The way Leia naming her son Ben has even more significance now…

Not thinking too much — luke skywalker.

First star wars fic i post on my page. This was the very first fic I wrote when I joined the fandom so seemed fitting to post it first, hope y’all enjoy!! ps. gif is not mine, if you know who it belongs to please let me know to credit them

summary: luke finally gets the courage to make the first move

pairing: luke skywalker x gn!reader

word count: 1.6K

warnings: just fluff, first kiss, not canon-compliant (kinda?)

a reblog would be very much appreciated!

masterlist

It has become a habit of yours to watch Luke train. With no Force-sensitive people around to help, it was up to him to master his abilities.

He usually does a good job, but today he was slightly distracted by Han being...well, Han. He just wouldn't shut up about what a big waste of time this whole "myth" is.

"If it such a waste of time, what are you here?" you asked, tired of hearing his rambling.

"There's nothing much I can do around here. Sadly, watching the kid lose an arm with that sword will be my only entertainment.

"It's a lightsaber," Luke quickly corrected.

"Whatever."

Despite Han's comments, Luke tried his best to ignore him and continue training. He was supposed to be able to predict the attacks on two flying blasters while keeping his eyes closed. You, Han and Chewie decided to keep him company given you had no assignments for today.

Luke has recently resumed his training, which has been pretty difficult to do all by himself. Still, he felt confident that he could continue after the short amount of time he got to share with Ben Kenobi and Yoda.

You were always happy to be able to watch him train. To see that cute smile of his when he gets all excited because he learned new things, or to hear him ramble to you about the Force and his abilities. You absolutely love hearing him talk about something he enjoys so much.

Of course, Luke was oblivious as to why you always seemed to enjoy hearing his stories. Perhaps just as oblivious as you were regarding the real reason why Luke is always so happy to share his discoveries with you. These were your excuses to spend more time with each other.

So, since the two of you couldn't see each other's real intentions and feelings, you thought you were just friends.

To people close to you that saw just how much you two like one another, having to watch you have absolutely no idea whatever was going on was mutual, felt like a nightmare. On of those people is, of course, Han Solo. He could tell Luke liked you even before Luke himself could realize he in fact was very much into you.

But Han wasn't saying anything because Leia forced him to stay quiet and let you two build up your relationship. And given Han is in a very similar situation as Luke regarding a certain princess, he actually listened to her and stayed silent.

So Luke was practicing and you were keeping him company. He was actually doing very well until he apparently got distracted and one of the blasters managed to shoot him, making him lose focus and having to open his eyes.

Han chuckled, shaking his head.

Rolling your eyes, you pretended like you didn't just hear Han's mockery. "Come on, Luke. You can do it," you said, encouraging him to try again. "Just don't think too much."

Luke sighed, but tried again. This time, he was able to dodge all the lasers the flying ball threw his way while keeping his eyes closed. Realizing he succeeded, he opened his eyes to look at you and you immediately saw his incredibly adorable smile, proud of himself for improving.

You smiled back but looked away from him after a few seconds, feeling too nervous to keep eye contact for so long.

"Oh, that's cute," Han mutters sarcastically at your direction. "That was just luck."

"Ignore him," you said in Luke's direction. "I trusted you could do it, Luke. You just needed to trust in yourself."

The boy in front of you smiles shyly after what you've said, instantly remembering your words of encouragement. "Thanks."

"You're welcome."

Now it was Han the one who rolled his eyes. The way you two look at each other and yet neither has figured it out yet? He seriously couldn't understand how you two haven't figured it out.

---

Later that day there was an attack on the Rebellion's base and it was up to the Starfighters to defeat the Imperial fleet that found your location. Han, Chewie and Luke were among those in charge to go out there and fight off the Empire.

You stayed back on the base. Your job mainly consisted on checking the technical aspects of the operations. Make sure the droids are operational, the ships' tanks full for battle, the panel controls working and charged...things like that.

To your dislike, you were assigned to check a fleet that didn't include Luke's starfighter. You quickly did your job in hopes to have enough time to find Luke before he had to leave.

Luke was a skillful pilot, the best you've seen in all your years working with the Rebels. No harm would come to him. Still, you always made sure to say a few words before he had to leave, just to let him know you care.

When you were finally able to find Luke, he was standing next to his starfighter, saying a few things to R2-D2 who was already secured to the craft.

"Hey," you called out as you made your way towards him. "Please tell me you didn't actually think you could leave without saying goodbye," you joked.

Luke smiled as soon as he heard you say that, putting his helmet aside before walking towards you. As soon as he was in front of you, you wrapped your arms around his neck, hugging him tightly. He hugged you back, closing his eyes as he enjoyed being this close to you.

He thought to himself that he would gladly stay here in your arms for as long as he possibly could. He found peace with you, something he never quite felt before with anyone. A feeling he can only hope for you to feel too.

"May the force be with you," you mutter before pulling away.

However, Luke didn't let go of you just yet, still holding you in his arms. Confused as to what he was doing, you stared at him, noticing his blue eyes intensely staring back at yours, a soft smile forming on his face. You could feel your heart poundimg hard against your chest. You didn't try to move away one bit, actually enjoying this proximity.

"What are you doing?" you dared to ask almost in a whisper, your eyes never leaving his. You had a faint idea of what this could mean, but didn't want to let your hopes up just yet.

"Just...not thinking too much."

Before you could ask him what that meant, Luke leaned closer and kissed you. This obviously took you by surprise, never expecting he would do such thing, but eventually relaxed and kissed him back.

This was your first kiss and you couldn't stop thinking this feels so much better than what you expected. Your heart keeps beating extremely fast and you wished for that moment to never end.

He was just as inexperienced as you were. This was his first kiss too, and you were the very first person he ever had strong feelings for. Because he was also new with this, he kissed you timidly and gently, fearing to mess it up if he decided to get too confident.

For you, this was perfect. And you wouldn't want to experience your first kiss any other way, or with anyone else that wasn't him.

When Luke pulled away, you noticed his blue eyes shining brighter than ever, a hypnotizing sight that you could keep looking at for the rest of your life. You were the reason. His eyes are looking this beautiful because of you.

You could feel your entire body burning, still shocked and nervous after sharing a kiss with him. Internally wishing you didn't suck at it and hoping he liked it as much as you did.

After a few seconds you were able to speak, a soft nervous chuckle escaping your lips before rambling. "That was, uh...it– you should...uh, perhaps you should do that more often."

Luke smiled ever wider after your comment, absolutely adoring to see you so nervous. And he was happy to realize he could this kind of impact on you, which resembled the way you make him feel every single day. It was a relief to see his feelings were reciprocated.

"I will," he replied, allowing himself to get more comfortable around you after taking such a risk.

Luke finally let go of you, putting his helmet on and climbing up the stairs to sit inside the starfighter. You could hear R2 beeping and Luke laughing it off, but you couldn't understand what the droid had just said.

You took a few steps back and watched as he got ready to take off. It was then when you felt someone standing next to you and, as you turned your head, you met Leia. She had a faint smile on her lips, staring ahead at the various starfighters.

"He's a very brave and wonderful guy," Leia commented right before turning to look at you, her smile growing bigger. "You deserve nothing less."

"Oh, you saw...well, this is awkward," you mutter.

"I think you two are adorable," your friend replied. "And I'm really happy for you."

You didn't know what to say, simply smiling at her for her kind words. The princess was such a nice girl and you were very glad to have met her and consider her one of your greatest friends.

"By the way, I'm also quite happy that happened because that means Han and Chewie owe me credits now."

"You bet on me and Luke?"

"It was all Han’s idea. I just agreed because I love to see him lose. He said you two were never going to realize you liked each other and decided to bet on it. I said you would most likely end up together in less than two months. Chewie bet on five months."

"Well...it is very fun to see Han lose," was all you said regarding that bet, deciding to let it slide. Leia laughed at your comment and nodded in agreement.

You couldn't wait to see Han's face when he gets back.

simply cannot believe i made a supernatural fic rec list in the year 2020 but here we are

When Worlds Collide

When Zachariah dies, the illusions he’s created die with him.  But before they collapse completely, sometimes they collide. That’s how Castiel goes from cradling Dean Winchester’s broken body one moment, to finding himself face to face with Dean Smith in the next.

note: basically endverse!cas’s world collapses right after endverse!dean is killed by lucifer and he gets thrown into the it’s a terrible life verse. drama and love and a whole lot of fuckery ensue. it’s tagged as major character death but it’s not really

Broadway Musical

This is the day that marked the Holy and Blessed Union of Dean Winchester and Jo Harvelle.

The merging of prominent bloodlines is always a grand occurrence, but breeding pedigree hunter families like Winchester and Harvelle is something to be rejoiced. It is also something to be meticulously planned, which thankfully the Host is very good at.

note: an AU where dean and jo are destined to fall in love and have two sons who will bring on the apocalypse and be the vessels for michael and lucifer. only problem is cupid’s arrows don’t make them fall in love with each other and heaven promptly starts freaking the fuck out so cas slips into a vessel and tries to do some matchmaking to get the whole end of the world thing back on track. it’s tagged as unrepentant crack and that pretty much sums it up, but it’s also a very funny and enjoyable read

a turn of the earth

Dean’s your typical half-orphaned, monster-killing 22-year-old until a trenchcoated stranger crashes into his back windshield one September night, claiming he’s an angel that knows him from the future and that he’s on the run.

Frigging fantastic.

note: listen i LOVE a good time travel fic

How (thanks to Gabriel) Dean and Castiel (accidentally) raised each other (and Sam)

In which, Gabriel meddles with the time line and Castiel becomes Dean's angel rather sooner than intended.

note: after lucifer stabs gabriel in hammer of the gods, gabriel uses his very last bit of grace to travel back to the beginning of time and decree castiel the angel of thursdays and dean winchester. fast forward a few eons and castiel hears mary’s dying cry. he shows up too late to save her, but he decides that a human life is very short in the grand scheme of things so he can play guardian angel to dean (and by extension sam) while also fulfilling his duties to heaven. not only is this pretty much my favorite supernatural fic, it’s also one of my favorite fics in general

The Shattered One

When it struck Castiel, he was in mid-flight. It dropped him out of the sky like a sparrow buffeted by gale-force winds. Castiel set down the first place he could find. He ended up standing in a field in Switzerland, swaying on his feet and staring down at his body, dazed by what it had just done.

note: okay so listen. this is tagged as mpreg but that’s kind of a stretch imo. it’s not like... mpreg mpreg in the sense that it deals with angel reproduction and has nothing to do with sex or pregnancy. angel reproduction goes like this: a section of an angel’s grace will suddenly and randomly break off and begin to grow on it’s own. after a certain period of time, another angel has to offer a piece of their grace and the two pieces will combine to form a new angel. that new angel is a fully developed, fully functional angel and is considered a new brother/sister instead of an offspring.

cas’s grace shatters which means he’s fucked because this takes place in season 5 after he’s defied heaven. no other angel will offer up a piece of their grace so his own is basically going to rip itself apart, killing him in the process. when dean and sam find out cas is going to die, dean offers up part of his soul in place of another angel’s grace. what results is a new angel that has just enough human in it that it takes the shape of a human baby and sends pretty much all of their lives into a tailspin.

ALSO just a heads up this is definitely more pre-destiel despite the relationship tag. there’s a sequel where im pretty sure they do get together but i haven’t read it so i cant’s say for sure.

Kiss You When It’s Dangerous

When his partner Uriel, betrays him, Federal Agent Castiel Novak is saved from becoming a ritual sacrifice by brothers Dean and Sam Winchester.

note: FBI!cas gets thrown headfirst into the supernatural. tagged as major character death, but again it’s not really

My Roots Take Flight

After forty years in Hell, Dean’s more than willing to accept the offer: become a guardian angel and earn his freedom. But his new ward seems destined to hunt alongside Sam, and there are secrets in Heaven that the angels don’t want found out. Dean’s going to have to choose between his duty and the people he loves- and to work out just where Castiel fits in.

note: season 4 au where dean is an angel and cas is a human except it’s way more complicated than that

Peace and Good Luck To All Men

Christmas in the Milton household was difficult enough without the added complication of guests- and if Luke and Gabriel placing bets on who can get with Sam first wasn’t bad enough, then Cas developing a ridiculous crush on his sister’s boyfriend definitely is. 

note: the one where michael, lucifer luke, gabriel, anna and cas are all human siblings but michael and lucifer luke are still trying to kill each other, gabriel is still Like That and cas is still super into dean which is pretty inconvenient considering he’s with anna.

Asunder

Wherefore they are no more twain, but one flesh. What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder. (Matthew 19:6) 

note: it’s been a very long time since i read this, but from what i remember it’s an AU where they’re all human and dean brings his friend/co-worker cas as his “date” to sam and ruby’s wedding for moral support. when sam was in college, he met ruby and they started using drugs together. after several failed attempts at helping him get clean, dean eventually cut sam off and it’s been years since they’ve spoken. even though sam and ruby are now both sober, dean blames ruby for everything that happened and the only reason he’s even going to the wedding is because bobby and ellen basically force him to. again, it’s been years and years since i read this so i can’t remember a lot of the details, but i do know that despite this being a dean/cas fic a lot of the focus is dean rebuilding his relationship with sam and that’s what i remember really liking about it.

Hanged, Drawn, and Quartered

Death brings Sam back — sort of.

note: a general fic involving only sam and dean. sam’s soul is so damaged from its time in the cage that when death brings it back, it shatters into pieces and so does sam. like literally. there’s four different sams now, each representing a distinctive part of his personality. sounds cracky but it’s actually surprisingly angsty and focuses on how the sams and dean are adjusting to their new reality and each other

Point Pleasant

(okay so this fic was deleted but i’m putting in on here anyway because the author has since turned it into a novel and had it published. im sure old pdfs of the fic are floating around but i highly recommend reading the novel version. if you know it was based on a destiel fic then it’s really easy to see those influences in the writing and the characters but it can stand up on it’s own. also!!!! it has pretty much the coolest take on the mothman’s origin story that i’ve ever heard.)

Ben Wisehart (Dean Winchester) grew up in the idyllic town of Point Pleasant, West Virginia. An early encounter with the supernatural shaped his worldview and served as the catalyst for his career as a bestselling horror writer. Thirteen years after abandoning his home, Ben returns to the town to investigate the apparent reemergence of the terrifying creature responsible for his childhood nightmares. In Point Pleasant, Ben is confronted not only by the town’s resident monster, the Mothman, but also by his former best friend, Sheriff Nicholas Nolan (Cas Novak). Together, Ben and Nicholas (Dean and Cas) uncover the mystery of the monster in the woods and discover that the ghosts that haunt us are sometimes made of flesh and blood. And sometimes, they lead us home.

Sympathy for the Devil (and Dean Winchester)

this is not so much a rec as it is a request.

basically an au version of season 5 (and kind of the whole series really). when god cast lucifer out of heaven, he tore out his grace. lucifer’s grace was put into the cage, but lucifer himself fell to earth and spent thousands and thousands of years reincarnating as a human. his latest reincarnation? dean winchester. so when sam opens the cage, lucifer’s grace is released and dean realizes that he’s lucifer. part of him still kind of wants to start the apocalypse but the other part of him has a whole new appreciation for humanity considering he now remembers every human life he’s ever lived. it’s made more complicated by the fact that dean (/lucifer) doesn’t really want to tell anyone that he’s apparently the devil so he has to keep his now angel status on the dl and also because despite heaven wanting the apocalypse to start, michael went missing from heaven shortly after lucifer was cast out and no one has any idea where he’s at.

this fic was deleted, but if anyone happens to have a pdf copy let me know. i would be highly appreciative!

Why Reylos Are A Bright Spot In The STAR WARS Fandom

It’s impossible to parse all of this out or to really say who’s “right” or “wrong” or what “right” and “wrong” even mean in fandom spaces. From my vantage point, the Reylo community is one of the more forgiving and accepting out there. It’s comprised of not only women, but plenty of men and non-binary Star Wars fans, from different races and orientations and experiences. And that’s true of any shipping community. In a fandom as large as Star Wars, there should be room for all of us to express joy or grief or surprise or disinterest in our cultivated spaces. It’s how we all choose to cross-pollinate that could use some work.

But Reylos aren’t deserving of the intense condemnation that comes from larger voices in the fandom. The ridicule feels specific and exclusionary, and rooted in gatekeeping sexism. Comparing them to the Fandom Menace is ridiculous. That group created blogs dedicated to roasting journalists, creators, and fans. Meanwhile, the Reylo community (along with Ben Solo fans) poured much of their frustration and sadness over The Rise of Skywalker into an act of good, by raising money for Adam Driver’s charity, Arts in the Armed Forces. How much money? As of this writing, over $76,000, more than double the charity’s fundraising goal for an entire fiscal year.

full article below the cut:

Why is romantic love such a controversial thing in fandom? It’s something I ask myself a lot, as a person who writes about shipping and who desires the kind of love that stories tell me might exist. I’ve spent most of my life in fandom spaces—participating in conversations or observing and examining them—and have witnessed firsthand how objectionable fictional romance can be, especially in fandoms that appeal to and target men. Why is this the case, and why is romance a thing we use to punish women looking for escapism in genre stories?

It’s hard to say, but it remains an endemic and undeniable strain. Shipping, which is fandom code for wanting two characters to be together, is often snickered at or seen as some frivolous element of appreciation. It can lead to shaming that feels personal and accusatory, as if your interest in a fictional relationship is a roadmap to your own intentions and experience. This attitude towards shippers is especially present in the Star Wars fandom, where the relationship between Rey and Kylo Ren is steeped in a seemingly never-ending controversy. There are fervent supporters of the romance between these characters, a plentiful contingent of opposers, and those who don’t really care one way or another but still seem fit to criticize.

Why has the “Reylo” ship created such a stir? Let’s dig into this subset of the Star Wars fandom: where it started, why it’s accumulated so much negativity, and why the Reylos don’t deserve the bad reputation they’ve acquired, especially in the wake of The Rise of Skywalker.

THE ORIGINS OF REYLO

The release of The Last Jedi was a rough time for a lot Star Wars fans. The film—the eighth in the Skywalker saga and the second in the Disney-era sequel trilogy—made a lot of bold storytelling choices, which divided the fandom into camps. Those who loved the meditations on the Force, Luke Skywalker’s troubled hero’s journey, the complicated characterization of Poe Dameron, Finn and Rose’s failed mission, and the strange developing bond between Rey and Kylo felt at odds with anyone who saw otherwise. Many disliked Luke’s arc, or the apparent sidelining of Poe and Finn, or the democratization of the Force. The disagreements spiraled into something bordering collective mania. It’s a debate that still rages today, and that seeped into the conversations we’re currently having about The Rise of Skywalker.

I loved the movie, but found the discourse numbing. Positive Twitter conversations were instantly marred by detractors, and every passionate argument was upended by accusatory nitpicks. I felt discouraged from participating in any of it, and I felt bitter towards the Star Wars community in general. Until I found the Reylos.

After stumbling on podcasts like What The Force?, Skytalkers, and Scavenger’s Hoard—all female-hosted programs—I realized there were plenty of encouraging conversations about The Last Jedi happening in fandom. I also realized most of them were Reylo-oriented. Suddenly, I was exposed to the exact conversations I always wanted to have about Star Wars: deep dives into mythology, redemption arcs, symbolism and dualism, religion, poetry. And all of that was encompassed in Reylo. All of these larger stories, focused through these characters joined by fate and purpose, who represented opposing ideologies of the Force.

There was so much to dig into. Rey and Kylo have a classic enemies-to-lovers storyline, a romantic trope seen in fairytales like Beauty and the Beast, classic literature like Pride and Prejudice, mythological stories like that of Hades and Persephone, even modern genre television like Buffy the Vampire Slayer. It’s typically used in women-oriented storytelling, as it affords duality and compassion to both parties; a distribution of power that makes the women as complicated, compromised, and interesting as their male counterparts. Rey’s interest in Kylo adds a layered intrigue to a character otherwise patently “good” and “pure,” words commonly associated with women, forcing them into palatable, antiquated gender roles.

Their relationship feeds a part of the fanbase who craves that kind of female protagonist. One who represents their own burgeoning lust, complicated compassion for the men they chose to care about, and temptation towards things we’re told to fear. Through the Reylo relationship, Rey took on another angle, one that finally made Star Wars feel like a story for me.

THE BACKLASH

I also learned right away what it meant to be a Reylo in the Star Wars fandom. The relationship between the light-sided Rey and dark-sided Kylo was riddled in turmoil. In The Force Awakens, a scene where he straps her down and interrogates her is considered by many to be abusive. The language Kylo uses to seduce Rey to his side in The Last Jedi is also seen as manipulative and problematic. He tells her that no one knows her like he does. In their opinion, he’s attempting to groom her to his standards, to turn her into what he wants against her own will. Those against the relationship will tell you that it’s a dangerous and negative message to send to young girls.

And here’s where I’ll say something potentially controversial amongst my fellow Reylos: I don’t think these people are “wrong.” Because everyone’s experience and perspective is their own thing to interrogate, and it’s not up to me to tell people how to feel about something–even if I disagree entirely. What I do take issue with, however, is the need to interrogate someone else’s preferences or fantasies. There is an infantilizing element to the backlash, as if those opposed think that Reylos haven’t reconciled with the themes presented to them, and are merely choosing to ignore them because they think Adam Driver is hot.

The way I see it, relationships like Reylo—power fantasies oriented on the feminine psyche, with an antagonistic male—fulfill two things I love in storytelling. They are pure escapism; the happy ending those of us drawn to the incurable are never afforded. And they are instructive, as they exemplify the patriarchal schism between men and women: that we are not equal, but that women love men anyway because of the compassion that comes naturally to balance that division. It shows how we can mend those gaps through patience and understanding. It’s archetypical and fantastical, sure, but that’s what Star Wars is: a fairy tale that wrestles with society and humanity in broad strokes.

That said, there are other reasons for dissent. Some fans ship Rey and Finn, and see their romance as a better avenue for a healthy relationship. Some have experienced personal trauma and can’t abide a romance that mimics and negates their pain. Others just don’t see the Reylo thing at all. Absolutely all of that is valid. Shipping should never be a competition or an authoritative moral stance on any side. Rey/Finn shippers are just as valid as Reylos because it speaks to what someone personally craves and desires. The shaming shouldn’t exist on any side—but because it does, the passionate defense comes in.

REYLOS DON’T DESERVE THE HATE

That knee-jerk self defense has drawn a lot of ire to the Reylo community in the aftermath of The Rise of Skywalker, the final film in the Star Wars sequel trilogy. On paper, the Reylos were given a lot of what they desire: Kylo Ren is redeemed and turns back into Ben Solo. Rey and Ben fight side by side and even share a kiss. But then Ben dies and Rey ends the movie alone, something that irked the shippers. They saw the ending as a grim conclusion for Ben and a way of punishing Rey for expressing her desires. To many, the ending feels hopeless and feeds into this stereotypical notion that for a woman to be strong, she must be single — as if romantic love weakens us.

There are other ways to read the ending, and many fans found power in it. That’s the beauty of film: that it’s entirely subjective. But in their profession of disappointment, the Reylos once again became a punching bag for the fandom at large. A recent BuzzFeed article compared the way Reylos reacted to The Rise of Skywalker to the way the Fandom Menace—a trolling, abusive, anti-Disney hate group—reacted to The Last Jedi. (Never mind that their “source” for this reaction was a tweet from a prominent member of the Fandom Menace, and that many of the complaints in question were either fabricated or from non-Reylo accounts.)

It’s impossible to parse all of this out or to really say who’s “right” or “wrong” or what “right” and “wrong” even mean in fandom spaces. From my vantage point, the Reylo community is one of the more forgiving and accepting out there. It’s comprised of not only women, but plenty of men and non-binary Star Wars fans, from different races and orientations and experiences. And that’s true of any shipping community. In a fandom as large as Star Wars, there should be room for all of us to express joy or grief or surprise or disinterest in our cultivated spaces. It’s how we all choose to cross-pollinate that could use some work.

But Reylos aren’t deserving of the intense condemnation that comes from larger voices in the fandom. The ridicule feels specific and exclusionary, and rooted in gatekeeping sexism. Comparing them to the Fandom Menace is ridiculous. That group created blogs dedicated to roasting journalists, creators, and fans. Meanwhile, the Reylo community (along with Ben Solo fans) poured much of their frustration and sadness over The Rise of Skywalker into an act of good, by raising money for Adam Driver’s charity, Arts in the Armed Forces. How much money? As of this writing, over $76,000, more than double the charity’s fundraising goal for an entire fiscal year.

I also know that the Reylos helped me find my way back to loving Star Wars, gave me endless professional and creative inspiration for the last two years, and deepened my interest and love of storytelling and mythology. I know I’m not alone, and I know that the Reylo shipping community has made Star Wars finally feel like a fandom they were allowed to love. That’s something I hope fans with different access points to the world of Star Wars might think about before they wag a finger or call Reylos fake fans or mock their interests and experience. Star Wars can and should be for everyone, and how we find our way into the galaxy far, far away is a unique, personal, and beautiful thing. Love is what it’s all about at the end of the day. Even romantic love.

by Lindsey Romain for Nerdist [find article HERE]

Keep Your Enemies Close, But Your Spouses Closer

Chapter 5 from One Bride for One Brother: A Tale from the Stockholm Files

Loosely based on Seven Brides for Seven Brothers

Follow on FF.net or AO3

Rey chewed desolately on her breakfast as she stared at the steel colored walls of her prison cell. One month. Hard to believe, but she’d been married one month. Well, not married in the truest sense, she’d made sure of that. She eyed the saber-damaged desk across the room, remembering how poorly Kylo had taken the news.

“We are married. That’s part of the deal, that you sleep with me.”

“Yeah, well, most married people love each other, don’t they? And I most certainly don’t love you. Who could?”

She’d remembered her surprise at his wince. That was when she’d understood why he so frequently wore a mask. He wasn’t good at keeping his feelings hidden. He had an easily read face. It hadn’t taken long for the look of hurt to pass and to be replaced by seething anger, Kylo’s go-to emotion.

“I don’t care if you love me,” he sneered. “You made vows.”

She should have been scared. Any sane being would have been, but after all that she’d been through…the fight in the forest, being kidnapped, forced into marriage, saying goodbye to her only friend…she couldn’t muster up the fear. He would do whatever he was going to do, but she would stand her ground.

“The only way you’ll have me is if you take me by force. I will never sleep with you. Never.”

In an instant, Kylo’s saber had burned bright red and the desk took a valiant beating.

“Fine, but you will still sleep in my chambers. Whether you want the bed or the floor is up to you,” he spat before stalking out the door.

And not much had changed in their relationship since then. She was still his captor. Oh, she was allowed to roam The Finalizer, but all eyes were always on her. There wasn’t a move she made that that wasn’t being surveilled by others. She thought she’d do some spying for the Resistance and maybe find a way to contact them, but she could never find a moment to herself. There was always a stormtrooper or officer nearby.

She had learned some things. For instance, she felt she had a good idea of the layout of the ship. She’d even been able to help out in the engine room from time to time and was learning the ship’s strengths and weaknesses. But most of her days were pretty boring. She mostly ate and read. She’d even gained some weight, but the food was so good here unlike anything she’d had on Jakku that she couldn’t resist. She’d found the training room and had watched as a sweaty Kylo sparred with a subordinate, but had never been allowed to train there herself. So she made do with the confines of this room, making sure she was fit and ready for the time when she was finally able to escape.

There was one area that they’d both bent a little. That first night, Rey had been determined to sleep on the floor as having a room to herself had been forbidden. And there was no way she would lay next to the man she despised, no matter how warm or comfortable his bed was. She had her pride. But outer space was cold and the floor was even colder. She’d lay shivering on the floor for a little over an hour before she’d felt strong arms lifting her and dumping her unceremoniously on the bed.

“I’m not going to force myself on you,” he said gruffly. “Sleep here. I’ll sleep in the chair.”

And that’s how their first week of marriage had passed. She stubbornly settling herself on the floor each night before her new husband came to pick her up and put her on the bed. She didn’t let her mind ponder too long on how comforting being in his arms was. In fact, it was on one night when she’d been particularly sleepy and found herself burrowing into his chest that she’d realized something had to change. This routine of theirs was becoming dangerous. She’d instantly frozen in his arms and had wiggled out of them before they’d reached the bed.

“You need to stop picking me up,” she said censoriously, fuming at him as much as herself.

“You need to stop sleeping on the floor.”

“Fine. I’ll sleep on the bed if you’ll sleep in the chair.”

“Isn’t that what we’ve been doing?”

“Well, now, it’s…um…a spoken agreement.”

A few weeks had passed with this arrangement being honored by both parties. But a few days ago, she’d noticed how stiff and sore Kylo seemed. She knew it must be mighty uncomfortable to sleep in that chair every night. He might be a monster but he was still human. She’d even suggested he find another bed on the ship.

“Sleep in a room other than my own chambers? That’ll make me look like an imposing leader,” he’d scoffed.

Three nights ago, she caved. Earlier in the day, she’d asked for extra pillows from the supply room. That night she arranged the pillows in a vertical line halfway down the bed.

“This is your side of the bed,” she said when he walked in after finishing his evening rounds. “As long as you stay on your side, we won’t have any problems. Understand?”

He’d nodded and after using the fresher had joined her in the bed. She was so nervous she’d barely gotten a wink of sleep. In the middle of the night, she’d turn to look at him. He was sleeping on his back, his eyes closed, his chest rising and falling slowly. Her eyes studied his moles, his large nose, the prominent Adam’s apple, the long, dark curls she was so tempted to touch. In his sleep, he wasn’t Kylo Ren, he was simply Ben Solo, Han Solo and General Organa’s son.

She thought of all that his mother had told her about him. How he’d gone awry, how much his parents regretted about how they’d chosen to raise him, how much his mother still loved him even after all he’d done. Rey found herself wishing she’d known this Ben Solo fellow. She could have loved him.

As Kylo nodded and pretended to attend to what Hux was saying, his mind wandered to the fact that today was his one month anniversary. And yet so little of his life had changed when he got married. The only difference was that he now had a roommate who hated his guts and was eager to escape. He still slept alone although that had recently changed, he thought to himself, a glimmer of a smile on his lips. Maybe little by little he was making her warm up to him. Despite the new change in sleeping arrangements, he still felt very alone in his marriage. Rey did not seem to want to get to know him better. They rarely talked. There was a lot of silence.

On top of that Snoke and Hux were highly suspicious of his wife since marrying had not given them the information they sought - the location of Luke Skywalker. Although to be honest, that had been more his personal mission. But they weren’t happy that his marriage to Rey had proved fruitless and took every opportunity to disparage her and question his reasons for marrying her.

Try as he might, he’d never been able to get the intel on where Luke Skywalker was. He’d even tried slipping into her mind while she was asleep but to no avail. So he’d ended up lying to cover for her saying that she had never seen the map herself. He’d directed their focus to seeking out the droid and his owner, some pilot name Dameron. Eventually, they’d stopped questioning him, but he knew he couldn’t make any more missteps. It was no longer just about protecting his hide, but Rey’s too.

When Hux finished speaking, Kylo nodded curtly as if he’d listened to the other man’s whole spiel and returned to his chambers to eat lunch, only to discover that the rooms were empty. Rey must be out exploring the ship again.

Kylo plopped into his desk chair and shook his lunch out on top of the battered desk before him. As he bit into his sandwich, he recalled how it had sustained those injuries.

“We are married. That’s part of the deal, that you sleep with me.” He argued.

“Yeah, well, most married people love each other, don’t they? And I most certainly don’t love you. Who could?”

Her words had cut, hearing how she truly felt about him, because he had struggled from a young age at feeling good enough to be loved. His own parents hadn’t loved him. Why would Rey be any different? The painful thought had made him flinch. He remembered the brief flicker of pity in his wife’s eyes before he became enraged that she thought him weak. He didn’t need or want her pity.

“I don’t care if you love me,” he sneered. “You made vows.”

For twenty-nine years, his life had been centered around the Force exploring and training in the light and dark sides of it. He had had little use for human interactions because he knew they would only end in disappointment. He’d just wanted power and to live up to his grandfather’s reputation. But after meeting Rey, he started to care about another human being. He wanted human contact, human touch, and she was denying him access to it, perpetuating the theme of his life, never getting what he wanted.

“The only way you’ll have me is if you take me by force. I will never sleep with you. Never.”

How those words had burned him. He knew how little she thought of him as she said them. Sure he had done some questionable things but he would never force himself upon a woman. When they’d married, he had only assumed they’d do what all other married couples did. She apparently had other plans.

“Fine, but you will still sleep in my chambers. Whether you want the bed or the floor is up to you.”

At the time, he had meant what he’d said. If she didn’t want to sleep with him, she could sleep on the floor, but that night he’d ended up eating his own words. All it had taken was seeing her slight frame shivering on the floor. He had been stubborn at first, planning on playing the waiting game. Surely she’d come to the warmth of the bed in a sense of self-preservation. For well over an hour, they’d played a foolish game of chicken until he could bear the sight of her trembling, undernourished body no longer. He’d gotten out of bed, scooped her up all the while ignoring her protest, and dropped her on the bed none too gently. For a moment, he planned on joining her on the other side of the bed, but the wide-eyed fear in Rey’s eyes had made him pause.

“I’m not going to force myself on you,” he grumbled bitterly. “Sleep here. I’ll sleep in the chair.”

For a week, they fell into this routine. Rey making up a pallet for herself on the ground. He only being able to last for approximately thirty minutes before he scooped her up. Each night, he had made the journey of depositing her to the bed last longer and longer. It was the only time she allowed him to touch her and he was quick to take advantage of it. Even though she faked outrage each time. She must have caught on to how much he enjoyed it because she put a stop to it after a few days. She eventually slept in the bed willingly although she’d made it clear he was not welcome to sleep there. Instead, he was given the joy of sleeping in his desk chair each night.

But then, something had changed. He wasn’t quite sure what, but he wouldn’t question the good fortune that had befallen him. One evening, he’d arrived to his quarters to find multiple pillows in the middle of the bed.

“This is your side of the bed,” she said motioning to the left side of the bed. “As long as you stay on your side, we won’t have any problems. Understand?”

He’d nodded and then promptly retreated to the fresher where he had to physically restrain himself from pumping his fist in the air. Progress.

His heart had pounded so loudly that it took him ages to fall asleep. He had simply closed his eyes and basked in the newness of the experience. At one point, he felt her eyes roving over him and he did his best to pretend he was asleep. She’d stared at him for what felt like ages before he had heard a light snore emitting from her side of the bed.

Feeling that it was safe to open his eyes, he turned as gently as his big frame allowed and allowed himself to stare at her fine and lovely features. Kylo noticed that she’d gain some weight and smiled. He liked her plump and rosy. He liked everything about her even when she made him so mad that he saw red. He didn’t just like her. He loved her.

The Rise of Skywalker: Part Two

Read Part One here.

One of the many things I’ve been grappling with over the 2 weeks since TROS came out is the validity and cause of my upset and anger. And it centres round the question: if Reylo had ended differently, if they’d had a happy ending, if Ben Solo had lived, would I still hate the film? Would I still be angry? Or would I forgive and overlook its other myriad flaws? And connected to those central questions is another that pressed upon me, namely: am I angry and upset because it is a bad film on multiple levels that insults its audience and breaks its own mythology in a way that is deeply distressing to female viewers and is fundamentally a poorly written film or do I only feel like that because I am a disappointed shipper? Am I only upset because I have got so attached to my HEA fluffy fanfic that I’ve lost sight of the story that canon is actually telling?

There’s a wider issue contained in these questions that I’ve been asking myself which is that there is a judgement implicit that responding to a film purely as a shipper is a bad thing, that it invalidates my criticism and my feelings if, in fact, I am simply an upset and disappointed shipper who wanted a happy ending. That’s an issue that is definitely worth pursuing but elsewhere.

It’s been two weeks. I’ve read multiple twitter threads, listened to bits of WTForce podcast (it’s very long... and was making me cry...), many reviews of the film, and today I finally started reading Valerie Estelle Frankel’s From Girl to Goddess: The Heroine’s Journey through Myth and Legend which is blowing my mind and giving me the confidence to say what I’ve known for a while:

My feeling that TROS is a terrible film on multiple levels - all of them actually - is valid. You may disagree and that’s fine. It’s only an opinion. But it’s my opinion and I stand by it. And, returning to the initial question that has been perplexing me - in fact I cannot separate the way the characters of Rey and Kylo/Ben were treated from the film’s other flaws. If Ben had lived, if Reylo had had a happy ending, if their relationship had played out differently, even if they had both died, yes, I would have been more inclined to forgive the film its many other flaws and misjudgements, but the fact is, if Reylo had been written in a satisfactory way then it would have been a very different film. Reylo is only one - one massive, egregious error - thing that contributes to the mess that this films. It is not the only thing that is enraging and upsetting but it is probably the biggest. I’ll talk about these other things in yet another post, but for now...

Let’s talk about Reylo.

tl;dr: Reylo is canon and the movie still sucked. Here’s a 5000+ word dissertation on why. Maybe don’t read if my opinions on this are going to make you sad/angry.

I’m going to break down my problems with Reylo in this film logically and honestly, I’m not sure I’m going to say anything that hasn’t already been said, but perhaps reading another perspective will help others who feel similarly? I’m guessing it’s going to help me if I write about it. We’ll see.

There are three problems. There’s the problem of the fate of Ben Solo. In a way, that’s the easiest and simplest one to deal with. Death was always on the cards as a possible ending for him. A tragic hero who commits terrible acts is redeemed in death by saving the world. The death of this character is... not a surprise and has always been an ending I worried about because I’m a shipper and I like happy endings over sad ones. And I’ve been very convinced by the meta and arguments of shippers who have argued passionately that Ben had to live. However, arguably the problem is not the death in itself but the circumstances and the context. So I’ll come back to that.

The second problem is that of Rey. Rey’s development (or lack of it) and especially her ending. Yep. This is a big problem. Far bigger IMO than the death of Ben which, while tragic, could have been beautiful and fitting.

Thirdly, is Ben and Rey together. Reylo. Their relationship and the way it plays out and the way, ultimately, all of this breaks the mythology being established in previous films.

So three very interlinked problems.

To summarise. In TROS Kylo regresses to being the Supreme Leader and trying to source dark power. This is not terribly surprising considering the ending of TLJ. Rey also regresses to someone who is training and who does not believe she is worthy of Luke’s lightsaber. This is surprising because Rey has already accepted her destiny and her role as a Jedi at the end of TLJ. There is no reason for her to feel insecure about it a year later in TROS.

Rey and Kylo connect through their Force Bond and fight. Their anger is understandable but these fights continuously rehash exactly the same material as what was covered in TLJ, leaving me feeling, well, not very much. Kylo is trying to tell Rey something about who she is (a question that was resolved in TLJ) and Rey is angry at him because of reasons. 

There are some good parts here. Unlike a lot of people, I really liked the fight at Pasaana. I felt it took something from TLJ and added something else. It was a rehash of the throne room fight over the lightsaber but while that conflict was entirely personal over an object that meant something to them but not the wider population (beyond what it could do as a weapon), the same conflict here was over a transport ship containing real people and Chewie (apparently), a character of importance to both. So what happened is that their inability to reconcile with each other and meet half way is manifested in a completely balanced conflict which has a living cost. Chewie dies! Rey kills someone dear to her - accidentally, sure - but she now has a body count showing how truly destructive her fight with Kylo is. It is a symbol of how necessary it is they work together and find balance. Daisy Ridley’s acting here was great and I felt genuinely shocked. Shocked that Rey plunged so immediately into a kind of darkness that put her on a level with Kylo and shocked that Chewie was killed off so casually without warning or build-up - a real casualty of war and the raised stakes in this film. I thought it was a great way to build on TLJ and extend it.

So you can imagine how I felt when Chewie’s death was retconned.

Pretty similar to how I felt when C-3PO got his memory back.

I will probably talk more about this in Part Three, which is my wider issues with the film, but it’s sort of unavoidable mentioning them here because of course the way the film invalidates serious emotion by showing in so many ways that Death Is Not The End and is consequently meaningless impacts on Reylo and the fact that Ben dies.

Another nice moment was the snatching of the beads through the Force Bond. I mean, Kylo literally stole some fertility-coded beads from Rey’s neck!? Uh, this subtext is rapidly becoming text, as they say. Pasaana was weird though, right? Rey talks to children, is at a festival of life, she is fulfilling her role of becoming a symbolic mother which she started in TLJ and which fits the child Jedi at the end of that film (who was never seen again but we’ll deal with that later) and Kylo receives a gift of a necklace (a feminine symbol) from her immediately afterwards... This is pretty hot and heavy symbolism. Of their union and a future involving children, real or metaphorical.

And Rey learns how to heal with the Force, trying it on a giant worm as practice. This fits with her heroine’s journey - she is not using the lightsaber (a symbol of masculine power) but is using her power to preserve and save, which is feminine power. So far so good. I mean, it’s a shame they are wasting all these Force Bond sessions backtracking on TLJ to the extent that instead of enjoying their interactions, I’m going “Yeah yeah yeah okay but we’ve already done this but better”. But there’s still development so it’s okay and sometimes it’s even kind of hot.

Rey Palpatine. 

Oh dear.

Look, it’s not the thing itself. The union of a Skywalker and a Palpatine, the balance coming from the union of two great families on either side of the Force, is honestly not a bad idea at all. Ben as the Skywalker with a bit of darkness in him balanced by Rey the Palpatine with a bit of light in her. BALANCE. It could be beautiful. 

Unfortunately it isn’t. Rey’s lineage was resolved really well in TLJ. Rey Nobody is a great idea for all the reasons everyone already says - opening up the Force to everyone instead of keeping it as a kind of aristocratic lineage etc. Retconning this is really unnecessary and also sends a terrible message to the audience, especially women, as everyone has already discussed to death. Rey is literally told her power comes from a creepy old man who won’t stay dead instead of something innate within her. Instead of letting the past die, we are digging it up like an overzealous and ignorant 19th century British aristocrat let loose in Egypt with a pick-axe and period-applicable racism. Rey is then told that her parents sold her and abandoned her… to protect her. Another great message. And apparently Luke, Han and Leia all knew this?????? Honestly, I was confused by all this when I was watching the film but from what I’ve read afterwards it seems this is the case and in which case not only does that not make literally any sense at all in terms of what happened in TFA and TLJ but also has pretty awful implications for the OT characters and how they related to Ben. 

As I mentioned, it is also unnecessary for the plot for Rey to be a Palpatine. If Palpatine has to come back (which he doesn’t but okay whatever) then surely it’s enough that Rey is extremely strong in the Force for him to either want to kill her or want to control her? Like, literally that’s what he did to Anakin. Why does she have to be related to him unless the film is making some very unfortunate conclusions about blood. Good blood, bad blood… yeeeaaaaaah, this isn’t great as a message. It could be but that’s not the story the first two films have told. Also does Palpatine want to kill her or control her? Like, I’m genuinely not clear on that. I’m not sure he is. I’m not sure the film is. What is actually going on? Also if Palpatine has been controlling Ben his entire life why the hell didn’t he control Rey? Surely it’s easier to invade and control the mind of his own flesh and blood than that of another random Force child he isn’t related to? Who is surrounded by other powerful Force users? When Rey is all alone? Like if Palpatine is able to build up an insanely massive army that nobody has noticed across the Galaxy while still being kind of dead, surely he can access the mind of Rey on Jakku? Also, how did he manage to impregnate a human woman while being sort of dead and old? On both a mythical level and on the level of a question of taste and plausibility, HOW??? 

THIS PLOT MAKES LITERALLY NO SENSE WHAT IS GOING ON AAAARGGGHHH 

And breathe. 

So anyway, Rey Palpatine. Rey and Kylo fight and Rey kills Kylo. It didn’t really work for me though I’d have to watch again to figure out precisely why. This epic, wet fight just… wasn’t quite as epic as I expected it to be. Maybe it was because Finn was randomly there. Maybe it was because it didn’t have the dialogue from the trailer. Maybe it was because I was just tired of watching them fight and not seeing their relationship progress during the film when it had already progressed beyond this in TLJ. And she kills him like it’s a calculated thing when his guard is down and this whole thing is a mess. Now, it’s coming back to me! The order of events don’t make sense. The characterisation doesn’t make sense. 

Kylo and Rey are fighting. Leia gives her life force to communicate something to her son and dies in the process. I don’t quite understand what she’s doing and why this means she has to die. She’s not force projecting like Luke did. How is this different from in TLJ when she says “Ben” then and he waivers about killing her? She was fine after that! I get that they’re working with what they could for Leia but nevertheless, if you’re going to include it in an actual film, it’s still got to have internal consistency. Not that this film cares. Anyway, Leia dies to make Kylo pause and then Rey kills him which seems very rushed and kind of mean but whatever. Then Rey immediately uses Chekov’s healing to bring him back to life and when she does he’s Ben without a scar. So this is all confusing to me. Did Leia redeam him by saying “Ben”? Did she do anything else that makes sense of her dying? Did Rey killing Kylo bring Ben back? Was it Han’s memory? A combination of all these factors?

But the order strikes me as off. The death of Kylo Ren to allow Ben Solo to live is good. Excellent content. But all that is needed to do this is for Kylo to die – meaningfully (which being randomly stabbed by his lover at the moment when he was changing does not quite feel to me) and be brought back to life – meaningfully. I’m not saying what Rey did wasn’t impressive but I don’t remember being overawed by the music and the cinematography here. This is in many ways, or should be, the turning point in the entire ST: the moment when Ben Solo is reborn. And the exact moment of it happening is uncertain. And does he need the moment with Han’s memory afterwards? I’m not saying it wasn’t very touching to see Han and to have their moment together but it nevertheless didn’t quite gell. Like so many things in this film, it’s a nice moment that is over too quickly and doesn’t quite hang together with coherent plotting and characterisation. The entire sequence is rushed with too much happening – fight, Leia, death, healing, Han, lightsaber, RANDOM FINN etc. etc. And in fact, this moment that should be climactic is then later overshadowed by later Ben healing Rey in the same way, a completely narratalogically meaningless act. But more on that later. 

And I realise that in my hurry to get to this fight, I’ve forgotten Dark!Rey. Dark!Rey, like Rey Palpatine, is an idea that could and should be amazing and, apart from the cool graphics and a moment of gasp for effect, isn’t and fundamentally doesn’t work. Rey is struggling with her inner darkness throughout this film, something that was suggested in both TFA and TLJ, so I’m very much on board with it, and I think it’s important to see women on screen be angry and especially angry in a wild, ugly way. I think Daisy Ridley did a great job with that. But TROS attributed this anger and darkness to Palpatine rather that all the myriad and understandable reasons that Rey had for being angry. Perhaps that could work in some contexts as a metaphorical way of showing her anger but Palpatine is too present physically for that to stick. Instead, her characterisation is given wholesale to her genes and a male influence. This is… not great.

Confronting the dark part of one’s self is vitally important in the heroine’s journey. Only when the heroine has reconciled the dark parts of her psyche can the heroine be whole. TROS has worked out that this important but then hasn’t really known how to execute it. The physical manifestation of Dark!Rey for Light!Rey to fight is hellishly unsubtle and is also over so quick you quickly forget that she’s there. (Again, momentary effect is prioritised over anything that actually makes sense in terms of storytelling.) As a manifestation of Rey’s inner anger, she’s completely pointless. Rey fights her quickly but fighting Dark!Rey doesn’t result in Rey unifiying her dark impulses with her heroic self. She still has dark impulses throughout the film! In fact, she never succeeds in fully reconciling them. If defeating Dark!Rey had been a striking and climactic moment then that would work, but it doesn’t. She continues to fight Kylo straight afterwards and Kylo himself is in some respects (certainly in TLJ) a physical manifestation of what Rey fears and needs in herself. It is Kylo who is truly Rey’s dark double in TFA and TLJ. He tells her what she knows and cannot admit, forcing her to confront that in herself. He attracts her yet repels her. According to what is set up in TFA and TLJ, until Rey can both kill Kylo and reconcile with him, she is not conquering and reconciling with that part of herself. After all, they are two halves of one protagonist. But in TROS Kylo no longer seems to take that role, or not coherently. For example, he delivers information (“Rey, yer a Palpatine lol”) that she doesn’t in fact know. So it doesn’t work. And yet it also doesn’t work that Rey fights Dark!Rey and then immediately goes off and fights Kylo! One of those fights is redundant, perhaps both. If Dark!Rey had been a real character who does stuff, who tempts Kylo, who replaces Rey (Odile/Odette-like) then this would be meaningful. But she doesn’t. I know that some people are arguing that Rey in the subsequent fights is possessed by Dark!Rey but honestly? I did not see that in the film and I just do not think the film is sufficiently coherent to be that subtle about something that is such a major plot point! So she continues to struggle with darkness even after supposedly defeating Dark!Rey which is just nonsense in terms of mythology. She struggles all the way up to her confrontation with Palpatine. 

So let’s get to that. Look, I’m going to be completely honest here: I have no idea what was going on. Palpatine was rigged up on a crane on creepy evil villain life support, there was a giant jam jar filled with pickled Snoke heads, Rey was there, Ben showed up having thrown away one lightsaber but then found another two lightsabers (there were a lot of lightsabers, I couldn’t keep track of which was which and why they were significant), the Knights of Ren were there to do a soundcheck for their upcoming gig IDEK, Finn wasn’t there which made a change and Palpatine wanted Rey to kill him so she would become super powerful until he didn’t want her to kill him. He was tempting her and used the standard threat of “I’m going to destroy the universe unless you take on these super dangerous powers to stop me but if you do then you’ll be evil yourself mwhahaha”. I’m not sure really how that benefits him. Was his end-game plan to build up a massive Sith Empire for his darling granddaughter to rule, ignore her for years in favour of corrupting Ben Solo via some dude called Snoke and then reappear from nowhere in order to die again so she could rule? Because that’s a really, really flawed plan. Like, my cullender is less holey than that plan. I may have got this wrong. But before anyone jumps in to “Well, actually” me, my point is valid: I’m an intelligent viewer who spends plenty of time thinking about SW. If I couldn’t follow the main reveal plan in the climactic film of the ST, then… that is a flaw in the writing and conception. It shouldn’t be that difficult!

 Anyway, back to Rey. She is being tempted yet again (which she shouldn’t be by this point in the film or trilogy) and, briefly (though I’ve mostly given up on hope for this film by this point) I am engaged by her quandery. I think it would be really interested if she takes the power offered and fully embraces her Palpatine heritage – she becomes a Sith in order to save the lives of her friends! Perhaps Dark!Rey was just a warm up to seeing the real Rey transform into Dark!Rey. Then Ben has to save her! As she has saved him from being Kylo Ren, he will save her from being Dark!Rey! Balance. So I think that could be interesting and it raises some interesting moral questions about whether doing something bad for good reasons is ever justifiable. But of course Rey resists! Rey is not allowed to actually do anything bad in this movie! It’s infuriating! Rey is completely good. I think the message the film thinks it’s giving out is that Rey is more than her ancestry – that she is good despite being a Palpatine, that everyone has the power to move beyond their background. Unfortunately, that message was already there when she was Rey Nobody! And the actual message is that Rey is a static, pure character who despite apparently containing darkness is never in any way truly tempted by it or gives into it. Any narrative tension over whether she will succumb or do something interesting is very rapidly dismissed. Just as Chewie’s death is retconned and C-3PO gets his memory back. 

Anyway Ben arrives and they somehow have two lightsabers (???? whatever) and stand and face Palpatine and I think at this point we need to talk about how this is just waaaaay less impressive on every level than them facing Snoke in TLJ. There was tension there and uncertainty and when they fought together it was genuinely breathtaking and surprising. There was no surprise about Ben and Rey facing Palpatine together, but there was a tired feeling of “Oh look, we’ve got to face off against another creepy old man who wants to hold onto power for evil after his time is well over. Oh well, I guess if we have to…” If nothing else, this sums up the Millenial experience very well! Ultimately, not only is Palpatine a confusing final villain, he’s also a boring one. The Chancellor in the PT was interesting on a political level, the Emperor was truly creepy as a foil to Darth Vader in the OT, but this fossil on life-support is neither scary nor original nor even particularly threatening.

That’s the thing with escalating the threats continuously – it becomes meaningless. Making the Boss bigger and badder and threatening the Universe instead of the Galaxy doesn’t make the drama more exciting, it just makes it less believable. It looks very impressive to have the entire sky filled with ships and the threat of Palpatine destroying everything but it’s also ultimately meaningless. A massive threat just means a massive reset button or deus ex force lightning. Superhero movies are very guilty of this terrible storytelling, so is Doctor Who. First London faces an alien threat, then England, then the planet, then the Galaxy, then the Universe… and where do you go from there? The audience doesn’t care about the world at large, they only care about our plucky little heroes and their lives. If Palpatine had said “I have Finn and Poe and if you don’t take on these Sith powers I’m going to murder them” the effect would have been the same, maybe even better because Rey’s dilemma would have been even more personal. Hey, another interesting idea: “I have Ben. Only way to save him is to adopt Sith powers!” Anyway.

So this confrontation is yet another less impressive copy of the throne room scene in TLJ. The lore also gets confusing here. Ben and Rey are tortured which makes no sense because doesn’t Palpatine want Rey alive? Not sure what he’s trying to achieve here except it makes our heroes look powerless. Then Rey takes on the force lightning and does some snazzy special effects to win the war very easily. So easily that you feel no emotion whatsoever at how easily this massive army of ships is instantly wiped out. (Side point, but I’m guessing there were lots of people on those ships and Rey’s just killed them all? And considering we’ve just got an admittedly half-baked but still a plot about the defection of storm troopers, isn’t this just a bit concerning? But Rey can do no wrong and it’s all for the greater good because this is the Light Side of the Force and she is All The Jedi so I guess we’ll just pass over this casual genocide on the part of our heroine.) This seems to kill Rey despite Palpatine telling her to do it to get more power a few minutes earlier. No seriously, isn’t this what happens? I’m so confused. At which point Ben force heals her as she force heals him and whereas she was fine and dandy after doing it, it kills him.

Which… okay. Is a thing that happens. It’s hella inconsistent. And makes no sense. But okay, I mean, okay. I wasn’t even sad. I was just like “…right.” And fortunately the film immediately moves on and completely fails to acknowledge Ben’s existence while triumphant music plays. So that’s a thing.

Remember how I said at the beginning of this meandering dissertation that I was always aware of Ben dying being a possible ending but it was the execution that failed here? Right! Well, the thing is that every time a death happens in the context of a hero’s journey, it’s got to mean something. In a world where people can be resurrected and, uh, SW is very much that world (or it is in TROS), then you can’t just die for no reason! And neither Rey nor Ben’s deaths made sense. Rey absolutely needs an underworld journey as part of her heroine’s journey but her death near the end of the film does not fulfil that criterion. An underworld journey is a way for a heroine to shed part of her behind, to learn something, and to confront herself. The cave scene was Rey’s journey to the underworld. Arguably, the scene on Pasaana where she learned force healing was another type of katabasis. Heck, you can argue that when she finds the lightsaber in TFA it’s a katabasis or when she ships herself to Ben in a coffin it’s another. Like. Rey has lots of metaphorical underworld journeys. But when she dies at the end of TROS she has already reunited with Ben, she has no darkness in her that needs to be purged because she never waivered from the light and when she is brought back she is the same person she was before. Unlike Ben who comes back from the dead literally a different person. So Rey’s death makes no sense either in terms of the magical world and powers in play but also for her heroine’s journey. Maybe she could have collapsed. Maybe the effort should have drained her and Ben of their Force powers – a sacrifice for using powers they shouldn’t have touched. That would have made sense and would have been entirely fitting. But death? Nope.

And Ben’s death consequently makes no sense. Force healing has been established within the very same movie to have no real consequences on the user (also similarly established in The Mandalorian) so Ben’s death makes less sense than anything else in the entire film. The internal logic of the film says that there are no consequences for force healing. And then it kills off someone who does it. Sadness is not the reaction to that; confusion is. And then on a mythological level, Ben shouldn’t die. Kylo has already died. And Ben has been reborn!  I know it’s a meme, but Ben has done nothing wrong. Kylo has been punished for his actions and what is left is Ben. This is very, very clearly spelled out within the film. This makes Ben’s death a senseless tragedy that makes no sense, a final death in a film that has continually shown that death is not real or an ending. Except for Ben Solo. Because… I don’t know? I’ve managed to go 4812 words without mentioning redemption but I guess I can’t avoid it now. I’m actually not a big fan of redemption because it gets all thorny and becomes about morality and specifically Christian morality and I’m just… I’m tired of that. I’m a classicist and stories of classical mythology and classical heroism have nothing to do with redemption and being good and evil and I really see the Skywalkers as a kind of Greek tragedy lineage rather than people who have to be redeemed. I know Vader died changing his mind and killing the Emperor for his son but I don’t see that as redemption. That was a man who had done many awful things making a choice out of love at the very end of his life. And again, Ben saved Rey – this was an act of personal love and had nothing to do with the Galaxy. Redemption seems to be an active, ongoing thing that is about more than the purely personal. Vader wasn’t redeemed and neither was Ben – because he didn’t have a chance. And it all gets confused because, as I keep saying, Kylo Ren died!!!! On a mythical level, that’s all that’s needed! Ben Solo, on a mythic level, has nothing to prove, nothing to atone for, nothing for which he requires redemption. On the level that SW is also a story of politics, if Ben had lived, he would have had to reconcile his past actions as Kylo Ren with his present experience as Ben Solo – and it would have been fair if he had to pay a penalty in the human world. But not the death penalty. Because he has already paid that. Ben succeeds in reconciling and facing off his inner darkness in the way that Rey does not in this film. But he is then punished again and dies needlessly and shockingly in order to save Rey, who also shouldn’t have died.

It’s very unsatisfactory. On a mythic level, it really doesn’t make sense.

And I haven’t even mentioned the whole thing about if they are dyad (lol I keep reading this as dryad and getting a very weird set of mental images) or two halves of a protagonist or soulmates or whatever you want to call it where if one dies the bond just remains as a wound. This is a scenario where Rey and Ben have been very clearly set up as a pair animus/anima hero/heroine who belong together whether that is in life or death. I’ve just been reading about Brunnhild and Siegfried from the Nibelung Ring Saga – they both die at the end when they’ve finally been reunited but they are united in death. It’s sad but their death is inevitable after what’s happened to them and it’s sort of uplifting because they are together. This could definitely have worked for Rey and Ben. And considering death doesn’t stop you appearing multiple times and even doing cool stuff like lifting ships out of the sea, it wouldn’t even have been very sad. The mystical hero/heroine who cannot remain in society once their journey is complete is not uncommon. Look at Frodo going off with the Elves in a metaphor for death at the end of LotR where the more down-to-earth Sam is able to stay and rebuild. It would make total sense for Ben and Rey to be unable to integrate with society at the end of TROS whether that means simply exile or death. So long as they are together.

Anyway, they’re not together which makes the whole thing horribly unbalanced and unnervingly wrong on a profound level. The myth is broken! It simply does. not. work.

But if the ending for Ben and Reylo as a whole was disturbing, false, internally inconsistent and emotionally empty, that’s nothing to the ending Rey gets. Lots of people have already written about this so I’ll try to be brief. Rey has no connection to Tatooine. Rey is not allowed to grieve. Rey regresses to a childhood state, her very definite, spelled out future as a symbolic mother being absolutely aborted. Rey takes as a family name one that she has no personal connection. Rey is left with absent friends and nobody but the ghosts of Luke (who she didn’t like) and Leia to talk to in the role of weirdly incestuous sterile parents. So I guess this is a win for the Luke/Leia shippers?

Okay, I just need to rant a moment. (Yes, this is 5556 words of ranting but you’ve got this far – indulge me?) I’ve seen several takes from people I follow who aren’t Reylos saying that this is a great ending for Rey because she has a family and I’m just like ARE YOU EFFING SERIOUS?????? Are you ACTUALLY trying to tell me that living alone on a barren, desert planet reminiscent of where she lived as a child before she heard the call to adventure, where she was symbolically asleep with nobody but the GHOSTS OF SIBLINGS for company and ABSENT FRIENDS is FINDING A FAMILY???????????? JUST KILL HER ALREADY – she’s ALREADY DEAD!!!!! You want to make me feel Rey at the end even if Ben is dead? Show her surrounded by her found family in the Resistance and show her WORKING WITH CHILDREN?????????????? IT. WOULD. NOT. BE. HARD. TO. DO. THAT. AND. MAKE. IT. UPLIFTING. But this -this is just painful, truly painful and insulting. And don’t give me this crap that she’s not living there, she’s just there temporarily to bury the lightsabers and leave and go back to her friends. WHAT ABSOLUTE BULLSHIT. This is the ENDING of a NINE MOVIE SAGA. The ending matters???? And the ending is of Rey alone with the droid she rescued two movies back staring at some binary suns that only matter to the audience and not to her. THE FILM DOES NOT TELL US THAT SHE IS GOING TO LEAVE AND MEET HER FRIENDS. THE FILM DOES NOT TELL US THAT. IT DOES NOT IMPLY THAT. So this is a bloody stupid argument.

Yeah, I cracked. I don’t regret it. This is so infuriating I actually have literally nothing to say about “Rey Skywalker”. Like, whatever. The film’s already done its worse. Just… whatever. Who cares at this point? It’s meaningless. I laughed in despair at the cinema screen and was glad it was over.

 The fact is, according to the heroine’s journey, this isn’t the end of the story. It makes sense that within 24 hours of the film premiering, AO3 was filling up with “fix-it fics” where Rey goes to the World Between Worlds to get Ben back. Because that’s what heroines do. They save their loved ones. They do it patiently and through endurance. And they always succeed. And unlike heroes who go to the underworld to save their wives (cf Orpheus), heroines who go to get their man succeed. This story needs Rey, like Psyche, to go save Ben. She hasn’t finished her heroine’s journey. In fact, she is in many ways back where she started. Her attempts to integrate and confront her darkness have been confused and ultimately meaningless. She has not unified permanently with her lover yet. She has not become either a literal or symbolic mother. There is a stage in the heroine’s journey where she retreats to where she comes from for reflection and growth. That is acceptable. But that is not the ending!!!

And to place this ending of the film, with Rey smiling and saying “Rey Skywalker” as if this means something and some triumphant music over the top alongside what so many viewers feel instinctively, namely that the myth is incomplete and broken, leaves the audience – or at least it left me – feeling cheated and empty and bemused about why it feels so wrong. Ultimately Ben dead and Rey pregnant would make more narrative sense than the sterile and barren and infantilised ending we were given. And that was just about the worst case scenario of bad writing that we ever thought could happen. 

The myth is broken. Good night.

(Tune in soon to the much shorter Part Three where I discuss everything else that isn’t Reylo related that is wrong with this movie.)

Reylo - ABO fics

House of The Rising Sun by amybeegood

(Last updated April 17, 2020) 28 chapters

A canon-esque, Omegaverse, Reylo/Hades and Persephone version of the War of The Roses. But in space.

Reyne by itsjustsilver

(Last Updated March 29, 2020) 3 Chapters

The Princess Rey does not want to attract the Emperor’s interest.

Alternative Methods (of Pain Relief) by Camucia

(Last updated March 26, 2020) 10 chapters

Rey has never exactly had the most normal of reproductive health, and Jakku left her with the pain tolerance of a rancor. But even by her standards, the increasingly awful cramps that have plagued her these last few months are getting a bit... unmanageable. She’s perfectly content to do as she has always done for her entire life, gritting her teeth and soldiering through the pain - Too bad this is apparently Not An Option when these sensations are shared with a certain Supreme Leader.

Only his Queen by Lanie_cakes

(Last updated March 26, 2020) 16 chapters

Rey world is turned upside down when she turns 27 when her suppressed shapeshifter gene is unlocked when she goes into Heat. She is shipped off to a place called the First Order to relearn about her origins and has a hard time adjusting in this new world she dubbed as the Fuzzy Kingdom of Nudity. A year into waiting for her alpha Mate to come to her and unlock her inner animal from its cage. She is shocked to find that she not going to mated to just any regular Alpha...But the King of the Wild People Himself.

Naboo by Sweetaro

(Last updated Dec 29, 2019) 4 chapters

Naboo was supposed to be a paradise. A way for Rey to get away from society while she waits for Poe. Getting the invite to go to Naboo, a closed society where Alphas and Omegas get along. Where everything looks perfect. Too perfect. And is it just Rey or do all of the Omegas act weird? They all cling to Alpha males, and talk only about pups and homemaking, how great their alpha husbands are, and just how much Naboo is perfect. Nothing seems right, and Rey is starting to get uncomfortable with how the town keeps asking her when she and the reclusive Ben Solo are going to get married and be the same. And the fact that he sounds so assured when agreeing with them. Something is going on, but is Rey going to get out in time before she has some of the Kool-Aid?

The Late Bloomer by JJJJ12

(Last updated Feb 17, 2020) 10 chapters

Rey and Ben have been friends since they could walk and have avoided any tension in their relationship for a simple reason—Ben is an Alpha and Rey is a Beta. But, when Rey unexpectedly presents as an Omega almost a decade after she’s supposed to, the best friends must figure out how to ignore the attraction that’s always been there for the sake of preserving their friendship.

Ambrosial by devdevlin

(Last updated Feb 13, 2020) 6 chapters

Somewhere in the Calvary, there's an Alpha who smells like heaven.

Tinker Tailor Soldier Sailor Rich Man Poor Man Beggar Man Thief by KiraStar

(Last updated Nov 18, 2019) 4 chapters

"My father bought you for 20 pounds and a plot of land not fit enough for a cow to graze upon." At 17, Rey is forced into an arranged marriage with Kylo Ren, the adopted son of a wealthy lord, in order to produce an heir. Lady Macbeth AU

Heat In Your Gaze by Chibirini1

(Last updated Nov 17, 2019) 19 chapters

When Rey, a feisty omega, wanders too far into the forest and starts her first heat, she is found by none other than Kylo Ren, an alpha with a secret. Will he be able to break against his clan's expectations to be with Rey? Or will she return to her lonely life once more?

Explosive Chemistry by MizuPhoenix

(Last updated Sep 28, 2019) 10 chapters

As far as Rey's concerned, her boss can blow an aneurysm. Kylo Ren, more like the big bad wolf, with all his huffing and puffing. Nevermind that he's drop-dead gorgeous, he was an Alpha. Rey had dealt with enough Alpha's to know that her adoptive brother was the only one she would tolerate. At least she was lucky enough to not be born an Omega. No, Rey would not be bending over for her boss or any other posturing Alpha male. Except... that little voice in the back of her head keeps growing louder, and her body has started to ache whenever the overwhelming (insufferable) man is not around. Then there are the urges, probably just sexual frustration, but they are all clamoring for her asshole boss' attention. Rey just wanted a nice normal life. With Kylo Ren in the mix that dream has shattered. Needless to say, their interactions have the chemical reagents necessary for explosive reactions.

Gravitation by CaraRose

(Last updated Jan 31, 2019) 7 chapters

Modern A/B/O. Rey Johnson is an eighteen year old Omega who's asshole "stepfather" Plutt is pocketing her grant money meant to help her pay for college. The archaic laws that say an Omega isn't of legal age until they're twenty one is leaving her stuck with little recourse as how to get away from Plutt so she can get her education. Kylo Ren is an alpha, and one of the top enforcers in the First Order, a crime syndicate run by the shadowy "Supreme Leader" Snoke. The two live lives that are worlds apart, but events are in motion that will send them on a collision course neither of them is ready for.

Dark Woods and Daffodils by Austere_Ahhhnie

(Last updated Nov 28, 2018) 3 chapters

Across the bloodied battlefield, a young Omega on the cusp of womanhood catches the eye of an enemy Alpha on the ascent of his power.

Winter's Cage by Nelsbels

(Last updated April 16, 2018) 5 chapters

The reason why the historians called it the era of the Dark Ages is because the scholars had limited knowledge about this period of time due to the scarce records left behind. It was an Age of the rising Leviathans, a race of ancient and primordial monsters that walked this earth unchallenged. During the Dark Ages the Lycans fought a vicious war for their freedom from their masters and enslaves, the Nosferatu. For many generations the bloody conflict ravaged the lands with no end in sight. An elusive Lycan by the alias of the White Ghost stands defiant against the Nosferatu. Kylo Ren will stop at nothing to end the uprising and put down the said Werewolf. However, things change once they finally come face to face and consequently the scales of the war start to tip.

Misbehaving For Days by t0bemadeofglass

*Finished* 18 chapters

Rey’s experience with Demi-Humans is about as limited as her experience with snow, that is to say: horrendously minimal, given that she’s just moved to Coruscant with no intention of returning to the hell hole of a desert she scraped herself from. Easing herself into the lifestream of a city that demands assimilation to the rigors and confines of a bustling metropolitan was never going to be easy, but throw in a one-night stand with a tall, brick house of a man that doesn’t seem keen on leaving it at one night, and any hopes Rey had for an easy transition got blown to high heaven.

Knot an Omega by SkywalkerSince1980

(Last updated May 22, 2020) 4 chapters

How would A/B/O society have developed over the past 15,000 years, and what would it be like in modern-times? How would Rey, Kylo, and the crew handle it? What is the A/B/O backstory, and how did it develop into modern times? Plenty of (semi-fictional) ancient history mixed in with the story, and plenty of smut down the line. Rose is a badass. Rey has a bad decade. HEA, but not the way you think.

Labyrinth - a Reylo Book Of Sins Re Write by RayofDawn

*Finished* 5 chapters

A retelling of a childhood favorite but with a sinful reylo twist

Knots in the Heart by Anonymous

(Last updated July 2, 2018) 2 chapters

Kylo’s determines to keep his prisoner.

Catacombs by monsterleadmehome

*Finished* One Shot

Kylo Ren is the oldest living alpha vampire. He has been chasing his omega, Rey, for centuries. Ever since the night he turned her, he’s wanted her for his own. Will she finally let herself be claimed or doom herself to a worse fate?

No One But You by faequeentitania

*Finished* 5 chapters

When he scented her on the wind, his entire world ground to a halt. It was primal, it pulled at something in his guts like a hook, and everything- the droid, the map, Skywalker- all became secondary to her. Her. The girl. His mate.

The Mating Service by AlbaStarGazer

*Finished* 36 chapters

'If Rey had known how quickly she would find her biological mate and alpha through the world wide mating service, 'Match,' she might have considered signing up years ago.' A sceptic of the leading mate finding service, Rey decides to sign up after too much wine and years of loneliness. She never expected to find her match within days of submitting her samples. Join the two as they are separated by an ocean, Rey in England, Ben in America as they explore their situation. Can Ben convince Rey that he wants his omega for her and not simply their biology and change her mind about the reliability of the mating service?

Vanilla Jasmine Dreams by Trulyurs

(Last updated May 30, 2018) 4 chapters

Rey is a young research assistent hoping to learn from the best, so when she is hired by Luke Skywalker she is hopeful. What she didn't exspect was Ben Solo. An alpha that seems to shutter at the sight of her. He is loud and harsh, one of the harder alphas she has incountered, and she is horribly attracted to him. What Rey doesn't know is that Dr.Solo is hidding a secret.

Until you by Ever-so-reylo (Ever_So_Reylo)

*Finished* One Shot

Kylo looks at her, and he smells her, and he thinks, Fuck. He thinks, Yes. He thinks, I didn’t know. I couldn’t have known. And he says: ”You should watch your right side.”

Finding Home by JaneEyre1847

*Finished* One Shot

Can therapist Ahsoka Tano and a lot of resentful pondering prepare Ben for the terrible secret Rey is ready to reveal?

Dark Nights by Polkadotdotdot

*Finished* 27 chapters

"Cause I need a man, a man who has blood on his hands and the truth on his face," Rey is broke.Trying out for a second job to solve her mounting debts, Rey has a chance encounter with an Alpha by the name of Kylo Ren who makes her an offer she just doesn't want to refuse. Little did she know how her choice would pull her into the underworld of New York crime.

Hotter than Hell by slxtforbangtanboys

(Last updated May 3, 2018) 1 chapter

They went by many names. The Light, and The Dark. Rey and Kylo - But on days that he's feeling generous, Rey and Ben. The Jedi and the Jedi Killer, fated to be.

Heartstring by Oh_Snapcrackle

(Last updated Sep 9, 2018) 13 chapters

“Did you just smell me?” The girl accuses, craning her neck to meet his stare. Her eyes are wide with shock and weariness. Hazel eyes. Warm eyes that look like they have lived a thousand lives. Breathed a thousand deaths. Soulful eyes. His cheeks color, and he realizes he is blushing. And he never blushes. Not since he was a little boy. But he is blushing now from embarrassment and the fact he did just get caught trying to catch her scent. “No, sorry. I was just sniffling. Got a cold.” Every demon is connected to an angel by a heartstring. Ben just found his. In this world where angels and demons live among humans, balance is kept through the mysterious mating bonds between creatures of light and dark. Where there is darkness, the light will rise to meet it. Or so it used to be. Angels are too rare these days. And even if a demon finds their mate, keeping them safe is impossible.

Court You, I Shall. by LadyErica

(Last updated Dec 10, 2018) 3 chapters

A fair maiden Omega from Jakku is doing her mistress's errands when she meets the Alpha Lord from Cornelia while he is on a hunting trip. Their eyes meet and though the maiden refuse because of her background and upbringing. The Lord refuses to give up. His mother always howls him for not finding a mate and settle down with pups already, but in this Omega he just met. He believes he has found his mate that will birth his heirs. He will do anything even court her if he must.

That's Enough! by SithLord98

(Last updated Aug 27, 2018) 4 chapters

After a deadly virus caused by the overuse of suppressants that nearly wiped out omegas in 2449, federal laws were put into place to preserve and protect them. These laws are highly oppressive in nature for them, requiring omegas to register if they have not been claimed by 18. Rey Marek and Tatum Rax are two betas and former foster sisters trying to heal after living a rather traumatic childhood. Rey accepts a mathematics teaching position at Resistance Academy, one of the last omega secondary schools in the U.S., located within the D.C. Metro area next to First Order Academy – an exclusive alpha secondary school founded and financed by the Skywalker and Palpatine families. Tatum is the school librarian, which makes the situation even more convenient for her. Kylo Ren and his friend Armitage Hux have been asked to oversee in the merging of the two schools. After a prescription recall on suppressants, Rey and Tatum both realize that they are omegas that haven't presented, but opt to take the risk and not report this in hopes that the suppressants will kick back in again soon. Everything is fine until they meet Kylo and Armitage during a transition visit at Resistance Academy that everything goes to shit for them…

So yours, So mine by Anonymous

*Finished* One Shot

“Where is she?” He asks impatiently. Hux nods and walks quickly, but he hesitates for a moment when they take a different corridor from the prison cells, his question is quickly answered by Hux. “We had to separate several of them due to their condition.”“Condition?” His impatient voice distorts behind his mask. "Yes ... several of the omegas got heat during the trip, so they were separated from the others ..."

Clan by moonstone88

*Finished* 14 chapters

Wars between clans were normal, but what happens when that war is between two who love each other. Rey knew she shouldn't have bent to Kylo as her Alpha, but she had no idea what their fleating connection would do and the pieces she would be left to pick up. Can Kylo overcome the years of hatred he holds in his heart for a clan that forced him away from the love of his life, and is trying to snatch her from his grasp once more.

Second Heat by UmpBumpFizz

*Finished* 4 chapters

"Stay right there." She stilled instantly. Her eyes settled on his outstretched hand, her breathing shallow and rapid. "You're alright... You're alright. I've got you." She blinked as she felt the warmth of his hand as he gently caressed her face. His voice... God, his voice was like silk. Safe? "I've got you. You're safe." She drew in and let out a long, shuddering breath as the scent from the gland on his wrist hit her nose, calming her instantly. Safe.

Feral by Hormonal_Trashbag

*Finished* One Shot

Snow began its idle descent from above the line of barren trees, filtering to the frozen forest floor in fat flakes. Despite the turn of weather, Rey remained focused on the pair of long ears ducking behind the nearby brush. Her fingers trembled as she nocked an arrow in the string of her bow but she ignored the cold as she prepared to take her shot. If she was like any other omega, she would be sequestered in the warmth of her den right now, heavy with pups and waiting for her alpha to return from the hunt. But Rey hadn’t gone into heat with the shift from autumn to winter like she was supposed to. The alphas of her pack had turned their noses from her in disgust when her scent didn’t sharpen with mating pheromones. What’s wrong with her? They would ask themselves and Rey had no answer.

FRACTURE by succubusybody

*Finished* One Shot

Rey's older brother Ben has been head of the household ever since their parents died when she was young. When her first heat comes, he'll take good care of her.

Swell by Hormonal_Trashbag

(Lqst updated June 17, 2019) 4 chapters

She knew that some omegas ignored the archaic pull to be mated. There was some debate over how voluntary an omega’s participation in mating could be, though she knew many of those that argued against it were betas that had never experienced a heat to begin with. What could they possibly know? There was always a choice. Rey couldn’t help being practical about it. If she ignored her biological call, she would spend a long week throbbing, writhing with a need to be filled. She’d have to skip work for a few days at the very least. It was just...easier to give in.

Gonna Get Myself Connected

The Birds and The Bees by TourmalineGreen

*Finished* 9 chapters, One Shot

Who understands Alphas, anyway; they’re mysteries, wrapped in enigmas, dusted with hormones and deep-fried in a vat of unquenchable rage. And Ben, he’s a classic, textbook example. Rey doesn’t need his intensity in her life. Rey was quite happy to steer clear of him, as long as he wants to be like… well, like that. And he’d been like that ever since she hired on. Always testy around her, always scowling, stomping, difficult. But he produced excellent code, so… maybe management was sympathetic. Then again, maybe he just had someone’s incriminating photographs, and was holding them over their heads, who knew. OR: Ben Solo: Wunderkind developer, office Alpha, noted cantankerous asshole, gets stuck in an elevator with Rey Johnson: New hire, ray of literal sunshine, progressive Omega who seriously does not have time for this.

Ben will never ever be able to forget the first, squalling sight of his son. Black-haired—so much hair—and red-faced, yelling in a way that had made the midwives remark about ‘healthy Alpha lungs!’ Ben hadn’t exactly hoped to have an Alpha son, but he hadn’t not hoped, either. It was familiar to him, and his own experience, although he knew that his son would have his own life. Hopefully a less-anxious, less-awkward time of it than Ben had… but, judging by the expression on his son’s face, Ben knows that something is very definitely up.

Run Cried the Crawling by succubusybody

*Finished* 4 chapters

Rey is mated by force during a day trip to Amish country. When her heat comes around, she is charged with abandoning her mate and forced to return to the home of the man who ruined her life.

abash the little bird by SecretReyloTrash (BadOldWest)

*Finished* 5 chapters

Ben Solo has a pretty easy time of fighting his Alpha instincts with the right cocktail of suppressants and bad attitude. However, some old wive's tales about the moon or the position of the stars may have knocked this mating cycle way out of wack for a lot of Alphas and Omegas; making them desperate to attract a mate. He may have had an easy time fighting his instincts before, but his body has other plans. Especially when it starts sprouting some truly impressive plumage to attract the right Omega. At least it catches Rey's eye. AKA Kylo gets a freakin' TAIL.

Hallowed Heat by gopherbroke

(Last updated Nov 4, 2018) 3 chapters

As the steady babysitter, Rey is accompanying Mr. Solo and his son, Grey, to the city's big Halloween Fest. It is a little too late when she realizes that she had broken Mr. Solo's rigid contract and had forgotten her supressants. She flees, hiding in the portapotty as she starts to go into heat. While Mr. Solo paces, impatient and bossy, on the other side of the thin plastic door, Rey looks back on her relationship with her boss and how he has changed from hostile employer to friend... to Alpha? But would he ever be her Alpha? And how long will that flimsy door hold back Alpha like Mr. Solo from an Omega that smells as sweet as Rey?... Grey had always said how much his father had a sweet tooth.

The Ballad of You, Me, and Everything in Between

The House on Prairie Corners by bluetoast

*Finished* 3 chapters, 5 chapters

Alpha Ben Solo just wanted to get to his new job in Yellowstone National Park by the weekend. He'd had it planned out - get through the major cities outside of rush hours, be there and settled by Saturday. Pretty easy, considering most traffic was headed east, to Woodstock. That was before an omega named Rey Johnson tapped on the window of his Volkswagen bus in some spit in the dirt town in Ohio asking for a ride.

It's been 5 months since Rey and Ben met and became mates, and they have only grown closer since that time. As a mid December blizzard sweeps into Yellowstone, the weather is the last thing on either of the minds. As Rey's next heat and Ben's rut are about to align, they only have one plan while they're snowed in. Start a family.

Shivers by AlbaStarGazer

*Finished* 3 chapters

Alphas have been illegal for decades due to their thirst for power and destructive tendencies. They are housed in institutions, prisons and state hospitals and away from the general population that consists of omegas and betas. Writer and omega Rey comes across an unconscious man outside of her secluded cabin. She realises too late he is an alpha.

End of the Republic & Freedom by SithLord98

*Finished* 8 chapters

Unknownbeknognst to them, Rey, Tarren, Rose, and Paige were marked as soul mates to four men who have lived dangerous, powerful and privileged lives, but have been sad because they believed their soul mates were dead. The girls have been raised under the noses of the Plutt brothers this whole time, to avenge for Maz's death. On Rey's 18th birthday, the guys discover the truth and kidnap the girls. How will they manage to survive unscathed, as they are now confined with them in one of their manors in the middle of nowhere, while the men go into strong ruts, causing them to go into heat...

Camping by Anonymous

*Finished* 6 chapters

Rey’s sweet alpha boyfriend takes her camping to celebrate their one year anniversary. But Rey gets lost in the woods before they can celebrate. Another alpha finds her first and he will take what he wants. *Rey is technically of legal age of consent, but she’s still just a teenager, so I’m tagging it underage. Rey is 16 and Kylo is 26*

The End Of The Beginning by Fearthefaithful

*Finished* One Shot

As her scent infiltrated my senses I could focus on nothing else. I watched her as she floated by across the hall. She seemed to be too preoccupied with her friends to notice me but I couldn’t take my eyes off of her. It had been months since I’d seen her and that was before she presented. Now she was fully an omega and I felt all the anger and frustration that had built over the past 10 years was coming to fruition. This time she was mine and I wasn’t letting anyone, not even my mother disuade me from that.

May The Guac Be With You by PiscesSiren

*Finished* 13 chapters

Rey has been doing fine on her own for years. Her job isn’t fulfilling but it keeps her fed. Her house isn't perfect but it keeps her safe. But after a few things start to change, she slowly starts to realize that she wants more out of her life and maybe even... herself. Also, what the hell is up with that hot customer who says she smells obscene? Rude.

Little Thieves by ohwise1ne

(Last updated March 15, 2019) 17 chapters

"If you come out now, Omega, I'll make this easy for you." His voice carries clearly through the house, and it's almost as sinful as the smell of him, suffocating her as she shrinks back against the wall of his closet. “Or maybe… you don’t want this to be easy.” A pause. “Yes. Oh, yes. I can smell it on you. You can’t hide from me.” Rey breaks into the wrong house. Kylo Ren catches her in the act.

not because you need me to by starkylosolo

*Finished* 2 chapters

Rey just got hired at her dream job, cardiology, when she meets Ben who needs a favor from her. It's just that she didn't expect Ben from nephrology to be so... big, and so alpha. She certainly didn't expect him to smell so nice. Maybe she can ignore the way he affects her, but then he opens his mouth.

Stay the Course by aduirne

(Last updated March 4, 2019) 10 chapters

Rey is in her second year at university on a full scholarship as a forensic science major. She plans on working for the FBI one day. She had no plans of letting anyting or anyone gettig her off track. She has no time for alpha/omega drama. Her job at the campus library suits her well since it gives her lots of time to be alone in the old, ornate building she had grown to love. Everything is going rather well for her until one night when she scents someone that makes her pause. She does the only logical thing. She runs like hell.

I Seek My Freedom in the Moonlight by asongforjonsa

(Last updated March 2, 2019) 26 chapters

Rey moves to Chandrila with her step-mom and step-sister. Neither of them know the real reason why she goes for runs on full moons: she's a werewolf. On the first full moon in Chandrila, she runs into a huge black wolf: Kylo Ren. And he has news that will rock her foundation...

A Poetic Match by commandercrouton

*Finished* 2 chapters

It didn’t matter who was here at the moment. The only thing Rey could focus on was that scent. Her wide hazel eyes circled the room as she tried to see the one who was emitting those delectable pheromones. How was no one else in this room reacting? The smell was making her crazy, and she dug her nails into her skin. She would know this scent anywhere. She found him frozen by the podium, staring at her with the same look she knew she was giving him. She felt her thighs clench in anticipation as memories of their last, and only, time together filled her brain. “Rey, is everything okay? Your scent...shifted,” Poe inquired tentatively. “What?” she asked, not willing to take her eyes off the man in front of the room. “Why is Professor Solo staring at you like you killed his pet cat?” At this statement, Rey looked at Poe, realization dawning on her. No, not this, anything but this. This wasn’t a professor. He was something entirely different to her. Alpha.

Your Pretty Little Heart

A Perfectly Good Heart

And corgi makes five by Ever-so-reylo (Ever_So_Reylo)

*Finished* 15 chapters, 3 chapters, One Shot

“Good. Good little Omega.” He says the words against her gland, almost sweetly, and Rey—Rey is going to die. A wonderful, delicious death. Depraved, all of this. Filthy. Beautiful.

It’s physically painful, to be near her. And not to be, too. (Your Pretty Little Heart in Ben's POV)

It’s not about the dog, not really. It’s the name on the plate. Rey gasps. Ben almost recoils. Because there is no way that someone thought it would be a good idea to name a dog—“… Leia Corgana?” Rey’s fingers press against her lips. She is smiling. Then grinning. Then trying not to laugh. Then inevitably failing.

Algorithms by greyorchids

(Last updated Jan 27, 2020) 12 chapters

I run out to the lobby, grabbing my tablet and try to remain cool in the face of Satan in a Suit. “Mr. Ren, how can I help you?” He’s taller and more broad than pictures can translate. His black on black suit seems menacing, not a coincidence, I am sure. He seems a bit taken aback, something I am used to in this male-dominated profession. When most of the employees here come for help with their computers or experience network issues, they don’t expect me to know how to solve their problems. Challenging stereotypes one satisfied customer at a time. He breathes in deep and pauses before he speaks. I think I see the flash of recognition in his eyes but I keep my body still and my face impassive. Yeah, I am an omega, Ren. Get over it. Rey works in the IT Department for a tech company that is recovering from a recent hostile takeover. Ever at odds with the universe, Rey continues to live against the grain by excelling in a male driven industry and by redefining what it means to be omega.

Call You Mine by lovingreylo (PeaceBlessingsPeyton)

(Last updated July 25, 2019) 2 chapters

"The first day he saw her was like an out of body experience. He always felt completely silly when he thought back on it, how he had literally felt time slow or how the world that day seemed to have an extra sparkle to it. Ben sighed again before getting out of the car and heading up the walkway to his parent's house thinking about the day Rey Johnson had come into his life three months ago. How the alpha in him was immediately alarmed at how pale and malnourished she looked, how he just wanted to take care of her, how her smile and the way she laughed at his stupid jokes made his heart want to break out of his chest and offer itself to her." Even though he’s never been in love before, Ben Solo could easily tell you that he’s falling in love with Rey, the girl his parents had taken in off the street. There’s one small problem though, his father tells him that he isn’t good enough for her and to stay away. It works… for a short while anyway.

beyond the fields of wrongdoing and rightdoing (i'll meet you there) by black_facade

(Last updated Sep 23, 2019) 5 chapters

Rey has been a scavenger throughout her life in Jakku. When a dark figure suddenly came into her life, insisting that she was his mate, what could've gone wrong? Especially when it turns out that he was an Emperor and a Prime Alpha. "Lovers are patient and know that the moon needs time to become full." ***An Arabian Steampunk AU. With a dash of Omegaverse.

slake. by MalevolentReverie

*Finished* 8 chapters

It's normal for an opposite-designation parent to help their teenager through heat or rut, so why is it so hard for Rey and her widowed father, Ben?

The Hunt by commandercrouton

*Finished* 2 chapters

“Mortals tell the legend of Romulus and Remus, known as demigods who helped create the country of Rome. They were not demigods, but warlocks born to a powerful witch. She was hunted down and destroyed, but not before she begged for protection for her children. Her familiar, Lupa, transformed into a wolf granting her wish. She fed her witch’s children from her breast, creating the first Alpha and Omega in our world. All of us are descendants from those warlocks. Although magic has dwindled in our bloodlines, there are some who still possess it. And those people are us. I invite my omega brothers and sisters, on this rare Blood Moon, to celebrate our designation, and the familiar Lupa, who created us,” she pauses, raising her goblet above her head, signaling for her coven to follow her lead. “Tonight we will mingle with our neighboring Alpha coven. You will meet one another and choose your hunted during The Matching. Remember to save your carnal desires for the forest. To Lupercalia, the festival of the wolves!”

Territory by EdenMiasma

(Last updated June 16, 2019) 1 chapter

Growing up under Ben Solos wing was safe, comfortable, like nothing could ever hurt them. But Rey has to learn her place amongst her peers, and when everyone begins to present things just seem to get harder.

Honeysuckle by LBellicose

*Finished* 18 chapters

For 33 years Dr. Ben Solo has lived as a beta, he was the unlikely child of two Alphas. His life got turned inside out and upside down the day he met Rey, young omega that had been struck by a car and was bleeding out in his emergency room.

You'll Hear Me Howling (Outside Your Door) by HarpiaHarpyja

*Finished* 11 chapters

Father Ben Solo has been a priest at St. Ailbe's parish for the last year. It's a position that provides the structure and control he lacked in his youth, and maybe best of all, a way to wrangle his more unsavory urges as an Alpha. Rey Stafford has just moved to Ontario, hoping to advance at work and adjust to a new life across the Atlantic as an Omega living alone. When an unusual encounter in the confessional leaves them spiraling into a constant routine of advance and retreat, they both begin to struggle against their own baser urges and the ticking time bomb of years of repression.

Some Kind of Trouble by HopelesslyReylo

(Last updated July 16, 2019) 3 chapters

Going into heat, in the middle of the grocery store wasn’t Reys idea of a good time. Things get even more complicated when Ben offers to see her through her heat.

Mating Systems, Reproductive Success, and Sexual Selection in Secretive Species: A Case Study of the Wild Ahch-To Omega by NewerConstellations

(Last updated Feb 22, 2020) 21 chapters

For generations, Omegas have adapted to civilized environments, permanently impacting the expression of their DNA and pheromones. When a group of lost fisherman discovered an isolated population of feral Omegas on the remote island of Ahch-To, it offered a unique and precious opportunity to document their behavior in the wild. Research biologist Dr. Benjamin Solo spent a year living amongst the herd of Ahch-To Omegas and recorded his experiences, particularly his interactions with the Omega subject known as “Rey.” These are his findings.

Let’s See How Far We’ve Come by Fearthefaithful

(Last updated July 5, 2019) 12 chapters

Ben Solo was always angry. Chalk it up to his over active alpha tendencies, or his shitty childhood, but he was always angry. And when Rey walked into his life, it was like gasoline to a fire. She was an annoying little omega who always put him in his place. But now it’s been years, and he’s a raging alpha, and she’s the best thing he’s ever smelt in his life. And all the years of trying to protect her like a sister seem a little different now.

Forbidden Love by LadyErica

(Last updated Sep 20, 2019) 12 chapters

A/O/B modern world Alternate Universe Ben and Rey are siblings. Ben is an Alpha and Rey Omega. Ben has a desire. A wrong desire. After his sister had her first heat at fourteen when she gets her first period. Ben couldn't stop thinking about her. Desire turns to lust. Lust to love. It's forbidden. He was caught with her in away siblings shouldn't be. He is sent to asylum for others like him for his own good.

Lasso by ReyloRobyn2011

*Finished* 11 chapters

Western ABO because who doesn't love some Outlaw Alpha Kylo Ren?

We only live once by P_Dunton

*Finished* 16 chapters

Betrayed by her best friend and boyfriend, Omega Rey finds herself friendless and homeless for the first time in years. Thank god for her amazing boss, Maz who lets her crash above the auto repair shop where she works. Sad and lonely, Rey lets herself be talked into paying the First Order to locate a compatible Alpha Mate for her. As if her year didn’t already suck, of course she would match with the famous Kylo Ren, second in command of the most powerful suppressant production company in the country.

More Than This by LadySansasDirewolf

(Last updated July 1, 2019) 7 chapters

"Ben Solo?""Yes?"The woman slapped the documents into my hand so hard it stung. "Consider yourself served!"...In which Ben and Rey are soulmates who cannot seem to get on the same page.

Oathbreaker by Angelic_Hellraiser

(Last updated Sep 14, 2019) 7 chapters

"Claim me." she whispers, her words hard and final. He shakes his head, angered. "And kill us both? No." Stepping closer, she repeats the words in the high speech of her elvish tongue, voice low and chest brushing against his heavy cuirass. "Garo im, hîr o hûn-nín."

Expect the Unexpected by Arynn

(Last updated Jan 19, 2020) 2 chapters

Rey Ando is working for a legal company that fights for fair treatment and equality within the Alpha/Omega and Beta circles. However, little does anyone else know that she wants to be treated as an Omega submissive like the old days. Things change when she finally meets the mysterious owner of the company she works for, Ben Solo.

Quatervois by Poaxath

(Last updated Sep 12, 2019) 2 chapters

The north and the south have been at war for decades, a never-ending struggle between two sides that will never see eye to eye. In an attempt to negotiate and bring peace to a land ravaged by war, Rey departs on a quest to see if she can somehow help in that endeavour. It may be more than she bargained for, in the form of a marriage to The Dragon King - Kylo Ren.

Seasons of Love by Daisyflo

*Finished* One Shot

After his grandmother's death, Ben discovers he inherited her house. First problem: he isn't the only one. Second problem: his new housemate is an Omega.

No place like home. by HisAngel910

*Finished* 14 chapters

Rey Sanders has worked her entire life to fight against the stereotypes of traditional Omega's. Her design and renovation company helps to build the dream homes of all of her clients. Can she help her newest client Kylo Ren build his dream home? And can she do it before his Alpha drives her wild?

the dreadful need in the devotee by redbelles

*Finished* One Shot

God’s bones, what is happening? He’s smelled heat-scent before, but it’s never affected him like this. Never made him want to rip his armor off so he can feel the omega’s skin against his, never filled him with the visceral need to bite— The thought is like ice water pouring down his spine; it cuts through the haze of heat-scent like a knife, leaving a brutal clarity in its wake. The only omega on this godforsaken journey is the princess. En route to her betrothed and surrounded by a cadre of the realm’s fiercest alphas, the emperor’s granddaughter is going into heat.

Refuse Me by Autonomee

(Last updated Sep 4, 2019) 4 chapters

It’s the most contact she’s received in years, since her Grandpa was still alive. This Alpha’s touch is electric, completely unfamiliar but just what she needs. Her eyes automatically find his, they are molten brown, and everything in her wants to examine those eyes forever and- What am I doing? some sensible part of her screams at herself. Whatever he bids, another part answers. Rey’s plan to live her life to the fullest as an Alpha falls apart when a classmate discovers her secret.

Unbonded, Unbroken by Spiegatrix_Lestrange

(Last updated Nov 26, 2019) 6 chapters

Alderaan city is facing a new, disturbing threat. A powerful crime cartel is kidnapping Omegas, keeping them as prisoners for unspeakable, revolting reasons the local police need to investigate further. Detective Ben Solo goes undercover as Kylo Ren, determined to dismantle the cartel from the inside, but there's a requirement he must fit if he wants to gain the cartel's trust: he must bring an Omega as an offer to the organization. Rey Niima is a young, promising agent who knows exactly how hard an Omega's life can be. When the opportunity occurs to give her contribution to saving her fellow Omegas from the cartel's grasp, she volunteers immediately, determined to help Detective Solo with any means necessary.

Mine by assortedfruitsnacks212

(Last updated Sep 3, 2019) 3 chapters

The duel between Kylo and Finn in the snow, reframed as a fight over Omega Rey. It’s sexy. The end. Then Kylo whisks Rey away from Starkiller Base. Cue SMUTTY SMUT SMUT with MINIMAL PLOT. Marked "dubcon" because TFA Kylo isn't a gentleman...yet.

A good brother by Anonymous

*Finished* One Shot

Ben is home alone with Rey, taking care of his little sister as the good brother he is. Everything goes as usual on a Saturday night, oh at least that is what Ben thinks, until Rey is going into preheat…

Blow your smoke to fog up the mirror (write our name in hearts) by reygrets

(Last updated Sep 3, 2019) 9 chapters

Of course, this lecture is on the opposite side of the spacious campus, and she’s practically running from the titillating two-hour long Thermodynamics class. It was an introductory session, mostly that ‘get to know you’ crap and going over the syllabus, but the content she saw listed was a high that would carry her through anything--- even classic lit with Professor Solo. Or so Rey had thought, trying to slip into the lecture-hall without drawing too much attention. Unfortunately for Rey, the doors are heavy, old, and they slam even when you try to shut them gently. The man standing at the head of the class stares her down, and oh no. Rey's hot teacher (who probably already hates her) is an Alpha.

A Tale of Tooth and Claw

A Tale of Monsters and Legends by Khawapashi

*Finished* (Last updated Nov 24, 2019) 32 chapters, 30 chapters

Rey experiences her first heat in the middle of a crowded convention and is rescued by a dashing, dark-haired stranger. Kylo takes things too fast, because he's an intense, emotional idiot. The Knights of Ren are fun, especially Kylo's most loyal 'Knight'. Hux is the devil as always. The Skywalker-Organa-Solo family drama is... complicated.

“What the fuck, Argent, Rey is in heat -" The phone slid suddenly from his boneless grip, and Rey gathered herself up on her knees, fingers quickly working open the leather fastenings keeping her gagged. Kylo fell to his knees and she was there, wrapping herself around him from behind, murmuring nonsense words to calm him. “He’s back," he whispered. “Luke Skywalker."

Post: Part 1

The Rise of Skywalker thoughts, part 2

Or: A Chronicle of My Descent Into Madness

I know what you’re thinking: Star Wars complaints? Still? In this economy? You know what, sometimes you just gotta overthink stuff that doesn’t matter at all.

This is very heavily edited from its original form but still toooo much. Not recommended for human consumption.

I think what’s throwing me off so much and making me dwell on this way more than is healthy or rational is that this is the first time a Star Wars movie has felt WRONG to me. Like deeply, thematically off. Unsatisfying in a really fundamental way. I would call Solo the least essential SW movie for me, and even that I enjoyed well enough and it didn’t really break anything. TFA disappointed me in many ways but I was mostly able to detach myself from the things I didn’t like about how it related to the OT and accept that the sequel trilogy is fanfic. Even when SW has been at its worst, I’ve never felt betrayed by it. But TROS feels like a betrayal. And apparently that’s how a lot of people felt about TLJ, so I guess people who hated that movie can now point and laugh and say “I told you so,” but it’s just... a lose-lose situation for everyone.

It’s pretty amusing though that everyone hates this movie but hates it in different ways for different reasons. I, too, am dissatisfied with Ben Solo’s redemption! Oh, wait, a lot of people hate it because they think he shouldn’t have been redeemed at all, lol.

What gets me about TROS is that it punishes you for thinking about it. It seems sort of entertaining enough on a surface level, but as soon as you stop and really consider its plot, its characterization, how it fits into and engages with its own trilogy and the saga as a whole, it completely falls apart. It makes Luke and Leia seem incredibly shitty (oh yeah, Leia DID train as a Jedi, but couldn’t help her son at all and foisted him off on Luke, who was also like “actually, fuck this kid.” But Rey Palpatine is pure of heart and the best!) The final scene being set on Tatooine is an empty way to bring things “full circle” that has nothing to do with Rey’s character OR EVEN LUKE AND LEIA WHO IT’S SUPPOSEDLY “HONORING.” Leia had no attachment to Tatooine. Luke and Anakin both hated it there. And you can fuckin’ forget about Shmi. Who’s Shmi? lol. The binary sunset—even in repeat instances in ROTS and TLJ—has always been directly about Luke himself, not just Star Wars ‘cause it’s Star Wars. The original scene is about yearning for something more and the call to adventure. It’s about NOT WANTING TO BE THERE. But sure, Rey loves being alone in the desert, that’s definitely why she never wanted to leave Jakku. -_-

It’s interesting, after TFA I became pretty detached from the original characters in the context of this trilogy because it made their post-ROTJ story so bleak and not at all what I had imagined. Han and Leia broke up, their son turned evil, Luke fucked off to the middle of nowhere, Leia still doesn’t use the Force... I just sort of went “welp! I love the new characters!” Which is part of why Luke in TLJ didn’t bother me a whole lot despite the fact that I’m a big Luke fan. I liked the story it told. And it wasn’t really the story of the old characters anyway! Yes they’re there, but in service to the new characters. And then this movie ate its own tail and made the new characters function in service to the old characters, and in the process ruined the story for all of them.

Nothing that happens is actually developed within the movie itself, other than Force healing. The Palpatine reveal is pulled out of thin air. Rey and Ben’s relationship and Ben’s redemption are entirely reliant on development that happened in the previous movies. This movie doesn’t do any legwork to get there, and in fact regresses everything to its dumbest state so everything that happens materializes abruptly and resolves just as abruptly.

The thing that I’m stuck on about Rey Palpatine is that, okay, we know powerful Force users can come from anywhere, that’s not what was novel about Rey Nobody. What works about Rey Nobody—aside from it being an effective counterpoint to Kylo’s legacy baggage—is that it makes the story about Rey’s actions and choices going forward, it relies on her forward motion to connect the story to the past and make it relevant instead of leaning on “she’s important because she’s related to an important character!” Why is the story about Rey, what makes her so special that we centered a trilogy on her? Not the fact that she’s tied to the past, but the fact that she can rebuild the future. She is chosen because of what she’ll do and who she’ll become, not because of something she inherited. Rejecting Palpatine is still a choice, but it’s a generic one that doesn’t help to define Rey’s character at all, and it makes the story so much more beholden to the past instead of propulsive into the future.

And then even if you do commit to the Palpatine route, there was still an opportunity there of allowing Ben to live and having a Skywalker and a Palpatine teaming up to rebuild the Jedi (or some newly defined form of “Jedi”), a true rectification of Vader and the Emperor. It’s so obvious!!!!!!! It’s satisfying!!!!! It makes sense!!!!!! It connects to the rest of the saga in a meaningful way!!!!!! AND THEY DIDN’T DO THAT EITHER!!!!!!

Rey Palpatine is such a tacked-on twist that it makes everything contradict itself. Palpatine targeted Ben from birth, but couldn’t ever be bothered to find Rey. “You cannot deny the truth that is your family” unless you’re Rey. Ben Solo rejecting his true name and calling himself Kylo Ren: bad. Rey Palpatine rejecting her true name and calling herself Rey Skywalker: good. ??????? Taking the Skywalker name could have MAYBE been a little less bad if she had actually been Rey Nobody, but since they dumped the Palpatine reveal in there and convinced her that her parents were good and really loved her, why does she adopt herself into a separate dead family? Accepting and claiming her own heritage doesn’t have a saga of audience nostalgia behind it so fuck it! Rey has more meaningful personal connections with Organa-Solos but those names aren’t as marketable so who cares! This isn’t Rey’s story, this is A  S T A R  W A R S  S T O R Y

The conclusion is at odds with itself. If they want us to be sold on Reylo and Ben’s redemption, then it’s completely unsatisfying for that to end tragically. If they want us to believe Rey is fine and the ending is triumphant and hopeful, then it undercuts how important Rey and Ben’s relationship actually was, or how much Ben’s redemption really meant to the narrative. They’re telling us that Rey has all the belonging she needs with her friends and the Skywalker name, but in the final scene they’re showing us that she’s alone. The final frame of ROTJ is VERY POINTEDLY Luke with his friends, not standing alone smiling at ghosts.

And speaking of ghosts!! The lack of any Force ghost intervention with Ben is really, extremely bizarre, and I can even marginally accept that he doesn’t interact with ghost Luke despite “see you around, kid” because Luke would still probably piss him off. But ANAKIN. Anakin’s ghost encouraging Rey while his own grandson—WHO WAS LITERALLY DOOMED BY ANAKIN’S OWN LEGACY—is dying in a pit is so supremely fucked up it’s hard to even fathom. Anakin Skywalker? Who threw PALPATINE down a pit? The same Palpatine who then proceeded to haunt Ben’s entire life, even by PRETENDING TO BE ANAKIN?? Anakin’s ghost: “I can’t read suddenly, I don’t know”

Obviously the ignoring and retconning of TLJ is jarring, but the thing that really bothers me is the mending of the legacy lightsaber. I had thought that was something they would HAVE to deal with no matter what. I suppose ultimately it’s inconsequential if it was going to be mended either way, but to just not even acknowledge that it was ever broken, when that’s such a big, mythic moment in TLJ, really throws me. (then again, Luke tossing the lightsaber at the beginning of TLJ undercuts the big, mythic moment of Rey presenting it to him at the end of TFA, so... great. great job everybody.) I just had really imagined we would get some sort of Jedi learning happening in this, if not from Ben turning good then at the very least in regard to lightsabers—mending the legacy saber or healing Ben’s crystal or building new lightsabers, which we’ve never seen in a movie besides a deleted scene. Even salvaging Death Star kyber! Maybe that’s all too deep into the lore to include in a movie, but I just really wanted something even tangentially related to Jedi knowledge and the larger mythology, since TLJ was able to do it, and the end of the entire saga seems like an especially important place for it.

And even though they maintained (and expanded!) the Force bond, it’s truly weird how different those scenes feel than anything in TLJ. Rey and Kylo’s dynamic doesn’t track from what we saw before, the dialogue is stilted (because they ADR’d all of Kylo’s lines while he’s in the mask??), and the stylistic choices aren’t as refined or effective. Particularly on Pasaana when Rey’s side of the scene switches to night for some reason? I guess they were trying to mute the background, but visually it actually makes it more confusing because it’s not something that happens any other time.

The more I think about it the more dissatisfied I am with Ben’s redemption, and I already wasn’t happy with it. I was mostly relieved that it happened at all, because the first half of the movie makes no effort to go in that direction. But then even when it finally does happen, it makes no impact on the narrative. He has no real function in the final fight. He gives Rey an opening to defeat Palpatine and that’s it. Bringing Rey back is a personal moment, which is arguably fitting because that smaller more internal place is where their relationship resides, but its significance is undermined by the fact that there wasn’t even a REASON for Rey to die to begin with. She just drops dead because whatever (classic Padme), so the whole sequence of events is essentially meaningless because there’s no motivation for any of it. I had always thought that when he got redeemed he would get to fulfill some larger purpose, something absolutely crucial to the fate of the galaxy that paid off his parents’ and Rey’s hope that he would come back to the light. Han and Luke and Leia ALL died to bring him back, and he doesn’t get to do anything other than die and be instantly forgotten.

It seemed so important for Rey and Ben to reconcile their differences and work together, it’s what all the biggest moments of the trilogy have pointed to. The chasm opening up between them on Starkiller Base, the Force theme when their hands touch, the destruction of the legacy saber: all of that was huge and symbolic and meaningful. The WILL OF THE FORCE was for them to stop fighting each other. And I do love how the Force healing plays into that. But then ultimately when it comes time for them to work together for good and all, to defeat Palpatine and save the galaxy... they don’t actually get to do that. Ben gets tossed into a pit so Rey can become the Avatar and defeat Palpatine by herself. They could have at least shared the burden of channeling ~all the Jedi~ since that’s apparently fatal for one person to do. Why introduce this concept of a dyad and then barely do anything with it? It would have been so much more satisfying to see some real climactic teamwork, because the throne room remains the raddest shit of all time. They get the awesome hero shot posing with the lightsabers, and then... nothing. NOTHING!!!!!! WHAT IS THE POINT!!!!!!!!!

It’s funny (“funny”..........) thinking back on watching the trailers and how I imagined that Ben and Rey would actually be teamed up for a far more significant portion of the movie. I was really expecting Ben’s redemption to happen relatively early to then move on to defeating Palpatine. I enjoyed the possibility that the desert TIE chase/showdown was actually them training together (but then like every shot of them fighting in the trailers I saw speculation of “oh maybe they’re training together!” and uhh... it was never gonna be a two-hour training montage, lol). That shot of them destroying the Vader pedestal always looked to me like they were working together rather than fighting each other. I’M A FOOL

Obviously it’s Star Wars so you have to have a big epic lightsaber battle, and I do honestly enjoy the ocean fight (I love the atmosphere, I love the dumb anime Force jumps, I love how tired and half-hearted they get as it goes on, it’s great), but there is no good reason for them to fight as much as they do in this movie. It’s a bunch of noise in place of any real character development. Rey is essentially just fighting with herself and taking it out on Ben. Which is, you know, interesting I guess! But the ideological divide there is so weak. “Join the dark side. I super definitely believe in it and not just because I think it’s the only path open to me.” “No!” “Come with me to Exegol, we’re both headed there anyway, literally I’m just asking you to carpool.” “NO!”

Why was the ending of this trilogy “Han and Leia’s son dies”?? What is the point of that? By making him the son of our original heroes they made us care about him coming back to the light, they made it IMPORTANT for that to happen. And then it happens in the most perfunctory way and adds nothing to the story. Why start the trilogy with the tragedy of Ben having fallen to the dark side and murdering his father, only for it to end with the tragedy of him dying and never living a fulfilled life? That’s meaningless. That’s not a journey. He starts the trilogy symbolically dead and ends it literally dead. Rey starts the trilogy as a child in the desert longing for family and ends it as a child in the desert with a dead family.

They make Ben so good so quickly and then we don’t get to spend any time with him at all. He’s so GOOD finally free of the Kylo Ren persona he trapped himself in, it’s so cathartic to see the actual son of Princess Leia and Han Solo, and then... and then. I understand why so many people in fandom are unwilling to care about him, but at the same time, you’re supposed to care because the heroes care. You’re not supposed to LIKE the things he did, you’re not supposed to be happy that he chose wrong and terrible things, you’re supposed to root for him to be good. That is the ENTIRE POINT of him being Han and Leia’s son. He is MEANT to COME BACK. If he was never meant to come back then they could have made him any generic villain unrelated to our heroes and been done with it. But you are supposed to have that investment from the very beginning. There is supposed to be a tension there that ultimately gets resolved.

SO WHY DO ANY OF THAT? Why spend three movies arguing about whether Ben Solo can come back, and finally have it happen and give that release of YES HE’S BACK!!!! only to immediately kill him off? How is that satisfying or hopeful? Why did you make me invested in all this only to yank the football away at the last second? Was I not supposed to want Han and Leia’s only child to live? Because it doesn’t feel like a happy ending for the Skywalkers to die out. For the legacy of ALL our original heroes to be a fallen son whose life only ever amounted to giving them a replacement daughter.

As much as I can understand the appeal of subverting expectations and making it about how Ben chose evil and will never come back despite what anyone else hopes for, I just can’t accept how bleak and cynical that would be for the original characters and the story as a whole. That’s not what TLJ was doing, even though he ends that movie in an even worse place than where he started. (you know, like how ESB ended with Han in carbonite and then Han stayed in carbonite forever.) The ultimate message can’t be “give up hope, he’s irredeemable and gone forever” when every single hero character who is meant to be in the right is saying “no one’s ever really gone,” “hope is like the sun,” “it’s about saving what we love.” If you want to say that he chose evil and choice is all that matters, how do you then dismiss his choice to be good? Why would that choice suddenly not matter? It’s too late? He threw away all his chances, because in a hopeful fantasy story there’s a finite limit on forgiveness? There’s absolutely no way to ever make up for past mistakes, you can only atone through death? Unconditional love is bullshit? COOL

I can’t get over how boring fandom is that so many people are so insistent that Kylo HAD to die, he was always going to die, he deserved it. Death with redemption is a repeat of Vader that does nothing to break from the past or resolve the generational story; death without redemption is any typical villain (there are so many in Star Wars, you guys. so many.); LIFE is a unique ending that would have been worth telling. Immediate death is not punishment or redemption, it’s a cop-out. It always would have been more interesting for him to live, regardless of whatever other fallout you wanted. Death is easy. I’d much rather see painful, ugly transformation into something better than what came before.

There’s this idea in fandom that in order to be “worthy” of redemption, you can’t have done anything ACTUALLY bad, when the whole concept of redemption can only exist if you’ve done something wrong. Making the deliberate choice to change is the point. He did bad things because it’s a series about space magic where good and evil are denoted in the clearest possible way. The unquestionably bad things are presented that way on purpose so that when he chooses good it is also extremely obvious and representative of broad spiritual change on a basic fundamental level. IT’S... A STORY?????? Holy shit! But villains are bad and you shouldn’t care about them or the story that’s being told about them. :(

I realize this is blasphemy to certain segments of fandom—especially after I’ve harped on about how much I love and cherish public enemy #1 Kylo Ren—but the Rey/Finn/Poe trio doesn’t work for me. It’s too little too late, and it has never endeared me that it’s fanon based on Daisy/John/Oscar more than anything in canon (I KNOW, I’M SORRY). Poe really wasn’t a major character in TFA, so fandom used the transitive property to make Poe who’s friends with Finn who’s friends with Rey into a trio when the movie itself doesn’t establish a friendship between the three of them together. They’re not Han/Luke/Leia, and they don’t need to be, because mindlessly repeating things from the OT is the exact problem with this trilogy.

TROS relies on us having an investment in Rey/Finn/Poe, but all it does to establish Rey and Poe as friends is to have them bicker. And on top of that, Finn and Poe are reduced to bickering the entire time too! Clearly it was meant to be charming, but for the most part it wasn’t fun for me. There’s not enough there for me to latch onto as an emotional investment. Plus it’s just a dick move to exclude Rose, who is demonstrably closer with Finn than Rey has ever been with Poe. So that’s another big reason the ending doesn’t work for me, that after one movie (and Rey still mostly going through her own shit separate from Finn and Poe) we’re supposed to be satisfied with the ending group hug, that THIS relationship is the one that the entire trilogy has culminated in when they never actually did any work to get there or gave it any character weight. Han/Luke/Leia works because they went through shit together from the start, and despite Luke being on his own hero’s journey Han and Leia were always his peer group and emotional center. I can buy that about Rey and Finn—their foundation is solid even though their dynamic in TROS is awkward and distant—but Rey and Poe? There’s nothing there. When Rey spent the rest of her journey with a character established as her main equal/foil/partner/soulmate????, there’s just no way for a barely-existent friendship to feel like the REAL emotional center and serve as a satisfying character conclusion.

But that lack of development is also a problem with Reylo! This movie doesn’t do any work to get to that end point either! The only reason it works is because of their scenes in the previous movies, and because of Adam and Daisy’s WORDLESS ACTING in this movie. The emotion comes entirely from their performances, not the script. There’s no real substance there the way there was in TLJ. I was already invested going into this because I think their dynamic is the most thematically rich and unique in this trilogy, but my imagination is also doing a lot of the heavy lifting and I can totally understand not being sold on it based on what we’ve seen on-screen.

I do wonder if Reylo would resonate as much with me if it had a happy ending, because it’s very wrenching to think about the resolution they got, and it does work for me in my stupid fanartist overwrought symbolism brain. Part of what I like about TLJ is that they ALMOST get close, they ALMOST become friends, and then it twists the knife and they remain adversaries. The almost-but-not-quite, satisfying-because-it’s-unsatisfying messiness is very appealing in its own way. (I HATE TO SAY IT but Killing Eve s1 finale, “I really liked you” while being stabbed in the gut = literally TROS Reylo. ....I..... love it........ tbh I had thought about this dynamic just from the throne room scene in TLJ. The tentative trust and the antagonist letting their guard down only to be betrayed. And now Villanelle is Rey’s mom!) But really, ultimately it seems that if they’ve been tragic all along, giving it a tragic ending is just punishment. There’s plenty of tragedy in Star Wars, which is great, but there’s also a light at the end of the tunnel that makes it all seem worth it (the way the OT was for the PT). The sequel trilogy doesn’t have an effective light at the end of the tunnel, it doesn’t culminate in anything meaningful at all. It ends at the same place ROTJ ended except with a higher body count.

On my first viewing the opening sequence felt so WEIRD, like it just throws you into this bizarre little Kylo journey and the Palpatine intro that overloads you on “Palpatine drove Ben mad doing fake voices! Snoke’s a clone! What the fuck is going on!!!” But on rewatch I actually enjoy it BECAUSE it’s weird. XD The wayfinder is a fun, holocron-esque object (just... make it a real holocron though), the flying part is cool and that music is one of the few sections of the score that’s unique and catchy. Obviously the strobe effects on Exegol are not great, but I like the high-pitched screeching sounds, it’s effectively strange and ominous. And anyway, Kylo: I just think he’s neat!

Obviously we don’t get any sense of what Kylo was actually like as Supreme Leader, so I know this may not be representative of the entire year time skip, but the impression this movie gives of Supreme Leader Kylo Ren is: he spends all his time going on bullshit scavenger hunts and chasing after a girl and not doing any work. Which is hilarious and amazing. I will lament every day that this movie wasn’t the First Order falling apart because of incompetent leadership and a stormtrooper rebellion and a goddamn mutiny against the shittiest Supreme Leader of all time. KYLO REN HAS NEVER HAD A REAL JOB IN HIS LIFE

I wish they’d ever done anything with the implications of Finn being a former stormtrooper. With the fact that the First Order steals and indoctrinates children, which for some reason they brought up AGAIN in this movie without doing anything with it? I always felt in TFA that they didn’t really think through making one of their protagonists a former stormtrooper, because it then opens the door to all stormtroopers being potential good guys and breaks the ability to use them as faceless cannon fodder. Which would have been fine if you actually followed through on a stormtrooper uprising or something. But no, they continue to get mowed down, just with the added knowledge that many of them are brainwashed child soldiers. I suppose that’s a good metaphor for what happened to Ben. Hope you’re able to resist brainwashing by evil overlords, otherwise you’re doomed forever. Star Wars!

For as much as people complain that we’re asked to sympathize with Kylo while Finn has never done anything wrong ever in his life, it’s actually super weird for Finn to never struggle with his upbringing at all. It’s nice that he’s unequivocally a good guy, but like... he’s TOO well-adjusted for a kid who was brainwashed his whole life? I wouldn’t have minded some indication that he’s a little bit messed up. They never did anything with him being a former stormtrooper! It just never comes up! So WHY is that his backstory??? It had so much potential and it’s just... not a thing ever again. He immediately pivots to killing all stormtroopers he meets and it’s just... supposed to be... normal.........

I was always a proponent of Force-sensitive Finn, I absolutely wanted him to be a Jedi (since TFA marketed him that way!!!!) and thought it would have been great if, instead of a rehash of one last Jedi with one last master, both Rey AND Finn trained with Luke. But now that all is said and done and we got Force-sensitive Finn in the most half-assed, coy bullshit way possible, I’m wishing they’d instead focused on Finn leading the stormtrooper uprising that everyone wanted and given him something unique to do. They didn’t really give him his own story. The Jedi stuff is Rey’s area and the Resistance stuff is Poe’s area and Finn ends up just being... there. Chasing other characters around and yelling their names. I always felt like his TLJ storyline didn’t serve him well enough as a character, but in comparison to TROS it’s GREAT. He actually went on a journey and experienced growth! He got to meet Rose and learn about who he is as a person! Amazing!

Rose’s role didn’t have to be as big here as it was in TLJ, but to almost completely erase her and ignore her established relationship with Finn? To go out of their way to even give dumb expository moments to Dominic Monaghan and Greg Grunberg instead??? How is anybody supposed to believe that’s anything other than pandering to the gross, vocal hatred of the most inoffensive character in existence? I was really looking forward to seeing Rey and Rose interact, they would’ve been so cute together. With Leia dead Rey has no female relationships whatsoever. Her 0.25 seconds of interaction with Zorii is the closest we get. Wow. Thanks.

This is probably unrealistic with what they had to work with, but I keep thinking that Leia should have lived. They went through all the trouble of using this choppy leftover footage to put her in the movie, but they still kill her off when she could have just... stayed alive. Her life is so tragic but she has always been the survivor, the one who remains. Let Leia live, let Ben live, let them be reunited finally, let them rebuild. LET IT BE A FUJCKCKINGNNG HAAPPPPYYYY ENNDINNGGGGGG

Really just the way they chose to conclude Leia and Ben is so weird and confusing, because it implies that Leia could have used the Force to call out to Ben at ANY TIME. I mean, I guess the effort of that communication is what killed her? Maybe? Why? That’s too similar to Luke’s death except without the unique Force power justification, and also just... dumb. It really plays out like “well, guess I gotta die now! bye” and I feel like they could have tried a little harder to... not do that.

Star Wars: The Rise of Skywalker: I Feel Like They Could Have Tried a Little Harder to Not Do That

Even though the Han scene really works for me, it’s difficult to read what it is in-universe (instead of plain bald-faced audience manipulation to sell the redemption). I’d initially thought maybe it was a Force projection from Leia, but she’s already dead at that point and if she were going to project anything it should have just been her. Han isn’t an actual ghost, but it’s also more realistic than a vision, so it plays out in some weird liminal space that isn’t typically seen outside of a Force nexus. People who hate Kylo can easily dismiss it as him forgiving himself in a hallucination, which, yeah, IT IS, but in a sense that’s... okay?

The only crime the narrative really cares about is Han’s murder, and Han forgave Ben in TFA. Literally the moment he was murdered Han forgave Ben. So the Han scene in TROS isn’t some new, imaginary forgiveness that Ben made up wholesale, it’s Ben finally accepting the thing that already happened (“you’re just a memory”). And the instigator for that was Ben being stabbed in the same way by the person he loved. So he understood, exactly, that forgiveness, that type of unconditional love. And Rey did for him what he couldn’t do for Han, she took it back, she corrected it, so Ben becomes the embodiment of his father’s forgiveness. His father saved him, his mother saved him, Rey saved him, and all of that is refracted into Ben saving himself.

THE FORCE IS THE BLADE OF THE HEART

The symbolism of Han being stabbed/Ben being stabbed/Ben being healed/Rey being healed, all as vectors of the Force, and pain, and love, and that tangle of emotion manifested in physical ways and directed outward. The violence of internal pain externalized and then regenerative power focused in the same way. Han’s sacrifice carving a direct line to Ben’s capacity for healing with love instead of harming with pain, and the thin, thin line that exists between the two. THE BLADE!!!!! OF THE HEART!!!!! This is gibberish but it’s really nice in my head!!! Someday I’ll make a picspam and it’ll all make sense.

I keep wondering and feeling sad about what Rian might have done with this movie. TLJ wasn’t flawless, but the more time I spent with it the more I appreciated it, and relative to the rest of this trilogy the difference is staggering. Even the behind the scenes content for TLJ is better and more thoughtful. I always read the art books, and I was really disappointed in the one for TFA—it actually lowered my opinion of the movie because so much of it was “how can we slavishly recreate the OT but a LITTLE different?” But the art book for TLJ was really interesting and a great read, and there’s still plenty in there I disagree with or that I didn’t think was as good as they thought it was (Canto Biiiiiight!!!!), but overall it was just better executed. And it’s the same with all the behind the scenes footage. The Director and the Jedi is SO nice and well-produced and interesting and lovely to look at, and because I was so excited about TLJ I went back and watched the TFA making of special features and it was all so... bland. Literally down to a production level TLJ is better. I’m anxious to see the TROS art book and making of documentary to see how much of a fucking mess it is.

I was also really clinging to the hope of seeing deleted scenes, but now apparently we’re not even getting those. That was my big fear, that if this was as much of a mess as it sounds like then Disney is gonna bury everything. It’s all just so unsatisfying that I really wanted to believe there was something else out there I could watch and try to wring some semblance of meaning from it. But maybe if they never had any real concept of the story they were telling it’s just bad all the way down. The novelization stuff that’s coming out is... really bad...... although it’s pretty funny that some of this is turning into the old EU absurdity all over again. Honestly, if Ben and Rey had started out as the Jacen and Jaina AU I thought they were going to be I would’ve been fine with it. At least Jacen’s death didn’t wipe out the entire family.

In the wake of all this I’ve been revisiting my post-TFA and post-TLJ thoughts, which is basically just pouring salt into my wounds reminiscing on all the things I imagined and hoped for in this trilogy. Post-TFA is pretty funny because I was astonished by how much I liked Kylo and at the same time horrified by Reylo. I was so excited about the narrative and symbolic connections between Finn and Rey and Kylo, and I was so in love with the thought of Finn and Rey both training with Luke, and the two of them teaching Ben how to be good. I JUST WANTED EVERYONE TO BE FRIENDS. And it was such an exciting prospect, the next generation figuring out their place and deciding who they’re going to be. And things JJ himself said even reinforced that reading! THIS FUCKING QUOTE:

“This trilogy is about this young generation, this new generation, having to deal with all the debt that has come before,” Abrams says. “And it’s the sins of the father, and it’s the wisdom and the accomplishments of those who did great things, but it’s also those who committed atrocities, and the idea that this group is up against this unspeakable evil and are they prepared? Are they ready?” (https://www.vanityfair.com/hollywood/2019/05/star-wars-cover-story)

That’s a great thesis statement, JJ, it would have been cool if TROS had bothered with any of that. I don’t understand how he could say shit like that and then drop the ball so profoundly on all the things TFA and TLJ had set up. You DIDN’T NEED Rey Palpatine for “the sins of the father” when Kylo is RIGHT THERE.

And then there’s that Terrio interview where he says the original sin of Star Wars is separating the twins. Not Anakin being separated from his mother. Not Palpatine luring Anakin to the dark side. Not Anakin being pivotal in the destruction of the entire Jedi Order. SEPARATING THE TWINS AND PUTTING THEM IN LOVING ADOPTIVE HOMES THAT RAISED THEM TO BECOME GALACTIC HEROES IS THE ORIGINAL SIN OF STAR WARS. But Rey being sold by parents who loved her is fine. Killing off half of a “““Force dyad””” is also fine. BUT THE TWINS!!!!!!

I’ve at least spent so much time lamenting this movie that I’m a little more desensitized to it now. The really unfortunate thing is that I’m just not somebody who can write it off completely and be like “Star Wars is dead to me” because it’s one of the only fandom things I still care about at all. IT’S ALL I HAVE LEFT. And with TROS in particular there’s juuuuust enough there that I enjoy, which fuels my disappointment in the rest of it like a perpetual motion machine.

Anyway, I’m fine. We’re all fine here, now, thank you. How are you?

An Awkward Tech: Part 5

Summary: It has been 3 months since Matt stayed over at your apartment for the first time, and your relationship is going stronger than ever. His family is having a group dinner, and he invites you to come along and meet the rest of his family. 

A/N: Surprise! I finished this finally! I hope you all enjoy, I have like two or three more parts planned, and anything else I think of for these love birds. Larger time jumps to come. 

Part 1 – Part 2 – Part 3 – Part 4 – Part 6 – Part 7 – Part 8 – Part 9 – Part 10

It was the perfect afternoon, you and Matt finally went to the diner in dapper attire for lunch and now the two of you were sitting in his garden enjoying a picnic while watching the sunset. Life was good with Matt, you loved each other dearly and you couldn’t imagine life with anybody else. His brothers have become less of a nuisance to you, mainly they just say hi if they happen to be around and continue doing whatever they need. One time you, Ally, and the triplets went out for lunch because Ally wanted to approve of this triplet dynamic, and both you and Matt ultimately regretted it because Ally, Ben, and Kylo got along swimmingly and began to trade embarrassing stories about the two of you. And now apparently they have hung out together many times, trading more stories, talking about how grossly in love the two of you are, and bonding so when they become “in-laws” it won’t be awkward as Ally put it to you. You and Matt haven’t even been dating a year yet, just over 7 months, and Ally, Ben, and Kylo believe you’re going to get married. Neither of you have met the others parents yet. You did your best to ignore Ally’s comments, you couldn’t bring yourself to think too far ahead in your relationship.

Matt tapped you on the shoulder, “Hey Angel, you have been offly quiet, is something wrong?”

“Oh no. I’m just thinking about how much I love you Matty.”

“I love you too, princess. I have a question for you.”

“What is it?”

“My family is having a dinner next week, and I was wondering if you would like to come with me. They all are eager to meet you, so you wouldn’t be intruding, but it will be everyone.”

“What exactly does everyone mean?”

“My brothers, my parents, my maternal uncle, his daughter, my non-biological uncle, my maternal grandma and grandpa, and my mom and uncle’s godfather who is basically my great uncle.”

“Oh wow, that is a large family. I think I’ll come with you, get meeting them all out of the way in one event. And do I get names, or do I have to wait until later?”

“You can have names now. In the order I told you there is Ben, Kylo, Leia, Han, Luke, Rey, Lando Calrissian, Padmé, Anakin, and Obi-Wan ‘Ben’ Kenobi. And yes, Ben is named after him, he helped take care of Luke and mom when grandma Padmé got sick after they were born, and he continued to be a large part of their lives, and now their kids’ lives.”

“That is amazing. What is the story about Lando?”

“Oh, he is a long time friend of my dad’s. My dad has known him just about as long as Uncle Chewie, who I’m not sure yet if he is able to make it. I hope he is, Chewie is the best.”

“Is Chewie his real name?”

“Naw, it is just a nickname he got as a teen. He is very tall and hairy, and where he is from there is this legend about a Sasquatch type thing called Chewbacca, hence Chewie. I don’t even know his real name. I think he legally changed it to Chewie, too.”

“Your family seems very interesting.”

“It most definitely is. I’m excited for you to meet them.”

“I’m excited to meet them.”

The next week, you incessantly text Matt about what to wear for the 8 hours leading to the time he was going to be picking you up. You sent him questions, pictures of the clothes laid on your bed, mirror selfies, pictures you made Ally take of you, links to clothes you could run to the mall and buy, and just general comments of nervousness. He eventually just called you to help calm you down. He told you an outfit to wear, and reassured you that it was perfect. Matt knew this whole mess was due to your nerves about meeting his family, mostly his parents, and he did his best to comfort you.

To help calm you, he arrived early so the two of you could just sit together without anybody around. Ally was spending more and more time at her boyfriend’s, and she left to his place around noon. You felt she was going to move out soon, but that was something you would think about when the time came. You always knew Matt had your best interest in heart, and it definitely showed when he was at your door an hour early holding a brand new fuzzy blanket.

Before you could get a word out he spoke, “I know I’m early, but I figured you would like some time with just me, here alone, before heading over. And I got you this because I know you like fuzzy things.”

You hugged him tight, “Oh Matty, I love you. You’re always so thoughtful and caring. And you’re the best boyfriend ever!”

“I love you too, (y/n). You’re the best girlfriend ever. Are you gonna finish getting ready now, or later?”

While you had your hair fixed the way you liked, and had put on your blouse, you still had on your comfy lounge pants and slippers. “I think I’ll change later, I want to use that blanket now.”

You took the blanket out of his hands and took off the tag and ribbon that kept it folded for display, then ran and launched yourself on to your bed, throwing the blanket over yourself. Matt just laughed at your adorably childish ways, and walked in to join you. He took off his shoes and glasses before climbing in behind you, pulling the blanket over himself and then you closer to his body. He held you close, kissing your neck, whispering sweet nothings, and you hummed in content. You loved being held by Matt, he made you feel small and protected, and you could never get enough, especially with the kisses and whispers.

Matt kept an eye on the time, rousing you from the nap you fell into 15 minutes before the time he had said he would pick you up at. He sat on the couch while you finished getting ready, and once you finished, the two of you left for his family’s dinner.

On the ride to his parents’ house you were bouncing your leg in both excitement and nervousness. You hoped that they liked you, that you wouldn’t embarrass yourself, and that Uncle Chewie was able to attend. While everybody seemed interesting to you, Chewie fascinated you the most and you couldn’t wait to meet him. The drive wasn’t too long, only half an hour away from your apartment, enough distance between the triplets and their parents for each set to feel comfortable. You knew there was a strong family bond, one you wished you had, and that while the boys needed their freedom, they could never live more than a reasonable drive away from family.

Matt pulled up to a beautiful two-story house with a nice lawn, exactly what you would expect of the home of a semi-famous senator. As always, Matt opened up your car door before offering his arm to you, walking to the front door. He opened the door and walked the two of you in, explaining that it was easier to keep the door unlocked when expecting guests or family than to have somebody answer it every time.

From down the main corridor, a somewhat familiar woman’s voice called out, “Is that you Matt? And is (y/n) with you?”

While leading you to where the voice was coming from Matt responded, “Yes, Mamma, to both questions. And before you ask, we are walking to you now.”

Entering the kitchen, you found a small woman, one you saw every-so-often on the news, but in far different attire. Instead of the suit she adorned for work, Leia was in a nice t-shirt and jeans with an apron on top. She set down the spoon she was using and took off the apron before coming to greet the two of you.

Smiling a warm smile rarely seen on TV, she came and hugged her son, “Hello my darling at-at, how are you?”

“I’m doing fine, Mamma. I would like to formally introduce you to my girlfriend, (y/n).”

Leia turned to you, “It is a delight to finally meet you, (y/n). You are so much prettier in person, pictures can never capture a person’s aura.”

You held out your hand, “It is a pleasure to meet you, Mrs. Organa. I’ve been a fan of your senatorial work since I became old enough to vote.”

Leia softly pushed your hand aside, “Oh, darling, just call me Leia. And I’m more of a hugger in a non professional setting, especially with my boys’ girlfriends, if you don’t mind.”

“I don’t mind at all, Leia, I’m more of a hugger too.”

Another voice chimed in while you were hugging Leia, “You’re gonna fit in just fine, kid.”

When you looked at the man who spoke, you could tell just from the hair and the way he held himself that this had to be Han Solo, “I am going to assume you are Han.”

He laughed, “You assume correctly. Nice to meet you, (y/n). Matt, along with his brothers, have told us a lot about you.”

“It is nice to meet you. I see where Kylo and Ben get their hair from. But where does Matt get his hair from?”

Leia rejoined the conversation, “That would be from my side. My father and brother both have blond hair, you’ll see when they get here. Although the curls are from Han.”

Matt groaned, “Okay, that is enough history for now. (Y/n), let me show you around the house.”

You took Matt’s hand and waved to his parents, “It is nice to meet you, see you in a little while.”

Matt lead you through the house, passing by his brothers watching TV, and to the backyard. There was a deck and a nice sized grass area, but what caught your eye immediately was the garden taking up the back portion of the property.

You gasped, “Is that your mom’s garden? It is amazing!”

Matt chuckled, “Of course it is my mom’s garden. Most of my succulents are clippings from her’s. Do you want to go walk through it?”

“Oh yes please Matt,” you squeaked out while squeezing his hand hard and jumping up and down.

Matt just shook his head and lead you to the garden, the two of you walking around looking at all the plants for awhile.

Then you heard Ben’s voice call out, “Hey, you two lovebirds! The Skywalkers are here and Old Ben just pulled up with Grandma and Grandpa. And Dad said Lando is a few minutes away with Chewie.”

Matt called back, “We’ll be in in a moment. Thanks Ben!”

“Yes! I get to meet Uncle Chewie!”

Matt just laughed and pecked your cheek before leading you back in. Entering the room where Ben and Kylo had been watching TV, more people were sitting around talking. There was a man that looked about Leia’s age with a beard, next to him was a girl, then there was a white-haired old man with a beard, another old man, and a very fashionable old lady, and you were pretty sure you could figure out who was who. When they noticed you two had entered the room, all conversation stopped, and they looked at Matt expectantly.

Matt cleared his throat before speaking, “Everybody, this is my girlfriend, (y/n). (Y/n) this my Uncle Luke, mom’s twin, his daughter Rey, my cousin, Obi-wan or Old Ben, my mom and uncle’s godfather, and finally Grandpa Anakin and Grandma Padmé.” Matt pointed at each as he said their name and they waved to you.

Padmé spoke out first, “Oh, aren’t the two of you so precious. You compliment each other perfectly. Ani, aren’t their expressions towards each other familiar? I’m so happy my little Matty found somebody so perfect, and I haven’t even talked with you yet, but we will soon enough.”

Little Rey spoke next, “(y/n), do you like sciencey stuff like cousin Matt?”

You went and knelt down in front of where she was sitting, “Why yes I do, I’m going to become a scientist one day, although in a different area than Matt.”

“Oohh! Matty is gonna be coming to my school soon to talk to the science club at lunch, do ya wanna come with him? I’ll make sure to tell Mr. Windu if you do.”

“I’d love to Rey.”

“Yay! Thank you (y/n), you’re the bestest, just like Matt!”

Kylo and Ben chimed in at the same time, “What about me?”

Rey laughed, “You two don’t like science and building stuff as much as Matty, so you guys are lame.”

The two brothers both acted hurt, and Rey just stuck her tongue out at them, prompting everybody to laugh. Matt joined you on the floor, and the conversation continued on, either about stories of past family gatherings or asking more about you. After some time you leaned over to Matt to ask where the restroom was, and he insisted on escorting you.

Once out of sight of the family he kissed you, “I love you so much. And my family does too. Even little preteen Rey likes you, and normally she just sits bored and quiet at things like this. I think you became her idol when you said you were going to be a scientist and would come talk to her club with me. She never believed me when I told her girls could love science, too, but seeing you proved it to her.”

“Aww, you really think so? I’ll talk science with her as much as she wants.”

“You’re amazing, Angel.”

He continued to guide you to the restroom and waited to escort you back, detouring through the kitchen to get some drinks. While in the kitchen, the front door opened, and Han booked it over to the entryway. There were only two people missing from the group, so you knew it had to be Lando and Chewie. Matt walked over to you with the opened drinks and asked if you wanted to go say hi. Telling him yes, you followed him to the entryway, finding the three friends in a big hug. Chewie was taller than you imagined, you pictured a man only a few inches taller than the triplets, but this man was probably pushing 7 feet, not the 6 and a half you were picturing. You couldn’t see much of Lando, but you could see parts of his clothes and knew he had a sense of style. No wonder the triplets dressed so well, having the influence of both Padmé and Lando they couldn’t possibly dress horribly. You began questioning yourself, but you knew that Matt helped pick out your outfit so you were able to stop the growing anxiety. The three friends broke their hug and noticed the two of you standing there.

Han introduced you, “(y/n), this is Lando and Chewie, my long time friends. Guys, this is (y/n), Matt’s future wife, currently his girlfriend.”

Lando stepped forward and held out his hand to you, “It is a pleasure to meet you, (y/n).”

You shook his hand, “It is nice to meet you, too, Lando.”

Chewie placed his hand on your shoulder and spoke with a voice deeper than the triplets, “You and Matt look like a great match, and from what I’ve been told, you are. Nice to meet you kid.”

The two greeted Matt before speaking with Han again, and you and Matt returned to the living room.

Almost to the living room Matt suddenly hollered out, “Hey Ky! Unca Wanwo is here!”

Over the laughter from the room, you could here Kylo yell out, “Hey Rey, cover your ears. Can you hear me? Okay, good. Fuck you Matty-kins! Alright Rey, you can uncover your ears.”

“I think I’m gonna need that story later, Matty.”

“It would bring me great pleasure to tell you.”

Returning to the living room, Kylo glared at Matt. You both sat down and conversation flowed, the three friends joined, and Leia popped in and out, getting help from Ben, Kylo, or Han when needed. You leaned the history behind the many last names, Padmé legally kept her maiden name, but socially went by Skywalker; Leia had the last name Skywalker until she was old enough to legally change it to her middle name, Organa, which was the last name of another family that was close to theirs and helped take care of the twins when Padmé got sick; and then most obvious, Han and Leia hyphenated their last name for the triplets, each keeping their name, but never correcting anybody if called Organa-Solo socially.

Eventually Leia came out and announced that dinner was ready and to help yourself to everything set out in the kitchen, then find a seat at the dining room table.

As everybody was migrating towards the kitchen, Rey ran up to you and tapped your arm, “Hey, (y/n), can I sit next to you at dinner? Matt can sit on your other side!”

“Oh of course Rey, I would love it if you sat next to me!”

She beamed up at you, and you smiled back. What you didn’t notice was everybody else giving Matt a knowing look, you were a perfect fit to the family and he better not lose you.

As you were serving up you food, and helping Rey reach the things set further back, Padmé pulled Matt aside.

“My darling Matty, I know this is really early, but I want to give you this. Your love is so pure, and she is such a beautiful sunflower, radiating light and happiness all around her, I want you to use my engagement ring to propose. Your parents eloped before I even knew they were in a serious relationship so I couldn’t give it to Han. I know you two are taking it slow, and it might be a couple years before it is used, but I wanted to give it to you now so you have it when the moment is right. I love you Matty, and you couldn’t have found the more perfect young lady.”

Matt teared up, “Thank you Grandma, this means so much to me. I’ll take good care of it until I use it, I promise. I love you too Grandma.”

“Now let’s get back and get some food before they notice we’ve disappeared.”

Once served, Matt took the seat on your left, since Rey chose the seat on your right. Everybody ate and carried on light conversation, but once everyone had their fill, you and Matt got put on the hot seat.

Lando began, “So I know the two of you met through school, but what’s the whole story?”

Matt nudged you with his foot to let you know you could tell the story, and so you began, “I was working on one of my final papers when my laptop got a virus. My best friend and roommate knew Matt worked with computers since they were in the same psych class and asked him the next class if he could help. He insisted that he could come over after class, and Ally decided to not give me advance warning and burst into our apartment screaming, waking me from a nap, and then she left a few minutes later for a date. He fixed my laptop, I took him to a small cafe by my building for dinner, and then paid for his meal as a thank you, much to his disliking. The only way he accepted was that I told him he could pay for our next dinner, which became our first date. After the date, Ally celebrated because apparently since the moment she saw Matt she knew we would work and had been trying to find an excuse to introduce us. And I’m glad she found it.”

“Ally what?! And now she thinks we’re sickeningly sweet.”

“Yeah, but that’s the way she is.”

“Alright. So anyways, yeah that is pretty much it. Mom helped me arrange the reservation for that dinner, and (y/n) was definitely surprised and awed by the restaurant.”

Rey gasped, “Are you guys like a fairy tale?”

You smiled, “I think we are. It sure feels like it.”

“That’s amazing. You’re a science princess and Matt is a science prince!”

Chewie joined in next, “Wait, nobody told me you were a science person, too. What are you going into?”

“I’m going to go into bio-chem and help research a cure for cancer in a lab.”

There was a bunch of positive murmurs around the table, and looking over at Rey, she was already looking at you in complete admiration. In that moment you knew this was the family for you, they all were taken away by your career path unlike your own family who, while supporting your decision, didn’t seem to believe it was a good choice or that you would actually help find a cure. You would hold on to them for as long as possible.

“That is truly amazing, (y/n). I can’t even fathom how smart you must be wanting to do that,” Chewie admired.

Before you could deny it, Matt jumped in, “She is the smartest person I have ever met. The way her mind works is amazing. She has such an analytical mind she could find connections between things you couldn’t possibly think could be connected. She can break any concept down into easy to understand language. She will deny it, but she is so smart.”

You just looked at him, his eyes and smile were filled with love and admiration, and you licked your thumb and smudged his glasses.

Matt gasped and pulled off his glasses to clean them, “What was that for?”

You giggled, “That was too sickeningly sweet for even me to handle.”

Everybody laughed at your exchange, and Ben reached across the table to give you a high five.

The rest of the evening was filled with delicious desserts and plenty of family stories you thoroughly enjoyed. You even got a few stories from Han, Chewie, and Lando’s adventures before meeting the Skywalkers.

You and Matt left the same time Luke and Rey did. The four of you said goodbye to everybody else, and walked to the front yard.

Rey tapped her dad, “Hey dad, can Matt drive me around the block in his car before we go?”

Luke looked at you and Matt and you both nodded, “Of course he can, sweetheart. I’ll stay here with (y/n), see you in a bit.”

Rey grabbed Matt’s hand and ran to his car, Matt barely keeping up with her.

As they drove off, Luke spoke, “I don’t know what it is about you, but Rey has never asked any of the boys’ girlfriends anything, she always just kind of glares at them, even when she was a toddler and asked everybody questions. I have a feeling you’re going to be somebody she looks up to, just like Matt, so hopefully you’ll be around for awhile.”

“I sure plan on being around for awhile. I don’t know how I got so lucky, an amazing boyfriend with an equally amazing family.”

“Well, we are all lucky to have you, too. Especially Matt. You’re both sweet kids, with amazing futures ahead of you. I wish you the best.”

Matt’s car pulled up while Luke was speaking so you both walked over, Rey jumping out with a huge smile on her face. She gave you a hug when everybody exchanged their final good nights.

As Matt drove off, he placed his hand on your leg, “My family really likes you, (y/n). They were all bugging me about when I was going to propose to you.”

You laughed, “I really like them too. And boy aren’t they eager, we are still undergrads.”

“That is just the way they are. They know it would be a while if it were to happen, but that doesn’t stop them from asking.”

“They definitely aren’t the most subtle.”

“Never.”

“I love you Matty. Thanks for inviting me.”

“I love you too, (y/n).”

The rest of the drive Matt took the time to tell you the story behind Unca Wanwo and at-at. Kylo was slower than the others getting pronunciations down as toddlers and so Unca Wanwo was all he could say, not Uncle Lando, and then both Ky and at-at were nicknames Leia came up with when they were newborns.

As always, Matt walked you to your apartment and kissed you goodnight, but this time was different knowing his family adored you and with the ring burning a hole in his pocket waiting to be used. He would use it eventually, he felt it in his soul, but it would be a while until it happened. Once back in his car he pulled out the ring and smiled thinking about you, and your possible reactions when he proposes, he was the luckiest man in the galaxy.

Tags: (since I’m cool enough to have one now) @bellaren18 

A/N pt. 2: I have read a few fics recently with human Chewie in modern aus, and I felt like that would be a good fit for this story.

FANDOM WAS REALLY GOOD TO US THIS WEEK, COME CRY OVER STAR WARS FIC WITH ME AGAIN. Because sometimes you just gotta cry over how wonderful these authors are to share such fantastic pieces with us, how reading (and I love that fandom is so invested in reading, when it feels like a dying art some days!) fic makes me fall in love with these characters and this galaxy all over again. We are so lucky that there are all these people wanting to share with us and here’s some of the really good stuff (SO MUCH GOOD STUFF) that I loved! STAR WARS FIC RECS: ✦ drink up, dreamers (you’re running dry) by 31_rabbits, han/leia & luke & ben, 2.6k    She’d expected her tears to be cold, too. But they are hot, and they are bitter. Salt from a vaporized sea. ✦ Equinox by lilyconrad, obi-wan/anakin, NSFW, sith!obi-wan, some d/s, 72.7k wip    During the Clone Wars, Obi-Wan and Anakin crash on a remote planet and take shelter in the ruins of a grand estate only to find they are not alone. ✦ Anakin Skywalker and the Stray Droid by protos_metazu_ison (larkspyt), obi-wan/anakin & anakin/padme & cast, 28.4k    Anakin adopts a stray droid, much to Obi-Wan’s displeasure, which is fine because Rusty doesn’t like Obi-Wan all that much either. ✦ Death Becomes Her by stonefreeak, anakin/padme & palpatine, body horror, 1.6k    Padmé finds herself waking up after she died. Apparently, her husband couldn’t bear to let her go. She’s not grateful. At all. ✦ Armored Oasis by Spectersticks, obi-wan & anakin & cody & ahsoka & cast, 19.9k wip    The Council sends Obi-Wan Kenobi with Anakin Skywalker and Ahsoka Tano to uncover the reason behind these consistent attacks, while defending the outpost from the Nikto clan’s ranged assaults. ✦ tell me what it is you want by sunflashes, obi-wan/anakin & padme/ahsoka, NSFW, modern au, 14.4k wip    Anakin is done as fuck. His philosophy professor and academic advisor, Dr. Kenobi, has been working him to the point of breaking, and he just wants to get really, really drunk. ✦ Things Freely Given by ilcuoreardendo, obi-wan/anakin, vampire!obi-wan, ~1k    “You shouldn’t have come.” Obi-Wan’s voice is strange. ✦ untitled by likealeafonthewind, obi-wan/anakin(/padme) & sidious, 1.5k    So perhaps one way this can go is that Obi-Wan is just sitting in the Temple security room, broken and lost in the turbulence in the Force from all the violence and death that happened there (I imagine it must have created some kind of vortex of negative energy or perhaps fed into the darkside nexus under the Temple). ✦ Carrying the Stone by Makalaure, obi-wan & anakin, 4.3k    “I wish Master Qui-Gon was here instead of you.” ✦ The Virgin Duchess and Other Stories by ambiguously, obi-wan/anakin/padme/satine, ~1k    There were a number of stories about the rule of Duchess Satine Kryze. Some of them were even true. ✦ Saber’s Hilt by lovelykenobi, obi-wan/anakin, NSFW, d/s, dirty talk, 2.3k wip    Anakin’s a boy with a mouth and a sassy attitude. Obi-Wan reacts accordingly. ✦ Alternative by Glare, obi-wan/anakin, NSFW, modern au, dark themes, 2k    PROMPT: In the Negotiation-verse what would it be like if instead of the whole drugging and kidnapping business, they ended up sorting out the kiss and dating. Anakin has no idea his boyfriend is a serial killer. ✦ Your Face Is Like A Melody by Darlings (FromDreamstoEmpires), obi-wan/anakin, NSFW, modern au, ~1k    writegowrite asked: #3 for the sexy prompt, please? ✦ Brothers (working title) by Charity_Angel, obi-wan & anakin & qui-gon & padme & shmi & yoda & cast, 17.3k wip    In which Qui-Gon has a very near miss on Naboo, Obi-Wan is very stubborn, and they end up breaking a lot of rules accidentally as a result. All because of that kid they picked up on Tatooine. full details + recs under the cut! 

STAR WARS FIC RECS: ✦ drink up, dreamers (you’re running dry) by 31_rabbits, han/leia & luke & ben, 2.6k    She’d expected her tears to be cold, too. But they are hot, and they are bitter. Salt from a vaporized sea.    I’m always a sucker for Leia stories, especially ones that look at the scope of her life, give her room to really react to everything that happens, even in small moments, even when a lot of it is cut short because she picks herself up and keeps soldiering on forwards. And this is set across the span of years that really show just how epic everything is with her story, the joys and the sorrows both, and there’s just something so intense about her here that really fits with her character. A lovely read. ✦ Equinox by lilyconrad, obi-wan/anakin, NSFW, sith!obi-wan, some d/s, 72.7k wip    During the Clone Wars, Obi-Wan and Anakin crash on a remote planet and take shelter in the ruins of a grand estate only to find they are not alone.    Chapter 15: This is an update rec and will focus on this chapter, rather than the fic as a whole. As always, I sort of want to explode over how much I love this fic and how satisfying it is, especially in regards to how much I love this version of (sort of) Sith!Anakin who is doing exactly what I had hoped for when I prompted Lily for this fic–the contrast of him against Jedi!Anakin highlights so many things about his character. It’s not just that, of course, it’s also how this is an Anakin that is more settled in who he is, because he’s entrusted himself to his Master, has chosen to give everything of himself over to this person that he loves and who loves him in return, how that clears away so much of his anger and instead allows Anakin’s charm and charisma to be at the forefront of Isten’s character. He’s just so beautiful to look at and watch, there’s something almost wild and fey about him, but also bright as the sun and so, so easy to fall in love with. And he’s still very much Anakin Skywalker, that’s what makes his scenes with actual!Anakin so fascinating, because they’re not the same person, Isten is more than just Anakin, as Anakin is more than Isten is, but Anakin is still the source and what Isten has figured out about himself has relevance to Anakin.    This makes any interaction they have a delight–just watching them strip down the ship for any parts they might be able to use, because Anakin is having a sulking fit, reminds me that they’re both mechanical geniuses and I’d have enjoyed it just for that. But the purpose of that scene is greater, it’s about Anakin having breathing room after the reveals from the previous chapter, and calming down and having the space to ask about Isten’s relationship with Veris, to show us that Anakin has all these prickly defenses about what he sees as his twin being like a slave to Obi-Wan’s twin. That it gives Anakin the breathing room to really listen to what Isten says and why it’s not what he thinks, to show us whyAnakin is still thinking about this and gravitating towards what he sees with them. That it’s not about the dark, but instead about something that settles them, something good, something that makes them both feel secure, something that Isten wants, that words are frustrating for him, but a firm hand on his back cuts through all that noise in his head and stays there. That it’s about being paid attention to, about being cherished and cared for. And you understand why Anakin keeps coming back to what he knows is between them, the something underneath the surface that we can feel in him, that cannot leave it alone.    And one of the great things that I love so much about this fic is that it doesn’t bring something up just to solve it immediately. There’s discussion of it here, it’s clear that Anakin feels a pull towards all of this, but he’s not there yet, it’s not such an easy, direct path for him. Things come up and get in the way, of course, but it’s more than that, it’s that he’s not fully ready yet and that makes the excitement over future chapters all the greater, because there was progress, there was satisfying forward movement, but there’s still more journey to go!    And, oh, I am so curious about where it’s all going, especially when they finally make contact with their men and I’m dying to know plot stuff, but also Isten being kind of bratty about soon being parted from Veris, that it’s so easy to really sink into thoughts about Isten’s affections, that we’ve seen him be really fond of Obi-Wan, to turn to him and press against him when wanting shelter, to see his affection around Anakin, for the source of himself, how he seems to likehimself in a lot of ways, to how everything is so much deeper when it comes to Veris. That Isten is cut to the core when he’ll be parted from Veris, even just for awhile, and shows it by sulking. That he’s jealous when Veris pays attention to Anakin, even with good reason. That it’s a reflection of Anakin’s desire to be sullen about things he doesn’t like, a freedom to be petulant about it that Anakin doesn’t allow himself, even while it stirs up everyone’s lack of desire to be parted from the one they love.    But EVEN MORE THAN THAT there’s another plot twist that makes perfect sense and yet I DID NOT SEE IT COMING and makes me wonder about where all of this is going, with such a remote planet that nobody is really allowed to go to, if someone should end up staying there, it’s not like there would be anyone to know they were there, and Ugly is still in the house and, oh, I’m not sure if they’ll make it off planet before the end, if Obi-Wan and Isten will spend more time together, if Veris and Anakin will spend more time together, or if Ugly will rear up before they can leave, OR WHAT. And it’s really, really exciting to be so invested in both the relationship progress and the plot progress! As you can see by how I cannot stop talking about it!! ✦ Anakin Skywalker and the Stray Droid by protos_metazu_ison (larkspyt), obi-wan/anakin & anakin/padme & cast, 28.4k    Anakin adopts a stray droid, much to Obi-Wan’s displeasure, which is fine because Rusty doesn’t like Obi-Wan all that much either.    All chapters: I’ve recommended this fic at several points along the way, but now that it’s finished I wanted to write a rec that’s for the overall story, because this was one of the most satisfying reads I’ve had in awhile! There’s something so incredibly solid and good about this fic, there’s a weight and sharpness to the characterizations that I really, really loved–I noticed it especially with Obi-Wan, who is this really great balance between stern and kind, that he’s both these things in a way that Obi-Wan Kenobi always should be. That there’s a warmth to his character, that he’s considered and kind, but that he’s also sharp when necessary, that there’s a heaviness to his character that makes him feel unmovable. I also love Anakin, who is this really brilliant, bright character, but who is also kind of a mess who only halfway knows what he wants–he knows that he feels all these things, but he doesn’t necessarily know how to fully untangle them–this is why the ending worked so well for me, because he just did not feel at all settled in his own skin, even when he knew what path he had to walk, which contrasted against Obi-Wan, who does have to wade through a lot to get where he is, but he knows himself and there’s a surety to him once he’s decided on something, that is spot on here.    I loved this fic for the characterization, that Obi-Wan and Anakin and Padme all felt like they were given depth and weight, but I also loved it for the plot! The OC droid character fit so well into the universe here, like this could very easily have taken place in the GFFA and was so incredibly engaging, I genuinely likedRusty the droid and would have read so much more from his point of view. The balance between what the droid himself brought to the story, his own backstory and motivations, was balanced against seeing Obi-Wan and Anakin through his eyes, seeing things with a fresh gaze that could comment on them and nudge them in a different direction, worked so, so well! And I really loved the ending, the way everything rolled towards the final events of it, and I just felt satisfiedafter reading it. “Obikin through the eyes of a droid” sounds like it could go a lot of different ways, but I thought the author absolutely did justice to it here, that it lived up to the concept and made something really engaging and true to the characters. I’m so glad to have gotten the chance to read this one and I think it’s a great read for when you want something that’s not precisely fluffy, but is definitely good for the heart! ✦ Death Becomes Her by stonefreeak, anakin/padme & palpatine, body horror, 1.6k    Padmé finds herself waking up after she died. Apparently, her husband couldn’t bear to let her go. She’s not grateful. At all.    I’m biased because this was based on one of my posts, but it’s legitimately a fantastic piece, it captures the horror of Padme being stuck in this reanimate body, the slow stealing away of her sanity, that none of this is good and, oh, Anakin, he is so far gone and doesn’t understand what he’s done to her. It’s horrifying and yet it doesn’t overplay its hand, instead there’s something almost delirious and unhinged about it in a way that makes me feel so, so much for Padme and it’s just everything I wanted from Anakin finding a way to forcePadme to stay alive! ALSO IT’S JUST REALLY AWESOME. ✦ Armored Oasis by Spectersticks, obi-wan & anakin & cody & ahsoka & cast, 19.9k wip    The Council sends Obi-Wan Kenobi with Anakin Skywalker and Ahsoka Tano to uncover the reason behind these consistent attacks, while defending the outpost from the Nikto clan’s ranged assaults.    I picked this one up pretty much because I wanted some action fic (tower defense fic is a great way to describe it!) and I very much got a fun action plot that was satisfying, but I didn’t expect to get character feelings to go along with it, yet, boy, did I ever! The beginning chapters are a really solid (though, it could stand to break up the paragraphs a bit more imo) action sequences, with some really, really quality Obi-Wan whump where he is a goddamned tank, especially when you see him through the eyes of the clones, they’re just in awe of the larger-than-life presence of their general! But eventually he hits his limit and Anakin kind of loses his goddamned mind over it in a perfectly Anakin way and freaks out over Obi-Wan getting hurt and overreactions in a really fascinating way–both what he’s capable of when he’s freaking out and because the fic shows just how much Obi-Wan means to him, that there’s such love between these characters shown in the way they interact with each other.    It hit so many of my iddy buttons, with Anakin going on a rampage because he thinks Obi-Wan might be dead and he flips out, you can knock Obi-Wan down but I’m not actually sure anything can really stop that guy from getting back up again, that Obi-Wan yells at Anakin in a legitimately heavy way, he’s justified in it, and yet it comes from a place of obvious love, and, oh, it’s this great digging into the thorny issues between them in a way that makes me love them both so very much, because Anakin is in a slippery fall here, but it comes from a place of such care. All of it is so satisfying, getting to see Obi-Wan and Anakain and Ahsoka all have their moments of total badassery, all on top of a solidly interesting and engaging mission fic! I couldn’t ask for more! ✦ tell me what it is you want by sunflashes, obi-wan/anakin & padme/ahsoka, NSFW, modern au, 14.4k wip    Anakin is done as fuck. His philosophy professor and academic advisor, Dr. Kenobi, has been working him to the point of breaking, and he just wants to get really, really drunk.    I think I’d started this fic before, but I recently picked it up again and started from the beginning, and just got really sucked into it. It was the perfect length for me to read now and had enough resolution that I’m not left pining, but instead I’m satisfied with how it was this really fun, cute college AU fic! There was just the right amount of pining-to-getting-together for my tastes, enough to make me enjoy the build-up to it, while Anakin especially just absolutely pined and was totally in love, to when that all finally came to a head and they fell into bed together. And that was wonderful as well, how there was some nice foreplay until Anakin just could not stand it anymore and he was so, so ready, please just fuck him already, grinding down onto Obi-Wan’s fingers and pleading for more, until Obi-Wan finally pushes into him. It didn’t have to be long, but it came at just the right time after the lead up to it, so that in addition to being very nicely satisfying sex (I am always here for Anakin being greedy and wanting more of Obi-Wan in him!) it made for this overall really fun, light-hearted experience in reading this fic! It had that affect on me where I felt energized afterwards again, like I could read another dozen stories just like this one, because I enjoyed this fandom and these characters so much! ✦ Things Freely Given by ilcuoreardendo, obi-wan/anakin, vampire!obi-wan, ~1k    “You shouldn’t have come.” Obi-Wan’s voice is strange.    This was a short but lovely piece of pretty much exactly what it says on the tin! There’s a very nice dramatic intimacy to the story, that there are events that happen around this, obviously before and after it, but it’s about the feelings and connection between these characters more than anything. It’s about how desperate Anakin is, how he’ll give anything (even of himself) to get them through this, to not be pushed away, and that Obi-Wan is hungry for Anakin in this really heavy, rolling way that makes for some very lovely imagery, as he pushes Anakin down onto the bed, his control frayed at the edges, and Anakin’s thoughts pushed out of his head in that way that I love for him. A very lovely read! ✦ untitled by likealeafonthewind, obi-wan/anakin(/padme) & sidious, 1.5k    So perhaps one way this can go is that Obi-Wan is just sitting in the Temple security room, broken and lost in the turbulence in the Force from all the violence and death that happened there (I imagine it must have created some kind of vortex of negative energy or perhaps fed into the darkside nexus under the Temple).    This is a description of a story more than a story itself, but it satisfied me in the same way that fic satisfies me when I read it, so onto a recs list it goes! And I really enjoyed this, it’s a ROTS fix-it piece that balances between how everything is always about Anakin at the heart of things, but that also Obi-Wan is a favored child of the Force, how things might have been nudged in a slightly different direction and then snowballed, if just a couple of little things had been changed. And it’s a super fun, pleasing read and I love the whole point of the fic, that the highlight of it is this moment: Sidious might be the Sith Lord hovering nearby waiting to take it over but Obi-Wan is one of its children, he’s grown up over its heart and called it home and family. Like, yes, GIVE ME ALL THE FORCE LOVES ITS CHILDREN FIC. ✦ Carrying the Stone by Makalaure, obi-wan & anakin, 4.3k    “I wish Master Qui-Gon was here instead of you.”    I was curious about this fic as soon as I saw it because I’ve liked the author’s Tolkien writing, so I was hopeful about getting a good Star Wars story–and, oh, I definitely did. This is a heavier fic in a lot of ways than I expected, there’s such a raw anger to bb!Anakin here, who is upset and hurt in a way that is entirely understandable and makes me ache for both him and Obi-Wan, for how hard this is to struggle through. It’s sharp and he says hurtful words (but he’s a child and the narrative understands that, even as his words hurt, they’re coming from a place of upset themselves and from someone who’s not old enough to control themselves yet, that Obi-Wan too understands this) and it’s not an easy start. But it’s still good and there’s still hope, this isn’t a fic that made me feel worse afterwards, but instead one that I felt really did justice to the way these two were thrown together, neither of them precisely chose this, and yet there’s something there already, something epic in the making. That’s a difficult balance to achieve sometimes, but this one did it beautifully. And, oh, that last line is absolutely perfect, I still grin just thinking about it. ✦ The Virgin Duchess and Other Stories by ambiguously, obi-wan/anakin/padme/satine, ~1k    There were a number of stories about the rule of Duchess Satine Kryze. Some of them were even true.    This worked well for me because it’s not really necessarily a true story, but instead about what’s said about these four characters and their relationship and what happened with them, how they came together. It’s sort of a children’s fairy tale story and I’m always a sucker for these four together, so I enjoyed this! ✦ Saber’s Hilt by lovelykenobi, obi-wan/anakin, NSFW, d/s, dirty talk, 2.3k wip    Anakin’s a boy with a mouth and a sassy attitude. Obi-Wan reacts accordingly.    My caveat before I move further on is that this fic has some slur play that briefly gave me pause (though, that may be a personal thing more than anything!) that I think a heads up on would help beforehand, but I really did enjoy this fic a lot! It’s pretty well designed to appeal to my iddy wants, it’s cheerfully filthy and embraces the tropes it uses and is clearly having a greattime doing so, which is always infectious! It’s very much about the d/s relationship, how it gives Anakin structure for when he can’t help backtalking and being a real brat, how you can feel how much more wrung out of all that restless energy he is afterwards. It’s a fic meant to appeal to these elements and I enjoyed it for just cheerfully being happy dirty sex! ✦ Alternative by Glare, obi-wan/anakin, NSFW, modern au, dark themes, 2k    PROMPT: In the Negotiation-verse what would it be like if instead of the whole drugging and kidnapping business, they ended up sorting out the kiss and dating. Anakin has no idea his boyfriend is a serial killer.    Oh, I really loved this so much, it’s this great mix of something fluff and yet also really creepy, knowing what we do about this serial killer!Obi-Wan. I mean, I gladly would have picked it up just for cute domestic-esque interaction where they talk over Anakin’s casework, then Obi-Wan fucks him over the desk in really sweet, satisfying sex, but to have that undercurrent of something much darker and fucked up? Ahhh, I really missed that blend from Negotation! But also really I super appreciated just how happy the sex made me, how it was cute and charming, that of course Obi-Wan had some lube on hand and Anakin was just as ready to be fucked over his desk, that there was this curl of something in him as Obi-Wan opened him up, spread him wide, and pushed into him, that it said something about Anakin that he liked what this did to him. It’s just a really, really fun, super delicious piece to read! ✦ Your Face Is Like A Melody by Darlings (FromDreamstoEmpires), obi-wan/anakin, NSFW, modern au, ~1k    writegowrite asked: #3 for the sexy prompt, please?    Oh, this was lovely and another fic that came along when I needed it, just a pwp but with the undercurrents of just the right amount of a d/s dynamic, that it’s super hot sex while also giving structure to Anakin, keeping him within bounds and focused, and how much Anakin responds to that, how much he enjoys that attention, that feeling of being caught and guided and held. But also just really nicely done sex, which I appreciated so very much. ✦ Brothers (working title) by Charity_Angel, obi-wan & anakin & qui-gon & padme & shmi & yoda & cast, 17.3k wip    In which Qui-Gon has a very near miss on Naboo, Obi-Wan is very stubborn, and they end up breaking a lot of rules accidentally as a result. All because of that kid they picked up on Tatooine.    Often times when I read fic that uses Legends and canon together in a fic, which are incompatible with each other, I find myself wanting to argue and yet I was just fine with it here–and it dawned on me anew that it was because this fic is clearly coming from such a great, warm, caring place with it, that it’s clearly just having fun doing its thing and loving everyone and everything, that I got swept up in that wamrth and wanted to read another 50k of it immediately. It’s such a wonderful fic where everything goes right–Qui-Gon lives after Naboo, but is injured so Obi-Wan temporarily takes over the beginning of Anakin’s training. This allows everyone breathing room, this means Obi-Wan now knows what happened on Tatooine instead of being in the dark about it, this means that he can talk to Qui-Gon about what to do with Anakin and isn’t weighed down by grief, this means that there’s breathing room for everyone, this means that things are able to be nudged in a better direction, so that Shmi can be freed and brought to Naboo, so that Anakin can be more settled, that Obi-Wan has more breathing room, and eveyrone is just really wonderful and happy.    It’s not without struggle, they still have a lot of shit to wade through, Palpatine is still out there, but it gives the Jedi breathing room and lets them have the space to take stock and deal with things more slowly. And, oh, all the worldbuilding bits! The classes that Anakin gets enrolled in! The going to get lightsaber crystals! And the characterization is wonderful, there’s such developing affection between Obi-Wan and Anakin, Qui-Gon is healing and is able to better talk to Obi-Wan here, Yoda cackling about hilarious shit that happens, Jedi friends being there to help and/or laughing at silly things! And Obi-Wan especially, my love, is gorgeously written here and we see him becoming the really great teacher that we know he’s meant to be. The way he deals with Anakin, the way he deals with other Padawans, when not weighed down by grief, is so true to his character and so warm-hearted. And Anakin is goddamned precious and Padme is kind-hearted and sparkling–and, really, everything in this fic sparkles! The writing and characterizations are so sharp and just left me with a smile on my face the entire way. It might be a fix-it fic but that doesn’t mean it’s any less engaging or wonderful to read!

Return of the plot twist by  Danielle Grufferty

(Reposting because it didn’t appear in the tag the 1st time - Had to remove the direct links) 

Danielle from Huffpost UK, show yourself!! I'll buy you a pint and twiglets!!! Joke aside, this article made me chuckle and it’s good to see the reylo tag acknowledged. 

Note: this piece *hopefully* contains spoilers for Star Wars: The Last Jedi

We are blessed to live in such times. Sure there’s Brexit, Trump, while Boris Johnson, our beloved Foreign Secretary quotes Kipling on state visits to former colonies. But life has its blessings - for one thing, we’re among the lucky few in history who are able to speculate about what’s going to happen in the next Star Wars film. Imagine if Twitter had existed in the late 70s, I’m sure people would have been all over the theory that Luke and Leia were brother and sister.

I’m sure you enjoyed as much as I did, giving into the dark side, (ignoring both your better, and Rian Johnson’s, judgement) by watching the trailer this week. This is a rare moment in history, there were no surprises when (spoiler alert) little Anakin turned to the dark side. There’s questions that need answering, and pronto. The mystery of Rey’s parentage is (apparently) a done deal, and besides there are larger issues at play here.

Firstly, does Rey dislike sand as much as her grandfather, Darth Vader, did? Has Rey inherited all of her grandfather’s special set of skills? And why did Luke turn full absent father, and abandon his daughter on a desert planet despite the fact that his family has a deeply troubled history with sand?

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So how will the great “I am your father” moment be revealed? We know the filmmakers’ task is a big one. We’ve already had an identical twist in the original trilogy, so the stakes are high. The sentence will need to be delivered in a different and unique way, despite the fact that it will be the exact same words, just replacing Luke with Rey (Yes okay, I know that is not the actual line!)

I can see how it is going to be play out, (this is what it must feel like to have a force vision.) Perhaps late in Act III;

“Rey, I am your father.” (Luke)

“Rey, I am your cousin.” (Kylo)

I’m not sure I could cope with the shock of finding out Rey is Kylo Ren’s cousin. Although come to think of it, Luke and Leia grew up in different systems and turned out to be brother and sister so perhaps every character in this galaxy are at least distant cousins?

But let’s be serious for a moment and discuss what form a possible twist could take. Before anyone goes off on one, quoting emo Kylo Ren at me, he’s now carrying a scar (like Harry Potter) which makes him look even more dangerous/attractive.

As much as our villain may resist it, Kylo Ren remains the son of a princess and a penniless nerf herder. (I assume a nerf herder is the equivalent of a stable boy in this galaxy). I know I’m not the only one who noticed his shiny locks, luscious lips and the pout... I could go on. Disney has done wonders with royalty before this, and while Rey may be the chief protagonist of this space opera, it is Kylo Ren who is the Disney Prince in this fairytale.

Besides chances are that Ben Solo not only inherited his parents’ good looks but some of their most endearing personality traits too. Are the filmmakers really not going to let us see any of the good in the young Skywalker? And would it really be worth living in a universe where Jar Jar Binks lives but Ben Solo dies?

Besides, and this for me is irrefutable evidence, Rey’s grown up sorting out rusty bits of metal, she knows what she’s doing here.

The aptly-named Reylo theory* (the theory that Rey and Kylo Ren will have “a relationship” in the saga) is painted by the “antis” (those who think Reylo is evil, woah chill) as something solely created and fuelled by “the girls”. This of course feeds the whole narrative around Star Wars and gender. Apparently women cannot watch science fiction/anything without romanticising it, because that’s what “girls” do. These gendered assertions inevitably sit comfortably alongside the idea that Star Wars is “not a girl thing”.

This debate has a touch of irony to it, in that the (largely male) critics of the theory fail to understand that being a supporter of “Reylo” does not mean that you think Rey and Kylo Ren are going to ride off into the binary sunset together (though if it has to happen, can it be on Ren’s TIE silencer please). Basically, these chaps among the “antis” seem to think that a relationship always equals romance, which seems odd. Anyway, a discussion for another time/tumblr.

To the delight of many, the trailer seems to be offering fans hints that this tale will not fit the classic hero/villain trope. Perhaps the fans do indeed need preparation for the moment they realise their beloved Han was slayed not by the villain, but the Byronic hero of this story. And who doesn’t love not one, but two Byronic heroes because as has been said before, our two protagonists represent “two halves of the dark and the light”.

But the possible hint of what is to come at the end of the trailer that dropped this week, could be a cause for concern. If it’s hinted at, it’s not really a twist is it? Like Trump, Brexit and Corbyn’s electability, have I called it wrong once again? A relationship between them may be a risky strategy when as George Lucas has often said, Star Wars are films for 12 year olds. I guess all we can continue to count on are cryptic tweets from Rian Johnson, who this week teased us with a modern interpretation of Romeo and Juliet. The plot thickens.

People put a lot of effort and faith into history’s great theories. I’m beginning to know how Stephen Hawking felt with his work on relativity, and Star Wars exists on an even larger galactic scale. Like General Leia, one can only live in hope.

* I’ve only posted the #reylo tumblr tag but there is TONNES of evidence out there if you are interested, so all credit to the Reylo community - check out the links in the description of this video. (Vincent Vendetta)

My Unpopular Star Wars Opinion: Or, Why The Phantom Menace is Better Than The Force Awakens

Was it, though? 

Were the Star Wars prequels – The Phantom Menace, Attack of the Clones, and Revenge of the Sith, whose vary names have become entertainment-industry watchwords for disappointment – really, truly better than the current Disney-owned era of Star Wars, which so far has produced two widely-praised billion-dollar-grossing movies, and is about to unleash a third, about which expectation is as high as a city in the clouds? Can I really think that, for reals?

Well, yes and no.

Let’s get the obvious things out of the way: there were some very poor decisions made during the Prequel Era. Let’s not pick over the corpse of George Lucas’ story choices – the whys and wherefores of virgin births, whiny antagonists, and Jar Jar Binks – and focus instead on the filmmaking technique employed. The dialogue is wooden. The camerawork is rigid. The performances are flat. The pacing is all over the place: in Phantom, the much-vaunted podrace goes on for at least two laps too long; indeed, the whole Tatooine section of the film shoots the legs out from under the momentum. Prior to that it had been a breakneck chase from overwhelming odds, our heroes escaping Naboo by the skin of their teeth; as soon as they break down on Tatooine, they’re sheltering from sandstorms and going gambling. And, of course, there’s the whole “taxation of outlying star systems is in dispute” nonsense: doesn’t quite grab you as quickly as “it is a period of civil war”, does it?

But there’s still something about them that feels Star Wars-y. There’s still a sense, even though I know Lucas was making it all up as he went along, that this fits into the universe correctly (I mean, he was making everything up as he went along, which is why Leia kisses Luke in Empire). There’s a cyclical nature to how the prequels marry with the original trilogy that’s about more than a visit to Tatooine or the presence of a Mandalorian bounty hunter. The first films in both trilogies are, in essence, about innocence: a simple quest by simple people to prevent an immediate danger (removing the blockade of Naboo versus destroying the Death Star); the second films complicate things by splitting up our heroes on separate quests before uniting them for a finale that feels, at best, like a pyrrhic victory; before resolving their respective trilogies in an all-bets-are-off finale beset with divided loyalties and a dangerous Sith Lord. Revenge of the Sith and Return of the Jedi – even their titles are darkly mirrored – both deal explicitly with Vader and his relationship to the Force; he wrestles with his emotions and his commitment to his Order, the love of his wife compelling him to commit dark acts before finally the love of his son pulls him back into the light. The Force Awakens, whilst it does mirror aspects of Star Wars, feels more like a greatest hits package; we have another callow youth from a desert planet on a hero’s journey, another aged mentor, another cocky pilot, another tragic death, and another large object exploding in space, but it feels more consciously designed. A box-ticking exercise, rather than a thematic resonance. Or maybe it’s just because the iconography is so similar.

The First Order is basically the Empire, and the Resistance is basically the Rebellion. There are TIE Fighters and X-Wings. There are Stormtroopers and helmeted good-guy soldiers. There are English-accented characters walking around in SS outfits being glowery and evil. Whilst I’d never attempt to suggest that Amidala’s chrome-plated ship, or the wing-walking droid craft, were as iconic as what we got forty years ago, to go back to the same well is disappointing.

My wider issue, however, is how the new era seems to disregard somewhat the mythological aspects of Star Wars. I guess I’ve only seen one film in the trilogy, but despite the palette-swap nature of its craft and locations, it does feel markedly different to the Star Wars that came before.  There’s a sense of destiny in Star Wars, a “balance of the Force” that was hinted at in the original trilogy and made explicit in the prequels; the yoke of inevitability pulling characters in directions that they may not wish to go. The subtle, underplayed, and often-ignored theme in the prequels of once-noble institutions slowly crumbling into irrelevance and becoming the very thing they hated speaks to the wider issue of the “will of the Force”, of the Chosen One appearing to bring balance. That Chosen One is assumed to be Anakin, and we’re left to interpret for ourselves whether the balance was actually achieved; is it when he kills the Younglings? Or is it when he topples the Emperor? This thread ties the first six films together to produce something grander and more metaphorical, even if it is a case of Lucas essentially retconning to some degree his original intentions from the seventies and eighties. The Force Awakens feels a bit different, like the preoccupations of the previous films are gone; there’s a darkness to everything creeping in around the edges, complicating matters. Whether this makes for a better narrative is moot: what I’m saying is it makes it feel less of a whole with the rest of Star Wars.

This is exacerbated by the time-jump. Obviously we were always going to go 30-40 years ahead of Jedi. But so much has happened in that time. In the 20 years between Sith and Hope, the galaxy might be fundamentally different, but from a narrative view, nothing has changed: the Empire is still victorious and the Jedi still in exile, just like we left them. But in between Jedi and Force, we’ve seen Luke’s attempt at training new Jedi falter, Ben Solo fall to the Dark Side, the rise of the First Order, and the formation of the Resistance, to say nothing of the yet-unrevealed histories of Snoke and Rey. The film features flashbacks and a cliffhanger finale. It just feels odd, out of place, not at one with the cyclical nature of Star Wars. And, furthermore, it undoes so much of the happy ending of Jedi: despite the deaths of Vader and Palpatine, the Dark Side rises again, there's a new Empire, Luke goes into exile (apparently convinced that the Jedi as an institution is a bad thing) and Han and Leia split up. It's sad! It's tragic! And whilst I'm fine with all that happening in Star Wars, I think it should happen on-camera. Not in flashbacks or spin-offs, it should be part of the saga. To introduce it as backstory complicates the rhythm of the films. It feels less of a whole. It feels like a sequel, not the next episode. And from the trailers and pre-release hype of The Last Jedi, it seems like this is the new normal for Star Wars.

None of this makes the Disney films bad. In fact, going back to the popular iconography of the original trilogy makes perfect sense. Having the heroes still be a scrappy insurgency helps us root for them. Giving us a mysterious backstory to uncover is compelling. But my argument is, all these elements feel discordant with what's gone before. The prequels, for all their faults technically and narratively, helped weave a mythological tapestry for Star Wars that is being undone by the new films. I feel they're remaining too wedded to familiar imagery and story points, whilst simultaneously moving too far away from the more conceptual, mythological underpinnings of Star Wars as a fable. I kind of wish that Lucas had completed his mooted final trilogy – his own VII, VIII, and IX – before selling to Disney (especially if he took more of an executive role, as he did with Empire and Jedi, and left the writing and directing to others). Taken as individual films, maybe they wouldn't be as good as what we've got – because despite everything I've said here, I really do think Force Awakens and especially Rogue One are pretty tremendous – but at least we'd have Lucas' complex, contradictory, rhythmically compelling vision completed. Of course, then we wouldn't have Star Wars' new Holy Trinity of Rey, Finn, and Poe – perhaps the Disney era's most important additions to the overall mythos.

Look, Star Wars is complicated. George Lucas is complicated, and his legacy is complicated. I'm chuffed to bits he sold to Disney – not because DIsney is the be-all and end-all, but because they've proven their ability to marry corporate aims with creative excellence; look at Pixar and Marvel especially. The Force Awakens has issues but it's still a great, crowd-pleasing, immensely successful movie, and already we've got BB-8, porgs, and broadsword lightsabers sitting in the popular imagination in ways that, arguably, nothing in the prequels ever really managed (apart from Darth Maul and his double-ended saber, I guess). And again, the progressive casting of the new films is long overdue and utterly fantastic. I'm still really, really excited about The Last Jedi, and Abrams' Episode IX, and Johnson's new non-Skywalker trilogy. But I can't help feeling like something quintessentially Star Wars has been lost; perhaps it's an oddness, a willingness to duck when everyone is expecting a jump. Perhaps it was Lucas' own obsessions and interests that fuelled the franchise, that gave us everything from the sublime (Vader, the Death Star, lightsabers, Yoda) to the ridiculous (midichlorians, Gungans, Ewoks, Watto). Perhaps the new films are better films, but in my heart of hearts, I'm not sure I can love them quite as much. Maybe The Last Jedi will end up being the best Star Wars experience this side of Knights of the Old Republic, but it will still feel slightly separate. Further tales. An imaginary story. The expanded universe.

Maybe it's me. Maybe it's just knowing that Lucas had more stories he wanted to tell and never got the chance. Maybe it's because I've always been a lot warmer towards the prequels than most. Maybe things will shift with time – as more films come out in the new universe, with more characters, then this will start to feel like the status quo, the new normal. I hope so, because I love Star Wars – indeed, it's worth repeating, I think the new films are excellent, and are better films, better made films, than all three of the prequels. But although my head believes we're in a golden age of Star Wars not seen since the early 80s, my heart has yet to be convinced.

Anyway. I'll let you know if I still feel the same way after The Last Jedi...

This post was originally published on The Portalist. It has been reproduced here with permission. For more from The Portalist, follow them on Facebook.

Unless you’ve been living in isolation on Ahch-To for the past six years, you probably know that we’re just days away from the release of The Last Jedi. The Last Jedi is a Star Wars movie, and it’s going to have Skywalkers and lightsabers and the Millennium Falcon and even porgs, whatever the heck they are. Hooray! But what is it going to be about?

This article includes everything you need to know before you walk into The Last Jedi, plus some stuff that you probably don’t, to be completely honest. The sections below are ordered from the most remedial to the most nerdy, so feel free to skip the start if you know your stuff—or to start right at the beginning if you’re seeing it with friends who don’t know you’re a Star Wars ignoramus.

The background: the Star Wars universe before The Force Awakens (2015)

The Last Jedi is a Star Wars movie. You’ve seen Star Wars, right?

If you haven’t, you should take time to watch some movies in the days ahead of The Last Jedi’s release. You don’t need to, because I’m about to give you the background, but you should, because (most of) the Star Wars movies are great. If you click this link, I’ll even tell you what order to watch the Star Wars movies in, which is a thing you actually have to think about with the Star Wars movies.

Anyway, here’s what you need to know about the ghosts of Star Wars movies past, which are certain to have an impact on The Last Jedi just as they did on its predecessor, The Force Awakens (spoilers follow, of course).

RELATED: The 7 Most Absurd Moments of the Star Wars Holiday Special 

Force ghosts of Star Wars movies past. Photo Credit: Lucasfilm

Star Wars (1977) establishes the most important parts of the Star Wars universe. The galaxy is ruled by the Empire (bad), but there is hope in the form of the Rebellion (good). There are also Jedi knights (good), who are monk-like warriors with lightsabers. The original Star Wars opens with an Imperial raid on a Rebellion ship. Princess Leia is captured by bad guy Darth Vader, but not before stashing plans to the Imperial super-weapon (the Death Star, of course) in a couple of robots (“droids,” in the Star Wars universe) and firing the whole package off in an escape pod. Enter Luke Skywalker, a kid on a desert planet who stumbles on the droids, finds out that the father he never knew was a Jedi knight, hitches a ride off the planet with a smuggler named Han Solo, rescued Leia (or, more accurately, she rescues him), and eventually blows up the Imperial super-weapon as Darth Vader spirals off into space in a damaged ship.

Credits roll, but the story continues. Vader’s survival (and a huge box office return) set the stage for a sequel.The Empire Strikes Back (1980) is perhaps the best Star Wars movie and features the biggest spoiler since Citizen Kane: Darth Vader is Luke Skywalker’s father (that’s Empire’s spoiler, not Citizen Kane’s). From here on out, Star Wars is a family affair, and that family is the Skywalkers. Empire also features Luke training on a remote planet with a Jedi master (Yoda), a relationship it seems he’ll be on the other side of in The Last Jedi.

RELATED: Star Wars Gifts for the Jedi in Your Life 

Yoda on the remote planet Dagobah. Photo Credit: Lucasfilm

The original trilogy wraps up with Return of the Jedi (1983), which goes back to the surprise-family well with the reveal that Princess Leia is Luke’s sister and Vader’s daughter. Vader both repents and dies in Jedi. Han and Leia get together. This stuff looms large in the new movies, as you might imagine, especially since we’ve somehow gone from the Jedi Return-ing to being down to The Last Jedi. Something has gone wrong, it seems.

Before me move on, let’s talk prequels. I haven’t bothered with the episode numbers yet, but Star Wars loves its episodes. Special editions and re-releases have changed the title of Star Wars (1977) to Star Wars: Episode IV – A New Hope, and the other two are Episodes V and VI, and technically have similarly clumsy titles now. The prequels filled in the beginning with Star Wars: Episode I – The Phantom Menace, Star Wars: Episode II – Attack of the Clones, and Star Wars: Episode III – Revenge of the Sith (the Sith are the evil Jedi with red lightsabers). They were released years after episodes IV, V, and VI, and weren’t nearly as well-received, but you knew that. They track the story of Anakin Skywalker, destined to become Darth Vader, and also prominently feature Obi-Wan Kenobi, destined to be Luke’s mentor in the original movie.

RELATED: 50 Star Wars Quotes from a Galaxy Far, Far Away 

Ewan McGregor as Ben Kenobi in the prequels. Photo Credit: Lucasfilm

Oh, and it actually came out after The Force Awakens, but I’ll mention Rogue One: A Star Wars Story (2016) here because of where it fits in the narrative. It’s a prequel that takes place immediately before the very first movie (i.e. between Episodes III and IV), and it isn’t really relevant to the new trilogy—though you should watch it anyway, because it is so, so dope.

More background: The Force Awakens (2015)

Photo Credit: Lucasfilm

After two prequels that everyone hated and one prequel that only some people hated, Star Wars was revived again after Lucasfilm was sold to Disney. The first big Star Wars release of the Disney era was The Force Awakens, which serves as Episode VII, a direct continuation of Episode VI—excuse me, I mean “Star Wars: Episode VI –Return of the Jedi.”

The Force Awakens returned Star Wars to some of its old conventions, rejecting the prequel trilogy’s love for the Episode part of the title, obscure politics, and, uh, bad acting. It also features a plot that closely parallels that of the original Star Wars. Some people think the derivative plot makes The Force Awakens a terrible movie, which is a fine opinion to have and share at dinner parties, and definitely not something that makes me want to remind you that the whole plot of Star Wars was completely derivative to begin with, anyway, man, so why don’t you just relax and enjoy things?

via GIPHY

Anyway, The Last Jedi will be a direct and immediate sequel to The Force Awakens, so you should just watch The Force Awakens. It’s just one movie! But if you really won’t, I’ll go ahead and spoil it here.

With the Empire gone, the Rebellion has established a Republic. But Luke Skywalker is missing and a new set of baddies—the First Order—is trying to re-establish the old Empire.

RELATED: Ralph McQuarrie: The Artist Who Made Star Wars Shine

Once again, we meet a hero (Poe Dameron) who stashes secret stuff (part of a map that shows where Luke Skywalker is hiding) in a droid (BB-88—the round thing) before being captured by a bad guy in black (Kylo Ren). And, once again, that droid finds a parentless hero (Rey) on a desert planet, and that hero discovers a calling.

We also meet a stormtrooper-turned-good-guy (Finn) and some heroes from the original trilogy: Han Solo, who has returned to his smuggling ways, and Leia, who goes by General instead of Princess now. It turns out that bad guy Kylo Ren is their son, but he’s obsessed with the wrong part of the family legacy—the work of his grandfather, Darth Vader. Kylo Ren is being guided by a very ugly dude named Snoke, who appears as an enormous hologram.

RELATED: 6 Swashbuckling Space Operas to Enjoy While You Wait for the Next Star Wars 

Snoke in “The Force Awakens.” Photo Credit: Lucasfilm

The Force Awakens ends with a mashup of Star Wars’ greatest hits: a prison breakout on board a super weapon, a space battle to take out that station, a ground assault to take out the station’s “shields,” a lightsaber battle, and family drama. The last proves to be the biggest surprise of the movie, as Kylo Ren kills his father, Han Solo. But the good guys win out, the map to Luke gets put together, and Rey heads off to meet Luke Skywalker.

So that’s where we are now—but this raises plenty of questions.

The questions that The Last Jedi might answer

VIDEO

If one thing separates The Force Awakens from every other Star Wars movie, it’s that the film seemingly lacks a Skywalker at its center. All six previous movies starred either Luke or Anakin, plus extra Skywalker parents and siblings and Skywalkers-by-marriage. The Force Awakens puts its most prominent Skywalker, Kylo Ren, in the bad guy role, à la Vader, but our hero is not (necessarily) a Skywalker.

But, of course, we don’t know who Rey’s parents are. Could she be a Skywalker? Leia and Han don’t mention a daughter. Nothing has indicated that Luke has one. But Star Wars has always been about Skywalkers, and if The Force Awakens reminded a lot of people of the series’ first film, well, then there’s a certain twist that would make The Last Jedi very reminiscent of the second.

Speaking of Skywalkers, The Last Jedi is going to feature Luke pretty prominently. What’s he like these days? It seems he’ll be at least as reluctant a mentor as Yoda initially was in The Empire Strikes Back—and perhaps one that’s a good deal more cynical. Why is that? And what will his relationship with Rey be like?

Photo Credit: Lucasfilm

Rey isn’t the only character whose origins are a mystery. Who is this Snoke dude? Is he a Sith? He’s apparently not, but if he’s not, then … well, what the heck is he?

Rey may be off meditating and training, but Poe and Finn are still in the thick of things with General Leia. They’ll be joined by newcomer Rose Tico (a resistance maintenance worker). What’s on their plate in this one? The previews are pretty short on super-weapons for them to blow up. Will The Last Jedi be a quieter, sadder affair, as Empire was?

There’s another new character that’s getting a lot of buzz: Benicio Del Toro’s character, who we don’t even have a name for yet. He’ll meet Finn and Rose at a gambling resort and may help them break a code, and that’s about all we know.

As for the rest we’ll just have to wait to find out. In the meantime, though, at least we have lots of questionable fan theories.

What happens next? Fan theories galore

A quick warning before we move forward: while the fan theories listed below are just theories, they obviously could be correct. They also involve a deeper examination of preview footage and available details than you might usually have going into a new movie. So consider this your sort-of-kind-of-spoiler warning, if you care about such things. Now, onto the theories!

∙ Luke is Rey’s father: 

This is the most obvious answer to the series’ current big question. It would be tidy and would be on-brand for the series. But it wouldn’t be surprising. Does that matter?

∙ Rey is Leia’s kid.

The only over obvious way to make Rey a Skywalker is to have her be Leia’s kid. But neither she nor Han Solo (the father of the only kid we’re sure Leia has  had) seem to be looking for a long-lost daughter.

∙ Rey is a Kenobi.

This theory is very popular, but I really don’t know why. It’s largely based on Rey’s accent, which is not exactly unique in the Star Wars universe. It’s not clear how we’d end up with Kenobi children, and using Rey to connect Obi-Wan to the new movies seems like a solution to a problem nobody thinks exists.

∙ Rey is a Jinn, as in Qui-Gon from Episode I. 

I mean, she’s not, but it’s a real theory, so here you are.

∙ Rey turns on Luke.

The case for this is largely based on preview footage.

∙ Luke is the bad guy.

The Skywalkers don’t have a great track record for staying not-evil, and Luke has some interesting lines in the preview. He allegedly went into hiding after his pupil Kylo Ren turned to the dark side—but hey, who knows what really went on, or what happened after that? This theory meshes nicely with the Rey-fights-Luke one, but is similarly short on evidence.

∙ Rey turns to the Dark Side. 

If not Luke, why not Rey? She has a special connection to Kylo Ren, and Star Wars has always been about falls and redemptions.

∙ Kylo Ren turns to the Light Side.

It’s like the Rey theory but, like, opposite! A redemption arc for Kylo Ren seems inevitable, but it could just as easily be in store for Episode IX.

∙ Snoke is Darth Plagueis.

See, Darth Plagueis is a Sith Lord mentioned in the prequel who—you know what? It doesn’t matter, because we already know Snoke isn’t a Sith.

Are any of these worth the bandwidth it takes to display them? That’s hard to say. All we know for sure is that they’re fun to consider, and that we’ll get at least some of the answers when we return to a galaxy far, far away on December 14th.

(images: Lucasfilm)

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—The Mary Sue has a strict comment policy that forbids, but is not limited to, personal insults toward anyone, hate speech, and trolling.—

EPISODE 4: MATTERHORN APPEARS TO BE CANNIBALIZING - NICK

Well I don't know what the fuck just happened. All day people have been saying it's Abel, that he's 100% going home, and I've been so scared that people have been barely talking to me but Luke convinced me it was fine. I've put so much trust in him. I've come to him with like, dumbass plans that I've been considering that he could use against me to like, murder me in this game. And then tonight I'm one of only THREE votes for abel out of EIGHT and ci'ere goes home. Apparently he convinced literally everyone that i was 100% with him in blindsiding zack, so they all left me out. Now I'm on the bottom. Luke and Zack INSISTED that they still wanna work with me and that they trust me and believe that I wasn't with Ci'ere, but I'm still so scared. I wanna trust Luke especially, but fuck. I have no idea what to do.

I'm glad this swap just happened. Now I'm with Trent, who wholeheartedly believes that I was never apart of this majority alliance, and I can definitely work with him. Logan's there, which I think is good, but it's kind of tricky because I know we could be seen as a pair and he's always nervous to work with me because of that one time I exploded on him. Nick is here, and I know him vaguely and he seems happy that we're together. Lily is here, and we worked together in Solomon so hopefully I can work with her. I'm trying to repair things with Abel, and he seems willing to work with me but I'm not sure if I 100% believe that.

Luke is on exile, and I honestly hope he ends up here even if it means going to tribal. Because if I can live through another tribal, I think it would be worth it to repair our relationship and get my number 1 back. It's good to have someone you can 100% trust.

AHH this tribe swap truly sucks. the only person i actually kinda trust on my tribe is abel.. and logan and i have history from a past game so i don't think he trusts me at all. i would just love to win this immunity because three tribals in a row is so annoying.. let me get some of this monte rosa luck so i can actually not have to do another tribal this week PLEASE. also daisy is sketchy af but I'm gonna try to work with her for now... we'll see

I hate being on tribes with daisy. ANYWHO.

I found an idol clue and guess what? I refuse to do it.

Also, Daisy is treating me like shit. I refuse to make promises based on friendship anymore because it fucked me in Emathia. I can't do it anymore.

Damn they took out C'iere :(

BUUUUUT WE SWAPPED! I knew it was coming!

I'm swapped into the new Matterhorn tribe with Tyler, Brett, Dom, Ashley Sarah and Max!! With us are og Matterhorn Zack and Jev.

This swapped couldn't have worked out very perfectly!! We're 6v2 and even if there's an idol we have the numbers to split the vote safetly!

The moment the tribes swapped Dom talked to me about solidyfying the 6 of us original Monte Rosa members.

Me before swap: I kinda wanna target Dom just for kicks

Me after swap: I'm gonna work with Dom and see where that gets me

lol I'd be an idiot to not stay with og Monte Rosa considering the numbers. But I'm still gonna keep my options open. I bonded with Zack and he's been probing on what's happened on my tribe, I gave him brief answers that were kinda vague because I don't want to get caught or him spilling everything. But Zack seems cool since his best friends with Renee and I adore Renee so much!! I'm open to possibly working with him. But right now I'm sticking with og Monte Rosa.

EPISODE 4

Ci'ere has now been voted off. I've never played with him before, but I know he's a hometown girl from Long Beach, so I might have considered working with the guy.

At this point, it has been amazing to have gone 3-0 at the challenges. We'd been talking amongst Monte Rosa about the possibility of a tribe swap and Lily, the Dr. Fun of our tribe, has rolled their eyes at it, saying "A tribe swap at 17 doesn't make sense. That would never happen." Well Lily can eat it because that's exactly what happened. Before the swap, the advantage I received in the last round was revealed to me: If I desired, I could purposefully put myself on exile to have immunity for the fourth round. I determined that since I possess a hidden immunity idol, it was more important for me to develop social connections with my tribe than to take a few days off. I am now a "proud" member of the Disney Shitbox tribe that is Matterhorn and my tribemates include Ashley Sarah, Dom, Ian, Max, and Tyler from the original Monte Rosa and original Matterhorn members Jevvon and Zack. Both of them seem cool, Zack especially. Not much to report on that front.

The challenge was a maze face-off. As I'd never done a maze challenge before, I figured it honestly couldn't be that difficult. I told my tribe to put me in whichever slot that wanted. That ended up being the second most difficult position--fair enough. When I had finished getting ready to go out on Saturday, I figured the maze wouldn't take longer than a few minutes and so I opted to give it a shot. Not today, Satan. That maze SUCKED and after 5 minutes, I determined I was over it and opted to forfeit. Oh well! I had plans! I have this habit of being either the best or the worst at a given challenge. I was awesome at the scavenger hunt and at endurance tasks. I was the worst at Winterbells and mazes. Can't be good at everything, I guess? Fortunately, our Matterhorn tribe prevailed and I am now 4-0 at challenge wins. How wonderful is that? New Monte Rosa will go to tribal council and I there are two pairs of former season castmates on that tribe--Benjamin and Trent from Kiribati and Daisy and Lily from Solomon Islands. I'm more concerned about the latter because that season was super recent and if they have a bond from that, Lily could potentially flip and that could be the end of Logan, Nick, or Benjamin. We'll have to see what happens.

fuck this matterhorn tribe. i fucking hate all of these people except jev and ashley sarah. i literally don't like these people at all and i know they're going to vote me out so it's whatever. fuck off.

Whew last nights tribal was wild, and to top it off we had a swap... while I was ASLEEP!!!

I feel bad for voting out Ci'ere after saying I could see him being my #1 ally but rumours were circulating that he was trying to get one of Me/Zack/Luke out and I wasn't about to let that happen so... I once again went with majority, sorry Ci'ere!

Anyways, so now I'm on a swapped tribe I am panicked af because I'm on the wrong side of the numbers along with Zack so rip. But hopefully I can use my social skills and work something out in the worst case scenario that we end up going to tribal, which may be easier than it sounds since none of the people from Monte-Rosa have been to tribal yet this season which could mean they'll be a little easier to fit in with because they might not be as strong as they appear!

WE TRIBE SWAPPED!!!! So what it looks like is New MR is 4/4 split, but Abel spilled some tea saying that Trent and Daisy tried to vote him out last round. I really like Abel and would enjoy working with him, but he def is a threat in the long run so I gotsa to watch out for that (he could make a good meat shield for me though). Abel, Ben, and I were really wanting to work together pregame so i think that may come into fruition soon. I am really glad I have Ben and Logan on my tribe because they were probs some of my biggest assets on original MR. Daisy has been acting fishy about the advantage from the last challenge with Logan which makes me think that she could probs have it. She also seemed really quick to pinpoint blame onto Abel which is shifty. I also have Trent on my tribe... although he has been against Abel, somebody i want to work with, I have pretty good connections with him and we both have mutual friends. Renee is also on our tribe, which I think Abel alluded to working closely with... but I am keeping my eyes pealed because she is a comp threat to my knowledge. Also Trent and Ben are both from Kiribatitty which could pose a threat because they are probs pretty close allies. As much as I want to micromanage this tribe and control the divisions/majority I know that I need to lay low in order to make it farther in this game. I just need to go with the flow and not go into ultimate 1000xxxx game overdrive.

Let's hope the majority of our old tribe gets us a win!!!!

The plan at last tribal council to vote out Ci'ere went perfectly. He was being really shady in PMs with Renee and telling her that Zack, Jev and I are a trio that were controlling the things going on on our tribe which was semi-true but then he was being extra shady by messaging several different people telling them that he was their closest ally like sis...wyd? So he had to go but in the process I had to blindside Daisy. Daisy is a pretty paranoid person anyway when it comes to a vote so orchestrating a blindside like that was something I don't think she would have done so we have to leave her out.

Then....as Daisy started messaging me about the vote and what happened...the Gods above (aka the hosts) decided that would be a perfect time for a tribe swap and BAM I get put onto Exile Island. Not only do I not have to explain myself to Daisy yet but I can chill and relax for a few days. Hopefully none of my allies or people I would like to work with go home but ahhh. I'd love unite with either Tyler, Ian, Zack and Dom on the Matterhorn tribe or I'd love to be with Logan, Nick, Abel and Daisy on the Monte Rosa tribe. Put me whereever and I should be good to go.

i am so bad at submitting these omg....

so anyways my game has been moving kind of slow. i wanted to just lay low and avoid getting targeted but that somehow put me on the bottom of my old tribe so now ive gotta start chatting it up with these people. the good news is i actually like most of them? other than abel and renee who left me out of a plan i feel like i could potentially be in a good spot. i LOVE logan and daisys grown on me so i see a trio working out there. benjamin is someone close to me from kiribati and nick and i are both in a group chat together so we have that working out for us. right now the numbers are tied and daisy and i seem to be the ones in control of how this vote shapes out. i personally would like to corral myself daisy logan and nick and possibly benjamin to vote out the others but i dont see the people from monte rosa being so willing to hand a tribal majority in this tribe over to original matterhorns. one could dream though.

i'm just happy to be off matterhorn. the tribe was very obviously being controlled by jev/zack and everyone else seemed to be like..... very eager to follow them? idk i wasnt having it. zack definitely has the idol and he wont tell me that so as soon as we're reunited i'm definitely gonna use that to my advantage. unless that idol is being played on me or its in my pocket it does me no good, so we're gonna have to flush that shit! or just find a way to get rid of zack i guess! this tribe smells like a good opportunity for me

Yeesh. Great. We gotta deal with tribal.

I think this should be a relatively easy one, though? Renee doesn't seem to be really talking at all (they haven't messaged me at all in PMs, not even to say hi), so they should be an easy target that people might wanna go for. I just hope I'm not on the chopping block.

i hate myself y'all motherfuckers better vote someone else off

Whew. Tribal. On one hand, I'm kinda glad because it means I get to work on my relationship with Luke. On the other hand, it means I'm at risk once again. I'm hoping that since I won my maze and since I've been pretty active and helpful in the tribe chat that the original Monte Rosa's won't want me to go, or at least won't see reason for me to go. I'm just nervous because even though Abel said he forgives me, I can't know that for sure. I would love to get him out just because it would give me piece of mind of being targeted but I don't know if I can get the numbers, or if I can get people on board. Also, it might make me a target if I go out there trying to get out someone who I have a grudge against or whatever, since apparently the people from Monte Rosa didn't have any divisions since there was no tribal. It's their first tribal, and I don't wanna make it seem like I'm playing too hard.

Lily brought up Renee, since she barely talked. And I'd be okay with that, if it meant keeping me safe another round. But having Abel makes me so scared that he's paranoid.

I brought up Abel to Lily because from what I understand Lily is a pretty trustworthy person and I know her somewhat well. Although it does seem like the majority wants Renee. Well, you know what happened the last few times the majority wanted someone. He stayed. Thanks to me. So we'll see what happens.

So Logan tells me Abel has being throwing out my name. And of course he has. I knew he was lying to me. It might be too risky to push for Abel though. Apparently he's really tight with Renee, as multiple people told me not to tell him the majority is for Renee. And apparently they're so tight that he would be kinda screwed without her. So even though Abel is who I really want gone, I'll go for Renee to keep myself safe and to hopefully take him down a peg.

Ayy turns out the switch has proved to be not as bad as I expected, we won!! Ahh it feels so good to be safe, I'm so proud of us all!

Okay, so i have to go to tribal.... keep it i don't want it. I think its going to be a messy vote because it appears that Daisy and Abel are both fighting one another or something (partly because I've fueled the fire by telling Abel that she was telling people he has an advantage and that Daisy wants to vote Renee). So I am glad that Matterhorn appears to be cannibalizing, but I am kind of stuck in between the two sides with Ben. On one side is Abel and Renee who are both good at this game for different reasons and on the other side is Daisy and Lily (along with possibly Logan) which to my knowledge are really tight allies. I think that Abel wants to work with me far into this game, but for him to stay Ben and Trent would need to vote with us, which I feel is somewhat difficult because Trent literally just voted out Abel??? I really don't want to be on the wrong side of a close vote this early into the game, and like I know Logan and I are really close, but they supposedly made a promise to Daisy not to vote them out this round, which is like annoying because I have less leeway on how I want to vote... basically I don't have my tag-a-long if i want to get out somebody like daisy. I am glad that my name isn't in the mesh (at least to my knowledge) and that nobody from original Monte Rosa appears to be in too much trouble this vote. I just hope I choose the right side... Play safe, vote with Logan and get out a potential threat for the long run competition game, possibly ruin connections with Abel, and potentially enabling a Lily/Daisy control later in the game OR voting with Abel and hoping the votes fall that way and get out Daisy who I think has an advantage and possible connections with a lot of other people, i.e. Lily, Logan, Trent, and maybe even Luke too. To make things more confusing on myself I am attempting to perpetuate 3some alliances between Ben, Logan, myself ... Abel, Ben, myself ... Abel, Trent, myself.

Yay we won immunity! Us og Monte Rosa also solidified our alliance of 6!!

But that's not what I'm seriously pumped about...

Zack just showed me an IDOL CLUE!! I was like omg why does this keep happening to me! I really do have mad social skills! We deduced the content and figured out that Ashley could possibly have the idol because she was ranked 3rd in the ranking and she needed to lose which she did. More so she was the one who made the ranking!!

Zack and I also solidified our trust with one another! I'm not that ready to put my whole trust in him but I'll be watching his back if he has mine.

Thank god renee put in a good word for me to Zack. Bless her!

So I know I've been procrastinating writing these and life has just been so busy. But none the less I'm so happy and pumped to have not had to go to TC yet.

Not to mention this swap couldn't have worked out any better for me! Ian, connected with him from the start. Especially knowing he's Josh's little brother who I adore! And then there's Brett who's such a bae and who I really hit it off with. Especially once I realized we both had the idol clue at the first challenge! XD It immiediatly pulled us together bc I was more than willing to make sure he had the idol and know I would be on his side! Then there's Ashley Sarah who's super super friendly. I just love her vibe. I'm hoping at some point the 4 of us can make something official!

Also it's interesting that our tribe is entering this swap with a 6 - 2 tribe advantage. Which is another blessing in this game I've had so far! Jevon and Zack are the only 2 new members of the tribe. And early today there was an alliance chat created excluding Jevon and Zack. So I'd say it's likely they may be one of the first to go? But at the same time idk bc I'm not sure that I'd be willing to vote out Zach who I'm mutually tied to by Brian Ruvolo. There could possibly be a working I think there's somewhat of an awkward tension between the 2 of us, even af we spoke for the first time before the game started, I think there

Okay, since Daisy and Logan supposedly have amends not to vote each other out this round or some BS, I got the target to shift to Trent. It should be Ben, Logan, Myself, Renee, and Abel. Hopefully this all works accordingly and I can survive my first tribal in a TS Main Season.

We did that!!! I think the tribes are a little more even now so we're gonna have to step up our game!! Plus they are getting like now.

it feels weird winning immunity lskdhfg. i don't know what to do.. sitting here relaxing is new for me!

as for the other tribe.. i really hope abel and renee are safe :(

i hope they go for daisy or nick. we can't let dom nick and daisy make merge together... they're best friends so i really hope that tribe uses their common fucking sense...

i feel like people are plotting against me but everyones just relaxing.. i could get use to this.

Danielle from Huffington UK, show yourself!! I'll buy you a pint, and twiglets!!! Joke aside, this article made me chuckle and it’s good to see the reylo tag acknowledged.

Return of the plot twist. by  Danielle Grufferty

Note: this piece *hopefully* contains spoilers for Star Wars: The Last Jedi

We are blessed to live in such times. Sure there’s Brexit, Trump, while Boris Johnson, our beloved Foreign Secretary quotes Kipling on state visits to former colonies. But life has its blessings - for one thing, we’re among the lucky few in history who are able to speculate about what’s going to happen in the next Star Wars film. Imagine if Twitter had existed in the late 70s, I’m sure people would have been all over the theory that Luke and Leia were brother and sister.

I’m sure you enjoyed as much as I did, giving into the dark side, (ignoring both your better, and Rian Johnson’s, judgement) by watching the trailer this week. This is a rare moment in history, there were no surprises when (spoiler alert) little Anakin turned to the dark side. There’s questions that need answering, and pronto. The mystery of Rey’s parentage is (apparently) a done deal, and besides there are larger issues at play here.

Firstly, does Rey dislike sand as much as her grandfather, Darth Vader, did? Has Rey inherited all of her grandfather’s special set of skills? And why did Luke turn full absent father, and abandon his daughter on a desert planet despite the fact that his family has a deeply troubled history with sand?

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So how will the great “I am your father” moment be revealed? We know the filmmakers’ task is a big one. We’ve already had an identical twist in the original trilogy, so the stakes are high. The sentence will need to be delivered in a different and unique way, despite the fact that it will be the exact same words, just replacing Luke with Rey (Yes okay, I know that is not the actual line!)

I can see how it is going to be play out, (this is what it must feel like to have a force vision.) Perhaps late in Act III;

“Rey, I am your father.” (Luke)

“Rey, I am your cousin.” (Kylo)

I’m not sure I could cope with the shock of finding out Rey is Kylo Ren’s cousin. Although come to think of it, Luke and Leia grew up in different systems and turned out to be brother and sister so perhaps every character in this galaxy are at least distant cousins?

But let’s be serious for a moment and discuss what form a possible twist could take. Before anyone goes off on one, quoting emo Kylo Ren at me, he’s now carrying a scar (like Harry Potter) which makes him look even more dangerous/attractive.

As much as our villain may resist it, Kylo Ren remains the son of a princess and a penniless nerf herder. (I assume a nerf herder is the equivalent of a stable boy in this galaxy). I know I’m not the only one who noticed his shiny locks, luscious lips and the pout... I could go on. Disney has done wonders with royalty before this, and while Rey may be the chief protagonist of this space opera, it is Kylo Ren who is the Disney Prince in this fairytale.

Besides chances are that Ben Solo not only inherited his parents’ good looks but some of their most endearing personality traits too. Are the filmmakers really not going to let us see any of the good in the young Skywalker? And would it really be worth living in a universe where Jar Jar Binks lives but Ben Solo dies?

Besides, and this for me is irrefutable evidence, Rey’s grown up sorting out rusty bits of metal, she knows what she’s doing here.

The aptly-named Reylo theory* (the theory that Rey and Kylo Ren will have “a relationship” in the saga) is painted by the “antis” (those who think Reylo is evil, woah chill) as something solely created and fuelled by “the girls”. This of course feeds the whole narrative around Star Wars and gender. Apparently women cannot watch science fiction/anything without romanticising it, because that’s what “girls” do. These gendered assertions inevitably sit comfortably alongside the idea that Star Wars is “not a girl thing”.

This debate has a touch of irony to it, in that the (largely male) critics of the theory fail to understand that being a supporter of “Reylo” does not mean that you think Rey and Kylo Ren are going to ride off into the binary sunset together (though if it has to happen, can it be on Ren’s TIE silencer please). Basically, these chaps among the “antis” seem to think that a relationship always equals romance, which seems odd. Anyway, a discussion for another time/tumblr.

To the delight of many, the trailer seems to be offering fans hints that this tale will not fit the classic hero/villain trope. Perhaps the fans do indeed need preparation for the moment they realise their beloved Han was slayed not by the villain, but the Byronic hero of this story. And who doesn’t love not one, but two Byronic heroes because as has been said before, our two protagonists represent “two halves of the dark and the light”.

But the possible hint of what is to come at the end of the trailer that dropped this week, could be a cause for concern. If it’s hinted at, it’s not really a twist is it? Like Trump, Brexit and Corbyn’s electability, have I called it wrong once again? A relationship between them may be a risky strategy when as George Lucas has often said, Star Wars are films for 12 year olds. I guess all we can continue to count on are cryptic tweets from Rian Johnson, who this week teased us with a modern interpretation of Romeo and Juliet. The plot thickens.

People put a lot of effort and faith into history’s great theories. I’m beginning to know how Stephen Hawking felt with his work on relativity, and Star Wars exists on an even larger galactic scale. Like General Leia, one can only live in hope.

* I’ve only posted the #reylo tumblr tag but there is TONNES of evidence out there if you are interested, so all credit to the Reylo community - check out the links in the description of this video.