#IM A WOMAN OF TALENT AND TASTE
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couples who kill together stay together. there you go, the secret to dark and coziness all in one
#᛭ — [OOC] angst is the game and tears are the currency#ITS THE ATMOSPHERE OKAY#NOTHING LIKE THUNDER AND LIGHTNING TO BRING OUT YEARNING FOR DARKNESS#......but also when its quiet and just rain let the muses nap idk#IM A WOMAN OF TALENT AND TASTE#(thats a joke no im not)
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but even after this, you’re still everything to me.
a/n: im not hugely keen on this but thought i’d post it anyway! i hate this luna fic drought we’re all in so much so here’s my contribution hehe! i’ve also only roughly read it through so please ignore any mistakes.
word count: 7.4k
but even after this, you’re still everything to me.
Everything was a constant reminder of her; the matching toothbrush that shared a home beside her own, the golden smiley face necklace that she had given her as a present because it reminded her of her smile, the excessive amount of half empty condiments still in the fridge, the little westie she saw every day after training and whom still got excited to see her.
Lucy was gone, but the memory of her was far from that.
It had been a grand total of six months since the defender had transferred to her new club. Six months since Ona had felt truly happy. She felt silly really, their relationship had started off as long distance and it was overly common to have to deal with it at some point being a sportsperson.
However, after living the dream life with Lucy for an entire season and becoming so accustomed to having her by her side day and night it utterly broke her when she left. It broke them.
She didn’t blame Lucy, she couldn’t. The defender had wanted to extend her contract with Barça but unfortunately wasn’t offered a renewal. The pair had cried many tears together when they learnt the news, less than ready to face being apart yet again. They spent evenings upon evenings going through offers that Lucy had received and weighing out the pros and cons.
In the end, Lucy settled on Bayern. She had offers worldwide, everyone unsurprisingly jumping at the chance to sign the talented right-back. However, Germany was the closest she could be to Ona and although swearing she would always put her career first, Ona was now her priority.
The day the older woman had left, the last time she closed the door to what had been their shared apartment, she had taken off with a promise. She promised Ona that they would be okay, that she would visit whenever she could and that she would never give up on them.
She kept that promise. Messaging and facetiming Ona at every opportunity, finding as many gaps in her schedule as she could just to fly over to see her, but Ona wasn’t strong enough. The younger woman couldn’t cope with the distance, she’d had a taste of a life with Lucy and having it ripped from underneath her sent her into self sabotage.
Lucy wasn’t stupid, she knew Ona like the back of her hand and so the change in her demeanour was picked up by her instantly.
“Is everything okay?”
Ona looked at her through the screen, the beautiful eyes she loved more than anything filled with nothing but concern. She went to nod, pretend that everything was fine, but it wasn’t and Lucy knew it too.
“I can’t do this anymore.”
The break up was filled with tears. None of the breakups the spaniard had been through had been pleasant, but this was so different. They were both still so deeply in love with the other, they wanted it to work but had both come to the conclusion that they were putting one another through more harm than good.
Lucy was the woman that Ona wanted to spend the rest of her life with. She knew that from day one, but for some reason the clouded thoughts in her brain persuaded her that it would be easier to give it all up rather than fight for it. It was completely out of character for Ona to just give up this easily, but she had never experienced a love like this and love makes you do crazy things.
She spent the rest of the night crying in bed, using Coco as a source of comfort. She didn’t think she could possibly feel anymore shitty until her phone pinged with a message, her heart physically breaking at its contents.
I promise this is the last time i will contact you, but i just had to say this before i let you go.The two years i got to call you mine were easily the best years of my life. I’ll never find another like you Ona Batlle and i hope more than anything that one day we find our way back to eachother. Thank you for everything. I love you, always.
Your Lucia.
They hadn’t spoken since.
Everyone told her it would get better after that, or somewhat easier. It never did. It had been months since the breakup and although she was able to force a smile onto her face at training, the facade instantly slipped as soon as she got a minute alone.
The team were at dinner together after being away for international break. Ona being forcefully dragged out by Mariona against her will after insisting she wanted to stay home. She loved being around her teammates, but the thought of socialising with anyone now aside from her dog felt utterly challenging.
She was sat beside Keira throughout the meal, not missing the concerned glances the ginger would give her every now and again. The spaniard envied Keira in a way, her being the only one on the team who got to see Lucy somewhat regularly. Tossing around a piece of chicken on her fork, she couldn’t help but allow temptation to get the better of her and ask the question on the front of her mind.
“How is she?”
Keira turned to face Ona, her eyes immediately softening as she took in her broken expression.
“She asked me the same question.”
The ginger smiled sadly, not forgetting the same sad look that was on Lucy’s face when she too asked how Ona was doing.
“Her and Georgia are thick as thieves now they play on the same team, but you should really message her yourself. I know it would make her smile from ear to ear because she’s missing you an awful lot.”
Ona hated the way her heart picked up upon hearing that last part. She thought she should be moving on, but it was impossible.
The midfielder didn’t miss the hopeful glint in her eye upon hearing how much Lucy missed her. Some may say it was odd how much care Keira had for her ex girlfriend and her ex girlfriends ex, but she couldn’t deny they were perfect for one another. Herself and Lucy had ended on the best terms possible and she and Ona had made her feel more than comfortable when they all played on the same team, actually forming a genuine friendship that they all valued.
“Long distance is hard, but it really is worth it if you love them enough. I wish more than anything that i got to see Laura everyday but everytime i do get to see her i’m reminded of why i do it.”
The spaniard let out a sigh, grateful for Keira’s kindness but also filled with the thoughts that she wasn’t strong enough to cope with it. She didn’t want to be the reason that her and Lucy both always felt an emptiness when they were apart.
“Thank you, Keira. She would be worth it, of course she would, but i’m just not as strong as you are.”
Keira wanted to argue it, convince Ona that she was indeed strong enough and that the heart ache would never actually go away if she just gave up. However, she also knew that Ona didn’t need to hear that right now, opting to just squeeze her shoulder and offer her a sad smile.
So, for the remainder of the football season Ona did her best to push her sadness to the back of her mind. There was no way she was going to be getting back into the dating scene, that wouldn’t be fair on her or a potential partner. Instead, she focused on finding things that made her happy again and partook in less moping around. She busied herself with old and new hobbies that she found she enjoyed and worked on her ever awful baking skills all the way up until the final match.
Her teammates noticed the change in her, and although the tinge of sadness never quite left, they were overjoyed to get a slice of their happy friend back. The euros were also fast approaching, and having played her last game of the 24/25 season Ona was feeling as ready as ever to play for her country.
The tournament was being held in Switzerland, and having visited a few times already Ona was excited to return to the beautiful country. Amongst the excitement of it all, the spaniard hadn’t even thought twice about the fact that Spain obviously weren’t going to be the only country in attendance. It wasn’t until she was sat on the plane next to one of her best friends, Salma, that the realisation hit her like a ton of bricks.
“You think you’re going to be okay, Oni?”
Ona had given her a questioning look, taking out an airpod to try and gauge what she was referring to.
“Seeing Lucy again and everything.”
That’s when it hit her.
She’d tried to force herself to stop thinking about Lucy as much. She attempted the classic out of sight, out of mind approach and although it hadn’t worked and she still thought about her every single damn minute, she hadn’t actually taken into consideration the fact they were going to be more than likely less than five minutes down the road from one another for the next few weeks.
They hadn’t ended on bad terms at all, the last message Ona received from the english woman being nothing but adorable. However, that didn’t prevent the nervous feeling growing in her tummy at the idea of seeing the woman she loved so dearly after so many months.
“I hadn’t actually thought about it.”
Salma noticed the way her friend was nervously picking at her nails now, placing her hand atop to offer some comfort.
“It will be fine, you don’t need to worry. It’s not like it’s going to be awkward between you or anything.”
For the remaining duration of the flight, Ona couldn’t help but allow her mind to spiral about what seeing Lucy again would be like. She was excited in a way, she missed the older woman more than she ever knew it was possible to miss a human, but she also was filled with nerves.
Herself and Lucy had always struggled to stay away from one another. They were like magnets from the day they met, drawn to one another instantly when in close enough proximity. It was one of the things that made Ona realise just how deep her love for her was, never before being a very physical person.
The spaniard allowed her mind to wander all the way up until she reached her hotel room. The girls all got their own rooms now, which she appreciated for the privacy but also missed the company.
Ona collapsed straight onto the white sheets and as soon as she unlocked her phone, almost immediately found herself mindlessly scrolling through Lucy’s instagram, something she definitely didn’t do on the regular, and smiling to herself at the pictures. Lucy was the most beautiful woman on the planet in her eyes and she couldn’t help but want to appreciate that.
As she scrolled down a little further, she came across her favourite collections of photos. During their relationship they both had agreed to keep it private, but not a secret. So, something they both had enjoyed doing frequently was complying pictures for a photo dump that gave the teeniest subtle hints of the other.
They resembled school girls whenever they’d hit the post button, giggling away to each other about the hidden meanings behind each photo they had chosen.
As she refreshed the page, scrolling back up to the top, she came across a new photo she hadn’t seen before. It had been posted only twenty seconds ago and showed Lucy, grinning widely at the camera as she stepped off a plane. Ona missed that smile more than anything, not being able to stop herself from zooming in to get a closer look at her favourite eyes. She missed looking into them without the preventative barrier of a screen more than anything. However, what she definitely didn’t intend to do at all was like the photo.
As soon as the red heart splayed across the screen, she froze.
“Mierda!”
She muttered to herself, shutting off her phone instantly. It really wasn’t that big of a deal. All she’d done was press the like button, but knowing it was after only twenty seconds of being posted made her internally cringe.
She wasn’t a huge instagram user at the best of times, only really going on there to promote games or post a few photos herself. She rarely ever liked posts and Lucy knew that. It had become a weird sort of game for them both, Lucy knowing that if she ever received a like from Ona it meant that the spaniard had really, really enjoyed the photo.
After a few minutes of cursing herself, face buried into her hands, she felt her phone buzzing multiple times from underneath the pillow she had shoved on top of it.
Lucy Bronze liked your post.
Lucy Bronze liked your post.
Lucy Bronze liked your post.
She knows she shouldn’t but Ona couldn’t help the smug smile that wiped across her face. She’d been in the same country as Lucy for approximately an hour and already she couldn’t keep away.
She stared at the collection of notifications, knowing Lucy knew exactly what she was doing and contemplated messaging her. She was weighing up the pros and cons in her head before she finally came to the conclusion of…fuck it.
Stalker.
She kept it short and a reply came almost instantly.
If i remember correctly it was you who liked my post first, within a minute of it being posted may i also add.
You looked nice.
She was feeling brave, eagerly anticipating Lucy's response and not being disappointed when it came through.
So did you.
The spaniard hovered her fingers over the keys, preparing what she wanted to say next when her phone began to ring with a facetime request. She knew who it was before even reading the ‘Lucia’ followed by a pink heart, that flashed up. Ona knew it was a bad idea to answer the call, but it was a bad idea to send her a message in the first place, so to hell with it.
As the screen filled with Lucy, she opened her mouth to speak but was immediately silenced by the sight. The defender had her hair down and splaying across her shoulders, her glasses resting perfectly on the bridge of her nose, a content smile on her lips. She must’ve noticed Ona’s trance as what was a smile turned into a smirk and she took the words right out of her mouth.
“I’ve missed seeing your face.”
Ona blushed at that, mirroring the smirk that Lucy was giving her.
“You are in Switzerland now, too?”
Lucy nodded, “We arrived a couple hours ago. How have you been?”
The pair spoke for hours, but it felt like minutes. Everything always felt so easy with Lucy, and Ona had missed the lighthearted conversations they would share. It was nice to talk to someone and not feel like she was pretending for once. Lucy could tell just by the younger girls' mannerisms that she wasn’t totally herself and she too wasn’t totally herself either. Neither woman had been since the day they had broken up.
Lucy had craved seeing Onas smile for months, but the fact it didn’t quite reach her eyes anymore didn’t go unnoticed by her. She kept pressing her on whether she was really doing okay, and upon being met with an unconvincing nod for the third time she asked her to see her tomorrow.
Ona was sceptical at first, knowing that she would likely break down at some point if she was to see Lucy. However, the opportunity was unlikely to become available again anytime soon so she had to grab it with both hands. She chose to ignore how impossibly further back that would set her on her attempts at moving on, and she honestly couldn’t bring herself to care.
“You’re really up for meeting tomorrow, yeah?”
Lucy questioned, a little taken aback that Ona had actually agreed.
“Si, i would really like to.”
After saying goodnight to Lucy, Ona couldn’t quite comprehend the fact that she would be seeing her tomorrow. She tossed and turned in the hotel bed, thinking about how long it had been and what she was actually going to say to her.
When realisation had hit her on the plane earlier that day that they’d be in the same place, she didn’t think for even a second that tomorrow she’d be willingly meeting up with her. Just the two of them.
The thought of being next to her and not being able to call her love, rest her head in the crook of her neck, trace the outline of her wrist tattoo the way she loved, kiss her senseless seemed impossible. She and Lucy had been drawn to each other from day one, never ever being just friends and always being one hundred times more than that. However, she would have been a fool to turn down her offer after craving just her presence for so many months.
It’s safe to say she went to sleep with Lucy, and Lucy only on her mind that night.
Ona was convinced she had never gotten up and ready faster in her life the next morning. Herself and Lucy had agreed to grab coffee and just go for a stroll around a local park, close to both of their hotels. It was crazy to think that they actually used to do this most days together, and it was now that Ona realised how much she took the most simple of things for granted.
She didn’t plan on telling anyone that she was going to meet Lucy, not wanting to answer any unwanted questions. However, the ridiculously wide smile for only eight in the morning didn’t go unmissed by Mariona.
“What’s got you so smiley chica?”
Ona turned to give her a small shrug.
“Just excited for tomorrow’s game.”
Mariona narrowed her eyes, not believing a single word.
“I know that smile. That’s your Lucy smile, have you seen her?”
The brunettes eyes widened. She loved how close she was with her teammates, but the fact they could analyse her moods this in depth and with such little information made her wish they didn’t know her quite so well.
“How did you kn-“
Mariona cut her off.
“You’ve been a lot happier these past few weeks Oni, but we can all tell it’s a little false. You haven’t looked as happy as you do this morning since Lucy left Barça. Now you’re in the same country and suddenly you’re like the gato de Cheshire!”
Ona sighed in defeat, there was no way she could argue with that.
“Okay fine, you got me. But i haven’t seen her yet. I’m meeting her after breakfast and it’s just as friends, sadly.”
The forwards grin widened even more, impressed with her ability to guess correctly and also happy that two of her best friends would be reuniting again.
“Do you think it’s a bad idea though? I want to see her so badly but i’m…scared.”
Mariona met her with a sympathetic smile, grasping her hand that was nervously picking at her t-shirt.
“There’s no need to be nervous, guapa. I know, we all know, how much you have been missing her and this is the greatest opportunity. Besides, you and Lucy will get back together one day. I know everything, remember.”
Ona let out a huff of a laugh, shaking her head as she got up to scrape the remnants of her breakfast into the bin.
“Gracias, Mario.”
“Don’t have too much fun, Oni. Oh and when you’re done with her tell her i’d like to see her too!”
Mariona called out after her as the spaniard made her way outside with a fond chuckle and a ‘si lo que sea.’
As Ona made her way outside, she stood by the fir tree tucked around the corner from the Spanish girls hotel. She and Lucy had agreed to meet there and so she busied herself with scrolling through her emails she had neglected whilst she waited. She had so many feelings. She was nervous and excited all at the same time, but thankfully the anticipation was cut short as a deep, familiar voice called out to her.
“Ona?”
Her head snapped up at the English accent, emails immediately forgotten.
As soon as she looked into those beautiful eyes properly for the first time again in too many months she felt as though she could turn into a human puddle.
“Hola, Lucia.”
Lucy smiled at the nickname, all the feelings she had been desperately trying to keep bottled up spilling out. She let out a deep sigh as she took in the woman in front of her.
“Wow, i- i can’t believe you’re here.”
Ona mirrored her smile, nodding her head in the direction of the park to begin their walk together.
They chatted non-stop about anything and everything, never once enduring any type of awkward silence and everything felt just like it had many months ago. Lucy brought them
both a coffee, ordering exactly what she knew Ona liked and ignoring the spaniards insistence on paying.
As they carried on, coffees in hand the pair reached a bench in a secluded area, opting to sit down for a while.
“So, how is it at Bayern?”
“It’s okay. The girls are lovely, it’s nice to have Georgia there as a familiar face, but i miss being in Barcelona a lot.”
“I bet you just miss the sun.”
Lucy let out a chuckle at that, knowing how much Ona used to tease her that she was more English than her as Lucy was always such a baby whenever the temperature dropped below twenty five degrees.
“Well that’s a big part of it, yeah. All it does is bloody rain in Germany, but I also miss the food, the views, Narla, the girls…you.”
Ona’s breath hitched a little. It felt as though she and Lucy had silently agreed not to divulge into their feelings, but knowing she missed her made her heart beat that little bit extra.
She looked her dead in the eye, her own eyes softening at the small expression on her face. The spaniard couldn’t help but reach her petite hand out and place it on Lucy's knee and as if by reflex, Lucy’s hand came to rest on top of Ona’s.
“I miss you too, Lucia.”
Ona swallowed deeply, looking down at their hands as Lucy began to rub small circles across her knuckles. It took every strength within her body to restrain herself from leaning forward and attaching their lips, so instead of doing that she tried to divert the conversation in a different direction.
“So, you don’t have a new girlfriend then?”
The Englishwoman let out a rumbly laugh at the question, deeming it as absolutely ridiculous.
“Don’t be stupid, course i don’t.”
“Well good, i was just checking.”
“Good? Why, what would you have done if i’d said yes?”
Lucy was smirking at her, the smirk that almost always had Ona on her knees.
“Tell her to, how you say? Back the fuck off.”
She knew she should tone down on the flirting, only setting herself up for more pain in the near future. But when Lucy was looking at her like that with that smirk on her face she simply couldn’t help herself.
“That’s hot” Lucy murmured.
Ona couldn’t wipe the grin off of her face, not missing the way Lucy was now trailing her fingertips up her arm. Until, all of a sudden reality came crashing down on her.
It was almost like for a split second she’d forgotten about the fact they weren’t actually together anymore, they’d fallen back into their usual ways the second they’d reunited and it was only now that Ona had to remind herself the woman beside her wasn’t hers anymore.
“Hey, you okay?”
Lucy asked, evidently concerned as the spaniards smile had faltered and her eyes had filled with sudden sadness.
Ona nodded, trying but failing to keep the thick hot tear that now trickled down her cheek at bay.
“Woah, woah what’s the matter?”
The defenders eyes widened, her hand immediately coming up to rest on the small of her back. The sudden change in Onas mood scared her beyond belief, there was nothing she hated more than seeing her in any sort of discomfort.
“It, it’s just-“
She began, stuttering her way through the answer.
“For a second it was like I completely forgot.”
“Forgot about what?”
Lucy questioned, her voice soft and hand never stopping it’s comforting movements across the small back.
“That we aren’t us anymore. I’ve only been with you for no more than an hour and it already feels like the old times again.”
Ona let out a long, shaky breath, desperately rubbing at her now reddened eyes to stop the tears. As she blinked her way through them, her vision becoming a tiny bit clearer, she focused on Lucy, and the way she was looking at her as if she was the only thing that mattered sent another fresh pang across her heart.
“Oh, sweetheart.”
The lioness pulled her into her chest, Ona not even trying to fight it and allowing her head to rest there. She sniffled into Lucy’s training shirt, relishing in the familiar smell of her perfume as she allowed herself to calm down in the embrace.
“It’s so hard, so fucking hard. You have no idea how much I miss you every single day.”
Lucy whispered as she stroked her hair, scratching at her scalp lightly in the way she knew always brought her comfort.
The two women made no attempt to move for a good few minutes, Ona’s sobs finally subsiding as she chose to fully focus on the way Lucy's fingers felt brushing through her hair. She lifted her head from the comfy spot on her chest, sitting back against the bench as Lucy’s eyes followed her with concern.
“Lo siento. I shouldn’t have said anything.”
“No, it’s good to talk about your feelings. You can’t bottle them up all the time, it’s not good for you.”
Ona looked at the ground, not being able to meet Lucy’s eyes again. Her willpower was declining and she knew that as soon she looked at her face again, she would be pressing her lips against said face.
“I need to go.”
“Already?”
Ona nodded, standing up from her spot and any glimmer of hope that Lucy had felt was immediately gone.
“Please don’t just walk away from this, we’re both hurting Ona and it’s not just going to go away.”
The broken tone in Lucy’s voice made her feel all different types of guilt. Deep down she knew she was being stupid. She could get back with Lucy and feel ten times happier, but there was something inside her convincing her she would just be putting them both through pain.
“I’m sorry but I think this was a mistake.”
She walked away without another look back, tears spilling down her cheeks as the sad look on the Englishwoman's face was etched into her mind. Nothing was ever a mistake with Lucy, the only thing being her own actions.
As soon as she entered her hotel, heading straight for the lift she was spotted by Mariona.
“Ay, Ona! Esperar!”
Her teammate called out, chasing after her with a grin on her face that quickly turned into confusion upon seeing her tear stained face.
“I messed it all up, it was going so well and then I just freaked.”
Ona was a blubbering mess as Mariona followed her into the lift. She pulled her into her embrace, rocking her side to side and tried to provide her with the reassurance she needed.
“Come on Oni, tell me what happened.”
Hours had passed and Ona was still trying to explain the internal battle that was going on in her head. Mariona was being so kind, carefully listening to the explanation and offering the best advice she could muster up.
“Do you really not think making it work long distance is an option? You both love each other chica, and that’s how you started this.”
“I know and I feel so stupid. So many people have to do it, you do it. I think i’m just craving the old life we had.”
Mariona nodded in understanding.
“I understand, but it is important to remember that it’s not forever. I miss Lia all the time, but I know that one day we will have the life together we always talk about.”
Ona smiled a little at that, suddenly feeling terrible for rambling on and not asking about her friend's life more often.
“How is Lia?”
“Buena. I’m glad i finally get to spend some time with her here, it makes it all worth it.”
Ona couldn’t help but remember back to her conversation with Keira a few months ago, the ginger saying the exact same thing. The two friends continued their conversation way into the night, both reminiscing on the time both Lia and Lucy had come to watch them play in the nations league final. The spaniard was so grateful to have friends as understanding as her team mates.
Spains first game was the next day and they absolutely flew through it, just like they did the whole tournament really. The euros went by so fast and before she knew it, Ona was preparing for the final game. The final game that was against none other than England. It was like des ja vu for the whole team, except this time around Ona wasn’t giddily messaging her girlfriend the morning before.
After her conversation with Mariona, she had decided not to message Lucy again during the tournament. She had wanted to, felt the need to apologise for the way she took off with barely an explanation. However, she also didn’t want to mess with her head during such a big competition, and figured it would be easier for both of them to have their full focus on getting a win for their country. She had decided she wanted to make a go of it though, nothing could be worse than the feeling she already felt every day. She just hoped and prayed that she wasn’t too late.
As soon as the Spanish team arrived at the stadium they were ushered out onto the pitch to perform their pitch inspection. The England team were already out there and before Ona could even search for Lucy she was being dragged into a hug by Ella.
“Ona! I’ve missed ya.”
The strong northern accent boomed, still never being able to pronounce her name correctly.
“Ah, Tooney. It has been too long.”
Ona replied as she felt herself being slowly lifted off of the ground by the girls strong hug. They caught up for a few minutes, Ona spending most of it in hysterics over whatever Ella was talking about. Until the inevitable question came up.
“You gonna go speak to Bronzey?”
Ona sighed, looking across the grass where she finally found the woman in question. She was chatting to Alexia and Laia, donning a wide smile that Ona wished she was the cause of.
“Si, i will actually. It was nice seeing you though and good luck tonight.”
Ella ruffled her hair before making her way over to Lucia, deciding it was time to pester her now and once she disappeared Ona looked back over at Lucy to find her now alone, scrolling on her phone.
She took a deep breath and made her way over, stopping right in front of her.
“Hola.”
Lucy looked up from her phone, swallowing deeply as she met her eye.
“Oh, hey.”
It was colder than Ona was used to, colder than it had been when she’d seen her only a few weeks ago.
“How are you?”
Lucy nodded, “Im fine. You?”
The spaniard couldn’t hide the hurt on her face now and just simply nodded. She had never been spoken to by Lucy this bluntly before and she instantly felt tears prick at the corners of her eyes.
“I missed you.”
She desperately tried, hoping Lucy would give her something back. She could see the slight break in her demeanour after that, her eyes somewhat softening if only a tiny bit.
“Good luck tonight.”
Was Lucy’s response and as she tried to make her way past her, Ona grabbed her hand. Lucy looked down at the grip Ona now had on her wrist, almost breaking at the way her thumb cascaded across it gently.
“Please, don’t be like this.”
“Like what, Ona? You’ve made it perfectly clear we can’t be together so I don't know how you want me to act?”
There were tears filling in the spaniards eyes now, unable to look anywhere but Lucy but feeling her heart break even more at the hushed way she was shouting at her.
“Im sorry that i ran off the other week. I was scared, Lucy and i didn’t want to hurt either of us anymore than i already have. I just want-“
She was cut off by the whistle, summoning both teams back inside.
“Please, just let me explain after the game.”
Lucy looked down at the way Ona still had a hold of her wrist and then back up to meet her eyes, nodding slowly before she had to walk away and rejoin her England team mates.
Ona let out a deep breath she hadn’t even realised she’d been holding as she walked her way back into the changing rooms. She didn’t really know what she expected, but it definitely wasn’t that. The younger girl couldn’t blame Lucy for being distant with her, but that didn’t make it hurt any less when the one thing she wanted more than anything in the world was Lucy.
When the teams lined up side by side in the tunnel, Ona couldn’t help but turn around to look at Lucy. Though when she turned and found her eyes already on her, she wished she hadn’t as how was she supposed to concentrate on the game now?
It was even worse when she made her way down the line to give hand shakes and high fives to the England team. When she got to Lucy, last as always, she couldn’t help but hold onto her hand for a second longer than what was probably deemed acceptable.
Lucy gave her hand a small squeeze, and there was evidence of a tiny smile growing at the corners of her mouth as she mouthed ‘im sorry.’ This was all the reassurance that Ona needed to go out and play this match.
Little did Ona know that Jordan had been silently observing their interaction during the pitch inspection. She had questioned Lucy on it as soon as they had taken their seats in the changing room.
“What was all that about?”
“What d’you mean?”
Lucy had responded nonchalantly.
“All that out there with you and Ona. Why are you giving her the cold shoulder?”
The defender shrugged, “I'm not.”
Jordan rolled her eyes, "I'm not as stupid as you think. You’ve been non-stop going on about her since the day you broke up, so why were you acting like that?”
“Because I love her Jord, okay? I love her and every time I think about her it bloody hurts.”
The Aston Villa players' face softened, remaining quiet so that Lucy could carry on.
“It hurt me so bad when I last saw her. I thought for a split second there might’ve been a chance but she made it perfectly clear there wasn’t when she upped and left. So, I thought that maybe this time if I was blunt with her, didn’t give her much conversation then I wouldn’t be opening myself up to feeling even more like shit when she inevitably walks away again.”
Jordan let out a sigh, wrapping her arm supportively around her shoulder.
“She seemed like she genuinely wanted to talk to you, Luce. I couldn’t hear what she was saying obviously but maybe she’s had some time to think and genuinely wants to give the long distance a go.”
“Yeah, maybe, I don’t know. I told her i’d speak to her after the game so I just need to focus on getting this win first.”
The game was a tough one to say the least. The world cup champions against the european champions was never going to be a walk in the park, but Ona found she thrived off the intensity. She was playing well, her whole team was playing well and were fuelled by the excitable crowd. However, a last minute goal by Lauren Hemp meant that England had done it for the second time.
The spaniard laid back on the grass, absolutely exhausted from the ninety six minutes she had just endured. She looked around at all of her team mates, noticing the defeat and sadness in their eyes as they hugged one another. As she looked in the other direction though, she caught sight of the England girls with a much different expression on their faces. They all looked so unbelievably happy, tears shed out of happiness rather than sadness which was a huge contrast to the world cup.
She immediately caught sight of Lucy, never failing to be impressed by her ability to always pick her out instantly no matter how many people she was mixed in with. She looked happy, so happy, as she lifted Alex into the air and Ona couldn’t help but smile at the sight.
She hauled herself up off of the pitch, deciding it was best if she went over to console her team mates who had taken the loss particularly hard. Ona was gutted of course, she was as competitive as they came and wanted to win everything she took part in. However, seeing the joy on Lucy’s face eased the disappointment a pretty large amount, which was a fact she would definitely not be sharing with her girls.
Once she’d done the rounds, giving pats on the back and assuring the team that they did their best she caught sight of a shirtless Lucy standing in front of her. It was safe to say her mouth fell visibly agape as her eyes couldn’t decide whether to fix on the woman’s eyes or her abs.
“Im sorry.”
It sounded like a double meaning apology. For the coldness Lucy presented her with earlier, and also for the fact that her team had just beaten Ona’s. She decided to focus on the last part though, if her mind could possibly focus on anything other than the abs staring her right in the face.
She shrugged, “it’s okay, you all deserved it.”
“So did all of you though, you’re a hard team to beat.”
Ona smiled a little, enjoying the sight of the well-deserved gold medal that hung proudly around Lucy’s neck.
“This is for you.”
Lucy said as she chucked her match worn shirt into Ona’s hands.
The spaniard couldn’t help the smug smile that wiped across her face. Ever since the world cup final, Ona had held a pretend grudge against Lucy at the fact she gave Mariona her shirt and not her. Mariona and Lucy thought it was hilarious and would tease her about it all the time, but Ona could not for the life of her understand how she wasn’t the one trading shirts with her own girlfriend.
“Oh, you don’t want me to get Mario? So you can trade with her instead?”
Lucy smirked at her, letting out a huff of a laugh, “well actually, now you come to mention it-“
“Don’t you even dare.”
Ona interrupted, lightly slapping her on the chest.
She took her own shirt off then, handing it to Lucy as she replaced the Spanish jersey on her body with an England one, adorned with ‘Bronze 2’ on the back.
The wide eyed look on Lucy's face and the way she scanned her body up and down certainly didn’t go unnoticed by Ona. Who took it upon herself to give a small twirl so she could see the name on the back.
“Suits me?”
Lucy had to bite down on her own lip to physically stop herself from drooling. She had just won back to back euros, yet she felt like she’d well and truly hit the jackpot seeing the pretty spaniard with her name on her back.
She nodded and lightly took a hold of Ona’s arm, discreetly pulling her away from the pitch and down the tunnel away from prying eyes and cameras. Ona didn’t know what was happening, so when she was dragged into an empty medical room she looked at with a confused expression.
“Im sorry for how I acted with you earlier.”
Lucy blurted it out fast, as if she was scared if she didn’t say it soon enough Ona would be ripped away from her again.
“It’s okay, I understand. I didn’t give you an explanation last time and I am sorry for that.”
Ona looked up at Lucy, delicately intertwining their hands that were dangling by their sides. When she felt Lucy grip on tighter she stepped forward, further into her embrace and reached her other hand up to tilt her chin down to look her in the eye.
“I want to make this work. I thought I was doing the right thing by letting you go, but it is completely impossible to move on from you.”
Lucy pulled her impossibly closer as Ona carried on.
“I get it if I'm too late and you don’t want this but-“
The older woman decided she couldn’t wait any longer. She pressed her lips against Ona’s before she could even finish her sentence, the younger girl sighing happily into her mouth.
Ona reached both her arms up to wrap them around Lucy’s neck, interlinking them at the back to pull their bodies even closer. She let out a deep moan as the older woman pushed her further back against the wall, her strong hand sneaking up the England jersey Ona wore to scratch dully at her abs.
Ona parted her lips only slightly at the sensation, giving Lucy enough access to slide her tongue into her mouth. The room was filled with heavy breaths and pants, both women’s hands not being able to stop exploring the other's body as they had been deprived for so long.
Lucy finally managed to pull away from Ona’s mouth, but only to attach her lips to the inviting skin on her neck. She trailed hot, open mouthed kisses all the way up to her favourite spot behind her ear.
“I want this.”
She whispered, taking a tiny nip.
“I want you.”
Another kiss.
As the Englishwoman made her way back down to Ona’s jaw they were startled by the door swinging open, forcing them both apart and none other than Mariona walking in.
“Mierda! ¡Lo siento, chicas!”
She hurriedly said, hands covering her eyes.
“You can open your eyes, Mario.”
Lucy said with a chuckle as the Spanish woman slowly blinked one eye open to check it was safe before removing both of her hands entirely.
“You see Oni, I told you I knew everything! Oh and congratulations Lucy, I'll come and see you once you’re done…here!”
Mariona said before winking at Ona and exiting the room.
Ona let out a huff of a laugh, wrapping her arms tightly around Lucy’s waist as she lay her head on her chest.
“What was she on about?”
Lucy questioned, stroking her hands through Ona’s hair as she felt her grin against her chest.
“Oh, nada.”
She pulled her head out of Lucy’s chest, looking up at her with a look that could only be described as utter adoration.
“We are going to alright, aren’t we Lucia?”
“As long as we’ve got each other we’ll be fine, princesa.”
#lucy bronze#ona batlle#lucy bronze x ona batlle#woso fanfics#mariona caldentey#jordan nobbs#angst with a happy ending#fluff
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i'd love just about anyone, so why was it you?
a victoria neuman x reader
your talent for singing is finally starting to take you places in the city of lights. so why did it have to introduce you to a woman who might ruin it all?
wc : 10.248
contains : fxf relationship. readers hair and skin aren't described. fluff. angst.nsfw including sex and language. the french. barely proof-read.
a/n : i cant believe there are no fics for this fine ass woman yet but i am nothing but a pioneer idk. in my daydreams this was like mafia au victoria but i literally never write or dream of those so i opted out lmao. go watch gen v. everyone always talks about how good the cover is but nonante-cinq by angele is a beautiful album so i recommend listening to that for french vibes. enjoy <3
it was the most stereotypical and overplayed song ever, but damn did you love la vie en rose.
just the concept of the song was romantic to you. to live every day like it would be magnificent, like you could know a day would be your last and look back at it and not regret a single thing. it meant looking at the world with a positivity that these days was mostly faked or artificial.
after the life you've lived, the things you've seen firsthand, you need that positive light in your life more than anything else. especially right now, as your manager is hounding you over the phone about your next gig.
now you loved your manager, nancy, you really did. she took you in and was honest when no one else would be, stood by you when no one else wanted to give you a real chance. but sometimes it felt like she didn't really believe in you. obviously, she believed you had talent, or else she would have 'left you in the dust for the rats to pick apart,' in her own words. it was almost like she couldn't fathom that what you had was real, like you didn't truly deserve all the things that were coming to you.
but as long as you were paying her, she didn't bother to speak up on it.
you were listening to her drone on and on into the speaker from your phone, holding the object up to your ear with one hand as you hold a menu to order something from the cafe waitress who's waiting beside you.
"ill have an uhhhh... le marie antoinette, and a coffee with sugar and cream please," you hand the menu to the waitress after she writes down your order, heading back into the cafe with a smile. this cafe was one of your favorites, nestled below an apartment building in one of the inner city arrondissements so you could sit outside beneath an umbrella and admire the city before you. "nancy, i don't see why i can't just...politely turn it down? it sounds like it's a glorified pin-up girl gig, le bellevilloise is offering for me to sing there exclusively for three months-"
"no, that's what im trying to tell you if you'd let me finish." you can hear nancy's telltale sigh through the phone. she had a short temper when she was stressed, something you sadly had in common, and you could hear her clicking a pen through the receiver. "this is an international gala slash fundraiser, attended by the one percent of the one percent. billionaires, senators, diplomats, everything. the event organizer asked for you specifically, so turning it down is a bad look. aka, you're doing it. go out and get a pretty dress. ill send you more details later."
the phone shut off and you let out a huff of air, crossing your right leg over your left beneath the table. once you have your meal and bite into your pastry you can't help but close your eyes at how good it tastes; the combination of the crunch of the macarons, the near-overwhelming sweetness of the cream, and the savory juice that leaks from the raspberries never gets old.
you don't know how you feel about this whole gala thing. sure its a great way to make connections and earn a fat stack of cash that will probably last you few weeks, but you've learned before that the people that you most admire, celebrities, politicians, even superheroes, can't be trusted. and being in a room full of them to perform wasn't at the top of your christmas wish list.
but like everyone else in the world, you were finding money hard to pass up on. just by the lowball nancy told you, you'd be able to comfortably pay the next month's rent and fix up your electric scooter, maybe even enough to save up for that beautiful flat you saw online with the grand windows and nice floor plan.
it'd only be a few hours of singing and kissing up to a bunch of snobs and you'd be done. easy peasy.
finding a dress wasn't to hard. your modeling connections from before you started to focus on singing gave you access to a few, good quality clearance pieces for your picking. you figure that the people you were performing for would prefer something classy and elegant, so you picked out a sleeveless black dress with black opera gloves, accessorized by a diamond necklace and earrings. one of your stylist friends, alex, who you asked to help do up your hair told you 'you're definitely gonna shag a rich man looking like this, just ask them if they have any friends for me!' and after a quick 'please don't wish that upon me' and a spritz of perfume you were ready.
the hours before you got on stage were nothing short of both nerve-racking but exhilarating. you rode in a standard taxi, your slight jitters noticed by the slightly balding man in the front. he eyes you pretty oddly when you got in the car before using you if you were a model, telling you that his daughter would like an autograph if you were. you felt slightly flustered when you had to tell him you weren't, but gave him some tips to tell his daughter if she wanted to pursue it. after around twenty minutes of driving through the city the car stops and you're escorted by a crew member into a grand building, those types you pass by and dream of getting the chance just to step into.
after that its a rush of meeting the event planner who gives you another run down of the evening and then meeting with the band members, a nice group of jazz players who you had heard about on the news for their blends of old and new methods of performing music. they played you a piece on their instruments in their dressing room, and it felt like hanging out with old friends listening to tunes as one twirled you around and the others laughed and the air felt warm and fuzzy.
later its time for your set, where you'll sing as the guests come in and take occasional breaks to save your breath and let whoever is hosting this talk. so you get up on your mini stage, make sure you look alright and you're in tune with the band, and then you do what you do best.
you've never felt better than how you do while you sing. every time you do so you tell a story, tales of success and tragedy and love and heartache. while you sing your favorite thing to do is to admire the crowd. when you were younger it gave you horrible stage fright, but as you grew up and saw just how much people loved your voice it made you confident, if not the tiniest bit narcissistic.
as you look out at the guests of tonight you see what's expected. important and powerful men donned in suits, their wives standing on their arms in glamourous gowns, you swear that you even see some fairly famous celebs in the mix, and they were all listening intently to you and your voice.
and that's when you saw her. near the back of the room with a glass of red wine in her hand, dark hair flowing over her shoulders, and darker eyes trained on you. in this profession you get used to people staring at you for hours on end, but something about this woman unnerves you slightly.
a short while later your set is over and after a round of applause the organizer tells you to enjoy yourselves, and that you're free to indulge in whatever food is left. after a brief touch-up in the dressing room and making sure you look presentable, you head out to get yourself something to eat. you keep getting stopped by people telling you how beautiful your performance was, how they'd love to get in contact with your agent to book you for future events, and your regular dose of creepy old guys hitting on you. but besides that things were going pretty well.
some servers were waking around with trays of champagne, but you figured since everything was complimentary you would treat yourself to something stronger. you head to the bar and order yourself a strong cocktail, and as soon as you finish your order a figure sits on the stool next to yours.
"get me a scotch on the rocks, thanks."
you glance at them from the corner of your eye and feel your heart beat faster when you see
it's the woman from before. from this close distance, you can admire her entirely, and god is she gorgeous. she looks so put together, not a hair out of place, and wearing a perfectly tailored suit that makes you guess she's some kind of wealthy businesswoman.
after not so secretly checking her out, she turns her body towards you and looks at you with a smile.
"im sure you already know, but you have an enchanting voice."
you look down bashfully, thinking the same about her. she speaks like she's so sure of what she's saying like there's no room for debate or argument.
"thank you. no matter if i know or not, it doesn't take much to make me a little nervous every time i perform."
the bartender brings over both of your drinks and she tilts hers to you.
"trust me, theres no need. you're nothing but a natural, one of the best singers i've ever heard."
"ah, now you're exaggerating. is there a reason you're complimenting me like you're being paid to do so?"
she shakes her head, setting down her glass of liquor with a clink. "not anything nefarious, if that's what you're thinking. just glad i get to talk to a beautifully talented woman."
jeez, she was laying it on thick. normally this was coming from some fifty-year-old man with greasy skin and weird teeth, but it felt nice coming from her. she was obviously gorgeous, leaving her body language open in case you wanted to decline and she would walk away in a moment's notice.
"im glad i get to talk to you too, miss?"
"victoria. its a pleasure to talk to you, miss y/n."
for around an hour or two the both of you sat at that bar, blocking out the fake laughs of investors and boisterous noises of people who got a little too friendly with the free champagne. she was so attentive to you. asking about what got you into singing and what brought you to paris by your non-native accent. you normally kept the finer details of your past a close-guarded secret, but you figured there couldn't come any harm from telling this attractive stranger a few things about yourself before never seeing her again.
"you're telling me at only sixteen years old, you flew to paris by yourself and made a living for yourself? you've got balls on you, sister."
"yeah yeah, but im nothing special. i just got tired of all the bullshit in the u.s., y'know? the greed, the cynicism, the-"
"superhero bullshit?"
you giggled while she smirked, observing your smile and how it made your eyes squinch.
"well i wouldn't put it like that but...superheros? really? its just, they make it so american, in a really really annoying way. i just couldn't deal with that being a reality. and where better than paris? it seems like voughts all but forgotten about it recently, thank god.”
"i understand. and i know we just met, but it does suit you. 'beautiful runaway finds passion, life, and love in the city of lights'. best cliche there is."
"and what a damn good cliche it is to be. although i haven't been that lucky on the love front."
her eyebrow raises and her nail traces around the rim of her glass.
"im sorry but i simply cant believe that. someone like you would have people lining up for a chance to talk to you, let alone date you."
you dryly chuckle before taking another long swig of your glass of champagne, dancing just on the edge of being intoxicated. you understood why everyone else was drinking this, it was sweet but strong.
"people have tried, of course. but sadly most of my escapades end in tragedy. very melodramatically. but enough about me, I'm guessing this isn't gonna go my way and you have someone waiting for you at home?"
"im offended you still think so low of me. but no, there was someone but it didn't work out. now its just me and my daughter."
god, she was a milf. if there was a god you prayed he would let you get lucky tonight.
"well, im sorry to hear it didnt work out."
"are you really?"
she looks at you with a smirk on her face.
"no, im not."
that was all she needed to ask you to come back with her to her hotel.
and not just any hotel, she was rich enough to be spending two weeks in the damn ritz. asking again what she did for a living didn't get you very far, the only hint you got being that it helped her change the world. ominous but whatever. it had to be legitimate if she was invited to that gala.
the cautious and common sense side of you is snuffed out for the night the moment she set her hand over the covered skin of your thigh in the car, the feeling of her hand on your lower back leading you through the pristine lobby of the hotel, that same hand helping you take off your dress and take you apart slowly over the rest of the night.
when you wake up the sun is peeking through the curtains, the softness of the sheets your laying on calling you back to sleep before you get up and look around.
you only got a few seconds to admire the room last night before victoria was on you, and now in the light of day you could truly take everything in. you find a note left by the woman, letting you know she had to leave temporarily for an important job thing and that she'd be back my lunch, inviting you to call up room service and enjoy the room intil then.
you were expecting for her to tell you to pack your shit up and go, so despite the oddness this was a nice surprise. besides, there was no way you were gonna pass up on ordering a five-star breakfast you didnt have to pay for.
after indulging in a meal brought by room service and finding ways to pass the time, you text your manager after she happily lets you know that your night was a success and that your payment should be cleared shortly. while you're in the middle of wondering if you should answer her query about the host wondering where you wandered off to last night, the sound of a door opening makes your head jerk towards the small entry area, victoria coming in through the doorway dressed in a tan suit and carrying a large black briefcase on her arm.
"ah, youre still here!,” she sets her bag on a glass table near the door and strides into the room, eyes connected with yours the whole time. you weren’t feeling nervous before, but under her gaze you wonder if maybe you should have taken that free meal along with some tiny soaps from the bathroom and headed back home.
“yeah, figured i’d stick around for whatever. besides, i had to stay and blame you for my manager thinking i got kidnapped.”
“i’ll make sure to apologize and send her an edible arrangement. besides, i hope to take up more of your time in the future.”
your eyes bulge so hard you’re sure you look like a moron. you cover it up by getting up to get yourself another cup of coffe from the tray the food came in on.
“well i should’ve guessed this was more than a one night stand when you allowed me to order up breakfast. but now i have to admit i’m slightly scared you’re actually plotting to traffick me.”
"trust me, that wouldn't be good for business. id just like to see you some more, if that would be alright with you.
was that an actual question? after the night you had and the way she’s been treating you, you didn’t see much of a choice except to say yes.
she tells you that a few hours later she has a flight back to america, but that she wouldn't mind spending the day with you if you're free. you agree to get a little bite to eat and it turns into a whirlwind day of showing her around the city you call your home. she has to wear giant sunglasses the whole time and have a mysterious security detail not too far behind, but you wouldn't change anything about it.
at the end of it all, she bids you goodbye in front of your taxi, admiring the cute outfit she bought for you so you wouldn't have to go home in your dress from the night prior, promising that she'll keep in touch with you once she gets settled in back a new york, jokingly telling you she'll send you a postcard. as you sit in the back of the taxi, your heart inflates a little as you take in the events of the last day. you never liked to mix business with pleasure in this way, partly because most of those business people were gross perverts and also that it could damage your career beyond repair, but with victoria you can't help but think that it was worth it.
eventually, a few days pass by, and the only calls you've gotten are from friends congratulating on what they heard was another great performance. and as nice as all the praise and the new gigs you started to get felt, the longer you heard no word back from victoria, it started to eat away at you inside.
back at your favorite cafe you sit with two of your oldest friends, jamie and chloe, as they ramble about the details of their changing lives and jobs. you don't know when you zoned out but eventually, chloe's manicured finger lightly pokes at your cheek, giggling when you make a playful motion to bite it.
"where'd you go just now? take me with you before jamie keeps talking about his new lover."
"hey!" jamie pouts, "you're just jealous because i've been regularly having passionate sex allll night long while you're still vying over your boss." you hear a shocked gasp behind him and you all turn to see an elderly couple looking at jamie like he's said the most blasphemous thing they've ever heard.
"really classy, james." you snort.
"what the hell! you're supposed to be on my side! everyone has noticed how you've been in a better mood since that gala. alex told us how they checked up on you afterwise and you showed up a day later with a new outfit and a hickey on your neck."
"that is- god, that’s so intrusive and so like them,” you rolled your eyes. you knew as soon as alex saw you that morning that they’d be gossiping to everyone about the state they saw you in. “and i don’t kiss and tell like that. at least not in public like this.”
“ok, so we’ll stop by your place tonight with some wine and talk all about it tonight. agree?”
“what? no-”
“agree!” chloe beams and shakes hands with jamie across the table, blowing you kisses before leaving her share of the bill on the table and leaving with some excuse of having to be somewhere. you glare at jamie as a warning before he gives you a kiss on the cheek and does the same. you grumble before biting into your muffin.
a few hours later you’re sitting on your soft sofa with jamie’s head in your lap and chloe on the other side, talking and laughing about old stories from your jobs. you take a sip of merlot right before jamie brings up what you were hoping they’d forgotten about by now.
“ok ok, enough chatter. seriously, chlo, you cackle like a seagull. y/n, when are you going to tell us about this mystery lover of yours? do you need another glass of wine to start talking?”
“don’t even think about pouring me another glass. look, there’s not much to say, ok? i was singing, she was staring at me from across the bar, we flirted a little, that was it!”
they stared.
“you want more?”
“how could we not? we haven’t seen you like this with anyone! not since we took you on that tourist tour on the seine!”
that…that took you for a spin. you remembered it clear as day, them tugging you along when they’d heard since you came to paris you’d been focusing on building up your image and working. it was more a joke, but the lights of the boat, the sky and the lights made you feel like you were in the most perfect moment of your life. hearing them compare that to how you looked now had a nervous feeling building in your gut.
“we spent the night together. and it was…good. really good. she let me stay while she went out, bought me a new outfit then said she’d be in touch.”
your friends are silent. way too silent. you’re afraid they’re about to laugh and judge you before they’re squealing and tackling you, pulling back when you groan after you almost spill your wine on your clothes.
"god, why are you always the lucky one? this isn't fair! at all!" chloe groans while dramatically resting her head on your shoulder, jamie still giggling as the wine clearly starts to take an effect on him. "please, please tell us what happens next before i scream."
"no thats- i mean, thats it. so far. for now." you stutter along your words as your friends' faces go blank yet again, except this time without a hint of a chuckle or smile.
"what the hell do you mean 'that's it.'? she ghosted you?" jamie gasps.
"no, she didnt ghost me-"
"sweetheart, im sorry to say this but you have been ghosted. in a really dickhead way."
"its not like that! she's a busy person with a serious job and a kid and responsibilities!"
you briefly hear chloe snicker "milf?" before you roll your eyes.
"she's gonna contact me. and even if she doesn't, maybe it was just a nice one-time thing! everyone knows I'm great at those."
jamie snickers before chloe smacks his shoulder in a second.
"why? why did you laugh?"
they share a look before she smacks his shoulder again.
"would you stop? i have pains, you know this. but y/n, we know you. we love you. but your latest stints haven't been...the most successful. or left you in the best headspaces."
"he's right, honey. remember the last girl, hannah? one of the worst situationships i've ever seen. you told us you would be alright when she broke it off and then we found you at that lousy bar at eleven in the morning..."
you start biting at your lip. there was nothing you hated more than when they told you the truth about how you could act. it wasn't your fault that all the time your relationships got messy, or that you got attached a little quickly. people didn't understand but a life like yours could be lonely. standing up on a stage and performing for people who want you to do just that and only that: sing and look like a glamourous pin-up doll. most of the time its the other performers who even bother to ask if your throat is alright after singing for hours.
so yes, sometimes you rushed into relationships. and you might have done it again in the dumbest way possible.
"i just...she let me stay after, y'know? and she came back and brought me with her again. why go through that effort just to leave me behind like trash?" your friends pouted before closing in to comfort you, rubbing your back and giving you small affirmations.
for a month you go into a rut. unless it's performing or going to the dentist for a checkup you don't leave your house. you become pretty good acquaintances with the grocery delivery boy, benny, who started panicking when he realized he forgot one of your items until you assured him it was fine. it wasn't the first time you'd grown so oddly attached to a romantic prospect, and it wasn't the first time you'd gotten hurt by it. you spend your time moping on your couch and binge-watching your favorite show for the third time when your phone buzzes from beside you.
nancy schmancy : call me.
you rolled your eyes. she could have just called you in the first place, but no. she had to be extra about it. you press the call button and don't have to wait even five seconds for her voice to ring in your ear.
"do you want to know what mister barbier just emailed me?"
"i think you already have that answer for me."
"he said, and i quote, 'tell y/n i send my best wishes. her performance last night was hauntingly beautiful, and i'm hoping it was one of her greatest acts yet.'"
"if you ask me, it sounds like i did a pretty good job."
"it sounds like he thought you were singing your damn suicide note!" she groaned, and you could hear her face scrunching from over the phone. "i don't know what is going on with you recently, and i don't want to sound insensitive, but if you can't manage to keep your work and personal life separate, even i can't help you make it far in this business. clients may say they want you to be expressive but they only mean so far. unhappy music means unhappy customers, capeche?"
"i understand, nancy. ill send a personal apology to mister barbier."
"good. ill call you soon to let you know about any new gigs. take care of yourself. seriously."
the line clicks and you toss your phone onto the couch and take another sip of sauvignon blanc from your rose-shaped wine glass. it pained you to admit it, but nancy had a point. if you kept letting yourself mope in your feelings you'd run out of people who wanted you to sing, and if the point came where you were out of gigs...you didn't even want to think about it. if you weren't singing you weren't living.
only a few hours after that call you manage to get back to normal. you go out and get your own groceries, deciding to indulge yourself and buy the ingredients for some recipe you saw online months ago. one of your clients cries at your performance, ecstatically telling you they'll be in talks with your manager to set up a stable contract. things really start to look up. two weeks later you even manage to get the number of a cute girl, elise, a tall woman with dyed hair who reached for the same vintage music box as you at an open market.
you're smiling as you look down at the messy ink on a slip of paper, the numbers and tiny smily face distracting you as you enter the hallway to your apartment. so distracted that you nearly trip over a object on the floor, looking down to see...a bouquet?
a really gorgeous bouquet you notice as you bend over to pick it up. its a collage of dusty blues and off-colored ivories, and when you brought it closer to your nose for a whiff you felt a sense of bliss. you bring it into your apartment with a skip in your step before you spot a piece of paper among the flowers, plucking it from the collection and reading it over.
upon closer inspection, you can see its a postcard, the cover a flattering shot of the statue of liberty with text that reads "love from new york city!". you try to calm your heart down at the location and the 'love' part, but you've already gotten your hopes up when you turn the card around to read the message:
xxx-xxx-xxxx
sorry for the wait. i'll make it up to you, angel.
you'd never felt so conflicted as you did in the past five seconds. half of you was vindicated that yes, this attractive woman didnt leave you high and dry and did actually have a deeper interest in you, but the other part was angry. and embarrassed that you were angry, because again, you spent less than a day with this woman, she didn't owe you anything. but also yes the hell she did.
before you could get yourself together you were harshly tapping the number into your cell, biting at your lip as the phone slowly rings.
"y/n, is that you?" echoes from the line, victorias voice sounding and running over your head like soft silk. no, no, stop it. focus.
"howd you know it was me? im sure you have other people who'd be calling you this late."
"certainly not anyone with a phone number from paris. besides, i was hoping it'd be you."
"well, i would have been flattered two weeks ago but unfortunately i dont think your words could phase me right now."
she sighs and the line goes silent. you feel bad for being catty for a few seconds before you brush it off. she's the one who played with your emotions and promised to call you but never did. she had this coming.
"im sorry, really i am. i've been busy with things at work and my daughter-"
damn it, she pulled the kid card again.
"i just...dont like being lied to. or led on. maybe its my fault for beeing too clingy-"
"no, no. dont apologize. if it means anything youve been on my mind for weeks now."
"yeah, same here. except my thoughts havent been all that nice." you laugh.
"deserved. and id like to make it up to you."
"oh yeah? let me guess, this time we'll spend two nights together?"
"close. how about two weeks. in new york."
you don't know if you should laugh. you feel like you should, so you do. but she isn't.
"you...you're being serious."
"im being serious."
what do you even say? what do you even do? of course, whatever higher power there is would make your life stable and steady for the past few months then throw this in to shake you up. you really should have been expecting it, considering...
you shake yourself back to the present. victoria is still waiting on the other line, unwilling to rush you into a decision, apparently. you'd applaud her for her chivalry if you weren't so stunned.
"victoria, come on. we've only met once, and while it was nice it was brief. now you want me to upend my life and career to jet off to america? it sounds crazy."
"you make me a bit crazy, honestly. besides, you were telling me in bed you haven't been in the states since you left, i have a feeling you miss it more than you let on."
you shuffle in your spot, reminded that you're standing in your cold-ass kitchen and you haven't changed out of the outfit you wore out today. but half of your uncomfortableness is from a feeling gnawing at your chest because she's right. at this point you can barely remember the night you left your childhood home, but you know it was rushed. you wanted to forget everything.
"i think you're also forgetting that i have a blossoming career here. are you gonna pay my definitely going to be pissed off manager her wages? plus i was supposed to be first pick for this really good gig-"
"i'll pay for everything, i promise. dont forget that i have connections. in two weeks they''ll be singing you praises across the globe."
you close your eyes and take in a breath.
"can you make my ticket first class?"
-
one thing you didnt miss about america? just how...much everything was, all the time.
your flight was quiet. victoria didnt hesitate to book you an expensive ticket, almost taking offense to your request for a nice one and scheduling you for business class, sending you a text to get lots of rest in the ultra-luxe beds on the plane. it was probably one of the best nights sleeps you'd had in months.
when you got off the plane there were two tall escorts holding a sign with your last name on it, taking the suitcases from your hands before you could say anything and leading you into a sleek black car. a voice in the back of your head starts screaming but you ignore it. for now.
the men in the car give you some basic rundowns, how they'll constantly be hovering over you during your stay for your "protection", and that they'll be taking you to settle into a hotel until victoria makes contact, and the little voice starts freaking out again and telling you that you've slept with and are fraternizing with a mob boss. at least it's more exciting than your last few flings.
the car goes silent after that, and you put in your earbuds as you watch the city go by. you weren't from new york, but you loved watching movies set in the bustling cityscape. the buildings really are humongous, and you see so many different types of people it sets your brain on a whirlwind.
you look back down at your phone after the fifth 'the seven' advertisement in one block.
yet again you're led into a clearly extremely expensive hotel, breezing through reception before you are led to a luxuriant hotel room, the bodyguards ignoring you as you giggle and flop onto the bed, waving them off when they tell you they'll be posted outside.
the sheets feel heavenly on your skin, and with the soft sunshine from the window beaming down on you and the gentle hustle and bustle of new york outside, you think you could fall asleep in a minute. but, begrudgingly, you peel yourself form the bed and open your suitcase to start putting your clothes away before taking a quick shower in the giant bathtub.
just as you exit the shower and wrap your body in a towel, your phone starts ringing and as soon as you read the 'v' in the contact name you push answer and bring it to your ear.
"hello? vic?"
"hey, hon. eager to talk to me?"
"you called me. and 'hon'? really? we've moved to petnames already?"
"figured id start making up for those weeks with no contact. and id like to do so again tonight. i wanna bring you somewhere."
your mouth quirks up in a smile as you re-adjust the towel around your body, the phone nearly slipping from its quick placement between your phone and ear, "id really like that. i hope its out to dinner, i didnt care to eat any of the plane food."
“yes, it’s to dinner. but its up to you if you want it to be fancy or casual. i know its tacky but there’s this pretty cute french place near where i live...”
“that vaguely sounds like an invitation to your place, but ill let it slide. are you gonna pick me up or are your special agents going to escort me everywhere for the next few weeks?”
“special agents? what agents?”
a bead of water drips from your neck down your back and it feels like the tip of a knife. a pressure builds in the back of your throat and your fingers grip the fabric of your towel. “what…that’s a joke, right?”
her laughter rings in your ear and you are seconds away from hanging up the call.
“sorry, sorry. i sometimes have a weird sense of humor. you'll get used to it.”
“i doubt it.”
“and i'm hopeful. i'll let you go so you can get ready, i'll be by in under an hour.”
you hang up after a sweet goodbye and gently sit on the toilet. your brain is rushing to catch up after the conversation like your body goes on autopilot when you hear victoria's voice. its terrifying and its thrilling. and you don't know why a part of you likes the feeling.
after you brush your teeth, do some quick skincare, debate over shaving just in case, and spend twenty minutes picking out a cute outfit, you finally hear the gentle knocking on the door while you're double-checking over the content of your purse.
rushing to open the door, you're greeted with the sight of a smiling victoria, her hands tucked into the pants of her clearly expensive pinstriped pantsuit. you're admiring the look of her hair tucked back into a ponytail when she's reaching forward and pressing a soft kiss to your cheek.
"you look perfect. come on, i made us a reservation."
and it turned out to be a perfect night. she did end up taking you to the french place, allowing you to order whatever you wanted. that place was weirdly empty, only a handful of other patrons inside. you were pleased to see that the waitress was french herself, having a small chat about the customs and foods she missed while she praised the authenticity of the food at the restaurant.
only a day and you had already forgotten how forward the people back home could be, because the waitress throws a subtle look at victoria and compliments you on finding such an attractive woman. when she leaves vic just smiles.
“ok, id say at this point we’re doing pretty good with the communication thing, right?” you ask, taking a sip of the pricey wine your date ordered.
“yeah, id say that.”
you finger the rim of your glass, the nerves getting to you before you ask your question. "i want you to tell me what your job is. your actual job, not some vague ass title. you have security following gus around, so i feel like i should know."
"no, no, you're right. i just didnt wanna scare you off. or have you think differently of me once i told you." she sighs, thumbing the napkins on the table. "i work in the government. i'm a congresswoman, to be exact."
you don't doubt she's a politician for a second, because she shows no hint of nervousness at your lack of emotion.
"are you...a good congresswoman?"
"i don't really know how to answer that." she laughs.
"i'm sorry. i knew you were important enough to be at that gala, but a politician is...tricky."
she reaches across the table and lays her hand palm up, smiling when you rest yours on top of it. "look, i get it. i should have told you sooner but please understand why i didn't. i wanted to get to know you as normally as possible, without all of the press and politics in the way."
"normally as possible, huh? that includes sleeping together on the first night?"
you're trying to show your acceptance of the situation with your humor, but you can tell victoria can sense your uneasiness at the situation. here you were thinking you had found some under-the-radar millionaire to dote on you and instead, you'd roped in someone whose job was entirely in the public eye that could be put in danger at the flip of a switch.
"how about we finish up and take this back to my place? i'll tell you everything that you wanna know about me. no matter how personal."
you stare into her eyes for a few seconds and decide that she looks genuine, getting confirmation that her daughter is staying with a friend before ending your meal and following her to her place.
for the amount of money she's ready to spend on you, you're surprised to see that victoria lives in a chic but quaint townhome only a twenty-minute walk from the restaurant. she gently takes off your coat and instructs you to sit with her on the couch, pressing on a remote to turn on her fireplace.
after a few hours and two more glasses of wine, victoria had opened up to you about nearly everything in her life. the mysterious death of her birth family, being adopted by a man who helped pushed her to go into a political career, her polite but loveless marriage with her ex. she even shows you a picture of zoe that she has in her wallet, taking the chance to gush over her daughter. she seems like such a sweet girl.
maybe it's the wine or maybe it's the way vic is opening up to you so freely, but you decide to tell her more about your past. how you always wondered why you barely stuggled moving to another continent at such a young age, or the fact that you dont even remeber why you had the drive to leave your parents home in the first place. you didnt even remember the last words you said to each other.
and throughout it all she's nothing if not attentive, she doesnt ask questions unless you give her permission too, keeping her eyes on you and gently placing her hand over yours.
you feel a turning in your stomach when she moves a stray hand of hair behind your ear. you told yourself to try taking things slow this time, but your body is starting to feel fuzzy and shes looking at you like she wants to devour you.
she decides to indulge you and gently brushes her lips against yours, smiling at the way your breath staggers. your head moves forwards to finaly get her to kiss you but she jerks her head back.
"i want you to tell me what to do."
god, your stomach feels hot. this is new, but a really arousing style of new. the last time you both slept together she had taken a careful but unwavering charge, unraveling you with a steady hand a sweet smile.
"cmon just...please?"
"no. tell me what you want me to do."
you sigh and bite at your lip. "i want you to lay me down and fuck me. right now."
so she laid you down and she did. there were no words to describe how much you enjoyed that night on her couch, the way she could read your body like a book and brought you to ecstasy again and again and again...
and when you wake up a soft blanket is draped over your body, a brekfast of coffee and some crepes set in front of you.
the days after are a whirlwind. discreetly as possible victoria takes you on a tour of new york city, to more expensive restaurants and hidden jewels that most tourists skipped over.
youre lounging in your hotel room when you decide to inform your friends of how your trip is going. while slightly hesitant they seemed more than happy that you were enjoying yourself with someone who took a genuine interest in you.
until you told them her job.
"my love, are you insane? a politician?"
"an american politician?" chloe gasps, continuing off of jamies shock.
"hey, im american too dont forget!"
"of course you are, but please, you understand why this is not good, no?"
"you know how fishy they are, especially with all the supe business going on. that place is getting more dangerous by the day, and i dont think you should be seeing someone whos contirbuting to that."
it pained you to admit it but jamie had a point. the three of you would always laugh in amused horror at how badly things were going on in your birth country, and the politics...it was less than pleasant.
not to mention the supe business. every corner of the world had to deal with the annoyance that was vought and their "products", even france. but so far you'd just had to deal with a few perverted looks from traveling supers and talks of some stupid theme park a few miles out of the city. meanwhile, it seemed like every day a new superhero was being introduced to the American public. it unnerved you.
"i understand. i appreciate both of you looking out for me. trust me, i'll be on my guard for now on." you mumble, picking at the material of your sleeve.
"of course, songbird. we'll call again soon."
the call ends and drop your phone on the nightstand. you look at the eiffel tower cutout in your phone case and your heart aches.
the next morning you're eating a a breakfast of coffee and fruit crepes when your phone rings, dragging your atttention away from the trashy dating show you were watching on the bedroom's tv. when you see nancy's name you hesitantly answer the call.
"nance? is everything alright?"
"everything is great. i'm just here to check in about your next gig."
"my next- nance, im on vacation. please tell you didnt forget and booked me for a job when im across the ocean."
"no, im not that stupid, hon." she sighs. "i didnt even arrange this job, victoria did. im just the messenger."
you blink once. then twice. you remember vic saying something about helping you with a job but you honestly just thought that was bullshit to get her to come stay with you.
(or get in your pants. but you don’t think you’d be too upset about that now.)
“ok. thank you, nancy. tell me the details.”
it’s a lot more extravagant than you expected. victorias friend, an actual senator, was holding a fundraising event for some government program he and vic were both involved in. nancy wasn’t told what the program was, but that you would have to go through a security debrief before being told you'd be given a team to help you prepare. and picking from a selected closet of dresses. fun.
you ignore the feeling of nervousness that’s building up in your gut. because while all of your gigs were important, they were never this important. you push it down as you call victoria and thank her endlessly, when you tell your friends the minimum amount that you can tell them, and when victoria picks you up from outside your hotel twelve hours before the event even starts.
she pressed a small kiss to your hand, laughing at the grumpy and tired mumble you let out when you sit in the car seat. it only passes once she gives you a coffee she picked up, the caffeine waking you up and putting a smile on your face.
the content feeling turns into shock when you enter victorias' place and see zoe, vic throwing a short explanation of “busy babysitter” over her shoulder as she heads into the kitchen.
its a bit awkward at first, sitting on one couch as she plays on a black nintendo switch on the other. it helps when you ask her about whatever she’s playing, the girl diving into a rant about the farm game she’s playing and how she’s trying to catch a certain type of fish.
victoria comes back with a tray of breakfast for the three of you before asking her daughter how school is going, how her friends are, etc. its nice to get a glimpse into victories private life during the morning, the close bond she has with her daughter. you notice some tension but decide not to bring it up.
the morning goes by too quickly, zoe being picked up to be dropped off at a friend's house after giving you a sweet goodbye and you getting rushed upstairs as the team comes to the townhome to help you prepare. its a nice change, having other people doll you up instead of having to worry about trying to do everything correctly and by yourself. and its a perk you don't have to spend your own money to do it.
the team members are nice but punctual, finishing your hair and makeup in record time with not a second wasted. you barely get time to notice yourself in the mirror before you're ushered into a gorgeous gown, soft fabrics and a chic and elegant style.
when your finished you’re finally allowed to observe yourself while your transportation and is prepared, and it feels like you’re looking at a dream version of yourself.
as you admire yourself in the mirror vic comes up next to you, clearly enjoying herself as her eyes slowly drift up and down your body.
“you look…ethereal.” she whispers, pressing a small kiss to your cheek after you turn to smile at her.
“only because of you. i don’t know how i could ever make this up to you, vic. this is just…”
“trust me, you’ve already done enough.”
while you knew there would be some press at the event, you didn't expect over two dozen paparazzi to quickly start flashing their cameras in your direction as soon as you got out of your ride. questions about who you were wearing, the relationship you had with vic, etcetera etcetera. you would've buckled from the sudden pressure if it weren't for victoria’s steady hand on your waist, the press of her arm through her red pantsuit.
the venue is downright insane, so grand you start to wonder if you're in one of those gilded age mansions you used to read about in new york magazines. climbing pillars and art on the ceiling of the main hall, which you don't get to admire since you’re yet again whisked away to get ready.
after a few more touch ups you aren’t afforded a minute to prepare, guided to the edge of the performance area. the sinking feeling is back in your stomach. the biggest moment of your life and you feel like you’re going to be sick.
the lights dim and you glide onto the stage, able to see the shadows of the guests faces from the flickering table lights. it’s eerie, the amount of them staring up at you with eyes you can’t even see.
you were given a set list a few days prior, only a couple of songs for the payment you would apparently receive after this. the songs piqued your interest, a collection of classical melancholic pieces from around the fifties. vic told you her friend was a vintage nut, but you didn't know why he chose these for you to perform when the event seemed to have an uplifting aura.
either way it felt…different, singing this time. the spotlight was on you and you’ve never felt as beautiful as you did in this moment. everyone was watching you, so hooked on the melodies escaping your body that you could see the emotions brining some people to the edge of their seats.
you don’t let it show but you grow a bit anxious at the sight of supers in their uniforms in the crowd. you don’t see anyone from the seven, but you do notice a woman you recognized from some commercial about climate change and earth preservation, the green of her dress and the nature motifs in her outfit give you a clue as to what her power was.
just when you feel yourself about to slip, dangerously close to hitting a note at a weird pitch, you see victoria, getting deja vu at the sight of her staring at you from the bar like the first night you met. she's looking at you like she's never doubted you for a second, like you're an angel sent from above that's blessed her life.
you hold her gaze when you sing. noticing the soft smile on her face when you sing a lyric about how the feelings in your heart feel so intense you fear you're going insane.
when the first song ends the lights come back on and you're met with a polite yet thunderous applause, the smile on your face so wide your cheeks start to hurt. the presenter comes back on stage, praising your performance with a swipe at his eyes before telling the guests that the host would be on shortly, and after he gives a short speech you'd be back to sing some more. with a gentle nod and wave, you step off the stage.
you feel like you're walking on air, with no doubt that was one of your best performances yet. your emotions got a little intense there but nothing you couldn't manage, and everyone seemed to like it anyway.
you're able to send a quick text and a picture to jamie and chloe before you hear the sound of the door to your quaint dressing room open, not able to turn around before you feel hands around your waist and plush lips on the side of your neck, the sight of victoria wrapped around you in the mirror making butterflies swarm in your stomach.
"i take it you liked my singing?"
"like doesn't even begin to cover it," she mumbles into your neck, raising her head slightly to be able to hold eye contact through the mirror. "i'm so lucky i found you, y'know that?"
you playfully brush her off, telling her you have to freshen up for some mingling before you get back on stage. she gladly helps you with your makeup, and while you weren't expecting her to be so touchy tonight you definitely aren't complaining, especially when her hand starts to drift closer to the space between your legs. it takes an embarrassing amount of mental strength to deny her, promising you'll continue once you go back to her place.
once you're finished getting ready she leads you back out to the hall, introducing you to numerous business people, politicians, celebrities, etc. you try not to fangirl when you meet a singer whose songs you've been obsessed with lately and when she asks you to perform at her cousins wedding. victoria just smirks when she leads you away and you let out a tiny squeal under your breath.
once the networking is done you're able to take the time to sit down and eat some of the catered food, almost moaning at the tastes of the food. you sometimes forget just how good food could be in the states, and these rich people pulled out all the stops. you try not to eat too quickly or impolitely as victoria talks with her tablemates, some people from her job apparently. after the first introductions and praises they gave you you mentally tapped out of the situation. she luckily covers for you when they question your mood, laughing when she tells them you've had a long day of being treated like a singing barbie doll.
everyone in the room quiets down when the hos taakes the stage and starts his speech. he introduces himself as robert stendham, and you feel a little embarrassed that this man gave you the chance to sing here and you didn't even know his name. you're thinking about how odd it is that you weren't introduced before this when he mentions something about the program and you perk up.
"...extend a personal thank you to general jameson for finding the time to escape his duties to fly in and be here with us tonight, and a special thanks to director neuman for helping me with this project and finding the beautifully talented y/n to perform for us tonight."
there was a brief few seconds of applause, victoria looking around and giving out smiles while you wondered what the hell she was the director of.
"as you can see, we have a few supers with us tonight. people like hazelwood, whose efforts against climate change have lead to over a dozen organizations plating millions of trees and clearing millions of pounds of trash for the ocean. because that's what supers are supposed to do-protect us. not act like degenerates who get to do what they want because of their abilities."
your eyebrow twitches, sensing the slight anti-supe propaganda from the end of his speech. well, not anti every supe, just the ones who act like gods among men, which you could understand. but you still felt an uneasy feeling rising in your stomach. you feel vic's palm rest over the top of your hand under the table.
"which is why im incredibly honored that director and congresswoman neuman has extended a hand to me to invest in the federal bureau of superhuman affairs, and to further extend that hand to you to help participate in this monumental institution..."
everything is a fog and your brain taps out once he starts talking about what this burerua does, how they closely monitor supes and jail the ones who've caused public harm. your head feels hot and your chest feels cold, and you can't stop your body from going on auto-pilot and excusing yourself to the bathroom before finding some balcony on the higher floor.
the cold air of new york shocks your body back into normalcy, but the pounding in your head persists. it feels like a panic attack ut so much worse, like your fight or flight has been activated without anything even happening. had you rushed into all of this? chasing a girl and a dream like you were a teenager again?
yet again the door opens behind you and someone comes to stand next to you, able to tell who it is by the scent of brown sugar and the glimpse of dark hair blowing with the slight breeze.
"you alright? mr. brandon from the tech startup was asking about you, tried to make me invest in some room light plant grower hybrid-"
"why did you bring me here?"
you cut her off and the air is quiet, save for the sounds of cars and the city and the wind. it's weird, standing in a tense silence like this with her.
"how are you feeling?" she whispers .
"are you- " you turn, nearly giving yourself whiplash with the speed at which you turn to look at her. the look on her face, like she's just observing you and how you're reacting. it only upsets you more. "are you being serious?"
"yes, i am. tell me."
"no, answer my question first. why are you avoiding it?"
she sighs, brushing a few strands of hair away from her face before reaching to grab your hand, which you hesitantly let her hold.
"as you heard, im part of a buereau that monitors supherhumans, keeping track of them, making sure they cant use their powers for harm. so far we've only had to deal with supes here in the states. until one day, this couple comes in that believe their daughter has used her powers on them."
she reaches for something in her pocket and your grip tightens. she pulls out a polaroid and holds the picture up for you to see. you feel like you're going to vomit when you see you, smiling, standing with your parents in a backyard.
"what...what is this? how'd you get this?"
"the couple gave me this picture, and told me how weird the least few years have been. friends and family asking where their daughter went, how she was doing, a daughter they didnt even remeber having."
you bring a hand up to your head, hopelessly trying to dissipate the splitting headache that's forming.
"but then they said the memories started coming back. glimpses of a child running in the grass, birthday parties, graduations, talent shows-"
"stop, please just stop." you gasp, hunching over as good as you can with the restrictions of your gown. it doesn't even feel like the world is just spinning, it feels like its being played in some celestial game of pool. "so what, you're saying...you're saying i did that? to my parents?"
"yes," she reaches for the side of your face, guiding you to look up at her. "and you can do so much more. you already have."
this can't be happening.
"why do you think people react so emotionally to your singing? you think its just because you're amazing? that's not even half of it."
your breathing is picking up again.
flashes of memories start appearing in your vision. so many happy times with your parents that you forgot, friends that you left behind. how your parents didn't support your half-thought-out plan to become a singer, how you made them forget. made yourself forget.
"i don't want you to think i did all of this just for what i want. i didn't. i care about you, and i want you to help me. but you need to trust me."
the blood is rushing back and from your head, and you think about how weird her eyes look against the backdrop of the city before you pass out.
finally. FINALLY. ong i wrote like 1k in the past day because i said just get this shit over with but its done! 5 months later! hope you enjoyed :)
#the boys#the boys x reader#the boys series#the boys smut#gen v#gen v x reader#victoria neuman x reader#victoria neuman#victoria x reader#victoria neuman fluff#victoria neuman angst#victoria neuman smut
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𝕿𝖔𝖝𝖎𝖈 𝕾𝖙𝖆𝖓𝖉𝖆𝖗𝖉𝖘
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Shinchiro Sano x Reader
Beeing called Ugly and beeing rejected broke him,and the only thing that brought him away from those events were late night rides…
Tw:Racing,Toxic beauty standarts,being called ugly
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Lights flew by and the world went silent,the thoughts in his head went silent.There were only the Road,his bike and him no one else,behind the tinted visor could no one see him.Nobody could see his ugly face that he was cursed with,being rejected for the 20th time now made him overthink was he too ugly to love?too difficult to love?.
He had to break away from his thoughts cause a red light came up.His bike came to a halt,he looked up and waited for the light to turn green.All of a sudden he heard a sound,a very familiar one.It was the sound of his dream bike a Kawasaki Ninja H2R ,this beauty could speed up to almost 400 km/h and could get to 200 km/h in 6,5 seconds.A beautiful bike and a pricey one too.
Engine sounds got louder and the Bike rolled into view the driver was smaller than him he could see,had black sweats on and a grey oversized hoodie.The Visor of the helmet was also tinted just like his.
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Traffic around Tokyo at this time was calm and the streets were free which was perfect so he could push his bike to the limit.
But the Driver of the Kawaskai still haunted his Mind,he wanted to be friends with this guy he had good taste in bikes.If he was lucky he will see him again.
He took the way to the freeway of Tokyo and a bike rushed by him.It was the guy.He looked right and left and chased after him,his bike was with its’s 150 km/h at its limit but the driver im front of him was slowing down all of a sudden so after a couple of second they were right beside each other.His opposite was going faster and slower which meant he wanted a race which he will accept.He gave his opposite a hand sign,and so they race began.
Cause of the Speed difference the bikes had the other driver was going slower.
The Race was going off Road to a path that led up to a abandoned Shrine.Shinchiro was glad that he choose Tires that could also go off Road so the gravely street was nothing to worry about.
His opposite was the first to arrive at the top of the shrine.He had to accept his loss.
❁•❁•❁•❁•❁•❁•❁•❁•❁•❁•❁•❁
The engine of his bike went out as he parked his bike beside the other drivers.
His helmet was on the seat of the bike so he was probably in the abandoned Shrine.
To gratulate his opponent he went in too.There he was standing he was a little bit smaller than him,he approached the person.
“Congratulations on the win” he said out loud.
“Thank you…” a feminine voice replied.
Its a woman.A woman who rides Bikes was uncommon.
“Ur a woman i…” he whispers.
“U did not expect me to drive a Bike” the feminine voice cut him off.
The woman turns around and reveals her face,she was gorgeous her hair was shiny,and her eyes were glittering in the moon light she was…perfect.
Her eyes widened as she saw him,which made him back off a little.
“I..uhm..did…not…ah…think my opponent was that…good…looking” she stutters.
What?She called him,HIM Shinchiro Sano good locking SHE the beautiful woman who drove a absolute menace of a bike she called him good locking.
“Good Joke” he replied and scratched the back of his head.
“Huh? what do you mean u look fine…” her voice had a nervous undertone.
“No,i got rejected by 20 Girls” he confessed to the stranger.
“Excuse me WHAT?!” his opposite replied.
“The story is true” he confirmed.
“I mean i understand when people reject me but u,i think some girls dream to be your girlfriend.” she said.
She understands why she gets rejected.Shes beautiful and a talented bike driver why would any guy with a right mind reject her.
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“I dont understand why guys reject you” he says in a serious voice.
“Just look at me…” she says.
“I do” his voice was deeper now.
He closed the gap between her and him.
“I look at you and i see a absolutely beautiful woman”
Her eyes meet his and her lips get closer to his,the gap between them was closed by Shinchiro.
Holy Fuck did her lips feel good on his.She pulled him closer and laid her hands in his neck.
He will now drive more often around tokyo around.But that not alone cause there was no need in anyone rejecting him.Cause he found his girl.
❁•❁•❁•❁•❁•❁•❁•❁•❁•❁•❁•❁
#shinchiro sano#sano mikey manjiro#ran haitani#rindou haitani#tokyo revengers#bonten#izana kurokawa#ran x reader#rindou x reader#sanzu haruchiyo#tenjiku#tokyo manji gang#tokyo rev x reader#baji x reader#mitsuya x reader#anime#mikey sano#emma sano#sano manjiro x reader#ken ryuguji#hanagaki takemichi#tokyo revengers baji#tokrev rindou#black dragon#mitsuya takashi#taiju shiba#wakasa imaushi
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what bollywood songs do you think best describe your mutuals?
ohmygosh this ask is a bomb fr i really had to go through my playlist to find the one that suits them the best so here we go, i've added a bit of translations for some friends too 🩷 (i've added the songs below the descriptions for each)
@misschanadlerbong is certainly this i've been saying this for a long time now and idk how to explain this suits her vibe very perfectly and sonam kapoor in the movie again suits my hopeless romantic like yes
@everloving-avenue is the sweetest angel in existence and the words say "i don't know why but my heart knows i'll be alright as long as you are here, the one that makes me laugh even when im crying, it's you" i don't even need to say more ps. i associated this with mark before hence proving again mark and her are the same person, except for the fact that i love her more, sorry mark.
@nightfalls-teddy is this because the vibes match with her par excellent music taste and then the lyrics say "your friendship has me intoxicated like country vine, your sweet and sour talks get me high, this journey of life feels carefree, a friend knows about another friend" and no ash this isn't about you and haechan
@jaehunnyy is literally my precious baby and lyrics go like "my sweetheart how do i explain it to you how adorable i find you, the more im with you the more i wanna tell you" and she's perfectly a pretty woman both on the inside and outside, to me this songs suits her the best fr
@foziee is actually my jigar da tukda (piece of my heart) she's also the youngest moot i have and undoubtedly she's the cutest but at the same time she's a savage literally so chill and so fun but she's also has a soft caring spot and she's cuter than her golden retriever
@onyourhyuck is another beautiful beautiful friend and this song talks about "oh beautiful white dove, flap your wings and fly and reach the heights that no one has reached and keep on moving forward and forward without any fear" the meanings and ryhrms are perfect like herself it's aptly fitting her precious vibes
@partiallyderived is clearly my jaan i know she said she was dilliwali girlfriend before but again idk how to explain it's the very sassy and queen like energy she gives off it's all very very diva like and i know how badly she wishes the guy in the car was phanbin that's why this is her
@whereisahana is again such a queen i can't even explain and she's so chill and so relatable yet so smart and she excludes confidence through texts the first thing i thought of was this naturally
@its-me-satine is an angel undoubtedly and she has the sweetest heart and she feels like she walked out of a novel and this song literally has stand by me mixed with which again feels like her, it says "there's no other word like your name i've read a hundred books a hundred times" i can picture her doing the things she loves while this plays in the background
@maraudersbitchesassemble is this one totally like do you know about her and her many talents and the gorgeous gorgeous vibes she gives off i don't even need to say anything more she seems so artistic to me honestly
@asahix9 is this song and this app won't let me add more than 10 audios so here i am adding the link to the song and this song goes like "this life is in the arms of the sun, breaths are the sunrays and talks are sunshine" and it's honestly such a fun loving and cute song like herself it's about loving more and spreading more love around
🩷✨️
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fav moots and why?
@reminiscentreader my favorite favorite being on this planet ( other than my mom pls ), my other half, my literal sunshine, im the happiest person that she even exists and is friends with me
@sophiesonlinediary gorgeous, kind, sweet, also my boss ( bc im apparently her oompa loompa 😔🫶🏼 ) literally an inspiration, take notes <3
@urbanflorals emsies!!!!! literally the most multi talented person ever. like this woman writes, bakes, draws, edits??? literally what more can you ask for?
@mrswarnerxo js started getting close to you but your music taste is insanely hot, like goddamn 🗣🗣❗️❗️🔥🔥 and your entire personality is hot dude
i also love every other person im moots with <33
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Smooth Like Butter
"Crawling back to you. Ever thought of calling when you've had a few? 'Cause I always do. Maybe I'm too busy being yours to fall for somebody new. Now I've thought it through."
osamu dazai
a/n: im disappointed in myself gonna pray to god after this ogs know its a repost. will rlly kms if it doesn’t show up in tags LMAO
chilling- this box is chilling. the only l times you have caught sight of an outside world is when a handsome, bandaged man opens the lid.
through the box, you can always hear the bandaged man out with a woman, a different one every time. he grabs the cheap liquor before he closes the fridge once more- leaving you in a chilling box.
it's midnight. you can hear the door slam through the fridge door. "ahh, what a shame! no beautiful woman wanted to come home with me this week.." the man sighed, opening the fridge. "hmm... ah.. the man gasped before giggling to himself.
he grabbed your box and sat you onto the counter. what would he do? was he going to cook something? no- the only thing this man had in his fridge was liquor, leftover cup noodles, and you.
"hm, should be good enough.." the man pressed his fingers along your cold lid before removing it, revealing the handsome man once more.
he pressed his finger against your crevices. bumping his finger on every hill before reaching the end of the tin—licking his fingers, the salty yet creamy taste touching his talented tongue.
"haah- this is so shameful.." the man muttered, his chest starting the heave. "ahaha, whatever, it's not like anybody'll check on me at this time of night…"
the man unzipped his beige pants and removed his black boxers- he grabbed handful of your fluffed cream before placing the cream onto the head of his penis.
"aah…" the man shuddered, thrusting into his chilled fist. "shit- hngh! this feels- haah- pretty good.." he huffed, slowing down as he placed his unoccupied hand onto the counter.
the oiliness of the butter made his cock practically slide himself into his own hand. “fuck, fuck- gh!" he moaned; his ivory white cum splattering onto the cabinet doors.
slowing down— the man put a finger onto the tip of his cock then into his mouth. "mmh... not bad, aha. the man laughed to himself, the saltiness of the butter perfectly balancing the bitterness of his cum.
"god, why am i like this." the handsome man groaned as he grabbed a tissue from the box near his futon.
#this made me hate myself bro plz#mod maki#bungo stray dogs imagines#bungo stray dogs x reader#bungo stray dogs#bungo stray dogs smut#bungou stray dogs imagines#bungou stray dogs x reader#bungou sd#bungou stray dogs#bsd#bsd imagines#bsd x reader#bsd smut#dazai osamu#osamu dazai#dazai osamu x reader#osamu dazai x reader#dazai smut#dazai x reader
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hi, can I ask for your top ten favorite fics ? :)
Hi anon hiiiiiiii welcome!!! u caught me at a good time, ur soooo lucky bc i just glanced at my notifs and saw this ask get sent <3 KDBDKDKK its been literal years since i checked my ask box 👉🏻👈🏻
BUT ANYWAY! top 10 of all time???? be warned that while i am currently enchanted with ONE (1) 6 ft 3 in actress, I still do consider myself a girlie with varied tastes so. my old & other fandoms are mixed in my current list!
without further ado:
#10: knowledge for knowledge's sake by tigriswolf (ao3) || quite an old piece detailing how a change in the personality of one Hermione Granger could have had a massive impact to the story— and while I don't fuck with JKTerfling, the fics I've read from the old fans in the HP fandom are still honestly, some of the BEST I have EVER read. This one in particular irrevocably changed me as a teen, and is one story that I continue to draw inspiration upon when I create dark!AUs for my SI/OCs.
#9: Zutopia by itslivybear (ao3) || the fluff, the worldbuilding, an AU where Izuku is mentored by our beloved Rat God & together, they fix the world problems? GIRLIES catch me forever LOVING this concept like you could NEVER believe <3
#8: (not so) Bad Idea by @sarahpaulsonsoftie (tumblr post) || HEE HEE ITS LIVING IN MY MIND RENT FREE LIKE HELP THESE BITCHES GAY!!!!!! GOOD FOR THEM!!!!!!! ft a meddling plantita who really mothered; Marilyn Thornhill <3
#7: Hold my Soul by connyhascontrol (ao3) || I got into Trixie/Katya completely by one @montaguehphm introducing me to UNHhhh (HIIIIIII bestie I hope everything is going good and that ur gay keeps slay <3) and I haven't recovered ever since— reading the fics by writers on AO3 was a happy little accident, but one i will FOREVER love, nonetheless. Anyway, this particular fic was SO brilliantly original and YET so entrenched in the personalities between T&K that it ABSOLUTELY just wrecks me everytime I reread it. anyways hi @connyhascontrol pls know ur brilliant <3
#6: I think I'm gonna call him out by hellelf (ao3, users only) || again, another AU for Hermione fic, that's chockfull of world building and interesting relationships! It's been unupdated from its 5 chapters since 2021, but I still LOVE to look back at it from time to time 💖
#5: The Confectionary Chronicles series by cheshire_caroll (ao3); Into the Black series by angelholme (ao3); Hermione Granger & the Serpent's Renaissance series by epsi1on (ao3) AND New Blood by artemisgirl (ff.net) || if it's not evident, i am an absolute slut for fics ft. Hermione being badass & put into a v cool plot w/ insane amounts of world building, so yeah, def a top 5 most contender <3
#4: The Infinitely Curious Woman by chararii (ao3) || literally ALL of their fics are absolute bangers, and while I forever mourn their decision to stop all Naruto fics thanks to the great harddrive incident of 2022, I have nonetheless the GREATEST respect to their skill & talent to bring SUCH LIFE to their stories. In particular, I chose this particular fic of theirs because the premise of Sakura making her own way by shedding off her morality the more she learned & got influenced by her 2 greatest teachers was absolutely nothing short of DIVINE. It was and IS such an inspiration to read, reread & explore, and I will forever love @chararii for this brilliant piece of a fic
#3: The Endgame that never was series by @heleneplays aka me (tumblr masterlist) || ok I know this seems self-absorbed but DEAR MOTHER OF CHRISTIE i literally WENT OFF for a whole ass day and a half going feral for the Relics of the Lost Age series book 3 finale (hi @jamesshawgames pls know im still here and STILL simping even tho i am currently having a brainrot for a different thing on main sjdhdkdk i hope ur doing well dearest mr. chief author sir!!!!) and created this series from my dreams + nonstop ben&ben playlist— and honestly, I think it's VERY sexy of me <3 bc I rarely like things that I do after a while, but THIS— alongside Universal Constant (ao3) are truly my BEST work <3
#2: Across the Stars by nomisunrider (ao3) || I CAN NEVER STRESS THIS ENOUGH, HOW MUCH THIS FIC ALTERED MY BRAIN CHEMISTRY LIKE. its been 4 YEARS since it was completed but HOLY. MOTHERFUCKING. GOD. The story between Michael & Philippa persisting beyond the odds, in a twist of the canon happenings in Star Trek: Discovery is FOREVER ingrained in my heart and soul and honestly once again THANK YOU @nomi--sunrider for SUCH a beautiful story 🥺🥺🥺
and drum roll please!!!
#1 (current): I literally cannot pick between Better than Gold + Little Cat by @lady-dimimi / @azu-zu (tumblr post for BtG | LC ao3); How to woo a Hot Principal by @softshrimpy (ao3); and Lipstick Stains by @weemssapphic (ao3) || LIKE HOLY SHIT THE FUCKING AMOUNT OF TALENT, PLOT, FLUFF, DRAMA AND UTTER GAYNESS THESE FICS BRING ME— its SOOOOO insanity inducing in the best of ways <3 also, i really count myself lucky to get into a very active (x reader) sphere LIKE ITS SOOOOO INSANE i get to consume CONTENT daily for such wonderful characters and these special morsels be like. authors, I am sending you all a MWAH from me
#meows at you meows at you#thank u for the ask lol im sorry it took literally HOURS i had to look thru my ao3 rec list to pick lmao#anyways MWAH#anon asks#answered asks#lee answers#fic recs#personal.txt#clown.txt#simp.txt
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Hello!! could I get shipped with someoen from Lockwood and co?
I’m 5’9 red hair to my shoulders in a wolf cut, im plus sized, I’m kinda geeky! A little bit weird. I’m outgoing, adventurous, and courageous! I enjoy the outdoors and fantasy sports and I collect things I find in nature!
I ship you with...
QUILL KIPPS
He's not as bad as Lockwood says he is and you know it. He's a respecter of ladies, chivalrous and he loves your geekiness. Like, LOVES it.
Does he see a plus sized woman? Hell nah. He sees a goddess who should be treated even better than one. He’ll show you off to everyone with pride, saying that he’s lucky that you chose him and you’re a diamond in the rough, and always wonders what he’ll do without you. Really though, what would he?
He’s also adventurous and courageous so whenever you’re on an endeavour he’s right behind you, helping you collect things and put them in a memory box so that years later, he’ll still remember the love you gave each other.
You’ll do weird things together, like try out food combinations that no one even dared to think of, and if you found that one tasted delicious, you two would share the recipe until it was the new craze. Sometimes it was.
You’d be so awed that he’s a supervisor at Fittes and the top agent, but when he loses his talent you’re the first to know and you just comfort him by not bringing it up because it’s his sensitive subject. You’re conscious of it and he loves your compassion.
Hope you enjoyed it,
Arty.
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*skids down the road to your inbox* HELLO WORMS!!! have you thought about Vyn's R Card [Leisure Time]? I would love to know how tf he got such a steep necked sweater. it's so out of the norm based on his outfits,,, how'd that get in his closet? what story does it hold?
ty and have a nice day!!!
yooooo hey remember when I made an ask game??? Yeah, turns out I got super sick and then had writer’s block! Anyway HI SAM IM GLAD YOURE HERE 🤍!! That’s a great choice for a card, and I was hoping someone chose that one! Here’s a thingy I wrote :)
Vyn Richter: “Leisure Time”
Hobbies, hobbies…
Vyn Richter was a multifaceted, multi-talented man. He could pick up nearly any skill with elegance and ease, whether it involved physical resilience, strategy and quick-thinking, or a unique taste in design.
Though, she had suggested I find a circle to share my hobbies with. It is not a necessity, certainly, but proving that my hobbies are more than needless tasks would make me appear more open.
He stood in front of a bulletin board in Hemingway Heights, perusing the many advertisements and posters. His personal goal this week was to find a group to participate in a hobby with. When his new colleague Rosa had asked about his personal interests a few days prior, Vyn found himself eager to tell about his experiences with polo, archery, music, and the like. They spoke for a while. She said he was an impressive individual.
Impressive. Vyn knew that he was gloating when he replayed their conversation in his head…up until she had asked with whom he shared his talents.
So now, as he stood, Vyn intended to do just that.
She certainly seems like a more sociable individual…this sort of community activity must be of great importance to her.
After moments of careful consideration, he took a picture of the contacts of one interesting group, gracefully tucked his phone in his pocket, and walked away.
—
A month later, Vyn sat with his legs crossed by the waterfront, holding a warm mug of tea and wearing the sweater that Ida had just finished.
“Oh, thank you so much for taking us out today, dear. The sweater looks lovely on you…it’d be a shame if you didn’t keep it.”
Vyn smiled gently to the old woman, insisting that he “mustn’t profit from her handiwork”, but she patted a wrinkled hand on his arm and laughed.
“So sweet! Oh, what a kind man we have…Vyn, I insist.”
Edith took a sip from her own tea. “And handsome too! I bet the waitress was jealous when she came out to see this dashing model with us crones!”
Vyn chuckled, and set his empty mug on the table before standing with his bag. “Well, I do admit that as much as I have enjoyed my time with you, I must be going. And Edith, thank you again for the cardstock. My colleague will be very pleased to see that we may begin scrapbooking our vacation travels. I will continue working on the sock pattern until our next meeting.”
“Of course, dearie! Cozy up with a book when you get around to wearing those—the merino is very soft. Or invite a friend to cozy up with you!” Edith had seemed to listen very intently whenever Vyn mentioned Rosa’s name, and in the moment he felt his features soften at the thought.
He said his final goodbyes to the women, paid the bill as they teased him for being a generous gentleman, and began the walk to the research center.
Vyn would never have expected that he could’ve found so much satisfaction in crafting with others. He had always prided himself in his independent nature, and when he returned to his workplace it dawned upon him that he hadn’t once tried to dissect their mannerisms during their meetings. Instead, he had focused on his own. Their chats gave him a genuine sense of comfort—not only in proving to Rosa that he was capable of sharing his hobbies, but that there were elders who cared for him enough to tease him, or send food when he’s sick, or suggest he adopt a cat. Hell, even as he sat there at his desk Vyn looked down to see the sweater that had been lovingly made for him.
Vyn made a mental note to thank Rosa for her suggestion, and pulled his white coat over the sweater while he tucked his bag of scrapbooking materials to the side. It was a productive day for leisure time, without a doubt.
ty again for the ask! I’m so sorry it’s been so long since I’ve appeared…living is wonky and my brain didn’t Want To but oh well! it may take a long while until I’m done with all of them, but I’m just reminding myself that this is a hobby and I shouldn’t be under any obligation to post lol,,, social media is weird. but I genuinely like everybody sitting in my inbox! Thanks for the patience <333
#tears of themis#vyn richter#tot vyn#tears of themis vyn#wormy fiction#ask game#asks#this was fun! unfortunately I have a million more to do hahhhfhskfhm ;) ow#reserving the right rn to edit this at any time cuz who knows when lo find mistakes hehe#I <3 U ALL & thanks for stopping by sam!
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LET ME PREFACE THIS i know i am a woman of great intelligence and talent and i may be beyond this but i honestly doubt that because i am only human so here it goes i swear to God im gonna go batshit insane if i dont have him inside me one day and if I die without fucking him i will count my life as a WASTE of TIME if i never taste that cock do you hear me like im being so serious
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I know there's already one of these going around but I really think we can make this into a positive thing so- here are some Black artists I like and what they specialize in!💗
well i have a really specific taste- SHHH say no more! check these artist out!
"I prefer Experamental progressive rock something hard to pin down like Dead Man's Poison,"
Then Check out Jhariah!
"um nah im more of a pop fan i want, maybe something Saphic?"
Pspspsps come check out Nxdia!
"I prefer hardcore pop and Nu-metal. i need some real woman empowerment rn"
oh? have you heard of TeZaTalks?
"This is all nice but I prefer something smoother what about some folk or Soul? "
Heres a little treat- go check out Lianne La Havas!
"RB&B??? Soul? Keep talking "
No problem. try a little Nai Br. XX!
"im a big Bruno mars fan. u got anything for that?"
It would actually be Insane if you hadn't seen them already but just in case- here's GRAMMY award winner THUNDERCAT!
"Sorry uhh.. i only listen to Jpop tbh I don't think this is for me ?"
WRONG! go check out the beutiful and talented Japanese/black artist Crystal Kay!
Im going to add more as the day goes! Feel free to add any you want as well! please leave a like if any of these songs stuck out to you!💖
#music#black artist#widen your horizons#Spotify#if your also looking for good rap to start on let me know! i have a playlist for that too!
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Heyyyy do u have any wlw/GL film recs it can be dramas movies anything at this point im so desperate 😭
Hello!!!! Thanks for the ask! I love the topic haha. I'm going to give you 8 recs, I hope you like them!
(synopses taken from imdb)
The Handmaiden / 아가씨 (2016)
A woman is hired as a handmaiden to a Japanese heiress, but secretly she is involved in a plot to defraud her
I don't think I've watched this movie since it came out, so my memory is a little fuzzy. I remember thinking it was brilliant and entertaining; I found the plot and characters to be compelling and I was really rooting for Lady Hideko to get a happy ending. The cinematography is so delicious, as is the romantic tension between the lead female characters. However, I did find the sex scenes to be a little... not to my taste but my opinion might have changed in the last few years
Colette (2018)
Colette is pushed by her husband to write novels under his name. Upon their success, she fights to make her talents known, challenging gender norms
A Historical biopic about the life of Sidonie-Gabrielle Colette. It's another movie I haven't seen since it came out but I also enjoyed it. Although married to a man (who is also a dickhead), Colette has relationships with women, most notably, Missy, who is male presenting. (I don't remember if Missy's gender is ever defined in the movie, so I'm not sure if "women" is the correct term to use when describing them. I might be misgendering them as the real-life Missy, Mathilde de Morny, did go by Max/Uncle Max in their later years.)
The Favourite (2018)
In early 18th-century England, the status quo at the court is upset when a new servant arrives and endears herself to a frail Queen Anne
Here we have another biopic, this time it's about the relationship between Queen Anne, Sarah Churchill, and Abigail Masham. I adore this movie! It's soooo fantastic to see queer women be so ruthless, cunning, terrible and desperate. Gosh, I love how love and ambition are depicted throughout. It's fantastic! All three female leads are excellent.
Atomic Blonde (2017)
An undercover MI6 agent is sent to Berlin during the Cold War to investigate the murder of a fellow agent and recover a missing list of double agents
Charlize Theron plays a bisexual baddie in a spy action movie where she is hunted down by James McAvoy?? Yes please and thank you!
Shiva Baby (2020)
At a Jewish funeral service with her parents, a college student runs into her sugar daddy and ex-girlfriend
This is one of my favourite movies. It is a horror dressed up as a comedy. THE INTENSITY is sooo unreal that it inspired me to write an original story! I love everything about it! Plus, YES to bisexual and sex-work representation!
Bend it like Beckham (2002)
Two ambitious girls, despite their parents' wishes, have their hearts set on careers in professional soccer
Yes, the main character ends up with the male love interest. But this movie is still soooo queer! Jess and Jules are gay for one another, I don't make the rules! Kiera Knightley wanted them to be together and so did everyone else. If they ever made a sequel (which they should), it could be about them reuniting and getting together. I watched this movie soooooo many times growing up.... lol
Calamity Jane (1953)
The story of Calamity Jane, her saloon, and her romance with Wild Bill Hickok
Another biopic but this time, it's a musical haha. Okay, yes, Jane ends up with a man and yes, the real Calamity Jane was married twice in her life to men. But when I watched this as a child, it awaken something in me. The movie is so queer-coded, I could see it even as a little child who didn't know what queer was yet. I haven't seen it in over a decade, maybe more, but it left a huge impression on me. Plus, The Windy City and A Woman's Touch are absolutely certified jams. (side note: when I watched A Woman's Touch for the first time, I remember thinking that I wouldn't mind living in a cabin with my best "gal friend" 😂)
Now for a TV show I watched growing up (when I was WAY too young to be watching something so adult) that made me feel the feels:
Sugar Rush (2005)
15-year-old Kim has just moved to Brighton and developed an earth-shattering, hormone-surging crush on her new best friend, Sugar
Coming-of-age/ sexual awakening stories aren't always my thing anymore, as I don't care to watch teenagers exploring their sexuality but I watched this when I was 10(??), and it was very important to me. It's not a very good show and is probably considered to be super outdated now, but I found it formative. Plus, when I was growing up, there weren't any (not from what I can remember) shows or movies with a lesbian lead wanting to be in an interracial relationship with her best friend. It's an important part of queer TV history. Plus, it has Andrew Garfield playing one of the wettest male characters ever lol
Thanks again and I hope you like my recommendations! 😊
#ask answered#wlw recommendations#you can tell i grew up in the 00's in the UK lol#yeah some of these are more subtext/queer-coded than text but they were important to me#also what can i say? i like a biopic haha#thank you <3
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just a friend... they told me that i was sounding uninterested or mad in them when they were doing the same thing. they kept shutting me down and i just. i was being nice and apologizing and i even thanked them for criticizing the way i was talking
anyhow, i don't remember what its called, but ill definitely try to look it up! it was at our library a few years ago. okay, dont judge, but if im honest, i love artemis but i also have something against minorly against her. ummm i also dislike poseidon and zeus somewhat. those two are womanizers and i hate how poseidon abandoned poor medusa
ummm arghhh i keep forgetting what's next. i... puppets, right? i think so. well i do really like them, and dolls for the same reason! i absolutely adore dolls, and. kind of see myself as one, if that makes sense? i dont know T.T
IM ALSO SO HAPPY YOURE HAPPY TO SEE ME TOO!!
sunflowers are absolutely lovely! the squirrels and birds kept planting them because of our old bird feeder, which was fun. random sunflowers among our lovely front yard garden. oh! also i love weed flowers! like dandelions and such, they're so good for bees and i... love bees. plus they make our yard so so beautiful. and i reallllyyyy love nature so so much, i get very excited about it. i love animals and plants to death
and im not thaaaat talented, though id love to show you things ive made before!! and id love to play piano or specifically the cello,, or guitar maybe! do you do anything artistic? even just for fun! sometimes it's better like that, even
-🎭
i’m so sorry, sweetheart. would you like a hug? communication is hard, and i think you did really well with taking the criticism despite the way they kept shutting you down. im very very proud of you for keeping your cool and being calm about it. that must’ve been super tough, honey, i’m sorry.
yes, i’ve always fucking hated that side of zeus. i also hated what poseidon did to medusa. what do you have against artemis?
if you don’t mind me asking, why do you see yourself as a doll?
AAAAAAA SHAKES YOU. IM HAPPY THAT YOURE HAPPY THAT IM HAPPY TO SEE YOU TOO!!!
STOP THATS SO COOL!!! YOU HAVE A BIRD FEEDER?? i love that you’re so passionate about this. it’s very very refreshing to see!! i think “weed” flowers are very pretty too. i must say you have good taste, my dear. do you enjoy spending your time outdoors?
i think you’re incredibly talented!! and whatever you’d feel most comfortable sharing, i would love to see. i don’t even have to post it if you don’t want to. i can just comment it on a post with your tag if you’d like. also!!! piano is so cool!! and the cello!! you should totally go for it!!
as for myself, i write (and don’t clown me for this) fanfiction on a separate account. i also write poetry and im decent with acoustic guitar. im not very skilled with barred chords and switching frets fast enough— though, it has been over a year since ive played. i sing a little bit, but i don’t think im very good 💀 i have a very small range. i paint every so often too!
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i see people doing this so im going to do it
uhm can you tag your mutuals and say what kind of person they are? i wanna get to know people but i want to know if they are good you know?
hii sorry i didn't get around to this earlier!! I was kinda busy but ofc!! :)
@kurapikaskinkychains; Rain ! ; They were the first ever person I've interacted w on Tumblr, they're vvvv nice & sweet!! they do amazing fics & drabbles n stuff, they do really good stories and scenarios!! (please check them out! They're vv talented) <33
@mitsuris-big-boobies Mosmei / Moony ! ; omg where do I even start, SHES SO SWEET & AMAZING!! I literally love her sm & we talk every day!! She's so funny istg and I literally roll on the floor at her jokes it's so funny I'm not kidding, not t mention, SHE'S SO PRETTY!! LIKE I MEAN IT, SHE'S SO PRETTY 😻😻 PB doesn't deserve her, I do 😡. We play a bit of Roblox together and overall, time w her is super fun!! she literally brightens my day sm and she probably doesn't even know how much but it's so much like I smile whenever she's happy :). She deserves a big ol' break, hugs n kisses !! Love you so, so much moonyyyy <333 xoxo
@satisfactooru Bay ! ; omg she is the literal BEST!! Her energy is so bubbly and we're both fangirling over hq boys n girls, fics are chef's kiss & hair pulling tasty and she's absolutely the best to talk to and supports anything that you'd do & overall, she's the best friend everyone can count on, & she'll always be there for you. Oikawa & I are super lucky to have her. She's the cutest n I love her so. (Her fics are so 😩😩, check her blog out!) Love you, Bay <33 xoxo
@sookisaurus Kurisu ! ; GIRL OMG!! This girl is absolutely stunning!! (did yous see her braids?!?! 😻😻) And when I tell you that her fics are literally so tasty I could lick my screen, I'm always excited to talk to her about anything on my mind!! Whether it's hq boys or anything really!! She makes my heart jumble 😍 (SBNHEW the fics she makes it delish, so please check her blog out!) Love you, Kurisu <33 xoxo
@sailewhoremoon Sosa ! ; SOSA BBY!! Gosh, I literally love her w all my heart 😩 She's the funniest person to talk to!! she has the best taste in men n women its actually ridiculous, she has excellent taste in animes too!! God, that woman 😩 Love you, Sosa <3 xoxo
@nanamoonie Aims ! ; We've only been moots for like a few weeks and it feels like we've been moots forever :( n I already love her 😻😻 SHES JUST SO SWEET AND EVERYTHING :(( she deserves the world frfr. I'm Tanaka n she's my Kiyoko 🫣 I hope she gets some rest like she deserves, she's really hardworking too !! (@kuroosdarling is her writing blog, so please check that out too!! ) Love you, Aims <33 xoxo
@solaneaa Moneaa ; OMGGGGG !! EEK love her smsmsm frr. She's so fun to talk to!! Vvv funny and has a sense of style !! She's creative and kind, and overall vv outstanding !! Love you Moneaa !! <3
@oh-ohagi Dei ; I'm giving her a big smooch on the cheek rn!! Love. her. sooooooo. much!! She's funny and so cute w everything that she does !! She writes, but I think is on break for her exams !! Hopefully, she will return so we can all chat with her again !! Love you, Dei <33 xoxo
@pure-dumbass-tm Natalia ; Ugh she's so nice! Her music taste is just 😻😻 n I love everything about her !! Her life is hard, and she deserves a break :(( hope she gets soo much rest and keeps hydrated !! Love you, Tal !! <3 xoxo
@frxxst Hannah ; Eeek! her roleplays w me n people are so 🥹 love her sm!! HER KENMA BLOG THO 🫣🫣 But she's very kind and bubbly!! it's really fun to talk to her every time she goes into my inbox and when I go into hers. She's just a really lovely person and vv nice !! I recommend being friends with her, she's amazing :) Love you, Hannah, <3
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☕️ im here for YOUR unpopular music opinions bab xx right my wrongs xx
im genuinely a bit terrified because many of my music tastes and opinions are deemed lame and basic but lame girl is my alias and profession so i will commit to it.
before we start let me assessment the level of my lameness - i have a twenty one pilots and a taylor swift tattoo. see? this is what we are working with
whatever
- lyrics are much more important to me than music i do love beautiful melodies and production of course but if the lyrics slap i will probably not give a fuck about anything else
- the best way to listen to music is by going through albums from start to finish. shuffle is evil and my sworn enemy
- phoebe bridgers is in fact one of our greatest songwriters right now. yes, along with mitski. im sorry ridi. they explore different themes and i feel like our connection to said themes is what makes us love one or the other more. and well. it's phoebe for me. i feel like punisher changed the course of my existence that winter night in my small god awful apartment where I listened to it while for the first time while cutting my hair with paper scissors.
- same with taylor. there's much to say about her as a political figure (of sorts), as a businesswoman, as an artist too, and not all of it will be pretty. but she's a strong, strong writer who is constantly overlooked by many outside of her (very annoying and over the top, yes) fanbase (that i have beef with but. that's another story).
one of the most consistent criticisms of her as a songwriter though is that there's too much of her, so much she feels inescapable. and that is a classic case of being woman'd (term courtesy of rayne fisher-quann - we as a society and as consumers are compelled to want to take any woman that gets too successful down a notch. she has always been annoying. there's too much of her. overrated. and so on. rayne's essay was rather eye opening and i can't recommend it enough). but that is a co-product of misogyny, people of marginalized groups (fairly) recognising her privileges and being (fairly) upset by the lack of opportunities for equally talented artists, her enormous fanbase and the pit of despair that is modern stan culture.
- on the topic of stan culture. oh brothers what makes people so mean? for the life of me i can not figure out what good it does you to write "flop" under popcrave tweets. do people feel righteous? cathartic? edgy? is this for the sake of ruling up some and getting throwaway validation from the others? can not wrap my head around this.
- in the same vein. we have GOT to stop demanding content from any kind of artists, musicians included. i think everyone here agrees but i needed to say that because i can not bear seeing this attitude on twitter anymore
- oh those were some thinkpieces babes. well i wasn't an academic for 6 years for nothing
- flash round! melodrama best album ever made; jack antonoff the lows are low but the highs are really fucking high have you heard choreomania and hard feelings/loveless; bo burnham amazing lyricist im not even fucking sorry about this one though i got bullied on tiktok for it; we deserve an emo renaissance. i think that's it for today that was really something
#heyyyyy#hope you still like me hope my lame vibe and defensive libra demeanor compels you#sorry grils unfortunately im a lover and not a hater until absolutely cornered#ridi dearest
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