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aeithalian · 11 months

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On Apollo and fatal flaws

Vague question for my fellow apollogists out there: what do we think Apollo's fatal flaw is? I write this realizing that, in all five books of the series, all told from Apollo's point of view, we never actually have it explicitly stated, either from Apollo's knowledge and refusal to share (which, strangely, seems to me like something he would tell us), or from him not actually knowing, either.

Simply stated, a fatal flaw is any kind of weakness of a hero, god or mortal, that can be exploited and can cause the downfall of that character. That being said, we already know some that generally scope out the larger range of what they can be:

Percy: excessive personal loyalty

Annabeth: hubris/pride

Nico: holding grudges

Thalia: ambition

Leo: feeling inferior

Piper: low self-esteem

Luke: wrath

Jason: hesitation and excessive deliberation

And we are certain that immortals have flaws like these, too. Although it isn't explicitly stated in canon what Zeus' fatal flaw is, it's exceedingly obvious that it's paranoia and hunger for power, as well as his sexual infidelity.

I feel like we can easily knock some flaws off the list already:

Holding grudges is off the list for the main reason that, if there's one thing Apollo oozes, it's forgiveness, and the fact that he is always ready to give second chances to people who have wronged him and the world (Lityerses, Luguselwa, Meg, etc.)

For the same reason, I'm going to knock off wrath. Yes, he has moments of rage, but so does everybody else! It's human nature, and, as stated before, it's usually overshadowed by Apollo's choice to let go of that anger and choose forgiveness instead.

Ambition is an interesting one, but it's not at all something that really comes up in the series to the point where it ends up being powerful enough to be his fatal flaw. He rarely seeks power he didn't already have before, especially when you consider he is Zeus' most powerful son, and one of the most powerful gods period. Why would he need more power? Unless, of course, you choose to point out that one time he tried to overthrow Zeus, but I'd argue he was acting more out of a place of 'hey please be better at your job' than 'I want your title and position', which actually falls more under Poseidon's motivations in that myth.

Interestingly, there's a certain aspect of Apollo's character in the myths that totally screws the pooch in terms of this discussion, and that's the fact that Apollo, throughout the stories of Ancient Greece, is a typical example of perfection. Literally, he's written to be virtually flawless, the paragon of young men, and (in the context of Ancient Greek culture) doesn't have many moments of rage, selfishness, or paranoia, or at least, not as many as other gods (looking at you, Artemis).

HOWEVER, as much as the myths seemingly act like he doesn't have a glaringly obvious flaw, we as a part of Apollo's inner circle/audience know he's got one - I mean, look at him! It's in there somewhere, nobody's perfect, and I don't think anybody's pretending as such for Apollo. What irks me is that we know Apollo is not lacking in general character flaws, but there is one, beyond a doubt, that shapes his inner core irreversibly. And we don't know it.

Thankfully, though, we've got five books of content that might help us come to a conclusion.

The Hidden Oracle, being the beginning of the story and the beginning of Apollo's character development, is where we would get an inkling of what Apollo wants us to think his fatal flaw is. To us, Apollo appears vain, self-centered, and, frankly annoying. And he does these things on purpose. Or at least, he tells us these things.

That's the thing: if you look past all the fluff Apollo spits out to the audience throughout the first majority of the book, before his children are taken into the forest, you'd find that his dialogue, aka how the other characters of the story hear and see him, doesn't really reflect that. Most of the annoying, self-centered brattiness is only on the page, and not as obvious in his personal interactions (not saying they're not there, but it's so much worse in his internal monologue). So, what does this tell us?

That those aren't his fatal flaws. He's very good at pretending that they are, probably because, as I've read several other metas very cleverly explain, that this is what gods are supposed to be, and, Apollo, in his desperation be his father's golden child again (or, also to avoid his wrath, take that how you will) has built up a very elaborate mask for thousands of years, because that is what he is not. He's trying to be glossed over in the vast sea that is the gods, and it's not really working because, well, he got turned into a mortal. Again.

As we pass through books 2 and 3, we're still not quite past the whole "pretending to be petty and self-serving because this is what I am supposed to be as dictated by the laws of my immortal people and my father". That, almost certainly, doesn't come until the latter half of The Burning Maze. So it's further safe to assume that our best guess as to his fatal flaw probably coincides with his more honest moments with the audience, eg. books 4 and 5.

Now, I know a popular common answer to this whole question is that it's his ego and his pride. But here's the thing: as we move on to the second half of the series, we get an interesting revealing of Apollo's perception of himself. To put it plainly: Apollo is not a narcissist, as much as he pretends to be (see the above points). Honestly, he might actually hate himself and what he's become as he learns to take a more critical view of himself as the series goes on. Drawn in direct antithesis to his moments in the first two books, when he tells us that he assumes that anybody he meets is willing to help him, after the peak of his development (marked by his promise and Jason's subsequent death), this isn't the case. That's why I'm pretty okay with putting pride and ego towards the bottom of my list of possible fatal flaws for him.

Honestly, if I didn't know any better as we reach the end of the series, I'd say Apollo's fatal flaw might fall somewhere closer to poor self-esteem, insecurity and self-doubt, but for some reason, that doesn't quite fit. I'd argue that a lot of those feelings probably stem from being stuck in the inadequate body of a mortal with a tiny fraction of his usual power - of course he's going to feel like that. That, and it's almost the direct opposite of what his flaw is perceived to be by other sources, so it feels like too large a leap to me.

I'm deliberating from my point, which is this: I still have no clue what his fatal flaw is.

It's not:

narcissism

pride

OR on the other side of the spectrum:

low-self esteem

self-doubt

OR the list of things we knocked off earlier:

holding grudges

wrath

ambition

And when you compare to other characters he might also be like, I would argue he's a totally different animal. The only character I could see a similarity with is Percy. But, again, it's just not the same. Percy's flaw, excessive personal loyalty, still doesn't really fit because, while I'd argue that Apollo's never really put in a situation where he's had to choose to save the life a mortal friend over his task of restoring the Oracles, I do believe he has a strong sense of duty. No, I don't think he would sacrifice Meg's life to do that job, but it's not something we see him forced to pick between (that I can think of, at least). I like to think that, on one hand, Percy would flat-out refuse to do his duty to save the life of a friend out of principle, whereas Apollo might find a clever loophole to save the friend, do the duty, and end up doing harm to himself. If anything, while Percy would be ready to burn the world to save a friend, Apollo would be ready to burn himself first.

That, I think, is our biggest indicator. Apollo loves his friends and the world. He wears his heart on his sleeve, this is something the Triumvirate exploits to no end.

Athena tells Percy something in the PJO series (the Titan's Curse, I think?) and says that the most dangerous fatal flaws are the ones that are good in moderation. And, of course, Apollo is a main character, so naturally his fatal flaw will fall under this category.

I think Apollo's fatal flaw is of the same breed as Percy's, but isn't really the same creature. I'm sure there's a more eloquent way to put this, but it seems to me that his fatal flaw has something to do with his tendency to be self-sacrificing, easily forgiving, and empathetic. He's been stabbed in the back several times and every time chooses instead to show trust and camaraderie, to see the best in people, and give them another chance to prove themselves: with Meg, Crest, Lityerses, Luguselwa, Meg's adoptive siblings, and many, many more. That seems very dangerous in the wrong situation, yes? Especially someone in Apollo's position - there are plenty of bad people who would be ready to take advantage of this.

And what is a story if not the hero learning to overcome their fatal flaw? And, really what is the Trials of Apollo all about? How do we end? What choices does Apollo make for the future at the conclusion of the Tower of Nero that directly contradict his overwhelming urge to choose forgiveness and let others try again?

The Tower of Nero, Chapter 36

At the end of any good epic story, the hero learns to overcome their weaknesses and flaws and do the right thing regardless. For Apollo, this comes when he refuses to forgive one person: Zeus. Apollo ends his pentalogy with coming to an understanding of himself and his relationship with his father, learning to overcome that tendency see the best in everyone, and realize that not everyone can choose to change for the better like Apollo has.

EDIT: a masterlist of my other metas

#thank u for coming to my ted talk #trials of apollo #toa #apollogists #riordanverse

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astrowaffles · 5 months

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The Final Incident: Thirteen

General Audiences | Fluff, Coming Out

"Satoru?"

"Hmm?" Gojo looked up from a pile of marking. Megumi could just spot a diagram of a knife on the top piece of paper, which Gojo had drawn a smiley face next to in sparkly purple gel pen. "How can I help you, Megs?"

"Uh, do you have a minute?"

Probably sensing Megumi's nerves, Gojo swept the papers dramatically off the table and gestured to the seat next to him. "Always."

Smiling a little at Gojo's theatrics, Megumi sat down on the chair Gojo pulled out for him. "Um. Well."

"Take your time, I've got loads," Gojo assured him.

"You'd say that even if you didn't," Megumi accused.

"Well, I'm the strongest, aren't I? If I didn't have time, I'd make some."

"Can you even do that?"

"My dear Megumi, I have yet to find anything I can't do. So, take as long as you need."

Taking a deep breath, Megumi began with "Do you remember that guy with the elbows?"

"That is not what I thought you were going to say."

Megumi hated standing out.

It didn't matter where he was, or what he was doing, or who he was with, he wanted to just blend in and go about his own business. If there wasn't any reason to stand out, why should he? He only ever went out on a limb for something that was worth it, like throwing racists into canals, and things of that ilk.

Gojo was the complete opposite. If there was any standing out to do, Gojo would happily do it - whether it was being born with white hair and blue eyes, standing literally head and shoulders above the crowd, or using his incredibly irritating personality to be very loud in public. He was a terrible person to be around if you just wanted to get on with things.

Unfortunately for Megumi, they lived together.

"Can you just sit down?" Megumi said irritably, tugging on Gojo's sleeve to try and pull him back onto the bench they had both been sitting on. "You don't need to stand up for Tsumiki to see you."

"But I want to make sure!" Gojo argued, waving towards the school building. "Look! There she is!"

Tsumiki was on the steps of the building, arms full of rolls of paper from her art club. Megumi slightly raised his hand in a half-hearted wave, which she returned before hurrying up to them.

"Sorry for making you come all the way out here," she apologised as soon as she reached them.

"Don't be silly," Gojo chastised, pulling all the rolls out of her arms. "We're happy to help you carry things, aren't we, Megs?"

Megumi hated agreeing with Gojo. "Sure."

Tsumiki handed him a small bag. "Can you hold that? I need to run back for my school bag."

"Sure," Megumi repeated. "Hurry up, though."

"Yeah, yeah." Tsumiki rolled her eyes before beginning to run back into the school.

"Where's she running to?" Gojo asked.

"Her class, probably."

"Hm." Gojo sat back down on the bench, but stretched his legs out. They reached the edge of the pavement, meaning pedestrians would have to either jump over his shins or walk on the road.

"Do you have no regard for other people?"

"Nope." Gojo popped the 'p'. "There's no-one here, anyway, except for that loser over there."

He was pointing at one of Megumi's classmates - a nice kid, if quiet.

"That's Yasu."

"Oh, you know him?"

"I guess. I know of him, anyway."

"Hm." Gojo was staring now, which was making it weird. What kind of adult stared at middle schoolers?

Megumi prodded Gojo's temple. "Oi. Don't stare at him."

"Oh, my bad," Gojo grinned. "Didn't realise you were a jealous man, Gumi."

"What."

"What was the kid's name? Yahoo?"

"Yasu," Megumi sighed, getting a sense of where this was going.

"Why haven't I heard of him before?"

"Why would you?"

"Because you have a crush on him, don't you?"

Megumi stared at Gojo, absolutely flabbergasted. "What in hell's name-"

"Sssshhh, don't yell!"

That was another thing about Gojo. He annoyed the hell out of Megumi.

Megumi waited until Yasu walked far away, then lowered his voice to a violent whisper. "Why would that even occur to you??" he hissed.

"I dunno, you seemed kind of defensive!" Gojo whispered back.

"I just didn't want you staring like some kind of creep!"

"It wasn't creepy, I was just curious!"

"It was creepy, and you shouldn't be curious about some random kid!"

"Aha, but as we have just discovered, he isn't just some random kid, he's your-"

"What are we whispering about?" Tsumiki asked, before Megumi could kill Gojo.

“Nothing,” they chorused. Megumi glared, but Gojo was already standing up, arms full of paper.

“Looks like I can’t hold your hand on the way back, Megs,” he teased, dancing away from Megumi’s attempted kidney jab. “Hey! No need to get violent over it!”

“There is so much need to get violent over it. So, so much,” Megumi sighed, falling into step beside Tsumiki as Gojo strode ahead. “Do you ever wish he’d just … tone it down?”

“Regularly,” Tsumiki laughed. “But if it makes him happy to look conspicuous, who are we to stop him?”

“Uh, his wards?”

“You’re adopted, Megumi. His child.”

“Even more so, then. I am well within my rights to stop him.”

“Well, go ahead and try,” Tsumiki offered.

Megumi watched as Gojo attempted to kick a pigeon, laughing manically when it flew away.

“Yeah, I don’t think there’s any saving him.”

Tsumiki laughed again. “God, you’re so similar. Toru was only asking me the other day if I could get you to tone down the emo – his words, not mine!” she added hastily, as the murderous gleam returned to Megumi's eyes.

“Oh I know it’s his words,” he said. “But in the end, who’s the one wearing all black?”

“You?”

“Well- yeah, me, but also him.”

Gojo started walking backwards so he could watch them from where he was, several meters in front. “Ooh, if looks could kill I’d be dead, Megumi~!”

“God, I wish!” Megumi called back.

“Words hurt, kid!”

“Stop yelling,” Tsumiki told them, gently elbowing Megumi. “We’re walking past people’s houses, you know.”

“Whoopsies!” Gojo slapped a hand over his own mouth. “Sorry, Miki.”

“Let’s just go home,” Megumi sighed. He started to speed up, trying to catch up to Gojo, who had stopped in the middle of the sidewalk.

"What's up?" asked Tsumiki, observing a slightly dazed look on their guardian's face.

Gojo just pointed across the street - at a man, walking past. "Isn't he pretty?"

Megumi face palmed. "You can't just stop in the street to stare at people!"

"But he's pretty!"

"So what?!"

Yep. As frustrating as everything else was, Gojo also stood out in a way that was much less obvious: he was gay.

"You can do your little rant at home," Megumi added, beginning to push Gojo away before the poor man on the other side of the road (admittedly, very pretty) realised Gojo was staring. "He doesn't want to hear you waxing poetic about his eyelashes."

"Well, maybe he does," Tsumiki considered, "But I don't think Megumi's going to let him."

Gojo let himself be pushed along the sidewalk, occasionally looking back over his shoulder until his crush (of a few seconds) turned the corner. Then he properly stood up and started striding again, dreamy look still on his face.

Megumi and Tsumiki exchanged glances, Tsumiki sighing fondly. This wasn't a rare occurrence.

One Year Later

It's not that I have a problem with Gojo being gay, Megumi mused, watching Gojo watch TV in their rainbow-flagged apartment. But, there was a small part of him, deep down, that felt uncomfortable when Gojo stared at a guy, or gushed over an actor on the TV. Maybe because it was his dad? Or because most people thought being gay was weird?

Megumi didn't think that, though. He could almost sympathise; that actor had genuinely had beautiful fingernails. He couldn't sympathise with the staring on the street though, or the five second crushes. How could you like someone if you didn't know them?

"Ooh, Megumi, look at his elbow!!" Gojo squealed from the sofa.

This was getting ridiculous.

"When did I become the guy you tell about your crushes?" Megumi complained, trying to walk past Gojo before he could catch him and force him to watch whatever show it was that had all the men with nice elbows.

"Just thought you might relate," Gojo shrugged, and stuck an (irritatingly long) leg out to stop Megumi walking past. "Stop! Watch with me!!"

"I don't relate, and I don't want to." Megumi thought better of stepping over the leg, so started going around the back of the sofa to try passing by the other way.

"Oh, do you not like elbows?"

"I have no particular feelings about elbows."

"And what do you have particular feelings about? And since when did you talk like that?"

"I've always talked like that, and I don't have particular feelings about anything- let me get past!" Megumi exclaimed, as Gojo quickly shifted to the other end of the sofa so he could stop Megumi leaving again.

"Hm," he said, looking unconvinced. "Come back when you've had a think." He moved his arm to let Megumi pass.

"I won't," said Megumi, and left. Some rainbow bunting fell down as he slammed the door.

His room was the only place safe from the pride parade, as Tsumiki had graciously allowed Gojo to hang a flag there too.

"It's just June," Megumi muttered, throwing himself down on the beanbag. Why was this irritating him so much? Why did it matter to him where Gojo hung his rainbow flags, and whose elbows Gojo commented on?

Why did it bother him that Gojo thought Megumi would understand?

He didn't understand. Yeah, sometimes guys looked pretty. But did that really matter? Was that all it took for people to fall for each other? In which case, why had it never happened to Megumi? Even Leonardo di Caprio in Titanic hadn't got to him until they'd gotten halfway through the film, much to Gojo's horror.

Megumi turned over to bury his face in the beanbag. He didn't want to be uncomfortable around Gojo; he never was before, so why had it suddenly started now?

But, if life had taught him anything, it's 'when in doubt, ask Google'.

Megumi turned on his computer.

"Satoru?"

"Uh, do you have a minute?"

Probably sensing Megumi's nerves, Gojo swept the papers dramatically off the table and gestured to the seat next to him. "Always."

Smiling a little at Gojo's theatrics, Megumi sat down on the chair Gojo pulled out for him. "Um. Well."

"Take your time, I've got loads," Gojo assured him.

"You'd say that even if you didn't," Megumi accused.

"Well, I'm the strongest, aren't I? If I didn't have time, I'd make some."

"Can you even do that?"

"My dear Megumi, I have yet to find anything I can't do. So, take as long as you need."

Taking a deep breath, Megumi began with "Do you remember that guy with the elbows?"

"That is not what I thought you were going to say."

"Whatever. Do you remember him?"

"Vaguely."

"Do you remember saying you thought I would relate?"

"Yeah...? Is this going where I think it's going?"

"Toru. I'm not gay."

"Oh. It wasn't going where I thought it was."

"I'm pansexual."

Normally in this sort of situations, there's a kind of awkward silence that descends over the kitchen. Perhaps the parent will stand up, pace around a little, and look confused; the kid will sit and look uncomfortable, before launching into a speech about how "I'm still me!"

Gojo wouldn't be upset, disappointed, or angry, Megumi was sure. Some minor confusion, maybe, or a "are you sure you're not just gay?"

What Megumi didn't expect was for Gojo to jump up from his seat, arms wide open, and scream "AAAAAAA!!! I'M SO FUCKING PROUD OF YOU, GUMI!!"

"You're .... what?"

"SO PROUD! OH MY GOD, TO THINK THE DAY HAS COME-"

At Megumi's look, Gojo sat back down in his seat and cleared his throat. "I mean. Thank you so much for telling me, Gumi. I love you lots, no matter what, okay?"

"O...kay..." Megumi had never expected that to change, but he supposed it was kind of reassuring anyway.

"And - they're not decorated yet because I wasn't sure what colour they should be, but I had a feeling, so I've made you something." Gojo stood up and started hunting in a cupboard, before pulling out a tupperware full of cupcakes. "So, they should be...?"

"Pink, yellow, blue," Megumi sighed. "If you have to."

"I do," Gojo agreed. "Very much so."

"Well, if that's it.." Megumi stood up and made to exit the kitchen.

"Wait!"

Megumi turned.

Gojo grinned, and put his tupperware down. "You didn't think you were escaping without a hug, did you?"

Megumi immediately began scrambling for the door, as Gojo advanced at a sedate pace. "You'll fall over if you're not careful," he commented, watching Megumi's socks slip and slide on the tiled floor. "C'mere."

Megumi's protests were muffled by Gojo's hoodie, as Gojo wrapped him up in his arms like a Christmas present. It took a moment before Megumi reluctantly hugged back; they swayed on the spot for a minute in silence.

It was broken by Gojo's giggle, as Megumi relaxed so far into him that Gojo was practically holding him up.

"Comfy there?"

"Shut up."

A03 | Exclusives | Tip Me | Commissions

#astro speaks wonders #jjk #jujutsu kaisen #jjk megumi #jjk gojo #gojo satoru #satoru gojo #fushiguro megumi #megumi fushiguro #jjk fics #the megumi and gojo incident

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joethetoonfanandoutcast · 10 months

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Thoughts on Scamp's Adventure

I wanted to do a script of characters watch and react to this film, but I couldn't decide which characters to use and roast this film properly, so I'll just criticize it right here.

This film might have been fun when I was a kid but as I got older and rewatched it, it became one of the direct-to-video Disney sequels I disliked.

The animation: one of the only redeeming qualities.

The songs:

* "Welcome Home" - just a standard "good morning to the whole town" song that doesn't seem to match a Lady and the Tramp setting and all to show their life in their hometown is great, that they wouldn't change it for anything and that they're getting ready for the 4th of July picnics. Not really inspiring there.

* "A World Without Fences" - I like the 'wanting to be free' theme, but it'd be better from a different character and a different perspective, and not Scamp, as...well, you'll see why, if you haven't already.

* "Junkyard Society Rag" - hardly catchy at all, and though I like Jess Harnell, he's not the best singing voice for a Chazz Palmenterri character, and it was hard to take any of the dogs serious in this number.

* "I Didn't Know That I Could Feel This Way" - I actually thought this song was touching but should have been done with different characters in a different franchise, as I'm not really into Scamp/Angel like I thought I was as a kid. Though, it's also great to hear Herc's singing voice (Roger Bart) and Meg's voice (Susan Egan) having a duet.

* "Always There" - standard sad times montage song just put in there to add length to the film under the "film must be 90 minutes or at least longer than 60" rule

And I liked the pop title ballad version of "Bella Notte" (the song from the original) though it had nothing to do with this film's plot and this film isn't really worth sitting through just to get to that as we see the names of the people involved in this film roll.

The characters:

* Scamp - he's supposed to be a role model to rebellious kids everywhere and we're supposed to find him cute, but honestly, he's rather a spoiled, annoying, cocky, deluded jerkass who's disrespectful to his own father. He may have learned a lesson at the end, but that doesn't save him from winning a "Butthole Protagonist" award, and he doesn't seem to be deserving of a girlfriend either for his actions. Also, it's weird having a grown man, Scott Wolf, voice a pup when he didn't sound young at all.

* Angel - she's supposed to be this perfect girl designed to be the main character's love interest, and while I don't hate her, I find few faults with her. For example, she looks like she could be Scamp's sister and she does end up being his sister in the end (not biologically, but through adoption from the Dears, yet people still want them to be a thing), and she has this bad girl attitude which is supposed to be charming, but it doesn't come off as charming when they're both pint-sized pups. Maybe it'd come off as charming if they were anthros, but not their canon forms.

* Tramp - sadly been struck with the "Simba Sequel Syndrome"

* Lady - The writers sadly did her dirty. She was the main character of the first one and now she's demoted to the wife/mother of main character who gets less lines in favor of the spouse and offspring, just like Nala. And what's worse, is there are no interactions between her and Scamp, to view if THEY would have any connection whatsoever. It's just Scamp and connection with his dad and his selfish dreams of running off to be a wild dog.

Her role is pretty much summed up in this scene:

"Tramp: Like it or not, you are a part of this family, and until you start acting like it, you can just get used to being out here every night!

Tramp left and went inside in anger, while Lady watched Scamp jump on the roof of the dog house. She gave a hopeless sigh, and went inside as well, leaving Scamp alone to calm down."

Honestly, it shouldn't even be called "Lady and the Tramp II", just have it called "Scamp's Adventure" or "Scamp" and regard it as a spin-off since it's his film.

* Annette, Danielle and Collette - it's kind of dumb having them just being carbon copies of each other with no individual personality or characteristics other than "we like baths" or "we're the perfect children and Scamp's a selfish brat" without even remote compassion for him. And two of them are voiced by Kath Soucie. Nothing against her, but it seemed repetitive to have Kath voice all female children in late 90's-early 2000's Disney cartoons, and I don't like her voicing unlikable girls in cartoons with that kind of voice (such as Jenna from Clifford the Big Red Dog, one of the stepsisters from Happily N'Ever After, and others).

* The Junkyard Dogs - they just come off as pale knock-offs of Dodger and the Downtown Dogs from Oliver & Company. They've got a street-smart leader (Buster to Dodger), a tall, sly, attractive female added in there for furbait though contributes little to the plot and hardly anyone talks to (Ruby to Rita), a diminutive dog with an accent (Francois to Tito), a big doofus (Mooch to Einstein), and the remaining member (Sparky to Francis). And like Fagin called his dogs "boys", ignoring Rita's gender, Buster called them all boys, as if no one cared about Ruby's gender

Disney could have tried to make them more likable and unique but this had to be all about Scamp, and we've already got Jock, Trusty, the Dears and Scamp's family having to return as supporting characters.

Of course, out of all of them, Buster is by far the one that is truly loathsome. He's like a mixture of Dodger, Roscoe and/or Desoto with the smug "I'm better than you" attitude and the jock the new kid at high school foolishly looks up to and wants to be like, even if it means getting himself killed in an initiation. And another sickening quality about him is that he constantly flirts with the lead female, Angel, calling her his girl. I just can't stand those characters who are the alpha male who thinks they're entitled to the most intelligent female among the group.

The dog cronies themselves aren't really terrible, and they have subtle sympathy towards Scamp and Angel, but they're still not charming enough. They even laughed like cronies. They seem like nice dogs, but the writers could have done better with them. And remember how I mentioned that Buster referred to them all as "boys", ignoring Ruby and Angel being girls like Fagin ignored Rita's gender? Well, someone at the studio, SOMEONE could have the decency to correct that mistake and have them correct Buster.

Speaking of Ruby, she didn't have much lines at all, as she suffers the same problem with all cartoon Salukis and Afghan Hounds: sentenced to strictly being background furbait with appealing design yet no focus or qualities to make them more likable, and one thing that bothers me is that she and Angel seem to share no positive feels toward each other or negative towards each other, because back in the 2000's, there didn't seem to be a lot of positive female relationships written in cartoons. I really want someone to write a story with them being friends.

As a kid, I oddly enough hardly noticed her myself and didn't even know she was a girl, and it doesn't help that Buster said "boys". Seriously, why do animators and writers not pay enough attention to background characters?

* The Dogcatcher - weak antagonist with an annoying Don Knotts impression given by Jeff Bennett (who did better with the impression as Jonathan the Seagull on Puppy Dog Pals). I didn't even like this character as a kid.

* Otis - a psychotic annoying Rob Paulsen-voiced character no one ever asked for and was not necessary but someone at the Disney animation studio decided to throw in just to keep Rob employed (what, Rob wasn't already voicing plenty of other characters at the time?).

The story itself: boring, lazy, tiresome, predictable, and doesn't really do the first Lady and the Tramp any justice. That's why I decided that doing a word-for-word fanmake of it isn't worth spending time over. JusSonic would be willing to do something like it, but I'm not. I gave him a transcript and summed up the sequel to his version for 2009, so that's enough.

However, it is not the worst Disney sequel ever made. It's fine to watch at least once (and maybe only once). In honesty, I prefer watching the original or the live-action remake of the original over this. And honestly, I feel this should have been remade, not for the sake of nostalgia, but to make it better.

#review #thoughts on #lady and the tramp ii scamp's adventure #what I think of the film I watched as a kid now

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tim-hoe-wan · 1 year

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In your honest opinion, why do so many people dislike Meghan Markle? I'm not even talking about the disgusting far right and the monarchist, just in general a lot of people find her unlikeable. Even my friends who I think are pretty level headed don't hate her but did say they don't exactly like her.

There's not one single all encompassing answer to this question. She doesn't deserve the level of hatred and vitriol she receives, but she's completely harmless. Even if you do have valid reasons to dislike her, it isn't worth it to dwell on it. I also can't believe she gets the vitriol and Harry barely gets any considering how genuinely stupid and entitled he is. That said from what I can observe here are some reasons:

Misogyny and racism. Internalized misogyny is real. But what's even worst is misogynoir. God forbid a black woman ever tries to step up or defend herself, cause people will be unforgiving, just take a look at Meg. Even if you have valid reasons to dislike her, you can't deny she is a victim of relentless bullying and misogynoir.

She's an enemy of the royal family but not the monarch itself. This is genuinely one of my gripes about them. They are obviously monarchist and have no issues with the royals who treated them nicely. Like ok, so you are willing to criticize the monarch now but let's save Lizzie cause she's nice to you? You still want your kids to have titles?

Lying or plain ignorance? From the Oprah interview onwards, there's just a lot of things easily debunked that you don't know anymore if these two are liars. Why their children won't get the titles, Charles supporting them, the Mandela comment etc. I mean, surely at least Harry knows these things could easily be explained or debunked, but it really doesn't help to give them sympathy.

The Cut Interview. This was actually the one that made me annoyed with them cause she chose the journalist, there was nothing wrong with the interview, yet Meghan threw the journalist under the bus for some reason. Same goes with the netflic doc. Even before it was released, they threw the creators they handpicked under the bus. These two seem to want all praise and everything about them glowing cause The Cut interview was handpicked and was a very good piece.

Those two are truly lacking in self-awareness and have a high opinion of themselves. In this era you'd find it very hard to sympathize with rich people. Especially when these two complain about things that make them sound plain entitled. Just get a regular job Harry. My dad also mentioned recently that Harry's gripes kinda remind him of Andrew trying to assert him and his children as part of the royal budget.

Speaking of which, those two or maybe just Harry, are close to Andrew. By default of course a lot of people would find that an issue. They're willing to talk against Willy, but nothing on Lizzie and Andrew? Come on Harry if William was the one who made a racist comment just say it. You'd look less ridiculous.

Tax payers money. My grandparents favorite gripe. Again you just don't know if they're lying or ignorant. Of course the people don't want to pay for your security if you're no longer "working" royals. Not even giving your children titles will save you as exhibited by Lizzie's less favored children and grandchildren.

She really is an ugly American. You know how everyone hated Emily's attitude in Emily in Paris? Like how Americans act like they're better? Like how Americans can find other culture and other people's rules as ridiculous? Yeah Meghan is like that. Even if I don't mind her disrespecting royal protocol, I mean sometimes her response come off as she has some messiah complex meant to change to system and it does seem she really believes that. But again, we don't want to change the system. We want to abolish it altogether.

My friends really love mocking how she still signs herself as the Duchess of Sussex. From my British friends, it's ironic and hypocritical and just shows in the end they're not your allies. From my American friends, it's ridiculous cause Hamilton is right there to remind you George Washington kicked them out so we don't have to care about these titles anymore.

It's a play of narrative. A lot of their words and actions seem to be they're the protagonist and Willy and Kate, not Lizzie or Charles, are the antagonist. I have no doubt the royal family is an antagonist. I just don't think Meghan and Harry are worthy protagonist at all. Sometimes I'm just waiting for Harry to say he should be heir instead.

Those are what I can think off. In the end I think it's valid to dislike or get annoyed with any person or celebrity. But I do not think Meghan has done anything to receive the level of vitriol and hatred that she is receiving in the daily. They're so easy to ignore and overall way too harmless that if you spend time getting so riled up at Meghan (not Harry, I won't defend his ass), I personally think that's a you problem.

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linawritesocs · 2 years

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💜 twst oc: merrill gardner 💜

YAY, A THIRD OC. and finally, the oc trinity is complete. i find it funny that he's the oldest one of my ocs, but he's the last one i made, so he's technically the youngest. he's babey.

so, i wanted to make an oc based on megara or "meg" from hercules, like, i know that this idea isn't that original, BUT I WANTED TO MAKE A CHARACTER BASED ON HER, OKAY DHDSKDLFG

so here's some information about him! i will most likely add more in the future.

name: merrill gardner (メリル・ガードナー) (so i had trouble with thinking of a name for him, like i tried greek names, i tried english ones and originally i wanted his name to have some kind of a "deep meaning" but then i went "you know what, what if i just pick a first name and a surname that begin with the same letters that the name "megara" has". AND I ACTUALLY KINDA LIKE HOW IT SOUNDS??)

age: 18 y/o

gender: male

species: human

birth date: september 20

zodiac sign: virgo

height: 180 cm

hair color: dark brown (a color name finder website told me it's actually velvet maroon, but.. i don't really think so) with warm purple streaks

eye color: light violet

homeland: he prefers not to talk about his homeland, so no one really knows where he's from.

family: father and mother. he doesn't have any siblings.

school: night raven college (his parents gave him a choice and asked if he wants to go to nrc or rsa. he didn't like both schools, but he thought that in rsa everyone would have expectations for him that are way too high, so he chose nrc)

dorm: ignihyde

school year: third

occupation: student

club: none (and if vance isn't in a club yet, but he's planning to join, merrill just simply.. doesn't want to join any clubs. when asked why, he simply says "too much work and spending time with people i don't really care about")

best subject: astrology

dominant hand: right

favorite food: cherry juice this is a drink but who cares

least favorite food: white chocolate

hobby: photography, stargazing

talent: lip reading this is totally not a reference to that moment when meg says to hades "READ MY LIPS-"

unique magic: "say "i'm in love"" (taruchi mentioned the song when we were talking about him and i was like: wait you can make a unique magic name out of this) merrill can easily learn any person's crush or a "favorite type of person" or "things that they're into" and that person doesn't even have to say anything, merrill just has to look at them. sounds cool and useful, right? merrill actually hates his unique magic because the thing is.. after learning about that person's crush/type/etc, he has to immediately reveal what he learned to somebody else. (and the person that he got information about, doesn't count) and i mean "IMMEDIATELY". if ten seconds passed and merrill still haven't told anyone about who or what that person is into, he loses the ability to move and has to stand (or sit, or lie, whatever he was doing at that moment) like that for an hour. so yeah, this often leads to some very awkward situations, like merrill suddenly running to someone, only to say "by the way, (a student's name) has a crush on (the other student's name)" and then walk away, looking relieved. he also hates his unique magic because.. let's just say, he knows too much and he doesn't want to live with that knowledge. sometimes knowing all about nrc students' crushes can be exhausting and uncomfortable.

dislikes: irresponsible people

personality: merrill is a kind of person who wakes up and he's already tired of everything. he always seems done with everything and everyone, even though he doesn't look particularly annoyed or mad. it's just something about his tone and the way he speaks. some students wonder, does he ever speak without sarcasm? and though merrill talks a lot and he's not really an introverted person, he still doesn't have any friends. some people think he's too intimidating, some people find it hard to understand him and some people are just too shy to talk to him. merrill can also be quite manipulative and he can easily get people to do anything for him. one of his main manipulation tactics is simply flirting. and it (well, almost) always works, even if nrc is an all-boys school and the boy he's talking to is straight. when he doesn't get what he want, merrill goes "oh well, i'll just ask someone else" and walks away. he also can be often seen with a phone in his hand, but he never lets anyone see what's on his phone screen. some people suspect that merrill may actually not be so "cool and mature" as he seems to be. merrill doesn't let anyone see his room and also you can see him with his phone all the time and he mentioned having a magicam account, but no one still managed to find his account. some students think that he either has stuffed animals in his room or something like that and his magicam account is very cute or.. it's actually way scarier. so he's this mysterious person with many secrets and no one knows what is going on inside his head! and he has the ability to make anyone's heart beat faster, but it doesn't seem like he has feelings for anyone.. people wonder how merrill would act when he finally gets a crush on someone.

notable relationships:

as you've probably already guessed, merrill doesn't really like idia. at first, he didn't like him just because idia's personality annoyed him, but then.. something happened. and that "something" means "idia is the only person in nrc who managed to find merrill's social media and he knows the boy's main secret". idia didn't want to tell anyone about it and he planned to keep it secret, but when he saw how much it worried merrill, he was like: ".. wait, what if i ask him for something in exchange for not telling anyone". oh, and what did he ask him? ah, after that idia and merrill's relationship became similar to one of leona and ruggie's. merrill "takes care" of idia, making sure he eats and sleeps properly and doesn't just game all day. but the thing is that merrill reminds idia how much he hates doing this every single time. and also when idia asked him that, he thought "oh, he will bring me snacks when i'm too lazy to get them and stuff like that", but merrill is.. absolutely ruthless. for example, if it's late, merrill will FORCE idia to go to sleep, but at the same time he would be saying things like "oh, do you want me to sing you a lullaby?~" and then idia would be like "n-no" and get in response "WELL THEN GO TO SLEEP YOU HAVE CLASSES TOMORROW AND YOU BETTER BE THERE"

if merrill doesn't like idia that much, he REALLY likes ortho and thinks he's adorable. he often tries to "steal" ortho from idia when the older shroud is not looking. merrill just thinks ortho is very cute and he wishes he had a younger brother like that. he also supports ortho's attempts to get idia to go outside more.

cater is trying really hard to find merrill's account and merrill finds his attempts funny, even kind of cute. why cater finding his acc doesn't worry him that much? he thinks that cater will never be able to find merrill's account because he won't recognize merrill being the one in the photos.

fun facts:

his unique magic is basically a reversed version of "i won't say 'i'm in love"". merrill can learn any person's crush/type/things they're into/etc, but he has to let at least one person know that. if he doesn't, he can't move for an hour, becoming similar to a statue. this is a reference to muses, who heard meg singing about her feelings and they were "coming alive" and moving during the song, but what happens to merrill is the opposite of that.

vil wanted merrill to be sorted into pomefiore, he thought that such an attractive guy could be a perfect pomefiore student. but this didn't happen and merrill was sorted into ignihyde. vil, however, still tries to get along with merrill and he once said to him that everyone in pomefiore would love to get to know him better.

merrill once pranked idia, giving him a maid outfit and cat ears as a gift. however, idia noticed that the maid dress was very detailed and said "wow, you really know your stuff, don't you", hinting at merrill knowing a lot about maid outfits and buying them for not the first time. idia almost went to the underworld that day.

merrill actually can see very well without his glasses and wears them because he has a much softer and cuter appearance without them.. but that's not the only reason why.

his voice lines:

if you choose to hold his hand: "wow, you're really straightforward with your feelings, aren't you? it's not like i dislike it though."

level up:

"leveling up is crucial!.. that's what idia would say."

"is this what you gamers call "level up"?"

"huh, it seems that i've become stronger now."

level up max:

"thank you for helping me. i might even show you my secret magicam account as a reward~"

episode level up:

"hey, thank you for hanging out with me today. i.. i had a lot of fun. now, do you want to take a photo together? i won't post it anywhere, but i'll treasure it."

limit break:

"wow, you've saved so many photos of me!.. aren't you a bit too obsessed with me, dear?"

groovy:

"what do you think of this new outfit of mine? can you please take a photo of me for my account? w-wait, i haven't come up with a pose yet!"

lesson lines (before lesson):

"i'm fine with going to any class, really. well, as long as i don't share classes with idia."

"okay, okay, i get it, no using phone during classes. but hey, look at that guy from heartslabyul, have you ever seen him without his phone?"

"okay, i've finished braiding my hair. let's go then!"

lesson start:

"follow me, you don't want us to be late, do you?"

lesson end:

"thank you for making this class less boring."

battle start:

"do you want to record a video of me beating those guys?"

battle win:

"oh well, it's over. that was easy. ugh, i shouldn't have been wearing glasses during this fight.."

#lina draws ocs #twisted wonderland oc #twst oc #no i don't have a tag for him yet

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beclynn-herondale · 3 years

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If you let me chapter 2

(For some reason, I am kinda getting nervous about this story, idk, but anyway I wrote the second Chapter last night as well, but idk if I'll be this productive again 😂) also this is another universe kinda thing}

Rosemary woke up to the sun bright in her room, she guessed she cried herself to sleep, she hated crying so she made sure no one was around to see her do it, and she went to check on Kit, who was still sleeping in his basinet, she decided to watch him sleep for a bit, she noticed Johnny still wasn't in the room, maybe he had gotten up or maybe he had never come home.

She supposed once Kit woke up she should eat something but she didn't have much interest in food lately, but she needed to, she thought of Céline making her breakfast and smiled, wow, she really needed to stop thinking like this but she couldn't get Céline out of her head.

Why couldn't she? She couldn't stop thinking of how beautiful Céline was and how her hair looked so soft, how her eyes were a beautiful green and she could stare into them for hours, how her lips looked soft and wondered what kissing her would be like, these thoughts went through her head on a daily basis and she wish she could stop but also maybe she was happy for them.

Kit woke up and she smiled at him

"Are you hungry my baby?" She said

And she picked him up and went to the kitchen to fix him a bottle, she made herself some toast with strawberry jam.

______

Céline took Jace to get Crepes today for breakfast, Céline loved chocolate crepes and it seemed her son had inherited the love for them as we, she was also teaching him french, he loved when she sang to him in french.

"Oh buddy, you got some chocolate on your cheek," she said.

"You too, mama," he informed her.

And they both laughed, she loved these moments where things felt normal and she could forget for even a moment, she had never known she could be this happy, until she had Jace and suddenly it was like there was a new light in her life, she would love him and be so gentle with him, he would never know anything like the childhood she had.

She picked up a napkin and wiped the chocolate off his cheek, he smiled at her.

"Alright what do you wanna do now?" She asked him

"Can you help me with reading?" He asked

Jace was always wanting to read and learn how, he loved learning

"Alright," she told him.

______

Rosemary noticed Johnny was still not home, she wondered if he decided to leave them, surely not though, right? She always had this fear in her that he would and she wondered if she would actually care if he did, she hated herself for feeling this way and thinking these things but life is like that.

She looked over at Kit playing with his stuffed animal and smiled, he didn't know hardships yet and she wished he would never have to, but she knew that it wasn't in her power to decide that.

The door opened and Johnny walked in, he looked annoyed

"Where have you been?" She asked calmly.

"At the shadow market, why does it matter?" He said

"I think I have a right to know where you are, especially when you haven't been home for almost a day," she said with a bit more force this time.

"Well I wasn't sure if that Céline was gonna be around, I don't like her and honestly I would like you to stop meeting with her, and that brat of hers," he said.

And Rosemary felt a rage she hadn't felt in a long time.

"Jace isn't a brat and Céline is my friend, and you don't get to decide if I hang out with people or not, I don't say you can't be at the market all the time," she said with a calm rage to her voice.

"Well it's my house and I haven't said anything to Céline's face, I tolerate her when she's here, hell I even became ok with the fact we were having a kid, and I continue to go out and make money to pay for everything!" He shouted at her.

And she felt her heart sink and break a little in her chest, she never thought he would actually say he didn't want Kit but he just did, she started cry and wanted to stop but couldn't, she loved him and they had a kid together so why did it feel like it was falling apart? She loved him.

"Rosemary. . . I... I am sorry, I shouldn't have yelled that or said any of it, I am just upset," he said more softly.

"Are you sorry? Or are you just saying that so I'll pretend everything is alright when it's not," Rosemary said, she realized she had said what she had been feeling for a while.

"It's that woman, Céline she is filling your head with stuff that isn't true, you know she has this idea that women are strong and can raise a kid on their own," he said with venom

"Women can do things on their own," she said.

"Really, why are you still relying on me than?" He said

"Well maybe I won't anymore," she said

And he looked like she had slapped but she didn't really care cause he had just shattered part of her heart, she would regret later she knew.

She saw Kit looked upset but he wasn't crying and she went over to hold him.

______

"Good job!, Buddy," Céline said cheerfully to her son

"I did it," he said so happy.

"Yes you did."

He had just read three whole pages of a book in french and he was so proud of himself, she would eventually start teaching him latin and if he is interested other languages.

"Hey mom?" He said

She realized she had zoned out

"Yes, baby?"

"Do you think some day I could learn the piano?" He asked

"Of course you can, my sunshine," she said and ruffled his curly hair.

She hoped he wouldn't lose his curls when he got older, he had beautiful curly hair, his eyes were gold, and she thought she knew why but couldn't be sure.

______

Maryse and Robert had been exiled to the New York Institute, several years ago, they were the heads, and Maryse hated that Alec and Isabelle didn't know very many other Shadowhunter kids, but it was her fault, she trusted Valentine and let him play her like a chess piece.

She kept in contact with Céline, Céline kept eyes out for anything that wasn't normal in paris and Maryse did the same in New York, she disliked Céline when she first met her, but she didn't hate her now, she was also raising a kid out of Idris and not around other Shadowhunter kids, she asked Céline if she wanted to come visit cause maybe their kids would hit it off.

Maybe they would have another friend, and it had been years since Maryse had seen Céline so maybe things could change, or maybe Maryse is finding am excuse just to see someone.

______

After their fight Rosemary waited for Johnny to leave before she packed stuff for her and Kit and went off to find a warlock to make a portal, she decided she would go to Céline, maybe Johnny would figure out where she went but she at least needed some time away from him.

Amd Céline would be nice to just be around, she never thought she would become close to this girl who had saved her years and years ago, but life was funny that way wasn't it?

And they are both so different now, both mom's trying to make the best with what they have, trying to not let the world hurt their children like it did them, she knew a little about what Céline's parents had done to her and she wished Céline had never gone through that, but she remembered what happened to her parents and wished she had never had to see them like that.

She found a warlock and they made her a portal, she went through it and she was in Paris, and it brought back memories of that night she first met Céline and that Silent Brother.

She started trying to figure out which part she was in and after she did she made her to Céline's.

She got to her small apartment and knocked on the door, Céline opened it and looked shocked.

"Rosemary. . . Why are you here? Is everything ok?," She asked concerned.

And she just cried and hugged Céline, Kit was in her arms but she didn't want to let go and she didn't want Céline to let go of her.

"Mommy, who is it?" She heard Jace call as he came to the door.

he saw them and joined the hug, telling Rosemary it would be ok, and that she could cry cause crying is good, this angel she thought.

Tagging @khaleesiofalicante cause I put a scene where Céline and Jace eat crepes, @chibi-tsukiko @spotsandclawsthings @megs-readstoomuch meg idk if you are interested in this but I am gonna tag you from now on if that's alright 🙈

#celine montclaire #celine herondale #rosemary herondale #rosemary x céline #roseline #jace herondale #kit herondale #tsc #the shadowhuter chronicles #tmi #the mortal instruments #tst #the secret treasons #bec's fanfics

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mocacheezy · 3 years

Text

I was able to get an old portable dvd player (thank you parents of the past, it is much appreciated in the year of '21, and thank you sister for keeping it somewhere we could find it) and after buying the cable and charging it, I started watching that Transformers dvd I got some time ago.

Turns out its TF Generations, so we're watching "through the cube" which alright, nice to get the nostalgia going for the parents, while also getting the attention of the kids with the constant rotating scene from scene. Kind of annoying for me but hey, that's just my attention problems.

It has two episodes: More Than Meets the Eye, Part 3 and Auto Berserk and here's my thoughts on the dubbing:

I actually missed dubbing from my childhood, and the fact Soundwave, Spike, Red Alert and Mirage have female VAs brings me intense amounts of joy. I didn't even know I will be so happy to hear this old, somewhat crappy dubbing. I missed it and didn't even know it.

The crowd cheers are pathetic just as I remember them XD

"Ti ne bi mogel voditi androidov na piknik." alright, alright, nice change of a joke that doesn't translate, but that means Megatron (and other Cons probably) discriminate against androids.

The "Transform and roll out! " sounds... strange. Then again it is a dub and I didn't watch this as a kid XD

The way slovene is spoken has me smile and cringe because it sounds so formal but it actually isn't. It might also be the way language evolved. It could also be my lack of watching dubs for a long long time.

Za slovenski folk: "Spremenite se, pa pojdimo!". Ta "Pa pojdimo" me ubije. Uporabili so ga samo enkrat, "Spremenite se" pa je prisoten pri skoraj vsakem transformiranju, ampak tisti resni glas s takim stavkom XD

In total I think there are 3 guys and 1 girl dubbing this. I guess this is similar to what we have today, with the difference the old folks DON'T try to change their pitch... I think. Multiple characters have the same VA amd you can clearly tell it's the same one. (I also think there might be two girls in the new dub group, but I'm not sure).

I wonder why, aside from musicians and comedians, we don't have more voice actors??? Or trained voice actors?

I have no place to really talk, because giving voice to characters is an art, and not everyone can be Frank Welker. So unless I myself go into the dub buisness, I am keeping my mouth shut and congratulating the dubbers.

10 for the effort and execution

(even if the older gen knew how to make falling on the ground sound more realistic. Yes I am still not over Cyberverse Windblade being yeeted across the desert and her screaming and grunting so softlya when she bounces off the floor. But as I said, being a VA is tough work and my nostalgia might also be affecting my viewing of the newer stuff)

So to wrap up the dub experience:

and down here are some of my thought process while watching the two episodes:

who was going to tell me that G1 Prime has a blue underside of his crotch plate? How come I never saw that anywhere?? This has so much potential and jokes about interface difficulties, if I don't find at least one joke in a crackfic about it I will be disapointed.

I love Optimus' head shape and finials, he looks adorable.

I'll watch G1 eventually, but if Spike really does write in his diary about how Optimus would make a good president I am high fiving the lil bastard.

You know you are in too deep when you see a 2D warlord and can't stop smiling. Bitch, I don't even fully know you but BY FUCK do I love the design and mannerisms!!! OG Megatron, 10/10, and I may be biased because childhood dubbing, but they picked a good VA for him.

Great VA choice for Starscream too! And he is very pretty as well, damn, I can see why people love G1 even without nostalgia!

Ravage, what can I say. Good casette. (Also love how he doesn't speak to the Autobots, but comms Megatron)

SPEAKING OF TALKING: Skywarp requesting permission to teleport and his interaction with Megs made me smile so much LOOK AT HIM, LOOK AT OUR TELEPORTING BOY!!! He shoots for shit, is awful at it, but look at him go!

Unicron singularity might be the answer to why Ironhide and Bluestreak can fly, but I'm not sure.

In any case I love how Optimus speaks to Ironhide, it's great. Heck, the Autobots dynamic and interactions are great. I can see why people say Optimus is a dad, or why they talk about how the Autobots are like a family.

Also we see slow motion of how OP transforms and I adore it!

And how he acts too! He is stubborn and it takes multiple attempts to persuade him from sacrificing himself/trying to do his duty as a leader when it's too dangerous. He listens to his friends and soldiers, but isn't hapoy about it. He acknowledges the risk.

Back to blue underside crotch however: IT'S JUST A BLUE LIL SQUARE UNDER ALL THAT WHITE! WHAT PURPOSE DOES IT SERVE ASIDE FROM BEING PRIME'S LIL GARAGE??? COME ON! COME ON!! A blue trussy, I mean tfp had a bikini situation going on, but G1 Prime has just a tiny rectangle/square! I don't even know the shape but it's BLUE ON WHITE CAN IT STAND OUT EVEN MORE??? (And here I thought the Megatron toy and the trigger crotch were bad XD)

Seeing Starscream manipulate Red Alert had me smiling. Look at this tri colori squeak toy jet. Being his eviiil self.

Seeing how Megatron interacts with his other Cons is just hilarious. He is a TERRIBLE boss if you make a misstep. So mean! ...Then again, he is bent on destroying the autobots if he can't get to Cybertron first, so *shrugs* the guy can be a lil frustrated I suppose. He does pick on Screamer alot however, and the dynamic of these two has me understand MegaStar much better.

They are a bickering old couple that joke about how they'll kill eachother, but never go fully through with it. Must be true love~

All in all, glad I got that dvd. Megatron has screen time in it, the animation is ridiculously pretty in that old show way and even if the episodes were probably selected at random for the dvd it was interesting to watch.

I love it. Can't wait to watch G1 when my brain allows it, and I will forever wonder if actual G1 was also dubbed fully.

#moca watches #transformers dub #moca screeches #slovene dubbing

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rewatching-supernatural · 3 years

Text

s01e16

first of the day, let's go!

*****

man the fashion back in 2005/6 uh

Meredith...

the shadows are following her, this is so cool

ah yes, the days when people had 100 key on their keychains

oh good, girl has a security system, yes! we love that for you

only issue is, shadows don't trigger alarm systems

*****

this reminds me of the shadow theater I did back in high school, that was such a cool project

*****

Stealth Killer uh?

I love all their costumes, even if Dean hates them 😅

*****

this reminds me of the locked room case in brooklyn nine nine, the killer's still in the vent guys!

but her heart was missing, mhm, of course

*****

Dean flirting with every woman always, because he just can't stop himself

"Your upstairs brain" god Sam thanks

Research Sam™ is my fave, tbh, closely followed by Annoying Sibling San™

*****

ah no, not Sam and Meg again dammit

I mean, I'm all for demon!Meg and following her adventures as a murderer, but Sam and Meg interacting is really weird and uncomfortable

at least Sam notices it's fucking weird too

Yay Sam for trusting his instincts

*****

Great shot of Dean going research

Zoroastrian, old school, Daeva

of course Dean called people haha

Dean telling Sam how to bite a girl, for fuck's sake 😂

Hahahahaha Sam got caught, yes random woman! Pervert indeed!

*****

This is so stupid, why would Sam follow her so closely, it's impossible to think she wouldn't hear the door open and close ten seconds after she went through

Why would Sam go alone in that unknown place, seriously

what an idiot

with upper body strength, sure, but still na idiot

what a weird shot of Sam in the elevator shaft

what does he think he's going to do now? he's stuck there

why wouldn't he call and tell Dean where he is??

I swear these two idiots get caught so many times because they're not women

as women we're taught from a young age to always have someone know where you are, to never walk alone in alleyways, to always be ready to call the cops/for help, etc

if they even did 1/10 of the shit I do as precautions whenever I'm alone / out at night / in a big city, they wouldn't get hurt

*****

Big discussion about Sam wanting a different life "when this is all over"

damn poor baby doesn't know what's coming

*****

oh of course, Sam reclimbed the entire shaft again withiut making a noise, for sure

they're less than ten meters away, what the hell, of course she's gonna know they're there

aww it scratched Sam's cheek, that must hurt

*****

it's a trap for daddy Winchester

*****

"Go to hell!"

"Baby, I'm already there."

Meg you bitch I love you

if only she could exist in another way than by "my entire life revolves around these men"

*****

Goodbye Meg! have a safe flight!

*****

This hallway is so familiar, I'm sure they reuse it constantly and that's why my brain knows it so well

*****

Daddy Win is there

aw sweet reunion with Dean, and then awkward look at Sam

this is such a weird scene, I thoroughly hate John so much I just can't stand any scene he's in

that actor is super talented too I wish I could enjoy his acting but I'm just like ughh get him away from my boys

just the fact that they call him Sir makes me want to throw up

*****

acting like you're being pushed and hit and shit when there's nothing is very impressive

*****

"These things are shadows demons so let's light em up!" yes Sam, thank you for explaining it to us like we're four

*****

Dean being all logical when Sam is emotional, and Sam being all Research Sam™ when Dean wants to just run head first into things

what a good team tbh, find yourself someone who can balance your crazy shit with their crazy shit like that

*****

and we're done!

#supernatural rewatch #supernatural #spn #spn rewatch #spn s01e16 #s01e16 #meg #facing meg #zoroastrian #zoroastrianism #john winchester #daddy winchester #feb 14

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monsters-demons-and-ai-oh-my · 5 years

Text

What We Lost and What We Have

Chapter 4: Crony capitalism, big needles, and pep talks from hell

TW: Big Needles are mentioned Castiel and Dean take an awkward car ride to deal with an annoying little man. Meg attempts a pep talk and Sam is in over his head

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AU somewhat inspired by Episode 2x20 - What Is and What Should Never Be, and the season 14 storyline concerning Jack’s illness.

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AO3 Link

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First Chapter

Complete Tumblr Chapter List

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It was nearly another hour before the doctors were done with Jack and Castiel was ready to leave. He'd stayed with the teenager as the doctors finished up their scans (and whatever else they had to do involving his lungs and cameras), and then he'd practically held Jack's hand all the way back to his hospital room.

Dean didn't know much about the teen but he figured if one of his parents did that when he was Jack’s age he would have been mortified.

Then again Jack still seemed far too high on pain meds to really give a shit about what was going on around him.

It wasn't as if Dean was going to say anything either way.

He didn't seem to be able to say much of anything lately without running his mouth off and starting World War bitchface.

The Klines always seemed to bring out the worst in Dean. Any time he saw Castiel the man always treated him the same; from the first time he'd taken the flight with his dad up to Washington state to meet with him when Jack was a newborn. Castiel always seemed to look at the Winchesters like they were his enemies like he expected John and Dean to stab him in the back if he dared to turn away from them.

Dean was sure it would be that suspicious stuck up face he’d see if he dared to turn to look in Impala’s passenger seat.

Castiel had been nearly silent following Dean out to the parking lot, only thanking him stiffly and asking him if he needed directions to the hotel across town.

“I live here,” he said harsher than necessary, immediately regretting it and following up with a gruff, “just tell me the name I’ll find it…”

God was that was fucking awkward.

At least Dean had an excuse with Castiel…

Jack was… Jack was some awkward kid who as far as he knew didn't really deserve the hot ball of fire that rose in Dean's chest every time he saw him. He didn't like the person he became inside when he saw the kid and he wished more than anything Jack would just go back with his smug uncle a few hundred miles away.

Why Castiel with all his suspicion and mollycoddling thought it was a good idea to bring Jack back to Kansas… He didn't know.

But Dean had told Sam he’d be there while Jack was sick… and he didn’t want to let Sam down again.

No matter how hard he tried he couldn't see himself as a part of Sam's little remorseful crusade to make what happened right but his brother Sam mattered. So he’d try to grin and bear it, deal with whatever this was until it was over… and things went back to normal.

The car was uncomfortably quiet the radio off as Castiel was making phone calls to what sounded like a school.

"No no, please don't let Mr. Sully substitute for my class, he’s too lenient with the students they'll never finish their review packets on time for the exam…"

Dean squeezed the wheel and tried to remind himself to just focus on the road and mind his own damn business.

"Th-the exam?" he heard after a moment, "I… I um…"

He heard Castiel take a shaky breath.

"I… we should be back in time to proctor it, if… if everything goes well…" there was a long silence. "No… they still don't… they don't know…"

Dean felt like running the car into a ditch to escape.

"I… I'll let him know you hope he feels better… goodbye…" Dean heard the man’s voice choke slightly before he hung up.

He could hear Castiel breathing shakily, see him blink rapidly to clear his eyes in the mirror. It almost shook something in Dean too.

But like Castiel, he shoved the feeling back and clicked on the radio instead.

Led Zeppelin's " The Rain Song," started it's mournful tones and Dean quickly switched it off again.

The car was too quiet yet again.

Dean cleared his throat awkwardly, the silence was somehow worse than listening to a grown man near tears.

"So, you're a teacher?" he asked vaguely just for something to fill the void.

Out of the corner of his eye he saw Castiel blink dubiously at him

"High School science…" he muttered shuffling in his seat slightly uncomfortable, "Advanced Placement Biology… and Physics."

Dean gave a non-committal noise of acknowledgment.

He thought for a moment back to when he first met the man.

Don't ask, don't ask…

"I thought you were going to school to be a doctor or something?"

There was a pause he could feel the man's eyes on him.

"Nurse Practitioner… and that was a long time ago…" Castiel said with an odd tone in his voice, cutting short the line of questioning.

There was no sound for a long moment and Dean tried to focus back on the road.

"The turn is up on the right…" Castiel said after a moment glancing at the time on his phone with an anxious brooding expression.

"Dude you have half an hour until two, chill," Dean muttered under his breath half hoping he wouldn't be heard.

"It not your property or your reputation on the line Dean," Castiel said stiffly, the stick in his ass somehow jamming up higher.

Dean took a deep breath and shoved down his need to aggressively defend the honor and reputation of mechanics everywhere.

Sick kid, sick kid, dude has a sick kid…

"I am driving though you know…"

Castiel finally relaxed slightly, slumping back into the anxious guilty posture he'd had at the hospital. It made Dean feel almost worse.

"I'm sorry… thank you…" Castiel said quietly, "let's… let's just get this over with…"

The hotel came up quickly on the right side of the road Dean raised an eyebrow, the way the dude on the phone talked and Castiel acted you would have thought he was late checking out of the Ritz Carlton.

This place had the "O" and "T" literally burned out of the lit "Hotel" sign and the pool looked like a suspiciously green public health hazard.

Maybe that's where Jack picked up whatever plague he had.

"It's… changed ownership since the last time I stayed here," Castiel tried to explain looking sheepish.

Dean just blinked at him incredulously and pulled up to the office, "Yeah… sign says under renovation… probably looks great inside."

He couldn’t not rub the obvious in a little, not with the way Castiel acted, he'd explode.

The man rolled his eyes, "Just… wait out here, this should only take a minute to sort out."

He slammed the passenger door a little harder than necessary getting out of the car.

Dean flicked back on the radio, now more appropriately playing Harry Nilsson's - "You're breaking my heart."

He turned it up and gave and gave Castiel an insincere smile when he turned back to glare at him.

The man just rolled his eyes again and went inside.

Dean waited as "You're breaking my heart" along with three other songs came and went and still Castiel hadn't returned. Dean tapped impatiently on his steering wheel turning the engine off to conserve gas.

Dean tried not to let his curiosity get the better of him, first telling himself to stay in the car, then telling himself he was only going inside to share his annoyance with Castiel taking his dear sweet time.

Real convincing.

He heard arguing as he got closer to the door.

"I'm not going to pay you to get our luggage back, you said nothing about that over the phone!"

When he pushed open the ajar office door he saw Castiel leaning against the desk and arguing with a short man dressed suspiciously well for the shitty barely air-conditioned office he was in.

Some scruffy little dirtbag sitting in a nice chair, in a fancy suit, surrounded by four walls covered in peeling dark maroon wallpaper that probably been there since the place opened.

"Well I'm sorry, but it's policy, it was in the room contract that you signed."

British accent too, wasn't he special.

"I already paid for the extra day…" Castiel sounded harassed.

Dean's eyebrows rose almost to his hairline something about the situation felt wrong and he nearly backed right back out the door.

Don’t get involved.

"It's a new policy introduced to encourage our guests to check out on time, I’m sorry if you feel that way, but it's in the fine print," the man shrugged smugly.

Searching his mind Dean couldn't come up with a more punchable face, it felt familiar though like he’d seen it before.

Castiel blinked at the man looking mildly disgusted before sighing and pulling out his wallet exasperated, "I really don't have the time for this how much do you need…"

The man in the suit shrugged, "I'll give you the discount, a flat fifty dollars."

Dean reacted to that without really meaning to, whistling at the fee, both men finally seemed to notice him at the door.

Castiel looked away quickly somehow even more embarrassed than before.

Part of Dean wanted to be happy about it, to be just as petty as his brain told him he deserved to be. To see the man who seemed to permanently assume he and his family were the scum of the earth (despite the fact that they shared half their blood with his sister's kid) embarrassed.

But… he couldn't.

Because this was a fucking joke. Separating himself from his feelings about Castiel this was some asshole separating a man from his money simply because he was desperate enough to actually pay it.

Dean found himself speaking, “It’s just… fifty bucks is a little steep, don't you think? Considering your room rate is only forty-five a night?”

Where most people saw a parent scared senseless and in a tight spot this asshole just saw dollar signs.

"You know I was just thinking…" Dean leaned nonchalantly again the frame of the office door, "it only really makes sense to try to get your customers to obey the rules by threatening to hold their junk hostage if they already knew that rule existed when they checked in."

"Ah," the man smiled at him with mild malice in his eyes, "Well, as I said, it’s in the contract I’ll just have to make it more obvious next time…"

Yeah right...

He reached out for Castiel's money but Dean found himself speaking again.

"I'm guessing Cas here told you he wasn't able to meet the check out time because he's been at the hospital all night, because his kid is sick…"

"Dean," Castiel shot him a warning voice full of mild panic like he was afraid of the very real possibility that Dean would make things worse.

Dean kept his eyes on the bargain basement con man.

The man had the decency to look nervous, "While I have the greatest sympathy for your friend here, I can't afford to look away this time. I only recently acquired this place and we're in the middle of renovations you see."

The man’s face finally clicked in Dean’s mind.

"And what did do before you bought this place, sell used cars?"

The little man looked like he about fit the colorful descriptions of the seller half the lemon owners who came into his auto shop described.

"You're name is Crowley right?"

Dean felt a hand suddenly tighten on his shoulder, Castiel had moved at some point without him seeing.

"Could you please excuse us for a moment?" he said through gritted teeth shooting Dean a frustrated look.

Crowley seemed mildly relieved to look away from Dean, "of course…," he smiled casually, "I have nowhere to be…"

Castiel's mouth twitched and he almost dragged the larger man out of the office.

As soon as they were out of earshot…

"What are you doing!?" Castiel asked looking exasperated.

Dean blinked at him for a long moment before replying, "you can't tell that dude is playing you?"

Castiel's mouth opened and closed before he huffed, "I don't know? But do I look like I care?"

The man looked like he was about to blow a vein, all the nervous energy that Dean thought was building up to get to the hotel was still there. Dean felt like an idiot.

It was never about the stupid fucking suitcases or his reputation...

"Look," Dean said carefully, "I'll get you back to the kid just go get your things, wait at the car… if I'm not back in five minutes I'll pay the stupid fee myself and we'll leave, okay?"

Castiel hesitated looking unsure, tettering, but the need to get the hell out of there won out.

"Five minutes…"

Dean smiled thinly patting his shoulder awkwardly and tossing over the keys, "thanks."

Castiel gave him one last incredulous glance before leaving in search of the luggage.

Dean headed back to the office to deal with the con man.

Crowley smiled nonchalantly as if nothing had happened, "finished the lovers quarrel and here to foot the bill?"

Dean huffed, "You're really sticking to this bullshit aren't you?"

Crowley gave a fake tired sigh, "Again, it is not 'bullshit' it is written into the contract all guests sign when they rent a room, I'm just holding them to it."

Dean puzzled over what to say for a moment his mind turning to Sam…

"Well you know there's a law that protects customers from…" Dean searched for the word Sam threw around whenever Dean called to ask him about anything law-related, "predatory claims like this…"

Crowley's eyebrows rose mirthfully trying to cover slight nervousness, "it's a contract, it's not my fault your friend didn't read the fine print before he signed."

"Really because penal code…" Dean rolled the mental lottery, "67845 C says otherwise."

Crowley looked skeptical.

"Believe me I know, I own an auto shop people try to use it all the time when they get a rate they don't like…" Dean lied through his teeth giving a small shrug.

"Well, I highly doubt anyone who stays in this dump would have the cash lying around for a frivolous lawsuit…" Crowley said unconvinced crossing his arms.

It seemed like the innocent owner act was finally slipping but unfortunately, Dean knew he was probably right.

Mary had worked at the local high school teaching history for a while after she and John separated, Dean knew a teachers salary wasn’t exactly high.

"Look I'm sorry about your friend's situation, I really am…"

Bullshit

"But I apply the same rules to every customer, I can't bend them for one person. My mother once came in wanting a free room saying she was terminally ill,” The man shrugged and leaned back in his chair with a squeak, “I did not give it to her."

Dean’s eyebrows rose.

"Relax she was lying…" Crowley said flatly.

Apple doesn’t fall far from the tree I guess.

“I… I really don’t care,” Dean said back just as monotonously.

He was beginning to worry. It didn’t seem like logic or appealing to Crowley’s “ better nature ” was going to work.

It wasn’t about Castiel, it really wasn’t, he told himself. It was just this man thought he could get away with this ridiculous and bad-natured con just to get a quick buck and he’d probably continue to prey on people who didn’t have the money to stay at a nicer place and fight back.

Dean was going to have to change tactics.

“Do you still own that shitty car lot along with the shitty motel?” Dean asked innocently.

Crowley’s eyebrow rose in fake offense to Dean’s overt implication.

“I do own both establishments yes…”

“Mmm…” Dean tilted his head and smiled mirthlessly, “so how about you forgive Cas’s luggage debt and I don’t post the six-page list of complaints I’ve gotten about your lot up in the waiting area of my auto shop…”

-------

Dean exited the office a minute later to see Castiel pacing the length of the Impala.

“Did it work? If it didn’t I promise I can pay you back I…” the man had started wringing his hands anxiously.

Dean raised a hand to cut him off and smiled like the cat who got the canary.

- Which it turned out was sheepishly, like he had a mouth full of feathers and was questioning his life choices -.

“Don’t worry about it… it’s done,” Dean said vaguely before quickly changing the subject, “you get your stuff?”

Castiel still looked a little puzzled but nodded, “I put the bags in the backseat…”

Dean grunted satisfied before climbing into the car himself, “Let’s get you back to your car so you can get back to your... hovering.”

He said it half talking to himself like it meant nothing.

Let’s get this over with…

Castiel nodded hesitantly before climbing in the passenger side.

Dean turned back on the car, the radio resuming it’s blaring of the classic rock station and they left the crap show of a motel behind.

Castiel said something he couldn’t quite catch.

“What?”

Castiel huffed and reached over to turn down the radio, much to Dean’s chagrin.

“I said… thank you…” the words were dragged like Cas was struggling under the weight of the sentence.

Dean shrugged not looking up from the road, “You don’t have to, I would’ve done it for anyone, dude was shady.”

It was probably true...

Castiel seemed to go back to staring into nothing out the window.

Dean’s thoughts began to nag at him.

“So where are you staying tonight?” managed to slip out, “I mean, obviously you aren’t staying at that dump anymore…”

Castiel was quiet for a long moment, “I’m probably going to stay with Jack at the hospital again, I’ve already been away too long...”

Dean grunted non-commitally, he couldn’t imagine sleeping in one of the hospital’s half cushioned pink monstrosities they called chairs.

“Why are you asking?” Cas quipped back.

Deans shrugged cooly, “I mean it’s just, what are you going to do when you need a shower or something?”

Castiel bit his lip unsure, “I’ll get a new hotel room.”

Dean gave another half-convinced huff.

- As in he only had half of either man convinced he was convinced of anything. -

It took all of ten seconds before Dean blurted...

“I mean probably one of the reasons that jackass was in such a hurry to chase you out of his place was there’s gonna be a premium on shitty hotel rooms around town with Kansas University big spring preview ga-...”

“Dean…” Castiel cut him off sighing rubbing at his face, “I… I appreciate what you did for us back at the motel I really do, but I don’t need you to play host or anything like that.”

Dean’s mouth opened and closed awkwardly and he focused back on driving,

“I was just going to recommend a few places,” Dean lied smoothly.

Castiel seemed to take the excuse, “I’d actually appreciate that…”

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Sam resumed his awkward chair perching in Jack’s hospital room as soon as Castiel and Dean left.

He’d bought a black stuffed bear holding a little yellow “Get well Soon” heart while waiting for Jack to come out of the lab in an attempt to make things a little less awkward.

Did sixteen-year-olds even like that sort of thing? He wasn’t sure but thankfully Jack was passed out again by the time Sam got back upstairs from the gift shop.

He didn’t seem to want to do much more than sleep lately…

Part of Sam hoped to hell that Jack wouldn’t wake up until his uncle got finished with his business at the hotel. But at the same time it was not wanting the kid to wake up alone that held him in place in the hospital room.

Sam pulled out his laptop determined to get some work done on upcoming court documents as Jack remained peaceful in his bed. An orderly came in at some point to deliver a lunch tray for the boy.

After about a half-hour though Sam could hear Jack’s breathing speed up and set aside the computer concerned.

A thin veil of sweat bloomed across the teen’s forehead and the muscles of his face grew tense, teeth clenched. He was in pain.

Sam pushed the nurse call button, but when they arrived they explained the pain medication was originally given when they were resetting his wrist and they were letting it wear off until they had a better idea what was going on in Jack’s body.

The thought made Sam wince but as there was nothing he could do he tried to ignore the sounds from the bed and go back to typing up his court document.

It worked for all of ten minutes.

Jack started to move around restlessly in his sleep and finally, Sam heard a pained sigh and a soft anxious, “Cas…?”

The teenager had woken up.

He pushed himself up on one elbow coughing into the crook off his arm and blinking around owlishly searching the room for his uncle.

Jack’s eyes met Sam’s only for a moment before he seemed to shrink into himself again looking down to study his bed covers. The dazed drugged look in his eyes had passed but it was replaced with a pained glassy awareness, like he was looking at the world through a feverish haze despite the fact the monitor only read a mild ninety-nine point seven degrees.

Sam cleared his throat and finally gave an answer, “He… he went with Dean to sort something out at the hotel…”

“O-oh…” Jack said disappointed still not looking up, fiddling with a loose string on the edge of his blanket before sinking back against his pillows.

Sam searched for some way to help cheer him up feeling like “The Problem”™.

“Castiel should be back soon they just had to pay for the hotel and pick up his car from the restaurant you went to last night…”

Jack nodded against his pillow noncommittally, wincing slightly at the movement.

“Are you in pain?” Sam asked stupidly already knowing the answer.

Jack eyed him warily pulling the thin hospital blanket tighter around him, “I’m alright, headache…”

There was a long pause before Sam tried again, he couldn’t blame Jack for not wanting to talk to him. Even before the incident in the graveyard they’d never been close. He didn’t think being in as vulnerable a state as he was at the moment would make him much more comfortable around Sam.

Most of Sam’s memories of Jack were of a tiny crying blonde baby that grew into a shy but curious toddler who sucked on his fingers and took to following his much older brother around the Winchester’s house. When Sam couldn’t find an excuse to stay at his mom’s or be out he rarely volunteered to watch the baby unless there was no other option. Because at the time that was all Jack was, “a baby,” who cried and got into things and required Sam to be around John longer than he cared to be.

For Sam the first two years of Jack’s life were a game of avoidance with their father and by extension Jack himself. The only consolation was that Jack had probably been too young to retain any memories from that time…

And it wasn’t as if any of the newer memories Jack had created of his older brothers warmed him to either of them. John’s funeral, a no-contest court hearing when Jack went to live with Castiel full time… and now the one time he’d tried to open up to his half-siblings he’d just gotten burned. They’d be lucky if he ever trusted them again, even in a situation where he wasn’t alone, and terrified, and feeling absolutely horrible in a fucking hospital.

Sam pushed away the urge to descend into another self-hating spiral.

“They brought you lunch…” Sam tried pulling the cover tentatively off the tray and revealing it’s rather unappetizing contents.

Jack just blinked at him and coughed hoarsely into his arm, his breathing was still wheezy but at least it didn't sound alarming like choking like before.

Sam pushed the buttons on the bed controls to push the back of bed into a more upright position like he’d seen the med student do before.

At least there didn’t seem to be blood this time...

“Th-thanks but I… I’m not really hungry…” Jack rolled over onto his side facing away from Sam trying to clear his throat.

Sam sighed a little to himself with a pang of concern. When was the last time Jack had eaten? He’d been sleeping most of the morning and early afternoon and Sam remembered Castiel mentioning he’d had very little to eat at the diner the night before.

“You should still have something,” Sam said, trying to think of what Castiel would want if he was there.

“I mean there’s…” he looked over the paltry spread, a meat sandwich of some sort, a mug of rather gray looking chicken soup, a fruit cup, and… “there’s lime jello, that looks good?”

Jack grumbled mumbling something that sounded like "then you eat it", before looking up and hugging himself with a grimace, “No thank you.”

“Well… the nurse said they could bring you something else if this didn’t…”

“Sam…” Jack interrupted him sounding a little frustrated.

Sam quickly shut his mouth.

“I… sorry,” Jack looked down at his lap poking at the splint on his sore wrist with his free hand, “I just… my head hurts… and my stomach’s kind of bothering me…”

“Do you feel like you’re going to be sick?” Sam asked cautiously rubbing his hands together in front of him to suppressing the urge to lunge for the nurse call button again.

“No!” Jack said quickly blushing pink crossing his arms in front of him, “It just... hurts, it’s probably f-from…” He coughed roughly again into the crook of his elbow, “coughing so much…” he muttered frustrated.

“I just,” he sighed, “I just want to rest okay?” Jack attempted to give Sam a reassuring smile that didn’t quite cover the pain lurking in his dark bruised eyes.

Sam sat mouth slightly open for a moment before deciding to let the subject drop and covering the lunch tray again, “Okay…”

Jack tried to get comfortable under his covers again and Sam tried to get back to working on his laptop. But when he caught Jack’s eyes again, they were looking in mild confusion at the small bear sitting in the chair beside Sam like a second visitor.

The teenager turned pink and he looked determinedly away when he caught Sam looking at him.

Sam’s mouth twitched slightly, and he thought that maybe he made at least one positive decision today.

“I um I bought him for you…” Sam said a little sheepish, holding out the bear, “I wasn’t sure if you still liked that sort of thing… but…” he trailed off.

Jack watched him unsure for a moment before tentatively reaching out a hand to take the bear, wincing a little as he pushed himself up into a seated position in bed and stared at it for a long moment. For a split second, a small smile crossed his face.

“Thank you…” He said softly, gently running the fingers of his non-splinted hand over the bear’s soft fur before going red in embarrassment again and reluctantly perching it beside his uneaten lunch on the rolling tray table facing towards him.

He settled back against the pillows and they both relaxed for a moment into silence Jack trying to settle into sleep.

It didn’t seem to work, without the painkillers he shifted almost constantly occasionally huffing sounding exasperated like he couldn’t find a comfortable position. The beads of sweat across his forehead seeming to grow more prominent, his eyes tensed shut. His lip occasionally quivering like he was trying not to cry.

Sam wished there was something he could do to end the kids suffering but he felt like anything he did would be unwelcome, just make the kid more emotionally tense and uncomfortable alongside whatever pain his body was already in.

He was relieved a few minutes later when the nurse from earlier entered.

“Are you sure you can’t give him anything for the pain?” Sam asked quickly wringing his hands slightly.

“I wish I could big man really…” She smiled thinly, more of an empathetic grimace, “but they want to run more tests without any drugs in his system for reference… and I’m just coming in him to prep him for the LP…”

“LP?”

Sam and nurse Master’s looked back to see Jack peeking at them warily over the sidebar of the bed, “what’s that?”

The nurse looked a little hesitant for once before smiling in an ‘oh honey’ way that was not at all reassuring.

“It’s a procedure to collect spinal fluid and test pressure around your spinal cord, I believe the doctor is trying to rule out possibilities for what caused you to have a seizure,” the nurse began moving the lunch tray onto the empty seat beside Sam and setting the bear at the foot of Jack’s bed.

“Sp-spinal fluid,” Jack mumbled going a pale, knees pulling up to his chest.

“Isn’t that what they do to test meningitis?” Sam froze for a moment, “I thought didn’t think it was that?

Jack went more white if that was possible and looked at the nurse wide-eyed.

If looks could kill the one the nurse gave Sam would get her convicted.

“Maybe that's why they’re in a hurry to try to rule it out, ” nurse Master’s explained sardonically, before turning to Jack and speaking in a much kinder voice, “ and there are hundreds of other issues that are not meningitis that can be ruled out through spinal fluid…”

Jack was still pale but seemed to relax a little at that, “Wh-what are they going to do to me?”

Nurse Master’s explained, “What the doctor is going to do when they come in… is called a lumbar puncture, they’re going to numb part of your back and carefully use a needle to collect spinal fluid from the space between your vertebrae…”

Jack’s eyes were wide as saucers and his voice shook when he finally spoke again.

"W-will…?" He paused swallowing and looking down centering himself before speaking again hands gripping his blanket, "will it hurt?"

Sixteen suddenly felt absurdly young...

The nurse gave a practiced but not unkind answer, "The needle for numbing medication should be the worst of it, after that you shouldn't feel much more other than pressure on your lower spine.

Jack nodded and tried to smile back like he fully understood, it came off as a frightened grimace.

"Can… can it wait until my uncle gets back?" He asked hopefully.

"Wish I could do that for you kiddo, I really do, but the doctor wants to get this done as soon as possible, so I guess you're stuck with Mr string bean over there."

Both the nurse and Jack looked in Sam's direction with an unsure expression…

Sam was momentarily tongue-tied, "I um… I can just wait outside if that's better, I don't want impose if…" he trailed off seeing the nurse giving him a contemptuous look, “what?”

She shrugged, "I was just wondering, you two don’t look much alike are you really his brother or some weird perv who snuck in when we weren't looking?" the nurse said sarcasm somehow still bleeding from her monotonous tone.

Sam blinked taken aback mouth twitching irritated, "I… I really don't think that's…"

The nurse's eyebrows rose pointedly at him silencing him again.

"Jack I need to talk to your brother alone for a moment outside okay?" she gave Jack a thin smile.

Jack just nodded the prospect of what was coming, making him seem to physically and emotionally curl into himself, refusing to look at either of them.

Sam sighed setting his laptop under his chair and following the nurse outside.

And as soon as they were...

"I really don't know how things are run around here but you are really out of line…" Sam started his “lawyer voice” cut off by a withering look from the nurse.

"Are you really planning to leave that kid alone in there?" She sounded disbelieving like he’d just admitted to planning to abandon Jack on the side of the road somewhere.

"Look lady," Sam was beginning to get irritated himself, "I appreciate what you are trying to do but you know nothing about me or my family, yesterday was the first day in about six years we've seen each other, it would be…” he tried to search for the word but couldn’t find it settling on, “inappropriate… if he wanted me there he’d say so."

The nurse crossed her arms unphased, "Fine, I don’t know you, but you wanna know what I do know? I work here every damn day and I know a freaked-out kid when I see one. A kid like that? Sixteen? If you’re waiting for a personally signed invitation he’s probably not going to give you one because of macho bullshit or because he’s trying to prove how he's a 'grown-up' or something. But you want him not to talk to you for another six years? Leave him alone to get needle shoved in his back…”

Sam’s mouth hung slightly open but he had no retort for that. There was a movement behind him and he glanced back to see the doctor from earlier go into Jack's room.

The nurse’s expression hadn’t changed when Sam looked back at her, “Now I could call another stranger to stay with him during the procedure but somehow I think a familiar face might better don't you?"

Sam didn't respond glancing back again through the room window the doctor who was doing the procedure was re-introducing themselves to Jack who looked on warily, still hugging his knees.

Sam heard the nurse still talking to him "So how about you stow your shit, and go back in there?"

What if he doesn't want me there?

What if I make things worse ?

A hundred quips and excuses and things that could go wrong spun through Sam's head but he finally just sighed and said…

"Okay…"

Nurse Masters huffed and stood straighter, "My hero… now get back in there before the doctor starts without you…"

Reflexively Sam’s mouth half twitched into a polite smile back and he went back into Jack's room without another word.

The doctor looked up when the large man entered. Jack seemed to still be attempting to study for a doctorate in the pattern on his blanket and refusing to look up so he aimed his uncomfortable smile towards the doctor “Hannah.”

She offered him a more reassuring smile back, “are you the one who’s going to assist me today?

Jack’s head snapped up at that and gave Sam a look somewhere between horror and betrayal.

“I um…” Sam looks unsure, “are you sure I can do that?”

“Don’t worry I won’t ask you to do anything complicated,” she said while laying out complicated supplies on the rolling side table, Jack looking on warily.

“I just need someone to help hold his knees when he’s curled on his side for test, with the IV and his wrist it will be difficult for him to do… As long as that’s alright with you Jack?” she addressed Jack with a gentle hand on his shoulder.

Jack nodded silently eyebrows furrowed, eyes still wide.

Sam sat awkwardly in a chair near the bed pulling his it closer to the bed with a strangled squeak giving Jack a strained smile and awaiting further instructions.

The doctor instructed Jack gently to turn onto his side facing away from her. The boy complied strangely quiet aside for a few soft coughs as the doctor dropped the bed flat and carefully rearranged the wires and tubes attached to his body.

When she told Sam to provide counter-pressure for the boy’s knee as he curled up in a fetal position he could feel Jack shaking.

His eyes were clenched tightly shut, breathing shallow and heart beating rapidly on the monitor.

“Jack?” Sam asked gently worriedly.

The boy jumped violently at the sound of his own name, blue eyes opening wide pupils tiny pinpricks.

He looked absolutely petrified.

“You’ve done this before right?” Sam asked Doctor Hannah unsure.

She smiled back carefully pulling on sanitary gloves, “over a hundred times…”

Sam gave Jack what he hoped was a reassuring smile, “see it’ll be okay…”

Jack nodded lip quivering slightly, jumping at the feeling of the doctor applying antiseptic iodine to his back.

He still looked on the verge of tears.

Sam searched for some way to calm him down, something to say, “just take a deep breath… it will all be over soon…”

It didn’t seem to help, Jack’s breathing sped up further.

“Hey hey… Jack just look at me…”

The boy sniffled softly.

Sam was at a loss he knew nothing about kids, he searched the room desperate for some way to distract him.

He spotted and used the hand not supporting Jack’s knees to grab the “get well soon” bear from where the nurse had set it at the end of the bed.

“Remember him?”

What the hell Sam he’s sixteen not six…

It seemed to work though because Jack’s breathing slowed for a moment as he blinked at Sam in confusion.

“I, um… sorry…” Sam said sheepishly glancing between the boy and the bear’s duel glassy-eyed stares.

The smallest of confused smiles crossed Jack’s face quickly disappearing with a sharp hiss of pain.

“It’s alright… just the anesthetic… this is the worst part I promise…” the doctor comforted him gently.

Jack gave a tiny nod stiff as a board trying not to move but still shaking slightly. Sam set the bear back on the bed carefully taking Jack’s hand with the IV.

“It’s okay…”

Jack just bit back a soft strangled noise and gripped his hand tightly until the anesthetic needle was removed.

“The, worst part’s over Jack, but I need you to hold very still for the next part alright?” the doctor says gently.

“O-or what?” Jack mumbled nervously not daring to move to look at her.

“Don’t worry where I placing the needle save for a freak accident there in next to no chance it would cause anything like paralysis, if that’s what you’re concerned about…” the doctor comforted, “But still we want to be very careful…”

That didn’t seem to relax Jack very much but he nodded sheepishly, “I… I’m sorry,” he looked forlorn and like he was embarrassed for even asking.

Sam tried to cheer him up again letting go of his hand just long enough to bop the stuffed bear on the head with his finger.

Jack shot him another weird look but gave him another soft bemused smile through watering eyes and he tried to take deep shaky breaths, hand closed tight over Sam’s again.

When it came time for the needle he fixed the bear with a death stare.

Sam felt numbness spread across his fingers as the boy’s hand tightened as the needle was inserted into his back.

He silenced the knee jerk reaction to tell Jack to ease up when he saw the paralyzed fearful look the teen's face. Tears start to roll unbidden down his face.

Sam couldn’t even convince himself to look at what the doctor was doing on the other side of Jack without feeling woozy he could only imagine what the experience was like for the one going through it.

Unsure what else to do Sam found himself mumbling platitudes.

“It’s alright… You’re doing great… It will be over soon…” the words seemed empty and he felt stupid and for saying them, Jack barely knew him why should he listen, but slowly, surely he felt the boy’s hand loosen a little.

And then before he knew it...

“Aaanndd…we’re finished…” doctor Hannah said smiling gently setting aside the last of three small sample tubes and beginning to clean and bandage Jack’s back.

Sam was surprised Jack didn’t immediately dissolve into a puddle of jello instead just quickly letting go of Sam’s hand and turning a little pink, “thank you…” he mumbled bashfully.

Sam smiled awkwardly back as if he wasn’t flexing his fingers trying to get the feeling back just out of sight.

“Now I’ll want you to lay flat on your back for at least an hour after this, and if you feel like you’re getting a headache that’s perfectly normal…” The doctor said as she cleaned off the last of the iodine.

“I already had a headache…” Jack mumbled, suddenly wincing and giving a hiss of pain as the doctor pressed down on part of his back.

She paused and frowned, “did that hurt?” she asked concerned, cautiously pressing her hand down near the same spot, worryingly far away from the injection site.

Jack gave another wince of pain but nodded.

The doctor’s frown deepened and she moved to touch the same area on the opposite side of the boy’s back getting a similar reaction.

Sam felt genuine concern start to build up in his chest, “Jack said he was having stomach pains earlier,” he found himself blurting.

Jack gave him a look of betrayal but after the doctor finished bandaging the procedure site he obediently rolled onto his back and raised his arms above his head when she asked and let her gently probe his abdomen.

His face screwed up and he actually whimpered when she applied pressure to one side, slightly below his ribs.

Unlike before the doctor’s face was uncomfortably anxious.

“Is… is that bad?” Jack asked nervously.

The doctor's mouth opened and closed before settling on a tight line, “I… I want to run a few more tests…”

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Oof And I'm back from vacation :) Sorry this took a few more days than I thought but the chapter turned out longer than I thought 21.5 pages instead of my usual 14. So... really it's about a chapter and half long, please enjoy.

I'd really love to know what you liked or what you think, even if it's just a sentence or two or a quote you enjoyed. It really, really helps me improve as a writer and gives me confidence knowing people are interested.

#SPN #Supernatural #Dean Winchester #Castiel #Sam Winchester #Jack Kline #fanfiction #whump #humor #illness #family drama #crowley #Meg Masters #Hannah #TW needles #5 points to anyone that can guess what's happening to Jack at the end of the chapter

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