Come on, he's Nightmare!

Swimming with Tentacles

Demon!Cecaelian!Sevika x Reader

Word Count: 3.6k

Warnings: Perverted!Sevika, Dub-Con, tentacle bondage, nudity, breast fondling, groping, being fucked with tentacles (vaginal), throat fucking, choking, dumbification, stolen panties, being touched by something in the water, goofing off with friends, skinny dipping

Summary: On vacation with your friends, you get an amazing deal on a private beachfront house. You have a great time until you find out the reason the house’s owner was so eager to rent it for lower than it was listed.

You were in awe at the gorgeous villa that you and your friends managed to get at a discount. The six of you wanted to go on vacation to the Isle of Piltover for spring break so you saved up all year to be able to afford this trip. One of your friend’s friends had come to you about this villa called the Hand of Zaun that they stayed at and you decided to try your luck. When she told you the price, you thought it might be out of your budget but when you called the owner he happily lowered it! With your housing being below your budgeted cost, you could splurge on sexier swimsuits. You were excited for a whole week of nothing but sun and fun with your friends.

“I’m still surprised that we managed to get this place!” Gia squeals flopping onto the leather couch, “This place is gorgeous! I can’t wait for tomorrow morning.” She sighs happily.

“The owner was kind enough to stock the house with food for us, too.” Terry sits down with a cup of yogurt in her hand, “He was very sweet. What was his name again?”

“Silco.” You reply, taking a sip of your water, “He said this house has been in his family for generations, but he didn’t want to live here anymore so he rents it out.”

“I can see why.” Bailey says while coming downstairs, braiding her hair, “It’s a secluded area with a private beach and it’s an hour's drive to the city of Piltover. If you want a peaceful vacation, it’s the perfect spot.”

“RRAAHH!” Sophie springs up from behind the couch, making you all scream in fright, “Where no one can hear you scream!” You accidentally knock over your water when you flinch and Terry’s spoon goes flying out of her hand.

“Sophie, what the hell?!” You shout, hurriedly grabbing paper towels to dry up the water you spilled. She laughs as you all try to calm your racing heartbeats.

“How long have you been sitting back there?!” Gia hits her on the shoulder, “You could have given me a heart attack!”

“BOO!” Sophia jumps out, making Gia shriek while the rest of you burst out laughing. You knew that when it came to pranking people, the twins never did anything without each other. Gia was the newer addition to the group, so she was easier to pick on. It helped that she was the jumpiest out of your friends and a prime target. But, Gia could give it back and that’s how she got into your group in the first place. She had pranked the twins by putting clear nail polish over their pencil tips so they couldn’t write after they switched hers out of a fake one. You welcomed her with open arms.

“Gotcha!” The twins giggle before heading to the fridge for a snack.

“So, exploring first thing in the morning?” Terry asks.

“You bet!” You grin.

A few days go by and you’re absolutely in love with the area. The villa was at the edge of the shore with a large saltwater pool that the ocean fed into. You and the girls spent time exploring the beach and shoreline on the first day, checking out the tide pools and taking pictures. The goal was to get the pictures out of the way first so you didn’t have to worry about it. On the second day, the girls wanted to work on their tans so you joined them to soak up the sun. You didn’t want to worry about any burns so you made sure to put on sunscreen. You were surprised Bailey decided to lay in the sun, but it was nice to enjoy. Then came the day you’ve all been excited about.

“Last one in the water has to wash tonight's dishes!” Terry shouts and makes a break for the water.

“Hey! No fair!” You shout, running after her while the rest of the girls complain. You laugh as you run into the water, squealing at the cold temperature, and dive underneath. The cold water is refreshing on a hot day like this so you didn’t mind that your nipples were making themselves known. You gaze around at your friends, watching them shiver at the temperature with wide grins on their faces.

“Who was the last one in?” Sophia calls out.

“It was Sophie!” Terry laughs, “She tripped on the way down.”

“You’re not supposed to tell them that!” Sophie gasps, splashing her.

“Well, I did!” Terry splashes her back but gets Gia too.

“Oh, it’s on!” Gia grins. You all end up splashing around, laughing as you try to dodge each other and get saltwater out of your eyes. At some point, Bailey jumps on you and dunks you under the water. Your startled flailing ends up with you accidentally pulling the tie on her bikini top. Bailey lets you up as she yelps and hurriedly ties her top back on. You sputter as you wipe the water off of your face and blink at your friend’s devious smile.

“Uhhh, hiya Bailey.” You say nervously.

“Hiya, Y/n!” Bailey chirps, “Nice strings you got there.” She motions to your bikini top. You two stare at each other for a moment before she lunges at you. You shriek and try to run away from her in the water. The other girls laugh as you dodge Bailey’s hands, only to gasp as you feel your top come undone. You whirl around to see Terry grinning at you, holding your bikini top in her hand.

“Terry?!” You laugh in shock, “Give it back!”

“Come get it!” Terry giggles and starts backing away from you. Little did she know that Sophia was behind her. You watch with wide eyes as Sophia undoes her top and startles her. A shout from behind you has you whirling around to see Bailey’s top gone and her snatching Sophie’s. A little chaos breaks out as Sophia and Gia get chased before their tops are yanked off.

“We’re lucky this is a private beach!” Gia laughs, laying back and letting her body float with the waves.

“I will say that this is relaxing.” Bailey sinks into the water so it reaches up to her shoulders, “It’s nice to be in the waves. I fucking love the beach.”

“Me too.” You all chorus, deciding to embrace the fact that you’re topless. You had tied your bikini top to your bottoms so you wouldn’t lose them, so you weren’t worried about it. You stand around and talk with the girls before you feel something brush against your leg. You jump up with a squeal and stumble away from where you were standing.

“What happened?” Sophie turns to you, “Are you okay?” They look at you in concern and you nod your head, brushing your hand against your thigh where you felt something. ‘Wait.’ You pause, running your hand over it again before you groan in aggravation.

“I thought I felt something touch me, but turns out it was my bikini top floating away.” You sigh. ‘It was an old bikini but that’s so annoying. I could have sworn I tied it tightly.’

“Nooo!” The girls gasp.

“Did you bring enough?” Bailey frowns.

“Yeah, I did.” You nod, “I guess I could swim naked if I have to, but I have enough.”

“Ooooh, we should do that in the pool one night!” Terry claps her hands together, “A bottle of wine, some music, candles…”

“I’m down!” Sophia chirps. You agree and make a plan to do it on Wednesday night. That way you could go into the city and pick out a nice wine, maybe get a local dish to try out. You were craving sushi and Piltover made the best in the world so you added that to the list.

The next night you were laying in bed with a book in your hands. The day was spent back out in the water - with your tops on this time - before Gia decided it’d be hilarious to untie Terry’s bottoms. You were smug that your bottoms didn’t have any ties until your friends were ganging up on you. You laughed and shrieked, kicking your legs at them when Gia grabbed you. Your friend group was a little crazy, but that’s what happens when you meet in college. You got really close to each other so doing things like this wasn’t off limits, but only when it was in certain situations. The six of you ran around like crazy in the water, pushing each other around before deciding to see who could swim out to the edge of the rock and back. You were exhausted when you came back inside so you showered and got cozy.

It was raining outside and gave you the perfect atmosphere to relax. You could hear the girls laughing out in the living room as the room you chose was right next to it. It had a sliding door that lead out to the pool and you nabbed it for that reason. You wanted to be able to go out and swim without waking up the other girls since the rest of the rooms are upstairs. Sophie had wanted it too so you flipped a coin for it and won. She pouted when you won and went upstairs with the rest of the girls.

With a yawn, you decide it’s time to go to sleep. You get up from the bed to put your book on the counter, shout goodnight to the other girls, and reach up to turn out the light when you notice something. ‘Did I forget to close the screen door all the way when I went outside earlier?’ You furrow your brow, trying to remember if you did. You groan, getting out of bed and making sure to close and lock it. While you were in a private area, it made you feel weird not having it locked at night.

In the morning, while picking out an outfit to wear into the city, you noticed that the panties you had worn the past few days weren’t in the bag you keep them in. Confused, you search through your things for them but can’t find them. You shake your head and decide to worry about it later before throwing your clothes on and heading out. In the city, you got to enjoy a wide variety of the local cuisine and flirted with a few cute girls. You made the drive back to the villa, skipping inside to get ready to go out into the water. Since you’d be skinny dipping in the pool later, you wanted to swim around while the sun was out.

“You should wear the thong swimsuit!” Terry shouts as you head for your room, “Go ass out!”

“Are you going to take the picture for me?!” You shout back.

“Hell yeah!” Terry confirms and you grin to yourself. So you put on your thong one-piece and head off with Terry to take pictures. She stands in the water while you climb onto the rocks to get a better perspective. You’re instructed on how to pose, doing various amounts before you decide to pose in a way that completely shows your ass. As you’re moving down the rocks, you freeze as you feel something wrap around your upper thighs and over your butt.

“Y/n, don’t move!” You hear Terry say in a rush, “It’s just an octopus! It was probably hiding in the rocks and it got curious as to what you are! If you relax it’ll let go on its own.” You look down and sure enough, there are brown tentacles - matching the color of the rock - stuck to your body. You tense as they wander over your lower half, a weird mix of a slippery yet velvety feel and the suction cups stick to your skin. A low heat ignites between your legs, making your thighs twitch and you’re embarrassed by your body’s reaction. You blush fiercely when you hear Terry snap a picture as your ass gets squeezed and you’re appalled at the situation. ‘I am not in this position right now. I am not.’

“You did not just take a picture!” You question in shock, turning your head to look at your friend.

“The girls aren’t going to believe me! Besides, don’t you want the memory?” She laughs.

“OW!” You yelp, jolting as one of the suction cups tightly tugs on your skin, “Ow, ow, ow, ow! What the fuck!” You gasp, struggling as your skin is pinched. Your hands clutch the rock because if you try to tear the suckers off it’ll hurt more than it does now.

“Y/n! Don’t struggle, it’s only going to grab tighter!”

“I’d like for you to stay still in this position!” You huff, suffering through the pinching until the octopus finally lets you go. You sigh in relief and immediately get off of the rock, grabbing Terry by the arm and dragging her back to the house. She teased you the whole way there, your cheeks heating up, especially when she pointed out the round red marks all over your thighs and butt. You wanted to sneak into your room, but remembered that the sliding door is locked. So you prepare yourself for your friends’ reactions as you step into the house.

“Y/n got groped by an octopus!” Terry shouts as you walk inside.

“Terry!” You whine, “Why are you so mean to me?!”

“That’s what happens when you’re best friends.” Terry winks at you.

“What?!”

“No way, that didn’t happen!”

“Where’s your proof?!” After some back and forth, you begrudgingly turn around and the girls freak out. The marks on you are perfectly round and someone mentions that they look similar to hickeys, which makes you blush even more. You go through the pictures that were taken and can’t help but laugh at the one with the tentacles on you. If you didn’t know any better, it would have looked staged from how oddly… stylized it appears. As your embarrassment cools, you get excited about skinny dipping and even up laughing about what happened. It was hilarious that you were the one to get the wild interaction when the others were the ones who actively swam around there.

“Let’s get naaaked!” Bailey shouts, grabbing the wine while Gia grabs the glasses. You giggle and slip into your room to take your clothes off, tossing them into a pile on the floor to worry about later. Unlocking the sliding door, you slip through and step down into the pool. By you, an area of the pool is hidden by seven feet of wall to allow privacy before it’s the door into the living room. You wade over to the girls and a glass of wine is shoved into your hands. You weren’t much of a drinker, so the most you’d be doing is holding it until Sophia took it.

There was music playing, bottles of wine emptying, and a charcuterie board floating around as you talked. You swim around without a care, not having to worry about bumping into a fish or stepping on something. What happened earlier is pushed to the back of your mind as you talk about what to do for your last few days. The conversation dissolved into giggles and random topics as the wine set in and you cracked up as Terry almost dropped her glass into the pool. The others get tired before you since you’re not drinking and decide to go to bed. You wave them off, saying that you’re going to continue swimming and they bid you goodnight.

With a dreamy sigh, you fall back into the water and let your body float. In the pool, you didn’t have to worry about floating away so you were content to close your eyes. The sound of the waves was all that you could hear and you love it. ‘I’m so happy we’re here for a few more days. This vacation was more than needed after last semester. Maybe I’ll see if I can go on a date with Angie. She told me that she’s interested, and I’m into her a little. I don’t know much about her outside of her major, though.’ You feel the water shift underneath you right before something starts wrapping around your body. Your eyes snap open, a scream bubbling in your throat before a tentacle slithers around your neck and chokes you. You’re yanked backward until your back collides with something and a hand covers your mouth.

“Shhh calm down.” A husky voice whispers as you struggle, “I’m going to let you go, but if you scream I’ll choke you again.” Dark blue tentacles rise out of the water, one loosely wrapping around your throat and you furiously nod your head. ‘What the fuck is going on?!’ You scream to yourself in fear.

“Good girl.” The hand is removed from your mouth and you shakily turn around as the tentacles’ hold on you loosens. Your eyes widen when you make eye contact with a topless woman. Your gaze goes down her body, taking in her appearance and you make a noise in the back of your throat when you see that the tentacles are attached to her.

“W-What are you?” You stutter out. ‘She’s not human. What is she? Are these tentacles really attached to her?’ The fear was being edged out by curiosity. There’s a creature in front of you that you’ve never heard of before, and she was - quite frankly - beautiful. You swallow, watching her muscles flex as she reaches out to grab your chin.

“The humans refer to me as a Cecaelia or a Sea Demon.” She lifts you out of the water enough to expose your chest, her eyes focused on it, “You know I’ve seen so many breasts but yours are my favorite.” You squeak as her large hands cup your breasts and she starts playing with them.

“H-Hey, you can’t-” You yelp as she pitches your nipples.

“I couldn’t help myself earlier when you came out into the water showing yourself off like that.” She smirks, you feel tentacles move over your ass and squeeze it, “Such a soft-looking ass on a beauty like you.” Even in the water you can feel their soft, velvety texture and it has your mind flashing back to earlier.

“You’re the octopus that grabbed me?” Your eyes widen, heat rising to your cheeks as a low burning starts between your legs. You didn’t know if you should be relieved that it wasn’t a real octopus or mortified. Because an innocent curious animal is easier to rationalize, but an intelligent half-human creature? ‘Wait, it was on purpose? So she knew what she was doing?! Why does that turn me on?’

“I was.” She chuckles, turning you around and wrapping her arms around your waist, “I wanted to do a lot more than that, but you had a friend. You seemed to like it though, didn’t you? And, I wouldn’t lie. Or you might miss out on what I have to offer you.”

“I-” Your words falter as her tentacles tighten around your thighs, making the burning worse,“I-I mean- I like it- Liked it! But-”

“But what?” She purrs, her hands rubbing your hips, “You liked feeling my tentacles on you like that? Like this?” You inhale sharply as a tentacle rubs against your slit. ‘Oh my God, why am I so into this?’ They twine around your body, soft yet thick muscle moving to get a reaction out of you. A reaction she was getting as your breathing picks up and you struggle to respond to her.

“Why aren’t you saying anything?” She taunts you, “Is this too much for you? Are you already so turned on by my tentacles doing this?”

“Y-Yeah…” You breathe out, a bit shocked you’re even admitting it. You were horny and curious about how it’d feel if she fucked you with them. From the way she was speaking, that’s what she intended on doing.

“Good.” She says, before the tentacle rubbing your slit pushes into you. You part your lips to moan but another tentacle enters your mouth as you do. It’s slick and salty on your tongue, pushing to the back of your mouth as you gag around it, “I can’t have you waking up those friends of yours. Besides, those pretty lips of yours were just calling me.”

The Cecaelia uses her tentacles to fuck you, thrusting down your throat and into your pussy. The suckers along the tentacles rubbed against your silky walls and provided a sensation you’ve never felt before. It made your legs tremble as it rubbed against your g-spot. Her hands found their way back to your breasts and she groped them, murmuring in your ear that your body is perfect to wrap her tentacles around.

You couldn’t say anything in response, her tentacle fucking your throat keeping you quiet. You were incredibly horny from this and enjoying it. You never thought that you’d be thinking that way at all, but she was fucking you dumb. The thoughts in your head vanished as you came and she continued to drill you with her tentacles.

“You’re my favorite human I’ve had the pleasure of fucking.” She hums, making you cum a third time, “Silco’s good at providing me with women to keep me entertained. I admit I’ve taken more from you than I have my other toys. I should stop before I break you, hm?” She pulls the tentacle from your mouth, saliva coating your lips as your incoherent babbling is now audible. Her tentacle thrusts into you roughly, forcing you to cum a fourth time before she stops.

“Come out like this tomorrow night and I’ll fuck your pretty little brains out.” She smirks, her silver eyes showing her satisfaction at your near listless state, “I might have to steal you away, human.”

TOP 10 MOST KISSABLE FACES OF JORVIK

(by crystal-tit)

(inspired by the journalists at ClickHole and The Onion)

WARNING: Most of this is a joke. And also I'd like to apologise.

10. Ms. Drake

She's a Ms. now but I could make her my Mrs. She's such a #girlboss and we love that for her! Who cares if she ruins the eco system of Jorvik, all that is important is that she's absolutely SLAYING! 🏭

9. Avalon

If there's one thing that the ladies/men love, it's mystery. And what's more mysterious than covering your entire face with a hood? "Oh my, I can't see any of that man's face!" they'll exclaim. "He must have a terrible secret I will uncover with my love."

8. Rowan

There's nothing sexier than an Australian accent. 🇭🇲 They could take you back to the land down under and you could watch them wrestle a kangaroo... 🦘 So romantic...

7. Ydris

He's so smooth. Like a water bottle. Imagine a water bottle. Now imagine Ydris. So similar yet so different... Plus there's like two (or more) tentacles in there so that's a plus. 🐙

6. Justin

Who wouldn't want to kiss a man who hasn't felt the touch of a woman for years (unless horses 🐴 count as women)(or lasagne)(I mean... horses could count as women because mares but lasagne? Hmmm...) We all have to agree he got the good genes from his grandfather! 👴

5. Sigry

Rania's mom has seriously got it going on! 👀 It would be a lie if we said we never thought of what it would be like being Dr. Eiren. She's yet another #girlboss who got on this list!

4. Erik

Hardworking lawyer and great father! Total catch and a #DILF! His eyebags make his eyes shine like stars on the night sky. 😍 I bet he could get me off the wanted list in a whim. 🤭

3. Galloper Thompson

I know the title says faces but Gunnar has got to be one of the most irresistible men out there 🤭 It's a big achievement that he looks so kissable without a face!

2. The Vala Witch

So mysterious... So pretty... So blue... So blue. So blue like blue ice slush. Do you think she tastes like ice slush? Drop your theories in the comments down below 😊👇

1. Garnok

💕💕💕💕💕granko💕💕💕💕💕

more simpatico spark eater AU please 🥺

Eeeeee ok!! :D

So, pretty much the second they find out Brainstorm is expecting they schedule a c-section with Ratchet. Perceptor isn't willing to risk their unborn sparkling literally eating his mate from the inside. They have a really difficult conversation about what they'll do if it turns out the little one is cannibalizing him in-utero, and Brainstorm agrees to a termination in that case. If he doesn't, they'll both die, so even though it hurts they both agree it's the best course of action.

Thankfully it doesn't come to that, but we can get to the actual emergence later 🤭

Nerds that they are, the parents-to-be turn the whole thing into a little science project. This is the first natural conceived sparkeater pregnancy, ever! It's uncharted territory, they'd be stupid not to observe! Brainstorm goes through a lot of really weird, sometimes painful symptoms. Like he'll get indigestion and acid reflux from hell, nauseous for days on end, stuck with a constant bought of hiccups and surrounded by a cloud of noxious, corrosive steam from the formation of the sparkling's acidic blood. It'll leave him with little burns and rust spots, itchy and sore, poor guy. Thankfully, Perceptor is a doting mate and will gladly rub special nanite gel on those sites and drags him to Ratchet once a week for a check up. He'll get weird cravings; mostly metals that can be found in living Cybertronian steel, and sweetened coolant. At one point he gets a very, very intense urge to lick a spark, and locks himself in the washracks for several hours until it passes. They record every little bit of information, because even the tiniest kernel is new and interesting and could be useful later! Weird monster pregnancy does qeird things to your body, who could have predicted?

The most normal part of this carrying cycle are the mood swings and increased sex drive--Brainstorm's usually pretty tense and snappy, or entirely mellow, and it just depends on the day. Regardless, the only one he really wants to be around is Perceptor. He's always encouraging his mate to talk to his chassis, prompting him to kiss the sparkling goodnight and remind it of their love. He's so excited to be a parent

Perceptor also gets increasingly more growly as the cycle progresses. He's already a pretty introverted guy and prefers to have his space, but now, someone gets within three paces of Brainstorm and he hisses at them. Full on sparkeater posturing; fangs bared, long glossa out, tentacles raised. He stays in front of Brainstorm and growls angrily at the other party until they take the hint and go away. He doesn't want anyone near his mate or their sparkling 🤭 though he was originally against the idea their unborn baby has become indescribably precious to him, and those sparkeater instincts push him to protect them both at any cost.

By the time the carrying cycle is at it's climax, no one can approach Brainstorm without explicit permission. Most people would find it stifling but Brainstorm is the monsterfucker onboard. There's nothing sexier than his mate growling like a rabid animal and ready to devour someone if he deems them a threat. Everyone else is 😨 while Brainstorm is 😍

I know you didn’t ask for it but- BOTW MONSTERS: RANKED BY HOW HOT THEY ARE,,,,

i do fuck all in the days lemme tell ya

ill admit i havent done EVERY enemy but like. i do enjoy making these posts so who knows, i might actually rank everything sooner or later 🤷‍♀️

,,,,, and if u want a specific ranking of botw/aoc stuff lmk 👀

ahh the ol reliable. the classic bokoblin. he is just a little lad! unfortunately they’re genuinely kind of ugly??? and the idk the singular horn in the middle aint a good look. i see cute comics abt these guys being domestic and thats adorable but also giving them so much leeway bc they’re really Not that cute. not sure what the loincloth is hiding and im not sure i wanna know anyway. 3/10 really kind of. not good. 

slightly bigger loincloth only means slightly bigger things to hide :( i rlly hate these guys noses and whatever the fuck toenails they have why do they have toenails?????? s’bad. the thing is tho they have the proportions of a potentially attractive gerudo which is probably what takes the edge off the general vibes of... u know... being an abomination. its also only JUST occured to me as im writing that these guys r just evolved bokoblins so. glow up i guess. 6/10 what that tongue do

ok bypassing whatever the fuck rule 34 has done to these guys, i actually dig them. i find the huge fat ones way cuter than the lil bug eyed ones. in their case theres rlly no, like... hotness about them. its just cute. i think they’re cute. any monster that is cute and also doubles up as a bed gets my vote 7/10 get urself a fella as flexible as these guys 

u know what, im gonna say it, these guys r actually kinda hot. proportions arent super bad, the face aint bad and generally they have good vibes. aside from, u know, when they’re tryna shank u. id say one of the most bearable monsters to have to look at. 8/10 im not a scalie

??????????? idk what to say. u could tie these little shits to like swingball poles and beat them with rackets thatd b good. aside from that these guys have like no redeeming qualities. they’re a pain in the ass and not in a good way. 3/10 cute but like. is it worth it?

i mean,,,,,,,, someones probably into it. i dont like these guys for a lot of reason and surprisingly the thing that gets me is the fucking hair why does it have that hair its like he-man just went straight over the top with an electric razor its not a good look!!! stop trying to make it work! it wont! and again with the loincloth??? im not into it. the only thing i like abt these guys is the lil waistcoats. they have some amount of decency (but the implications it makes are Not Good). uh. 2/10. barely.

,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,

,,,,,9/10. but if you see a lynel up close like that chances are you died about half a minute ago

again. ??? i dont rlly like. i mean. im digging the top heavy proportions? its got the same body type as kass so like. 4/10. bit plain around the features but what can u do. i dont understand how but the igneo taluses are like. sexier 

UGHGHHH I FUCKING HATE THESE THINGS okay okay okay like these motherfuckers lure u in by being quite cute and dancin around and then u get a look at their faces and its like fucking JESUS and its even WORSE when you see under their cloak and they have no necks????? and like????? they do that gay little fucking dance that pisses me off???? they’re wearing hoods that give the ILLUSION that they have necks and im im fumin ok i HATE it i hate it i have been betrayed and i will NEVER FORGET ABOUT IT UGHGHGHG I HATE THESE CUNTS -10000000000000000000000000000000000/10 die

hhhhh i just dont like em. theyre too annoying to be cute now. and whats gonna happen if i squeeze one? is like. water gonna come out? r they just gonna deflate? 4/10 tentacles are not hyrules forte it seems ://

trust kohga to send the twinks out on the front line. seriously. they’re not bad tho? kinda small and underwhelming :((( tho i give extra points for the good crazy laugh we love a good manic cackle 6/10 they dont really count as monsters but ah well where else am i gonna put em

now THATS what im talkin about babeyyyyy we love the muscles,,,,, the posture,,, the stride,,, we love it when u fuck up stealth and a torrential downpour of these motherfuckers come down to beat ur ass,,,,, 9/10 its raining men 😎

u know. u dont rlly like. get a good view of these guys when ur balls deep in a battle with them, but the more i get like closer looks at them the more i go ???? like idk. everything about them looks backwards and wrong. but as far as backwards and wrong goes its not a bad look and the boss theme is a banger so 4/10 maybe dont jump on my ass every time i step one foot onto the desert :/

i just. i dont dig it. idk why. aside from the fact they’re a monumental pain in my ass, and now everytime i hear a beep even slightly resembling a guardian i shit my pants, but. idk??? as far as robots go its not like. terrible. they’re like the milfs of robots. the milves, if u will. a rilf. except i wouldnt. so its more like riwlf. but even that leaves too much up to interpretation so im just gonna call em a cunt and go. 4/10 leg game strong

here we are,,, the big boys,,,, waterblight isnt too bad i will admit, but the spear hand is both annoying and mildly inconvenient. its got a rlly big chest but rlly thin arms?? also not sure how i feel abt the strap on beard but oh well its not like ganons got taste. 5/10 kind of average for a blight i think

a hefty motherfucker. a chunk of a lad. big large. the fact this is like one of the easiest blights makes it more forgiveable to me but like whatever its got going on with the 80s hair needs 2 be sorted out. i like its moves but it doesnt hang upside down like waterblight :((( 5/10 calm down kate bush

ok who doesnt like gun arms. and a gun back. this things like fuckin megatron. the whole face plate thing doesnt look bad either. honestly its kind of a look? but its dickheadery in aoc makes me wanna set shit on fire so :// 6/10 hot but will not leave u alone 😔

ok this one is by FAR the sexiest of all the blights. i just cant explain it. i like guys with bad posture. i had an easy time beating it but apparently its given other people a lot of grief and that makes it 10x more sexy to me lmaooo. also it can clone itself which is like. thats a win. 8/10 ganon spilt all the sexy juice into this one

ok i didnt realise how many arms this motherfucker has and the whole hairline behind the ears thing is not a great look. especially w the beard. in fact the longer i look at it the less sexy it becomes tbh. 3/10 they tried to make arachnophobia sexy and it didnt work

10/10 i will be taking questions in my inbox but i wont be taking constructive criticism and you cant make me 

Wanna Watch?

YangyangxReader

Word Count: 3.2k

Summary/Warning: Smut. Yangyang swears that tentacles are hot, just watch one video with him and you’ll see. He promises.… this was supposed to be a blurb but then I got very carried away. and because of that it might be a little rambley at some parts im so sorry

Requested

You’d be the first to admit that you and Yangyang had a weird friendship. Your other friends had clocked it, saying that even for best friends, you were way too open with each other.

And they weren’t technically wrong. Something about being around Yangyang deleted your filter, made you say shit that you never thought you’d say to another human being, but in your defense, he was exactly the same way.

It started with a few dirty jokes. It wasn’t anything serious or any different than ones you’d say with or without each other, but you two did encourage each other. It was as if anything one of you said, the other had something to add. It didn’t take long for things to begin to spiral and for your friends to decide that you two together were lethal.

After that day it was like you were attached at the hip. Something about your shared vulgarness made you click and it wasn’t very long after until it went a little far.

It was the first time you stayed over at his place, a bottle of liquor tucked in your bag. Tipsy off a half a bottle each, you both let it slip what turned you on the most. It wasn’t weird at the time, but the next morning there was a tension there.

That tension eventually faded, leading to another sleep over. And another. And another. Each of them somehow leading to some form of sexual conversation.

But the one that happened tonight was different.

Some joke about porn was made. You two sat side by side in your own chairs as you watched him play some game you quickly forgot the name of, and he had deemed it appropriate to mention that it would be kinda hot if the woman he played as were to get fucked by the tentacle monster that she fought.

You started by jokingly scolding him about how, though you weren’t sure exactly in what way, what he said was chauvinistic. But then you followed it with teasing about how he was a weirdo for being into tentacles.

“Oh come on,” he goes on, much louder than he needed to be, “you cannot tell me you’ve never looked at tentacle porn. Not even just because you were curious?”

“What porn I watch is none of your business Yang,” you retort as you push your finger in his face, a bratty giggle bursting from you when he smacks your hand away in irritation.

“So you’re not denying that you’ve seen tentacle porn,” he hums, nodding to himself, “if that’s the case I’m just gonna assume you have.”

You move to retort again, but he quickly interrupts, “actually I’m going to assume that you only watch tentacle porn and it’s something you get off to very often.”

“You think about me getting off a lot Yangyang?” you ask, but you quickly realize maybe the question was a step too far once the words are in the air.

Thankfully, he seems to ignore your question as he suddenly closed his game, the incognito tab he opens immediately after making your mouth run dry.

“How about this,” he starts, his fingers running across the keyboard as he types in the the link to a porn site. You divert your eyes quickly when you see the bars auto fill pop up, the idea of seeing whatever he looked at when he forgot to go incognito making your stomach flip, “let’s just take a little peek and we’ll see who’s right.”

“See who’s right about what?” your voice pitches and your back straightens as you ask.

“About whether or not tentacles are hot,” he turns to you briefly as if he’s explaining a math equation to you, “come on dude keep up.”

“Man I don’t know,” you hesitate, but you quickly notice he already has a video picked out and queued.

“I’m not gonna force you to watch it if you don’t want,” he reassures as he hovers his cursor over the play button, “but I also won’t judge you if you’re curious.”

You gnaw on your bottom lip for a moment as you think, your heart beating faster as the seconds pass, “okay fine just play it before I change my mind.”

And that’s how you got where you are now. You and Yangyang curled into your chairs, eyes wide and curious as a slender woman, with a disproportionately large chest, screams and whines while she’s brutally fucked by a weird tentacle monster.

You feel your face twist in fascination, first at the amount of detail and time that must have went into animating each frame, but then slowly but surely, just how weirdly hot you found yourself finding the video.

Something about the way the multiple tentacles cover her body as they suspend her in the air. One is shoved deep in her mouth, gross gagging noises added as a result, two attached to both of her nipples and another set fucking her open from both holes. It was easily one of the weirdest things you’ve ever seen, but you couldn’t ignore the growing wetness it caused in your underwear.

You try to not let it show in your body language, the idea of Yangyang noticing your arousal and then most likely making fun of you for it making you want to crawl in a hole.

You eyes dart over to him for a moment to try and gauge how he’s feeling. The first thing you notice immediately is the way he curls to block your view of his crotch, the second being the fact that he looks at you as well.

“So… what are you thinking?” he asks slowly.

“I don’t know what are you thinking?” you throw back almost too quickly.

“I… I think you know what I’m thinking,” his words continue to spill out like molasses, his head quickly nodding to the space between his legs with a embarrassed flush to his skin, “I’m asking how you’re feeling.”

“I don’t know,” you double down, your head shaking with a jerk, “I- I don’t know how I’m feeling.”

“It’s okay if you like it-“

“I don’t know if I like it,” you lie, your tone defensive and sharp.

“You do know that you’re not a bad person for liking it right?” He continues to reassure as he tries to keep his patience with you.

You only huff in response, the video still loudly playing as you talk. You try to shift in your seat to create distance between you, but it only makes you aware of how your arousal grows.

“Okay im not gonna lie,” he starts, a joking tone to his voice in the way that tells you he’s trying to ease the tension, “I think it’s hot, but you probably guessed that. I’m just saying I could totallly jack it to this.”

You know it’s a joke, but that doesn’t stop the words from making your face warm and your thighs flex. And even though you try and advert your eyes, you know he is analyzing every move you make.

“Do you maybe…” he trails off as he considers what to say next, “ack, no no it’s weird never mind.”

“What?” you dart up in panic, “is something im doing weird?”

“No no no,” he panics as well, “you’re fine… I was just gonna ask if you... if you maybe wanted to see how much you like it. Like see if you can get off to it?”

It was in this you found out that maybe your friends were right. Maybe you were lethal together, too comfortable and relaxed and willing to do and say the worst in front of each other. If that wasn’t the case there was no way in hell you’d end up where you were now.

If someone had told you that when you first met Yangyang that one night you two would be masturbating to tentacle porn together, you would have told them they lived in a fantasy, that they were just delusional perverts that don’t like people being just friends, but they would have been right.

You felt weirdly eager as you pushed your pajama shorts and underwear to his floor, the air of the room hitting your skin and making you come to the terms of how wet the video had gotten you.

And the fact that Yangyang seemed equally as eager as he pulled himself from the restrains of his sweatpants both put you at ease while putting you incredibly in edge.

You tried to ignore him as he sat next to you. Your eyes taking an iron lock onto his screen as a new video played. It was the same idea, pretty girl with literally any possible hole stuffed with a slimy tentacle getting pleasured in any way possible, the only difference was a slight change in art style.

It took you a moment to get into it, your fingers gently tapping against your clit as you tried to build the courage to touch yourself the same way you do in the safety of your own room, but after one particularly hard thrust from the monster and a desperate cry from the girl, you couldn’t hold back.

Your fingers dipped into your entrance gently as you coated the tips in your arousal, your hips jumping slightly at the friction.

Yangyang tried to ignore you as well, his fist moving slowly as he tried to focus on the scene in front of him, but the way you jerked next to him and the bubbles of noise that slipped unintentionally from your lips, he felt like a starving tiger being tempted with a steak.

You tried to bite your tongue to hold in any moans as your fingers started to roll circles gently on your clit, but with the way you grew wetter and wetter and the rising sensitivity in the bundle of nerves, you couldn’t help the quiet whimpering that rose from you chest.

It wasn’t that you could get off to it, it was actually much easier than you had anticipated. Something about the way the girls in the videos were being stimulated in every way possible had you hot and dripping in your arousal, and maybe your best friend pleasuring himself next to you was making it a million times sexier.

You weren’t alone though. It didn’t take long for Yangyang to lose his internal battle, his eyes straining to his side and his gaming chair rolling back slightly to allow him to watch you from the side. He knew he could crank one out easily to the videos in front of him, he had done it plenty of times before, but if he let the opportunity of watching your chest rise and fall with labored breaths while your fingers moved quickly over your dampened skin pass him by, he’d be kicking himself forever.

He was moving before he could even think, the finger of his free hand working with a mind of his own as they tap gently on the side of your chair. His heart beat sky rockets when you jump, but he only feels himself get harder when he sees it doesn’t stop your rapidly moving hand.

“Say no,” he whispers regardless of his growing need to touch you, “say no cause I cannot ruin this friendship.”

“No offense Yang,” he almost collapses at how winded you sound, but also at the promise that you’re still comfortable enough to shorten his name, “but if what we’re doing now didn’t ruin it, I don’t think anything will.”

“Thank fuck,” he speaks too loudly again as he moves his chair next to yours, his hand brushing against the side of your bare leg as it leans against the arm of your chair, “cause I wanna touch you so bad dude.”

“Hmmmm,” you hum out as his words swirl your brain like a blender, your heart rapidly pumping against your chest. You’d be a liar if you tried to act like the idea didn’t cause a new wave of arousal run over your body. Your answer comes before you can even think of the consequences.

“Please,” the word being your only verbal response before you rip your hand away from your body, your legs falling wider apart as an invitation. Your body jumps in protest as you deny yourself the orgasm that was slowly building, and Yangyang immediately jumps into action to compensate.

The first touch of his fingers is unsure, a hesitation in his muscles as he tries to convince himself that what’s happening is real. He isn’t sure what’s hotter to him in that moment, the way you whimper with a slight pout to your lips when he finally presses his digits to your swollen clit, or the way your eyes remain locked on the animated porn.

He’s battling between the two, when you show him something better. Your hand moves wildly in the air for only a moment, before you're pushing it under his arm. It doesn’t take you much exploring before you find where his hand slowly moves against his length. Your hand swats gently at his in a way that weirdly reminds him of the way you swat at him when he does something he’s not supposed to, and after his brain catches up with your motions, he lets go.

He thinks his heart probably stops when your hand wraps around him, your wrist immediately moving at the same pace as his fingers. His eyes slam shut for a second, a desperate attempt to hold off his orgasm, before they open slightly again.

He tries to do the same as you and keep his eyes trained on the video, and it works a few times, but as you gush and twitch against his unrelentingly moving fingers. He feels like one of his biggest fantasies has come to life in front of him, the whining sound of his name from your lips music to his ears.

You babble and squirm, your orgasm approaching you much faster than it has ever before. There’s something so jarring and new about the video that flashes in front of your eyes, and combining that with your best friend playing you not much differently than he’d played his game not long before made you feel like you were losing your grip on reality.

You’re vaguely aware that your hand flexes around his length, and fear that maybe your hold may be too rough immediately leaving your mind when you hear him let out a pleased groan. The sound also momentarily replaces the fear that filled you from actually looking at the boy that sits next to you, and you feel your head jerking to look at his face scrunched in pleasure.

The wind is knocked from your lungs when your eyes meet his again, neither of your stares faltering like you assumed they would. Instead the eye contact encourages you both, and you feel your hands pick up their pace.

You thank the universe for Yangyang’s reflexes as he finds no trouble in following your antsy jerking hips, his fingers never shifting away from your buzzing clit. He’s also completely unfazed as your thighs clamp around his wrist, and instead his now free hand moves to grab at your knee that’s closest to him, and pull harshly to hold your legs spread.

The angle his body is now turned leaves him leaning on his side, and he shows no hesitation to using the new position to his advantage as he begins thrusting his hips to fuck your fist.

You feel as if there’s another force around you that forces you to stare at one another, your hands and hips becoming frantic as you both inch closer and closer to your finish.

The video had ended moments before, but neither of you move to choose another. Too distracted by the other bodies, both of your breaths pick up right before the point of hyperventilating.

You feel yourself right on the edge, the beginning of your orgasm making your toes curl and your back arch off the back of the chair. Just from the stimulation on your clit, you can feel yourself falling, but when he notices that you’re starting to crumble, his fingers slip down until they push into you making you gasp loudly.

With his middle and ring finger pistoning in you at the same pace as his hips and the heel of his hand digging and rubbing into your clit, you finally start to come. If it wasn’t for his determined pace, your fluttering walls would push him out, but he fights against your body with a deep grunt as he curls the digits to pull against the nerve inside you that makes your eyes roll back into your skull.

With your mouth hanging open, silent moans and squeaking whimpers popping from your throat, he’s sure he stares at a defiled angel. He knew he always found you attractive, even more attractive when you first took his raunchy jokes in stride, but as you come so beautifully around his fingers, he decides you’re the prettiest thing he’s ever seen.

Just watching your come is enough to push him over the edge, but as it makes your muscles tense, your hand flexes and shakes as you hold him. With a few more pulses of his hips, he’s coming with his lip tucked between his teeth and his eyes trained on where you wrap around his fingers, your noise of surprise at the feeling of his come shooting across your hand only making his orgasm stronger.

With shaking legs, he falls back into his chair, his hand pulling from your sensitive skin, and his softening length slipping from your fingers.

Silence falls over the room, the only sound being the angry sound of his computer's fan and your evening breaths. You pull your limbs into your body as you try to get more comfortable in the seat, and as you try to wrap your arms around yourself, you notice the evidence of his orgasm that sticks to the side of your hand.

You’re moving before you can even think about your actions or how weird they could be to the boy next to you, your hand lifting up to your face and you tongue peaking out to lick at the sticky substance. You jerk slightly at the taste, but in a thought of self challenge and a simple ‘fuck it,’ you slide the flat of your tongue up the side of your hand, collecting everything he left behind, before swallowing deeply.

You hear a muffled sound of surprise to your side, the sound making your head whip to the side as you remembered your possible audience. Your heart beats fast as you panic at the idea of him finding your action gross, but as you look you see him in a very similar position.

Yangyang grins around his fingers that were once drenched in your orgasm, but now sit licked clean in his teasing mouth. There’s a slight popping noise as he pulls them hesitantly from his lips, and his devious smile only grows before he speaks.

“Oh so we’re both like gross, gross huh?”

OKAY BUT IF YOURE UP FOR IT??

Reader comforting Boba after he escaped and is healing from the Sarlaac pit?? Maybe some sweet soft smut of them assuring him that he's still worthy and loveable and handsome as hell??

I love this request so much!! So I made it a random sequel to Hard to Kill!! 

Body worshipping Boba Fett Random sequel to Hard to Kill 

Part one       Part two

Warnings: Low self-esteem, panic attacks, PTSD, talk of old injuries, Boba needs therapy, Gender neutral reader, body worshipping, slow smut, oral(Male receiving) cum swallowing, fluff, angst, cry and be horny at the same time with this fic!! 

It had been around two years since Boba escaped the Sarlacc buck ass nude. Leaving his armor, trophies, and pride behind. He had been in her gut for two days, narrowly escaping with his life. He had been dizzy and dilousinal when he had gotten free, crawling onto the night chilled sand. The weak acid of the Sarlacc wounded his body terribly. 

His nasty burns were now nastier scars. His left arm has scars from the surgery he had to repair the broken bone. His right leg always bugged him now, because it was a mangled mess of cracked bone, ripped muscles, and ripped tendons from where the Sarlacc tried to rip it off. The many surgeries on his legs helped, but the leg still bothers Boba often.  

As you helped him heal, nursing him back to health, he told you what happened within the beast. How she trapped souls that would talk to him constantly, how tentacles on the walls of her gut held him still, and how she injected neurotoxin into him to keep him still. Clearly Boba had been scarred mentally and physically from the beast.

You were taking a nap in the cockpit when you heard cursing in Mando’a coming from the cargo hold of Slave I. You blinked and quickly rushed down the ladder to the hold. Boba was sitting against the wall, rubbing his hand clearly in pain. 

“What’s the matter?” You walked over slowly, when Boba was pissed off he was not to be messed with. “My nerves in my left hand, they made my hand lock up while I was repairing the first cell door. I broke it even more.” The frustration is very clear in his voice, something else boiling under the service of his facade. 

You looked at the smoking door, tools scattered about. In his anger he clearly threw a few tools around. Boba rarely lost his cool, so something must be really bothering him. You sighed softly, looking at the glaring Mandalorian. 

You sat down beside him, gently taking his scarred hand in yours. You rubbed his hand slowly, Boba glaring at the floor. “It’s alright Boba, you can’t help-” Boba cuts you off, “None of this should’ve happened. I tried to tell jabba not to try to kill that fucking Jedi!! The stupid Hutt being ignorant ruined my life.” Boba raised his voice, standing up.

“Boba-” He cut you off again, “Don’t Boba me. That stupid monster ruined my body! I am scarred and some of my nerves are damaged! I have to shave my head because the acid that somehow touched my hair causes it not to grow anymore! I-” You stood up, pulling Boba into a tight hug. He hardly ever raised his voice, talking too much hurt his throat. Yelling hurt even more. 

You shushed him, rubbing his back slowly. He trembled slightly, clearly going into a PTSD driven panic attack. “It’s okay cyar’ika.” You whispered, pressing a kiss to his temple. Boba buried his face into your neck, hugging you back tightly.

Boba struggled everyday with trauma from the Sarlacc, mainly his self image. He lost his armor and the trophies he wore on it, which took a big part of his soul. The armor was his fathers, who he lost once again. But this time in the bowels of the Sarlacc. 

Boba had always hated mirrors, not recognizing how handsome he was due to a dread and a deep hatred. Now he hardly even looked in the mirror, hating the scars that now covered his body. He limped almost constantly, his right leg hurting more and more every day. 

Boba hated himself more than he ever had before, and it broke your heart. 

“Boba you were never ugly.” You step back cupping his cheek, his dark eyes bright with pain and hate. “You’re just as handsome as you were when I met you.” You stroke his cheekbones, a soft smile on your face. Boba looks at you, a hard look still on his face. 

You continue to stroke his back, whispering sweet nothings and compliments. He eventually relaxes in your arms, sighing loudly. “How about we fix the cell together?” You speak softly like he’s an injured and spooked animal. You stroke his hand gently, smiling when he nods and mumbles out an “ok…”

~A few hours later~ 

You sat on the bed beside Boba, tracing his arm scars softly. It took you both a while to fix the door, but you eventually got it done. “Your scars don’t make you any less of a man Boba.” You spoke suddenly. Boba looked at you, a glare on his face. 

Before your lover could open his mouth to argue you spoke, “It makes you stronger. Your scars tell a story of your survival. You shouldn’t have survived that monster, but yet you did. You nearly died from shock and the nasty wounds. You nearly lost your leg.” You softly cup his cheek, “You survived because you’re Boba Fett, a goddamn Mandalorian. You’re tough and beyond brave, not to mention stubborn.” 

Boba frowned at your words, his dark eyes looking away from yours. “Boba these scars show how fucking tough you are. They prove how incredible you are.” You press a kiss to his scarred wrist. “But I-” You shut him up with a kiss, your lips molding perfectly with his. 

“Boba you’re still hot as hell.” You mumble against his lips, “Actually more so! These scars do things to me.” You kiss him again, Boba kissing you back. “You deserve all the love in the universe Boba, you’re worthy and deserving of happiness.” You whisper. 

Boba looked into your eyes, the sadness in them breaking your heart. “Do you really think I deserve-” You cut him off again, “Boba you deserve the universe and so much more.” He clearly still didn’t believe you, but you knew just how to persuade him. 

You kiss him again, putting all of your love and passion behind the kiss. You helped Boba undress, moving slowly. Once he was naked, you undressed as well. You kissed him again, your hands holding his and giving them a gentle squeeze. 

Boba let you push him onto his back, allowing you to crawl on top of him. You kissed his scarred neck and chest, “Let me show you just how hot you are.” Boba only nodded, still looking unsure. You squeezed his right hand before letting go, using your hands to trace his body instead. 

Boba was relaxed under you, his cock half hard from your teasing kisses. “These scars just make you even sexier to me Boba.” You spoke seductively, your lips tracing a nasty scar on his left pectoral. Boba looked into your eyes, his eyes growing dark with desire. 

You moved slowly, tracing each scar on his sexy body with your lips and tongue. He was covered in scars. So by the time you got to his hard cock he was letting out soft moans, his cock dripping precum. 

Boba let out an irritated sigh when you kissed everywhere but his cock, your lips tracing the scars on his thighs. You smirked to yourself, your grumpy man was coming back. In the Sarlacc Boba kept his genitals covered as long as possible, so luckily his large cock still worked. 

Boba growled out your name, the noise sending lighting bolts of pleasure to your core. You smirked and licked the precum from his head, Boba groaning loudly. “Just look at you. My handsome Boba Fett, all needy for me.” You purred out the words, which made Boba glare at you. 

You held back your laughs as you licked his cock from the base to the head, Boba gripping the bed sheets. He was always the most sensitive when you moved slow like this. You traced your tongue along every bit of his large cock, Boba using all of his willpower to not to buck his hips.  

When you finally put the head into your mouth Boba let out a relieved moan, the noise causing you to get even more excited. You held him at the base, your mouth working over him slowly. Boba bucked his hips, a small whine leaving him at your slow movements. 

You held his hips down, Boba glaring even more at you. You got back to work quickly, taking Boba as far into your mouth as you could. Your hand covered what your throat couldn’t handle. You moaned around him, your tongue swirling around his thick shaft. 

His precum was salty and a little bitter, but it still tasted good enough to you. Boba watched you suck his cock, your throat taking him like a champ. Boba twitched in your mouth, clenching his jaw as he approached his orgasm. 

You pulled back, giving a few teasing kitten licks to his dripping head. He growled out your name, a warning. You smirked and took him back down your throat, your hand and mouth working in a perfect rhythm 

It didn’t take much more for Boba to cum down your throat, the taste of his warm seed making you shiver. You licked his head a few more times after he finished, watching as he relaxed under you. 

You wiped the drool and drops cum from your mouth and kissed your way back up his body. You kissed Boba’s lips deeply, putting all of your love and adoration for him in the kiss. “Do you believe me now?” You questioned, a frown on your lips.

“I suppose….” Your frown turned into a wide grin and you hugged Boba tightly. “Good!!! I love you so much!” Boba smiled, hugging you back. “I love you too, Cyar’ika.” 

Boba Fett still had his moments here and there, but he definitely hated himself a little less thanks to you. 

Tags: @leias-left-hair-bun @iamassbuttkingofhell @catsnkooks @colorfulloverbatturkey @ahsokatano-thetogruta @jedi-mando @peacefulwizardfox @hounding-around @julyzaa @feathersforcloes @chr0nicbackpain @strangebroadwaykinks @jedi-nila-rhyn @valkyrieofthehighfae @my-awakened-ghost @commanderrivercc-3628 @anstarwar

D&D Quotes Without Context

Ravenloft Edition, Dementlieu Arc, part 8

OOC: Gorbash line of thought: "This fucker isn't wearing yellow, I CAN TAKE HIS ASS!" OOC: Now, how much MST refs can we cram into this session... “You worship the hell lord of small dick energy, your opinion is meaningless.” "St. Joel, watch over these viewers, that they may keep their sanity with us as their friends." "We've got you, Movie Sign of Evil!" "All this world's a stage... and we are merely slayers." "Blood for the hanged king. Blood for the hanged king. Deep hurting. DEEEP HURTING." "Sorry, my blood is too rich for his taste. All those sweets I eat." You see Gorbash go slack for a minute, then you hear him begin to mutter something, as he turns around, his eyes red with madness. "Blood for the hanged king." Irost: "I know this is bad for us... but for a play? This is kind of an interesting twist." Jonni: “Shut up, New Eddie.” OOC: WHY DO I KEEP GETTING 8'S? "GAH! Like fingernails on a chalkboard... In my brain!" Your minds are assaulted by visions of sandstorms, rock climbing, long driving scenes. COLEMAN FRANCIS. "No springs!" Marshal cries out with a maniacal titter. OOC: Or you can just wait while Marshal tanks it like a true pimp. "I AM THE HANGED KING. AND YOU WILL OBEY." “Yeah? I’m Jonni Humantorch and I’m sexier, badder and harder than you. Fuck off, ghost.” Marshal: "Each man is a god! Each man is FREE!" Irost: "That's right! You tell that bag man!" Hanged king earns a dollar, you earn a dime, so you counterspell on company time. Jonni smiles. “Not today, raggedy Satan!” "Who needs to be favored by the Gods when you're favored by Jonni?" "And now I'm back normal speed, that was close, almost ruined my sugar rush." So, Marshal's whaling away like a temp with golf clubs. GM OOC: You are restrained, you can't speak, and you are suffocating. OOC: Warforged, not suffocating. GM OOC: Right. So its mainly just mildly inconvenient. GM: The Hanged King tilts his head, he was clearly expecting you to be dying. Irost: "How is he supposed to quote really awesome funny gibberish when he's being a boss!" Gorbash: "What's the matter, not so tough without your corpse collection?" OOC: Marshall is a brick shit house of metal on metal. OOC: My Bromance will protect me. OOC2: Your bromance is gonna flatten you. You see Emil standing beside the projector, "This is for my face you blue raspberry flavored son of a hoor [sic]." Marshal: "I cast gun!" As we clear out, Marshal reaches back inside to save Gorbash's NIZE HAT. "EVERYBODY OUT OF THE BURNING UNIVERSE!" "Moving pictures will never take off, take my word for it." Jonni Eldritch blasts the shit out of it. GM: It remains unharmed. Jonni Eldritch shits the blast out of it. [sic] Marshal joins her, casting a ritual in the name of M'y'kNelson, Destroyer of Worlds. GM: Fortunato's follies is a comedy of errors about a clown, the titular Fortunato, who follows around a girl he loves trying to ask for her hand in marriage, but continually getting blocked by increasingly zany and implausible happenstance. It's basically an hour and a half of a looney tunes cartoon. OOC: It makes you weep, it makes you laugh, it makes you reflect on the humanity of the world! "I keep forgetting how creepy it is when we're capable of grinning." Jonni’s eyes never leave him, nor does her “I’m gonna spit roast you with Evard’s black tentacles” smirk. Nyx: "Calix, I see that smirk. Please stop it. You are irritating Jonni, I'm one of the people who has to deal with her when she is irritated. I'm a trained alchemist, rogue, and tinker, I know multiple ways to leave you disabled, unable to talk, but still alive as Warforged are. So I say again, please stop it." Jonni: “And she’s the nice one.” GM: Plus you only got a bit buzzed so you could go watch Fortunato's follies. Which was a big hit: Irost killed it. Irost: The stage dynamite was the key. Gorbash: "Okay we have enough invites to get us into this Ball. Time to plan what we do once we're in." Irost: "Hobnob and rub elbows with the fanciest people in the realm--" Jonni: "Arson." GM: "We know that. We need a key to get to the box, and we know the duchess has the key. So we need to get Calix and the key." Jonni: “I have a plan.” GM: "Is the plan arson?" Jonni: “Vesh and I get the key from the duchess under cover of threesome and the rest of you hold Calix down while Nyx takes off his arms and legs.” Marshal: "No silverface." "We're like... a Matryoshka Doll of distractions." "No offense, you don't strike me as the stealthy type." Marshal: "No, but I am the distraction who has manners." “Fair point.”

Jonni: “Wasn’t Gonna hurt anyone. Just need a wand of grease.” OOC: I DON'T CARE IF JONNI COME CRAWLING IN YOUR WINDOW STARK NAKED WITH A BIG OL' KNIFE! DON'T YOU GIVE NO MATCHES TO JONNI!!! OOC: No one ever goes with Operation: Nekkid Slip and Slide. OOC: And then... then he frost-blocked me! OOC: Rule of thumb: Don't shit talk the eldritch horror to his face. That tends to piss them off.

Some musings on symbiote morphology (AKA when size does matter)

So, back when Venom was still in cinemas, I saw it with a friend who (like me) enjoyed it mightily -- though said friend did roll her eyes pretty hard at the She-Venom scene, because of course the female!Venom has to be skinny and sexy. Of course she does.

I mean, the sexual dimorphism on display here is, uh... pretty extreme.

Usually, this would’ve gotten to me too. Few issues in genre film stick in my craw like the double standards applied to male and female bodies (ask me my thoughts on the likes of Wonder Woman or Gamora at your peril). So it was a little surprising to find that this was one I was mostly willing to shrug off.

Why? Well, that requires a bit of backing up and some more context. But mostly, it’s the perfect jumping-off point for a whole lot of rambling about visual shorthands and how symbiote morphology has been handled in the comics over the years, which apparently I had a whole essay’s worth of thoughts on. So here we go.

Now, Comic!Venom =/= Movie!Venom. They aren’t the same character, don’t have the same history, and their biology doesn’t follow the same rules.  But one is still the basis for the other, so we’re going to start waayyy back at the beginning.

Since the symbiote's introduction back in '84, precious little about the species has remained consistent through the many writers and retcons, but one detail that Marvel was -- mostly -- consistent on back in the early days is that the shape a symbiote takes depends a lot on the body of its host. So when Spider-man was wearing the symbiote the result was (by design) literally just Spider-man-but-in-black:

But Venom's next host did not have the muscularly-lean body of Peter Parker, he had the jacked-up muscle-mountain that was Eddie Brock’s -- and the result is the Venom we all know and love.

Whereas when completely-normal-human-woman Anne Weying first bonds with the Venom symbiote in Sinner Takes All, we get a much slimmer She-Venom.

You can see the same trends at work with the Life Foundation Five and various other examples. So, in the comics at least, there’s some internal consistency explaining why He-Venom and She-Venom should look so very different. (Why Eddie and Anne should be such wildly different sized humans is a whoooole other topic, but best left in the Don’t Get Me Started pile for now.)

Of course, when the guy you've cast as Eddie has the physique of Tom Hardy rather than, say, He-Man, the logic of why Venom looks so huge falls apart. 

  ⬥ Venom and She-Venom, actual size comparison.

While comic book writers of the 80's may have been able to convince a generation of fans not to question why a professional journalist would be jacked enough to dwarf Captain America, film adds a layer of realism and audience expectations that would make that a much harder sell (not to mention limiting your casting options to a much smaller pool). Casting Tom Hardy was inarguably the right call. 

If Eddie no longer looked like Venom, the other solution would have been to make Venom look more like Tom Hardy--but good luck getting that past the existing fanbase. When it comes to pleasing the longtime fans, it's safe to say that Venom, not Eddie, is the character who has to look the part. Plus, Venom is entirely CG, so casting and realism no longer have to matter. Fanboys can have their giant Venom and tiny She-Venom, and the fangirls can have Tom Hardy getting all prettily roughed up. There are worse solutions.

Don't get me wrong: they could and absolutely should have evened up the difference on screen by giving She-Venom some extra body mass (she is on screen for like ten seconds, the fanboys can effing deal). But when the key decision that fucked up those ratios is making Eddie so much slimmer and sexier than he was originally supposed to be, I am unusually willing to give them a tentative pass. I mean, I love comics!Eddie too, but I can’t see him working on screen.

While I’m talking symbiote-bodies, it’s worth going into some of the other reasons to make Eddie+symbiote so huge, the obvious ones being to a) make him more threatening, and b) emphasise that Eddie's bonded with the symbiote in a way Peter never did. As a shape-shifter, Venom can make his host look bigger but not smaller (which is presumably why Rad Eddie may look younger than regular!Eddie, but is still suspiciously large for a skateboarder hanging with teens).

But size isn't the only way to make a character like Venom threatening. Compare Carnage, who is much more dangerous than Venom -- but (along with his host) fairly consistently drawn as smaller and leaner than the original.

He's still plenty threatening, though -- not because he's huge, but because he's completely bugfuck nuts and into murder for recreation. His design gets this across with a texture less like skin than a mass of veins and tentacles. Size is a good visual shorthand for danger, but it's not the only shorthand that works for symbiotes of the 90′s heyday.

You can see the same logic at work in Toxin too (a lesser-known and sadly mistreated Carnage-spawn from the early 00's). Precious little about Toxin's look remained consistent from one creative team to the next, but the impact of the host body is still there. His first host, Pat Mulligan, was a pretty average-sized dude, which is reflected in his bonded form (left), but when Eddie gets the Toxin symbiote later on, we get a much bigger Toxin (right). And Eddie's Toxin has more tentacles and rougher skin, so we know he's not going to be friendly (Eddie was really not in a good place at this point in his history).

Perhaps the most interesting example is Agent Venom, who turns up when the military bonds the Venom symbiote to Flash Thompson: disabled vet and card-carrying Spidey fan. His Venom-look is a brilliant bit of storytelling-through-design: the face and overall build hearkens back to Spider-man's time in the symbiote, the equipment signposts his military connections (past and present), and black will always be the signifier of a guy working black ops.

Perhaps most important, there's no mouth (compare both Spidey and Toxin #1), which is our sign that the symbiote's under control -- drugged into submission by the military, in fact.

But key to Flash's time in the role is that the Venom symbiote doesn't always stay drugged and docile, and whenever it starts to break free, Agent Venom morphs into Venom's traditional look -- gaping mouth, no belts or shoulder pads, and lots of bulky muscles a la the original flavour Eddie Brock (you can see him mid-transformation on the left below).

Does that make sense, when Flash is the host? Probably not, but comic book logic, as usual, is suspended for the sake of visual shorthand: fans know what Venom is "supposed" to look like, so that's what he looks like when the comic wants to telegraph that Flash is losing control. And that, I suspect, is why Lee Price's Venom (above right) looks more like Eddie's, even though Lee Price looks more like Flash. Price may be the one in charge, but he’s also a madman, so his Venom has to look out of control. The comics have officially hit Tom Hardy territory: Venom is huge now because people have come to expect Venom to look like the original Eddie-Brock!Venom, regardless of who’s inside.

There are bigger exceptions to the rule, however -- two of the more interesting turned up almost simultaneously in 2015, when both Venom!Flash and Toxin!Eddie got significant redesigns in the pages of Venom: Space Knight and Carnage (2015). Now Flash's Venom is the bulky muscular one, while Eddie's Toxin looks slimmer than Eddie has ever been before or since. What's going on here? Did the artists just screw up?

Well, not entirely -- the characters haven't just flipped looks, they've flipped roles. Now Toxin's the one being drugged into submission by a US agency (and we can only assume those drugs somehow prompt a symbiote to produce pouches, because we're two-for-two on that front). Meanwhile, Venom's been "purged of corruption" and has finally bonded with Flash as a full partner, which may be why they opted for something closer to his original look. Note that Venom has no mouth, and Toxin's is positively restrained by symbiote standards, which tells you a lot about the temperament we can expect from both of them.

That said, I don't think either design really works. Venom's new look is a real step back in creativity from his Agent Venom days, and the helmet-face would be better suited to a mech design than a symbiote who's being treated as a real character for the first time. Meanwhile, Toxin’s look doesn't really work for Eddie, for all the same reasons it did work for Flash: Eddie isn't a trusted agent in this scenario, he's more like an intelligent animal on a short leash. It isn't just the builds that are wrong -- none of the story comes across well in these designs.

All in all, the longer Venom’s been around, the less the standard host=symbiote rules seem to apply. Venom is huge because his look is sufficiently iconic that that’s what the fans expect, regardless of who’s on the inside, or whether we’ve just rewritten his entire backstory and made the jump to film.

Speaking of which, it’s worth pointing out that there is actually precedent in the comics for female symbiotes who aren't drawn like a bikini model in a layer of black body paint. One is Patricia Robertson, who bonds with the "Venom" symbiote (read: not actually the Venom symbiote) in the 2003 Venom series.

Though Trish is a woman of fairly average build, her "Venom" is virtually indistinguishable from Eddie's (too much so, if anything -- it's very hard to tell which is which when they clash). Unfortunately, the 2003 series is otherwise an ugly, incomprehensible mess of a comic, containing almost nothing that has ever been referenced again. I can really only recommend it to absolute completists.

Somewhat better handled is Tarna, a skrull Agent of the Cosmos who appears in Venom: Space Knight. Tarna's symbiotic look is not remotely feminine, and one suspects that's the point: it's ugly, threatening, and gives no clue as to who's inside. (Her symbiote can also separate from her while maintaining form, making the comparison pic unusually easy for me).

But as a shapeshifting alien bonded to a shapeshifting symbiote, Tarna perhaps doesn't make the best example for general principles. It’s worth keeping in mind that every design has a storytelling function too: Patricia’s Venom needs to be mistakable for the original Venom for plot reasons, and the reveal that Tarna is a humanoid woman under her symbiote is set up as a surprise. But the creators of the film wanted us to know that was Anne under the symbiote from the moment she appeared, so sexy!She-Venom it is.

All that said, at the very end of the day, I’d much rather not have to make these excuses for the film. I’d much rather see more Tarnas and fewer She-Venom’s, and both film and comics have a long way to go before we get there yet.

Because I mentioned I was going to eventually get rid of my old shower curtain, my mom surprised me and got me an Edward Gorey one. Gashlycrumb Tinies! 

One of the recent ghost books on ghost I read mostly just (intentionally or not) taught me how to fake spooky sh*t at seances but in the entry on mirrors it mentioned looking into one at night was considered bad luck. But that’s kind of hard to avoid. I already knew using candlelight to look into a mirror is considered to be unlucky but I think a cellphone’s flashlight doesn’t count. Anyway, going to the bathroom at night is going to be spookier. :D 

Life’s been kind of hectic lately, mostly due to things outside of my control. I want to get a new job this summer. And fix my sleeping schedule. I’ve been getting stress dreams again for the first time in a while. I don’t count a bad dream as a nightmare unless I wake up terrified but it still sucks. Going to ask my doctor if melatonin is a good idea.  

My dog (see above) had a nasty cough after getting knocked out for some dental surgery, which is supposed to be normal, but it lasted for a while so we took her to the vet. And it turns out that the reason she was scratching on my door every night to be let outside was because of a UTI. She’s doing better now. 

Mm, there’s a lot more things to talk about but I’ll save that for another post. 

The Dark Knight: There was a scene where a bunch of men got their uniforms stolen and they were tied up and g*gged. I watched the trilogy out of order. To be honest, I get kind of bored watching these but the villains are cool. Bane’s darling but now that I’ve seen Venom I prefer Eddie Brock. Jonathan Crane is kind of cute, too. 

Now I finally get why people like the Joker so much. He gives not a single f*ck. So many things could go wrong at any moment during his plans, he relies so much on luck, but he has so much confidence. I feel like if tried to slide down a hill of money I would hurt myself. The best scene was the Joker walking quickly out and away from the hospital. Also, the bank heist in the beginning. 

Crimson Peak started to get good when Edith and Lucille were having the butterfly discussion and ended up being better paced than I thought it would be. But after Carter got his head smashed in, I’m not sure why Edith would go with Thomas after that. 

Gothic horror is actually fun to learn about in school because the genre’s progenitors would probably be into yandere and monster f*cking. It’s like... In the first art history class I took, we were looking at Renaissance paintings and there was a fair amount of stuff with a de*th and the maiden motif. The modern equivalent would be a lot of metal album covers.

Brain Damage: I was looking for infestation movies and I’m so glad I stumbled upon this. Not because it’s particularly good but ‘cause the MC is super cute. Basically the talking leechy thing pumps Brian full of an addictive fluid through the the back of his neck and they have a faux symbiotic relationship where Aylmer gorily eats other people’s brains.

There was a scene where Brian’s brother answers the phone lying on his stomach in his und*rwear. Followed by a scene where Brian takes his pants off and you see his t*sh. Also a very brief M/F/M thr*some dream that gets gruesome real quick. 

The Stuff: If you’re into The Blob, you’ll probably like this. The mode of killing is a bit different. Stuff’s alive and controls people from the inside. 

A Cure for Wellness: Shout out to his movie for showing n*ked/scantily clad old people without getting weird about it. Within the first half hour I was surprised when it didn’t do well at the box office. The visuals draw you in but it was probably too long and could have been better. I wasn’t expecting to it get kind of fantastical. It’s got existentialism, surrealism, mystery... Uhhhh... I’m not sure whether to classify it as fantasy or sci fi. 

Venom: Hits so many k*nks. Dan’s cute, Anne has good taste in men. Carlton Drake gets symbioted. Actually, I’m not sure if he or Eddie is sexier. The first guy to get possessed in the Eminem video is also cute. Best line is Venom saying, “Look at her. She has no idea we are going to get her back.” The Rorschach-like ending credits were cool. 

Sleepaway Camp: Before I watched this, I already knew the ending. Sort of. To be honest, I expected “Angela” to be an offensive portrayal of a trans woman but the situation was more like David Reimer, minus g*nital m*tilation. The ending itself... Aunt Martha may not have gone on a murder spree but she’s the scariest person in the film. Otherwise I wouldn’t have said there’s anything terribly special about this film. Based on the synopsis of the sequel, I’m probably not going to watch the rest of the franchise. 

Hell Fest: Pretty typical modern slasher but the atmosphere is great. It was also funny. I’m just gonna use bullet points for this.

“You know what? He deserves at least some dignity after death.” “Let’s give him a b*ner.” 

When asked if he mentioned something about having a f*tish for p*ddles, Gavin answers, “I have never said that in my entire life.”

Why did Asher get hotter while he was struggling and getting stabbed in the eyeball?

It took me a minute to recognize Tony Todd. Sad. 

Men in Black II: At no point in the film did Serleena, who is capable of transformation and has tentacles, transform into a male und*rwear model. :’( 

Fullmetal Alchemist: (The manga.) A military fantasy that raises some good questions about ethics. And dat solar aesthetic. The chimera designs were so cool. Envy is a cruel, skimpily dressed shapeshifter with a grotesque “true form” and Lin gets willingly possessed by Greed. So that’s right up my alley. 

Break My Heart 1,000 Times: Good time to read this. It takes place in February. Read this because I Still See You has Richard Harmon. The book started off decently but I didn’t like the protagonist’s behavior near the end of part three. And there’s some sexism. Like hysterically slapping her love interest and blaming herself for not having any weapons in her room because she’s a girl. Seriously, I keep a bigass King James Bible on my nightstand. If anyone breaks in, they’re getting brained by the Good Book. Or a lamp. Or the nightstand itself. But hopefully my dog would maul an intruder first. 

Christine: Wasn’t really into it but you might be if you’re into corruption, e.g. a nerdy guy becoming slightly more physically appealing jerk*ss. 

The 100: I got teary-eyed when Clarke and Lexa were saying goodbye and then the latter accidentally gets short. Poor Murphy can’t catch a break, as usual. Started season four the other day. 

Hostel: DUMB REASON TO GO “OUT OF BOUNDS”, FELLAS.

Going into this, I thought I’d like Jay Hernandez’s character the most but then I found the other guys cuter until the end then I really liked Paxton. Weirdly enough, I found Alexei cute. There’s decent whump but I’m not into v*mit. 

I think I saw an ad with the guy who tortured Paxton when I was in elementary school but I mistook it for something from one of the Saw movies. This was obviously before I had any interest in watching these kinds of movies. XD  

Songs of the Day: I’ve been listening to a lot of Dead inside the Chrysalis/Dedderz lately... I’m crushing on Manek Deboto. He should be the one wearing a th*ng in the She’s So Rad music vid! If they ever do  “He’s So Rad” they should include Elm Street’s Jesse Walsh and Brian from Brain Damage...

Ghost of you, 9/?

Volume: 1.

Number of parts: 9/?.

Pairings: Human!Nine x Rose; Human!Ten x Jack; Clara Oswald x Olivia Baxter (OC).

Synopsis: "Maybe had they done a mistake by giving Maxence a sedative."

A/N: I've started writing this fiction last year after I had a particularly weird dream (as usual) and after I wrote the prologue, I've put it aside to work on other stuff. I've gone back to it not so long ago and decided that it would be the fiction I would post next, after not posting anything for a while. I must have watched I am legend and Game of thrones way too much to come out with something like this but I hope you will like it. I am not a scientist, nor did I have a particular knowledge of sciences. I do my researches on the internet like everyone to make sure everything is as close to the reality as possible. I have a literature degree only. Writing is what I do and it makes me explore next fields, and learn new things.

“It is safer and wiser to cure unhealthy rivalry than to suppress it.” - Obafemi Awolowo.

CHAPTER 9:

Rose was back to her previous spot: in the cage with the shadow of her husband. He was still asleep. The sedative Liv had given him must have been a really strong one or it was just that he needed that sleep. The rats and even Peggy showed no sign of needing sleep. They barely ever lay down and got some rest. They were always going round and round in their cages. Only the sane rats were getting sleep. The infected ones who weren’t showing symptoms were sleeping too. Maybe had they done a mistake by giving Maxence a sedative. She approached the interactive glass wall and checked his vital signs. Another invention from Zachary: inject tiny self-destructive sensors connected to the lab system in the blood of the subject. It was easier than sticking sensors on every inch of skin. Sensors that could be torn off whenever that subject was angry. The negative point of those sensors was that they were less economical because you had to renew them every week. It was already a miracle that they could survive so long in a hostile system and Zachary was doing his best for them to last longer. Anyway, this was a great evolution for their work. It made things a lot easier. Especially since they could see what a nightwalker was able to do. Rose observed the details displayed on the wall. Maxence’s vital signs were different from usual, more human like. Nightwalkers had a very high blood pressure and so their heartbeats were faster than normal. But at this precise moment, Maxence was showing almost normal vital signs. Was it the sedative? Like an after effect or something? She glanced at Maxence. His skin was still translucid with blue tentacles and yet, she could see through this ghostly appearance. Rose opened a video recording software. She was gonna do her new video log here. It wasn’t like she had anyone to talk to. Maxence was just asleep from the drugs and Zachary was himself napping behind the control panels. He had done his job perfectly and could get some rest. No one was gonna report him to Tegan. Just like no one was gonna report Rose because she was being too close of an infected person. They were a family and a family stuck together whenever they were facing a hard time. Sixth day of October 2017. Day 1750 since the infection. Rose Spitz video log. A few hours have barely passed by since the arrival of our first and only living specimen but we’re already working hard to improve and correct our attempts of a cure. It’s too early to have any real result but some differences already show up between humans and animals. If our current patient suffers from the same symptoms the rats and Peggy have, he’s also distinguishing himself by having different reactions. We know for sure that infected people are deprived of all the primary needs: they don’t feel the thirst, the hunger or the need for sleep. That’s what we think at least because that’s what we’ve seen so far but our patient number one shows us another side of this disease. A more human side of it. At 5:33am, he was given a sedative, a normal dose for a normal human since we didn’t know what dose would work on him. He has fallen asleep in a few seconds. His system has recognised the sedative and reacted positively to it. Right now, it’s 6:43am and the patient is still asleep. He almost seemed normal like this, if it wasn’t for the translucent skin and blue tentacles. His system is also reacting to the sedative, calming down his vital signs. 72 beats every minute, blood pressure at 130/85mmHg, PaO2 at 78mmHg and pulse ox at 92 percent. Still out of the normal rates but close enough. The sedative forced the system to a more human pace. The patient hasn’t woken up yet. We may have another hour before he does. Unless it goes wrong. Rose swallowed and shut the video recording. She sent the file to her computer and shut the interactive screen. She pressed her forehead against the cold glass. It was hard to speak of her husband that way but it was her job and she had to do it, to tell all the small details that could lead them to that cure. She didn’t have any idea of where they were going at the moment. She just had the feeling of going nowhere, of losing everything, and she hated this. She hated feeling so powerless while everyone around her was falling. She didn’t even have her job to keep her mind distracted because her job reminded her of Maxence, of all the time he had spoken to her about sciences, about all the things he had taught her, about all the moments they had had together until now. She turned around and looked at the sleeping form of her formerly husband. She imagined him outside of this cage, outside of this lab. She imagined him in their bed, at home. He wouldn’t wear these awful grey pyjamas. Instead, he would be in his boxers, or even naked. She had photographed him many times while he was asleep and completely unaware. The pictures did justice to him only when he wasn’t posing for them. Her fingers would brush over his naked skin and he would smile as his body would cover in gooseflesh. His voice would be husky from the sleep he would wake up from slowly. He would wrap his arms around her and press his lips to hers. And he would make love to her softly. A repetitive beeping interrupted her daydreaming and she quickly wiped the single tear rolling on her cheek. Well, tried too. Her hand met with the plastic of her suit protecting her from the virus. How she wanted to rip it away! But she wasn’t Maxence, she wouldn’t accept being a science subject. It meant they would have to kill her or throw her out of this place. And she wouldn’t bear being away from Maxence even if she was losing herself to the noctiagus. His love for her was stronger than his love for science. She was convinced that it was that love he had for her that forced him back here to serve as a science subject. He had wanted to stay by her side, he had known she would take care of him and his first reactions to her presence had made her certain of it. She looked at the wall. The beeping wasn’t coming from it. She had shut the interactive functions. She glanced around her. Nothing was susceptible of making that beeping sound in there and she couldn’t hear sounds from the outside as long as the intercom was off. Then, she realised that it came from her jeans pocket. Her phone was beeping. Probably out of battery. It would shut off soon enough and she would have to charge it to have access to her pictures with Maxence. This sudden thought gave her an idea. She reactivated the interactive wall and logged in her personal cloud. She picked some of the best pictures she had of Maxence and herself, of him and his friends, of him and his colleagues. Once she had all the pictures she needed, no more than ten, she logged out of her cloud. When Maxence would be awake, she would try something with him. She shut the interactive wall again and walked to her husband. His vital signs were almost normal, human. She delicately lifted one of his eyelids. His eyes were as black as when he had arrived here but she could see a pale blue circle in the middle. The ghost of the blue eyes she couldn’t see before. Did it mean that the true Maxence was coming back to her? She could only hope for it. Her hand softly stroked his hairy cheek. He hadn’t shaved in a while. It didn’t bother her. She liked when he was a bit hairy. It was making him sexier. He always laughed whenever she said it. He was refusing to think of himself as handsome. Gargoyle was the word he used. Rose jumped when he suddenly opened his eyes and stared at her with those black frightening eyes. The blue ring was still there. He blinked a couple times, something she had seen him do more than once since he was a nightwalker. It wouldn’t be a bad idea to check his sight. No one had thought of it so far. She stayed still and observed him. He raised a hand and placed it over hers on his cheek. A smile crossed his lips and he tried to speak. A reflex he was supposed to have lost. Nothing came out of his throat but Rose could see the word. Her name. It was her name. “Yes, my love. I’m here.” She gave him a kind reassuring smile but she could see his fear of facing his wife in a cosmonaut suit. He could not even touch her or kiss her. That was frustrating him. He tried to speak again but words remained stuck. He choked on them. “Shh, it’s okay. You can’t speak, honey. Your brain doesn’t know what it is anymore.” But the fact he could think of precise words was a good thing. It meant part of his brain was still working and thinking quite clearly. She had to write it down in her report. “You’re home. In the lab. We’re taking great care of you.” Maxence sat up slowly. He wished Rose wasn’t wearing this suit. He wanted to touch her. He was dying to touch her. But he couldn’t. He didn’t want to contaminate her and force her to live in one of those cages. He scratched his neck and his fingers met the bandage covering the bite. He frowned. Rose took his hand in hers. “Do you remember how it happened?” It was a bit blurry at first, but the memories came back to him. The mission outside, the kid, the bite, Allegro dragging him away from the nightwalkers, being locked in a bunker, and the crate. Allegro had put him in the crate and brought him back here. He acquiesced. “You’re healing well. The wound wasn’t pretty but it’s better now. I’ll change the bandage later.” The memories were haunting his mind now and it was making him nervous. Rose could feel it. Her hand found his face again and forced him to look up at her. The light circle of blue was already fading away and it saddened her. She was about to hug him, to comfort him, when she saw movements in the cage next to Maxence’s. It had been activated and Zachary was checking all the settings to be sure it was okay to welcome another infected person. Rose walked to the intercom. “Zach? What is going on?” “Liv has Allegro’s results. He’s infected. No symptoms on him. But the virus is in him.” “Damn it.” On the bed, Maxence had grabbed his head in his hands. That was entirely his fault if Allegro was infected, if Xavier was dead. For a nightwalker, he was experiencing a lot of feelings. This part of his brain was supposed to shut down with the virus. Was it because he was struggling not to lose his humanity? “T is working on the scans you’ve made. He wants you to go and work on the samples you have. Adam is already done with the blood.” Rose was ignoring Zachary. She was too focused on her husband. She walked back to him. He was too anxious. Definitely something that only Maxence, the real Maxence, could do. She cupped his cheeks. “Look at me. Maxence, look at me. This is not your fault. Alright? You were given that order. It was his fault. He threw you on the lion’s den and I promise you we’ll find that cure and save you and Allegro. And then, we’ll kick their fucking asses. They have to pay for this. They will pay for this.” Maxence blinked. The blue rings were gone. He was gone. “I love you, Maxence. I’ll never let you down.” He tilted his head. He had understood what she was saying to him but he couldn’t answer to her, or feel something. His feelings were gone and he wanted them back. He wanted to feel what love was, what loving someone and being loved by this special someone felt like. And what did it mean, be strong? He watched her leave the cage. He could still see her – well, her silhouette – as she made her way to the other cage. He got up and went to the wall his cage shared with the other one. He saw three persons coming in. They put down the crate and opened it. Allegro was a much better patient than Maxence but they were different patients. The virus was acting differently on them but unfortunately, it was turning them into study objects. Rose didn’t stay with them for too long. Liv could perfectly handle the situation with Mickey and Kyle. She walked to Tegan’s office. The man was working on the scans. Markers were scattered all over his desk and the scans were full of notes. Rose knocked on the door. Tegan started and turned to face the door. When he saw her, he came to open the door. She stepped on and the door was closed behind her. “I guess you haven’t started working on the samples.” His tone was lightly blaming her for not working on their cure when it was getting more urgent than ever. “He needed me.” “He needs the cure.” “Speaking of this…” “You’ve found something?” “It’s more an observation that I’ve made by being around him. That sedative we gave him had some interesting side effects. I’ve recorded some of them on my video log but you might hear it now.” “Go on.” “The sedative makes him more human. His system is coming back to normal when he’s asleep. Heartbeats, breathing, blood pressure were back to the latest results we have from his medical visit. I’ve also noticed that his iris was visible in the black.” “Anything else?” “He tried to speak to me, and he was struggling against his feelings. Guilt, fear, confusion. It disappeared when the sedative stopped having an effect on him.” “Hm.” Tegan turned back to his scans and Rose raised an eyebrow. She was angry that he was ignoring her and considering these remarks as her undying hope to see something human in Maxence. She had seen it and it was on the video recording of the day. It wasn’t her imagination. It was real. “Come here.” He was bent over the scans once again and he made her a sign to come closer when she didn’t react. He wanted to show her something. She stepped closer and looked at all the scans, deciphering some of the writing on them. “Do you see it?” The difference between the three scans? She sure was seeing it for how clear it was. The first one was marked with a “before infection” note. It was Maxence’s results from the last checkup that had been made in him. The second was wearing the inscription “after infection – before the sedative”. The scan wasn’t one of the best since Maxence kept moving but it was clear enough to see that the brain wasn’t working like it should. On the third one – “after infection – after the sedative” – it was a mix between the two first ones. The areas controlling dreams and feelings were active when they were totally off when Maxence was awake. “The nigtwalkers are deprived from the primary needs that make us human: sleep, hunger, thirst, feelings. But if you force their system into one of those needs, like sleep, it appears that they can come back to their normal self. You’re not the only one to have noticed it, Rose.” “But it’s only temporary. Once the effects of the sedative wear off, he was that… he wasn’t himself anymore.” “Yes, but it’s another clue given to us. We just have to work on that new lead. Write your report and send it to me. I’ll transfer it to Martha with my own conclusions.” “Alright.” “And do your job before going back to him.” “Yes.” Tegan had made it sound like a suggestion but Rose was taking it as an order. After all, he was the boss now and she was just his second in command. And he was right, Maxence needed the cure more than he needed her. She was the one who needed him around, just to know that he was still there somehow. On that thought, she went to her lab to work on the samples she had taken from Maxence earlier.

x

Colin had managed to get his hands on Maxence’s blood. He had knocked Adam out for that one purpose. It had also been to give that little prat a little lesson he wouldn’t forget so easily. While he was counting the stars above his head, Colin had opened the cold room and had stolen some of the blood that was kept there. Only two tubs so no one would suspect anything. It wasn’t much to work with but it would do for now. Until Adam gave in and became his spy. He was working with precaution not to lose any drop of blood. It wasn’t easy to work with so little but he was still managing to get better results than that team of losers. They were gonna regret their decision to have put him aside when he would have found the solution. CBC with Differential/Platelet White blood cells: 12,8/ul. 4,0 – 10,5. Red blood cells: 4,5/ul. 4,10 – 5,60. Haemoglobin: 12,5/g/dL. 12,5 – 17,0. Haematocrit: 40%. 36,0 – 50. MCV: 84fL. 80 – 98. MCH: 27,2pg. 27,0 – 34,0. MCHC: 32,9g/dL. 32,0 – 36,0. RDW: 12%. 11,7 – 15,0. Platelets: 260/uL. 140 – 415. Neutrophils: 65%. 40 – 74. Lymphs: 46%. 14 – 46. Monocytes: 5%. 4 – 13. Eos: 3%. 0 – 7. Basos: 1%. 0 – 3. Neutrophils (Absolute): 7/uL. 1,8 – 7,8. Lymphs (Absolute): 4/uL. 0,7 – 4,5. Monocytes (Absolute): 0,4/uL 0,1 – 1,0. Eos (Absolute): 0,3/uL. 0,0 – 0,4. Baso (Absolute): 0,2/uL. 0,0 – 0,2. Immature Granulocytes: 0,5%. 0 – 1. Immature Gran (Abs): 0,1/uL. 0,0 – 0,1. Colin read the results of the test he had just done on Maxence’s blood. A simple complete blood formula to see where the troubles were. The results seemed pretty normal to him despite the current condition of the man. His body was fighting an infection which wasn’t surprising and it was trying to heal the bite and burns while fighting the virus. His immune system was overwhelmed with work and the fact that he wasn’t eating or sleeping wasn’t helping it to be stronger. So Maxence was suffering from a certain anaemia. Adam had noticed the presence of leukocytes in his own notes and he hadn’t made a conclusion of that, but Colin did. Those leukocytes, it meant the fool was fighting the virus as if he had any chance to heal himself with just his will. Something was forcing him to fight, to come back to his real self. His wife obviously. How cliché of him. For a friend of Maxence, these results would be alarming. If the man kept struggling against the virus, he would kill himself. His own body would work against him and slowly kill him. Good thing he was in a bubble completely sterile. His system could only fight one virus at a time and the noctiagus was the top priority. If he was to catch even a simple cold, he would suffer from it longer than normal. Or he would die from this. The two options were quite nice for Colin. He had stopped being Maxence’s friend a long time ago. They used to be rivals but Maxence getting it all had caused Colin to get envious and jealous and that was why they were the best enemies now. The world would be boring without an adversary as clever as Maxence. That was why Colin was working on this cure instead of watching everything happen. He would be the saviour for once. He was doing the work of many men and women all alone but he didn’t mind. He preferred working alone. Everyone was thinking he was a sociopath because of it, and because he liked seeing the others around him in pain. He wasn’t refuting those rumours. He liked hearing them here and now whenever he was walking in a corridor. He would rather be feared than loved. All the contrary of that good old Maxence. Better to reign in hell than serve in heaven once wrote Milton and Colin had made this quote his motto. The world was hell and he was forming his realm slowly. The first step was this: healing Maxence Spitz and showing him who was the best of them both. Colin considered himself as the best. After all, he wouldn’t have had the bad idea of getting infected and giving his body to sciences. He wasn’t so idiot, nor generous. He put a drop of blood on a small glass plate and sealed it. Then, he placed it under his microscope. The usual cells appeared under his eyes when he looked through the magnifying glass. He changed the settings of his work utensil to have a better sight on that unusual behaviour the cells were having. He found the usual lymphocytes – a great lot of them – monocytes, eosinophils, basophils, neutrophils and platelets. He also found the virus, a spiky ball of green and violet attacking the other cells and eating them. No mercy in there. The lymphocytes were producing antibodies to fight but the noctiagus was stronger than Maxence’s blood cells. It was winning and leaving bodies in its wake. This thing was worse than any existing cancer and Colin was fascinated by it. Whoever or whatever had created it was a real genius. He wished he was that genius. He put the small glass plate away and wrote some more notes on the cells behaviour. He had an idea of how he was gonna process to mix another cure. He wrote down the formula he had mixed previously for Rose and Clara. He grabbed another pen of another colour and corrected what was wrong in it. He replaced those false data with the ones he was deducing from his observations. It didn’t take him long before he could find a new formula that was more elaborate and more precise than the former one. Creating it was the hardest part. He took his time. He didn’t fear to be double-crossed by Tegan’s team. They were all a bunch of losers. Jack only thought about having sex with the whole building, Rose was too devastated by the loss of her husband to be efficient, Martha was far behind him, Tegan… Tegan was just a weak idiot who had been given power. And that power would destroy him. His new cure was done. The day had gone by very quickly and it was night again. He hadn’t slept in more than two days and yet, he was still good at what he was doing. He filled a small vial with a dark green fluid and put a cork on it. He made sure that it was well-sealed and stuck a label on it. He didn’t write the formula, just the number of the cure: #344. Then, he slipped it in his pocket and put away his notes. No one needed to know what he was doing in there. He left his lab when he was done. Now that his cure was done, he had to find a way to make sure it would be given to the idiot Maxence was. He went to the dormitories. He knew he would find Adam there. Liv must have examined him and sent him to rest. He couldn’t work with the headache he supposedly had now. But he could pretend he needed to see Maxence for a test. “I said I didn’t want to be a part of your plans.” Colin smirked and turned around. He hadn’t even had to go to the room Adam was sharing with his colleagues to find him. The young man came out of the small kitchen they had while Colin was walking down the corridor. He turned around. Except for them, the corridor was empty. “You also said you wanted to be the best.” “What is that supposed to mean?” “We both know you have no chance of finding a cure to this virus, pretty boy. You might be clever and manipulative, you don’t have the right knowledge to mix something as intricate as this cure.” He put his hand to his pocket and pulled out the vial he showed to Adam. “I do.” “How did you…” “It doesn’t matter. I’ve mixed a new cure and you’re the only one to know.” “Well, great for you. But you can’t get any close to Maxence.” “But you do.” “I won’t do that.” “And if that’s the right cure, Adam? You would leave your boss into the claws of death?” Adam hesitated. He was nervously picking at his fingers, thinking about he best way to do things. Colin was right: he couldn’t mix a cure on his own but Colin definitely could and he was real good at it. If the vial he had in hand was the solution to that virus and Adam refused to test it then, he was condemning Maxence. As ambitious as he was, Adam didn’t want anyone to die. So he had to give in and accept that cure. Colin was winning again. “What do you want?” “A copy of everything they will send to you. All the results of all the tests. I can’t have access to it but you do. I need them to do a better work. If the one I’ve done here isn’t good enough.” Colin lightly shook the vial and the dark green colour caught Adam’s eyes. He had no choice: he accepted and Colin gave him the new cure. Now, Adam had to find a way to give it to Maxence. Knowing the man wasn’t trusting anyone anymore, it wouldn’t be an easy task…

To be continued...

Ghost of you © | 2017 - 2018 | Tous droits réservés.

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In the next chapter:

Jack was highlighting the most important data from the results given by Tegan. He was remarking the same details that Colin had noted earlier – details he wouldn’t share – and came to the same conclusions. He was alarmed by the risks there were for Maxence to die from the virus so he sent a message to Liv and Zach for them to keep a closer eye on him and be sure he wouldn’t get in any trouble, more than he already was. This done, he worked on the DNA data he had gathered. Maxence’s results were similar to Peggy’s but his genetic code was presenting some interesting particularities that needed to be studied to find the reason why it was so different.

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The Umbrella Academy Season 2

“Since the second season of The Umbrella Academy is now on Netflix, I have decided to continue my fan fic. The reader is a member of the Umbrella Academy (#8) her powers allow her to become a human fire. Again this is a continuation of the 1st season’s fan fic. based on your perspective.

Season 2 Episode 5: “Valhalla”

“You know I’m starting to get the feeling Dad’s avoiding us” says Five irritated. “Hate to be the boring one, guys, but uh, it’s time to get the hell out of here” she says as she begins to walk away. “when you say “we” who exactly are you referring to?” asks Five suspiciously. “Not a lot of ambiguity in that sentence.” she answers acting confused by Five’s sudden question. “Listen, I don’t know who you are, or where you came from, but whatever it is, I’ advise you return posthaste.”threatens Five. “she’s right Five, we gotta get outta here” says Diego taking her side. “I just saved your life, you kinder shit. If I hadn’t stepped in, all that would be left of you is a blazer and some bloody socks” she says offended. “and that’s the problem, your too good says Five. “you ask too many questions, you know too much” you add as Diego looks at you. “and you fight like you know what you’re doing.” says Five. “they’ve got a point.” says Diego acknowledging the facts. “So I know how to handle myself, and that makes me the bad guy?” she asks rhetorically. “no your trained” you add. “whoever you are, you are in my way. If I see you again, I will kill you.” threatens Five before walking away, you decide to follow him. As kids you and Five weren’t the closest of siblings, since Five was very competitive and wasn’t content with you being slightly smarter or more cunning than him. Making him uneasy was always loads of fun as a child. However, when he went missing you gave up trying to compete with your siblings. However right now, you are more than thankful that hes around. 

In the morning you are woken up by your brothers arguing. “they are Swedish, you idiot” says Five You walk in and pour a cup of coffee. “hired guns paid to eradicate us, before we do any more damage to this timeline.” adds Five. “Yeah, but why now, I mean I’m fine for three months until you both showed up.” says Diego looking at both you and Five. “yeah, I was here for a year and no one messed with me.” adds Luther looking at Five. “Even if it was my fault which it isn’t, we only have 6 days before the end of the world, and the closest anyone’s gotten to dad was that driveway at the consulate.” says Five. “Oh and Diego getting stabbed” you add before taking a drink of coffee. “Well, that’s not exactly true.” says Luther. You all look at him confused. “What do you mean?” asks Five. “I saw him” says Luther. He then proceeds to tell you all how he went back to the academy to meet dad as he eats breakfast. “That’s pathetic, “ says Diego . “Yeah well at least he didn’t shank my ass” says Luther in response, this making you laugh. “No bro he shanked, your heart.” says Diego. “Is that my bathrobe?” asks Elliot as he walks into the kitchen and sees Luther. “NO” says Luther clearly guilty. “look who cares what he shanked, He knows something about time travel.” says Five. “Wait, why don’t you just do your thing and uh, time travel us out?” asks Elliot, clueless. “anyone care to explain?” asks Five. “the first time he tried he got lost int he apocalypse” says Luther with a mouth full. “second time he ended up with out hair on his balls.” adds Diego. “the last time I tried, I scattered my family across three years, in Dallas Texas, possibly triggering a doomsday” says Five as he is pouring himself another cup of coffee. “any more questions Elliot?” you ask. “Uh no” says Elliot “Guys you’re all missing the big picture, dad is the ringleader of a sinister cabal, that’s planning to kill the president.” says Diego as you roll your eyes. “cabal?” asks Luther confused. “ignore him” you add, Diego looks at you irritated. “look the way I see it, we only have one option” says  Five. “Oh yeah and what’s that?” ask Luther confused. “It’s time to get the Umbrella Academy back together.”says Five you clap in agreement. "hell yeah, family meeting.”says Diego. "Okay then, can one of you get Allison please?"" says Luther looking sad. "You two still a thing?”asks Diego. "Do we need to talk?”he adds. "No, she's married." says Luther looking sad. "whoa. Dude, that's rough." says Diego. " I know that feeling too well bro” you say before sipping some coffee. " I can handle it” he says. "i'll get her can you ah get Vanya with out squeezing her to death.”says Five. "i'll try”says Luther with his mouth full, then Five simply zaps out. " wait, uh what should I do?” asks Elliot. "prepare for company”says Diego, "here ill help you clean up a bit” you say guiding Elliot into the living space. 

After Luther gathers Vanya he brings her back to Elliot's place. You were happily helping him make some strange desert looking thing. Honestly you had a good time listening to him talk about various foods, it made you feel normal. As we wait for everyone else he begins to tell us about various Jell-O flavors.  "Ya'll know Jell-O used to be a delicacy. You know in order to make it, you gotta boil down a while mess of hooves..you know horses, cows, pigs, it doesn't matter. But you know not everybody has a mess of hooves just lying around. It wasn't until uh...couple of sassy New Yorkers figured out how to dry it out so that the rest of us could have a, a chance to enjoy this ambrosia.” he says ïf we have some, will you shut up?”asks Diego. "maybe, here”says Elliot as he begins to serve us some Ambrosia salad. You were never a picky eater, in fact you were interested in the taste. "how you feeling?” Luther asks Vanya. "pretty shitty to be honest.”she says. "hu me too”you say taking a spoon full into your mouth. "where would you say you are on a scale from one to ending all life on this planet?”asks Diego as hes playing with a knife, "Really?”asks Vanya rhetorically, "Diego, put the knife away, you idiot she's fine”says Luther. "last time I saw this one she had me suspended midair, sucking the life out of me, with energy tentacles. I think I'm allowed a little time to process." says Diego. "don't worry Vanya he's not going to do anything” you say trying to ease the tension. "oh, I would like to see an energy tentacle.”adds Elliot intrigued. " Oh I don't remember what I did, but I'm sorry..if..if that means anything.”she says genuinely sorry. "it does, just going through a lot right now”says Diego putting the knife down. "There's this girl I like, I thought she liked me, but turns out that she's”he begins to say when a door opens. "oh thank goodness” you say underneath your breath as you get up to look at the front door. " Is anyone here? hello?” asks Allison. You quickly run down the stairs to greet her and Klaus. "oh wow look at this old stuff” says Klaus as you run towards them. "oh wow I know this is impossible, but did we all get sexier?”he says as he sees you. You jump on him and he hugs you tightly. "I missed you hottie”he says into your neck."I'm glad your okay”you say as he puts you back on the floor. Diego go in for the hug. "oh you are drunk” he says. "yeah, no just a little, just a few..oh that's so sweet.”he says joining Vanya and Allison hugging. He gives Vanya a kiss on her head before letting go. You then hug Allison. "Klaus is Ben here?”asks Five curiously. "oh uh no, no unfortunately ghost can't time travel." says Klaus. You take his hand in yours and intertwine your fingers. Klaus was always your favorite sibling. 

" Alright then. Lets get down to business.”says Five as he leads us all back up to the living space. " So Vanny what's new?”Klaus asks Vanya as you three walk up the stairs together. It felt so nice to have you all together again. "Alright first off I want to say I'm sorry. I know I really screwed the pooch on this whole, going back in time and getting stuck thing. But the real kick in the pants here is we brought the end of the world back here with us.”says Five. "oh my god again?”asks Klaus as he is pouring himself a drink as he looks at everyone. "all of you knew? Why am I always the last one to find out about the end of the, oh my god.. my cult is going to be so pissed, Five! I told them we had until 2019.” says Klaus. "a cult?”you ask him and he simply shrugs. "We have until Monday, we have 6 days” answers Five. " Is it Vanya?”asks  Klaus. "Klaus” says Allison. "What? it's usually Vanya.”says Klaus defensive. "Do you have any leads, Five?” Vanya asks ignoring Klaus. "Yeah we have one” answers Five as Diego hands him a folder, and he hands it to Allison. " Holy shit is that dad?”she asks as soon as she opens it. "yup” you say sitting on Klaus' lap. " that's him?”asks Vanya as she takes a closer look at the photo. " Standing on the grassy knoll" says Diego. "Diego, Y/N and I have been trying to talk to Dad about what exactly this means, So far we've got nothing.”says Five. "not nothing, he's planning to kill Kennedy”says Diego. "maybe” you add, with a shrug. Diego just looks at you. "we don't know who or what sets doomsday in motion, could be Kennedy, could be something entirely independent." you add defensive "but what we do know is that something changes the timeline and we have to make it right again.” adds Five nodding in agreement with you. "Yeah, but how, if we don't know what's broken?”asks Allison. "Come on do the math. We know dad's having shady ass meeting with some shady ass people. We know he's on the grassy knoll in three days to kill the president. So I think we all know what we have to do.”says Diego. "find dad” says Five while Diego says "kill dad"  you all look around confused. "None of us are suppose to be here right? I mean what if it's us? Has anyone here done anything to screw up the timeline?”asks Vanya. "she has a point” you add as Klaus is playing with the hem of your dress and shaking his head. "Diego's been stalking Lee Harvey Oswald.”snitches Luther. "And you're working for Jack Ruby” says Diego pointing at Luther. " Allison has been very involved in local politics." adds Klaus. "Okay, you started a cult" she sasses back to him. ''I'm just a nanny on a farm. I don't have anything to do with all of that. "says Vanya trying to state her case. "Well maybe you do, we just don't know it yet." adds Allison. Diego whistles loudly, trying to get everyone's attention. "Listen to yourselves, everything in our new lives is connected to Kennedy. That can't be a coincidence. Luther works for Ruby, Allison is protesting the government, dad is on the grassy knoll, Klaus is..,doing something weird and pervy, but probably related. See clearlywe were all sent back here for one special reason...saving John Fitzgerald Kennedy." says Diego, this causing everyone to argue, you turn towards Five for some clarity. "Guys you all die, I was there. I saw it,And I wanna forget it, but I can't...I saw Russian Nukes vaporize the world with all of you in it, in a war that never happened until we brought it here. Hazel gave his life to save us, so you may need to shut up and just listen to me. I don't know if the things we've experienced here are all connected. I don't know if there's a reason for everything, but dad will. We need to talk to him before everyone and everything we know is dead." says Five trying to reason with everyone. " Okay, I'm out”says Luther. You look at him confused, and disappointed as he gets off the chair. " Did you even hear me, Luther?" asks Five annoyed. "yeah. yeah I did, I heard a 58 year old man, who still want his daddy to come and fix everything.Well, you can count me out. It's time we all grow the hell up." says Luther before he walks off. "Luther”calls out Allison but he ignores her. Diego goes after him. "Where are you going" he asks. " Save it Diego." says Luther as he walks down the stairs. Five zaps out and meets him down . "No one leaves until we figure this out”threatens Five. '' Is he stupid?”you ask rhetorically as you get off Klaus’ lap and stand over the railing. You see Luther toss five off the stairs, but before he hits the ground he zaps off.  you turn around and see Klaus eating the Ambrosia salad. "You know I could really go for some tacos right now, Allison?Tacos?" he asks. " shouldn't we wait?" she suggest. "You know those guys, I mean it could take forever for them to bro it out. Vanya Tacos?”he asks. "tacos? I'm in”you say encouragingly, after the last couple of days you've had you could use a little distraction. "Is there anyway that tacos are going to cause the end of the world?”asks Vanya. You shake your head, as Allison gets her purse. " I mean there is only one way to find out, right?”says Klaus snapping his finger. "lets go!" you call out as you take his hand in yours. 

After eating Tacos you all gather at the hair salon that  Allison works at. She begins to play with Klaus’hair while you and Vanya sit and watch. She then begins to talk about her new husband. "the nerve of that man. I mean one thing goes wrong and he's on a warpath, I mean, doesn't know who I am?"No, no NO, Ray you know exactly who I am you just can't handle it." she rants. You simply drink the booze and listen to her, while Vanya is playing with the beer bottles and Klaus i smoking a cigarette. "I'm protecting him”she says. "from what?”asks Klaus. "The end of the world, for one”she adds. "is the world really going to end?”asks Vanya. "Five, keeps secrets but he's almost always right” you say before taking a drink. "it did last time, and we did everything Five could think of to stop it." adds Allison. "Hey wouldn't it be weird if Five grew up all hot? Wouldn't that be weird?" says Klaus. "What eww” says Allison. " I mean... not really I always thought he was cute when we were children” you say. Allison looks at you surprised. "You thought all of us were cute" says Klaus. "nope just you and Diego and apparently Five�� says Allison making you giggle." In my defense we only ever saw each other and well Luther was a tad bit to boring for my taste." you say winking at Allison. "yeah miss "Luther was my lover" says Klaus followed by making kissing noises. "we have never even kissed" says Allison defensive. "yeah but you guys were making little sick moon dog eyes at each other all through puberty and breakfast and all that." adds Klaus. "agreed" you add. "how about you two and Diego Y/n your little triangle?”adds Allison. "nothing ever happened, what Klaus and I have is strictly platonic, we have an agreement to just be us around each other, plus Diego's and idiot anyways.” you say rolling your eyes. "Aren't we all brothers and sisters, or..?”asks Vanya confused, Klaus snorts. "Well.. technically, it" starts Allison but Klaus interrupts her. " Technically ? if you have to word... if you have to use the word technically, you are already in trouble.”he says stammering through the sentence. "okay, can we focus? I mean clearly we're not saving the wold tonight, but maybe, we could at least try to save my marriage." adds Allison. "No, no because that's like asking a nun how to hump someone's leg. I mean who in this room knows shit about relationships? This one? In secret love with Farm Frau." says Klaus pointing at Vanya. "her name is sissy.”Vanya adds. "which is an improvement, on her previous love interest, the serial killer. “says Klaus. "what?”asks Vanya shocked. You simply nod. "meanwhile i'm carrying a torch for a soldier I haven't technically me yet, Y/N doesn't want to acknowledge her feelings for Diego,  and Diego is clueless, Luther is in love with his sister" he adds. "Okay again we are not biological."says Allison defensive. "I agree with that"' you say before taking another sip of alcohol. "Face it the healthiest long term relationship in this family was when Five was banging that mannequin. The only thing the Umbrella Academy knows about love, is how to screw it up.” he says raising his cup. "i'll cheers to that”you say as you raise your bottle. "cheers"' says Allison and Vanya in unison before you all take a drink. "How do you guys deal with this?'' asks Vanya. "'what?" you ask her confused. "I mean, all of it... the time travel, seeing the dead, the end of the world.”she says. "well I get really high, she runs away, Allison...Allison lies to herself” he says as Allison kicks a stool at him. "and you suppress all your emotions deep, deep down until you... you blow shit up.”says Klaus. "yeah, i'd really like to not do that anymore." says Vanya. "well you got 6 days missy." you add. "What the hell are we suppose to do with 6 days?”asks Allison. "Party? I don't know.”scoffs Klaus. " I'm gunna tell Sissy that I love her. I don't want any secrets. “says Vanya clearly drunk. "yeah. yeah, yeah your right yes cause, you know, if it's all going to go tits-up, the least I can do is be honest with my husband.” says Allison agreeing with her. "oh does that mean I have to face my cult? I just hate group break ups, it's why I stopped dating twins.”says Klaus. "well I'm not telling Diego, he's in love, and it's really not the best time”you say before taking a drink. "This family is amazing" says Vanya. You three laugh. "yeah right let's not get ahead of ourselves.”says Allison. "come here Vanya” you say inviting her to a group hug. "I love you guys”says Klaus as he holds us tight. "oh you guys, I love this song”says Allison as she puts the volume up on the small radio. You all begin to dance along with her. Ending in a fit of giggles.