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#Prof. Beauregard
ind1c0lite · 2 years
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Gritting my teeth clenching my fist I cannot headcanon Celci as a lesbian I do this to every woman MCU character I see I can't dO TH A-
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faux-ee · 2 years
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crying so hard abt melville & hawthorne's semi-fictional love story
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rustychips · 2 years
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Dude your stuff is SERIOUSLY SO TALENTED DAMN If you’re taking requests, could you do some of those ISWM cursed images drawing things, except with the AHWM characters? (Mark’s characters, Prof. Beauregard, the Hermit, Ed, Warden, etc)
AaA thank you! These are genuinly so hilarious and enjoyable to do, apologies theres only like 4, I went a little overboard 💀 hope you enjoy these!
( click for better quality )
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Matt and Ro are Soul-Siblings, So. . .
Prof. Beauregard (my headcanon name for her is Ruby) is Mack’s sister.
Ruby is one of few people whom Mack genuinely respects/trusts. Before he went off with the colonists, Ruby sort of acted as Mack’s conscience as well as his friend.
Ruby did great things at university while Mack was training to be selected for the Invincible II’s crew.
Shortly after the Invincible II had finally made it to space, Ruby began experiencing the events of AHWM.
Due to standard time-travel-wormhole fuckery, Ruby and the Captain just so happen to wind up in the universe where Mack becomes a dictator.
They literally just appear in Mack’s throne room. Out of nowhere. 
It’s been quite a while since the siblings have seen one another, so Ruby and Mack have a quick staring contest. 
For a moment, you could hear a pin drop.
At first, Ruby feels happy. This is her brother–the guy who used to video-call every week and told her all about the stars and the ship and the rest of the crew. She’d been so anxious after their last chat. She’d missed him so much!
But then, the questions start running through Ruby’s head. Mack had shown her some parts of the Invincible II during one of their chats–and this definitely isn’t the Invincible II. . ? Shouldn’t Mack be in Cryosleep right now? He’d been wearing a blue jumpsuit the last time she’d seen him, so why was he in a different uniform now?
She slowly glances around the throne room. She sees the golden statues, the banners with that M logo, the Lil’ Cappy dog bed.
And then it clicks. Ruby may not have a complete idea of what’s going on, but she’s not an idiot. She knows that something Problematic™  has happened and that, unfortunately, her dear brother has played a part in it.
Mack is watching as Ruby puts the pieces together. His expression is growing more worried by the second.
Ruby glances at the Captain, softly asking for a little help understanding this.
The Captain looks over at Mack, who shakes his head and clasps his hands together, as if begging them to keep quiet. 
The Captain, decidedly, does not keep quiet.
Ruby gapes at their explanation. Then, her wide eyes narrow as she returns her attention to Mack, who is now frozen in place. 
She just marches right up to Mack, grabs him by the collar of his shirt, and yanks him down to face her. 
Mack is absolutely petrified. He’s stammering, trying to do some damage control, but Ruby isn’t having it.
Ruby rips into him. All the while the Captain is watching, feeling a bit awkward but also extremely gratified.
“What was the ONE THING you promised me you wouldn’t do?”
“. . .go all control-freak on my crewmates. . .”
“And what did you do?!”
“. . .went all control-freak on my crewmates. . .”
Sometime afterwards, the Captain opens a new wormhole, which Ruby leads a very mortified Mack into after them. Forget the paradox and how the Captain may or may not be an anomaly–right now, she’s dead-set on making sure Mack doesn’t become a tyrannical maniac like he apparently has before.
All the while Mack is just made to hang his head and look at his boots. He doesn’t argue against Ruby. He’s just sort of quiet through it all.
Don’t worry, though. Ruby will forgive him eventually.
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mike104 · 3 months
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charlie and the chocolate factory cast meme Cream the rabbit - charlie
Vanilla the rabbit - grandpa joe
Prof. googlebug (Frank conti) - willy wonka
Smiling critters (poppy playtime) - the oompa loompas
Kirby - augustus gloop
Penny bleats - verica salt
Maydine (Frank conti) - violet beauregarde
Generic purple protogen - mike teavee
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indic0lite · 4 years
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What a doll
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toasty-tart · 4 years
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Sometimes you just gotta *makes art for my own au/fanfiction*
I just love these three a lot.
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inkribbon796 · 4 years
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The Lost Ones Ch. 3
Chapter 3: The Underworld Prince of Egoton
Summary: Dark is sure of many things: a kid is a bad idea, they live dangerous lives. But Wilford disagrees.
A/N: So chapter 4-5 (6?) is coming out next week. These chapters are already beefy and the next couple of chapters which look like there might be three and not two look like they’re going to take more than a day or two to write. Sorry I had to break them up like this but there’s a natural time break so I divided them up here.
Chapters: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6
Dark didn’t actually take a horrendously long time to find Wilford. It was the last place he expected, and by then a significant portion of his anger had cooled.
After searching the radio station, the warehouses, and the cabin, Dark found Wil in the Manor, the baby in his lap. He was showing the baby a picture book on the floor of the master bedroom. There was a mess of baby formula on the floor, and the front of the kid’s light green onesie was already stained with milk.
He was reading The Very Hungry Caterpillar with a huge smile on his face, seemingly unaware that the baby was more interested in trying to eat the book instead of reading it.
But what paused Dark wasn’t the objectively adorable domestic sight in front of him, it was the wire frame crib that Dark had thought he’d hidden in the farthest reaches of the attic.
Dark’s red soul completely stilled in her anger, his blue soul was getting a bit fidgety, wanting his cane to twist and hold onto.
Wilford stuck his finger out of one of the strawberries and wiggled it on the babe’s nose, successfully stealing his attention back. The baby giggled and tried to grab at Wil’s finger, succeeding once.
“Oh look, you caught the caterpillar,” Wil smiled, sounding a little like the Colonel for a split second.
Dark stiffened, he knew William couldn’t come back, the man was as good as dead like the twins.
But that didn’t stop his red soul from thinking: he would have been a good father if given the chance.
Dark’s blue soul was agreeing with her.
But the Entity shook his head, trying to clear the mournful thoughts out of his mind. This child was not theirs and the police would hound them until they got it back.
“Wil,” Dark called out gently.
“Ahh, Dark,” Wilford smiled, as if their explosive argument had been completely forgotten. “So glad you arrived. “Junior and I were wondering when you’d get home.”
Dark came down to sit next to Wil, trying to find a clean spot of carpet, “Wil, whatever Anti said to you, he was lying.”
The baby had put one of the thick pages in his mouth and started chewing his gums on it. Letting out little cooing grunts.
“Look, I know we didn’t plan on it,” Wil smiled maniacally, “but he has your eyes. And the boy is wonderful.”
Dark took a steadying breath to calm his rage, immediately having to prop the baby up with his own aura when Wil didn’t notice the kid was about to lean over and slam on the ground. And when the kid grabbed at his aura, Dark felt like his aura was coming into contact with a part of itself. That maybe . . .
Dark violently shuddered trying to dislodge those thoughts from his mind, Dark could feel his red and blue souls starting to get attached. The baby had a mouthful of Dark’s aura in his mouth and Dark felt uncomfortable, like the world was spinning violently out of his control. He had a criminal empire to run, he and Wil didn’t have the time, patience, or personalities to raise a child. They would just—
“Hey, hey,” Wil urged gently, taking Dark’s face into his hands. “Look at me.”
The world mercifully started to focus on Wil, but the worries compounded still. “Wil, we need to return the child to their home.”
“Junior is home, and we can do this, you and I together can do anything,” Wil promised with that manic, overconfident gleam he was infamous for. Then he picked up the baby who was trying unsuccessfully to gnaw on Dark’s aura. “Look at him, isn’t he lovely?”
Dark did his best to try and look at the bright eyed happy baby with objectivity, but it was almost impossible when every part of his soul yearned for something. Something that he would take from someone else.
Letting out a long, tired sigh, Dark gave in, “Fine, if the boy belongs to you, you can keep it, if not you will give it back to Silver and I can be done with the whole mess.”
“That’s a bet we’ll win,” Wilford laughed with overconfidence. He stood up and tried to put the five month old on his shoulders. Dark was quicker and snatched him away, cradling him safely in his arms.
“Wil he’s barely old enough to hold his head up,” Dark growled. “It’s barely been a few hours and you’re already going to kill him.”
“Nonsense,” Wil huffed, gently taking the baby back. One hand cradling the back of his head and his arms steadying him in a protectively cradle. “He’s a sturdy boy.”
Then Wil brought his hands down before quickly bringing the baby back up. The boy let out a high pitched giggle.
Dark felt in that moment that if his heart wasn’t already dead it would have stopped.
“Stop that!” Dark demanded angrily.
“Eh, he’s fine,” Wil dismissed but held the babbling baby to his shoulder. The baby immediately drooling on him. “I wasn’t going to drop him.”
“I can’t have you shaking him either,” Dark demanded,
“Bah! I wasn’t,” Wil rolled his eyes, before looking uncomfortable. “Uh, Dark what did we name him? I seem to have forgotten.”
Dark felt the need to shake Wil, but he was still holding the baby, “We got him this afternoon, we don’t know his name.”
“That doesn’t seem right,” Wilford pulled the baby back and they both smiled at each other. “What’s your name, young man?”
“Beh!” The baby slapped Wil’s face.
“Beh?” Wil repeated and Dark massaged at his temples.
“Beh . . . Beeeh . . . Bill?” Wilford frowned. “No, Bill is short for Wil, we can’t have that. Darky, why’d we name him after me, that’s a terrible idea?”
A loud internal scream echoed in Dark’s mind, “The first one dying is you, Wil.”
“Hmm,” Wilford frowned, laughing when the baby reached for his mustache. “Well let’s see, Beh . . . Ehm?”
The baby let out a loud giggle, bapping Wil’s face again.
“Bim it is,” Wil announced triumphantly. “Well how do you like it Junior?”
Dark was absently kindly thinking about the insane amount of work they’d need to do for this child. The whole Manor would need to be childproofed . . . if that was even possible! There were suits of armor with swords in their hands, priceless works of art casually sitting the hallways, waiting to be broken. There were dead bodies in the forest and Dark had no time to prepare.
“I call weekdays,” Wil decided, out of the blue, jogging Dark from his own thoughts.
“What?” Dark asked.
“Yeah,” Wilford smiled. “You can have weekends and holidays.”
“Wil, we live in the same house,” Dark reminded. Something his heart straining at the idea of Wil just taking the kid and leaving him. Granted he wasn’t theirs and would be better off dumped at child services but his twin souls screamed at the idea.
“No, I meant to show Junior the ropes, bring him to the station, you can bring him to the office, that sort of thing,” Wil explained, an oblivious smile on his face.
Dark felt relief at first, but the idea of Wil leaving had already taken root at the core of Dark’s souls, and in time it would grow and fester like an insidious disease.
Instead of addressing it, confronting it, Dark buried the hurt, offended twinge in his souls and commented, “He’s not going to the station, he’s five months old, what’s he going to do? Lay there and chew on cables?”
“I’ll interview him,” Wil smiled. “The audience will love him, who wouldn’t?”
Dark grabbed Wil, “If he comes within sight of that couch, you will never see him in that studio again. He is not going to be interviewed, he is not playing your games, end of story!”
“Fine, fine,” Wil quickly promised, suddenly sounding fearful. “He’ll say in the green room.”
The Entity let him go, “Good enough.”
Dark let go, trying to clear his head. “Okay I’ll clean up, you go get Anti.”
“Why?” Wilford asked.
“I just need to ask him about what he did while he was with . . . Junior,” Dark evaded. “And he needs to be cleaned up.”
“Okay,” Wil sounded hesitant, but passed Bim to Dark, Dark feeling a thousand times calmer by getting Bim out of Wil’s arms. “Be right back.”
“Naturally,” Dark told him and he was already trying to puzzle how to do this. Wil watched them for a second before stepping through the Void.
The effect was instantaneous, Bim began screaming, crying out and reaching out for where Wil had been.
Dark groaned in anger, immediately taking the boy into the bathroom to clean him up. Bim struggled, and failed his arms and despite cradling him with his aura and trying to be careful, Dark wound up just as wet as Bim was. He used a small portal to try and steal a onesie from somewhere, the Void was lacking one for obvious reasons. He also had to wind up stealing a diaper and struggled to change Bim into his new clothes, the boy wound up screaming himself to sleep, and Dark laid him in the crib. Finally allowing him to start raking his aura around the carpet, trying to get the drying formula. It went easier than trying to use his aura to clean the baby, almost like his aura didn’t want to work properly around the boy.
The Void ripped open and Wil and Anti tumbled out, laughing.
“Quiet,” Dark hissed at them, but it was already too late, Bim started crying again.
Wil moved automatically, looking extremely repentant as he picked Bim up, “Oh, Junior, did I wake you?”
Bim was snuffling angrily, but quieted down now that Wil was holding him. Dark let out a sigh of relief as it quieted down. Now he could think again, he turned back to Anti who was smiling at the ceiling.
“Is that milk?” Anti chuckled as he pointed at the ceiling. Dark looked up to see a massive milk spot on the ceiling that he had missed.
“Wil?” Dark started, glared at Wil.
Wilford was smiling, trying to charm his way back into Dark’s good graces. “Yes, my sweet Darkling?”
“How did you get so much formula everywhere?” Dark demanded.
“Well I was supposed to shake the bottle before I gave it to him,” Wilford answered, as if that was obvious.
“What’dyah do ta get that much up there?” Anti smiled. “Did yah forget ta put the fookin’ nip on or somethin’?”
“Maybe,” Wilford looked away for a bit.
Anti just laughed, “How is this brat not already dead?”
“Alright,” Dark said, waving his aura in front of the glitch demon. “I can’t possibly understand why you chose to play games with an actual child, but the joke’s over, where’d it come from?”
“Really, Darky, I thought you were told all about the oranges and the muskrats,” Wil asked in confusion.
Dark took a long, pained sigh, closing his eyes.
Anti chuckled, “Oh there’s a story ta that ain’t there?”
“It was the worst trip to Vegas I’ve ever had, and Wil was supposed to be in London,” Dark groaned.
“What—?” Anti was too curious for his own good.
“If I tell you the blasted story, will you tell me where you got the kid?” Dark bargained.
“Only if yah don’t cheat me on the details,” Anti demanded, floating so he could put his hands up under his chin.
“In the eighties I was in a business meeting, with a bunch of entitled assholes. Wilford teleported in, covered in bog water, holding an overgrown rat in one hand. He proceeded to show me and a board room of businessmen the muskrat he’d found fucking an orange, and that image has been burned into my mind for the end of time.”
“That’s it?” Anti spat.
“You said I had to tell you the story, not that I had to tell it well,” Dark reminded smugly. “So, now it’s your turn.”
“Fine, I grabbed him from a couple lab coats, oh an’ he might not have his rabies shots,” Anti admitted.
“What?” Dark’s voice had almost no emotional intonation to it.
“Yeah,” Anti began to gloat. “Had a bunch of lab coats clone yah two clowns, an’ I took the end product out fer a spin on the town.”
“You,” Dark’s ringing started to pitch up as his words began to trail off with his own anger. “That’s why you stole my aura.”
“I figured they’d just kill each other but hey, congrats Father ‘a the Year,” Anti smiled.
Dark’s aura started to curl around Anti and he demanded, “Where is this lab then?”
It took several threats and a bit of a skirmish on the second floor before Anti took Dark to the lab. Wil not too far behind. Dark then proceeded to single out the head scientist: Professor Beauregard and shove her into a storage room with Wil and Bim while the Entity proceeded to go on a killing spree in the lab.
His reasoning: pettiness mostly. People had touched his and Wil’s aura, and Dark had to recollect. He found his aura near the end, cuddled in a little tube next to Wilford’s. Both the pieces of aura were a mere fraction of the size they’d been when Anti had first delivered them. Proximity had Dark’s aura changing from the mostly blue mass back to a dark grey.
With his own aura subsumed, he completed his “tour” of the facility and then returned Wil’s aura to him.
Walking into the storage room he saw Beauregard on the floor with Bim, happily playing with him while Wil saw next to them, blowing raspberries into Bim’s face.
She flinched when she saw Dark. “Uhh . . .”
“You have two choices,” Dark warned her. “You will take direct orders from me and become Bim’s above board doctor, and keep your mouth shut about what you’ve done here, or I paint the walls with your blood.”
Beauregard looked around him at the blood already outside the room and smiled, standing up with Bim, “Well it’s a pleasure doing business with you.”
Dark didn’t shake her hand, he carefully took Bim from her, his voice full of warning, “I don’t appreciate when things are taken from me, you were complicit in stealing my aura, consider him interest.”
“But he’s—” Beauregard looked heart broken, but was silenced by a sharp glare from Dark.
After a couple hours Bim’s new doctor had been relocated, Anti had gotten bored, and Dark had a huge stack of papers to go through while the area was being cleaned. Wil and the child in question were sitting with him in one of the only clean rooms in the labs.
Chilled from his rampant fury everything seemed too real. Hearing it from Anti was one thing, and Dark knew that Wil could get attached to a rock on the ground if it was shiny enough.
But these reports were . . .
He could walk into a court with these and win a custody case. Bim was biologically his. And Wil’s, but that was another can of worms.
Which meant that, there would be no parents to come looking for Bim.
Wilford was dead set on keeping him, and Dark could already feel his blue soul start to get attached. That surely we can’t let the heroes just walk off with him?
And Dark had to agree.
If no one was truly going to come for the child, then the only thing that could possibly stop Wil now was Dark.
“I like the name Bim,” Wilford decided, smiling.
Dark rolled his eyes, “Sure. Warfstache or Doom?”
“Trimmer,” Wilford grinned.
“That name has nothing to do with either of our families,” Dark reminded, looking up from the report he was reading.
“I know, it’s perfect,” Wilford passed Bim to Dark.
Papers were dropped but Bim was comfortably leaning on Dark’s shoulder.
With the knowledge that no one was coming to take Bim away, Dark could get a good look at the kid.
“Trimmer it is,” Dark agreed, thinking that maybe, at least for a while, it was good not to have the boy associated with either of them.
And when Dark would, later that night while both of them were sleeping in the Manor, have a fresh birth certificate in hand he would fill out the name they’d planned: Bim Trimmer. On the middle name line he started to write Wilford. He intended to, it would be easier to hide, but instead he spelled out: William.
There would be many sleepless nights to come in the Manor, even after Bim had grown out of his cranky toddler phase.
In the next few years it would become obvious to Dark that Bim inherited Wil’s energy and enthusiasm. But Dark found that, like he could with Wil, that energy was tolerable.
After all, Bim had Wil’s charm.
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ego-ipliers · 4 years
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Mermay day 8!
Today's everyone's favorite profesor Beauregard!!
Tomorrow is king time!
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Warden Murderslaughter/Prof. Beauregard is a hilarious ship (both platonically and romantically) to me merely because you look at them and think they have the "Angry Toll and Soft Smoll" dynamic or perhaps even vice versa, while in reality they're both simply on the opposite sides of the "Constantly Ready to Throw Down with Any and Everybody who Stands in their Way" spectrum.
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sparring-spirals · 2 years
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The Mighty Nein stirring confusion around Professor Widogast post-campaign is very good. Lovely. Wonderful. Adore those fics.
But, now, what I want more of is the equivalent "Expositor Lionett has some WEIRD ass friends and family".
I need "I saw Expositor Lionett's wife with her half orc captain friend in the market and they spent like 700 gold on a random crown? I don't even think it does anything special?" I need "I swear I saw Expositor Lionett's wife with some halfling in a field and they were???? eating rats????" I need "I saw Expositor Lionett and Professor Widogast walking around town with their hands in bread loaves." I need "My uncle told me that at the ambassador meeting someone who had been talking down to Expositor Lionett got attacked by a cloud of tiny hamster unicorns and she. Didn't even blink." I need "I heard someone tried to poison Expositor Lionett, and all she did was drink it, laugh, and say 'Let me get Caduceus to give you some brewing tips the next time you try to make foxglove tea'." I need "I saw Expositor Lionett shove one of Professor Widogast's one night stands so hard he kind of floated backwards six feet."
Like, in theory we've got TWO members of the M9 in public facing, relatively respectable positions! LET CHAOS REIGN. :D
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lesbian-beauyasha · 3 years
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yasha, down on the forest floor, dropping all the firewood she’s carrying in case beau needs to be caught: (softly) holy shit
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strawberryamanita · 4 years
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I'm posting this as an OP because I want it to show up in the tags
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@accidentallye-m-o @ghostcats-random-hubworld @lilacrosemary Wish granted!
---
So it's not like a "theory" or whatever, it's essentially just a headcanon that I'm using to cope. I was pretty quick to accept that Unus and Annus are gone, even though the grief is hitting me in small waves(you'd think that I'd be a bit more livid, considering how emotional I am, but surprisingly I'm a quiet griever in most situations); and one of the bigger reasons is that I know they don't have to be gone completely.
It's like I said in my eulogy: they're gone canonically, but Canon doesn't stop fandoms. There are plenty of canonically-dead characters that live on through fanart, fanfics, AUs and RPs; it's not like it's illegal to talk about a character who's gone from their story's timeline.
Furthermore, Unus Annus came partially from Mark's mind, and as we know the characters* don't fully die in the pocket-dimension they exist in. We've seen Wilford be fatally shot. Dark died twice. The Actor's whole origin story has to do with him experiencing multiple deaths, both on- and off-screen. Who's to say Unus and Annus aren't in the "Upside-Down" now, waxing poetic about death to anyone who will listen, coming up with wacky projects and daredevil stunts, and the like?
(AND who's to say that poor, sweet Eric Derekson fully died from that paragliding accident? Please, let me see him one more time, I miss that lil bugger--)
Death isn't about disappearing, not in that plane of existence. They just moved on somewhere else... at least for me.
*Unus being played by Ethan is irrelevant, because Detective Abe and Warden Murderslaughter are played by Mick, Prof. Beauregard is played by Rosanna, etc. It's also irrelevant that Unus was created by Ethan, because so was Heapass, and he also exists in Mark's little brain-world. The idea of owning characters is irrelevant, even though Mark established this world.
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iknwnofillers · 4 years
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beau : WHERE THE FCUK ARE YOU PROFFESSOR THADEUS stupid fcuking bird
prof thadeus : 
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thedgeofsleep · 4 years
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concept: celine x prof beauregard
they're opposites, celine believes in the mystic arts while beauregard is about everything science and technology but they love each other and support each other's hobbies. they also like to go ghost hunting together (and sometimes that ghost is actor mark but wyd) . also also height differences okay
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indic0lite · 4 years
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I was trying to sleep last night but I had a vision and I had to draw it-
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