I think I have just put less and less effort into my art over time bc genuinely I don't think it even matters when it comes to how well a piece is recieved 💀 bc yeah I could spend 18 hours making a finished piece.. or I could just draw up a shitty pandering sketch and it will get twice the likes

someone: shame that [beloved childhood movie] didn’t have a sequel

me: *hits them with a stick hits them with a stick hits them with a stick hits-*

okay I am obsessed with both '09 and '22 soapghost, but what has recently consumed my brain is the headcanon that they're one and the same.

After they get together, Soap is promoted to Captain and their dynamic immediately shifts. He thinks Ghost has an issue with him being his superior. He's been quiet, more so than usual, almost appearing small at times. He loves being captain but goes so far as to consider stepping down for the sake of his love... when he finds out it's quite the opposite.

Ghost fucking loves Johnny being his superior. He loves being bossed around and told what to do. Price trusted him to be left to his own devices when on missions, but Mactavish will always have an eye on him, always making sure he wasn't being reckless. Always has him following the rules. Calling him a good boy when he listens. Simon is addicted.

He feels some sort of shame, a weakness, knowing that he enjoys not taking charge. But as soon as Mactavish catches on, he's hugging ghost, kissing all over his balaclava and telling him how happy it makes him. How special he feels knowing Simon could let his guard down, give away his control to Johnny.

In the end it makes their relationship stronger. After a long while of Simon giving his everything to Johnny, he finally lets himself be selfish, take some of his wants in return. And Johnny is more than happy to give it to him.

As a lesbian I still find joy in m/m content because holy shit the way men who love men express it is as equally as beautiful as the way women who love women express it. They produce some great art too.

the difference between tomgreg and tomshiv is that if tom would bite greg but greg would never bite tom back. and shiv would bite tom and wants tom to bite her back. and that is why tomshiv reigns supreme. tomgreg is just tomshiv's shadow.

many thoughts

realizing what specifically i disliked abt last life and how its perfectly done in limited life for me

i liked the boogey system, it was very very fun and its an interesting lore bit how each session no matter how careful no matter how kind they become, some lives would get deleted, be it to a boogey kill or refusing the boogey

but what i disliked was 2 things, first the rule that green and reds cant team up, didnt really liked how not much Close close relationships formed in that season, and the other thing was the life share mechanic, it made going red doesnt feel like Going Red, yk?? like when someone got to red youre not panicking bc well. they can get a heart from someone! no worries, which (esp bc at that time we only had 3L to compare it to) really diminished the Scary Worry of going red, like jimmy scar ren etc

BUT! limited life doesnt have either of those stuff, And it has the boogey system!!! and yk, i used to think maybe the boogey mechanic wasnt For Me but nope im really enjoying it in LimLife lmao, also i mean, LimLife has wayyy chiller fun team up vibes (kinda following the fluffy DL vibes) and im having fun :)

She was just spamming /blowkiss on Llymlaen.

this line in the lokasenna makes me so miserable for no reason. guys i swear to god i'll be having a nice day and then i'll remember that blood siblings are more important that biological siblings, how they're supposed to share both achievements and punishments and drink together and how loki said this to his brother-- the guy who imprisoned his children and later tortured him-- and i'll break down and cry for 4 hours (i know the poem is satire. i just like to be miserable)

every transphobic or fearmongering argument about bottom surgery that might otherwise make me nervous fades away so easily lately 'cause every time i think about my surgery for more than a second i get so excited i start bouncing. i think that's a pretty good sign that i'm sure

I wonder if I left that server anyone would notice

yk, idk how true it is that tumblr is/will be using all art and media posted here to train ai but judging from the fact literally every huge corporation is doing is is enough for me to believe its true

and im starting to get so fucking exhausted by the reality of the situation. i literally cannot go anywhere without having an awful algorythm to try and play out, or seeing awful and hateful content/people on the platform, or the site using my content without consent in training ai or any other bullshit. at first i tried protesting by stopping using sites and apps (which is why i migrated off of twitter half a year ago), but its starting to get really fucking tiring.

im literally only on 3-4 sites in total actively posting on. here on tumblr, on instagram, and on mastodon. literally nowhere else. and these platforms have their own problems that *should* drive me away based on what i do and what i believe in, but im just done at this point. you cannot go anywhere anymore without running into bullshit like this, where the techbros are killing off originality and creativity from anything they touch. and its incredibly discouraging and depressing.

ive been struggling with depression and having horrible, self destructive and intrusive thought ever since the push for ai has picked up (right after the hellfire that nfts were), and i dont know how much longer i can actively protest against it. ill always passively protest and stand up against it, but its tiring to migrate from site to site every year or so

Brazilian mixed confession time

It was kinda hard to me to learn that I am perceived as white (in my country) bc I always had a complexion with my skin color

I always thought that if I wanted to look like my favorite characters I needed to make my skin lighter somehow and that used to make me insecure (I was 10 yk) bc I couldn't be like the pretty girls on the tv (I wanted to look like Maisa T-T )

And like, my skin is not that dark??? It's like a light brown yk like when you mix coffee and milk? I'm just permanently tanned bc I was raised on the beach and pa gave me the melanin

And once a teacher said I was never going to be white with the nose I had and GUESS WHAT COLOR THEY ASSIGN ME AT THE DOCTOR BITCH

Anyway fuck that teacher the way they said was mean af (she was literally laughing at me)

And that's what happens when you are mixed yay (besides all that I kinda won the genetic lottery bc I got the best features from my parents (also what confused me a lot, pa is a black man and people say I look just like him so ??????? Tf man))

Normalize being uncontactable

beep

Whenever I find an opportunity to add an en dash – like this – in the middle of a sentence, I feel like such a genius.

go language girl go, you go and punctuate stuff aw yeah

a soft, hesitant Fuck You to my therapist for never mentioning that she fuckin diagnosed me with ptsd until several months later?????????????????????