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#My name is Skylar White yo
galoogamelady · 2 years
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Well, my name is Ethan Gombos, yo! *VINE BOOM* My employer is The Weezbugs, yo! *VINE BOOM* Uh-huh. *VINE BOOM* They told me everything. *VINE BOOM*
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laurentlemonke · 5 months
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Cringing Bad
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neilpissyrega · 1 year
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breaking bad fans are really funny to me because half the fandom are total idiots and the other side is very very silly like its incredibly hard to find a brba fan who enjoyed the show in its entirety without making any jokes about it and who likes analysing it
cuz one side is ‘Skylar is a massive bitch it was all her fault’ and ‘common Walter W’ and ‘kid named finger’ and ‘Walt you’ve been seeming kinda sus lately you sussy baka’ and ‘lol Flynn likes breakfast lol’
and the other is ‘Saul Goodman is my little malewife ^_^’ and ‘Jesse is transmasc’ and ‘Saul is a catboy’ and ‘lol Jesse and Walt had gay sex’ and they draw silly little comics about what would have happened if x did this instead of this and most of these fans HATE Walter (which is incredibly valid)
honestly I prefer the second side
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leonleonhart · 5 months
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white man jumpscare
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addisonnie · 1 year
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you, me, & mary-jane
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summary: dealer!ellie comes in clutch in more ways than one.
warnings: make-out sesh, cursing, terrible breaking bad references
a/n: surprise! another ellie fic because i refuse to do the schoolwork that i desperately need to finish! wooooooooo dealer ellie is yum. i actually kinda hate this! enjoy! oh god also listen to “meddle about” by chase atlantic while you read if you would like. ellie=chase atlantic okay bye
part 2 —> part 3
There are several things in life that you can live without. Weed is not one of them.
You’re huffing and borderline growling as you dig through various stash locations in your room. Closet, empty. Under the mattress, nothing but crumbs. In every single pants pocket? Zero. Zilch. Not one lush green nug was found.
What could be chalked up to a literal war cry left your lips as you sat on the floor with your head in your hands, “this is it. This is the end.”
Dina’s head poked up from the side of her bed, “what are you whining about down there?”
Leaning your head back onto the wall, you sent Dina a harsh glare, “you and Jesse smoked the last of it! And I’m flat broke, too!”
She sat up fully in her bed, eyes wide and crazy, “bitch! Don’t pin this on us! You said it was fine.”
“That was last night! This is today! Today I just want to smoke my silly little bowl and enjoy my silly little high.” You groan and knock your head against the wall a few times.
Fishing your phone from your back pocket, you open iMessage. Hopefully your plug isn’t busy right now. Last time you bought from him was in the parking lot of his youngest child’s soccer game. Maybe buying from a 40-something father of three isn’t always the best idea—at least he won’t rip you off?
Hey. You busy?
Tom usually responds right away. His clients doubled as his friends (you being his ex-babysitter) and he always loved to provide for them.
Who is this?
Well, that’s strange. Tom definitely has your number saved. And, Tom definitely knows who you are.
Don’t play, Tom. I want to buy!!!!
You watch the text bubbles pop up and disappear in the bottom corner of the screen a few times, showing that he’s typing out a response and deleting it over and over.
This is his wife. Don’t text this number again. He is married. And he does not sell what you want to “buy.”
You could really cry at this moment. Like, honestly and truly sob. A long huff leaves your lips and you knuckle at your eyes aggressively. Fucking bullshit. Tom’s wife was always kind of a bitch, to be fair. But you didn’t think she’d ever pull a Skylar White on you. What does a girl have to do to get some weed around here?
“Do you know any other dealers? I just got told off by Tom’s wife.” Dina laughed from her bed.
“My name is Skylar White, yo. My husband is Walter White, yo.” You couldn’t help but laugh, “that’s exactly what I was thinking!”
She sits up in her bed, hanging her tanned legs off the side, “here. I have mutual friends with this girl, think her name is Ellie? I heard she sells. Good prices too.”
Dina tosses her phone into your lap from where she sits and allows you to send the contact to yourself.
Hey. Is this Ellie?
———
Ellie takes a couple hours before responding.
It depends on who’s asking?
Your professor drones on about some random Shakespeare play and you can’t bring yourself to pay attention while you read over Ellie’s text.
Dina gave me your number, I heard you sell?
Man. I really hope you’re not a cop.
You chuckle at her text.
Not a cop. Twenty year old girl over here. I love One Direction.
That sounds like something an undercover cop would say.
Ellie made a good point. You scroll through your camera roll trying to find a recent selfie before landing on one you took a couple days ago. You’re clearly high in the picture, so maybe Ellie will take the hint.
Here. Proof. Not a cop :)
Pretty.
She sent her address in a separate text and informs you to meet her there around 7pm when she’s done with her night class. Your professor excuses the class and leaves the remainder of students to pack their things. 5pm. Usually you smoke before going to pick up. Clearly, that’s not an option today. What does one do while they wait if they have no weed?
———
Nothing. One does absolutely nothing if they have no weed.
You knock on Ellie’s front door and wait a few beats before stepping back from the doorway. The lock clicks before the dingy wooden door opens inward,
“Hey!”
Oh, damn. She is fine.
Her auburn hair is short and rests about an inch above her shoulders. It’s pulled slightly up into a bun and several short strands curl lightly along the nape of her neck.
“Hey! Ellie, right?”
She smiles, “that’s me.” The door is pulled open wider and she beckons you to come inside. A botanical tattoo swirls along her forearm and you find yourself staring at her awkwardly before you step into the house.
She tugs off her flannel and slings it over the back of a woven couch, leaving her in a fitted white tank top.
You suck in a breath, “how are you?”
How are you? Really? Who says that to a drug dealer?
She chuckles and slouches into the couch, patting the open spot beside her, “pretty good. How about you?”
“Honestly? I’m suffering.”
She laughs fully this time, “that bad, huh? Your dealer die or something?”
“God, I wish. His wife responded to my text and told me to fuck off, basically. That he doesn’t sell what I buy.” Ellie cringes and shakes her head, her lips pressed into a tight frown,
“she Skylar-Whited you? That’s pretty fucking rough.”
“That’s exactly what I said! Call me Jesse Pinkman, I guess.” Ellie shook her head again and leaned forward to grab a small mahogany box.
Her long fingers opened the lid and scrounged through the container before she happily hummed and held up what she was looking for. A joint was pressed between her fingers and she quickly snatched a lighter off the coffee table.
After she placed the box back on the table, she leaned back into the couch and stretched her arm along the back of it, her fingers barely grazing your shoulder. Ellie turned to face you and held the joint to your lips, “open up.”
Your face flushes as you do what she asked—demanded. Her fingers place the joint onto your awaiting lips and she quickly lights the paper, still holding the joint to your mouth.
What is this girl on? You can’t help but feel as if this is strangely intimate. Tom never held a joint to your lips! On second thought, it’s probably good that he didn’t.
You inhale and she pulls the joint to meet her own mouth as she watches you exhale.
“We can smoke this and then I’ll grind up some for you.” She passes you the joint this time.
“Oh—you don’t have to. I can take the nugs. I don’t want to trouble you.” You pass it back.
She smirks, the joint hanging from the side of her mouth, “no trouble at all. Happy to do it.”
“Is that what you tell all of your clients?”
Another smirk, “only the pretty ones.”
The joint is placed back into your fingertips and you are very glad, this way you can explain the extreme blush creeping up onto your cheeks as just you being overly high. Ellie has somehow moved closer to you, her thigh is pressed up against yours and the arm she has outstretched across the back of the couch skims the back of your shoulders. A chill rakes through your body, leaving goosebumps in its wake.
“Here, take it.” The hand she has resting behind your head snatches her discarded flannel and drops it into your lap.
“Oh—thanks.” She hums in response.
———
Ellis is funny as hell. Each sentence that escapes her plump lips makes less sense than the last,
“would you rather be trapped in a locked room with a gorilla, or with…with a shit ton of cockroaches?”
She’s sitting opposite you on the couch, her back leaning against one armrest. One of her legs is bent and squished against the back of the couch, her other is sprawled off the edge of the couch. Bit of a man-spreader, this one. Your back is pressed to the opposite arm rest and your legs are stretched outward, resting softly in her lap.
Again, weirdly intimate.
“Oh. Fuck, probably the roaches? Just step on ‘em. Yanno?”
She gasps and latches onto your sock-clad feet, “sickening! Me and that gorilla are gonna be friends.”
You squint at her, “you gonna sell him some Mary-Jane?”
“Yup,” she pops the ‘p’ and passes you the remainder of the joint. Your fingers skim over hers and she blushes a bit, nudging your finger with hers.
“Hey—so how much do I owe you?” You immediately regret ruining the moment the second the words pass your lips.
“Well, flattery works with me—“ you cut her off, “oh yeah? I would’ve kissed you earlier, had I known that.”
She flushes, “you can—um. You can still kiss me. If you want.”
And, just like that, your eyes turn into hearts and start beating rapidly. You surge forward and press your lips to hers, smiling into the kiss when she flicks the joint out of her fingertips and grabs your cheeks, pulling you closer.
Her mouth melds to yours and immediately has you panting like a bitch in heat. She moves one of her hands to pinch at your hip, grasping and probing at you until you wind up straddling her lap. You press your chest into hers and squeak when you feel her hand push your hip down, effectively grinding you down onto her. A strangled whine leaves your lips as she pulls away and begins kissing down the column of your throat.
Her mouth is wet and firm while she sucks and nips on any naked skin she can find, moaning when she feels your fingers card through her hair. Your hips continually rut into hers and she quickly sets a different pace, gripping your hips and dragging you forward and back on her lap. Ellie moans when you grab her hair and pull. Her face is removed from your neck at the force of your tug and she pants to catch her breath before opening her eyes to meet yours.
“How’s free sound?” She gives you a crooked smirk and presses an open-mouthed kiss to your throat.
“Sounds like I’m ripping you off, Ellie.”
She groans and throws her head back onto the couch, “I love the way you say my name. And it’s not ripping me off, babe.”
And you’re blushing again. Babe. She called you babe.
She continues, “think of it as a little sampler. Free shared joint, some ground up weed, and some Ellie.”
You grab her cheeks and squish them together, “only if you swear this sampler is offered to me only. Can’t have anyone stealing my deals.”
She brushes your hands off and smirks again, “like I said earlier, pretty girls only.”
“You said ‘girls’ plural.” She laughs.
“I’ve got three clients. A grown man named Joel, one of the sociology professors—don’t tell anyone I said that. Then you. And I’m a lesbian, so…” She trails off at the end of her sentence and looks down at your lips again, hands splayed across your thighs.
You kiss her again. It’s short and chaste and it leaves Ellie chasing your lips for just one more. Two more. Three. How’s five sound?
She presses kisses to your puckered lips over and over, “all,” kiss, “the weed,” kiss, “you can,” kiss, “dream of.”
Ellie finally pulls away to fully look at you, “I mean it. You can have all the weed you want if you keep kissing me like that.”
————
When you finally clamber off of her lap and detach her hands from your hips it’s almost one in the morning. She sighs while she watches you stuff your ‘goody bag’ into your purse, slipping your shoes back on. Her fingers beckon you back to the couch and she taps your right leg until you bend it and rest your foot on top of her thigh. You were planning on walking home with your shoes untied, but Ellie’s nimble fingers quickly double knot each of your shoes; She presses a kiss to each of your knees before letting them straighten back out.
Her hands find your hips again—shocker— while she walks you to the front door. A kiss is pressed to your lips one last time and she gives you a firm squeeze when you lean in to hug her.
“Come back soon. Fuck that guy, I’m your new dealer for life.” You smile and step outside, “okay.”
She definitely tied your shoes too tight and you make a mental note to fix it when you’re out of her eyesight. As you’re walking down the sidewalk that leads you to campus she calls your name,
“Get home safe, yeah? Text me when you’re back!”
You will definitely text her.
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crocusclump · 28 days
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My name is Skylar White, yo.
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scringler · 30 days
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Well, my name is 「SKYLAR WHITE」 yo
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parasolemn · 9 months
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[Image description: Sketch of Harry Du Bois from Disco Elysium, pointing a gun at himself and posing like he's taking a selfie. A screenshot of the "My name is Skylar White, yo" guys is also there to show what sort of facial expression he's making. Quite horrifying. End ID.]
i think drawing this today inflicted genuine psychological damage. and not just because of that gun. I know I can do better <- tf2er
also shoutout to these older sketches (february or march I think?) I found just sitting on my laptop btw. og for right under cut, IDs in the alt text (edit: i put the OG for the image at the top under the cut as well because I realised I forgot to do that)
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I think it was one I was gonna save for a redraw because I still liked the concept. but. I'll just post it anyway and think about redrawing it later. I have things I need to do. don't ask about what else was on that page btw it was scary
my cat has this very important thing he needs to say: ".................?""
edit: OG for top image
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shinolavolume1 · 8 months
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why is he doing the my name is skylar white yo face
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dendrosys · 1 year
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so im a contestant in the @transtaglias mutual battle… heres why you should vote for me
- i have good thoughts about videogames sometimes
- i also make good art/writing about those videogames. sometimes
- i firmly believe that no genshin impact character is cishet and if i get voted president in this race i WILL make that come true
- ive been practicing making the “MY NAME IS SKYLAR WHITE YO !” face for lile half a year and i can actually do it now.
- uhhh look at my images boy !!
fitzkn fans please pull up and help me win this race !!!
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vergak · 1 year
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your selfie from yesterday with the middle part is so good 💕 you look 5% away from being the my name is skylar white yo guy
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HIM??!
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z0nic · 1 year
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I have a really good one shot idea where zonic psychologically picks scourge apart because he has had enough but I cant think about it without imagining zonic say "My name is Skylar White yo" with the vine booms and all
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theatrekidstatus · 5 months
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Chapter 19
Anthony ramos pov:"We should throw a baby shower/gender reval party" she suggest "your right ill decorate" "thank you so much"
    "i just woke up from a-WHAT THE HELL" she exclaimed "you dont like it" i asked "no......I LOVE IT" she exclaim. "THANK GOODNESS" i was struggling "let me get me dressed then we can invite people" "ok"
I wore this and anthony wore this
"YOU LOOK SO CUTE BEA" she blurted "ditto" Anthony said "do i l-ook b-ig a-lready" i stutter "your not stupid but that was a pretty dumb questions" she whisper "sorry" i stammer "NO IM SORRY" he squeals "i love you so much" i utter "then how do i love you more?" he questions "lets start inviting people"
Dark bitches in white girl
Will you go to our baby shower?
Morgan Saylor:yes
Brian Marcyes
Justin Bartha:yes
Bobbi Salvör Menuez;yes
Chris Noth:yes
Ralph Rodriguez:yes
Men and monters
Dennis:yess
Kelvin Harrison Jr:yes
Jasmine Cephas Jones:yes
Chanté Adams:yes
Rob Morgan:hell yA
Lindsey Morgan:mj,
Pico Alexander:sure
Caitlin Stasey:yes sir
Rita Volk:ill be there
Amadeus Serafini:    ill be there early
Jon Rudnitsky:ill tryqns make it
Zilladegod
Edward Burns:i got you
Zoe Levin:just for y/n
Cara Buono:for yiu bestie boo
Nicole Beharie:OFC
Millie Bobby Brown:if my mom says yes😭😭
Vera Farmiga:mother says you can go😜
Kyle Chandler:so dose dad
Sally Hawkins:im literally hawkins but ye
Ken Watanabe:why not
Zhang Ziyi:kwollio
Charles Dance:coolio my doolio
Bradley Whitford:yes
Thomas Middleditch:sure
Elizabeth Ludlow:if im not tied or nothing
David Strathairn:no.
Aisha Hinds:YES
Randy Havens:I GOT A JOB BUT SURE
Jimmy Gonzales:SURE BESTIE WESTIE
Joe Morton:ONLY FOR MY BESTIE WESTIE Y/N
Laurie DhuHER:DUR
Jonathan Howard:erm sure
Tyler Crumley:cook
Orelon Sidney:sure
CCH Pounder:is there food
Kelli Garner:yeah OFC
Rose Bianco:why even ask
Lyle Brocato:sure cutie
Kevin Shinick:WHO TOL YO ASS TO GO GET A GIRL PREGGY
Josh Winot:his dick odvisouly
Justice Leak:duh stupid bitch
T.C. Matherne:fuck hoe DUR
Al Vicente:YALL ARE SO MEAN😭😭😭 Yeah ant
Natalie Pero:sure ramos
Fiona Hardingham:duh martinez
Paul S. Ryden:mhm ant
Zac Zedalis:cool Anthony
Kenneth Israel:ofc pual
Skylar Denney:WHO
Vince Foster:his middle name
Jesse O'Neill: sí señor
Madeline Brumby: KOOL
Patti Schellhaas KWOLOIO
Joey Beni:CWOOL
Fred Galle:IS Y/N STILL CURE
Joey Thurmond:mhm
Mason Pikea:sure
Aaron Taylor-Johnson:idk
Bryan Cranston:what ev
T.J. Story:DOY
Jason Liles:DOI
John Bubniak:ig
AlExAnDeR hAmIlToN
                                                                              Guess what
Jazzy poo bear😭🙄🔛🔝‼️🗞️🧍🏼‍♀️🫶🏾🤭🎶🗣️🪄✅😑👍🏾🩷😂👦🏿🖕🏾😘❕🔥😔👦🏾💞👹❗️🔊🎩👦🏽:chicken butt?
                  WERE HAVINNG A BABY SHOWER/GENDER REVALTODAY WHO CAN COME
Pippy poo😀🥹☺️😃😅😊😄😂😇😁🤣🙂😆🥲🙃:imma be der first
Mommy nèa(not dirty🙄)😉😗😝🤓😌😙😜😎😍😚🤪🥸🥰😋🤨🤩😘😛🧐🥳:you littarly live down the street from the, but yes from me
Loser Leslie 🤫😐🙄😲🫠🫤😯🥱🤥😑😦😴😵‍💫😶🫨😧🤤🤐🫥😬😮😪🥴:mhm
Weird David 😮‍💨🤢🤕👹😵🤮🤑👺😵‍💫🤧🤠🤡🤐😷😈💩🥴🤒👿👻🤖:yes sir
ThEy DiDnT sAy I CoUlDnT sIng 🤝🏾🤛🏾✌🏾🤌🏾👍🏾🤜🏾🫰🏾🤏🏾👎🏾🫷🏾🤟🏾🫳🏾👊🏾🫸🏾🤘🏾🫴🏾✊🏾🤞🏾👌🏾👈🏻:what do you take for
Christopforgetme👶🏾🧑🏾👩🏾‍🦰👱🏾‍♂️👧🏻👨🏾🧑🏾‍🦰👩🏾‍🦳🧒🏾👩🏾‍🦱👨🏾‍🦰🧑🏾‍🦳👦🏿🧑🏾‍🦱👱🏾‍♀️👨🏾‍🦳👩🏾👨🏾‍🦱:im littarly her dad💀💀💀duh
Oakyyyyy the uncool tree👉🏾🤚🏾🫲🏾✍🏾👆🏾🖐🏾🫱🏾🙏🏾🖖🏾👇🏾💪🏾🫵🏾☝🏾👋🏾🦾🦶🏾✋🏾🤙🏾🖕🏾🦵🏾: im littarly her bro 💀💀
Unhonset feet
Liam Neeson:i thought i star strucked you
Kate Walsh:lemme wash some clothes AND ILL COME
Jai Courtney:I MIGHT BE LATE BUT ILL COME
Jeffrey Donovan:ill be early
Robert Patrick:mhm
Jazzy poo bear😭🙄🔛🔝‼️🗞️🧍🏼‍♀️🫶🏾🤭🎶🗣️🪄✅😑👍🏾🩷😂👦🏿🖕🏾😘❕🔥😔👦🏾💞👹❗️🔊🎩👦🏽: i alr said yes
Michael Malvesti:if you name the baby after me
Tazzie:maybe
Devon Diep:if i rember
Herlin Navarro:can i prefromer
Lewis D. Wheeler:might not be social but sure
Jose Guns Alves:i will be social and go
Osmani Rodriguez:duh
Adam Teper:i will be social but wont go
Mark Rhynard:will the Hamilton cast be there
Jeffrey Wright:doy
Guy Cooper:dur
James Milord:doi
Kayla Caulfield:yes
Adrian M. Mompoint:ye
Arthur Hiou:cool
In the fights😜😜😜😜
Melissa Barrera:if you kid dont be shaking they ass for half of the hights
Lin-Manuel Miranda:IM LITTARLY HER ADOPTIVE DAD FRL FRL
Stephanie Beatriz:ODVI
Ariana Greenblatt:if shes the barrios best
Christopher Jackson:im littarly her third dad
Marc Anthony:sure name twin
Rita Moreno:mabey
Daphne Rubin-Vega:just because i havent seen her in FOREVER
Corey Hawkins:IF THERES FOOD
Leslie Grace:yes
Dascha Polanco:what
Jimmy Smits:can i be the god father
Olga Meredir:GOD MOTHER
Isabella Iannelli:dun
Gregory Diaz IV:mhm
Hailey Jade Panchame:♣︎no♣︎
Luis A. Miranda Jr.:yeah
Susan Pourfar:purr
Hannah Hathaway:bored
Seth Stewart:uh huh
Javier Muñoz:★yes★
Doreen Montalvo:i need to eat
Kadrolsha Ona Carole:today right
The Kid Mero:yes
Nicholas Stewart:yes
Maria Hinojosa:yes
Protest Leader:yes
Serge Onik:yes
Jessica Castro:yes
Daymien Valentino:yes
Leo Moctezuma:yes
Martha Nichols:yes
Julia Harnett:yes
Tom Berklund:yes
Rhapsody James:yes
Ryan Woodle:yes
Noah Catala:yes
Graffiti Pete:yes
Andre Da Silva:yes
Mateo Gómez:yes
Francisco Solorzano:yes
Jos Laniado:yes
Nina Lafarga:yes
Annie Pisapia:yes
Ken Holmes:yes
Nelson Coates:yes
Valéry Lessard:yes
Yesy Garcia:yes
Duh.
Sam Rockwell:duh
Richard Ayoade:duh
Zazie Beetz:duh
Awkwafina:no
Lilly Singh:mhm
Marc Maron:duh
Alex Borstein:duh
Nyvi Estephan:duh
Onoe Matsuya:duh
Craig Robinson:duh
Yūko Kaida:duh
Jean-Pascal Zadi:duh
Ken Yasuda:duh
Kappei Yamaguchi:duh
Kimiko Saitō:duh
Doully:duh
Saverio Raimondo:duh
Fumito Kawai:duh
First Summer Uika:duh
Shohei Osada:duh
Kurt Krömer:duh
Pierre Niney:duh
Loup:duh
Elise Schaap:duh
Igor Gotesman:duh
Serpent:duh
Maasa Takahashi:duh
Sebastian Bezzel:duh
Jannis Niewöhner:duh
Max Giermann:duh
Rômulo Estrela:duh
Fynn Kliemann:duh
Mr. Shark:duh
Alice Belaidi:duh
Andrey Burkovskiy:duh
Sergio Guizé:duh
Walt Dohrn:duh
Babu Santana:duh
Frank Lammers:duh
Mikhail Bashkatov:duh
Joyce Ilg:duh
Luis Lobianco:duh
Valerio Lundini:duh
Barbara Goodson:duh
Gijs Naber:duh
Nasrdin Dchar:duh
Ulrikke Brandstorp:duh
Jody Bernal:duh
Margherita Vicari:xuh
Miss Tarantula:duh
Jeppe Beck Laursen:duh
Denise Aznam:duh
Rayen Panday:duh
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yxami · 6 months
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I am Skylar white, yo
Well my name is skyler white… yo!
And my husband is Walter white yo
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slutfactory · 1 year
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my name is skylar white, yo
my husband is walter white, yo
uh huh
PLS I CAN'T UNHEAR THE GUNSHOT NOISE
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homotron-5000 · 1 year
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Season 5 of stranger things theory guys hear me out:
Walter and Jessie come to Hawkins. The upside down has already taken over and they get caught up in the mess. Jessie Pinkman punches Mike Wheeler because he won't buy meth from him. Will Byers gets angry and drags Jessie to the upside down. This prompts Jonathan and Walter to team up to find them and save them.
Vecna appears puts Walter in a trance. Skylar White comes to Hawkins and finds Walter. She faces off against Vecna and with the power of her, "my name is Skylar White, yo" she defeats him. Vecna crumples to the ground and combusts and Skylar saves Walter. Argyle pulls up, steals all of the meth, snorts it, and saves Will and Jessie. Argyle and Jessie become best friends along with Jonathan. Skylar and Joyce start dating, and Walter marries Hopper since they're both bald.
Mike and Will get together too ig
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