#ITS THE STINKY MAN BDAY! | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

thegetoufather · 2 years

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My pussy is quivering for stoner getou 😩🥵

SLEEPER HIT

getou suguru x f!reader

warnings: smut, 18+/minors and ageless blogs dni, drug use, reader and getou shotgun, corruption, dub con elements with the drug use at the end, richboy au with getou and gojo (the curse crew are humans), is this hurt/comfort? idk this is new for me

a/n: damn me the fuck too nonnie. idk if this is what you were going for but this is what i thought of. happy early western hemisphere bday getou bby i love all versions of you even if i make you a lil stinky

Getou never understood the appeal that the designer drugs Gojo uses has to him.

Gojo insists it's simply a party habit, but when he sees is friend snort another line off the another nameless set of plush tits, icy blue irises framed by bloodshot sclera as he spreads his lips into a Cheshire grin, getou decides to let his friend live in his delusion a little longer.

Getou understands him when he’s faced with the same pressures Gojo keeps brushing off.

The way the family keeps brushing off the way the ransom on his cousin went south, all the efforts now turned into making him the heir of the company. the chiding from his mother to cut his hair shorter for the pictures, the urges from his father to stand taller and prouder he needs to pose for the magazines.

Getou retaliates to the drive to rise above the masses by sinking.

Blowing off his friends to hang out with the losers he found at the seedy dive bar down the street from the office. He sits in a cloudy gaze of cigarette smoke, drinking whiskey cheaper than the buttons on the shirt as he watches Mahito and Jogo heckle the bartender for free drinks. and then Mahito dangles a roll thicker than a cigarette, twisted at the end to give it a cone appearance.

“Fuck it,” Getou thinks, thick fingertips brushing past Mahito’s slender ones to take the blunt from his finger tips, whipping the lighter he stole from his dad to light the blunt, his large chest rising as he takes a deep inhale.

That one breath is just the beginning, and Getou’s showing up half lidded to stockholder meetings, and spaced out with his dates to you, the girl he’s been set up with since he was sixteen. It was a marriage of convenience but you two found love along the way, but now, its like you never even knew him.

Gojo is no help, of course, he’s just glad his best friend has loosened up, so that leaves you to try and pick up the pieces.

But its too much, he’s a shell of the man you once knew, and it's too much to watch him interrupt you mid conversation to spark a joint, despite how sexy the bob of his Adam's apple is when he exhales. to hear the distant “hmm?” at family dinners when your parents ask about when the wedding is. conversations are about philosophies you never knew he had, and he’s just rambling on, not even caring if you get him.

Your breaking point is when you feel his hands leave your ass, the grip that was driving you to press your pelvis against his abruptly interrupted. Your hips stutter, confused as to why he would stop in the middle like this, until you hear the familiar click of his lighter followed by the shattering of your heart against your ribs.

There's another half hearted thrust into you, the heat of the joint warming the skin of your left hip as getou tries to resume the pace. you smack his hands away, the butt burning your palm as you try to clamber away from him.

But even in his haze, getou knows he loves you, and he can't lose you — you’re the last tether he has. So in his fog, he reaches out for you, strong arm wrapping around your waist to you to his chest, nuzzling into you so he can kiss away the salty tears on your cheeks.

His free hand grips your cheek, turning you towards him so he can see your glassy eyes and wet eyelashes. He's hurt you too, and he can’t bear to live apart any longer. So he takes one more drag, and you can feel his ribcage expand against your back as he fills his lungs. A thumb runs over your swollen lips, parting them so he can press his against yours, pushing the smoke into your mouth with soft circles rubbed on your cheek, so you can take this one breath, together again, and he can drag you right down with him.

#getou suguru x reader #getou x reader #geto x reader #geto suguru x reader #getou suguru x you #getou x you #geto x you #geto suguru x you #jjk x reader #jjk x you #jjk smut #tw drug use #tw corruption #tw dub con

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ubemango · 4 years

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sunlit affair (m)

note: I don’t want to wait for Hobi’s bday to repost this hehe so early bday sex for the nice Aquarius man w a beautiful nose and sick dance moves!!!!! 🥰

PAIRING. hoseok/reader GENRE. romance, domestic au RATED. M WORD COUNT. 2.6k WARNINGS. riding, creampie SUMMARY. Twenty-five is a good look on Hoseok.

Your alarm is set to go off at 9:05 AM.

The ringer is low because Hoseok stumbled into bed with a fatigue that told you he didn’t want to be bothered unless it was the inevitable stream of sunlight that always somehow snuck onto your pillows. It’s an uncanny awakening—you wake up at 8:59, and to the premature strike of light right in your eyes like a premonition, though you always knew what today was.

He’s snoring. Project had gone well, boss is happy. The only words he’d gotten to you other than his good night, please don’t wake me up at midnight I’m so tired. Then he’d knocked out, but you didn’t mind. He deserved it.

Twenty-five is a good look on Hoseok. Not that he looks any older than he has, but the gentle maturing of his face comes in the form of the deepens wrinkles in his eyes, the lines in his forehead. Permanent grooves that only mean he’s getting happier and it makes you happier, too.

The urge to kiss his cheek is strong. You shimmy out of bed as quietly as possible before you give into it: breakfast won’t make itself, and he’ll be awake soon enough.

You opt for scrambled eggs because oil would be too loud. The coffee brews as you arrange the plate in what you hope is an appetizing meal with the sausages Hoseok likes from the co-op, and little slices of strawberries in another bowl—organic, courtesy of his mother dropping by the other day in complaint of your fridge’s lack of hope for anything healthy other than the occasional splurge on asparagus. We’ve been more broke is an odd thing to contend with, but Hoseok has seen how sad you’ve gotten from all your loose corn and tuna meals for god knows how long.

(You take extra care in stirring the sugar in his coffee because now you’re sentimental over the goddamn food in your fridge.)

Hoseok is as new to the world as a baby out the womb, eyes blinking too much because he woke up on the wrong side of the pillow. The sun fighting the sun itself. He smiles when he sees you.

“Happy birthday to you…”

And you sing for him, tray of goodies in your hands as you waddle closer and he sits up to help you place it on his lap. He accepts it with a pout of his lips and a press to yours.

“Happy birthday Hobi,” you say when you break apart, and Hoseok twitches before he remembers there are fragilities on his thighs. He settles with a whine that asks for one more kiss. You give it to him. “I love you.”

“Thank you baby,” he says. He cocks his head in gesture for you to sit next to him. He’s still warm from dreaming. “Smells good.”

“I worked hard. But you worked harder last night.”

“Ugh. Jimin was on my ass and IT had to fix some bug on the computer.” Hoseok jabs sadly at a sausage. “But it’s done. Let’s—not talk about work.”

“Okay. What’s it like being an old man?”

Hoseok grumbles through a mouthful of eggs. “My joints aren’t what they used to be.”

“Sad,” you say. “You’re falling apart.”’

“Hm. This is really good babe. And—no, for real? When I went to the gym the other night?” Hoseok stares at you with eyes that hold a thousand stories. “Could hear my bones cracking.”

“Ew.”

“Click clack.”

“Okay,” you snort. “You’re old. Now finish your coffee. More plans.”

You take the emptied plate when Hoseok tries to slurp on his mug. “Hot.” He makes a broken face.

“It’s coffee.”

He waves you off. Embarrassed but you’ll give it to him. “Thank you. I love you.”

“Mhm. Brush your teeth, I don’t wanna kiss your stinky coffee breath.”

The morning progresses as you wash the dishes. Hoseok finally sheds the grogginess of last night when you hear the faucet turn on from the washroom, and you take the time to contemplate your day. Dinner later is out of the question, a reservation under Yoongi’s name at whatever o’clock because he keeps forgetting to tell you the time. Maybe a quick movie? Because it’s been a while since you had time in with Hoseok. And the bed calls to you anyway. The last plate is put away with much more resolve than you had before.

You barely catch Hoseok coming out when you pin him to the wall with soap-softened hands. His face is damp, hair swept back with a careless hand. Mouth-watering because Hoseok was never not at his peak-handsome. Yours for the morning.

“Woah, mama.” You press a kiss to his neck. You feel his hands around your waist. “Plans, huh.”

“Yeah,” you say. Mouth preoccupied with the taste of him and it warms you from your core. “Can I take care of you?”

“Can I say no?”

“If you want to.”

“I don’t want to,” he says.

And you lead him back to bed; a false promise of rest but hopefully he’ll be blissed out soon enough. Hoseok looks awfully cocky with his satisfied grin, lying down with an ease that says he’ll be at your mercy time-willing. You crawl over his body and settle with the press of your thighs against his hips. His long fingers trace a path on your sides (a shiver he notices with a silent chuckle) when you bend down to push love into his mouth. Spearmint.

“I’ll ride you,” you decide then and there. Hoseok licks into you with more eagerness he seems to want to let on because his eyes are wide. He clicks his tongue.

“You spoil me.”

“Start your morning off right.”

“D-Damn straight,” he murmurs, breath lost when you trail your kisses down his sternum, over a wrinkly shirt he can’t be bothered to take off because he’s so relaxed, melting into the sheets like warm honey. You lift up the fabric to lick at his abs, and you feel him shiver. “Tickles.”

“Sorry.” Hoseok laughs. Then you slide his boxers down and envelope his hard dick with the soft suction of your heat.

“Fuuuuuck—”

You'd say something about him being too provocative but the dick in your mouth keeps you pliant. You don’t want to ruin the moment with any snark, though—and as much as you want to see him fall apart, the slow build-up of his pleasure is a drama on its own. You see the glow of pleasure in Hoseok as his hands rake through your hair, a silent command for your attention and you give it. You give it to him tenfold when your lips reach the base of his shaft.

“Ugh that--feels...” Your tongue presses against the underside of him and his head teeters. “Agh—!”

You swallow before you take a breath, hand pumping him slowly to keep the tip of his dick near your lips because you can’t get enough. Always. “Feel good?”

“Yeah,” he asserts. “Thank you for taking care of me.”

You huff out a laugh. “Don’t thank me yet, bubba. Need you wrapped around my finger.”

And you get back to it; a rough grab for his pleasure if it means you get to see Hoseok twitch under you like he’s here for your mouth only. The slick of your spit on his skin is a wet mess and the sound is even more dirty. A noise you could only appreciate behind closed doors. (Yours isn’t, but you’re wet anyway.)

Hoseok sighs with the pleasure of a catered man. “Fuck that’s—“ he rises onto his elbow with a pant— “I’ll cum soon.”

“Do you wanth to?” Garbled because you won’t let up.

“No—just—come up here.”

He kisses you when you do. His love is rough, the insistence on your lips nearly pushing you back but his hands hold your neck and you sigh, tongue twisting behind your teeth and your knees are caught as you take off your underwear but you can’t pull away. An attraction neither of you can deny when you pull apart to breathe but Hoseok chases you for more.

“Mmph—” he sucks on your top lip and you groan— “Hoseok—wait.”

“What?” He nips down your neck and settles on a spot that has your mind blanking. Suckling. Forgetting this is about him and he seems to be none the wiser.

“Nothing, I just. Let me breathe for a second.”

He settles his forehead against yours. “Have I taken your breath away, baby?”

“Eugh.”

“You like it.”

“I do,” you confirm. “But you’re gonna kill me.”

Hoseok pecks your nose. “I’m a force to be reckoned with.”

“Says the wise guy who tried to chug on coffee and died.”

“You’re supposed to be taking care of me,” he whines. “Don’t make fun.”

“Lie down. And don’t cum until I say so.”

You take his shirt off. And you’re about to remove yours, but Hoseok is squinting and the open blinds are absolutely obliterating his eyes with the rising sun. You get up with a huff to pull them closed. Not without Hoseok calling out for you because now he’s cold, but at least he can sorta see now.

“Now we make love in the dark,” you say.

“And they say chivalry is dead.”

“I hate it when we fuck and it’s bright.”

“So romantic,” Hoseok coos sarcastically. “Now take off your shirt.”

The air is still. No coffee brewing, no static of the TV when it’s on. The outside world is divided from your tryst by your chipped blinds and the flimsy mesh of the window—quiet, even when the occasional car slips into a sinkhole. Hoseok is under you, dark hair splayed along the softness of his pillow and he grins, hands grabbing yours as you settle comfortably on his lap. A scenario you couldn’t have conjured up any other way but somehow, in this simple abode, you’re flushed with this heavy feeling of love. Love for this man and your home and he’s probably so tired but he gives into you. All the time.

“Stop thinking so hard,” he says.

You laugh. “What am I thinking about?”

“I donno. But you look pensive.”

“Ooh.” You line his dick up with your core. Sinking down like you have the whole day to contemplate all the good ridges of his length. “I’ll tell you when I’m done fucking your brains out.”

Hoseok snorts. “You’ll nag me when your thighs start to hurt.”

“And what about it?”

“I like an honest partner,” he says.

“So you don’t think I can fuck your brains out.”

“Not without my help.”

“What’d I say before? Don’t cum until I say so.” You lift up a little, settling your bum on his thighs and Hoseok groans. You start like that: a rise of your knees, pussy squeezed and you know he feels it from the way his breath is stunted. You feel it all. And he looks good in this lighting, the barely-there glow of the light like no one’s meant to see him except you. You defile him in your presence alone, and Hoseok takes it.

He bucks up when you slam down hard. “Shit—ugh you feel so good.”

You might say something but you’re scared you’ll falter. You settle for a moan when the tip of his cock hits deeper, nails digging into the back of his hands and he squeezes back. Eyes rolling back when you grind into it, but now you can’t hold back. “Oh fuck.”

Your thighs don’t hurt yet, but you settle your hands back onto his thighs and swirl your hips the way you know he likes to see. And he erupts. “Fuck babe—you’re so hot. Oh—squeeze me—like that. Shiiiit.” Hoseok grabs your ass and you catch yourself on his chest, cuss on the tip of your tongue but he beats you with even more dirty words. “Fuck yourself with my dick.”

You gasp when he pushes into you again. “I’m s-supposed to be taking care of you.”

“Rescinded. I just want you to cum.”

Well. That’s okay too. And you ride him in earnest, dragging your pussy up and down and the ache in your muscles is starting, but Hoseok’s panting under you and it’s all you can do not to stop. His eyes are on your tits, soft bounce for soft bounce—one hand snaking its way up from the grip on your butt to pinch a hard nipple and you squeak.

“Hoseok—”

“That good?”

“Yes—!”

His other thumb is on your clit. Feet moving up behind you and you feel his knees digging into your back every time you come down, and now he’s thrusting up into you too, like he wants you to lose it all over him. “Can you cum like this?”

“Fuck—yeah. Y-Yeah.”

“Tell me when.”

It’s soon. And you can’t say anything because nothing registers in your head other than the feeling of Hoseok fucking into you like he’s possessed, brows furrowed, concentration honed in on you and him and your sweat and love, so much love. It’s the way he knows how to hit it there—

“Oh my god.”

Closer. And your hands are on his shoulders because now you’re tired, and Hoseok takes it in stride when he grabs your hips to keep you where he wants. Unsteady and steady all at the same time when your body tries to keep up, bearing down when his hips cant up, but the grind to your clit is too much. You know he feels it.

“There?”

“Mhm. Y-Yeah—!”

“Tell me when. Tell me when.” He’s desperate. You feel it too, the way his rhythm picks up and in your wont of clenching when you’re close he groans even more. “Fuck baby I can’t last—”

And you know it. You’re so wet the slide is of his cock is embarrassingly quick but it touches all your sweetest parts. The part in you that’s close is almost there—almost—

“There—oh Hoseok—I’m—cumwithmecumwithme—”

“Fuck babe—”

You collapse, Hoseok bringing his arms around you, breaths lost in your hair as he pumps himself through orgasm and you’re helpless—caught in the whirlwind of your own as you moan into his neck and it’s so hot, the sound of his cum fucked into you. Deep inside and you groan at how sticky you feel all over. Hoseok presses a kiss to your head.

“Congrats, you just fucked the shit out of me,” he says.

You laugh. “And my reward?”

“My semen.”

“Attractive.”

He pulls out. A mess you’ll clean up later because for now you seek refuge in Hoseok’s arms. “But now you’re not thinking so hard.”

“You’re right.” It’s light, the feeling. Like everything’s gonna be fine. A good orgasm does that to you, but now you’re sentimental all over again. “I think I’m ovulating.”

“Oh.”

“Besides the point. But I—don’t know. I just got really emotional.”

“Like you do.”

“Like I do,” you hiss because he always makes fun of you for being more feels-y than you like to let on. “I’m glad I get to do life with you, I guess.”

Hoseok stares at you. Gaze soft and unyielding, like he knows exactly what you’re going through. “You’ll make me cry.”

You scrunch your nose. “Do it, pussy.”

“I love you,” he says through a half-laugh. “So goddamn much.”

And Hoseok smothers you with a thousand kisses, and you feel his cum on your stomach as he rolls over you but you don’t resent him at all. Only if it means you’re getting his love. That’s all that matters this morning.

#bts smut #hoseok smut #bts scenarios #hoseok scenarios #ubemango fic #f: sunlit affair

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dangan-roommates · 5 years

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It’s stinky man’s (Souda’s) Bday!!! Happy birf!

Its his birthday

#danganronpa #sdr2 #hajime hinata #kazuichi soda #gundham tanaka #he's 23 now

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n8nt · 4 years

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I seen your art for stinky man's birthday! Could we get more of him and Crypto together for his b-day? Sweet loves for an old man 💚

I'm completely out of art juice and anything I would do would be way too late for the day after caustics bday, but I want you to know that him and wattson totally planned an entire day for the three of them to hang out

like before caustic can even refuse cryptos making pancakes and wattson's made coffee. they got him new glass beakers because hed complain about anything else and it was something he actually needed. then they spend a few hours doing nerdy shit and experiments and their own work in the same room just chillin. and THEN its movie night, in which wattson leaves after a while to........give em some privacy ;));););););))););)));) ;). as she leaves she gives crypto a wink and hes like 😳

#bday kisses....for the bday science man #captain calls #im not tagging this one #cryptic #maybe ill doodle somethinf for this later but #this ask was too cute to let it get sat on and ignored while i stress over not being able to draw something for it #they just wanna make sure he knows hes loved and cared about yknow #cuz you forget sometimes. even if you dont think it matters #cuz it do

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jimiin · 4 years

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💌 𝒾𝓃𝒸𝑜𝓂𝒾𝓃𝑔 ⟶ 𝐨𝐧𝐞 𝐧𝐞𝐰 𝐦𝐞𝐬𝐬𝐚𝐠𝐞 ...

at 7:30 pm 𝔁𝓪𝓷 said : if u see this keep scrolling unless ur julie then pls read aha .. happy birthday @lovesjoon !

im such a fool not posting this in time for it to still be ur bday where u are but thats just the way the pussy crumbles i guess ! i really wanna take the time to add in all the cute emojis not only bc u are the emoji queen but bc u made me love using emojis too .... but i also want this to be heartfelt and if i have to pause to copy and paste emojis im gonna get distracted whew .. insert pleading emoji here </3 HAPPY BIRTHDAY JULIE !!!!! let me start there hehe i really do hope u had the best day today u really deserve it im so glad u skipped school u have the biggest brain baby JSBDJWBDJWBDJWD and if today wasnt that great for whatever reason i really do hope this new year u are entering is the best one yet filled with much better days !!! its truly .. wild that we’ve only been talking for real for like a year bc we’ve been mutuals so long and i would love seeing u on my dash !! i really did love ur blog i rmr if we ever had any vague interactions id be like !!! bc i wanted to be ur friend but alas i do not talk to strangers like that .. SJBDJWBJWBWJDJW unfortunate things had to happen to bring us together finally but it was literally so okay and worth it bc i really clicked with u and u introduced me to jane too and then i introduced diana to u guys it was just .. truly beautiful like it all felt really natural and easy which !!!! isnt always the case yk like we clicked right away and im more comfy with u today than with ppl ive been friends with for like 7+ years which says a lot about ur friendship and u as a person !!!! ur so genuine, literally an angel u are so kind sometimes to a fault ):< and ur so funny truly talking to u is always so fun for me ive never felt awkward with u or bored & i think that out of everyone i talk to i feel like ur the person who gets what im thinking best & that we tend to agree about almost everything which is <3333 omg i feel like this is the most scattered message im so rusty i havent written messages for ppl in so long but this is the first bday im celebrating with u i have to write a love letter !!! im just super grateful to have met u & to be as close as we are today i stand by the fact that u are somehow a gemini too i dont care WHAT the stars say u have a gemini brain baby girl ... JSBDJWBJDBJWBDJWDBJWBW and that is so sexy of u . amen ! not to be all straight man and straight girl in a cringey relationship but ur crazy ... matches my crazy .. u have spectacular bobbies and a heart to match <3 its okay that u bully me in group settings i love being sexy in private aha x i wanted to write u a poem but that would be a disaster i havent written poetry since i graduated and i would rather die than give u a poem i think sucks so maybe next year ... JDBJWBDJWBDJWBDJWDBWJ i love u so much stinky ( with affection ) i cant wait to make new memories with u !! <3333333 stay sexy ..

(thats us btw)

#julie #im such a fool pls pretend u live in the est timezone aha... JDBJWJBJWBJDD #also im !!! not super happy with how this turned out i feel like #my thoughts didnt translate as well as they could have ):#but i hope u know u are loved !! a bunch !! by me !!#happy birthday best fishy girl <3333

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jessiewre · 4 years

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Day 19

Thurs 23rd Jan - Bujies Bday 🍰🎁🎂🎈🎉🐫🤡

Woke up thinking about hummus. Mmm hummus, with some chilli sauce and lemon juice on it yum - the first time I’ve craved any food from home so far.

Headed to breakfast and there was zero hummus on the menu of course, so I foolishly tried to be healthy by ordering the granola fruit option. Yawn. Not my vibe at all .

The jealousy when Phil’s oniony tomato pepper omelette arrived was strong.

Mine was beautifully presented in a glass but you can’t taste beautiful presentation can you. It was actually ok, quite nice but who am I kidding, I’m not the girl that eats fruit for breakfast. Lesson learned. Phil let me have one mouthful of his and it tasted like crack cocaine, nothing quite like just one bite of something to make it taste disproportionally like the best thing you’ve ever tried.

My legs were still massively sore from our stupid volcano trek, so Phil agreed through a forced smile to rub them. Thanks Phil.

You would think going out with a physio had major perks but I’d say his enthusiasm for physio seems to dip like an African bed the moment he’s out of work.

We realised we were getting tight for time as were aiming for the 10am bus to Kibuye, so went to reception to pay the bill.

And realised we did not have enough money on us to pay the bill.

Phil frantically tried to get the paypal app which was taking a while to set up and I think the guy saw the litres of sweat on Phil’s brow and took pity on us.

He said Don’t worry, get the boda driver to take you to an ATM and they can bring the money back for us. Go get your bus.

Now its that kind for trust and kindness that makes you feel warm inside.

Got the bodas to the ATM then the bus station just about by 10am, rushed in trying to find then bus - but then it turned out the bus was at 10:30am so we were fiiiine.

It was definitely NOT our favourite bus journey.

The lady in front of Phil spat out her window at least 5 times in the first 5 minutes and the 5th one hit Phil’s (open) window and narrowly missed going in and hitting him in the face. He was not happy and was like Please stop spitting it’s going to hit me, stop it.

The rest of the journey she hawked and gobbed into her bag or her scarf and it was RANK and Phil became convinced we would catch something off her - so he INSISTED we spent the whole journey with Froggie the scarf over our noses and mouths. We looked like such paranoid muzungus, the only whiteys on the bus and we had our faces covered. I guess the trip to Congo with all the Ebola signs partnered with the news about the new China virus had put us on high alert.

At one of the stopped points, I saw a man on the street who’d legs were completely deformed and he walked on his hands with flip flops as his gloves. His legs were extremely thin and not useable, bent in a cross legged position under him. His knees were dragging along the concrete floor. He didn’t even seem to be begging and I watched as he shuffled in between massive buses, god knows how he hadn’t been hit and killed by a vehicle. It looked so difficult and uncomfortable and it made me feel sad. Our bus sat there a few more minutes so I quickly got off and found him to give him a note.

Got to Kibuye and saw an old metal drum with MEG written on. Shout out to Meg there.

We jumped on some bodas and went to Hotel Saint Jean for 500 francs (50p).

I was wellllll hungry by then obvs so went to the hotel restaurant while Phil was shown some room options. I took control and ordered a vege burger with fries, n avocado salad and spaghetti napolitana. We’d heard food in Rwanda should be ordered like 3 hours before you actually wanted it so needed to get the order in pronto.

The spaghetti was the ultimate basic bitch spaghetti, like they have waved the spaghetti in front of a tomato, so I avoided that dish. The avocado salad was bizarre but actually pretty good, was two halves of a HUGE avocado with the empty pit rather filled in with a dressing like a pond. The vege burger was ok, the better dish by a long shot.

So when we’d finished I told the waiter the spaghetti wasn’t very good and scapered to our room.

A lovely room with a huge bed and balcony view high over the lake and...a crazy smell of stinky drain coming from the bathroom.

FFS.

GOOD CHOICE PHIL.

Phil was too keen for a shower and so we kept the bathroom door closed at all times and told the manager before we went to dinner that the drain needed sorting pleeeeease.

They treated the drain and sprayed the room which ensured the smell was gone for at least 5 minutes.

Spoke to Bujie the Birthday Boy who was on his way for a family meal at PIZZA EXPRESS woop woop livin’ an lovin’ life with a strong 30% discount voucher, cos even on a birthday, the Wretham’s gotta get a good deal maaaan.

Dinner was a vege soup for me, carrot soup for Phil and then a vege curry with currified rice. Was pretty good but then maybe I was still comparing everything to the worst pasta so far so everything else seemed to be AMAZING.

Tried to watch an episode of Dark on Netflix before bed but when the teenagers on it decided to go hang out at some freaky haunted caves, we couldn’t be arsed to watch it, would rather dream about hummus - so we turned it off to go to sleep. In a bed that DOESN’T have the African dip in the middle omg we were gonna sleep like babiesssss.

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ninatastic · 5 years

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@kay-licious how dare u (thanks <3) @silent-calling youre doing amazing sweetie

1. Are looks important in a relationship?

I wouldnt call it a key factor but it’s important to feel attraction towards your partner

2. Are relationships ever worth it?

sure! If it’s a healthy one definitely :D

3. Are you a virgin?

nah

4. Are you in a relationship?

yeh!

5. Are you in love?

I’d say so!

6. Are you single this year?

7. Can you commit to one person?

yes

8. Describe your crush

it me bf

9. Describe your perfect mate

same as above c:

10. Do you believe in love at first sight?

no, only when it comes to animals c;

11. Do you ever want to get married?

thats a dream of mine tbh

12. Do you forgive betrayal?

I guess every healthy person would say no but yes, I’d absolutely do (only the first time tho, after the second time you gotta ask yourself if it’s really worth it)

13. Do you get jealous easily?

in regard to my bf: I used to but it’s a hell of a lot less nowadays. In regard to people in general, sometimes, especially when im not doing well mentally

14. Do you have a crush on anyone?

me bf

15. Do you have any piercings?

just have my ears pierced!

16. Do you have any tattoos?

no but maybe soon

17. Do you like kissing in public?

only if its sweet forehead or cheek kisses, or quick kisses on the mouth or hand kisses

20. Do you shower every day?

yes though I gotta admit I really have to force myself. Not because I like being stinky but because everything is kinda difficult sometimes

21. Do you think someone has feelings for you?

bruh I sure hope my bf does;;

22. Do you think someone is thinking about you right now?

nah

23. Do you think you can last in a relationship for 6 months and not cheat?

I’ve been in a relationship for 5 and a half years now, I think so

24. Do you think you’ll be married in 5 years?

it is possible but who tf knows

25. Do you want to be in a relationship this year?

idk, to be frank: I think my life would be a bit easier if I wasnt in a relationship, or if I hadnt been in a relationship for the past 1-2 years. And I often feel like im more of a burden to my bf than anything else. But thats a different story

26. Has anyone told you they don’t want to ever lose you?

as in losing touch with me? I guess so

27. Has someone ever written a song or poem for you?

a song yes and it was awkward as hell ajhajdfha and people have done drawings for me which is <3<3<3<3<3<<3<3<33

28. Have you ever been cheated on?

Yup

29. Have you ever cheated on someone?

very very unfortunately yes, and just like a bunch of you guys I was this close to killing myself. I was in a very bad place which I know is not an excuse for this. I still think about it even if it’s been a time since then but I think I cqan never forgive myself because of that

30. Have you ever considered plastic surgery? If so, what would you change about your body?

often but im too much of a scared cat dsfskjf idk though, I would love to be much more petite size wise

31. Have you ever cried over a guy/girl?

oh often

32. Have you ever experienced unrequited love?

yeah;; I’m not exactly pretty or popular, so puberty was hard

33. Have you ever had sex with a man?

hell yeah

34. Have you ever had sex with a woman?

:( no

35. Have you ever kissed someone older than you?

yeh!!

36. Have you ever liked one of your best friends?

Yeah and it’s difficult to be normal then aaaaaahhhhhhh

37. Have you ever liked someone who your friends hated?

some of my friends have a strong disliking towards my current bf but i dont know if you can call it hate

38. Have you ever liked someone you didn’t expect to?

yeah and it ruined me for a while

39. Have you ever wanted someone you couldn’t have?

uuuuhh not really I think

40. Have you ever written a song or poem for someone?

whenever I write bday cards I always put a poem in it :D

41. Have you had sex so far this year?

hella

42. How long can you just kiss until your hands start to wander?

depends on how thirsty I am

43. How long was your longest relationship?

5 and a half years and counting

44. How many boyfriends/girlfriends have you had?

2-3

45. How many people did you kiss in 2011?

uuhh I was 14, no one

46. How many times did you have sex last year?

HELLA

47. How old are you?

22 my dudes

48. If the person you like says they like someone else, what would you say?

I#d try to play it cool because internally I’m panicking, someone help me

49. If you have a boyfriend/girlfriend, what is your favorite thing about him/her?

I love about my bf how you can ALWAYS count on him when shit gets down, even if he hasnt talked to a friend for a good while and they’re like “hey I need you”, he’ll be there in a sec Also that he is still able to surprise me

50. If your first true love knocked on your door with apology and presents, would you accept?

jsdfhsjdfks GO AWAY, I’d say while closing the door and shutting the blinds quicker than lightning

51. Is there a boy/girl who you would do absolutely everything for?

yeah, but that’s probably because I have bpd and depressions

52. Is there anyone you’ve given up on? Why?

yeah, I tried to help them on all occassions, so much that I ruined my own life partially and made myself sick. But whatever I did or said, they apparently want to suffer, so i gave up trying.

53. Is there someone mad because you’re dating/talking to the person you are?

yeah my abuser probably

54. Is there someone you will never forget?

unfortunately yes and fortunately yes

55. Share a relationship story.

uuuuuuhhhhh; I dont really know what to write here. Guess I’ll never forget when my bf held a kitten (which was only a week old) in his hands and he almost cried because he loved the baby so much. Haha, he was afraid of crushing it though because it was much smaller than the palms of his hands

56. State 8 facts about your body

I gained a lot of weight since last year which is why I avoid posting or taking pics, but according to everyone else you dont see it that much (?); my hair is getting its natural curliness back; I fucked up my knee so I’ll have knee surgery next year; I bruise easily; I have a shit ton of scars; I love my super green eyes; I have thicc thighs and if I’m very emotional I get red spots all over my body

57. Things you want to say to an ex

to my first ever bf: fuck u lmao to the second bf I had: I’m so sorry for everything and I hope that you found your place :)

58. What are five ways to win your heart?

uuuhhh be sweet and understanding, be funny, be somewhat smart, dont be a mean asshole and be nice to other people (especially kids) and animals and also be able to be fascinated by small things

59. What do you look like? (Post a picture!)

yikes

60. What is the biggest age difference between you and any of your partners?

my current bf is 8 years older than me

61. What is the first thing you notice in someone?

how open and nice they are? Idk I always choose my ppl to hang out with according to this

62. What is the sexiest thing someone could ever do for/to you?

even though I’m a switch I have a big preference for being the sub, so if someone can dominate me and yknow do stull like carry me princess style or something im all like !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

63. What is your definition of “having sex”?

everything that comes after kissing imo

64. What is your definition of cheating?

I think as soon as you try to pursue someone emotionally that already counts as cheating

65. What is your favourite foreplay routine?

kissing, grinding, I love when someone talks dirty to me

66. What is your favourite roleplay?

if it aint too much of a tmi i’d love to admit that we have a collar and a leash so (not thinking about pet play uughfjhjsdfkhsd, just yknow someone is able to drag me to them like this or being held in place while being taken from behind is p nice)

67. What is your idea of the perfect date?

something something being outside in the nature and also good food

68. What is your sexual orientation?

69. What turns you off?

super super wet kisses where also my nose somehow gets stuck in someone elses mouth Like dude r u a vacuum cleaner sdfhsdkjhfks

70. What turns you on?

being manhandled

71. What was your kinkiest wet dream?

idk I dont really have a lot of wet dreams and usually theyre not very kinky but rather sweet and slow

72. What words do you like to hear during sex?

I like dirty talk, so imma leave that open

73. What’s something sweet you’d like someone to do for you?

i love to get flowers, or lil stuff that reminds us of our friendship or something, self made/home made stuff is always !!!!!!!!!!!!

74. What’s the most superficial characteristic you look for?

probably hands? I love it when girls have super slender hands and when boys have rough and big hands

75. What’s the sweetest thing anyone’s ever done for you?

I already answered that c:

76. What’s the sweetest thing you’ve ever done for someone?

I have a few stories I’m proud of! But I really love this one: When I was little I grew up in a village in which like 300-400 people lived (maximum) and next to us lived this sweet older couple who always gave us sweets and vegetable for our parents, or they brought us stuff from when they went on vacation. The man is now constantly sick, he suffers from parkinson and you see the early statges of dementia setting in. A while ago he wanted to go and get the German version of fish and chips with his wife but due to him needing a ton of surgeriesw constantly he wasnt able to go out with his wife. When my mom told me this I was like wtf u cant just tell me this, I’m too soft. So I went and got fish and chips from the best market around us for him and flowers for his wife, despite the fact that I havent seen them in YEARS. When I arrived at their front door both of them hugged me and cried a bit

77. What’s your opinion on age differences in relationships?

not bad if everything is consensual and if there’s a power balance thats equal

78. What’s your dirtiest secret?

I think the leash thing is one of the kinkiest things we’ve ever done tbh

79. When was the last time you felt jealous? Why?

yesterday a bit when my bf went out wth friends and had a few beers while I was stuck at home with the thought that I can never have a beer again dkadfjahdf as stupid as that sounds but I always enjoyed these chill evenings with a beer and friends

80. When was the last time you told someone you loved them?

this morning when I cuddled my cats :D

81. Who are five people you find attractive?

my bf and many videogame and anime characters, also my best female friend is hella attractive, also some of my friends are to die for

82. Who is the last person you hugged?

my bf!!

83. Who was your first kiss with?

my first bf sdfjsdfs

84. Why did your last relationship fail?

it didnt really work out, it seemed as he was more interested in saying “hey im in a relationship!” than in me, hah;;

85. Would you ever date someone off of the Internet?

yeah, sure

#ask #jeezus

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eyndr · 7 years

Text

I have too much free time

So i've made some lists of things i've noticed that I think are cool/interesting concerning Lazytown. Some stuff is probably common knowledge but I feel like pointing it out anyways. I've also got a little list of head canons. If you'd like to see my observations and head canons, read on! (I'm currently using mobile and idk how to insert the 'Keep Reading' line. I'll edit this later. Apologies) Things I've noticed in the show: -Sportacus likes to have one ice cube in his water so that he can chew it. He's a cube chewer -Robbie is spooked by ghosts. And bees. And dogs. The man is super duper jumpy all around -Trixie is a freakin danger junky omg -Robbie almost always accidentally closes the hatch to his lair on his fingers. Poor boi just not paying attention lol -Hats are like 90% of the disguise. Your hat falls off and it's all over. Likewise, you could probably get away with just a really well made hat and nothing else. -it gets really really freakin cold in Robbie's lair in the winter. :( -Sportacus only needs a scarf in dead winter????? -Stephanie really likes those useless fluff balls you find on the end of winter hats and sometimes on boots -the mayor loves hot cocoa. -Robbie actually does like the kids. He often wonders what the kids are up to and checks up on them through his scope thing. -Stephanie is afraid of heights! :o -Trixie Pixel and Stingy are the three musketeers. They act a bit more mature and joke around like besties when its just the three of them -Robbie is always calling Stingy 'Stinky'? Does he reek of greed or something? -the mayor is the mayor and the principle? Who the hell hires him, how is he at all qualified for any of this -HES THE TEACHER TOO!!?! -Robbie never gets calls, except for when Bessie calls him by accident :( -Robbie points off into the distance dramatically when he pulls the disguise lever -Robbie likes to sleep with his arms crossed -Sportacus's crystal does actually sense when people are depressed; in season 2 episode 16 Robbie takes apart their race cars and they're all sad and Sportacus's crystal goes off. Now ik thats not depression, but if it goes off when they're sad, surely it'll go off when someone is actually depressed. -Robbie knows everyone's birthdays!! He wrote them all down in his calendar :D -Ziggy's Bday is the 14th? Of what? -Sportacus's is the 10th (eh heh) -Bessie: 6th -Mayor: 3rd (I think) -Stephanie: 1rst -Pixel is left handed (or possibly ambidextrous?) -The mayor likes to knit -Trixie can play the guitar -Sportacus is very knowledgable about trolls? -Robbie is an extremely light sleeper -Stingy will get camera shy AF Things that are true in my head: -Robbie loves to wear bowties. Sportacus thinks he's really freakin cute when he wears bowties :3 -Once Sportacus finds out that Robbie has a phone but no one ever calls him, he'll call him up from his airship and asks if he's doing alright and they have nice little conversations :) -Miss Busybody makes the absolute best hot cocoa. It's the highlight of the Mayor's day whenever she makes some. -Trixie actually loves to read but won't admit it, books are dUMB -Pixel is into astronomy -So I'm pretty sure Robbie did something for someone once. Not sure what it was exactly, but now he not only gets free stuff, he gets immediate (and free) shipping. He probably murdered someone for somebody, idk -Trixie will crinkle her notes and tear them. She won't notice shes doing this -Stingy hums the 'Mine' song. All. The. Time. -Stephanie's favorite number is 8 -Ziggy's is 4 -I feel like Robbie might have ADHD, he's always jumpy and twitchy (this might also be due to the fact that he's constantly eating cake tho) and he can't seem to remember things, especially names. He seems like the impulsive type as well, always eating and doing whatever he wants. -blue kangaroo XD -i can't believe his top teeth were fake guys i never noticed -it's pleasantly surprising how much thought actually went into these characters and their appearances

#thanks for reading yo #lazytown #headcanons #lazytown headcanons #im using mobile idk how to insert the 'keep reading' line #i'll edit it later i apologize

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