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jungshookz · 5 years

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beauty & the bookworm {librarian!namjoon}

→ pairing: kim namjoon x reader

→ genre: librarian!namjoon who’s a little nerdy a little dorky but we loVe it, university!au, y/n’s the brat this time around, fluff softer than clouds, a bit of heartwrenching angst :’(, BTS as in BIG TIME smU T

→ wordcount: 20.8k this will definitely make the app crash as per usual don’t come for me

→ note: okay first and foremost i apologize because this is wAY overdue! i started writing librarian!joon in october but i kept putting him off and it’s not what he deserves :-(( but the most important thing is that he’s here now and he’s ready to trip his way into your hearts!! also i finally gave one of my fics a title instead of just naming the au so we’re spicing things up for the new year! enjoy!!

pst if u wanna talk to y/n or joonie or even jimin u know what to do ;-)

(gif isn’t mine!)

(((and the read more function iS there but most of the time it doesn’t work on mobile :// i am sorry don’t attack me by sending passive-aggressive anon messages)))

you’ve always been the type of person to just go with the flow

whenever life throws an obstacle your way you somehow always aLways make it out alive

you always have a backup plan and you never worry about anything

because worrying gives you frowning wrinkles and you want your skin to remain smooth and beautiful

maybe it’s maybelline??? maybe it’s just not giving a fuCk

but this is the first time you’ve ever been… slightly concerned

you are in unfamiliar territory because you feel

…worried

and you don’t like this feeling at all

“i don’t know what to tell you, y/n. you’re failing three of your courses. you need extra credit.” your counsellor looks at you and then looks back down at his laptop where he has your transcript opened up

“okay! okay okay cool cool cool that’s fine” you clear your throat and nod quickly “extra credit is fine. no need to worry.”

“well, i wouldn’t say no need to worry. there’s definitely room for worry here.”

you thought you had the hang of this university thing but apparently not since jin just told you you’re failing three of your damn courses

kim seokjin - he graduated like two years ago and is your academic counsellor

he’s a pretty cool guy most of the time!! sometimes his dad jokes makes you want to slam your face into a wall but other than that he’s cool

and he’s always there to help you whenever you feel like you’re struggling

he’s a good counsellor but right now he’s being an awful counsellor and not even offering you an ouNCe of support

just kidding you’re just mad at yourself and you’re taking it out on literally anyone you see

you lean forward a little to try and get a sneak peek of your transcript and jin shifts his laptop away

you huff and lean back against the plushy sofa chair “so… how am i supposed to get extra credit?” you inspect your nails uninterestedly because you’re supposed to be napping right now but obviouSly you’re not going to be able to catch some extra z’s today because of this stupid meeting about your stupid grades

“summer school is an option.”

just the thought of summer school makes you feel nauseous

you’re not going to spend two months writing a philosophy paper or studying for an exam when you could be on a beach somewhere or on a road trip with jimin and the others

thank u next bitch

“please tell me there’s something else. anything else??” you frown and slump against his desk and he lets out a sigh before rifling through some loose papers on his desk

“which prof do i have to go down on to get extra credit” you joke but the smile drops from your face when jin raises a disapproving brow at you

“if you’re lucky, maybe you can find a part-time job on campus. usually you can get extra credit from doing things here! last i heard there was a position to be the school mascot!”

omg

yuck

having to jump around in a slightly damp and sewage-scented costume for two hours??

no thanks

jin can tell by your expression that that’s the last thing you want

“i hate to break it to you, y/n, but you can’t exactly be picky here. go to main hall where they stick up all those posters and job offers - maybe you’ll find something good! cheer up, hm?”

“yeah, yeah” you murmur and scratch the back of your head before standing up and swinging your bag over your shoulder

“oh, and y/n?”

“what?”

“maybe you should study instead of watching netflix all the time - you really have to boost your grades this term otherwise… y’know” he winces

‘y’know’ means you’re not going to frickin graduate

“…bye jin” you mutter and shut the door behind you before letting out a breath

well

that was a depressing conversation

jin didn’t even tell you a dad joke this time around

as you make your way to the main hall you can’t help but let out another sigh of disappointment

in high school you had eeeehhhhh average grades like you were kinda dumb but not thAt dumb

but you never expected yourself to faiL classes

you thought you were smarter than this!!! obviously not tho

you let out a huff as you stand in front of the bulletin board

there’s an overwhelming number of posters ranging from poetry sLAM competitions to math tutoring services and you don’t know where the heck to start

okay let’s see

what can we do

‘do you have school spirit? do you need extra credit? why not try being our adorable school masco-‘

“nope” you click your tongue and immediately look at the next poster

‘looking for a philosophy tutor for philosophy102’

philosophy is one of the classes you’re failing so maybe not that one either

‘looking for water girl/water boy for new school year! email coach bang for more details’

good god

the water girl??

that would be pathetic

that min yoongi tho

wOO you are definitely thirsty for him

but not thirsty enOugh because there’s no way you’re going to be known as the dang water girl

‘ocean expedition next summer? come to seashell city and explore the ancient legend of the mermaid… extra credit included!’

now thAt sounds cool

but next summer??? you’re not planning to still be here neXt summer

you’re running out of options here

the ones that you’ve seen just don’t sit well with you

the ones that seem okay are already all booked up

you raise a brow when you find a smaller note pinned under an obnoxiously neon pink ‘JOIN THE CHEERLEADING SQUAD’ poster

oh cute

it’s a picture of a book

‘booking for extra credit? there’s no one to blame but your-shelf if you let this job opportunity slip away! come to the library and check it out!’

you cringe in your soul and shake your head

a 60 year old grandpa definitely wrote this up

you take the note off the bulletin board and re-read it

urhghUAhfasj

are u really going 2 do this

you really gon spend most of your time at the library instead of, oh, i don’t know, literally anYTHING ELSE

“beggars can’t be choosers” you mumble to yourself

plus this option doesn’t seem like it needs a lot of skill so it should be easy-peasy lemon-squeezy

the extra credit will just fall right onto your lap

but at the same time

you despise the library

it’s too quiet

you can’t eat or drink in there

it always smells like musty old books

everyone’s always hogging the charging ports

you can’t talk without someone giving you a dirty look because apParently you’re being too loud when you wereN’T EVEN being that loud

your stomach always rumbles in the library and you end up not studying because you’re too focused on wondering what you should get for dinner

the last time you were at the library you were only there because jimin wanted to get some studying done and he needed a study partner

but that was literally like last year

now if he wants a study partner you tell him ‘it’s mY way or the highway’ which means you force him to study at your dinky apartment

you purse your lips and read the note yet aGAin

it seems like this is the option that makes you want to rip your fingernails off the least

it’s the library i guess

*confetti*

“what’s the matter with you?” jimin pokes your cheek with his fork before digging into his spaghetti

you scowl and rub the dot of tomato sauce off your cheek

“i’m failing three of my classes” you mutter before slumping against the table “and now i have to work at the library everyday to get extra credit”

jimin shrugs

“at least you’re not failing all of your classes?”

“i’m taking four courses this semester. i’m failing three out of four classes.”

jimin pauses and purses his pillowy lips

“like i said…at least you’re not failing four out of four classes?” he offers through a mouthful of pasta

he swallows “plus the library isn’t all that bad! books are… books are like… cool”

“you’re not doing a very good job of making me feel better”

“well, i don’t wanna be that friend - but you kinda did this to yourself!!!! working at the library is a consequence of not doing well in class, y/n. i’m sorry to break it to you, but you gotta do what you gotta do. you’re not allowed to complain because you let this happen to yourself.” jimin sighs frustratedly because as much as he loves you it’s so iRRitating when you’re whining about problems that could’ve very easily been avoided

“ya i guess so” you mutter

yeah

it’ll be fine

becoming a librarian will be great

maybe you’ll absorb the information from all the books that you’ll be hanging around with all day and become smart enough to graduate and not need the extra credit

jimin jumps when you let out a groan and smack your head against the table in defeat

life is really kicking your ass right now and is showing absolutely no mercy

“you want me to go in with you and drop you off at the counter?” jimin smiles sweetly and you shake your head and slip your arm from his

“this is a battle i’m going to have to face alone.” you shake a fist in front of you

“go on, my brave warrior.” jimin says dramatically before nodding “i’ll see you tomorrow!”

you let out a sigh before pushing the doors open and letting yourself in

you see a couple people sitting here studying

it is exam season after all

speaking of exam season u should probably start studying

you don’t remember the last time you were at the library

you came in once because you needed to pee really bad and this was where the nearest washroom was

also why is it so biG

there’s nobody at the front counter so you assume the guy went to the back because there’s like another room behind the desk

you whistle a tune to yourself as you lean against the counter and scroll through your phone

you’re blissfully unaware of the many people who are glaring at you because of your awful whistling

it’s when you get a (very rude) ’shh!’ that you raise a hand in defence and stop the whistling

it’s too quiET in here the whistling was necessary

these ungrateful assholes should be thankful

“hi there! can i help you with something?” you jump ten feet into the air from the voice that breaks the silence

you turn around and there’s this this tall ass tree of a guy standing behind the counter

he smiles at you and you immediately notice his sweet smile and cute dimples

he tilts his head before reaching up to adjust his glasses

“um, i…” he looks down and his eyes light up when he sees his poster in your hand

“oh, y/n! i didn’t know you were interested in working at the library” huh

he knows your name?

how does he know you

…do you know him?

well you have to know him otherwise how does he know your name

he pushes his glasses up and waits for you to respond

you decide to play along with it for the sake of a good first impression

or..,.,. good second impression??

you’re tempted to tell him you’re only doing this because you have no choice and also you’re failing your classes but he probably doesn’t want to hear all of that

“yeah! a little extra credit never hurts” you laugh and scratch the back of your neck “it’s nice to see you… again…?” you trail off because obviously you have no idea what his name is

you’re still confused as to how he knows your name

he kind of blinks at you and his eyebrows knit together in confusion before he’s like oOh okay i see what’s happening here

“i, uh, i’m namjoon, ha. i’m actually- we were in the same philosophy lecture last year. you… you bumped into me on the first day of class and spilt your coffee all over me.” namjoon chuckles awkwardly and scratches the back of his neck

oh yiKES

your cheeks flame up immediately and you press your lips together

good first impression!!!!1!1!

“oh! oh, right! yeah, of course i remember you, joonie!” the nickname slips out to try and soothe the awkward situation but you don’t think it’s working that well “i’m sorry about that, by the way. you know how klutzy i am” you clear your throat

namjoon chuckles awkwardly and scratches the back of his head

and then u remember an important detail

you raise a brow

“wait but like didn’t you graduate last year? you’re older than me aren’t you?”

“yes, i graduated last year. and yes, I’m older than you”

“….so why r u still here”

“i like it here! it’s as simple as that” namjoon shrugs and you hum in response

personally speaking

once you graduate (if u even graduate lol roasted) there is no turning back

you don’t want to come back here

you wasted four years in this torturous hell why would you willingly come back

but now that he reminded you that you two were in the same philosophy lecture it’s kind of coming back to you

you’ve seen his face like once or twice

he always sat in the front and always raised his hands to answer questions or remind the professor of assignments and oHhH right kim naMjOon

sometimes you and kook poke fun at him because like he’s genuinely suCh a n3rd and a dork aNd a try hard anD he always corrected people over the most minuscule mistakes and he’s a neat freak and wow you are suddenly realising you’re not a huge fan of namjoon

“please, i prefer namjoon.” namjoon clears his throat before setting the pile of books down on the counter “so… you wanna start working here? become the ~junior librarian~?” he sticks his hands out and does some jazz hands and you resist the urge to roll your eyes because woW that was lame

“yep, i need the extra credit” you shrug and lean against the counter

“why do you need extra credit?”

“i don’t think that’s any of your business, namjoon.” you tilt your head and namjoon’s like alright fair enough

“look. it’s pretty obvious you need some help around here.” you gesture to the cart stacked with like a trillion books sitting by the desk “and no one else has applied to help out according to your sad poster- i’m pretty much your only option, bro” you shrug as if to say ‘it’s not my fault’

okay

namjoon definitely doesn’t appreciate the tone and the attitude that you’re giving him

but you’re not wrong

surprisingly not a lot of people have come up to him wanting the job as the junior librarian

it’s kind of disappointing

being a librarian is so much fun!!!!!!

who wouldn’t want to be surrounded by books all day????

and no offence

but he doesn’t really want to give you this job because you’re just so,,., snooty and kinda rude

and you seem like you don’t care about anything

aNd you seem kinda disorganised

he’s just getting that ~vibe~ from you

but he doesn’t have a choice because he does really need the help and you need the extra credit so it works out for both of u

and he’s mature enough to work well with someone he doesn’t like so he’s sure he’ll be fine

namjoon purses his lips and exhales

“fine… i suppose i can let you work alongside me. but just to let you, i have a system for everything, so i would really appreciate if you followed the rules that i set in place and-“ you keep staring at him but you’ve drowned him out and you’re just singing a song in your head

“do you understand?” he finishes and adjusts his glasses before giving you a pointed look

“ya man i gotcha” you click your tongue before pushing yourself off the counter and clapping your hands together “so chief where do i start” you take your backpack off and swiNG it over the counter and it fLOps to the ground loudly

namjoon’s eye twitches when your books spill out of your bag and you don’t bother picking it up

okay

what’s a job that’ll take a while and will require you to be awaY from him

namjoon disappears behind the counter for a split second before reappearing with a duster and a rag

“those shelves over there need to be dusted.”

you raise your brows in disbelief

dusting

is that it

wow

easy frickin peASY ladies and gents

“at least try and make it hard for me.” you snort and snatch the duster and rag from him

extra credit - here we come! goodbye suMMER scHOOL

“see, i told you it wasn’t going to be bad!” jimin points out after you finish fleXing to him about how good of a dust job you did on those bookshelves

weird flex but ok lol

“i know!! i don’t actually mind the library, now that i think about it. the dead silence is kinda relaxing. but-“ you raise a finger “i’m not sure about that namjoon guy”

“namjoon?”

“he’s the librarian. he graduated last year and- god, he’s just… he’s such a nerd. which isn’t a bad thing, i guess? you know what i’m saying, right? he’s just,,,, i don’t know… he seems like the kinda guy who’d get a heart attack from breaking a tinY rule or something,, or i feel like if i drop a book he’ll start crying like he’s thAt kind of person”

jimin nods understandably before shrugging “i get it… but i’m sure if you give him a chance you’ll warm up and you’ll get along!! even if you don’t get along just keep it mind that you’re only doing this for a couple of months.”

“yeah, i guess.”

jimin’s usually right so you’ll take his word for it

maybe namjoon isn’t as much of a stick in the mud as you think he is

you’ll be fine

remember how in the beginning of all of this you were like this is going to be easy-peasy-lemon-squeezy

well

it’s not

it’s not easy-peasy-lemon-squeezy

in fact it’s difficult-difficult-orange-difficult

why are there so many books here???????? it’s never ending!! every time you put one away like ten more appear on the counter and then namjoon’s like mmMm c’mon pick up the pace there’s a lot to do around here

you haven’t even had a chance to sit down for a minute because the library is huGe and you have to walk everywhere to make sure each book is in the right place and no books are overdue and if books aRe overdue to have to go and harass the person that still has the book and the point is THIS IS HARD AND YOU ARE TIRED

no wonder no one wanted this job!!!!!!!!! it’s hard work!!!!!!!!!!

you can’t help but wonder if that water girl job is still available but the thought of having to talk to someone like min yoongi makes you nervous so you shake the thought out of your head

aLSO

namjoon is boring

SO boring

what kind of modern young man willingly wears sweaters and cardigans and button up shirts all the damn time

also?? he keeps candies in his pockets

like he’ll be sorting through some files and then stops and he rifles through his pockets and pulls out a hard candy and pops it into his mouth

they’re those salted caramel hard candies and you’ve been tempted to ask him for one but.,,.,., u don’t want any of his damn pANT candy

also he’s so quiet and you’re very chatty so that’s another thing to add to the list of things you hate about kim namjoon

whenever you try to talk about your day he replies with mm’s and ah’s but never does anything to continue the conversation so you’re left in awkward silence waiting for a reaction

aLSO he has egg salad or tuna or plain turkey sandwiches and like vegetable soup and a piece of fruit (he literally said an apple a day keeps the doctor away one time and you were like what century are you living in???) for lunch most of the time and it sTANKS it’s awful

and when you try to crack a joke he never gets the punchline which is infuriating because you like to think that you’re somewhat of a funny person

aren’t you??????

all he gives you is a polite laugh and a nod before he goes back to his book

you don’t know how long you can keep doing this

it’s been a month and a bit since you started working at the library

and namjoon would rather give himself a trillion paper cuts than work with you

you

are

awful

“y/n - you’re supposed to stamp the first page in the book - not the coVer of the book.” namjoon presses his lips together to keep himself from screaming when he sees you with a mountain of already wrONGLY stamped books

“oh. can’t you like erase the ink or something?”

“no you can’t- you can’t just erasE the ink the stamp is gonna be there forever”

“it’s okay i only stamped like 20 books” you shrug and instinctively stamp the book in your hands “…21 books”

“y/n whY… why did you use a glittery pink pen for the book record sheets”

“it makes it pretty! it’s not a big deal no one sees these sheets besides you and i” you grin and take the sheet from namjoon and he feels his soul die a little when you scribble something down with a neon green marker

also you keep giving yourself little breaks?? and the only breAK that is allowed on your schedule is your lunch break or the occasional washroom break whenever you need it

but you give yourself these nonexistent breaks

‘granola bar break’ - you take 30 minutes off to eat one single granola bar

‘texting break’ - this one’s worse because it happens more frequently like the two of you will be filing things together and namjoon likes to keep things working like a well-oiled machine but it’s hard to do that when you keep pausing to text someone and then you’re like okay where were we like it ruINS THE FLOW

‘reading break’ - THIS is awful because namjoon will see you study and he’ll be like okay at least she’s doing something educational and he peeks over and you’ve literally got your phone out scrolling through memes on instagram

and when he reprimands you for taking too many breaks you always wave him off and tell him to relax and to not get his panties in a twist

he feels like you’re doing this on purpose

pushing his buttons

getting under his skin in the worst way possible

also you keep calling him random names and he hATES IT he just wants to be called namjoon because that’s his name

“hey joon”

“namjoon”

“good morning joonie”

“namjoon”

“hi joonathan”

“joona- namjoon!”

“whaddup dimples”

“hey bookworm”

“hey nerd”

“what’s up four-eyes”

“yo yo yo dork”

“oi egghead where’d i put my phone”

“it’s namjoon - and feet off the counter” it’s almost automatic at this point when namjoon shoVes your legs off the counter and you nearly fall off your chair from the force

he gives you a warning look when you move to put your feet back up and you huff grumpily

“no messy foods in the library” you gawk when namjoon picks up your takeaway box of spaghetti and proceeds to dump it into the bin

“don’t use the books as coasters” namjoon snatches your drink and picks up the book then wipes the condensation from your drink off the front cover

“no more texting during work hours” your phone disappears from your hands and you blink down at your fingers because that was sO speedy

“oH my god am i even allowed to breathe in here???” you snap exasperatedly because you and jimin were talking about how kook slipped in the cafeteria and got banana milk all over tae’s new shoes and taheyung freAKED it was hilarious

namjoon blinks down at you before opening up a drawer and dropping your phone in there before proceeding to l o c k the drawer

are you KIDDING me

is this bitch for real???? he just locked up your phone???????

“i don’t know. your breathing is kind of loud, so we’ll have to figure out a way around that issue.” and with that he turns his back with a huff but not before turning to face you one last time so he can look you right in the eye as he drops your can of soda into the bin

it’s pretty obvious that you and namjoon most certainly do not like each other but the both of you are just being very passive aggressive and tip-toeing around the elephant in the library

you let out a breath and dig your nails into your palm

deep breaths deep breaths

we’re doing this to graduate

we can do this

aight

no biggie

remember how you promised yourself you’d be more responsible when it came to your work load

obviously you forgot about that promise

because you have a final in a week and a half that you completely forgot about that even frickin jungkook was aware about

and now you have to jam a whole semester’s worth of information into your head and finish that 12 page paper for your history class and work on your presentation for your film class and there’s just so much that you have to do and you don’t have enough time to do everything

you decided to skip your last lecture of the day (you asked tae to take notes for you and he’s usually good at that so you’re not worried) to come to the library and study

and you couldn’t find an empty table or anything so you figured you’d just study at the desk

you’re surprised to see that namjoon isn’t around because he practically lives at the library

okay it’s whatever

he’d probably distract you anyway

you plop yourself down on the chair and proceed to pull out all your notes and books and markers and you dump it all on the table

you crack your knuckles and look down at the mountain in front of you

let’s do this

namjoon hums a tune to himself as he opens the door and enters the library

he’s in an especially good mood today for some reason

the smile falters on his face when he realises that he’s going to be spending the rest of the day with you and that’s definitely going to soil his mood

ugh

you’re usually late because you always come after your classes so he expects that he’ll be in a good mood for about twenty more minutes or so

namjoon pauses when he sees the top of your head poking out from behind the front counter

you’re

on time?

he looks at his watch

no you’re not just on time

you’re… early

you’ve never been early to a shift before

how odd

maybe someone finally lit a fire under your ass and you’re finally being more responsible!!

okay

he’s still in a good mood

he’s about to give you a chirpy greeting (and this time he’s not going to correct you if you address him using another one of your lame nicknames) and then he’s suddenly aware of the scene in front of his eyes

“y/n?” namjoon furrows his brows to see you with your face buried in your arms and you’re surrounded by like teN textbooks and a lot of scrap paper with random notes scribbled on them and a million highlighters and pens “…whatcha up to?”

you don’t respond and he leans over the counter a little more

…are you even alive

suddenly you look up at namjoon

he takes a step back in surprise at the sight of your red and watery eyes and he’s like o shit she crying

“are you okay??” he unlocks the gate and steps behind the front counter to join you

“i don’t know anything, namjoon. i literally don’t know anything and my final is in a week and a half.” you sniffle and reach up to wipe your tears away

“oh god. i’m going to fail this exam and this is totally going to put my life on hold and everyone’s going to graduate before me and i’ll be stuck here because of how stupid i am” you sob and slam a textbook shut and namjoon jumps

he’s never seen you like this before

he’s never seen you so… defeated

usually you’re all smiles and you have a smartass comment ready to go at all times and even when he shuts you down you don’t let that stop you

so for the first time ever

when he sees you with puffy eyes and a trembling bottom lip and a permanent frown on your face

he feels… bad

and you called him namjoon

not joon or dimples or bookworm

namjoon

this is serious

even though you piss him off everyday because of how irritating you are

you don’t deserve to be this sad

namjoon sets his briefcase down before pulling his chair over and sitting down next to you

he looks over at all the textbooks briefly before looking up at you “what are you studying?” he hands you the box of tissues that are on his side of the desk and you thank him quietly before sniffling and wiping the tear that’s trailing down your cheek

“um, philosophy.” you sound kind of nasally from how much crying you’ve done but whatever “right now i’m looking at the main branches of philosophy but i just don’t geT it.”

“okay, well…” namjoon glances at your handwritten notes for a second and all you’ve written down is ‘philosophy notes’ with a bright purple marker

oh god

is he really going to do this

is he really going to help you right now

because he could totally just tell you to put your notes away and do your job

but instead he’s deciding that he’s going to help you study for your finals

even though you’ve been nothing but an obnoxious piece of shIT for the past two months

he’s going to help you whether you like it or not

“let’s start off with differentiating between the branches. typically, there are four branches. sometimes there are five, but for philosophy301 you just focus on four. logic, epistemology, metaphysics, and-“

“what are you doing?” you interrupt namjoon and look at him confusedly

he’s

he’s helping you?

what?

why??

whY?????

“i’m… explaining the four branches of philosophy. at least i’m trying to. what’s wrong?” he tilts his head and blinks twice “oh, you know what, maybe i shouldn’t… because i can’t focus if your study station is a pig sty.” he starts cleaning up your papers and putting your highlighters back into your pencil case

he pauses in the middle of stacking your textbooks to look at you “don’t just stare at me - clean up! and then we’ll get on with it.”

“namjoon, you don’t have to-“

“y/n, i swear to god.” namjoon groans quietly and taps the top of your head with a pen “stop being so stubborn and just be a good girl.”

you raise your hands in defence

you can’t help the little smile that twitches at the corner of your mouth

namjoon’s helping you

…you knew he had a soft spot for u

(little do you know that you have a soft spot for him too)

>:-)

namjoon spends the next two and a half hours explaining many different philosophical concepts to you and he answers every single one of your questions

at one point you get a little shy because you feel like your questions are dumb but namjoon reassures you that your questions are most certainly not dumb

he even paused to tell you a story of how in one of his classes he raised his hand and forgot what he was going to ask by the time the prof got to him so he ended up asking the prof ‘what class is this?’

that made you crack uP because you can imagine namjoon’s flushed cheeks and nervous stammer so clearly

also namjoon shared his lunch with you which was a surprise (today he brought in a turkey sandwich and an apple)

“my favourite sandwich is actually turkey on whole wheat with spicy mustard - and my favourite kind of apple is honey crisp!”

“spicy mustard is too much flavour for me. i just like putting mayo. and i’m a red apple kinda guy.”

“you’re boring” you tease him as you bite into the sandwich

“am not! don’t attack me for liking the plainer things in life!”

even though the ingredients are pretty plain somehow it still works and you find yourself scarfing it down in like thirty seconds

namjoon pulls a hard candy out of his pocket and offers it to you

“you’re giving me one of your precious candies??” you gasp and pluck it so delicately from his fingers as if it were made of glass or something

“it’s only because i feel bad for you because you criEd so don’t expect anymore candies from me” namjoon snorts and bites into an apple slice “also i always see you staring at me whenever i pull out a candy”

“it’s only because i’m wondering if they’re stale or not” you unwrap it and pop it into your mouth quickly before namjoon can take it back

“they most certainly are not!” he gasps in mock offence before reaching up to adjust his glasses

“your glasses are just as dorky as you” you reach over and brush your fingers over the thick rims and namjoon scowls before smacking your hand away

“don’t make me regret helping you and sharing my food with you” he points an accusatory finger in your direction and you grin cheekily “now, c’mon - let’s talk about famous philosophers and then we’ll start making some flash cards!”

“i like flash cards!!! ooh we can use my mArkERs-“ you start rambling excitedly about your multicoloured markers and namjoon finds himself smiling fondly as he watches you rummage through your pencil case

maybe you’re not so bad after all

“yES you got it again! alright who do we have next…” namjoon shuffles through the pile of flashcards on his lap

“okay-“ he pauses to read the notes on the back of the flashcard before holding it up for you “who is saint thomas aquinas?”

“ooh, i know this one!!” you raise your hand even though you’re the onLY One stuDYING

you’re so lame

endearingly lame

:~)

“hm, any takers?” namjoon plays along and pretends to look around a classroom of people before pointing at you “ah! yes, miss y/l/n?”

he’s just as lame as you are

you clear your throat and sit up straighter

“saint thomas aquinas was a 13th century dominican friar, theologian and doctor of the church, born in what is known today as the lazio region of italy.”

“okay, and what did he do?”

“uh, his most important contribution to western thought is the concept of natural theology! …right?”

“mm, go on” namjoon leans back against his chair and plucks at his bottom lip as he skims over the notes on the back of the card again

“he… adhered to the platonic and aristotelian principle of realism, which holds that certain absolutes exist in the universe, including the existence of the universe itself…?”

namjoon puts the card down and stares at you and ur like o shit am i wrong

a smile creeps onto his face and he raises his fist for you to bump “you got it!”

“yAY” you give him a fist bump and apologise quietly when you hear someone in the distance go ‘shh!!!!!’

they’ve shushed you like five times in the last hour

whoops

both you and namjoon exchange glances before bursting into giggles

“uGHhgH namJOoON” you groan and slump against the table as you twirl your pencil between your fingers

today’s been a pretty slow day

wednesdays are your longest days because you have classes from 9 to 6

and now you’re at the library and namjoon is forcing you to study even though you’re like hey let’s rearrange books or something!!!! let me do my job!!!!

“no complaining! now sit up straight and listen to me.”

you ignore him and continue twirling your pencil around

“y/n. sit up and listen.” he sighs and raises an eyebrow

you curse to yourself quietly before forcing yourself to sit up but you slump against the chair as if your bones were made of jelly

okay

well

better than nothing

“okay, let me tell you about the gemeinschaft-gesellschaft dichotomy. it was proposed by tönnies as a purely conceptual tool rather than an ideal type in the way it was used by max weber to accentuate the key elements of a historic or social change. got it?”

you give namjoon a pointed look before huffing “no”

namjoon lets out a slow sigh and looks through his notes again

meanwhile you’re spinning around and around on your wheely chair

namjoon’s hand shoots out and grips onto the arm of your chair to stop you “how about we take a break?”

“yEs i love that! now that i understand.” you stretch your limbs out but quickly curl up when your stomach rumbles

huh

you forgot that you didn’t get a chance to eat lunch today

namjoon clears his throat

“i actually,.., um, i brought you some food today!” namjoon turns and grabs the paper bag sitting on his desk

you raise a brow

“you did?”

that’s a surprise

that’s actually really nice of him

“you’ve been working and studying pretty hard lately so i thought i’d treat you to lunch! turkey on whole wheat with spicy mustard.” namjoon clears his throat and hands you the bag before reaching up to scratch the back of his neck “and also a honey crisp apple… and two caramel candies.”

he remembered your favourite kind of sandwich and your favourite kind of apple

which means he went out of his way to buy ingredients that he would usually stay the heck away from

that’s… that’s kind of sweet actually

“you remembered what i like?” you reach into the bag and pull out the neatly wrapped sandwich

“the, uh, the dorky glasses make me more observant” namjoon taps the frames gently and you laugh

“look, i didn’t mean- like, dorky isn’t necessarily a bad thing i just- it’s cute! you’re cute” you flush immediately wOw what is wrong with you

you clear your throat “your glasses are cute. your glasses.” you murmur

both you and namjoon avoid gazes and you don’t realise it but both your faces are on fire

namjoon twiddles with his thumbs and bites back his smile

you’re about to take a bite of your sandwich before you realise he’S not eating anything “hey, where’s your food?”

“oH, right” namjoon twists back and grabs his paper bag

“lemme guess - turkey on white with mayo with a red apple.”

“ah, nice guess, but i’m afraid you’ve been mistaken” namjoon tsks and shakes his head “it’s tuna sandwich tuesday!! and i brought a pear!”

you snort and roll your eyes playfully

only namjoon would have a tuna sandwich tuesday

“i believe that’s another point to me” namjoon leans back against his chair proudly after he makes yet anotHer paper ball dunk into the waste bin

you convinced him to take a lil break since you’ve been studying for an hour and a half and your brain is about to explode

and today you’re the one who brought lunch for him

you bought soup from the cafeteria!! luckily they made his favourite today!! chicken soup

he got so excited when you presented the little take-out bowl to him

he even offered you a spoonful and at first you were like nah but he said look the cafe’s chicken soup is AMAzing you will not regret this

he blew over it to cool it down first before feeding it to you and you were like o shit ur right this is good

he ended up feeding you a couple more spoonfuls as you looked over your notes

it was kinda cute but whateva

so it’s kind of that after-lunch lull where your tummies are full and you’re feeling lazy

which is why you and namjoon are competing in paper-ball

and namjoon is winning which is very surprising

whenever you play paper-ball with jimin you’re always in the lead so you’re not used to thIS

you’re realising now that you might be a bit of a sore loser

“it’s getting hot in here - it must be because i’m on fire.” namjoon smirks as he adds another dash under his name

“lame” you roll your eyes as you crush up another paper ball

“okay but seriously i’m like sweating” namjoon sits up and peels his sweater-vest off before unbuttoning a couple buttons on his shirt and rolling his sleeves up neatly

your eyes flicker over to his now exposed forearms

he has.,.., really sexy arms.,,.. what the hell,.,,

namjoon wheels a little closer to you until his knee is in between your legs “here lemme do it because your paper-balls all sucK” namjoon takes the ball from your hand and you feel a lil ziPzaP when his fingers brush over yours

what the hell x2.,.,.,., his hANDS.,.,.,., even his hANDS ARE SEXY

“what’s the matter with you? where’s the witty retort?” you look up from his hands quickly and namjoon’s grinning at you in a way that makes your heart skip a beat

.,.. EVEN HIS TEETH ARE PERFECT???

omg

what’s happening to you

you look away quickly and try to snap yourself out of it

what the fuck

what the fuck is happening

what’s going on with your body

why are your hands clammy

why is your heart racing like this

why do you want him to scoot evEN closer

you like namjoon

oh no

you like namjoon

oh NO sweetie you do NOT like kim namjoon

yes you do

no you don’t

mmmmmyes you do

NO you don’t you can’t like namjoon!!! he’s the worst!

he’s the best and you love him

he wears stupid sweater vests!!

he can pull it off tho and also his button-up is kind of thin today and you can see very faint outlines of his abs and it makes you want to run your hands over his bronzey smooth skin you LOVe it you perv

“y/n? you okay?” namjoon taps your knee gently and raises a brow when you jumP in your seat

“i’m good! i’m just…” you snatch the paper ball from his grasp and point to the waste bin “i’m just getting my heaD in the game because i’m going to kick your ass”

namjoon laughs before gesturing for you to throw “i’d like to see you try.” he leans back against his chair and crosses his arms

frick

even THAt was sexy

you are losing your mind

you like kim namjoon

“good morning!” namjoon plops down next to you and you let out a little yawn as a good morning “today’s the big day~” he wiggles his brows “you ready?”

you look down at your flashcards and your notes and give a little shrug

you think you’re ready?? maybe

“i guess so??” you murmur and stretch your limbs out

you decided to come to the library before your 8AM exam because.,,,.., uh.,,,.,

okay you just wanted to see namjoon so WHAT

“i have something for you-“ namjoon rummages through his bag before pulling out a bracelet looking thing

a bunch of different shades of purple threads braided together neatly

she looks a little worn out but she still cute

“this was my good luck bracelet when i was doing exams during my last year - i thought maybe you’d want to wear it or something? you don’t have to, obviously, but i know how nervous you are and… yeah, i don’t know… i just wanted to give it to you i guess“

there it is again

your heart just went boom-boom for joon-joon

you press your lips together to hold back a dorky smile before you stick your hand out for namjoon “i need all the luck i can get”

namjoon smiles and shakes his head as he ties the bracelet around your wrist carefully “you don’t need any luck. i believe in you!” he glances at the clock hanging behind you on the wall “you better get going - it’s 7:42.”

you let out a little sigh before getting up off the seat and grabbing your pencil case and your water bottle

namjoon looks up at you with a small smile “i’ll see you after your exam?” he watches as you open the little gate to step out

“if i survive, that is” you retort and namjoon rolls his eyes

you’re about to walk out but you turn around swiftly “namjoon?”

namjoon looks up at you “mm?”

“thank you… for everything.” you murmur shyly while twisting the bracelet around your wrist “you’re… not bad. not bad at all.”

you don’t really know what to saY but all you know is that you’re super appreciative and grateful to have someone like namjoon,,, care about you

and you’re already not good with emotional things so ‘you’re not bad at all’ is a pretty big thing to say in your opinion!!!

lucky for you

namjoon fully understands

namjoon’s cheeks flush slightly and he shakes his head “get outta here you sappy loser”

he lets out a breath he didn’t even know he was holding once you leave the library

and now that he has this moment alone

a realisation begins to creep into his mind

he likes you

well it’s pretty obvious at this point

things that used to irritate him about you are now endearing

he makes lunch for you willingly

he doesn’t flinch or move away when you initiate contact

he actually pays attention to your lame jokes

he gave you his good luck bracelet for god’s sakes

he likes you

you’ve been on edge for the whole day

this morning you got your philosophy final exam back

for a whole week this exam was on your mind and now it’s finally back in your hands and you can’t even bring yourself to look at your grade

because you’re terrified

you’re terrified that you failed yet another exam and you’ll have to graduate a year behind all of your friends and you’ll have to put your life on hold because you were a dumbass in university

and you’re terrified that you disappointed jin and jimin and namjoon

you don’t want to disappoint namjoon

but your exam has been burning a hole in your backpack and you figure that it’s now or never

“oh pleasepleaseplease” you whisper to yourself as your trembling fingers gently pull the crinkled, folded up piece of paper from your backpack

okay

hoo

okay

no need to panic

it’s just your philosophy final that you had to get at least a 90% on to make up for the rest of your shitty grades in that course

you pinch the corner of the page getting ready to flip it open

you take your bottom lip in between your teeth nervously

you squeeze your eyes shut

it’s now or never

you unfold it in one smooth motion and the paper makes a thwacking sound as you do so

you peel an eye open

you peel the other eye open

and the blood drains from your face

namjoon’s in the middle of putting books back onto the shelves

it’s the end of the day and there aren’t a lot of people around so it’s nice and quiet

namjoon likes these nice and quiet days

it’s just him and the books

him and his library

and then he hears something

frantic footsteps slapping against the floor in the distance

huh

someone must be in a rush

he furrows his brows when the footsteps get louder

and he whips around to look at the entrance of the library with narrowed eyes

…

bAM

he yelps in fear when the doors suddenly buRST open and a manic-looking you appears with wide eyes and a huGe (slightly terrifying) grin

you look around the library before you lock gazes with namjoon and if it’s even possible your smile grows wider

oh good god

you look like what’d he’d see in the corner of his room if he ever got sleep paralysis

“what-“

“yoU BEAUTIFUL TREE OF A MAN I LOVE YOU” the next thing namjoon knows you’re leaping into his arms and he quickly grips under your thighs instinctively so that you don’t fall flat on your ass

he stumbles backwards a little and his fingers dig into the flesh of your thighs as you smoosh kisses all over his face

he’s certainly not complaining but whAt the hell is going on

you drop back down onto your feet and you unravel your arms around namjoon’s neck and throw your hands up in the air “i goT 98% ON MY EXAM” you squeal excitedly before wrapping your arms around his neck in a hug and bouncing up and down and oHHH now he sees why you’re acting like a psychopath

“see!!!! i told you you could do it i’m sO ProuD of you!!!!!!!” namjoon grins and wraps his arms around your waist and twirls you around in a circle “98% is so good!!!!!”

“i know!! i never get a 98% on anything!!!” you giggle and pull away from the crook of his neck

your arms are still wrapped around his neck and his arms are still wrapped around your waist

your breathing slows down a bit as you start to calm down and

your faces are very very close

and suddenly

you feel this overwhelming urge to kiss namjoon

you want him to kiss you

namjoon’s eyes flicker down to your lips and you feel your heart pounding in your chest

it’s going to happen

he’s going to kiss you

you’re disappointed when he quickly takes a step back and pulls away from you

you clear your throat and smooth your skirt down and namjoon adjusts his wonky glasses

both of your guys’ faces are on fire

“anyways - 98% is really good! aim for 99% next time.” namjoon teases and turns around to look at his book cart again and the moment he turns away from u he mouths a ‘wHAT THE FUCK’ to himself because WHAT THE FUCK

meanwhile your face is on fire because that was deFINTEly something

you guys had a moment

does this mean namjoon likes you back

omg

doES IT?????

“joon” you approach him and tap his shoulder gently before standing next to him

“mhm?” he glances at you briefly before looking back at the books on the cart

you get up on your tiptoes and plant a little smooch on his cheek and namjoon freezes immediately

“is there anything for me to do?” you ask casually as if you didn’t just kiSS HIS CHEEK

“u-uh-“

“oh shoot you know what i was organising the thriller novels before my exam and i never finished doing that! let me go do that now and then you can give me something else to do” you disappear in between the shelves and namjoon blinks owlishly

he reaches up and brushes his fingers over his hot cheek

and the FATTEST smile appears on his face

today’s been kind of a slow day

namjoon texted you earlier and said he’d be in late today

so here you are

sitting behind the front counter

alone

well, not exactly

lisa, wendy and jisoo came to keep you company even though you insisted you were fine

they texted and asked if you wanted to grab some lunch and when you didn’t respond they all came to ambush you at the library

“yeah, sure! as soon as namjoon gets here we can go get some food.” you smile politely before looking back down at the computer

these girls,,, well they’re not your frieNds exactly

they’re in a couple of your classes

let’s just say they’re a whole lot more popular than you think you’ll ever be

they’ve taken a liking to you for some reason and you don’t mind because the more the merrier!! also it’s kinda cool because in high school you were never really friends with the ‘’’’’cool gals’’’’’’ so there’s that too

also you think another reason why they hang around you is because you’re friends with guys like jimin and jungkook and you don’t want to be that person but like..,,. YEaH ur boy-friends are really attractive so it makes sense to go through you to get to them (spoiler alert jimin and jungkook do not like any single one of these girls but you don’t have the heart to break the news to them)

“namjoon… why does that name sound so familiar” lisa furrows her brows and leans against the counter

“remember? he was that guy in our philosophy lecture last year - the one who sat at the front? he graduated last year” you hum and scribble something down

“oh shit, i remember!!!” lisa gasps “…oh god, he was awful. such a try-hard”

wait what

your head pops up and you furrow your brows “well like he’s not a try-hard he’s just passionate about-“

“i hated him. he kept reminding the prof to give us pop quizzes” wendy shudders

“i bet he’s still a virgin”

“who cares if he-“

“i bet he hasn’t had his first kiss yet”

“we can’t just assume that he hasn’t just because he-“

“yeah, i wouldn’t be surprised” jisoo snorts “who the hell would wanna kiss someone who looks like that?”

what the hell

what kind of assholey thing was that to say??

“…what?”

“oh, c’mon, y/n. the sweater vests. the pervert glasses.”

“he’s tall and gangly. no meat on his bones??”

“i could never even imagine dating a loser like that!”

and suddenly you remember why you don’t like these girls

namjoon is in a very vEry good mood today

and now he gets to spend the rest of the day with you so he’s teN times happier!!!!!!!

plus he brought lunch for you again because he knows that sometimes you neglect your stomach and he can’t have that (and as cute as your stomach rumbles are he wants to make sure you’re eating and not skipping lunch just because you’re too lazy to line up)

he hopes you like the sandwich

he cut it into the shape of a heart just because he thought it was kinda cute

and uh

the heart-sandwich kind of emphasises the fact that he likes you a lot

ALSO

he picked out a bunch of little daisies from the ground on his way here

and he tied them together in a little bouquet using a blade of grass

very rustic looking bouquet but still adorable!!

he looked like a madman yanKIng all the daisies out of the ground but u know what he’s embracing it because he’s a fool in LOVe

he accidentally stepped on a couple daisies and was like yikes

and he has a couple specks of dirt on his shirt but he’ll deal with it later

anyways

today’s the day he’s going to tell you that he likes you ~romantically~ and he’s going to ask if you wanna grab dinner after you guys leave the library tonight

he even made reservations at this cute cafe he hopes you’ll like

and he’s dressed extra spiffy today

his hair is swept back neatly and he even used a lil more gel to keep every strand in place

there’s not one speck of dust on his glasses lens

he ironed his tie and his button-up

and he’s wearing a brand new expensive cologne

all for you!!!!!! because you are woRth it

his heart skips a bit at the mere thought of your smile and that adorable giggle and the way your nose crinkles when he scolds you playfully

frick he likes u sO MCUH

he decides to take the back door today

just because the romance books are on the shelves in the back and he’s in a romantic mood and wants to pick out a book for you to read

he’s thinking Jane Austen’s ‘Persuasion’ is a good one

namjoon’s finger brushes over the spines of the books on the shelves as he looks for it

he perks up when he finds it

perfect!!!!!!!

he tucks the book under his arm and adjusts his book bag on his shoulder and triple checks that he has everything

sandwich? check

new book?? got it

flowers???? yEs

say it with me now: hoTEL?trivAGo

he hears the murmuring of some voices as he nears the front and he freezes when he hears his name float through the air

hm?

he pokes his head out from around the corner and sees you and a couple of who he can safely assume are your girl friends because they’re all giggling about something

namjoon furrows his brows and stays hidden behind a bookshelf

a little eavesdropping never hurts nobody

“you would never go out with someone like namjoon, right? i know i wouldn’t” lisa taps the top of your head to get your attention “not even if we were the last people on earth”

“yeah, i don’t think i would either” you reply automatically because if you said yEs i’d go for namjoon (and u totally would) you’d never hear the end of it

((but at the same time who cares about what these girls think?? they’re not ur real friends))

you don’t want to go out with them anymore

as soon as this conversation ends you’re kicking these assholes the heck out of the library

but you can’t kick them out without saying something nice about namjoon because ?? namjoon is one of the sweetest guys ever and they need to be aware of that

“but without him i wouldn’t have passed my exam so i have to give him some credit for that” you point out and hope that they’ll cut him some slack

wendy leans against the counter and gasps

“oh, i love that, you cold-hearted bitch!!! taking advantage of the smarty-pants virginey loser to pass your exams?? geniuS”

okay

that didn’t exactly work out

“you would never go out with someone like namjoon, right? i know i wouldn’t”

“yeah, i don’t think i would either”

…

…what?

namjoon deflates and he feels his heart clench in his chest

his fingers tighten around the paper bag and he takes a small step back

frick

he knew this day was going too well

you…

you really wouldn’t want to go out with him?

you wouldn’t even give him one chance?

was he really that awful?

“but without him i wouldn’t have passed my exam so i have to give him some credit for that”

“oh, i love that, you cold-hearted bitch!!! taking advantage of the smarty-pants, virginey loser to pass your exams?? geniuS”

namjoon’s eyes flutter shut and he presses his lips together

of course

of coursE this would happen to him

you were the one person that he thought might’ve actually like him back and it turns out you were only using him to pass your exams

how could he not have seen that????

you???? being interested in him?????

i m p o s s i b l e

you don’t go for dorky librarians like him

you go for guys like min yoongi and jeon jungkook and park jimin

well now he just feels stupid

he has a stupid heart shaped sandwich and a stupid honey crisp apple and a stupid packet of animal crackers in this stupid paper bag that has your name on it because he has a stupid crush on you and he really thought you liked him back and he was looking forward to taking you out on a stupid stUPID date

but of course the inevitable happens

you don’t like him… at all.

you used him?

your fingers tighten around the pen and you bite down on your tongue

these girls are getting on your nerves now

whatever

you’re kicking them out now you’re done with this

“anyways - as much as i wanna talk about how much of a loser kim namjoon is,” you say sarcastically and make air quotes “i think i have some work to do so i’m going to have to put a rain check on-“

you jump when you hear the sound of some books toppling off the shelf and everyone immediately looks at the source of the sound

you stand up and peek over the girls’ shoulders

and the blood immediately drains from your face

“n-namjoon?”

oh,,,., god

oh no no nO

did he hear everything you said??

namjoon doesn’t think it’s possible for his heart to break even more

but then

“anyways - as much as i wanna talk about how much of a loser kim namjoon is, i think i have some work to do so i’m going to have to put…”

ouch

okay

big yikes

this did not go according to plan at all

maybe he should head out the back door and then come in through the front door and just act like everything is normal

yes

that’s a good plan

namjoon turns around to leave but he stumbles over his feet a little and his hands reach out to grip onto the bookshelf

instead what happens is he shoves a couple books riGHt off the shelf and namjoon curses before automatically dropping to his knees to pick them up

“n-namjoon?”

oh shit

where does he go from hERE

namjoon freezes like a deer in headlights and he swallows thickly before slowly turning to look up at you “u-uh, i-i-“

“hey, look what the cat dragged in!” wendy coos and namjoon feels his heart starting to race in his chest when the girls approach him “what do we have here, hm?”

before he has the chance to pick up the paper bag jisoo snAtches it from the ground

“oh, y/n! it’s for you!” she unrolls the top and reaches it before pulling out the sandwich

she coos before pushing her bottom lip out in a mocking pout “aw, isn’t that cute? a wittle heart shaped sandwich for y/n!” her eyes flicker down to the bouquet of daisies that have now been tramPled on “and a bouquet of weeds!! ever the romantic, aren’t you??”

namjoon feels his entire face flush bright red and he’s struggling to put the books back onto the shelf

he’s just doing whatever it takes to avoid eye contact with the girls

“you’re looking a little red, namjoon. maybe you should take that cardigan off?” wendy pinches his cheek and namjoon gets off his knees immediately

although he towers over them he knows they’re the ones holding the power in this moment

“what’s the matter? you’re not even going to say hi to y/n??” lisa frowns before gesturing to you

namjoon locks gazes with you and your heart clenches when you’re able to see the pure hurt and pain in his glassy eyes

he looks away from you immediately and bends down to grab his bag

“nam-“ the next thing you know he spRints towards the front door and leaves

all three girls burst into laughter and jisoo tosses the paper bag and the flowers onto the front counter and it lands right in front of you

your heart tightens at the sight of your name scribbled on it with a little heart drawn next to it

you pick up the bouquet of daises and they flop down against your fingers sadly

“…you guys are assholes” you hiss and start packing up your things

“what? y/n, what’s wr-“

“all of you - get out!” you snap and point towards the door as you zip your backpack up frantically

the girls all exchange glances before scoffing and leaving the library

good fucking riddance

you basically leAp over the gate and sprint towards the front door

you’re not technically supposed to leave the library because no one’s at the front desk but you need to find namjoon

jesus

you should’ve said something!!! you should’ve stuck up for joon!!!! why didn’t you???

why didn’t you stick up namjoon who always makes sure you’re drinking enough water and eating enough food and not skipping meals and who always offers to get you a snack whenever he goes to the cafe and is always very patient with you when he’s teaching you something new and is always giving you new books to read

namjoon with his boisterous laugh when you or that shy giggle he does where he covers his mouth and his eyes crinkle

namjoon who makes you feel happy and safe and warm and smart and all the good things in the world

namjoon who makes your heart go boom-boom because of how sweet and caring and wonderful he is

namjoon who has two left feet and has officially tripped his way into your heart

you look like a maniac because you’re sprinting everywhere to try and find namjoon but you seriously don’t know where he is

you’re out of breath and your bag is flopping against your back anD you’re holding onto the daises and the paper bag for dear life

you spend an hour trying to find namjoon

but he’s nowhere to be found

you end up back at the library and you let out a sigh as you shut the gate behind you

it’s the end of the day so there’s nobody around really

the sun is beginning to set

you groan and slam your head against the desk in frustration

you

are

an idiot

congratulations, y/n y/l/n - you fucked up.

“thank you” namjoon smiles at the waitress before sitting up a little straighter and reaching out for the sandwich on his plate

he takes a small bite and his eyes flicker to across the booth where you should be

suddenly he’s not feeling very hungry anymore

he swallows his bite and pushes the plate away before slumping against the booth and looking out the window of the cafe

he curses to himself when he feels a lump growing in his throat

he feels dumb crying over you

he should’ve known you would never go for someone like him

he sniffles and reaches up to dab away the single tear that’s threatening to spill over

namjoon doesn’t come to work the next day

instead you’re met with the sight of some random guy sitting behind the counter

his name is hoseok and he’s all smiles and you’re sure he’s a nice guy but he’s really getting on your nerves right now

and he has the audacity to ask you if you need help with anything

he’s sitting in namjoon’s chair!!!!!!

“sorry- where’s namjoon?” you interrupt his little rant about his day and he blinks at you

“hm? oh! uh, not sure… would you like me to try contacting him for you? if you have a question about how things work around here you can always ask me! i used to work at the library but they told me i talked too much buT here i am again because-”

oh my god this guy is infuriating

namjoon doesn’t come to work the next day

or the next

you’re starting to get worried

you’ve texted him - no response

you’ve called him - no response

you talked to jin and jin told you that you actually have enough extra credit now!! so you’ve been relieved of your librarian duties buT since namjoon isn’t there you can fill in for him til he comes back

“i thought i was supposed to continue working there til the end of the semester? and after the semester ends i’ll get the extra credit?”

“yeah, i thought so too - but i guess you’ve done such a good job that namjoon’s given you extra exTra credit!! good job!!!” jin grins and claps his hands together “goodbye summer school!!!!!! now, listen, let’s not fail our courses so that i don’t have to have this discussion with you again, how about we…”

o god

namjoon doesn’t want you around anymore thAt’s why he gave you the all extra credit immediately

you slump against the seat as jin continues to blab about a study plan for you

what are you doing to do now?

two weeks pass by and you’ve gone to the library every single day in hopes that namjoon will be there

instead you’re met with hoseok’s smiling face

side note: you’ve warmed up to him he’s actually really sweet

but you just

you miss your joonie

so when you walk into the library after a particularly tiring day and see namjoon sitting at the desk instead of hoseok

you’re understandably a little shook

“namjoon?? where have you been????” you gasp and shut the gate behind you “i-i’ve texted and i tried calling you but you-“

“i just needed a break.” namjoon shrugs

there’s an awkward silence between the two of you and you pluck at a loose thread on your sweater

okay

you need to say something

you had something planned out but for some reason you can’t remember what you were going to say

how about you start off with sorry

okay

that’s a good plan

start off with sorry

easy peasy lemon squeezy

you clear your throat and sit down in your chair before scooting closer to namjoon

he doesn’t budge

that’s a good sign.,., right

“hey, uh, look - i’m sorry-“

“it’s fine.” namjoon replies softly and flips to the next page in his book

it’s obviously not

he can’t even look you in the eye

“namjoon, i-“

“i think you should go. people who aren’t librarians aren’t supposed to be behind the desk.” namjoon snaps his book shut before getting up off his seat and walking over to the gate

he holds it open for you

okay

you deserve that

“i just wanted to say that i’m sorry-“

“yeah, i got it. is there anything else i can help you with?”

god

u feel awful

you pluck at the purple bracelet around your wrist nervously

“please, just give me a second to explain-“

“you’ve done plenty of explaining. i get it. i’m not good enough for little miss y/n y/l/n.” namjoon scoffs “message received loud and clear.”

“no, that’s not tru-“

“now if you’ll excuse me, i have some students waiting who actually need help.” namjoon gestures to the line of students before pointing at the gate

you swallow the lump in your throat and you stand up and grab your bag

difficult difficult orange difficult

namjoon feels a twinge of guilt nibbling away at his conscience

it’s been about

five days? since he last saw you

five days since you tried apologising and he didn’t even give you a second to explain yourself which honestly wasn’t fair of him

and he wants to talk to you and stuff but,..,., like.,. he’s never experienced anything like this before and he doesn’t know what to do

are the two of you just going to avoid each other for the rest of your time here

the only time you interact will be when you check out a book at the library which very rarELy happens

he can’t help but wonder when he’ll see you again

the next time he sees you he’s definitely going to say something

and it seems like someone up there is either on his side or really hates him

because there you are

behind the counter

but he hasn’t had a chance to prepare for this situation and whAT IS HE GOING TO SAY TO U

it’s then that he notices that something is off

“y/n? what are you doing here? you don’t work here anymore and… it’s saturday.”

namjoon jumps when you whIP around clutching a bunch of books to your chest

“i put all the returned books away. i stamped all the new books on the first page and not the front cover-“

namjoon can barely pay attention to what you’re saying because you look

well

you looking a little rough girl

there are bags under your bloodshot eyes

your hair is pulled up into a messy bun

there’s a pen stuck through the bun

your reading glasses are tangled in your hair

“i also put the new books into the cataloguing system so you don’t have to spend this weekend doing that anymore!! you can go home and rest if you want!! i-i can take care of it!!”

“how long have you been h-“

“i’ve restrung all the old books that are falling apart! i-i vacuumed behind the desk and i dusted the bookshelves too-“ you gesture wildly to the bookshelves

“y/n - jesus, you look like you’re about to pass out i think you should rest” namjoon rushes behind the counter and grabs onto your shoulders to steady you because you’re starting to sway a little bit

even though he’s still hurt by what happened he’s not going to prioritise thAt before you especially since you don’t look so good right now

also now that a good amount of time has passed he’s slowly starting to get over it

if you don’t like him like that then you don’t like him like that

there’s nothing he can do about it

he just has to accept it

“no namjoon listen to me look i even restocked on those black pens you like so much and i didn’t use my glittery pink pens when i labelled the books!” you sniffle and look up at him with watery eyes before gesturing to the cup of pens

“yes, i see that-“

“i just need you to know how sorry i am, okay?”

“yes, and i’ve forgiven you-“

“no, you haven’t! you haven’t forgiven me and i can see why! if i were in your shoes i wouldn’t forgive me! i’m just an asshole and there’s literally no excuse in the world to defend what i said about you and i feel awful and i’d understand if you never wanna see me again because i would never wanna see me again-“

“-y/n-“

“but you’re literally the sweetest guy i’ve ever met and i like you so sO much and you didn’t have to help me study for my finals and you didn’t have to give me extra credit-“

“-y/n-“

“and you need to know that i don’t think all those awful things about you i was just being stuPId because those girls make me act stupid and i don’t know i should’ve defended you but i didn’t but i reaLLy wanted to but i-i just froze and i didn’t know what to do and aLSO i’m not letting you give me extra credit because i’m smart enough to know that i have to finish working for a full semester before you administer extra credit-

“oH my god will u just shUT UP”

in a raRe act of spontaneity namjoon grabs your cheeks and bends down and plants his lips right against yours

and as cheesy as it seems

f i r e w o r k s

your eyes flutter shut and you fist namjoon’s shirt in your hands as you kiss him back

and then namjoon realizes the the fact he’s kissing you

he’s kissing you

he pulls away quickly and steps back and you immediately miss his warmth but also

he just kissed you

did that really happen??

or are you overtired and you just dreamt that whole thing up??

“wha…”

“i forgive you, alright? and… you can come back and work here for your extra credit.” namjoon clears his throat and scratches the back of his neck “now go and take a nap before you pass out right here right now”

his entire face is on fire

what the hell was THAT

namjoon watches as you lie down behind the counter and cuddle up to a makeshift pillow (his hoodie that he let you borrow after a long night of studying)

a couple days go by

things are

kinda normal ??

you guys are slowly falling back into your old routine

you apologise again and namjoon reassures you that he’s forgiven you and tells you to stop saying sorry before he kicks you out again

you get a chance to fully explain the situation and noW namjoon definitely forgives you

it was a misunderstanding and yeah he was pretty hurt but

he’s over it now

and he tells you to quit apologising otherwise he’ll make you a sandwich with no mayonnaise at aLL and you shut up immediately

also

you two haven’t brought up the kiss at all

namjoon is mortified

he’s never going to be spontaneous ever again

do you even remember kissing him?? (yes u do and ur freaking out about it)

god he hopes not

jeSus

if it isn’t obvious by now namjoon is a lil bit of a coward

it’s not his fault!!!!

why would a sane person want to step out of their comfort zone?? just STAY in the comfort zone that’s why it’s called the C OM F O R T zone

things that are within the vicinity of kim namjoon’s comfort zone:

1) adding a touch of sriracha to his sandwiches for a LITTLE bit of a kick

2) drinking soup and wearing a crisp, white button-up because he’s very neat and is 100% positive he won’t get a droplet of soup on his shirt

3) not making a move on you because he doesn’t know what to do and if he doesn’t know what to do he’s just going to leave it like that

you, on the other hand

you are very different

things that are within the vicinity of y/n y/l/n’s comfort zone:

1) adding a SHITloAD of spicy mustard to your sandwiches because p a i n i s p le a su re

2) drinking soup and wearing a white tee-shirt because who cares?? if u stain the shirt you can just say you bought it like that AND it gives your clothes more character

3) making many maNy moves on namjoon to try and encourage him to reciprocate affection and eventually admit that he has feelings for you

“good morning, joonie~” namjoon’s eyes pop open when you lean down and plant a ‘’;’friendly’;;’;’ kiss on his cheek

that was unexpected

“morning” he clears his throat and stays quiet as you sit down and pull your things out

you wheel closer to him and look down at the desk “whatcha doin?”

“uh,” namjoon looks down at the book on the desk “re-binding a book… it, um, it was kinda falling apart but to be fair it’s a really old book so i can see why-“

“do you need help??” you reach over and brush your fingers over where namjoon’s holding the spine of the book down as he waits for the glue to dry

his cheeks immediately buRST into flames and he yanks his hand away before breaking into a nervous laugh “no!! it’s okay!!! i- uh, i suddenly remembered i.,,. i have to pEE” the chair spiNS in circles from how quickly he zippEd off of it and you let out a small breath

this is going to be a lot harder than u thought

“y/n, where did you- oh, there you are! your soup is getting cold” namjoon scratches the back of his neck

he furrows his brows when he sees you on your tip-toes on the toP STEP of the very VERY old wooden ladder

you turn to glance at him “oh, hey! i’ll be right there. i’m just cataloguing some of these older books”

“okay, um- maybe you should use the metal ladder instead?? didn’t i tell you the wooden one is basically falling apart?” namjoon adjusts his collar nervously

o god

his palms are getting sweaty

you look down at the ladder before shaking your head

“you never told me that”

LIES

he DID tell you that but this is all part of your master scheme

>:-)

although you’re probably going to break every single bone in ur body if you’re not careful so u should probably get off soon

you’re not aware of this yet but the weak wood is starting to splinter a bit under your weight

“i’m fine, joon. look!” namjoon’s heart stops in his chest when you stomp down on the step in a poor attempt to prove its stability “see?? totally fine”

oh my god

you’re purposely trying to kill him aren’t you

luckILY it doesn’t fall apart

and then he hears the first splinter

and a crack

and another crack

namjoon’s superman instincts immediately kick into gear and he zips towards you when the ladder suddenly snaps and you’re sent hurdLING TO THE GROUND

you find yourself in namjoon’s arms in a millisecond after falling and you blink up at him “holy shit”

“i toLD YOU” namjoon scolds and doesn’t budge when you slip an arm around his shoulder and praCTIcally cuddle up to him “i told you the wooden one was crap but you neveR listen to me and you could’ve seriously hurt yourself and whAT was the whole stomping thing are you an IDIOT-“

“you care about me” you grin and poke his chest and namjoon glances down at you

he clears his throat

“of course i care about u” he lets you back down onto your feet and takes a step away from you “now come and eat ur stupid soup before i smack u”

somehow you end up tricking namjoon into feeding you spoonfuls of soup because you’re “still shaken up from what just happened”

namjoon rolls his eyes at your antics but uh

he plays along

:-)

“y/n y/l/n??? reading??? preposterous!” you look up from your book when namjoon suddenly appears and sets a stack of books on the countertop

“don’t use your fancy vocabulary in front of me, you know i only know like 3 words maximum”

“what are you reading?” he adjusts his glasses and peeks over a little

“i don’t even know what i’m reading. i just picked it up because i was bored. it’s called ‘Captain Corelli’s Mandolin’. i thought it was about pirates but it’s….. noT.”

of course u thought it was about pirates

“oh! i’ve read that one! Louis de Bernières, right?”

you close the book to look at the front cover

“ya it’s lewis dee bearnards.”

namjoon looks at you like,, okay A+ for effort

“read it out loud”

“don’t you have work to do?”

“i do, but read a line to me! refresh my memory”

“alright, alright - here” you lean your elbows on the counter so that you’re right next to namjoon

you clear your throat and open the book to find where you were at

“When you fall in love, it is a temporary madness. It erupts like an earthquake, and then it subsides. And when it subsides, you have to make a decision. You have to work out whether your roots are to become so entwined together that it is inconceivable that you should ever part. Because this is what love is.”

“Because this is what love is.” namjoon quotes quietly and you put the book down

the two of you lock gazes and you can’t help but notice that something feels different between the two of you

and then you find yourself leaning closer

and closer

and-

“anYways it’s a really good boOk” namjoon suddenly stands up before clumsily picking up the stack of books “i’ll be in the back!!!!!!”

you groan quietly

SO close

“thanks for walking me home” you smile up at joon and he nods in response “and thanks for lending me your cardigan”

you slip your arm from his as you go to unlock your door

you turn around and wrinkle your nose “you probably want your cardigan ba-“

“you can keep it!” namjoon blurts out and quickly looks away “i mean, um… if you want. you can keep it. so next time you have something to keep you warm when it’s cold?”

you press your lips together to hide your grin and you nod and look down at the plain brown cardigan “okay, well… thanks again.” you murmur and take a lil step closer to namjoon

he looks up at you in surprise and you can FEEL the magnetic attraction bringing the two of you closer and closer

it’s going to happen

he’s going to kiss you at your front door

and it’s going to be magical

and then-

“i think i left my oven on at home” namjoon breathes out and he’s SO close you feel his breath wash over your lips “can i text you later?”

god DAMNIT

this is fucking ridiculous

you and joon keep having these almost-kiss moments and you will GLADLY smooch the man but he backs out every time and is like hOohOo i’ll be in the back!!!!!!!!! or he’ll be like i NEED 2 PEE or like i NEED TO READ A BOOK NOW

whenever you’re standing near him or your knee brushes over his when you guys are sitting with each other he gets all nervous and jittery and his face gets all flushed and then he’s like i NEED TO DUST SOMETHING

and then when he leaves each time you have to refrain yourself from grabbing the stapler and like stapling your fingers together out of frustration

he’s just so!!!!!!!! he’s being such a nAMJOON

you’ve never really chased a guy down like this before

and at first it was fun but now you’re just frustrated

so you’ve finally decided it’s time for the last resort

as much as you hate confrontation

it’s necessary in this situation

“i have a question for you” you murmur as you scribble a note down in your journal

it’s a pretty quiet afternoon in the library (as per usual except there are less people here since exam season is over)

namjoon’s sitting behind the counter and you’re standing in front of it doing your work because you felt like your ass was going to fall off from how numb it became due to you sitting on it for like 5 hours straight

you set your pencil down quietly “joon.”

namjoon sighs and flips through his book “if it’s about the online library system i told you you have to hit the big green button for it to sav-“

“why don’t you wanna kiss me again? i know you like me too”

wait wat

namjoon chokes on his tea and pats his chest a couple times before quickly adjusting his glasses

did you just

did he hear you right

what the fu

what???

what’s happening

is this a fever dream

you like him too?

“sorry - w-what?”

“i said - i know you like me too. so what’s the problem, dimples?” you lean over on the counter and prop your chin up on your palm

what’s the problem?

the problem is that this is way too good to be true

he knows exactly what’s happening

you don’t like him you only think you like him

he doesn’t need your pity

you’re only saying you like him because he’s the lame librarian and he’s not mr athlete like yoongi and you’re trying to make him feel better

“i- who- look, i don’t know who put this ridiculous idea in your head, but i-i don’t!” namjoon gets up from his chair quickly and walks out from behind the counter

the little gate snAPS shut

“why’d you kiss me in the first place then??”

…,.,.touché

“to get you to shuT uP” namjoon explains as if it’s the most obvious answer in the world even though he’s definitely lying thru his teeth right now

“to get me to shut up mY ASS”

namjoon bites down on in inside of his cheek and suppresses a groan

OH my god you are so IRRITATING

“wha- if anything, i think you’re the most infuriating, annoying, and obnoxious girl i’ve ever met!” namjoon takes a step towards you and towers over you but you don’t budge “you- you always crash the cataloguing system and you never put the books back in alphabetical order like you’re supposed to and on top of that you’re always bringing your dumb snacks in here and you always leave crumbs everywhere for me to clean up even though i’ve told you multiple times you have to clean up after yoursel- mmph!”

namjoon’s eyes go as wide as saucers when you’re suddenly grabbing him by the collar of his shirt and yanking him down so that you can kiss him

S M O O C H

you pull away and namjoon blinks quickly before his cheeks flare up

you let go of his collar and smooth it down before prodding your finger into his chest accusingly

“you have all these complaints about me yet you never activELy try to stop me and that signals to me that yoU LIKE ME- oh!” namjoon’s suddenly grabbing your waist and pushing you up against the counter and then he leans down to mash his lips against yours

you feel the sting from where the counter is digging into your back but holy shit you do noT give a fuck right now

his hands are cupping your face and he tilts his head to deepen the kiss

namjoon licks into your mouth and you let out a small noise of surprise

you whimper and tug at his tie to pull him even closer to you

“waIt wait wait oh god this is highly inappropriate y/n we’re in an educational setting” namjoon pulls away from you and you find yourself chasing after his lips before you’re like you’rE right you’re right

so the two of you step away from each other and you smooth out your shirt while namjoon adjusts his collar

the two of you look at each other and lock gazes

…

and then you’re immediately lunging at each other again and namjoon’s strong arms wrap around your waist while your arms wrap around his neck

he lifts you up in one swift movement and you find yourself sitting on the countertop leaning down to kiss joon while he slots himself in between your legs and places one hand on your waist while the other rests on your thigh

“you’re a very good kisser” you murmur into the kiss

“don’t underestimate me” he squeezes your thigh and you smack his hand away when it starts sliding up higher and higher

“so are you still positive that you don’t like me back?” you pout and slide a hand down his chest and namjoon reaches up to wrap his fingers around your wrist

he purses his lips and pretends to think “you might have to kiss me again and then i’ll have a definite answer for you”

you giggle and cup his cheeks before leaning in to give him a sweet little peck and namjoon hums happily

“…yeah, i definitely like you back”

the two of you can’t hide the fat grins on your faces

god bless the library

surprisingly enough you aren’t actually that much of a party person

just because going to parties requires so much damn effort

you take like two hours to slather 10 pounds of makeup on your face and another hour to squeeze into a saucy outfit

and then when you get to the frat house it’s all dark inside so doing your makeup wasn’t even worth it

and when you sit down you have to sit straight otherwise you’ll buSt out of your jeans

you only go to parties because of jimin

he usually takes care of the drinks and it would be plain rude of you to say no to free drinks!!!!!!!!

the basketball team is celebrating their big win and they’re going aLL out and they asked jimin to take care of the drinks for them at this party and so jimin was like ya you don’t have a choice you have to come to the party

and you know jimin’s going to be busy all night so you invited namjoon to come along

no offence to your sweet boyfriend but you hope he doesn’t get too overwhelmed because he gets overwhelmed pretty easily

obviously parties aren’t his scene which isn’t a bad thing

you told him that if he was uncomfortable and wanted to leave you would totally leave with him

you’re predicting that he’s going to show up in a sweater vest or something

bless him

to be fair you’re wearing one of his cardigans over your outfit right now just because it’s still a little chilly out anD the cardigan kind of matched with your ~lewk~ for the night

and also it smells like him and makes u feel cozy

:~)

“look at this set up! this is like a legit bar” you smooth your hands over the marble countertop and jimin nods enthusiastically

“i know right!!! you’re lucky that you’re friends with the bartender - so what can i get for you tonight, ma’am?” jimin smirks and tosses a rag over his shoulder before wiggling his brows

“surprise me, minnie” you grin

“where’s namjoon?” jimin plops a chunk of lime into the shaker

“he’s on his way! he wanted to stay back and clean up before coming here and he-“ your phone suddenly buzzes in your pocket “-and he’s calling me right now pardon me” jimin nods and wanders off to the other end of the bar for the ice

“hello?”

“hey, i just got here - where are you?”

“i’m by the bar! i’m wearing your cardigan so-“

“oh! okay, i see you. i’ll see you in a sec” you hang up and slip your phone into your back pocket and jimin wanders back over with your drink

“i’ll start you off with a spicy blackberry margarita” you ‘ooh’ in amazement because this looks like a veRy fancy drink

jimin watches you expectantly as you take a sip and your eyes pop open “this is SO good!!!!! please keep them coming or i’m suing” you murmur while taking the straw in between your lips again

“hi baby” you feel someone slip an arm around you from behind and you immediately recognise that musky cologne when joon props his chin up on your shoulder

“mm- hey dweeb” you pop a quick kiss on his cheek but you’re not really paying attention because this drink is bOMB

“what are you drinking?”

“it’s a spicy blackberry margarita. did you wanna try- woah.” you choke on your drink when namjoon sits on the stool next to you and you get a really reALLy good chance to look at your boyfriend because sweetie this is not your boyfriend

he has his hair slicked back

he’s not wearing his glasses

he has two small silver hoops hanging from his ears

he’s wearing a plain white tee that is very veRy tight around his biceps and a pair of ripped skinny jeans anD a pair of timberlands

y/n.exe has stopped working

“-whaaaaaaauhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh-“

whose mans is this

is this your mans???

this is your mans????

“aren’t you going to give me a proper kiss hello?” namjoon tilts his head and pouts

what the hell

what the hell?////???

“who are you and what did you do to namjoon?????” you manage to squeak out

he rolls his eyes playfully before leaning in and slotting his lips against yours

“cute outfit, by the way. a cardigan’s kinda dorky for a house party though, don’t you think?” he raises a brow and tugs you off your seat so you can stand in between his legs

“you’re calling me dorky??”

“i’m not the one wearing a cardigan at a party. have you never been to a party before?” namjoon slips his hands under the cardigan and rests his hands on your hips and gives you a little squeeze

“excuse-“

“y/n! hey, girl!” you feel a little piece of your soul die when you hear that familiar pitchy voice

you spin around in namjoon’s grip so that he’s hidden behind you

“wendy! …hey…” you clear your throat

you haven’t spoken to wendy or the others since the incident

just because they’re assholes and u don’t really,.,., like assholes??

“ugh, i’m so glad you made it! look, the girls and i just wanted to give you an apology.”

“well it’s not me you should be apologising to” you raise a brow

wendy scoffs playfully “well it’s not like kim namjoon would be at this party. you can just apologise to him for us or something!”

suddenly namjoon yanks you down so that you’re sitting on his leg

his arm slithers around your waist and your arm hangs loosely around his neck

“wendy! so nice to see you again!” before you get the chance to say anything namjoon offers the three girls a charming smile

.,,.,.god his teeth are literally perfect

wendy’s brows furrow in confusion

“see you agai- wait, namjoon?” she gawks and you feel a twinge of anger when her eyes graze him from his head to his toes

lisa and jisoo exchange glances before murmuring things to each other

you catch a glimpse of lisa staring at namjoon as if he were a piece of mEat

the AUDACITY of these girls

she takes her bottom lip in between her teeth before her right eye drops in a wink

namjoon sighs

“you alright, lisa? is there something in your eye? you’re blinking weird. and jisoo - i see a widdle piece of lettuce in your teeth.”

the two girls’ faces flush bright red and you press your lips together to keep yourself from laughing

wendy shakes her head “you- wow, you clean up nice…”

“wish i could say the same for you.” he pouts and reaches out to pinch her cheek “you’re looking a little red… maybe the stick up your ass is causing tension?” he suggests and props his chin up on your shoulder

woW

breaking news: wendy has just been COMPleteLY obliterated

“wow… whatever.”

you remain silent as the three girls immediately whiP around and head in the other direction

“…do you think i should go and apologise?” namjoon suggests sheepishly and you turn to look at him

“if anything i think you should’ve taken it farther”

“and this is why i like u”

“i know” you raise your fist and namjoon laughs before bumping his fist against yours “now, c’mon - let’s get you a spicy blackberry margarita”

okay

about two hours have passed

you and joon have been hanging out at the bar mostly

jimin keeps testing new drinks on the two of you

both of you have an ample amount of alcohol flowing through your veins

and now you’re on the couch because the bar was getting too busy

and uh

you’ve always been a affectionate!drunk and namjoon is now realising this

“what’s gotten into you?” namjoon laughs after you rub your nose against his before pulling away to give him a lil kith

“just loving on my boyfrienD” you giggle and wrap his arm around your shoulder before nuzzling against him

in the background you hear the commotion of people getting excited because jungkook’s gone and volunteered himself for body shots

you very faintly see min yoongi and the random thought of that water girl job pops into your head

namjoon takes the red plastic cup away from you “mhm, i think that’s enough for you, missy”

“namjOoooOn” you immediately make grabby hands for your cup and namjoon holds it away from you so that you can’t reach it

you’re practically stretched out on his lap trying to grab it

you huff and roll your eyes “well noW what am i going to do to pass the time”

spoiler alert: u somehow persuade joon into a make-out session on the couch (it was pretty easy and u had good points “everyone’s over in the kitchen doing body shots and also u look super hot tonight”)

you pull away from namjoon and take your bottom lip in between your teeth “…you wanna get outta here?”

“you need to learn how to be more patient” namjoon laughs when you squirm your way in between him and his front door

it’s hard to unlock the door when you’re pressing kisses to his neck aNd tugging at his shirt at the same time

“you need to learn how to find your damn keyS” you groan and tug at his belt

the moment namjoon unlocks the door he pushes you in and the keys clatter to the ground

“now look who needs to learn how to be patient” you squeal when he lifts you up in one swift movement and wraps your legs around his waist

“it’s still you” namjoon murmurs against your mouth and you bite down on his lip in retaliation

he grins and squeezes the underside of your thigh causing you to giggle

“stoP i’m ticklish there” you murmur and namjoon raises a brow

you pull away and jab a finger into his chest “don’t even thiNK about it”

“i have no idea what you’re talking about” namjoon shrugs innocently as he begins the small trek to the bedroom

you don’t know how he hasn’t dropped you yet

like ya you knew he was strong but you didn’t know he was thiS strong

your fingers wrap around his bicep and you give a testing squeeze and you feel a ziP of heat down there when he flexes underneath your fingers

o fuk

you fall onto the mattress and it bounces under your weight and the next thing you know namjoon is hovering over you

“c’mere, you” namjoon breathes out and leans down to press his plump lips against yours

he grunts when you roll your hips against his and let out a whimper

frick

he wants to hear you make more noises for him

“wait wait wait” you breathe out and pull away from joon

“what’s wrong?” namjoon sits up immediately

what did he do???? o god

he fucked up what did he DO

you reach over to the bedside table and namjoon’s like ??

namjoon blinks quickly as you slip his glasses onto his face

“as much as i liked bad boy namjoon i miss my bookworm”

“do you find visual impairment sexy?” namjoon adjusts his glasses and crinkles his nose

adoraBLE

you giggle and lean in to kiss him again

namjoon jumps when he feels your hands tugging at his belt and he immediately reaches down and wraps his fingers around your wrist

“what are you doing?” he breathes out and you move down and start pressing kisses to his neck

“taking your pants off”

well like

he knOWs what you’re doing he just

he doesn’t want to like,, pressure you into doing stuff because he rly likes u and u guys haven’t been together for thAt long

“we don’t have to-“

“why? are you a virgin?” you tease and namjoon scowls playfully as you continue to undo his belt “because i can be gentle with you!”

okay

he doesn’t like this game

“maybe we should get some chocolate covered strawberries and champagne?”

you continue your little jokes even as namjoon pushes you down gently on the bed

your head flops against the pillows

“you want me to light some candles?” you giggle when namjoon gives the side of your bum a smack after peeling your leggings off and tossing them aside

“oh yeah, i love candles. i especially love those vanilla scented ones.” namjoon tilts his head before peeling his shirt off and tossing it aside

you pause in your teasing for a second to admire joon’s sun-kissed tanned god-like skin

you want to take a bite out of his biceps

“maybe we can take a bubble bath or something? to ease your nerves” you coo and poke his nose when he slots himself in between your legs and leans down with his hands on either side of your head

“that does sound nice. i’m trembling with nerves, after all” namjoon sighs and buries his face into the crook of your neck and starts pressing kisses to your skin

“don’t worry - i’ll be gentle with you” you mutter and namjoon snorts before biting down on your shoulder playfully

oh god

you’re on cloud nine right now

“oh, namjoon,” you gasp and dig your nails into the nape of his neck

your back arches against his chest when he thrusts into you again

your toes curl into the mattress

you’ve never had sex like this before

it’s a slow slow burn and you can already tell that this is the best orgasm you’re ever going to have

“you feel so good” namjoon moans lowly and his raspy voice “s-so warm n tight and you’re all mine- nngh- fuck,”

“oh my god namjoon” you whimper breathily and your finger dig into his back

namjoon brushes his lips over yours in an almost kiss as he struggles to breathe because you feel so good around him

your vocabulary is very limited at the moment just because your mind is clouded with lust and you can’t focus on anything besides namjoon namjoon namjoon

“good?” namjoon leans down and presses his forehead against yours before his hand is slithering in between your legs

“good, s-so good,” you whine and arch your back against him

he keeps at a steady pace and continues to build up the pleasure and the tingling sensation and your toes curl into the mattress

“nam-namjoon- i-i’m-“ you choke over your words as you finally fall apart beneath him his eyes are hazy with pleasure and his pupils are so dilated that they’ve basically swallowed all colour in his eyes

“i’ve got you, you’re okay,” namjoon murmurs as he starts planting soft kisses along your jawline and then down your neck

the next thing you know you’re seeing stars and you’ve officially been reduced to a trembling whimpering mess

namjoon manages four and a half more thrusts before he’s letting out a groan as his orgasm slams into him suddenly

he gives you one last kiss before rolling off of you

you immediately cuddle up to his chest and the two of you share a moment of silence where you’re just processing what the heck just happened

“…not bad for a virgin, eh?” namjoon grins and you snort against his chest before whacking his arm gently

“c’mon, i think i promised you a bubble bath”

you love your handsome boyfriend

but those thick square frames of his makes him look like such a dork (which makes you love him even more)

sometimes he leaves them on the counter because he says wearing them too much gives him migraines

and you like to take advantage of the situation

“i’m namjoon and i can’t walk five steps without tripping over my feet!” you imitate namjoon and the boys burst out into laughter and you can’t help but feel a sense of pride not only because you know your impression is spot on but it’s also funny as hell

“i’m namjoon and i keep stale candies in my pocket like a grandpa”

another round of laughter and you’re feeling good

“hey wait - where are you guys going??? i haven’t even gotten to the good ones ye-“

you jump when you feel an arm slither around your waist and suddenly you’re being pulled into a hard chest

“i’m namjoon and you’re in big trouble when we get off from work today”

boyfriends usually find it sexy when their girlfriends wear an article of their clothing

and sure you’ve stolen a couple of joonie’s tees and hoodies and he thinks you look adorable drowning in his clothes

but nothing gets him going more than seeing you wear his glasses

especially when you wear them while you’re riding him

you know that saying

gentleman on the streets but freak in the sheets

namjoon is the epitome of that saying

“nNgh- na- namjoon! ah, joon, fuck-“ namjoon’s glasses slide down until they’re on the tip of your nose and namjoon groans at the sight

his fingers dig into the flesh of your hips and he bucks his hips making you cry out in pleasure

“fuck, look at you, falling apart on my cock - oh, you like it when i talk to you like this? naughty little girl” he reaches up to grasp your chin and presses his lips against yours

in conclusion: nothing gets him going more than seeing you wear his glasses

namjoon’s pretty proud of the fact that he gave you a new appreciation for books

because you’re reading a new book like eveRy week which is great

but now he’s starting to think that you might like books more than you like him

and he’s not typically the kind of person who whines because he thinks whining is annoying and won’t get you anywhere

but you are turning him into a whiney person because of your new infatuation with books

“joon, stop,” you scowl and push him away when he rests his head on your shoulder and starts reading along with you

you like to read alone and he knows that but he likes being near you!!!!!!! and you’ve been silent for like an hour!!!!!! and he misses your voice!!!!! so SUE HIM

“but you’ve been reading for an hour and i’m bored” namjoon pouts and slumps down on the desk

you look down at him and your heart flutters at how cute he looks with his pillowy lips in a pout and his cheek squished against the desk

“well let me finish reading a couple more chapt-“

“a couple more?!” namjoon squawks and gets the attention of some people sitting near the counter

“-and then i’m all yours! it’s just getting to the good part. i don’t bother you when you’re working!”

“because when i’m working, you’re working too! and you actually interAct with me when we work” namjoon grumbles and sits up before grabbing a random book and flipping through it angrily

“well i’m taking a break”

“yEAh like your fifth break in two hours”

“watch the attitude mister”

“u watch youR attitude” namjoon huffs before wheeling back to his side of the counter

he turns and gives you his best angry-looking face and you snort before putting your book down because he looks like an angry puppy

you wheel over to him and rest your cheek on his shoulder and namjoon shakes you off

“have i not been giving you enough attention, hm?” you coo and link your arm with his before grabbing his hand

namjoon doesn’t respond and continues to click on the laptop but he doesn’t let go of your hand

it’s time to pull out

the biG GUNS

you immediately smoosh your lips against his cheek and assault him with kisses and namjoon can’t help but break out into a giggle

this is all he needs to stay happy!!! just kiSs him a couple times a hour and he won’t be whiney anymore

it’s not that hARD TO DO

he reaches up to cup your face and leans in to give you a soft peck before pointing to the book that you abandoned for him

“go and finish reading… bOokworm”

namjoon typically is very gentle when it comes to pretty much everything

when he’s rebinding books he does it with such delicacy and precision so that a page is never out of place

when he’s dusting shelves his wrist flicks so subtlety as to not knock any books over

when he holds your hand he intertwines your fingers with his and it makes you feel soft and cozy on the inside

but the namjoon that is currently in between your legs is not the same namjoon

and you love it

you gasp as namjoon’s fingers dig into the meat of your inner thighs to keep you planted firmly against the bed as you try to buck your hips

“joon, i c-can’t-“ you whimper and squirm underneath him

“yes you can, i know you can,” namjoon purrs and presses a kiss to your inner thigh before leaning down and burying his face in between your legs

he’s already made you cum twice with his fingers alone and now he wants to make you cum with his mouth

“nO namjoon please-“ you mewl and bury your fingers in his hair before yanking “please i need you so bad”

as much as namjoon would like to spend the rest of the day with his face buried in between your legs he knows you’re not going to last much longer so he’ll show some mercy

also he’s like buSting out of his pants so he needs to relieve himself too

#selfcare2k19

namjoon sighs before pulling away and wiping his mouth with the back of his hand

he can’t help but smirk at the sight of you flopped on his bed with your hair in a halo around your head and your cheeks are flushed and your lips are swollen and your eyes are glassy

all because of him

“only because you’ve been such a good girl”

“i- oh!”

namjoon flips you over onto your stomach in one quick motion “and you’re going to continue being a good girl for me, aren’t you?”

you hear the gentle tinkering of his belt and the shuffling of his pants and you bite down on your bottom lip in anticipation

you nod quickly and prop yourself up onto your forearms

namjoon chuckles when you squirm and wiggle your bum against him “patience, jagi”

“i’ve been patient” you murmur into the crook of your elbow and namjoon smacks the side of your bum in warning

your eyes flicker up when you see namjoon’s hand reach out to grip onto the headboard

his other hand is on your hip and you freeze when you feel him easing himself in slowly

he starts off slow to let you adjust

but the moment you give him the green light

all hell breaks loose

namjoon begins fucking into you at a merciless pace and you can’t help but mewl and moan underneath him

you feel like your body isn’t even attached to your minD right now because you’ve never felt pleasure like this before

namjoon stays silent apart from his heavy breathing and the occasional grunt and if that’s not the sexiest sound in the entire world you don’t know what the hell is

“tell me who’s making you feel this good” namjoon growls into your ear and gives you a particularly hard thrust

“y-you, you are, i-i, oh god, namjoon-!“ you gasp and bury your head in the pillows

“up, baby” he warns you and wraps his arm under your stomach as he pulls you and straightens you out

your arms are shaking underneath you as you hold yourself up and namjoon leans down to press a kiss to the back of your neck

and then he’s placing his palm on the small of your back and continuing to push himself into you as deep as he possibly can

your orgasm practically obliterates your body when it finally comes

spots dot your vision and your fingers dig into the mattress and namjoon’s name continues to slip past your lips over and over again

you spasm uncontrollably around namjoon and that triggers his own orgasm because hoLy fuck you’re so warm and tight and-

namjoon pulls out and you feel splatters on the swell of your ass and you hear him groaning lowly as he finally relieves himself

you have no idea what’s happening

all you hear is white noise

all you feel are tingles up and down your spine

“you did such a good job, baby” you weren’t even aware that namjoon left to go to the washroom and now he’s cleaning you up with a warm rag “such a good girl for me” he coos and presses a kiss to your shoulder before he flips you over gently so that you’re on your back

he leans down to give you a sweet peck before nudging his nose against yours

honestly.,,.,. get u a man who can do both

“y/n!”

you look up from your phone and namjoon’s holding up the cataloguing notebook with a raised brow

“purple glitter pen??? seriously??” he says in a verY unimpressed manner

your eyes flicker over to the sheet before you look back at your frustrated boyfriend

“…you said you didn’t want me to use pink so i used purple”

namjoon suppresses a groan and pinches the bridge of his nose

some things never change

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