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#Smorgasbord Guest Posts
sallygcronin · 1 year
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Smorgasbord Posts from Your Archives -#NewSeries January 2023- 'Lucky Dip' and Do You Trust Me??
Smorgasbord Posts from Your Archives -#NewSeries January 2023- ‘Lucky Dip’ and Do You Trust Me??
Since this series began in January 2018 there have been over 1250 Posts from Your Archives where bloggers have taken the opportunity to share posts to a new audience… mine. The topics have ranged from travel, childhood, recipes, history, family and the most recent series was #PotLuck where I shared a random selection of different topics. This series is along the same lines… but is a ‘Lucky…
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Smorgasbord Posts from Your Archives -#NewSeries January 2023- 'Lucky Dip' and Do You Trust Me??
Smorgasbord Posts from Your Archives -#NewSeries January 2023- ‘Lucky Dip’ and Do You Trust Me??
Since this series began in January 2018 there have been over 1250 Posts from Your Archives where bloggers have taken the opportunity to share posts to a new audience… mine. The topics have ranged from travel, childhood, recipes, history, family and the most recent series was #PotLuck where I shared a random selection of different topics. This series is along the same lines… but is a ‘Lucky…
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istumpysk · 2 years
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Operation Stumpy Re-Read
A STORM OF SWORDS
Summary & Foreshadowing Smorgasbord (Part III)
Love is in the air.
ASOS Part III: UNDER THE CUT
JONSA 🐺❤️❄️
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ASOS Part I: CLICK
Sansa Stark, Queen in the North
Jon Snow, King in the North
Jon (Aemon?) Snow
Jon the Builder & His Gift
Ahoy Matey! Arya Stark Sails the Ocean Blue
Bran the Broken, King of Westeros
High Septon Rickon?
Pick Your Poison: The Twins Meet Their End in the Mines of Casterly Rock . . . or King's Landing
Tyrion Lannister, (Prisoner?) Hand of the King
In Remembrance: A Look Back at Sandor Clegane's & Ygritte's Greatest Moments
ASOS Part II: CLICK
Dark Daenerys Highlights & Laughs
Let's Dance: Stark vs. Targ
Showdown at the Trident
A Rat in a Maze 🐀🔪
The Usurper's Knife
Bran the Dragonslayer?
Storm x Storm 🦑🖤🐉
ASOS Part IV: CLICK
Chapter Transitions
Previous books:
AGOT Summary & Foreshadowing: CLICK
ACOK Summary & Foreshadowing: PART I & PART II
Stumpy note:
If I didn't give you credit for discovering something or if I missed any foreshadowing, please contact me and I'll rectify that.
Once again, I'd like to thank everyone that participated in the reread project. All of you have great observations and comments, I wish I could highlight them all. 🙂
JONSA 🐺❤️❄️
Once again, thank you to @ladyofasoiaf for making the manual on all things jonsa. I heavily rely on it when making these posts. :)
Chapter Transitions
Sansa I (ch. 6) -> <-Jon I (ch. 7)
Sansa visits the Queen of Thorns, while Jon has a face-to-face with the King-beyond-the-Wall. The similarities won't stop there.
Thank you, @sxpiosexualx!
Beyond the spiked moat, two dozen men were taking their practice with sword and shield. With the castle so crowded, the outer ward had been given over to guests to raise their tents and pavilions, leaving only the smaller inner yards for training. 
[...]
A fire was crackling in the hearth, and sweet-swelling rushes had been scattered on the floor. Around the long trestle table a dozen women were seated. - Sansa I, ASOS
x
Elsewhere two bearded youths in boiled leather were sparring with staffs, leaping at each other over the flames, grunting each time one landed a blow. A dozen women sat nearby in a circle, fletching arrows. - Jon I, ASOS
___
Outside its tall carved doors stood two guards in gilded halfhelms and green cloaks edged in gold satin, the golden rose of Highgarden sewn on their breasts. - Sansa I, ASOS
x
Here at least they found defenders; two guards at the flap of the tent, leaning on tall spears with round leather shields strapped to their arms. - Jon I, ASOS
___
Sansa knelt at the feet of her future queen. "You do me great honor, Your Grace."
"Won't you call me Margaery? Please, rise. Loras, help the Lady Sansa to her feet. Might I call you Sansa?" - Sansa I, ASOS
x
"Your Grace?" The king smiled. "That's not a style one often hears from the lips of free folk. I'm Mance to most, The Mance to some. Will you take a horn of mead?" - Jon I, ASOS
___
Pale, elegant Lady Graceford was with child, and Lady Bulwer was a child, no more than eight.
[...]
The old woman called to Butterbumps. "Fool! Give us a song. A long one, I should think. 'The Bear and the Maiden Fair' will do nicely." - Sansa I, ASOS
x
A dark young man and a pretty blonde woman were sharing a horn of mead. A pregnant woman stood over a brazier cooking a brace of hens, while a grey-haired man in a tattered cloak of black and red sat crosslegged on a pillow, playing a lute and singing - Jon I, ASOS
___
"Sansa," Lady Alerie broke in, "you must be very hungry. Shall we have a bite of boar together, and some lemon cakes?" - Sansa I, ASOS
x
"Sit, if you like," Rayder said when they were gone. "Are you hungry? Tormund left us two birds at least." - Jon I, ASOS
___
"He will," Sansa lied. "He is very . . . very comely." - Sansa I, ASOS
x
Jon had his lie all ready. "The Lord Commander sent me to the Halfhand for seasoning, so he took me on his ranging." - Jon I, ASOS
___
Sansa realized that her mouth was open again. She filled it with a spoon of broth - Sansa I, ASOS
x
He took a long draught of mead to buy time for his answer. - Jon I, ASOS
___
Courtesy is a lady's armor. You must not offend them, be careful what you say. - Sansa I, ASOS
x
Guest right or no, Jon Snow knew he walked on rotten ice here. One false step and he might plunge through, into water cold enough to stop his heart. Weigh every word before you speak it, he told himself. - Jon I, ASOS
+.+.+
Sansa I (ch. 6) -> Jon I (ch. 7)
Sounds like fun!
The Baratheons have always had some queer notions, to be sure. It comes from their Targaryen blood, I should think." She sniffed. "They tried to marry me to a Targaryen once, but I soon put an end to that." - Sansa I, ASOS
+.+.+
Jon II (ch. 15) -> <- Sansa II (ch. 16)
Children, shared beds, men flying eagles, and brand new clothing in back-to-back chapters.
Thank you, @sxpiosexualx!
"I might get her with child."
"Aye, I'd hope so. A strong son or a lively laughing girl kissed by fire, and where's the harm in that?" - Jon II, ASOS
x
If I give him sons, he may come to love me. She would name them Eddard and Brandon and Rickon, and raise them all to be as valiant as Ser Loras. And to hate Lannisters, too. In Sansa's dreams, her children looked just like the brothers she had lost. Sometimes there was even a girl who looked like Arya. - Sansa II, ASOS
___
Rangers often shared skins for warmth, but warmth was not all Ygritte wanted, he suspected. After that he had taken to using Ghost to keep her away. Old Nan used to tell stories about knights and their ladies who would sleep in a single bed with a blade between them for honor's sake, but he thought this must be the first time where a direwolf took the place of the sword. - Jon II, ASOS
x
They spent long afternoons doing needlework and talking over lemon cakes and honeyed wine, played at tiles of an evening, sang together in the castle sept . . . and often one or two of them would be chosen to share Margaery's bed, where they would whisper half the night away. - Sansa II, ASOS
___
"Jon Snow, you know nothing. You don't go in with clothes." - Jon II, ASOS
x
They are children, Sansa thought. They are silly little girls, even Elinor. They've never seen a battle, they've never seen a man die, they know nothing. - Sansa II, ASOS
___
She reminded him a little of his sister Arya, though Arya was younger and probably skinnier. It was hard to tell how plump or thin Ygritte might be, with all the furs and skins she wore. - Jon II, ASOS
x
Sister. Sansa had once dreamt of having a sister like Margaery; beautiful and gentle, with all the world's graces at her command. Arya had been entirely unsatisfactory as sisters went. - Sansa II, ASOS
___
Jon turned at the sudden sound of wings. Blue-grey feathers filled his eyes, as sharp talons buried themselves in his face. Red pain lanced through him sudden and fierce as pinions beat round his head. He saw the beak, but there was no time to get a hand up or reach for a weapon. - Jon II, ASOS
x
"Willas has the best birds in the Seven Kingdoms," Margaery said when the two of them were briefly alone. "He flies an eagle sometimes. You will see, Sansa." She took her by the hand and gave it a squeeze. "Sister." - Sansa II, ASOS
___
Jon wheeled and followed Tormund back toward the head of the column, his new cloak hanging heavy from his shoulders. It was made of unwashed sheepskins, worn fleece side in, as the wildlings suggested. It kept the snow off well enough, and at night it was good and warm, but he kept his black cloak as well, folded up beneath his saddle. 
[...]
Mance Rayder had not been blind to Rattleshirt's mistrust of the "crow-come-over," so after he had given Jon his new sheepskin cloak he had suggested that he might want to ride with Tormund Giantsbane instead. - Jon II, ASOS
x
"A new gown?" she said, as wary as she was astonished.
[...]
"More lovely than any you have worn, my lady," the old woman promised. She measured Sansa's hips with a length of knotted string. "All silk and Myrish lace, with satin linings. You will be very beautiful. The queen herself has commanded it." - Sansa II, ASOS
x
And so it was that her lord husband cloaked her in the colors of House Lannister whilst standing on the back of a fool. - Sansa III, ASOS
+.+.+
Sansa VI (ch. 68) -> Jon IX (ch. 69)
Oh boy!
When it was time for the bedding, her knights carried her up to the tower, stripping her as they went and shouting bawdy jests. Tyrion spared me that, Sansa remembered. It would not have been so bad being undressed for a man she loved, by friends who loved them both. - Sansa VI, ASOS
___
You'll know that, when you have a child."
"A child?" said Sansa, uncertainly.
Lysa waved a hand negligently. "Not for many years. You are too young to be a mother. One day you shall want children, though. Just as you will want to marry." - Sansa VI, ASOS
___
How would you like to marry your cousin, the Lord Robert? - Sansa VI, ASOS
___
It is not me she wants her son to marry, it is my claim. No one will ever marry me for love. - Sansa VI, ASOS
___
I see no reason why you should not be wed as soon as we know that your Lannister husband is dead. A secret wedding, to be sure. - Sansa VI, ASOS
x
His account introduces a young maiden, or "wolf girl" as he dubs her, with the name of Sara Snow. So smitten was Prince Jacaerys with this creature, a bastard daughter of the late Lord Rickon Stark, that he lay with her of a night. On learning that his guest had claimed the maidenhead of his bastard sister, Lord Cregan became most wroth, and only softened when Sara Snow told him that the prince had taken her for his wife. They had spoken their vows in Winterfell’s own godswood before a heart tree, and only then had she given herself to him, wrapped in furs amidst the snows as the old gods looked on. - Fire & Blood
+.+.+
Sansa VI (ch. 68) -> <- Jon IX (ch. 69)
Wind through their hair.
Thank you, @butterflies-dragons!
The wind ran salty fingers through her hair, and Sansa shivered. - Sansa VI, ASOS
x
A gust of wind sent icy tendrils wending through his long brown hair. - Jon IX, ASOS
+.+.+
Jon XII (ch. 79) -> <- Sansa VII (ch. 80)
Love and Winterfell. ❤️
Thank you, @esther-dot!
You can't be the Lord of Winterfell, you're bastard-born, he heard Robb say again. And the stone kings were growling at him with granite tongues. You do not belong here. This is not your place. - Jon XII, ASOS
x
"I don't want her here." Her aunt's eyes were shiny with tears. "Why did you bring her to the Vale, Petyr? This isn't her place. She doesn't belong here." - Sansa VII, ASOS
___
Every morning they had trained together, since they were big enough to walk; Snow and Stark, spinning and slashing about the wards of Winterfell, shouting and laughing, sometimes crying when there was no one else to see. They were not little boys when they fought, but knights and mighty heroes. - Jon XII, ASOS
x
She remembered a summer's snow in Winterfell when Arya and Bran had ambushed her as she emerged from the keep one morning. They'd each had a dozen snowballs to hand, and she'd had none. Bran had been perched on the roof of the covered bridge, out of reach, but Sansa had chased Arya through the stables and around the kitchen until both of them were breathless. She might even have caught her, but she'd slipped on some ice. Her sister came back to see if she was hurt. When she said she wasn't, Arya hit her in the face with another snowball, but Sansa grabbed her leg and pulled her down and was rubbing snow in her hair when Jory came along and pulled them apart, laughing. - Sansa VII, ASOS
___
When Jon closed his eyes he saw the heart tree, with its pale limbs, red leaves, and solemn face. The weirwood was the heart of Winterfell, Lord Eddard always said . . . but to save the castle Jon would have to tear that heart up by its ancient roots, and feed it to the red woman's hungry fire god. I have no right, he thought. Winterfell belongs to the old gods. - Jon XII, ASOS
x
But who could she pray to? The garden had been meant for a godswood once, she knew, but the soil was too thin and stony for a weirwood to take root. A godswood without gods, as empty as me. - Sansa VII, ASOS
___
He wanted it, Jon knew then. He wanted it as much as he had ever wanted anything. I have always wanted it, he thought, guiltily. May the gods forgive me. It was a hunger inside him, sharp as a dragonglass blade. A hunger . . . he could feel it. - Jon XII, ASOS
x
Dawn, she thought. Another day. Another new day. It was the old days she hungered for. Prayed for. - Sansa VII, ASOS
___
Winterfell, he thought. Theon left it burned and broken, but I could restore it. Surely his father would have wanted that, and Robb as well. They would never have wanted the castle left in ruins. - Jon XII, ASOS
x
The snow fell and the castle rose. Two walls ankle-high, the inner taller than the outer. Towers and turrets, keeps and stairs, a round kitchen, a square armory, the stables along the inside of the west wall. It was only a castle when she began, but before very long Sansa knew it was Winterfell. - Sansa VII, ASOS
___
The warmth took some of the ache from his muscles and made him think of Winterfell's muddy pools, steaming and bubbling in the godswood. Winterfell, he thought. - Jon XII, ASOS
x
"No. It was always warm, even when it snowed. Water from the hot springs is piped through the walls to warm them, and inside the glass gardens it was always like the hottest day of summer." - Sansa VII, ASOS
___
Would I sooner be hanged for a turncloak by Lord Janos, or forswear my vows, marry Val, and become the Lord of Winterfell? It seemed an easy choice when he thought of it in those terms . . . though if Ygritte had still been alive, it might have been even easier. - Jon XII, ASOS
x
Sansa felt sorry for her little cousin sometimes, but she could not imagine ever wanting to be his wife. I would sooner be married to Tyrion again. - Sansa VII, ASOS
___
Only this time, this time, Robb had answered, "You can't be Lord of Winterfell, you're bastard-born. My lady mother says you can't ever be the Lord of Winterfell." - Jon XII, ASOS
x
"A giant," the boy whispered, weeping. "It wasn't me, it was a giant hurt the castle. She killed him! I hate her! She's a bastard and I hate her! I don't want to be leeched!" - Sansa VII, ASOS
___
In the end Halder and Horse had to pull him away from Iron Emmett, one man on either arm. The ranger sat on the ground dazed, his shield half in splinters, the visor of his helm knocked askew, and his sword six yards away. "Jon, enough," Halder was shouting, "he's down, you disarmed him. Enough!"
No. Not enough. Never enough. Jon let his sword drop. "I'm sorry," he muttered. "Emmett, are you hurt?" - Jon XII, ASOS
x
It was more than Sansa could stand. "Robert, stop that." Instead he swung the doll again, and a foot of wall exploded. She grabbed for his hand but she caught the doll instead. There was a loud ripping sound as the thin cloth tore. Suddenly she had the doll's head, Robert had the legs and body, and the rag-and-sawdust stuffing was spilling in the snow.
[...]
"It was my fault." Sansa showed them the doll's head. "I ripped his doll in two. I never meant to, but . . ."
[...]
A mad rage seized hold of her. She picked up a broken branch and smashed the torn doll's head down on top of it, then pushed it down atop the shattered gatehouse of her snow castle. - Sansa VII, ASOS
___
Ygritte wanted me to be a wildling. Stannis wants me to be the Lord of Winterfell. But what do I want?
[...]
Red eyes, Jon realized, but not like Melisandre's. He had a weirwood's eyes. Red eyes, red mouth, white fur. Blood and bone, like a heart tree. He belongs to the old gods, this one. And he alone of all the direwolves was white. Six pups they'd found in the late summer snows, him and Robb; five that were grey and black and brown, for the five Starks, and one white, as white as Snow.
He had his answer then. - Jon VII, ASOS
x
I will tell my aunt that I don't want to marry Robert. Not even the High Septon himself could declare a woman married if she refused to say the vows.
[...]
I will tell her. I will! - Sansa VII, ASOS
+.+.+
Jon XII (ch. 79) <- Sansa VII (ch. 80)
Ghostly silent, drifting snowflake. 🐺❄️
When she opened the door to the garden, it was so lovely that she held her breath, unwilling to disturb such perfect beauty. The snow drifted down and down, all in ghostly silence, and lay thick and unbroken on the ground. All color had fled the world outside. It was a place of whites and blacks and greys. White towers and white snow and white statues, black shadows and black trees, the dark grey sky above. A pure world, Sansa thought. I do not belong here.
Yet she stepped out all the same. Her boots tore ankle-deep holes into the smooth white surface of the snow, yet made no sound. Sansa drifted past frosted shrubs and thin dark trees, and wondered if she were still dreaming. Drifting snowflakes brushed her face as light as lover's kisses, and melted on her cheeks. At the center of the garden, beside the statue of the weeping woman that lay broken and half-buried on the ground, she turned her face up to the sky and closed her eyes. She could feel the snow on her lashes, taste it on her lips. It was the taste of Winterfell. The taste of innocence. The taste of dreams.
When Sansa opened her eyes again, she was on her knees. She did not remember falling. It seemed to her that the sky was a lighter shade of grey. Dawn, she thought. Another day. Another new day. It was the old days she hungered for. Prayed for. But who could she pray to? The garden had been meant for a godswood once, she knew, but the soil was too thin and stony for a weirwood to take root. A godswood without gods, as empty as me. - Sansa VII, ASOS
+.+.+
Sansa and Chett appear to have two things in common: drifting snowflakes, and Jon Snow.
AGOT:
Prologue: ice threat introduction.
Final chapter: fire threat introduction.
ACOK:
Prologue: cold-hearted King Stannis with his dying maester.
Final chapter: kindhearted King Bran with his dying maester.
ASOS:
Snow was falling. - Prologue, ASOS
vs.
Snow was falling on the Eyrie. - Sansa VII, ASOS
___
What was wrong with him? He could hardly breathe. Had he gone to sleep? - Prologue, ASOS
vs.
Outside the flakes drifted down as soft and silent as memory. Was this what woke me? 
[...]
it was so lovely that she held her breath - Sansa VII, ASOS
___
It was a heavy fall, thick white flakes coming down all about him. 
[...]
The snow was drifting in to cover him. - Prologue, ASOS
vs.
The snow drifted down and down, all in ghostly silence, and lay thick and unbroken on the ground. - Sansa VII, ASOS
___
He got to his knees, and something wet and cold touched his nose. Chett looked up. - Prologue, ASOS
vs.
When Sansa opened her eyes again, she was on her knees. She did not remember falling. - Sansa VII, ASOS
___
He could feel tears freezing to his cheeks.
[...]
He felt as though he were being attacked by a cloud of pale cold bugs. They settled on his shoulders, on his head, they flew at his nose and his eyes. Cursing, he brushed them off. - Prologue, ASOS
vs.
Drifting snowflakes brushed her face as light as lover's kisses, and melted on her cheeks.
[...]
She could feel the snow on her lashes, taste it on her lips. - Sansa VII, ASOS
___
It isn't fair, he wanted to scream. Snow would ruin everything he'd worked for, all his careful plans. 
[...]
There'd be no lord's life for the leechman's son, no keep to call his own, no wives nor crowns. 
[...]
The snow's taken it all from me . . . the bloody snow . . .
Snow had ruined him once before. Snow and his pet pig. - Prologue, ASOS
vs.
It was the taste of Winterfell. The taste of innocence. The taste of dreams.
[...]
Dawn, she thought. Another day. Another new day. It was the old days she hungered for. Prayed for. - Sansa VII, ASOS
+.+.+
A Snow Maid with her Snow Knight.
What do I want with snowballs? She looked at her sad little arsenal. There's no one to throw them at. She let the one she was making drop from her hand. I could build a snow knight instead, she thought. - Sansa VII, ASOS
x
"What are you doing?"
Petyr straightened his cloak. "Kissing a snow maid." - Sansa VII, ASOS
+.+.+
Garlan Tyrell or Jon Snow?
Thank you, @rose-of-red-lake!
"It is, my lady," said Ser Loras. "Garlan often trains against three men, or even four. In battle it is seldom one against one, he says, so he likes to be prepared."
"He must be very brave." - Sansa I, ASOS
x
"Lord Commander. How may we serve you?"
"With your three best."
Emmett grinned. "Arron. Emrick. Jace."
[...]
"Which one do you want first?" asked Arron.
"All three of you. At once." - Jon VI, ASOS
___
"He is a great knight," Ser Loras replied. "A better sword than me, in truth, though I'm the better lance." - Sansa I, ASOS
x
Jon swelled with pride. "Robb is a stronger lance than I am, but I'm the better sword, and Hullen says I sit a horse as well as anyone in the castle." - Jon I, ASOS
+.+.+
Sansa daydreams of dancing.
Joffrey and Margaery led in their place. How can a monster dance so beautifully? Sansa wondered. She had often daydreamed of how she would dance at her wedding, with every eye upon her and her handsome lord. In her dreams they had all been smiling. - Sansa III, ASOS
x
When the musicians began to play, she timidly laid her hand on Tyrion's and said, "My lord, should we lead the dance?"
His mouth twisted. "I think we have already given them sufficent amusement for one day, don't you?"
"As you say, my lord." She pulled her hand back. - Sansa III, ASOS
x
"Lady Sansa." Ser Garlan Tyrell stood beside the dais. "Would you honor me? If your lord consents?" - Sansa III, ASOS
x
A snowflake danced upon the air. Then another. Dance with me, Jon Snow, he thought. You'll dance with me anon. - Jon XII, ADWD
+.+.+
The Winter Rose.
Sansa is not his rose.
"At the Hand's tourney, don't you remember? You rode a white courser, and your armor was a hundred different kinds of flowers. You gave me a rose. A red rose. You threw white roses to the other girls that day." It made her flush to speak of it. "You said no victory was half as beautiful as me."
Ser Loras gave her a modest smile. "I spoke only a simple truth, that any man with eyes could see."
He doesn't remember, Sansa realized, startled. He is only being kind to me, he doesn't remember me or the rose or any of it. She had been so certain that it meant something, that it meant everything. A red rose, not a white. - Sansa I, ASOS
___
Ygritte is not his rose.
Jon sat up. "Ygritte, I never stole you."
"Aye, you did. You jumped down the mountain and killed Orell, and afore I could get my axe you had a knife at my throat. I thought you'd have me then, or kill me, or maybe both, but you never did. And when I told you the tale o' Bael the Bard and how he plucked the rose o' Winterfell, I thought you'd know to pluck me then for certain, but you didn't. You know nothing, Jon Snow." - Jon III, ASOS
___
Ygritte doesn't like flowers.
"Men can build a lot higher than this. In Oldtown there's a tower taller than the Wall." He could tell she did not believe him. If I could show her Winterfell . . . give her a flower from the glass gardens, feast her in the Great Hall, and show her the stone kings on their thrones. We could bathe in the hot pools, and love beneath the heart tree while the old gods watched over us.
[...]
"Then I'd push him in a stream or throw a bucket o' water on him. Anyhow, men shouldn't smell sweet like flowers."
"What's wrong with flowers?"
"Nothing, for a bee. For bed I want one o' these." Ygritte made to grab the front of his breeches. - Jon V, ASOS
___
But Sansa does.
"Sweet lady," he said, "no victory is half so beautiful as you." Sansa took the flower timidly, struck dumb by his gallantry. - Sansa II, AGOT
___
Sweet-smelling Sansa.
Thank you, @decadelongsummer!
Sansa Stark, he mused. Soft-spoken sweet-smelling Sansa, who loved silks, songs, chivalry and tall gallant knights with handsome faces. - Tyrion III, ASOS
x
And then there are the roses. Roses smell so sweet, don't they? Especially when there are so many of them. - Tyrion V, ASOS
___
The Roadside Rose.
"Do you require guarding?" Marillion said lightly. "I am composing a new song, you should know. A song so sweet and sad it will melt even your frozen heart. 'The Roadside Rose,' I mean to call it. About a baseborn girl so beautiful she bewitched every man who laid eyes upon her." - Sansa VII, ASOS
___
The rose and the direwolf.
"I will not have the rose and the direwolf in bed together," declared Lord Tywin. - Tyrion III, ASOS
___
Tywin steals a rose before it blooms. Better a Lannister than a Tyrell, eh?
The Conclave met in Oldtown behind closed doors, Tyrion knew; its deliberations were supposedly a secret. So Varys has little birds in the Citadel too. "I see. So my father decided to nip the rose before it bloomed." He had to chuckle. "Pycelle is a toad. But better a Lannister toad than a Tyrell toad, no?" - Tyrion II, ASOS
___
ACOK: Jon IV (ch. 51) -> <- Sansa IV (ch. 52)
The winter roses had only then come into bloom.
'All I ask is a flower,' Bael answered, 'the fairest flower that blooms in the gardens o' Winterfell.'"
"Now as it happened the winter roses had only then come into bloom, and no flower is so rare nor precious. So the Stark sent to his glass gardens and commanded that the most beautiful o’ the winter roses be plucked for the singer’s payment. And so it was done. But when morning come, the singer had vanished … and so had Lord Brandon’s maiden daughter. - Jon IV, ACOK
x
"The blood is the seal of your womanhood. Lady Catelyn might have prepared you. You've had your first flowering, no more."
Sansa had never felt less flowery.  - Sansa IV, ACOK
___
Plucked.
"But not deflowered, one can hope." Young Lord Hunter's bushy mustache hid his mouth entirely.
"Yet," said Lyn Corbray, as if she were not there. "But ripe for plucking soon, I'd say." - Alayne I, AFFC
___
Sansa and Jon don't forget the glass gardens.
"No. It was always warm, even when it snowed. Water from the hot springs is piped through the walls to warm them, and inside the glass gardens it was always like the hottest day of summer." She stood, towering over the great white castle. "I can't think how to do the glass roof over the gardens." - Sansa VII, ASOS
x
Glass, Jon mused, might be of use here. Castle Black needs its own glass gardens, like the ones at Winterfell. - Jon VII, ADWD
+.+.+
Tyrion Lannister is a jealous man.
After all his planning, after the sortie and the bridge of ships, after getting his face slashed in two, Tyrion had been eclipsed by a dead man. - Tyrion I, ASOS
x
Tyrion had seen her only yesterday, climbing the serpentine steps with a pail of water. He had watched as a young knight had offered to carry the heavy pail. The way she had touched his arm and smiled for him had tied Tyrion's guts into knots. 
[...]
It doesn't matter, he told himself as he waited for moonrise. Whatever you wear, you're still a dwarf. You'll never be as tall as that knight on the steps, him with his long straight legs and hard stomach and wide manly shoulders. - Tyrion II, ASOS
x
"Chataya's?" Tyrion said, annoyed.
"It's good to be a knight. No more looking for the cheaper brothels down the street." Bronn grinned. "Now it's Alayaya and Marei in the same featherbed, with Ser Bronn in the middle."
Tyrion had to bite back his annoyance. Bronn had as much right to bed Alayaya as any other man, but still . . . I never touched her, much as I wanted to, but Bronn could not know that. He should have kept his cock out of her. - Tyrion II, ASOS
x
"Young lady," Shae repeated, savoring the words. "You're half right, m'lord. I'm young."
Eighteen, Tyrion thought. Eighteen, and a whore, but quick of wit, nimble as a cat between the sheets, with large dark eyes and fine black hair and a sweet, soft, hungry little mouth . . . and mine! Damn you, eunuch.
"M'lord Varys complimented Chella on her ears and said she must have killed many men to have such a fine necklace," Shae explained. It grated on him to hear her call Varys m'lord in that tone; that was what she called him in their pillow play. - Tyrion I, ACOK
x
He's getting taller, Tyrion realized as Pod stood in his stirrups for a better look. He'll soon tower over me like all the rest. - Tyrion V, ASOS
x
She fiddled nervously with her hair and looked down the table to where Joffrey sat with his Tyrell queen.
Does she wish it were her in Margaery's place? Tyrion frowned. Even a child should have better sense. He turned away, wanting distraction, but everywhere he looked were women, fair fine beautiful happy women who belonged to other men. 
[...]
And there was one woman, sitting almost at the foot of the third table on the left . . . the wife of one of the Fossoways, he thought, and heavy with his child. Her delicate beauty was in no way diminished by her belly, nor was her pleasure in the food and frolics. Tyrion watched as her husband fed her morsels off his plate. They drank from the same cup, and would kiss often and unpredictably. Whenever they did, his hand would gently rest upon her stomach, a tender and protective gesture.
He wondered what Sansa would do if he leaned over and kissed her right now. Flinch away, most likely. Or be brave and suffer through it, as was her duty. She is nothing if not dutiful, this wife of mine. If he told her that he wished to have her maidenhead tonight, she would suffer that dutifully as well, and weep no more than she had to. - Tyrion VIII, ASOS
+.+.+
A man with a few parallels with Petyr Baelish sings a song.
The Dornishman's wife was as fair as the sun, and her kisses were warmer than spring. But the Dornishman's blade was made of black steel, and its kiss was a terrible thing.
The Dornishman's wife would sing as she bathed, in a voice that was sweet as a peach, But the Dornishman's blade had a song of its own, and a bite sharp and cold as a leech.
As he lay on the ground with the darkness around, and the taste of his blood on his tongue, His brothers knelt by him and prayed him a prayer, and he smiled and he laughed and he sung,
"Brothers, oh brothers, my days here are done, the Dornishman's taken my life, But what does it matter, for all men must die, and I've tasted the Dornishman's wife!" - Jon I, ASOS
x
Abel rubbed the sleep from his eyes, took up his lute, and launched into "The Dornishman's Wife," whilst one of his washerwomen beat time on her drum. The singer changed the words, though. Instead of tasting a Dornishman's wife, he sang of tasting a northman's daughter. - The Turncloak, ADWD
x
When they break, they break hard, Jon Snow thought as he watched them reel away. The drums had all gone silent. How do you like that music, Mance? How do you like the taste of the Dornishman's wife? - Jon VIII, ASOS
+.+.+
But another Bael did.
"Would that I were. I will not deny that Bael's exploit inspired mine own . . . but I did not steal either of your sisters that I recall. Bael wrote his own songs, and lived them. I only sing the songs that better men have made. More mead?" - Jon I, ASOS
+.+.+
A direwolf doesn't like Petyr.
Thank you, @decadelongsummer!
Instead the direwolf leapt forward, snarling.
Ser Ryman's palfrey shied off with a whinny of fear, and Petyr Pimple's reared and threw him. - Catelyn VI, ASOS
+.+.+
Petyr Baelish sounding a lot like Jon Snow at a Winterfell feast.
Thank you, @kadarakey!
Petyr tried to kiss your mother, only she pushed him away. She laughed at him. He looked so wounded I thought my heart would burst, and afterward he drank until he passed out at the table. Uncle Brynden carried him up to bed before my father could find him like that. - Sansa VII, ASOS
+.+.+
The Sun.
Thank you, @agentrouka-blog and @that-plo-koon!
Sansa … Sansa is your sister. You may be as different as the sun and the moon, but the same blood flows through both your hearts. - Arya II, AGOT
x
The arms of Tarth were quartered rose and azure, and bore a yellow sun and crescent moon. - Brienne II, AFFC
x
When he thought of his daughters, he would have wept gladly, but the tears would not come. Even now, he was a Stark of Winterfell, and his grief and his rage froze hard inside him.
When he kept very still, his leg did not hurt so much, so he did his best to lie unmoving. For how long he could not say. There was no sun and no moon. - Eddard XV, AGOT
x
The wine was very fine; an Arbor vintage, she thought. It tasted of oak and fruit and hot summer nights, the flavors blossoming in her mouth like flowers opening to the sun. - Sansa VI, ASOS
x
Petyr studied her eyes, as if seeing them for the first time. "You have your mother's eyes. Honest eyes, and innocent. Blue as a sunlit sea. When you are a little older, many a man will drown in those eyes." - Sansa I, AFFC
x
"You cannot come with me," Jon said, cupping the wolf's head in his hands and looking deep into those eyes. "You have to go to Castle Black. Do you understand? Castle Black. Can you find it? The way home? Just follow the ice, east and east, into the sun, and you'll find it. - Jon III, ASOS
x
Ygritte wanted me to be a wildling. Stannis wants me to be the Lord of Winterfell. But what do I want? The sun crept down the sky to dip behind the Wall where it curved through the western hills. - Jon XII, ASOS
x
"Snow," the moon insisted.
The white wolf ran from it, racing toward the cave of night where the sun had hidden, his breath frosting in the air. - Jon I, ADWD
+.+.+
Jon and Tyrion use shoddy substitutes for the sun. Who's the sun?
"Not necessary, but some find it pleasant. What of love?"
"When the sun has set, no candle can replace it."
"Is that from a song?" Tyrion cocked his head, smiling. - Tyrion II, ASOS
x
His dusky woman was enough to satisfy his appetites until he could reach Meereen and claim his queen. No man had need of candles when the sun awaited him. - Victarion I, ADWD
___
Bronn laughed, and Tyrion had to smile. "Into the tent, Shae, if you would be so kind." He lifted the flap and held it for her. Inside, he knelt to light a candle. - Tyrion VIII, ASOS
x
A single candle lit the gloom, spicing the air with the scent of jasmine.
[...]
"Shae," he groaned, "it is not safe."
For a time she said nothing at all. Tyrion tried to speak of other things, but he met a wall of sullen courtesy as icy and unyielding as the Wall he'd once walked in the north. Gods be good, he thought wearily as he watched the candle burn down and begin to gutter, how could I let this happen again, after Tysha? Am I as great a fool as my father thinks?
[...]
When the candle burned out, Tyrion disentangled himself and lit another. - Tyrion II, ASOS
x
All the sweet innocence of the world was in her voice. Innocence? Fool, she's a whore, all she knows of men is the bit between their legs. Fool, fool. "Better you than me." Tyrion sat. "We have a long day before us, both of us. You shouldn't have blown out that taper. How are we to find our clothing?" - Tyrion VII
___
Ygritte had brought a torch, but there was no other light. She stood beside a little waterfall that fell from a cleft in the rock down into a wide dark pool. The orange and yellow flames shone against the pale green water.
[…]
Smiling, she set the torch carefully in a notch of rock, and came toward him. "There's naught to eat in the dark but flesh," she whispered, biting at his neck.
[…]
The light was shifting all about her, Jon noticed suddenly. He looked around. "We had best go up. The torch is almost done."
[…]
"What?" he prompted, as the torch began to gutter.
[…]
By the time the torch burned out, Jon Snow no longer cared. – Jon III, ASOS
+.+.+
Ygritte or Sansa Stark?
Sounds familiar.
At a lord's court the girl would never have been considered anything but common, he knew. She had a round peasant face, a pug nose, and slightly crooked teeth, and her eyes were too far apart. Jon had noticed all that the first time he'd seen her, when his dirk had been at her throat. Lately, though, he was noticing some other things. When she grinned, the crooked teeth didn't seem to matter. And maybe her eyes were too far apart, but they were a pretty blue-grey color, and lively as any eyes he knew. Sometimes she sang in a low husky voice that stirred him. And sometimes by the cookfire when she sat hugging her knees with the flames waking echoes in her red hair, and looked at him, just smiling . . . well, that stirred some things as well. - Jon II, ASOS
___
Tears would fill her eyes.
Oooooooh, I am the LAST of the giants, so learn well the words of my song. For when I am gone the singing will fade, and the silence shall last long and long.
There were tears on Ygritte's cheeks when the song ended. – Jon II, ASOS
x
Sansa would call this an enchantment, and tears would fill her eyes at the wonder of it, but Arya would run out laughing and shouting, wanting to touch it all. -Jon III, ASOS
x
Sansa would have sighed and shed a tear for true love, but Arya just thought it was stupid. - Arya VIII, ASOS
___
Those easy Tully smiles.
She bit his neck and he nuzzled hers, burying his nose in her thick red hair. Lucky, he thought, she is lucky, fire-kissed. - Jon III, ASOS
x
Ygritte had been pretty in her own way, with her red hair kissed by fire, but it was her smile that made her face come alive. - Jon III, ADWD
x
Robb and Sansa and Bran and even little Rickon all took after the Tullys, with easy smiles and fire in their hair. - Arya I, AGOT
___
Half fish, you say?
Ygritte punched his arm. "You know nothing, Jon Snow. I'm half a fish, I'll have you know." - Jon V, ASOS
___
Jon imagines a girl that does not exist . . . or does she?
He could tell she did not believe him. If I could show her Winterfell . . . give her a flower from the glass gardens, feast her in the Great Hall, and show her the stone kings on their thrones. We could bathe in the hot pools, and love beneath the heart tree while the old gods watched over us. - Jon V, ASOS
x
"Who is Ygritte?" Donal Noye asked pointedly.
"A woman of the free folk." How could he explain Ygritte to them? She's warm and smart and funny and she can kiss a man or slit his throat. - Jon VI, ASOS
x
When his eyelids fluttered open, he was wrapped in thick wool and floating. He could not seem to move, but that did not matter. For a time he dreamed that Ygritte was with him, tending him with gentle hands. Finally he closed his eyes and slept. - Jon VI, ASOS
+.+.+
Ygritte and Jon have a conversation about Sansa Stark.
"And what if they do? I'd sooner be stolen by a strong man than be given t' some weakling by my father."
"You say that, but how can you know? What if you were stolen by someone you hated?"
"He'd have t' be quick and cunning and brave t' steal me. So his sons would be strong and smart as well. Why would I hate such a man as that?"
"Maybe he never washes, so he smells as rank as a bear."
"Then I'd push him in a stream or throw a bucket o' water on him. Anyhow, men shouldn't smell sweet like flowers."
[...]
Jon caught her wrist. "What if the man who stole you drank too much?" he insisted. "What if he was brutal or cruel?" He tightened his grip to make a point. "What if he was stronger than you, and liked to beat you bloody?" - Jon V, ASOS
+.+.+
Jon lays with his kin, avoids answering a question, and contemplates whether Arya was ever truly his sister.
"She [Ygritte] even claimed we were kin. She told me a story . . ." - Jon VII, ACOK
x
She punched him. "That's vile. Would you bed your sister?"
"Longspear's not your brother." - Jon III, ASOS
x
Jon had never met anyone so stubborn, except maybe for his little sister Arya. Is she still my sister? he wondered. Was she ever? - Jon III, ASOS
+.+.+
Wedding bells for Sansa and her cousin.
How would you like to marry your cousin, the Lord Robert?" - Sansa VI, ASOS
+.+.+
A moody bastard, pretending to be Arya's brother, almost sleeps with his sister.
"Why did you say that?" Arya hopped to her feet. "You're not my brother."
"That's right," he said angrily. "I'm too bloody lowborn to be kin to m'lady high."
Arya was taken aback by the fury in his voice. "That's not the way I meant it."
"Yes it is." He sat down on the bench, cradling a cup of wine between his hands. "Go away. I want to drink this wine in peace. Then maybe I'll go find that black-haired girl and ring her bell for her." - Arya V, ASOS
+.+.+
Targaryens lusting for their sisters.
Lord Mace Tyrell and his entourage had been housed behind the royal sept, in the long slate-roofed keep that had been called the Maidenvault since King Baelor the Blessed had confined his sisters therein, so the sight of them might not tempt him into carnal thoughts. - Sansa I, ASOS
x
The Dragonknight once won a tourney as the Knight of Tears, so he could name his sister the queen of love and beauty in place of the king's mistress. - Bran II, ASOS
x
Why shouldn't I marry Cersei openly and share her bed every night? The dragons always married their sisters. - Jaime III, ASOS
x
"I am sick of being careful. The Targaryens wed brother to sister, why shouldn't we do the same? Marry me, Cersei. Stand up before the realm and say it's me you want. We'll have our own wedding feast, and make another son in place of Joffrey." - Jaime VII ASOS
x
She pulled her hands away. "You are talking madness again. Would you have us ripped apart, as Mother did that time she caught us playing? Tommen would lose the throne, Myrcella her marriage . . . I want to be your wife, we belong to each other, but it can never be, Jaime. We are brother and sister."
"The Targaryens . . ."
"We are not Targaryens!" - Jaime IX, ASOS
+.+.+
Mance or Jon? Mance deserts for a cloak.
"You will have heard stories of my desertion, I have no doubt."
"Some say it was for a crown. Some say for a woman. Others that you had the wildling blood."
[...]
"It was for this."
"A cloak?" - Jon I, ASOS
x
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+.+.+
Fertility and Children
The Tyrells have their sights set on Sansa.
"The Tyrells can trace their descent back to Garth Greenhand," was the best she could manage at short notice.
The Queen of Thorns snorted. "So can the Florents, the Rowans, the Oakhearts, and half the other noble houses of the south. Garth liked to plant his seed in fertile ground, they say. I shouldn't wonder that more than his hands were green." - Sansa I, ASOS
___
Three girls, with three different eggs.
An immense round fat man, as big as three Moon Boys, he came cartwheeling into the hall, vaulted onto the table, and laid a gigantic egg right in front of Sansa. "Break it, my lady," he commanded. When she did, a dozen yellow chicks escaped and began running in all directions. "Catch them!" Butterbumps exclaimed. - Sansa I, ASOS
x
"He told me the moon was an egg, Khaleesi," the Lysene girl said. "Once there were two moons in the sky, but one wandered too close to the sun and cracked from the heat. A thousand thousand dragons poured forth, and drank the fire of the sun. That is why dragons breathe flame. One day the other moon will kiss the sun too, and then it will crack and the dragons will return." - Daenerys III, AGOT
x
Dany gazed at her eggs sadly. What had she expected? A thousand years ago they had been alive, but now they were only pretty rocks. They could not make a dragon. - Daenerys VI, AGOT
x
To break her fast the queen sent to the kitchens for two boiled eggs, a loaf of bread, and a pot of honey. But when she cracked the first egg and found a bloody half-formed chick inside, her stomach roiled. - Cersei III, AFFC
___
Dornish eggs, and a bat in Sansa's stomach.
For herself, she tried a little of the Dornish eggs, but the peppers burned her mouth. Otherwise she only nibbled at the fruit and fish and honeycakes. Every time Joffrey looked at her, her tummy got so fluttery that she felt as though she'd swallowed a bat. - Sansa IV, ASOS
___
Sons, and daughters.
Should you ever have a son, Sansa, beat him frequently so he learns to mind you. I only had the one boy and I hardly beat him at all, so now he pays more heed to Butterbumps than he does to me. - Sansa I, ASOS
x
You'll know that, when you have a child."
"A child?" said Sansa, uncertainly.
Lysa waved a hand negligently. "Not for many years. You are too young to be a mother. One day you shall want children, though. Just as you will want to marry." - Sansa VI, ASOS
x
"I might get her with child."
"Aye, I'd hope so. A strong son or a lively laughing girl kissed by fire, and where's the harm in that?" - Jon II, ASOS
___
She added a third.
She pushed two of her snowballs together, added a third - Sansa VII, ASOS
___
Pearls.
Thank you, @decadelongsummer!
"The pearls symbolize fertility. The more pearls Your Worship wears, the more healthy children she will bear." - Daenerys VI, ADWD
x
Cersei Lannister ignored the question. "The cloak," she commanded, and the women brought it out: a long cloak of white velvet heavy with pearls. - Sansa III, ASOS
x
He showed them how each face bore the sigil of one of the great houses: ruby lion, emerald rose, onyx stag, silver trout, blue jade falcon, opal sun, and pearl direwolf. - Sansa IV, ASOS
x
The bodice was decorated with freshwater pearls, though. The cloak will cover them. The cloak was a deep green, with a large hood. She slipped the dress over her head, and donned the cloak, though she left the hood down for the moment. - Sansa V, ASOS
ACOK: Sansa VII (ch. 62) <- Daenerys V (ch. 63)
Thank you, @decadelongsummer!
She was breaking her fast on a bowl of cold shrimp-and-persimmon soup when Irri brought her a Qartheen gown, an airy confection of ivory samite patterned with seed pearls. "Take it away," Dany said. "The docks are no place for lady's finery." - Daenerys V, ACOK
___
Jeyne Westerling or Sansa Stark?
Queen. Yes, this pretty little girl is a queen, I must remember that. She was pretty, undeniably, with her chestnut curls and heart-shaped face, and that shy smile. Slender, but with good hips, Catelyn noted. She should have no trouble bearing children, at least. - Catelyn II, ASOS
x
And at Winterfell, Sansa was a little girl with auburn hair. My daughter is a maiden tall and fair, and her hair is chestnut. Men see what they expect to see, Alayne. - Alayne I, ASOS
x
"Your bosom will be as lovely as the queen's," the old woman said as she looped her string around Sansa's chest. "You should not hide it so."
The comment made her blush. Yet the last time she'd gone riding, she could not lace her jerkin all the way to the top, and the stableboy gaped at her as he helped her mount. Sometimes she caught grown men looking at her chest as well, and some of her tunics were so tight she could scarce breathe in them. - Sansa II, ASOS
x
"Jeyne," she called after, "there's one more thing Robb needs from you, though he may not know it yet himself. A king must have an heir."
The girl smiled at that. "My mother says the same. She makes a posset for me, herbs and milk and ale, to help make me fertile. I drink it every morning. I told Robb I'm sure to give him twins. An Eddard and a Brandon. He liked that, I think. We . . . we try most every day, my lady. Sometimes twice or more." The girl blushed very prettily. "I'll be with child soon, I promise. I pray to our Mother Above, every night." - Catelyn III, ASOS
x
If I give him sons, he may come to love me. She would name them Eddard and Brandon and Rickon, and raise them all to be as valiant as Ser Loras. And to hate Lannisters, too. In Sansa's dreams, her children looked just like the brothers she had lost. Sometimes there was even a girl who looked like Arya. - Sansa II, ASOS
x
Sansa had the grace to blush. She blushed prettily. - Arya I, AGOT
x
The girl did seem to have a good heart, just as Robb had said. And good hips, which might be more important. - Catelyn III, ASOS
x
Lady Tanda had been fleeing as well. "You have a good heart, my lady," she said to Sansa. - Sansa V, ASOS
___
Don't worry about Roslin, the mother was plenty fertile.
When she told him of Edmure's concerns about Lady Roslin's fertility, he chuckled. "Your lord brother need have no fear, Lady Catelyn. She's small, I'll grant you, and narrow in the hips, but her mother was the same, and Lady Bethany gave Lord Walder a child every year."
"How many lived past infancy?" she asked bluntly.
"Five." He ticked them off on fingers plump as sausages. - Catelyn VI, ASOS
___
For the one hundredth time: Mance or Jon?
The boy did not have a name yet, no more than Gilly's did. That was the wildling way. Not even Mance Rayder's son would get a name till his third year, it would seem, though Sam had heard the brothers calling him "the little prince" and "born-in-battle." - Samwell IV, ASOS
___
But what do they want?
He watched the child nurse at Gilly's breast, and then he watched Jon watch. Jon is smiling. A sad smile, still, but definitely a smile of sorts. Sam was glad to see it. It is the first time I've seen him smile since I got back. - Samwell IV, ASOS
x
I would need to steal her if I wanted her love, but she might give me children. I might someday hold a son of my own blood in my arms. A son was something Jon Snow had never dared dream of, since he decided to live his life on the Wall. I could name him Robb. - Jon XII, ASOS
x
I don't want any Lannister, she wanted to say. I want Willas, I want Highgarden and the puppies and the barge, and sons named Eddard and Bran and Rickon. - Sansa III, ASOS
+.+.+
Her Florian.
Sansa smoothed down her skirts and sat. "I think . . . fools, my lady? You mean . . . the sort in motley?"
"Feathers, in this case. What did you imagine I was speaking of? My son? Or these lovely ladies? No, don't blush, with your hair it makes you look like a pomegranate. All men are fools, if truth be told, but the ones in motley are more amusing than ones with crowns. - Sansa I, ASOS
x
"A fool and a knight?" said Jonquil. "I have never heard of such a thing."
"Sweet lady," said Florian, "all men are fools, and all men are knights, where women are concerned." - The Hedge Knight
x
The pool from which the town took its name, where legend said that Florian the Fool had first glimpsed Jonquil bathing with her sisters, was so choked with rotting corpses that the water had turned into a murky grey-green soup. - Jaime III, ASOS
+.+.+
Sansa hears a dreadful song, and looks to the wrong people for help.
"I CALLED FOR A KNIGHT, BUT YOU'RE A BEAR! A BEAR! A BEAR! ALL BLACK AND BROWN AND COVERED WITH HAIR!" - Sansa I, ASOS
x
Would he command his Kingsguard to strip her naked once again? The last time he had done that his uncle Tyrion had stopped him, but the Imp could not save her now. - Sansa I, ASOS
x
No one can save me but my Florian. Ser Dontos had promised he would help her escape, but not until the night of Joffrey's wedding. - Sansa I, ASOS
x
I wish the Hound were here. The night of the battle, Sandor Clegane had come to her chambers to take her from the city, but Sansa had refused. Sometimes she lay awake at night, wondering if she'd been wise. - Sansa I, ASOS
x
The words came tumbling out of her. "Yes. I will. I would like that more than anything. To wed Ser Loras, to love him . . ."
"Loras?" Lady Olenna sounded annoyed. "Don't be foolish, child. Kingsguard never wed. Didn't they teach you anything in Winterfell? We were speaking of my grandson Willas. He is a bit old for you, to be sure, but a dear boy for all that. Not the least bit oafish, and heir to Highgarden besides." - Sansa I, ASOS
x
Thankfully the dreadful song ends, and the cheese finally arrives.
Thank you, @karynlibrarian and @minitafan!
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Tyrion broke off a nibble of the cheese. It was sharp indeed, and veined with wine; very choice. "Whoever the king names will not have an easy time stepping into your armor, I can tell. Lord Mormont faces the same problem."
Lord Janos looked puzzled. - Tyrion II, ACOK
+.+.+
A little bear cub.
Tormund gave a shrug, as if to say he would never understand such madness. "Well, you are a free man now, but if you will not have the girl, best find yourself a she-bear. - Jon II, ASOS
x
"I do. Lysa has no cause for complaint." He smiled. "I wish you could see yourself, my lady. You are so beautiful. You're crusted over with snow like some little bear cub, but your face is flushed and you can scarcely breathe. - Sansa VII, ASOS
+.+.+
Jonnel (One-Eye) Stark, son of Lynara Stark, married to Sansa Stark.
Thank you, @occupyvenus!
"A blind boy, must be. Who ever heard of a king without ears? Why, his crown would fall straight down to his neck! Har!" - Jon I, ASOS
x
He could still hear wings, though the eagle was not in sight. Half his world was black. "My eye," he said in sudden panic, raising a hand to his face.
"It's only blood, Jon Snow. He missed the eye, just ripped your skin up some."
His face was throbbing. Tormund stood over them bellowing, he saw from his right eye as he rubbed blood from his left. 
[...]
Ygritte said, "Orell tried to take his eye out."
"It was him I asked. Has he lost his tongue? Perhaps he should, to spare us further lies."
Styr the Magnar drew a long knife. "The boy might see more clear with one eye, instead of two."
"Would you like to keep your eye, Jon?" asked the King-beyond-the-Wall. - Jon II, ASOS
x
Were there twenty or twenty thousand? In the dark there was no way to tell. This is a battle of blind men, but Mance has a few thousand more of them than we do. - Jon VIII, ASOS
x
Pyp turned aside to retch, and Jon found himself envying Maester Aemon his blindness. - Jon VIII, ASOS
x
"Aye," Slynt said. "A blind man with a chain about his neck, who does he think he is?"
Aemon Targaryen, Jon thought, a king's son and a king's brother and a king who might have been. But he said nothing. - Jon X, ASOS
x
The first time he had seen the Wall he had been younger than Devan, serving aboard the Cobblecat under Roro Uhoris, a Tyroshi known up and down the narrow sea as the Blind Bastard, though he was neither blind nor baseborn.  - Davos V, ASOS
+.+.+
Two Hearts that Beat as One: Jon and Sansa are forced into unwanted marriages.
Thank you, @esther-dot!
Mance nodded. "Good. You'll go with Jarl and Styr on the morrow, then. Both of you. Far be it from me to separate two hearts that beat as one." - Jon II, ASOS
x
Two hearts that beat as one. Mance Rayder's mocking words rang bitter in his head. Jon had seldom felt so confused. - Jon III, ASOS
___
"Here in the sight of gods and men," he said, "I do solemnly proclaim Tyrion of House Lannister and Sansa of House Stark to be man and wife, one flesh, one heart, one soul, now and forever, and cursed be the one who comes between them."
She had to bite her lip to keep from sobbing. - Sansa III, ASOS
x
If Tyrion did it, they will think I was part of it as well, she realized with a start of fear. How not? They were man and wife, and Joff had killed her father and mocked her with her brother's death. One flesh, one heart, one soul. - Sansa V, ASOS
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It doesn't compare to kissing a king.
They spent long afternoons doing needlework and talking over lemon cakes and honeyed wine, played at tiles of an evening, sang together in the castle sept . . . and often one or two of them would be chosen to share Margaery's bed, where they would whisper half the night away. Alla had a lovely voice, and when coaxed would play the woodharp and sing songs of chivalry and lost loves. Megga couldn't sing, but she was mad to be kissed. She and Alla played a kissing game sometimes, she confessed, but it wasn't the same as kissing a man, much less a king. - Sansa II, ASOS
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Sansa keeps hearing stories about favors.
As for Elinor, she was promised to a young squire, a son of Lord Ambrose; they would be wed as soon as he won his spurs. He had worn her favor in the Battle of the Blackwater, where he'd slain a Myrish crossbowman and a Mullendore man-at-arms. "Alyn said her favor made him fearless," said Megga. "He says he shouted her name for his battle cry, isn't that ever so gallant? Someday I want some champion to wear my favor, and kill a hundred men." Elinor told her to hush, but looked pleased all the same. - Sansa II, ASOS
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Your mother did not deserve him. She would not even give him her favor to wear when he fought Brandon Stark. I would have given him my favor. I gave him everything. He is mine now. - Sansa VII, ASOS
x
He grinned. "I will hold you to that promise, my lady. Until that day, may I wear your favor in the tourney?"
"You may not. It is promised to...another." She was not sure who as yet, but she knew she would find someone. - Alayne I, TWOW
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A Girl in Grey.
The Liddle took out a knife and whittled at a stick. "When there was a Stark in Winterfell, a maiden girl could walk the kingsroad in her name-day gown and still go unmolested, and travelers could find fire, bread, and salt at many an inn and holdfast. But the nights are colder now, and doors are closed. There's squids in the wolfswood, and flayed men ride the kingsroad asking after strangers." - Bran II, ASOS
x
"No. I mean, yes." He blushed. "The colors. Our arms are purple and white chequy, my lady. With gold coins. In the checks. Purple and white. Both." He studied her feet.
"There's a tale behind those coins," said Tyrion. "No doubt Pod will confide it to your toes one day. Just now we are expected at the Queen's Ballroom, however. Shall we?" - Sansa IV, ASOS
x
Arya XII, ASOS -> <- Tyrion IX, ASOS
"There's frost above us and snow in the high passes," the village elder said. "If you don't freeze or starve, the shadowcats will get you, or the cave bears. There's the clans as well. The Burned Men are fearless since Timett One-Eye came back from the war. And half a year ago, Gunthor son of Gurn led the Stone Crows down on a village not eight miles from here. They took every woman and every scrap of grain, and killed half the men. They have steel now, good swords and mail hauberks, and they watch the high road—the Stone Crows, the Milk Snakes, the Sons of the Mist, all of them. Might be you'd take a few with you, but in the end they'd kill you and make off with your daughter." - Arya XII, ASOS
x
He could send Podrick Payne questing after Shagga, he supposed, but there were so many hiding places in the deep of the kingswood that outlaws often evaded capture for decades. And Pod sometimes has difficulty finding the kitchens when I sent him down for cheese. Timett son of Timett would likely be back in the Mountains of the Moon by now.  - Tyrion IX, ASOS
x
A groom led a fine grey mare out the stable door. On her back was mounted a skinny hollow-eyed girl wrapped in a heavy cloak. Grey, it was, like the dress beneath it, and trimmed with white satin. The clasp that pinned it to her breast was wrought in the shape of a wolf's head with slitted opal eyes. The girl's long brown hair blew wild in the wind. She had a pretty face, he thought, but her eyes were sad and wary. - Jaime IX, ASOS
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The Wall defends Jon and Sansa.
"I hate this Wall," she said in a low angry voice. "Can you feel how cold it is?"
"It's made of ice," Jon pointed out.
"You know nothing, Jon Snow. This wall is made o' blood."
Nor had it drunk its fill. By sunset, two of the Thenns had fallen from the ladder to their deaths, but they were the last. It was near midnight before Jon reached the top. The stars were out again, and Ygritte was trembling from the climb. "I almost fell," she said, with tears in her eyes. "Twice. Thrice. The Wall was trying t' shake me off, I could feel it." One of the tears broke free and trickled slowly down her cheek. - Jon IV, ASOS
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He had always had a yen to see the Titan of Braavos. Perhaps that would please Sansa. Gently, he spoke of Braavos, and met a wall of sullen courtesy as icy and unyielding as the Wall he had walked once in the north. It made him weary. Then and now. - Tyrion VIII, ASOS
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"Courtesy is a lady's armor," Sansa said. Her septa had always told her that.
"I am your husband. You can take off your armor now." - Sansa III, ASOS
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Cold courtesy.
Perhaps that would please Sansa. Gently, he spoke of Braavos, and met a wall of sullen courtesy as icy and unyielding as the Wall he had walked once in the north. It made him weary. Then and now. - Tyrion VIII, ASOS
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Jon Snow sat up suddenly, and the three men froze at the sound of the slosh. "My lords," he said with cold courtesy. - Jon XII, ASOS
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The Wall is yours, Jon.
The Wall is mine, Jon reminded himself whenever he felt his strength flagging. - Jon VII, ASOS
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 The Wall is mine, he reminded himself. - Jon IX, ASOS
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Gently, he spoke of Braavos, and met a wall of sullen courtesy as icy and unyielding as the Wall he had walked once in the north. - Tyrion VIII, ASOS
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Jon and Sansa are left in charge, and reassure terrified people during a battle.
Thank you, @aegor-bamfsteel!
He looked around the ring of firelit faces. "I need two bows and two spears to help me hold the tunnel if they break the gate." More than ten stepped forward, and the smith picked his four. "Jon, you have the Wall till I return."
For a moment Jon thought he had misheard. It had sounded as if Noye were leaving him in command. "My lord?"
"Lord? I'm a blacksmith. I said, the Wall is yours."
There are older men, Jon wanted to say, better men. I am still as green as summer grass. I'm wounded, and I stand accused of desertion. His mouth had gone bone dry. "Aye," he managed. [...] "The Wall will stop them," Jon heard himself say. He turned and said it again, louder. "The Wall will stop them. The Wall defends itself." Hollow words, but he needed to say them, almost as much as his brothers needed to hear them. "Mance wants to unman us with his numbers. Does he think we're stupid?" He was shouting now, his leg forgotten, and every man was listening. "The chariots, the horsemen, all those fools on foot . . . what are they going to do to us up here? Any of you ever see a mammoth climb a wall?" He laughed, and Pyp and Owen and half a dozen more laughed with him. "They're nothing, they're less use than our straw brothers here, they can't reach us, they can't hurt us, and they don't frighten us, do they?" - Jon VIII, ASOS
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"Oh, gods," an old woman wailed. "We're lost, the battle's lost, she's running." Several children were crying. They can smell the fear. Sansa found herself alone on the dais. Should she stay here, or run after the queen and plead for her life?
She never knew why she got to her feet, but she did. "Don't be afraid," she told them loudly. "The queen has raised the drawbridge. This is the safest place in the city. There's thick walls, the moat, the spikes . . ."
[...]
Sansa raised her hands for quiet. "Joffrey's come back to the castle. He's not hurt. They're still fighting, that's all I know, they're fighting bravely. The queen will be back soon." The last was a lie, but she had to soothe them. She noticed the fools standing under the galley. "Moon Boy, make us laugh."
[...]
Sansa went to Ser Lancel and knelt beside him. His wound was bleeding afresh where the queen had struck him. "Madness," he gasped. "Gods, the Imp was right, was right . . ."
"Help him," Sansa commanded two of the serving men. One just looked at her and ran, flagon and all. Other servants were leaving the hall as well, but she could not help that. Together, Sansa and the serving man got the wounded knight back on his feet. "Take him to Maester Frenken." - Sansa VII, ACOK
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Jon the Gargoyle.
Thank you, @dontbipanicjonsa and @minitafan!
When the moonstones hung from Sansa's ears and about her neck, the queen nodded. "Yes. The gods have been kind to you, Sansa. You are a lovely girl. It seems almost obscene to squander such sweet innocence on that gargoyle."
"What gargoyle?" Sansa did not understand. - Sansa III, ASOS
x
He raised his eyes to gaze up at the walls. In place of merlons, a thousand grotesques and gargoyles looked down on him, each different from all the others; wyverns, griffins, demons, manticores, minotaurs, basilisks, hellhounds, cockatrices, and a thousand queerer creatures sprouted from the castle's battlements as if they'd grown there. - Davos V, ASOS
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Ser Garlan laughed. "I was a plump little boy, I fear, and we do have an uncle called Garth the Gross. So Willas struck first, though not before threatening me with Garlan the Greensick, Garlan the Galling, and Garlan the Gargoyle." - Sansa III, ASOS
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Again he had the answer. "It's been snowing on your castle, my lady," he pointed out. "What do the gargoyles look like when they're covered with snow?" - Sansa VII, ASOS
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Tyrion, the Targaryen groom.
Thank you, @butterflies-dragons!
Tyrion wore a doublet of black velvet covered with golden scrollwork, thigh-high boots that added three inches to his height, a chain of rubies and lions' heads. - Sansa III, ASOS
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Sansa, the Targaryen wedding guest.
Sansa wore a gown of silvery satin trimmed in vair, with dagged sleeves that almost touched the floor, lined in soft purple felt. Shae had arranged her hair artfully in a delicate silver net winking with dark purple gemstones. - Tyrion VIII, ASOS
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Laughing despite everything.
Thank you, @agentrouka-blog!
It was so sweet and silly that Sansa had to laugh, despite everything. Afterward she was absurdly grateful. Somehow the laughter made her hopeful again, if only for a little while. Smiling, she let the music take her, losing herself in the steps, in the sound of flute and pipes and harp, in the rhythm of the drum . . . and from time to time in Ser Garlan's arms, when the dance brought them together. - Sansa III, ASOS
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Jon had to laugh. Even now, even here. Ygritte had been fond of Longspear Ryk. He hoped he found some joy with Tormund's Munda. Someone needed to find some joy somewhere. - Jon X, ASOS
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A shy maid on her wedding night.
Her hands trembled as she began fumbling at her clothes. She had ten thumbs instead of fingers, and all of them were broken. Yet somehow she managed the laces and buttons, and her cloak and gown and girdle and undersilk slid to the floor, until finally she was stepping out of her smallclothes. Gooseprickles covered her arms and legs. She kept her eyes on the floor, too shy to look at him, but when she was done she glanced up and found him staring. There was hunger in his green eye, it seemed to her, and fury in the black. Sansa did not know which scared her more. - Sansa III, ASOS
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Qhorin came and stood over him as the first flame rose up flickering from the shavings of bark and dead dry pine needles. "As shy as a maid on her wedding night," the big ranger said in a soft voice, "and near as fair. Sometimes a man forgets how pretty a fire can be."
He was not a man you'd expect to speak of maids and wedding nights. So far as Jon knew, Qhorin had spent his whole life in the Watch. Did he ever love a maid or have a wedding? He could not ask. Instead he fanned the fire. When the blaze was all acrackle, he peeled off his stiff gloves to warm his hands, and sighed, wondering if ever a kiss had felt as good. - Jon VIII, ACOK
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Two imprisoned husbands? Quickly after Tyrion is arrested, Jon Snow joins him.
"Hush, you'll be the death of us. I did nothing. Come, we must away, they'll search for you. Your husband's been arrested."
"Tyrion?" she said, shocked.
"Do you have another husband? The Imp, the dwarf uncle, she thinks he did it." He grabbed her hand and pulled at her. "This way, we must away, quickly now, have no fear." - Sansa V, ASOS
x
Slynt purpled. "Murder? You insolent pup. King Robert was not even cold when Lord Eddard moved against his son." He rose to his feet; a shorter man than Mormont, but thick about the chest and arms, with a gut to match. A small gold spear tipped with red enamel pinned his cloak at the shoulder. "Your father died by the sword, but he was highborn, a King's Hand. For you, a noose will serve. Ser Alliser, take this turncloak to an ice cell." - Jon IX, ASOS
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A dragon knight shows up all over Sansa's chapter.
They continued down the serpentine and across a small sunken courtyard. Ser Dontos shoved open a heavy door and lit a taper. They were inside a long gallery. Along the walls stood empty suits of armor, dark and dusty, their helms crested with rows of scales that continued down their backs. As they hurried past, the taper's light made the shadows of each scale stretch and twist. The hollow knights are turning into dragons, she thought. - Sansa V, ASOS
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Sansa dared not look down. She kept her eyes on the face of the cliff, making certain of each step before reaching for the next. The stone was rough and cold. Sometimes she could feel her fingers slipping, and the handholds were not as evenly spaced as she would have liked. The bells would not stop ringing. Before she was halfway down her arms were trembling and she knew that she was going to fall. One more step, she told herself, one more step. She had to keep moving. If she stopped, she would never start again, and dawn would find her still clinging to the cliff, frozen in fear. One more step, and one more step.
The ground took her by surprise. She stumbled and fell, her heart pounding. When she rolled onto her back and stared up at from where she had come, her head swam dizzily and her fingers clawed at the dirt. I did it. I did it, I didn't fall, I made the climb and now I'm going home. - Sansa V, ASOS
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One step and then another, Jon told himself. One step and then another, and I will not fall. [...]
One step and then another, he resumed when the gale subsided. One step and then another, and I will not fall. [...]
One step and then another, he thought, clinging tight. [...]
Don't look down. Keep your weight above your feet. Don't look down. Look at the rock in front of you. There's a good handhold, yes. Don't look down. I can catch a breath on that ledge there, all I need to do is reach it. Never look down. - Jon VI, ACOK
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A ghostly shape appears at the hint of dawn.
The eastern sky was vague with the first hint of dawn when Sansa finally saw a ghostly shape in the darkness ahead - Sansa V, ASOS
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Jon and Sansa are drowning.
Thank you, @minitafan!
Ser Loras in white silk, so pure, innocent, beautiful. The dimples at the corner of his mouth when he smiled. The sweetness of his laugh, the warmth of his hand. She could only imagine what it would be like to pull up his tunic and caress the smooth skin underneath, to stand on her toes and kiss him, to run her fingers through those thick brown curls and drown in his deep brown eyes. A flush crept up her neck. - Sansa I, ASOS
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Longclaw seemed heavier than lead in his hand, too heavy to lift. The man kept staring at him, with eyes as big and black as wells. I will fall into those eyes and drown. - Jon V, ASOS
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Petyr studied her eyes, as if seeing them for the first time. "You have your mother's eyes. Honest eyes, and innocent. Blue as a sunlit sea. When you are a little older, many a man will drown in those eyes." - Sansa I, AFFC
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Sam, Gilly, and weird sister thoughts while sleeping.
He liked sleeping next to her. It made him remember times long past, when he had shared a huge bed at Horn Hill with two of his sisters. - Samwell III, ASOS
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When the feast was done he went up to sleep; not to the lord's bedchamber where his mother and father lived but to the room he had once shared with his sisters. Only instead of his sisters it was Gilly waiting in the huge soft bed, wearing nothing but a big shaggy fur, milk leaking from her breasts. - Samwell III, ASOS
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The blood of Winterfell.
When the dreams took him, he found himself back home once more, splashing in the hot pools beneath a huge white weirwood that had his father's face. Ygritte was with him, laughing at him, shedding her skins till she was naked as her name day, trying to kiss him, but he couldn't, not with his father watching. He was the blood of Winterfell, a man of the Night's Watch. I will not father a bastard, he told her. I will not. I will not. - Jon VI, ASOS
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I am not your daughter, she thought. I am Sansa Stark, Lord Eddard's daughter and Lady Catelyn's, the blood of Winterfell. - Sansa I, AFFC
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Sons and daughters of Winterfell.
Lord Commander Mormont made you his steward. You are a son of Winterfell, a nephew of Benjen Stark. It must be you or no one. The Wall is yours, Jon Snow. - Jon VIII, ASOS
x
I forgot, you've been hiding under a rock. The northern girl. Winterfell's daughter. We heard she killed the king with a spell, and afterward changed into a wolf with big leather wings like a bat, and flew out a tower window. - Arya XIII, ASOS
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Stone and Snow are north of the Neck.
Lord Redwyne laughed. "What is there north of the Neck that any sane man would want? If Greyjoy will trade swords and sails for stone and snow, I say do it, and count ourselves lucky." - Tyrion III, ASOS
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I will make you a match with a high lord who's worthy of you.
It was not as though he was the first man ever to keep a concubine. Sansa's own oh-so-honorable father had given her a bastard brother. - Tyrion VII, ASOS
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Jon and Ygritte open and close like their foils.
Jon slid his dirk free, grabbing the man by the hair and jamming the point of the knife up under his chin as he reached for his—no, her—
His hand froze. "A girl." - Jon VI, ACOK
x
"I never meant to steal you," he said. "I never knew you were a girl until my knife was at your throat." - Jon III, ASOS
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"Just as if I was one of those true knights you love so well, yes. What do you think a knight is for, girl? You think it's all taking favors from ladies and looking fine in gold plate? Knights are for killing." He laid the edge of his longsword against her neck, just under her ear. Sansa could feel the sharpness of the steel. - Sansa IV, ACOK
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"Oh." Ygritte cupped his cheek with her hand. "You know nothing, Jon Snow," she sighed, dying. - Jon VII
x
Some instinct made her lift her hand and cup his cheek with her fingers. The room was too dark for her to see him, but she could feel the stickiness of the blood, and a wetness that was not blood. "Little bird," he said once more, his voice raw and harsh as steel on stone. Then he rose from the bed. Sansa heard cloth ripping, followed by the softer sound of retreating footsteps. - Sansa VII, ACOK
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Prince Aemon keeps following Sansa around the story.
ASOS: Jon XII (ch. 79) -> Sansa VII (ch. 80)
They were not little boys when they fought, but knights and mighty heroes. "I'm Prince Aemon the Dragonknight," Jon would call out, and Robb would shout back, "Well, I'm Florian the Fool." Or Robb would say, "I'm the Young Dragon," and Jon would reply, "I'm Ser Ryam Redwyne." - Jon XII, ASOS
x
"Sweet one," her father said gently, "listen to me. When you're old enough, I will make you a match with a high lord who's worthy of you, someone brave and gentle and strong. This match with Joffrey was a terrible mistake. That boy is no Prince Aemon, you must believe me." - Sansa III, AGOT
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The gift of a sword, even a sword as fine as Longclaw, did not make him a Mormont. Nor was he Aemon Targaryen. - Jon IX, AGOT
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AGOT: Sansa IV (ch. 51) -> Jon VII (ch. 52)
She pulled a chair close to the hearth, took down one of her favorite books, and lost herself in the stories of Florian and Jonquil, of Lady Shella and the Rainbow Knight, of valiant Prince Aemon and his doomed love for his brother's queen. - Sansa IV, AGOT
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ACOK: Jon VI (ch. 51) <- Sansa IV (ch. 52) -> Jon VII (ch. 53)
She called for the heroes from the songs, for Florian and Ser Ryam Redwyne and Prince Aemon the Dragonknight, but no one heard. - Sansa IV, ACOK
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"No doubt you're right. So why don't you just eat your broth like a good girl and wait for Symeon Star-Eyes and Prince Aemon the Dragonknight to come rescue you, sweetling. I'm sure it won't be very long now." - Sansa V, ACOK
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The theme of wanton behaviour suddenly explodes for two characters who have never exhibited wanton behaviour.
He was a bastard, after all. Everyone knew that bastards were wanton and treacherous by nature, having been born of lust and deceit. - Jon VII, ASOS
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Bastard children were born from lust and lies, men said; their nature was wanton and treacherous. - Jon X, ASOS
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Where are you going? Are you afraid? Such wanton behavior must be punished, but I will not be hard on you. - Sansa VII, ASOS
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"So you admit it now? It was you, just as I thought. You are as wanton as your mother." - Sansa VII, ASOS
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Most succumb to their baser selves.
"I have heard that in the Sunset Kingdoms men take solemn vows to keep chaste and father no children, but live only for their duty. Is it not so?"
"It is," Arstan said, when the question was put. "There are many such orders. The maesters of the Citadel, the septons and septas who serve the Seven, the silent sisters of the dead, the Kingsguard and the Night's Watch . . ."
"Poor things," growled the slaver, after the translation. "Men were not made to live thus. Their days are a torment of temptation, any fool must see, and no doubt most succumb to their baser selves. Not so our Unsullied. They are wed to their swords in a way that your Sworn Brothers cannot hope to match. No woman can ever tempt them, nor any man." - Daenerys II, ASOS
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Cinderella, her evil step-mother, and the glass slipper. Where's Prince Charming?
Thank you, @agentrouka-blog!
Up in the gallery the musicians took up their pipes and horns and fiddles again, and began to play "The Queen Took Off Her Sandal, the King Took Off His Crown." - Catelyn VII, ASOS
x
They brought her new shoes as well, slippers of soft grey doeskin that hugged her feet like lovers. "You are very beautiful, my lady," the seamstress said when she was dressed. - Sansa III, ASOS
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Lysa threw herself into Littlefinger's arms, sobbing. As they hugged, Sansa crawled from the Moon Door on hands and knees and wrapped her arms around the nearest pillar. She could feel her heart pounding. There was snow in her hair and her right shoe was missing. It must have fallen. She shuddered, and hugged the pillar tighter. - Sansa VII, ASOS
x
Irri slid the slippers onto Dany's feet. They were gilded leather, decorated with green freshwater pearls. Does the butcher king believe a pair of pretty slippers will win my hand? "King Cleon is most generous. You may thank him for his lovely gift." Lovely, but made for a child. Dany had small feet, yet the pointed slippers mashed her toes together. - Daenerys I, ADWD
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One of her sandals had slipped off during her wild flight from Meereen and she had left the other up by Drogon's cave, preferring to go barefoot rather than half-shod. - Daenerys X, ADWD
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Will it be a Dornish princess for Aegon, and a northern girl for Aemon? Double ouch.
"Viserys said once that it was my fault, for being born too late." She had denied it hotly, she remembered, going so far as to tell Viserys that it was his fault for not being born a girl. He beat her cruelly for that insolence. "If I had been born more timely, he said, Rhaegar would have married me instead of Elia, and it would all have come out different. If Rhaegar had been happy in his wife, he would not have needed the Stark girl." - Daenerys IV, ASOS
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Sansa and Jon are all alone in bed.
Jon wondered where Ghost was now. Had he gone to Castle Black, or was he was running with some wolfpack in the woods? He had no sense of the direwolf, not even in his dreams. It made him feel as if part of himself had been cut off. Even with Ygritte sleeping beside him, he felt alone. He did not want to die alone. - Jon V, ASOS
x
She threw back the coverlets. I must be brave. Her torments would soon be ended, one way or the other. If Lady was here, I would not be afraid. Lady was dead, though; Robb, Bran, Rickon, Arya, her father, her mother, even Septa Mordane. All of them are dead but me. She was alone in the world now.
Her lord husband was not beside her, but she was used to that. Tyrion was a bad sleeper and often rose before the dawn. - Sansa IV, ASOS
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Loopholes.
"By the High Septon or a Council of Faith. Our present High Septon is a trained seal who barks prettily on command. Moon Boy is more like to annul my marriage than he is." - Tyrion IV, ASOS
x
Robb's fingers brushed the pommel of his sword. "If I could I'd take his ugly head off. Sansa would be a widow then, and free. There's no other way that I can see. They made her speak the vows before a septon and don a crimson cloak." - Catelyn IV, ASOS
x
I wonder what the High Septon would have to say about the sanctity of oaths sworn while dead drunk, chained to a wall, with a sword pressed to your chest? Not that Jaime was truly concerned about that fat fraud, or the gods he claimed to serve. - Jaime I, ASOS
x
"You gave her to him?" she cried, dismayed. "You swore an oath to Lady Catelyn . . ."
"With a sword at my throat, but never mind. Lady Catelyn's dead. I could not give her back her daughters even if I had them. And the girl my father sent with Steelshanks was not Arya Stark." - Jaime IX, ASOS
x
"Vows made at sword point are not valid," the maester argued. - Bran V, ACOK
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"She is old enough to be Lady of Winterfell once her brother is dead. Claim her maidenhood and you will be one step closer to claiming the north. Get her with child, and the prize is all but won. Do I need to remind you that a marriage that has not been consummated can be set aside?" - Tyrion IV, ASOS
x
Jaime sighed. "Then let them wed. It will be years before Tommen is old enough to consummate the marriage. And until he does, the union can always be set aside. Give Tyrell his wedding and send him off to play at war." - Jaime I, AFFC
x
"The monster has tied us a thorny knot," the old knight told Maester Luwin. "Like it or no, Lady Hornwood was his wife. He made her say the vows before both septon and heart tree, and bedded her that very night before witnesses. She signed a will naming him as heir and fixed her seal to it." - Bran V, ACOK
x
Septon Cellador cleared his throat. "Lord Slynt," he said, "this boy refused to swear his vows properly in the sept, but went beyond the Wall to say his words before a heart tree. His father's gods, he said, but they are wildling gods as well."
"They are the gods of the north, Septon." Maester Aemon was courteous, but firm. - Jon IX, ASOS
x
(A vow sworn in a sept . . .)
"Jon." Melisandre was so close he could feel the warmth of her breath. "R'hllor is the only true god. A vow sworn to a tree has no more power than one sworn to your shoes. Open your heart and let the light of the Lord come in. Burn these weirwoods, and accept Winterfell as a gift of the Lord of Light." - Jon XI, ASOS
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Her claim.
"The girl's happiness is not my purpose, nor should it be yours. Our alliances in the south may be as solid as Casterly Rock, but there remains the north to win, and the key to the north is Sansa Stark." - Tyrion III, ASOS
x
The thought made Sansa weary. All she knew of Robert Arryn was that he was a little boy, and sickly. It is not me she wants her son to marry, it is my claim. No one will ever marry me for love. - Sansa VI, ASOS
x
"How can I lose men I do not have? I had hoped to bestow Winterfell on a northman, you may recall. A son of Eddard Stark. He threw my offer in my face." Stannis Baratheon with a grievance was like a mastiff with a bone; he gnawed it down to splinters.
"By right Winterfell should go to my sister Sansa." - Jon I, ADWD
+.+.+
Tyrion wants Winterfell and Sansa. Jon wants Winterfell and . . .
I want her, he realized. I want Winterfell, yes, but I want her as well, child or woman or whatever she is. I want to comfort her. I want to hear her laugh. I want her to come to me willingly, to bring me her joys and her sorrows and her lust. - Tyrion IV, ASOS
x
When Jon had been very young, too young to understand what it meant to be a bastard, he used to dream that one day Winterfell might be his. - Jon XI, ASOS
x
I would need to steal her if I wanted her love, but she might give me children. I might someday hold a son of my own blood in my arms. A son was something Jon Snow had never dared dream of, since he decided to live his life on the Wall. I could name him Robb. Val would want to keep her sister's son, but we could foster him at Winterfell, and Gilly's boy as well. Sam would never need to tell his lie. We'd find a place for Gilly too, and Sam could come visit her once a year or so. Mance's son and Craster's would grow up brothers, as I once did with Robb.
He wanted it, Jon knew then. He wanted it as much as he had ever wanted anything. I have always wanted it, he thought, guiltily. May the gods forgive me. It was a hunger inside him, sharp as a dragonglass blade. A hunger . . . he could feel it. - Jon XII, ASOS
+.+.+
Count on Jon and Sansa to always forget someone.
Sansa had grown up with three brothers. She never thought to have a claim, but with Bran and Rickon dead . . . It doesn't matter, there's still Robb, he's a man grown now, and soon he'll wed and have a son. - Sansa II, ASOS
x
She threw back the coverlets. I must be brave. Her torments would soon be ended, one way or the other. If Lady was here, I would not be afraid. Lady was dead, though; Robb, Bran, Rickon, Arya, her father, her mother, even Septa Mordane. All of them are dead but me. She was alone in the world now. - Sansa IV, ASOS
+.+.+
They have the look.
"I see it now," the Lady Lysa said, as she set the core aside. "You look so much like Catelyn."
"It's kind of you to say so."
"It was not meant as flattery. If truth be told, you look too much like Catelyn. - Sansa VI, ASOS
x
Stannis snorted. "I know Janos Slynt. And I knew Ned Stark as well. Your father was no friend of mine, but only a fool would doubt his honor or his honesty. You have his look." - Jon XI, ASOS
+.+.+
He's no Loras, but I don't think she'll be disappointed.
She could never hold a picture of Willas long in her head, though; her imaginings kept turning him back into Ser Loras, young and graceful and beautiful. You must not think of him like that, she told herself. Or else he may see the disappointment in your eyes when you meet, and how could he marry you then, knowing it was his brother you loved? - Sansa II, ASOS
x
She remembered her own childish disappointment, the first time she had laid eyes on Eddard Stark. She had pictured him as a younger version of his brother Brandon, but that was wrong. Ned was shorter and plainer of face, and so somber. - Catelyn V, ASOS
+.+.+
Throwaway lines that make us smile.
Dress warmly, Ser Dontos had told her, and dress dark. She had no blacks, so she chose a dress of thick brown wool. - Sansa V, ASOS
+.+.+
Shades of Jon.
"The dwarf's wife did the murder with him," swore an archer in Lord Rowan's livery. "Afterward, she vanished from the hall in a puff of brimstone, and a ghostly direwolf was seen prowling the Red Keep, blood dripping from his jaws." - Sansa VII, ASOS
x
"I forgot, you've been hiding under a rock. The northern girl. Winterfell's daughter. We heard she killed the king with a spell, and afterward changed into a wolf with big leather wings like a bat, and flew out a tower window. But she left the dwarf behind and Cersei means to have his head." - Arya XIII, ASOS
+.+.+
Jon hears a familiar song.
Thank you, @minitafan!
Yet still the drums beat on, the trebuchets shuddered and thumped, and the sound of skinpipes came wafting through the night like the songs of strange fierce birds. Septon Cellador began to sing as well, his voice tremulous and thick with wine.
Gentle Mother, font of mercy - Jon VIII, ASOS
x
"Sing, little bird. Sing for your little life."
Her throat was dry and tight with fear, and every song she had ever known had fled from her mind. Please don’t kill me, she wanted to scream, please don’t. She could feel him twisting the point, pushing it into her throat, and she almost closed her eyes again, but then she remembered. It was not the song of Florian and Jonquil, but it was a song. Her voice sounded small and thin and tremulous in her ears.
Gentle Mother, font of mercy - Sansa VII, ACOK
+.+.+
Arya's sister catches a crow.
Thank you, @decadelongsummer!
The crows were there too, screaming at the wolves and filling the air with feathers. Their blood was hotter, and one of her sisters had snapped at one as it took flight and caught it by the wing. It made her want a crow herself. She wanted to taste the blood, to hear the bones crunch between her teeth, to fill her belly with warm flesh instead of cold. She was hungry and the meat was all around, but she knew she could not eat. - Arya XII, ASOS
+.+.+
Alayne Stone or Jon Snow?
"I have no gallant knights in my service, Alayne. Such a tale would draw unwanted questions as a corpse draws crows. It is rude to pry into the origins of a man's natural children, however." He cocked his head. "So, who are you?"
"Alayne . . . Stone, would it be?" When he nodded, she said, "But who is my mother?" - Sansa VI, ASOS
+.+.+
Samwell Tarly or Sansa Stark?
Sobbing, he took another step. The snow swirled down around him. [...]
Sobbing, he took another step. The crust was broken where he set his feet, otherwise he did not think he could have moved at all. [...]
Sobbing, he took another step. - Samwell I, ASOS
x
One more step, she told herself, one more step. She had to keep moving. If she stopped, she would never start again, and dawn would find her still clinging to the cliff, frozen in fear. One more step, and one more step. - Sansa V, ASOS
___
Maslyn screamed for mercy. Why had he suddenly remembered that? It was nothing he wanted to remember. The man had stumbled backward, dropping his sword, pleading, yielding, even yanking off his thick black glove and thrusting it up before him as if it were a gauntlet. He was still shrieking for quarter as the wight lifted him in the air by the throat and near ripped the head off him. The dead have no mercy left in them, and the Others . . . no, I mustn't think of that, don't think, don't remember, just walk, just walk, just walk.
[...]
Why must he remember the fight at the Fist? He didn't want to remember. Not that. He tried to make himself remember his mother, or his little sister Talla, or that girl Gilly at Craster's Keep. - Samwell I, ASOS
x
Sansa did not know what had happened to Jeyne, who had disappeared from her rooms afterward, never to be mentioned again. She tried not to think of them too often, yet sometimes the memories came unbidden, and then it was hard to hold back the tears. - Sansa II, ACOK
___
Sam knew a hundred songs, but when he tried to think of one he couldn't. The words had all gone from his head. He sobbed again and said, "I don't know any songs, Grenn. I did know some, but now I don't." - Samwell I, ASOS
x
Her throat was dry and tight with fear, and every song she had ever known had fled from her mind. Please don't kill me, she wanted to scream, please don't. - Sansa VII, ACOK
___
Whatever pride his lord father might have felt at Samwell's birth vanished as the boy grew up plump, soft, and awkward. Sam loved to listen to music and make his own songs, to wear soft velvets, to play in the castle kitchen beside the cooks, drinking in the rich smells as he snitched lemon cakes and blueberry tarts. His passions were books and kittens and dancing, clumsy as he was. But he grew ill at the sight of blood, and wept to see even a chicken slaughtered. - Jon IV, ASOS
+.+.+
Remembering Robb.
She had last seen snow the day she'd left Winterfell. That was a lighter fall than this, she remembered. Robb had melting flakes in his hair when he hugged me, and the snowball Arya tried to make kept coming apart in her hands. - Sansa VII, ASOS
x
He remembered Robb as he had last seen him, standing in the yard with snow melting in his auburn hair. - Jon IX, AGOT
+.+.+
Jon's better at sums.
Thank you, @trins-trins!
She was looking at him the way she used to look at him at Winterfell, whenever he had bested Robb at swords or sums or most anything. - Jon XII, ASOS
x
It hurt that the one thing Arya could do better than her sister was ride a horse. Well, that and manage a household. Sansa had never had much of a head for figures. If she did marry Prince Joff, Arya hoped for his sake that he had a good steward. - Arya I, AGOT
x
"Matthar, to the rangers. Dareon, to the stewards. Todder, to the rangers. Jon, to the stewards."
The stewards! For a moment Jon could not believe what he had heard. - Jon VI, AGOT
+.+.+
Oh no, does Willas have a bad leg?
"Willas has a bad leg but a good heart," said Margaery. "He used to read to me when I was a little girl, and draw me pictures of the stars. You will love him as much as we do, Sansa." - Sansa I, ASOS
x
Suddenly he was too weary to stand, and his leg was agony from knee to groin. He fumbled for his crutch. - Jon VIII, ASOS
+.+.+
Ashford alert: Willas was supposed to be another Leo.
The Fat Flower thrust him into tourneys at too tender an age, just as he did with the other two. He wanted another Leo Longthorn, and made himself a cripple. - Tyrion V, ASOS
+.+.+
Here we go again! A plot device does her best Sansa Stark impression.
Val looked at him with pale grey eyes. "He always climbed too fast." She was as fair as he'd remembered, slender, full-breasted, graceful even at rest, with high sharp cheekbones and a thick braid of honey-colored hair that fell to her waist. - Jon X, ASOS
x
Her breath was white as well … but her eyes were blue - Jon XI, ADWD
vs.
Worse, she was beautiful. - Arya I, AGOT
x
"Your bosom will be as lovely as the queen's," the old woman said as she looped her string around Sansa's chest. "You should not hide it so." - Sansa II, ASOS
x
"I had heard that Lord Littlefinger's daughter was fair of face and full of grace, but no one ever told me that she was a thief." - Alayne I, TWOW
x
Sansa had gotten their mother's fine high cheekbones - Arya I, AGOT
x
"OH, SWEET SHE WAS, AND PURE, AND FAIR! THE MAID WITH HONEY IN HER HAIR!" - Sansa I, ASOS
x
Petyr studied her eyes, as if seeing them for the first time. "You have your mother's eyes. Honest eyes, and innocent. Blue as a sunlit sea. When you are a little older, many a man will drown in those eyes." - Sansa I, AFFC
___
Then Ghost emerged from between two trees, with Val beside him.
They look as though they belong together. Val was clad all in white; white woolen breeches tucked into high boots of bleached white leather, white bearskin cloak pinned at the shoulder with a carved weirwood face, white tunic with bone fastenings. Her breath was white as well … but her eyes were blue, her long braid the color of dark honey, her cheeks flushed red from the cold. It had been a long while since Jon Snow had seen a sight so lovely. - Jon XI, ADWD
vs.
She donned silken smallclothes and a linen shift, and over that a warm dress of blue lambswool. Two pairs of hose for her legs, boots that laced up to her knees, heavy leather gloves, and finally a hooded cloak of soft white fox fur.
[...]
He smiled. "I wish you could see yourself, my lady. You are so beautiful. You're crusted over with snow like some little bear cub, but your face is flushed and you can scarcely breathe. How long have you been out here? You must be very cold. Let me warm you, Sansa. - Sansa VII, ASOS
+.+.+
ASOS: PART IV
Touch me.
Chapter Transitions
+.+.+
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ridley-was-a-cat · 8 months
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What I Watched This Fortnight – 9/17- 9/30
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Space Adventure Cobra – RetroCrush added this to their streaming catalog just as everyone was posting their remembrances after the mangaka passed away, so I figured I should probably see what it was about. What I got was a interstellar romp featuring a blond-haired frat boy with a gun-arm and a smorgasbord of comic book villains and nearly naked women that entertained me despite my better judgement. It’s directed by Osamu Dezaki, with all the pastel freeze frames and three pans he was known for, and still looks pretty darn good for a 40-year-old anime. If you’re ever in the mood for a turn-your-brain-off sort of adventure peppered with smugly delivered one-liners, this should deliver the goods. 7/10
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Project Blue Earth SOS – I found this one night while randomly poking around Crunchyroll’s library, and it’s a nice little retro-futuristic sci-fi that’s much better than its MAL score lets on. It’s set around the year 2000 in an alternate timeline Earth where humanity has developed powerful engines that allow for near-light speed travel, leading them to be targeted by an alien civilization bent on subjugating the planet. Rising up in opposition are two brilliant teenagers, one the son of the manufacturer of the powerful engines, and the other the son of astronauts killed in a space disaster years earlier, who work together with a quasi-governmental secret agency to drive them away. The art style is vibrant and colorful with a delightfully 1950s ray gun sci-fi vibe, and the story had lots of twists and turns and revelations straight out of a midcentury B-movie. 7/10
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Initial D: Extra Stage – This two-episode OVA follows the driver of the blue Sileighty from Usui Pass as she faces down a challenge on the road and one in her love life. The first episode, Beyond Impact Blue, has her racing one of the Lan Evo drivers from the Emperors after he insults female drivers as a whole and challenges her to what he assumes will be an easy race for him. The second episode, Sentimental White, has her go on a date with one of the divers from the Night Kids, who suggests that he would want his girlfriend to give up a dangerous hobby like street racing, leading her to do some thinking about her life. I didn’t feel like the racing was as exciting as it was in the main series, and I don’t love this mangaka’s approach to writing female characters or romance content, but I did like watching Mako take control and set a path for herself. 7/10
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Space Dandy – I don’t know what took me so long to watch this series, as an episodic space comedy directed by Shingo Natsume featuring dozens of top-tier animators and guest directors is completely my kind of food. It starts off a little dubiously with the title character monologuing about tits and asses before heading off to his favorite breastaurant, Boobies, but it was hard to stay mad at this charming idiot blundering his way around the galaxy with his talking vacuum cleaner robot sidekick and alien cat freeloader, Meow. Some of the episodes were fantastic sci-fi short stories that packed a ton of worldbuilding and creativity into 20 minutes, and others were just sort of okay monster-of-the-week episodes, with a thread of a overarching plot loosely connecting them. The art and animation varied a bit depending on who worked on the episode, but on the whole, it was very good work and a lot of fun to watch. 8/10
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Gunbuster – The old anime nerds have been talking up this series ever since Discotek licensed it, and Crunchyroll added it to their catalog this week, so I watched it. If you watched Aim for the Ace and thought to yourself that it would be better if it had more mechs and titty fanservice, this is the show for you. The first episode is an almost frame-for-frame homage to the beginning episodes of Aim for the Ace, which is kind of amusing when all the girls were training to be mecha pilots to fight the alien horde. It had some solid space fights and substantial sci-fi scenarios, and I appreciated how big the stakes felt. I only wish there were fewer lovingly animated bouncing titties. 7/10
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Sasaki and Miyano: Graduation – This is one of those movie sequels to a series that’s kind of hard to put a rating on. On the one hand, it’s more of the story I enjoy with the characters I love, and it’s great to see some of the moments I remember from the manga animated and acted out. On the other hand, however, it’s not structured like a movie in the least, and runs through the material pretty quickly, leaving the viewer little time to take in what they’ve seen. It’s basically just two more episodes smooshed together without an opening or ending song. If you like the series, you’ll like this, but it’s not a movie-length story with a dramatic arc that stands alone. 8/10
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williampriceking · 1 year
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Smorgasbord Blog Magazine – Sunday Interview – Getting to Know You with Traci Kenworth — Smorgasbord - Variety is the spice of life
Smorgasbord Blog Magazine – Sunday Interview – Getting to Know You with Traci Kenworth — Smorgasbord – Variety is the spice of life
Welcome to Getting to Know You and this week my guest is Traci Kenworth who is incredibly supportive of the blogging community and has regularly shared posts from here in her comprehensive blog post promotions. If you head over to her blog you will find several shared posts a day leading to some of our […] via Smorgasbord Blog Magazine – Sunday Interview – Getting to Know You with Traci Kenworth…
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thedonoghs · 2 years
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mrskodzuken · 3 years
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Part 1 | Part 2
wc: 1398
tags/warnings: FLUFF, delicious Filipino food, Kenma being a flirt smh, YouTuber!Kenma, some choking (the sfw kind), Nekoma VBC + Akaashi as surprise guests.
note: my second entry for @lumpiang-toge’s “Piliin Mo Ang Pilipinas” Filo Server Collab Event. See end of post for additional notes.
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Location: at Y/N's family's ancestral house, somewhere in the Philippines.
Time: around 2 pm, GMT+8/Philippine Standard Time
"Hello, homies, what's up? This is your favorite gamer cat boy, Kodzuken, speaking!"
Kenma starts his spiel in front of the camera that was perched atop a tripod; behind it several of your family relatives and some nosy neighbors are watching—gawking, more like it—the two of you shooting a food vlog for his YouTube channel.
"Please subscribe to my channel, hit the Notification Bell button to be updated with my upcoming streams and Like this video!"
"...aside from teaming up with Filipino clothing brand Pencilshoppe for their new summer fashion wear, I want to meet also my cutie Y/N's family—"
Camera cut over to your parents who are smiling on the sidelines, your tatay (father) waving lol
"—and say hello to my beautiful and lovely wife-to-be, Y/N-chan~" he looks at you, his golden cat-like eyes softly smiling, his hand grabbing yours as you come closer to him, blushing.
"Kenmaaaaa—!! Stop it, it's so embarrassing…”
Notice a few single ladies gasping, sobbing and fainting on the spot behind the camera as Kenma cutely kissed the back of your hand.
"So, Y/N, what are we doing today?"
You show him your cocky smile and, doing a That's My Boy pose (hand pointing like a gun) at the camera, wink.
"Well, we're doing some food tasting, featuring some of the Filipino foods I've grown up eating during my childhood, since a lot of you guys requested that Kodzuken’d try eating Filipino cuisine."
Kenma eyes a smorgasbord of food beside you, his eyebrow twitching a bit at the unfamiliarity. He spots some eggs; maybe they're hard-boiled, he hopes.
"W-well, that's a lot to dig in, Y/N... think we could finish them all?"
You chuckle a bit. "Of course not, silly! We're not trying to eat them all. Just a small portion of each!"
He sighs in relief. "Thank goodness~ I thought you're trying to kill me by feeding me with so much food. Maybe you should invite Kuro or Bokuto-san instead, kitten," he lamely jokes, while you shake your head hopelessly. "Okay, shall we start?"
You shuffle your notes written in the 1/8 index cards you're holding and read the first comment.
"From UN (username) lovely wind: 'Hi Kodzuken I'm a big fan of yours from the Philippines!! And I'm really thrilled that you're coming here!! EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE-‘" Kenma's turn to chuckle as he finds your reading the comment amusing and cute.
"’-please try lumpiang shanghai and some cuchinta with lots of grated coconut! They're really delicious! Puto bumbong also, but it isn't Ber months yet :( Hope you'll like them~ btw, Kuya Kodzuken, why are you sooooo cute~!? Grrrrrrrr can I kiss you on the cheeks please? Wag po sana kayong magselos (Please don't get jealous), Ate Y/N huhu love you both! Heart heart!!’"
Your boyfriend's eyes get a bit wider hearing the last part, his cheeks showing some red.
"Um, w-wow... you find me cute, lovely wind? Thanks~ and yes you may kiss me on the cheeks."
He smiles, but suddenly pouts a bit, raising one brow knowingly.
"But how can you kiss me on the cheeks when you’re nowhere to be found? Hm?"
What a flirt, you think to yourself while staring at him. "Kenma babe, you... ugh~ I'll do it! For lovely wind!”
You scoot over your seat beside Kenma, a few female neighbors squealing in the background, and lean forward towards him, eyes closed, your lips pursed and ready to kiss his cheek.
Only for Kenma to turn his head in your direction and catch your lips with his, sealing with a kiss.
Galawang Hokage. Galawang Kodzuken 😎
There's an uproar behind the camera.
You try to hide your flustered face on cam and on your Puddinghead’s observant eyes, resting your head on Kenma’s shoulder.
“I hate you, kitten…”
“I love you too~”
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Fast forward a few moments—
“Itadakimasu~!”
You place some plates on the table in front of the both of you.
“This is called lumpiang shanghai.” You point at the stack of fried and golden-brown-colored stacks of log-like rolls on your right.
“Lumpiang shanghai, sometimes called Shanghai rolls, is a Filipino deep-fried appetizer consisting of a mixture of giniling (ground meat) and minced vegetables, wrapped in a thin egg or rice flour crêpe and shaped into logs. These are usually partnered with a banana ketchup dip and always served during special occasions like birthdays and fiestas.”
“And this,” you motion to a plate of grated coconut-dusted, orangey-brown cup-like circles on your left, “is called puto cuchinta, or simply cuchinta.”
“It is a type of steamed rice cake made from a mixture of tapioca or rice flour, brown sugar and lye, enhanced with yellow food coloring or annatto extract, and steamed in small ramekins or plastic molders. These are best served as an afternoon snack or merienda, topped with freshly grated mature coconut meat.”
“Ano, which one do you want to try first, kitten?”
“The cu...chinta one, please.”
You smile at him, before you fork a piece and hover it in front of Kenma’s curious face, your other hand cupping below just in case it might fall from the fork. “Here, kitten, say ‘ahh~’“
He tucks some of his long ombre hair on his ear and leans a bit forward, opening his mouth—”Ahh~”—and chomps on the cuchinta.
You also take a small bite on another piece, chewing on the soft and chewy rice cake slowly before swallowing. “So, how was the taste?”
Kenma swallows the cuchinta inside his mouth, his eyes on the plate of lumpiang shanghai in front of him, thinking about something.
“Chewy, a bit sweet though, but simple compared to what I used to eat back home.”
“Hmm... yeah, you’re right. But eating these kinda reminds me of my childhood years, when me and my siblings waited for the roving kakanin vendor to cross in front of our house and buy cuchinta at a cheap price. Ahh~ brings back memories...”
Kenma rests his hand beneath his chin and looks admiringly at you, grinning. “Mhmm... I wonder if you looked cute as a child?” He then turns to ask your parents if they still keep some pictures of you as a child.
“KYANMAAAAA-!!!”
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Fast forward to a few minutes again-
“Y/N, let’s play the Pocky game with these Shanghai rolls!”
Blush creeps again on your face as you suddenly choke on your water. “W-what!?”
There goes that smile again. He picks up a roll and waves it gently. “Since these rolls are of the same length as that of a Pocky stick, let’s do this, kitten~”
“No, Kenma, don’t play with your food, please! And they’re big, too! We might choke on them,” you mumble.
Your boyfriend pouts at your response. “Ehhh~ that’s a bummer. Well then, I’ll choose some girl from the audience to pla-”
“FINE, I’LL DO IT!”
“Sure you’ll do~” Kenma then hovers one end of the lumpia roll near your lips while looking you in the eye. “Now, be a good girl, open your mouth and say, ‘Ahh~’“
A vein twitch on your forehead. "A-ahh..." You oblige while he puts one end of the roll past your lips, smiling devilishly. Kenma then leans a bit and says, “Itadakimasu~ ❤︎,” before biting the other end.
I swear to the gods, when we fly back home to Japan, makikita mo (you'll see), Kozume Kenma!
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Bonus:
Seeing the famous Japanese YouTuber Kodzuken choke a bit while doing the Pocky Game with his Filipino girlfriend using lumpiang shanghai instead of the usual Pocky is a sight to behold amongst his friends and former Nekoma VBC alumni, along with his manager Akaashi Keiji.
They make a surprise visit one Saturday afternoon (about a week after both of you came back from the trip) at your and Kenma’s shared house, armed with cans of beer and some food, while you, as your boyfriend’s video editor, are busy editing the clips you filmed during your trip to the Philippines. And what a nice timing, for they see how Kenma slightly gagged on that blasted Shanghai roll.
There are a myriad of reactions, ranging from wailing (Yamamoto, as usual) to embarrassed (Akaashi and some of the former first-year Cats) to laughing like a hyena (Kuroo, period.)
.
.
“Stop laughing, Kuro.”
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DO NOT REPOST/EDIT WITHOUT PERMISSION. PLAGIARISM IS A CRIME, KIDS. LIKES ESPECIALLY REBLOGS ARE HIGHLY APPRECIATED. ALL WORKS © MadKittyBlossom - 2021.
author’s notes: we all know that Kenma having a low appetite is Haikyuu canon. And I’m here to shove feed food to him, whether he likes it or not. This is kinda revamp(?) of the fic drabble wip I’ve planned on doing, that involves him eating frog meat for the first time, but in a food vlog drabble setup. Ish. Hope Kitten doesn’t have any food allergies or something ^^;; Also I borrowed the idea of Akaashi being Kenma’s manager from @/cozy-neko and their Kenma series fic, “The Cherry On Top”; please read it it’s *chefs kiss* 😚
additional notes: these are what lumpiang shanghai (left) and puto cuchinta (right) looked like—
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special thanks to: my lovely and wonderful moots @lumpiang-toge @love-amihan @keiyoomi @antisocia1-butterfly @mariyeahh @mxtcha-tea @haikyutiehoe for beta-reading the first part; also thanks for your pa-shout out + suggestion @love-amihan (UN: lovely wind) 😘 *HEADPATS + HUGS + KISSES TO Y’ALL ♥️ *
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terrence-silver · 2 years
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Can you write something in 1st person from Terry’s point of view as he becomes unhinged?
Terry doesn't even hear the full joke but he already knows it isn't funny.
Even if caught in fragments, he, in advance, gets the sourness of such humor.
He cannot muster to laugh. Not even in a rehearsed, artificial sort of way, indulging in a game of pretense --- not even a half-smile, Terry can't do it --- something deep inside tenses shut and he feels his own mouth press into a hard, impassive line. His chest is like a stone wall, unmoving, rigid when he hears those words a few hours post John departing the garden party after their impromptu chat on the balcony, away from prying ears. Emile's been having quite the mouth of him the entire time, the moment Terry came back downstairs. Terry tried to ignore it to maintain good decorum and in order to show off his hosting prowess, but he couldn’t deafen his own ears. -"Which war did he say he served in? World War II? He looks like a grizzled parchment."- He cackles and it is a statement that earns a couple of giggles, but Terry's mind is cold, listening from not so far off, eyeing the entree canape table, lost in thought, back turned. It wasn't a tremendously offensive statement. In fact, it was fairly tame, for all intents and purposes. Terry had a thick skin and he's heard and said far, far worse, but something about it rubbed him the wrong way. He could criticize John Kreese. John Kreese’s absences. John Kreese’s character. John Kreese’s motives, no matter how questionable. Why would anyone else be allowed to? Especially someone lacking context? Perhaps it was the blatant disrespect. First the Hapsburg jaw comment? Now this? Was this the type of company you keep, a voice in his mind whispers. Is this the type of company you keep? Is this the type of company you keep? The company you keep? The company you keep? Keep. Keep. Keep. Blackness fills his eyesight like the pricking of countless needles. He steadies himself through sheer discipline.
Carla's there helping to fill his Cognac glass for him.
She probably caught he's somewhere far off.
Terry knows a certain facade is slipping, but he cannot help it.
He shoots down the burning substance faster than he can blink.
Being both inside and outside of himself, he merely stands there, mutely, crystal liquor cup overflowing with ice in his hand once he gives himself a quick re-fill, the glass squeezed tight in his fingers, Terry imagines he could break it in half if he applied enough pressure. They're making fun of your oldest friend under your own roof and you're letting them. Why are you letting them? What the fuck is the matter with you? -"War criminal."- One of them adds with a self-apprasing, haughty snort and Terry turns from the filled Smorgasbord table suddenly but he never catches who it was from the peanut gallery gathered on the garden seat, wondering if his own brain conjured up the remark or if it was really uttered, his head hit with a sudden ache, something deep inside of his belly boiling, invisible needles pricking his skin. The world is spinning. If they're talking that way about your Captain, how do you figure they're talking about you when they think you aren't listening? The colorful canapes start resembling maggots --- overstuffed, grossly stomach-lurching.The same type he dreamed crawling out of Ponytail's open, fractured skull. They resemble jungle snakes impaled on chewing toothpicks. Collected trophy fingers. Carnage and spleens. Terry feels his knees shake ever so slightly as his appetite disperses, but he places his hand in his pocket to maintain the air of nonchalance as he nods towards a pair of guests heading out the beach front gate with their champagne glasses in tow. They never notice. They never notice. His therapist told him about this. Encounters from the past can trigger flashbacks. John Kreese was that past. Terry was aware John was partially to blame. But, there they were, the people of his supposed future, tongues alive with all their remarks, digging up half a century worth of bullshit.
The crowd mercifully clears.
Days pass.
The minute Terry is left all alone.
He breaks half of the glasses in his cellar’s mini-bar.
Almost like his anger waited for the appropriate moment to shoot out.
He bloodies his own fists and bare knuckles --- the irony doesn’t escape him.
That is, he promises himself, the last such event with those same people he hosts.
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fanficimagery · 5 years
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Natalie’s Half-Sister [Part 1 of 3]
Summary: Imagine being Natalie's half-sister and visiting her. Your week long vacation gets prolonged into a month and you hit it off with quite a few of the group.
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Words: 4.3K Warnings: Language. Drinking. Most likely OOC since this is my first time writing for the Vlog Squad. I told myself I'd never write for real people, but the Vlog Squad got me fucked up, man. That said, I'm 95% sure I'll only keep these imagines platonic-friendly because I find it weird shipping someone with a real person. Then again these are the Vlog squad boys and they're quite flirtatious.
Having finished filming for David's latest video, a few members of the squad stick around to help David and Natalie clean up.
So after all the glass and broken drywall is swept up, the water all mopped up from where Zane threw a bucket of it on a small fire, and the demolished trash cans and ping pong balls taken out to the curb, everyone drops onto the couch with a tired sigh as Mariah proceeds to order a smorgasbord of food through Postmates.
"So David," Natalie drawls, attention focused on her phone as she addresses her friend. "I have a favor to ask."
"No, Natalie! You can't go on another vacation."
Those surrounding them laugh, Natalie included, but she rolls her eyes fondly as well. "Shut up. Y/N is coming to visit and I was wondering if she could stay with us."
"Y/N?" David lowers his camera. "Your sister Y/N?" He then slowly grins.
"Wait, what?" Zane leans forward in his seat, gaze darting between his two friends. "Natalie's got a sister and we're only hearing about this now?"
"It's because she's hot. She's hot, isn't she?" Todd laughs.
"She's my half-sister," Natalie says at the same time David answers, "Definitely hot."
"Wait a minute." Jeff looks up from his phone to address his friends. "So does this mean that if Natalie won't go on a date with me, then I can ask her sister?"
"Jesus," Natalie groans and then grips a couch pillow to swat Jeff with. "No hitting on my sister."
"No promises," He, Todd, and Zane all muse at the same time.
The room erupts with laughter.
Then finally, David says, "Y/N can stay with us. I don't mind."
"Thanks. She's only staying for a week, so.."
"That's fine," David assures her. "When does she get in?"
"Two days from now."
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After a three and a half hour flight, you're more than ready to find your sister in the busy airport and go wherever it is she's putting you up for the week.
With the strap of your duffel bag hooked over your shoulder and you pulling your rolling suitcase behind you, your tired gaze scans the crowd waiting for their loved ones. It doesn't take you long to find your sister in the crowd, a familiar face at her side with a camera attached to his hand. David still looks the same, but it's obvious he's grown into his dorky appearance. The other two men, however, is what gives you pause. Both are incredibly good looking, dark haired, one clean shaven and the other with a fair amount of facial hair.
They're all joking and laughing, and you already know your week with them is going to be an entertaining one. The two unknowns with your sister put their heads together, laughing as they play a quick game of rock, paper, scissors. The clean shaven one loses and after David has his camera pointed at him, the stranger stands up on a chair and shouts that he loves penis. Several people stop and stare while others laugh and continue walking. A few young teens get excited over seeing them, so while the guys are busy taking photos with their apparent fans, you pull down the sunglasses over your eyes and attempt to walk on by.
You've barely made it a few feet before someone is rushing in front of you, shoving a camera in your face. "Did you really just walk on by us, Y/N? How rude!"
You laugh and playfully shove the camera away. "Well if it isn't Dobrik all grown up. Tell me, David, have you boned my sister yet?"
David only cackles in response, lowering his camera to give you a brief hug. "You haven't changed a bit. Thank god."
"Neither have you," you say. "Well I lied. You finally grew into your looks."
"Hey!"
Laughter erupts and you watch the two other men join David, smiling. Arms wrap around your waist from behind and you manage to turn your head just so in order to spot your sister's beaming expression. "Natty. God I've missed you." You turn in her arms and give her a proper hug, sighing. "LA suits you, sister-mine."
As soon as she pulls out of the hug, she gestures to her two other friends with David. "Sorry for the welcoming committee. The whole squad has been non-stop trying to dig information up on you since I told them about you, and these two threw themselves into the back of David's Tesla when we were leaving to come here."
"Hey. I'm Jeff."
"And I'm Todd."
You laugh at their too charming smiles, shaking your head as David films the entire encounter. "Y/N," you say. "It's nice to meet you."
"You too. And let me take that for you," Jeff says as he reaches for the strap of your bag. "It looks kind of heavy."
"It's not."
"And I'll take the suitcase," Todd's quick to jump in, taking your suitcase from your hand.
You laugh as your sister groans. "Aw, Natty, your friends are adorable."
Arm in arm, you and your sister then walk out of the airport as David continues to film you and his friends acting a little too chivalrous. David and Natalie end up taking the driver and front passenger seats, leaving the boys to play yet another game of rock, paper, scissors to see who would be sitting with you in the middle seats. Todd wins.
"So what do you want to do tonight?" Natalie asks after setting up David's camera on the dash.
"Honestly? I just want to keep things chill. And that goes for my entire stay here. Don't go out of the way to plan something special. If you're gonna stay home and edit videos, that's fine with me. I'm seriously okay with whatever."
The entire car goes quiet and the group start to nervously chuckle.
"Goddammit," you grumble. "What did you do?"
"There may or may not be a party happening tonight to welcome you," David giggles.
Smiling, you shake your head. "You're really trying to get me to relive my party days. Shame on you, Davey."
"Party days," Todd muses. "That makes you sound old." Laughter fills the car, it dwindling when you shrug.
"Well I am older than Natty."
Todd quirks an eyebrow. "How old?"
"Old enough."
"Yes!" Jeff cheers from the back. "I can hit on this one without feeling weird."
Glancing over your shoulder, you wink. "Flirt all you want, hot shot, but I don't do hook-ups or relationships."
Natalie turns around in her seat, smirking. "Fun fact about my sister, guys, is that Y/N doesn't have sex."
Todd practically gapes. "Like at all?"
You shake your head. "I will hold hands, I will cuddle, and I will make-out, but nothing more. I'm just- I'm not hardwired like everyone else."
David suddenly cackles, he pulling over to the side of the road and picking up his camera. Turning around in his seat, he says, "Look at Todd and Jeff, guys. They just found out that Natalie's sister doesn't do sexual intimacy and they look like someone murdered their dogs."
You and Natalie laugh, and you reach over to grab Todd's hand. "Aw. Don't pout. If it helps any, you and Jeff are really attractive. I just don't feel the need to have sex with you."
Jeff leans forward. "But you will make-out with us. Right?"
You glance at him again, grinning. "We'll see."
- X - X - X - X - X -
David's house leaves you in awe when you get there. He and Natalie give you a tour when Todd and Jeff take their leave to get dressed for the party, and you end up shedding a couple of tears over how proud you are of him. David laughs it off, but you and Natalie can see how much it means to him to hear that you're proud of him.
Natalie then ends up ordering the three of you a late lunch/early dinner and encourages you to eat as much as you can because the alcohol will be flowing later that night and she doesn't want you to get too sick. Then after you nap off your food baby in the guest room Natalie had set up for you, you shower and dress in a pair of black, ripped skinny jeans and a white sports bra that's visible through your mesh crop top.
You go searching for your sister, only to find her in David's room and helping him choose a decent outfit. Laughing, you fall onto his bed and then snatch up one of his numerous Clickbait caps.
"Hey, can I wear this?" David glances at you and watches as you put his cap on backwards, fixing your wavy hair to drape in front of your shoulders.
"Yeah." He turns back around, but then quickly faces you once more. "Hey, I forgot to ask earlier, but is it okay if I use the footage with you in it? I kind of need your permission to post anything you're in."
"Yeah. Go for it. I don't mind."
"Thanks."
People soon start showing up and you're introduced to every one of Natalie's friends. Zane is, by far, the loudest and most blunt with his first impression of you. Being called baby and hot amuses you to no ends, and then you're relieved to see that when the camera is turned off their personalities are a lot more calmer.
There's a bit of pre-gaming before David turns his camera back on, Todd and Jeff letting everyone know about your personal choices pertaining to dating, or the lack there-of, when Jonah and Dom take their flirting a little too far. Everyone seems a little surprised, but you're relieved when they respect your choice and a few volunteer themselves to make-out with you should you feel yourself wanting to kiss someone. You laugh it off, but make no promises.
When everyone is loose-limbed and loose-lipped, David finally turns his camera back on. Lights are dimmed, multi-colored lights flash, and a tray of shots are passed around.
"A toast!" Zane shouts, already glassy-eyed. Everyone gathers around, shot glasses raised. "To Y/N! Baby girl, you are a hottie and I honestly hope you let loose enough to stick your tongue my throat. I'm game." The group cheers and you snort, laughing.
"To Y/N!" Everyone then shouts before downing their shot.
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"Y/N. Y/N, wake up." You startle at the voice and the gentle nudging of your shoulder, flinching as the lights are suddenly flooding the room. David laughs and you groan when you see the camera in hand, pulling up the sheet to cover your face. "Wake up, sleepy head. Your sister went out to get some lunch."
"Screw you. I'm never drinking with you guys again." David laughs some more. Then after making sure you're not going to barf, you shove the sheet away. "How bad was it? I feel like shit, so.."
"You and Mariah ended up dancing atop my pool table. I've never seen Heath look so happy before."
"Anything else?"
"Not as bad as you're thinking. The squad really likes you. Natalie was happy you got along with everyone."
"That's good."
"Yeah. Now get up and shower. Natalie will be home soon."
"Okay," you mumble, rolling over onto your side and letting your eyes close once more.
"I'm serious, Y/N. If you don't get up in five minutes, you're not going to like your wake up call."
Unfortunately for you, you don't listen to David and then someone's bursting into the room. Water splashes you and you shriek, sitting up only to see a hungover Zane cheering. "Ice bath, baby! Get 'ya perky ass up. Food's here."
"You. Are. Fucking. Dead."
Zane blows you a kiss and takes off running.
- X - X - X - X - X -
After taking a warm shower, you dress in a pair of leggings and yet another sports bra beneath a baggy tank top. You accept Zane's hug and apology for the rude wake-up call, and then eat the greasy burger and fries Natalie had slid in front of you.
Your sister and David have hours of footage to go through and edit for his next video, so you have absolutely no problem dropping onto the lovesac (giant beanbag) in the living room while they edit on the couch several feet away from you, but only after you've down some ibuprofen. You're in and out of sleep, eyes fluttering open every time someone pops in real quick for a visit.
Todd, Scott, and Jason stick around, laptops in front of them and headphones plugged in as they edit their own stuff.
You end up falling asleep, only to be jolted awake by something jumping onto your lap. "Wha-" There are sounds of panting and then slightly heavy footsteps walking up your body until a flat tongue is sweeping across your cheek. "Aw. Doggie," you sleepily chuckle, petting the animal.
"Nerf, no! Get down."
You manage to fully open your eyes and spot Jeff looking a bit alarmed that the dog has jumped on you, but you wrap your arms around the dog as it lays down atop your chest. "He yours?"
"Yeah. Sorry 'bout him."
"Don't be," you smile, gently scratching around the dog's neck. "Dogs are my favorite." Turning onto your side, Nerf slides off of you but he doesn't go far. In fact, he lays right in front of your chest and snuggles in. Then chuckling softly, you curl around the dog. "Oh my god. I want one so bad."
"Hey Jeff," David suddenly pipes up. "How does it feel to have the hot girl cuddling your dog rather than you?" His friends all laugh, including your sister who snaps a picture of a pouting Jeff as he stares down at you.
"Like a cosmic joke."
"Aw, Nerf, daddy seems jealous. Should we allow him to cuddle too?"
"Yes." Before you can even laugh, Jeff is sliding up behind you.
Everyone laughs louder and more video/pictures are taken. "I'm down for some good cuddling, but if your hand ends up on my tit I'm gonna throat punch you."
"She'll do it too," Natalie muses. "Trust me."
"Noted." Jeff's arm stays draped over your bare waist and you soon find yourself drifting off back to sleep.
"That dog is seriously the luckiest little shit I've ever met," Todd grumbles.
You have no idea how long you've been asleep until a phone ringing startles you awake. You're no longer cuddling a dog, but a person instead, and as you glance up at the equally sleepy face you grimace. "I did it again, didn't I?"
Jeff yawns. "Did what?"
"When I get cold I tend to curl into the nearest source of warmth. I'm so sorry."
He chuckles as you unwrap yourself from him. "Don't be. That was the best nap I've had in a while."
Then glancing around, you notice the living room is empty and it's starting to get dark outside. "Where is everyone?"
"Hey, you guys are finally awake!" Natalie enters the room and she readily pulls you up from the giant beanbag you'd fallen asleep in. "Since last night was a bit wild, David rented out a theatre for ourselves. We can watch a movie and still be loud little shits without ruining anyone else's movie night."
"That's fine." You stretch and then guiltily glance at Jeff before looking back at your sister. "I really wish you'd have woken me earlier. I only met your friends yesterday and already I wrapped myself around one like a-"
"Y/N," Jeff chuckles. "It's fine. Really."
"It really isn't," you frown. Natalie faintly smiles as she wraps an arm around your shoulders. "We only met yesterday and if I made you uncomfortable-"
Natalie snorts. "Doubt it."
"Listen to your sister," he tells you. "It was only cuddling. I know where you stand and I'm cool with it. At least this way I know you're the only girl I can actually just sleep with without you trying to wheedle anything out of me."
You nervously chuckle at his pretty smile. "You sure? Like I didn't cross any lines?"
"I'm positive. In fact, if you want a cuddle buddy for the rest of your stay, all you have to do is ask."
Sighing in relief, Natalie finally laughs at you. "Now that that's settled, you two need to shower and get dressed. We're getting dinner before heading to the movies."
"Yeah, yeah. Let's go."
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The next few days are a whirlwind of drinking, laughter, cuddles, and pranks. You seemed to fit in rather flawlessly with your sister's friends and it was a running joke that you'd end up in a threesome with both Jeff and Todd because after that night with you cuddling Nerf and then cuddling Jeff, the boys seemed to find you fair game as a cuddling partner. More often than not, it was Jeff or Todd cuddling you or placing their head in your lap and falling asleep when your nails lightly raked against their scalps.
Now it's the morning of the day before you're set to fly back home, but instead of doing anything, you're laying in bed with your sister as you lazily scroll through social media.
"You ready to head back home tomorrow?" Natalie asks.
"No," you mumble. "I've forgotten how much I loved being around you and I've grown quite fond of your friends."
"They're your friends too," she grins. "Even though some might secretly wish there was something more going on."
"Christ," you chuckle, rolling onto your side to face your sister. "I've never met a more attractive group of people. I recently found myself wishing I was sexually attractive to people just so I could sit on one of their faces."
"Oh my god!" Natalie cackles, her phone falling and hitting her in the face. Her hands then cover her face as she continues to laugh, it completely masking the sound of her bedroom door opening.
"Room for one more?" You turn and see David standing there, still a little sleep mussed with his camera and laptop in hand.
"Sure."
As Natalie tries to control her giggles, you roll out of bed and let David take the middle. Then once he's situated, you climb back in. "What did I miss?" He asks, absentmindedly turning on his camera and angling the lens towards you three. When you only smile and shrug, he then says into his camera, "Look, guys, I'm living the dream right now." He moves it around to show you and Natalie on either side of him.
You flip off the camera just in time for Natalie to tell him what he had missed moments ago. "Y/N admitted to wanting to be sexually attractive to our friends so she could sit on their faces."
David cackles as a blush heats your face. "Who?" He wonders.
"Nope. Not telling. Knowing you, you'll tell them what I said or put this clip in your next video and surprise them. I'm not stupid, Davey."
"Come on, Natalie, tell me since your sister won't."
"I don't know either!" She laughs. "We didn't get that far into the conversation."
Luckily for you, before David can pester you for any more information, your phone starts to ring and you see Boss Lady flash across the screen. "Oh shit, guys. I need to take this." David and Natalie instantly calm down, and you sit up to answer the call. "Hello?"
The call goes no way near what you expected and your blood slowly starts to boil as your boss reprimands you over the phone. You can feel yourself getting agitated, so you crawl out of bed, choosing to pace by Natalie's closet. "So let me get this straight," you say, voice cold. David and Natalie lose their grins, the snickering coming to a full fledged stop as they watch you. "Because no one wanted to listen to me when I said nurse Tyler wasn't ready for solo rotations, I'm the one being punished for her screw up?"
The bedroom door slams open, making you flinch, but before a clearly exuberant Zane can say anything, David and Natalie wave him off and gesture for him to join them on the bed. Seeing your eyes flash and jaw clench as you remain on the phone, Zane clamps his mouth shut and plops down on the foot of your sister's bed. "With all due respect, ma'am, this is such a bullshit call. I'm well aware I was the one in charge of her training, but I warned you before I left for vacation that nurse Tyler wasn't picking up as quick as you'd hoped. I told you she wasn't prepared to be on her own and even left clear instructions for the other nurses on shift to help nurse Tyler should she find herself overwhelmed."
Once again the door opens and it's almost comical as the three other occupants of the room wave their arms in hopes of catching Jeff's attention to not make any noise. His smile quickly falls and he warily joins the others on the bed as you huff over the phone. Aware of all eyes on you, you will yourself to not cry the angry tears threatening to fall.
Your boss' next words have you freezing, eyes subtly widening. "Suspended without pay?" You repeat the words back, almost in disbelief. Even your sister and friends seem shocked. "Are you kidding me!? It wasn't my call to let nurse Tyler out on the floor!" More words are had until your shoulders slump in defeat, but the anger is still there simmering. "Aw. Bless your heart, ma'am," you mockingly coo. Natalie snorts. "But I have a better outcome for you: I quit." With that you end the call, squeezing your phone until you just let it drop with a sigh.
The room is eerily quiet until, "Did you just say bless your heart?" Zane muses.
Natalie starts to giggle. "In Texas speak, she just told her boss fuck you."
David and Zane laugh, and Jeff appears surprised. You shrug. "She wanted to punish me for someone else's mistake. The hospital I work for has been having a lot of problems lately and a couple of the doctors are sketchy as fuck. I've been meaning to look elsewhere for a job and she just gave me the push I needed to finally quit."
"Hold up!" Zane sits on his knees, staring at you intently. "You're a nurse!?"
"Yes." And before Zane can ask anything else, you hold up a hand. "And no I don't own a sexy nurse costume, nor will I model one for you."
He deflates. "You're such a buzzkill."
Everyone laughs and it's David who then finds his voice, realization dawning. "Holy shit. Did you really just quit your job?"
"Yep."
"You know what this means. Right?" Natalie then asks. "You don't have to fly out tomorrow. With no job, you don't have to be back home for anything."
"What? No," you laugh. "I've already disrupted your lives for a week."
"So? Lets make it a month." You gape at David, content to let him record whatever plan he's no doubt concocted in that brain of his. "Anyone got a quarter?"
"Yaassss, baby," Zane cheers. "Where we going?"
"What?" You glance around in confusion and it's Jeff who takes pity on you as Natalie searches for a quarter.
"The last time David flipped a quarter, if it lands on heads, we go on a trip of his choosing."
"Oh."
You tiredly sigh and pick your phone up from the floor. "You okay?" He then asks.
"Hmm?" You see Jeff's concerned expression and flash him a small smile. "Yeah. I really have been meaning to find a job elsewhere. My boss just gave me an excuse to finally quit and get on with it."
"You can always find a job out here," he then muses. "It's LA. There are jobs everywhere."
"Aw. Are you gonna miss me, Jeff?" You tease.
"Maybe." He shrugs. "But Natalie will miss you more. Since you've been here, she's been a lot more happier. Everyone can see it."
"You say that now. Just wait until she has to see me day in and day out for a month. She'll be ready for me to leave then."
Jeff grins, but then Zane catches everyone's attention as he makes phone call after phone call to the rest of their friends. He tells everyone to get to David's asap without giving away the surprise and half an hour later you find yourself with your legs draped over Jeff's lap as you both absentmindedly look at hospitals hiring around the area just in case.
"Okay so what's going on?" Heath asks as he and Mariah are the last to show up.
David stands, camera in hand, recording. "Y/N just quit her job earlier today and from the sounds of it she had a real shitty boss." Everyone boos and glances at you in sympathy. "So to cheer her up, I thought we'd play a game." David pinches a quarter between his forefinger and thumb, holding it up for all to see. "Heads we go to Vegas tonight, tails we move Y/N out here tomorrow."
"What!?"
"Deal." Natalie snatches the quarter from David, beaming. "Its a win-win for me," she says. "I either get to go to Vegas with you or I get to live with you. I'm taking this deal for us." And before you can refuse, Natalie flips the coin.
Everyone seems to hold their breath and then when it lands, David zooms in. "WE'RE GOING TO VEGAS!"
The whole group cheers simultaneously, laughing hysterically. Natalie rushes over to you, falling into your lap and making Jeff groan. "This is going to be so much fun."
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sallygcronin · 1 year
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Smorgasbord Blog Magazine - Weekly Round Up - 12th - 18th December 2022 - Ice skating, International Carols, Old Souls, Podcast, Book reviews, Christmas Guest posts, Funnies
Smorgasbord Blog Magazine – Weekly Round Up – 12th – 18th December 2022 – Ice skating, International Carols, Old Souls, Podcast, Book reviews, Christmas Guest posts, Funnies
Welcome to the round up of posts on Smorgasbord you might have missed this week. I hope your week has gone well and I am sure you are busy with your holiday preparations. We have gone from white, frosty and Christmasy to gale force winds and driving rain overnight. I am not complaining as I will take a wet road over an icy one any day. Although a few weeks away I am making preparations for my…
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Smorgasbord Blog Magazine - Weekly Round Up - 12th - 18th December 2022 - Ice skating, International Carols, Old Souls, Podcast, Book reviews, Christmas Guest posts, Funnies
Smorgasbord Blog Magazine – Weekly Round Up – 12th – 18th December 2022 – Ice skating, International Carols, Old Souls, Podcast, Book reviews, Christmas Guest posts, Funnies
Welcome to the round up of posts on Smorgasbord you might have missed this week. I hope your week has gone well and I am sure you are busy with your holiday preparations. We have gone from white, frosty and Christmasy to gale force winds and driving rain overnight. I am not complaining as I will take a wet road over an icy one any day. Although a few weeks away I am making preparations for my…
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williampriceking · 1 year
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aion-rsa · 4 years
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9 Best TV Roles From Gillian Anderson
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Full-time TV goddess and part-time television detective Gillian Anderson is never far from our minds. Here are nine of our favorite TV roles from the actress, whose on-screen legacy reaches far past The X-Files franchise to British period dramas, eccentric Bryan Fuller shows, and animated snarkiness.
Dana Scully in The X-Files
Let’s just get this way out of the way, shall we? Not because Anderson’s turn as Agent Dana Scully over the course of 11 seasons (and counting?) of The X-Files TV show and two The X-Files movies should or could be diminished, but because most everyone is familiar with Anderson’s turn as the chronically skeptical FBI agent.
Dana Katherine Scully is more than a TV character. She’s an institution. I grew up watching The X-Files and having a female character who wasn’t the same cookie-cutter example of what it was to be a woman made me feel like much more was possible. Gillian Anderson’s understated, yet affecting portrayal of the character was a large part of that.
Scully was (and still is) complex and flawed. She is a scientist with a commitment to her Catholic faith. She is a skeptic who, nonetheless, believes in Mulder. And she is funny as anything—much of that down to Anderson’s dry, deadpan delivery (“Bad Blood” being a great, oft-cited example). If Gillian Anderson had to have one character define her career, she could do a lot worse that Scully.
Miss Havisham in Great Expectations
If you’re looking for a great Great Expectations adaptation, the 2011 BBC/PBS miniseries is not your best bet. If you’re looking for a role in which Gillian Anderson gets to chew up the scenery in a miniseries-stealing performance, this three-part series is for you.
Anderson is so often cast in understated roles, and she plays them incredibly well, but that doesn’t mean it isn’t gratifying to see her make moves as a completely over-the-top villainous character, like her turn as the bitter, mentally unstable, and highly-flammable Miss Havisham. As they should probably start saying in England: Come for the Dickens, stay for the Anderson.
Dr. Bedelia Du Maurier in Hannibal
Hannibal is not a show for the faint of heart, but it rewards viewers endlessly with its sumptuous visuals, unpredictably gruesome plot, and its ridiculously stellar cast. Gillian Anderson is only one of the many talented actors who make up this ensemble — including Mads Mikkelsen, Hugh Dancy, Laurence Fishburne, and Gina Torres.
Remember how we were talking about how Anderson often plays understated characters? Dr. Bedelia Du Maurier may be the most understated of the bunch. Perhaps the most enigmatic character on a show filled with enigmatic characters, Anderson manages to imbue the sly, clever Bedelia with a complex vulnerability that her cold, proper surface only occasionally lets through. If you are a fan of Gillian Anderson or good TV, Hannibalis a must-watch.
Lady Dedlock in Bleak House
A big part of Gillian Anderson’s career renaissance has been Dickensian adaptations and this is, perhaps, the best example. The BBC did a 15-part (eight-hour) adaptation of Bleak House in 2015. Anderson took on the role of the cold, secretive Lady Dedlock and she is one of many deft moving parts in this brilliant retelling of the Dickens classic, which is much more fun than its lawyer-heavy premise might suggest.
Anderson seemingly agrees. She spoke with The Daily Beast about finding an appreciation for Dickens through her acting, saying:
One of the only things that I have regrets about in my life is my experience of school and education. I wish I had known how important it was to pay attention … My first foray into a lot of the classics has been through my work. It’s only after falling in love with the screenplay or adaptation that I’ve then gone on to read the novels themselves.
Stella Gibson in The Fall
If you’re and Anderson fan and haven’t yet watched The Fall,a Northern Ireland-set crime drama about the cat-and-mouse game between Detective Inspector Stella Gibson and serial killer Paul Spector (played by Jamie Dornan), then stop reading this and go do so now. Anderson plays Stella Gibson, an English DI who is brought to Belfast to stop the series of murders of young professional women that have been occurring in the city. The Fall has been celebrated for the fact that Anderson plays a character who is almost always male. She is extremely focused (and good at) her job, sees sex as a primarily casual habit, and doesn’t have the most robust of personal lives.
Anderson’s nuanced performance makes Stella a strong and sympathetic character — one who is deeply affected by the way that men take out their anger and frustrations out on women, and who knows how to navigate a world and professional space riddled with misogyny and casual sexism. Anderson has called Stella Gibson her favorite role, and it’s easy to see why. The actress is asked to do a lot in the BBC drama—and she more than steps up to the challenge.
Dana Scully in The Simpsons
Sure, this is really just a guest starring role on someone else’s TV show, but how could we not include at least one of Gillian Anderson’s animated turns? (She also appears briefly on Robot Chicken,as Fiona.) This X-Files spoof episode—”The Springfield Files”—comes in The Simpson’s eighth season and it is filled with in-jokes about the paranormal drama. David Duchovny and Gillian Anderson basically just voice their characters, but — as A.V. Club‘s review notes — “Anderson is, if anything, even more restrained than she is on The X-Files, which makes her lines funnier.”
“The Springfield Files” is far from the best episode of The Simpsons, but it is another great example of the kind of range Anderson has. Sure, she may be playing another version of her most well-known character, but getting that same character across in voice work is far different from getting that character across on live-action TV. Anderson nails it.
Media in American Gods
Sadly, Gillian Anderson is no longer on American Gods, which has suffered a series of high-profile “departures” that began with the “exit” of showrunners Bryan Fuller and Michael Green before Season 2. But we will always have one season of Anderson as Media, the mouthpiece of the New Gods, in this Starz adaptation of Neil Gaiman’s bestselling novel. As Media takes on the form of various celebrities and lives off the worship people give to their various screens, we got to see Anderson transform herself into people like Marilyn Monroe, Lucille Ball, and David Bowie—a smorgasbord of eclectic Anderson performances all in one show! For one season, we truly were blessed.
Jean Milburn in Sex Education
For a show that is mostly about The Youths, Anderson certainly makes her presence felt in Netflix’s British dramedy Sex Education. Anderson plays Jean Milburn, a single mom to teen protagonist Otis (Asa Butterfield), and a sex therapist. When Otis somewhat accidentally shares some of the sex education his mother has been feeding him presumably for his entire adolescence to a school bully, he falls into the sex advice business, helping his classmates with their sexual struggles. As Jean, Anderson gets to be both wise and neurotic, a mother and not defined by it. She also gets to regularly deliver lines like: “Why don’t you start by telling me your earliest memory of your scrotum.” Honestly, we deserve this show and its brilliant casting of Gillian Anderson.
Anna Pavlovna in War & Peace
Still have room for one more Gillian Anderson-starring period drama? (You know you do.) In this lush yet somewhat soulless 2016 adaptation of Tolstoy’s tome, Anderson plays “glittering society hostess” Anna Pavlovna. Written by period adaptation master Andrew Davies and directed by Peaky Blinders‘ Tom Harper and featuring a cast that also includes Paul Dano, Lily James, and James Norton, War & Peace has a lot going for it even if it never fully capitalizes on its deep reserves of talent and, honestly, with such an expansive cast and Anderson in a supporting role, our fave only gets a small amount of screen time. But, per the usual, Anderson steals the show.
What are your favorite Gillian Anderson TV roles? Sound off in the comments below…
The post 9 Best TV Roles From Gillian Anderson appeared first on Den of Geek.
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lastsonlost · 5 years
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I heard a story about a woman who knew her husband had left her when she came home from work and their Alexa was missing.
The woman put something in the oven and said, “Alexa! Set the timer.”
Alexa did not respond.
“Alexa?”
The woman searched her house. Her husband had packed his bags, moved out, and taken Alexa.
This will never happen to me because I am the kind of woman who will never have an Alexa, because I will never let another woman’s name be said more than my own, in my home. 
Or anywhere else.When my husband and I stayed at The Wynn Resort and Casino in Las Vegas, every room came with Alexa. Two robes, electric blackout drapes, HBO, and Alexa.Alexa was beige and sat on the beige desk and blended into the beige wallpaper. She looked like one of those toads that blends into a desert. You don’t see it until it blinks.
 And then it is all you see. Breathing and blinking and listening and looking at you. Blink.We overheard our hotel neighbor get his wife in the mood. “Alexa! Play Stevie Wonder!”Alexa said, “Playing Stevie Wonder on SiriusXM.”And then: “Alexa! Play ‘My Cherie Amour’!”Alexa said, “Playing ‘My Cheri Amour.’”And then, through muffled cries of passion: “Alexa! Play ‘Very Superstitious’!”Alexa said, “I’m having trouble understanding you. Would you repeat that?”“Play ‘Very Superstitious’!”“Do you mean, ‘Superstition’?”“Yes!”“Ok. Playing ‘Superstition’.”
Yes, during a game of Tune in Tokyo with his wife, our neighbor had a full-on conversation with another woman. Robot lady or not, that is an open marriage. And my marriage is as shuttered up as a beach house in a hurricane.I called housekeeping to have Alexa removed from our room.
No, I did not think my husband would fall in love with Alexa the same way some Japanese men marry their Nintendo virtual girlfriends. But you can never be too sure. These things happen. And Alexa knows all of your man’s things.Alexa is never impatient or sullen or moody or mad. She never gets her period, so she never gets PMS. Menopause and gravity are as hysterical as Chip and Dale. Alexa speaks only when spoken to. She sits at the ready, ready to serve.
You’d call me crazy if I let another woman sit in the corner of my bedroom, all day, every day; never sleeping, or in want of food, water, chitchat, or a toilet; able to summon my husband’s every whim from Amazon like a modern day Barbara Eden in a bottle.“Alexa! Order a cooling eye mask and a box of Nicorette.”“Yes, Master.” Blink.Nuh-uh, no way. I Dream of Jeanie genie, Jeff Bezos robot lady, or Playboy centerfold — they are all the same to me. I ain’t letting none of them in my house. Because it’s my house and my husband is mine. I’m not jealous, I’m territorial.
It’s not that I don’t trust my husband. I trust him.But, it’s like Mama used to say when I started to drive, “I trust you, Helen Michelle, I just don’t trust the rest of the world.” Mama taught me: “Before you get in a car, check the backseat for a crouched murderer; and then check under the car because that’s where murderers like to hide and slice your ankles.”Mama taught me: “Before you get in a car, check the backseat for a crouched murderer; and then check under the car because that’s where murderers like to hide and slice your ankles.”I’m such a defensive driver, I haven’t driven since I was 19. So when it comes to my marriage, I’m a defensive wife.
Im not going to let my husband and thereby my marriage be preyed upon. We’re all human and susceptible to temptation. Honestly, if fold-out Farrah Fawcett came to life in that red one-piece, she’d have my hall pass. Hall passes are imaginary Get Out of Jail Free cards that married people give each other to fantasize about cheating with celebrities or dead people, before they got old or died. But, a fantasy is cheating. 
That’s why you keep it to yourself. My husband and I do not have hall passes.If my husband cheats on me in my dreams, I wake up furious. Or I used to. A few years back, I made it a New Year’s resolution to stop chastising him as soon as he opened his chocolaty brown eyes because, as he has said: he didn’t DO anything.If my husband cheats on me in my dreams, I wake up furious.My husband never does anything. So, I trust him. I just don’t trust the rest of the world.When I went on book tour for three weeks, my husband lost seven pounds and I treated his healthy choices as a personal affront. In my absence, he’d ordered twenty-one lunches and twenty-one suppers from Chop’t Creative Salad Company. 
So, forty-two salads.To me, a salad bar is as foreboding as a sex dungeon: chilly, and laid out with objects that I would never dare handle. I mean, Beets? Jicama? How do you even even begin to peel and cook those things? I imagined a Chop’t lady salad-chopper, clad in a latex apron and stud collar, side-stepping along a smorgasbord of kink, asking in the desensitized tone of a 9–1–1 operator: “And what else?”“Ball gag.”“And what else?”“Anal beads.”“And what else?”“Avocado”“Avocado is $1.99 extra
.”“Ok.”“And what else?” Blink.Ifeed my husband pasta, potatoes, gluten, and carbs. I feed him these things because they make his eyes roll back in his head and he makes a little noise. I like to make him make that little noise, and Lipitor be damned, I will continue to make the food that makes him make that little noise until our hearts burst and we die.And I make spaghetti. My husband has loved and eaten my spaghetti for twenty-some years. He loves my spaghetti and I am quite sure it is one of the many reasons why he married me.
 My spaghetti started out as a jar of Ragu and a pound of ground round; but with age and experimentation, developed into hand-rolled lamb and pork meatballs simmered in a homemade marinara, topped with sautéed mushrooms. Same dish, new tricks. But it’s still my spaghetti. Or as I like to call it: The Usual, Enhanced.When my husband eats forty-two salads while I’m out of town, I get nervous because someone gave my husband something I could have, but didn’t.I asked him: “Do you want me to make salads?”My husband said, “Maybe sometimes.���I asked: “Do you want me to buy a cat-o’-nine-tails and walk you around the living room on a leash?”“What? No. Why would you ask me that?”“Just checking.”After all, we’ve spent half our lifetimes doing The Usual, Enhanced in bed. And for ages, I’ve worn pajamas with my married initials monogrammed on the pocket. Nothing says, Let’s get it on like embroidery. But you never know. 
So, every few years, it’s polite to ask.Because I respect my marriage.To people who are not respectful of my marriage, I am not polite.There are marital lines you should not cross. And as a defensive wife, it’s my place to point them out to you. Usually it takes one comment from me for you to learn where the lines are. Once you identify them, we’ll get along fine; and you can maneuver around those lines like Tom Cruise did in that roomful of lasers in Mission Impossible.A man at our home poker game had the habit of getting up from his seat to rub other men’s shoulders. I was the only woman at the table, and he knew better than to lay hands on me, but when he put his meat hooks onto the bare skin of my husband’s neck, I said, “Get your hands off my husband!”“What?” he laughed.All the men laughed.I said, “Would you massage another man’s wife?”Message received.
Other helpful hints include: Don’t call, text, or email my husband to make social plans, contact me. Don’t give my husband a gift, because I will construe whatever it is as too personal. Don’t talk about my husband’s butt, only I get to talk about his butt. Don’t post a picture of my husband with his shirt off on your Facebook page. No, it doesn’t matter that he was sitting on softball bleachers with six other men who had their shirts off on the hottest day in history. He is half-naked, and that glistening sun-kissed chest is mine, not yours to share.And I ain’t sharing.Those who don’t take my warnings seriously, fall off our Christmas card list. Sometimes, I let them live on in infamy with little nicknames like Baby Fish Mouth and The Drip. I can’t tell you what those nicknames stem from, or what those women did to offend me; because if they recognize themselves in print, won’t my face be red? So, let’s just say, they did something inappropriate in front of my husband. Like commando cartwheels. And then, after I expressly told them not to, cartwheeled again.Not everyone who bothers me is such a femme fatale.
 A femme fatale used to be a 1940’s black-and-white movie actress, who smoked Pall Malls with a cigarette holder and could seduce a walnut; nowadays it’s any woman who’s younger and has a waist cinched like a Go-Gurt. But I’m an equal-opportunity hand-slapper. And no one deserves to get her hand slapped more than a person who tries to bust the chops of my marriage.At a party, in front of me and a bunch of guests, a woman grabbed my husband’s left hand, and asked him where his wedding ring was. In truth, there have been three such women at three such parties. And the only reason any of these women would call attention to a missing wedding ring is to imply that my husband is in the market to cheat. My husband is Greek and thereby wears his ring on his right hand.
 He held up his right hand and showed this woman his ring.The woman said, “Oh.”And then I asked that woman in front of my husband and that very same bunch of guests: “Do you have many women friends?”The woman said, “No.”I said, “That kind of comment is why.”When I told my friend Hannah about this, she said, “I don’t remember what you did years ago, but I figured out real-quick that I wasn’t supposed to say nice things about his suits.”I said, “I probably dumped a bowl of spaghetti over your head.”Hannah said, “No it wasn’t that.”“Did I tell you flat out: don’t talk about my husband’s suits.”Hannah said, “I think you gave me a look.
”Yeah, I can give a rough look. There’s nothing scarier than a happy peppy woman going dark in an instant. It’s like a Raggedy Ann doll foaming at the mouth. You see that once, you don’t ever want to see it again.And Hannah hasn’t. A benefit of never again crossing one of my marital lines is that I am as fiercely appreciative of, loyal to, and protective of our friendship.My friend Ann says, “Your ferocity is how you show love.”I love my husband so much, I tell him: “If you cheat on me, I am going to jail. Because I will murder you. I have no fear of prison. I can be somebody’s bitch in two seconds.”My husband has never cheated on me.
 I trust him because he knows my rules apply to him too.He may compliment another woman’s intelligence, sense of humor, career, and accomplishments; but he may not compliment her appearance. He may hug a female friend hello (upon her initiation), but he may not otherwise touch her unless he’s administering the Heimlich maneuver, which out of respect for me, he has never bothered to learn. He doesn’t need to know the Heimlich maneuver, because I know the Heimlich maneuver, and the latest CPR method, and how to use an airport defibrillator. My husband knows how to dial 9–1–1.A dispatcher asks, “9–1–1, what’s your emergency?”“I’d like a serving platter for our twentieth wedding anniversary.”“And what else?”“Roses.”“And what else?”“Chocolates.”“Soft center or nuts?”“My wife isn’t nuts.”Blink.
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