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mostlysignssomeportents · 3 years

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20 years a blogger

It's been twenty years, to the day, since I published my first blog-post.

I'm a blogger.

Blogging - publicly breaking down the things that seem significant, then synthesizing them in longer pieces - is the defining activity of my days.

https://boingboing.net/2001/01/13/hey-mark-made-me-a.html

Over the years, I've been lauded, threatened, sued (more than once). I've met many people who read my work and have made connections with many more whose work I wrote about. Combing through my old posts every morning is a journey through my intellectual development.

It's been almost exactly a year I left Boing Boing, after 19 years. It wasn't planned, and it wasn't fun, but it was definitely time. I still own a chunk of the business and wish them well. But after 19 years, it was time for a change.

A few weeks after I quit Boing Boing, I started a solo project. It's called Pluralistic: it's a blog that is published simultaneously on Twitter, Mastodon, Tumblr, a newsletter and the web. It's got no tracking or ads. Here's the very first edition:

https://pluralistic.net/2020/02/19/pluralist-19-feb-2020/

I don't often do "process posts" but this merits it. Here's how I built Pluralistic and here's how it works today, after nearly a year.

I get up at 5AM and make coffee. Then I sit down on the sofa and open a huge tab-group, and scroll through my RSS feeds using Newsblur.

I spend the next 1-2 hours winnowing through all the stuff that seems important. I have a chronic pain problem and I really shouldn't sit on the sofa for more than 10 minutes, so I use a timer and get up every 10 minutes and do one minute of physio.

After a couple hours, I'm left with 3-4 tabs that I want to write articles about that day. When I started writing Pluralistic, I had a text file on my desktop with some blank HTML I'd tinkered with to generate a layout; now I have an XML file (more on that later).

First I go through these tabs and think up metadata tags I want to use for each; I type these into the template using my text-editor (gedit), like this:

<xtags>

process, blogging, pluralistic, recursion, navel-gazing

</xtags>

Each post has its own little template. It needs an anchor tag (for this post, that's "hfbd"), a title ("20 years a blogger") and a slug ("Reflections on a lifetime of reflecting"). I fill these in for each post.

Then I come up with a graphic for each post: I've got a giant folder of public domain clip-art, and I'm good at using all the search tools for open-licensed art: the Library of Congress, Wikimedia, Creative Commons, Flickr Commons, and, ofc, Google Image Search.

I am neither an artist nor a shooper, but I've been editing clip art since I created pixel-art versions of the Frankie Goes to Hollywood glyphs using Bannermaker for the Apple //c in 1985 and printed them out on enough fan-fold paper to form a border around my bedroom.

As I create the graphics, I pre-compose Creative Commons attribution strings to go in the post; there's two versions, one for the blog/newsletter and one for Mastodon/Twitter/Tumblr. I compose these manually.

Here's a recent one:

Blog/Newsletter:

(<i>Image: <a href="https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:QAnon_in_red_shirt_(48555421111).jpg">Marc Nozell</a>, <a href="https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/2.0/deed.en">CC BY</a>, modified</i>)

Twitter/Masto/Tumblr:

Image: Marc Nozell (modified)

https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:QAnon_in_red_shirt_(48555421111).jpg

CC BY

https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/2.0/deed.en

This is purely manual work, but I've been composing these CC attribution strings since CC launched in 2003, and they're just muscle-memory now. Reflex.

These attribution strings, as well as anything else I'll need to go from Twitter to the web (for example, the names of people whose Twitter handles I use in posts, or images I drop in, go into the text file). Here's how the post looks at this point in the composition.

<hr>

<h1>20 years a blogger</h1><xtagline>Reflections on a lifetime of reflecting.</xtagline>

See that <img> tag in there for frnklogo.jpg? I snuck that in while I was composing this in Twitter. When I locate an image on the web I want to use in a post, I save it to a dir on my desktop that syncs every 60 seconds to the /images/ dir on my webserver.

As I save it, I copy the filename to my clipboard, flip over to gedit, and type in the <img> tag, pasting the filename. I've typed <img src="https://craphound.com/images/ CTRL-V"> tens of thousands of times - muscle memory.

Once the thread is complete, I copy each tweet back into gedit, tabbing back and forth, replacing Twitter handles and hashtags with non-Twitter versions, changing the ALL CAPS EMPHASIS to the extra-character-consuming *asterisk-bracketed emphasis*.

My composition is greatly aided both 20 years' worth of mnemonic slurry of semi-remembered posts and the ability to search memex.craphound.com (the site where I've mirrored all my Boing Boing posts) easily.

A huge, searchable database of decades of thoughts really simplifies the process of synthesis.

Next I port the posts to other media. I copy the headline and paste it into a new Tumblr compose tab, then import the image and tag the post "pluralistic."

Then I paste the text of the post into Tumblr and manually select, cut, and re-paste every URL in the post (because Tumblr's automatic URL-to-clickable-link tool's been broken for 10+ months).

Next I past the whole post into a Mastodon compose field. Working by trial and error, I cut it down to <500 characters, breaking at a para-break and putting the rest on my clipboard. I post, reply, and add the next item in the thread until it's all done.

*Then* I hit publish on my Twitter thread. Composing in Twitter is the most unforgiving medium I've ever worked in. You have to keep each stanza below 280 chars. You can't save a thread as a draft, so as you edit it, you have to pray your browser doesn't crash.

And once you hit publish, you can't edit it. Forever. So you want to publish Twitter threads LAST, because the process of mirroring them to Tumblr and Mastodon reveals typos and mistakes (but there's no way to save the thread while you work!).

Now I create a draft Wordpress post on pluralistic.net, and create a custom slug for the page (today's is "two-decades"). Saving the draft generates the URL for the page, which I add to the XML file.

Once all the day's posts are done, I make sure to credit all my sources in another part of that master XML file, and then I flip to the command line and run a bunch of python scripts that do MAGIC: formatting the master file as a newsletter, a blog post, and a master thread.

Those python scripts saved my ASS. For the first two months of Pluralistic, i did all the reformatting by hand. It was a lot of search-replace (I used a checklist) and I ALWAYS screwed it up and had to debug, sometimes taking hours.

Then, out of the blue, a reader - Loren Kohnfelder - wrote to me to point out bugs in the site's RSS. He offered to help with text automation and we embarked on a month of intensive back-and-forth as he wrote a custom suite for me.

Those programs take my XML file and spit out all the files I need to publish my site, newsletter and master thread (which I pin to my profile). They've saved me more time than I can say. I probably couldn't kept this up without Loren's generous help (thank you, Loren!).

I open up the output from the scripts in gedit. I paste the blog post into the Wordpress draft and copy-paste the metadata tags into WP's "tags" field. I preview the post, tweak as necessary, and publish.

(And now I write this, I realize I forgot to mention that while I'm doing the graphics, I also create a square header image that makes a grid-collage out of the day's post images, using the Gimp's "alignment" tool)

(because I'm composing this in Twitter, it would be a LOT of work to insert that information further up in the post, where it would make sense to have it - see what I mean about an unforgiving medium?)

(While I'm on the subject: putting the "add tweet to thread" and "publish the whole thread" buttons next to each other is a cruel joke that has caused me to repeatedly publish before I was done, and deleting a thread after you publish it is a nightmare)

Now I paste the newsletter file into a new mail message, address it to my Mailman server, and create a custom subject for the day, send it, open the Mailman admin interface in a browser, and approve the message.

Now it's time to create that anthology post you can see pinned to my Mastodon and Twitter accounts. Loren's script uses a template to produce all the tweets for the day, but it's not easy to get that pre-written thread into Twitter and Mastodon.

Part of the problem is that each day's Twitter master thread has a tweet with a link to the day's Mastodon master thread ("Are you trying to wean yourself off Big Tech? Follow these threads on the #fediverse at @[email protected]. Here's today's edition: LINK").

So the first order of business is to create the Mastodon thread, pin it, copy the link to it, and paste it into the template for the Twitter thread, then create and pin the Twitter thread.

Now it's time to get ready for tomorrow. I open up the master XML template file and overwrite my daily working file with its contents. I edit the file's header with tomorrow's date, trim away any "Upcoming appearances" that have gone by, etc.

Then I compose tomorrow's retrospective links. I open tabs for this day a year ago, 5 years ago, 10 years ago, 15 years ago, and (now) 20 years ago:

http://memex.craphound.com/2020/01/14

http://memex.craphound.com/2016/01/14

http://memex.craphound.com/2011/01/14

http://memex.craphound.com/2006/01/14

http://memex.craphound.com/2001/01/14

I go through each day, and open anything I want to republish in its own tab, then open the OP link in the next tab (finding it in the @internetarchive if necessary). Then I copy my original headline and the link to the article into tomorrow's XML file, like so:

#10yrsago Disney World’s awful Tiki Room catches fire <a href="https://thedisneyblog.com/2011/01/12/fire-reported-at-magic-kingdom-tiki-room/">https://thedisneyblog.com/2011/01/12/fire-reported-at-magic-kingdom-tiki-room/</a>

And NOW my day is done.

So, why do I do all this?

First and foremost, I do it for ME. The memex I've created by thinking about and then describing every interesting thing I've encountered is hugely important for how I understand the world. It's the raw material of every novel, article, story and speech I write.

And I do it for the causes I believe in. There's stuff in this world I want to change for the better. Explaining what I think is wrong, and how it can be improved, is the best way I know for nudging it in a direction I want to see it move.

The more people I reach, the more it moves.

When I left Boing Boing, I lost access to a freestanding way of communicating. Though I had popular Twitter and Tumblr accounts, they are at the mercy of giant companies with itchy banhammers and arbitrary moderation policies.

I'd long been a fan of the POSSE - Post Own Site, Share Everywhere - ethic, the idea that your work lives on platforms you control, but that it travels to meet your readers wherever they are.

Pluralistic posts start out as Twitter threads because that's the most constrained medium I work in, but their permalinks (each with multiple hidden messages in their slugs) are anchored to a server I control.

When my threads get popular, I make a point of appending the pluralistic.net permalink to them.

When I started blogging, 20 years ago, blogger.com had few amenities. None of the familiar utilities of today's media came with the package.

Back then, I'd manually create my headlines with <h2> tags. I'd manually create discussion links for each post on Quicktopic. I'd manually paste each post into a Yahoo Groups email. All the guff I do today to publish Pluralistic is, in some way, nothing new.

20 years in, blogging is still a curious mix of both technical, literary and graphic bodgery, with each day's work demanding the kind of technical minutuae we were told would disappear with WYSIWYG desktop publishing.

I grew up in the back-rooms of print shops where my dad and his friends published radical newspapers, laying out editions with a razor-blade and rubber cement on a light table. Today, I spend hours slicing up ASCII with a cursor.

I go through my old posts every day. I know that much - most? - of them are not for the ages. But some of them are good. Some, I think, are great. They define who I am. They're my outboard brain.

#pluralistic

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d4rk3stn1ght · 3 years

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Haunted Playmate

Happy Holidays @houser-of-stories ! I was also your gift giver for @sanderssidesgiftxchange and I hope you enjoy your gift

Ships: Platonic Prinxiety, mentioned Analogical and Royality

Warnings: Past character death, cursing, mentioned murder, not meant to be unsympathetic Remus but it kind of comes off that way, if there’s anything else needed to be tagged please tell me

There was a creak on the floor that hadn’t been there before. Was someone invading his home? Well, what was his home. He looked over the banister of the stairs to see a man unpacking his things in the house.“

“Well hello there.” Roman smiled and gently greeted the stranger. Logically, he knew that the man couldn’t hear him, but it was still polite. He had manners! He was a gentleman, thank you very much! Roman watched him from a bit afar. This man tended to talk to himself. Virgil? Was that his name? He mumbled it under his breath fairly often. Virgil flopped onto the couch with his phone, probably to order pizza. He would too if he were the one moving into be moving instead. He missed being able to eat and do things. Well, he could push things over but he couldn’t leave the house. Roman sighed softly before looking through the house to see what his new housemate had done with it. So far, he hadn’t gone up to the attic. If Roman had his way, he wouldn’t be able to.

Roman hums a gentle song as he peered into Virgil’s room. Oh! He had a Nightmare Before Christmas poster! Too bad Roman couldn’t borrow it or give him his own posters. His were taken as evidence or removed. It sucked but he understood why. He couldn’t exactly stop them anyway, not that he didn’t try. He shook his head at the memories the thought brought. He didn’t need to accidentally cause an inside storm again. It accidentally hurt a small child and he felt so bad for it even though he couldn’t help it. The room itself wasn’t that bad. Yeah, it was a bit dark and dreary, but there was some normalcy from his time. A string of lights to illuminate the room during the night (purple rather than a soft yellow), a corkboard for pictures or necklaces... The desk was cluttered with art supplies. Was he an artist? Did he have any sketches out? A glance over the desk confirmed that that’d be a no. Of course. Why would an emo have anything out in view that could hint at their past? They wouldn’t unless they trusted you. He knew that a bit too well. But ohoho, what’s this? There was a picture carefully placed on the desk with a number with hearts around it. Now that was interesting. Stormy knight had a crush? On this... Logan Omair? The teach? Too bad he couldn’t call that guy at the moment or he so would. He noticed a cup of pens a little too close to the edge and grinned. New game time. How long can he knock things over before the new guy noticed or left? He knocked over the pen cup and laughed at the sound of his new guest jumping up to look.

Roman left the room quickly and headed to the kitchen instead before Virgil could get there. He chuckles at him cursing at the mess but quickly pouts at there being nothing close enough for him to easily knock anything over. Well, he could always knock over the chairs. He froze though at the doorbell. That was really quick or he was losing time again. That tended to happen more recently but it doesn’t bother him as much anymore.

Virgil ran down the stairs and looked out the window before opening the door with an apology. Was he paranoid? Was he running from something? Was he a criminal?! He’d rather side with the law! Maybe he was just anxious. Who knew? Definitely not Roman. He probably never would. The dark and paranormal walked into the kitchen without looking in Roman’s direction. He grabbed two cups, one he set on the counter while he held the other to get ice and soda. Why did he need another cup? Virgil left the cup on the counter while taking his soda one to the couch. When he got comfortable he immediately swiped the cup off the counter before bolting again.

Virgil smirked at catching a glimpse of Roman’s retreating form, “Gotcha.” He was so glad he didn’t take out his glass cups. A after setting the pizza and the cup of soda down a safe distance from the edge, he got up to pick up the discarded cup and set it down on the edge of the end side table. “Try that one you overgrown cat.” He snarks but unpauses the show to finish it as he ate.

The ghost thought he was slick, didn’t he? Virgil knew about the haunted house rumors and was ready for anything. Well, as much as Supernatural taught and the limited research he had. While he hadn’t been there long, Virgil had already attempted salting the doorways and windows. He’d noticed a few things, too. The ghost could both float above and walk straight through it, so salt was a bust.The ghost seemed to only do anything when he wasn’t looking or not even in the room. He doesn’t know anything about him aside from him acting like a cat. It was kind of amusing but the pens were annoying. Empty Solo cup? No problem. A full cup and he’s just being a pain in the ass. Virgil took a deep breath before getting up and put the pizza box in the trash. He froze at the clatter of the cup but sighed in relief when there wasn’t a splash accompanied. Virgil mocked him slightly when he laughed. He was just thankful the ghost wasn’t hostile and was just being a bit playful. He settled into the couch again and sipped at his drink while spacing out in thought.

Meanwhile, Roman was snickering in what used to be his room. This was great! He was playing along. It was kinda disappointing that he wouldn’t put anything full against the edge anymore, but he understood anyway. Roman would feel the same way if roles were reversed, at least. He gently ran his hand across the wall. He knew feeling the paint was impossible, but that didn’t stop him from wanting to try. Roman missed his tangibility, but… nothing could undo what he did. Roman closed his eyes to get his bubbling anger under control. It’s not that Roman hated him, but he was still angry and understandably so. As justified as his anger was, the man downstairs didn’t deserve the backlash it would produce. When he had calmed some, he headed to the stairway to see the poor kid was passed out on the couch with his show running. It was kinda interesting but he couldn’t risk it yet. Maybe the next day but not right now. He nodded in the sleeping form’s direction before heading up to the attic. When he got up there he headed to check on his object. He knew where his body was, but that wasn’t what he was tied to. Instead, he was tied to his class ring from his senior class. He tended to wear it everywhere and it held most of his best memories. That’s why he never let anyone up in the attic. If they were to find it and destroy it, well... that would be it. He would be toast and no one would be able to know the truth. No one had tried to talk to him before but hopefully, Virgil would be the first if he so chose or if he could even hear and/or see him.

A few days later the game was still on. Random cups would fall and Virgil had yet to see anything more than a glimpse of the ghost and the sounds of laughter, followed quickly by a cup hitting the floor. That said, the ghost was getting a bit bolder. He would linger especially when Supernatural was on. Virgil could feel the drop in temperature but if he tried to look, the ghost wouldn’t be there. Virgil had done more research on the property and found a few different murders but he didn’t know which one this ghost was from. Tired of the cat and mouse, Virgil hatched a plan. He needed a job for money and, since this was his second rewatch of Supernatural, he could miss a few episodes of the show and be fine. , Virgil decided that was going to announce he was leaving and leave the show on for the ghost to watch. Then, hopefully, he’d come back from applications and finally see the ghost.

Virgil set his trap the next day, leaving and returning a few hours later. When he got back, he made sure to be quiet as he crept in. His eyes widened. Sitting cross-legged in front of the screen was none other than his ghostly roommate. Dressed in jeans and a white t-shirt, he looked a bit younger than Virgil. Unable to see much else from behind, Virgil slowly crept towards the ghost’s side to see any other features so he could compare them to the other murders on the property. Unfortunately, the episode started the credits and the ghost turned, making a shout of surprise and scrambling back,

The ghost almost looked panicked, “Um, hey! You’re back!”

Now that he was facing Virgil, he could see everything. The gold crown on the breast pocket, the line on his throat from where it had been slit, dull green eyes and tanned skin muted by death.

“You’re Roman!” Virgil exclaimed

“You can see me?!”

“Yes?!”

“That’s awesome!”

“No! Not awesome! I knew you!”

“You did?”

“Yes! Roman Kingston and Remus Kingston!”

“Highschool?”

“Yes. You kept making doll eyes at Patton Amato!”

“I did not! But, uh, uh how is he?”

“Frankly, weI haven’t talked much.”

“Who have you talked to?”

“Logan Omair, Remus, Janus,Remy... But I’ve only Remy and Logan recently.”

“Cool…” Roman slowly unfreezes and shifts to a more casual posture. “So, I saw your little love letter.”

“What?!” Virgil, who had been doing the same, tenses right back up.

“The number? You-!”

“No! Why you?!”

“No idea. You should ask Remus,” he spat bitterly.

“Right… The article said…” Virgil trailed off, rubbing his neck.

“Yeah.” Discomfort is plain as day on Roman’s face. “Let’s not… Anyway, why’d you move here out of anywhere.”

Virgil is glad to change the subject, “You know, settling down and-”

“It’s because Logan lives here, isn’t it.”

“Shut!” Virgil snaps as his face tints pink.

“So it is Logan! Hah!”

“I will kill you again, you ass!” Virgil lunges towards Roman.

“You caaaaan’t,” Roman sing- songs and laughs as he dodges Virgil’s fist

“Get back here!” Virgil chases Roman through the room, thoroughly annoyed by the fact Roman has more mobility.

“Nope! When’s your date?”

“Shut! Up!” He catches up and swings again, hitting nothing.

Roman just laughs at him, “Come oooon!”

“We aren’t dating!” Virgil flops down onto the couch in defeat.

“Not yet!” Roman teases.

“Not anytime soon!”

“Who says?”

“Both of us.”

“Why? You both liked each other in high school.” Roman also calms down a bit, sitting on the other end of the couch.

“Yeah, it’s been a little while.”

“Oh right.”

“Yeah. We said someday but for now, we’re just talking as friends and meeting up with anyone still in town.”

“Like?”

“Patton, Emile, Remus, each other.Remy will pop in someday soon.”

“What about Janus?”

Virgil shrugs, “I haven’t heard from him.”

“Ah.” Roman pauses a moment before speaking again. “When will you talk to Remus?”

“I’m going Wednesday.”

“Can you… can you ask him why for me?”

Virgil looks to Roman out of the corner of his eyes, “I can’t promise he’ll answer.”

Roman nods “...Right.”

“Yeah...” Virgil rubs the back of his neck, sensing Roman’s discomfort.

“Sooo... how’d job hunt go?”

“I’ve applied. They’ll call me to set up interviews.”

“Nice. By the way, what’s up with the emo aesthetic?”

“I told everyone it wasn’t a phase,” he jokes slightly.

“We didn’t think you were serious.”

“Dead serious,” Virgil grinned.

“You did not.”

He just burst out laughing.

“I can’t believe you did this to me! Me of all people! How dare you, sir!”

Virgil put an arm around his stomach as he kept laughing.

“You can’t be serious! No! Don’t answer that you dark fiend! I trusted you!”

He only seemed to laugh harder at his dramatics. Roman only pouted as Virgil slowly calmed down.

“You’re an ass.”

“You still love me platonically anyway,” Virgil teases.

“Sadly.”

He chuckles breathlessly,shakinghis head.

“Hey, did they ever find out why that band split up?”

“The one you listened to religiously in high school? No.”

“Damn. I enjoyed their music.”

Virgil shrugs, “I can play some for you.”

“You look like you know something.”

“Maybe, maybe not.”

“You tease! I can’t tell anyone!”

“I know,” *Virgil grins, “But this is more fun.”

“Asshole.”

“Nice to talk to you, jerk.”

“Bitch.”

“Ahhh, there he is.”

“What?”

“The prick of a prince.”

“Hey!”

“Hello.”

“Why must you be so rude to me?” Roman swoons back, the back of his hand against his forehead.

“No one else can.”

“Rude!”

“I’m not that rude.” Virgil rolls his eyes.

“Yes, you are!”

“Nope.”

“Yes.”

“Not arguing.”

“You’re boring.”

“To you.”

“Exactly.”

“Ah, there’s the brat.”

“So good to be back,” Roman said sarcastically but it soon just turned into them giggling.

“By the way...”

“Hm?”

“Don’t tip over anything full ever again.”

“No promises.”

Virgil looks pointedly at Roman, “Roman.”

With a mischevious grin, Roman turned and ran, phasing away through a wall.

“Roman get back here!” Virgil scrambled to chase after him.

This seemed like a great beginning to a new chapter of both of their lives. And what a wondrous start it was.

#platonic prinxiety #analogical #royality #roman sanders #virgil sanders #character death #d4rkwr1t3s #might make this into an ask blog #idk #we'll see #sorry its late btw

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supposed2bfunny · 5 years

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Unbound-a 2doc drabble

“Alright then?” 2D asks, sitting back on his haunches and looking down at Murdoc thoughtfully.

Murdoc smirks up at him, fingers flexing a little to gauge how tight the silk bonds are around his wrists. He still has a decent amount of mobility. Nothing hurts, circulation is not being interrupted. And it certainly isn’t the first time he’s been bound to the headboard of his bed by a lover. Absolutely no alarms are ringing in his head. “Perfectly comfy,” he assures. “Might even kip if you keep up the pace. Can you at least get your trousers off?”

“Oh, they’re not coming off,” 2D replies with a smile, settling down on Murdoc’s lap, looking content as can be. “But I knew you’d never agree to letting me do this unless I spiced it up, mentioned some bondage. You’re more predictable than you’d like to think, you old goth.”

For the first time, Murdoc feels himself start to tense under that stare. “Agree to let you do what, exactly?”

Relationships are not work. At least, they don’t really have to be. They are routine. You figure someone out, and then you follow the rules of that person’s mechanism, input the correct sort of dialogue at the correct moments, agitate when the situation calls for, and ultimately maintain or destroy the relationship according to how much money it can make you, or what drugs it can score you. Simple really.

His routine with 2D has been a complex one, evolving gradually but persistently over the years, requiring a lot of tweaking. First they were mates who occasionally snogged whenever they got high together (they smoked a lot of weed). Then they were fuck buddies. More recently, they’ve been treading into water that was warmer and much deeper than anything Murdoc is familiar with. And Murdoc has always been like a ship’s captain: at his most comfortable when he is in the water, but able to see land in the distance if he squints. 2D has gone from legal obligation to frontman to tempest so slowly that Murdoc didn’t see it coming until he’d been pulled in too deep, and now, wherever he strains to look, he can no longer spot land, only the phantom shadows of solid ground that turn out to be tricks of the eye.

“Hey, you with me?” 2D draws him out of his contemplation with soft, cool fingertips on his temple.

“Yeah, ‘course. Now what exactly do you want? How do you want me?”

“Well...” 2D blushes, tips his head at such an angle that, though the dark light of the bedroom obstructs any ability to see the rustbrown bloodstains in his eyes, Murdoc can intuit that he must be looking down, gaze snagging to the left, unable to look into the bassist’s face as he speaks. “Remember last week-”

“No.”

“Quiet! You bloody alcoholic. Remember last week, when we were listening to that bloke on that radio station who interviewed us a month ago?”

“That was Howard-fucking-Stern, you tit.”

“So you do remember,” he teases, smiling triumphantly, and again Murdoc is able to recognize that 2D’s eyes are focused on his face again, though he can’t quite make out how he knows it. “Anyway, he was saying how fun it was to interview you and Russel in August.”

“Yeah, so?”

“And then, he said how Russel was real easy to get along with, the kind of bloke you’d want to go out for a drink with after an interview.”

“Pretty sure he wouldn’t use the term ‘bloke,’ sunshine. American.”

“And he said that you were really fun to talk to too! He said that everyone has this image in their head of you as a jerk or a bad guy, but you’re really quite smart and funny. And he’d love to interview you, or have you co-host one of his shows sometime.”

“Right. This has been riveting. Now, about that kip-”

“When you and I heard him say that last week, say how he liked you, you got this weird look on your face. You said no one’d ever said such nice things about you so earnestly. And well, Muds. Well...i thought that that was rather, um, sad. So I kind of wanted to...uh, I just figured.”

Murdoc tips his head back and closes his eyes, pretending to doze off. 2D pinches his cheeks playfully, and though he keeps his eyes closed, he can hear the singer’s smile when he finally forces his words out:

“I was thinking I should say nice stuff to you. Only I figured you’d tell me to bugger off. So I made up a whole story about wanting to try something different, and using silk to tie you down and well...” his fingers go from pinching to stroking, and Murdoc opens his eyes, staring at the ceiling rather than at 2D. Think of swimming in the ocean. The shallow shelf is so often bigger than you’d expect it to be; you can walk out into the water for what seems like a quarter of a mile and still touch the bottom. And then, eventually you reach that point where you set your foot down to kick off, and you no longer find the bottom.

“Dents.”

“Murdoc,” it’s somewhere between begging and whining, his tone. “Let me do this, okay? Just give it a shot.”

“Happy ending included?”

He chuckles. “If that’s what you want.”

“I’m sure you can multi-task,” he assures, rolling his hips up just a bit to feel the singer’s weight on top of him. Neither of them is hard: they hadn’t gotten to the foreplay yet. At least, he’d assumed there would be foreplay. And sex. And not this pathetic, mushy, how-the-fuck-did-Howard-Stern-precipitate-this?

“Fine. Let’s start with the obvious: you’re really smart, and I love to listen to you talk about smart stuff.”

He snorts. Oh, this isn’t going to be sexy. But at least it will be funny.

“I mean it! Not when you’re faking. I know that you don’t really know anything about Korean fashion like you told Noodle you do yesterday, and I know that you don’t have a master’s in archeology.”

“You know that, and you still licked that rock we found behind Kong when I asked you to. Remarkable.”

“You’re smart about useful stuff. Like how you were saying that ‘Girl’ was such a revelation to listen to when you were young because Lennon was using his voice as an instrument, not just as a means of saying lyrics prettily.”

“He was also referencing weed, mate.” Murdoc makes a similar inhaling noise to the one John Lennon makes in the song, trying to get 2D to understand that it’s a joke about hitting a blunt, nothing clever about it, just silly. “This is the same song that uses the word ‘tit’ in the background. Just randy northerners being randy, having some fun.”

“You’re trying to play it off now, but they way you first described it to me, Muds. the way you described vocalizations as instrumentation, it was incredible. You’re so smart about music, about ways to get the best feedback when we’re recording, about why you prefer to play without a pick because you like the way the strings vibrate against the pads of your fingers even though it hurts just a bit since you play so much.”

He leans forward then, still cupping Murdoc’s face, but now he also kisses his forehead. “You’re also very talented. Y’know, I could see you having a million different jobs if rock star hadn’t worked out. Not that I’m not happy Gorillaz have made it big, but. Well, you’re so handy around Kong that sometimes I think you could start a business. Just figuring shit out for people, fixing their leaky pipes and getting their teles to play all the channels.”

“That’s what plumbers are for,” he mumbles as another kiss is pressed to his brow, then another to his temple. “And I only sorted out the problem with the TV because Noodle was badgering me about it and I couldn’t take it.”

“I’ve imagined you as the guy who plays piano during intermissions at plays and musicals, because I think you’d make the waiting time between performances fun for people. And I could also picture you as a model for art students: the sort who poses in all sorts of outfits, or nude, so they can learn anatomy.”

“You’ve fantasized about that? Maybe you’re kinkier’n I gave you credit for, Stu-pot.”

“And speaking of you modeling, you’re beautiful to me, Murdoc. I love how sharp your collarbone is, and how elegant your fingers are, even when you’re just relaxing, your hands always look so delicate. I like the way you tend to look at things out of the corner of your eye when you’re trying to act disinterested; you don’t move your head, but your eyes flicker. And I love the little canine tooth on the left corner of your mouth, cuz it’s turned out a bit and it looks sharp, like a fang.”

“Right.”

“I’m serious-”

“No, I mean it’s my right canine tooth. Your left, my right.”

“Oh, yeah. Oops,” he loses his concentration for just a moment, glances at Murodc’s mouth, and the bassist obliges, opening his mouth to reveal his sharp tooth. “There it is! Also, I wasn’t done.”

“Stu, you don’t have to do this.” By which he means he’s not sure if he can take more of this. This is way off of their routine banter. This is meaningful. And Murdoc has always considered himself too nihilistic to handle meaningful things.

“You agreed to this,” he replies. “You’re bound and you’re not getting away from me, Murdoc.”

He looms over him, and for a brief instant, Murdoc thinks, I’m drowning. But then, 2D’s mouth is on his, and he’s not thinking anything other than don’t stop kissing me, you feel so good.

“So where was I?,” he asks, and he begins to talk and he kisses Murdoc’s neck, his chest, strokes his hair soothingly. “Oh yeah, I like the way you look when you smoke, when you’re really lost in a story and your cigarette is burning down to ash and you don’t even notice because you’re so caught up talking, the way it dangles from your fingers. You’re good to me in ways no one else is. Like, you don’t ever make fun of me when you tie my shoes for me, but you also don’t make me feel like a baby for needing your help. Whenever we’re out shopping, you always pick up the candy I like, and you don’t yell at me when I eat the whole bag in one sitting, even though I get an upset stomach after. And I love how, when you pull me onto your lap, you tap your fingers against my waist like you’re keeping time to a tune. Like holding me close is a kind of song for you.”

2D’s hands have begun to travel down Murdoc’s face, along the column of his throat, over his ribs. The touch isn’t particularly sensual; it’s more grounding than anything else. He’s tempted to tell 2D that holding him is a song. He’s not stupid enough to actually say that out loud.

“You already know that I love you. And even though you can be a real hemorrhoid, you’re also the most interesting person I’ve ever dated.”

“Aw, Stu, we’re dating? I had no idea, congratulations.” Deflect. Deflect the warmth flooding into his chest with humor while there’s still room for coherent thought. He’s taking on way too much emotion. When you’re out this deep, so far from shore, it’s often too late by the time you realize that there’s a problem.

“I wanted to tie you down so you wouldn’t be able to run away or touch me to distract me. I wanted to have you here, at my mercy, Murdoc. To tell you that I love you more than I think I’ve ever loved anything, and that’s really scary. It’s also kind of beautiful. Just like you. You can be scary, but also so lovely to anyone who knows how to look at you,” he leans in again, presses their foreheads together, closes his eyes for a few beats. He opens them, and Murdoc can see only endless black. He should be terrified. Instead, he tilts his head up, tentatively asks for a kiss. 2D obliges, hands sliding down his body further, to settle on his hips, to anchor him here in this jet-black depth.

“You’re saying you know how to look at me.”

“Yeah.”

“You, and Howard Stern both.”

It takes hims him a moment, and then he’s laughing. “You can’t be serious for five minutes, can you?”

“Dents, this is a lot to take in. Do you think we can do other stuff while you tell me all this so I don’t have to process it all right this second?”

“I don’t want this to be about sex, Murdoc,” he argues, looking hurt. “I want it to be about you understanding what you mean to me, all the things I love about you.”

“Yeah, I bloody well got that,” he replies. “But this is a little much for me. Maybe if you give me some distraction, I can take this all in now, and process it a little later?” He squirms a bit, feeling vulnerable for the first time. Strange, since he had no problem lying down on his back when he was certain he was going to be stripped of his clothes.

2D mulls this idea over, then ultimately nods. “You promise you’re listening though? If I touch you, you’ll still hear what I’m saying?”

He meets his lover’s gaze without hesitating. “No one has ever complimented my collarbone before, you know.”

2D smiles and leans close for another kiss. “You have been paying attention.” Another kiss. “Okay, as long as you keep that up. Should I untie the bonds?”

“Nah, leave ‘em. I like to be tied up. I’ve got just one request before we continue.”

2D’s hands pause over Murdoc’s belt buckle. “Anything, Murdoc.”

“Maybe some day, when I’m there mentally, you’ll let me do this for you in return?”

The singer’s smile is daybreak after a storm. “I’d really like that, yeah.”

“Good,” he replies, closing his eyes, letting his head fall back, and enjoying the familiar slide of his belt being pulled from his trousers. “I think I would too. Now tell me how much you love my singing voice; say that I’m a better vocalist than you.”

“Now you’re really pushing your luck, Niccals.”

Relationships are not work, they are routine. There is ebb and flow to them. 2D has never been predictable, practicable. The thrill of being pulled out into deeper waters, once nerve-wracking, has become a hobby for Murdoc. He cannot feel the shore beneath his feet. There are black eyes above him, watching him take on this mysterious romance till he begins to sink. He’s learned to trust that once he slips under, he will not forget how to breathe. Instead, he will find a world below the surface that looks similar to the one he left behind on land. Similar, but safer somehow, protected by roiling waves above and currents that know where to go. A turquoise-hued utopia. All he has to do is let go. And some day, he certainly will.

#2doc #2doc fanfiction #just a lil drabble cuz i miss these two a lot today #beck's fics

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wordstrings · 4 years

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Inbox dump

(brace yourselves, I’m including the timestamps because these have been sitting forever and you may literally forget ever having sent one of these because they’re from so long ago 😬)

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Anonymous said: March 11th 2014 *Clears throat* Non-canon verse, uni AU probably *strums guitar and takes a deep breath* DUEEEEE TO A COMPUTING errORRR, dean and gabe are stuck as roomatesssssssss, whilesamandcascanbestucktogethertoo that'snotaneccesitybutitwouldbegreaaaaaaaaattttttttt, and veeery soon it turns into something of a friendship BUT THEEEENNNN dean fights with saaAAAM and gabe is like "dude stop being so upset" aND FLUFF HAPPEeeeeeEEEEEEeens! *stands up and bows* tyvm for accepting debriel though like omg <3

I’ve been rewatching some of Supernatural seasons 5 and 6 this past weekend, and it reminded me how much I love and miss Gabriel. I still maintain that Debriel is a super-underrated ship. The manic-chaos potential is *muah*. (see: #Debriel)

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Anonymous said: August 7th 2018 psst... light back tickles while cuddling in bed are pure™ and wholesome™

Good shit good shit good shit

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Anonymous said: September 19th 2018 I love science and go to public seminars as often as I can. I walked in to the most recent one (which I had picked at random), and it was on the science of tickling. There were demonstrations. There were hand gestures and finger wiggling. There were in depth descriptions of the anatomy and physiology behind ticklish spots. It was legitimately your Amateur Production’s fic, and I was Kevin. Worst of all it was 2 hours long. I think I died during it and my soul was sucked into hell.

Uhhhhhh where can I get a copy of the slide deck?? Asking for a friend. (see: #series: Amateur Production)

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Anonymous said: September 23rd 2018 your art skills have me shook in the best possible way

aaaahh thank you! Fun fact: I went to art school and even took illustration as a concentration area but I’ve hardly drawn anything for like ten years. When I do draw, it’s usually because there are feelings that I don’t wanna do words about. (see: #strings does art)

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Halo!anon said: September 27th 2018 A small, sinful part of Castiel had the urge to gloat. It was somewhat dampened by the fact that Dean was still under the impression that being abducted is peak romance."I can't believe you went out of your way to set up our second date!" He'd squealed, as Castiel tightened his restraints. - little excerpt of a sequel to Date Nights with Demons i had planned for months but abandoned. halo!anon

Your demented version of Demon!Dean is so entertaining 😄 (see: Date Nights with Demons)

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Anonymous said: November 6th 2018 Aaaaah your Gabriel / Kali drabble was adorable, I can't help but love seeing our mighty archangel reduced to a mass of giggles, and you write Gabriel so so well <3. I love your writing your stories always brighten my day ^^

It’s so rare for him to let his guard down, isn’t it? But when he does, he has a grand old time of it. :) (see: this drabble)

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sarah-lou-who said: November 8th 2018 1/4 Boo! The ghost of my online presence in the community is peeking its head in because I need help. I don’t have a platform or following to sound an alarm, so I’m using my platonic tumblr wife’s platform and following for me, because that’s what platonic tumblr wives do. Right? Anyway, I’m very actively fixated on Attack on Titan atm. You know this very well. You also know my predicament. I seem to have exhausted the entire supply of tickly AoT content I’m interested in that exists currently. 2/4 So, if you’re willing to publish these for me, I’m crying out into the vast TFB lands hoping that there’s someone out there to answer the call. I am in desperate need of tickly AoT content. I don’t know if anyone around here writes for it much these days. I haven’t found anyone. And I know beggars can’t be choosers, but it can’t be helped; I really only care if Eren is involved. Even better would be Levi, but I haven’t found ANYTHING involving him, so I feel like asking for that is futile. 3/4 I digress. Even after all this time I can’t keep my asks less than 50 parts long. So my goal here is that someone, somewhere, will by chance come across these, and be able and willing to either write fic of the tickly variety for Eren and/or Levi from Attack on Titan, or direct me to someone who can, if they know a person who knows a person who knows a person. (Sidenote, hi anyone who still remembers me! It’s Sarah, the more ticklish half of Leerah. I’m doing good and I miss you!) 4/4 (I hope you’re all doing well!) Thank you for letting me take advantage of your devoted followers, Strings! Love yaaa!!!

Ah, my platonic tumblr wife Sarah returns! (Digitally, anyway. Reality-wise, we hang out all the time and it’s probably very rude of me to have not published this ask for so long!) I keep teasing her that she has a Type, and that is dark-haired sulky badass who’d probably make a wicked ‘ler – AoT Levi, SPN Cas, FMA Roy, etc. So anyway, if anyone knows of somewhere I can point her to find the content she’s (still) craving, lmk!

Anonymous said: October 23rd 2019 I’m sorry if this is invasive in any way, but how is Sarah doing? I’ve been absent from Tumblr for a couple years and I see that her blog is now deactivated. I was just wondering if she’s doing alright and if she’s still around here on a different blog maybe?

See above! She doesn’t have a TFB community blog anymore, but she’s doing well. We’re quarantine buddies and helping each other out a lot. Very kind of you to ask! <3

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Anonymous said: December 2nd 2018 Hi, sorry to bother you but do you know what happened to prodigal-anon’s blog? It seems to have been deleted. Sorry again if you’ve been asked this before

No worries, friend! Here’s an answer for you!

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Anonymous said: December 13th 2018 I LOVE THE LOOPY SERIES! I love it so much, is there any chance you’ll be doing a part four? I’d give anything to see Cas and Dean tickle each other, it would be so cute 😍

Despite all evidence to the contrary, I haven’t entirely stopped writing... and Loopy 4 is one of those unfinished pieces that has seen a few additions lately. :) I’ve learned not to make promises about when something might get finished and posted, but I genuinely do believe this may be one of the first things that shows up once I’m ‘back in the game.’ Stay tuned... (see: #series: Loopy)

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Anonymous said: January 1st 2019 No no no you can't just stop there! I need more fluffy destiel with tickles and kissing! Pretty please?

I believe this is in response to Wonder whose arms will hold you good and tight. Don’t you worry, anon – Dean and Cas are not done being fluffy on this blog!

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1832wasalongtimeago said: January 25th 2019 Hi I just wanted to pop in and say the Maintenance series is amazing!! The second part was doing things to my poor heart I’ve read it like 5 times already. You’re such an amazing writer and thank you fo writing for us!

I’m very flattered, but I can’t take credit for the Of Maintenance series – that’s the lovely work of ask-flip-frost! It does things to my poor heart, too, so you’re in good company. :)

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Anonymous said: January 26th 2019 Sam Winchester can take a lot of things. The one thing he CAN'T take? Someone using baby talk on him when he's being tickled. He collapses into a puddle of helpless giggles faster than a house of cards in a stiff wind.

Precious Sammy just needs to laugh and be held, doesn’t he? <3

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Anonymous said: May 17th 2019 Thor needs tickles. So. Damn. Much.

Oh this was from right after Endgame came out. Thor did make me feel some sads there. :( Poor bab.

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Anonymous said: July 25th 2019 hi! i’ve read your wonderful fics forever but i’ve never really sent anything like this before so i don’t really know what to say.. but i had a destiel tickly thought and really wanted to share it with somebody, so here goes i guess- dean is taking too long in the shower so cas decides to use his mojo from the other room to speed things along. and listens to dean’s echoey laughs through the door. that’s all. sorry if this is weird! okay bye have a good one

This is not weird and I may have delayed in telling you any of my feelings about it but I definitely have a doc somewhere that has some vague notes about how I’d like to write this because I like it!

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Anonymous said: August 6th 2019 Anhhgff your Good Omens tword fics are so cute snvfddf i never knew I needed that of my favorite husbands till now😳😍

I know, right?! They’re just dying to be dropped into every fluffy situation. (see: #Good Omens)

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Anonymous said: July 25th 2019 Poking my head in to say hello, hope you’re doing well still! I just got into Good Omens and I absolutely loved your fic! (I watched the show first because my book was taking too long in the mail lol) Also, the other week I somehow talked myself into making a tfb blog, after all these years of almost doing so before chickening out (this ask isn’t from it because I just hopped in here briefly in a private phone browser to say hi, it’s literally just august-anon though) ~August!Anon

August!anon, I’m always so happy to see you stop by! Tagging your (not-so-new anymore) blog so everyone can check you out: @august-anon

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hey-teenblog said: August 4th 2019 I love your fanfiction very much! They give me a lot of pleasant emotions. And most importantly, they, saturated with tenderness and love, gave me to accept myself as lee!! sorry for my english, i'm russian Love you 😘❤️

I will never tire of hearing things like this! Thank you for telling me. “Saturated with tenderness and love” is a such wonderful compliment about my writing – thank you very much! No need to apologize for language differences; I’m always impressed with anyone who manages to pick up English because it’s bonkers.

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Anonymous said: August 23rd 2019 Hi! Just found this blog and wondering some basic info. ** What fandoms do toy write for? ** Do you accept prompts? ** Do you write reader insert fics? Thank you lovley ❤️

Anonymous said: August 29th 2019 Do you write tickle fics for bnha?? Asking for a friend 👀👀

The only fandoms I have reliably been able to write for are Supernatural and Good Omens – but even Good Omens is a rookie player here. Supernatural is my main jam, and Destiel is my favorite flavor. I don’t do reader inserts, but I’m always “accepting” prompts. I just haven’t written many of them for quite a long time now, so you’re welcome to drop them as long as you’re okay with them collecting dust. (see: this selfsame post)

My About/FAQ page is very dusty right now, too, but there might be some useful tidbits in there for you.

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Anonymous said: November 12th 2019 okayokayokay. Have you watched Lucifer? It's on netflix, it's great, so much emotions and pining. (Also, y'know, reg. Luci stuff. He runs a club. Bad jokes. It's great.)

I haven’t, but it’s on my Netflix watchlist, so I’ll get there eventually! I saw a gifset once where he actually did the thing I see in winged fanfic all the time, where there was gunfire and he sheltered someone he cared about with his manifested wings. And honestly, that was the deciding factor for me.

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Anonymous said: November 16th 2019 Oh Man U listen to Critrole as well! Nice! Campaign 1 was awesome but also heartfelt and really gut-punching at points. Who is your fav so far, anyone you aren’t fond of? (& Out of interest do you have any tickle related thoughts on the main crew or upcoming Fics we can look out for? As you said it’s tumbleweeds out here for this fandom’s tickles and I’ll take anything really 😂!) Hope u enjoy!!!!!

It’s STILL tumbleweeds out here and it’s making me crazy! My heart belongs to Vax primarily, Percy secondarily. I don’t really have cohesive thoughts or headcanons about anything, unfortunately. I do have this one mental picture that keeps coming up that I keep wanting to see art of (who knows, maybe I’ll commission somebody someday?) – of ridiculous brute Grog just lifting Vax straight up in his arms and gettin’ wiggly with his fingers while all Vax can do is laugh and pry and kick while absolutely nobody helps him.

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Regarding #series: Accessor:

Anonymous said: August 31st 2015 I would like to see accessor!verse cas using feathers on Dean!!! and NIBBLES and RASPBERRIES and TEETH and TONGUE and WOWWWWWW

ME TOO, FRIEND. It’s been aaaaages since I published anything new for the Accessor AU, but that doesn’t mean I haven’t been going back to my unfinished docs every once in a while to add a few lines here and there. ;)

Anonymous said: October 29th 2016 Prompt: Cas is put in charge of getting a treaty with a neighboring country that shares a lot of the same customs, including Accessories, with certain... twists (think Bracelets AU) and treats their personal slaves (like Accessories) like people (listening to opinions, giving proper care, etc.). The foreign diplomats keep bringing that up and talking to Dean. Cas isn't sure he can make it though the diplomatic proceedings. Also, he might be having improper thoughts about that custom and Dean...

I’m posting this here, but I’m definitely keeping this filed elsewhere because it’s FANTASTIC.

Halo!anon submitted: June 4th 2018 I can’t help but imagine how tickling must play a part in other aspects of society in the accessor ‘verse, besides the sessions between master and accessory. So here’s some imagines and headcanons, with a touch of worldbuilding. (Warnings, besides the usual for this AU: death mention, reference to past trauma.)

- Among the high class, during parties and other celebrations, it’s seen as a common courtesy to string up one’s personal accessory in the center of the room and let the guests entertain themselves with them. Lord Castiel never does this with Dean, much to his fellow nobles’ disappointment; the mere suggestion had Dean quaking as things he’d rather forget came back to bite him.

- Every so often, a petty criminal(the poor man’s accessory, if you will) is placed in stocks in a small town’s square and left at the mercy of the very people they used to menace. What happens next usually involves honey, some sheep, and plenty of begging. A guard stands by to warn people, “No hurting, only tickling. Everyone please wait your turn, they’re not going anywhere any time soon.”

- Certain monastic healers perform tickle therapy as a treatment for anxiety, stress, and other “diseases of the soul”, as they call them. Balthazar himself proposed the idea, because of course he did. The rich usually indulge in this kind of therapy secretly, due to its undignified nature. Some contemplate the possibility of training accessories to tickle in the future, but it’s still a big taboo.

- Every town has a folktale about a tickle monster. Curiously, many of them involve controlling plants and attacking through dreams. The southern communities still have a giggle remembering that one time six years ago when Michael offered to hunt down one such monster and came back with Crowley, a sleazy drunkard with a fetish and a dream, sitting in a cage and wearing a mask.

- The Masters sisters, Lillith, Meg and Ruby, have a long history with law enforcement. Their favorite pastime is snatching unlucky merchants off the roads and tickling them into coughing up everything they have. Everyone is sure they had a hand in Fergus"Crowley" Macleod’s untimely demise by ferocious attack hounds, but they’re very good at covering their tracks. They’ll help you cover up your tracks too, if you’re a friend- ask Bela Talbot.

I might make a second part if I get any more ideas. I hope you enjoyed this! -Halo!anon.

I am very fond of you indeed, Halo!anon. These are so creative!

hypahticklish submitted: July 24th 2018 Accessor!Ideas:

~ Gabriel leads a furious rant regarding Prince Lucifer/Sam to Castiel, relating back to perhaps dealings he has directly had with the Prince between their two unstable-yet-truced Kingdoms. Castiel relates with similar views shared by Gehenna’s councilor(s).

~ Dean and Sam BM where the audience learns more about their homevillage. Dean starts it after a rather morose remark from Sam and ends with Sammy smiling and stealing my heart.

~ Balthazar helps Sam in several ways: 1) Learns the Sam was originally a psuedo-Advocates apprentice, as well as herbalist nephew when Sam identifies the components to some salves/medicines he’s making (he had been explaining what he was doing in an attempt to spare himself being attacked like the first couple times) 2) Calls Sam out on being intelligent and making a recklessly stupid choice by selling himself to find Dean. 3) Removes Lucifers mark. And maybe perhaps: 4) Allows Sam to assist in his own healing/medicine making under his careful observation, feigned as needing two sets of hands to do correctly and his assistant was running an errand, to assess his skills. 5) Offer he work in the hospice under him, apprenticing, should Gabriel allow his intelligence not go to waste. It’s not what Sam really wants to do/learn, but it’s better than doing nothing.

~Dean officially thanks Castiel for saving Sam. I’m talking full feels, single man tear sorta thing. And Castiel says “there was never another option” and then its schmoopy sweet with the kisses and the tickles and the Cas saying he loves Dean back!!!!!!!! swoon.

~ Kali!Likes!Sam’s!Spirit! Give me a dinner scene with Gabriel, Kali and Sam where hes holding his own in a diplomatic conversation with them when he nearly crosses a line (maybe something classist? Making it clear that Cas and Gabe are the exception to his experiences) and she says “I like this ones fire. He reminds me of you, my love.” *grabby hands*

~ Prince Lucifer sends a message to Gabriel requesting (threatening) his Helpmate be returned to him for a handsome reward. Sam somehow sees letter and gets spooked because DRAMA. Gabriel responds to Lucifer with the Chief Advocate equivalent of “Fuck Off”

You, my friend. YOU. All these feelings about Sam? Top-notch, and I shall be borrowing them, yes I shall.

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Regarding #android!Cas:

hypahticklish said: January 23rd 2016 Android!Cas deciding today is the DAY. Dean has been teasing him lately that he likes these strange sensations that have him using all his back-up generated power to not accidentally break Dean's bones and challenging him with that cocky smirk and relaxed confidence. Android!Cas practicing during time while Dean rests with holding objects with similar density to the human wrists with enough gentle force that they neither fracture or slip from his grasp. Android!Cas surprising Dean by turning the tables and pinning his wrists over his head while settling himself on Dean's thighs. Android!Cas not necessarily tickling at first so much as just touching like he had been wanting to so as to catalog how his best friend feels with his new technology. Android!Cas feeling that bubble of FEELS in his chest as he listens to Dean swear at him with positive physical actions negating his harsh words, growing more amused as the bubbling giggles begin. I love Android!Cas

Anonymous said: January 23rd 2016 Android!Cas figures out his own strength comes in handy for more than just retaining himself during tickle fights. When he surprises Dean, Dean tends to squirm and fight back a little (even though he told Cas to get him back as part of the experience), so Cas uses his strength to gently hold Dean down while ticking him. Dean's never been held immobile before so it's a new experience for him, but he ends up liking it. Cas notices how Dean relaxes into his hold after a minute or so. Cas doesn't fail to use this knowledge about Dean, coming up with teasing words and methods of ticking to make Dean all squirmy and giggly, taking special notice of how light tickles effect Dean even more than most other touches, using that specially designed soft brush meant to gently clean Cas' delicate computer chips.

Anonymous said: February 17th 2016 I'm joining in on the Android!Cas thing, if not too late. Perhaps Android!Cas has detachable parts, like a foot, and Dean is a jerk and runs off and hides with it all the while tickling it and making fun of Android!Cas's increasingly desperate attempts to get it back.

Y’all, careful deliberate curious determined ‘ler Cas is LIFE. And, reserved confused helpless adorable ‘lee Cas is also life. Detachable and extensible parts are probably key to both of these things.

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Regarding current personal circumstances:

Anonymous said: January 14th 2020 I pray that you’re able to find peace during this difficult time. You are loved more than you will ever know. I know it’s hard to believe, but there will come a time that you are thankful for this experience, because it will have turned you into the person you are truly meant to be. Be strong and be hopeful. Keep your faith and keep knowing that you are going to be okay. Don’t let this dark time destroy the magnificent light inside of you. Sending you so much love

Anonymous said: January 17th 2020 I’m so sorry you’re struggling. Hang in there! We’re all here for you!

Anonymous said: February 11th 2020 all my love, thoughts and prayers are going towards you right now. also wanted to just drop a little thank you note in your inbox for all the light and joy i've found in your fics over the years. im sitting half way through my first year at uni currently but ive been a fan of yours since early highschool and i feel like ive almost grown up with your writing and fanfics in a strange way, so thank you so much for that. sending all my love to you once again- you are so strong x

I love you all so much.

#blog maintenance #ask #you people are too kind #prompt #Accessor 'verse #android!Cas

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letterboxd · 4 years

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How I Letterboxd #2: Dave Chen

In our second of this series, we put Dave Chen in the Letterboxd spotlight. The podcaster, musician and filmmaker is most famous on Letterboxd for his weirdly specific lists. He tells us how he uses the platform, why every film that exists is miraculous, and why we shouldn’t sleep on Not Another Teen Movie.

Hi Dave! How long have you been on Letterboxd? About eight years. I believe I first signed up when it was in beta. I loved (and still love) the interface: how smooth the user flow is for logging/reviewing films, and how beautiful all that movie art looks as it’s organized on the site.

What do you mainly use Letterboxd for? I love reading the reviews on Letterboxd. On a film’s page, the site surfaces many of the most popular reviews and I find it’s a great way to find some quick, witty, and thoughtful comments on something I might be considering watching. But of course, I also love reading and making funny lists. Finally, I’ve heard Letterboxd is great for keeping track of films at a film festival but sadly I haven’t yet attended one since I started using it again.

Do you rate films? Would you consider yourself a generous or harsh rater? I rate films to remind myself how I felt about them at the time I watched. Of course, my opinions on movies change but it’s sometimes interesting to look back and think back to a time when, “Oh right, I did love that movie in the summer of 2019 when I was going through XYZ”. Our feelings about movies can often reflect what’s going on in our lives.

That said, over time, I’ve come to understand that films are miracles. I don’t think I’m the first person to come up with this observation but they are like miniature plays resulting from the collective work of hundreds or thousands of people that have been preserved for your amusement, and you can just play them on demand. Many of them cost only a few dollars. Some are free! Every film that exists is miraculous.

So, despite some of my harsh reviews, I do try to keep that perspective in mind.

You’ve been a member for a while but most of your reviews are recent. What brought you back? We note that you restarted with your third viewing of 1917! I am pretty active on Twitter and I started seeing a bunch of screen-capped reviews go viral there. But to be honest, much of social media can be exhausting to me these days. What I realized recently about Letterboxd was that much of it is free of the negativity. It’s just a bunch of folks who love movies sharing thoughts on those movies, but it also feels like a real community of people. There are filmmakers on there who share their thoughts on films and their favorites, and that’s of course endlessly fascinating (such as Sean Baker). Even the negative reviews can be fun to read. There’s a lot of pithiness and wit on the site, and its design really helps facilitate that.

Okay, take us way back, what was the film that got you hooked on cinema? My first cinematic true loves were the films of John Woo. I’d watched action movies before but I was introduced to John Woo ironically by a counselor at my church youth group! I became dazzled by movies like The Killer and Hard Boiled. It was then that I realized that things I had seen dozens of times (e.g., a shootout in a warehouse) could be elevated by sheer craftsmanship.

What keeps you from sharing your four favorites on your profile? A few reasons. For me personally, it takes months if not years for my thoughts on a film to really crystallize. My relationship with a movie doesn’t end when the credits roll—its ideas and themes and images are often clanging around in the back of my head for months if not years afterwards. As a result, my favorite films of all time change pretty frequently and I didn’t want to have to think about maintaining my four favorites over time.

Michael Caine in Alfonso Cuarón’s ‘Children of Men’ (2006).

Is there any film you could say is your all-time number one? If I had to name one though, it’d probably be Children of Men. It combines all my favorite things into one movie: science fiction, action, Michael Caine and a heartfelt message about how humanity has to be kinder to one another if we are to survive the challenging days ahead.

Your most popular lists are weirdly specific and fun (but true!). What are some other weirdly specific lists on Letterboxd that spoke to you? All the lists I like fall into that category. I love it when people make connections that I never otherwise would’ve thought of. To make a funny list, I think you need to be able to juggle extremely specific pattern recognition with a description that makes people feel like they are learning something about the films or their subjects. While the vast majority of the time these are just for fun, sometimes they actually can lead to insights about filmmakers, actors and the specific themes they try to bring to life in their work.

Also, shout out to Thijs Meuwese, who is leading the way on creative lists.

What is your favorite or most useful feature on Letterboxd? The Stats page [generated for all Pro and Patron members] is a beautiful visualization of the history of my film watching. As I continue to build out my watch history, I’m curious to see the trends that will arise.

What’s a movie where you don’t understand why Letterboxd members love or hate it so much? To answer this question, I took a look at some “worst-rated films on Letterboxd” lists and here’s a totally random one for you: the teen romantic comedy parody Not Another Teen Movie. It’s rated a 2.6 and a lot of the humor of this film has aged poorly but there are some amazing gags in here and it features Chris Evans in a performance that will likely be the apex of the comedic phase of his career. My brother and I still quote this movie to each other. Don’t sleep on it.

Chyler Leigh and Chris Evans in ‘Not Another Teen Movie’ (2001).

Your feature film, Stephen Tobolowsky’s one-man show The Primary Instinct, has a Letterboxd page and a pretty solid rating, congrats! How do you feel having that livestream of instant reactions to it? I’m glad that the ratings are decent, but to be honest, I can’t bring myself to look at them! As part of the filmmaking process, I’m totally open to constructive feedback from people I know and trust, but I’m not sure I can handle the same from strangers. Nonetheless, I’m grateful some Letterboxd members have seen fit to watch the film and take the time to rate it! Perhaps if I make more films in the future, I’ll feel better about checking out the reviews for an individual one.

Among your other skills, you are a talented musician. Can you tell us about some of your favorite film scores? Any cello-heavy scores or composers you find particularly influential? While not really cello-specific, the music of Nicholas Britell makes amazing use of strings (see Moonlight and [TV series] Succession). His music is achingly beautiful and is often in rotation in my playlists.

More generally, Hans Zimmer and John Williams are both legends and I’ve always found their work to be very interesting. In recent days, I’ve been quite taken with the work of Daniel Pemberton, whose work on films like King Arthur and The Man from U.N.C.L.E. have a great populsive energy to them. Finally, when I’m into something more moody, atmospheric or modern, I appreciate the work of Cliff Martinez.

Are you self-isolating right now due to Covid-19? Discovered anything great and new to you to pass the time? We hope everything is alright otherwise! Yes, I'm quarantining due to a “stay safe and healthy” order in Washington State right now. Like many people staying at home, I’ve been watching a lot of TV, which includes things like Tiger King, Devs, Better Call Saul, and Dave (the show on Hulu). These are the things that give me comfort and distraction these days.

Jennifer Ehle in Steven Soderbergh’s ‘Contagion’ (2011).

What are your go-to comfort movies that you recommend to people at this strange and difficult time? This is a weird recommendation, but I’d say Steven Soderberg’s Contagion is a great choice. Contagion depicts a virus far more deadly than Covid-19, and how it eventually leads to the deterioration of the social order. But it’s also a deeply hopeful movie. You see governments come together to try to figure this thing out. You see the people on the front lines risking their lives to fight the fictional virus and I think it’s a great way to help people understand how courageous and valuable all our medical workers are in times like these. It’s “competence porn” in an era where I think we need to be reminded of what competence looks like.

[Editor’s note: Dave isn’t alone, Contagion has consistently been in our 20 most popular films for the past month.]

When the universe is allowed to go back to the cinema, where do you prefer to sit? As close to the center of the theater as possible, with my eyeline at about halfway up the screen.

What’s in your ‘hall of shame’—the movies you haven’t seen and know Letterboxd will boo at you for missing? Don’t worry, we’ll protect you. The Cabinet of Dr. Caligari and Say Anything. Also Firefly, the Joss Whedon show which I don’t think is on your website anywhere. Many people have been complaining to me about this oversight in my viewership for years so I think it’ll do well if we can list it here.

Which film from the past ten years that went by fairly unloved do you think will be a future classic and you’ll fight to the death for loving? I’m going to cheat a little and list a movie that’s eleven years old: Tony Gilroy’s Duplicity. This movie didn’t do super well at the box office when it was first released and currently has a 2.8 on Letterboxd. But it was one of my top ten films that year. I think Clive Owen and Julia Roberts have great chemistry, but I think the film’s depiction of corporate espionage is outlandish, fun and irresistible. These characters are playing a "triple game" and it’s so much fun to see the layers upon layers of deception that they’re creating, and the cascading impacts they have on their relationship. Also, how can you say no to a movie that has Paul Giamatti and Tom Wilkinson as competing CEOs literally going at each other?

And finally, please name three other Letterboxd members you recommend we follow. I collaborate with Melissa on YouTube/podcast reviews and she is incredibly thoughtful and articulate. I always appreciate Khoi’s thoughtfulness. And Mike Ginn—this guy is hilarious.

You can enjoy more Dave on his website; his YouTube channel; and his podcasts The Slashfilmcast and Culturally Relevant. Dave was photographed by Brandon Hill.

#letterboxd #how i letterboxd #dave chen #letterboxd members #letterboxd community #cinephile #film lover

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itsclydebitches · 5 years

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How do you feel about derivative art? I'm guessing you approve since you're big into fanfics. Is art that's derivative as good as original art? Could a well made video critique of a film be better then the film? Or a fanmade rewrite be better then the original book? And yes I know nothing "original" exist, but that's not the same thing as art that is obviously derivative. And the big question. Should artist be allowed to make money off derivative art?

For me it’s an all around “Yes.” I’ve read fics leagues better than published novels. I’ve seen fanvids far better than films. Granted, when you get into the subject of visual media you run into things like finances and access to technology. Anyone can craft a story with words, but only a few have the budget and tools required to re-create the sort of Blockbuster films we’ve grown used to. But why in the world would that very specific style be the only “good” art out there? Obviously it’s not. If anything, we value limitations in our art. Six second vines shot on cell phones are adored and can lead to lucrative careers. Films like the Blair Witch Project want to mimic an armature cinematography, like these people really were just shooting what they could while running for their lives. Amateur does not in any way equal lesser. To say nothing of the fact that fans have shown time and time again that a passion for the material and a huge amount of work ethic is more than enough. As the recent Loki logo abomination attests, all the money and resources in the world doesn’t guarantee taste---or success. Outsiders to fandom love to criticize the “horrible” fics they found when they dove into AO3 for all of ten minutes, but fail to acknowledge that you’re just as likely to find a terrible book when you pull one randomly off of B&N’s shelves. If derivative art is somehow lesser than we need to re-evaluate the comics industry. And every formulaic western, rom-com, police procedural. And every great author (there are a LOT) who wrote “classics” based off of other’s characters and worlds. Art is art. Mainstream art is in no way superior to fan art, no matter how much people still want to convince us of that.

The money question is, admittedly, waaaaaay more complicated. For me though it’s still a “Yes” simply because of how fandom functions. That is, we need the canon. Even if it becomes outdated, or is considered offensive, or is absolutely terrible compared to what the fandom has now produced, people will STILL consume that material (and more importantly buy it) in order to get access to all the good fan stuff. I’ve simply never bought into the argument that derivative works are a threat to the livelihood of the original piece because they depend on that piece. All my friends are in a fun discord for TV Show X. They’re producing all these fics I want to read. I’ve heard that Show X is actually pretty bad, but I’m going to watch it anyway because that provides me with the context that produced all this other stuff. It’s the foundation, the blueprints, the golden ticket to get inside the fandom. Will every fan do this? No, some do bypass the canon and just dive right in, but the majority of them will. Meaning that rather than posing a threat to the original author’s livelihood as most people assume, fanworks help keep mainstream content alive. Adding a price to that doesn’t change anything. If someone offers me a fic for free I’m gonna tackle the canon book first. If someone offers me a fic for $10... I’m still gonna tackle the canon book first. Either way the author gets paid and are likely to get more if fans use their work as an entry point into the fandom. “I wouldn’t have read/watched your stuff at all, if it weren’t for the fact that I want to read the stories my friend is now producing.” Giving that friend some rent money is the least we can do.

(There are obviously other arguments against making money off of derivative works, two of which boil down to “It’s against the law”---which funnily enough we create and control and can change if perspectives change---and “They’re my creations and I don’t want you messing with them, let alone making money off them.” I’ve got a lot of feelings regarding that one and in an effort to save a bit of space I’ll boil it down to a very unkind response: Too bad. Transformation is at the heart of human interaction with art. If you didn’t want that you shouldn’t have given it to the public in the first place. Authors don’t get to police how fans interact with their work: “I love it when you take the time to write me glowing reviews! .... oh, but not when you write another story. Please continue making awesome fan posters that promote my work! ... but not one with those two characters kissing ew.” Authors don’t get to dictate how fans interact with the art they’ve put out there; how much of it is active and in what ways.)

We also have to consider that we’re already in a world where those lines are irrevocably blurred. Why does E.L. James or Anna Todd get to make a fortune off of their barely changed fics? Why do artists get to sell their fanart but fic writers are still largely terrified of lawsuits? Fans are already making money off their work---always have, really---and I doubt that’s something we can reverse. Whether or not it continues to grow is the real question.

Personally, I wouldn’t want to see derivative works commercialized, not because fans don’t deserve to earn money for their labor (we do), but just because that would irrevocably change fandom dynamics. We’re a gift economy and we’re built on that. Fandom has always been about progressive acts: be it writing about queer identities, providing accessibility accommodations decades before mainstream art did, or (and this is the kicker) helping to level out class differences. Meaning, mainstream art is often for the rich and the elite. Broadway shows are insanely expensive and impossible for most to get to. Movies prices have skyrocketed. Every company is creating their own streaming service, requiring that you pay three or four $20+ monthly subscriptions instead of just the one. It’s all about money and fandom is one of the few places where we still exchange art for praise and more art, rather than a paycheck. Fic is free. Fanvids are free. You guys want a cute drawing of this couple? All you have to do is send in a prompt ask and I’ll draw it! Sure, I’d also love it if you paid for a commission, but I’m going to keep creating free drawings on the side. When was the last time we saw a mainstream author go, “Please continue to buy my last story, but in the meantime here’s a free novel I’m putting up on my website. Hope you enjoy!” I mean yes, we do get things for free (especially when it comes to many games, apps, and some short stories), but not like in fandom. There’s a culture of giving that I never want to lose. Are we already doing commissions and con sales? Yes. Do we often ask for donations and payment? Yes. Should we be able to continue doing so without fear of legal action? I think so. But I don’t want a general sense of “I should be allowed to earn money off of this” get turned into “Well if I can earn money off of this why wouldn’t I?” I never want our work to exist fully behind a wall where the key in is your credit card number. Fandom is unique in its, “I made this thing because I wanted to and I shared it with you because I wanted to do that too, no strings attached” and that, I think, is worth protecting.

#fandom #fic things #mymetas #Anonymous

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lilyvandersteen · 4 years

Text

Out of the Blue: To the Rescue

Cover art: @redheadgleek

Beta extraordinaire: @hkvoyage

Links: AO3, FF.net

Author’s Note:

This chapter was the most exciting one to write. I hope you enjoy reading it too!

Chapter 9: To the Rescue

"His misfortunes!" repeated Darcy contemptuously; "yes, his misfortunes have been great indeed."

"And of your infliction," cried Elizabeth with energy. "You have reduced him to his present state of poverty--comparative poverty. You have withheld the advantages which you must know to have been designed for him. You have deprived the best years of his life of that independence which was no less his due than his desert. You have done all this! and yet you can treat the mention of his misfortune with contempt and ridicule."

(An excerpt from Pride and Prejudice, by Jane Austen)

The day of Sam and Mercedes’ wedding, Blaine was woken up at a quarter to four in the morning by the PI, who informed him that Chandler had gone to the restaurant at night, broken in and started a fire. It had all gone too fast for the PI to prevent it or put the fire out without too much damage. “Must have used gasoline or something, the fucker!”

However, the PI did have all the proof needed to convict Chandler for arson, so that was a plus.

“He’s gone somewhere else now. Jack’s following him. I have to stay here until the firefighters arrive.”

“Keep me posted.”

“Will do.”

Not even ten minutes later, the phone rang again, this time around to tell Blaine that Chandler had wreaked havoc at the church. Again, the PI had failed to prevent the damage. He did have proof of Chandler’s misdeeds, though.

That rat! That fucking bastard! Who the hell does things like that! He’ll pay for this! But first, I need to fix it. I won’t give him the satisfaction of having ruined the wedding. No, sir.

“Enough!” Blaine hissed. “Tell me where he’s heading now!”

“I think he’s going to the bakery. Mulberry Drive 224.”

“The both of you, go there as fast as you can and grab Chandler BEFORE he ruins the wedding cake. I’ll call the police and then I’ll be on my way to Lima, too.”

Before he left his parents’ house, he shook Cooper awake and told him what was happening.

Coop, once he was awake enough to pay attention, swore under his breath, and then took a wad of cash and his credit card out of his wallet and handed all of it to Blaine. “Go and fix this, Blaine. I don’t care how much it will cost. You need to save this wedding. Oh, this is all my fault, I should have used my influence to put Chandler behind bars for what he did to Kurt. The guy’s crazy!”

Blaine shook his head. “This is not your fault. If anything, it’s mine! I should have contacted our PI long before now, and I should have put two and two together.”

“No use arguing now,” Coop said. “Go!! I’ll make your excuses to Mom and Dad, and I’ll come to the church as fast as I can so I can help out, too.”

Shortly after seven in the morning,, Blaine was surveying the damage at the church. The minister and his wife were with him, sad and subdued.

“And to think we were worried about ever raising enough money to repair the roof,” the wife whispered, and started crying, her hand over her mouth.

The minister took her in his arms to comfort her, and said, “This looks worse than it is, Doris. Nothing some cleaning and scrubbing and painting won’t fix.”

Blaine took his chance. “Reverend, I’ll pay for everything, also the roof and any other repairs the church might need, if you can help me save the wedding today.”

The minister patted his arm. “No need to bribe us. We love Sam and Mercedes, and of course we’ll do our utmost to get this mess cleaned up in time. I’ll contact everyone I know, and I’m sure they’ll all chip in.”

Blaine grimaced. “It’s not just the church.”

He explained about the restaurant burning down, and saw the minister frown, deep in thought.

Then Doris suggested, “We could use our garden, right, Jim? And the ladies of our congregation could help out with the food. It won’t be much, and it won’t be fancy, but at least it’ll be something. Maybe we could have a barbecue? We can use our grill, and Mr. Rogers will lend us his, too, I’m sure.”

The minister nodded, a slow smile stealing over his face as he squeezed his wife’s hand.

“That sounds wonderful,” Blaine said. “I’ll arrange for meat and fruit and vegetables and so on to be delivered to your house then, ma’am. Also the wedding cake, which is thankfully unharmed. Could you please make me a list of everything you ladies will need?”

He followed the minister to his house, inspected the garden, which was certainly big enough and then some, and helped Doris compile a list of food for the barbecue.

“We’ll also need decorations,” she said hesitantly. “For the church, and for here in the garden. And lights. Crockery and silverware. Tables and chairs too. I could ask the parishioners, but I don’t know…”

“On it,” Blaine promised. “Here’s my cell phone number. If anything else comes to mind, you text or call me, okay? Or if there is any problem, just holler and I’ll fix it for you. All right? That’s kind of my job, problem-solving, and I’ve got all sorts of handy connections.”

She nodded and smiled at him. “Sam and Mercedes must be very good friends of yours for you to go to all this trouble.”

Blaine smiled back. “Sam’s a great guy. And he deserves a perfect wedding.”

From then on, the rest of the morning was a blur of activity. Blaine tackled the decoration issue first, knowing they’d need all the time they could get. Remembering how the loft and terrace had looked at that first wedding Kurt had organized, he searched for a beautiful gauzy fabric to hide any imperfections with, and bought the shop’s entire supply of it. He also stocked up on string lights, table cloths and runners, centerpieces, napkins, china, silverware and glasses, and bought a mountain of food, dozens of champagne and wine bottles and fizzy drinks for the children, as well as cooler boxes and refrigerators to store everything in, and sent it all over to the minister’s along with the wedding cake.

While handing the delivery boy a tip, he got a phone call from Sam, and knew that he had to trust the ladies of the church to organize and carry out the rest of the tasks there, because he couldn’t go back to the church and help. Sam’s predicament sent him in another direction.

Sam was usually so relaxed and zen that Blaine hadn’t immediately recognized the voice on the phone, panicked as it sounded. The gist of the matter was that Sam’s best man had disappeared. He’d been staying with his parents for the weekend, but according to them, he hadn’t returned from the rehearsal dinner they’d had the previous evening. His bed hadn’t been slept in. He also hadn’t called or texted, and his phone went straight to voicemail. His suit was hanging on the wardrobe next to his bed, but the wedding rings were nowhere to be found.

“What am I gonna do?”

“You don’t need to do a thing, Sam,” Blaine assured him. “I’ll handle this. All I need is for you to send me a recent picture of the guy that’s missing. I’ll also need to know his full name and his birth date and what he was wearing last night. Oh, and his telephone number. Maybe we can track his cell phone to find him.”

Blaine hurried to his car, and rummaged in the glove compartment for a pen and a piece of paper so that he could jot everything down.

Sam was silent for a minute. “Wow. You always know what to do, don’t you? All right, it’s Michael Robert Chang Jr., born on the 28th of April 1982. I can’t look up his number on my phone while I’m calling you, so I’ll text you his number later. What was he wearing yesterday? I really can’t remember. I’ll call his mom and get back to you, okay?”

“Just give me her number, that’s faster,” Blaine told him. “Text me both Michael’s number and his mother’s. And a picture, please.”

“Kay. And what do I do about the rings?”

“Easy. Tell me what jeweler the rings are from, and I’ll get you new ones. And I’ll gladly stand in as your best man, unless you’d rather ask someone else.”

“You will?”

“Absolutely.”

“Thanks, man. You’re a lifesaver!”

Blaine jotted down the jeweler’s name and address and rang off. After a short call to Mrs. Chang, he compiled an e-mail with all the information plus the photograph, and sent it to his PI, asking him to track down the missing best man.

He was already buckling in and starting the engine to head to the jeweler’s when his phone rang again.

“Ugh, what now?!” he grumbled, but he accepted the call.

It was the minister, who told Blaine there were protesters in front of the church.

“Protesters?” Blaine asked. “What are they protesting against?”

The minister let out a long sigh. “Mixed marriage.”

“Seriously? In the twenty-first century?”

“Yes, I’m afraid so. I told them to leave, but they wouldn’t budge.”

“Okay. I’ll sort it out, Reverend, I promise. In the meantime, tell your people to stay away from those nutcases, in case they become aggressive.”

“I will. Thank you so much.”

Blaine tapped with his fingers on his dashboard and groaned in frustration. Chandler, while being led away by the police that morning, had laughed and shouted at him, “Good luck fixing this mess! I’ve got some more surprises in store for you!”

Well, he certainly hoped that this was the last unpleasant surprise.

He called his friend Wes, who worked for his father, the mayor of Westerville, and explained the situation.

“You’re in luck. It’s outside of my dad’s constituency, but our riot control team has a training exercise near Lima today, so I’ll brief them about this situation and send them over, and it can be comped as extra training.”

“I’ll pay for everything. I want this wedding to go off without a hitch.”

“Are you the best man or something?”

“Yes, I am. Thanks, Wes, I knew I could count on you!”

At the jeweler’s, they explained to him that they couldn’t provide him with two replacement rings on such short notice. When Blaine told them that he only needed the order form for the original rings and could head to any other jeweler with that information, they backed down quickly. “Well, we can’t offer you the exact same rings, but we can show you a selection of very similar ones.”

Blaine looked at what they had. For Sam, there would be no problem. His ring was a simple band of white gold, which they had in stock. All that lacked was the inscription. Mercedes’ ring was more intricate, but the rings on offer did resemble the picture on the order form.

Blaine chose the one that looked most like the original, though in platinum and with more diamonds, and whipped out Cooper’s credit card to pay for both rings.

The jeweler looked over the moon, until Blaine insisted on both rings being engraved straight away. “The original inscription, please.”

“But… but… That takes hours!”

“You have until a quarter to three,” Blaine informed him, settling down on the plush sofa in the jeweler’s waiting room. “I’ll wait.”

While he was at the jeweler’s, he checked in with everyone.

He briefed Cooper about Chandler’s misdeeds, and urged him to go to the church asap to see if anything else needed to be arranged. “Already there, bro! I’ll handle things at the church, don’t you worry.”

He asked his PI for updates, and just after noon, he got word that Michael Chang Jr. had been found in Faurot park. Drugged, unresponsive and suffering from hypothermia, but otherwise okay.

Blaine asked for Michael to be brought to the nearest hospital, and called Mrs. Chang to tell her the news.

Then he contacted the minister again to tell him a riot control team was on the way, and to know how the clean-up and decorating was going. The minister sounded a lot happier than last time he heard him. The riot team had already come and taken the protesters away, and everyone from the neighbourhood was helping out. Both the garden and the church were starting to look festive.

“Do you have everything you need?”

“I think we do, yes. Thank you!”

After twiddling his thumbs for a while, it occurred to Blaine that Mercedes and Sam would need music, too, for their first dance and the ensuing party, so he called Thad, who’d started a band after he graduated and was always looking for gigs. Thad and his band mates weren’t yet booked for that day, and agreed to play at the wedding.

“Sure, dude. We’ll be there! What’s the song for the first dance?”

“I’ll give you the groom’s phone number, you can talk through the setlist with him. Best stick to a cappella singing or bring your own power supply, ‘cause the party is in someone’s garden, and we wouldn’t want to cause a blackout.”

“Right.”

“I’ll pay you guys tonight, when you arrive, okay? See you then!”

Finally, the rings were done, and Blaine paid for the engraving and gave the jeweler a hefty tip for doing it so quickly.

The smell of grilling meat hit his nose when he stepped outside, and his stomach growled. He’d forgotten to eat breakfast that morning, and in the meantime it was – he checked his watch – half past two. Also, he still had to shower, shave and do his hair and put on the suit he’d brought for the occasion. Which was at his parents’ house in Westerville. There was no way he’d be able to drive there and get back to Lima on time. But he couldn’t show up unkempt and unshaven either.

Think, Anderson.

But his energy was depleted, and instead of hurrying to sort this out, too, he sagged against his car and passed a hand over his eyes.

His phone rang, and he grabbed it sluggishly. It was Cooper.

“Hey squirt! If I know you, you’re still out there somewhere in your sweats and with your bedhead, right? Well, seeing as you’re cutting it close, I’ve brought your suit here, and I’ve asked the minister if you could use his bathroom to get ready. Oh, and I’ve ordered pizza. You probably haven’t eaten a bite yet all day.”

Blaine let out a shaky laugh. “Thanks, Coop.”

“No problem. Get here pronto, and there still might be a meat lovers pizza for you.”

Blaine felt much better once he was all spruced up and had some food in his belly. He followed Sam into the church, noting that the protesters were gone and that any trace of the vandalism had been wiped out or camouflaged.

As the bride came down the aisle, everyone sitting in the pews was smiling, so he hoped with all his heart that all the hiccups had been dealt with now, and that the wedding would be smooth sailing.

Wait, did he say everyone? Kurt was looking straight at him, and seemed put out about something.

Blaine inclined his head and smiled hesitantly at his crush, who responded with a fierce glare.

What was that about? Oh… Had Blaine missed a best man cue? He pulled his attention back to the ceremony, but no, the minister was still talking, and all he had to do at the moment was stand there and listen.

He liked the minister’s sermon. He spoke of love not being a feeling but a commitment, something to work on every day. It was no-nonsense and poignant, and the sentiments expressed struck a chord with him.

He couldn’t help stealing a glance at Kurt every now and then. Kurt was wearing a light grey tuxedo, and looking so much like Blaine’s daydreams about them getting married that it made Blaine want to go and kiss him.

The exchanging of the vows and the rings came and went, and Mercedes didn’t seem to have noticed her ring was slightly different from the one she’d chosen.

Still, Blaine didn’t breathe easy until the ceremony was over and everyone was in the minister’s garden, laughing and talking and queuing at the buffet.

There had been no more alt-righters outside the church when they all filed out, the garden looked like a dream and the food smelled amazing, even after that large pizza Blaine had gobbled up earlier. Now he hoped that Thad and his band mates would arrive on time, and then there would be nothing more to worry about.

Thad did turn up, and Blaine bopped his head happily to the music as he worked up the courage to ask Kurt to dance, moving closer to him where he was chatting with the bride.

When he got within hearing distance, he was dismayed to hear that Kurt disapproved of him as the replacement best man. Kurt’s assessment of him stung, but Blaine had to admit that he had a point. Blaine had lost his temper around Kurt on several occasions, and yes, he had been rude.

Determined to make up for past mistakes, Blaine pasted on his most charming smile as he endeavoured to catch Kurt’s attention and then asked him to dance.

Kurt blushed, actually blushed, when he saw Blaine, and his mouth fell open when Blaine held out his hand for him to take.

After Kurt’s diatribe, he’d expected to be turned down flat, but miraculously, Kurt said yes, and moments later, Blaine was in seventh heaven with Kurt in his arms.

He didn’t feel much like talking, wanting to soak up every aspect of this dance so he’d be able to relive it a million times in daydreams. However, he made an effort to be sociable by praising first the ceremony, then the wedding dress, and then Kurt’s prowess, when it turned out Kurt had made the dress himself. Wow, was there anything he couldn’t do?

Kurt let out the cutest giggle at the compliment, and it made Blaine giddy. He was making progress here, wasn’t he? Real progress!

Yet there had been that glare earlier, and Kurt darkly referring to horrible things Blaine had done.

Before he knew it, Blaine had asked what that had been all about, and then wished he’d held his tongue,, because Kurt looked spitting mad again, and brought up the incident at the wedding where they met, and… What? The way Blaine had treated Chandler? Shouldn’t that be the other way round? Chandler was by no means the victim here!

But when Blaine said so, Kurt’s retort made it seem like he thought Blaine and Chandler had been dating at one time. What kind of lies had Chandler been telling him?

Must not lose my temper… Must not lose my temper…

Blaine kept his reply short and to the point, and as soon as he’d set Kurt straight, he strode out of the garden before he could blow up entirely.

Ugh, that little weasel! What on earth did he tell Kurt? And is there no end to his manipulation and sabotage?

By the time he reached his parents’ house, he was a little bit calmer, and had decided to send Kurt an e-mail with the cold hard facts and the evidence. Heaven knew there was enough of it by now. And then Kurt could decide whom he wanted to believe.

It rankled how Kurt was so ready to believe the worst of Blaine and the best of Chandler. But at least on that count, Blaine had the truth on his side. The rant at the wedding, however, had been entirely Blaine’s fault, and he’d apologise for that once more. And he would strive to conquer his temper. He would.

An hour and a half later, he re-read what he’d written, checked the attachments, and then logged into Cooper’s work mail account to find Kurt’s e-mail address. It wasn’t stalking, okay? It wasn’t. Blaine didn’t plan on writing to Kurt ever again, but he deserved to know the truth. And Blaine deserved… closure.

After this, he’d stay away from Kurt. He was determined not to seek him out again. He’d leave the initiative up to Kurt.

Yeah, tell that to someone who’ll believe you…

#bbb2020 #blaine big bang 2020 #klaine fanfiction #my fic #out of the blue

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daegurp-blog · 5 years

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WELCOME TO DAEGU !!

loading dossier on AHN MIRAE —— please be sure to take a look at the checklist before venturing around town.

BASIC STUFF.

FACECLAIM: kim chungha. MUSE’S NAME: ahn mirae. PRONOUNS: she/her. GENDER: cisgender female. AGE: twenty three.

PERSONALITY.

POSITIVE TRAITS: creative, ambitious, outgoing. NEGATIVE TRAITS: stubborn, reticent, perfectionist. MUSE AESTHETICS: the sound of the violin string as it hits its crescendo, cherry red lipstick upon plump lips, the soft patter of rain as it hits the concrete, the light of a full moon, and the sound of a bottle of champagne popping off. QUOTE: i still remember you as a little girl who overwaters plants because she doesn’t know when to stop giving.

BACKGROUND.

music was woven into every part of mirae’s childhood. her father was a prominent violin and cello player and her mother was mysteriously out of the picture by the time she gained her first memories in childhood. in truth, mirae’s mother had been a woman that her father had once had an affair with, an assistant of a sort but was unwilling to marry her or having anything to do with her after the birth of his daughter. with the sum of money he already had, he paid the woman off for her silence and the idea that she would never become involved in her daughter’s life. and for the longest time the woman would stick to that agreement.

mirae grew up attending a lot of her father’s orchestra practices and sometimes his shows, whenever he couldn’t be bothered to hire a babysitter or if she had one and forced them to let her watch and bask in the performance. she couldn’t help herself if she began to idolize her father back then. she wanted to be just like him, she wanted to play and perform and rise in the ranks of first chair just as he had. even as he became a partial owner of the orchestra and found his status and wealth rise in doing so. it meant that mirae was living the good life, wealth and luxury but with her kind nature and outgoing personality she refused to let it spoil her and let her think of anyone who wasn’t as affluent as anything less.

she begged her father to learn how to play and after school she had various lessons and tutoring in violin, piano, and singing. she practiced hard and long, oftentimes doing so outside of her lessons, she was always the girl who brought her violin to school, to after school activities, even to times hanging out with her friends because a part of her didn’t feel complete without it. mirae was active in choir and orchestra in her private school and she made sure to keep her academics up because anything less than perfection wasn’t something that her father would accept. that put a bit of a perfectionist streak in her growing up and it pushed her and pushed her and at times that meant her friendships and relationships failed or waned because she knew she had to be the best.

( trigger warning: mental illness ) it paved the way for an inevitable breakdown after her graduation from school. she had been pushing herself too hard in her final year, trying to secure scholarships with the best universities, taking classes for college credit even before leaving regular school. it forced her to take a gap year between private school and university. a year where she distanced herself from her music, her violin hidden away in her closet, the piano collecting dust and her father unsure what to do for her. he gave her doctors and medication and she was diagnosed with depression and partial anxiety. it would take her the full year to deal with it and find a way past it. but she realized she couldn’t let this defeat her, especially when she had dreams.

after that year, mirae pushed herself and applied to university, she was accepted into yeungnam university on a scholarship that gave her a full ride. she decided to major in musical theory and performance and she finally picked her violin back up and found herself again. since then she has made it to her final year of undergrad, and though he isn’t paying for her education at the moment, he is still supporting her through her living situation and expenses. he pays for her apartment and the like, which is definitely on a more affluent side of daegu. she’s been trying to distance herself from her father but it’s not easy when he still pays for things in her life.

she has a part-time at a music store that sells everything from old records to modern day cds from kpop groups and the like. she is trying to support herself, so that when she tries for master’s or doctorate in the musical arts. to be an even better violinist and part of an orchestra, maybe even travel the world with one. she wants to be more than the prodigy daughter of a renowned violinist in south korea, she wants to be known around the world if possible. she still deals with her mental health issues, but she tries to see a therapist when it gets bad. and as of recently, a woman has been trying to get in contact with her, whom she believes might just be her mother.

INTERVIEW.

1. what do you do for a living??

“i am currently a student at yeungnam university studying musical theory and performance. i play the violin, the piano, as well as sing. i also work part-time in a music store in daegu.”

2. how and where do you see yourself being in 5 years??

“in five years? i hope to have graduated from yeungnam with my master’s and maybe even a doctorate of musical arts. after that i want to be signed with a major performing orchestra in south korea if possible, just like my father.”

3. where do you fall on daegu’s societal hierarchy spectrum??

“considering my upbringing, i would consider myself upper class. my father still supports me even though i am working while in university, though i am going to a private university. i’ve tried not to look down on others because of my status and my father’s wealth as a result.”

4. how do you feel about where you personally fit in the social hierarchy of the town and what are your intentions because of this??

“i don’t think i’ve ever been one for politics of any kind. i know that my life was a bit easier because of my father, but i’ve tried to make something of myself. i want to one day be able to stand on my own and the like and i know i will have to do that by working hard. i know that the hierarchy may seem unfair but i don’t think anything could actually change that.”

5. what are your goals and aspirations for the future??

“like i said earlier, my goals revolve around finishing my time in university and setting a place for myself to be truly independent. i want to become part of a prominent orchestra if possible and maybe even surpass that of my father. i want to travel and play and do what i enjoy in life. and maybe one day once i’m known, i could spread music to kids, to encourage them to engage in it.”

#daeguaccepted #daegufollow

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courage-a-word-of-justice · 5 years

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The shows that have made it this season will be getting their tags...soon. Because I fell behind early in the season, trying to read ahead is nastier than it really should be...

Update: I forgot to roll out the tags...! Sorry about that.

One Punch Man 2 1

This season’s name…sounds counterintuitive, to say the least.

I love how Genos is carrying a box of hijiki (which looks like hair) and Saitama’s wearing a shirt that says “hair” (in kanji) all over it. It’s funny for a bald man and his “work of modern art”.

I never knew Genos was so blunt. Maybe because the last season was a good 2 – 3 years ago…and was by Madhouse and Shingo Natsume, and so this feels slightly different.

Oh, Sonic…! I didn’t realise how much I missed you! (Not to mention, you look hot with the off-the-shoulder shirt, y’know?)

“Enoki” is a type of mushroom.

Oh, Garou!...Oh wait, there isn’t much more of the episode left, is there…?

Afterlost 1

Oh great…this is the second time the subs don’t work on my device of choice. Then again, it seems to be a problem with the ad blocker and not the video…Okay, fiddling with the ad blocker worked.

Let’s play Spot the Main Character Amongst All the CGI Guys! Yay! (obviously sarcastic)

Without the volume…this OP is, to not put it lightly, s***.

Shoumetsu means “extinction”, not “lost”.

And the reward for Jankiest CGI this season belongs to…

Okay…this is stupid…if it f**ks up even more, I’m out of here!

I know the horned owl is your mascot, but that doesn’t mean you needed a real owl.

Waittttttttt…how did the scientists know Yuki’s father was responsible for this stuff anyway?

I feel like Takuya was shoehorned in. I mean, there’s a better example of this character type in Naofumi (Shield Hero).

This guy’s name, as we know it, is Geek. Wow (sarcastic). Also, I find it funny Takuya has a “ta” on his licence plate.

“…she’s just a package.” - Welp, you don’t get any more blatant than that for female denigration! I think Anime Feminist had a field day with this one.

Come to think of it, I saw some helmets back at Geek’s place but Takuya never seems to use one…

You had one job, Takuya…*sigh*

I swear I said a few previews ago I don’t like 1st person cam…no one ever listens to me, do they???

Not dis shitto agen!

Okay, enough complaining. It seems Yu-no wasn’t bad enough, so they had to produce something like the Chaos Dragon and Seisen Cerberus of old…

RobiHachi 1

It’s Takamatsu being Takamatsu again. Also… I forgot to mention this earlier, but…Taiga Umatani seems to be related to Kurari Umatani (who is credited for Boueibu), so…I wonder if it’s a collective writer’s name for Studio Comet, like Izumi Todo for Toei? The only thing that goes against that is the fact “Kurari” existed during the Diomedea days of Boueibu. Also Isekandar seems to be related to Yamato’s Iscandar (which Takamatsu seems to like, based on the fact he once used Matsumoto metres as a shorthand for being in space). If you don’t understand, Yamato’s endgoal contains a place called Iscandar and that’s by Leiji Matsumoto.

Okayyyyy…what are these rabbit creatures…? But yes, it does smack of Boueibu simply because the episode layout’s the same.

Hmm…? So Robby seems be En (the do-nothing life) in spirit, but Kinshiro in background, but also he runs away from his fortune. “Hmm” indeed.

Oh! That’s what this string of misfortunes reminds me of! The monsters of the day from Boueibu.

Acrymalide.

Hatchi is a Kinshiro in looks but an Atsushi by being a goody-goody.

Hmm…they actually bother to show girls now…apparently Takamatsu went to a boys-only school, which is why his original works focus on dudes (as in, you can pick out when Takamatsu is adapting someone else’s work because it has a heavier focus on girls as supporting characters).

Mechs and spaceships are probably two of the only ways I accept CGI…and you, Takamatsu sir, have just done it (the latter)!

Aw! Lookit his (Hatchi’s) face light up like a Beppu’s! It’s cute!

Hatchi getting out the hatch…lame, but still somewhat effectve on me (because that’s my wordplay game you’re playing, Takamatsu…!).

LOL, it’s a transforming mech. It seems my words from a few comments earlier were basically foretelling the future.

Kimetsu no Yaiba 2

Yikes, “Sakonji Urokodaki” has a lot of strokes…

My Little Sister Lives For Headpats…hey wait, don’t all anime kid sisters do that(?)

For some reason, I know the “Don’t Lose Your Way” meme from Kill la Kill and yet I’ve never…watched KlK…?(!)

I swore that was Giyu (it’s the haircut, I swear), but it’s a random demon…

When all you have is a hatchet…use your head. (LOL)

Ooh, nice eyecatch!

This is really black comedy, in a sense. (I remember this demon fight from the manga which is why I say that.)

Hmm…this wispy stuff wasn’t in the manga.

Come to think of it, I don’t know how Tanjiro got his scar…

If you squint really hard, you can see CGI Urokodaki and Tanjiro…

He probably has no footsteps because of his shoes. Or the fact he’s a ninja. Were there ninja in the Taisho era…? Update: Tanjiro has the same kind of shoes…oops.

Come to think of it, Daisuke from DN Angel had to dodge traps every day before he became Dark…(thinking of this because I reread the first volume of DN Angel recently)

Oh! Manga panel preview! That’s quite fun, really.

Kimetsu no Yaiba 3

I just really like how Tanjiro’s eyes grew larger with what was clearly resolution before he closed the door.

Why do the non-descript hunters look like Giyu too…?

I’ve never seen KnY so comedic…and that’s coming from someone who thought the Head Demon fight from last episode was funny.

Welp, this is…kinda interesting (<- says a fan of Touken Ranbu).

This letter writing…it reminds me of Kekkai Sensen somewhat.

This realistic water…it’s beautiful, but it looks like it came straight out of Niagara Falls. Is that…too realistic for anime?

“No matter…”

It’s a fox version of Speed of Sound Sonic! Then again, the real Sonic is around this season and probably won’t be happy about that comparison…

Is “that guy”…Giyu? Or the demon who slaughtered Tanjiro’s family?

Spider lilies! I didn’t mention it last time, but the symbolism of the spider lily makes the ED real cool.

Bungou Stray Dogs 26

I’v read the wiki page for Chuuya enough to know the next few eps involve the LN Fifteen, so even though I haven’t read a translation of the source material, I know some of the ins and outs of it already.

Ooh! Kitty! (If you’re a manga reader, you’ll know the cat’s significance.)

I think at this point in time, all viewers are used to Dazai’s bulls*** by now.

Is it just me…or did Bones use CGI for the city? It actually looks kind of good…! Sasuga Bones!

I have a fic that predates Fifteen and could be set in the same period (the fic’s vague enough that it could’ve been them at 15, 18 or even 12)…and basically the only thing I got wrong was the fact Chuuya doesn’t have his hat (because I wrote Chuuya as having his hat in the fic). Also, the banter is tenser than I imagined it, but that’s subjective and something only I, the fic writer, can compare.

I wonder who the yellow-tinted Ability holder is…? Update: That’s Randou. Spoke too soon.

There was a box in the subs…I wonder what symbol that might’ve been.

“…closest to the explosion.”

BSD 3 2

Oh, so that’s what Randou was for! I see now.

Chuuya may be OP, but he’s one heck of a fun character…also, he’s not as OP as Saitama, so…yeah.

Oh, the ED from last time is the OP. I should’ve known.

I like the almost storybook-style of this episode!

I thought Dazai was faking releasing the hostages…I was wrong.

Face-stealing aliens return! (They were around last ep too, I think, but they were harder to see then.)

Again, watch for the cat!

Well, with only one suspect (or 3, if you count the Sheep kids), it was quite easy to figure out one of them was behind it. I kind of suspected Randou, anyway, considering what I’ve learnt from all the mysteries I’ve read.

Because I was watching this episode with the volume down low (so I could hear the OP and ED), the volume really did work wonders for the plot this ep…!

King of Prism – Shiny 7 Stars 1

This is the final debut of the season, so basically how this and Shield Hero perform will decide what will stay and what will go. Oh, yeah…apparently this is the companion to a movie, but the movie and TV series have slightly different content.

This dude’s (the one at the very start’s) so grumpy.

…welp, I didn’t expect it to be that much CGI.

This chunk of exposition…makes me feel like I missed something. It was probably in the previous movies, come to think of it…

Basically, this is…uh, Makura no Danshi or Room Mate all over again??? I’m noping out of here…! Bye!

Shield Hero 14

I’m putting this on the chopping block…just so you know.

…uh, age gap romance? It’s hard to tell at this stage, but they (Filo and Melty) sure act like it is romance.

Welp, this survived the chopping block. “Raphtalia backstory” is a good enough reason to stick around for, isn’t it?

Double Decker! EX 3 (FINAL)

I always miss the OP when I’m not watching Double Decker, but I miss the ED even more…

I can’t believe they tried to get away with a Spirited Away parody…!

I can’t believe I get to see Dr Apple all buttered up like this…

I love how Kirill is censoring himself. (At least he can prove he’s not a girl, unlike Valery/Milla, whose entire shtick is the confusion between genders.)

Oh! I think I know the answer to the case already! It was Kirill’s soap, so Doug is the “killer”. But then…why is it Derick, of all people???

LOL, the angles were so reminiscent of Detective Conan…

Underwear-stealing sextuplets…? Why does that kind of sound like Osomatsu-san…?

Ahh…I really am going to miss this ED. See you next time!

Shield Hero 15

I never thought Raphtalia would be so angry…that’s Naofumi’s job.

Okay…it’s the age-old question: do demis listen with their animal ears or their human ears? Do they even have human ears??? (That’s 2 questions, isn’t it…?)

Uh…CGI dinosaur, much?

Shield Hero 16

…and of course, the Queen is a loli. Of course (<-sarcastic).

“Why’d I even have to feed this KFC farm?” – LOL, but I wonder what it sounded like in Japanese…? (i.e. I didn’t listen to it and when I try to do that, there’s always something over the top of it…)

Sarazanmai 2

I wonder if I’ll ever get used to watching Ikuhara on a weekly basis…?

Kappamaki…geddit?

Wait…y’mean, Keppi’s breath smells like cucumbers? Uh…okay, TMI.

Enta’s Japanese house kind of looks like the one in Mawaru Penguindrum.

Wait…why does the Japanese word for “Fish Buffet” (Osakanazanmai) end in –zanmai? Does that mean Sarazanmai is…Dish Buffet?! (LOL)

Notably, one of the signs said “Union” in katakana. It must be an English play on words…y’know, trade union and union = connecting with each other? I’m surprisingly enjoying myself a lot with Sarazanmai, by the way. I didn’t think I would, but I am!

I think that might be Irohassu water. Or Dasani. I saw both those brands in Japan, but I don’t remember which had the green flowers.

Oh…my goodness! Nekoyama (Cat Mountain) Mokichi (written with kanji for “hair” and “luck”). It’s a Boueibu monster! Frick, I’m laughing too hard!

It’s very small and very thin, but the word next to the cat in the eyecatch is neko.

“…Meow God!” – It’s a pun on “Oh, My God!” but with a “meow” in it. It’s pretty forced, but it does get the nuance of the joke across…

Why the heck did the subbers choose “herb” as the word for weed in this? “Weed” is sufficient, right? Right…?

Well…if that spurt of water wasn’t symbolic…I don’t know what is.

The title translates better as “…but I want to steal”. Y’know, add a little force into it.

The two As and the “sara” below it seem to make a zombie face, huh?

Ooh, that ending…

#simulcast commentary #one punch man #sarazanmai #tate no yuusha no nariagari #Chesarka watches Tate no Yuusha no Nariagari #the rising of the shield hero #RobiHachi #double decker #bungou stray dogs #King of prism - shiny seven stars #Kimetsu no Yaiba #shoumetsu toshi #afterlost #Double Decker! Doug and Kirill #Demon Slayer #Chesarka watches KnY #Chesarka watches OPM #chesarka watches bsd #Chesarka watches Sarazanmai

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abundantchewtoys · 5 years

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HS Epi: Meat p19 reaction

I... don't really know what to expect anymore.

What could the wallet contain. A Dad note. A Terezi note. Or captchalogued people?

Odds are even we won't be seeing it right away. Though I'd dread to see Dirk's omniscient narrative voice take over narration of the post-victory scenes.

Still, Dirk should know better by now than to rely on his strong points this much. They're not evened out by a reliable moral compass all the time, and he's seen the results of that before. Guess with great knowledge comes great arrogance.

"Anyway, back to the B Plot." Ah yes, the B Plot. On Earth C. Featuring A2 trolls Karkat and Kanaya.

"Right about now, Jade should be wrapping up her political presentation to Roxy and Calliope" Ah, skipping right to the end of that, are we.

"Jade’s got this disarming combo of head-in-the-clouds flightiness and the kind of legit, down-to-earth cred that can only be earned by having done something like cutting open your own grandfather and stuffing him full of polyurethane foam." Ah yes, one of these definitely led to the other.

"neoliberal austerity measures" How often can we repeat the same 3 words?

Roxy groans upon hearing the phrase “neoliberal austerity measures” for no less than the third time in this presentation." Roxy the audience surrogate. Since it's our 3rd time too.

"JADE: as i outlined here in graph b-2 JADE: and here in figure a-6" It's a good thing timelines can only be scratched the once. A6 Alternia would have been a dreadful sight.

"JADE: and here!!! in this very spooky drawing i dictated to callie JADE: (great drawing by the way!!!) CALLIOPE: ^u^" Hah, Calliope's drawing skills have found another use! Political Powerpoints.

"JADE: the thing is that jane is an establishment leader JADE: shes looking at doing things the way our old universes did them JADE: shes pretty convinced that shes going to be able to replicate the capitalist hierarchies that earth had but in a more “responsible” way JADE: but none of that stuff actually worked!!!!!" That's a nice summary of the things that are wrong to Jane's approach, actually. Though it doesn't provide an answer to the underlying problem yet.

"ROXY: and u think karkat can do better? JADE: i think its worth it to give him a chance JADE: hes a leader of the people AND hes experienced firsthand what happens when establishment goes too far JADE: which i imagine you can sympathize with!" This really feels like a boardroom conference, with Jane trying to get a preliminary backing out of a captain of industry.

"Her graphs are floating around the living room in disarray." Hah, she's using her space powers for this in another mundane application. Though... not in any offical setting, it seems. Roxy and Calliope's home.

"CALLIOPE: i’m... CALLIOPE: going to get Us tea and snacks. woUld yoU like some, jade?" To be fair, Calliope's probably going to follow Roxy in her eventual decision, anyway. Her childhood fascination with trolls might have been abandoned for new interests, or she might trust her friend's judgment in matters political.

"Calliope excuses herself from the conversation, and flees to the kitchen, seemingly making no attempt to disguise the fact that she is in fact fleeing." What a cutey. Calliope might in fact be trying to flee anything reeking of negativity, associating it with black romance and such.

"Jade deflates as she watches her go, sensing that her presentation wasn’t the slam dunk she was hoping for." It's so easy forgetting that the narration is also at least in part steering the story at this point. >_<

"ROXY: well i gotta say ROXY: this has been a hella convincing argument all in all ROXY: buuuuut idk if i can help u out" Maybe they would actually like to stay neutral?

"She and Calliope live in a belfry above New Prospit. One end of their living room is an oriel window that looks out over a public park. The other disappears into an arcading hallway lit at the far end by a giant stained glass window that Calliope made herself. The corbels supporting it have windy, abstract shapes carved into them." Artsy! I didn't know what to picture for their living space, but actually Calliope taking to carapacian art-deco and giving it a cheruban twist really works!

"That’s what keeps Jade Harley flitting from couch to couch, relationship to relationship. She can’t stop thinking to herself that “home” comes awfully close to rhyming with “alone.”" Home Alone, huh?

"Home is John, who doesn’t call anymore. Home is when Rose and Kanaya welcome her in from a cold night and help her set lyrics to her sick basslines. Home is here, snorting at Roxy’s irreverent method of storytelling and admiring Callie’s art. Home is Dave and Karkat." This REALLY reminds me of the Tramp, as he had a home in every street he frequented.

"ROXY: im alls ABOUT the sowing of discord among my childhood friends" She's had quite her fill of the dramas. That's a valid reason to stay out of it. She'll just have to weight it against the downsides of not influencing the outcome of the election in any positive way.

"JADE: dirk got to you first ROXY: not even ROXY: i got no problem tellin dirk where to stick it lmao ROXY: but dirks not the one running JADE: you think hes NOT the one pulling the strings behind the scenes? ROXY: sure but give janey a lil credit" On the one hand I'm glad Roxy's got such a backbone, on the other hand, off course we know Dirk's still influencing the outcome at the moment. Also, uh, he's got no issues invading the lives of his friends personally, even after telling us off on the subject first.

"ROXY: but shes yknow JADE: ruthless? :B

Roxy frowns. Jade is being pretty unfair." I get the feeling Jade is less good at filtering her words lately. And I also get the feeling Dirk is starting to sow a little conflict.

"ROXY: shes gotta be miss perfect all the time for the billboards n press meetings ROXY: always wearin those power suits trying to look like a big bad bitch JADE: you mean like....... the condesce? ROXY: wow ouch JADE: im not just imagining it though, right??? JADE: you see it too JADE: not to dredge up something horrible from your history JADE: but her whole image is just kinda...... *woof* ROXY: is that what you guys think? ROXY: u and dave and karkat?" It's something they should have brought up via intermediary channels to Jane on beforehand. Not let fester until all they could think of to "stop" her was introduce a late-to-the-party candidate.

Jade might also be doubly upset with Jane for seemingly mirroring the Condesce, as they were both brainwashed by her.

"Roxy leans forward and stares Jade down, like she’s searching for something behind Jade’s eyes." That's the same thing she did with John! Guess she's trying to find out some of her secrets.

"Jade unwittingly responds in kind, looking for meaning behind Roxy’s gaze. But she comes up empty. And to be honest, so do I." That unfathomable personality might be your spanner in the works, Dirk. I can only hope she's secretly onto him. Her Void powers manifest the 'obscurity' different from Equius.

"In the spirit of full disclosure, Roxy’s the only one left I haven’t been able to crack. Her mind remains a total enigma to me, just like it always has." It's interesting, since they share so much in childhood upbringing, progeny, demeanor even at times...

"invisible, even to increasingly omniscient parties such as myself" *coughDocScratchcough* ... What would Reload Roxy be doing right now, assuming the session's timeline didn't stop when Caliborn's soul 'left' it?

"ROXY: but shes not betty crocker ROXY: and i luv her and i dont wanna hurt her feelings" N'aww.

"ROXY: and thats p much all there is to say on the matter" Second time the phrase's been used in the epilogues!

"CALLIOPE: oh, i’d rather stay Uninvolved, thank yoU." Passive player to the brink.

"CALLIOPE: i feel like interfering in both politics and a personal argUment between my friends woUld be impolite as well as kind of... stressfUl, to be honest. JADE: yeah JADE: sorry callie i probably shouldnt have put all that on you CALLIOPE: less apologizing, more snacking!" It's nice to see they're cutting her some slack. A horrible childhood, an early death, a spiel as a ghost... Oh, sure, she's one of the good guys and as such would have some responsibilities in the end, but it's nice for a change they don't expect too much from her. Maybe a bit too little for her own good, but still.

"Calliope claps her hands together. It’s a bright noise. Her tone of voice is bright too. All these years and she still can’t believe that she has so many friends. She smiles at Jade, and Jade smiles back. The tea tastes great. The cakes are even better. Callie’s an artist in everything she does." ^u^ Aww, that warms my heart at least.

"JADE: wow callie youre such an amazing hostess!" ... Well, she's a more excellent host than Doc Scratch, for sure!

"ROXY: psst not “her,” “them”" ... I see! Well, guess we'll be getting some more insight into the androgyn bodies of cherubs and how Calliope has updated her self image over all these years? Caliborn still had the giant eyelashes, so it stands to reason there were also other, more masculine traits to Calliope's body even when she still shared it with her brother.

"JADE: oh wow!" Oh, I figured Jade already knew about Calliope's preferred pronouns, but it seems not!

"CALLIOPE: bUt i did take comfort in “being a girl” for a very long time. this is something i’ve only recently decided." ... I just remembered how Calmasis also was this androgynous figure. ... I wonder if Calliope will be thinking about a name change.

So, I don't think Roxy's haircut is a sign she's genderfluid now too, but I imagine a lot of fanart has already been created for butch!Roxy by the time I read this.

"ROXY: m-me too actually" Oh. N-never mind then. That caught me unaware! I didn't see that in Roxy. For one, despite all the pink and the ponies, she didn't seem like she felt "trapped" in a role to me. Unlike Calliope, where I can see how she might have felt obliged to embrace everything not-Caliborn.

But this does shed a whole new light on Mom's overly childish and girlish bedroom in the lab. Like she was trying to compensate for something. Uhm... It might also be one of the main reasons behind her drinking problem. Her embracing girlish, adult woman habits but never feeling like they 'fit'.

Well well. Homestuck's main characters continue to be representation incarnate.

"Wait.

What?" PFFFFFFFFFF. I love it. Dirk's reaction is gold. Guess this completely blindsided him too and didn't shed any more lights on the inner workings of her mind than he thought. So even if he knew she was holding something back after the "yea", and maybe encouraged her to keep speaking, he didn't know what to expect.

"Roxy? Seriously?

Like I said, fucking inscrutable." Dirk has NOT just had an "I knew it!" moment.

"I never would have guessed. Not that I’ve spent much time contemplating issues related to gender. I’m pretty secure in my expression of masculinity, and..." That's a suspiciously specific acknowledgement, though, Dirky boy. :P

"You know what? Fuck this. I don’t owe anyone an explanation of any sort on this topic. I’m confident with who I am, what I am, my gender, as well as my understanding of the concept. You want my honest opinion? It’s fucking fantastic. Good for them. Both of them, I mean, but also, both of them in a singular fashion, since each one can now individually be referred to by the conventionally plural word “them.”" Pffff, of all the things. I didn't think this would have Dirk fly off the handle in such a Dave-way, while still narrating, but I'm happy to see it. In an out-of-story sense, Dirk is currently the audience surrogate, showcasing what a "true fanboy"'s reaction could be like, if they were both shocked to the core but mature enough to get over their shock without throwing around accusations and tantrums.

But yeah, at least the aloofness is gone from his voice, for just this time.

"I’m ecstatic for this personal development they’ve embraced, for the people they are, the lack of gender they identify with, and the pronouns they prefer. I’ve got no problem with it whatsoever, and frankly, it’s fucking insulting anyone would ever imagine otherwise." I can picture him speaking through gritted teeth, it's glorious! 'This is good, this is fine. I am doing great!'

"ROXY: ahah hahaha hell of a way to come out" Ooh, so she's not even out to Jane or Rose yet!

"ROXY: what even is gender" That is SUCH a Roxy thing to say. Also, almost stoner like. Picture Gamzee going like (in his quirk): 'Have you ever really THOUGHT about gender, man? I mean, really THOUGHT about it.'

"Jade looks at where her hands are folded in her lap. Bites her lip. She has her own concerns about this, her own thoughts. Reasonable thoughts, I’d say." "ROXY: i mean that was all stuff from our old universe ROXY: whyd we even bring it here right? JADE: right" I think for Jade it's not something she'd discard so easily! I mean, it all depends on whether 'gender' is something antigonal to your self image, in the end, I guess. If it isn't hindering you... that's how you stay heteronormative in some or all elements.

"Calliope takes a teacake between two of her claws and eats it delicately, hyper-aware of the horrible gnashing and snapping her powerful jaw is capable of.

CALLIOPE: my ideas aboUt gend—

SHIT. Between two of /their/ claws." HAH. Oh my god. The narration cut off Calliope. ... Pffff, though it IS a good callout, since I've been using gendered pronouns still to refer to Calliope. Whoops!

"CALLIOPE: i sUppose i only thoUght of myself as a girl because my, Um... CALLIOPE: my brother took mascUlinity qUite serioUsly." A) Still not saying his name :P B) Using his preferred pronouns.

"CALLIOPE: by which i mean, he became very enthUsiastic aboUt all the things it sUpposedly meant to be a boy. CALLIOPE: cherUb existence is dichotomoUs, bUt not in the same way hUman biology is. CALLIOPE: i sUppose oUr view of hUman cUlture indirectly inflUenced alternia’s development, which in tUrn affected yoUrs, which is something i’ve had a lot of time to think aboUt since we came here." Oh right! Lord English & Doc Scratch helped shape Alternia's development, so in a lot of bad ways there was a focus on power and masculinity, which may have trickled down into Earth's because of who created our universe, and thus it might all have been a self fulfilling prophecy, what Caliborn's gender identity is concerned! Guess we were due another one of these loops. :P

"ROXY: so much of what earth c thinks what boys and girls “SHOULD” do comes straight from the imagination of a bunch of dumb teens ROXY: which is totally FUCKED JADE: sure" Yes, and so much of what Earth C "should" be like, as a victory state reward planet, and the epilogues by extension, exists only in the imagination of a bunch of dumb humans spread over this globe. :P I reek a callout. Not undeserved, mind.

"She probably would have loved being a “they” when she was a teen." (Referring to Jade.) I'll grant you that, Dirk. But I thought you were doing paraphrasing other people's thoughts for the course of this conversation?

"i liked the idea of dirk" He'll love to hear that. :P Well, you know, Karkat had the same thing, he loved the idea of Condesce as a powerful leader, if not always the result of that leadership.

"ROXY: and also literally no one else on the entire planet was alive at the time

ROXY: but we had some babies without even bein consulted about it anyway so w/e" Context!

"JADE: personally im a big fan!

And like that, Jade’s smiling again." Nothing like Dave & Karkat to lift her mood. :P

"The storm clouds pass so quickly in her world, you almost wouldn’t have thought there was anything wrong at all. Roxy and Calliope certainly didn’t notice.

But there is something wrong. And this time, they’ll notice." Uhhh, wrong with Jade? Or something wrong with Earth C in general? Besides Dirk taking over, I mean. Oh no! ... Calliope left the kettle on! :P

"JADE: i... JADE: i.........

Jade drops her tea. The cup hits the floor and shatters." ... Is she passing out?? Just like Rose??

... Oh no. This doesn't have anything to do with John going back, retconning the timeline, and some of their selves being killed right? It shouldn't influence them, since they're from a different timeline, but with the talk about canon and relevance and truth and shit...

Is Dave going to pass out next???

Did John accidentally change the Reload timeline to be the alpha one, and is the future adjusting to the changes??? Or is it due to something to do with Lord English' powers in killing a different 'real' version of them?

"She takes in a sharp breath. She’s not feeling well suddenly. She’s dizzy, feverish, seeing things beyond her field of vision. A blinding flash of light. A black, perfect circle, burning a hole in her eyes." Wow. Just like John, she gets a vision of the Black Hole! So, maybe it's more like she gets backlash from suddenly absorbing the memories of Reload Jade.

"She doesn’t look bad at all— Jade wears unconsciousness well, having spent the better part of her life napping." Aaaand we're back in sleeping beauty terrain.

"But she can’t hear her. Jade is somewhere else right now." Uhhhhh. I thought they didn't really dream in the dreambubbles post-victory no more?? Also, those were all destroyed by LE, anyway.

Dang. That's weird.

Are the B1 kids (adults) actually going to be gathering in the Furthest Ring in 'person'? But why, and how? ... There isn't anything like a 'dreambubble self' body that persists in the Furthest Ring that John could have woken up like how you could wake people up on Derse and Prospit. ... Now I'm reminded of an old fanart I made of a green moon circling the Green Sun, with green dream selves for all humans & trolls we knew at the time (B1 and A2). :P

#homestuck #upd8 #reaction #homestuck liveblog #homestuck epilogues #spoiler alert #roxy lalonde #jade harley #calliope

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cassie-and-ren · 5 years

Text

Strings attached

Summary: College was… much better than high school, at least, but with twice the work load and less time. So you being in the second half of your first year, things seemed like they were getting easier for you. That would have been the case if it had not been for one little thing…

This is just something I feel like doing because it seemed like I progressed it too quickly with little to nothing allowing him to do so, so here’s some cute fluff for Kihyunie~

Enjoy reading~

Part 4 1/2

“You mean you’ve never seen it before?”

“What can I say? In highschool I was practically watched every second of my life just to keep my GPA high.” Kihyun shook his head.

“Then you’re coming to my house and we’re going to watch it together.”

“Come on, it’s a horror movie, why do I have to?”

“Because I want you to,” You have him a look, “Just relax, if you get scared I’ll let you sleep over and be sure no one kills you.”

“You mean hurt? Who jumps right to kill?” You and him shared a laugh but stopped when your teacher called the class’ attention. You had been working on an assignment and she allowed you to work together, of course you and Kihyun did and got the work done with several minutes after to yourself. She went around the classroom asking for answers.

“(Y/N) and Kihyun?” You both looked up, “What’s the answer to five?” He knew you didn’t like to answer aloud so he read the answer instead.

“We got:” He hesitated for a moment, “The substance would rise to the surface once it finished cooling.” No one else was making any noise but he heard a small snicker come from beside him and saw you covering your mouth.

“That’s correct, now that would change if a different element is added…” Your teacher went on in explaining while Kihyun set the paper down waiting for the class to end and you continued to resist the urge to laugh.

Once class was over, you and him went to the common area, there was a spot where normally no one would go to due to the distance it took just to get there, so you and Kihyun normally spend long afternoons there now.

“Why were you laughing?”

“I just didn’t know you had a lisp! It caught me off guard.” He sighed, “Aw, are you embarrassed by it?”

“It’s not that, I used to really hate it when I was younger, I’ve kind of just accepted it recently.” You smiled to him.

“Then I’m sorry for laughing at it,”

“You don’t have to apologize,”

“I know, but I think I will for this… it’s so cute, if I find something for you to read-” Kihyun started walking off. “Hey, don’t leave me!”

…

Kihyun had walked to school and you were taken by Jooheon so you just walked to his house to watch this “must watch” film of his. You had asked if he had any snacks in his bag and were digging through his bag at the moment.

“Huh?” You pulled out a camera, “You’re into photography?”

“Yeah, I used to major in media arts, but I changed halfway into the first semester.”

“Why?”

“Just cause, I figured a major in science could give me more options and if I wanted to go back I would still have the little that I learned in photography.” You smiled bringing the camera up to your face, seeing him through it, you made a sound.

“It’s too zoomed in, how do you zoom out?” He took it from you, did something and handed it back. Now you could see his shoulders. “This is so pretty…” You were staring at him while saying that.

“I am?” You lowered the camera and rolled your eyes to him.

“No, I mean the sky I can see behind you.”

“That’s funny, here let me see.” You gave him the camera back before he looked around searching for something. “Oh, that’s good, there’s some flowers in that bush over there, bring me one.”

“Why not just take a picture of it on the bush?”

“I have the camera right?” You sighed and walked over to the bush doing as he said, if you were going to do this you at least wanted to get a good flower and looked for one that wasn’t bruised.

While you were searching Kihyun looked at you through the camera, a smile grew to his features seeing that the sunset gave you a orange glow, he got into a different position and waited for the perfect moment. You look for another minute and when you finally found the right flower. A small smile came to your face and your eyes had a glow to them. Flash hit you and you looked In Kihyun’s direction.

“Did you just take a picture of me?” He walked over and showed it to you.

“Yeah… it’s really good.”

“I hate when people take pictures of me,” He just smiled to you. “Come on delete it.”

“I’ll do it later, I swear” You sighed, then turned to him and put the flower behind his ear.

“Since I have a strange feeling I’ll still find that picture later, wear this.” He just dealt with it and moved on.

…

Since his house was a good distance away from the school you two stopped by various places for snacks and drinks, and eventually just wound up at a mall where you got something to eat before meeting up again. You two sat by a fountain and talked.

“Mind if I run something by you?”

“Shoot.” You said.

“Okay, I saw this hair dye place a while back and I was thinking maybe I should dye my hair.” You nearly choked.

“Okay, that’s stupid.”

“Why?”

“Because I like your hair black, it suits you… kind of gives off that rich boy vibe. Which is what you are.”

“Well I think it’s a good idea.” He said, you humored him.

“Well what color were you thinking?” He took the flower he stuck inside his bag and presented it to you.

“This color.”

“Pink? That’s a risky color if it doesn’t come out right.”

“But if it does?” You thought about it for a while.

“What about brown?”

“I don’t want a natural color, I know those will look good.”

“I don’t know about pink but… how about this,” You faced him, “Since we only have five weeks left in the semester after it’s over I’ll help you pick a pink you want and I’ll help you dye it.” He smiled. “I mean it still won’t look good but at least no one at school will make fun of you.” He just shook his head at you, you laughed.

“I’ll remember that if you ever ask me about you looking good in an outfit.”

“That’s low, even for you.” He laughed and you both returned to eating.

…

When you two got to his place, Kihyun invited you to get anything you wanted before hand, you just found a blanket in the hallway closet and got comfortable on the couch while he found the movie.

In the course of watching it time only went by and it got dark right at the point where someone’s life was taken by means of blood loss in the eye. Things like that weren’t exactly your cup of tea so whenever you thought someone was going to get hurt like that again you’d hide behind Kihyun, he’d laugh every time.

“It’s not that scary.”

“Yeah, it’s not really, but who wants to watch someone get their eye pulled out by scissors?” He eased you by rubbing your arm, but you remain latched onto him like a leech until the credits rolled around. You relaxed, Kihyun got up to get the lights when you heard a noise and yelped. Kihyun turned the lights on and laughed at you.

“This isn’t funny! I don’t even want to think about seeing any scissors.”

“That’s just a normal things people have in their house-”

“I don’t care, wherever you keep them I wanna stay far away from them.” He chuckled.

“Well if you want to go back home we should go now so it’s not too late when I get back.”

“No, I’m fine just staying over… I mean if I can.” Suddenly you realized that you and him weren’t dating and staying over isn't easily you just telling him. He noticed that in your expression and nodded.

“We have a pretty nice guest room so you can sleep there.” You nodded, “But if you are staying over, I remember you were telling me about about that game you couldn’t get?”

“No way,”

“Of course I pre-ordered it, but I didn’t play it, I figured we could together.” You practically pulled him into a tight hug.

“Well come on then!”

…

You and Kihyun had stayed up until well into the night, thankfully you didn’t have classes that next day so you two went to bed the next morning. Kihyun woke up before you just before twelve, he figured you’d still want breakfast and made something simple for you two to eat. While the last of it was cooking he took a break to change the wallpaper on his phone.

He really didn’t lie when he said he’d get rid of the picture he took of you, but he instead moved it onto his phone, you just could never go on his phone to see that he set it as his wallpaper. After admiring his picture for a while longer, breakfast was done and he went to wake you up.

“(Y/N)? Wake up, you slept for long enough.” He knocked on the door in case you were changing, when he didn’t hear anything he cracked the door and peeked inside, you were still in bed. He went in and was about to start bothering you into waking up, but instead he notice how you looked while asleep. Holding on tightly to the pillow you were smiling slightly, he could see the skin of your shoulder as your shirt was pretty much off.

No matter what was going on between you two, he couldn’t believe that he hadn’t noticed how beautiful you were until now. He actually felt pretty stupid for having taken so long to realize that. He wanted to take a picture but he figured he wouldn’t forget this even if he wanted. He nudged you slightly and you woke up, at first your face was bitter but when you saw him you smiled and giggled. He chuckled with you.

“Hey~” You said in a soft voice,

“Hey… I made breakfast,”

“What time is it?”

“Almost two in the afternoon.” You groaned and pulled the blanket over your head.

“I’ll sleep until two at night, I’m still tired.” He got up.

“Okay, I’ll just eat alone and you’ll have to get your own food.” Suddenly he heard the bed shifting, then you were behind him.

“On second thought, I’m suddenly so awake.” He chuckled and you two enjoyed a late breakfast together.

Master list~

#Monsta X #monsta x kihyun #monsta x yoo kihyun #monsta x imagines #monsta x fluff #yoo kihyun #yoo kihyun x reader #kihyun #kihyun x reader #kihyun imagines #yoo kihyun imagines

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coeurdastronaute · 6 years

Text

Essays in Existentialism: Kiwi 2

previously on Kiwi

I know you play guitar, but if I were a drum, I’d let you bang me all night.

Lexa smiled to herself as she read the message. It was cute and it was really funny, though she wasn’t sure what it might mean, or if it was just a laugh for the stranger on the other end. Once more, to reacquaint herself, she looked through the pictures of the blonde with the terrible pick up line. Morning was there, and she didn’t mind it because she didn’t leave the bed. She had time to peruse someone’s manufactured self.

The first, the stranger was blowing a kiss at the camera, all squinted and adorable, with a kind of sultriness to her. She was all blonde hair and a square face. The next she was muddy from a marathon, smiling so wide her cheeks were tugging at her eyes, as she held a medal up, surrounded by a group of people dressed in a similar fashion. The last, she was at a bar and pouring shots, giving the camera a nice little wink.

All that Lexa could tell was that she was pure trouble, but by far the most interesting person she came across in her meandering around the app. No one gave her a good pick up line and looked like that in a sports bra. She should have deleted the app. Her sister would have told her to do that. Her manager would have told her to do that. But Lexa had a self-destructive streak that she often forgot she didn’t have full control of just yet.

The radio thing was over, and so she should have turned off the app, or deleted it completely-- she knew that. Today, she had a full day of rehearsals and meetings. She didn’t have to respond to the wild child of a girl. The message came at three in the morning, and Lexa assumed it was with the help of a drink or two.

But she sure as hell did. Lexa had addictions. She had plenty of them. One of them was pretty girls who looked like they’d leave her with a hangover in her heart. And since she wasn’t allowed to partake of her other proclivities, she sure as hell messaged back.

I do play guitar, and I’d sure like to strum your g-string.

It was short, it was flirty, it was terrible and hopefully funny enough. Lexa was oddly rusty with the entirety of the whole thing. She was an amateur at online flirting and bad pick up lines, but it felt right. But as soon as she sent it, she felt the tinge of embarrassment that would follow her for possibly the rest of her life if no one answered.

With a sigh, Lexa finally opened her curtains and greeted the day.

“Strum your g-string,” Clarke read with a squint as she chuckled to herself.

The light of the day was squarely in the sky, and she was still tired and oddly smelling like stale beer despite her best efforts. Her bartender hours didn’t mesh so well with her passion projects, but still, she woke herself up around noon.

For some reason, before bed, she remembered perusing the stranger’s profile again, attempting to determine who would use such a terrible choice as a catfish. Clearly everyone would know Lexa Woods. Clearly, everyone would know it was not her. There certainly was just no possible way that she was flirting with that Lexa Woods.

Fresh out of those, but if you want, you can tickle my ivories anytime, girl.

Satisfied with herself, she smiled and let her phone fall to her chest as she dug the heel of her palm into her eyes and tried to find some kind of energy to confront the waiting day. Her upstairs neighbor was already vacuuming. Her downstairs neighbor was already listening to the news at an obscene volume. In reality, she’d never sleep again, she decided. But she could afford the shit hole on the fourth floor, and that was where she remained. Debt-free and comfortable enough, which was somewhat of a leg up on some of her former classmates who were neck deep in debt and brunching away the pain.

I have been known to finger more than a guitar. I’m Lexa, by the way.

To her credit, Clarke wasn’t sure why she found herself answering a fraud. Maybe it was stupid optimism. Maybe it was boredom. Maybe it was sleep deprivation. Maybe it was the fact that she hadn’t come close to getting laid in too long to admit. Either way, she thought it was a nice distraction from the tedium of her internship.

She thought over her response, carefully calculating it as she slid on old jeans and a shirt, brushed her teeth, grabbed her bag, and emerged into the world on her way to the studio. In just under ten minutes, she was rushing through the door and out into life, no time for much thought towards living.

It was getting complicated now that it wasn’t just pick up lines.

You’re Lexa Woods, and I’m Gwyneth Paltrow.

She didn’t mean to do it, but as she climbed down to her subway, Clarke slipped in her headphones and found herself playing a familiar song that dominated the radio recently-- one that she couldn’t escape, and oddly enough didn’t want to just yet. She hummed along and tucked into the book she borrowed from her neighbor as she slushed her way across town.

The internship was an accident, one that she still wasn’t certain how she got, though she was not looking any horses in the mouth. All she did was run around and get coffees for her boss, but sometimes, she got to watch him work, and that was more than enough. He also critiqued her work, from time to time. It was mostly negative, but she was still finding herself, he promised. She snorted at how real it was.

I’ve met her, and you look nothing like Gwyn. Though, I suppose your pictures could be a rouse to seduce a silly singer such as myself.

Clarke mulled as she handed out coffees. Her boss stole all of her attention as they began to pack up for a photoshoot at the park. She didn’t think about the stranger for at least fifteen minutes. Of course, she couldn’t really stop.

And Lexa Woods is really on Tinder. You didn’t steal those pictures?

“Tell me what lens you would use,” her boss interrupted. She shoved her phone into her pocket.

Clarke didn’t stop moving. She missed her friend’s texts about plans for that night. She tossed herself into her passion, excited to just be there, to soak up what she could, even half-exhausted from her long night at work and the night in front of her. For just a bit, she was eager to learn and become better.

She is, and she’s chatting you up. How am I doing so far? Should I tell you that I find you gorgeous or funny, first?

Once again, Clarke found herself putting headphones into her ear as she traversed the city toward job number three. She closed her eyes for a moment and let the chill of the window and the rocking of the cars rock her softly. This was sometimes all she got for a few days. She listened more intently than ever before to the words that came out over the thick guitar. For some reason, she almost believed she could hear something different in the voice.

You always start with gorgeous. Didn’t they teach you anything in rockstar school?

What if. What if, Clarke asked herself.

I don’t know if I’d call myself a rockstar. Just a musician is fine. What is it you do, gorgeous girl?

I’ll tell you about me when you prove your not a weird, middle-aged man.

That felt like enough of a challenge. Proud of herself, Clarke climbed the steps and emerged in the city, now without sunshine and effectively night. With a glance at her watch, she set off a little quicker toward the bar.

“Well, it was fun while it lasted,” Lexa sighed as she tossed her phone to the side and toyed with her guitar a little more.

All was quiet in her living room as she sat on the floor and tapped her pen against the notebook beside her. The only reason she had furniture was because her sister made her. She was more comfortable on the floor. She felt less distracted when she was uncomfortable.

But her sister got her way, and the apartment had furniture. It had a nice long sofa, which was Lexa’s only stipulation-- she had to fit on it. The kitchen was fully stocked and decked out in all manner of gadgets, though she stuck with avoiding an open flame to cook. There was art on the walls, somewhat. Mostly gig posters and pieces that the decorator swore were expensive. It wasn’t huge or grand or even luxurious, at least not comparably, but it was starting to feel like home, and as a creature of habit, Lexa was almost sad to leave it. She kept it spartan and simple because that helped keep her mind focused.

Unfortunately, that also meant she had nothing else to think about beside the girl on her phone. There was half a song she’d been toying with half-heartedly, but that wasn’t nearly as interesting, nor did it look half as good in a low-cut shirt.

She didn’t want to prove who she was to the stranger. She kind of liked the snark that came with thinking she was just someone else on the internet. It didn’t stop her though. With a stupid face, she snapped a picture and sent it.

Would you like one with a newspaper and the date as well?

It hadn’t been quick responses, and so she didn’t expect the noise on her phone so quickly, though she practically jumped at the chance to see the reply. For the entire day, she felt herself glancing more toward her phone than normal. Often, she forgot it or handed it off to Indra. She liked being present in the moment, and she liked proving that she was a hard worker, now. But for some reason, she was eager to check between every interview and during every spare moment. But that was fine. It was strictly because she hadn’t had sex in two months and she was a masochist.

Well fuck me. I just used terrible and gross pick up lines on Lexa Woods. If you need me, I’ll just be digging a hole to crawl into.

Lexa chuckled at the reply and did a little shimmy of victory, though for what, she wasn’t entirely sure just yet.

To be fair, mine were worse. It’s nice to meet you Clarke. I’m heading out of town for a bit, and I think I’m going to delete this app, but if you want to chat, here’s my number.

‘Heading out of town for a bit’ meant a small Australian tour.

Clarke stared at her phone as she scrolled through the Twitter feed, the most recent update a picture of a small suitcase and a guitar by a large door in what must be the singer’s apartment. It was captioned ‘homeward bound in a few hours.’

She alternated between googling the singer and trying to figure out if it was really her, and not a picture from somewhere that she missed, and the blank message with a rock stars phone number. As soon as the picture came through though, she knew she wouldn’t find it anywhere else-- it was her.

There was a video she watched of a live performance and swallowed. There couldn’t have been anymore more beautiful than Lexa with the guitar and the rolled up sleeves and the messy hair and the long necklace and the tattoo peaking out on her bicep and the way she closed her eyes and sang.

Clarke clicked around and saw more pictures, saw more stories. She never thought to think about Lexa Woods. She just knew her in general. Now she felt like a super stalker.

Her heart went a little numb though, when the next video to play was from a few days before at a local radio station where Lexa, sure enough, was on Tinder, fielding random girls with limited to no success. So she was on the app. That didn’t mean she was talking to Lexa Woods though.

If you’re Lexa Woods, post a picture on Twitter of you, with the name of your favorite president written on your hand, and a backwards hat, with your left eye closed.

Satisfied with it, she texted the stranger and went back to scrolling in the wee hours of her after-work haze. There was no real reason that a superstar would be messaging her, or keep messaging her. It didn’t make sense at all. It wasn’t what Clarke needed.

What she did need, however, was sleep. She needed to focus on her life and the internship that was running her ragged, combined with her own small photography business of stupid wedding pictures and, on her off days, bands and artists, coupled with two bartending jobs to pay the rent. Clarke could barely breathe, and she didn’t have time for a gross, elderly dude pretending to be someone else.

I’m currently somewhere over the Atlantic. Wasn’t I charming enough for you to believe me?

Clarke snorted.

They were pretty impressive lines.

How do I know you’re really the beautiful girl from the pictures?

She hadn’t expected that part. But Clarke couldn’t expect for her to prove it, and not herself. It all made sense, and so she snapped a picture. Actually, she snapped twelve, before deciding on one.

Wow. Yeah, you’re gorgeous. This is a problem.

You’re up next, hot stuff.

Can’t we just get to know each other?

I’ll keep it cool, but there’s no way I can take you seriously if I’m not sure who you are.

Dammit.

There was a kind of dread and hope that happened at the same time. Clarke opened up Twitter on her phone and tugged down, refreshing it repeatedly. The more minutes that ticked by, the more convinced that she’d never hear from that number again. She hadn’t realized she’d hoped for it though.

About twenty minutes later, her phone buzzed, though she’d long since fallen asleep. Not even the vibration made her aware that things were happening.

There you go, princess.

Hi. I’m Clarke.

Lexa smiled to herself as she read the message when she woke. Something about being back home, and two oceans away from the stranger was oddly comforting. She didn’t mind the travel, and she certainly didn’t mind tugging herself away from the temptation.

Do you feel weird now, knowing it’s really me?

Her clock said it was just after ten, but she felt as if she’d been awake for years. Though she did nap on and off during the flight, something about waiting for a response kept her from an easy rest that normally came when she travelled. Hell, Lexa considered herself an expert on sleeping anywhere, anytime.

When she opened the curtains of her room, she saw Sydney in all of its sunshine and glory. It’d be hot and miserable out there, and she was ready for it. A year ago she wouldn’t have been excited to go running, but now she craved the hurt that came with it. It was a new addiction.

It definitely changes things a little. But who wouldn’t dream of being chatted up by you?

I should warn you-- I’m much better at this in person.

“Hey, Lex,” a knock at her door wiped away the smile and the apparent pacing she was doing, unable to keep still. “We’re going to grab some breakfast, want to come?”

“I’m going for a run,” she smiled as she opened the door. “Isn’t it just a great day?”

“Should I be worried?” Anya furrowed, balancing the baby on her hip. “You’re in a really good mood.”

“We’re home. I’m high on life. I’m about to go for a run, and then I’ll meet you for breakfast, okay?”

“You’re going to crash. You barely slept on the plane.”

I might hold you to that when you get back ;)

“I’ll be fine,” she shrugged and tugged on an old shirt and shoving her phone in a pocket. “I’m going to meet Gus downstairs.”

With a kiss of her nephew’s cheek and one for her sister, she made her way down the hall and toward her bodyguard in the lobby who got her into running.

I really hope you do.

Lexa was home and flirting with a girl on purpose, of her own volition, and not because it was expected or required. It was about making her own decisions, and ever since everything that her past few years were, she felt ridiculously good about such a simple decision.

Consider it a date then.

Should we get the first date questions out of the way then?

Clarke stopped right on the stairs as she climbed out from her subway ride. Done with her internship and on her way to a gig taking some pictures, she shivered slightly as the cold came down in a whipping wind from the street. People pushed past her and just two days ago she was a perfectly normal member of society.

With a shake of her head she made her way out into the world, adjusting the strap on her shoulder, the heavy bag carrying the precious camera supplies she’d saved and scraped everything she ever made, to own.

For a solid three hours, she was able to forget that there was a grammy-winner waiting for a reply.

Then what would we do on the first date?

There weren’t many nights that Clarke found herself without work. Her schedule was tight and she liked it like that. Kept her busy, kept her focused, kept her out of too much trouble, or at least the kind that she didn’t choose. She definitely chose a lot of it.

“I need to talk to you,” Clarke said as she reached over the bar and poured herself a drink, not bothering to wait for her best friend. “It’s urgent.”

“Everything okay?” Raven furrowed and watched the weird behavior.

There wasn’t enough time to answer and drink, so Clarke took a shot and let out a shaky breath. For some reason, she’d been holding it in like a secret, and it was too much. She couldn’t handle it. She wasn’t as cool or calm or collected as she originally intended.

After pouring herself another one, she locked eyes with her best friend and waited for the words to come, her jaw set tight and firm while she gripped the glass tightly.

“I’m currently flirting with Lexa Woods. Yes, that Lexa Woods. She has my phone number and we’ve been flirting, and she’s charming and hot and I am this close,” Clarke explained, holding up her fingers so that they were very close together, “From believing that this is something that could happen. That I get to hook up with the most gorgeous and talented girl on the planet. I need you to pinch me and break my phone, in that order.”

When she was done talking, Clarke tossed back the drink and hissed again, the liquor making its way deep into her belly, burning a hole right through her.

Despite the noise from the surrounding customers, despite the music playing and the day-to-day sounds of the bar, all she could hear was the thumping of the blood in her ears as the booze made her feel queasy. The booze and Lexa Woods.

“I need more of an explanation to go on than this,” Raven finally ventured, shaking her head. “I don’t think--”

“It’s her,” Clarke nodded, pulling out her phone and holding it up with the messages. “I made sure.”

She poured herself a generous drink once more while her friend leaned over the counter and read everything, her eyes growing wide when she got to the picture.

“What would we talk about on the first date,” Raven read, still amazed. “She answered, did you see it? Just your breakfast order. Damn. That’s good.”

“I am getting hit on by Lexa Woods,” Clarke repeated, pouring another. “Help me.”

To her credit, Raven looked back at the phone before taking the bottle away. She put the phone down in front of her friend, beside the glass of vodka and softened slightly. There was such a look of worry that she wasn’t sure how to convince Clarke that it was alright.

“Finn was a dick who cheated on you, left your bruised and fucked, and you need to get rid of him in your head. You have the chance to fuck Lexa Woods. What could make you forget someone else quicker?”

At first, she wanted to argue, but Clarke considered the words and snapped her mouth shut as she stared at her phone.

Promise me you won’t fall in love, or make me fall in love with you.

As soon as she sent it, she downed her drink and collapsed on the stool, letting her head toss back and forth in a wallowing and miserable state. Her friend just chuckled and patted her back as best she could from behind the bar.

I would never dream of it. You and me and absolutely no emotions. I get back the day after Christmas.

French toast and coffee with two creams and two sugars.

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betweengenesisfrogs · 6 years

Text

Toward a Critical Re-Evaluation of Homestuck, or: A Prayer for Andrew Hussie

(aka Off-the-Cuff Homestuck Thoughts #7)

This might be a manifesto.

Since the ending sequence of Homestuck in April 2017, and even well after the establishment of a canon aftermath for its main characters and the confirmation that there will be a further Epilogue, I've seen a sentiment among Homestuck bloggers and the Homestuck fandom that I find very frustrating, one that persists well into 2018.

The sentiment goes something like this:

"Homestuck is a meaningless work by a flippant, irreverent prankster (Andrew Hussie) who dropped his commitment to the story at the last second, and made fun of his fans for expecting there to be a meaningful ending. Furthermore, he continues to harm and belittle his fandom in the creation of Hiveswap, and only continues his work on Homestuck-related projects to exploit his audience."

Not only is this idea wrong, I find it disingenuous at best, malicious at worst, and actively detrimental to an understanding of Homestuck as a work. While it comes from an understandable frame of mind - the feeling of disappointment many of us felt at the end of Homestuck's pretty short and to-the-point Act 7 - it actively ignores the main reason *why* that ending came across as disappointing at first glance. Namely, it ignores the role serial storytelling - a necessity at that point in Homestuck's existence - played in creating misleading impressions of where the story was going among fans. Furthermore, it completely ignores how well the story arc of Act 6 Homestuck generally works when taken as a whole.

It demonstrates a very shallow understanding of Andrew Hussie as a storyteller, conflating his in-story persona with the actuality of a creator who demonstrates nothing but work ethic and commitment to his creation.

It ignores what actually happened with Hiveswap, which is that despite a frankly horrific set of circumstances that nearly prevented it from being made, Hussie was nonetheless able to gather a small team to create a game studio that delivered on every promise it ever made to Kickstarter backers and created a pretty solid, fun, and novel adventure game, with more installments and a rich evolving mystery on the way.

Finally, this interpretation completely misunderstands the way the idea of narrative is being used in the ending of Homestuck, not as a cudgel to beat off fan desire for thematic completion, but as a tool for delivering a thematically powerful narrative that draws parallels between the specter of Lord English and the way stories themselves are used as tools of oppression.

Homestuck isn't perfect, and neither is Andrew Hussie. But by and large, this popular perception of him is flat-out wrong, an exaggeration of whatever flaws he brought to the creation of Homestuck, and contributes to a misunderstanding of its ending. Indeed, I'd argue it is, in some ways, part of why Homestuck has rarely been acknowledged as a significant work of art. To understand why Homestuck is important, first we need to be able to acknowledge what it achieved.

Here's a daring notion: overall, Homestuck was and is pretty damn good.

Here are some reasons.

1) Being Forced To Tell the Story Serially Over a Slow Drip Messed With the Experience for the Reader

I can hear the bristling now. "I hated the ending," I can hear some of you saying. "It left me cold and unsatisfied, and damn it, that's an objective fact. Who are you to take that away from me?"

Actually, I'm not trying to take that away from you. Like, you're allowed to have been disappointed. I just want to point out that it might be a better ending than you gave it credit for, and explain why it came off the way it did. If you're interested in hearing me out, read on. You should know that initially, I was disappointed, too.

But after rereading Act 6 and the whole narrative leading up to that ending? I changed my mind. Rereading, I found it pretty satisfying, making a great deal of sense, capitalizing on major themes, and delivering a meaningful ending for most, if not all characters

I'll talk more about *what* I think the narrative is doing in a bit, but here's why I think it was misread, by me among many others.

Serial reading fucks with the quality of a story experience. I feel like this is a pretty uncontroversial statement. The problem with serial storytelling is that stories build on themselves, drawing on themes and ideas from earlier on to make a powerful build-up to moments of catharsis. This is the nature of story and character development. However if you're getting a story as little bits and pieces, it is much more difficult for this to happen. You lose track of these threads.

More dangerously, it's very easy to develop a set of expectations around a narrative while it's in pause mode. Little moments - intended to be part of a larger flow of ideas - completely dominate one's thinking for as long as they hold the stage. This is a common thing in fandom, especially webcomic fandoms, who deal with the slowest-drip narratives. Again and again I've seen expectations generated during webcomics' hiatuses lead fans to disappointment with the results, simply because those results have nothing to do with what was expected during one of those moments of downtime. El Goonish Shive, Sluggy Freelance, Gunnerkrigg Court - I've seen it in webcomic fandoms again and again, that the dashing of narrative expectations seemed like a betrayal of the story when read at a drip pace, but made perfect sense when viewed as a whole story.

This is not a problem Hussie was ever unaware of. Here’s an excellent discussion (among many) from one of his early Q&As that takes on the problem in detail:

The longer I do this the more I'm struck by how radical the difference is between the experiences of reading something archivally vs. serially, both for the reader, and the author if he's prone to sampling reactions frequently as I do. For the reader especially, I think the experience of day to day reading is so dramatically different, they might as well be reading a different story altogether.

The main difference is the amount of space between events the reader has, which can be filled with massive amounts of speculation, analysis, predictions, and something I guess you could call "opinion building", which can have both positive and negative effects. On the positive side, these readers become more closely engaged with the material than archival readers can be, zeroing in on details and insights which might be overlooked otherwise. On the negative side, I think that excess mental noise the space between pages allows can potentially be a bit suffocating, and put a strain on the experience the material was intended to deliver.

The archival reader always has the luxury of moving on to the next page, regardless of how he reacts to certain events, and thus can be more impassive about it. That internal cacophony isn't given time to build, and if there are reservations about a string of events, whether due to shocking revelations, or questions over the narrative merit of something, or really any form of dissatisfaction, all he has to do is keep clicking to see how it all fits together, and can make a more complete judgment with hindsight.

He goes on to discuss a specific example of how this played out for the readers:

The recent pages [the start of Horrorstuck] had me particularly conscious of the nature of serial delivery. [Eridan's betrayal] was rolled out over the course of a weekend, first with Feferi, then Kanaya. When Fereri dies, this registers as one extremely dramatic event. Cue the waiting, speculating, worrying and all that. When Kanaya dies a day or so later, it registers as a second dramatic event! Again the scrutiny begins which the space allows. Is this all too much? How do I feel about this narrative turn? Is this setting a trend for a bloodbath? Does that serve any purpose? The reader projects into the future, does a little unwitting fanfiction writing in his head, and may not like what he sees! All this activity becomes the basis for opinion building, which is sort of the emergence of an official position on matters, good or bad, which is only able to flourish in the slow-motion intake of the story. That official position can be a very stubborn thing, especially when it's negative, and seriously textures the way additional developments are regarded. It's really hard to shake a reader off an entrenched position on a matter, even when it was formed with an incomplete picture.

Reading the same events in the archive is quite different. Very little of that inner monologue takes shape. And while the events are still shocking, and the reader may raise his eyebrows a mile high, he then simply lowers them and keeps reading. In fact, because of the reading pace, I would suggest these two deaths actually register as only ONE DRAMATIC EVENT! One guy snaps and kills two characters. In the flow of straight-through reading especially, it is quite startling, tension-building, and can only serve to propel the reader into further pages, at a pace which suspends the experience-compromising (augmenting??) play-by-play.

Hussie would return to this topic again and again, including here and here and here and h8re.

This is in incredibly valuable insight for anyone who creates stories over the long term, especially webcomics. You may or may not agree that Homestuck's finale is well-executed, but I think it's hard to escape the fact that the response to Homestuck's ending, indeed, to most of Act 6, was hugely influenced by these factors. Why? Because the experience of Act 6 and 7 was more affected by hiatuses and the speculation problems they create than any other part of Homestuck.

It's hard to remember these days, but one thing that Homestuck was known for from about 2010-2013 was its absolutely preposterous rate of updates. I'm pretty sure that *was* the initial fuel for the fire that made Homestuck a huge fandom. What other website could you go to see a huge chunk of a story drop on you so regularly? No other webcomic had people using Update Checkers, programs designed to check the RSS feed of Homestuck and tell you within the minute that it had updated so you could check it out before your friends spoiled everything to you. What other webcomic ever needed such a thing? But the first era of Homestuck fandom was predicated on the idea that the comic would update every couple of days, sometimes once a day, sometimes *multiple times in the same day*. No wonder it got so huge so fast. It was an experience unlike almost anything else out there.

Around 2013 this began to change. Homestuck began having large hiatuses, the famous "pauses," and though Hussie indicated the story was working its way towards the finale, it ultimately took until the 2016 anniversary to complete.

Interestingly, it's around 2013 or so that we started seeing frustration with Homestuck break out into a large phenomenon, with many people arguing that the comic had stopped being good, and it's after the largest of these pauses, the Omegapause before the end of Act 6 and Act 7 updates, that we had the famous ending backlash.

The fact that very few people seem to have considered this in their analysis of whether Homestuck is good or not is absolutely staggering to me.

Given these factors, we would expect to see some of the enthusiasm taken out of the Homestuck fandoms during these periods, and strong opinions on where the story should go next, and, lo and behold, that's exactly what we see. The common sentiment is that Homestuck "stopped being fun during Act 6." Well, yeah, it's a lot less fun to have a comic that updates rarely than a comic that updates with loads of content very, very often. That doesn't necessarily mean the content got worse. And yet I see no one asking if this altered our perception of the story.

2) Serial Reading Problems Are Worsened In an Experimental, Twisty Story

This hiatus problem was exacerbated by the nature of Hussie's storytelling. I'd describe his writing style as "affectionate teasing": testing and pushing readers' boundaries, aiming for strong emotional reactions, constantly working to defy and mess with expectations, but ultimately working towards a rich character-based story. Hussie's work whiplashes between humor, horror, worldbuilding, action - it's intense and disconcerting at first, but once you get familiar with it, you see these that all these elements build toward a coherent whole.

I'd argue that this storytelling style is *uniquely* well-suited to long-form reading and endangered by drip-feed reading.

Because when you read piece by piece, you experience whiplash slowly, and that’s not everybody’s kink. Pieces that are meant to work together take on a different tone when read on their own. As discussed above, continuous events seem like separate events when read on their own, and this creates a *false* expectation of where the narrative is going. Furthermore, it's not as much fun to be teased or messed with in slow motion. The expectation that there will be satisfaction and resolution disappears when the current update is all you can think about. This, not a deficit in storytelling, is what created the feeling of "Homestuck’s not fun anymore." But it was the same affectionate, gently teasing storytelling as ever. But this only comes out when the work is re-read.

This is exactly what happened in Act 6 Homestuck. Events seemed like they would go on forever, when in real story terms, they went on for moments. Take the notorious Trickster "arc" (I can't even call it an arc - it’s more of a sequence if anything). Today it's remembered as an unendurable gauntlet of Hussie pushing buttons. The reality of it is, though, if you read through it, it's like Hussie pushing buttons for all of five minutes, like half a chapter from a novel. Literally all it is is: The Gang Gets High on Magic Candy > They Do Stupid Things > Blackout. Mostly it's an excuse for some serious character development *afterward* as the Alphas discuss the bad decisions that led them to this place. It may or not be perfect, but it's definitely a lot more reasonable when you see it's a quick tangent.

Act 6 is full of things like this: events remembered as horrible slogs that are really quite brief in retrospect.

This is brought home when you consider that events in Act 5 – hell, even Acts 3 and 4 – also brought on strong negative responses from the fandom - it's just that they were quickly buried under a story that was quickly moving on to other things. Here are some strong fan outrages from those days I can name off the top of my head:

--This interlude with the trolls is too long, nobody cares about the trolls, Hussie has abandoned the human kids --Nobody cares about troll romance, switch back to the kids --Jade hasn’t been seen onscreen for ages --Vriska’s creation of Bec Noir shows that she is too powerful a character, she will never face comeuppance --John is dead again and Vriska killed him??? --Killing Feferi, Tavros and Kanaya? That’s too many deaths --I thought Feferi was supposed to unite the troll races! You’re telling me that’s not going to happen? --Kanaya is dead??? Fuck that --Scratching the timeline? What, Hussie, you’re going to reset everything and ruin the story? --Equius should have gone out with more dignity, this is a betrayal of his fans --Nepeta shouldn’t have been murdered, this is a betrayal of her fans --Gamzee used to be cute, now he’s a murder machine, this is a betrayal of his fans --We never found out what happened between Gamzee and Karkat? Why won’t the narrative switch back and tell us? --Nobody cares about Doc Scratch --Nobody cares about these stupid Ancestors, switch back to the trolls --Vriska is DEAD? This is a betrayal of her fans

And so on. Reading Hussie’s old Formspring archives is a graduate class in this era of Homestuck fan frustration.

And yet today Act 5 is universally remembered as brilliant, thought of by many as “the time when Homestuck was great.” In my book, while Act 6 does take on different themes than Act 5 (focusing more on the protagonists’ psychology and failures), and thus may not be to everyone’s taste, the biggest difference between the two is that during Act 5, the twists and turns of the story were thought of as part of a unified whole, because the story was barreling along too fast for these complaints to stick around for long.

Given that Hussie has always been aware of the challenges of serial vs archival storytelling, I feel like the relentless output of the first five acts was in part an attempt to mitigate those problems. As if by shoveling content into the mouth of the behemoth, he could propitiate the ravenous fandom horrorterror and thereby stave off the descent of the Infernal Internet Speculation-Expectation Monster that was prophesized to devour all.

Unfortunately, he couldn’t stave it off forever, and lo, in 2013 did the IISEM descend with its glistening tentacle teeth, IA, IA, IA! CHOMP CHOMP.

It astonishes me that in some quarters folks talk about the 2013-2016 pauses as if they were something Hussie wanted, when by all evidence he tried desperately to avoid them up until that point. I don’t need to explain that these hiatuses had to do with restarting the whole process of creating Hiveswap and building a game studio from scratch, right? I don’t need to explain that he got screwed over and these were circumstances outside his control, right? Let’s assume we’re on the same page there. If not, I suggest you look into the matter before assuming these hiatuses had anything to do with creator apathy.

After a certain point, Hussie faced a difficult choice. Unable to keep up the rapid-pace storytelling, he could change the storytelling to make it suit a serial reader, or he could focus on making the story the best it could be for an archive reader.

I think he went for the better option: aiming for the archive reader. If you’re going to argue that he should have put the emphasis on the serial reader: which serial reader are we talking about here? The one who started following in Homestuck in 2010, like me? The one who started after Horrorstuck, and viewed it, but not the end of Act 5, as a complete whole? The one who joined during late Act 6? How the hell would you decide that? Whose experience is the one to privilege?

The only option that really makes sense is to aim for the version of the story that will be around the longest and experienced by the most people: the archive that is the complete story of Homestuck.

Ultimately, I don’t think he could have changed his style of storytelling anyway, and to do so would have been to lose the combination of humor, madness, and surprises that brought us all to Homestuck in the first place. Forced to reckon with a difficult situation, he focused on making his kind of story the best that it could be, and I think Homestuck is better for it.

Given his awareness of the problem as expressed above, I’m sure Hussie knew proceeding over the long term would stoke a lot of resentment in the fandom. But he went ahead and did it anyway, because his goal was not to live up to a certain set of expectations. His goal was to tell what he saw as the best possible version of the story. I have an immense respect for him for that.

3) The Last Pause is the Deepest (or: Omegapause Killed the Character Development Star)

The final hiatus problem I want to point to is that in terms of the narrative arc of Homestuck, the final pause, the Omegapause, came at the most inopportune time for readers to get a sense of the conclusion of that narrative.

Basically, many character arcs in Homestuck were concluded *before* Collide and Act 7. Before the Omegapause. Indeed, Hussie brought many long-running arcs to an end in a very satisfying way during the “conversation” sequence before the final fight, from Dave’s long-needed conversation with Dirk about Bro to Rose’s finally getting to meet and befriend Roxy, to Game Over!Terezi and (Vriska’s) reunion. In narrative terms, Collide was not the climax, even if it might have been perceived to be. The climax was the Retcon sequence preceding the conversations – the desolation of Game Over, our surviving protagonists’ despair, then victory in the form of negotiating with the Denizens, representatives of Skaia, to create a timeline in which victory may take place, both in game terms and emotional terms. The conversation before the final battle showed us an emotional victory – victory in game terms was really just icing on the cake, or an echo of that emotional victory.

The trouble is, having a long pause before the final battle sequences created the false perception that the conversation was merely the prelude to the climax: that, in fact, the climax had not yet taken place. For us serial readers, it was easy to conclude that there was further character development to come.

Well, in some ways there was, and in some ways there wasn’t. Dirk and Dave got to have another big moment in Collide that drove their themes home, while Rose and Roxy had basically already done their thing earlier and just got to fight alongside each other. Meanwhile Vriska and Caliborn’s arcs really culminated in Act 7, and some, like John’s and Ret-Terezi’s, were complicated and continued by the Credits aftermath and probably won’t be brought to a final end until the Epilogue. There’s a degree of variation, which I enjoy. Collide does serve some functions: characters who were at an emotional distance from each other (for instance Jane and Jake), got to fight alongside each other and start building back their friendships. Overall, though, the bulk of emotional entanglements got resolved in that conversation, making the Retcon the load-bearing piece of Homestuck’s climax.

This is why the Omegapause was the most dangerous pause: because it built up an expectation that things would further develop from there with new entanglements and complications, instead of aiming towards a tying-off of plot elements into a conclusion.

I remember what *I thought* the post-Omegapause sequence was going to be: a showdown between the kids and Lord English as he entered the game session through Bec Noir, Spades Slick and Lord Jack. I expected there would be a twist, and I expected one or more of our protagonists would die. I was thrown for a loop when I realized the story had basically been almost over, with no last twist, no “secret final battle” of kids vs LE in sight.

But as I reread the ending of Act 6, I realized: that would have been so much stupider than what actually happened. The fact that the kids don’t directly face LE and Vriska does is one of the most brilliant parts of the ending, and on the reread I rapidly fell in love with the Homestuck’s conclusion. What had thrown me off was the fact that I developed my expectations during a period where it looked like we were further from the end.

But in retrospect, Hussie had been saying all along that we were very close to the conclusion – it was just, at that moment, very easy to get the wrong impression.

Rarely do I see anyone taking anything like this into account.

I do think we could have benefited from more character development after the pause, if for no other reason than to overcome these problems and make the victory feel a little more grounded, and I do feel like certain characters (Jane comes to mind) got more limited and abbreviated endings. But these are minor points for me in the overall arc of Homestuck’s narrative, which in my experience establishes its conclusion very, very well.

4) Homestuck’s Ending Is a Glorious Queer Gnostic Account of Escaping from Narrative Oppression (and Yes, Virginia, it Has Character Arcs)

Okay, so I’ve written a lot about *what* I love about the ending of Homestuck elsewhere, going on for pages and pages, which you can read here and here. For now, let me just attempt (as absurd as it is) a quick summary.

Homestuck in Act 6 parallels many different motifs to drive home the idea that escaping from Lord English’s domain is an escape from a cosmic oppression, and serves as a metaphor for escaping and defying real-life oppressions and hegemonies. These motifs include Gnosticsm, queer identity, pluralism, and a metafictional examination of the controlling role of the narrative that is Homestuck itself.

Gnosticism is an ancient early alternate version of Christianity that posits a false reality created by a false creator, the Demiurge Yaldabaoth, who rules over human beings but whose domain it is the Gnostic’s quest to escape. The Demiurge styles himself a Lord God (often the very same one from Judaism and more mainstream Christianity) and an artist but is in fact incompetent and limited in comparison with the true harmonious reality. That he was able to create such a false world was a cosmic accident caused by angel-like beings known as Aeons, who existed perfect symmetrical pairs until an asymmetry caused Yaldabaoth’s creation. Sophia, the asymmetrical Aeon is our path back to that perfection. Furthermore, the false world is the world of flesh and matter and material things, while the true world is the world of ideas, symbols and archetypes, a place of divine Platonic form. By knowledge (gnosis) we become our true selves and are set free. Gnosticism is anti-authoritarian, anti-patriarchal, and devoted to each human being’s quest to connect to the divine on their own terms.

Gnostic motifs proliferate everywhere in Homestuck, especially Act 6, from such chat handles as GardenGnostic, TimaeusTestified, and TipsyGnostalgic to basically everything about Calliope and Caliborn, including and especially their role in the finale. Act 7 depicts Caliborn as trapped within the realm he is created, destined for power but ultimately doomed to it, destroyed in the perfect moment where Calliope, his counterpart, brings his domain to an end.

Caliborn’s realm is the sequence of time loops and set of worlds that brought Lord English into being, but it’s also the narrative Homestuck that depicts those events and worlds. He complains about the narrative Homestuck, argues with its author, and tries to make his own version, just as a demiurge would. (Secretly, because of his cosmic influence, he’s more of an influence than he realizes. He places limits and boundaries on these worlds in the form of the narratives he perpetuates, and is obsessed with sexist ideas, exploitation, and themes of masculinity, importance and power. That the heroes escape this realm in which he has control is also them escaping these narratives that have been placed upon them.

This is the sense in which Dave says “we don’t have arcs.” As I’ve said elsewhere, it’s not Hussie rejecting the idea of giving his characters meaningful stories (this is largely a false impression generated by the Omegapause weirdness), as shown by the fact that Dave himself has one of the best, strongest arcs in the whole story. What Dave means, and what Dave’s arc is about, is that he had to let go of the false ideas, false narratives placed on him by the world (Lord English’s world, the Demiurge’s world) in which he lived. He did this by understanding the abuse he suffered from Bro (a Caliborn-esque figure) was wrong, and by overcoming his internalized homophobia to realize the value of the relationship he’d found with Karkat.

This is a frequent motif in the final pages of Homestuck. Queerness is represented as a way of escaping the patriarchal, conservative God of the Demiurge, and that these revelations about Dave appear in parallel with the final departure from the domain Caliborn controls is no coincidence. Queer relationships and identities build in the ending of Homestuck into what Hussie tongue-in-cheek called “the gay singularity.” This growth in queerness is represented as growth toward meaning, and further queer figures like the non-binary Davepeta appear as idealistic mentors to teach our heroes to understand their cosmic circumstances.

At the same time, the growth from a material world to a world of ideas is represented as the heroes taking on God Tier identities that embody aspects—ideas that are literally the building blocks of the universe. To know yourself as an aspect is to know who you are, and by knowing who you are, you become an idea that is divine. This all takes place at the same time characters grow towards queerness. To know your own queer identity is also to become divine.

And, at the same time, the characters leave the narrative. Everything that was Caliborn’s – his worlds, his time loops and influence— is left behind by the characters as they move into the realm where they are heroes, leaders, and gods. They pass through a door that resembles the weapon that he used, that is his narrative, the weapon shaped like the symbol of Homestuck, the weapon that *is* the narrative Homestuck. It is a weapon against him because he stays behind, on the other side of the door. Lord English can never leave. He’s in the dark pocket of the black hole forever. Caliborn enters a realm that appears to give him power—but he never comes out. He’s trapped by his own limited idea of who he is and what the world should be.

This is a fantastic, culturally resonant, and very Gnostic ending.

And as to Vriska—I’ve seen many people say that Vriska’s retconned revival gives her too much power and agency, but I actually think it strikes the perfect balance. The story understands what she wants. But it’s not on her side. I have a lot more to say about her (perhaps l8r), but here’s the most important thing: Vriska can’t leave, either. She gets what she wants: the ultimate fulfilment of her identity as The Hero. She gets to Kill the Bad Guy. But at a cost she is incapable of recognizing. Like Caliborn, she never gets to go on to be a fulfilled, happy patron of the new universe. She is always on the inside of the door, stuck inside Homestuck. And the fact that we’re asked to observe her breaking off her relationship with Terezi to go out in a blaze of glory? The fact that we’re asked to compare her to another version of herself who’s let go of her ego, whose bond with Terezi is the most important thing in her life? The fact, that in her eyes, she comes up better, but in ours, she comes up short? How incredible is that?

Neither the Hero or the Villain, trapped in their own ideas, trapped by their own ideas, can ever be free.

It’s a pretty good ending, is what I’m saying.

5) Against Apathetic Lazy Troll Hussie

So, back to that perception of Hussie I discussed earlier. The idea that he’s a flippant, irreverent prankster who never cared about bringing his story to a good conclusion.

By now it should be clear why I don’t really buy that line of thinking. The sheer effort put into Homestuck after the pauses began, the level of thematic complexity Homestuck was going for at the end—these belie the idea that he was apathetic or lazy or wanted to piss off his fans. What seems obvious to me was that he was committed. He devoted himself to driving towards an end he was personally satisfied with, whatever anyone else thought of it, and chose to accept the consequences of having to tell it over the long term.

I could see how it might be easy to get the impression that Hussie’s a very frivolous, thoughtless guy, when his in-story self is a ridiculous, flighty orange goofball. But come on. That’s mistaking the persona he uses for comedy with his actual self as a writer. Reading any interview, Q&A session, or discussion with him reveals how much thought he put into every moment of Homestuck, and above all, that he was committed to putting an incredible amount of effort into it from the very beginning.

He was also committed to challenging himself and bettering his work, whether that meant trying new experiments (flash games, new animation styles, splitting panels and dialogue, messing with formatting, letting the villains take over the website, etc., etc., etc…) or rethinking his work to take account of a larger, more diverse perspective, as we saw with the developing queerness and introspection of characters like Dave.

Yet he knew that not all experiments would be received well. He chose to accept that, to not wallow in the familiar but to take on new things regardless of in-the-moment reader reactions. As he put it:

I guess I just believe in sticking to your guns as a creator. It doesn't mean you completely ignore what people have to say or fail to take it under advisement, but pandering and caving into critics for fear of diminished appreciation is the wrong way to go. Staying the course with your vision doesn't mean you'll do everything right, but if included in that vision is serious, concerted exploration, you can only benefit as an artist. Adversaries to this cause should be regarded as villains.

There are two ways to do the "obstinate douche bag" thing as an artist.

One is in vehement defense of stagnation. Some artists I've encountered do this, and it's completely indefensible. It's as low as you can get, creatively speaking.

The other is in vehement defense of exploration. This is just the opposite. This is a posture everyone should strive for, and these artists are the ones people should be most inclined to offer their attention and support.

That's just how I feel about it, and I come from a zero-BS standpoint on it all. This isn't a job for me, and I'll never modify my approach to protect a bottom line. If it was just a job, I guarantee I wouldn't spend every waking hour doing it. It's kind of a strange personal mission I'm on, which I happen to make money from, and that's cool. People are welcome to come along for the ride.

There’s a deep, deep irony to me in the fact that some talk about Act 6 Homestuck like it was a stagnant period in Homestuck’s development, when in fact, it was one of its most creative and experimental periods. This is true both of its structural and visual experiments, where messing with form finally revealed itself to be central to Homestuck’s major themes, and of its storytelling experiments. It’s understandable that diving into the kids’ psychological problems was a shift, and not everyone was down with it, but the very fact it was a shift shows that Hussie was trying new things. It would have been easy for him to stay in a comfortable place doing the same things he did in Act 4 and 5, but instead, he began to ask different questions and take the story someplace new. And honestly? Act 6 took a long time to pay its full dividends, but I loved where we ended up in the end.

(What kept us from enjoying it in the moment? The pauses. Once again the pauses.)

But for me, the thing that most puts the lie to the idea of Lazy Hussie is the sheer fact of Act 6’s existence itself.

Consider how easy it would have been to drop Homestuck completely when things got rough in the middle years. Consider how many webcomic authors would have done just that. I can name many webcomic hiatuses where the webcomic never came back.

But Homestuck did. Not only did it return, it returned spectacularly, scorchingly, with the shocking and dynamic Game Over, with Caliborn’s claymations, with two spectacular, full-length animations, one of them lovingly-hand drawn. It returned with metafictional shenanigans and glorious queer Gnostic themes. Hussie kept going, and kept experimenting all along the way.

This is the furthest thing in the world from laziness.

And the same is true for Hiveswap. It astonishes me how much I’ve heard Hiveswap talked about as a debacle or a betrayal of its fans. Despite having horrible problems dropped on him, the sort that would ruin any other Kickstarter, Hussie spent the next few years working to make sure he met the promises he’d made to his fans. He did.

My dudes, Hiveswap is real. It exists. It delivers on every promise that was made about what it might be: it’s a fun, pretty, point-and-click adventure game telling a new story in the world of Homestuck. It’s creative and clever and updates an old style of gameplay by letting you put things on things to your heart’s content. It’s certainly more accessible than Homestuck, and not yet as structurally complex, but given future installments, there’s plenty of time for it to grow into something rich and thorny. And rather than see this idea go under, from basically nowhere Hussie worked to bring together a small, diverse team of queer artists and creators to make this thing happen.

Again, not exactly laziness.

That’s why it angers me when I see people calling Hiveswap (somehow?) a betrayal of Homestuck fans, or advocating pirating Hiveswap or demanding their money back because it doesn’t live up to some weird set of expectations they placed on it. Maybe during the periods of drought and ambiguous release dates, both for Homestuck and Hiveswap, it made a little sense to be skeptical of Hussie making promises, but now?

It’s basically spitting in the face of a creator who kept working in the most difficult circumstances, and the small, insanely hard-working team who made it possible, over something that they’ve handed to you exactly as you specified right on your doorstep in a gift-wrapped box.

I’m not saying you can’t critique Hussie or his storytelling. He’s definitely a weird dude with a lot of quirks (Which is perhaps the only kind of dude who could have made something as quirky as Homestuck.) I think it’s fair to say he hasn’t always communicated well with the fandom. But the reaction to him these days is totally, ludicrously, out of proportion, beyond anything that would be a useful critique.

A related question is whether Andrew Hussie is burnt out on Homestuck.

Well, maybe?

It’s certainly true that since 2013ish he’s stepped away somewhat from communicating directly with his fans. But 2013 is also the time when Homestuck fandom was at its most massive, its most full of infighting and meaningless arguments, and its most overwhelming to keep up with. I’m not saying I wouldn’t like to hear more of his insights, but it’s pretty understandable that he wanted to step back a bit under the circumstances. That doesn’t necessarily mean he’s burnt out. I mean, he seems to be living his best life, posing glamorously with his fidget spinners and Minion t-shirts. Not exactly hiding in a cave. Rock on, dude.

If he is burnt out on Homestuck, though, that makes what he’s done with Homestuck and Hiveswap all the more impressive. That he brought them this far, and wants to see them keep going and keep doing well, when he could have let them drop unceremoniously a long time ago. If he’s delegating some of the work to others, all the better. I can think of nothing better for an artist who’s burnt out and ready to move on than to find people he can trust to keep the things he started going into the future, and that, I think is exactly what we have in What Pumpkin, Viz, and Homestuck’s artistic team.

But even to assume that he’s burnt out is to presume a lot about his mental state from some very scant data. By many other indications, he wants to keep engaging with Homestuck. There’s an Epilogue to come—a capstone for those last few ambiguities surrounding the timeline, John and Terezi. And he’s getting the Homestuck books re-published with new commentary through Viz—so maybe that’s where he wants to have his conversations with his audience. And he’s still the creative director of Hiveswap itself. It’s very possible he’s not burned out—if anything, wants to keep building the world he created in Homestuck and seeing where he can take it next.

Ultimately, I think people’s ideas about Andrew Hussie say a lot more about their lingering feelings about the ending of Homestuck—a backlash brought on by the pauses he had to work with—than anything about Hussie himself.

6) The Conversation Around Homestuck

Homestuck is a goddamn triumph.

There are certainly critiques I could make of it. But they pale in light of what Homestuck is: is one of the most rich, genre-bending, experimental, character-driven, hilarious, innovative, metafictional, transcendent, optimistic works on the Internet—to say nothing of how it dwarfs much of the rest of literature.

Ultimately, I think Hussie was right: as an archive, as the story it is from beginning to end, Homestuck stands. It’s a rich, meaningful work with a meaningful finale, and it’s right there to be read by anyone who wants to read it. In that sense, Homestuck was and Homestuck is. It doesn’t really need me to defend it. Nor does Andrew Hussie.

So why did I write all this? Why did I write everything I’ve written here on this blog?

Well, mostly for Homestuck’s readers. For fans like myself.

Because I still see people who came away from Homestuck feeling totally burned and abandoned by its creator, when that was anything but the truth. Because I still see people who feel like they can’t escape an awful negativity about this comic, about the ending of something they passionately loved. I want them to see that it doesn’t have to feel that way.

And because I want Homestuck criticism to be better. Because I see prominent bloggers, some of whom I really respect, taking so little of this stuff into account. I want to see people talk about Homestuck’s place in literature, in internet culture, without discounting how circumstances shaped how it was perceived. I want to get away from a lazy cynicism—that cynicism everywhere online—about whether stories can be meaningful at all. A cynicism that Homestuck is the very antithesis of through its themes of transcendence and hope.

I think for some people, Homestuck is that weird old obsession they cringe at. The ghost of teenage fandoms past. Which is fine. It’s reasonable to want to move on. But it frustrates me when I see the same cynical, cringing attitude affecting how people feel—or feel like they’re allowed to feel without social stigma—about the work Homestuck itself. I’m not interested in cringe culture.

I frankly don’t have time for it when Homestuck’s as good as it is.

Don’t get me wrong, I want Homestuck to be criticized, too. I want to hear what its flaws are. I think that’s also an important part of the conversation. But don’t tell me it’s a pointless, apathetic work, that it’s just the product of laziness. Because we know better than that by now. Because we need a better conversation than that. Don’t tell me that Homestuck doesn’t have Gnostic themes. Tell me how it uses them, and how it could use them better. Don’t tell me Homestuck’s meaningless. Tell me how it strives to be meaningful—because it does, in every aspect of its storytelling—and tell me where it succeeds, and where it fails.

That’s the kind of conversation I want to have about Homestuck.

You may not agree with the things I’ve pointed to here—you may think that Homestuck’s ending is much more flawed than I do. But that’s totally fair. All I want to say is this:

If you were holding off from letting yourself enjoy Homestuck, or if you once enjoyed it and wish you could enjoy it again, or if the experience of the ending left you feeling disappointed and frustrated and burned out…

Give it another read, especially Act 6 and 7.

You might be surprised how much you like what you find.

#homestuck #homestuck ending #homestuck analysis #homestuck criticism #andrew hussie #off-the-cuff homestuck thoughts extravaganza 2017 #now in 2018 #in defense of homestuck #homestuck fandom #understanding homestuck #ending themes #understanding the ending #serial vs archival reading #homestuck is good actually #against lazy cynicsm #towards a better conversation #keep rising

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natsthinkitythinkthinkthonk · 6 years

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ANN Interview: Made in Abyss Composer Kevin Penkin

This is all originally from an Anime News Network interview.

Interview: Made in Abyss Composer Kevin Penkin

Interview Info: October 7th, 2014 By Callum May for Anime News Network

As a person who is aspiring to become a score composer (kind of an unrealistic dream that I can’t seem to let go), I found this really, really interesting. I left a lot of stuff in because I feel like there’s so much to unpack, and most of the information is interesting to me.

I did edit a few things out (mostly not music related), and I put in some square brackets for the sake of explanation and context.

It appears that all of your anime soundtrack work has been with Kinema Citrus. How did you come to work with them?

I met Kinema Citrus when we were attached to the same project called "Under the Dog"[...] Since then, we've enjoyed a wonderful relationship on other projects such as Norn9 and most recently, Made in Abyss.

Do you expect to be working on anime outside of Kinema Citrus in the future?

That would be lovely. It's not entirely up to me, but that would be lovely. I'm very grateful to get any work in anime, as I'm very, very passionate about this industry. If I do get the opportunity to work on another project from any company, I would consider it to be a great privilege.

What was your first reaction to Made in Abyss when you were approached with the project? How much of it did you get to read?

I was given the first 4 books as source material to read and was immediately taken by the world that Tsukushi Akihito had created. The early stages of production were just me going through the books and finding interesting scenes or artwork to write music to.

Who did you have the most contact with on the Made in Abyss staff? What sort of questions did you ask?

I have a music director named Hiromitsu Iijima, who I would talk to on a daily basis. Every couple of weeks after a large chunk of the soundtrack had been written, we'd set up a meeting with Kojima-san [Director, Storyboard, and Episode Director] and Ogasawara-san [Animation Producer who works with Kinema Citrus] to discuss the current state of the soundtrack. We'd discuss if there were any points of concern or if anything needed to be changed. We essentially repeated that process until we were ready to record, mix, and finalize the music.

What sort of instructions and materials were you given in regards to making tracks for Made in Abyss?

In addition to all the manga books, I got a lot of background and concept art that I could reference. Trying to match the visual colour palette and the musical "colour" palette was really important to me. For example, looking at how the foregrounds and backgrounds were so juxtaposed gave me ideas such as writing for a small ensemble of instruments, but recorded in a large space. This was meant to act as a metaphor for Riko and Reg exploring in this humongous, expansive cave system.

Could you elaborate on the idea of developing a musical "colour" palette? How do colours and music correlate?

It might be best for me to give some examples. Starting more broadly with Reg, he's a character made up of both organic and mechanical body parts. So combining organic and mechanical sound sources when writing for Reg felt perfectly natural.

Talking more specifically about colour correlation, there is a lot of information in colour that allows us to perceive essential things such as relationships and distances between objects. The sound has this as well. Depending on how you combine the essential components of sound (pitch, timbre, harmony, loudness, etc.) and controlling how they either complement or clash against each other is going to result in a specific listening experience.

“Depths of the Abyss” is another example of the musical key slowly “ascending” over time to act as a sonic metaphor for the Abyss rising up to surround and engulf our main characters. There's the flip side to this as well. The title track “Made in Abyss” features descending string passages to represent Riko and Reg's descent into the world of the Abyss. I've personally found that thinking about these sorts of concepts can be very helpful when trying to establish the palette of sounds (colours) that you think will complement and/or enhance what's being displayed on-screen.

How much did you know about how your music would be used? Did you know that Underground River would be used to introduce the world in a montage just six minutes into the first episode?

Syncing music to anime is a slightly different process than what I've experienced [...] In the limited amount of anime that I've done, I've typically been instructed to create music away from the picture, which is then matched to the desired scene(s) at a later stage of production. This might contribute to why a lot of anime music can feel like a music video at times. From what I've experienced and from what I can research, I've seen directors take large chunks of time out of an episode to let the music take over so that the audience can “breathe". Underground River is a good example of this. [In episode one] you're introduced to characters, their motivations, world building, monsters and action all in a very short amount of time. Taking a minute or two to let the viewer digest all this can be very effective, and music can help with that.

You're also known for your work on Necrobarista and Kieru, two Australian indie games. What draws you to working on Aussie games, even after making your debut internationally?

[Being an Aussie], there's a lot of pride in how interesting and unique Australian indie games are. I've always had a connection to games and Australia. So even though I'm currently living in the UK, the fact that I'm still able to work on games with friends who are living back home is something really special.

It's not common to see an Australian in the credits for anime. Do you think musicians from outside of Japan are becoming more common?

I [...] grew up watching Dragon Ball Z on TV. There are actually two scores composed for that series depending on [whether you are watching dub or sub]. So I actually grew up listening to Bruce Faulconer's music for DBZ, not Shunsuke Kikuchi's original score.

[In regards to other foreign anime score composers] There are also other examples such as Blood+ with Marc Mancina, Gabriele Roberto with Zetman in 2012, and Evan Call has done quite a few things as well [like Violet Evergarden]. So I think while it may be becoming more frequent to see musicians from outside of Japan being attached to anime projects.

How would you say composing for games differs to composing for an anime series like Made in Abyss?

Speaking for myself, composing for games, anime, or whatever typically starts the same. I feel that if you're able to nail the concept and/or tone of the project, that's a big part of the process already completed. Then it's just up to the individual needs of the project. Games are typically approached from an interactive point of view. If it's film or TV, you need to know if you're writing to picture or if you can write with no time contractions like I described before. You sort of go from there really.

How would you describe that concept/tone of Made in Abyss?

Made in Abyss offered the perfect opportunity to get really specific with instrumentation. We had analog synthesizers, field recordings, vocal samples, and much more that were heavily manipulated to create distinct electro-acoustic textures. Deciding where to record was also a really important discussion, and we ended up recording at a studio in Vienna.

[It was] a huge, state of the art recording facility just outside central Vienna. I asked for a custom chamber orchestra comprised of three violins, three violas, two celli, one double bass, two flutes, two clarinets, one bassoon, two french horns, one trumpet, one trombone, and one tuba. Totaling 19 musicians. Each musician had their own “solo" part, meaning that there was up to 19 different “lines” being played at the same time during a piece of music.

The concept behind such a setup was to represent the small company of characters exploring the Abyss. Everyone's in this massive underground cave system, so I felt having a small group of soloists in a space designed to fit over 130 musicians was the perfect sonic metaphor for this. It just so happened that we were also working with some insanely good musicians and an unbelievable technical team as well.

If you were given the chance to collaborate on a soundtrack with one composer working in anime today, who would it be?

That's an interesting question. To be honest, I think I'd rather be an understudy of someone really experienced, rather than write side by side with them. If I could be a fly on the wall while Cornelius was writing Ghost in the Shell Arise, or Yoko Kanno while she was writing Terror in Resonance, that would be so, so informative. That said, Flying Lotus just got announced as the Blade Runner 2022 composer so I'd do anything to get in on that, even though it comes out in a few days (laughs).

Made in Abyss is one of the most highly regarded anime of the year. What do you think about the reaction to it?

I can't tell you how happy I am about the reaction to Made in Abyss. Writing the soundtrack was tough. The music is experimental in nature, and it required a lot of time and effort from many, many people. Everyone came together to make this work, and I'm over the moon with how it turned out.

#made in abyss #anime composer #anime news network #anime interview #score composer #score composer interview #ann interview

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tearlessrain · 6 years

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so this turned into Scorpion King: Book of Souls Liveblog Part 1, because I got started late. witness a bunch of people trying to make one man’s considerable hotness singlehandedly carry an entire hour and a half long movie with very limited success under the cut.

I do want to state right up front that there’s only one reason I’m watching this and that reason is that for some reason zach mcgowan is the protagonist, so I’m not really up to date on the whole mummy/scorpion king franchise, the last one I saw was the one with all the jackal dudes and that was a while ago. so I have no idea what’s going on.

oh good they’re just going to town with the exposition, very thoughtful

so if the sword was forged in the fires of hell by anubis then who the heck did they fight when they were taking on the jackal headed dudes because I kinda assumed

are these two series actually related or

holy shit this is so Extra already look at this shit

y’all this is my jam I am living right now

also as people following my art blog may note, I am a huge fan of black and gold aesthetics. this movie is really just ticking off all my boxes right off the bat, it’s terrible, but five stars.

they’re REALLY going to town with the exposition

sword forged in the fires of hell that condemns souls to “the neverending darkness” and must be somehow destroyed... are we talking about anubis or sauron here.

this is just lord of the rings, but bad and with a sword. lord of the sword.

okay prologue is over and some dudes have smashed their way into a tomb. if the last however many mummy movies have taught me anything it’s that this might potentially be a bad idea

I love how they’re just not even setting up any of the characters we’re just diving right in I’m getting strong “yeah you all know the drill by now” vibes here

#squadgoals

really though the gal on the left is pretty badass, she hasn’t done or said a single thing but I respect her and her bootleg Xena vibe

and like shoutout for putting at least one actual black guy in egypt I guess

so I guess the one in the middle is... psychic or something? not that “hey if you plunder this blatantly cursed tomb it might be bad” requires psychic powers to know but

I mean that giant black sarcophagus they found recently in real life turned out fine I’m sure this will be great go nuts dude

uh oh it’s the fang of sauron anubis

oh that doesn’t seem good, but it’s actually the better option since for a second there I thought there were pulling a “black guy dies first” in ancient goddamn egypt

wait we’re still doing exposition okay the narrator is back. hi narrator I missed you.

look I know it’s campy and all but can we take a sec to unironically appreciate how wicked COOL this guy looks with his glowing eyes and crap. this movie is just so satisfying to look at, every single shot has been peak aesthetic

“SEND THE BIRD” and then it’s actually just a regular bird that was anticlimactic

HOLY GREENSCREEN BATMAN

holy FUCK WE’RE ONLY JUST NOW AT THE TITLE SEQUENCE WHAT

okay I guess now we’re going to ACTUALLY start the movie, third time’s a charm

and we’re off to a fantastic start my friends

and judging by the choices of the cameraman in this scene I can tell they’re trying desperately to distract me from the fact that the dialogue sounds like it was generated by a neural network that was fed several dozen mediocre fantasy novels.

it’s working.

I am being personally attacked. god.

oh no some people on horses are coming I assume from the background music that this is a bad thing

OH it’s bootleg Xena and her merry band of deeply mediocre extras okay

I understand the adorable small child’s father must die but must it be at the hands of the worst mediocre extra. seriously he’s been on screen for five seconds and I already hate him.

I guess the protagonist’s name is Matthias, other writers might have let us know that when he was introduced, but these guys know damn well that it literally does not matter what his name is. they could have had her ride up and be like “we’re looking for a man named Jebediah Switchboard McDougal” and anyone who’s voluntarily watching this movie in the first place would just be like “that’s fair”

yeah just in case you weren’t sold after the blacksmithing or the hunting scenes, let’s have him just singlehandedly take down half a dozen ninjas in less than a minute. just fuck me up

oh shit they shot him

oh shit they shot him again

they’re just boromir-ing the hell out of this dude

and yet he’s still going to town on those ninjas

NO NOT THE ADORABLE CHILD WHY WOULD YOU DO THIS

I’ve decided I don’t like bootleg Xena after all

it’s a good thing he’s got three arrows embedded in his torso because that is the worst cage ever. it’s made of like. bamboo and string. have you seen this man’s arms how did they expect that to effectively contain him.

whoa it’s... BOOTLEG XENA 2.0: GOOD GUY EDITION

or not. she didn’t free him or anything she just killed his original captors and then took off with the cage with him in it

no I think she is good she’s... healing him? by... getting scorpions to sting the hell out of him? has the FDA approved this.

I’m sorry I can’t take this scene seriously the background music is way too close to the “ooga chakas” from hooked on a feeling. also the sheer degree to which they’re pulling a reverse male gaze here is kinda overshooting sexy straight into unintentionally funny. I mean I know this is the entire reason I’m watching this insanity but like even I think this is excessive.

“the scorpion king escaped” that is giving him way too much credit he was stolen by the superior bootleg Xena.

and in case NONE of the previous things drew your attention away from the lack of a plot, here’s just straight up nudity because why not.

I thought I had a thing for zach mcgowan but I’ve got nothing on this cameraman.

also there’s some kind of “reluctant chosen one king” thing going on I guess but like they literally couldn’t have put less effort into it

I haven’t heard people this concerned about what the moon is doing since I left evergreen state college

aaand apparently he can see and speak to... ghosts now? ghosts that spit thousands of arrows from the sky? know what why not I’ll accept literally anything at this point.

oh they aren’t ghosts they’re just really sneaky dudes

it’s a shame jebediah switchboard’s one and only weakness is extremely shitty cages because he sure ends up in them a lot

hmmmm we’re getting some uncomfortable racist undertones and misogyny in one go okay. not worse than I would expect from a movie of this.... caliber, but I’m not thrilled, especially since this whole situation has yet to have a single actual point to it.

actually okay it’s veered quickly away from “rudyard kipling-esque Vague Native Tribe Encounter” and into... some kind of weird mad max thing mixed with a D&D campaign that’s gone wildly off the rails. but they’re on thin fucking ice.

I really appreciate that matthias is approaching this situation with exactly the same strategy with which I play skyrim, which is “sneak up on everybody one at a time even though there are a ton of them and that shouldn’t be possible, shoot them all with a bow you looted off one of them”

and now they’re just... suddenly free and back on their horses, then matthias had a vague fake deep exchange with the leader and they rode away. there literally was no reason for that entire interlude. nothing happened, there wasn’t character development or anything. this godforsaken movie could have been ten minutes shorter.

“the plot is down there, just past that greenscreen” is what I heard there.

I’m sorry I’m dying for some reason all I’m getting from this visual is “wait are you saying the panel is all the way on the other side of the convention center” like the costumes are just mediocre enough that in bright light they don’t look like they’re actually actors in a movie.

the moon’s rising. but I can’t for the life of me remember why that’s important. she’s got some kinda egyptian steampunk millennium rod though.

okay the lenses must align with the cipher. did anyone mention a cipher before who knows.

good job matthias you solved the moon puzzle and your prize is a metric ton of blue jello.

all right through the jello portal they go. to find the book of souls, probably.

in this case I actually do need more exposition. are we just not gonna explain ancient egyptian jello narnia. no. okay.

stop forcing zach mcgowan to be quippy I know all the cool movies are doing it but this is neither the time nor the place nor the actor for it.

oh my god they’re being attacked by a rock golem thing and I don’t think a screenshot can fully capture how bad the cgi is. not of the rock monster itself, but trying to integrate it with the real actors and set pieces was... oof.

okay a mostly naked woman has risen out of some nearby water and called off the rock golem with no explanation. why not.

neither of them looks into this so much as confused as hell

honestly, same.

oh god no they’re trying to make the rock golem be the comic relief this movie never needed. please don’t. you can barely handle writing the plot relevant dialogue now’s not the time to get fancy. I take it back, trying to make zach mcgowan be quippy was actually somehow not the worst option.

she IS the book of souls!

okay that’s a pretty cool visual I’ll give them that. digging the iridescent moon tattoo.

and that seems like a reasonable stopping point because I started this kind of late and have to get up for class in the morning. tune in tomorrow for, I assume, more of zach mcgowan running around in various states of undress while absolutely nothing coherent happens around him.

#tearless liveblogs #to be completely honest I'm not even sure what it is about this guy #like as you are all painfully aware I tend to lean way more toward androgyny but like #apparently I'll also take 'the concept of a panther but applied to a human being'#seriously though he cannot do the quippy marvel thing just accept that and don't try to force it

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