Me: Yo OP! Can I take a cracker please?!?

Optimus Prime: Sure thing lil one.

*I take 14 crackers in my hand*

Optimus Prime: YOU SAID CRACKER! NOT MULTIPLE “CRACKERS”!!!

Me: No- I said “Can I take a CRACKERS please” …

*Optimus throws me on the couch that is across the bass*

Me: *cough* Fu-Fuck you…

*Me dies*

Optimus Prime: Never mess with my crackers-

Repair day

gym stoner bf summer …

I’m really glad to see several groups from RT being able to rebrand (the new RT pod group making Midnight Snack, Face Jam becoming 100% Eat) so I really hope everyone else, on camera and behind the scenes, is able to swiftly move on to bigger and better things

This role-swap AU idea with S.T.A.R.S./Uroboros William makes me so feral argh T__T I want more captain Birkin, maybe I’ll draw him once again with S.T.A.R.S. outfit later

I started writing a whole essay thing on generational poverty and got the part where I was talking about how some mornings, as a kid, I only had a spoonful of cheap Parmesan or a squirt of old ketchup to eat because we didn’t have anything else until later in the day when the food banks opened and how I can’t really stomach Parmesan now even though sometimes that’s still all I have in my fridge in the morning and how the poverty never, ever gets better because all of these systems are structured to keep us here or kill us and I had to stop because there’s just no point in talking about it when nothing will ever change and everyone is either somewhere down here in the pit with me or they aren’t, and those who aren’t simply do not care about us.

a finished paintbrush holder commission!!

this piece took me a few months, due to an overabundance of caution, but all the care was worth it in the end!! it’s my biggest sculpture to date! around 18” long. my commissioner wanted blue and orange, and man i’m obsessed with how these glazes came out. very delicious

I’m sorry to have an influencer moment on here but I’m not lying when I say that these Tomato Cheddar Toasts from NYT cooking are hands down one of the best meals I have ever cooked for myself in my entire life (and I’ve been cooking daily for like 12 years lol) and they take like five minutes, most of which is spent waiting for the bread to toast. The recipe is paywalled so I’ll just say you take cheddar cheese and shred it on the tiniest side of your box grater/microplane, then mix together a 1:1 ratio of mayo and cheddar. Then when the bread is piping hot from being toasted you spread it on there (like a tbsp or two per bread) and the heat causes them to melt together into this insane creamy tangy spread. Then top with tomatoes and salt.

I have been eating tomato toasts almost every day this summer and I thought I had my formula down pat, but then I tried these and it changed my world. Genuinely a contender for last meal on earth if I had to choose. I have eaten it with every single meal since I got back from my backpacking trip except one bc I was invited to a potluck. I know my username might make you think I’m just overzealous but please for the love of god if you eat dairy and gluten and love tomatoes (and have access to some good ones) I am begging you to try this. On the left is the recipe pic and on the right is one of the ones I made. and like it doesn’t matter if no one tries this I just want this in my tomato tag to commemorate this unbelievable toast because I’m in a new era of my life for real

Ah, we finally have it. The holy Trinity of Doctor Who horror.

“Are you my mummy?”

“Hey, who turned out the lights?”

And now…

“My arms are too long.”

Though I’ll never forget the absolutely terrifying-

me after attempting to get back into sims and realizing i had a lot more to do than play the game

@anon-lemon with this ask and the resulting one shot: I also think freshwater merDrew is pretty hehe, the fish I based him off of is a peacock bass (maybe specifically royal peacock bass? With the more blue fin idk) but more dramatic. Like so:

(This is him in perfect nice lighting under shallow water probably but shh he’s beautiful)

Reference pictures I used under the cut

I love mixing and matching references. Idc what I heard growing up, life CAN be a buffet and I CAN a pick my favorite parts to mash together sometimes 😌

ok now I'm imagining kuukou hosting Hot Ones interviews with the rest of the hpmi cast

for reference, Hot Ones is a celebrity interview show where the guest has to answer questions while eating progressively hotter and hotter sauces on wings. It catches them off their gaurd a little bit and they respond more earnestly because their PR brain is off and all they can focus is on dying of spice and answering questions

Imagining him doing this to Jakurai in particular 🤣

KUUKOU WOULD HAVE A BLAST BEING THE HOT ONES HOST HE GETS TO EAT EXTREME FOOD AND LEARN ABOUT THE OTHERS WITHOUT SHARING SHIT ABOUT HIMSELF THATS HIS BRAND LOL

What sort of leg exercises do you do to develop your amazing ass? It’s a great piece of work.

You wanna know my secret?

I have a most speedy pupy who hits me with his leash whenever he wants 2 walkies…

you know its wrong. he knows its wrong. but its something about the wrongness of it all, the sneaking around, the secrets, the pleasure, that makes it all so worth it.

"Nurse, would you mind staying late again today? I'm going to need your help with pushing these records through to Kyoto." Doctor Getou informs you, as he peeks his head into the break room. you perk up instantly, already knowing the insinuation of his message that the other nurses clearly don't get.

"Of course, Doctor." you nod to him, meek, as if you were nervous to stay late around the very prestigious, very professional and non-rule breaking doctor. if only.

when he walks away, the nurses start to gossip, elbowing you in your side, telling you how lucky you are to be able to stare at him a little longer. that if they were in your shoes, they would do more than push records with him. that you should take the opportunity to at least let him kiss you, with tongue.

if only they knew that it was so much more than that.

"I think you like this," Getou says against your mouth, panting, his own smiling. but you can't seem to form enough thought to close your own, too focused on not sliding off of his desk that he's got you on right now. he fucks you on it hard enough that papers go flying, that his computer mouse is knocked on the floor, that the desk has scraped up the linoleum from the exertion.

"Ask me, nurse; what do I like?" Dr. Getou grabs your face in his hands when he realizes that you're too fucked out to really hear him. that's what two orgasms back to back will do to a person, especially without reprieve. he smacks your cheeks a few times, calling your name sweetly when it still doesn't bring you back down to earth.

"What," you swallow down the spit accumulated on your tongue. "What do I like, Dr. Getou?" he groans at the title, something you've discovered makes his cock twitch when he's inside of you. maybe its because you moan it so debauchedly in the late afternoons, and turn around in the morning and say it so sweetly in front of your coworkers, in front of your patients, in front of Dr. Gojo who still thinks he might have a chance with you.

"You like the secrecy of it all," he smiles, looking so composed save for the flush on his cheeks and the strand of hair that's fallen from his bun from fucking you against the wall earlier. "You like knowing something so painstakingly obvious, yet no one can even guess what goes on between us. You like looking so innocent and meek, even though your hole swallows me up, greedy, every time I call for you."

he sounds so cocky, so sure of himself, like you're some pet that comes crawling every time he places his palm out in front of you. you try to frown at him, to pout, but he fucks the expression right off until it melts into one of pure bliss.

"That's not true," you still try to fight back, despite the way your thighs wrap around his hips when he fakes like he's going to pull out. he fixes you with a knowing look, but doesn't stop, grabbing your chest in his hand, the other toying with your swollen clit.

"Don't try to deny it, sweetheart. This tells me everything I need to know." he says with another flick of your clit, cocky, grinning all the while. and even though you try to deny it again, Dr. Getou works your body the way he knows will bring you into a puddle of nothingness in only a matter of seconds. after all, the doctor always knows best.

So you know how in stories kids will hide the creature they found from their parents? Like “gotta hide and disguise the alien or mom will ground us!” Or “quick lil fairy, hide! We can’t let dad see you” Or “mom will freak out if she found out I was friends with a giant robot!” Etc etc. And I understand that it’s from the fear of getting in trouble over the littlest of things (god I can relate to that) but also if I had kids and found out they were hiding a whole ass person or mystical creature or giant or alien I’d be upset that they hid them from me but I would be SOOOOO excited to meet them. Like: “Hey son, I found an alien in your room. Are they your friend? Why haven’t you introduced me to them yet?” Or “You’ve been hiding a giant robot??? And you didn’t think I’d want to meet him?!?!?!? This is the best thing EVER!!” Or “sweetie…your telling me magic exists and you’ve known about it for a week now? This is awesome. Yes I’ll keep her a secret don’t worry, a friend of yours is a friend of mine.” Etc etc. just really supportive about this new wild friend they have. Imagine that though, imagine having a parent who would be chill about finding out about that you made friends with an alien, monster, superhero, robot, etc. I think that would be nice and I’d be that parent.

sooooo tired but today was worth it and so fun🥺 for the people that recognized me, ily ily ily!! for the people that were told to read 3tan… i sincerely hope you enjoy it!!🥳🍊