#Being sick is one thing
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When you encounter a person who does not do something that you consider normative, you need to understand that they could be either stating a barrier or expressing a boundary. A barrier is "I would like to partake of the normative activity, but I can't due to other factors." A boundary is "I have made a decision not to participate in the normative activity."
Many people do not believe that boundaries actually exist! This is why it's so common to give a clear "No" on an issue and get inundated with people saying "But have you tried-" They can't conceptualize that anyone might actually want to avoid X thing, so they assume that you totally want to do X and you would love X so much if only they could figure out a way around whatever pesky obstacle is getting in your way. But humanity contains multitudes, and for any given experience you consider vital for happiness I promise there are people who are Just Not Interested.
If someone is stating a boundary, do NOT talk about how sad their life must be, and do NOT try to push them! Just accept that their life experience is very different from your own, and isn't that a beautiful thing?
Barriers are different. Barriers suck. With boundaries, the only problem is other people being dicks. With barriers, the problem is the barrier itself . . . and probably, additionally, people being dicks. There's really not a way to win in the people being dicks department when you don't do something that other people have decided is Necessary For Humaning.
If someone is talking about a barrier they face, still don't talk about how sad their life must be, although it's fine to commiserate with a friend if they're complaining. It's hard! Some barriers are pretty insurmountable; the person might not ever get to do X even though they want to. And a lot of people don't believe that this kind of barrier exists either; we're very much taught that you can do anything if you try hard enough, when that is simply not true. If someone tells you that they can't do something, listen to them and respect that.
The only reason for not doing X that people really acknowledge as real are the surmountable barriers. And these are real, but even in these cases you should always assume that the person knows themself best and not give advice unless they've specifically asked for it. But if they have asked, it's chill to try to brainstorm solutions with them.
As someone who has both things going on, it really sucks that people tend to assume that everything is a) a barrier issue and b) that they personally have the solution to it. Don't do this.
The only way you can tell if something is a boundary or a barrier is to listen to people and believe them.
Example:
If you offer someone a drink and they say, "No thanks . . . I haven't really found anything that I like yet," (barrier, potentially surmountable) it is probably cool to ask them if they're open to trying something new, and if they say yes ask about their tastes to try to find a drink they would enjoy! They might like it or they might not.
If you offer someone a drink and they say, "I can't, it interacts with my meds," (barrier, insurmountable) you can say, "Aw, that sucks!" and offer them something nonalcoholic.
If you offer someone a drink and they say, "I don't drink," (BOUNDARY) you should give them a mocktail and shut the fuck up.
#this post is about being ace and also being a teetolaler and also being disabled and also--#there are some things i don't want to do and i am sick of people assuming that really i *must* want to#becuase no one could *really* be uninterested in drinking or sex or whatever#and there are also some things that i desperately want to do that i can't because of the curse#but a random stranger doesn't know which is which unless i tell them#you've got to listen to people when they tell you what they want or don't want to do#and you've got to listen to people when they tell you what they can and can't do
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It's so interesting to try and add to this story and not tarnish the wonderful work that's been done.
#nicholas galitzine#red white and royal blue#rwrbedit#rwrb#userninz#chrissiewatts#userveronika#usersteen#userclara#mine*#he said 'imagine'..... oh im sure#everyone having these interviews on the same day as the sequel announcement. they are SICK#the smile in the 3rd one. he knows things....................ugh#henry exploring more out there and expressive clothing in the sequel iktr#im a bit concerned he pointed at his face when he said style but im hoping that means henry messier hair and an earring ☝🏼#'being free in a lot of ways for the first time' 🥲🥲🥲 oh pain
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I can't autistic gayboy swag my way out of this one boys /cj
#I can. hardly make that joke right now ahaha#I'm not uh#''Scared''?#But I'm not great. We're not great right now and that sucks#Being sick is one thing#But the noise level in the house getting bad again is another thing#And the two on top of each other are of course even worse#It's taking EVERYONE in the front to calm poor Pierce down when it gets loud again and he breaks down in response#And people are having awful thoughts especially Pierce and Arathain#And then Rat is fighting with Arathain over that#And I just want this to not be this way ever because god I hate when we're doing so bad.#I hate when there's multiple issues at once#If we were just sick and that was the only problem it would be a little bit more manageable#But we also have to deal with the damn bird and the adult yelling back in response#And Elliott being loud again#Y'know she 'apologized' once for all the yelling but that was SO insincere considering it keeps happening.#And like I'm not mad at Rat but. please don't start fighting.#I don't know I just want everything to be fine instead of people wishing being sick would just fucking kill us this time.#I'm tired of the reminders that when things are starting to look up they're just going to crash again#And that we can never just be happy or bare minimum okay for too long#And we can't do anything about it#We've tried everything but just fucking dying and that we can't even try either#sigh.#[''roll the dice!'' | 🎲.txt]#// neg#// suicide#// fam issues
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merlin (immortal) giving arthur (pendragon) the only blade that could kill him
#they make me SICK#i hate them so much#if arthur had found out about his magic earlier and took it poorly…he’d be the only person able to kill him#merlin handing over the sword as a symbol of his utter trust in arthur#god imagine arthur finding out (au everyone lives) and being torn between wanting to cast the sword away but also wanting to keep it on him#he hates the weight of merlins life that now seems attached to the blade#he doesnt want it#but he cant cast it away bc what if someone gets their hands on it?? then merlins life is in their hands#he is BAFFLED that merlin would give HIM - uther pendragons son - the only thing that could kill him#he asks after days of fitful sleep and consideration and merlin is just like#‘its /you/ arthur.’ he says like its painfully obvious#NCJGSKSNSDIBSKSB TEYH MKAE ME VIOELTNT#bbc merlin#merlin emrys#arthur pendragon#excalibur#immortal merlin#merthur#im just thinking of percabeth when percy tells annabeth where his mortal point is and she is the ONLY person who knows#and she has to carry that tidbit of information around like its not the heaviest burden shes ever carried - more so than the sky#that one quote 'love is giving someone the power to destroy you but trusting them not to'#idk you get it#arthur and annabeth being the only people who can destroy the one they love#merlin and percy having unwavering trust and faith in their other half that they place their life in their hands#literally#sorry im done
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Every day I’m haunted by the fact the boys happily swim in sewer water
Even if it’s filtered somehow there’s no way it’s not still nasty 😭 Bet they can defeat any of their villains just by accidentally giving them diseases I swear
#rottmnt#rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles#bless their hearts but they’re nasty#it’s funny because like#each and every one of them has moments#where they’re a typical disgusting teenage boy#and then the next they have STANDARDS#can’t blame Leo for being so determined to go to a spa#even if he nearly licked his own foot that’s prob cleaner than anything else the boys have been up to in years 💀#thank you shelldon for all your hard work cleaning after then 🙏#they’re all gross teenage boys!!!#even Donnie he is NO exception here#bro was DRINKING A BEVERAGE while wading through sewer water he is just as gross as his bros#bro also talks with his mouth full he is no more refined than his equally gross bros fr and I love it#but yeah no way that water isn’t disgusting even filtering it would still leave grime on the walls of the sewer for yearsss#pros of them moving into an abandoned subway system is fixing their sense of smell enough to not be as gross#100% that’s part of why they didn’t mind being so filthy pre shelldon#because I mean they were literally raised in the sewers and they’re teenage boys like that’s a double whammy#THEY ALSO DONT WEAR SHOES#the few times any of them do the shoes are discarded before heading home 💀#I love them tho they are endearing anyhow#April’s immune system must be godlike just being around them fr#honestly no joke Mikey’s probably the cleanest of them all#just by virtue of being a chef#Leo I see as a mixture since he no doubt loves to pamper himself so he’s clean like#a percentage of time before he goes out and ruins his own hard work#Donnie is similar in that he’s just VERY SELECTIVE about what he thinks is too gross#Raph may be more on the stinky end but it’s not his fault he has his stinks and eats things of dubious origin(esp since his bros ate poison)#Donnie and Leo really have the gall to be sick about Raph eating the origami salami but they have no room to talk#all their villains are prob like please stay away from us we have salmonella now
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i think you guys are onto smth..
i unironically got invested in this HELP
#WHERES THE FIC AT IF SOMEONE WRITES THIS I WILL PAY THEM A HUNDRED DOLLARS😭😭#kunikida serving the country while dazai's serving cunt😔#dazai was born to malewife but forced to manipulate and i think that's the greatest tragedy of bsd#anyway some facts i would like to share abt this au thay i came up w while drawing!!#takes place in 1939 (start of wwii) and there was a mandatory draft that required one male over eighteen from each house to serve#both of them are still twenty two and had been engaged for abt two years before getting married that year#newlyweds! unfortunately kuni had to go fight and they were seperated :(#before the war kunikida was a math teacher at the local high school and dazai obviously managed the household and didn't work#he's hopeless at cooking and meal prep even w recipie books so they either get those prepackaged meals or kuni makes dinner when he gets ba#so like when he's making lunch for kunikida he normally just packs a basic sandwich w raw fruit#kunikida always appreciates the effort even tho hes probably sick of having the same thing everyday but he won't complain abt it#when kunikida joined the army he was relieved that the mess hall had better food than dazai#he was the only one in his platoon that never complained abt the food so his fellow soldiers assumed it was bc he came from a tough bg#when in reality he was just used to being poisoned on a daily basis from his dumbass husbands cooking and was hardly fazed from army ration#they write to each other although its more dazai sending and kuni receiving bc hes off fighting and doesnt have time to write back#dazai talks abt life on the homefront and how he has to grow a victory garden (everything is DYING HE CANT EVEN RAISE TOMATOES)#and kuni writes abt his fellow soldiers and how the war is going and when he thinks he'll be home and how he misses sleeping in a bed#ANYWAY yea thought i'd share sry for infodumping in the tags again#this post is for like the four ppl that care abt this specific flavor of knkdz so hopefully this gets four notes at least#bungou stray dogs#bungo stray dogs#dazai osamu#osamu dazai#kunikida doppo#doppo kunikida#kunikidazai#knkdz#lotus draws#bro sry for posting at two in the morning i couldnt sleep until i got this out of my head they have infested my brain
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Buttercups and Golden Flowers
#i drew this mostly because i noticed that a lot of people mistake buttercups and golden flowers as being the same thing.#so i wanted to try drawing them like. distinctly different in the same image.#it's not a big thing but i do think the fact that they're different has some significance. or at least like. symbolic meaning.#my art#undertale#chara#chara dreemurr#safeutdr#something about the fact that they both look similar at least in color but one of them is poisonous.#the way golden flowers are clearly a positive symbol throughout the game and clearly heavily associated with Chara.#contrasted with the very negative connotations buttercups have. with asgore getting sick and chara using them in their plan.#you never see buttercups in the game. which makes it even easier to mistake the two. because we've only seen one kind of#golden/yellow flower. who's to say 'golden flowers' aren't just referring to buttercups? well.#why would there be golden flower tea if they were poisonous? why would chara want to see the golden flowers from their village if they're#the same kind of flower? they clearly have buttercups in the underground.#it feels almost intentional the way golden flowers are so easily mistaken for buttercups. or at least that the difference is so subtle.#it goes well with the way they're associated so strongly with chara who's also a very subtle yet important part of the narrative.#from a surface-level perspective the flowers that took their life and the one's they actually like/are important to them are the same thing#but when you pay closer attention to the narrative you can see the different symbolic meanings.#well. uhh I've thought about it too much don't mind me.#see i think about it from the perspective of chara being super adamant about them being two different flowers#and frustrated when anybody gets it wrong. because clearly. CLEARLY they're not the same.#'STOP confusing buttercups and golden flowers. i literally used buttercups to kill myself do you think i would still like them after that?'#'do you think i want to be associated with them? they're not the same!!'#<number one golden flower enjoyer number one buttercup hater.#i need a badge that says 'i have strong opinions about chara dreemurr because i kin them. i apologize for the wall of text' at this rate.
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Okay but I do get really tired when people rag on Narnia's Biblical parallels for being too overt. Like, yeah dude. It's written for kids. Most kids don't do subtlety. I knew my Bible better than probably 95% of third graders, and yet my parents still had to clue me in. I've talked to people who grew up secular and didn't realize Narnia was Christian until well into adulthood. The Christian parallels in Narnia are at a pretty perfect level for most kids, and the fact that we as adults continue to get new spiritual meaning from it as we grow is a real testament to the depth of Jack's writing.
#mostly i just get sick of narnia being compared unfavourably to lotr#they are written for two different audiences with different purposes and different ingredients and they are both good!#like yeah okay tolkien disliked allegory. (a) narnia isn't exactly allegory and (b) even if it were would that be so bad?#Jack's over here doing his own thing. i for one love how overt Narnia's Biblical parallels are#okay rant over#why did i ever think it was a good idea to talk narnia on the internet. i am way too defensive and possessive of it#pontifications and creations#narnia
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"Hey, we found you."
"I guess you did!"
#ffvii rebirth#ffvii remake#ffvii rebirth spoilers#tifa lockhart#aerith gainsborough#aerti#aerith x tifa#briana white#britt baron#ffviiedit#ffviiremakeedit#tifalockhartedit#aerithgainsboroughedit#aertiedit#oh i feel SICK#i'm seriously ill i think#the closest scene we got to them actually SAYING this was aerith being like ''i'm glad you guys are all alright''#i wish i could've kept in how long it actually took for tifa to bring her hand out to touch her#tw: death#tw: grief#tw: loss#it's the fact that the first thing tifa does when she arrives at aerith's side in the first scene is touch aerith...#and in the second one she struggles to even bring herself to...#give the ''aerith will never smile or laugh'' speech to tifa in the next part pls i BEG you /hj#her tearfully saying ''aerith!'' broke me even more after barret's ''I'LL KILL YOU!''#i know that speech is integral to cloud's character so may be don't do that
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Sigh…
#jujutsu kaisen#anime fans will never not be weird about japan lmfao#like a lot of the stuff these ppl be going on about aren’t specific to Japan at all#it’s usually just basic morals and understandings you’d hope that most ppl would have like#rambling#‘did you know that the Japanese don’t feed dogs chocolate because it makes them sick :0?!’ ass shit 😭#also gege did cool he wrote one of the best characters of all time he kind of came up 😭 im not even being biased despite being a Gojo girl#gege did his thing but did he know what he was going to unless upon the world bro#gojo IS the hydrogen bomb bro
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reblog or <horrific thing will happen to parent>
reblog to get <specific amount of money>
reblog for <luck and something about a crush>
reblog if you aren’t <racist, homophobic, etc>
reblog or else <terrible tragedy happens>
reblog if you care about <obviously a good cause but is baiting you to look like a horrible person if you don’t reblog it>
SHUT THE FUCK UP SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT THE FUCK UP SHUT THE FUCK UP SHUT UP SHUT THE FUCK UP SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT THE FUCK UP SHUT THE FUCK UP SHUT UP SHUT THE FUCK UP SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT THE FUCK UP SHUT THE FUCK UP SHUT UP SHUT THE FUCK UP SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT THE FUCK UP SHUT THE FUCK UP SHUT UP SHUT THE FUCK UP SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT THE FUCK UP SHUT THE FUCK UP SHUT UP SHUT THE FUCK UP SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT THE FUCK UP SHUT THE FUCK UP SHUT UP SHUT THE FUCK UP SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT THE FUCK UP SHUT THE FUCK UP SHUT UP SHUT THE FUCK UP SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT THE FUCK UP SHUT THE FUCK UP SHUT UP SHUT THE FUCK UP SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT THE FUCK UP SHUT THE FUCK UP SHUT UP
#they all say ThIs OnE aCtUaLlY wOrKs#your friends with ocd do NOT appreciate this at all the next time i see one of these posts on my dash i’ll scream#alèssi says things#actually ocd#ocd#‘but you can just block the reblog bait tag’ it doesn’t get rid of shit.#if you’re not actually 7 years old why are you reblogging obvious bait and chainmail? grow up a bit. i’m so sick of it#the people reblogging this with ’reblog if you agree’ etc can also kindly go fuck themselves.#tw repetition#<- sorry i didn’t tag this earlier 🤍#i hate this so much why so many re logs#and reblogs being like ‘sorry i do this tee hee 🤭’ it’s not funny i’m not joking these posts are distressing!
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homest[ar/uck] posting.
this was meant to be supplementary to the gerome comic as him 'explaining the joke' but i uhhhhhh forgot.
i'm not much for crossovers in the the traditional sense, but it IS one of my favorite character exploration exercises to just go like 'if x media existed in this universe, who would and would not be a fan of it?'. and these ones are pretty notorious and always very fun to mess with for that and so here we are
#technically evangelion too but i couldnt think of anything intersting for eva with these guys#pizza tower#fake peppino#noisette#gerome#peppino spaghetti#these guys will just show him things and then he brings it home to peppino and hes gotta deal with all that#the simple fact is if you watch homestarunner at an impressionable age it WILL fuck up your lexicon permanently#and i think fp is the sort that is just kind of eternally impressionable. so#gerome is the only one of the cast whos into hsr he quotes it Constantly but no one knows hes referencing things#they think hes just saying shit. he knows this. he thinks it's funny. secret references for only him#but yeah that opening line was meant as an actual in-universe reference to hsr. when he says 'an old joke' it's literal jsjkskjdkjfd#idk what time pt takes place but hsr is perpetually yesteryear to me. that shit is so 2008 you really had to grow up with it i think#as for the other one. everybody i think at least knows OF mspa bc noisette talks about it All The Time#but the rest either dont get it or dont care. anyway its her right to be obnoxious about it. her privilege‚ even.#noise hates it though. hes so sick of hearing about it. if you mention a classpect hes gonna stab you#this is the only thing i have where the three besties are even close to interacting thats so sad.i need them being funny in a room together#pizzaposting
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ceebeepee stuff. panam being supportive and grabbing a screenshot from one of the most well preserved pre-nuke samurai interview video where johnny's high off his balls! johnny doing pyschological warfare! rogue playing mommy favorites! kerry doing psychological warfare! widdle v intimidating NPCs!
#johnny thinks kerry's dismissal of him being a bear as number one worst thing kerry's ever done#all of this are fun until i colored sick v and made him look so pale and i got kinda sad#proud with the puppy i made in that one tho#also v kissing johnny's cheek :))#didn't happen but still cute!! :))#cyberpunk 2077#i drew this tag#johnny silverhand#panam palmer#kerry eurodyne#rogue amendiares#lil guy v
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🤡 ⭐️ funny little cardigan 🌙 ❤️
maybe I'll actually dress up and style an outfit or something
#bo posting#my art#crochet#granny square#FINALLY TOOK BETTER PICTURES!!!!!!!!! AUGH#im still unbelievably proud of this#enjoy me never shutting up about it#its the first thing ive finished.... in months#and i feel like crying#ive been so envious of everyone around me being able to even hold a pen#and i had to chanel my creativity elsewhere and that was in this and this only#i was tired and felt guilty for how sick it made me feel to be in artistic spaces#or seeing my friends draw#like??? unproductive. helps no one?? 🗞💥🧠#so this was my solution#its the only creative thing thats made me happy in a long time#its the only creative thing that ive done for myself lately too#doing something creatively for other people has been hard#wahhhhhhh#i want to put my creative energy ive put into crochet into more things. i dont like how hard thats been#idky i havent been able to talk about it#like articulating it properly is one thing but like? never... even tried#i think it hit when it was the only thing i could tell my therapist that i could do that made me happy rn#the only expectations were my own#wow i did NOT intend to vent but hey thanks for reading 💏💖💋💞
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Misty isn't selfish for wanting friendship with toons.
Misty is selfish for her lack of consideration of toons, their feelings, their perspective. She only focuses on herself and how she has been hurt.
She feels hurt by Bessie's actions, claiming "there was no reason" for her to do such a thing. But toons and cogs are at WAR. Bessie didn't see Misty, she saw a COG approaching her and retaliated. She did not see them as an individual, she saw them as the enemy that's been terrorizing and colonizing their land. And rightfully so.
That being said, Misty did not have ill intentions approaching Bessie. Because of this, they feel hurt that she responded in such a violent way. Misty can feel hurt, but they need to understand why toons feel the way they do towards cogs. They are at WAR. And Misty just doesn't seem to realize that.
She feels entitled to play with toons and garner sympathy from them despite their ongoing battle against the cogs.
It's all about "you still tried to hurt me" and "i've done nothing wrong". Misty truly believes she is the victim and thinks she's entitled to sympathy from toons. But she's not.
Misty genuinely wants friendship with toons, which is why she feels so hurt when they reject her, even if they are right in doing so. Much of her dialogue implies she really is oblivious to the gravity of this war and why the toons, obviously, don't want to engage with her:
Misty may want to befriend toons with no bad intentions, but that doesn't erase what the cogs are doing to the toons' land. And the toons are still justified in fighting Misty. She is a cog at the end of the day.
Misty is so focused on her own, personal pain that she is completely disregarding that a WAR is going on. She disregards what the toons endure due to Cogs Inc. and thinks, just because she doesn't personally hate toons, that they owe her friendship.
I think Misty is probably the main reason for the fandom's villainization of toons and woobification of the cogs. But it's not the fault of how she's written, it's the fault of people who feel bad for a character and suddenly think all their morals have to align with that character. Now, they all have to adapt to Misty's way of thinking: that she is an innocent victim who has done nothing and doesn't deserve any of the treatment she's gotten from toons, and that toons are just evil monsters who attack her for no reason.
THIS COULD NOT BE FURTHER FROM THE TRUTH.
You can enjoy a character, like Misty, and feel bad for her. It's obvious there is some real suffering happening here, but it does not justify her view or lack of consideration for others. They are so focused on their own pain that they never think of others. They are so focused on being the victim that no one else can be a victim.
This line of thinking is so flawed, and when a big chunk of fandom REPEATS it, it leads to wild mischaracterization and woobification of. colonizers.
You can like characters who are bad people and disagree with their actions. Misty is not a good person. I think they are suffering, they are hurting, but that cannot be the end of the story. There are others, like the toons, who are suffering and hurting as well. And that should not be erased for the sake of your blorbo. You can still love Misty while condemning her way of thinking. I do myself.
There's the opposite end as well, where people acknowledge this character is not a good person but suddenly think they have to hate the character as a whole because they are morally bad.
Misty Monsoon is very flawed as a person and suffering from her own victim mentality, which hurts others as well. But I love this character. They're fucked up and just want a friend, but they're going to need to be more considerate and aware of their own poor actions if they want to earn that friendship and respect from others. Give and take.
#toontown#toontown corporate clash#ttcc#misty monsoon#rainmaker#my big juicy brain in full effect#having misty thoughts tonight i suppose!#sick and tired of mistys treatment in fandom. i think by far she gets the worst next to chip#misty is not flat evil but they are not good either.#i dont think they wish to be a bad person but they are bc theyre so obsessed with being a victim and getting sympathy#bc they feel its the only way they can be understood and make connections with others#i hope she makes a friend one day. i also hope she massively improves herself before doing any such thing.#get therapy gurl!
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So, despite some faults, I really enjoyed totk, and on its anniversary I want to say something about it. Other people have said similar things before but it’s really important to me and actually a big part of why the story of totk was meaningful to me, so I want to also say it:
Zelda needed to come back from draconification. The story needed that. It wasn’t lazy and just ignoring “consequences” because (imo) that was the *point*
The point is to feel like there are going to be terrible consequences and then say actually, no. You can come back from this, with the help of other people.
To me at least, that was the theme of the whole story.
If botw was about how the world goes on past loss and grief and starts to heal (how flowers grow in the ruins and the world can be beautiful again, be worth saving, even if it has changed)…then totk was about a more personal kind of healing.
The weight of the world should not be on your shoulders alone…you, alone, should not have to fix everything…you should not have to sacrifice yourself, but when you do, someone will be there to save you from it.
This turned into a really long ramble so:
You (Link) gained so much and now it’s gone. It feels like you’re back to where you started and yet you know you have to do it all again…you were weak and you failed and you’re weaker now…but
You go down to the surface. Monsters swarm across it once again. Other people are fighting them too though. You help, but it’s not just you…
You go to the Rito, the Gorons, the Zora, the Gerudo…just like with the divine beasts, there are friends who help you save each region. But this time, part of them comes along with you when you leave. It’s nice, you realize, the first time one of them protects you from a monster you weren’t prepared for. You’re still weaker than you were before, but someone has your back…
When you go up to the sky you see a strange new dragon there. There’s something about them that feels familiar. You try not to think about it.
You go down to the depths too. It’s terrifying at first. You hate it. You only want to get what you came for and get out of the dark….but slowly, the light grows. You get stronger. The dark feels like a challenge you can face (and someone has your back).
There are spirits down there. You don’t know when they’re from, but some part of you wonders…are these all the people you let die in the Calamity? (You help them find rest from their wandering. The weight on your shoulders feels a little less heavy).
There’s so much gloom. The first few times the sky turns red and hands chase you (a reminder of what you’ve lost, how you failed) you just run. Eventually though, you have to fight. It feels like the (second) worst day of your life again. But you manage to get free of the grasping gloom and stand and fight, as wild and desperate as it is. Beneath the manifestation of your worst fears, there’s another thing to fight, but this time it has a face (a voice in the back of your head says…you know this isn’t all on you and your failure…it’s really Ganon’s fault right?). You get through it.
At every turn in your travels, it seems like something reminds you of Zelda. Her passion, her curiosity, her kindness. You miss her.
At first, the tears you find reassure you. She may be in the past, but she’s safe. She’ll come back somehow…but then you hear the word draconification for the first time. You want to believe she wouldn’t do it but you know her and the fear sits cold inside you. (Zelda is a lot of things. She’s been allowed to be more of them, since she was freed from her hundred year battle, without her father holding her back. But deep down inside her, there’s a vein of self-sacrifice that still runs strong. It’s what saved the world before, after all).
She did it. She really did it. She’s gone from you (from Hyrule) forever, and it’s all your fault. If only you hadn’t failed so utterly in the battle (you can hardly even call it that) under the castle. If only you’d caught her. If only you hadn’t let the sword break. You should have protected her you should have been better it’s all your fault and now she has to live with the consequences, forever. Everything really is on you, you should have been better.
(Zelda POV: you couldn’t call upon Hylia’s power in time, you were too content to let it wither and fade away from you, ready to be free of it. You shouldn’t have. He got hurt, the sword got hurt, it’s your fault…Sonia and Rauru help you channel it again, Sonia helps you learn how to turn back time…but you don’t save her. She dies because you couldn’t save her. Rauru dies not long after. There is no one left to guide you, once again. You could spend years trying to figure it out on your own. But you did that last time. It didn’t work. Self-sacrifice, stepping in front of someone you love, that worked. (You do what you can, to call upon the sages, to help Link in the future, first). And then you swallow the stone. You’ve come a long way, in the past five years, allowing yourself to exist. But in the end, self-sacrifice worked last time. It’ll work this time too.)
You (Link) go down beneath the castle. You were supposed to bring the sages but you didn’t. It’s nice, for someone to have your back. But no one else should get hurt to fix your mistakes.
They follow you anyway. They fight with you, against the hordes, against the greatest enemies you defeated together, along the way. They’ll have your back, even if you don’t think you deserve it.
You fight Ganondorf, and then the demon king, in the hardest battle of your life. You think it’s over and then the demon king decides it’s better to lose himself completely than let you win. You’re exhausted and afraid of yet another battle, but up there in the sky, when you’re falling, the Light Dragon catches you (you wonder why she changed her path to catch you, you wonder if there’s still something of Zelda left in there to save). With her help, you win.
And then you’re in some other realm. The spirits of Sonia and Rauru are there. You remember how the two of them and Zelda channeled such incredible power together. You think about Recall. Turning something back to the memory of what it was before, like Sonia said. You stand with them and you allow yourself to hope. Maybe the Light Dragon can remember the form she took so long ago, the person that she was.
And then you’re falling, and Zelda is falling, but this time you catch her. You catch her. She’s back home with you, finally, finally.
And maybe, one mistake doesn’t have to be the end of the world. You don’t have to be perfect. Sometimes, someone else can stand with you, and it’ll all turn out alright. (You can put the weight of the world on your shoulders, you can sacrifice yourself, but someone will be there to catch you, someone will be there to pull you back to yourself, when all is said and done).
#loz#tears of the kingdom#Link#Zelda#I will say also that I think part of the reason totk is special to me is very personal#like when it came out I was still struggling with the worst burnout of my life#I had had a few months of exhaustion between January and March and in May that exhaustion was still sticking to me#it was hard to get out of bed hard to do anything I felt so tired that I almost felt sick but I wasn’t sick#and the thing is Zelda games are my biggest special interest#and having a new one to play like genuinely I’m not joking it gave me bsck so much energy#I was doing really badly but when totk came out I played it for an entire weekend straight basically#and like my mom came to visit me and help me out with basic life stuff#and like sit with me while I played just like enjoying being together#and that was really nice#over that summer and the fall after I started getting to know someone I work with better#largely over conversations about totk at first#and they’ve become a good friend#(and become someone that I feel safe to be fully myself around)#and so I just have this really strong personal connection to totk#like I will not claim to be impartial about it#there are definitely criticisms that I can acknowledge#in particular I don’t like that they un-amputeed Link let Link be disabled#and also ganondorf’s characterization was shallow and one dimensional#and I’m sure there’s other things I could think of#but the overall narrative#including Zelda becoming the light dragon and then turning back in the end#I really like that#it felt like a narrative of healing to me#and playing it at the time that I did felt really healing to me too
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