#ada 🍋
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Okay but to start-
Yeonjun'd just shamelessly send you photos of himself, his dick, videos of him jerking off, voice recordings of him just saying the dirtiest little things to you, telling you how he can't wait to get back home, how he wishes the hand he's using to get himself off was your tight little cunt.
And he'd ask for photos in return, asking you to put on the little lace pantie set he got you for your birthday, asking for a photo of your fingers snug between the panties and your pretty little pussy, asking for a video of you touching yourself, wanting nothing more to hear your addictive moans.
And he'll jerk off to it too, going so far as to send you a video of him jerking off to your video playing on the computer.
Oh, and he'd be dirty about it too, showing you how the members are just on the other side of the room, how if Beomgyu rolled over and opened his eyes he'd see your video playing on the screen.
The one thing he wouldn't do would be FaceTiming you, oh no, because he can't have his little baby seeing him jerk off live, now can he?
But he'll have you waiting for him as soon as he gets home, even if the members are in the dorm, and you best believe that your clothes will be off in record time, Yeonjun bending you over the mattress, cheek against the pillows at the head of the bed, and would teasingly prod your entrance with his tip, smirking at how you beg and teasing you, telling you how happy he is to finally be able to fuck his little slut again, how badly he needed you on tour, and why don't you just come along next time? That way he can fuck you every night.
He'll just pummel you into the mattress, the sound of your cries filling the room, and his lips will be all over your neck, your back, teeth nipping the skin of your shoulder (and I'm back at it with the shoulder biting agenda ✋), and when you cum he'll make fun of you, saying you're so needy, such a horny girl, cumming so quickly for him.
He'll go at it for a while too, successfully making you an overstimulated mess of whimpers, making you cum at LEAST thrice, if not more, probably breeding you too ✋
HERE YOU GO HAHA JUST WROTE THIS IN FIVE MINUTES-
you put your whole adaussy into this holy shit
fucjkshghs yeonjun is such a tease!! >< supplying your whole spank bank with all the photos and videos he's sending and you're definitely supplying his. ooh can you imagine him filming you guys fucking once he gets back and him saving the video so he can remind himself of what he gets to come home to 😳😳
#ooghhhh these are making me so 😵💫#how did i just glaze over the 'possibly breeding you' part i am now ded#ada 🍋#yeonjun hard thoughts#kitty face 🐱❤️🔥
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BUT ANYWAYS GUESS WHO TALKED TO HER CRUSH AND ENDED UP TOUCHING HIS HAND A BUNCH-
WOAAH GOOD FOR YOU 👀👀👀
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ADA Dazai x Reader
💌Obligatory sex pollen fic I guess??💌
Summary: Certain abilities Dazai can dispel outright without touching the user. This has always confused the brunette greatly where the technical line was drawn. During Q's apocalypse, he couldn't bring individuals back to their senses but with Shiwabusa's fog he could prevent Chuuya’s ability from manifesting. Apparently this “Sex pollen” ability was more like the former example. Which left Dazai the only one conscious of their actions as everyone fucked like rabbits.
Notes: Based on a dream I had a few nights ago. At least what I can remember of it. It's got some plot holes & semi ooc but it was hilarious, I had to share it with the class.
Contains: sex pollen, dubcon, pregnancy, mpreg, pregnant Fyodor, Fyodor being painfully religious, 🍋
💌 Wordcount 5,160 💌 Chapter 1 of ?? [I might actually continue this bc I want to see where it goes but not a priority unless ppl like it]
Next chapter =>
After the Shiwabusa incident you thought most ability users left Yokohama but it turns out someone is hunting down the surviving few. It's the reason why the special divisions unit Ango is a part of reached out to the ADA. There had been missing people cases flooding his desk, all with one thing in common. Every last one of them had been ability users. This didn't seem like the work of the Decay of Angles or any other known organization on record. It didn't line up with their past methods and ideologies. Plus Dazai added that Fyodor would never be this sloppy. Most were taken in broad daylight with no concerns about witnesses.
Between Ranpo and Dazai, they were able to sniff out the new threat with ease but they still didn't have enough information to assume the motive behind the kidnappings. Ango could only give so much details to go on because the member of his team that was investigating this case also disappeared. The first priority would be to find the hostages. With that in mind Ranpo insisted on working alongside the remaining guild members and, for some reason Akutagawa. Your guess was that Mori sent him to reclaim some mafia members who vanished as well. Apparently Chuuya was also supposed to join the investigation but ended up being stuck overseas. Instead you were to partner with Dazai.
You and Dazai, Kunikida and Yosano, and Ranpo and Poe were on recognizance while Lucy, Kenji, Kyouka, and Junichiro were on rescue, leaving Atsushi and Akutagawa as a diversion first and foremost but if they can capture the culprits that's an added bonus. Despite splitting up, you, Dazai, Kunikida and Yosano ended up trapped in the same room. Not exactly trapped, you could use your ability to get out but you still needed info.
“This isn't looking good.” Kunikida said flipping through the radio frequencies. “The signals jammed.” He looked up at Dazai as he nodded. “They know we're here.”
“We walked into a trap” Dazai gritted his teeth. There was no way to warn the others. He pushed you out of the way frantically typing at the computer that you finally hacked into. You look back at the scattered files on the desk. You were kicking up dirt. So far you've found a comprehensive guide to all the missing people. Which you already had from Ango. The only difference is that this seemed like a test subject profile. The more you read through them the more you realized they really focused on the compatibility of certain abilities. That's when you smelled something alluring and you dropped everything.
Dazai heard the clattering and ignored it. He was pissed off. It felt like he was missing something glaringly obvious. He slammed his hand on the desk muttering under his breath.
“Anyone else find-” Dazai stopped mid sentence as he took in the sight infront of him. Kunikida and Yosano were looking at each other lovingly as they hastily stripped, and pulled the other close. That's when Dazai finally noticed the faint pink dust in the air. An ability?
“I know what they're trying to do.” You said standing in front of the distracted brunette. He snapped out of his stupor when you gripped his shirt. Your pupils were dilated and your breathing was ragged. Biting your lip, it took your last bit of sanity to not jump Dazai. You took a deep breath. “P-please touch me, before I can't think straight.” Your eyes were narrowing on his lips. The desire to kiss him while you fuck like rabbits was swirling in the pit of your stomach.
He reached out to touch your forearm but it didn't do anything to help clear your head. “Shit, you gotta be kidding me” You are trying to fight your impulses . Internally you moaned at the touch. Your head lulled forward pressing into his chest. You couldn’t describe it but something about his scent was luring you in. This is really bad. Dazai looked over to Yosano and Kunikida. They were being really lovey dovey and handsy. He gulped as he felt you unbuttoning his vest. He grabbed your hands to prevent you from undressing him further. “Stay with me (Y/N). What's their goal?”
“They,” you inhaled heavily “no I, want you to fuck a baby into me!”
Dazai blinked back at you dumbfounded. He took a step backwards, that's what he was afraid of. They were up against a sex pollen ability user and he was the only one not affected. He tried to push you away but he was conflicted, you had him pushed against the wall with your body. Dazai has had a soft spot for you that he never intended on tapping into. A crush? A sexual fantasy? He didn't want to explore it but here he was letting you paw at him while you stripped away your clothes. He's had dreams about this and now it's actually happening but it couldn't have been at a more inopportune time and place. Just staring into your horny hungry eyes already left him half hard and he cursed his body for reacting this way.
“Dazai don't you love me?” You cooed.
Love was a strong word, he would rather not think about but he was left at your mercy as you crashed your lips on his. He groaned into your mouth. This was the best and worst case scenario. Best because you are forcing yourself onto him and not someone else. He could only imagine the jealousy he would have felt if you ended up with any of his coworkers. Although this was the worst because he knows he’s not going to stop your advances. Slowly he slid down the wall and let you crawl into his lap. He couldn't say no to you. Dazai has always made sure to keep everyone at a distance but not you. His head and his heart couldn't be bothered to make decisions right now. He found his hands caressing you just as feverishly as you were feeling him. He should stop. Dazai was in his right mind you were not but your touch was intoxicating. He let you unzip his pants and set his member free. Dazai threw his head back as you fully engulfed him. You were so warm and wet with no prep needed, ready to take him in. This was wrong but it felt so right. Dazai has always found it easier to beg for forgiveness than ask for permission.
You were kissing his jawline and bouncing on him with such vigor he wasn't going to last much longer. You were both a mess and as he felt your walls shake around him he held you in place and finished you off with a thrust of his own. You both were spasming in bliss as he hit his climax. He had been too enthralled with his own pleasure; he forgot to think about why you all were here in the first place. He was about to ask you what it was you found when he felt you roll your hips again.
A jolt of pleasure washed over him as he gently held your hips from doing that again. He just came, he needed a minute. Dazai was easily overstimulated and he feared that he might not have a choice in a moment but while he still had the strength he needed to do something.
“But Dazai~” You whined into his ear “You need to fuck a baby into me! Once isn't going to cut it.” You struggled to move as he pinned you to the floor. He hoped with this new position you wouldn't be able to do that much damage before he was capable of another round. On the other side of the room he could hear Yosano and Kunikida still going at it. Sounds he really never wanted to hear from either of his colleagues. Dazai weighed out his options, grabbing for the files you dropped earlier. He dug out his phone. The signal was back, probably because they knew everyone would be incapacitated. He tried calling Ango to update him that the plan failed and everyone needs extracting now before the rest of you get captured.
—
When you finally came too you were exhausted and sticky with Dazai’s arms wrapped around you. You tried to push him away but his grip only tightened as he cried out “Aaahng~ Stop moving! I can't take anymore! Nghh~” He was trembling and breathing heavily like he was going to pass out.
“D-Dazai?” You don't remember anything past when you dropped the papers. You tried retracing your steps. It finally occurred to you that you were sitting flesh against Dazai’s lap, feeling the fullness of multiple rounds with his dick pulsing inside of you. You choked on a moan as you involuntarily clenched around him. The events of the evening were catching up with you. You had been begging Dazai to fuck you which is something you had always wanted to do but never had the guts to say. You've had a crush on him since you joined the agency but never tried to pursue a relationship with Dazai. Mostly because he was a massive flirt to most women. You would reciprocate his flirty jokes and he always gave you a look like no one's ever done that before. Playful banter aside you don't think it meant anything on Dazai’s end.
He whimpered in your ear again “hmmmng P-please don't move I swear I’ll explain. I just need a minute. You've been riding me for an hour I-” He was panting desperately trying to catch his breath. His fingers were digging into your skin to keep you as still as possible. “sex pollen user, couldn't stop it. Fuck”
You felt Dazai lift you up to pull out, gasping as his body slumped against the wall. You tried to move out of his lap but your legs were numb. Although the slight movement made you feel the cum dripping out of you. Your head was a mess. The words “you had sex with Dazai” were repeating like a mantra.
“I'm so sorry-” you had started to say but he grabbed your shoulders “It's not your fault. I could have stopped you at any point but I didn't know if we were being watched.” Which was true but definitely not the reason he didn't stop but you didn’t need to know that. “As soon as everyone was affected they stopped jamming the signal so I managed to have Ango send reinforcements. I should be the one apologizing for taking advantage of you.”
You were both at fault but not at fault. Net neutral you guess? You didn't dwell on it because you don't remember. Still you were embarrassed by everything. You know you weren't in control of your behavior but still. Dazai was being too dismissive about it. You wanted him to look at you disrespectfully. You understand that the mission comes first but you're still a woman. You have assets he should be ogling at. Like right now as your clothes were long forgotten about besides you.
As soon as you opened your mouth Ango and his men busted down the door. Apparently the rescue team managed to move all the hostages to Anne's room before the sex pollen hit the air and they were just waiting for it to dissipate. So the mission was not a complete failure like you thought. If anything you'd have to wait to see what Ranpo and Poe had discovered. All you were able to report was that they were trying to match make compatible ability users.
Ango tried helping you to your feet but your legs were unstable and you were back on the ground in a matter of seconds. It made getting redressed a challenge but Yosano was able to help. The doctor wasn't nearly as fucked out as you were but considering Dazai let you have your way with him it makes sense. Since your legs were still wobbly Dazai ended up carrying you out. This flustered you way more than the realization of having sex with your crush. His cum was currently inside you and somehow being princess carried was what made your head explode. You buried your face in his neck as you met up with the others. No one batted an eye except Ranpo who smirked and gave you a thumbs up.
On the bright side everyone seemed just as disheveled and out of it. You don't blame them either. Ranpo and Poe were probably just fine, you've always suspected that they were that close already but Poe was extremely skittish more so than usual. Both Atsushi and Akutagawa looked traumatized. Kunikida was in a similar state but Yosano didn't mind one bit. If anything, her being unfazed was unnerving everyone. Well everyone but Ranpo, Dazai and Akutagawa but you doubt Akutagawa would care even if he wasn’t so distraught at the moment. Whatever the case it was interesting watching everyone's reactions to whatever happened tonight. You were just glad that Lucy, Kyouka, Kenji and Junichiro didn't have to go through it.
By the looks of it the sex pollen user got away but Atsushi and Akutagawa did manage to tie up some goons for further questioning. After a quick debrief Yosano came up to you and pulled out a sealed tablet, instructing you to take it as soon as possible. A morning after pill, you assume. It suddenly clicked why she was so casual. Every time you've gone out drinking with Yosano she's always managed to go home with some attractive stranger. This was similar to one of her drunken escapes except this time Kunikida was the victim of her flirty advances. Poor Kunikida looks like he's about to kill himself for stepping outside of his ideals.
With everything seemingly done and dusted you all went home. Ango drove you all back to the dorms and you managed to walk to your room just fine. You were still haunted by the events you don't remember and you want to ask Dazai but then again maybe you don't. If you don't remember you could almost gaslight yourself into believing that it never happened. That way you could still preserve the idea that your first time with him will be special. Although based on the fact he dismissed it so easily, you don't think he finds you attractive in a sexual sense. Again you'll never know unless you talk to him but it's still embarrassing for you, but hey it could have been worse. Originally you were supposed to be on a different team had Chuuya not been overseas. Or maybe it was because Chuuya wasn't here that the ability user was able to incapacitate all of you. None of you were captured so it's fine.
Within the next few days everything went back to normal. Well close to normal, you still couldn't look Dazai in the eyes but you haven't partnered with him since that night. Currently you were with Kunikida and Atsushi for a mission. The boys have done most of the work but as you were finishing up one of the bastards tried to take you from behind. You dodged the initial attack but as you went to retaliate you froze. Your ability wasn't working. You ended up getting shot twice before Atsushi was able to get to you.
“My ability is gone, I can't feel it at all.” You coughed up blood holding your wounds. It wasn't fatal but you were losing blood and fast. Your vision was starting to sway as you were rushed to Yosano.
When you woke up you were in the infirmary at the agency. Atsushi was still getting checked out even though the tiger would ultimately heal any major injuries. As you sat up you felt the pain of the two bullet wounds. Normally Yosano would use her ability to fix it instead of letting you heal naturally. They both looked at you with a wary expression.
“Atsushi, can you check if Dazai’s done and send him in?”
He only nodded before scampering off. You tilted your head at why Dazai needed to be called in. Yosano sat next to you “How are you feeling? Are you able to use your ability now?”
You tried really hard but no dice. “I feel like I've definitely been shot twice but more unnerving I can't feel my ability at all. What's wrong with me?”
She nodded, handing you a cup. “I'll try to explain it if I can, but I need you to get me a urine sample. How long has it been since you ate?”
You looked at the clock you had breakfast at 9 and it was currently 4, whoops that means you skipped lunch. “About Seven hours?”
“I can give you painkillers after you get blood drawn. Not being able to feel your ability is throwing me a curveball so I want to make sure I check all my bases.”
“Okay.” You grabbed the cup and made your way to the bathroom. As you stepped out into the hallway you nearly bumped into Dazai, whose look of concern didn't go unnoticed but you only bowed slightly before you hurried off.
By the time you came back Dazai was already in the room. Yosano took the urine sample and walked into her office for a second before folding her arms across her chest. “There’s no eloquent way to put this and honestly as a doctor this is the grossest thing I've had to do but the reason why you can't use your ability is because Dazai’s sperm is probably still swimming around in your uterus.”
Your face started heating up as you stuttered “I-It's almost been a week how is that possible!”
Dazai hummed “Oh, so that's what the sample was for.”
Yosano rolled her eyes “Unfortunately” she frowned before she continued her explanation. “Technically it's only been five days and that's about the cut off for irregular sperm lifespans.” She walked back to her office and came back with two negative pregnancy tests. “I wasn’t too worried about the results since you took the contraceptive but it's my job to be thorough. You should be able to use your ability by tomorrow unless Dazai’s sperm is just as hard to kill as Dazai is.”
Dazai shrugged, “I'm just surprised this hasn't come up before. Back when I was-”
Yosano put her hand up “I don't need to hear the rest of that. It's bad enough we had sex ten feet away from each other.” Yosano looked back at you, “Until you get your ability back I won't be able to use my ability on you either. For now you'll have to heal your injuries the normal way.” You nodded.
Unfortunately as tomorrow came you still couldn't use your ability. You glared at Dazai who laughed at the situation. He was having a field day with how powerful his seed was. You haven't told the others what was going on but you're sure all the adults understood why you were out of commission. Kenji was the only one who kept asking questions you genuinely didn't know how to respond to. He was so innocent and Dazai was playing into it. This was killing you. How are you supposed to forget that night if it's all anyone is talking about. Not to mention that you were basically tied to your desk for the time being taking painkillers like candy.
A few more days later and to mostly Dazai’s surprise, since Yosano was out on a mission, you still couldn't manifest your ability. This was getting ridiculous. At first Dazai joked about it almost having a sense of pride but today he had been awfully quiet and no one likes a quiet Dazai.
You had been more tired than usual. The injuries were taking their toll so you got up to make some tea in the office kitchen to help you relax. Today was a fairly busy day for everyone, but you. The others were all coming and going but you were still confined to the office. It was a jarring situation, typically Dazai was the only one who had to heal like a normal human being. You sighed, pouring your tea.
“Still nothing?”
You turn around to see Dazai holding a small paper bag, leaning against the doorframe. You shook your head. “Still nothing.” You didn’t want to think about it but you set your tea down motioning to the bag he was holding “Is that what I think it is?” You took a pregnancy test the other day, Yosano gave you a pill, this really shouldn’t be happening. Actually, did you even take the pill? Thinking back you were exhausted and out of it and you remember drinking water and going to sleep but did you not actually take the pill? Your head was hurting just thinking about it.
“Only if you want it to be. I can throw it away if you'd prefer.” Dazai put the bag in his coat pocket as he approached you. “To be honest I'm not sure if I want you to find out either. Logically I doubt you are, because if you were, then your ability should have come back by now. My DNA would have turned into our child's DNA and the nullification should have stopped.” He stood next to you leaning back on the counter. “However if you somehow are, I fear it wasn’t just a sex pollen ability at play.” He grit his teeth yet another ability he wasn't able to negate the effects of.
You looked at him eyes wide. That was their true goal. “They were trying to breed ability users.” He nodded as he looked down.
“That's why they waited for us to show up. I have a feeling they were after one of our abilities. Which is probably why Ranpo paired you with me. A copycat ability is already strong as it is but in the wrong hands it would be astronomical.”
You swallowed hard “I don't know how I feel about this. I kinda don't want to know because if you're right then what? If I'm pregnant then somehow everyone is pregnant? How would that work for the guys? Would you want to keep the child, or wait if it's an ability, is it even possible to keep the child?” You looked at Dazai, he was clearly uncomfortable with your questioning. “I guess I should probably take it before I work myself up over nothing.” You held your hand out lowering your head, waiting for him to give you the test. He raised an eyebrow “Do you want moral support or?”
“Depends if it's positive are you going to go buy milk and never return?”
“No promises, I never planned on having kids.” He shrugged.
“No really? I'm surprised” you said sarcastically “I've always wanted kids but I don't think this is the right time.”
Dazai stood outside the bathroom while you paced back and forth. The wait was killing you. You still had a minute left. Grabbing the test you opened the door. “Dazai we're friends right?”
“I would say so. Why?” He gave you a quizzical look.
“I just wanted to make sure that you don't hate me? I don't know, that might change in a second.” You bite your lip as you flip the test over. Sure enough it was positive. Dazai leaned over your shoulder causing you to nearly drop it. “Well, I still don't hate you in case you were wondering. If anything I hate that what I speculated may be right to some degree. Which is more annoying than anything else.” Dazai's eyes narrowed thinking about, for lack of a better moniker, the anti-Fyodor. What were they trying to gain out of making more ability users?
Dazai didn't move and being in his proximity after finding out he did in fact fuck a child in to you, was making you dizzy. “I need to lay down”
You moved sluggishly as Dazai reached out and touched your shoulder “If you need anything just let me know. I'm the one who's responsible for all of this. I'm not going to make you do this alone.”
You both made your way to the couches in the waiting area as Ranpo came back from his mission. Dazai pulled him into the other room presumably to update him on the situation. That this “threat” isn't over and indeed was just the beginning.
You carefully laid on the couch your thoughts were scattered. On one hand you were glad it was Dazai but at the same time this just makes your relationship more complicated. As your eyes slowly close you realize you never actually drank your tea either. There was a good chance you forgot to take the pill too, it's probably still in the pocket of what you wore that night. Yawning you shifted to make yourself more comfortable. It had been hard sleeping the past few days but the pain has decreased significantly today. You were so lost in thought that you didn't even notice that Dazai draped his trench coat on your sleeping form. He stood there for a moment thinking about how cute you looked while you were sleeping.
He wondered if his kid would look as cute. Speaking of kid, he should probably check on Ranpo. Dazai only took a guess at who the other possible pregnant people were but knowing that Ranpo is often lazy and chooses to forego physical activity if he could help it, he wouldn't doubt for a second that he had Poe do all the work. As he walked into the bathroom Ranpo was already using his glasses to stare down at the pink piece of plastic. The detective frowned, discarding the spectacles.
“I blame you for this.” Ranpo showed the other the result. “This probably means Atsushi is also pregnant?” He took a deep sigh before adding “Things are about to get a lot more complicated.”
Dazai frowns. “No kidding.”
Ranpo smirks, opening his eyes to look at you on the couch before addressing Dazai again as he walks away. “Congratulations by the way.”
—
It had been about a month and morning sickness was no joke. You would rush to the bathroom midsentece if you even felt remotely queasy which was a stark difference to how the other two handled it. Ranpo had placed waste receptacles around the whole office but still ended up puking out the window once or twice because he couldn’t be bothered to move the three feet to use a bin. Atsushi on the other hand would grab a waste bin but would end up swallowing it half the time off of pure reflex because he didn't want to waste food. The first time you watched him do it you and Ranpo immediately grabbed for a bin. Today hadn't been too bad for the nausea but you might have spoken too soon. You watched Atsushi perk up standing up from his desk.
“Knock knock!” out of thin air a familiar yellow portal appeared at the entrance. Your favorite jester took a bow before he opened his cape to release who knows what into the office.
“Nikolai!” Atsushi was the first one to jump into action as the rest took a defensive stance waiting for a fight. Dazai pulled you behind him as Fyodor casually stepped through the overcoat. “Long time no see, Dazai.”
“Fyodor, why are you here?” It was more of a statement than a question.
The air was tense as Ranpo crossed his arms “Don’t tell me you're also pregnant!” Everyone looked shocked and waited for confirmation.
“I am and the child is an affront to god. That is why I've come to inquire your services. I require assistance with the abomination.” He motioned over to Kunikida “I made an appointment under a different name.”
Kunikida raised an eyebrow as he looked through the client meeting list and sure enough there was one scheduled for an ambiguous medical inquiry. “You came to get rid of the child?”
Gasping Fyodor looked taken aback. “Absolutely not, for a man to be pregnant is a miracle. Although most doctors are ill equipped to accommodate for the male anatomy.” He placed his hand over his stomach for emphasis.
Dazai rolled his eyes. “I thought you said it was an affront to god?” He crossed his arm clearly trying to upset the other.
Fyodor glared at Dazai. “It is but having an abortion is a worse sin than the child being born of wedlock. Nikolai will simply kill the child after they are baptized. I am here to take advantage of your doctor, as they are already overseeing male pregnancies.”
Atsushi was confused how Fyodor was even in the same situation to begin with but even more so now after hearing his reasoning for coming to the ADA. “Why don't you guys just get married? I don't know, it just sounds like a lot of work if you plan on killing the kid anyways.”
“Do you have any idea how difficult immigration can be? It is disgustingly time consuming to get married overseas.” Fyodor groaned “Not to mention the child will be a Japanese citizen while Nikolai is Ukrainian and they do not allow dual citizenship, it's all so messy.”
Ranpo walked up, putting a hand on Atsushi’s shoulder. “He's right you know, it's a massive pain in the ass.”
“Of course it's a pain in the ass we're here on work visas. I'm not dealing with immigration, I'm a terrorist not a psychopath.” Fyodor seemed to slump into Nikolai’s side as the white haired man held him upright “Dos-kun you should probably sit down.” the russian nodded and let Nikolai lead him into the waiting area.
Yosano looked over Kunikida's shoulder. “If they have an appointment I guess we should at least hear them out. Especially if what he says is true and he is with child.” This was all incredibly bizarre for everyone.
Dazai nodded “Fyodor wouldn’t make his presence known if he didn't have something up his sleeve. Any insight Ranpo?”
Ranpo had his glasses on and shrugged “It all checks out. He's not lying about genuinely coming here for medical attention but I suspect they were accidentally caught by the sex pollen. They probably had planned to wipe out as many ability users as possible but underestimated our opponents just as we did.”
You turned to go make tea but Dazai immediately grabbed your arm “I'll handle the tea. I don't want him getting too close to anyone just in case he tries to pull something.” His serious expression softened as he patted your head. “You should go rest for a bit too. You're still healing.” You nodded with a light blush on your cheeks.
#bsd imagines#bsd fanfic#bsd x reader#bsd dazai#dazai osamu x reader#dazai x reader#xreader#x reader#my bsd brainrot is showing#ada dazai#🍋#based on a dream I had
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Hiya friend!! I always love your little seasonal menu items it’s such a cute and fun idea and they’re GREAT
May I get a skk blueberry lemonade with baseball please? 🫐⚾️ (I also absolutely love baseball, I’m personally very biased towards catchers💛)
skk with lee chuuya preferably. either going to a game or OR hear me out: PM v ADA baseball game to idk strengthen the alliance or something
🍋 Lemonade Special Order 🍋
The PM vs ADA baseball game idea was SO SMART??? I absolutely had to go with that one - and I love how it turned out! 😂 Thank you for the brilliant idea!
~~~
“Hah! See that, Dazai? I made it to first base!” Dazai smirked at Chuuya, whose cheeks instantly matched his hair as he grumbled, “All right, all right. Shut up.”
When their respective bosses had decided to have an exhibition baseball game “just for fun” before the local teams started hogging the practice fields, neither side really knew what to make of the idea. Still, they’d all grudgingly come out to play…and to their surprise, found they were actually having a lot of fun, some minor scuffles and incidents aside, of course.
“I’m surprised you swung at all,” Dazai commented as he watched Higuchi come out from the Port Mafia’s dugout to bat. “You’re so small your strike zone is practically nonexistent. You could have just taken the walk.”
“Fuck off,” Chuuya snapped, shoving at him lightly before taking a foot off the bag and turning his gaze back to the game.
“You’re not going to lead?”
“Not with you playing first baseman.”
“Oh, come on, what do you think I’m gonna do?” Dazai chuckled, shoving at him lightly. “You’ll need all the help you can get to make it to second base, chibi~”
Chuuya shot him a withering stare, though his blush was not lost on the detective. “Shut up.”
“Go on,” the brunette teased, poking the mafioso’s side. “Just a step or two.”
“Don’t,” Chuuya grunted, trying to cover up a snicker. Then he yelped and instinctively tried to shimmy away as Dazai pinched him with more insistence. “Asshole, I have to get back on the bag before your guy pitches again – let me back!”
Dazai conceded and allowed him to tag the base again before Tanizaki wound up for his next pitch, but as soon as that was done, he wiggled a finger into Chuuya’s hip, forcing him off the base again with a slew of giggles.
“Dahahahahazai!” Chuuya watched as Higuchi swung and missed, fighting his way back to the base even as the detective abandoned his glove, grabbed onto his ribs, and started tickling with purpose. “Ahahahahaha, fuhuhuhuhuhuck, stop it! We’re in the mihihihihiddle of something – Dazai!”
Another couple of pitches later, Higuchi struck out, ending the half inning. Chuuya sagged in relief when Dazai let him go, then caught himself and shouted, “Just wait until you make it to third base, bastard! I’ll show you!”
Then he realized what he’d said, and how loud he’d said it, and he slapped a hand over his mouth as if it could take the words back.
On his way past him to get his glove for the outfield, Akutagawa muttered, “Keep your private lives to yourselves, sir.”
Dazai laughed hysterically the entire way back to the Armed Detective Agency’s dugout.
#fanfiction#tickle drabble#coffee shots#lemonade event#bungo stray dogs#bsd#dazai osamu#chuuya nakahara#soukoku#playful#tickling#ticklish#tickle#i loved the idea of them all playing a game so much omg#i didn't intend for the base jokes to be in it originally but like - hello opportunity??? 😂
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𒀭﹒my sunshines ! ⊹
these arent all my moots, these are just the ones that came over to my page 🤍 feel free to comment if you wanna change your emoji!!
the harem (most of them are writers pls check them out!!)
@itgirlgyu / @itgirlhub (nsfw) — chewy my gum 🫧
@itz-yerin — yerin baby ☃️
@hsgwrld (enha) / @chnlez (nct + skz) — my nutmeg 👹
@ywnsthetic — mist my love 🐳
@syrxiee2 — gigi 🍭
@seolboba — koko 🧋
@banggyu0308 — mommy ada 🍑💦
@aistarz — ai my sky 😻
@jaehunnyy — my cookie chip 🦄
@subbyjvnnie — raves 🥞
@full-moonies — trixie my yoghurt 🌸
the sweethearts
@mintxts — big sister minxy 🦋
@soirei / @chwnvr (chaewon rp acc) — ate chelsss
@multi-stan-jenny — lilla katten 💎
@heetoldme — paris 🥟
@wnfsd — lita bear
@ashxxgyu — ashyyy 🥀
@dawniebear — dawnie 🐸
@c0rn3rst0ne — kiera 🍓
@rapmonkive — rm 🐨
@hueningplushie — lilylove
@decaf-flamingo — catnip 🦩
@iheartsimjaeyun — libby 🍉
@j0swhiterice — evee 🍚
@fairy-of-sugar — sugar 🪻
@xikerscentral — mel 🪼
@aeins-archive — my sweetheart aein 🩰
@soluvcore — honeybun 🪽
@soobunnii — angel 🐙
the crackheads (but still sweethearts)
@zombiekidwithraggedyfrills — fanny 🍨
@pop-roxs — water ❤️🔥
@apple-brees — bree 🐺
@aistarz — ai my sky 😻
writers i look up to (pls read at least one of their fics i promise you wont regret it)
tbh i still dont get why they followed me back 😭
@hangyeomcult — chai 🐈⬛
@cathyun — rin bebe ko 🌠
@hoes4hoseok — piper 🐝
@love4heejayke — babi 🌙
@04yangz — mel 💌
anons
😇, 🧸 (where are you i miss you ㅠㅠ), 🍋
tumblr wont let me put more than 30 tags 💔
#◟🫧 ˒ chewy my gum ᰈ#◟☃️ ˒ yerin my baby ᰈ#◟👹 ˒ my nutmeg ᰈ#◟🐳 ˒ mist my love ᰈ#◟🍭 ˒ gigi ᰈ#◟🧋 ˒ koko ᰈ#◟🍑💦 ˒ mommy ada ᰈ#◟😻 ˒ ai my sky ᰈ#◟🦄 ˒ my cookie chip ᰈ#◟🥞 ˒ raves ᰈ#◟🌸 ˒ trixie my yoghurt ᰈ#◟🦋 ˒ big sister minxy ᰈ#◟♡ ˒ ate chelsss ᰈ#◟💎 ˒ lilla katten ᰈ#◟🥟 ˒ paris ᰈ#◟♡ ˒ lita bear ᰈ#◟🥀 ˒ ashyyy ᰈ#◟🐸 ˒ dawnie ᰈ#◟🍓 ˒ kiera ᰈ#◟🐨 ˒ rm ᰈ#◟♡ ˒ lilylove ᰈ#◟🦩 ˒ catnip ᰈ#◟🍉 ˒ libby ᰈ#◟🍚 ˒ evee ᰈ#◟🪻 ˒ sugar ᰈ#◟🪽 ˒ honeybun ᰈ#◟🐙 ˒ angel ᰈ#◟🍨 ˒ fanny ᰈ#◟❤️🔥 ˒ water ᰈ#◟🐺 ˒ bree ᰈ
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¡! Itoshi Rin [Blue Lock] x SMR¡!
Disclaimer: ditulis oleh Muneyuki Kaneshiro dan diilustrasikan oleh Yūsuke Nomura
Genre : 🍋🍋🍋🍋
˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥
POV' penulis :
Suara peluit berbunyi. Pertandingan u20 japan vs blue lock telah berakhir. Nampak kemenangan besar di tangan blue lock. Termasuk dua itoshi yang pada akhirnya mereka kembali seperti semula. Saling tak bertegur sapa. Namun pada akhirnya Sae mengakui Rin meski sedikit. Dan membuat Rin bertekad mengalahkan kakaknya lagi dalam duel selanjutnya.Setelah semua selesai rin kembali ke loker tempat ia untuk berganti pakaian saat sampai dia bertemu (M/n) di sana yang kini bersandar di pintu ruang ganti pemain.
"Yo Rin selamat atas kemenanganmu"kekehnya "Tcih..untuk apa kau kemari. Idiot,"
"Hee...bagaimana yah aku kemari ingin mengucapkan selamat apa itu tak boleh?"seringainya
"Aku tak butuh ucapan selamat darimu. Minggir aku mau.Menahan tanganmu.
"(M/n) lepaskan aku bangsat!!"
"Tidak. Apa kamu lupa janjimu. Saat pergi untuk ke blue lock"
"I i itu... ck aku lupa itu,"ucapnya memalingkan muka
"Lupa apa pura pura lupa hm?,"ucap (M/n) mengambil dagu rin dan langsung melumatnya ..pergerakan rin di batasi dengan tubuh (M/n) yang mengunci pergerakan rin
"Hmmpphh..."desah rin menikmati permainan ritme lidah (m/n) yang nampak begitu lihai. Tangan nya bergerak masuk ke dalam celana olga rin...dengan nakalnya jari jari panjang itu menjelajahi holenya. Lalu memasuki satu persatu
"Hngghh?!!" Desah rin merasa ada sesuatu yang memasuki ruang sensitifnya. Merasa menemukan sesuatu di sana. (M/n) menabrakan jarinya dan menekanya.
"NGGHHH!!..." desah Rin
'Sialan!!!..(m/n) bangsat!!'umpat Rin dalam hati. Meski dia mengumpat namun tubuh nya berkata lain Rin semakin menggoyangkan pinggulnya di tengah-tengah sesi keintiman mereka membuat mereka semakin bergairah.(M/n) terus mengeluarkan dan memasukan jarinya. Hingga Rin mencampai klimaks dan cum.
"ANGGHH~ahh..ah,"desahnya bersamaan dengan dirinya cum. Rin nampak terengah-engah belum sempat Rin menarik nafas dirinya di hentakan oleh penis (M/n) yang begitu besar "Akhh!!~"desah Rin terhentak hingga air liurnya keluar. Nipple nya bergesekan dengan lemari loker membuat lidahnya terjulur karena terangsang. Di tambah (M/n) yang masih menghentak dan memainkan Penis Rin dengan tangannya.
"Nyahh~ (M/n) more,"desah Rin (M/n) masih mempertahankan tempo kecepatanya. Namun itu tak bertahan lama (M/n) menaiki tempo kecepatan nya. Yang membuat nya semakin bernafsu.
"ANGHH~♡...."desah Rin merasa prostatnya di permainkan oleh tumbukan (M/n). (M/n) juga merasa begitu dia merasa hole Rin menjepitnya membuat nya mencapai klimak. Sentakan berikutnya membuat penis (M/n) membesar dan kemudian cum . Bersamaan Rin yang juga cum Rin merasa dirinya di isi penuh oleh sperma milik (M/n). Rasa hangat menjalar di perutnya.
"hah..hah..hah..bajingan!!!""Hahahah..hah..tapi kau menikmati rinrin,"kekehnya
"Urusaii...hummp,"ucapnya memerah dan memalingkan wajahnya dari (M/n) sang empu menangkup dagu Rin kemudian mengecupnya serta melumatnya.
"Hmppn..."leguhnya menikmati lumatan yang di berikan (M/n) sambil memejamkan mata.
"Aku mencintaimu Rin. Aku sudah menunggu mu lama,"ucap (M/n) menyatukan dahinyabke dahi RinPada akhirnya Rin berani menatap (M/n) kemudian
"Ck..aku juga mencintaimu,idiot."Terkekeh...(M/n)
"Imutnya..Rinrinku. Arigatou telah menerimaku,"ucap (M/n)
Rin pun ikut tersenyum melihat (M/n) tersenyum meski wajah nya masih memerah.
"Ya...idiot"
Tbc....
Omake:
***
Nampak para pemain blue lock mulai kembali dan kini berjalan di lorong. Pintu terbuka menampilkan gagamaru yang membuka pintu.
"Waah!! Maaf aku menganggu kalian,"
Membuat (M/n) dan Rin loading.
"Oi,ada apa gagamaru. Kenapa kau menutup pintunya,"ucap Jingo Raichi kesal
"Sst...dua orang sedang memandu cinta,"ucap Gagamaru membuat teman temanya menimbulkan tanda tanya.
"Ha?,"beo Raichi yang tak bisa memahami perkataan gagamaru.
"Ck💢, minggir gagamaru,"ucap Reichi karena ke habisan kesabaran begitu ia buka pintunya ia tutup kembali.
"Yoss...ayo kita kembali,"
"Oi,memangnya ada apa di dalam,"ucap king Barou yang sedari tadi diam memperhatikan.
Bersamaan suara desahan Rin yang terdengar sampai luar.
"Ah..kau benar. kita Kembali saja,"
"Ku harap jinpachi sensei,tak melihat melalui cctv,"ucap Chigiri
"Benar,hahaha..mengingat ia memasang markas blue lock..full cctv,"ucap Isagi canggung.
Sedangkan jinpachi hanya diam menyaksikan apa yang terjadi di dalam loker.
"Dasar...tak sabaran,"gumamnya
#itoshi rin x seme male reader#bluelock#Lemon#reader#malereader#sememalereader#xreader#xsememalereader#xmalereader
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kinlist
[name || source || tag || quote || who i’m looking for || (other)]
shota aizawa/eraserhead || boku no hero academia || #SA - 💤 || “there’s nothing crueler than letting a dream end midway.” || hizashi yamada/present mic, oboro shirakumo/loud cloud, nemuri kayama/midnight, toshinori yagi/all might, eri, and hitoshi shinsou. any of my other students are also welcome
hizashi yamada/present mic || boku no hero academia || #HY - 🎤 || “going the battler route? i have a hard time picturing it.” || same as above, minus hizashi, plus shota
hubris nestoris || songs of war || #HN - 🍋 || “in this war, it was you who turned the tides.” || any members of the knights of ardonia, particularly grek and senn, but again, any sourcemates are cool || (yes i kin a minecraft man deal with it)
reki kyan || sk8 the infinity/sk∞ || #RK - ☀️ || “no one knows the answer to the meaning of happiness.” || langa and miya in particular, but like all the previous ones, all sourcemates are cool with me
langa hasegawa || sk8 the infinity/sk∞ || #LH - ❄️ || “i wanna infinitely skate together with you!” || all sourcemates
ryomen sukuna || jujutsu kaisen || #RS - ⚡ || “know your place, fool.” || any & all sourcemates are welcome to interact
kai || bubble || #K - 🫧 || “with our blue blazes, we’re gonna burn it all down!” || looking for all of team blue blazes (ie hibiki, uta, isozaki, usagi, osawa, shin & makoto). other teams are welcome to interact too
pip fitz-amobi || a good girl’s guide to murder || #PFA - 🔎 || “i’m not sure i’m the good girl i once thought i was. i’ve lost her along the way.” || i’d love to meet any ravis! cara & naomi as well. any elliots dni
love thorsdottir || mcu (thor : love and thunder) || #LT - 🫶 || mainly looking for gorr, thor and loki :)
kusuo saiki || the disastrous life of saiki k. || #KS - 🍮 || “good grief. ordinary people sure are a pain.” || mostly looking for my parents and brother (kuniharu, kurumi and kusuke) riki nendou, shun kaidou, reita toritsuka, aren kuboyasu and mikoto aiura.
inosuke hashibira || kimetsu no yaiba || #IS - ⚔️ || “if there ain’t no hell, i’ll goddamn make one for you.” || i’d like to meet anyone from the kamaboko squad & any of the pillars. other sourcemates are welcome too.
jiji || kiki’s delivery service || #JJ - 🍁 || “…if you wake up tomorrow and find a white cat, that’s me.” || looking for anyone really
luna || sailor moon || #L - 🌙 || “you can’t keep depending on others.” || mainly looking for the inner & outer senshi and artemis
keisuke suga || weathering with you || #KS - 🌦️ || “the world’s crazy. always has been, always will be.” || hodaka morishima, hina & nagi amano, moka, asuka & natsumi suga
osamu dazai || bungo stray dogs || #OD - ⛓️ || “justice is a weapon. it can be used to cause harm, but it cannot protect or save others.” || anyone from the ada, chuuya nakahara, ango sakaguchi, and sakunosuke oda
chuuya nakahara || bungo stray dogs || #CN - 🗝️ || tba
——————————————
kinsidering
kaina tsutsumi/lady nagant || boku no hero academia
keigo takami/hawks || boku no hero academia
viktor || arcane
brom holcombsson || eragon (book ver.)
——————————————
separate posts will be made for my timelines too
last updated: 28/01/2023
#my stuff#kinlist#SA - 💤#HY - 🎤#HN - 🍋#RK - ☀️#LH - ❄️#RS - ⚡#K - 🫧#PFA - 🔎#LT - 🫶#KS - 🍮#IH - ⚔️#JJ - 🍁#L - 🌙#KS - 🌦️#OD - ⛓️#CN - 🗝️
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Lemon(ada) cake by u/Juraprinzessin
Lemon(ada) cake 🍋💛
https://ift.tt/50RmFou
post link: https://ift.tt/AIgKU8E
author: Juraprinzessin
submitted: May 04, 2024 at 08:24PM via SaintMeghanMarkle on Reddit
disclaimer: all views + opinions expressed by the author of this post, as well as any comments and reblogs, are solely the author's own; they do not necessarily reflect the views of the administrator of this Tumblr blog. For entertainment only.
#SaintMeghanMarkle#harry and meghan#meghan markle#prince harry#fucking grifters#Worldwide Privacy Tour#Instagram loving bitch wife#Backgrid#voetsek meghan#walmart wallis#markled#archewell#archewell foundation#megxit#duke and duchess of sussex#duke of sussex#duchess of sussex#doria ragland#rent a royal#sentebale#clevr blends#lemonada media#archetypes with meghan#invictus#invictus games#Sussex#WAAAGH#american riviera orchard#Juraprinzessin
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🍋Lem & Ada🍋
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okay but this gives sucking him off in a chair vibes, like while he's doing work or something-
and it'd started just with you giving him a blowjob, but before you know it you're in his lap and you're cockwarming him, him testing your patience until you both simultaneously crack, and then you're riding him in the chair (until you both realize its not very comfortable, and move to the bed) and he's just fucking you so rough and fjvbgjtngjtn
"baby just couldn't wait, could she?"
FUCKDJDJD YOU’RE KILLING ME yeonjun gripping your thighs and your waist while you cockwarm him he’s trying so hard not to thrust up into you and fuck you hard right then and there 😳 good thing you have a bed to retreat to~
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I FORGOT ABOUT THIS AND THATS THE VER I GOT IMAGINE IF THEY DID IM GONNA DRIVE MYSELF CRAZY SAYING THEY DID (everyone saying theirs had fingerprints and mine did not 💀)
I STILL HAVE HOPES THAT THEY PACKAGED MINE whether they did or not i still got tyun's signed postcard in my farewell version 😏
#pls i will use any opportunity to flex that i have taehyun's autograph#i wish mine had fingerprints too tho 😔#ada 🍋
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ADA Dazai x Reader
💌Obligatory sex pollen fic I guess?? chapter 2💌
Summary: Certain abilities Dazai can dispel outright without touching the user. This has always confused the brunette greatly where the technical line was drawn. During Q's apocalypse, he couldn't bring individuals back to their senses but with Shiwabusa's fog he could prevent Chuuya’s ability from manifesting. Apparently this “Sex pollen” ability was more like the former example. Which left Dazai the only one conscious of their actions as everyone fucked like rabbits.
Notes: Based on a dream I had a few nights ago....This chapter is shorter because I started waking up once I realized it was THAT DREAM, I'm literally crying it got a second chapter some one help😭
Contains: sex pollen, dubcon, pregnancy, mpreg, pregnant Fyodor, Fyodor being painfully religious, 🍋 in chapter 1
💌 Wordcount 1,971 💌 Chapter 2 of ?? [If I have another dream I am obligated to update this] <= Previous chapter
Just like that for a few weeks everything was back to some semblance of normalcy. Out of sight out of mind you guess. Once you stopped feeling sick all the time you could hardly tell you were pregnant at all. You were still confined to the office since it would take anywhere from 3 to 6 months to fully heal from your injuries but that was fine with you. Honestly you don’t understand how Dazai does it. You've been pampered by Yosano's ability. It didn't even occur to you that you'd still have to have some sort of physical therapy afterwards either. Meanwhile Dazai gets shot and stabbed all the goddamn time and he takes it like a champ. Just one more reason to like him you guess.
Dazai looked up to catch you staring. You didn’t look away but your face did start to feel warm. You hadn’t really sat down and talked about it in depth yet. That night or about the child and honestly no one in the office has really tried to bring it up either. Although you still don't know what to say, sooner or later someone has to say something and hopefully it won't have to be you. Unfortunately you have a feeling it's going to be you.
Dazai glanced at the door and frowned. He's been trying to avoid any meaningful confrontation but judging from the sounds outside he swallowed. He knew those footsteps better than anyone and it was only a matter of time before “he” showed up. This might as well be happening today. Without warning Chuuya emerged from the doorway looking annoyed.
“Okay, which one of you is the weretiger!”
Atsushi hesitantly raised his hand. You raised an eyebrow at the exchange. What was the mafia executive doing looking for Atsushi? Dazai sighed and rose to his feet, putting an arm around Atsushi as Chuuya approached the two.
“Why Chuuya, what brings you out to our domain! I almost didn't see you there, have you gotten shorter?” He smiles cheerfully. You swear you could see flowers and sparkles surrounding him.
Chuuya crossed his arms “Go to hell and wait your turn. I have a bone to pick with you after I square away business with the tiger boy.” He glared at Atsushi, sizing him up. “And you, my boy Akutagawa hasn't been the same since your guy's little rescue operation. Mind telling me why that is?” It was surprisingly less threatening and more of a genuine question.
Atsushi’s face flushed a few shades darker “Why don't you ask him! He's the one who-” He stopped mid sentence, groaning. He figured Akutagawa wouldn't talk about it to anyone either but being asked directly because Akutagawa was out of sorts was insulting. How did he think Atsushi felt? “You know what, the bottom line is I'm pregnant and it's his fault he used his stupid ability like that. If anything I should be the one who's traumatized!”
Chuuya hummed, putting his hand under his chin as he thought about an earlier encounter. “Oh so that's why he was muttering about being bound to the weretiger. He was saying something about not even holding hands yet and having to marry you. Guess that makes me the godfather for two babies then.” the redhead shrugged like this conversation was an everyday occurrence.
Atsushi slouched, was this karma for trying to suggest that Fyodor and Nikolai should get married?
“Don’t tell me Akutagawa is religious too.”
Chuuya furrowed his eyebrows. “What? No listen kid, this is about stepping up to responsibilities. Raising a kid's a big deal.” He looked over at Dazai with a smirk about to add one more thing but Dazai interjected, flicking the brim of Chuuya's hat.
He continued to wave his hand in the other's face. “Who said you were the godfather? I don't remember calling you.” Both of their expressions went flat for a moment as they glared at each other passively.
“You should have, it would have been better to hear the news from you than from Mori.” He huffed “Why didn't you? It's not like you to go back on your word. What happened too, I wouldn't lie about something like this.” He mocked in a Dazai like fashion.
“I thought you were too drunk to remember that!” Dazai whined.
“Yeah well I also remember promising to be your best man if you ever lived long enough to find someone.” Chuuya leaned back into his hip “So?” the redhead crossed his arms, waiting.
“So what?” Dazai said matter of factly. As the two stared back at each other, Atsushi finally sat down. Why did they have to do this at his desk?
“So what? You're not even going to introduce me!”
Dazai rolled his eyes. Is that really what Chuuya came here for? When Chuuya walked in you had gotten up from your desk to make tea. As you brought the cups over Dazai walked around you and put his hand on your shoulder “(Y/N), Chuuya, Chuuya, (Y/N). There, you happy?”
“Wait (Y/N)? You mean your-” Dazai cut him off but Chuuya looked surprised. You wonder what he was going to say. It sounded important.
Dazai pankicked and grabbed the other from behind covering his mouth as he dragged him out into the hallway. “Nope that's it you overstayed your welcome.”
Once the door shut Ranpo pouted “I'm pregnant too ya know. I wouldn't mind Mr. Fancy hat being the godfather.” He puffed out his cheeks.
Atsushi rolled his eyes. “That's all you got from that!”
Ranpo sighed “No, I also got the image of Akutagawa tying you up so thanks for that.”
Atsushi stood up so fast his chair nearly fell over. “How can everybody speak about it so casually!”
He looked over to you with pleading eyes. Atsushi was probably hoping you'd back him up. Instead you laughed, handing him the disregarded tea.
“Well for starters only the adults are here today and the more you talk about it the less power it has.” You handed the detective another cup. “Although instead of putting you on the spot Ranpo should have asked if you wanted to talk about it first or at least opened up about his experience.”
He took a sip of tea before shrugging. Ranpo didn't mind sharing at all in fact he’s glad someone asked about it. “Not much to say really. Poe hugged me from behind and by the time I realized he wasn't doing it to be cute I just kinda went with it.” Ranpo shrugged with a smile on his face. “I'm more curious what happened with Kunikida!”
The blonde tensed as you set the last cup down in front of him. He had stopped his typing as a bead of sweat dripped down the side of his face. “Do I have too?” Out of everyone in the office Kunikida had been the one trying the hardest to skirt around the conversations. He wanted to forget it ever happened. It was bad enough that Dazai would tease him about it whenever they were alone.
Ranpo hummed “Akiko's really careful because she could never give up drinking for that long, so since you're not forced into being a dad, dealer's choice?” You all nodded in agreement, it only seemed fair since you were putting him on the spot.
Kunikida pushed up his glasses. You assume he probably doesn't want to share. Instead he turns to address you. “Which reminds me, I thought Yosano gave you a contraceptive too?”
“I was so exhausted I forgot it was in my pocket and never took it.” You frowned. It didn't feel like a priority in the moment but like most of them you were out of it. “But forced parenting aside, right now this is about sexual trauma.”
Kunikida cleared his throat “I wouldn't know what to share. I turned to look at Yosano and the next thing I know we're kissing in a passionate manner.” He paused wondering if he should say something about the elephant in the room. “Also this should go without saying, but no one is forcing you to be a parent. Ranpo and Atsushi might not have a choice but there's still plenty of time for you to think it over. No one would stop you if you decided you're not ready to be a mother.” This was true but your mind was already made up.
Somehow only Ranpo knew of your crush? You thought it was fairly obvious. Had it been anyone else you probably would have gotten rid of it by now.
Ranpo laughed before you could answer, sharing his two cents. “Who said I don't have a choice? I'm choosing to have this little munchkin! This is a once in a lifetime opportunity to see what me and Poe create. Besides, I've always wanted a mini me!” He patted his stomach proudly.
Atsushi sipped on his tea “That's true. So in a weird way it kind of worked out for you and Poe huh. At least one of us lucked out.” He’s been avoiding Akutagawa as much as possible ever since that night.
Ranpo snickered, “I would say two of us lucked out.” He draped one around your shoulder opening his eyes to give you a smug look. “Well you care to share with the class? This was your idea after all.”
So that’s why he bothered to bring all of this up. You sighed in defeat. “Lucked out my ass!” Your cheeks were red as Atsushi and Kunikida gave you incredulous looks “Keep in mind Dazai was fully conscious of his actions. He kind of just let me get it out of my system in hope that I would eventually snap out of it,” You groaned hiding your face in your hands “and yes, apparently I was begging him to fuck a baby into me. Is that what you wanted to hear, Ranpo!”
Ranpo blinked a few times “You didn't have to go that far but yeah I was just trying to get you to mention your crush on Dazai.”
“You have a crush on Dazai?!” Both Atsushi and Kunikida shouted. Kunikida nearly spat out his tea. You groaned “That’s why I was planning on keeping the child but I feel like I'd be baby trapping him.”
“It’s not baby trapping if you decide to keep the child, it's your body. I already told you that you have the final say.”
Everyone slowly turned their heads back to see Dazai coming back into the office. You swallowed “How much of that did you hear?”
“Not much but you already told me your reason for wanting to keep the kid.” He shrugged nonchalantly and everyone wiped their heads back to you.
Atsushi was dumbfounded. “Wait a second, let me get this straight. He knows that you-”
Dazai spoke over him. “-Always wanted kids, it's not that big of a deal. Unless that's not what we're talking about?” He tilted his head to the side. Did he miss something? It took a lot out of him to turn Chuuya away especially after the stupid slug made his own revelations about the situation.
You released the breath you were holding. Everyone else understood Dazai was just as oblivious to your feelings as always. Eventually you would have to tell him but it was still early enough in the process to figure that out. At least everyone else in the office knew why you’ve been acting weird since that night.
Kunikida groaned at the realization. “I don't know if I can handle a mini Ranpo running around, let alone a mini Dazai.” He went back to his work. “It’s bad enough having to work with Dazai as is.”
You laughed as the two tried to defend themselves.
#bsd imagines#bsd fanfic#bsd dazai#bsd x reader#dazai x reader#dazai osamu x reader#my bsd brainrot is showing#x reader#based on a dream i had#i can't believe this got a chapter 2
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Apa sih DETOKSIFIKASI itu?
(Tulisan Ummu Hasna yang sempat hilang)
Detoksifikasi tidak seperti yang kebanyakan orang pikirkan selama ini
🍶🍷🥃🫖 Orang sering berpikir, kalau kita mengoleskan atau memasukkan zat tertentu ke dalam tubuh, maka kita bisa mendetoksifikasi tubuh kita. Ini tidak benar.
Tidak ada yang bisa diterapkan pada tubuh untuk detoksifikasi tubuh. Hanya tubuh yang dapat mendetoksifikasi dirinya sendiri. Ini sangat penting untuk dipahami.
Tubuh yang mengambil semua tindakan.
Apa yang bisa kita lakukan adalah menempatkan kondisi pada tempatnya untuk mengangkat beban yang cukup dari tubuh sehingga tubuh dapat memulai mekanisme detoksifikasi.
🍎🍉🥝🫒🍊🥬🥒🥑🥕🍅 Banyak orang, mulai beralih ke diet makanan mentah ketika mereka sakit parah; beberapa melakukannya ketika mereka berusaha untuk pulih dari gejala penyakit ringan yang mengganggu; dan yang lain lagi membuat perubahan ketika mereka bebas dari gejala.
Dalam semua kondisi ini, begitu tubuh mulai mengasimilasi proporsi yang lebih tinggi dari makanan mentah alami, ia akan memulai tindakan detoksifikasi dan pembangunan kesehatan karena tubuu selalu berusaha untuk membangun kondisi kesehatan yang lebih tinggi.
🍋🍐🍏🍈🍑🥭🍍🥦🫐 Makanan mentah hidup yang segar dan aktif secara enzimatis, dengan gulanya yang bergizi dan berenergi menyebabkan tubuh beraksi, memanfaatkan sebagian besar energinya untuk membersihkan "rumahnya" dan memperbaiki dirinya sendiri; membersihkan kotoran, membuang sel-sel tua yang lebih rapuh, dan menggunakan nutrisi mentah yang segar untuk membangun tubuh yang benar-benar baru dan lebih sehat.
Transisi sebaiknya dilakukan secara bertahap, untuk menghindari memicu gejala tidak nyaman yang dapat menyertai proses pembersihan drastis.
Selama ada vitalitas (Energi), maka akan ada kesempatan bagi tubuh untuk meremajakan ke tingkat kesehatan yang jauh lebih kuat. Hasilnya sering terlihat dalam waktu 24 jam setelah memulai cara hidup baru yang sehat.
👣 Detoksifikasi adalah PROSES PEMURNIAN DIRI yang dilakukan tubuh setiap saat, 24/7
Gejala apapun yang diciptakan tubuh adalah respon positif terhadap upaya pembersihan dan perbaikan.
Tubuh kita akan melepaskan sel-sel yang lemah, rusak dan sekarat untuk menciptakan dan menggantinya dengan sel-sel baru yang sehat. Ini adalah bagaimana tubuh menyembuhkan dan beregenerasi. Tubuh akan menggunakan setiap lubang yang mungkin ditemukannya sebagai jalur eliminasi (mata, telinga, hidung, mulut, dll).
Gangguan gejala timbul dari kemacetan lendir pada sistem limfatik yang merupakan hasil dari pola makan dan gaya hidup toksik selama ini, mulai dari produk susu, gula rafinasi, gula kompleks dan protein asing, bahan kimia, 0b@t, kecanduan makanan olahan, produk kebersihan tubuh dan rumah tangga dll., logam dari peralatan masak, polusi industri, dll, dll.
Kelemahan seluler disebabkan oleh acidosis, kongesti, dan inflamasi yang luas.
Krisis penyembuhan atau healing crisis atau gejala detoks bisa terjadi saat kongesti (lendir, bahan kimia, dll.) dilepaskan. Krisis penyembuhan juga bisa muncul dalam penguatan dan penyembuhan kelemahan kita. Mereka bukan untuk ditakuti.
Gejala detoks sebagian besar lebih seperti gejala pilek dan flu.
Dan mereka yang paling sakit (kronis) lebih sering mengalami gejala yang paling kuat.
🥭🍒🥭🍑 Durasi gejala bisa berjam-jam, berhari-hari atau berminggu-minggu dan bervariasi dari satu orang ke orang berikutnya. Tapi, insya Allah MEREKA AKAN LULUS karena begitulah cara tubuh menyembuhkan dan beregenerasi secara alami.
🥬🥒🥕🥗 Ada banyak cara alami yang bisa membantu meredakan gejala sementara. Jika memang merasa gejala terlalu sulit untuk dikendalikan, dapat memperlambat detoks dengan mengkonsumsi jus sayuran atau kaldu sayur, sayuran kukus, atau tetap mendukung gejala tsb dengan banyak tidur dan intake cairan.
Pilihan terserah pada MASING-MASING....
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𝗠𝗔𝗡𝗙𝗔𝗔𝗧𝗞𝗔𝗡 𝗔𝗜𝗥 𝗛𝗜𝗗𝗥𝗢𝗚𝗘𝗡 𝗨𝗡𝗧𝗨𝗞 𝗟𝗘𝗕𝗜𝗛 𝗦𝗜𝗛𝗔𝗧 𝗗𝗔𝗡 𝗟𝗘𝗕𝗜𝗛 𝗛𝗜𝗗𝗨𝗣 𝗟𝗔𝗠𝗔 💦💧💦💧💦💧💦💧👨👩👧👨👩👧👨👩👧👨👩👧👨👩👧
Apakah Air Hidrogen❓
Air Hidrogen Adalah Air Tulen Yang Diperkayakan Dengan Tambahan MOLEKUL HIDROGEN (H2) Adalah Molekul Paling Banyak Di Alam Semesta. Ia Adalah Gas Yang Tidak Berbau, Tidak Berwarna Dan Hambar.
Pada Tahun 2007 Terdapat Satu Pasukan Di Jepun Menemukan Bahawa Gas Hidrogen Yang Terhirup Boleh Berfungsi Sebagai ANTIOKSIDAN Dan Dapat Melindungi OTAK Daripada RADIKAL BEBAS YANG BAHAYA.
Ini Mencetuskan Minat Di Rantau Dunia Terhadap Manfaat Kesihatan Molekul Hidrogen Yang Berpotensi Dan Kemudiannya Banyak Penyelidikan Terobosan Dikemukakan.
Molekul Air TERDIRI DARIPADA Dua Atom HIDROGEN DAN SATU ATOM OKSIGEN.
Walau BAGAIMANAPUN, TIDAK ADA MOLEKUL HIDROGEN BEBAS yYang Boleh Digunakan Oleh Tubuh Kerana Ia Terikat Kepada OKSIGEN.
Oleh Itu, Bekalan Air Dengan Hidrogen Tambahan Menghasilkan Faedah Yang Tidak Dapat Disampaikan Oleh Air Biasa.💧💦💧💦
Hidrogen Adalah Molekul Gas Terkecil. Oleh Kerana Ciri Istimewa ini, Hidrogen MOLEKUL Dapat MENEMBUSI Hampir SETIAP ORGAN DAN SEL-SEL BADAN (Termasuk OTAK) Di Mana Ia Mempunyai:
✅ DAYA ANTIOKSIDAN ✅ANTI-RADANG
✅MENGURANGKAN BERAT BADAN
✅ANTI -ALERGI
Hidrogen Molekul Seolah-olah Seperti TERAPEUTIK Yang Sempurna Di Dunia Yang Telah Lama Dicari – Dengan TIADA Sebarang Kesan Sampingan‼
Adakah Air Hidrogen Selamat ❓
SUDAH TENTU. ✅
Gas Hidrogen Bukanlah Bahan Asing Kepada Badan Kita. Ianya Dihasilkan Secara s6emulajadi MAKAN SAYUR Atau A BUAH Yang Kaya Serat......🥦🥬🥒🍅🥝🍓🍒🍑🍋🍎🍇
Bakteria Usus Kita Dapat Menghasilkan Banyak Liter Hidrogen Setiap Hari.
Terdapat Beratus-Ratus Atau Melebihi sSeribu Kajian Klinikal Yang Membuktikan Manfaat KESIHATAN AIR HIDROGEN.💧💧
Ia Boleh Memberi Manfaat Kepada Semua ORGAN DI DALAM BADAN. 🏃♂️🏃♀️👬👨👩👦👦👨👩👧
Hidrogen molekul Boleh MENYEBERANGI SEL DARAH - OTAK,Secara Selektif MMENEUTRALKAN RADIKAL BEBAS Yang Memusnahkan Dan Seterusnya Disingkirkan Sebagai Air Keluar Badan.💦💦
Buat Tempahan Segera, AREA KLANG VALLEY SAUDAGARKOPI HANTAR TERUS KE RUMAH ANDA.‼‼
KLIK LINK BAWAH:👇👇👇👇
#SihatBertenagaBerkhasiat
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*Dazai Osamu x Seme Male Reader
***🍋🍋🍋
POV' (M/n) :
Tampak saat diriku ini pulang dari kantor. Hari yang padat seperti biasa boss memberikan pekerjaan yang banyak dan menumpuk tanpa jeda.
Menapaki jalan tangga menuju apartemen hingga aku sampai di depan pintu lalu membuka nya.
Dan….
Taraaa... Jump scare
"Okaeri (M/n) "ucapnya dengan senyum cerah di wajahnya.
Sedangkan diriku hanya diam mematung dalam hatiku hanya bilang 'cantik'
" (M/n) aku sudah menyiapkan air hangat untuk mu mandi, "ucapnya tersenyum padaku
" Baik, "ucapku melonggarkan dasi kemeja yang ku kenakan. Berjalan menuju tangga atas dia mengikuti di belakang. Kemudian kami sampai di kamar mandi.
" Aku sudah menyiapkan air hangat, "
"Ya, Terima kasih, Dazai, "
Diriku kemudian melenggang masuk ke kamar mandi dan mulai mandi.
***(Lewati waktu 💅)
POV' Dazai :
Diriku tak sabar menantikannya pintu terbuka menampilkan (M/n) yang setengah telanjang dengan handuk yang melingkar.
Diriku memerah tak tahu harus berbuat apa.
"Kenapa kau menatap ku?, " Ucapnya dingin sambil berjalan ke arah ku.
"I I itu.. " Ucapku tak berani menatap nya aura dominannya sangat berasa. Mengeram dengan sigap ia melempar ku ke kasur kemudian menindih ku.
"Aaa.. (M-M/n)-kun," Ucapku memerah.
"Ada apa? Itu kan yang kau mau, " Ucapnya menjilati leher ku.
"Ngmnn.. Nyah"desahku menggosokan pantatku ke anggota (M/n) yang berdiri tegak
(M/n) mengeluarkan nya.
" Suck my dick..."ucapnya dengan sigap diriku langsung menjilat, mengulum dan melumat anggota (M/n).
"Mnggmmm.. " Desah ku betapa besarnya milik (M/n). Tangan kekar nya tengah sibuk mengobrak-abrik hole ku
"Aku akan cum." Ucapnya bersamaan cairan putih keluar dan dengan sigap aku menelannya.
Aku membuka rok yang ku kenakan dan langsung duduk di anggota (M/n). Memasukan nya secara serentak. Perasaan penuh di dalam bisa kurasakan. (M/n) menghentakan dengan tempo yang cepat membuatku mabuk kepayang.
"Ngh... Ahh.. Nikmat, " Ucapku mengenggam sprai. Dia terus menabrak prostat ku. Hingga merasakan anggotanya berdenyut dan membesar di dalam pertanda dia akan cum.
Langkah terakhir yang terkesan ceroboh dan saat itu pula dia mengeluarkan cairan putih kental yang membuat isi perut ku penuh.
"Hah... Hah... Hah.. Kau menang (M/n). Kau bisa menangkap ku dan menyerahkan ku ke pihak berwajib, " Ucapku pasrah.
Aku sudah tahu (M/n) akan mencari tahu identitas ku sebenarnya. Dan aku sudah tahu bahwa ia sudah menghubungi agen keamanan.
"Tcih!, merepotkan aku tak ingin bekerja dengan hal merepotkan seperti itu. Pergilah.... Kembali lah ke sana. "
"Tu tunggu kau melepasku?, bukankah. "
"Apa? Aku akan menyerahkan mu begitu. Buang waktu saja, "
"Kau memang hah.. Baiklah. Tapi aku akan mengunjungi mu atau kalau tidak aku akan menyeret mu masuk agensi ku. Agen detektif ternama, "ucapku tersenyum tulus padanya. Baru pertama kali aku merasakan rasanya jatuh cinta.
'Jadi begini ya rasanya jatuh cinta. Hangat dan menyenangkan. Rasa gelisah itu serasa menghilang' batinku
" Terserah mu. Pergilah mereka menunggumu, "
"Ya ya ya akan ku minta nanti. pertanggung jawab mu. karena membuatku tak berjalan hari ini, "ucapku menggodanya mengelus rahang atasnya kemudian dadanya hingga turun ke area selakangannya mengusap pelan anggotanya..
'Slapp.. ' menjilat bibir ku.
Bangkit dari tempat tidur ku kemudian mandi sebentar lalu berganti pakaian dan pergi dari rumah (M/n) dengan menyamar.
" Bukan akhir yang buruk (M/n). Kita akan bertemu lagi di lain waktu. See you next time, "ucapku menyeringai.
Tbc...
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Holy Orange Bottles - Cyntha Hariadi🍋
baca salah satu cerpen dari buku Mimi Lemon, dan ada cerita Mafia Time.
visualisasiku langsung ke Kwon Hoshi vs Kim Mingyu.🕶️😆
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