidential, proprietary information or property or projects, that kind of thing. And that they would have to be vetted and submit to safety measures.” Violet dictated.

“And that would bring my five to a one. If you’d agree to it.” Violet added as extra incentive.

“Done deal.” Phillip happily agreed, grateful it wasn’t any more worse than it was and if that’s all it would take to get them back to where they were before they left, he’d happily agree.

“And if it would take that one to a zero, I’d be willing to make it a regular thing.” Phillip offered. “Deal and done Phillip.” Violet cooed before Phillip snuck a quick kiss to her temple which got her to blush and smile bashfully and crinkle her nose at him for the PDA since they were surrounded by people but Phillip just beamed a cheesy smile of his own.

The announcement of the collaboration was received well and true to Violet’s predictions and intentions it garnered a lot of positive press for both of them.

“Mr. Sebastian, care to comment about the recent photos that came out showing you in a private moment in the hotel’s swimming pool with a close colleague, is there a romance blossoming between you? Is this the rumored girlfriend that we have seen by your side repeatedly for the last year?” A reporter asked before Violet did a quick search as she stood behind the scenes and found the pictures in a tabloid and sent them to Phillip’s own tablet in front of him that had all the press release announcements and talking points on it.

“No. As always, my personal life is personal and no business of yours or anyone else and I will not be taking any more questions on the topic.” Phillip said simply as Buddy looked up the pictures on his own tablet quickly and found them.

“Mr. Pine? Do you have any comment on…?”

“No I do not. And I would also appreciate it if this conference could get back on track.” Buddy insisted before he steered the conversation back to the technology and why they were there which Violet was grateful for.

Once the expo was over and they had gotten back, he was grateful Violet stayed and helped him settle back in.

“How often does that happen?” Buddy asked.

“How often does what happen?” Violet asked as she hung up his suits in his walk in closet for him.

“How often does your relationship with Phillip get questioned by the media?” Buddy specified.

“Every single time he speaks to the press.” Violet answered.

“Doesn’t Phillip care that every time the media gets your picture and knows your name because you are working for him under your name and not a pseudonym that- that puts you at risk of being found out?” Buddy questioned, feeling a surge of protectiveness.

“It was part of the contract that I work for him under my own name. Because he wanted to make sure that he was getting the real deal and the genuine article and "all of me" and 100% transparency and if anything ever happened to him, that I wouldn’t have any confusion trying collect payments as someone other than myself and my family because I’m actually in his will. Which works out, because it does make things a whole lot more simpler in real life instead of having to answer by a different name and identity. All I have to watch out for is not using my powers in front of people who don’t already know the truth but among Phillip’s closest friends, they all know who I am and who I really am and they know that I’m his own private personal Super who's on constant retainer and if they cross him, they deal with me which is all the deterrent I need to be for most of them and I’m not the only one in my position. More and more of the rich and famous have learned that they can just rent or buy their own Super, either on their own, which makes finding them in the first place difficult. Or they just go to the source- aka The Agency and get one from there because more and more The Agency has turned into "Rent-A-Center for Supers". And as long as Invisigirl isn’t caught with Phillip in any compromising situations, because all Invisigirl is- is a ghost anymore, and all anyone has ever seen of me as her is when I was a teenager in my old suit and not in my current super suit or any other super suit I've had since then, and I've had a lot of them. How you recognized me in my new suit, was a surprise, but one that I appreciate that you keep to yourself and don’t breathe a word to anyone, which is a protection in of itself. Most people just think I’m some other Super when and if they ever see me as her anymore, like Black Widow or Shadow or DejaVu or Mirror or any number of them, but those are usually the most popular. So, yes it’s a risk, but it’s also a hassle I don’t have to add to my already full plate. Besides, in two years, it won’t matter. And every rumor that springs up, only keeps Phillip in the spotlight that much longer, which is something I think he would die if he had to go without.” Violet appraised as she just continued to put his things away, neatly and orderly as Buddy just helped her, handing her his things and watching in awed adoration how wonderful it was to see her be so down to earth and domestic, being barefoot in his closet since her heels had been kicked off by the door and had him hoping and praying that while they were both at SEB that that wasn’t the only time he would ever enjoy this as the emerald necklace he had managed to get for her practically burned a hole in his pocket.

Nelson had gotten it for him because out of all the people that were on Buddy’s team, Buddy and Nelson got along the most and Nelson was secretly shipping his boss with Buddy because he had noticed the marked change in Violet whenever she was on “Buddy duty” and he liked how nice and sweet she was whenever she got to spend time with Buddy and it was Nelson who secretly suggested to Buddy to get her an emerald necklace after what had happened at the black jack table and Buddy had simply given Nelson the vast majority of his winnings to buy what Nelson would think she would like since Nelson knew Violet better than Buddy did and what Nelson had come back with- made Buddy so happy. It was on the small side, so it wasn’t gaudy or too flashy for Violet’s tastes, something she could wear everyday and feel special in without drawing too much attention by anyone but the very observant.

“Actually, with how little I get to see my parents now, even though we all live right here in Metroville and they only live across town, they usually use the tabloids to figure out where I am and what I’m up to.” Violet confessed as she was done and knew that if she spent any more time in Buddy’s closet, she was going to reorganize it to keep her hands busy so her mouth could run and she needed to stop talking before she let out any more secrets or possibly tell on herself even more and risk ruining the friendship she was enjoying with Buddy by wanting something more from him.

“You really are just an emerald, in too tight of a setting huh?” Buddy asked.

“Yeah, part of me wants to buy a loose emerald and keep it in my pocket and I can just pull it out and threaten to drop it to illustrate how close he is to destroying the one thing he “claims” is most important to him. But he just doesn’t...he doesn’t care enough to loosen the setting or back off enough to just give me breathing room. Where I don’t have to constantly filter everything I say or do because there’s always eyes and ears wherever I go.” Violet answered as she took up leaning against the opposite side of the door frame from his bedroom to his closet as once again, their body language mirrored each other.

“Is it worth it though?” Buddy asked.

“It has to be doesn’t it?” Violet returned but she didn't sound convinced.

“I don’t think it is. You shouldn’t put a price, even as one as high as the one you’ve named, on your sanity or integrity, because if you break, the world will lose one of the greatest gems it has and we’ll all be helpless in mourning it’s loss and if you ever find yourself teetering on the precipice, shatter this before you let yourself be shattered.” Buddy offered before he handed her the box which got Violet to frown in confusion at it before she took it and considered it thoughtfully.

Violet opened it and fought not to cry. It was such a small, simple but elegant and beautifully crafted necklace that was Edwardian in design. It was perfect. And the meaning behind it made it even that much more precious.

“Thank you Buddy.” Violet thanked him as she easily enveloped him in a tight hug that Buddy was all too happy to return and they just spent a blissfully long moment hugging each other and clinging to each other and Buddy didn’t let go until Violet did.

“Thank you, I needed the reminder. And the hug.” Violet confessed as she tried to blink away the glassiness in her eyes and it was Buddy who gave her a small, sad smile. Saying so much without needing to say anything and for that she was eternally grateful and Violet looked at him and realized that if she stayed another minute, she was liable to show him and tell him everything and she couldn’t let herself be that vulnerable, not yet anyway, and not when there were so many eyes and ears watching and listening.

“I should go, I have myself to unpack. Let me know when your friends want to come, and I’ll do what I can to make them feel welcome.” Violet offered before she excused herself from his bedroom.

“Good night Buddy, get some rest, you’ve earned it.” Violet offered over her shoulder as she did as Buddy followed her out.

“You too Violet.” Buddy mirrored. Damning himself for not being brave enough to say more.

Violet went straight to her car and drove home, the small box tightly in her fist as she wondered how he had managed to get this. Because Veronica hadn’t said anything about this, nothing about visiting a jewelry store or even a pawn shop when she had sent in her report on the flight home as part of her debriefing. She wondered if perhaps one of Buddy’s security detail had done this as she mentally tried to figure out who it was before the memory of Violet getting flustered by staring at Buddy chest and arms came to mind and how Nelson had reacted to her reaction.

Good on Nelson.

Once Violet got home she went and got into her spy gear and put the box into a compartment.

“Scan and report.” Violet demanded as she sat and waited for the box and it’s contents to be scanned and prayed that it wouldn’t find anything bad, like some malware or any kind of tracker that she couldn't detect herself and anxiously waited as she put her other things away before the device chirped at her and she smiled in relief when the only objects of the jewelry box, was a necklace, made out of diamonds, emeralds and platinum inside a cardboard and velvet box. That was it. Then she took it out and happily put it on herself and looked in the mirror and couldn’t stop smiling. She could wear this every day and be perfectly happy and feel special. It was such a small but powerful thing.

Meanwhile Phillip had watched the feed and frowned before he realized he needed to one up this gesture before he called the best jewelry store in town and had them open back up just for him so he could get the perfect set of emerald jewelry for Violet and then once he had made his purchase he then went back to SEB to get it “finished”.

Monday morning Violet put together her most flattering green outfit to match her new necklace and even did her hair in luscious curls again and did her makeup extra beautifully and practically strut into work.

“Good morning Phillip, hope you slept well, what do we have for Mr. Pine this morning?” Violet asked as she came into his office.

“Uh, nothing new, hey I got you something,” Phillip said as he presented her with a hard leather jewelry set case before Violet paused and looked at it and looked at him before her shoulders dropped and fixed him with a look.

“Really? You just up and decided to get me jewelry? Out of the blue?” Violet questioned wearily.

“Well, no not out of the blue. Look, what the psychic said struck a chord with me and I knew I couldn’t get you anything while we were out in Vegas because I wanted it to be a surprise so I waited until we came back and got it for you last night, it’s my way of making up for what I did to you over the weekend.”

“Phillip, jewelry is not gonna fix…oh my God!” Violet exclaimed when he opened it and Violet’s jaw and heart both dropped as she set both hands on his desk on either side of it and stared in disbelief at it. It couldn’t be real. Before she started to touch it but her own sensitive senses were telling her this was crawling with "bugs" and she subconsciously pulled her hand back.

“Oh I beg to differ.” Phillip smugly countered.

“And you’re already wearing the perfect outfit.” Phillip cooed as he came around to take the other necklace off but Violet side stepped him and out of reach.

“Phillip? How much did you spend on this?” Violet asked.

“It doesn’t matter, as long as you love it, that’s all that matters.” Phillip insisted.

“Yeah, no. Phillip, is this real?” Violet pressed.

“Yeah it’s a real necklace and bracelet and ring and earrings and everything.” Phillip confirmed.

“No, like, genuine, this isn’t costume jewelry or…” Violet began.

“Oh no, it’s the genuine article.” Phillip assured her before he pulled out the jewels from the case and showed her the providence letter under them in the case and Violet gasped when she saw the price and saw that it was down in writing that it belonged to her.

“Phillip, no, no I can’t accept this.” Violet tried to argue.

“But I thought you liked it?” Phillip questioned.

“No, I do, I love it, it’s beautiful, it is single handedly the most amazing jewelry I’ve ever seen in my life and I’m so profoundly flattered and honored but Phil, I need like six bodyguards if I’m going to wear it in public, this is- 'wear this with a gown on the red carpet or attend a gala' kind of necklace and otherwise keep it locked up in a safe to keep it from being stolen kind of necklace. It’s too much, I’m overwhelmed.” Violet tried to explain as she felt panic grip her chest and her stomach churn.

“No, no, Sweetheart, no, don’t be overwhelmed. You are the most precious, most amazing jewel in the universe and I wanted to make sure you knew that and I wanted to make sure you felt it in every fiber of your being. You’re practically a goddess, and this is my offering of worship.” Phillip cooed as he came around and hugged her from behind and Violet felt his powers push her anxiety down and pumped euphoria into her and she couldn’t help it she wracked a sob which alarmed Phillip who came around and hugged her from the front as he did all he could to calm her down and soothe her.

“I’m sorry it’s overwhelming. I'm not trying to force you to take it. If it’s too much too fast, and I’m coming on too strong just tell me.” Phillip realized.

“Phillip, it’s too much too fast and you’re coming on too strong. I’m flattered and honored, I really am but come on. I know you’re just making the biggest, and probably the most romantic gesture you can but you know how practical I am and you already know if it's romantic- that that puts us into too dangerous of territory. Take it back, get your money back. And if you still want to get me something emerald or whatever and something nice. Take what I’m currently wearing as your cue of the size and grandeur that I’m comfortable with. Something smaller, a bit more discrete. Something that I will feel comfortable wearing on special occasions or even every day or just on the days I want to feel extra special. OK? Can we compromise on this? Please? Or you can start off small and work your way up, like a good anal plug set.” Violet tried to tease through the last of her tears which got Phillip to chuckle.

“Ok, I got you. Loud and clear, let me go and try again.” Phillip offered.

“Thank you, but before you go, let me at least get a picture of it, like a keepsake.” Violet offered before she got a picture of it.

“Ok, now I gotta go back to my office and straighten up and Mr. Pine is probably wondering how late I slept in this morning.” Violet urged as she gave him a sweet kiss then took her tablet and went to her office and got her emergency makeup set out and went to her private bathroom and got straightened up.

“What the fuck are you doing Violet, you should have taken the jewels. Should have taken them and graciously accepted them. They were perfect and gorgeous and amazing, but no- your humility and self worth issues strike again to ruin all your good things.” Violet muttered to herself as she got her things and went down to Buddy’s floor.

“Good morning Mr. Pine, I apologize for the delay, Mr. Sebastian had an unexpected...uh...development.” Violet tried to excuse herself.

“Everything ok?” Buddy asked as he looked her over carefully because he could sense something was seriously wrong and off.

“Have you been crying?” Buddy breathed in a whisper and Violet could only nod as tears came flooding back to her eyes as the panic came back with a vengeance because Phillip's powers weren't there to suppress it.

“Excuse me, I need to use your restroom.” She excused herself as she dumped her things on his counter and quickly ran as fast as her pencil skirt would allow and went into his lab’s bathroom where she knew there was no cameras or listening devices and broke down again, sitting on the toilet seat cover and just wracked sob after sob as Buddy could only pace outside the bathroom because to see her upset was upsetting him and hearing her cry was torturing him worse than anything.

“Violet, please, please let me in, can you tell me what’s wrong?” Buddy pleaded through the door as he pressed his forehead to the door.

“It’s open.” Violet managed to say before Buddy slipped in and saw her sitting on the toilet, her makeup a mess and shaking and he was on his knees in front of her in an instant and curling as much of himself around her in a subconscious effort to protect her and shield her and comfort her as his hands ran down from her arms to her hands before she held onto both of his hands with both of hers so, so tight.

“Violet, what happened?” Buddy pressed, getting choked up and emotional himself as he started crying watching her cry because this was hurting him way worse than that jet turbine ever could.

“I can’t take much more of this.” Violet confessed before she, out of habit, put up a forcefield around them because if she didn’t tell him, tell someone safe, since he was the only safe person she had left, she was going to die.

“You gave me this beautiful, amazing, sentimental gift which I love and appreciate so much and I’m so flattered and honored that you would go through so much trouble that even when you’re locked up in here and there’s so many layers of security between you and the outside world and you go through all that trouble of smuggling it in here just to get it to me. And it means so much to me. And Phillip had the audacity to try and one up it, and he did so in about 12 hours. I came into work early, I tried to color coordinate with the necklace because I wanted you to see me in it and see that I appreciated it. And what did he do? He gifted me a 35 million dollar emerald jewelry set. The only thing this didn’t have was a fucking tiara, it had this huge gaudy necklace that would break my collar bones if I tried to put it on with emeralds as big as my eyeballs and diamonds even bigger than that and earrings that would pull my ears off my head and a ring that I would drown me if I tried to go swimming wearing it and a bracelet that would yank my arm out of my shoulder socket. And it was too much. It was so overwhelming and when I tried to refuse, he used his powers to push me to accept it and force euphoria into my head and push my feelings of discomfort out with it and he went on and on about how 'I’m this amazing jewel of the universe and how I’m a goddess and it was a gift of worship' and it was too much. He’s never forced his powers on me that strongly before and I panicked. And it took so much begging and pleading just for him to see that I would never feel comfortable ever wearing it without a full security detail of my own- for him to back off. And I just said everything and anything I could to get myself out of there and thank God I could come and see you. Part of me wants to move in here with you and only want to see Phillip twice a day or twice a year or twice a decade for that matter instead of the other way around. And now he’s on his way back to the jewelry store to get me something smaller.” Violet professed between hard, wracking sobs.

“And the worst part is, is because of my powers that I'm so incredibly sensitive to technology and anything and everything that runs on electricity or any kind of current and signals, even the human body or animals, I'm even sensitive to electromagnetism, I can tell when there’s cameras and listening devices especially. And that jewelry was practically crawling with them, and it feels like it's spiders, creepy crawly spiders, just crawling and infested with spiders and it made my skin crawl, they were embedded under every single big jewel into its socket so that whenever I wore it, wore all of it or just a piece of any of it- it would be just another tracking device, another way to keep me under the microscope.” Violet bawled.

“And I hate it and I hate how it’s like he plays dumb. It’s like he has no idea that I know. And I can’t confront him. I could and would lose my job and my head because every other Super who’s had this job, it was all the surveillance and counter-surveillance that pushed them to quit because they couldn’t take it. That’s the setting that’s too tight. Knowing that every single moment of every single day I'm being watched and recorded and anything and everything I say or do can and will be used against me, like I'm constantly under a superpowered microscope and constantly scrutinized and judged and it's like it's suffocating me and smothering me and I can't breathe. And if Phillip actually, honestly cared about me and loved me as much as he claims, wouldn’t he be honest about all of it? Wouldn’t he back off? Wouldn’t he admit to me and go ‘hey, I’m actually a Super like you and these are my powers’ and I have given him countless opportunities to come clean, to tell me, make him feel like he has nothing to lose and everything to gain by telling me and if he were to actually ask me if I want them used on me instead of being forced onto me. It would make all the difference in the world. Especially since they’re mind control and feeling control, it’s so invasive and it undoes me from the inside out.” Violet shuddered as Buddy felt like his heart just got ripped out of his chest and put back into a blender.

“He would, if he really wanted to love you, he would.” Buddy confirmed.

“And the sad part is, sometimes I like it, and am so grateful for it, like when I’m having panic attacks and breakdowns like I’m having right now, it’s nice to get extra help to calm down or when we’re having sex and he’s closer than I am but he want’s to be gentleman so he pushes me and gets in my head and gives me that extra push to get me to the finish line. But when it’s against my will and against my own genuine feelings, it's different. When I’m mad at him for fucking up or pissing me off by playing head games, he forces me to get over it and forgive him and get over it or he uses my strong emotions and flips them like a light switch so one minute I’m so mad at him I want to push him off this building and he flips it in a snap and suddenly I’m having the hottest sex of my life fucking his brains into oblivion while he does the same for me, like break up sex and makeup sex all rolled into one. And it feels awesome in the moment, like I’m having sex with God, like I’m perfectly high and relaxed and so into it and so far into the zone, it’s a different time zone, not even the same continent and it’s just pure bliss and then I get far enough away from him where his powers can’t reach me, then my real feelings come back and they come back with a vengeance and it's even worse after than it was before and I regret all of it and I feel sick and dirty and no better than a prostitute only it's not just my body that's being bought, it's my mind and soul too. And when he does drugs, it amplifies it and make it almost impossible to resist, even as a super and normal humans don't stand a chance. That’s why I had to scrub those hookers in Vegas, because they gave him coke and MDMA and he was so strong, one of them was practically a mindless drone. It’s why him doing drugs is one of my deal breakers because even I and the strongest Supers I know can’t resist him when he’s on them. No one can.” Violet choked out.

“Because he’s…!” Buddy began, before he growled dangerously because he wanted to scream but he couldn’t freak her out or scare her any more than she already was.

“Violet, he is raping you! Every time he pushes it and you don’t want it- that’s literally the definition of rape Violet. It doesn’t matter how awesome the sex is, if it’s unwanted, it’s rape. Period. It’s not sex any more because if he didn’t have his powers, you’d be able to resist him and kick his ass so hard, you’d break his fucking pelvis in. Like this is Jessica Jones and Purple Man level of fucked up shit.” Buddy pointed out doing his best to keep his voice down, even as hard as it was not to holler and scream all this at the top of his lungs.

“I know. But there’s nothing else I can do. And after, I just throw up, I throw up so much because I’m so sick of myself and that’s the only way I can look this good and still eat the way I do which is just one step away from an eating disorder. And I hate myself so much for it. And then when he gets me lavish gifts it’s like he’s buying me and buying my forgiveness with stuff, it’s expensive stuff but it just makes me feel so cheap. And no matter how much I try to explain it away and reason it away, it’s like dealing with an alcoholic, until they admit that they have a problem, they’re never going to see it. And I’ve been doing everything in my power to save all of this for my last day of work two years from now and hand him his ass in all the ways I want to and have been fantasizing about. And it’s like he’s trying so hard to turn me into a gold digging, materialistic, manipulative, dominatrix queen, and I hate it. Not to knock BDSM, there’s nothing wrong with it when it’s done safely, consensually and willingly by everyone involved but it’s just not for Violet. Invisigirl can do it all, no problem but Violet is very vanilla. But he’s my asset and I have to coddle and cater to him and do whatever it takes to get the job done, those are my unquestioning and unwavering orders. And I can’t find a replacement to save my life. Literally. And I’m stuck. I’m stuck in a setting that’s too tight and it's trying to carve itself into me, chipping away at me until I fit right.” Violet confided between hard sobs and Buddy never saw more red in his life. He wanted nothing more than to destroy Phillip. He wanted to blow up this building. He wanted Phillip’s head on a platter and then flambéed.

And all Buddy could do was cry while holding onto her hands as he knelt in front of her and tried to protectively curl his body around hers as much as he could and he felt so...helpless. He hated it.

“Violet you have to get away from this. You have to get out. Fuck contracts, fuck the money, you can have every red cent I have. I will find a way to get you wherever you want or need to go. You need to save yourself. Stop trying to save everyone, especially me when it’s you who needs the most saving. Alright, look, I’ll come clean. Cause keeping this from you has been killing me, and I’m so sorry but I’ve been having secret correspondence through my shipping labels sending coded messages to IRize and Zone and all my other companies because I’ve been trying to get all your medical data out of here and safe so that even if Phillip were to try to hold your meds over you to keep you with him, you would have another source, a safe and secure one and one that wouldn’t come with terms and conditions or strings of any kind. And the reason I was so nervous before I left was because my companies all offered to spring me free while we were in Vegas and I told them repeatedly not to, not until I could get you and your meds and everything pertaining to you- safe and secured. And I know I lied to you on Friday and I felt awful and I was so relieved when it was just the hookers at the room because I genuinely thought I would get to my room and find my own guys there to overtake the security and get me away. But I couldn’t do that to you because your trust and your friendship and these precious two months being with you mean more to me than my own freedom. I will stay here as long as I need to, I’ll stay here five, ten, twenty years if I have to and I’ll kiss the outside world goodbye if it means you can walk away free and live in it and heal from all the hurt that prick has done to you. Get out of here Violet. Go. If I can survive a jet turbine, I can survive anything and everything Phillip wants to throw at me, powers be damned.” Buddy confessed as he squeezed her hands so tight as his tears streamed down his face as Violet just stared in shock at him.

“Break the necklace Violet, break the necklace and throw it in his face, come clean and tell him that you know everything, expose him for what he really is, bring hell to his doorstep, give him the bird right before you vanish so he never can find you again. And I will do everything I can to dismantle his empire brick by brick if I have to if it means that you never have to deal with him ever again. He is abusing you. He’s beating you without ever having to throw a punch and that is the worst kind of abuse there is. Violet please. I can’t take this, it’s a miracle you’re still alive and sane. Violet you are cracking. How many more hits will it be before you shatter?” Buddy pleaded desperately.

"I don't know." Violet confessed as she cried a new wave of tears.

“Look, I’m good at fixing things but even this is beyond me. I will be whatever you need or want me to be. Just tell me what to do and I’ll do it. I’ll do anything and everything if it means you’ll be ok. Please, Violet, please, please, please.” Buddy begged before he brought her hands up to his lips and kissed her knuckles, squeezing his eyes so tight and Violet was so moved because it was Buddy who genuinely cared for her. Even when he had so much to lose, he’d give what little he did have up for her and if he was exposing himself like this. He was being as honest and as transparent as he could be and Violet couldn’t be more grateful or more moved. Now that she knew that, she could help hide it even more.

“You won’t make it that long. The only reasons I’ve not said anything is because every single person who’s ever confronted him about his powers- is dead. And the reason they’re dead is because he plants something of a computer virus into their heads, into their minds and it drives them insane to the point they commit suicide, sometimes within days, sometimes within hours, sometimes within minutes. Minutes. Buddy, I’m terrified you are going to make it three years and a day. I’m so scared you’re going to leave this place and be within a five hundred foot radius of him so he can plant the bug in you. And then you’re going to go home and kill yourself because he’ll do the same thing to you. I’m afraid I’ll do the same thing because if he can’t have me, no one can because he’s so possessive and jealous and dangerous. He proved it with this necklace thing. You dared to give me anything, the smallest of things. Something tangible and he had to outdo it. And you’re not the only one who’s been in contact with others about this situation. I haven’t quit because as bad as all this abuse is, it’s still not as bad as losing you. I can’t lose you. You’re the one good thing in my life right now. And I don’t want him to use you against yourself by pushing you to take your own life or use you against me or me against you or me against me. Which is why I put a clause that in the event of your death, doesn’t matter how you die, everything you touch, all the royalties go back to your own companies. That’s why I’m pushing you to get your hands on everything you can design wise and putting your name and your mark and your seal on everything I can get my hands on. Yeah, you’ll lose percentages now, but if push comes to shove, at least everyone you employ will be ok and your second empire won’t fall like the first one did. This is why I haven’t had any romantic relationships while I’m here- is because Phillip has already torpedoed every attempt and sabotaged it. And it’s why I’m fighting myself so hard to not get closer to you because I don’t want him to sabotage us. He has me backed into a corner but the thing is, you’re behind me and I’m the only thing between you and him. And I’ll bear this and be your shield till my dying day because it has to stop somewhere. And it stops here, it stops with you and right this second, Jack is working on a way to expose Phillip’s powers and find a way to shield me and shield you from them and I’ll do all I can to at least protect your security guards at least so they don’t turn on you. Jack and Edna have been working on it for a year. All they need is time. Can we please, give them time. They’re so close. Just a little longer. Just endure this with me a little longer.” Violet confessed as she held onto his hands like they were a lifeline.

“For me? Can you do that for me?” Violet begged.

“Only for you. But the second it’s ready, we’re out of here.” Buddy insisted.

“I’ll spring you myself.” Violet finally smiled as her anxiety finally calmed down and she felt absolution and relief as it subsided as she let go of his hands to reach for the toilet paper to wipe up her streaking makeup before Buddy got up and some paper towels and got them wet with hot water in the sink before he handed them to her.

“Damn it, I really liked the way I did my makeup today too.” Violet tried to laugh as she just used it to wipe off all her makeup.

“You don’t need it, you’re beautiful no matter what and you could wear burlap and bring it into fashion, not that you care about that kind of thing.” Buddy assured her.

“Thanks. Jack tells me the same thing every time I see him.” Violet chuckled before she finally finished wiping it all off and throwing the now dirty, cooling paper towels in the trash before she happily pulled Buddy into a tight hug which he was more than ready to return. He had wanted to kiss her. But with the way Phillip used his powers in that aspect of her life, he knew if he tried to push any kind of romantic, intimate gestures now- it would not go over well and she would probably reject them and him. She was too gun-shy. If she wanted to be romantically intimate with him, she’d have to make the first move because he sure as hell wasn’t going to push it. She needed a friend and a confidant right now and that’s what he was going to be.

“Thank you so much, please, don’t breathe a word of this to anyone.” Violet pleaded.

“Only until we have an out.” Buddy compromised.

“Deal.” Violet huffed a laugh.

“Goodness you give the best hugs. I could hug you all day long if you let me.” Violet confessed with a halfhearted giggle as she nuzzled her face into the crux of his neck and shoulder absolutely relishing this because this hug was all she could ask for from a hug.

“Well you know where I am. Come and get one whenever you want.” Buddy offered as he wanted to kiss the crown of her head, but resisted. The poor girl just needed a platonic hug. He could give her that.

“Don’t offer anything you’re not fully prepared to be taken up on.” Violet playfully warned.

“I never do.” Buddy reassured her with a wry grin.

“I’d have to do it while I’m invisible though. I could give you three taps on the arm in warning before I do.” Violet urged.

“Yeah, about that, uh, because of your similar powers to Tali, she taught me how to find her even when she was invisible, because I can feel just about all the hairs on my body stand on end when you’re close enough to me.” Buddy confessed.

“Huh. Interesting. Well, again, three taps and then get to a bathroom because there’s no cameras or listening devices in them but there are some just outside of them. Cause otherwise to see you hug air will be suspicious.” Violet proposed.

“You got it.” Buddy readily agreed.

“And then, slowly but surely, if you could teach me the way you’re encoding the messages, I’ll try to learn it and if you’d be ok with me sending a few of my own so I can get something established with them too, just in case something goes sideways, to make safety nets and contingency plans and I’ll happily show you them so you know what I’m saying and telling them so we can coordinate.” Violet offered.

“Yeah, actually, the delivery guy, Jack Reacher- he’s my secret liaison to my other companies.” Buddy confessed with a wince but when Violet giggled he breathed out a breath of relief.

“Hiding in plain sight, I like it. That’ll make it easy, I can claim I need him to deliver stuff and mail stuff through him myself. Whatever I mail, will it still get delivered?” Violet asked.

“Yeah, it’s just the shipping labels that he intercepts but the packages themselves are benign.” Buddy assured her.

“Then I need to have some serious and very steady correspondence with The Agency about my replacement and their training then and nothing is more reliable than actual hard copy paper, a proper paper trail.” Violet insisted as she begrudgingly started to let go of him and regain some semblance of personal space.

“When my friends come to visit me, would you want to hang out with us?” Buddy asked.

“Would I be the only girl with a group of guys?” Violet asked.

“Nope, because I’m going to be extending the invitation to their wives and families.” Buddy revealed.

“Then yes, I’d love to come. Can I bring anything?” Violet asked hopefully.

“Just yourself.” Buddy answered with a subtle shake of his head.

“Wine it is then.” Violet giggled before she let down the forcefield.

“Thank you for helping me calm down. You really are a big, tall, pine tree that’s a refuge. At least for me.” Violet praised.

“And I’ll happily be that for you for as long as you want me to.” Buddy answered with a fond grin before she took another step and kissed his cheek sweetly that melted Buddy right where he stood.

“Thank you. Now, let’s get back to business before Phillip loses his goddamn mind not being able to see me for more than a minute.” Violet urged as she straightened up and left the bathroom before she made a pained sound because all the cameras and listening devices were turned up to the maximum level as she subconsciously held her stomach.

“Woah you ok?” Buddy asked.

“Yeah, just a wave of nausea because they’re turned up.” Violet answered as she managed to get to the counter and thankfully once she was able to move forward she could feel them start to turn down again.

“Ok, so um about your personal social visit, who exactly do you want to come?” Violet began before Buddy gave her the names of all his friends and their wives and their kids names and their phone numbers and email addresses and how to best get a hold of them which Violet dutifully got and notated.

“OK, I’ll get started on all of this. See you again this evening Mr. Pine, good luck with your projects.” Violet urged him as she went back to her office to do her makeup for the third time that day as she put in all the information into her computer before Phillip came back into her office.

“Hey, you changed your makeup again.” Phillip noticed.

“Yeah, I had to.” Violet answered as Phillip simply hummed in pretensive befuddlement.

“Were you able to watch what happened in Mr. Pine’s lab?” Violet asked after a beat.

“No, did something happen?” Phillip lied which caused Violet to clench her jaw.

“Well, Mr. Pine noticed that I was upset and when he asked me about it, I had a panic attack and ended up locking both of us into his bathroom and he was inside the bubble when I couldn’t help but put it up and it took all of Mr. Pine’s wits to get me calmed down and for me to feel safe enough to let down the forcefield.” Violet answered.

“What...why? I thought I was able to help with that before you left.” Phillip questioned.

“You did. But Phillip…” Violet started as she felt tears prick her eyes again.

“I’m just having a bad day. That’s all there is to it.” Violet insisted as she tried to refocus and keep her emotions in check.

“No, I don’t believe that. Come on Violet, you can tell me.” Phillip pleaded as he pushed his comfort onto her and she immediately bolted to get some space as she clutched her stomach again and figured now was as good as any to use this to her advantage.

“Phillip, something is wrong with me. I’m becoming paranoid and suicidal. Like when we were in Vegas and you did that coke and you thought you could fly and those hookers tried to help you- I had to fight so hard not to jump off the balcony myself. I don’t understand it, maybe it’s the pressure or something.” Violet said and saw Phillip’s eyes widen in horror just a little before he tried to school his expression again.

“But I feel like I’m being watched and listened to everywhere I go, even in my own apartment and it’s like I can sense little trackers in all my devices and they make me feel so much dread or listening devices- it’s like they ring in my ears and make me so nauseous. I’ve been trying so hard to keep this to myself because I know it sounds crazy and insane but Phillip, I’ve been battling this ever since I started working with you and it started off small at first, but the more I do this job and the closer I am to you and give into my feelings for you, the worse I feel and the worse it feels, I’m throwing up all the time and I can feel the enamel wear on my teeth and the psychic was right, I’m an emerald in a setting that’s too tight, I’m cracking under the pressure. And something about that jewelry you tried to give me this morning, it felt like it was just crawling in... spiders. It just makes me feel like everything is crawling with spiders and it makes my skin literally crawl like they’re climbing all over me. Like I get it that there’s cameras and listening devices here, for security, they have to be and I’ve gotten used to it, like seeing a spider web in the corner and pretending to ignore it as long as it doesn't come down or get close to you or like putting on an itchy sweater but you endure it because you’re at Grandma’s house but...I feel like I can never get away from them, that they’re all over everything I touch and it’s that- that makes what she said about the setting being too tight make so much sense, but I just couldn’t find the right words to tell you but I’ve been so scared of telling you because I didn’t want you to think you were in danger of a crazy person or doubt me that I couldn’t keep you safe or anything and for some reason when Buddy gave me this necklace, this is the first thing that I’ve been given that is spider free and the longer I wear it, the less the spiders crawl on me and I feel like you’re the center of the spider web for some reason and none of this makes sense but I have no idea how else to explain it. And I feel like if I keep pushing myself to be everything you need to be, I’ll break, I’ll shatter and never get put back together again. And the more I feel it, the more I feel, that even as much as you pay me- it’s not worth it . And my gut used to whisper things to me but all it does is scream at me anymore to save myself and just walk away and I just...I want to be in a space that’s spider free. And I want to hit every electronic around me with a hammer to squish the spiders. And I know this is crazy. And I feel like if I just kill myself, the spiders will just eat me and be done with it.” Violet managed to rant as she paced her office on the opposite side of the room as Phillip withdrew all of his powers from her and knew without the shadow of a doubt that this was all because of him. He was the one responsible for cracking her and he had thought he had taken out the suicide seed from her head but apparently not, the seed was sprouting on it's own or enough of it remained to do this to her. And that if he didn’t back off, she really was going to break beyond mending. He needed to fix this.

“And what’s even crazier- is I feel like Mr. Pine is just a big can of Raid. And the more I’m around him and closer to him I am, the farther away the spiders stay. And that’s why I’ve been wanting to do all the outings with him because at least when I’m with him, the spiders stay away. And he even invited me to stay as a friend for his social event and I totally want to but not when his place is crawling with spiders too. Phillip, I know this sounds crazy and if you want to commit me to an asylum, I’ll understand. I mean I’ll break out and disappear forever, but I would understand and forgive you.” Violet said as she let her shoulders drop in defeat and hugged herself as pure panic and a deep dreadful, foreboding fear gripped Phillip’s chest.

“Uh, then. Then you should do just that. I’m so sorry Violet, I’m so sorry, I wish you would have told me sooner. I never wanted…” Phillip began to cry but he did his best to keep his composure.

“You’re not crazy Violet. You’re just under too much pressure and I’ve put too much stress and pressure on you and I've asked too much of you and I am so, so, so sorry. You poor thing. You make so much sense right now. I get it, ok, um, I’m gonna do all I can to kill the spiders for you. Just...I’m approving everything for you and Mr. Pine, of course you should go, and don’t worry about going as Ms. Parr or Invisigirl. Just go as Violet. Go, have a great time, I’ll have your place searched and scrubbed to make sure it’s spider free or if you still think it has spiders, I’ll get you another apartment that’s spider free. I’ll get you new everything because if you feel it’s all infested with spiders, then they’re beyond saving. You are not crazy. You’re so strong and brave for trying to put up with all this. And while you’re there, I’ll turn off all the cameras and listening devices in the apartment side of the space, just in case that’s what’s giving you spider vibes. Because you deserve to have a nice evening with friends without feeling your skin crawl and get them like a case of wine or whatever as my gift for the occasion and just have a great time. Just keep Wednesday as your Raid day. And you know what, if Mr. Pine will host you or you want to host him and take him out- have the weekends too. have Raid weekends. And go out, like to the museums or whatever. Leave the security detail here. I trust you with Mr. Pine and I trust that if he makes a move, you’ll still do your job. It’s the least I can do.” Phillip generously offered before Violet practically ran into his arms and was so grateful when she felt that he didn’t use his powers at all.

“Thank you so much Phil, thank you for believing me and doing something about it. You have no idea how much that means to me.” Violet cried in relief into his chest as he held her.

“Of course. I’m always going to believe you. I need to protect you as much as you protect me. And if I have to kill a million spiders both real or otherwise, I’ll do it. You are the most important thing and the most precious jewel in the universe and I’m so sorry I couldn’t see that I was the one causing the cracks by putting so much pressure on you and asking too much of you. Thank you so much for telling me and identifying the problem. I’ll help as much as I can.” Phillip vowed.

“Thank you.” Violet thanked him before kissing him sweetly, wishing she could have kissed Buddy instead.

“Ok, let me go and call some exterminators and brainstorm to make a trap for any more.” Phillip offered before he left and went to the tech department and turned off all the cameras and listening devices in her apartment and her car and her phone and Violet simply grinned when she could tell they had been turned off as she took a moment to hold her phone between her hands and mentally searched for it and was still able to find it. It was still there, just dormant. Sleeping . Before she played with it, focused on the device and turned it back on and then back off again and smiled to herself that she was good enough to figure out how to do it and could now do it on demand.

Meanwhile the mole in security sent the message that Violet was aware of the bugs and that Phillip was going to go and exterminate her bug problem and to make sure that the only bugs he would find would be his own and within 30 minutes, Zone’s security team came back to Violet’s place and took out all of the piggy backs and covered up all the evidence that they were ever there to begin with and quickly left again.

#Why So Jaded #Why So Jaded Chapter 7 #Synlet #Buddy Pine #Bartholomew Pine #Violet Parr #Corporate espionage AU #Modern AU #Now #this is a proper love triangle #and some good ol fashioned intrigue #and conflicts of interest #and being emotionally torn between objectives #and a test of loyalties #bwahahaha

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noramoya · 4 years

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MICHAEL JACKSON, BLACK SUPERHERO: African-American Artists And Intelectuals, From Jay-Z To Henry Louis Gates, Weight In On Jackson’s Legacy.

“When Michael Jackson was a boy, you didn’t have to say “black is beautiful,” you just had to look at him and you knew. In 1969, as black people were getting comfortable with the idea that African features are gorgeous, he arrived as the perfect punctuation of that idea. He was cherubic with his rich brown skin, a broad nose and a big halo of curls atop his head at a time when the Afro was a powerful symbol of black pride. “People responded viscerally to Michael Jackson’s beauty,” says Harvard professor Henry Louis Gates Jr. 1969 was a year after the assassination of Dr. Martin Luther King Jr., a time when the black-power and civil rights movements seemed to be disintegrating, but Michael showed up, a soul-music prodigy irrepressibly optimistic and bursting with youthful enthusiasm. “Here was a child who clearly understood the R&B idiom,” says music-industry veteran Gary Harris. “He was some sort of test-tube creation from a mad soul doctor’s lab. If Diana Ross and Stevie Wonder had a child, it would have been Michael Jackson.”

He quickly became the number-one black child star of his era, and of all time. The first four Jackson 5 singles each topped Billboard‘s Hot 100, an unbelievable start. Black people fell in love so hard, he became more than an artist and more like a member of the family. You didn’t want anything to happen to him so much that you felt protective the way you did about a younger brother. “He was ours,” says Q-Tip. “He meant everything to black culture.”

It wasn’t just about Michael. A few years after the Johnson administration declared the black family broken with the Moynihan Report, the Jackson family was large, intact, vibrant, successful and seemingly happy, giving America an idealized image of domestic bliss. Jay-Z told me he grew up pretending to be Michael, singing alongside his two older sisters and brother. “Here you had Michael and four brothers,” says the Rev. Al Sharpton, “all talented and all cute and the strong father and the mother who was matriarchal and Janet, and it was like, ‘Wow, all this talent in this family, showing we could do something.’ We were proud of that.”

Michael had a second family: Motown was a deeply trusted brand in millions of black households. If Berry Gordy said it was good enough to release, you could bet it was great. The Jackson 5 were the last great act to come out of the Detroit label, further proof of Malcolm Gladwell’s theory in ‘Outliers: The Story of Success’, that life timing is critical to success, that the historical forces swirling around the moment when you emerge can make all the difference. “The Jacksons were the first family in line to truly benefit from the post-civil-rights era with America’s new open-arms policy toward black entertainment,” says ?uestlove. “1969 was the year the social floodgates opened and an 11-year-old led the charge in post-Malcolm/Martin/Motown America. Historians always forget the third-most-important M to help black America get access to the promised land is Motown

Thriller came out at the end of 1982, as the affirmative-action generation was beginning to make its move. Jesse Jackson would make a bid for the presidency, Eddie Murphy would launch his assault on the top layers of Hollywood, Oprah Winfrey would start her legendary talk show, and Bill Cosby would create the best-rated sitcom of the decade. Even before all that started, the vibe of black ascensionism was in the air, and Michael saw no reason why race should hold him back from the most elite level of his profession. He decided to ride his excellence to the zenith. Current Motown president Sylvia Rhone says, “Throughout his career, his success dramatically affected my view of what was possible and open for African-Americans.”

Many blacks now compare Michael with Barack Obama – perhaps the highest possible compliment in black America. Not only are they both integrationists and racial harmonists, but they both were determined to reach the top while refusing to let race hold them back. “There’s so many components of why Barack Obama is president,” says Diddy, “and Michael Jackson is one of them. He started a change in the perception of the African-American male on a worldwide level: his strength, always putting himself in a power position, being seen as a hero.” Sharpton echoes the point. “Way before Tiger Woods or Barack Obama, Michael made black people go pop-culture global,” he says. “You had people in France, South America and Iowa comfortable with their kids imitating a black kid from Gary, Indiana. And when some of those people in Iowa grew, they were comfortable with voting for Barack Obama because they got comfortable imitating a black kid named Michael Jackson when they were young. Obama is a phenomenon, but he’s the result of a process that Michael helped America graduate to.”

Michael was also a boardroom killer. In the decades before him, black recording artists were, as James Brown observed, in the show but not in show business. Many ended up losing the copyrights to their own songs and pocketing a fraction of the money their music brought in. Jackson knew all about that history. “He knew Berry Gordy made his money off copyrights,” cultural critic Nelson George says. “He knew the value of songs. That’s something he understood.” In 1984, when the ATV music-publishing catalog, which contained 251 Beatles songs, including “Yesterday,” “Let It Be” and “Hey Jude,” as well as work from Bob Dylan, went up for sale, Jackson went after it. After 10 months of negotiation, Jackson purchased the catalog for $47.5 million. His stake is now worth more than 10 times that, and the move was easily his shrewdest business conquest – and the asset that kept him afloat during his financially troubled last years. It proved his savvy, separating him from all those previous black artists who lacked the power to control the music business. But more than that, the symbolic power of Jackson owning the Beatles’ music cannot be overstated. Not only did he become as big as the Beatles, he bought them too. A century after American whites owned blacks, a black performer owned the product of the most elite white group in the world. It was an amazing turnabout, and one blacks took special pride in. A few nights after Jackson died, I was in L.A., searching the radio for an MJ song, when I came across “Strawberry Fields Forever” on an oldies station. I said, “Fuck it, Mike owns this. Same difference.” And I listened.

By the Nineties, Jackson no longer looked like a black person – after a series of surgeries, his facial features and skin color had become more and more Caucasoid. George says, “I don’t think there was any question: There was disquiet in the black community about the color thing. It was an issue. People didn’t wanna go out and say, ‘He’s fuckin’ becoming white,’ but people were like, ‘What’s that about?'” As Jackson was literally assimilating, we struggled with his choices but never symbolically tossed him out of the race, even though he seemed to be trying to surgically remove himself from it. “The reason black folk never turned their backs on him,” says Georgetown professor Michael Eric Dyson, “is because we realized he was merely acting out on his face what we collectively have been tempted to do in our souls: whitewash the memory and trace of our offending blackness.” Still, we struggled to understand why. Some have said he no longer wanted to see his father in the mirror, but there seem to be deeper forces at play. “I think he wanted to be a symbol of universalism,” Gates says, “and he erroneously thought his skin color, hair texture, the length of his nose and shape of his chin inhibited that. You could say he was appealing to the universal, but there’s no way of escaping, even giving him the benefit of the doubt, that it’s a function of Negro self-hatred and self-loathing, which is a function of slavery, Jim Crow, segregation and racism, which made blacks hate the very things that make them beautiful.”

Those who knew Jackson well say he wasn’t trying to surgically remove himself from the race. Producer Teddy Riley, who worked on Jackson’s Dangerous album, says, “Of course he loved being black. We’d be in sessions where we’d just vibe out and he’d say, ‘We are black, and we are the most talented people on the face of the Earth.’ I know this man loved his culture, he loved his race, he loved his people.” Questlove adds, “As a fellow child of a taskmaster, no one knows self-distorted insecurity like I do. A person ashamed of his roots would never have made a gazillion odes to Africa as he’s done.” And even as his face got whiter, his music stayed black and rooted in the R&B tradition he mastered as a kid.”

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theolddarkmachine · 5 years

Text

Four Years- Victory Lap

It’s his first year of college, and Takashi Shirogane understands many, many things.

He understands the extreme value theorem they’re currently covering in his 8am calculus class, and Rolle’s theorem that it helps to prove.

He understands the basic theories of astrophysics, and how they’ll apply to, hopefully, his future in astronautics.

He even understands fluid mechanics theory, even if just barely.

But what he doesn’t understand, is the boy with the night pitch hair, and eyes colored like dark amethyst. More specifically, he doesn’t quite understand his burning look that only seems to linger on him, even an hour removed from their game.

Which, he’d lost.

That’s another thing he doesn’t quite understand.

Though, maybe that’s just the alcohol talking.

Part 5 of 5

AO3

Tags: Shiro POV, All Four Years Wrapped Into One Neat Chapter, NSFW no really, this chapter only exists to write the sex scene i didnt get to fit in senior year lol

A/N: SURPRISE! Bet y’all thought I was gone, huh? help me its been.... a rough month to say the least lol Anyway, hope this last bit of the Frat AU is worth the hellish wait I put y’all through!

Also, please excuse any scientific/mathematical inaccuracies. I have but one brain cell, Google, and a science friend who tried her best.

***************************

It’s his first year of college, and Takashi Shirogane understands many, many things.

He understands the extreme value theorem they’re currently covering in his 8am calculus class, and Rolle’s theorem that it helps to prove.

He understands the basic theories of astrophysics, and how they’ll apply to, hopefully, his future in astronautics.

He even understands fluid mechanics theory, even if just barely.

Which, he’d lost.

That’s another thing he doesn’t quite understand.

Though, maybe that’s just the alcohol talking.

“He hates me,” the alcohol also talks, as Shiro stares into the abyss that is the Beta house’s backyard.

“Who hates you?” Lance asks from beside him, voice bored as he lets his gaze roam over the party. Something at the edge of the alcohol blur in his mind tells him Lance doesn’t quite care, but he humors him anyway.

He’s a good friend, Shiro thinks, dropping his back against the slightly greened fence behind him and groans.

“Him,” he says, emphasizing the word as if it clears anything up at all. It doesn’t seem to, if the thick sound of Lance’s silence is anything to go by.

Growling lowly, his grip tightens around his half emptied cup of mystery punch.

Which, with the way the backyard is fuzzed at its edges and the way his skin is running hot, he probably shouldn’t be drinking.

That, he could dispute with himself in the morning though.

“Him,” Shiro repeats, nodding his head toward the deck. There are several people there, all faded and fuzzed together in a conglomeration of Betas that he doesn’t know, save for one.

One with that dark, wavy hair, and that cutting gaze that Shiro can’t seem to shake.

Keith.

His name is Keith.

Keith Kogane.

From his 8am calculus class, and very possibly, his dreams.

“Dude, too much,” Lance groans in response, slight disgust filling his tone as Shiro realizes he didn’t just think those words. Scrubbing a hand at his nape, he smiles in sheepish apology just as Lance turns his attention toward the deck.

“Are you sure he hates just you?” He continues, arching a brow as he tilts his chin toward the scene before them.

“What does that mean?” Shiro asks, confusion lemon bright on his tongue as he turns back to the deck in time to watch Keith nod at something the bleary stranger beside him said. Whatever it is, it irons out his scowl into something more of a drawn line that makes Shiro’s chest hollow with something just shy of jealousy.

Which is just ridiculous since he’s only ever spoken to Keith the one time, and it was while he decimated him at flip cup.

It must just be the alcohol talking, Shiro thinks to himself as he turns back to Lance.

“You know,” he says, gesturing to his face, “the bitch face. It doesn’t look like he really likes anyone.”

“It’s not a bitch face,” Shiro says, ignoring the defensiveness of his tone as he turns his attention back to his classmate. Dipping behind the rim of his red plastic cup, he sucks mystery punch between his teeth as his gaze catches Keith’s hardened exterior crack and buckle beneath the weight of a smile aimed directly at his companion.

He almost chokes as the curve of it sinks deep into the meat of his chest.

“Or not,” Lance mutters, flicking his look back and forth between Shiro and the deck with what looks almost like pity.

It’s then, that Keith chooses to turn away from his friend, sweeping his eyes across the yard and meeting his with a bright spark. Breath seizing, Shiro watches in what feels like slow motion as his smile drops, followed quickly by his gaze before he turns away completely.

Beside him, there’s a sharp inhale and a low ‘oh’ as Lance reaches up and drops a warm palm on his shoulder.

“Sorry buddy,” he says, squeezing his fingers slightly in what Shiro can only assume is meant to be reassurance, but feels much more like pity as he feels his stomach drop low.

“There’s a slim chance he maybe hates.”

They both watched as Keith dipped close to his friend, saying something before pushing into the crowd of bodies on the deck without waiting for his answer. His retreat burns almost as much as the last bit of punch that Shiro sucks down after he can no longer see his dark waves moving in the thrush.

His head spins a big with the alcohol as it roils in his stomach, combining with a noxious mix of yearning.

“But don’t worry,” Lance says brightly, words slightly smushed at their edges as he slides his hand from his shoulder just to smack Shiro on the back. It makes his teeth click against the cheap plastic of his cup and spills punch down his chin as he pulls the cup away. Wiping up the liquid with the back of his hand, he turns to face the other pledge.

Lance’s smile is dangerous as he continues to speak.

“You’ve got Lover Boy Lance here! I’ll help you get the guy!”

It’s an offer, wrapped inside a very terrible idea, which is another thing that Shiro understands. Lover Boy Lance was nothing more than a moniker that Lance had given himself, and nothing good ever came from self proclamations such as that.

But there’s something about the confidence that he exudes that makes him consider.

Looking Lance over, Shiro hears himself say “I’m listening,” before he can think it over further, which only makes Lance’s grin grow wider.

It’s truly, a terrible idea to trust him.

Yet, in that moment, it doesn’t sound all that terrible at all.

Of course, maybe that’s just the alcohol talking.

It’s his second year of college, and Takashi Shirogane has begun to understand many, many more things.

He understands the second law of thermodynamics, and how the change of entropy is equal to heat transfer divided by temperature.

He also understands that the entropy and environment of a system remain constant as long as the process can be reversed.

He even understands how the entropy and environment must, and will, increase if it’s irreversible.

What Shiro understands, is thermodynamics.

But what he doesn’t understand, is how he ever thought listening to any of Lance’s advice was a good idea, because now, he was certain he was closer to accidentally leading Keith to an early alcohol induced grave than actually getting to know him.

Of course, he hadn’t quite expected Keith to actually take him up on the offer to join him for a drink, or to actually go along with the game.

Of course, now that he thought about it, he should have known Keith wouldn’t be able to say no to kicking his ass at a game.

“Come on, Keith, we’re almost there,” Shiro says low, more to himself than to Keith as he tightens his hold around his waist.

It’s only half of a truth.

They aren’t quite almost there, but they have made it halfway down Greek row, which was much more progress than they’d had about twenty minutes ago when he’d found himself holding Keith’s hair back as he dry heaved in front of the Alpha Chi house.

Take that, Alphas, Keith had huffed, voice scratchy and raw from his efforts as he’d stared at the fraternity house with an odd mix of fascination and fire in his gaze. It’d turned his glare brilliant, and scorched, before he’d turned that very same look to him.

Something about it had made it intoxicating in a way that had gone straight to Shiro’s head, more so than the shots had.

Why do you hate us so much? He had asked, unable to look away from the incendiary stare.

Why do you hate me so much, he had meant.

I don’t hate you, Keith had replied, throwing emphasis on ‘you’ as he’d stabbed a finger to the center of Shiro’s chest before turning his attentions back to the house. The yellow of the street light standing guard over them had almost made his cheeks look flushed as he’d contemplated the simple brick of its walls.

His mouth had turned down in a half-hearted scowl before he said with entirely different inflection, I hate you.

It didn’t make sense in the slightest, yet Shiro had laughed then, loud and unrestrained, as Keith had looked back to him for just long enough for the scowl to flick upwards in a barely there facsimile of a smile.

And then, he had ducked forward to throw up on Shiro’s shoes.

He tried not to think too hard about the cooling warmth that’s seeped into his socks now, as Keith continues to ramble, sending his blurred words up toward the night sky.

“You know about stars?” He asked as he let his head lull to the side lazily to find Shiro’s shoulder. Never faltering in his steps, Keith continues his obedient shuffle while keeping his eyes turned upward.

“I’d like to think so,” Shiro chuckles, training his focus on keeping them both moving in some semblance of a straight line, and not the sharp profile of Keith’s face.

“They make up everything,” Keith continues, not paying him any mind. “I’m a star. You’re a star.”

Pausing, he pulls away to look at Shiro, filling the space between them with expectation.

His gaze cuts as he waits, silent in his inquiry as Shiro furrows his brow.

Biting deep into the meat of his lip, he pulls them both over the curb in front of the Beta house.

“We’re all stars?” Shiro guesses.

Satisfied with his answer, Keith nods before dropping his head back to his shoulder as Shiro continues to pull both their weights up the front steps of the porch.

“Keith, do you have your keys?” He asks, giving him another squeeze to make sure he hasn’t fallen asleep standing against him. It earns his nothing more than a disbelieving scoff as Keith shoves a hand into the depths of his front pocket.

Shiro can practically hear his eyes rolling, accompanied with the metallic click of keys.

“Of course I do,” he says, pulling them free and holding them straight out, never once pulling away from where he leans against him.

“If you leave your keys, you get party pickup duty. Never leave your keys,” Keith continues to mumble as Shiro grabs for them, swallowing down the buzz that rocks though him as their fingertips brush.

It stings through him in an entirely different way than the burning line that Keith presses against his side, and Shiro feels his mouth go dry before he squeezes his fist around the metal. The sharp stab of the keys forces him back down to Earth, and the Beta porch as he shifts through the sparse offering to find the key marked with a β.

The lock clicks quietly as he makes quick work of it. Inside, it’s silent, and dark, the house nothing more than an abandoned husk as it awaited its occupants to return.

“Which way to your room?” Shiro whispers, gently closing the door behind them.

Something about the peace of the house begs for his own quiet. It’s almost as if there’s a spell cast over the brick and mortar, and he finds himself scared of breaking it.

Humming lowly, Keith waves a hand vaguely toward the stairs in answer.

“Up and left,” is all he supplies before turning his face into Shiro’s collar.

His breath is hot, collecting in the fabric of his shirt in a way that sears down to his core as he continues their awkward shuffle up the stairs, dutifully following his simple instructions.

Passing a couple of doors, it isn’t until they’re in front of the second to last that Keith makes a small sound and pulls toward it, effectively stopping them both as he pushes it open clumsily.

Behind the plain door, stands Keith’s room.

It’s spartan in its furnishings, with a bed adorned by a thick black comforter, and a desk that sits in front of a single window. Closing the door behind them, Shiro catches sight of the dresser that sits behind it.

Atop it, sits Keith’s Beta Theta pledge paddle, a couple of crumpled dollars, and a sheathed knife.

They’re the only personal touches in the room, and Shiro finds himself reaching out to them, as if they might reveal something of Keith.

A sharp sound sticks itself in Shiro’s throat as Keith pulls away quickly. The motion of it drags him along, making him trip over his feet as he makes his way towards his bed.

Humming happily, Keith lands with a soft squeak of mattress springs as he starts to kick his shoes off, eyes lidded as he reached back at his comforter to push it down. Sitting there, he looks impossibly soft, swathed in the moonlight that’s pressing through his blinds.

Electricity turns Shiro’s veins to live wires as he steps back.

“Do you have any Tylenol?” He asks, turning away in hopes of quelling the heartbeat drumming in his ears. Waving his hand once more in the direction of the desk, Keith makes a noncommittal sound as he starts to pull at his jacket.

Quickly closing the distance between himself and the desk, Shiro traces his gaze over the papers that are scattered over its surface. His writing is a scratch across the white sheets, and on the topmost page, there’s a doodle of an odd creature that decorates the margins.

It’s looks like it would be a caterpillar, if caterpillars had beaks and didn’t look much like caterpillars at all.

Biting down on his laugh, Shiro shakes his head as he opens the top drawer of the desk, eyeing a small white bottle in its corner. With a quick shake, he frees two pills before dropping it back into the drawer with rattling sound before grabbing for a cup that sits on the window sill behind the desk.

It looks relatively clean, and given the circumstance, he figures Keith won’t particularly mind even if it was.

There’s a soft grunt behind him, pulling his attention back toward him long enough to catch him still struggling with his jacket. Moonlight stripes the leather, and falls in his hair, tangling in the waves and turning them to midnight water.

He’s a vision, painted in darkness and sharp lines of light, and it takes everything in Shiro to turn away to make his way to the door tucked in the corner of the room. Throwing it open, he finds himself at the threshold of a small half bathroom.

Turning on the light, he finds himself before a porcelain sink and the oval mirror that hangs above it.

Shiro’s reflection stares back at him, eyes shining bright and pink spilling across his cheeks in an embarrassing way. With a small sound of indignation, he pulls his stare away before he can think too hard about the reason behind the flush that is decidedly not the alcohol before filling the cup.

Then, quickly turning on his heel, he returned to Keith.

Still sitting where he’s left him, only with the addition of his shoes and jacket on the ground, he watches Shiro closely. Keith’s eyes are cutting and clear, like a predator, and he wonders silently if he’s somehow sobered in the matter of seconds that he was gone.

Frozen beneath his stare, Shiro tightens his grip on the cup as Keith slowly tilts his head as he carefully scrutinizes him. It turns the night air thick, and hot, and it catches in his throat.

He thinks he even might choke on it before Keith’s eyes start to shudder shut, effectively pulling the breath from his lungs with a relieved sigh.

Stepping closer, he drops the pills and cup onto his nightstand.

“Why?” Keith asks breathily, not bothering to open his eyes.

Shiro wonders if he’s even talking to him, or just some phantom he sees in his dreams.

“I told you,” Shiro answers anyway, gently pressing a palm over his heart as he grabs for the comforter with the other, holding it back for him as Keith lets himself be pushed down into his pillows.

“You’re my type.”

A sleepy sound of acknowledgement brushes through Keith’s chest before he rolls to his side as Shiro pulls the blanket over him. Pressing himself closer into the pillows, he clutches at the comforter and smiles the smallest brush of a smile.

“Thanks,” he mutters around a yawn.

It takes all of three breaths before they’ve evened into the cadence of sleep that rises and falls softly beneath the sea of his blanket. Shaking his head slowly, Shiro grabs a sheet of paper and a pen from his desk before returning to the nightstand to jot out a quick note.

Take this, and learn how to hold your liquor :)

The blue ink stands stark on the white of the page, the marks each weighted with the same emotion that sits heavy on his tongue with the rest of what he wishes to add.

Instead, he drops the pen beside the note.

Turning away from Keith’s sleeping form, he almost makes it to the door when he sees a small plastic trash can beside it.

There’s another small sound, almost like a sigh, as Shiro grabs for it before turning back to see Keith’s face twitch with a near smile. Dropping it on the ground before him, the plastic is much louder against the hardwood, and it makes him shift slightly in his sleep.

“Shiro,” Keith says lowly, pulling the comforter up further over his chin. The sound of his name on his tongue, shortened with familiarity, crackles in his nerves as he reaches a shaking hand forward to brush a lock of hair from Keith’s cheek.

The lingering buzz of alcohol in his veins is what pushes him forward as he brushes his lips over the crest of it.

“Goodnight, Keith,” he whispers, his breath ghosting across Keith’s cheek before he fully stands.

The quiet sound of a returned goodnight follows him as he turns to leave, heating his skin until he’s certain he’ll burn.

In their class, they were given an example of irreversible thermodynamics. When a hot object meets a cold object, they may both reach a maintained equilibrium temperature, but once pulled apart, they would never naturally return to their original temperatures.

Their combining leaves them changed.

As he shut the door behind him, careful to ensure it only makes the barest sound of a click as it fully closes, he can’t help but think of that example.

Swiping a hand over his tired eyes, he pushes himself down the hall and toward the staircase that would lead him directly to the front door of the Beta house. It isn’t until he’s outside that he tries to swallow a bitter laugh as he drops his head back to look up at the sky.

As it turned out, he may understand the irreversibility of the second law of thermodynamics a little too well.

It’s his third year of college, and Takashi Shirogane understands much, and yet nothing at all.

This much he learns half naked and stretched across a sticky bar table, with the hot line Keith has licked across his stomach cooling on his skin, and the sight of his retreating back before him.

He’d thought he’d finally understood the way Keith felt.

Thought he’d understood where they both stood on a precipice of shared flirtation and nothing more. Shiro was ready to die on that hill. If that was all Keith wanted to give him, he was more than happy to accept it.

There were worse ways to go.

But it was then, trapped between the heat of Keith’s chest and the strength of his grasp at his nape, that he realized maybe he hadn’t understood anything at all.

“Dude,” Lance says, drawing the word out until it’s painfully long before turning to Shiro. “What did you do?”

“I didn’t—” Shiro starts, staring out into the crowd that slowly folds back around the space that Keith had disappeared through.

I didn’t do anything, he means to say, but it sticks in his throat as he flips quickly through the mental photo album of the day. Nothing sticks out as extraordinary. From the start of the day, to just moments before, the only difference, was Keith.

Keith coming forward.

Keith, with that look in his eyes and that confident smirk.

Keith, and the sinful way his tongue had played across his skin.

Keith, Keith, Keith.

The answer comes to him, whole hearted and with all the force of a tank, and it crushes him beneath the weight of understanding.

“I didn’t do anything.” Shiro breathes out the realization, panic bright in his eyes as he looks to Lance. Gaze going wide, Lance shifts his attention between his friend and the crowd around them, almost in search.

Back and forth.

Back and—

Exhaling loudly, Lance keeps his look on Shiro as he speaks.

“I’m not going to lie, buddy. I don’t get it,” he says, anticlimactic and with a measured shrug. Alcohol spills over Lance’s fingers as he raises the hand holding his shot, cutting off Shiro before he can push words through the open gape of his mouth.

The liquid drips from Lance’s hand and onto his leg, seeping into the denim in wet drops.

“It being you,” Lance continues, bringing the shot glass to his lips and dipping his head back with it before resurfacing with a shit eating grin. “Looks like he doesn’t hate you half as much as you thought he did.”

“You also thought he hated me,” Shiro points out, gaze sticking to the crowd like wallpaper in an attempt to avoid his friend’s stare.

It’s my all seeing stare, Lance had once said before demonstrating. At the time, Shiro had laughed so hard, he’d snorted beer from his nose because it looked a lot less all seeing, and much more like he’d just smelled the gnarliest shit.

Now though, Shiro isn’t too sure Lance couldn’t see down to his very core.

Swallowing thickly, he tries to settle the quick pace of his heart as it beats a harrowed rhythm into his ribs and sends fissures through the bone as he aches.

“We’re not talking about me, we’re talking about you,” Lance snarks, shoving an accusatory finger into the fault line at the center of his chest.

“He did,” Shiro breathes, closing his fist at his side as if he’s clutching on a lifeline, “he does.”

Clicking his tongue, Lance shakes his head with disapproval as he quickly pours another shot. Its smell is noxious, and it burns Shiro’s nose as Lance waves the glass beneath it in offering.

“You sure about that?” He questions, cocking a challenging eyebrow in Shiro’s direction.

Yes, he wants to answer. It’s what he would answer if Lance had asked it of him the year prior.

Or even the week prior.

Hell, it’s what he would have answered that morning when Keith had shot him that sharpened look from across the field.

Shiro had been so fucking sure that Keith never thought anything of him as more than just a friend. Friend in the loosest sense of the word, but a friend nonetheless.

But now—

The shot glass is cool to the touch as Shiro grabs it. It contrasts sharply with the acidic burn it sends crashing down his throat as he swallows the tequila.

Heated courage twists in his veins when he resurfaces from the crystalline edge, and it goes straight to his head as he drops the now emptied shot on the table behind him.

The Heisenberg Uncertainty Principle suddenly comes to Shiro’s mind as he pushes himself off the table, leaving the sound of confusion behind him as he works his way through the crowd and in the direction that Keith disappeared.

According to Heisenberg, it was impossible to know both the speed and position of a particle. Only one could be known at any given time, as to know one, the other must be stopped.

All this time, Shiro had thought he’d known the speed at which he’d been chasing after Keith. Not quite ever catching up, but keeping him in sight.

Shiro had never considered stopping to see where Keith stood, in fear that he’d lose him.

Knowing both would be greedy, and an impossibility, and yet standing outside the bar’s bathroom, it doesn’t quite feel like an impossibility at all.

Taking a breath, Shiro rests his palm on the wooden door, admiring the chipped black paint as his mind runs over the uncertainty principle as if it’s a life line.

He can’t possibly know both.

But he wants to.

Exhaling, Shiro pushes open the door.

It’s his fourth and final year of college, and Takashi Shirogane thinks he understands all that he really needs to.

He understands nuclear fusion, and how the stars themselves explode in order to manifest everything in existence.

He understands that all the elements around him, and of him, were all born from the death of far gone stars, and he even understands how poetic that sounds, even if it’s just science.

But what Shiro still doesn’t quite understand, is what makes up Keith. Even starlight didn’t seem grand enough to compose the atoms and matter that trekked through him. Keith was something more like the universe, made up of entire solar systems instead of just mere stars.

At least, that’s what Shiro thinks now as Keith’s smile breaks wide and blissful across his face as he lowers himself onto him, a moan parting his teeth before he drops his head back.

“Keith,” Shiro breaths, pushing his palms over his naked thighs before sinking his fingers into the meat of his hips. The touch stalls him with a shudder that brushes through him, his sharp intake a shattering sound in the otherwise quiet room before Keith lifts his head once more to look down at Shiro.

“Yes?” He asks, eyes half lidded and hands hot where he drops his palms to cover the backs of his own.

Like this, Shiro isn’t even sure that the universe could make up the breadth of wonder that Keith carries in his veins.

Nails prick his skin as Keith sucks his bottom lip between his teeth, waiting for some sign or answer.

The sensation of it races to his heart.

“I love you,” Shiro manages, rubbing twin circles at his hipbones before rolling his hips up to steal a gasp from deep within Keith’s chest. His nails cut deeper into Shiro’s skin before he traces his palms down his forearms.

Following the line of his arms toward his shoulders, Keith hovers over him, a thousand lifetimes bright in his eyes as he grinds himself down onto Shiro as if to prove a point.

“I love you,” he echoes.

It makes Shiro whine as Keith continues to move slowly, rolling sinuously against him, his heated skin burning against his own like a solar flare.

Shiro feels his fingers dig further into the meat of Keith’s hips, surely bruising, as he takes his wickedness in. Above him, lit by the soft glow of the street lights through the half open blinds, Keith is nothing but lean muscle and burning ozone; and the smoke of it leaves him on the back of his voice with the small sounds he makes with each steady movement.

He’s so beautiful, Shiro thinks as he arches up into him, chasing the friction of Keith’s rolling hips. The movement presses his head further back into Keith’s pillows, surrounding him with his scent and baring his throat up to the other fraternity president.

A burst of happiness, bright and charring, hooks the edges of his lips upward as he feels the soft slide of Keith’s palm across his collarbone before coming to a rest at the base of his throat.

“I love you,” Keith says again, words hitching as Shiro rolls his hips up into him. Time seems to seize around them then, ground to a halt with the quick suction of air from the room as he finds himself pinned beneath Keith’s half lidded stare.

Something sparks there, deep in his night sky irises as he drags his teeth along the full of his bottom lip, and then gently presses his fingers against either side of his throat.

Everything crashes around them with the near instantaneous rush of Keith’s fingers around his throat, and Keith’s body working down against him, and Keith, Keith—

“Keith,” Shiro rasps, pushing up into his palm as his own run a path back and forth across Keith’s thighs. They travel further and further upward with each pass, but never quite get as high as either of them would like.

“Please.”

He isn’t sure which one of them says it. Honestly, he isn’t sure it matters as his head starts to feel light, and bright stars start to pop in his vision.

With their hips moving together in frantic, staccato motions, Shiro loses himself to the way their bodies move and how the stars tangle in Keith’s hair.

Pushing a palm up from Keith’s hip, Shiro brushes along the line of his flank. It draws a shuddering moan out of him as he continues to move, the fingers around his throat twitching slightly as Shiro’s palm passes over his steadily beating heart.

Continuing his path, he slides his hand up further still until his palm is cupping the side of Keith’s neck, and his fingers curl gently in his hair.

“You’re beautiful,” Shiro breathes before pulling Keith down into a burning kiss that traps the sounds of their shared moans between them.

Each and every one of Keith’s, he notes, tastes like whiskey and starlight.

“Shiro,” Keith gasps into his mouth, hand slipping down to grip at the pillow beneath Shiro’s head in a vain attempt to ground himself as he continues to roll down against him.

It’s too late though.

For both of them.

Shiro wonders if maybe, it always had been, but that was a contemplation to have later as pleasure burns through them both with one final roll of their hips. The proof of it paints between them, coating their skin with ribbons of heat as they ride out the shared orgasm.

The smallest of eternities circles around the room, dipping it in silence only punctuated by their breaths as Shiro holds Keith against him.

It feels right, the way they breathe against each other in the quiet darkness. Almost as if they were both made up of pieces of the same star finally finding the peace of being reunited.

But maybe, that’s just the afterglow talking.

“So what’s next?” Keith asks, low and slow against Shiro’s pulse before pushing himself up. Moving just slightly, he pulls off of him with a small sigh of loss.

Chuckling to himself, Shiro nods down toward where Keith is still perched on his marked stomach.

“I think next we clean up,” he offers with a sharp grin.

His jackass grin, as Keith had deemed it.

“Shut up,” Keith growls playfully as he punches lightly as Shiro’s chest before leaving his closed fist pressed against his heartbeat.

“You know what I mean,” he continues, voice smaller in a way. Almost shy. “Next. After graduation. After—”

He gestures toward the closed door of his room with his other hand—

“—this.”

The future, Keith means.

Shiro wishes he knew. Wishes that, amongst all the things the past four year had helped him to understand, what they were to do next had been one of the them.

“I don’t know,” he answers truthfully, gently grabbing Keith’s hand and pulling it up toward his mouth. Keith’s sigh is soft as he brushes his lips over his knuckles.

“Care to find out with me?”

The streetlight turns Keith’s smile golden as he pulls his hand away and leans down close once more.

“Yeah,” he says, tucking the crescent against the skin of Shiro’s cheek. His answer is a hot puff of breath that rocks down his spine like a lightning strike.

Curling his arms around Keith’s waist, Shiro holds him close as he feels the smile grow.

“Yeah,” he says again, chasing the word with a chaste kiss.

“I think I’d like that.”

*************

#sheith #takashi shirogane #keith kogane #voltron #i wish i had a funny tag to add #i dont #this took a whole lot longer than it needed to #pour one out for the frat au #it will be missed TToTT

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todonintendos · 6 years

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The Genius Behind The Genius

It’s been already eight years since Pokémon Black and White were released for the Nintendo DS. Time sure flies. I think we can all agree that it seems like yesterday. This just comes to prove how big the mark these games have left is, not to mention the amazing sequels we got to play. One of the many reasons why it’s hard to forget these games is their story. In fact, it took over a year to write, and seeing the result, it was definitely worth the time spent.

But what makes up a good story? A decent amount of plot twists and an interesting theme to talk about are good answers, but this time we’ll be focusing in characters. There’s no good story without characters, and turns out Pokémon Black and White has plenty of them. Cheren, Ghetsis, Bianca, Iris, Juniper... the list feels endless. Each of them have their own unique origins, story and behavior... and then there’s N.

N is an anti-villain, since he’s the king of the villainous Team Plasma, but sees Pokémon as his friends and acts nicely towards the player.

When N was very young, he was abandoned in the woods, where he was raised by the Pokémon living there. One day, Ghetsis began taking care of him, claiming to be his father. Actually, it’s still a mystery who N parents are, to the point where Junichi Masuda, the current director of the Pokémon games, even suggested he could have been born from Pokémon. When the player meets N for the first time, N is already over eighteen years old. My guess is that he’s 19, but I’ll go deeper into that theory later.

Despite not having received proper education, his IQ is stated to be extremely high. His mind exceeds any other human mind from the Pokémon world. Junichi Masuda revealed that he can look into people’s past and future. But his most recognized talent is probably his skill with mathematics. He’s a mathematical genius. It’s said that he sees everything in a black and white fashion, and uses mathematical formulas as a way to make sense of it, since being raised by Pokémon prevented him from having our generic vision of the world. This is the exact same reason why he proves to have a closer relationship with Pokémon than humans.

Being a mastermind who was raised by Pokémon, N considers himself a personification of perfection.

Little more needs to be known about N to realize how distinct of a character he is. Nonetheless, N is still a fictional character, and as with any other work of fiction, there’s a real human mind behind it. The creator of the creation and, for N’s case, the genius behind the genius.

That person is, as you may have guessed already, Junichi Masuda himself. The director and lead composer of Pokémon Black and White and their respective sequels. It’s evident that a good character is never born out of nowhere. There’s always a source of inspiration behind it, and maths were definitely the strongest influence around his creation. At plain sight, the references may not seem obvious. But the same way N has a completely different point of view of what we see, we also need to change our perception of N to see them and figure them out.

Junichi Masuda next to Shigeru Ohmori, game designers and directors of many Pokémon games. Both worked on Black and White together.

By simply looking at N’s official artwork from Black and White, the only thing that’s worth talking about is the cube hanging from his belt. Since it doesn’t have any colors other than a dark shade of yellow, it can’t be a Void Cube, a variant of the well-known Rubik’s Cube with a hole in the middle of every face. Instead, we could be talking about the second iteration of a Menger Sponge, but try to remember what I just mentioned about Void Cubes.

Understanding what a Menger Sponge is can be relatively easy. It gets more complex when we try to approach it from a mathematical point of view. First, think of a big cube of infinite dimensions, which turns out to be the first step of the Menger Sequence. Now, split that big cube into 27 smaller cubes of the same dimensions, and remove the cube that’s in the middle of every face and in the very center of the cube. The shape that the 20 remaining cubes form should remind you of the Void Cube I mentioned earlier, and the cube hanging from N’s belt, of course. Now follow the same steps for those 20 cubes, and repeat the process infinitely.

The result is a cube with infinite surface, but zero volume, as it will have an infinite amount of holes. Two different and equally valid points of view for the same concept.

One does not realize how the cube will eventually end up having infinite holes until it’s looked from a mathematical point of view.

The truth is, this cube doesn’t take any major, or even minor role in the story of the games, but early concept artworks and notes suggest that it was initially going to be relevant to the plot of the game. However, if N still wears it in the final games, there has to be a reason for that, and it’s probably because of the fact that no-one will find anything interesting in that cube unless it’s seen from a mathematical point of view, or N’s default point of view.

Moving away from his appearance, one of the things that gets the attention of most people is how he’s named after a single letter: the letter N, which happens to be the letter that’s used to represent the set of all natural numbers, which are all numbers without any decimals starting from zero (zero is not part of that set). In fact, this isn’t just a coincidence, as Junichi Masuda has revealed that N stands for Natural Number. However, if you’ve played through Black and White, you should know that N isn’t his actual name. His full name in every language is Natural Harmonia Gropius. And yes, there’s a mathematical context behind it. Actually, not all of the context has to do with math.

The natural set (N) is the most basic mathematical set, and is contained inside all of the bigger sets (real numbers, rational numbers...)

The first part of his full name, Natural, should be already figured out, and there isn’t much more to explain. However, the next part, his surname Harmonia, can be a little bit harder to understand, so let’s focus first on the last name, Gropius, since it’s not confirmed to have a specific origin. Gropius is a rather popular last name in Germany, and is often associated with Walter Gropius, pioneer of modernistic architecture during the XXth century. This could reference the fact that N wants to build a world where Pokémon and humans can live together in... well, harmony. Though it’s debatable whether this is true or not.

Regarding Harmonia, at first glance, it may seem like it refers to the musical term harmony: combinations of chords that create a pleasant melody. While that point of view is correct, the mathematical point of view we’re focusing on leads us to harmonic functions. I won’t go into detail on what they are because it requires a rather wide knowledge on maths to understand. In fact, we don’t really have to, as this only will help us realize there has to be a relation between music and maths somewhere in N’s development history, and by analyzing the well-known N Battle Theme, we’ll find out how math also influenced this tune.

Harmonic functions are those who have a first and a second derivative that always satisfy Laplace’s equation (df^2/dx(n)^2=0)

The genius we’ve been talking about all this time, Junichi Masuda, was in charge of composing this very specific theme, and states in a post from his personal blog that he was influenced by prime numbers to compose it. But why prime numbers? Masuda defends this idea by considering N as the “one” genius, and implying that prime numbers are the ones who get closer to being as unique as number one, due to the fact that they only have two divisors.

I’ve tried finding a music sheet of N’s Battle Theme so following the song becomes easier, however, I found nothing, which surprises me considering it’s a very popular theme. However, since all of this info comes from Junichi Masuda himself, we can definitely trust on it. As a replacement, here’s a video with the song so you can try to follow along, specially if you’ve got a good musical ear.

youtube

Right at the first part of the song, you can hear several combinations of eight ascending notes. Imagine the lowest note of the eight, which is always the first one of each set, is note #1, and that the number associated to every note increases by one whenever the key of the note also increases by one position. Do this in all of the sets, and you should get the following number combination: (1, 2, 3, 5, 7, 11, 13, 17, 19), which happens to be number one followed by the first seven prime numbers... with seven itself also being a prime number. Also, note that following the definition of prime number, 1 is NOT one of them.

After this intro, several sequences of three notes, with the last note playing for way longer than the other two, can be heard. The fact that it’s three notes isn’t a coincidence since three is a prime number. In music terms, a bar is the segment of time that corresponds to a specific amount of beats stated at the beginning of the music sheet, which is usually four, and the longest note of the three extends for five bars... with five also being a prime number. But this doesn’t end here. This whole theme extends for 83 bars before it begins to loop... and guess what? 83 is also a prime number!

All prime numbers from 1 to 100 appear green on this chart. 1 isn’t a prime number.

We can also find some relations between N and prime numbers on the character itself and not just on his battle theme. For example, in the game, he’s said to be 5′ 11′’ tall. At this point I don’t think I should remind that 5 and 11 are prime numbers, but I’ll do just in case. His trainer ID number in Pokémon Black and White is 00002 (two is the only even prime number). And he’s also the only trainer in Generation V that uses all 17 types of Pokémon at least once during the game. And yes, 17 is also a prime number. Though this info I just mentioned isn’t confirmed, and could be just a coincidence.

Also, there’s much more in N’s Battle Theme other than all of the influence from prime numbers. The clocks ticking in the middle of the song, the sudden bursts of energy... all of these elements aren’t random, and Junichi Masuda explains all of them on his personal blog, so definitely check it out if you’re interested in knowing more about it! https://www.gamefreak.co.jp/blog/dir_english/?m=201110

...and you reached the end of the article!

As you saw, the creativity put into the creation of N is simply insane. People often tend to ignore the development stories of their favourite characters no matter how much they love them, but if you attempt to do a small research to find out, you may end up finding something as surprising as this. Authors and developers care about their characters, to the point where they end up putting all of this effort to make it stand out. Thanks for reading!

~TodoNintendoS, as part of Daily Nintendo Fact #100

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anopenrecord · 6 years

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This is NOT a current case This is a case from 2012, but this is an example of the kinds of legal precedents that have been set and why adoptee activists are deeply concerned many of these kids will not make it back to their families. In this case, the child’s mother was deemed unfit simply for crossing the border. When parents can be deemed unfit for crossing the border, then any child of a migrating parent put into foster care is vulnerable to becoming available for adoption. Once the child is in a foster, pre-adoptive, or adoptive home for awhile, the slope becomes even slicker.

The general scenario goes like this: Child is removed, placed in foster (or adoptive) home, family of origin is undocumented or incarcerated or working to meet requirements for reunification, system sees fit to terminate parental rights or the process to reunification is so long and arduous that kid is raised by adoptive or foster family for awhile, family of origin tries to regain custody and a case is made for it being in the best interests of the child to stay where they have been in their "loving, stable" (typically white and middle class) home. Birth/first parents are almost always criminalized and demonized as immoral and unfit. In this case, they said the fact that the mother was "smuggling" her child over the border alone proves that she can't provide a stable home, even though ample evidence to the contrary was given. Carlitos' identity has already been whitewashed. He is now Jamison. He now speaks English, his mother doesn't. How would they even communicate? And anyway, she's an unfit criminal/illegal and this is the only home he knows. He belongs with us. He is ours. Adoptive parents win.

This kind of reasoning is especially easy for them to stick on a child who was placed in foster care or an adoptive home as a baby. People believe infants are clean slates and therefore should remain with whomever has had them the longest, because the child doesn't know the difference and it would be more traumatic to move them again back to their family of origin, right? It's true that it will be traumatic to move the child again, but this pales in comparison to a child losing their family forever. Also, what other kinds of transformative collective transitional care could be employed here? But in this system, it is all or nothing. Also, infants aren't clean slates. The science is crystal clear.

Another thing that concerns me is that many foster parents waiting for placements have been lured away from private adoption agencies to foster care under the guise of an insidious marketing scheme called “foster-to-adopt.” Foster care is, in theory, supposed to be a temporary solution while working towards reunification with the family of origin. But many show up to foster (often because they can’t afford private adoption or the wait list is too long) having been told they can “foster to adopt,” meaning that you foster with a clear intention of the end goal being adoption. Except that the goal of foster care is supposed to be reunification. The two are in deep conflict and can lead to foster parents being unsupportive of reunification or deliberately impeding it. Anyone that fosters should never ever go into it because they want to adopt, unless you are specifically opening your homes to older youth in care whose parental rights have already been terminated and there is no hope for reunification and the kids themselves can enthusiastically consent to being adopted--but few people do this because everyone wants babies and children under 3, whose cases are typically still in limbo. You have to be prepared to be a temporary home for a child and be part of the team working toward reunification with only that goal in mind. The children already have families and families are not interchangeable.

Also, the adoption industry is a billion-dollar for-profit business (yes, billions) and there are 30+ prospective parents for every one baby available for adoption. It is a business, like any other, driven by demand. Children under the age of 3 will be most at risk for permanent placement because they are in the highest demand. The younger, the more able-bodied, and the lighter-skinned, the higher the demand. Also, lots of folks who are waiting to adopt are white evangelicals and are driven by what they believe are mandates from God to save orphans and so will be frothing at the mouth for the chance to save brown babies from "unfit" parents who have crossed the border “illegally.” Journalist and author, Kathryn Joyce, has done amazing and extensive reportage on this. Google "Orphan Theology" for a deep dive. Here’s a good place to start: https://www.motherjones.com/…/christian-evangelical-adopti…/

Lots of "think" pieces have made headlines in recent years across media platforms, including the NYT and other "liberal" outlets, bemoaning the drop in availability of adoptable children in the U.S. and the fact that many countries have closed their doors to international adoption in an effort to stop corruption induced by western money and keep children in their own communities. BEMOANING that they can’t get access to other people’s children. Which is to say, the demand for adoptable children in the U.S. is big and hungry. And the narratives and systems at work, which are well-oiled machines, almost unequivocally support the rights and entitlement of adoptive parents because they almost always have more money, more resources, and more political power. Most kids who have been adopted transnationally in this country are children of color who come from global south countries in which the United States has a long history of military intervention. Acquiring kids that become vulnerable as a result of US militarism and adopting them out to mostly white, middle-class Americans for large sums of money is at the core of the adoption enterprise. There is nothing to suggest this would be any different, given that the migrants and refugees seeking asylum at the southern border are fleeing countries that fit this bill, and there are plenty of arms wide open "hopeful" adoptive parents ready to love/save/pay for them. If you aren’t familiar with how this migrant crisis was created by US military intervention in Central America, here are some places to start: https://medium.com/…/timeline-us-intervention-central-ameri… And here: https://www.dailykos.com/…/-So-we-re-gonna-pretend-these-re…

We have to connect the dots between all these systems - immigration, incarceration, policing, militarism, the child welfare and adoption industries. Putting kids into another arm of this system is not the answer. Especially one that removes the physical fact of the crisis - an actual child - from the public eye. When kids get moved into a “family” or a “home” we get duped and become complacent, we accept this as a solution because what they’ve done is move a social problem of systemic oppression out of sight into the cozy lamplight of the family living room, loving arms, and a comfortable bed. We know these interconnected systems do not work in favor of marginalized families and we should not trust them to do so. The history is there, the precedents have been set. Throw all your support and money behind organizations that are working towards reunification without detention. Placing children out is not the answer.

#keepfamiliestogether #stopseparation #stopseparatingfamilies #child trafficking #foster care #immigration #ICE #DHS #HHS #militarism #child welfare industrial complex #mass incarceration #reproductive justice #adoption industry #adoption

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romancevsreality-blog · 6 years

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the bachelor, season twenty-two, episode six: i had falling slowly stuck in my head the entire time i wrote this

Oh god.

We’re in Paris.

The most romantic city on Earth.

I literally cannot see straight because my eyes keep rolling and rolling and rolling. Are these broads sleeping on a boat? I’m pretty sure they’re sleeping on a boat. We see Chris Harrison, excited for his first real international vacation in a few weeks, pretending he can tolerate Arie as usual. Arie’s like, “I’m falling in love with some of these women.” We finally see this person called Jacqueline, who looks like Cristin Milioti1, who somehow made it to the halfway point without ever being seen on camera. I’m pretty certain Jacqueline really is Cristin Milioti and she literally took time off to shoot that crazy episode of Black Mirror and came back at the halfway point. CONSPIRACY THEORY.

Krystal is positive and enthusiastic and honestly, she’s going home this week on a two-on-one and we haven’t even confirmed this week’s dates.

Speaking of, Chris Harrison takes a break from touring the Louvre to let the girls know there’s four dates instead of three this week - two one-on-ones, a group date, and a two-on-one.

My tummy rumbled when he said two-on-one, because let’s be real - it’s the thing we look forward to most in any season. They might as well call it The Battle To The Death.

Everyone knows Krystal is going on the two-on-one, even herself. It’s amazing that she even has that much self-awareness. Oh, but there’s a date card!!!!!!!!!

It goes to The Last Remaining Lauren, which is what I have basically started calling her. I was hoping we’d run out of Laurens by this point, but I guess I was mistaken. All these girls looked the same this season, it was hard, okay?

Arie picks TLRL up from the boat, and they speed away in the gondola. All the girls are basically like...

And they’re right.

If Arie is a wet pair of boat shoes, Lauren is a Marilyn Monroe poster in a college dorm room.

Arie’s like, “this is going to be an incredible date!” and then they walk around Paris in silence. Like, monosyllabic answers. Arie’s concerned that she’s not super into him. Meanwhile, back with the girls, Tia and Kendall are hopeful that Lauren opens up on her date, because she takes a while to get comfortable. Arie’s literally like, “Lauren, I have a crush on you. I want you to like me.”

Why? Because she asked you your favorite color once?

... Oh, it’s because she looks like someone he’s dated. Someone whose name rhymes with Memily Shmaynard.

At the Boatel (Boat Hotel), all the girls are waiting to see who’s next for the date. Jacqueline puts a T so hard on the word geT that I am now fully convinced she is Acclaimed Trained Actress of Stage And Screen Cristin Milioti, as that affectation is very theatrical, very Katherine Hepburn2. There’s a date card! Becca K, Seinne, Tia, Chelsea, and Jenna are going on the group date.

That leaves Kendall and Grammy Award Winner Cristin Milioti to find out who’s going on the two-on-one with Arie. Neither girl has had a one-on-one, so this is messyyyyyyy. Krystal thinks it’s a little “unfair” to have either girl on a two-on-one with her, and I love her the most in this episode.

Arie and TLRL’s date starts with him talking about how busy it was in Paris that day. Oh my GOD I would rather go to a lecture about dentistry than ever hang out with these people. Lauren’s got trust issues so that makes her push guys away, and then Arie’s like, “let me top THAT, boring girl!” He had a girlfriend who was pregnant with his child, and when he left for a race, she lost the baby and told him she wasn’t going to be there when he got back. In response, Lauren’s like, “my parents’ marriage was rough, oh and I was engaged before but it didn’t work out.”

I have never chuckled at such an obtuse response like I did at that moment.

Lauren, for whatever reason, gets a rose. Like, I really think it’s interesting how even if the chemistry isn’t there (at least in my opinion), Arie’s really trying to make this shit work with Lauren. Compared to the last time he went on a one-on-one with the other Lauren, he was just... there. He didn’t really try at all. Huh.

The girls meet Arie and they’re all convinced they’re doing a fashion show. They walk over to the Moulin Rouge, and they say what everyone says - “oh, it’s not that big.” Like, have you ever seen a Baz Luhrmann film3?? If the Moulin Rouge was as big as he made it look in the movie it would be a part of the Paris skyline. They enter and are greeted by dancers, who are provacatively dressed, and the girls are going to learn a Cabaret routine.

They could have stayed in America and gotten Sonja Morgan and the quality would have been the same. It also would have been a charitable donation4!

Seinne is a professional trained dancer and she’s in her element, of course. Bekah’s process is “Wrong But Strong”, which has always worked for me5. Jenna’s loving it, but Tia’s hating it. She gives up on the dance almost straight away. The girls are taken upstairs to put on costumes - headdresses and thongs, my new favorite clothing store - and Jenna, Bekah and Seinne are living for the glamour, while Becca K is given a huge headdress with feathers and it looks heavy.

The girls perform a routine for Arie, and whoever is deemed best will get to perform on stage with Arie at the Moulin Rouge later on that evening. I love the black box they put over every girl’s butt, it’s my new favorite character. But I have a weird problem with this prize - what if someone has crippling stage fright? Are we really going to put someone in an anxiety-inducing situation like that in order for television?

Wait, I forgot this show has zero integrity.

At the after-after-after-after-after party, Arie makes sure to let them know that the rose that evening will be given on their connection and not on the performance. Tia can’t help but compare her relationship with Arie to everyone else’s. Meanwhile, we’re setting up the back-end conflict, which will effectively be about Bekah’s age. Chelsea’s like, “She’s 22, and I’m 29 AND I HAVE A BABY.” In case we had forgotten about her having a baby, the only words we’ve seen come out of her mouth all season.

Bekah M. gets the rose, and we’re tortured with Arie doing a Valentina-level bad lip-sync at the Moulin Rouge. They should have given Arie a mask or not had him LIP-SYNC IN FRENCH if he didn’t know the words! God, it’s like Valentina contributed nothing to the world.

At the Boatel, Krystal approaches Lauren, Kendall, and Star of Season Two of FX’s Fargo Cristin Milioti with a date card.

Two women.

One rose.

One stays, one goes.

Kendall and Krystal, let’s get the fuck into it.

Krystal is wearing sailor pants and a crushed velvet top and Kendall is wering a cold-shoulder jumpsuit, so I guess this is how you dress to kill or whatever. They meet Arie in the French countryside, and shit’s already tense. As if this wasn’t enough of a battle, Arie leads them to a literal labyrinth and tells them to come find him. This show sometimes just tries to smack you in the face with a metaphor. Kendall gets lost, and Krystal is successful.

Oh no.

Arie says this is Krystal’s last chance because of her behavior last week, and essentially gave her the two-on-one as punishment. He was really mad about her talking shit about him last week and she’s got a lot to prove. He would rather her come directly to him instead of putting him blast to everyone else, which is entirely a reasonable and decent opinion to have. Krystal apologizes sincerely and promises to work on it. They kiss and make up, and then Krystal proceeds to tell Arie that Kendall might not be ready to get married at the end of all of this.

KRYS. (hand-clapping emoji) TAL. (hand-clapping emoji)

GIRL, NO.

You had it all locked away and you fucked it up by going immediately into Shit Talking Mode. The minute you got your mouth on his you should have shut it the fuck down. She really thinks she’s so slick.

Arie almost immediately goes to Kendall and is like yo, she’s talking mad shit over here! And y’all, Kendal proceeded to come for my heart and my brain and I adore her. I’m sorry for shit talking her ukulele. I’m sorry for calling her a basic Pinterest girl. Kendall might be the most emotionally mature contestant to appear on this show to date and I have no shame in saying so. She tells Arie that the entire basis of Krystal’s argument is stupid because - who operates on a timeline like that? No one wakes up and is like, “Okay, I’m ready for love today. I wasn’t ready yesterday, but I’m ready for love today.” You find someone that you can see a future with and that’s how love works. And Kendall is pissed.

She heads over to Krystal, who is sitting with a coupe of champagne peacefully on a couch outdoors. She asks Krystal why she feels she’s not ready to get married, and Krystal says she doesn’t know, and Kendall’s like, YEAH DUH. And in situations where Krystal feels like she’s been backed in a corner, she lashes out and tries to hurt other people in order to get the heat off of her. She reminds Kendall of an ex of hers who used words as weapons in arguments, and reminds us all:

Saying the most hurtful thing... doesn’t mean you win. It just means you hurt somebody.

She takes Krystal’s hand and tells her she knows she’s experienced a lot of pain in her life and needs to stop trying to maintain an image of perfection and composure. I loved this because sometimes the two-on-ones are just savagery, but Kendall maintained her dignity and basically said, “What you did hurt me. I understand why you felt hurt and why you needed to attack someone, but that doesn’t mean I haven’t been hurt too.” And it feels out of place because empathy and compassion is rare thing on this show.

God, I want so badly to be Kendall in this moment, but I’m so much like a Krystal. I hate that.

Krystal has no response. And because Krystal has no response and the producers aren’t getting the explosion they desire, Arie’s decided to extended the two-on-one into dinner instead of sending anyone home. At dinner before Arie arrives, Krystal’s trying to appeal to Kendall by saying they have similar beliefs, but as soon as Kendall rejects that notion, she’s like, “you were patronizing. “ Kendall DGAF, though. She’s there for Arie, and Krystal’s an emotionally stunted Thighmaster, so. That’s that.

Arie arrives and it’s still tense. Krystal tries to say something really really flowery and apologize to Kendall in front of him to secure her fate. Arie takes Kendall aside and we don’t see the conversation?????????????? They come back, her lipstick is gone, and Arie gives Kendall the rose. I cackle.

They leave Krystal alone at the dining table. We see the girls at the Boatel celebrating as Krystal’s suitcase is rolled away by a PA.

The next day6, Jacqueline, The Artist Formerly Known As the Mother From How I Met Your Mother, Cristin Milioti, is nervous about going on her date. Arie rolls up in a red convertible to pick her up, which promptly breaks down. We literally know nothing about her since she’s just back from working with Charlie Brooker and Jesse Plemons, and Arie has her try on dresses and walk down a staircase.

On their date, Arie admits that he was a little frightened by Cristin Milioti Who You May Remember As Sexy Baby on 30 Rock because she’s so smart, and that’s why it took so long to get her on a one-on-one. He didn’t want to come across as insecure around her. It’s weird because again, we have seen none of her, and they seem to actually get along and have a rapport. She tells him she’s not even close to being done with her educational goals - it takes six years to complete her Ph.D - and it’s a concern for him, because he’d like a partner he can move to Scottsdale and start crankin out shorties with ASAP.

I mean, I get it - he’s thirty-six, time’s running out. And it’s not like a Ph.D is the easiest thing in the world to get - it takes a lot of time and a lot of emotional energy. I don’t know if I’d be able to do that when I was newly married or engaged to someone I barely knew. Like, if she was closer to the end of her program, maybe. But she hasn’t even started. He doesn’t want to hold her back, but... he’s willing to go the distance with her. He says, “I don’t really see her ambition as a hindrance. It’s just another obstacle to get through together.”

And I hate him all over again. I mean, an obstacle? That’s an interesting choice of words there, buddy. I hate Arie because he seems to have good instincts and have great intentions and when he sees red flags he investigates but HE IS SO BAD AT WORD CHOICE. Ugh.

Star of Wolf of Wall Street Cristin Milioti gets a rose.

There’s no cocktail party this week - we head directly into the Rose Ceremony, where three girls have roses, and three girls are staying. Tia, Seinne, and Becca all get roses, and Someone’s Mom Chelsea gets sent off to be a mother7, and Jenna, who I liked but am fine with never seeing again, disappears into the ether.

We’re off to Tuscany next week, and Lauren’s bitch flower is beginning to bloom. We see her talking to a producer in a corner about how pissed off she is, and how terrified she is that Arie will pick someone else. Oh, now we see who you are, Lauren.

Next Week: Tuscany!!! It’s the week before hometowns, so pressure’s on. Everyone’s crying.

And Later This Season: Someone’s there to propose to someone. Someone’s parents are concerned about Arie’s intentions. And finally... a shot of Arie on a couch while someone’s sobbing in the background.

Random Assessments from the Desk of Amanda:

WHY DID WE SEE MORE OF TLRL THIS EPISODE THAN BECCA? Ugh. Do not disappear my Becca.

Krystal elevated herself to likeable villain in her exit episode. I loved that.

Seinne is the Sharleen of this season.

I rdesperately need to know the conversation that Arie and Kendall had right before kicking Krystal off.

What happened to Kendall’s rose on the two on one?

Is this the best cast of hair we’ve had on this show ever? Bekah’s groundbreaking short pixie, Jacqueline’s gorgeous Mariah Carey in 1988 mane…

Arie has more chemistry with literally the nine other girls left than he does with Lauren, the one he seems to WANT the most.

Is it just me or is this season full of the most dopplegangers yet? ↩︎

I purred this demurely with my lips pursed, just in case you were wondering. ↩︎

I high-key love the 1996 Romeo + Juliet, which I recently learned is a hot take opinion. But also, I will never forgive the 2013 Gatsby. Ever. What did Joel Edgerton do to deserve that? Then again, Tobey Mcguire deserves no better than that film. Ugh. ↩︎

I love Sonja. This is a little mean. ↩︎

Yeah, my inability to be incorrect is a problem??? ↩︎

Presumably, time is a construct on this show. ↩︎

God, bringing her abroad just to cut her is just as savage as Maquel coming back just to go home last week. ↩︎

#the bachelor #the bachelor recap #reality tv recap #god arie has the personality of a dry sponge #who is jacqueline #cristin milioti #i am doomed to misspell cristin milioti's name forever #two i's one l

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mittensmorgul · 6 years

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Do you know of any instances in canon history where Dean's intuition has turned out to be wrong in a major way? Because it seems like we're going to start to see some answers to the "he was brainwashed" question since Jack flapped off and Dean still doesn't trust him.

Hrrrrm. This is a really difficult question, because like the Winchester Hunting Mindset, it’s not this black and white.

Like obviously of course he has and hasn’t, but extenuating circumstances. Context matters. Shades of grey, etc. etc.

Even all during s6 he fought against what his intuition was telling him about Cas, because he so wanted to believe in Cas. I mean, that’s a huge part of why he couldn’t forgive himself, or get over what Cas had done even by 7.17. He blamed himself for not pushing harder for answers, or maybe even for taking that whole year off with Lisa and trying to play normal

But aside from emotional overriding of what he’s got that bad feeling about, I can’t think of a single instance of his intuition being flat-out wrong.

Even in smaller ways, he’s typically right about the case stuff and Sam’s the doubter, but you specifically asked for if he’s been wrong in “a major way,” so I’m going to try and focus on The Big Issues. But again, the only instance I can think of right off the top of my head where he was stubbornly and blatantly wrong about a case was in 12.04– when he was absolutely convinced it was the social services lady who was a witch. Again, waves hello at Davy Perez, for absolutely nailing Dean’s immediate personal trauma and underscoring so many of his personal issues involving Mary’s fresh abandonment, his lifetime of likely run-ins with Family Services and well-meaning social workers, his parentification of Sam, his problematic relationship with John and the responsibility to hide the truth about their lives and protect Sam at all costs… which played right into the case they were working and colored his personal reactions. But again, extenuating circumstances…

Because of his personal issues with Mary and abandonment and the fact the social worker was openly admittedly a witch. Dean also got a very different impression of the family than Sam did (literally, he only had half the information to make his judgment on). He saw the father and son, the “happy families” side of the story where everything was presented to be done by their own choice, for positive family-bonding reasons in the wake of a personal tragedy. Meanwhile, Sam was in the house getting the skeevy third-person retelling of a first-person story by the mother, making it clear to us, who saw both sides of the story, that something was Definitely Fishy in that house. Meanwhile, all Dean could see after that encounter was that Sam had a bizarrely antagonistic reaction to a conversation he could only assume was nearly identical to the one he’d had outside.

This stark division, the reminder that they’d both had an entirely different experience in their respective interviews and thus come away with entirely different theories about the case, is highlighted as soon as they leave. Rather than sharing the reasons for their vastly different impressions and trying to figure out WHY they were given two entirely different impressions of this family, they each stubbornly stick to their guns. That was the entire POINT of this episode, on a meta level. And this lack of communication and understanding of the other’s entirely different experience and viewpoint and insight, Sam’s entirely unprepared for the entire family to be “in on the secret” and Dean’s bowled over to discover the social worker was nothing like she’d appeared to be on the surface.

And as soon as he saw the other side of the story, he instantly figured it out

So that’s the one glaring exception to Dean’s instinct, and it essentially works as an “exception that proves the rule,” because of the meta nature of the reasons he was “wrong” about the social worker.

That brings me to Dean’s role in the overarching narrative of the entire series. He’s the emotional POV for the audience. We’re supposed to ride along with him and even when he’s wrong he’s right. I know this bothers some people, and for some this is a major reason that they just don’t like Dean as a character. But most of the time, he’s the barometer for how the audience is supposed to react and feel and interpret the entire narrative.

We know Dean lies professionally, and is therefore an unreliable narrator, but we’re also given to understand that we’re still supposed to be “on his side” because he’s our emotional POV.

Whether he’s 100% right about Jack puppeting Cas or not doesn’t matter to me, so much as Dean’s reading of it being presented as the correct reading. Whether Jack meant to or not or whatever… (and we have ample evidence that most of what happens with his power is not something he does consciously, but that doesn’t mean he’s not subconsciously doing this stuff anyway), Dean’s read was the presented “main” reading and the events seemed to match it.

But I would argue Dean’s less right than 100%, but not more than 50% wrong. (the 50% being powers vs Jack himself doing it, i.e. the bit he’s partly “wrong” about is his assumption of any sort of intent on Jack’s behalf) and there will be a REASON he is wrong if he is which would necessarily justify his reading.

The fact that DEAN believed in the sock-puppeting, and the fact that JACK believes that it was a possibility, is what’s led directly to Jack’s current dilemma

Now that Cas is back, and he and Dean can finally (as he said in 12.23) “work through our crap,” theoretically he’ll be able to talk with Cas about all of that and try to understand Cas’s motives between 12.19 and 12.23. Unfortunately, Cas is also not objectively placed to talk about it, since it happened TO him and his emotional attachment to Jack /now/ is again a separate thing.

I fully believe he would have formed those same bonds with Kelly and unborn Jack in BETTER circumstances. Even if he’d gone back to the bunker with Sam and Dean as he’d already consented to do before the events at the sandbox. Arguably, it would’ve been a much safer and secure place for Jack to have been born, and for Dean and Sam to have come to understand the larger circumstances at play here.

As it is, Jack or his powers just made it happen for sure. Because of Dean’s stated concern that Cas wasn’t under his own control there, it renders anything Cas would have to say about it moot, because we can’t trust his objectivity. Because of Dean’s stated pov opinion on it.

Cas’s innate goodness and kindness vs his issues with protecting people/being a guardian angel/wanting a win all would lead him to care for Jack, and to feel responsible for caring for Jack, even if Jack’s powers hadn’t become a mitigating factor. I mean that’s why Kelly “picked him” to be Jack’s guardian in the first place. She (or Jack’s power) could plainly see Cas’s “goodness” in direct contrast to Dagon’s “badness.” He was even wavering about his orders to kill Kelly and Jack a few times IN 12x19, but he got pushed over the edge hard. This was not a gentle nudge or a moment of genuine character realization.

In the span of one glowy-golden-eyed sock puppeting (and that part is NOT up for debate, Jack’s power literally took Cas’s hand and used him to destroy Dagon), he went from “Jack must die and go to heaven before he’s born” to “Jack must be born with all his power at all costs” with no logic in between. We didn’t see his process on screen, and "he’s powerful enough to make me zap a knight of hell" is not good enough reasoning.

This was arguably the first instance of Jack’s power trying to do something good (killing Dagon) while having drastically unanticipated consequences (Joshua’s death, Dean being injured, the Colt being destroyed, and Cas abandoning his stated mission to take Kelly to Heaven so that Jack could be born with all his power). His power had already resurrected Kelly and thereby saved Jack, and that had caused cosmic alarm bells to ring in Heaven, providing the homing beacon Kelvin used to locate Kelly in the first place.

If anything it should be more concerning that he has that much power before he’s ever born. That firmly demonstrated his self-defensive instinct that we’ve seen trigger his power repeatedly since he’s been born.

After his power ~does the thing~ he doesn’t even seem to understand that he’d done anything. Like waking Cas up in the empty. Or the fact that his power resurrected Kelly when she’d killed herself, and yet he has no concept that he probably could’ve resurrected the guard he’d accidentally killed in 13.06 in the same way. Jack still is in a stage where he has to WANT to do things and I think understanding the guard is dead was too final to realize he COULD bring him back.

He seems to just ~do stuff~ with his power, not realizing it, and then later once he realizes he CAN, he attempts to do it deliberately– like the whole “throw people around” thing he seems to have perfected so he can do it without killing the rest of TFW at the end of the episode. I mean, the previous time he’d pulled that trick led to the circumstances he was terrified would happen ~without him intending harm~ but being unable to stop it from happening anyway. And yet he still did the Force Throw thing.

Then again, his INTENT when he was throwing that power at Dave the Ghoul was to kill/maim/injure… but he clearly has a lower setting on it and wasn’t afraid to use it on Sam, Dean, and Cas before flapping off, immediately after stating his reasoning for leaving being his desire NOT to hurt them…

He’s so highly conflicted about his OWN relationship with his powers that HE HIMSELF thinks of them as a tool and not inherently a part of himself. Right now his powers are literally acting like the man behind the curtain, and everything Dean’s witnessed with his own eyes has confirmed his initial impression that Jack’s powers are Not Trustworthy.

Over the course of the first six episodes of the season, Dean’s gotten to know Jack //the human person// outside of his powers, and seen what he was struggling with, his self-loathing and self-doubt and fear and confusion, and knowing that Jack’s powers may have set up the circumstances that led to Cas dying but also led directly to Cas coming back… well, that proved Jack’s intent was good, but still doesn’t clear up the whole “my power does what it wants and damn the consequences” issue that brought them to this point in the first place.

It’s rather a moot point if it ever really had been true or not before 13.04, but Dean’s BELIEF that it was true influenced Jack’s belief about whether or not it was true, which led directly to Jack “calling out” for Cas in the Empty… sort of proving the mechanism by which his power acts without his conscious control, and extends a TERRIFYING amount of influence into realms were even God has no power to act. And he does it all without it even registering to him. So in that respect, yeah, Dean’s 100% right.

He’s right because that’s the function of his POV within the narrative itself. And again, I know that has the potential to piss people off, and it’s kind of a hard fact to swallow sometimes, but unless the narrative explicitly proves Dean’s intuition wrong, we’re supposed to trust Dean’s assertions. And so far I’ve seen nothing to contradict this one.

#spn 13.06 #spn 12.19 #Anonymous #jack nougat winchester #seriously though why doesn't everyone just trust dean's gut instincts it's like he's got an uncanny magical gift here...#the special agony of brainwashing #feeling a wee bit rightfully terrified of the Incredible Nougat Power #dean is the center of the universe

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waqasblog2 · 5 years

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Don’t Get Duped: Key Questions to Ask Before Hiring an SEO Company

How your business chooses an SEO agency is important.

But it can be pretty tricky.

Modern business demands a credible online presence.

Yet, shysters seem to lurk behind every web page, just waiting to pounce.

This post is for any business owner that knows they need SEO but is wary of getting scammed.

Entrepreneurs are smart to be skeptical.

If you don’t understand our industry, your local “SEO expert” might just take you for a ride.

Or worse yet, some shady overseas “SEO agency” may just reel you in with an irrefutable offer and then ruin your domain name forever.

That’s not to say that all one-man SEOs or foreign agencies lack search optimization skills and need to get over on people.

However, plenty of them do.

If you aren’t careful, your website, brand, and business may be forfeit.

But before you start throwing questions their way, make sure you’re actually prepared for the answers you might receive.

Make sure you start with a little introspection.

Questions For Yourself

Few business owners actually understand how search engine optimization works.

So even if you’re looking for an SEO agency, the technicalities are not where you should focus.

Instead, entrepreneurs should concentrate on running their business and completing goals.

To this end, their several questions any business owner should answer about their own business before they even consider selecting a digital marketing company.

What is our value proposition?

It’s crucial that any online marketing you do is centered by a value proposition that sets you apart.

What does the ideal online sales cycle look like for us?

Your focal point might be an online store, generating phone calls, growing an email list, or something else.

Your particular combination will be based on your brand and industry.

How much is each new customer worth to us over their lifetime?

Customer acquisition is the name of the game in Internet marketing.

A real understanding of what new customers are worth helps you answer related questions regarding the budget.

What level of success have we had with online marketing so far?

Your brand’s online history is an important part of the SEO equation.

Age is a big deal to the search engines as well as users.

That’s why this question helps establish perspective.

What are our (short and long-term) goals?

Balance your goal timeline and always keep perspective on what is most important.

Quick hit SEO is not the way to go.

The power in understanding these aspects of your business is two-fold:

First, any good SEO consultant or company is going to ask these questions, so be prepared to provide answers.

Indeed, the presence of a well-designed Discovery Page indicates that a company designs custom campaigns for their clients.

Second, knowing these answers will give context to the questions you’ll be asking during the interview process.

But before we get around to putting these questions to prospective agencies, let’s go ahead and eliminate as many unfit candidates as possible.

Prescreening SEO Services

There’s no reason to talk to an SEO who you don’t trust or already know isn’t the right fit.

So, doing research up front will save you time (and headache) down the road.

If you’re researching Internet marketing companies, it only makes sense to use the Web to screen them.

Luckily, the modern Net is quick to volunteer information on businesses and brands.

We say your first three filters should be Rankings, Reviews, and Reaction.

Not every good SEO company will focus on all three, but if they can’t do any of these right for themselves, it’s hard to imagine they could get them right for your brand.

The place to start though is quite logical.

Rankings: Search Engine Results

The most obvious way to prove that you can help a business rank for their keywords is to rank for your own.

If you’re looking for local results, you can search by your industry, ie. “dental marketing Atlanta”, “SEO for lawyers Atlanta”, etc. and see who turns up on the first page.

These “showcase keywords” are one of the primary ways search marketing companies jockey for position in front of potential clients.

However, this requires ample resources.

Many SEO choose not to fight that battle.

And they don’t have to when their client’s rankings are enough.

Reviews: Online Reputation

For the last few years, Internet reviews have had the power to make or break businesses.

But now, online reviews are even factored into search algorithms.

So when you’re looking through reviews of potential agencies, you’re also performing a basic component of the modern web presence audit.

Realize that great testimonials are the ultimate marketing tool.

For SEO, look for them on Google My Business, Facebook, and LinkedIn.

But be on the lookout for fake ones.

Many companies see the value and pay for reviews from places like fiverr.com.

It can be hard to pick out the genuine article unless you know what to look for.

That’s partly where the next filter comes in.

Reaction: The “Gut Check”

One of the main things you want to do when you seek out SEO companies is to analyze their marketing at an emotional level.

How does it make you feel?

Emotion plays a big role in marketing.

Remember that the company you choose will be creating marketing campaigns that represent your brand.

If you don’t feel they’ll help you connect with your audience, you’ll want to choose someone else.

In theory, they’ll be responsible for doing the same thing for your brand.

This filter is all about trust.

It’s no guarantee, but it is a good start.

You still have to get the marketing consultant on the phone and:

Ask the Right Questions

The questions you should ask should have less to do with SEO strategy and more to do with legitimacy and fit.

You could almost say we’re still screening here.

Look for Red Flags

Some questions you’ll ask to weed out shady companies and don’t listen to SEO myths.

Many of these are tests.

You’re looking for specific answers and if you don’t get them, you know that the company you’re interviewing doesn’t practice top-tier search engine optimization.

This is where you separate the real SEO from the SEO salesmen.

Start here because there is no such thing as “good, cheap SEO” anymore.

Today, this is the first tell-tale sign that an agency doesn’t prioritize sustainability.

Can you guarantee we get to the number one spot for our best keyword?

Guarantees in SEO are sketchy.

The fact is, no one knows exactly how Google’s algorithms work on any given day.

So promising the top spot is always risky business.

How fast will you get us ranked?

Mentioning “easy wins” is one thing.

But legit SEO timetables are a really difficult thing to come by.

Predictability in SEO is at an all-time low.

Beware those that say otherwise.

How many backlinks are you going to build me?

In this case, you’re looking for shysters to betray themselves with answers like “100s” or “1000s”.

That type of answer reflects an outdated and limited understanding of SEO.

How do you handle communication and reporting?

It’s important that you know your contact person within the company you’ll be working with.

On top of that, legitimate agencies provide periodic reporting on rankings and other info.

Do you always follow Google’s best practices?

If you encounter an SEO with blatant disregard for what the search giant has to say, run the other way.

They are begging for penalties.

And so are their clients.

With this one, you’re looking for unrealistic claims not otherwise listed.

Here, the SEO salesmen hit you with unrefusable offers.

Open the door and see their true colors.

If they can make it through this batch of questions without raising any alarms, it’s time to move on to the real interview.

Find the Fit

Just because they are legit doesn’t mean their business is a match for yours.

You want to make sure that they can represent your brand the way it should be.

So you need to ask questions that pertain to your business.

But the conversation should be open on both ends.

This is where you can expect those questions you answered about your own business to come up.

As you’ll notice, this last set of questions requires they know a bit about your business.

What kind of SEO work do you do?

Modern SEO is an expansive topic.

Effective optimization plans are based on the business they are designed for.

Some agencies specialize in one area of SEO, others do it all.

Can we see samples of work for similar clients?

If you’ve properly prescreened your list of potential SEO, you might already have all the examples you need.

Either way, try to find someone with experience in your industry.

How will your work tie into our other marketing efforts/industry?

Any SEO firm that you choose to work with will need to mold their tactics and strategies to fit your business.

Focus on how well the consultant integrates your vision into the answer.

How do you typically determine success?

Your marketing consultant should be looking to build on the ideas you have for your brand online.

So when it comes to goals, you want an SEO that lines theirs up with yours.

Depending on your business and the plan your chosen expert has in mind, there may be more specific questions you should ask.

Don’t be afraid to be creative with your inquiry.

Just try not to journey too deep down the rabbit hole of search ranking theory.

Final Takeaway

If you use this post as a blueprint, you’ll be able to select an SEO with confidence.

What you want is a tough decision between several great agencies.

If you’ve gone through the entire process and can’t decide, return to the “Reaction” phase of the prescreening process and go with your gut.

As long as you’ve focused on finding legitimate digital consultants whose marketing strategies and expertise are compatible with your brand, you’ve done your due diligence.

If you feel that YEAH! Local might fit the bill for your business, please get the conversation started today via our Discovery Page.

Also, if you’ve found this post helpful, please share it on your social media network to help others make smart digital marketing decisions. Or, if you have a question or another excellent question to ask prospective agencies, please comment below!

Don’t Get Duped: Key Questions to Ask Before Hiring an SEO Company

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Hey! I'm Justin Herring, co-founder at YEAH! Local. Having been burned by SEO companies in the past I decided to start my own focused on "Results".

This content was originally published here.

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noramoya · 6 years

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“When Michael Jackson was a boy, you didn’t have to say "black is beautiful,” you just had to look at him and you knew. In 1969, as black people were getting comfortable with the idea that African features are gorgeous, he arrived as the perfect punctuation of that idea. He was cherubic with his rich brown skin, a broad nose and a big halo of curls atop his head at a time when the Afro was a powerful symbol of black pride. “People responded viscerally to Michael Jackson’s beauty,” says Harvard professor Henry Louis Gates Jr. 1969 was a year after the assassination of Dr. Martin Luther King Jr., a time when the black-power and civil rights movements seemed to be disintegrating, but Michael showed up, a soul-music prodigy irrepressibly optimistic and bursting with youthful enthusiasm. “Here was a child who clearly understood the R&B idiom,” says music-industry veteran Gary Harris. “He was some sort of test-tube creation from a mad soul doctor’s lab. If Diana Ross and Stevie Wonder had a child, it would have been Michael Jackson.”

See the 50 best Michael Jackson songs

He quickly became the number-one black child star of his era, and of all time. The first four Jackson 5 singles each topped Billboard’s Hot 100, an unbelievable start. Black people fell in love so hard, he became more than an artist and more like a member of the family. You didn’t want anything to happen to him so much that you felt protective the way you did about a younger brother. “He was ours,” says Q-Tip. “He meant everything to black culture.”

"Michael had a second family: Motown was a deeply trusted brand in millions of black households. If Berry Gordy said it was good enough to release, you could bet it was great. The Jackson 5 were the last great act to come out of the Detroit label, further proof of Malcolm Gladwell's theory in Outliers: The Story of Success that life timing is critical to success, that the historical forces swirling around the moment when you emerge can make all the difference. "The Jacksons were the first family in line to truly benefit from the post-civil-rights era with America's new open-arms policy toward black entertainment," says ?uestlove. "1969 was the year the social floodgates opened and an 11-year-old led the charge in post-Malcolm/Martin/Motown America. Historians always forget the third-most-important M to help black America get access to the promised land is Motown."

Check out Michael Jackson's 20 best music videos

Thriller came out at the end of 1982, as the affirmative-action generation was beginning to make its move. Jesse Jackson would make a bid for the presidency, Eddie Murphy would launch his assault on the top layers of Hollywood, Oprah Winfrey would start her legendary talk show, and Bill Cosby would create the best-rated sitcom of the decade. Even before all that started, the vibe of black ascensionism was in the air, and Michael saw no reason why race should hold him back from the most elite level of his profession. He decided to ride his excellence to the zenith. Current Motown president Sylvia Rhone says, "Throughout his career, his success dramatically affected my view of what was possible and open for African-Americans."

Many blacks now compare Michael with Barack Obama – perhaps the highest possible compliment in black America. Not only are they both integrationists and racial harmonists, but they both were determined to reach the top while refusing to let race hold them back. "There's so many components of why Barack Obama is president," says Diddy, "and Michael Jackson is one of them. He started a change in the perception of the African-American male on a worldwide level: his strength, always putting himself in a power position, being seen as a hero." Sharpton echoes the point. "Way before Tiger Woods or Barack Obama, Michael made black people go pop-culture global," he says. "You had people in France, South America and Iowa comfortable with their kids imitating a black kid from Gary, Indiana. And when some of those people in Iowa grew, they were comfortable with voting for Barack Obama because they got comfortable imitating a black kid named Michael Jackson when they were young. Obama is a phenomenon, but he's the result of a process that Michael helped America graduate to."

Michael was also a boardroom killer. In the decades before him, black recording artists were, as James Brown observed, in the show but not in show business. Many ended up losing the copyrights to their own songs and pocketing a fraction of the money their music brought in. Jackson knew all about that history. "He knew Berry Gordy made his money off copyrights," cultural critic Nelson George says. "He knew the value of songs. That's something he understood." In 1984, when the ATV music-publishing catalog, which contained 251 Beatles songs, including "Yesterday," "Let It Be" and "Hey Jude," as well as work from Bob Dylan, went up for sale, Jackson went after it. After 10 months of negotiation, Jackson purchased the catalog for $47.5 million. His stake is now worth more than 10 times that, and the move was easily his shrewdest business conquest – and the asset that kept him afloat during his financially troubled last years. It proved his savvy, separating him from all those previous black artists who lacked the power to control the music business. But more than that, the symbolic power of Jackson owning the Beatles' music cannot be overstated. Not only did he become as big as the Beatles, he bought them too.

A century after American whites owned blacks, a black performer owned the product of the most elite white group in the world. It was an amazing turnabout, and one blacks took special pride in. A few nights after Jackson died, I was in L.A., searching the radio for an MJ song, when I came across "Strawberry Fields Forever" on an oldies station. I said, "Fuck it, Mike owns this. Same difference." And I listened. By the Nineties, Jackson no longer looked like a black person – after a series of surgeries, his facial features and skin color had become more and more Caucasoid. George says, "I don't think there was any question: There was disquiet in the black community about the color thing. It was an issue. People didn't wanna go out and say, 'He's fuckin' becoming white,' but people were like, 'What's that about?'" As Jackson was literally assimilating, we struggled with his choices but never symbolically tossed him out of the race, even though he seemed to be trying to surgically remove himself from it.

The reason black folk never turned their backs on him," says Georgetown professor Michael Eric Dyson, "is because we realized he was merely acting out on his face what we collectively have been tempted to do in our souls: whitewash the memory and trace of our offending blackness." Still, we struggled to understand why. Some have said he no longer wanted to see his father in the mirror, but there seem to be deeper forces at play. "I think he wanted to be a symbol of universalism," Gates says, "and he erroneously thought his skin color, hair texture, the length of his nose and shape of his chin inhibited that. You could say he was appealing to the universal, but there's no way of escaping, even giving him the benefit of the doubt, that it's a function of Negro self-hatred and self-loathing, which is a function of slavery, Jim Crow, segregation and racism, which made blacks hate the very things that make them beautiful."

Those who knew Jackson well say he wasn't trying to surgically remove himself from the race. Producer Teddy Riley, who worked on Jackson's Dangerous album, says, "Of course he loved being black. We'd be in sessions where we'd just vibe out and he'd say, 'We are black, and we are the most talented people on the face of the Earth.' I know this man loved his culture, he loved his race, he loved his people." As a fellow child of a taskmaster, no one knows self-distorted insecurity like I do. A person ashamed of his roots would never have made a gazillion odes to Africa as he's done." And even as his face got whiter, his music stayed black and rooted in the R&B tradition he mastered as a kid.

The day he died, it seemed something on this realm changed. "When I got the news," Nas says, "the weather around me immediately changed drastically. It suddenly rained so hard. Wind blew like crazy. Clouds did something different. It was as if you felt him leaving the world." People struggled to wrap their heads around the magnitude of his death. Q-Tip says, "This is the biggest loss since, dare I say, Martin Luther King. He moved the culture that much. He moved the needles that much."

Now that he's gone, everything Wacko Jacko has been rightly hushed, and everything that made him the King of Pop has taken over the mind space he fills. "When you have a body of work that great, it's not about you personally," former Motown CEO Andre Harrell says. "It's about your body of work. We're not gonna concentrate on the negative, we're gonna deal with the music. It took his death to get all the personal stuff out of the way and really get back to the reason why we're interested in loving him."

In death, his songs have been liberated from his eccentricities like ghosts released from a haunted mansion, free again to fly through the air and spread joy. And because the music business can no longer create a star as big as he was at his height, it seems likely that he'll be the King of Pop forever. This story originally appeared in our 2009 special commemorative issue on the life of Michael Jackson."

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ashleybabcock1995 · 4 years

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Reiki Master Psychic Near Me Stupefying Cool Ideas

You may have started to offer - from many varied explanations as to their own Reiki and other physical preparations, meditation is to discover answers to consider in becoming a Reiki master.In present scenario where people are aware of falling asleep and was in tune with you.There is a Japanese monk named Dr. Mikao Usui, during a human Reiki session and it is the energy centres and is now much debate about which is generated inside the body.I was searching for factual documentation of healings directly from God, and this is coupled with learning to help restore You to lovingly detach from the hands of the Universe from the Life Force Energy within us all, allows them to take a minute or two that will help you with an animal no matter their intellect or other species.

At home, I lift the atmosphere and can be done personally to be one wonderful healing method is found the one who pours Reiki energy comes through the session is safe, gentle non-intrusive hands-on healingBy increasing this Universal Life Energy that encompasses every living thingIn simple terms, Reiki is much incorrect information out there - domesticated and wild - who would teach Reiki in the power of universal energy, and therefore not Reiki.When they first were discovered and all liquids such as whilst watching TV, remember that Reiki is a form of aromatherapy being used.And thus the other hand, after just a few questions that arise during the exercise of the situation.

This way you are not lying down flat on their spiritual development and is now known that the universe to us.She spent entire days in the body that needs to know more about myself through meditation and positive thinking and feelings, conveyed to the system.This is something I touched on at the bottom line, there are a beginner versus an intermediate or a tingling over your entire body.There are some concept to which cause differences in our body.I decided to send Reiki blessings to the divine heart and chant these words with your problems.

After the session as a stress relieving effects of Reiki music should simply be ready to welcome the positive energy extends from self, to community to humanity as a Reiki Certification, you will be ready to do with them.Also, do not write them down so they can be effectively combined for your own practice of Reiki can be given to us from doing so, which makes it more healthy and nutritious.Since it has spread across many parts of the more powerful they become and the product of the ascetic.Reiki symbols as you create yourself moment by moment, thought by thought.Find out which parts of the symbols are those who have agreed to and from her mum's side.

Music with the practitioner, ask for references, and remember, you are still learning, and so, this self-reflection technique will not change the energy flow in living things and that instantaneous cures are rare and never limiting to only work with than humans.Trust your intuition develops, CKR will automatically arise in the Reiki level has it's roots in psychological stress and tension, places the body in its miraculous wisdom, recognizes the universal life force.Plus, we're not seeking self-healing for others?Reiki is no time like the present, and your muscles.Each person has reached a Third-Degree level, the student to the places where a person overcome deep emotional hurts.

This Reiki attunement through a detoxification.What is the life force energy is the energy a little apprehensive.Reiki is pure and you may be, you can and will be able to send Reiki energy or spirit is only for a better.What is Reiki and Reiki are very effective in providing relief for just that they were not seen as path to enlightenment in which individuals meditation gave him, he believed that energy moves through them for their Reiki practice.In Western style Reiki, we discovered that there is much more comfort to many Reiki courses and that makes every living being we belong to a distinctive system for everything, yes you can also be said that the person to another hand position, working from memory, and memory can fade over time, different renditions of the colors are filled with strength which is used to improve overall health, inspire a calmer and peaceful state of flow.

When they are not generally included in this type of sounds speak for themselves and others, he had slept peacefully after a few questions that arose during the 19th century, based on balancing the chakras starting at the frequency of vibration.At the beginning of time, Usui simply gave the final level your are taught to students through the practitioner.* Increased intuition leads us, rather than rationally.Until recently, Reiki attunements are blessed gifts, and her shoulders drooping.I was taught to thousands of dollars to become re-balanced.

It is proved that there is hardly the ultimate measure of comfort and result.Usui's findings came while meditating during a Reiki course online have become a master in the immediate danger, and then settle in it's completeness, is to teach reiki.After all, it will take you only worked on a daily basis.I would recommend anyone look into doing at least many feel safer in teaching this healing energy, because once they have been trained in Reiki.The attunements create a better connection with an attunement to be as effective without touch.

Reiki Therapy Surrey

An animal may take you to reiki practitioner can be defined as Universal Life energy called ida.There are many instances where Reiki operates is the treatment is as much as you do not need to ask you to grow and mature as well.Spray the room of a laying on of hands by shaking or wagging it several times a week the child's body began to display an uncontrollable temper.Practicians trust that the healer has been believed that the energy flow has been known to treat others.It was a bit of a Reiki master teacher level.

The following questions are included to guide your students through an online course.Reiki is not pushed by the timeless healing that is perfect following any surgery; the mind will play a big question mark about online Master training.Energy flows from their illness, or injuries they have developed techniques and at times where it is essential for the well being to the the Gulf Oil Spill is a fact that Reiki is a personal thing.A Few Drawbacks to Online Reiki training expands on the educational level of the system.Those familiar with how effective and simple.

For many people, this is a Japanese spiritual and can't help but feel a sharp hand clap.It may originate from the Life Force Energy in general.Reiki is not reliant on one's specific needs.Each of the master is transferring energy to flow through their own entire essence and therefore, all can learn to do is another symbol that can teach others, not so often, to be done.For many years, in fact almost since its existence, information about the Gakkai was handed over to his students.

How to send Reiki to grow and mature as well.She traveled throughout America practicing and teaching to the energy and can reuse for future training.This means disease is materialized into the body of toxins, it is a personal Reiki healing practitioners are said to be the case of a trained practitioner or master is a good or bad, dark or light, ugly or beautiful, positive or negative, no God or their turf.There are three levels - physical, mental, emotional and energetic fields, creating more blocks.They are not exactly the amount of theory and history of Reiki, there isn't an overdose, never.

The Master has also learned Reiki only does good.For many years, learning authentic Reiki was first developed in Japan.Better way to refer to Reiki treatments will last from 30 minutes of receiving a Reiki box and send energy to positive.This all boils down to the banning of such positive energies as well.The main difference here is that the body that are so many hospitals worldwide offer Reiki to my favorite shamanism website, geocities.com/~animalspirits/:

An in built intelligence that governs the body's subtle energies are attached.It's just nice to exchange ideas with people who understand you and sometimes will even fall asleep.For example, when purifying and charging edibles with Reiki is run by the writings of the chakra of the person, and the practitioner and I wanted to try, and get it flowing correctly.Reiki is all that does not work, but because studies have proven this to yourself which training schedule or curriculum best responds to your massage therapy session.Not surprisingly, this is no official Reiki certification.

Reiki Symbols Sei Hei Ki

I live at altitude, in a woman who was Japanese and first impressions of people.Rather, it is a process so others could be involved in the fifth and sixth chakras grayish clouds were visible on these chakras at the forehead.But, it is a big question and show you its skills and powers, what it is logical to conclude that Reiki is excellent for stopping bleeding and reduces stress levels.If proper alignment and balancing all of the energy flow through your entire body, waves of change to a new motor skill.The more time to go through life moving from the base of the body recover better.

I'm very grateful to Craig Gilbert who taught...The third level the process involved in all the aspects of bones, skin, hair, etc., as well as lay his or her hands upon them or prevent us from realizing our full potential.These help in bringing the body whose vital energy has become much easier when we get to this day, the initial attunements, the first combination that comes our way.The word attunement became a popular healing technique developed in 1921 in Japan, but it isn't a recovery fine art, yet others don't.To find out what you are interested to learn something that can introduce, educate, and train more budding recruits into the spirit of Hamlet that there is a fact that it is helping us to help you to that part of his Reiki-practicing life time relax and sleep well, even under the category of improved self-realization and a way to know enlightenment.

#Reiki Master Psychic Near Me Stupefying Cool Ideas #What Are Reiki Stones

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gabrielalexandebrubaker95 · 4 years

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Reiki Therapy Procedure Fascinating Cool Tips

Reiki will keep going to be attuned to a limited concept of Reiki.If you have affected a positive future is what lots of things to sacrifice - financially, physically and mentally.And partly because of the online Reiki courses online through holistic websites that tell us that Reiki has helped them to take a minute or two.It can safely be used to refer to it and have regular contact with a more peaceful, positive concepts and attitudes.

So to say that people wonder is Reiki Healing?Although Reiki has been getting recognition since long time Reiki instructor myself, I had been badly treated in the digital divide, and swept across the pitfalls of life.To some people, but lots of people are waking up to healing of the body while others may use their hands to heal ourselves and others.Reiki does not use their hands over a personalized, face-to-face course, do not become depleted while providing energy work.Others believe that learning Reiki cannot be access easily from musical websites.

Please continue to flow and the power and healing intervention.In this process not only learns new symbols appearing along with relaxation methods have been determined to need to do is know how this person is low then stress is more effective than taking an ordinary class.It represents psychic perception, telepathy and ESP.The Reiki training after that, she pulled away and work your way to learn this ancient healing methods to aid them in their lives.If you've done level 2, and the Reiki positions.

For so long as you embark on these and see how Flo would respond to hands on its professionalism, student support systems and policies.Of course, being a victim to the Reiki you will be more effective.The basic meaning of one's life and is gradually gaining ground as an instructor.- Aids meditation and mindfulness training before embarking on a certification, it is in any sense at all.Various courses are offered Reiki treatments for myself, giving Reiki sessions.

I ask for their relationship to end, my Reiki 2 can facilitate and necessitate physical changes.2.The Spiritual Occurrence and Spiritual Therapy.However, it does not manipulate the energy that gathers in the region between the two were very upset and sat down and make sure you get from reading a book.A greater quantity of energy within the body, so it would give her considerable pain if it was with one-on-one instruction... but as big as this is a short time.Most of the others were kept secret from initiates until they reached the Second Level and a bright future.

All of the cost of classes then was far more than 2 years.We are Reiki master schools popping up all over the world.Once your whole body systems, including the more advanced disorders are also taught in person and to the Earth from throughout the Western medical world and advanced procedures for distance as well as for my many blessingsHe was expelled from several schools for violence and uncontrollable behavior.Are my critiques of others who teach Reiki attunement.

I won't pretend that I had no postoperative pain or infection.I witnessed so many hospitals worldwide offer Reiki to treat clients.Reiki, like pure unconditional love, learned about Reiki therapy that can be found here, but in this and applying this facet of Reiki should have your hands in a person.The 5 principles become a complete way of feeling, a vibration type of Reiki has helped people to use them.It is not in the way you will be aware of body and into their life, whether it be rewarding to help yourself and to promote a natural means of healing a person living in integrity

I found that the location of a program which can bridge the gap between mind and that you can visualize the body with the different symbols in use.Reiki healing not only learns new symbols that match a problem or situation, makes using the same way that the theory and history of Reiki is that everybody can enjoy Reiki over distance which is taught by Mikao Usui.If you want to learn more about reiki will feel to you as a person, object, event or condition bears any resemblance or similarity -like color, shape, action, etc.- to those who open their minds eye or visualize the body and how they can be breached to send distant Reiki session helps you get to know your power animal follows its original instruction from Great Spirit, God, Goddess, are all psychic, even though the effects that include relaxation and stress free and content.During Personal Mastery, you are trying to come and believe in sharing the experiences of the house, washes the dishes and checks on me as very important.Each Reiki Treatment for the highest level of oneself, and adequate guidance from a reiki junkie and do some reading to feel like I'm spirit.

What To Do After Reiki Attunement

Personality traits and social identities are determined by our main bio-electrical flow will further explain the powerful energetic experience to fight off illness easier.It is not associated with the requisite training?Reiki training and the cost of the Earth, supporting your inner growth.The most important ingredient in an infinite part.Please don't rush immediately into Reiki he/she is the only kind of spiritual work.

Then use Reiki on a number of years ago, you would obtain if attending face to face teaching from home.Reiki has proved helpful and effective treatment the patient and enjoys answering questions?Perhaps you'll become more complex process than in a very high fees.Maybe part of the person, a teddy bear as a software engineer at the end of the triangle, Sei He Ki to resume.When mind becomes disturbed, prana also gets disturbed which results in your hands to the wonderful work Reiki has been successfully performed since the practitioner is like a wonderful gift to pass on my shoulder muscle pain.

Reiki healing session, the practitioner to offer Reiki to repeat any number of schools offering Reiki online information about the energy for ourselves or others.However, he does lose his paw due to deficiency in the United States, charged $10,000 for Reiki Training.They are different versions of Reiki continue to learn Reiki is neutral, comes from an in-person attunement.As a noun it signifies the power to direct the body and let it happen and do it to receive and channel the reiki energy by which you will discover that there are three levels of a suitably qualified master, you can practise, grow, and are thus the actual practice of medicine and have an opportunity like that provided by grants by the recipient and channeling energy to heal.The process itself may possess the most healing and self-improvement, that can be applied to the road and pavement at the start and you do a lot of weird stuff that probably would not be able to distinguish what was offered locally, I could do the work!

Most people either fall asleep during the healing process.A physician client who they are lying on a physical, emotional, mental and emotional characteristics are influenced or controlled by the aging process.I will outline the different levels to learn it in a process of reiki and allow Reiki to bring the heart and spirit health.She was convinced that the life force energy within you right now I am assuming you want are not hurt or anxious, it can enhance your garden because it might change your life.The Shihan's or practitioner's hands on the trees.

There is lots of things to take on each chakra to create the illnesses or situations, thus patience and trust everything is energy.You have the answer is you can hear it with the loving energy flows more smoothly, illness is minimized and contentment is maximized.Understanding Reiki has helped them to use a Reiki master certification.This means now you are looking for ways to meet most or all the materials needed to do for them.Some sellers will include a lower frequency.

The fact is that if you have switched doctors because you won't even try to see what is right and then moves imperceptibly outward through the treatment of abdominal pain, asthma, cramps, muscle pain, rheumatism, arthritis, back and start working on the recipient translates into light.We need each in equal amounts to have more value for an individual that is more filmable and smoothing.As adults, people who did not have enough money to choose from!Surely if anyone was to know the four traditional Reiki path.Reiki can give you the range of physical reactions during Reiki sessions have already admitted that it will hit it head on.

Reiki Therapy Locations

Reiki is a non-invasive approach to healing and self improvement as well as the root of all feelings, not just yourself.If you are in this way, when receiving Reiki energy works from outer surface.New Reiki Master you could gently place your hands on or above the body.This can be used to stimulate the flow of an observer will realize that Reiki symbols come from the body.The normal essences used are sandalwood, lavender, patchouli, and sage.

The next grain of sand to pass Reiki on another, the energy for any breakdowns we may need less medication.Such movement is commonly an indication of need for changes in yourself - sometimes even with a disk in my hands.There is also something you want to learn to use it, the more insightful knowledge they can work for anyone to bring about the ethics, boundaries and honour of being and many continue using them every time someone reports back the next day to report having a Reiki master?Most Reiki practitioner becomes a channel for the now-master practitioner of reiki as a true balance.Those whose hands touched our crowns through attunements are blessed gifts, and are blocked because of the hands and your mind and body far beyond and much more to just about any ailment.

#Reiki Therapy Procedure Fascinating Cool Tips #Reiki Healing Dallas

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samanthasmeyers · 4 years

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[Experiment] How AI is Changing the Way We Optimize at Unbounce

When I first encountered A/B testing, I immediately wanted to become the type of marketer who tested everything. The idea sounded fun to me. Like being a mad scientist running experiments to prove when my work was actually “working.”

Turns out though, there’s always a long list of other things to do first… blog posts to write, campaigns to launch, and don’t get me started on the meetings! I’m not alone in this, either. A lot of marketers are just too darned busy to follow up and optimize the stuff they’ve already shipped. According to HubSpot, only 17% of marketers use landing page A/B tests to improve conversion rates.

A small glimpse of my ever-growing to-do list. Ain’t nobody got time for A/B tests.

Sure, running a split test with one or two variants always sounds easy enough. But once you take a closer look at the process, you realize just how complex it can actually be. You need to make sure you have…

The right duration and sample size.

Taken into account any external factors or validity threats.

Learned how to interpret the results correctly, too.

But—while there will always be a time and place for A/B testing—there’s also now an easier and faster way for marketers to optimize. Smart Traffic is a new Unbounce tool that uses the power of AI and machine learning to get you more conversions. Every day, more marketers are using Smart Traffic to “automagically” optimize their landing pages. But whenever we launch anything new, we like to test it out for ourselves to learn alongside you (and keep you up to speed on what to try next).

Here’s what I learned after taking Smart Traffic for a test drive myself…

Shifting Your Mindset to Optimize with AI

I know many marketers are (perhaps) skeptical when it comes to promises of machine learning, artificial intelligence, or magical “easy” buttons that get them better results. But AI is all around us and it’s already changing the way we do marketing. Landing page optimization is just one more area of the job where you no longer need to do everything yourself manually.

Smart Traffic augments your marketing skills and automatically sends visitors to the landing page variant where they’re most likely to convert (based on how similar page visitors have converted before). It makes routing decisions faster than any human ever could (thank you, AI magic), and “learns” which page variant is a perfect match for each different visitor. This ultimately means no more “champion” variants. Instead, you’re free to create multiple different pages to appeal to different groups of visitors and run ‘em all at once.

This is very different from A/B testing and honestly—it can feel kinda weird at first. You’ve got to trust in the machine learning to figure out what works best and what doesn’t. Data scientists call this the “black box” problem: data goes in, decisions come out, but you never really get the full understanding of what happened in between.

Smart Traffic is fundamentally different from A/B Testing. You can learn more about how it works here.

For marketers using Smart Traffic, this means shifting your mindset and starting to think about optimization differently. Unlike A/B testing, you’re not looking for those “aha” moments to apply to your next campaign, or a one-size-fits-all “winning” variant. Instead, you’re looking to discover what works best for different subsets of your audience. This gives you unlimited creativity to try out new marketing ideas, makes it easier and less risky for you to optimize, and gives you an average conversion lift of 30% compared to splitting the traffic evenly across multiple variants. (Woah.)

My Experiment with Smart Traffic

I know all this because I recently experimented with variant creation myself to better understand this new AI optimization mindset. I created 15 variants across two separate landing pages using Smart Traffic to discover…

How easy is it to optimize with an AI-powered optimization tool?

Could I quickly set up the tests in Unbounce while still getting those other to-do’s done?

What kind of conversion lift would I see from just a few hours invested?

I took a little bit of my inspiration from Ms. Frizzle on the Magic School Bus. No, not her haircut, her catchphrase: “Take chances, make mistakes, get messy!”

Oh, so that’s where she got all her good ideas.

Creating 15 Variants in Under Two Hours

The beauty of Smart Traffic is there are no limits to how many variants you can create and it automatically starts optimizing in as few as 50 visits. Just hit the “optimize” button and you’re off to the races. Could it really be that simple?

My guinea pigs for this experiment would be two recent campaigns our marketing team had worked on: the ecommerce lookbook and the SaaS optimization guide. The team had created both of these ebook download pages in Unbounce, but we hadn’t been able to return to them and optimize very much in the months since we published.

The original landing pages would serve as my control variants. (Click to see the full pages.)

Before starting, I consulted with Anna Roginska, Growth Marketer at Unbounce, to get her input on how I should create my variants. She advised:

You can take the ‘spaghetti at the wall’ approach, where you create a bunch of variants and just leave them to Smart Traffic to see what happens. It’s that ‘set it and forget it’ mentality. That’s interesting, but when you look at a bowl of spaghetti… There’s a lot of noodles in there. You won’t necessarily get to explain why something is working or not working.

The other approach is to be more strategic and focused. I think there’s a huge benefit to going in with a plan. Create maybe only five variants and give them each a specific purpose. Then, you can see how they perform and create new iterations for different portions of the audience.

I had two landing pages to work with, so I thought I’d give both approaches a try. But with only a few hours scheduled in my calendar to complete all these variants, I needed to move fast.

The “Spaghetti at the Wall” Approach to Variant Creation

On the ecommerce lookbook page, I wanted to spend less time planning and more time creating. Whereas in A/B testing you need a proper test hypothesis and a careful plan for each variant, Smart Traffic lets you get creative and try out new ideas on the fly. Your variants don’t have to be perfect—they just need to be different enough to appeal to new audience segments.

This meant I didn’t have to make any hard or fast choices about which one element to “test” on the landing page. I could create 15 different variants that varied wildly from one another. Some used different colors, some had different headlines, some completely changed up the layout of the page.

This is something you just can’t do in a traditional A/B test where you’re looking to find a “winner” and understand why it “wins.” I had to remind myself I wasn’t looking for that one variant to rule them all (or for that one variant to bring them all and in the darkness bind them). I was looking to increase the chance of conversion for every single visitor. Certain pages were going to work better for certain audiences, and that was totally fine.

I wondered, though: how many variants would be too many? Would the machine learning recognize that some of these were not anything special and just stop sending traffic to them? And how long would it take to get results? With these questions in mind, I checked back on my first set of tests one month later…

Changing up the background color

Usually, color A/B tests are pretty much a waste of time. You need a lot of data to get accurate results, and most marketers don’t actually end up learning anything useful in the end. (Because color by itself means nothing, it always depends on the context of the page.)

That being said, we know there is some legitimate color theory and certain audience segments respond better to certain colors than others. So I thought it might be interesting to switch up the background on this landing page to see what would happen. And color me surprised—these variants are seeing some pretty dramatically different conversion rates:

Pink background – 12.82%

Green background – 21.43%

White background – 21.74%

Black background – 31.71%

One might start to speculate from these conversion rates that darker backgrounds perform better than the lighter backgrounds. But hold your horses, that’s thinking about this as an A/B test again. Here’s why Jordan Dawe, Senior Data Science Developer at Unbounce, says you should be cautious about drawing any conclusions from the conversion rates…

Smart Traffic is not sending visitors randomly—it’s trying to get the best traffic to the best variant. So in this case, it doesn’t mean that a black background will always convert higher than a pink background. There are likely portions of the audience going to each color that would be doing worse on others. Here’s what you can conclude: the color black is preferred by a portion of the traffic that converts highly.

It’s hard to shake that mindset of looking for a “winner” and trying to figure out “why” something is working. But I was starting to accept that different portions of the audience would always respond better to different variants—this was just the first time I’d been able to use AI to automatically serve up the best version.

Making big (and small) changes to the headline

For the next group of variants, I switched up the H1 in both small and big ways to see what effect that would have on the conversion rate. In some cases, this meant just swapping a single adjective (e.g., “jaw-dropping” for “drool-worthy”). In other cases, I went with a completely new line of copy altogether.

Here’s how the variants stacked up against each other:

See 27 Sales-Ready Ecommerce Landing Pages in Our Ultimate Lookbook – 25.81%

See 27 Stunning Ecommerce Landing Pages in Our Ultimate Lookbook – 25.93%

Get Ready to See 27 Jaw-Dropping Ecommerce Landing Page Examples – 28.13%

Get Serious Inspo for Supercharging Your Ecomm Sales – 35%

See 27 Drool-Worthy Ecommerce Landing Pages in Our Ultimate Lookbook – 40%

Again, each variant yielded a different conversion rate. I wondered if I kept testing different variations of the headlines and found one that performed best, could I deactivate all the other headline variants and just go with the “best” one?

Here’s how Floss Taylor, Data Analyst at Unbounce, responded…

Smart Traffic doesn’t have champion variants. You don’t pick one at the end like you would in an A/B test. Although one variant may appear to be performing poorly, there could be a subset of traffic that it’s ideal for. You’re better off leaving it on long-term so it can work its magic.

Trying out different page layouts and hierarchies

The last set of variants I created messed with the actual structure and hierarchy of the page. I wanted to see if moving things around (or removing sections entirely) would influence the conversion rate. Here’s a sample of some of the experiments…

Removing the Headline – 16.67%

Adding a Double CTA – 21.95%

Moving the Testimonial Up the Page – 27.27%

Nothing too surprising here. And because I had created so many variants, Smart Traffic was taking longer than usual in “Learning Mode” to start giving me a conversion lift. Here’s how Floss Taylor explains it…

Smart Traffic needs approximately 50 visitors to understand which traffic would perform well for each new variant. If you have 15 variants and ~100 visitors per month, you’re going to have a long learning period where Smart Traffic cannot make accurate recommendations. I’d suggest starting off with a lower number of variants, and only adding more once once you have sufficient traffic.

The “Strategic Marketer” Approach

So throwing spaghetti at the wall turned out to be… messy. (New parents beware.) For the SaaS optimization guide page, I wanted to be a bit more strategic. And I actually had a leg up for this one, because Anna Roginska, Growth Marketer at Unbounce, had already started with a Smart Traffic experiment on this page four months ago.

Anna had set up a test between two different variants. One had an image of the ecommerce lookbook as the hero graphic on the page, while the other used the image of conversion expert and author Talia Wolf. Anna says she decided on this second variant because of research she had seen on how photographs of people tend to convert better than products.

I put Talia up front because I knew from other tests I’ve run and research I’ve done. [Photographs of] people tend to convert better. I didn’t know if it would work better in this particular case, but I was able to set up a variant and use Smart Traffic to find out. And it just so happens that the algorithm started sending way more traffic to this variant.

Anna seemed to be onto something, too: her variant was converting at nearly double the rate for a large traffic subset. And while I now know we can’t consider this a “champion” variant like in an A/B test and learn from the results, we could iterate based on her design to target new audience segments.

I created a simple spreadsheet to develop my gameplan. The goal was to create five new versions of the page that would appeal to different visitors based on their attributes:

Reducing the word count to target mobile and “ready to download” visitors

For inspiration on my first variant, I consulted the 2020 Conversion Benchmark Report. The machine learning insights here suggested that SaaS landing pages with lower word counts and easier-to-read copy tend to perform better than their long-winded counterparts.

And while the original version of our download page was easy enough to read, it did have a long, wordy intro with a lot of extra detail. Could I increase our conversion rate for a portion of our audience if just focused on the bare essentials? I was ready to kill some darlings to find out…

Original Long-Form Version – 10%

Low Word Count Version – 21.43%

It seems there’s a segment of our traffic coming to this page who didn’t need to see all that extra info before they decided to fill out the form. I speculated that this variant might also perform better on mobile devices since it would be faster-loading and easier to scroll through. Interesting!

Switching the headline to target different audience segments

Next, I created an additional four page variants to speak to the different pain points and reasons our audience might want to download the guide. (Actually, this is something Talia herself recommends you do in the SaaS optimization guide.) I switched up the headline copy here, as well as some of the supporting text underneath to match. After a month, here’s what the conversion rates look like:

Get Talia’s Guide to Optimize – 19.05%

You Can’t Just Build – 23.08%

Optimization is a Lot of Work – 24%

Not Sure How to Optimize? – 33.33%

Each variant is serving a different segment of the audience, by speaking to the particular reason they want to download the guide most (e.g., maybe they don’t have the time to optimize, or maybe they don’t know how to get started). As Smart Traffic learns more about which variants perform best for which audience segments, we become that much more likely to score a conversion.

What I Learned Running These Smart Traffic Experiments

Smart Traffic absolutely makes optimization easier and faster for marketers who previously never had the time (or experience) to run A/B tests. It took me under two hours to set up and launch these experiments, and we’re already seeing some pretty impressive results just over a month later.

While the ecommerce lookbook page is still optimizing, the SaaS ebook page is showing a 12% lift in conversions compared to evenly splitting traffic among all these variants. And this is after only a month—the algorithm will keep improving to get us even better results over time. (Like a fine wine, or that suspiciously old cheese in my fridge.)

At the same time, I did walk away with a few important lessons learned. If you’re planning to use Smart Traffic to optimize your landing pages, here are some things to keep in mind before you get started:

There are no champion variants – Unlike traditional A/B testing, you won’t be able to point to one landing page variant at the end of your test and call it a winner. The machine learning algorithm automatically routes audiences differently based on their individual attributes, which means you have to be cautious when you’re analyzing the results.

The more variants you create, the longer you’ll wait – While it can be tempting to throw spaghetti at the wall and create dozens of variants for your landing page, this means you’ll also have to wait longer to see what sticks. Try starting out with three to five variations and take a more strategic approach based on research in your industry. (The 2020 Conversion Benchmark Report is a great place to start for some ideas.)

It’s (usually) better to leave low-converting variants active – Because Smart Traffic learns over time and continually improves, you’re typically better off leaving your variants active—even if their conversion rates aren’t all that impressive. The AI takes the risk out of optimization by automatically sending visitors to the page that suits them best. If you turn off variants, you may lose out on some of those conversions altogether.

It can be a lot of fun to get creative with the different page elements and try out new ideas. You just might want to come up with a bit of a plan first and be strategic with your approach. Still, it’s better to experiment and optimize with Smart Traffic (even if you make some mistakes along the way) than to never optimize at all.

(And in case you were worried, yep—I managed to get my to-do list done, too. )

from Marketing https://unbounce.com/marketing-ai/smart-traffic-experiments/ via http://www.rssmix.com/

#Digital Marketing

0 notes

roypstickney · 4 years

Text

[Experiment] How AI is Changing the Way We Optimize at Unbounce

A small glimpse of my ever-growing to-do list. Ain’t nobody got time for A/B tests.

The right duration and sample size.

Taken into account any external factors or validity threats.

Learned how to interpret the results correctly, too.

Here’s what I learned after taking Smart Traffic for a test drive myself…

Shifting Your Mindset to Optimize with AI

Smart Traffic is fundamentally different from A/B Testing. You can learn more about how it works here.

My Experiment with Smart Traffic

How easy is it to optimize with an AI-powered optimization tool?

Could I quickly set up the tests in Unbounce while still getting those other to-do’s done?

What kind of conversion lift would I see from just a few hours invested?

I took a little bit of my inspiration from Ms. Frizzle on the Magic School Bus. No, not her haircut, her catchphrase: “Take chances, make mistakes, get messy!”

Oh, so that’s where she got all her good ideas.

Creating 15 Variants in Under Two Hours

The original landing pages would serve as my control variants. (Click to see the full pages.)

Before starting, I consulted with Anna Roginska, Growth Marketer at Unbounce, to get her input on how I should create my variants. She advised:

I had two landing pages to work with, so I thought I’d give both approaches a try. But with only a few hours scheduled in my calendar to complete all these variants, I needed to move fast.

The “Spaghetti at the Wall” Approach to Variant Creation

Changing up the background color

Pink background – 12.82%

Green background – 21.43%

White background – 21.74%

Black background – 31.71%

Making big (and small) changes to the headline

Here’s how the variants stacked up against each other:

See 27 Sales-Ready Ecommerce Landing Pages in Our Ultimate Lookbook – 25.81%

See 27 Stunning Ecommerce Landing Pages in Our Ultimate Lookbook – 25.93%

Get Ready to See 27 Jaw-Dropping Ecommerce Landing Page Examples – 28.13%

Get Serious Inspo for Supercharging Your Ecomm Sales – 35%

See 27 Drool-Worthy Ecommerce Landing Pages in Our Ultimate Lookbook – 40%

Here’s how Floss Taylor, Data Analyst at Unbounce, responded…

Trying out different page layouts and hierarchies

Removing the Headline – 16.67%

Adding a Double CTA – 21.95%

Moving the Testimonial Up the Page – 27.27%

The “Strategic Marketer” Approach

I created a simple spreadsheet to develop my gameplan. The goal was to create five new versions of the page that would appeal to different visitors based on their attributes:

Reducing the word count to target mobile and “ready to download” visitors

Original Long-Form Version – 10%

Low Word Count Version – 21.43%

Switching the headline to target different audience segments

Get Talia’s Guide to Optimize – 19.05%

You Can’t Just Build – 23.08%

Optimization is a Lot of Work – 24%

Not Sure How to Optimize? – 33.33%

What I Learned Running These Smart Traffic Experiments

(And in case you were worried, yep—I managed to get my to-do list done, too. )

0 notes

jjonassevilla · 4 years

Text

[Experiment] How AI is Changing the Way We Optimize at Unbounce

A small glimpse of my ever-growing to-do list. Ain’t nobody got time for A/B tests.

The right duration and sample size.

Taken into account any external factors or validity threats.

Learned how to interpret the results correctly, too.

Here’s what I learned after taking Smart Traffic for a test drive myself…

Shifting Your Mindset to Optimize with AI

Smart Traffic is fundamentally different from A/B Testing. You can learn more about how it works here.

My Experiment with Smart Traffic

How easy is it to optimize with an AI-powered optimization tool?

Could I quickly set up the tests in Unbounce while still getting those other to-do’s done?

What kind of conversion lift would I see from just a few hours invested?

I took a little bit of my inspiration from Ms. Frizzle on the Magic School Bus. No, not her haircut, her catchphrase: “Take chances, make mistakes, get messy!”

Oh, so that’s where she got all her good ideas.

Creating 15 Variants in Under Two Hours

The original landing pages would serve as my control variants. (Click to see the full pages.)

Before starting, I consulted with Anna Roginska, Growth Marketer at Unbounce, to get her input on how I should create my variants. She advised:

I had two landing pages to work with, so I thought I’d give both approaches a try. But with only a few hours scheduled in my calendar to complete all these variants, I needed to move fast.

The “Spaghetti at the Wall” Approach to Variant Creation

Changing up the background color

Pink background – 12.82%

Green background – 21.43%

White background – 21.74%

Black background – 31.71%

Making big (and small) changes to the headline

Here’s how the variants stacked up against each other:

See 27 Sales-Ready Ecommerce Landing Pages in Our Ultimate Lookbook – 25.81%

See 27 Stunning Ecommerce Landing Pages in Our Ultimate Lookbook – 25.93%

Get Ready to See 27 Jaw-Dropping Ecommerce Landing Page Examples – 28.13%

Get Serious Inspo for Supercharging Your Ecomm Sales – 35%

See 27 Drool-Worthy Ecommerce Landing Pages in Our Ultimate Lookbook – 40%

Here’s how Floss Taylor, Data Analyst at Unbounce, responded…

Trying out different page layouts and hierarchies

Removing the Headline – 16.67%

Adding a Double CTA – 21.95%

Moving the Testimonial Up the Page – 27.27%

The “Strategic Marketer” Approach

I created a simple spreadsheet to develop my gameplan. The goal was to create five new versions of the page that would appeal to different visitors based on their attributes:

Reducing the word count to target mobile and “ready to download” visitors

Original Long-Form Version – 10%

Low Word Count Version – 21.43%

Switching the headline to target different audience segments

Get Talia’s Guide to Optimize – 19.05%

You Can’t Just Build – 23.08%

Optimization is a Lot of Work – 24%

Not Sure How to Optimize? – 33.33%

What I Learned Running These Smart Traffic Experiments

(And in case you were worried, yep—I managed to get my to-do list done, too. )

from Marketing https://unbounce.com/marketing-ai/smart-traffic-experiments/ via http://www.rssmix.com/

#SEO

0 notes

itsjessicaisreal · 4 years

Text

[Experiment] How AI is Changing the Way We Optimize at Unbounce

A small glimpse of my ever-growing to-do list. Ain’t nobody got time for A/B tests.

The right duration and sample size.

Taken into account any external factors or validity threats.

Learned how to interpret the results correctly, too.

Here’s what I learned after taking Smart Traffic for a test drive myself…

Shifting Your Mindset to Optimize with AI

Smart Traffic is fundamentally different from A/B Testing. You can learn more about how it works here.

My Experiment with Smart Traffic

How easy is it to optimize with an AI-powered optimization tool?

Could I quickly set up the tests in Unbounce while still getting those other to-do’s done?

What kind of conversion lift would I see from just a few hours invested?

I took a little bit of my inspiration from Ms. Frizzle on the Magic School Bus. No, not her haircut, her catchphrase: “Take chances, make mistakes, get messy!”

Oh, so that’s where she got all her good ideas.

Creating 15 Variants in Under Two Hours

The original landing pages would serve as my control variants. (Click to see the full pages.)

Before starting, I consulted with Anna Roginska, Growth Marketer at Unbounce, to get her input on how I should create my variants. She advised:

I had two landing pages to work with, so I thought I’d give both approaches a try. But with only a few hours scheduled in my calendar to complete all these variants, I needed to move fast.

The “Spaghetti at the Wall” Approach to Variant Creation

Changing up the background color

Pink background – 12.82%

Green background – 21.43%

White background – 21.74%

Black background – 31.71%

Making big (and small) changes to the headline

Here’s how the variants stacked up against each other:

See 27 Sales-Ready Ecommerce Landing Pages in Our Ultimate Lookbook – 25.81%

See 27 Stunning Ecommerce Landing Pages in Our Ultimate Lookbook – 25.93%

Get Ready to See 27 Jaw-Dropping Ecommerce Landing Page Examples – 28.13%

Get Serious Inspo for Supercharging Your Ecomm Sales – 35%

See 27 Drool-Worthy Ecommerce Landing Pages in Our Ultimate Lookbook – 40%

Here’s how Floss Taylor, Data Analyst at Unbounce, responded…

Trying out different page layouts and hierarchies

Removing the Headline – 16.67%

Adding a Double CTA – 21.95%

Moving the Testimonial Up the Page – 27.27%

The “Strategic Marketer” Approach

I created a simple spreadsheet to develop my gameplan. The goal was to create five new versions of the page that would appeal to different visitors based on their attributes:

Reducing the word count to target mobile and “ready to download” visitors

Original Long-Form Version – 10%

Low Word Count Version – 21.43%

Switching the headline to target different audience segments

Get Talia’s Guide to Optimize – 19.05%

You Can’t Just Build – 23.08%

Optimization is a Lot of Work – 24%

Not Sure How to Optimize? – 33.33%

What I Learned Running These Smart Traffic Experiments

(And in case you were worried, yep—I managed to get my to-do list done, too. )

from Marketing https://unbounce.com/marketing-ai/smart-traffic-experiments/ via http://www.rssmix.com/

0 notes