brainworms

fuck it, I shall be unhinged

SPOILERS BENEATH THE READMORE

but first

EVERYTHING CERTAINLY WAS NOT FINE AT ALL

Okay so ever since last August this bit of dialogue has been living rent free in the back of my head

That 'infect' line is pretty interesting considering we get a somewhat similar line in patch 6.4, when Jullus speaks to Zero on the nature of trust among mortals. Thancred also had a similar line, telling Zero to stick around the Warrior of Light and she'd learn the meaning of trust.

It also speaks (at least in my opinion) the sheer level of damage Athena's betrayal and his self-sundering inflicted on Lahabrea. This man got wrecked. He was in love, possibly high on fatherhood, is on the Convocation, enjoys a great deal of respect from his peers--and he is hurt so badly that he limits himself to feeling any and all emotions at a reserve. He prizes logic and cold hard facts. Talk about a fucking crash to the bottom!

And even with his self sundering, he still feels deeply! Call him out over his shutting out of Erichthonios and the man just stares at you like you fucking slapped him straight into the abyss. And when he rejoins himself--he's still that cold, hard, logical asshole of a man--still repressing his feelings.

Anyway. Brainworms. I'm playing with the idea (still gotta let patch things settle, get some proper sleep and the like), but fiddling with the idea that Lahabrea--or rather, Hephaistos was at odds with Junia, because like him, Junia was wildly passionate and worked more according to her feelings rather than accept and follow logical outcomes. Though when they did get along on matters it was actually frightening for all involved.

I'm disappointed that we didn't get any time with *our* Lahabrea--this version of him is post Panda and self-rejoined and *right* before the Final Days, but as I've got the feeling that Pandaemonium is a good-bye to the Ancients on a whole in terms of story (could be wrong but as of rn there seems to be no need for the WoL to go back to Elpis), this version of him is probably the best good-bye we'll be able to get. And honestly it might be better this way. Lahabrea was so unhinged at the end of it all that just sleeping in the Lifestream is probably the best medicine, if he hasn't moved onto being reborn yet.

Regarding anything with Riven--I'm now on the fence regarding the idea of Junia finding out about her future...soul-child, so to speak. I have two trains of thought--one where she did find out about Riven and the Final Days, and her assistance in securing Pandaemonium. Junia decides to protect Riven as best as she could by giving out that Riven was a familiar she created, giving her freedom to wander the world. She then gives Themis a cryptic clue regarding Pandaemonium and Riven's arrival, and finally, to make sure that she doesn't foul anything up, uses Kairos to wipe her memories and implant false ones.

The other line of thought was Venat. It's in line with Elidibus's explanation in Panda 2.0. Venat tells Junia that she encountered a strange being in her travels--one that reminded her greatly of her student. Junia is suspicious initially, even more so when she starts to get details of Riven's time in Elpis. Venat then 'admits' to her successor that she suspected the strange being was possibly a concept that had escaped and evolved on its own--and had decided to model itself after Junia and her actions. Junia accepts this--much to her brother Lucis' displeasure.

¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Either way, following Pandaemonium's stabilization, Lahabrea--who has been unable to cast out the memory of a gremlin that looked and sounded too much like a certain illogical and annoying co-worker--

(not to mention her combat skill eclipsed the most powerful of the Convocation)

Confronts Junia over Riven. Junia being Junia, effectively blocks and prevaricates on the matter. Surprisingly Lahabrea lets it drop. Yes he'd like to get his hands on the little gremlin for Science™️ but really, he did warn her away from Pandaemonium so alas.

Later on before the Final Days, he is privy to a comment Junia makes-- voicing her wish for a strong and caring daughter who could 'help the world'. This makes him stop and pause--was the little fiend Azem's daughter?

And then all the Very Bad Shit happens, Lahabrea loses his fucking mind, doesn't meet Riven again until the events of ARR and HW. By that time he's so far gone he doesn't remember the events of Pandaemonium and possibly doesn't until his soul hits the Lifestream.

"SHE WAS THE FUCKING 'FAMILIAR'?!"

Riven: *sneeze*

After recent events, I ended up going back to the beginning to check things, because my first reaction will always be "wtf, this is shit, why would you do this" and my second reaction will always be "okay maybe that was a bit much, maybe he's not THAT bad, maybe has a good reason-

Okay.. that doesn't rly mean anything, maybe she's just worried kaito found something he shouldn't-

Okay.. okay this looks, well maybe he's just leaving some recordings in case kaito found something he shouldn't! It's not like they can hide it forever! The room is part of the house! Kaito lives in the house-

Excuse me... What did .. what did you say...? Wha

What do you mean "designed"?

What??? What do you MEAN "designed to open after 8 years"???

I have been angry since April 12th and I've reached a point where I don't even know what to feel anymore I don't even know what to tell y'all.

Like, wow, omg, movie reveals. Other than family relations, the other thing isn't exactly anything new. We've all read Midnight Crow. We saw Kaitou Corbaeu. We've been in denial until finally reaching acceptance. For me at least. And then we spend a few years bargaining, bc surely there's a good reason kaitos not in the know. That kaito has to be KID. Surely there's a reason? Right?

Right???

At this point we don't even truly know if Jii is in the know and was acting as planned out by the parents or not. Or if he's just like kaito. Tricked, lied to, played for fools. At the very least ginzo doesn't know, so there's that. Not sure how much that would help kaito when he inevitably finds out. Because he will. The fact remains that it's quite suspicious that Jii just so happen to choose to don the KID outfit and become KID to draw out toichis murderers exactly 8 years after toichis death. EXACTLY the same amount of time that was set for that trap door portrait to open to kaito.

There's a lot of implications to think about

i can't believe there's still people out there who genuinely think Ochako would "kill Toga on sight" at this point

like, okay, there's the anime-only people who aren't aware of manga developments or are actively avoiding spoilers, and of course there's all the people who clearly stopped giving a shit ages ago (yet somehow still feel completely secure making blanket declarations about a franchise they no longer keep up with???)

but even then, and even if you're not a shipper or just don't like the characters-- how can anyone have ever believed that makes any sense ever? like we're not even talking self-defense apparently? just "on sight"? who do you think Ochako is, the Punisher in pink?

like i don't think i'm especially media literate myself, but-- how is it possible for people to be this bad at reading where a narrative is going?

because of course that's exactly what the Togachako plotline was leading up to, clearly the ultimate endpoint of developing Toga Himiko as a sympathetic villain important to Ochako's heroic actualization was a teenager unquestioningly enacting the extrajudicial murder of another teenager

that's exactly what MHA is all about, right? that's the sort of person Ochako is, the kind of hero that she wants to be? that's definitely good storytelling and not at all inane or grotesque? ugh

Okay, a good amount of time has passed, and after having seen this post by @weretiger-be-my-horse , I've been turning it over and over in my brain going absolutely feral over this concept. I need to expand upon my thoughts on this idea and all the evidence there is pointing towards it, whether that be actual tangible things, or purely strong vibes I have.

First of all, full disclaimer: I did not like the season 5 finale, and how it wrapped up the DoA arc. To say that I "disliked" it is putting it extremely lightly, in fact -- I absolutely hated it, and I am still, to a degree, in disbelief that I actually even watched those 24 minutes with my own two eyes, and that it somehow wasn't a complete fever dream. While I'm not going to go in long-winded detail into all the ways that I feel like the finale almost completely bastardized all of its featured characters and destroyed any and all buildup we've had going on in this arc for 50 some chapters now, because that's not the main point of this post, I will not make any attempt to hide the fact that the theory-crafting I'm about to pose here is partly influenced and prompted by how much I hated the finale, and how much I desperately hope that it will not end up being manga canon. Therefore, if you enjoyed the finale — and that's fine! — and don't want to read any negativity about it, then I would not recommend reading any further (I mean, you've probably already left by this point, which is fair lol), While obviously it's important that I be as objective and unbiased as possible when explaining my thoughts, some of my negative feelings about the writing will be a part of this analysis, even if this isn't going to be a full-blown rant. Just know that if you proceed.

With that out of the way, let me continue.

So. In the aforementioned post, the theory presented is that the anime may be operating on an alternate timeline, and that this will become evident once we read the upcoming October chapter, wherein things will go completely differently post-chapter 110 than they do in the final episode — probably for the worse, with the s5 finale intending to lull us into a false sense of security and make us assume that everything in the manga arc finale will wrap up as smoothly and consequence-freely(? lol) as it did in the anime one. It also suggests that the Fukuchi we see at the very end that sskk are fighting came from the manga timeline, where he won, and that he used the Book to jump to a timeline where he lost, the anime one, proven by the fact that this Fukuchi is wearing a mask with the same design on it as the mask Fukuchi is wearing on the chapter 110 DoA color spread/title page.

First of all, I want to note the fact that it's not just the mask design that's the same: the entire outfit is roughly more or less the same as well. It's not completely 1-to-1, because the anime can never fully match the intricacies of Harukawa's beautiful outfit designs, and the Fukuchi in this scene has the kimono half-off because of the... super saiyan mode he's in, but most all of the main pieces of clothing are there. Any small inaccuracies could also be attributed to the fact that Harukawa probably didn't have this finalized art ready back when this episode was being made, so the animators wouldn't have had the complete design to work off of. But in general, because it's all so similar, I think we can quite confidently say that the ending episode Fukuchi is meant to be the one from this manga art.

Also, people have pointed this out, but it's worth mentioning that the mask Asagiri wore at Anime Expo in July was referencing this Fukuchi. It's not a crucial detail, but it just proves more that Asagiri is a gigantic fucking troll, and that he clearly wanted to draw attention to this Fukuchi design. It's important. He describes the mask here as made in the motif of an ellipses inside a speech bubble... could that perhaps be referencing meta aspects, like the Book?

Next, I want to talk about the even bigger elephant in the room, which to me is the most damning and undeniable piece of evidence there is of the anime operating on a completely separate timeline from the manga:

This Fucking Hand™️

As we all know, in the anime, Fyodor injures his hand when the password input device blows up, and as we all know, this does not happen in the manga. In the last episode, Dazai claims that the final nail in the coffin of his impromptu plan to kill Fyodor relied on this hand injury: because Fyodor couldn't pilot his escape helicopter himself, he would ask one of his Meursault vampires to do it for him, unaware that Bram and thus this vampire was now on the ADA's side, and said vampire could kill him while his guard was down.

Ignoring how utterly stupid and contrived this plan is when you stop and think about it for more than two seconds, the fact of the matter is that something that initially seemed like nothing more than an odd but inconsequential anime original addition ended up snowballing into being the entire reason one of the big bads was brought down. If Fyodor hadn't hurt his hand, he wouldn't have needed another pilot, and so the traitor vampire wouldn't have had an opportunity to get near him and kill him without him expecting it even though said vampire was presumably with him as they were leaving Meursault, and was probably already a traitor by then, so there was plenty opportunity for him to still die. not to mention by Chuuya's hands at literally any time he wanted to, because Chuuya was coherent the whole time. Also there's absolutely no way Dazai could have known exactly what Ranpo would do, no matter how smart he is and how much he trusts him. idk it's fucking dumb, just roll with it. Therefore, putting aside all other variables for now, we can conclude that, on the most basic level, this signifies that no hand wound = no death.

And let me tell you, this hand wound bothers me. It really, really does. Because they focus on it a LOT — they go out of their way to draw attention to it MULTIPLE TIMES, from the moment it first happens to the end of the season. Fyodor even talks about it to himself, about Dazai being able to cause him tangible, visible, bodily harm, (something that, again, as far as we've seen, has never happened in the manga). Hell, even after Fyodor's death, they're still drawing attention to it, because his right arm is all of him that survives, and Dazai picks it up and gives it to Nikolai to do his hilarious sad little gay fondling of it played completely straight even though there's nothing straight going on here at all! It's like it's a big red flashing sign at all times going "you see this injured hand? This is important. Are you picking up that it's important? Are you taking note of it?" Why is that? Obviously, it serves to give us the lore crumbs about Fyodor and "that man", but that's hardly the main, much more glaring reason, as I've already mentioned.

Fyodor doesn't hurt his hand in the manga. Fyodor won't die here in the manga. I am so dead serious by this point about this, and it's not just simply the fact that this was absolutely not at all the time for him to die, or the fact that his hand is the reason for his death in the anime in and of itself, but how much EMPHASIS they place on this, and on the hand in general. What would be the point of adding something like this, if it's not meant to alert us to the fact that it has a major impact on how the story plays out? We all know Bones: they struggle to get right and include everything that's already there in the source material; they would never go out of their way to add something this noteworthy if there wasn't a very good reason for it, if it wasn't absolutely necessary. I've seen a few people bring up the fact that Fyodor gets shot in the shoulder by Sigma and that that could lead to the same outcome in the manga, but I disagree: although he has blood on his shoulder in the manga, it seems like the bullet just grazed the top of it, because his arm and hand appears completely functional afterwards (not hanging limp by his side or anything). But that doesn't even matter, because this isn't even about the semantics/logistics of how the hand wound caused Fyodor's death because again, it's a stupid outcome, or what could serve as a substitute in the manga — thematically, this is a textbook example of the butterfly effect. Countless parallel universes exist within this series, ones where even the most minute differences lead to a majorly different outcome: this just happens to be one of them. There's no reason to think it isn't, and there's no reason to not think that the anime wants us to clue into the fact that things only went as smoothly as they did on the Meursault side because of this wound; in other words, that things will go very differently in the manga thanks to the absence of said wound. They wouldn't have added it in the first place and put such clearly deliberate emphasis on it otherwise.

Things are going to happen very differently in the manga, at least when it comes to the Meursault crew (but then, if you assume that, you then naturally assume it all will be very different). This is the only conclusion one can come to with the presentation of this anime-only wound, combined with the fact that parallel universes are a very real thing in BSD.

I'm going to go on a bit of a tangent, so bear with me. I play a lot of visual novels, and although such concepts aren't really as original now as they were a while ago, some of my favorite and some of the very best VNs out there are the ones that break the fourth wall and make the visual novel branching route format directly intertwined with the story: you know, the ones where the characters go "if only I had done things differently, maybe everything would have turned out better...!" in a wink wink nudge nudge moment, and the ones where the characters are aware of the different timelines, even, or even have the ability to gain information from their selves in said alternate timelines to influence events in their current one (I'm intentionally not naming the games I'm thinking of for the sake of spoilers, but if you know, you know lmao). It gets very meta in this regard, and this is how I started viewing BSD through the lens of ever since I first learned about Beast: like a visual novel with many branching routes, and only a few routes that feel entirely "right".

When I first read Dazai's Entrance Exam, I was struck by how unnerving the ending sequence in the abandoned hospital felt. Obviously, Kunikida's internal struggle over Sasaki's actions and motives is him still desperately clinging to his ideal world that does not exist, but the specific type of phrases he uses — "who is wrong?" "[who is] the cause of all this?" "there has to be an ideal world" "there has to be something, I'm sure of it" "There must have been something we could have done!" — and the framing of the scene in general, is eerily reminiscent of a bad ending in a visual novel, to me. There's a haunting, looming, bleak sense that a different outcome could have been achieved, if different decisions had been made, or if things outside of anyone's control had been different... and we know that this is true, because in Beast alone, Kunikida never goes through the Azure Messenger incident, because Dazai doesn't have his entrance exam. Hell, you could even consider the anime's version of the Azure Messenger arc an alternate timeline in of itself, if you really wanted to, long before we even arrive at season 5.

When it comes to Beast, this timeline has almost the opposite feeling of what I described above, that I've also encountered in visual novels: the idea of a "good route" or "good ending" that still doesn't feel quite earned, or as perfect as one would expect. Beast is presented as the "ideal" timeline purely for one sole reason: Oda is alive. It is the only timeline where he's alive, and keeping Oda alive is the ultimate goal Dazai wants to achieve, the only reason this timeline exists; therefore, disregarding all else, Beast should be the best timeline, because Oda's death is the greatest devastation in the series to date. We all want him to live, so why wouldn't the timeline where he does be the best one? And yet... of course, it isn't. Dazai is alone, and steeped in darkness and loneliness without Oda, and dies by the end of the story for Oda's continued living. Atsushi has Kyouka still, but he's suffering and more traumatized, and unable to heal while stuck in the mafia, and neither can Kyouka. Akutagawa is living a much better life in the ADA... but without his sister, and without what he has from his bond with Atsushi in canon, that isn't replicated in Beast. And Oda... Oda is alive, and he has his children and his novel, but there is a feeling that he is aimless, that something in his life is missing. He has everything he ever wanted, but all that means nothing without what he truly needs: Dazai, and his time with Dazai and Ango at the bar. In this way, things going well and us getting what we want — in this case, Oda living — goes against how it's supposed to be, the natural order, which is why it feels so hollow. In the specific visual novel I'm thinking of here as a comparison (again, shoutout if you know), there's an alternate ending that involves you inputting information you gain at the end of the game very early on in the game, wherein the protagonist now has memories of the future and is able to bypass and prevent all of the events that take place normally. This means that people who die or are hurt somehow in general are saved from that fate, and nothing bad ever occurs; everything wraps up neatly and nicely... but again, there's an undeniable, unsettling feeling of emptiness, of a victory that rings hollow, because what's the point if everything is simply handed to you easily, where's the sense of accomplishment, without any struggles to achieve said victories, or any growth along the way? How can it feel earned if one doesn't have to, in Dazai's words, "scream within the storm of uncertainty, and run with flowing blood"?

You can probably already see where I'm going with this.

This finale feels weird. Really, really weird. It feels too cheap, too simple, too unsatisfying. So much so, in fact, that for almost the entire runtime, as I was bombarded with resolution upon resolution one after another, I kept thinking "There's no way this can be real. Where's the catch? When is the "gotcha!" moment gonna happen? The "it was all a dream" reveal?". And this isn't just because I hated the writing, and that it really did feel like a fever dream watching fanfic levels of bad (actually, that's an insult to fanfic writers, tbh; they could do better) — no, it genuinely feels so incredibly fake. Even upon rewatching it and already knowing what happens, my brain still naturally keeps expecting some kinda of "sike, you THOUGHT!" moment to suddenly appear. It just.... feels "too good to be true". Dazai and Chuuya come out unscathed, and it's revealed that they were never in any real danger to begin with. Fyodor, one of our biggest threats, is dealt with supposedly for good (I say "supposedly" only because of the Jesus line, but if anything imo, I think that's just a hint that this won't be the canon ending in the manga, so in a sense he's going to "come back to life"), and Nikolai seems somewhat at peace with his death. The other biggest threat, Fukuchi, is also dealt with, and he and Fukuzawa get their final moment together of closure. Yes, Sigma is left in Meursault don't even get me started on how angry this alone makes me, and Fukuzawa loses Fukuchi, but overall, everything is portrayed in a positive light, and any negatives or losses are quickly glossed over. Everything is tied up nicely, neatly, and smoothly. ...And that is exactly what makes it feel so wrong, and hard to trust in.

I'm not sure if this will make sense, but to me, the finale is so incredibly poorly written that it almost feels.... intentional. It's so bad to the point of feeling self-aware in how bad it is, how unrealistically happy and convenient an ending it is. It had to end this neatly in order to rush to wrap up this arc for the season finale and not leave the last episode on a cliffhanger — which imo is chiefly the main reason it turned out this way, and, if this whole theory is true, Asagiri just used it to his advantage — and I'm not saying this was probably an effect Bones had in mind intentionally, I'm sure they just threw shit at the wall and went with whatever stuck, maaaaybe with some suggestions/approval from Asagiri, but the result is that you have a conclusion that contradicts so much of what was set up before and goes against so many character arcs, making some characters so out of character and even regressing in their development Dazai. I'm talking about Dazai abandoning Sigma, because he would never; hashtag #NOTMYDAZAI. Also Nikolai, Nikolai for most of that is so ooc I can't even begin to describe it oh my god. Everyone is OOC to a degree though lmao, and opens so many plot holes, to the point that it's impossible not to watch all that and get the feeling that it is subtly saying to you "did you really think it could be this easy? It feels wrong, doesn't it? It doesn't feel satisfying. It feels unearned." I find it incredibly interesting and suspicious in particular that they confirmed multiple theories people had about soukoku in Meursault: that Chuuya slowed the elevator's fall so that Dazai wouldn't die from it, that Chuuya slowed down the bullet so that it only penetrated Dazai's skin and not his skull, and that the both of them used Fyodor's camera angle to their advantage because they knew he wouldn't be able to see certain things from his view. I'm not saying that Asagiri trawled BSD twitter and tumblr after those chapters dropped for the most popular theories before the final episode was made lmao, there was no time for that (imagine though lol—), but I do think it's highly likely that he already had in mind exactly what theories would be made about these parts (I mean, the evidence for the gun scene was all there), and that Dazai rattling them off in his long monologue to Fyodor at the end is essentially him speaking to the audience and going "yeah, that's what you would predict, right? Those are the clichés, after all", much like him suggesting earlier that he can maybe bring Chuuya back to himself with a few moving words and the power of friendship, and Fyodor using the split personalities trope to fool Sigma. We expect these tropes to be true. Of course we'd fall for them, as Fyodor tells Sigma, especially if the evidence is right there. But Asagiri himself has explicitly said that he likes doing the opposite of what people expect. And so just because people predicted correctly with the three things I mentioned in this timeline... doesn't mean they'll be true in the manga's. Things happened how we wanted and expected it to, and everything turned out happily. So we can relax now, right? Everything will work out just as easily in the manga, right? Or... is the reason most of this finale feels so fake and unsettling and unsatisfying because it's meant to lull us into a false sense of security before all our heroes lose in the manga? Because deep down, we don't want an ending that's this simple, because we'd rather have a conclusion where our characters have struggled more and grown more and come out the better for it, and we know it?

After rewatching the episode a lot, and watching some other videos, and doing a lot of thinking, I am pretty confident in suspecting that the only part of this finale that is actually from manga canon, aside from Aya jumping off the building of course, is Fyodor and Nikolai's exchange after Fyodor leaves Meursault — specifically, them talking about Fyodor leaving Sigma behind, and their "new game" and Nikolai being excited at the prospect of it. This little conversation actually feels in character for them, and it's easy to tell this when contrasting it with everything that happens immediately after, wherein Fyodor is fatally stabbed, and Nikolai, completely at odds with what he was just talking about, just... stands there and watches Fyodor die while Dazai monologues lmao. I'm not sure if the helicopter is still a factor, but I would bet good money on Fyolai getting out of Meursault being manga canon, and that Dazai and Chuuya getting out as well and killing Fyodor + everything with FukuFuku, is part of the anime original ending, in order to wrap up everything positively. It makes much more sense if you think about, in reality (aka in the manga), Dazai and Chuuya still being left behind in Meursault (where they can eventually try to get Sigma), because none of it was an act and things did not go according to plan, and Fukuchi having an entirely different goal that doesn't feel so stupid and contradictory to his character, and Fukuzawa possibly dying — everyone seemingly loses, with Aya still being the last hope, perhaps by awakening her ability like we all speculated.

There's a youtuber I watch who covers BSD in-depth, despite being an anime-only (she reads the respective manga content after each season, though). Going into this finale, she knew about the fact that the anime had overtaken the manga, though she didn't know where the cutoff point was; despite that, however, she made predictions about what was from the manga so far and what was anime original, and it was almost entirely spot-on, based mostly on what she basically described as "anime original dialogue." She talked about how you can always tell when dialogue is veering into the realm of anime-original, because the sentences are very short, choppy, and slightly out of character, but generic enough to not be TOO out of character, and so that anyone can easily write said lines, even if they're not extremely familiar with the character like the original author would be. And when I heard this explanation, everything clicked — because so much of this finale has dialogue like that. The Fyolai scenes just feel peppered with it, around the lines I mentioned earlier, the Dazai dialogue does too, and ESPECIALLY shit at the end like Fukuchi and Fukuzawa exchanging the cliche death lines to end all death lines: "Are you there? I'm a little tired." "Rest up." That just isn't Bungou Stray Dogs. That isn't Asagiri. BSD is cheesy at times, yes, but it isn't like this; it's smarter. The dialogue is smarter, the explanations/plot twists are smarter, Asagiri is smarter, and the aforementioned youtuber I watched agreed. She's a pretty casual fan of the series, so if even she could pick up on these things, I think it speaks volumes.

I mentioned this briefly earlier, but this theory makes sense if you consider that this situation probably came about because of Bones wanting two seasons back-to-back when they did, and this arc being as long as it is. Season 3 aired in 2019, and I imagine Bones would have wanted season 4 in 2020, and might have then been willing to wait a bit longer for season 5 in order for more of this arc's manga chapters to come out — but then covid happened. Because of that, season 4 was delayed to 2023, creating the longest gap we've had between seasons, and I wouldn't at all be surprised if the delay made them want season 5 right together with it, after getting so far "behind", so to speak. S4 was announced in November of 2021, and roughly around that time, Asagiri was finishing up writing the plot of the DoA arc. If Bones came to him sometime in late 2021 and said they wanted two seasons now (so basically, one giant two cour season), Asagiri would know that not only of course would this arc not be finished publishing in the manga for a very long time yet, but that roughly 20ish episodes would not be enough to cover it all to the end, with this arc being longer than any arc the anime has adapted to date. Because of all this, and the arc manga chapters being nowhere near fully drawn to completion, he'd have to make a decision about what to do, and what to give Bones. Without ending season 5 on a massive cliffhanger that wouldn't be resolved for years until an eventual season 6, the only other option would be to rush towards an anime-original ending for the DoA arc.... and for Asagiri to take advantage of that, and integrate it into BSD's lore. Thereby creating a truly unique cross-media experience that utilizes the different mediums to create multiple timelines, that could make both the anime and manga interact with each other and become part of a bigger picture (not that you'd need to see both to get the full experience, mind you, just that it'd provide a little bonus if you did).... and would without a doubt be Asagiri's biggest surprise yet.

...I feel like at this point I'm starting to ramble, and my evidence become more and more incoherent and less substantial lmao, so I should probably end this post. 💀 Thank you if you've read this far, and hopefully it made some semblance of sense, despite not being structured very well; I know I promised at the start to try to be as objective as possible and curb my negative feelings, but I'm not sure how well I succeeded in that regard. If it weren't for the Fukuchi thing and the Fyodor hand thing, I probably wouldn't take how wrong and strange and bad the finale feels to me as serious evidence about it being an alternate timeline, especially since I seem to be one of the only people who actually hates all of it.... but combined with everything else, I am just so convinced of this theory being true. It started off as pure copium, but as more time has gone on, I fully, 100% believe in my bones (ha) that there is no way that finale is the same Bungou Stray Dogs I know and love, for so many reasons. It just isn't. It can't be. I know BSD better than this, I know Asagiri better than this, and I know that it's absolutely in the realm of possibility for him to cook up this whole scheme to completely blindside us with in the upcoming chapters, because that's exactly the kind of shit Mr. "Please Be Surprised!" himself would pull. If I end up being completely wrong, I guess I'm wrong, and you can laugh at me all you want then.... but I just know that ages ago people were teasing the idea of the anime operating on a different timeline from the manga, and I truly do think that only now are we finally seeing that idea come to fruition, as a setup for Asagiri going full-bore insanity with the Book in the upcoming arc(s). if I and the OP of that theory end up right, this will be the wildest time in the BSD fandom's history.

Like. I cannot even emphasize how hard they are trolling us at this point. Something is going on. Something is being cooked over there, the likes of which we've never seen before... and I don't think any of us are ready for it.

Oh yeah, and one last thing of note: both Fyodor and Nikolai here have their right arms hidden from view. Is that alluding to anything? I'm not sure. I also think that since chapter 110 was so short, next chapter will likely be 110.5 instead of 111, and if that's the case, this title spread could still technically be associated with the next chapter... wherein we might see this Fukuchi, who ends up wreaking havoc, right before he jumps to the timeline in the anime, as we see him at the end of the s5 finale.

I guess we'll find out on Tuesday.

ive been on twitter too much, this is true, but im actually really tired of "tony fumbled jade" cuz i feel like ive been seeing more of it lately—yeah no this is a twitter thing but i refuse to tweet now. but my point is that like. no he didn't. she was always gonna go to wwe. she wanted to go to wwe, they fucked up and said no, she went to aew, did the work, made herself one of the biggest names in wrestling and proved that they were idiots, and now they want her. like. there's pros and cons to both, obvs, and as of now, wwe has more connections for bigger outside of wrestling opportunities. clearly she doesn't need the money, cuz we know tk is willing to outbid wwe. it wasn't a fumble, she was always gonna leave.

moral of the story: i should stay off twitter cuz i feel like we here mostly get it by now cuz we talk to each other more and our disc course is different. but still.

I could talk for years about my keefitz thing. Like. Their friendship fell away so fast. I don’t think it was because of Sophie.

I think keefe was falling into heteronormativity. He has to marry a woman, and he has to have a child. He has no choice in the matter. He never had a choice.

I think he was in love with Fitz. Has been all along. I think his love for Sophie was mostly projection, seeing as she was more of a savior to him than a person. He thought of her as what the ideal wife should be. Who he Should be with.

he figures out he’s in love with Fitz at some point. Around the time their friendship starts shattering, he tells Fitz that he loves him. Fitz does not react well, as he was also raised under the heteronormative elven culture.

So keefe lost his best friend. And all he had left was Sophie.

hi followers. this dave is a dave who has mostly lived on discord and maybe thats y i didnt clarify earlier what my plans with him are BUT

if you recall hussie stated a long fucking time ago that bro basically tried to turn dave into a mini-bro bc of his own ego. this dave is kind of like if bro more or less succeeded with that. if thats not something youre into then,,,,,,,, sorry. i guess :')

seeking the permission to be weak: on the themes of goro akechi’s arc

vulnerability, isolation versus connection, resentment, emotional immaturity, sunk cost fallacy, constructing and confronting oneself, and what it means to be acknowledged.

for context, these are my semi-connected thoughts after playing through the game’s seventh palace for the first time. it left me feeling like i'd been hit by a goddamn truck, and suddenly all these damn words erupted from me. haven't actually finished the game yet, but i needed to get these feelings off my chest before i could keep going LOL [late-game spoilers for persona 5]

the akechi confrontation in shido’s palace has earned its right to reside in my head rent-free forever. i mean, it’s mechanically brilliant. all i’m looking for was a place to SAVE like normal after a mini-boss; instead i am ambushed by a boy who, frankly, could’ve used someone to save him. which is to say, i enter this fight fuckin bedraggled because i haven’t even healed up from that last encounter. three of my current party members are under 100 hp, and only a third of joker’s sp remains. it’s looking kinda ugly.

and yet, even though akechi had all the preparation on his side and demonstrated three full phases of power… he still loses. purely on the basis that mechanically, joker has so many powerful abilities gained through his confidants and all of his phantom thief friends fighting by his side–friends who could tap in when the others were exhausted. it’s entirely because of those bonds between joker and his party that they could beat the sole, sad akechi.

i LOVE how thematically resonant that is. for all his talents that even the phantom thieves begrudgingly admire, akechi still comes up short. not because he himself is deficient, but because he has no one else to rely on once he’s given his all.

when it comes to the thieves, this is the sorest part for him. akechi mocks their friendship, calling them “pieces of shit… who lick each other’s wounds…!” but what he really resents is that they help each other when they’re weak. growing up, when he was scared and lacking, he had no comfort but himself. it kills him to see them supporting one another because deep down, he’s always longed for the permission to be weak, yet still looked after.

this resentment is especially interesting when you examine how much akechi’s circumstances reflect those of the phantom thieves. having your life turned upside down by masayoshi shido. enduring the superficial judgment of your peers. betrayed by your father figure and haunted by your mother's death. performing perfection and compliance at the expense of your ideals. believing you have no choice but to obey your dad's orders while holding out for any shred of remaining affection. even being orphaned and hiding yourself from the world, feeling as though you have no power to escape your pain on your own. akechi and each of the phantom thieves have all been victimized by cruel adults and ostracized by corrupt systems. society had deprived all of them of a place to belong. but only akechi remained disconnected from other people, and only akechi took irrevocable actions that anyone would rightfully revile.

yet despite what could reasonably be expected from anyone, the thieves still choose to sympathize and plead with him to join their cause, properly this time. even futaba and haru, who have both been most directly harmed by akechi’s actions, try to acknowledge him and the isolation he’s felt all his life. it’s kindness he may not even deserve. but maybe it’s because, within akechi, they catch a glimpse of a much lonelier path that they might’ve stumbled down if it weren’t for their fellow outcasts… particularly joker.

joker is the foil that slices deeply into akechi’s pride and sense of self. just look at what they share: their unjust treatment by adults, their insightfulness, their quick wits, their charm, their competitive drive, their metaverse powers, their thief personas. hell–they’re even the same height. but despite their common ground, joker is stronger than akechi. which forces akechi to admit that his counterpart might have something special that he lacks. there’s something missing from his life, a void he’s never been able to fill but others can. and though there are material ways in which joker was simply luckier than akechi, the most important thematic difference between them is the strength and number of joker's bonds–things that akechi never learned to nurture and thus could never rival.

so akechi hates him. he hates him because joker and his friends stoke his sense of inferiority. joker isn't an empty phony. joker became acknowledged and supported without sacrificing his justice–in fact because he upheld it. joker found a way out of the misery when he couldn't. maybe worst of all, akechi hates joker because joker could've changed the course of his entire life, if only they'd met a few years earlier.

which makes it ever more tragic that in the present, akechi refuses the thieves’ extraordinary kindness. perhaps he doesn’t believe their show of grace to be genuine, rankling under sympathy that he mistakes for pity; perhaps he cannot fathom being equals in a non-transactional relationship; perhaps he just no longer considers himself worthy after all the awful things he’s done. whatever it is, he rejects what’s possibly his last chance to desert his path of self-destruction and embrace the camaraderie that has always escaped him. he thinks them fools, believing they should just get rid of him, because that's the only thing you can do with people who get in the way, right? it’s in this manner that his inability to move past his pain condemns him yet again.

the thing is, despite the cruelty he inflicted on the world through his childish temper tantrum, it's hard not to mourn the fact that akechi got here largely because he didn’t know how to grow up. if love is a safe space to be vulnerable–to mess up and mature–then with so little of it in his life, no wonder he got stuck stewing in his lies and hatred. that’s why he ends up standing before you as a kid burdened by trauma and loneliness from a young age. a kid whose parental figures abandoned him to bounce from foster home to foster home. a kid given great power yet no one to steer him away from his bad choices. a kid manipulated and molded into a mentally unstable weapon. a kid who committed to a rotten path until he felt he could do nothing else but continue tearing down it. i mean, by then, who was gonna want the real him? who was gonna save him? who was even gonna help him?

by the time he could feel the regret sink in, it was already too late. if only he’d been given the necessary love and direction beforehand, if only he’d met joker and the phantom thieves sooner… his mistakes are still his to own, but no one stepped in to show him how to wield his powers responsibly, how to rely on others, or hell–just how to make friends. when left alone to fend for himself with hardly any resources, he doubled down with the cards he was dealt. how surprised can we be?

instead this “undesirable child” grew desperate to become someone others could rely on–someone so undeniably special that even a person with a blackened heart like shido would have to acknowledge him. with such demanding standards to toil under, he could never be anything less than perfect; he could never entrust his whole broken self to anyone.

ironically, while freezing everyone else out, he grew dependent on external validation. he sought academic honors because it was an “objective” measure of his worth. he sought fame because he craved even the most mercurial of affections. he sought shido’s praise, not just because he thought he could take revenge on him one day, but also because deep down, he was a wounded kid who just wanted love from the father who should’ve loved him from the start.

his life became ruled by an immature revenge fantasy, leading him down the most counterproductive path possible. he worked so hard to construct an ideal version of himself. yet inevitably, every trait of his that others came to envy, every trait that made him “special”–his academics, his celebrity, his charisma, his strength in the cognitive world–is utterly wasted on a man who would never appreciate any of it. like akechi, shido never trusted a soul either, and he never hesitated to crush a pawn whose utility was used up–even if it was his own son.

if only subconsciously, maybe akechi already understood some of these realities. but it isn't until he is confronted by shido's cognitive akechi that the full weight finally sets in. in that moment, filtered through the eyes of the man he hates most, he experiences a reflection: an akechi who is twisted by self-serving logic, who quite literally hates himself, who would mindlessly self-annihilate for shido in a heartbeat. now it's clear: in the process of seeking futile validation, akechi has thrown away his immense potential and, ultimately, his sense of self.

the truth is, akechi admitting that he ever needed or wanted teammates would be admitting that all the suffering he endured and all the blood he spilled–things he defined himself by for lack of anything else–weren’t necessary. it would be admitting that he didn't have to be a perfect prince. he was worthy of acceptance–weaknesses and all–this whole time. that's why, after all the time and energy he's squandered, he can't do it. not even in the face of the phantom thieves’ exceptional compassion.

maybe he could’ve admitted it earlier, if he had just found real friends or familial figures to accept him. he never should have had to be “special” to deserve love. nor did he have to be an honors student, nor an ace detective, nor shido’s puppet. he just had to be akechi.

he just had to open his heart to other people long enough to realize. he just had to put his faith in those who–against all odds and beyond all reasonable expectations–still wanted to save him. but he couldn’t. the myriad complexes guarding his heart wouldn't let him. so even at the very fucking end, although he helps them escape, akechi still closes himself off–metaphorically and physically–from the phantom thieves.

not all is lost, though. at last he makes a choice in defiance of the pathetic self who shaped his entire life around shido’s will. by claiming this agency, akechi may well have elected to destroy both versions of himself: the shadow self that shido cast and the real self that he finally asserted. yet with this pyrrhic action… at least he would die not as his father’s miserable puppet, but as his own person.

if that were the end of akechi's story, it might be bittersweet enough. but before slipping away, joker extends him one last kind gesture: a reminder of akechi’s promise. his promise–perhaps the epitome of how, despite insisting that he hated joker, akechi consciously and unconsciously offered so much of himself in joker's presence. with just a few words, joker recognizes everything akechi has shared with him. perhaps it's notable that there is no sympathy expressed. he just acknowledges who akechi is to him. a rival. a phantom thief. a friend.

finally, this is the unconditional acceptance akechi has been seeking all his goddamned life. and even if he can't comprehend why on earth joker would offer him this… for once, an unguarded smile slips onto his face.

Being a writer is weird.

Everything about today has started off badly <3 and I don’t see it improving very much

Ahh life’s getting to you right now Roo? I know the feeling, just gotta keep powering through it you know? I hope the stars align for you and everything falls into place. You can do it!🫶🏼

And double update! For lil ol’ me? Awe way to make a girl feel special. Hearing that just started off my day looking great. Hopefully it continues that way! I look forward to seeing how your story will unfold! 😊

Now I gotta finish getting ready for work. I hope you have a lovely day today Roo!

xoxo - Lumi<3

haha, it's been a fun old 2024 so far, but i'm nearly back on my feet. it's just taken me the last two months to escape a abusive and exploitative job with a boss that had complete control over my life, who still to this day can't understand why i left or how difficult he's made my life by not paying my wages lmfao. kpop fans think they're delusional but they have nothing on this dude. he also kicked me out of staff housing knowing i had nowhere to go, but i've been lucky that my new job introduced me to another girl who let me have her spare room. in a way the stars have already aligned and i'm nearly back writing at the same pace i was before the whole thing imploded but like. christ on a candlestick. when i said i need a rich kpop boyfriend to pay my rent i didn't mean because i live on someone's floor.

anyway my career and ability to make money have been on my mind now that i have the ability to budget again, so you really did prove i can make money from writing just at the critical moment. signs from god. i'm telling you.

playing the bpd game where i wonder if i'm overreacting (and probably splitting) or is it smth i should actually bring up ... this is the trenches fr

forcing myself to eat beef again to compensate for the new never ending blood loss and remembering why i hate cooking it. why is everyone so fucking obsessed with steak anyway

Mortifying ordeal of asking but does anyone wanna be niceys to me. Maybe send blorbo asks or something (if you're up to it ofc!)

*sits with my hands folded in my lap* well. i get why princess mononoke is so acclaimed now.