#I'm trying real hard to be the shepard
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"What's this?" Alejandro demanded.
You were confused seeing Graves and the Shadow Company people surrounding the gate to you and Alejandro's base. You took notice of the Shadow people surrounding you and your colleagues. It brought a chill down your spine and you immediately got a bad feeling in your gut. Something was not right.
"This is the immediate future, step away from the gate." Graves announced.
What? You couldn't believe what you were hearing.
"What?" You cried out in disbelief.
"You heard me." Graves snared at you.
Your blood boiled with anger. You never heard such disrespect from someone, let alone someone who isn't even on your team.
"You're crazy, this is my base." Alejandro said.
You stood close to your boss, to hide the fact that you were gripping the small pistol you had in your back pocket. This could get ugly real quick but you would do it in a heartbeat to not only protect your Colonel but Task Force 141 that you have grown fond and close with.
"It's not a base," Graves started which only made you want to pop his head even more, "this is a sizable covert facility and I admire it. So I'm taking it."
No. No, he can't do that. There's no way he can do that. This was our base, our facility, our everything. Our home, you frantically thought. Your heart raced even faster than it did.
"You boys and gal," Graves made a point to smirk at you as he said that, "thank you for your service."
"No, no, no I don't take orders from you." Alejandro said.
You could feel that your Colonel was trying to keep himself cool and collected as he should be, but it was getting hard to do so.
"Didn't Valeria say that?"
He did not. You started to pull out your gun but felt a strong hand push down on your hand as Graves kept talking. You turned to see who it was and it was Sergeant Soap. His blue eyes pierced at you, and he shook his head at you. He knew what you were thinking and you felt as though he wanted to do the same thing as you did, but he knew it would turn real ugly. You sighed, removing your hand from your gun.
"What the fuck did you just say to me, pendejo?" Alejandro growled, stepping forward towards Graves.
You immediately pressed your hand onto the Colonel's chest, preventing him from doing any damage, Soap's small action towards you getting through to you. Alejandro looked down at your hand on his chest, knowing immediately it was your hand, but kept his scowl on Graves.
"You're out of line, Graves." Soap sternly said, approaching Graves as well.
"Don't do that. Don't.." Graves paused to glare at the three of you, "do that. No needs to get hurt here."
There was a small, intense pause with silence between all of you with the hard rain pattering on the road to accompany the silence.
"Are you threatening us?" Ghost's voice came from the corner.
The Ghost. Just from what you have seen in the short time y'all have done missions together, you knew he was a great fighter and solider. His alias name was very true to it's name.
"Soilder, I don't make threats."
Yeah right. You felt Alejandro shift his footing, causing your hand to fall from his chest. Same with Soap, realizing that it was taking two people to stop your Colonel from plummeting Graves.
"I make guarantees. So let's not do this." Graves eyed everyone, feeling the tension in the air get thicker.
"I'm calling Shepard." Soap announced.
Yes, their boss. Do it Soap.
"General Shepard sends his regards."
What?
"He told me y'all wouldn't take this well."
I couldn't believe it.
"He knows about this?" Ghost frantically asked, who visibly had the same reaction as you did or what you could tell from his mask.
"He has put me in command of this operation from here on out. So y'all need to stand down and it's time to let the pros finish this." Graves announced.
Chills rapidly went down your body. You were scared for once in your life. You didn't know what was going to happen. You stood closer to your Colonel who then pushed you back.
"Cam, stay back." Alejandro whispered and called you by your call sign so quietly that you could barely hear.
You had a feeling that your Colonel knew what was going to happen.
"Why the hell are we talking like this is some kind of negotiation? It's not. I've got my orders, and you have yours." Graves finished, adding fuel to the fire.
"And who the fuck do you think you are, cabrón?" Alejandro snared with rage, "my men are inside!"
"I'm afraid not."
Fuck.
"Your men have been...detained."
Oh my god. Oh shit. He is going to pounce. You just knew it. And he did. Before you could even jump in, you were pushed down onto your back, taking notice of Graves zip tieing his hands together.
"Colonel!" You cry out as shots were staring to fire.
You try to crawl over to help him, but a Shadow kicked you upside your head, causing your vision to blur. Shots were being fired, everyone was shouting, but the only person on your mind was your Colonel, Alejandro. Just as you were about to reach him, Graves took the butt of his gun and hit him up against his head with it, knocking Alejandro out.
"NO! Tu jodes!" You screamed, attempting to tackle Graves.
You managed to scratch his face until he kicked you down, hitting your head against the hard road. His gun was pointed at you and you felt your heart race as if you knew this was the end. At least you didn't go down without a fight.
Suddenly a gunshot rang out, hitting Graves right on his shoulder and knocking him back.
"Cam, let's go!" A deep accented voice called to you.
It was Soap and Ghost. You immediately took Soap's hand as he helped you to his feet. The two of you took off running, with Ghost trailing behind y'all. Soap tried to prevent you from looking back but you couldn't help yourself as you had seen your beloved Colonel get shoved into the G-Wagon. Before he was even fully into the vehicle, the three of you were gone from sight, disappearing into the deep woods of Las Almas. Once the three of you were far from Graves and the Shadow Company, the three of y'all stopped to recollect.
"Fuck! Alejandro." You croaked, coming to terms with what happened.
"We will get him back, Cam." Soap tried to comfort you.
And while you appreciate it, your mind was racing so much to even realize he was trying to pull you into a hug.
"Mierda.." You mumble, feeling the tears peak out of your eyes.
You truly felt defeated. You embraced Soap's hug, knowing he was trying to keep you calm.
"Alejandro is a tough guy. He will be okay." Ghost piped up.
"I know. It's just.." You paused, wondering if you should tell the two Brits.
Both Soap and Ghost were silent and looking at you, waiting for you to finish.
"Well, Alejandro and I.. we are seeing each other."
Soap's eyes went wide while Ghost remained neutral.
"I had no idea. You both hide it well." Soap complimented.
"You two act like no one can see the two of 'ou holding hands in the vehicle, but everyone knows." Ghost remarked.
You roll your eyes at him.
"Thanks, man." You say, "we need to make it to Alejandro's safe house. There's equipment there and everything we need to fight back."
"How do we get there?" Ghost asked.
"I know the way." You say.
"Well, lead the way Mrs. Vargas." Soap said.
You couldn't help but chuckle at that, knowing Soap meant good intentions behind it. As you led the men to Alejandro's safe house, you just hope they can manage to keep it a secret, like Rudy has, until you both retire.
END
A/N: A little drabble I came up with! I hope y'all enjoyed it.
#cod#callofduty#simon ghost riley#call of duty#cod modern warfare#ghostofthemost141#cod x reader#modern warfare x reader#alejandro vargas x reader#alejandro vargas#cod alejandro#cod alejandro vargas#phillip graves#johnny soap mactavish#john soap mactavish#john mactavish#soap cod
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Hi I'm procrastinating my lab report so I'm back with an ask/headcannon:
I hc Curly as neurodivergent AuDHD and savant level good with math, so Ponyboy will be diligently working through problems from his textbook or trying to do mental math for something and Curly just does it and it pisses Ponyboy off soooo much but when he tries to complain to Soda about it he's just like 'you realize that's how I feel when you talk about your schoolwork right' and ponyboy is like ohhhhhhhh
(the savant thing is also why Tim let Curly do gang stuff so young because he could very easily calculate what drugs were worth what and if anyone was trying to skim money)
So anyway...thoughts?
I ACTUALLY HC THE SAME THING A LIL BIT??? to me all the shepards r just undiagnosed autistic ppl, partially bc theyre poor, but mostly bc theyre black, getting a diagnoses would b hard for them
AND TO ME THEYRE JUST ALL GOOD AT MATH literal human calculators
but to slip in some purly here, curly would just do ponys math problems bc he wants to get closer to pony and spend time w him and thinks hes helping and being useful, but pony actually wants to practice it on his own bc hes not the best at math and curly just doesnt get it he does mean very well tho
also i do hc soda as having adhd and on the spectrum but not autistic, so yea i think him being able to relate to curly matches here too lol
ur so real for this
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jack x miranda
NOTE: this is just my opinion :) giga word doc incoming
Jack and Miranda is honestly my favorite non Shepard ship, I've always been a big fan of both of them and seeing them grow through the series is honestly one of the more interesting aspects of the game, not just for them but most of the characters on general. Jack goes from just a generally hateful person to genuinely caring individual no matter how hard she tries to act otherwise. Miranda obviously goes from being a blind follower of Cerberus for the purpose of recognition to finding her own path and purpose in life. I love seeing them interact after the fact in the Citadel dlc, where you can tell they try to keep that sense of normalcy as best they can so it's not awkward through their empty insults and banter, but i genuinely think they were happy to see they one another was alive. But still i kinda wanna break down their whole dynamic because they deserve it, and i'm bored, nothing else. I think they're an underrated ship with more evidence?? than people think. I don't like to say evidence necessarily because nuance is a thing, and i think their relationship in general was supposed to be something you read between the lines not entirely blatant.
So to start as soon as we start Jack's recruitment mission we hear about how mean and hatful she is, and get shown that as we play through it looking for her. She's clearly extremally powerful and portrayed as being kinda unhinged, not just in her actions but she tells us herself how bad of a person she is overall. However, as you spend time with her you see that's just not true, at least to the extent that she claims or is initially portrayed. She's scared, she's tortured. As a child and now as an adult in her head. She can't mentally escape Pagia, and it makes her lash out. She can't trust people, or maybe she doesn't even want to. She doesn't want to let people in. Jack is clearly a very emotional person, all of her noteworthy scenes in ME2 come from emotional outbursts. She's hurting and you can tell the most in her poetry that she writes and can read in the SB dlc. All of that is to say, Jack and Miranda don't hate each other. They hate themselves. I'll get to Miranda in a minute, but Jack and Miranda have no real reason to beef with each other initially, neither has ever done anything directly to the other, except they're famous fight after Jack's loyalty mission. The thing is Jack has a thing for just saying mean shit, she speaks before she thinks, just like when you're talking to her and trying to get to know her as a person. Jack calls Shep "Cerberus lapdog and a military stooge" even though she has no real way of knowing that. Depending on how you play Shepard that could even be the exact opposite, BUT she feels threatened. Shepard cares. At least enough to talk to her and get to know her, so she gets defensive and says the meanest things she can think of just to get a rise of of Shepard. She's not mean because she's actually a hateful person, but more as a defense mechanism to keep people away.
I'll come back to this! I wanna talk about Miranda now. Miranda desperately needs approval, it radiates off her. From the second we meet and are actually able to talk to her she's noticeably jealous of Shepard even if she denies it, you can tell she isn't happy about how much trust and importance has already been placed on Shepard over her (a loyal and dedicated Cerberus agent). and this isn't the only time either, later when you talk to her she says she doesn't get it. Why Shepard is great and she isn't. For renegade Shep she even brings up their lack of family and education, lamenting over how much better they are than her. She's has extreme self worth issues, something she can't get past to the point of bringing up how Shep is great even though they were poor and lived on the streets and whatever. She says those things and continues to talk about her dad and how she was supposed to be. Miranda doesn't see how that might upset Shepard because it's technically true, it's not meant as an insult, but just a statement. She just sees it as i was "born" better so i should have been. She's extremally tone deaf all of ME2. Just like how the illusive man, didn't know about the Cerberus facility Jack was at. That being said, i do think at that moment it was definitely something she said to upset her, because she's just being petty, but the point is her and Jack don't get along initially because they're extremally similar and they both know it.
When Jack comes abord, the first person she talks to is Miranda, she mentions that she'll go out of her way to read all of Miranda's files. For what though? They know nothing about each other, all she knows is Miranda works for Cerberus, but so does the whole damn ship. She doesn't mention anything to Jacob or anyone else ever, just Miranda directly and the general Cerberus umbrella. (or at least i don't remember if she does so if that's not true just ignore that bit i'm going off memory) Anyway when it comes to Miranda, I don't think she even hates Jack at all, just her being so disruptive, she doesn't think she belongs there. Jack was in prison and in her mind that's probably where she thought she belonged, and she wasn't gonna change her mind about it either. In her mind Cerberus didn't know about Pragia so why is it there fault. Miranda is kinda dumb to think that way but she's blindly loyal to them and taking any chance she can to defend them because it's the only place she's found that she belongs. They're both angry but honestly it's just not at each other. They're both so stuck in their heads with their beliefs because they're insecure and cling to the only things they can to cope. In ME2 they're both still the insecure scared kids they were growing up and they found each other, and i think it scared them both. Being so different, but so similar at the same time. Jack thinks Miranda is so preppy and above everyone else, but maybe she reads her files and realizes it's the opposite. That she craves recognition, that she genuinely works hard for everything she has. That Miranda understands maybe more than anyone what she went through. Neither were enough, neither could live up to the impossible expectations given to them, and both decided to break away from that to find their own way, and are still haunted by their pasts as of ME2.
By the time ME3 comes around both have grown. Like a lot. You see the real Jack, she's still abrasive, maybe more out of habit than anything but she's a caring and honestly warm person now. She's responsible and loving towards the kids she looks after and they all look up to her, she's finally found somewhere she belongs. She seems genuinely happy even with the reaper war going on, she seems like the happiest person we talk to the whole came, she's laughingly and looking forward to the future, instead of the day someone will betray her. She has such a genuinely good 180 from who she was after realizing there were good people, there are people that care, that WANT her to be around. They don't just use her and throw her off to the side afterwards.
As for Miranda she's calmed down and loosed up a lot, she sees that her own self worth is more important than anyone else's recognition and is able to find her own path for one, she decides to do good after realizing what Cerberus truly is and is actively working the whole game to deter Cerberus and turn people away from sanctuary later on.
They are both completely different people, and that's why in the citadel dlc, they're just sharing drinks and genuinely enjoying each others company. I don't think Shepard mentions them getting together for no reason, i think they were meant to find each other from the beginning. This is more speculative than anything, and i'm not taking into account Shepard romances with either, so if you disagree and think they're just friends that's okay! This is just how i interoperated them. I think they do like each other and maybe to some extent have for a while, and just refused to acknowledge it to themselves or each other. They're polar opposites at first glance, Jack is covered in tattoos, reclusive, aggressive, and rude. Whereas Miranda is "perfect", no marks or blemishes and well put together, extraverted, generally tries to act like she's polite, and wants to take leadership roles. But on the inside they're the same, both just want to find their places in the galaxy, both want desperately to belong somewhere. Jack found her place, maybe Miranda will find her place too, and maybe it's by Jack's side. Helping the biotic kids and working with the alliance. Maybe she can finally do what she thought she was doing in Cerberus and help humanity the most by rebuilding and proving her knowledge to other people.
They're both genuinely caring and loving people at heart, their war crimes aside. (sadge) I think Miranda ending up with Jack honestly makes sense considering everything, it'd even help with her wanting kids and all since she can't have any naturally. Her and Jack could happily teach the biotic kids together after all is said and done.
That's all for now, thank you for coming to my tedtalk and reading my rant if you got this far :)
I may add more later if i think of anything!
#miranda lawson#subject zero#jack x miranda#mass effect#mass effect 2#mass effect 3#just ranting#character study#sorta..#i have so many thoughts about them like little worms in my head#please talk with me about this i'm so obsessed i need to discuss ;w;#jackanda
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FEBUWHUMP DAY 7 - Suffering in silence
CW: emotional manipulation, parental Whumper, hypnosis, conditioning, mind control, interrogation, forced betrayal
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・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・
Shepard cradled his son protectively, hoping to increase this state of suggestibility to a usable scale, despite or especially because the walls Reuben had built up were nothing more than gravel on the road.
"Listen carefully now. I'm not trying to fool you again, I'm just worried about my children. That's why I need to know if Lukas is alright, you understand this better than anyone. You remember what always happens when the stress gets to him: he doesn't eat, just lays in bed until sunset and doesn't go outside for fresh air. We don't want that, do we?"
His youngest nodded his assent. Luke, in one of his moods, couldn't cope on his own and he was all alone now too, but Ben was here and ready to support him from afar.
"You always help me out, that's your special talent. And I wouldn't dare to ask you bluntly, I bet Lukas told you that awful things would happen if you reveal details about his new...current home to me."
Ben agreed again, he was thoroughly briefed to hold his peace. Luke's horror stories about how they both would be dragged back and forcefully introduced again made goosebumps blossom at the back of his neck, which Shepard carefully stroked away: "But I'm not asking directly, so it's okay, we can play by Lukas' silly little rules and help him at the same time. Isn't that great?"
Shepard watched a lightened smile spread across his son's face, always eager to assist his dad.
"So, to achieve this, I need you to stay down, stay calm, stay open to my words. When you're ready to talk to me, I will listen."
After swallowing a few times, his jaw loosened with a click. Ben was thoroughly poised. Perfect.
"You lived together with Luke?" Shepard tried to suppress any judging tone that possibly snuck its way into his questions.
"Yes," Ben whispered, his voice sounding like it detached to flow freely throughout the tent.
Just as suspected: same city, same vicinity. Shepard would siphon Luke out of the masses until he was sure he was close enough.
"And others too?"
"Yeah."
Shared flat. Close to campus, more than likely. Luke had surrounded himself with many people, many friends, which certainly acted as an extra barrier. Nothing his dad couldn't get out of the way.
"That's so nice, it's important to stay close to the people you love."
Ben nuzzled into the crook of his neck, a compliment Shepard gladly accepted.
"Imagine something for me. Imagine you're back in the house you lived in. You wake up like every morning, the warm sunbeams on your skin welcome the new day, and get dressed in your favorite outfit. You already prepared it the evening before, that's how exited you are to take a stroll through the city."
Ben could see Lukas' room so clearly: the spare sleeping mat he and his roommates had dug up and cramped under the desk. Everything had been cramped ever since he followed his brother out into the real, wild world, but that never stopped them from finding a way for themselves.
"Ready for the day, you step outside. What is the first building you can see?"
The question took a while to settle in, the cogs in Ben's mind worked at a snail's pace: "A restaurant."
"Is it a nice one, an expensive one?"
"Yeah." Luke had invited him there once or twice, only when his paychecks arrived.
"Can you see the name?"
Despite their makeshift living conditions, Shepard wondered if his boys, lacking papers and any kind of formal education, managed to settle in a high-end neighborhood. Meanwhile, Ben smiled weakly, remembering the intense aroma of cinnamon and sprinkles on his tongue.
"What does it say?"
"IHOP."
"Thank you, sweetheart," Shepard coughed and bit his lip hard to hold in his laughter. This narrowed the area down. His Reuben was incredibly helpful indeed, even if he was unable to grasp why.
"Taking in the morning air, you stride along the sidewalk to the nearest street sign. They are fixed on a post, a little plate with letters on it."
"I know, Dad!" he could practically hear Ben roll his eyes if he were in a different state of mind, "I'm not as stupid as you think."
But sweet Ben never paid attention to bland signs that couldn't spark his curiosity, and currently his brain wasn't active enough to produce a dream image.
"What street are you on?"
Ben shrugged innocently: "I dunno."
Prodding further would just risk him getting defensive, a possibility not worth sacrificing his results for. Lukas was practically gifted to Shepard on a silver platter, rushing it was not the way.
"That's alright, Ben. You're doing great, just go back to the house for me and tell me what color it is."
"Bricks," he muttered.
Pinching the bridge of his nose, the tired man tried another strategy: "You walk up to the front door now, please. Slowly, dear, we aren't in a hurry."
A foul lie to calm his all too eager son down; complex assignments usually made Ben confuse himself into a stupor.
"Arriving at the entrance, you look at the facade and somewhere above the doorbells you will see a number. If you tell me which one it is, I'll stop bothering you."
Bother wasn't a word Ben would ever use to describe the breathwork they did together, he may not understand every word that was said or left his own mouth, but nevertheless appreciated this embrace for his soul.
Before his inner eye, the path he walked up countless times before showed itself in great detail: the clear view made of old beer cans and crumbling plaster he never quite got used to. It had to be there somewhere, a few stairs further inside a big circle. Slow, calculating head pats were exchanged for treacherous information.
"The number, sweet thing." If listened closely, maybe one could hear a trace of impatience.
"Four-two-seven," Ben murmured under great exertion.
"There you are. Thank you very much, Ben." A gentle kiss on the crown of his head sealed the deal.
Dad was so proud of him, he did a good job! All was forgiven.
The hard part was over, now Shepard had to ensure that his nestling didn't fledge again. He was truly fortunate that he had such a big heart and dutiful mind.
"How about one more favor for your old man?"
"Okay," Ben's warm breath against his father's chest let them tighten the hug.
"Are you sure? You already did so much for us."
In response, Reuben nodded avidly. He could always assist Dad, he could always prove his worth.
"Well, then. I want you to forget this conversation, Ben. Let it drift out of your head into the world, mix with the wind and get carried far, far away. It would hurt me too much to have you burdened with my worries."
Followed by a deep exhale and final sign of agreement, Ben was placed back on the sea of cushions and blankets beneath him and kindly tucked in. All that was prepared beforehand had found its use, as father and son laid beside each other, hand in hand.
"I'm going to talk to your subconscious now, but you can just simply float along. You don't have to listen to my drivel anymore, starshine, a deeper part will do all the work required. Let go and follow me."
At this final command, the last string that tethered Ben to the waking world slipped from his grasp.
・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・
Thanks for reading 🤍 [Febuwhump 2024 Masterlist]
@febuwhump
#whump#whumpblr#creative writing#whump community#whump drabble#febuwhump#febuwhump2024#febuwhumpday7#emotional manipulation#parental Whumper#hypnosis whump#conditioning#mind control#interrogation#forced betrayal#not Ben's fault :(#recapture#Carewhumper#touchstarved Whumpee#cult setting#conditioned Whumpee#regretful Whumper
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"BUNNY"
And
Sadist Jack (warm feelings) blood play
Pleeeeeeeeeeeasssssse
So I realized after you asked that I actually do have something written for the "bunny" one. 😅So you win the wip prize! There's not much yet, but it's under the cut! (along with Jack thoughts)
From his table in the darkest corner of the room, Zaeed Massani watched as Commander Fucking Shepard herself entered the shittiest bar on Omega. Sure, she was in her civvies, a plain black hoodie covering her trademark red hair, jeans so tight they could have been painted on, but the merc had spent enough time with her on the battlefield that he could recognize her by her walk alone. He briefly considered that the polite thing to do would be to alert her to his presence, give her the option of joining him but he had never been known for his manners. Besides, people didn’t come to this shithole looking for a nice conversation, they came here to drink, fight, or fuck. While Zaeed would never have expected the Hero of the Citadel to show up in a place like this, he supposed it wasn’t that strange. Everybody needed a stiff drink alone once in a while.
So when some dumb young kid in Blue Suns getup made his way across the room and leaned on the bar next to her, lecherous intentions clear in his leering gaze, Zaeed chuckled to himself, waiting for Shepard to toss the little shit on his ass.
Instead, he saw Shepard toss back the contents of her glass, slide off her barstool, and head toward the bathrooms with the man in tow.
Zaeed shook his head hard, like he was trying to clear the image from brain. He had to be imagining things. He wasn’t that far in the bag yet, but maybe his bad eye was playing tricks on him and that wasn’t actually Shepard he had seen. No, he was sure it had been. This must be part of some mission. The guy could be some kind of informant or something. Or maybe she’s just looking for a quick fuck, his brain helpfully supplied. He growled under his breath. It wasn’t that he had her on some kind of fucking pedestal. She was a red-blooded marine and he was sure she enjoyed a good tumble as much as the rest of them. But surely she had better taste than this?
That's as far as I've gotten with that one, sadly. After this, it switches to Shep's pov in the bathroom. The "Bunny" part is the random bar guy asking her name, and she just stares at him and deadpans "Bunny", because she's obviously not here to make any real connections. 😅
Then Zaeed busts into the stall, tosses the poor guy on his ass (pants around his ankles) and tells Shepard there are better options if she's that hard up for a fuck. You can probably figure out where it goes from there. ;)
(I legitimately cannot remember how I was planning to work the "daddy issues" line into it.)
As for the Jack idea, there's really not much. I was just thinking about the line in her loyalty mission about "getting warm feelings during a fight". We know she likes things a bit rough in bed, and it just makes sense to me that, with her conditioning, she would be a sexual sadist.
I'm also really interested in trying to get into the mindset of a sadistic character. I'm very much a masochist myself, but I'd like to examine the flip side of the coin and try to work out what makes them tick.
I also just really like blood play, and there aren't enough fics with it. 😅
Thanks for the challenge and the ask! ❤️This really is encouraging me to get writing. :)
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>> Message Received from its.sophie.please.open
> Coordinates: Feros >Latitude: -70.52834, Longitude: -76.86462
>> Voice Message Received from its.sophie.please.open
>> Play Message
>>Transcript: Krios … um … fuck. Can't believe I'm doing this. I need your help. I walked into a trap. So stupid. Don't know how long I have before they find me. Some crazy bitch after revenge managed to pull one over on m- [startled gasp] shit.
Human, Amanda Olana. Apparently, I killed her brother a couple of years ago. I don't know how she found out. Don't know how I didn't make the connection before I got here. Oversight of the fucking century. Didn't think anything about being hired by some wannabe warlord. How many criminal empires have I been hired by before this?
She's … um … she's taunting me with calls and messages. She knows I'm here.
I'm fucked, Thane. Stuck in a goddamn closet, just waiting for a literal fucking mercenary army to find me … No way out. Only have one gun and a knife. Was supposed to be a quick in and out job. No games. Ha. So stupid, was gonna "play it safe."
[Sharp inhale, crying]
I sent the coordinates ahead of this. I don't think she'd go through all this trouble if she didn't want to make it last, hurt me real bad first. You know me, I'm a big girl, I can handle pain. It doesn't scare me. It's not my first rodeo with torture.
But fuck, [hard sobbing] I'm scared of dyin'. An assassin who's afraid to die, fuckin' stupidest thing. 'Specially with how we carry on.
[Deep inhale, exhale]
They'll be here soon. I'm gonna take as many out as I can before they get me, so it may end up a moot point if I eat a bullet or piss someone off too much. I don't really expect you to come, but I've got no one else to even ask. If there is an afterlife and you don't come for me, I won't hold it against you. I've more'n earned this fate. I know that.
I know I'm rambling, don't know what else to do. Nice to know someone's going to hear what might be my last words, I guess.
Do me a favor, Thane? If … um … if I don't make it, or you decide not to come for me, will you go visit momma's grave for me? She's buried at Elk Gap Memorial Gardens in Elk Gap, Tennessee, North America. Earth, obviously. [crying] Her name is Hannah Shepard, S-H-E-P-A-R-D in the English alphabet.
There's a honeysuckle plant growin' on a … a fence near her plot. It looks kind of wild, it's a plant with little yellow and white flowers. I know you'll recognize the smell before you see 'em. Put some on her marker for me, they were her favorite. Tell her that Marcy missed her, but I probably didn't get into heaven, she won't see me again.
You have my permission to carve my initials next to her name. Closest I'll ever be to her again. Ah … shit …
[Her voice falters, only crying can be heard.]
Now you know who I am, where I'm from. I tried to hide it … from myself mostly. Sad little orphan from some hick town in the mountains. Seems so stupid now. Who gives a shit where I'm from? Hell, most aliens don't recognize our accents, and I don't have any family to protect. Just my own fuckin' pride. Don't even remember why I started pretendin' to be someone else. It started before I became a killer.
They're getting closer. I'll make every bullet count. Try to hold on as long as I can after they catch me.
I'm sorry, Thane. For puttin' this on you, and for everything else. Hope you'll pray for my soul if things go more fucked than they already are. Kind of hope that your afterlife is real.
Always liked the sea.
Goodbye, Thane. Hope I see you again, and not just because you're the only hope I've got.
[Deep inhale, exhale]
[Singing, shakily] You are my sunshine, my only sunshine, you make me happy when skies are gray. You'll never know, dear, how much I love you. Please don't take my sunshine away.
[Whispering] Fuck, I'm so scared.
>>End Transcript.
#“play message” is a link to an actual recording#is that my voice? is that my voice?#yes#I wrote and recorded this while I had a fever#don't know if I'm gonna end up going anywhere with it#part of my wicked game series if i ever actually write more of it#mass effect#my writing#fanfiction#assassin v assassin au garbage#shrios
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Weirdwolf
I'm noticing something about my wolf form that's kinda having me questioning whether it's actually a wolf or not... while I'm laying there, I can kinda tell what I'm gonna become, what shape I'll take, etc. Wolf form has shorter hind legs than any wolf I've seen so far. In fact, my back slopes similar to a show German Shepard.
Wolf shifters aren't exactly real wolves, so some degree of deviation would be expected... but I don't know if that would apply to my legs only?
And here, since it might be hard for others to understand how I'm getting so confused, I drew a picture of just what I feel and "see" when shifting:
I know my muzzle is black, I suspect the rest of me is black, my paws don't have rough pads like canines do (there's pads, but they're less pronounced, they're almost like the "pawpads" of human feet in texture), I have a broad chest and a lot of fur, especially on my back and tail (the length you're seeing there is mostly just fur lol). I know I'm a social animal, I wouldn't mind a pack or family with me and being solitary doesn't seem right, although that could just be my human personality and not applicable to what I become.
This isn't anything spiritual, so I can't trigger a shift in the same way I would a non-physical shift and analyze it further. It'd be easier if I could. I can try, but I don't get too far, and I'm worried about accidentally placebo'ing it and seeing what I want to see, instead of what is actually there. I've tried looking into hyenas again, but something about them doesn't seem quite right... my mind seems insistent on wolf right now, either because there's not enough evidence to conclude hyena or because I really am just an atypical wolf.
I guess I'll have to wait again till another shift happens! ...whenever that is...
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Genesis 4
4:1 This is the first real mention of Eve, before it was just "wife." Now it mentions that "Adam knew Eve," In this connotation, it means they had intercourse. The result is Cain, the firstborn son.
4:2 Abel born after Cain. Both of them played different roles. Cain was a "tiller of the ground" while Abel was "shepard of sheep."
4:3-5 Both offer sacrifices related to their expertise. God respected Abel's offering but not Cain's. Abel's offering was the "firstborn of his flock and of their fat" while Cain's offering was from the "fruits of the ground." Why would God dislike one person's offering if they both provided from what they specialized in? From how it is worded, we can be sure that Abel's sacrifice was significant because it was the firstborn and fatty. Cain's sacrifice could be interpreted in different ways. "From the fruits of the ground" could imply that the fruits were from the plants nourished from the ground. This verse could also mean that the fruits he offered for sacrifice were the rotten fruits that had already fallen to the ground. Because the verse states that they are "fruits OF the ground" rather than fruits ON the ground, I assume the former interpretation where Cain offered good fruits from his work.
Also, this is the first instance of sacrifice we see in the Bible. Why do we need to sacrifice? It was never a decree stated by God to offer sacrifices. Are sacrifices man's way of trying to appease God, when before our fall our pure existence was enough to appease Him?
4:6-7 God confronts Cain and asks why he should be sad. God says that although you brought the sacrifice rightly, it was not divided properly. What does that mean? Where do we find sacrificial rules if this is the first instance? This next part of the verse states that Abel should find recourse in Cain and that Cain should rule over Abel. Why have the roles seemingly switched here? Also, when seeing sad Cain, God says, "Be still." This must mean controlling the fluctuations in your head and emotions.
4:8 Cain kills Abel in seclusion. They talked beforehand. I'm wondering if that was to entice Abel to come to the fields or if it was to discuss what had happened at the sacrifice. Also, I'm curious as it says that they were in the fields: does this mean garden fields (Cain's territory) or sheep fields (Abel's territory)?
4:9 God here asks a question again to man. Since God already knows what is happening, this might be the second instance of opportunity for repentence seen in the Bible. Instead of repenting, Cain replies with arrogance: "Am I my brother's keeper?"
4:10 This sounds almost poetic, "The voice of your brother's blood cries out to Me from the ground." This is the first instance of where we see death and the fact of life after death. If there was no life after death, then it would be impossible for Abel to cry out to God.
4:11-12 Cain is cursed, the grounds should be hard and it is no longer easy to garden.
4:13 I find it mature and humbling to see Cain recognize his position he found himself in, or that just might be despair: "My guilt is too great to be forgiven!"
4:14-15 Cain worries that since he has been driven out from the face of the Earth and sorrowful, he is in danger of being killed by whoever comes across him. Why should someone be condemned to death for being sorrowful? Maybe because they see the impurity of a person, which has no place in God's creation? But that doesn't make sense because the first people were impure for eating the forbidden fruit. God calms Cain's worries by giving Cain a mark that ensures that if anyone kills Cain shall face a 7x vengeance. This is the second instance we see the number 7, in this context it seems arbitrary, but it also appears in the 7 days of creation.
Side note: Cain is worried about someone finding him and killing him. By name, the only people we know are Cain, Abel, Adam, and Eve. Since Abel is out of the picture, that means there is only Adam and Eve. It wouldn't make sense that Cain would be worried about his parents trying to kill him. Also if Cain was just worried about his parents trying to kill him, I feel like he would have phrased his concerns differently. Which means that there must have been other people living at the same time. Where did these other people come from? I am assuming that Adam and Eve had other children that were not explicitly mentioned by name. Also, it was never stated that Cain was the firstborn from Adam and Eve.
Side note pt.2: The fact that God does not leave Cain for himself but imparts a mark on him that if anyone else were to harm Cain, they would be harmed 7x. This is another instance of love we see, unconditional love. Even when the child has committed murder, the Father still looks after him and wishes the best for him. Don't get me wrong, God might still be mad, and that is perfectly normal, but above that anger lies love.
4:16 Cain leaves the "presence of the Lord" and lives in Nod. So this. is the official leaving of Eden. First, man was in paradise in Eden. Then, man was cast out of paradise but still in Eden (?). Now man leaves Eden. I wonder what 'Nod' means. Also mentions that Cain leaves the presence of the Lord. This probably means that Cain left the physical presence of God, not God's omnipresent watch.
4:17 Cain knew his wife, wife is left unnamed. Cain had a son with his wife named Enoch. Cain built a city and named it after his son. I wonder what a "city" was like back then, especially with significantly fewer people. Also, if Cain built a city, then what happened to Nod? Is it rather the name of the land? I would think Nod is the name of the land and Enoch is now a city in Nod.
4:18 Statment of lineage: Enoch to Irad to Mehujael to Methushael to Lamech.
4:19 First mention of a man having two wives. Lamech has Adah and Zillah.
4:20-21 Adah bore Jabal, who was the father of the people who dwelled in tents and had livestock. Adah also bore Jubal who played instruments. This is the first instance we see animal farming and musical art. Art previously was comprised of God's work, while this example of music is human-derived.
4:22 Zillah bore Tubal-Cain who was a smith. Zillah also bore Naamah. Naamah is the only female offspring and the only one who was not given any role or title.
Side Note: When lineage is portrayed, it is always listed under the name of the Father. This shows patriarchal lineage. This statement is also supported by the mention of the contribution of each of Lamech's sons but not his only daughter.
4:23 Lamech speaks to his wives. Interestingly he says "wives of Lamech" rather than 'my wives.' Is this because of the grammatical structure of the language they used? He attests that he killed a man for "wounding" him and a young man for "hurting" him. It is as if Lamech is basing his authority on his ability to do cruelty. This might be the first instance of rule by fear. Although previously God had instructed man not to do things in fear of death, God did not leverage death so that man had no choice but to listen to His word. Lamech on the other hand is leveraging death for any form of denial to his requests. Lamech seems to be following the principle of if you do me harm then I will give it back to you manyfold.
4:24 Lamech states his status over Cain, stating that Lamech should have 77x avengement if Cain had 7x avengement. Lamech is probably basing this claim on the action of human harm. In Lamech's mind, the stronger and more able one is to inflict harm on other humans, the more power and divine retribution received from God. If God had loved violence and harm, why would God have offered man opportunities of repentence for both Adam and Cain? I think God does not focus on harm and power for one human over another (other than what was mentioned about Adam over Eve).
4:25 Adam and Eve bore another son named Seth. It's surprising that Adam and Eve are still around and able to produce children after many generations from Cain. Maybe the span of life was different back then. Seth is created in a position to essentially be Abel's successor of purity, rather than letting just Cain's lineage live.
Side note: Adam says that he finally has another seed aside from Cain and Abel. This statement provides evidence that Adam did not have any other sons. But that does not discount that Adam might have had many daughters that were not named. Otherwise, where did all the humans come from? If daughters were never named then that would follow the theme of the importance of men for lineage. But also if females were never named, then why was Naamah named?
4:26 Seth had a son named Enosh. It is stated that "he hoped in the Lord God and called upon His name." Who is "he" in this instance? Is it referring to Enosh or Seth? Since the comma is before "and" in the sentence, I am assuming it is Seth. Also this is the first explicit reference to prayer in the Bible. Interestingly, those descendants of Cain lived lives that were Earthly while those descendants of Seth seemed to have a Godly focus. For context, Cain's lineage was also raised in Nod while Seth probably never left Eden, where Adam and Eve were. So that is one argument for the nurture aspect of personality.
Other Remarks:
If Cain, Abel, and Seth were the only sons of Adam and Eve, then that would imply that Cain was afraid of being killed by a daughter of Adam and Eve. This is interesting because it contradicts the power of man over woman.
Cain's sorrow did not ask for repentance. The root of Cain's anger was grief at the disappointment and humiliation of his sacrifice not being accepted by God. The lesson that we must take from this is that we need to process our emotions and ground them. Leaving emotions unchecked can manifest themselves in different and malicious ways, both for others and for ourselves.
Questions:
Why are sacrifices necessary?
Why was God not appeased with Cain's offering? What does it mean that Cain's offering was not "divided" properly?
Where did the other humans that are unnamed come from?
What did Seth call out to God for?
Things to Add to Prayer:
Help us to "be still" in times of sorrow and anguish.
Help us acknowledge our arrogance and shortcomings
Help us to unconditionally love, like you loved your creation.
Help us not to view the world through the lens of self-fulfillment but rather the fulfillment of your will.
-Mikhael
#Genesis#Adam and Eve#Seth#Adam's lineage#bible reading#eden#cain and abel#bible study#Paradise#Lamech
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I have been tagged by @sugaraddictarchangels! ^-^
Your name: I am Will. Still debating acquiring other names.
Your first fandom(s): HP, but let's not talk about that. The real shit was in the Warriors fandom. I survived wars in there. Cat wars.
Your current fandom(s): Primarily Supernatural. (It's my special interest! I do not have a choice in being here! uwu!) but also, rotating around Mass Effect, Succession, and if Cat succeeds in drawing me back in, I'm gonna end up in my Elder Scrolls phase again.
How did you first get into fandom? Well, you see, I was given far too much unrestricted access to the internet as a child. And I wanted to read Everything.
How long have you been engaging in fandom spaces? Forever? Forever. Long as I can remember, anyway, which to be fair, isn't very long.
How often do you read fanfics? Well, damn, dude, I just set one down to come answer this. (Really though, a lot. Idk I like seeing the blorbos dance. And also I'm still experiencing some burn-out from having to be autistic and in college and such so actual books... no. only blorbo.)
Top three characters from your current fandom(s):
Supernatural: Sam Winchester the most character of all time. Lucifer! Second most character of all time! and rn, Michael. but that third slot is always subject to change. Last week it was Raphael lmao.
Mass Effect: Legion. They're my favorite robot, I want their gender and their name. Tali'Zorah nar Rayya, genuinely my favorite teammate and I think she has the best plotline through all three games don't @ me. and hm. hard choice. Joker. Because he is funny. Because his relationship to Shepard is maybe my favorite out of anyone's, even the romance options. (Tiptree + "Anderson told me to take care of you" conversation in my mind always at all times...)
Succession: (okay this is cruel this is actually like asking me to pick a favorite child. but i will.) Shiv my beloved my queen i would die for her. Gerri my other beloved and queen i would also die for her. and Roman, my favorite little guy with everything in the world wrong with him.
Elder Scrolls: Martin Septim & the v specific version of Hero of Kvatch who does mantle Sheogorath, yes, both of them together, they are a set but the point is that they are separated by fate and godhood. and then also Nazeem. because he is funny. I wrote a whole fic about him.
Have you ever written fic for a fandom? YES! someone go read my silly mass effect fic i just wrote i crave attention
Have you ever drawn fanart for a fandom? Also yes. I don't post much and what I have I delete later because it's never good enough. i am. hard on my art.
Share a personal headcanon that you feel very strongly about: sam is queer of sexuality and trans of gender. end of story. (and the reason I feel strongly about this is people who claim he's 'too boring' to be queer. first of all, you're wrong, he's amazing. second of all, you don't earn queerness by being cool. you just are. fandoms stop treating queerness as a reward for some characters and being cishet as a punishment for others challenge.)
You’re trying to convince a friend to get into your current fandom(s) with you. what episode, clip, or scene are you showing them? Depends on the friend. But I stand by that if you want to infect someone with the spn brainworms, give them a copy of john's journal and watch the rot set in.
And finally, what does fandom mean to you? it's all of us sitting around a campfire sharing insane takes.
I am tagging... hm. @godsprettiestprincess, @synesindri, @archangelsammy, @herefortears, @ladyknightskye, @thnks-fr-th-samulet, and anyone else who wants in. :3
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I admittedly have only played ME1 but yeah. I was hyped for Garrus because I knew he was really popular and he was ultimately a dull and crappy person :\ Maybe he gets better later I dunno.
Like if you were looking for a Murder Lizard as a favourite Wrex is RIGHT THERE. Better personality, better motivations, better design. (Maybe it’s silly to compare them but STILL)
So many people say 'oh that's just ME1!' and that he gets so much better and deeper and more complex and etc. in 2/3 once Bioware saw his popularity and decided to play into it by giving him more attention (like the whole making him a romance option due to fan demand).
But I just... don't buy it?
(Hope you don't mind character spoilers since I'm gonna get into the rest of his arc here. Skip the following paragraph if you do?)
So like, I played a pretty much full blown Paragon in my first playthrough, which meant my Shepard spent pretty much the entirety of her interactions with Garrus in ME1 trying to rein him in and slowly but surely teach him the simplest of moral lessons like 'shoot first, ask questions later bad;' 'taking law into own hands bad;' 'disdain for due process bad;' and 'extrajudicial executions REAL BAD BUDDY.' ....Aaand then ME2 started and he'd taken what he learned from Shepard and gone off and become a fucking vigilante in the interim. Admittedly, there's some understandable circumstances that explain why Shepard's lessons didn't stick, it makes perfect sense why he regressed, was actually good writing, yadda yadda. But dammit dude! Did you learn nothing?? And it REALLY doesn't help that the fanbase saw that and was like 'WOW Garrus is so BADASS now!' and Bioware just played right into that perception. Like, it really hurts the narrative of a character who thinks he's above the law and wants to met out vigilante justice learning restraint and that killing isn't a solution to all life's problems if you're constantly playing up how COOL being a 'plays by his own rules' vigilante he is, Bioware! By ME3, he gets straight up rewarded for all of this by attaining a position of respect/authority within the Turian Hierarchy (you know, that notoriously by the book militaristic society). And it kinda... reframed his whole struggle into not being able to follow bad orders (like a good little turian should) and not being comfortable with the "ruthless calculus" of leadership/war? The dude who when you first met him didn't care about innocents getting caught in the crossfire of his actions? Apparently that was his issue with following rules all along?? 🙄
And then there's the whole Bioware pandering to his fan favorite status by basically forcing him onto the player as Shepard's best friend/100% trusted and valued second in command by the end. Personally, my Shepard was too preoccupied with concerns he was a hairsbreadth away from mowing down innocents (or supposed criminals who really should get a fair trial before we decide if they're guilty or not, Garrus!) to ever bond that deeply with him. But sure Bioware, "there's no Shepard without Vakarian."
(and lol hard agree on Wrex being way cooler. he had a better voice/design from the get go and had a MUCH more satisfying arc by the end imo.)
#domande#youngerfrankenstein#sto parlando#tbc i don't actually dislike garrus or anything. his rapport with the rest of the crew is very fun and he;s got some good one liners and al#but goddamn was the standom surrounding him annoying
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ac6 true ending spoilers below the readmore
even when he manages to claw himself into True Final Boss status Iguazu is so decidedly just some fucking nobody. just some utterly irrelevant cog in this insane machine of machinations and plots and corporate interests, whose only claim to relevance is that he's so insanely self conscious about existing in the same universe as A Super Protagonist that he's driven to madness with hate. it's so delightfully pathetic.
and all this is also what ultimately makes him the most relatable character in the game too. because I'm pretty sure most people on the fucking planet would react exactly like him if confronted with the idea that their occasional coworker/business rival is somehow the universe's designated Special Person for no clear rhyme or reason
the game makes a big deal about Raven's agency, about the symbol of resolve. Raven is a big deal because Raven is the one entity in this story that actually gets the ability to influence how the tale goes. An abberration in ALLMIND's words. and Iguazu is in this horrible eldritch position of being one of the few people to get how singularly unique Raven in this regard, but unable to comprehend why. He doesn't have the perspective of Walter or Arye, who shepard Raven along on their journey and see their growth, who build trust in their superhuman ability to Always Get The Job Done. He's just left, maddeningly, with the question. What Makes You So Special.
and what, truly, makes Raven so special? within the narrative you could point out that they made contact with Ayre, that they're the one of Walter's hounds that managed to make it this far, but that's kind of just happenstance isn't it? It doesn't actually give us an answer. The real, metatextually obvious answer is because Raven is the player character's avatar. Because Raven gets the freedom to try and try and try again from checkpoints and seemingly infinite resources to try whatever AC configurations they need to learn what works best and replay missions over and over until they can route them perfectly with information they simply should not have as a textual character. And Iguazu is the only person that sees this. The only one that stops to question it. Because it makes no sense! NO fucking sense!!! WHY is Raven always perfect, always upstaging him. WHY does this one independent merc get to so singularly affect this insane corporate forever war, why does this fucking nobody get to progress all these mad conspiracy plots to their own end??
and the simple fact is there is no reason. the only reason exists solely in the metatext: Raven is the player character. But Iguazu cannot see the metatext: he is stuck in the text, confined to the text. All he has is the question. All he has is the fact that he's the sole person that's left asking the question. And the question drives him so mad that he cannot help but scream it, cry it, clawing at it until the very bitter end of the game. clawing at it so hard that he HAS to be the final thing you face he just fucking HAS to try TO THE END
#this went from appreciating the funny angry loser guy to a mad rant where I think I started directly channeling Iguazu himself at some point#all media analysis here could probably be stated much more concisely if I hadn't done that. but anyway#I think I'm basically just restating the same point three paragraphs over here
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i'm trying to sort out torfan specifics for fic writing purposes and boy, this is a pain in the ass. i do like that it's kept intentionally vague because it leaves me a lot of wiggle room to fill in the gaps to my preference. my issue is more in the fact the information they do give you is so vague as to be worthless, because a lot of the military terminology mass effect uses doesn't seem to parallel real life. i guess that could be a pro in and of itself because it allows for free reign to believe whatever you want, but i like having a jumping board to work off, personally.
the character creation screen says that shepard sent 3/4ths of their unit to die. but then the personal history codex entry says shepard led a corps. when i go to research military terminology, corps and units are apparently two different things with massively different numbers involved. i find it incredibly hard to believe that, even in an emergency chain of command type situation, a 24 year old marine commanded upwards of 20,000+ other marines and sent 3/4ths of them to their deaths.
it seems a lot more realistic that the number is significantly lower than that. according to this wiki page, a majority of units seem to be below 1,000 people. this would also make more sense with what we do know of torfan - that the slaver base was underground, and they had to fight melee instead of by artillery strikes. getting more people into an underground base is easier the less people you have. i have 0 military knowledge, so this is just me throwing some wall spaghetti, but a company or battalion seem the most plausible to me - so that's 80 to 1,000 people. i personally think the lower end of battalion (300) is more realistic number to work with than 1,000. that's still a fairly wide margin, but it's something more concrete to bounce off.
it would mean that the alliance had anywhere from 60 (80 x .75) to 225 (300 x .75) casualties. extrapolating the batarian losses is a lot more difficult and i wouldn't even know where to begin. i don't even know that you could say "well, torfan more or less ended the conflict with the batarians, so it had to be a lot!" because it could've been the decisive victory by virtue of the fact torfan seemed to be an overall base of operations, and its elimination could've just made organizing further efforts in the verge more difficult and more trouble than it's worth, esp. if any technology or resources were also lost on torfan (which is likely) and the fact batarians already suffered a series of losses before torfan.
i'll probably just end up throwing a dart to pick a number that feels high enough to stir the controversy ruthless shep inspires, but low enough that it doesn't feel (personally) absurd they're still trusted to command
(whether or not what ruthless shepard does on torfan is considered a war crime is unclear to me, considering mass effect is milprop regardless so the protagonist being a war criminal more or less serves the purpose of the series. i do personally lean toward it being morally condemned, but not legally a war crime - what is and isn't a war crime by humanity standards likely does not match with citadel morals or laws, let alone with turian, asari, salarian, etc. but that's deserving of its own post and i should stop here before i get more distracted.)
#thinky thoughts#background talk#literally just wrote this to organize my own thoughts so i could continue writing ✌️#but if anyone has any actual military knowledge and could shed some light on this it could be informative#mass effect
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heyy its the Jack hc’s anon. I was thinking like affection/fluff hc’s about her and Shepard(either Renegade or Paragon) Cannon gives us so little about her apart from the 1 scene in me2 and m3 :(( Or maybe a scenario of a Renegade!Shepard actually taking up her offer to go pirate after the Suicide mission instead of heading to Earth? She’s such a ride or die of a person that i can 100% see it happening. Now that I’m replaying the games actually (just finished 2 again) it seems so out of character for like 80% of the crew to just give Shepard up with little to no fight or maybe that’s just my opinion. I have a. love/hate relationship with the writing of the end of ME2. What are your thoughts on it?( or maybe im just heading in with too much expectation after playing BG3)
a little personal headcannon of mine is that she writes Shepard short poems but refuses to show them to anyone :)
Alright, I've added fluffy Jack headcanons to my list! I'll post it in some days.
And omfg yes! Poetry! I've read the Shadowbroker intel on her and god her poem was actually good. It's so endearing how she managed to find an artistic release for her emotions, especially with how much she tries hard to appear tough on the surface.
I see her writing down her emotions on Shepard since the first time her heart fluttered, and up to the time she actually admitted her feelings. How she's not used to this. Sex is just sex, nothing big. But love? Actual love? She feels like a fish out of water. Very clumsily trying to find her way through this.
For the pirate thing, I actually theorise that she didn't mean it when she first suggested it. That she just said that to get Shepard to leave Cerberus and maybe Jack planned to bacstab you afterwards.
But Ironically, the more she got to know you afterwards, the more she fell in love and the pirate offer with her as your executionor starting sounding a little too sincere. What started as a manipulation tactic, quickly evolved into a genuine dream of hers that she hoped you wouldn't forget.
For Paragon Shepard, they do surrender themselves to the alliance right? I'm not sure what Renegade Shepard does but I don't think they'd want to make themselves a wanted war criminal on the run, Renegade priorities their self interest first and still holding onto their hero fame and statues by complying with the alliance seems the most self serving even if they hate it.
I romanced Thane, and he mentioned that he tried to get in touch, but the Alliance blocked all his attempts. And he's like a master assassin. He never uses his real name or leaves a trail behind. So imagine how intense the security must have been around Shepard.
Even Miranda needs our help to get access to the Alliance files in ME3. Miranda. The Alliance really are no joke, and even Cerberus struggle with them, so imagine being one pirate on the run from them.
I assume everyone else also tried to get into contact with Shepard but got blocked or stopped before anything could reach their commander. Especially since Shepard was kept on earth, any alien would stand out there, and hitting the hornet's nest is never a good idea.
The only ones with the slightest chance of making it to Shepard would've been Joker, Ashley, and Kaidan.
For me the ending of ME2 with the batarians whole things just feels...forced? Like they needed Shepard to do something drastic so they threw it in. The reapers coming through the relay felt so out of place with the whole collectors thing.
Because the do come eventually, they do arrive later in ME3 so what difference did it make but make Shepard go under court for a while? They did it to delay the reapers and give people more time to prepare for the war, but no one prepared shit. They arrive and kick earth in the balls and all of thos batarians died for nothing.
I mean at least if they had died from the reapers then the blood wouldn't have been on Shepard's hands, and the rest of the galaxy would've had a little bit more time to prepare while the reapers are busy with the batarians. Earth wouldn't have been patient number zero.
If they had believed Shepard, It would've have been worth it. But they didn't, nothing changed. And now I'm just more pissed at the asair and how the favouritism they got from the protheons and the way they threw it away and hoarded knowledge.
I am also pissed at Liara's response to thussia when Shepard and Garrus both witnessed the literal same thing but oh it's okay for humans and turians to watch their planets burn, it's only bad when the poor asari have it done to them because they're hot you see :(
Like I usually adore Liara and her writing, she proves your expectations wrong at every turn but they massively dropped the ball with Thussia and making her have a breakdown over it when she hasn't showed the slightest remorse for when earth was burning or Garrus saw the city he was born in ablaze. I feel like they made her weaker on purpose just to have a scene of us comforting her, when normal Liara would've took it in stride like the soldier shadowbroker she is.
Also I adore Jack's character development in ME3 because that's exactly the direction I hoped they'd go for when I took her on the biotics field suicide mission in ME2. My vision was that I wanted to show her that she can protect others with her biotics and not just harm people.
And that's exactly what she does with her little guys, she is so protective of them and encouraging. She knows what it's like to grow up alone with no friends, she has had it worse than most kids and she felt all the pain. Yet she gave her students none of the pain, she broke the cycle of abuse by herself without our help and wanted to be a better person for them.
She wanted to become the person she needed most when she was a kid, I admire her for that.
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WIP Mass Effect
Haven't done one of these in a while so I'm starting off the new year with an excerpt from my Mass Effect project. Have a bit from one of Joker's movie's nights on the SR-1 set during ME1.
~ ~ ~
“Have you seen this one?” Reese whispered as she leaned over, her shoulder bumping Alenko’s.
Kaidan shook his head. “Nope. Not this one. I’ve heard of it but never seen it. I think I might have seen the remake with my mom but I’m not sure.”
He glanced down. Even sitting, he was a couple of inches taller than her. Leaning down he said, “You could always look it up like you normally do when you have no idea what’s going on.”
Grey eyes glanced up at him. “I’m trying something new this time.”
“By not looking it up on the extranet?” he asked with a grin.
“You seem to get annoyed when I do that, so I thought I’d just go in blind,” she said reluctantly.
“How’s that working out for you?” he asked with amusement in his voice and making no effort to hide his grin.
Reese glared at him as she crossed her arms and sat up straight. Taking her refusal to speak as her answer, the Sentinel went back to watching the latest movie Joker had picked out. It was ‘The Blob’ starring Steven McQueen and Aneta Corsaut. He guessed it was supposed to be a horror flick aimed at teenagers, but he had been truthful when he told Reese he’d never seen this one. One from the 1980s seemed more familiar but even then, he wasn’t totally for sure. He’d have to ask his mom the next time he called home.
“What is the creature’s purpose?” Liara asked from the front row. Joker had insisted she sit next to him for a lesson in human entertainment. Kaidan wasn’t sure if it was so she would stop asking questions in the middle of the movies or because he really did think she needed a tutor in the area. Honestly he wouldn’t have put past the pilot to be both reasons.
“It’s the blob, Liara,” the Flight Lt. said as he motioned to the gelatinous mass moving across the screen looking for its next victim. “It’s only purpose is to eat people and get bigger.”
“But why?” she asked.
“Because it’s a horror movie,” Joker explained in a very patient tone considering it was interrupting his viewing of the movie he’d picked out. “It’s meant to scare the audience. It isn’t supposed to make perfect sense. It’s supposed to scare you.”
“It’s like those stories your parents tell you as a child to get you to not do something,” Garrus tried as he sat next to the archaeologist. “You know. The ones that involve something bad happening, like a monster eating you or something if you do whatever the naughty thing is you’re not supposed to do.”
“I suppose…” she said thoughtfully. “My studies have shown that many cultures pass down myths and legends that are similar to what you speak of.”
“Right,” Joker added as he pointed at the large screen again. “It’s like that with humans too. We use movies for that. Or they did a lot back in the day.”
“Quarians tell stories of the Geth in such a manner,” Tali chimed in. “I find it hard to believe the Asari don’t have something similar in your culture.”
“We do. But we are brought up to know they are not real. That it is simply a story,” Liara said. “We do not enjoy being scared with myths. History has provided enough real things to be scared of.”
“Like the Reapers,” Shepard noted from the row behind them.
Liara nodded. “Though, most people do not believe in them. They find it much more…comfortable to believe the Protheans are the oldest beings to exist.”
Ashley sat beside the Commander as she leaned back in her chair. “Are we gonna watch this or debate it’s historical value?”
“I am sorry,” Liara sputtered. “Joker offered to help be understand. I did not mean to interrupt—”
“It’s fine, Liara,” the N7 said as he jabbed the Gunnery Chief in the arm. “The movie is a little weird even for Joker.”
Kaidan had watched the exchange in silence as Reese tilted her head. He could almost hear the wheels spinning in her head as she tried to figure out something that really wasn’t meant to make scientific sense in a 1950s horror movie. Wondering how long it would take her to flip open her omni-tool and look up whatever it was, he was surprised when she perked up and whispered almost to herself, “Phagocytosis.”
“What?” he asked in confusion.
“Phagocytosis,” she repeated as she looked up at him. “It’s the answer to Dr. T’Soni’s question.”
“Ummm, okay,” he replied uncertainly. “I thought Joker and the others answered it.”
“No—Well, yes in a way but there is a scientific explanation,” she replied.
“Everything good back there, Reese?” the Specter asked as he turned to glance at the two Lt.’s.
“Ah, yes, sir. I just remembered something that would actually explain the blob’s behavior in an actual scientific way,” she said.
“Wanna share with the class?” her CO asked as Joker paused the movie.
“Really? You wanna nerd out on a B movie?” the pilot asked in annoyance.
“You better let her, Joker, or she’ll start reading everything the extranet has to offer during the rest of the movie,” Alenko suggested as the L3 bumped him with her shoulder.
“Fiiiinnneeee,” the bearded pilot said as Liara turned around patiently waiting for the answer.
Reese glanced up at Kaidan who only grinned and motioned for her to begin. She made a face at him and then started, “Phagocytosis is basically a process a cell uses its plasma membrane to engulf a particle of something. It’s like when it engulfs a pathogen. It’s a type of endocytosis. It’s a biological process in multicellular organisms that helps remove pathogens and cell debris—bacteria, dead tissue cells, and the like. Some protozoa even use it to obtain their nutrients.”
“Oh, well, that actually makes sense,” the Asari doctor mused as she turned back around. “Thank you, Lt. Reese.”
“No problem,” the ops officer said as she leaned back in her chair again.
“Can I start the movie again?” Joker asked impatiently.
“Go ahead,” Shepard said as the rest of the crew returned their attention to the movie.
After a few minutes, Kaidan leaned down and asked, “How’d you know all that?”
She shrugged. “I’m good with science facts.”
“Kori,” he said hoping to let her know he really wanted to know.
She sighed. “My grandfather was a biologist. I was around a lot of his work after he retired and started consulting and volunteering. He helped develop a lot of treatments for very specific conditions before he passed away.”
“Oh, I—I didn’t know,” Kaidan said, feeling bad for pushing. “I’m sorry. I—”
She shook her head. “Don’t be sorry. He was a good man that did a lot for a lot of people. It’s been a while anyway, but I know he’s always with me. Watching out for me. So, it’s all good.”
Alenko was quiet for a moment and then said attempting to lighten the mood, “I bet he never thought you’d use what you learned from him to explain the motivation of a monster from a B movie to an Asari.”
“Nope,” Reese said with a grin. “I don’t think he ever would have.”
#wip whenever#mass effect#kaidan alenko#kori reese#male commander shepard#liara t’soni#normandy crew#my stories
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🎶 for shoker, shrios, AND revanderous >:D
Aye aye *salutes* You got it!
Aurora Shepard/Jeff Moreau (Shoker)
"You Are In Love" by Travis Atreo
Morning, his place
Burnt toast, Sunday
You keep his shirt
He keeps his word
And for once you let go
Of your fears and your ghosts
One step, not much,
but it said enough
You kissed on sidewalks
You fight and you talk
One night he wakes, strange look on his face
Pauses, then says,
"You're my best friend"
And you knew what it was
He is in love
Charley Shepard/Thane Krios (Shrios)
"Eyelids" by PVRIS
I'll face my fear of the evening
once I get used to this feeling.
I can't sleep,
That's when you're torn away from me.
While I'm dreaming I feel you leaving.
I'll face my fear of the sunrise
when I wake up with your hand inside mine.
It's hard to say "good morning"
when it's followed with "goodbye".
Our eyes fighting the light,
But I'm not ready to say "good night".
I try and hold on tight
cause it's just not time to say "good night".
Say good night.
Revan/Canderous (Revanderous)
"Die For You" by Starset
I will run alone tonight
Without you by my side
I guess you had a place you had to get to
I know your eyes
I know inside
The walls you hide behind
And I saw the truth inside the real you
Because I know you're lost when you run away
Into the same black holes and black mistakes
Taking all my will just to run alone
When are you coming home?
Even if the sky does fall
Even if they take it all
There's no pain that I won't go through
Even if I have to die for you
And when all the fires burn
When everything is overturning
There's no thing that I won't go through
Even if I have to die for you
#aroserinosman#otp song meme#music#shoker#aurora x joker#shrios#charley x thane#revanderous#revan x canderous#i'm obsessed with shoker's newest song
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Tag drop: Character Tags Pt 1
— ❛❛ // MAKO ¦ My Oath to Always be a Shield through any Storm・ 「 Threads」
— ❛❛ // MAKO ¦ My Everything has Always been yours my heart・ 「 Musings」
— ❛❛ // YOTSUYU GOE BRUTUS ¦ My appetite for your agony is as an abyss-bottomless. Insatiable.・ 「 Musings」
— ❛❛ // YOTSUYU GOE BRUTUS ¦Speak not of things that would disrupt their common dreary lives.・ 「Threads」
— ❛❛ // JILL VALENTINE ¦You want S.T.A.R.S? I'll give you S.T.A.R.S! ・ 「 Threads」
— ❛❛ // JILL VALENTINE ¦The ashes of Raccoon City would be Umbrella's ashes too.・ 「 Musings」
— ❛❛ // JILL VALENTINE ¦ Don't you trust your partner?・ 「 Playlist」
— ❛❛ // JILL VALENTINE ¦ I can handle this on my own. And don't call me little girl・ 「 Headcanons」
— ❛❛ // CLAIRE REDFIELD ¦You've got two choices here: kill or be killed, your call!・「 Musings」
— ❛❛ // CLAIRE REDFIELD ¦ VISAGE・
— ❛❛ // CARLOS OLIVEIRA ¦ I told you I couldn't leave you in a Carlos-less world. That would just be too cruel. ・
— ❛❛ // ASHLEY GRAHAM ¦I'm never turning into one of them! Never!・ 「 Threads」
— ❛❛ // ASHLEY GRAHAM ¦Sunshine in the Darkness.・ 「 Musings」
— ❛❛ // ASHLEY GRAHAM ¦ VISAGE・
— ❛❛ // ADA WONG ¦You look like you've seen a ghost・ 「 Musings」
— ❛❛ // ADA WONG ¦ VISAGE・
— ❛❛ // ALBERT WESKER ¦ I'm not destroying the world, I'm saving it!・ 「 Musings」
— ❛❛ // ALBERT WESKER ¦ VISAGE・
— ❛❛ // LEON SCOTT KENNEDY ¦ A bit of advice, try using knives next time. ・ 「 Musings」
— ❛❛ // LEON SCOTT KENNEDY ¦ VISAGE・
— ❛❛ // AMICIA DE RUNE¦ stay with me and I'll be your protector・ 「 Musings」
— ❛❛ // AMICIA DE RUNE ¦ VISAGE・
— ❛❛ // ASHLEY GRAHAM & LEON SCOTT KENNEDY ¦DYNAMIC・ 「 FRIENDS」
— ❛❛ // COMMANDER SHEPARD¦ stay with me and I'll be your protector・ 「 Musings」
— ❛❛ // LARA CROFT¦The extraordinary is in what we do, not who we are.・ 「 Musings」
— ❛❛ // LYNA¦Protector of the Crystarium・ 「 Musings」
— ❛❛ // LYNA¦I will always be their light in the darkness・ 「 Threads」
— ❛❛ // LEON SCOTT KENNEDY ¦ This time, it can be different. It has to. ・ 「 Threads」
— ❛❛ // JILL VALENTINE ¦I Hope you know we had everything・ 「 Rouge verse」
— ❛❛ // LYSE HEXT ¦ whatever I chose to do from now on, I do as Lyse ・ 「 Threads」
— ❛❛ // LYSE HEXT ¦ Until we're strong enough to take back everything they stole! ・ 「 Musings」
— ❛❛ //JILL WARRICK ¦Moonlight Melodies ・ 「 Threads」
— ❛❛ //JILL WARRICK ¦Ice Queen with eyes filled with stars ・ 「 Musings」
— ❛❛ // JILL WARRICK ¦ VISAGE・
— ❛❛ //SADU DOTHARL ¦such a warrior within she will bask in my glorious flame.・ 「 Headcanons」
— ❛❛ //JULI KIDMAN ¦None of this is real, it's all Illusion・ 「 Musings」
— ❛❛ // JULI KIDMAN ¦ VISAGE・
— ❛❛ //JULI KIDMAN ¦No going back now..this is my choice・ 「 Threads」
— ❛❛ //RYNE WATERS ¦They're everything to me. All I have and all I need. ・ 「 Musings」
— ❛❛ //RYNE WATERS ¦I don't know about the world...but I never asked to be saved. ・ 「 Threads」
— ❛❛ //RYNE WATERS ¦I don't know about the world...but I never asked to be saved. ・ 「 Threads」
— ❛❛ //RYNE WATERS ¦However hard it gets, it's my life, and I want to live it on my own terms!・ 「 Headcanons」
— ❛❛ // RYNE WATERS ¦ VISAGE・
— ❛❛ //HILDA WARE ¦To be sure, our lives won't change overnight ・「 Musings」
— ❛❛ // HILDA WARE ¦ VISAGE・
— ❛❛ //ARDBERT HYLFYST ¦We were just adventurers trying to make our way.・「 Musings」
— ❛❛ // ARDBERT HYLFYST ¦ VISAGE・
— ❛❛ // LADY EXARCH ¦ The waves will break every chain on me ・ 「 Playlist」
— ❛❛ //YUGIRI MISTWALKER ¦To whom much is given, much is expected.・「 Threads」
— ❛❛ //Y'SHTOLA RHUL ¦So much left in the world to discover・「 Threads」
— ❛❛ //URIANGER AUGURELT ¦My path is unchanged; my creed sacrosanct. ・「 Threads」
— ❛❛ //ELLIE WILLIAMS ¦Everybody I have cared for has either died or left me.・「 Musings」
— ❛❛ //I'NEZY T'ZES ¦No matter how much time passed, I always remembered you・「Threads」
— ❛❛ //VENAT¦・Has your journey been good? Has it been worthwhile?・「Threads」
— ❛❛ // YSAYLE DANGOULAIN¦I am neither a saint nor a savior—just another sinner.・ 「 Threads」
#— ❛❛ // CRYSTAL FLOWERS¦Tags#These will be updated and expanded on the more I write on here#OathofPromises Tags
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