Please my dear bless us with some 2p Canada body headcanons
2p! Canada Body Headcannons
Matt, much like Allen, isn't very concerned about his body
He takes good care of himself, even if he looks rough on the outside
It's more of an internal care - like eating healthy and working out
"Body is a temple" ideology, without the whole "temple" part
He's pale, but not for lack of trying
He's always outside, but he often wears long sleeves or works in the shade
When he is in the sun long enough, he'll tan just a bit
then burn
quickly
The summer is the worst for him, because it's either get burned or suffer through a heat stroke
Moving on though, Matt is a bear of a man
no pun intended
He's 6'0", heavy set, with a good balance of fat and muscle
(IK an older post says he's 5'11" i wanted to change that)
He's not body-builder ripped, but he's not overweight either
He's got strong bones, and is crazy strong
like superhero strong
okay maybe not superhero strong but you get my point
In his woodworking hobby he's often carrying around heavy equipment and slabs of wood, so muscles are sure to follow
But at the same time, much like a bear, Matt likes to relax and indulge in food, so he's got some insulation too
He's got dirty blond hair that falls just above his shoulders
It's naturally soft, but at points show signs of breakage due to his habit of holding it back.
Usually a short ponytail, but recently he has unironically been sporting a man bun
If he's really feeling bored, he'll cut it, but that's not very common
He knows for some reason people like to play with it, so that's one of the few reasons he keeps it at the length it is
but enough about his hair
lets talk about his body
hair
he's got a lot
the jokes about this man being a bear aren't really jokes
because he's blond they aren't as notable, but they are 100% there
They are most obvious on his arms
If he is self conscious about anything, it's hair on his back
he finds it such a weird thing that human bodies do
and if it get's too long he's got to shave it
He's got no tattoos, but plenty of scars
mostly mundane things, like injuries from woodworking, or tripping
he does have on on his upper thigh he loves to joke about though
a wild night with Allen lead to the two getting blackout drunk, so neither actually know how it happened
but they come up with a different story every time it comes up
Luciano has not yet figured this out
His hands are calloused from his hobby
He takes pride in this though, saying their are proof of a life well lived
Though he wears it like a badge of honor, it makes using phones a bit hard
I don't think he's ever used his fingerprint to unlock his phone
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2P Hetalia as The Eric Andre Show Quotes
2P Romano- “Bitches be shopping”
2P France- “Are you combing my hair for lice?”
2P Prussia- “I wanna get taxidermied”
2P China-“You gotta eat the whole lettuce”
2P America: “Freedom ain’t not free!”
2P England- “If you see a knife go away from it”
2P Germany- “My seat feels like, uh, like it’s alive or something”
2P Spain- “What do you think the Holy Ghost looks like? Is it like a zombie or something?”
2P Italy- “You into guns?”
2P Japan- “Do I regulate? Always”
2P Russia- “Alright, it’s time to play These Are People!”
2P Austria- “Hey have you ever heard a guitar before? They’re like whoa-woo-wee-wo-wee”
2P Canada- “The microphone is dripping”
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