#I do not understand solasmancers | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

kcwriter-blog · 3 months

Text

Another Take on Solas' Conversation About the Dalish and Other Things

I know I’m preaching to the choir, but I’ve been seeing enough negative takes on Solavellan and Solasmancers in general on my dash that I feel the need to vent a little. I realize that most negative takes boil down to “I hate this ship and there is something very wrong with you if you like it” and I mostly ignore them but this time I have a few thoughts to share under the cut.

As far as I can tell, the dislike starts with the conversation between Solas and the Inquisitor about the Dalish. Apparently, this comes off as condescending? I’m pretty sure the people that use that word don’t know what it means. The way Vivienne speaks to the Inquisitor is condescending. Solas is just angry and bitter.

If he were being condescending, the conversation would be more along the lines of “My dear, I understand that having grown up among the Dalish, you are going to be a bit biased, but really you can’t possibly believe that the Dalish know everything there is to know about their history.” Condescension is being simultaneously polite and catty. It’s The Game.

Back to the conversation. Solas tells Lavellan on the way to the Temple of Ashes that his dealings with the Dalish did not go well. He tried to tell them about their history, they didn’t like what he had to say because it contradicted their beliefs, and they tossed him out on his “flat” ears. He also says that the Dalish did not believe he was one of them.

He’s understandably bitter but not entirely for the reasons we think. Yes, part of it is about ego, but mostly it’s about how closed-minded the Dalish are. Solas hates closed mindedness. He values curiosity and he is willing to debate ideas. He went to the Dalish because as the self-proclaimed keepers of elvish lore and the people searching to reclaim their lost history, he thought they would not only listen but be excited to learn more. They weren’t.

When Lavellan asks about his views on elven culture, he lashes out. Not because he thinks she’s stupid but because he expects her to be as closed-minded as the Dalish he has already met.

Lavellan for her part can react in several different ways. People that don’t like the romance assume that the top option where she calls him ha’ren is her agreeing with him. It isn’t.

I used to work in human resources back in the dinosaur age. My job was to listen to employee complaints and keep them from suing the company. I was taught how to make an employee think I was on their side without actually agreeing with them. That’s what I think the top response is. She needs his expertise. She needs him to be on her side. Antagonizing him doesn’t help her so she decides to diffuse the situation.

She addresses him respectfully. Then she says, “If the Dalish have done you a disservice.” She isn’t saying, “Yeah dude they were jerks.” She is saying If (a conditional) which roughly translates to “I wasn’t there. I don’t know what happened, but you seem pretty upset.” She isn’t agreeing just acknowledging his feelings.

She continues with “I would make that right.” She knows he’s upset because they didn’t listen to him. It costs her nothing to say, “I’m willing to listen and keep an open mind.” That’s all she is saying. She doesn’t say she is going to believe him. She is not going to go out among the Dalish and preach the gospel of Solas. She’s just willing to listen.

She then turns it back on him. She asks a question. “What course would you set for them?” Again, she’s not agreeing with him. She’s simply asking him to stop bitching and figure out how the Dalish could do what he is suggesting.

The end result is that Solas apologizes, recognizes that there isn’t a way for the Dalish to do what he wants them to do and settles down. Is he still salty? Sure. He also recognizes he shouldn’t take that out on Lavellan.

Most of Solas’ conversations with Lavellan run along the same lines. He tells her about the pre-Veil world, she says “It sounds like it would be wonderful.” Again, not agreeing that it was, just that the way he describes it sounds wonderful. There are a lot of other examples.

Basically, Lavellan is smart and canny. She can meet Solas as an equal on his own ground. She is willing to admit he knows stuff she doesn’t and to take his advice if it seems sound. She doesn’t have to, and yeah, he can be salty about that, but the only reason we don’t know if your other advisors disapprove of you disagreeing with them is that their approval system is hidden.

You can disagree with him and still gain enough approval to trigger the romance etc. All you have to do is ask questions, keep an open mind, help other people and be merciful when you sit in judgement. It’s not that hard.

I’ve heard it said that he treats her like a child who doesn’t know anything. Hello? Is there another Fade expert in the house? Does your Lavellan know everything there is to know about The Fade, spirits and demons? No. No more than she knows about spying, the nobility or directing an army. No one thinks what Cullen tells the Inquisitor is condescending or treating her like she is a child or an idiot. Also Solas does know a lot of things she doesn‘t because he was there. He is sharing that info. He won’t share it if you don’t ask him questions about it.

Another charge. Solas is cold. He is certainly aloof but in his post-Fade kiss conversation with Lavellan he is almost playful. He is concerned about where it might lead but he is almost happy. He admits he isn’t usually thrown by things that happen in dreams, but he is “reasonably certain we are awake, now and he would enjoy talking.” That’s not someone cold and aloof. That is someone reaching out.

Another charge. Solas makes Lavellan chase him. Nope. As attracted as Solas is to Lavellan he would much rather she focus her attentions elsewhere. That’s why he asks for time to think. He’s hoping she will wander off and flirt with someone else. Lavellan drives the relationship. He gives in against his better judgement. It isn’t a game to him.

Another comment is that you have to work hard and break down a lot of barriers to romance him. Um, yes? He is constantly saying he has trust issues. If Lavellan wants to pursue a relationship knowing that, then she only has herself to blame for the outcome.

I’ll just end by saying I was in a truly toxic, emotionally abusive relationship. Not the kind of relationship where you get a drink with friends and say “Yeah he was totally toxic.” The kind of relationship where you need professional therapy to deal with it. If anyone is going to be triggered by that romance it would be me. I’m not. I know what it is like to be condescended to, to have someone constantly say or imply that you are incompetent and worthless. Solas doesn’t do those things. He is impressed by her, he admires her, he thinks she is competent enough to go to when he needs help. He tells her that. Trust me, an emotional abuser does none of those things.

Anyway, thanks for listening.

111 notes · View notes

misculenica · 1 year

Text

"Solas, var lath vir suledin!" - a heartbreaking goodbye

I want to talk about this a hot second.

It can translate to "Solas, our love can/will endure!".

But it kind of doesn't, and this will break your Solasmancer heart...

Looking it up word for word, it translates more to;

"Solas, our love way endure/endurance"

Elven/Elvish is a funky language, and bioware hasn't quite gotten the gist of it themselves, tbh. But at the very least we can understand the language as very metaphorical/requiring heavy context to understand any given sentence.

vir suledin means 'the way/path of endurance', which yes, makes the sentence essentially 'our love can/will endure'

But consider that suledin doesn't just mean to endure/endurance (the concept to endure something), the word 'din' exists there (meaning death/dead'). The word means (something) death... Endure... Death.... Until death. It literally means until/to death.

Vir doesn't mean 'will' or 'can' - it means way/path. It's a journey, that's typically spiritual in nature, a way to a state of being/understanding (Vir Tan'adahl, Vir Abelasan, Vir Dirthara). It's metaphorical, it's spiritual/mental/emotional.

Vir suledin - the way until/to death

"Solas, our love journeys/travels until death"

She's basically saying 'til death do us part', that within themselves, in their minds, their love for one another will last until the very end, or even if it leads to their deaths. It's "I'm with you always, even when I'm not around, and you're with me always, even when you're not around, until we're nothing anymore" and fuuuuuck.

She's reassuring him that he won't die alone, because he'll always have her with him in spirit.

Essentially:

"Our love is real and it will carry us to the end"

And the heartbreaker of this?

#dragon age #dragon age inquisition #solavellan #solavellan hell #solasmancer #solas #lavellan #dragon age trespasser #this is why i adore this romance so much

284 notes · View notes

orangegoodboy · 1 year

Text

Dear Solas fans, Solasmancers, and dingleberries, I humbly ask this question.

Why do you all love the egg

I wish to understand the hype

#dragon age #dragon age inquisition #dragon age dreadwolf #solasmance #solasmancer #solas #solas x inquisitor #egg #eggs #egg fan #egg fandom mystery #bald people

12 notes · View notes

mogwaei · 2 years

Note

Pppssstt, I'm devouring your ouroborous fic faster than I thought possible, and I was just wonderin if you're planning for them to all live laugh love at the end, or if it's actually gonna be an all hurt no comfort kinda thing. I'm expecting BioWare to do the latter and I'd rather live a lie and delude myself with Solasmancer fix it fics than be sad 🥲

Hthehdhfh I DIE, I'm so so happy you're enjoying it so far lolol thank you for giving it a chance!

But man what a loaded question!

I don't want to spoil the ending(s) but I don't mind saying that it will be something like "bittersweet with a side of hope"? The characters will all have their different endings from their POVs (Dhrui, Mao, Yin & whoever else)....so depending on who you ask, their answer might not mean the same for someone else.

I've taken a lot of inspiration from the Bioware and how they write their endings. So like, how even the most ideal one still has its drawbacks? That sounds ominous af I'm so sorry, I just rly don't know how else to answer without giving anything away🙈 IT'S COMPLICATED. I feel you in wanting to know what you're getting invested in, but I've been working on this for years now and giving anything away would not make me feel very good lol, I hope you can understand! But if not, thank you anyway! I've put my entire soul into that story and I can promise you I'm not writing my character's endings lightly!

Hope you have a lovely day, anon! 💜🌿🌻

(Link to Ouroboros here)

#mogwaei.txts #dragon age: ouroboros #i can't express to anyone how much it means that anyone reads that long loooong story😭💚 tysm

7 notes · View notes

panarchie · 11 months

Note

For the ask game:

6, 8, 16, 24, 25

6. which ship fans are the most annoying?

solasmancers, for several reasons. don't get me wrong - some of the best and most creative and nicest people I have met in this fandom have romanced solas, but they are not solasmancers (listen, solas was my first dragon age love interest, too, because I had a console before I had a game-worthy computer, and yet I am not a solasmancer). they like to play pain olympics, are whiny as hell even though "the mage will betray you" is a well known bioware trope, some are very enthusiastic about potentially committing mass murder/genocide in game, and the most ferocious, pessimist, pre-emptive haters of DA:D that I have seen are usually solasmancers.

8. common fandom opinion that everyone is wrong about

fen'harel isn't actually part of the elven pantheon, nor is he part of the forgotten ones. elven - and theodosian - mythology has many motifs about symmetry and balance. the creators are led by mythal and elgar'nan, who represent two sides of the same coin, two aspects, two manifestations who mirror each other. the forgotten ones and the evanuris work much the same way. and fen'harel was said to walk among both, since both sets of gods recognized him as one of their own. as lore currently stands, I don't think fen'harel belongs to either; I think he might be a manifestation of something else entirely.

16. you can't understand why so many people like this thing (characterization, trope, headcanon, etc)

dragon age is full of choices and obviously, the biggest and most controversial of those is the recruitment of templars vs mages in inquisition. like everyone in this fandom I have many thoughts on this. but: I do not understand people who choose harrowmont over bhelen as king of orzammar. like, yeah, bhelen is an ambitious piece of shit, but he is also orzammar's best choice. and in the case of the dwarves, they need cutthroat politics to not go extinct. harrowmont's rule just makes their problems worse in the long run.

24. topic that brings up the most rancid discourse

in my experience, sera and vivienne. people love to hate on sera because she has many internalized issues as a result of having a terrible fucking life as a multiply marginalized person. people love to hate on vivienne for having an extremely biased opinion on a controversial topic that concerns herself more than other non-mages who would love to "engage in discourse" about it. both are stand-ins for real life issues that regularly drive me up the wall, and, added into the mix, both are outspoken and unwavering, and an elven/black woman.

26. common fandom complaint that you're sick of hearing

"the elves are getting too much attention in the games/books/comics/fandoms". elves are one of fantasy's most popular little add-ons to extant reality. the elves in dragon age are complex, layered, interesting, and have a longer history on the continent than humans. they are also the race chiefly oppressed by humans, who are both more numerous - thanks to genocide and slavery - and have also landed on thedas as immigrants, possibly invaders, when the elves were already an advanced civilisation. you could only even play an elf in 2 out of 3 dragon age games. you know who's fucking everywhere in the games? humans. you know who isn't, because of their population growth issues, and the places where the games where set up until now? dwarves and qunari. it's almost as if the worldbuilding has some influence over what and who we see in the games.

#ask game #I love violence #thank you for asking #chaotic-gay-is-my-alignment

1 note · View note

yes-these-obsessions-are-healthy · 1 year

Text

Being a thirsty Solasmancer is wild because within the canon of DA:I, Solas explicitly does not fuck, but fanon designates that not only does he fuck, but he fucks severely.

It’s really hard to stay the course and keep true to canon because canon deprived us of what literally every other romances in Origins, II, and Inquisition got. It does add to the tragic, spiritual theme of the love, but damn does it suck to remember “oh wait, canonically this could not have ever, ever happened during the events of Inquisition”. 😭

We do get that line that amounts to “I’m grim and fatalistic. That it draws you into bed with me is a nice perk”, which, if we are taking it at its strict meaning, is that he and the Inquisitor literally just share a bed and do nothing else in it, which now that I think about it, speaks to how powerful the platonic side of the relationship is. In fact, you could go even further and say that sharing your bed with Solas is a deeply intimate/meaningful gesture, because if there is one thing the man loves, it’s exploring the Fade in dreams, and he has dreamt alone for how many centuries, millennia. Sleeping together is not just ‘we are sharing a space in a manner that is reserved for those we trust and feel comfortable with”—he is also sharing one of his..dare I say, hobbies with you. The very act of sleeping together is like drinking a pint with the Iron Bull, or playing pranks with Sera. What makes it even more special than those amusements is that you are doing this with him for 6-8 hours straight, and it’s a necessary function, so yeah, it’s doubly convenient. It all lines up in such a simply splendid way.

But as I was..fandom creations that depict Solas having sex with the Inquisitor within the confines of Inquisition’s core game (or even Trespasser, I guess), is an act of terribly understandable wish fulfillment, but writing him having sex with the Inquisitor DOES change an aspect of his character, tweaks it a bit. The opportunity to “lay” with the Inquisitor while hiding his true self is one he does not take, canonically, out of principle. For a Solas to have sex with the Inquisitor, his character would have to break that link in his inscrutable moral chain. The thing about ethics, morals, people, characters, is that so much can postulated based on what line they will not cross. Clearly, Solas holds honesty in sexual relations to be important. He would not have sex with the Inquisitor under false pretenses, or more specifically, with a partner who was not fully informed on who exactly he was, because he is correct to assume that someone who had the full picture might hesitate to jump into bed with him, but that option was not able to be presented for obvious reasons. So he stamped the whole sex thing with an “N/A” and left it at that. He wasn’t going to allow a lack of information to affect the Inquisitor’s decision—he was not going to take the risk of it unfairly swaying in his favor. It would be unethical in the highest degree. The man may lie “by omission”, but he wasn’t going to let those lies deliver him the use of someone’s body like that.

#solas #fanon

3 notes · View notes

totentnz · 1 year

Note

for the alternate love intrest ask game: athras and iron bull? >:)

Send me an OC + an alternate love interest for them and I’ll tell you what I think of the idea

ok let me preface this by saying i have NEVER played the iron bull romance and did i just watch a video to get a grip of it? absolutely (side note: i hated hearing the inquisitors voice again bc athras! does! not! sound! like! that!) but anyway: (this turned into somewhat of a liveblog so i'm putting it under a cut lmao

my initial thoughts before watching it are: i cant see a romance happen, i have never had bull high up on my approval list but they might fuck casually (she would totally peg him) HOWEVER

ok after watching it (and clearly losing my mind and track a few times) the answer is basically the same: romance? no. casual sex? maybe

this was a fun thing to do!! thank you so much for asking bunny 💜💜💜

i have always appreciated it when bull pulls the inquisitor to the side and shows them what the soldiers think of them and athras would appreciate that as well (not that she would ever admit to it)

the tavern scene after the dragon fight? hell to the nah, i enjoy that scene personally but it always frustrated me because athras would not act like any of the options lmao but you know she might take the first sip and after that? who knows! winky face

ok the scene on the battlegrounds? where you hit him with the stick? she'd indulge him at first but would be dismissive towards the end (not good for romance is it?) she understands people deal with their fears differently but that whole scene has a weird (to me) sexual undertone (even before the flirtation) and i don't vibe with that (though "you like it rough huh? only from you" is pretty s tier i gotta admit and athras would like it)

being introduced to the chargers? love that (like many lavellan players it annoys me to hell and back that bull tries to explain the dalish to me, but that's not really his fault) she also appreciates that he took a dalish in after they were cast out (funfact: dalish and athras have the same vallaslin ingame (my hc is that each clan has different ones but dirthamen yes) i also love that interaction with stitches, athras is a self proclaimed potion expert so they would get along (or they would hate each other - her and the guy where you brew potions at the start of the game had a bit of a feud going on bc she thought he didn't know shit about potions) "it's a poltice, ser, you're not supposed to drink it" is ENGRAVED into my memory (ok now im just talking about athras instead of the romance, i apologise lmao)

sidenote: since bull keeps talking about redheads, athras has a sister (also with the inquisition) who is a redhead so that's actually pretty funny to me and i have never thought of it before

SO the dreadnought huh? ofc athras saves the chargers - she's not as loyal to the inquisition as she should be but she never wanted the position as inquisitor anyway (much like she didnt want to be first and eventually keeper to her clan) also hissrad meaning keeper of illusions/ liar and athras having dirthamen (god of secrets) vallaslin??? iconic maybe i do need this romance in my life lmao

god that fucking fight on the battlements?? where bull gets poisoned? another memory that's drilled into my skull, very iconic also that scene made me realise that maybe solas and bull aren't all that different (we know this but sometimes it's good to experience it again)

ok i see we are getting to the actual interesting parts that i never got to see lets gooo OH BOY OH BOY we don't like that one LMAO "you don't know what you are asking for" and him being all dominant? athras is not into that but we will see, we will see 👀

OH NO not legit admitting to manipulate people (i know what he means and this is all flirty but bad vibes bad vibes (don't get me wrong im into it personally but athras sure as shit isn't (yes as a solasmancer i'm putting on my clown makeup right now)))

i do like the setting rules and a safeword interaction though HOWEVER if it ever got to that point athras would laugh in his face ("don't quote the old magic to me, i was there when it was written")

OH I LOVE that dragon tooth thing, that's cute

BRO DID HE JUST-- i like that sneaky romance and so does athras but BOY does she hate pda

CULLEN i remember this from back in the day, athras loves bullying him so this is amazing all of their reactions are so fun i love it I SEE YOU JOSIE BUT YOU ARE TAKEN (by fisara, athras' sister, which makes this even more awkward lmao) OH THE BOSSINESS FROM THE INQUISITOR i am stanning so hard right now

also this fucking portrait has me cackling

NAH BRO NAH BRO not kadan meaning "my heart"

YES YES YES BALCONY SCENE HERE WE COME ok that scene was kinda underwhelming but i guess that scene was always better in my mind

i will never get over the fact that at the end of the game you are actually on the balcony with your LI like AAAA can you imagine my face when replayed it for the cullen romance (i dont wanna talk about it) ??? complete and utter shock

ok that scene was good, the lovebite? the compliments? chefs kiss (though athras wouldnt be into being "marked" like that she's usually the one marking others)

oh god it's trespasser time oh no

oh i always liked the dragon skull scene and i gotta admit it works better with the romance! but again.... athras would be even worse at this than the lets her be

bro not the exchange of "i love yous" in the face of uncertainty!! im gonna combust (once again not athras style, she'd rather leave things unsaid than say them in a situation like that)

god im so glad they didn't show solas in this video, i would have gone insane

he kept the necklace! ofc he did but that's still a good thing :) sure hope he won't betray us or hasn't betrayed us before :)

#sammy says shit #asks #holy shit that was a rollercoaster #if anyone read all of this? i love you #if not thats also fine lmao i get it #also if you think i proofread this think again

0 notes

luobingmeis · 3 years

Note

im dropping in to say that I both want to hug and punch Solas at the same time... Was that Tevinter!! Holy shit (oh and hearing Varric made me tear up) 🤡

i really do have to admit that i saw solas and was like “ohhh now i understand solasmancers” akjdskjsdjksdjk but i still wanna hit him!!!!

AND I THINK THAT WAS TEVINTER AND........ MAGIC FLOATING BUILDING?????

and yeah :’) our favorite trusty dwarf :’)))

#answered #also @ solasmancers: im only goofing w/ u guys!!!#Anonymous

5 notes · View notes

d035th15mak3m3l00kc00l · 4 years

Text

Solas Romance

This is a bit that I wrote when I played through a Solas romance. It’s pretty common for me to write through a romance, and lucky for y’all Solasmancers it doesn’t include all the many problems I had with Solas as a romance option. (he’s problematic, mkay. Sometimes that’s the draw, I get it.)

Since I’m currently going through and clearing out my unused creative writings, I figured this would be a nice place to dump it. It’s from when they first meet, right up unti the balcony scene.

Enjoy. Or, you know, don’t.

----------------------------------------------------------------------

Solas first got Willow’s attention when he showed her how to close the rift. It amazed her that he thought to use it that way, and that it worked successfully. She doesn’t think it’s something that will stop amazing her. Later she talks to him at haven and he explains to her how being in the fade so much has made him the elf he his. She understands how he feels the way he does, and envies him his ability to explore a world she could never touch.

His bravery, both in approaching Cassandra as an apostate and then in his decision to stay afterwards impresses her, and she determines to do what she can to make sure the humans appreciate it. Later, hunting for ram meat in one of the few activities she’s done lately that she’s actually comfortable with, he proves to be a skilled hunter and useful person to have around. She admits to herself that he has her full attention now, and she finds herself observing him when he’s not paying attention. He fascinates her, and she looks forward to every chance she has to question him on his life. Despite this, Willow’s interest in Solas is pure curiosity, and nothing emotional. But even in their early interactions, there’s a strangeness she has not experienced before. He mentions her grace, and when she questions him on it he replies it is a fact, not an opinion. Why this affects her, she does not know. She says she likes talking to him, and notes his eyes changing, a brief flicker quickly hidden. He seems so smooth and sure, but her saying she wants to help him makes him stutter. She does not know why when she walks away the conversation stays with her. She does suspect he has been observing her too.

As the days go she appreciates having him around more. His beliefs seem to run parallel to hers, and things she has to explain to others, even with the result of them still not understanding, he seems to instantly. She comes back from a particularly tough day and he doesn’t need details, already seems to know. She tells him how much she appreciates him being...him.

Solas guides her, keeps her in his confidence, points the way in the shadows to keep her on the highest path. Even as she gets closer with the humans, he becomes an anchor point that keeps who she is steady. He is not like any of her kind who she has known before, and she likes that. She like’s his seriousness, his strangeness. The gravity in which he sees the world. One day she goes to talk to him, and instead he talks about her, about how they met and the circumstances surrounding it. It’s all perfectly innocent, until he says something that drops the ground below her feet. Her heart speeds up, and in an overwhelming urge she wants to kiss him, so she does. It takes both of them by surprise. She goes to run, unable to process what she has done, but he grabs her and kisses her back. And she feels her whole world change. She’s never been kissed before, but it feels like both the first and last time it will happen. He shakes his head, yet does it again. It barely seems real.

Later, he apologies. She wonders if it was as ill-advised as he claims, though knows she only has herself to blame. She could not describe what happened to her in that moment, the sheer drive to touch her lips to his. She tells him he can take all the time he needs because in all honesty she needs time to think it over too. Days pass, and he has a bad time. He loses a friend and she witnesses his grief as their life fades away. When he disappears, she spends every day watching for his return, fearful it will never come. When he finally does return, she is afraid to approach him in the fear she might say something wrong.

He is quieter than normal, then when she goes to check on him he asks if she can spare some time. She doesn’t know what to expect, but it certainly wasn’t him telling her how special she is, how who she is is important. How he hasn’t forgotten the kiss. How losing her would be the worst thing he could comprehend happening. When he kisses her again it communicates more things than he could have ever put into words. It was desperate, hungry, lonely, hopeful. Despairing and cautious. Final and beginning. His arms wrap tightly around her like she might disappear and it’s the only way he can keep her there. There are so many secrets in this kiss. When he breaks away she sees a flash of all the kiss tasted of in his eyes, but his parting words drive them from her mind. “I love you, my heart.” He loves her, and his defeated stance as he walks away says it was a hard fought battle that in the end he gave in to.

(that’s it, that’s the end.)

#solas #solas x inquisitor #dragon age inquisition #DA: Inquisition #fanfic

8 notes · View notes

sassyseeker · 4 years

Text

I’ve been away for a while, addicted to a new game I got which is super cute (and did I mention addictive?), but my solasmancer heart has detected a song. Listening to some 80′s songs, I realized how this one can be seen from the perspective of a Lavellan Solas will not have sex with (not my head canon, but I understand those who think so), like they make out but he always interrupts before things get too far. I’ll be back soon(ish).

youtube

"Hurts To Be In Love" More and more Your kiss is like a half opened door I can't get in You stop me just before I begin And it hurts to be in love When you never get enough Oh it hurts to be in love This endless urge Keeps my body right on the verge We touch and then I wanna do it all over again And it hurts to be in love When you only want me half as much I tell you it hurts to be in love I'm always worried you think I'm pushing too hard Oh baby it hurts me when you tell me I'm going to far

#music

4 notes · View notes

lesbianarcana · 4 years

Text

Nyssa’s Backstory - Part I

Just realised I've been going on about Nyssa for a few weeks now and haven't actually shared anything about hir background.

So, Nyssa is my Inquisitor companion OC and I’ve been working on hir since 2014. Hir earliest conception was as a solasmancing Inquisitor but over time I developed hir in a different direction. Zie’s genderfluid and bisexual, uses zie/hir pronouns (similar to she/her grammatically) and I ship hir with Fenris, which you probably know already.

Zie’s from clan Ralaferin (same clan as Cillian and Neria, who are multiplayer characters in DAI if you didn’t know), and was First before zie left.

Some key dates and extra info under the cut. I’ll probably break this up into a couple posts as there’s a lot to cover.

9:15 - Nyssa is born to in clan Ralaferin to Yael, a healer and physician and Melek, the warleader of the clan. They already have one child, Amias, born 5 years earlier.

At that time the clan is living in the Vimmarks just outside Wildervale. Ralaferin is a big clan, and they do occasionally come into town to trade, but never in great numbers. The Vimmarks are pretty dangerous and necessitate both hunters and warriors trained in combat, hence the need for a warleader.

9:22 - Nyssa begins training under Keeper Elindra when hir magic manifests at age 7. At the time Cillian is First to the Keeper and Nyssa is trained to be his Second. When Neria’s magic manifests two years later she begins training, with the understanding she will likely go to another clan when she’s older.

9:23 - Cillian leaves the clan to study the ways of the Arcane Warrior.

9:26 - Nyssa casts a spell that goes awry during a training exercise. The resulting damage brings the locals down upon the clan, resulting in a protracted battle and a handful of deaths on both sides. To avoid further trouble the Keeper moves the clan out of the Vimmarks and they settle outside Starkhaven.

9:30 - Nyssa is chosen to be First. This causes a rift between hir and Neria, who was hir lover at the time, and the relationship sours.

Growing up, Nyssa always questioned why the clan—and Dalish elves in general—didn't play a more active role in preserving elven culture and history. It was a point zie often argued with Neria.

Things only worsened after the Arlathvhen held in Lydes, in 9:32, which Nyssa and Neria attended as representatives of Ralaferin. Nyssa openly criticised the hahren'al for what zie saw as a failure to ensure the future of the elvhen. When other, more isolationist elves also criticised Ralaferin’s former Keeper, Gisharel, and her willingness to share Dalish lore and culture with humans, Nyssa agreed with them. This turned into an argument between hir and Neria.

Nyssa returned from the Arlathvhen to find hir father had been seriously injured in a hunting accident. He passed away shortly after. When the Keeper rebuked hir for hir behaviour at the Arlathvhen, this was the last straw for hir, and zie left the clan without warning.

#dragon age #nyssa

6 notes · View notes

in-arlathan · 5 years

Text

These Stolen Moments

More Solavellan fanfiction, yeah! <3 ______

Time period: During DA:I Characters: Female Lavellan (Elenara Lavellan), Solas, Leliana Pairing: Solavellan Chapters: 1/1, Length: 2,971 words Rating: PG-13, Teen And Up Audiences

Summary: One night at Skyhold, Lavellan finds herself unable to rest. Trying to find peace in the Inquisition library, Solas seeks her out to offer some comfort.

A/N: Like many Solasmancers, I thought the relationship between him and Lavellan deserved at least one more cut scene. But since the game didn’t give us that I spun my own little fantasy and transformed it into fanficition. It’s much more romantic than the stuff I usually write, but it made me happy so I wrote it anyway. I hope you enjoy it. <3

You can also read this on AO3.

______

The castle was quiet at last. She couldn’t recall the last time things at Skyhold had been so peaceful. Ever since the Inquisition had taken refuge in the old edifice, the courtyard and corridors had been bustling with people. Even the gardens, a place dedicated to silent contemplation, was filled with an on-going hum of conversations and prayers.

Elenara stood in the door that led her quarters in the Inquisitor’s tower and breathed a sigh of relief. She had grown so accustomed to the noise that she almost forgot the comfort of silence.

In her youth she would often steal away from the camp of her clan to seek out the quiet places in the forest. She would look for clearings or a patch of grass by a water course where she would lay down and stare up at the lush canopy and the bright blue sky beyond. In these moments, she felt the vastness of the world that made her sorrows seem small and petty by contrast. She would close her eyes and just listen to the rustling of leaves or the distant songs of birds and allow herself to just be.

How much simpler life had been back then.

Elenara readjusted the stack of books she carried with her and began walking down the great hall.

Once, she had listened to the voices of nature. Now, all she could hear was the sharp metal shriek of blades, the commands bellowed by Cullen and his officers, the battle cries of thousands upon thousands of Inquisition soldiers. And the prayers, of course. More prayers than she had ever heard before. Even at night she could hear the faithful calling out to her. Not much else seemed to exist, but the crushing burden their words carried to her.

So, she was glad for these rare moments of silence. She enjoyed the soft hissing of wind slipping down the hall, as well as the crackling of dying flames in the fireplaces.

She reached the door on her left that led to Skyhold’s rotunda and opened it. The circular room beyond was dark, just like the rest of the castle, and a pang of disappointment hit her. A small part of her had wished Solas would be awake, still working on his mural, but he was nowhere to be seen.

It’s alright, she told herself. You’ll see him tomorrow.

At least she hoped she would. Her entire relationship with Solas – if one wished to call it so – had been a constant back and forth between them. First, she had kissed him, but felt like she messed up. When she tried to withdraw from him, he held back and kissed her in return. Much later, he would come to her, admitting to having not forgotten what had happened between them, just to walk away from her. But not until they had kissed once more and he had said the words that turned her world upside down completely.

Ar lath, ma vhenan.

Her heart skipped a beat every time she remembered this moment. She was not certain if Solas had spoken in Elvish on purpose to conceal the meaning behind his words, or if he did it because he knew she would understand. Either way, she was very much aware of the meaning behind his words.

I love you.

Elenara felt her throat go tight. Solas was a mystery to her, one she would gladly like to figure out. But it would take time and if there was one thing she didn’t have in abundance, it was just that. For now, all she knew was that, if he’d stayed but a moment longer with her on that balcony, she’d told him how much she loved him in return.

You can wonder about this some other time, she thought, chiding herself like a child. Concentrate on what lies before you.

Letting out a sight, she crossed the room and slipped through the door to her left. Her steps echoed on the stone walls as she climbed the stairs to the rotunda’s upper floor.

The library was silent as well and the candles had been put out a good long while ago. Luckily, she knew where Helisma kept the flintstone she used to light them.

Elenara placed the stack of books on the chair Dorian usually occupied during his studies in the library and hurried over to the researcher’s desk. With only soft streaks of moonlight to illuminate the room, she had to fumble around before she found what she was looking for. With the flintstone in hand, she returned to Dorian’s reading nook and lit the candles on one of the candelabras. Their golden glow was soft and subtle, but it was enough to help her read the titles.

She turned to the pile of books and picked the one on top. It was a massive tome with golden letters ingrained on its cover and spine, an old Tevinter text Dorian had recommended to her to help her understand the inner workings of his homeland. The writing was so dry and tiresome, it had taken her ages to get through the text, but it had provided some insight into the cultural shift from the worshipping of the Old Gods to the Chantry, and that was good enough for her.

Scanning the spines, Elenara searched for the spot where the book was kept on the shelves. Thanks to Dorian, all of the books at Skyhold were sorted in alphabetical order which made the task of returning them to the library much easier. When she found the gap on one of the shelves where the Tevinter tome used to be, she put it back and returned to the rest of her stack.

She had just grabbed another book when she heard something. For a second, she believed it was a soldier or a servant walking from the tavern across the courtyard, but she dismissed the idea quickly. The sound had been much closer and much softer, not like the heavy cluck of booted feet.

“I see you are still awake,” someone said.

She whirled around on instinct, her senses on alert, her body ready to fight. Only then did she recognize the elven figure that moved closer from the other side of the library.

“Solas!”, she exclaimed and let out a sigh of relief. “Good Creators, you startled me!”

He chuckled softly as he stepped into the circle of soft candle light. The golden glow covered his face with stark shadows. “I’m sorry, vhenan,” he said wringing his hands. “I didn’t mean to.”

She let out a long, shuddering breath.

“It’s alright,” she told him with a dismissive wave of her hand. “Where did you come from? I thought you’d already gone to bed.”

“I was out on the balcony for some fresh air,” he said gesturing towards the door through which he’d entered the library. “Then I heard footsteps and concluded that it was you, so I came to see if you’re alright.”

“You knew that it was me … by my footsteps?” she asked, baffled.

“Of course.” He said. “Why wouldn’t I?”

“It’s just… something a hunter might do, not a mage.”

“You should never underestimate my tracking skills, vhenan.” A sly smile tugged at his lips. “I survived on my own in the wilderness for a good long while, after all.”

For a moment, he seemed incredibly young. It made her think about a conversation she’d overheard back at the Storm Coast. She and the rest of her party had been tracking down a group of red templars that sought to gain a foothold in the area, when Blackwall and Solas had started to exchange war stories. She remembered the Grey Warden being delighted to share his experiences with another soldier, and also rather perplexed.

“For all your experience, Solas,” Blackwall had said. “You don’t carry yourself like a soldier.”

And Solas had beamed at the elder man. “Oh, you should have seen me when I was younger. Hot-blooded and cocky, always ready to fight.”

She’d never admitted to Solas that she, too, had had trouble picturing him as a warrior in full armor. But now … with this smile …

It made her want to kiss him, badly.

“Why are you still awake?”, she asked quickly.

“There was something wrong with the tea”, he replied and pressed his lips together for a moment. “It was caffeinated and kept me awake long after dark. Well, keeps me awake”, he clarified and looked around the empty library. “I am still waiting for the effect to wear off.”

“I’m sorry to hear that,” she said and gave him a warm and soothing smile. She knew Solas found comfort in the Fade just like she used to find comfort in the old tales and legends of her people. Without it, life was much harder to endure.

“What about you?” he asked, looking at her intently.

She weighed the book in her hand and hurried to place it back on the shelves. “Couldn’t sleep either,” she admitted and was surprised by how tired she sounded. “There is just… so much to think about…”

Solas took another step towards her. Before she knew it, he reached around her with his left hand and placed it on her lower back. The faint smell of his skin lingered between them. Her heart jumped into her throat. Suddenly, she was very aware of his presence.

“If you like to share your thoughts with me, I’d be happy to listen,” he said in a quiet voice.

She coughed and looked away to avoid his gaze. His eyes were filled with such longing that it was almost too much to bare.

Studying the tomes on the shelf beside her, she said: “I’ve been reading all lot of these books lately. I had hoped to find some answers in the old text, but all it did was made me think. How can anyone do justice to this world? How can you set everything right, seeing all the bad things happening to good people?”

She sighed. “How am I supposed to do all this?” she asked in a much lower voice. Her throat went tight with grief and the crushing feeling of responsibility.

A saturnine look crossed his face. “I don’t know if I can provide a satisfying answer to your questions,” he said. “I’m not sure if anyone can. All we can do is trust in your capabilities to lead this Inquisition, for better or worse.”

Her lips twisted into a sad smile. “I was afraid you might say that.”

“I’m sorry,” he said again, looking more troubled than she had ever seen him.

“Don’t be,” she replied. “It’s not like any of this is your fault.”

His hand on her back twitched ever so slightly, but she noticed it anyway. These days, she seemed to notice everything about him. The slight changes in his moods, the way he carried himself when he thought no one was looking. Even the expression of serene joy and delight when he was working on his mural. He was a miracle with a thousand little details and she wanted to know each and every one of them.

“Is there something on your mind?”, she asked. “You seemed to be on edge these last couple of weeks.”

That must be the biggest understatement in all of history, she thought to herself. Solas was always on edge, especially when he was alone with her.

“It is nothing to concern yourself with,” he said evasively and his gaze flicked to her lips. “My troubles will pass, one way or another.”

“Is there anything I can do to lift your spirits?” she asked teasingly.

“A kiss might be a good way to start,” he admitted after a short silence.

Elenara raised her eyebrows in surprise. Did she hear that correctly?

“Come here, then,” she said softly and turned until they stood face to face. Her heartbeat quickened, as she placed a hand on his cheek. He let his hand slip from her back to her waist, bringing up the other one to hold her tightly.

“It would be kinder in the long run,” he’d said the last time they kissed. Since then, his words had made her wonder what he truly meant. She knew there was something between them, he had admitted it himself. Yet, he was determined to not give in to his feelings for her. But why?

Was it because she was Dalish, still?

Back in Haven, he had confessed to her that the Dalish had attacked him on sight and that he had no desire to get in touch with the clans any longer. His words had caught her like a kick to the stomach. Though it had not been her own clan who had attacked Solas, she knew it might has well have been them. She herself had fought off countless bandits in her time as a hunter.

Yet, she knew that the clans were only protecting themselves and more often than not, they had good reasons to be suspicious of strangers. But the thought of Solas being wounded by a Dalish arrow had left her feeling guilty and distressed. She wanted him to see the many admirable attributes of her people in the faint hope it would make him feel less lonely. To show him that there was no reason to be afraid of them.

Of her.

“My heart,” she breathed, caressing his lips with her thumb. She smiled at him, then guided his face towards hers. He allowed Elenara to brush her lips against his, while he drew long breaths through his nose. And she drank from him, relishing the taste of his mouth.

When she was out of breath, she pulled back ever so slightly, resting her forehead against his. Letting out a quiet satisfied moan, she let her hands slide down to his chest. He was breathing just as heavily as she was. His chest heaved under her touch.

“I enjoy kissing you far too much,” he said with a soft smile. His breath smelled of honey and herbs, sweet and delightful.

Elenara tilted her head to look at him. Was that regret in his voice?

“You make it sound like a bad thing.”

His cheeks colored. “Oh, no, that’s not what I meant,” he hurried to say. “It’s just... I’m not …”

“… used to it,” she said, finishing the sentence for him. “I know. We should do this more often, then.” She let her lips touch his once more. It was not a kiss, not quite, but it set her body on fire nonetheless. “Besides, I enjoy kissing you, too.”

She pulled him closer and wrapped her arms around his shoulders. His body tensed and for a moment it seemed like he wanted to flee from her, but when she opened her mouth and deepened the kiss, he finally relaxed. Accepting the invitation, his lips parted and his tongue entered her mouth.

There was the passion she’d first experienced back in their shared dream in the Fade. It washed over her like a rising tide, almost sweeping her off her feet. She returned his kisses with the same fire, losing herself in the embrace. She couldn’t tell if his hunger was greater than hers or if it was the other way around. All she knew was that they both wanted more, fully aware of the fact that no kiss would never be enough.

“I want you,” he whispered.

His body was radiating heat like a bonfire. She wanted to take it all in, even if she might get burned in the process. All her life, she had waited to meet someone like him. Someone that made her feel alive.

“I want you, too,” she said and kissed one corner of his mouth. He sighed softly, his eyes half-closed. It was the sweetest sound she’d ever heard in her entire life – and she wanted more of it.

With the greatest effort, she let go of him.

Elenara took his hands and squeezed them gently. “Come with me,” she said, nodding in the vague direction of the Inquisitor’s tower. Up there, in her chambers, they could continue what they had started in a more private setting.

“I don’t think…”

“Lady Inquisitor!”

She flinched.

That was Leliana’s voice!

In an instant, Solas parted from her and took a step back. The lack of his warmth right next to her hurt more than she would like to admit. “Don’t…” she gasped, but Solas simply shook his head.

“You have other matters to attend to.”

She knew he was right. If Leliana needed to speak to her at this hour of the night, it must be important. That didn’t make it any easier, though.

She only hoped her face didn’t look as warm as it felt.

“Goodnight, Inquisitor,” Solas said in a casual tone and took another step back. He bowed ever so slightly just when Leliana reached the top of the stairs. The spymaster stopped dead in her tracks and watched as the elven apostate turned on his heels and headed in the opposite direction.

Elenara felt like her heart would tear apart at any moment, when she forced herself to look at Leliana. “How can I help you?”

Leliana stared, as if she had forgotten, why she wanted to speak to Elenara in the first place. Her eyes were fixed on the doorway through which Solas had made his exit.

“Leliana?”

The spymaster blinked, her focus returning to Elenara.

“Oh, yes! I’m sorry” she said and squared her shoulders. “I have news from Halamshiral, my lady. You should look into this.”

Right back in the mess, Elenara thought as she followed Leliana up the stairs to her office.

__________

Thanks for reading. <3

#dragon age #dragon age inquisition #dragon age fanfiction #dragon age fanfic #solas #lavellan #female lavellan #solavellan #in relationship #solas romance #fluff #mild hurt/comfort #elenara lavellan

19 notes · View notes

maythedreadwolftakeyou · 4 years

Note

1, 4, and 10! (Frankly, I'm interested in all of these, but I'll take these to start!)

Thank you! These are from this ask meme

1. What made you start writing fanfic?

Hmmm you know, I had read, I think, 3 fanfics ever (i’m lumping the 3 harry potter novel-length Neville POV pdfs a friend sent me in college once into one group tho), before 2015. And always only things friends had linked to me/I wasn’t seeking them out myself. I tried looking some up once to see what the hype was about but never got interested in anything, even when the writing was objectively good (I think some Marvel, some Dr Who, etc that friends posted and which crossed my dash).

Trying to be as brief as possible on the leadup details, after a very low period for all of 2014 and while I was between jobs/living with my parents, I started DA:I just after Christmas and put in 104 hours/beat the game within 8 days, one of which I did not play at all during. So! You can say the Obsession had kicked in as they are wont to do.

I had a job lined up for March onward but nothing to do for the rest of Jan/Feb, so I played the game another two times, joined the good ol Bioware Social Network/forums, followed a bunch of new people on tumblr, and joined an online chat group or two about Inquisition! Fanfic was popular with everyone else, and while at first I wasn’t as interested in it as I was in talking about game meta/lore, after reading a couple I realized I actually enjoyed videogame-based fanfic much more than the kinds I’d bounced off before. I’m pretty sure it’s because in the games you get to make your own character/choices, so you don’t always know what’s actually coming next, and there’s someone “new” you’re reading about even if the other characters are the same. There’s just a lot more room to develop characters and side storylines while not contradicting the main plot, since a lot of what happens in games is implied/off-screen conversation/skipped over time-wise. It was also a good outlet for the mess of emotions DAI left me with (as a solasmancer: :( :( :( ), and it was people I knew who were creating it, so it was a fun way to engage with the online communities that were at the time my only social outlet.

As someone who has written my own stories since childhood (I’d won NaNoWriMo that year with an original middle grade novel concept), it was pretty natural for me to transition over, about a month after I finished the game. My first couple attempts were very much figuring things out/playing with the genre, but I jumped in pretty fast. I wrote two short/messy one-shots, a few tumblr only drabbles ≤100 words, and then the third fic I ever started is Fallout From the Fade, my on-going longfic that is now the single longest story I’ve ever written and its been uuuhhhhh 5 years whoops. It’s been a long process but I’m the kind of person who jumps around between ideas but if I latch onto something it doesn’t really leave me (even the NaNo novel from 2007… i was 15… please i dont want you in my brain anymore) so even though sometimes life takes me away from stories for a long time I always have them in my head and intend to come back to them :)

The biggest thing for me though was tumblr prompts/prompt boards. Fanfiction was the first time EVER that I was actually writing for an audience instead of myself (I have entire original novels that no one’s ever read on my harddrive). I very quickly learned that I’m good at writing angst and oh boy it’s a rush to directly hear from people that they Felt Something because of what you wrote. So most of my story stars I get from the kinkmeme or asks because then I know, specifically, that I’m writing something someone else wants to read. It’s also interesting to me in the psychology that way–I will often read through peoples blogs to get an idea of what they’re into theme or headcanon wise, and incorporate those into my works. I am very interested in the reader/work relationship and having that extra element of control over it is something I like to play with.

Wow, giant answer. Stopping there.

4. Do you think your style has changed over time? How so?

I think I’ve gotten better at writing for the conventions of the genre. Fanfic is more about emotions than plot than original work, though both can play a role/stories can vary on how much of each they put in. But the more you write about a character the more you explore their backstory, personality, motivations, etc and I think the better you can understand them to write more. Really though, I go into each fic with a different style in mind though. Some are more economical, and I put a lot of work into show-vs-tell. Some I go past purple into ultraviolet with the prose, especially for shorter works. A lot of it is self-indulgent, but I’m pretty mindful about the tone I write in and what I want it to convey when paired with that specific plot.

10. What’s a theme that keeps coming up in your writing?

I have yet to meet someone as into the concept of meta-narrative as I am. I am constantly thinking about the relationship between the reader and what I’m writing, and how that will be affecting their reading experience. I’m big on using fic to create a sense of tension, leaving people on cliffhangers wanting more, and basically using things like paragraph length/repetition/clues/word choice to either keep the reader engaged or jolt them out of the story for a moment in order to wring as much emotion from them as possible. There’s definitely times I don’t get it right but I think I hit the mark a decent amount. This is one of those things that’s “invisible” to the reader though unless they’re directly looking for it, so, I don’t know that it’s something anyone would think of unless they’ve talked to me about writing–though if you have, you KNOW i go off about meta-narrative within my first three comments.

For more traditional themes, on the physical side: as a career botanist/geologist, I am always very aware of nature and setting. Sometimes maybe too much so. So a lot of my metaphors/allusions/breaks between plot or dialogue involve nature in some way, especially plants, water, and light. I’m being very indulgent in a current WIP and going on about the weather (I HATE that weather is a stereotypical “boring conversation” marker because i LOVE meteorology and its very important!!! esspecially if u spend all day running around outside!! as both I personally and my OCs do) but I try to tone that down normally.

On the figurative side: I write a lot about mental health while trying to keep it both realistic/non-glamorized but still as big as it really feels; I write about complicated relationships and not being fully aware of your own emotions/reactions (love me a flawed narrator); about things the character has lost like family/identiy/language; and I can’t keep away from stories about self-sacrifice, duty, transcendence, futility, and rage. I have yet to write a piece that can truly be described as fluff, I think.

Aaaand I’ve gone on FAR too much already, so I’ll end it there! Thanks so much for the q’s!

#replies #ramblings #loquaciousquark #my stuff #tumblr games #my writing #fanfiction #long post

2 notes · View notes