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#And you get all nostalgic to go back to it
002yb · 3 days
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Royjay baby fever 👀 perhaps
(The olde plap plap get pregnant gyahaha)
Since this blog is what it is, Dickjay + Roy baby fever, sorry! 👀 Because ahhhahaha imagine if you will:
"So when are you going to let Dick knock you up?"
By no means are Roy and he the sort to pussyfoot around each other, but damn. Jason's jaw drops. From the kitchen, he can hear how Dick fumbles some dishes - a loud crash followed by an unnatural silence.
That Dick overheard the comment is mortifying. That he’s clearly listening for Jason’s response only makes matters worse.
Roy's question feels more accusatory than inquiring. It’s so shocking that, for a moment, Jason considers it before remembering he’s a man; there's nothing to fucking think about. Even if he could get knocked up, it’s not like Dick could—
Not the point. Jason scowls and stretches his leg across the couch, driving his heel into Roy’s thigh for being so crass.
‘As soon as you leave,’ is what Jason ought to say. It’s exactly the sort of sarcastic quip he’d usually banter with, but he's acutely aware of Dick's eavesdropping and while Dick wouldn't care, the thought of being so brazen makes Jason blush. Instead he grumbles, "We already have Damian."
Ugh, Jason can feel how Dick clutches his chest in endearment. The sentimental sap.
"Yeah, but don't you miss when he was a baby?" Roy asks around a nostalgic sigh and oh—this is clearly about Lian, which makes Jason snicker. That makes more sense. Roy probably saw some old photos or was accosted by the kid about wanting siblings or some such.
"He's arguably still a baby." Jason snarks, but can't bite back a smile at the memories of before and he finds himself sharing them eagerly—small hands that always reached for him, patting his cheeks and pulling his ears; wide, green eyes staring up at him with wonder instead of the sullen broodiness of an edgy punkass brat; the way Damian taught himself to walk just to toddle after him all the time and—
There's a thump from behind him and Jason startles, looking over his shoulder. He finds Dick half-sprawled across the floor, exposed from where he'd been hiding behind the corner. For a long moment, they stare at each other with matching flushes across their cheeks and Jason realizes that oh. He'd never told Dick about this part of Jason's sorted past, had he?
It's a problem to address at another time though, because Jason can feel the trouble Roy is stirring up behind him as the man comes to the conclusion that Dick is their weak link in all things domestic.
Jason turns on him with a warning, "Don't you dare—"
And Roy laughs as, at the same time he calls, "What's it gonna take for you to knock this man up, Grayson? He needs a baby!” And the crux of the matter, like the good father he is: “Lian would be so happy, come on!"
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I wanna see Danny absolutely insane. Not like. We got too silly insane. Like, pushed past his breaking point, desperately trying to hold on, for the fifth time this week, and it’s Monday.
I wanna see him smile when Dash shoves him into his locker, because he’s not sure what to do. On one hand he’s so done with this, and he knows he could end Dash in a fraction of a second. On the other hand, it was almost reassuring, nostalgic, he remembers when this used to hurt.
I wanna see ghosts and humans alike, go to hurt or bother Danny Fenton Phantom. And have them stop when he turns around, because the look in his eyes is not something they understand nor want to mess with. Lancer saw a weight he thought only characters in books could possibly have to carry, Paulina saw tears and when has anyone ever seen him cry, Vlad saw exhaustion that cuts into your very core but you have to keep going because that’s what’s expected of you, Ember saw grief and pain over something that never happened but could’ve been, Dash saw pain a hundred times worse than anything he’s ever felt, Jazz saw protectiveness of a kingdom who hates him, Wes swears he looked insane.
And Danny? Danny is done with their shit. And he doesn’t swear. He’s so tired of everything, he’s so close to giving up, he is very much not feeling phantastic right now. He’s got more scar tissue than skin, he’s pretty sure everything he owns has at least a little of his blood on it by now, he’s forgotten what feeling okay is like, and he can’t even begin to describe everything else, and he means everything. He’s got half the mind to track down who ever said death was peaceful and make them deal with his life. But he’s a hero. Right?
He knows he’s got duties, the Realms needs a king, Amity needs a protector (both the humans and the ghosts), Danny Fenton needs to go to school. Oh and he’s pretty sure Frostbite is having a panic attack after looking at him which is ridiculous. But still, the stars seem real inviting right now, he wonders if Clockwork would turn back time for him and just let him sleep on the moon for 200 or so years. Probably not. (Clockwork absolutely would’ve). He might just do it anyways. It’s kind of ridiculous how much somethings just look like comfy beds to sleep in for a trillion years to him now, he fell asleep in a snow bank earlier which wasn’t nearly cold enough. But it’s kind of fair Danny supposes, he can’t remember the last time his home really felt like home, and Amity in general is his haunt, but eh, whatever.
Still though, having your enemy worried for you is really something. Like Vlad should comment, Vlad’s the source of a small fraction of his problems! Which is a lot! First of all having to worry about another source of constant attacks, having to try and convince his parents that Vlad is so clearly evil, having to check up on Dani and also make sure Vlad isn’t trying anything like that again, and not to mention the whole mayor of the town he lives in thing.
Okay this kind of got off track. But my point is, I want it to be too much, instead of somehow managing to survive it all and getting help, Danny gets pushed off the edge (and can’t get out) and he just goes crazy, he breaks down right in the middle of school over a minor inconvenience, laughing then sobbing then screaming then wailing for ancients knows how long. Then he flies off somewhere and continues to breakdown for a while, then he returns to his life like nothing happens, but it did.
That was it.
He can’t be pulled back now. You had your chance. You all had so many chances. And now he’s lost it for good. And you all deserve it.
He’s not going to apologise for punching Dash through a wall, he’s not going to apologise for whatever he did in that little blacked out period of time, he’s not going to apologise for taking a nap in the observatory and hissing and attacking all the tourists and everyone else, he’s not going to apologise for dissecting his parents, he’s not going to apologise for making Vlad regret it, he’s not going to apologise for making the ghost writer eat a book, he’s not going to apologise at all.
You let him get like this. He doesn’t want to shift the blame. But what was he supposed to do? No. Oh no. Don’t try to explain. This is all your fault. And he’s tired of pretending he’s fine. And he’s tired of helping. Because you lost that a while back.
You all don’t even know how dead you are to him, he had a little regret when it came to Sam and Tucker and Jazz, and that’s why they’re alive right now. Because they did all they could, well, not all they could, but that was because he asked them not to tell. Maybe he shouldn’t off.
-
All hail the high king Danny Fenton Phantom. The king who never stopped crying.
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in1-nutshell · 10 hours
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Maxima meeting Team Bee
SFW, Platonic, Cybertronian reader
RiD 2015
Maxima was not having a good time.
She had been searching for Bumblebee non-stop after he went radio silent for the past couple of weeks.
Maxima had been looking all around, asking for favors, and taking long hours to find him.
Until she got a vision from her late father.
Optimus Prime.
She thought she had finally joined him in the Well because she felt her spark pulsing out of her chassis.
He looked just how he had when… when…
His booming voice reached her audials like a nostalgic song.
Her own voice constricted in her throat.
Optimus tells her to go to Earth to help Bumblebee and his team.
A portal opened in front of her.
Without a second thought, Maxima ran in.
She lands straight into a scrapyard.
Maxima carefully looks around the place for any sign of hostilities.
She finds her first one in the form of a giant green Dinobot.
Grimlock had just come over to this corner of the scrapyard to find something Sideswipe mentioned.
Which now thinking about, sounded made up.
He did notice the mysterious bot in the corner though.
Grimlock and Maxima stared at each other for a bit.
“Ummm… can I help you?”--Grimlock
Maxima shakes her helm a bit and points at her Autobot badge.
“Friendly.”--Maxima
Grimlock relaxes a bit seeing that it was a friendlier bot.
“And actually I could use some help.”--Maxima
“Oh okay! What do you need help with?”--Grimlock
“I’m looking for a friend of mine. I was told I could find him here.”--Maxima
Grimlock scratches his helm a bit.
“I don’t know too much about finding bots. BUT Fix-it might know! C’mon! I’ll even introduce you to the team!”--Grimlock
Maxima smiles at the infectious grin on the Dinobot.
“Lead the way… what’s your name?”--Maxima
“Grimlock! And yours?”--Grimlock
“Maxima.”--Maxima
“That’s a nice name.”--Grimlock
“So is yours.”--Maxima
The two talk and walk to what looked like the main area.
There were three bots and an orange minibot on a ship console that was partially buried in the mountain.
The three bots immediately pulled out their weapons seeing Maxima with Grimlock.
“Hey! Hey! She’s a bot like us!”--Grimlock
“And how do you know she isn’t just lying?”--Strongarm
Maxima squints her optics a bit at Strongarm.
“Now why do you look familiar…”--Maxima
Drift steps forward.
“What is your reason for being here?”--Drift
“Grimlock was taking me to see a ‘Fix-it’.”--Maxima
“That’s me!”—Fix-it
Maxima looks over at the orange minibot.
“And why would you need to see Fix-it?”--Sideswipe
“She’s looking for a friend, right?”--Grimlock
“Yeah—Wait! Your Strongarm aren’t you?”--Maxima
“How do you know my name?”--Strongarm
“Team, we have a situation—”--Bumblebee
Everyone looks at Bumblebee.
Bee looks optics with Maxima.
“Maxima?”--Bumblebee
Maxima gives a smile while walking over to him.
“So, this is where you’ve been?”--Maxima
“Yeah—”--Bumblebee
Maxima slaps the back of his helm.
“Hey!”--Bumblebee
“That’s for leaving without letting me know.”--Maxima
Maxima pulls him in a denting hug.
“Thank the Primes you’re okay…”--Maxima
Bee, feeling a bit guilty, hugs back.
“…When did we get a new bot?”--Russel
“Sweet Solus Prime Bee! You already got found by humans again?!”—Maxima
Maxima makes a quick first impression with everyone on the team.
She makes it clear to Bee that she isn’t going to leave him high and dry.
Bumblebee is glad to have an extra pair of servos helping around.
She becomes his unofficial, official second in Command of the Team.
If he is being honest, he was a bit afraid of Maxima taking the reigns of the team and leading.
Maybe she would have a better chance at leading like her father.
“All I’m saying is that you could definitely lead the team.”--Bumblebee
“Yeah, if I must. I wouldn’t want your job, Bee.”--Maxima
“But you’re a natural leader, just like Optimus was.”—Bumblebee
Maxima pauses for a split second before turning back to her work.
“A natural leader? Yeah, that’s just called ‘Survive long enough for the original leader to come back.’ Bee, do you not think your team would riot if you gave me the command?”--Maxima
“Well…”--Bumblebee
Maxima gives him a stern look.
“You’re a good leader Bee—”--Maxima
“But I’m not Optimus!”--Bumblebee
Both look at each other in silence.
“Maxima… I didn’t mean--”--Bumblebee
“Bumblebee. No one wants you to be Optimus. Not Strongarm, not Sideswipe, not Drift, not Grimlock, and defiantly not me. We want you. You and all of your flaws, terrible jokes and racing stripes.”--Maxima
Bee looks down a bit.
Maxima pats his shoulders in reassurance.
“…I miss him too; I miss him so much Bee. But right now, I think he’d want me to talk some sense into you. So here it is. The leader who you are now, that’s what this team needs. I’ll step in when its needed and give advice, but I’m not going to lead your team, got that Bee?”--Maxima
“Yeah… Thanks for talking sense into my processor.”—Bumblebee
Maxima flicks his door wings a bit.
“Someone has to. Consider it my job to look after your bumbling behind.”—Maxima
Bumblebee swats one of Maxima’s tires.
“Hey!”--Bumblebee
It was quick work to get along with most of Team Bee.
Maxima, Strongarm and Sideswipe made regular sparing partners.
Who knew that a monster truck could have agility?
Not them apparently.
Sideswipe is a bit let down that he can’t patrol with Maxima due to her alt mode drawing too much attention.
But off-road patrols are the best ones yet.
Maxima lets him do stuff on patrol that Bumblebee doesn’t let him.
Strongarm respects Maxima for being a former team member of the legendary Team Prime.
Though there was a time where her respect was more on a ‘tolerance level’ than genuine respect.
Strongarm did think that Maxima was a little bit like Sideswipe but didn’t really vocalize it too much.
That was until Sideswipe tried to take advantage of Maxima’s lax and got in trouble.
Maxima was the first on the scene.
Maxima and the team looking at Grimlock stuck in a rock arch.
Bumblebee and Maxima turn back to Sideswipe with, both with arms crossed.
“Sideswipe. What you did was reckless and endangered not only yourself, but also Grimlock.”--Bumblebee
“It was not my fault that Grimlock fell in the rock! If he’d—”--Sideswipe
“Grimlock was your partner for patrol today, Sideswipe. You both are supposed to have each other’s backs, not just one. If we wanted solo patrols, we would have authorized that. You put yourself and Grimlock in danger when you started blaring the music too loud and got ambushed. Which brings us here.”--Maxima
Grimlock was stuck in his Dinobot mode and stuck on a rock arch.
“It could be worse. Anyways Grims fine, aren’t ya!”--Sideswipe
Grimlock groans a bit.
“Yeah I’m fine… when did we get another Drift… and Strongarm…”--Grimlock
Maxima looks at him unamused and turns to Strongarm.
“Strongarm, take Sideswipe back to the scrapyard, I got Grimlock. We’ll be taking the scenic route to get back before the sun comes up.”--Maxima
“What!?”--Sideswipe
“What?”--Strongarm
“You heard Maxima.”--Bumblebee
“Maxima, with all due respect, how are you going to get Grimlock out by yourself? Let alone get him back home in one piece?”--Strongarm
Maxima walks over to the arch and punches the rock at an angle.
The rock crumbles releasing Grimlock with a small thud.
Everyone was stunned by this.
“H-how—”--Drift
Maxima throws Grimlock over her shoulder like a sack of potatoes and starts the opposite path.
She stops momentarily and turns back slightly.
“You better have a good apology when you get back to the scrapyard Sideswipe because I can get pretty creative with enforcement when I want to.”
Maxima and Grimlock disappear from view.
“…”—Team Bee
Sideswipe looks at Bumblebee.
“Did you know she was that strong?”—Sideswipe
Bumblebee shrugs almost looking smug.
“She’s wrestled with Predacons bigger than Grimlock, Sideswipe. And she isn’t kidding about the ‘creative enforcements. Either.”--Bumblebee
Bumblebee transforms and drives out.
“That didn’t answer the question!”—Sideswipe
“Did he mention Predacons?”—Drift
“… Lets just get back home.”--Strongarm
 Strongarm defiantly looks at Maxima in a different light after that night.
She sees her as another mentor figure alongside Bumblebee.
Drift was a bit on edge with Maxima joining the team.
He did give the benefit of the doubt considering that Maxima was on Team Prime with Bumblebee during the war.
She couldn’t be bad if Bee tolerated her.
Drift truly began to open when his former master came back taunting him for his Decepticon past.
Maxima did not judge him or give him pity sympathy.
She earned some respect points from him that day.
The minis like to hang out with Maxima whenever they have a break.
She will come to the mini’s defense at any moment, something that he is grateful for.
Maxima shielding the mini’s with her frame from the Decepticon.
“Wrong move Con. Wrong move.”--Maxima
Maxima judo flips the Con and drop kicks him to Drift’s pedes knocked out.
“Where did you learn that kick?”--Drift
Maxima shrugged.
“Mulan.”--Maxima
“What’s Mulan.”--Drift
“…Russel! I have the perfect movie for tonight!”—Maxima
Grimlock liked Maxima from day 1.
She already seemed like a nice bot and boy was he right!
Of all the team, his favorite sparring partner was Maxima.
She could take in more hits and more time than most of the members of the team.
And did he mention how strong she was?
Sometimes Grimlock would start arm wrestling matches between the two of them on slower days in the scrapyard.
It was always fun to see how long each other would struggle to bring the other one down.
Bets have been made those days.
Bumblebee currently has the best luck in the betting pool for Maxima, which many don’t think its fair considering that he has known Maxima for longer, therefore, knows more about her than they do.
Drift and Sideswipe are tied at the bottom of the betting pool.
Grimlock also likes how Maxima refuses to hear the team treat him less.
That being said…
The team has learned that the duo sometimes cannot be left alone for too long.
��Hey, has anyone seen Maxima?”--Bumblebee
“Now that you’ve said it, I haven’t seen Grimlock either.”--Russel
“I’m sure they’re fine.”--Denny
BOOM!
Grimlock comes in running fast in.
“Coming through!”--Grimlock
Bumblebee quickly grabbed Denny and Russel and moved out of the Dinobot’s way.
“Grimlock!”--Bumblebee
“Sorry! Gotta catch this time!”--Grimlock
“Catch wh—”--Denny
Maxima comes descending from the sky.
Grimlock dives and manages to catch her in his arms.
“You finally caught me Grimmy!”--Maxima
Grimlock has a huge smile on his faceplate.
“Now its my turn!”--Grimlock
“Grimlock no!”—Bumblebee and Denny
“Grimlock yes!”—Maxima and Grimlock
Grimlock, with Maxima still in his arms, runs back the same way they came in.
Bumblebee sighs tiredly but lets out a soft smile.
“I’d just like to think what Optimus would say right now if he say her like this.”—Bumblebee
“Why Optimus exactly?”—Denny
“Oh yeah you two don’t know. Maxima is Optimus’s daughter.”—Bumblebee
“SHE’S WHAT!?”—Denny and Russel
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ox1-lovesick · 2 months
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hi
#life update nobody asked for lol#I missed you guys my pookie wookie dookies#I deleted all my social media and life is so great wow#still a lot of mental health problems but I'm finally learning to deal with my emotions and not hate life (wow)#is it bad for me to say I'm so glad I left blr#I will probably never come back here lol but I think (?) today is txt's debut anniversary and since I am the self proclaimed empress of moa#downgrading to a flip phone actually#I unstanned txt and all the kpop peoples too (SHOCKER)#I do feel really nostalgic and sad when I think about them but I think it was the thing I needed most#delulu is infact not the solulu#daydreaming about beomgyu being the new student at my school and being soobin's bestie was never the greatest idea hey#it's so freeing to not care about them and focus on what's infront of me#if you need a sign to start growing out of kpop and start worrying about your own life here it is babe 😭 don't let anybody give you shit#Not to say kpop is bad or anything I just think for me it was getting a bit out of hand#As much as we all make fun of the delulus it's so easy to fall down that spiral when these idols constantly tell you they love you#The parasocial relationship was REAL istg these people felt like my friends#Hueningkai does not give a FUCK about me and he is so real for that#Thinking about deleting this blog but I'm logging off after this so I very well may forget it exists again#But I just wanted to share what's been going on#And I miss you guys a lot#I may have outgrown kpop and tumblr but you all still have a special place in my heart#I miss the good old days 😭 when discord let's me back in I might visit wme#Not much has changed with me but mentally I feel like a whole new person#But I hope you all are doing GREAT#Living your best lives and doing things that make you happy#You owe it to yourself more than you owe these celebrities anything#xoxo savie 😝🤟🤟🔥🔥🔥
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There's always a slight yearning in the back of my mind wishing I had been born in the right place, time, family situation, income level, etc. to have just lived in one single house for my entire life. Imagine being born in a place that still suits you, even through all of your personal evolutions and etc. The idea of deep familiarity with an area because you've lived and explored it for 40+ years, being encased in a web of memories and connections. Being able to clean out your old childhood bedroom and find personal artifacts, to dig in the yard and remember. I know those lives can still be plenty imperfect, but there's just something so seemingly solid and stable and Grounding about it that I sometimes wish I could have.. (At least from my outside perspective as someone who's moved around a bit geographically and even within the same area, never lives in the same house/ apartment /etc. for more than a few years usually.) Like... having a place that is printed upon, fully your own, rather than chronically a visitor, every thought of a space always tempered with the notion that one day soon you'll have to pack it all up again, etc. There's something peaceful about the permanence.
#I think also because I'm a very nostalgic person - THOUGH not in the way that somep poeple mean when they say nostalgia because I've realiz#ed that to some people apparently it means like.. more of a sad emotional thing? Or when I talk about being nostalgic they say 'me too' and#then describe how they're always depressed dwelling on the past wishing they could revisit it and replaying it and feeling sad and etc.#Whereas for me - it's not in a deep or emotional way at all. It's very detached - kind of like someone who is doing like a scientific#cataloguing of something? I don't feel any remorse or sadness or longing or sitting there sobbing for hours over people/pets I've lost or#etc. It's more like a fun contemplative excercise and extension of self analysis plus just documentation. Like I know your memory fades as#you get older OR even as stuff is actively ongoing humans have terrible recall - even the ones who are less emotional/more focused on#accuracy our minds still twist things or etc. SO I looove to have documentations of everything possible so that in the future I will have#as full and complete of a view of myself as I possibly can. sure the image will undoubtedly be a little distorted but having real evidence#of how something was at a time is very valuable. You look through old messages or letters or something and you always find other alternate#versions of yourself. Not in a worse way like inherently inferior Previous Models Of You who haven't yet been perfected but even just in a#neutral way like 'what they're saying is not a BAd thing but also is not how I would say that today.' etc. ANYWAY I find it really interest#ing to document and remember things and love revisiting the past - not in a sad way - but just like. curiosity. reminiscing and recalling#and filling in gaps. or trying to have the same feeling I felt at a previous time so I can remember what it was. Collecting information for#documentation purposes. Like for example - I would love to go back and tour all of my old childhood houses/apartments. Not to like#sit in the middleof them and cry and go 'ohhh my childhood waughhh' - but literally because I want to take detailed photographs so I#can remeber exatly what they looked like and recreate them in sims or some other digital way. Why? idk. just to gather the information. If#I ever live to like 80 years old and I'm still reflecting on my life curious about the dteails of it. I want to be able to fire up my#ancient windows 10 laptop I've kept all these years and open up the sims 4 and tour my old home with accuracy etc. ??#Not sure why really. Maybe an extension of how I generally care a lot about having an 'accurate' view of things? Like I would rather be#accurate than be happy. I don't understand 'ignorance is bliss' because I would always rather know. I always always in any situation am mor#focused on 'what is the well researched practical truth' than about 'how does this make me feel' or etc. Truth above ALL else even if it#were to make me miserable. Aka why I'm a 'boring' 'annoying' 'UM actually..' type of killjoy lol because it's very hard for me to understan#that some people can enjoy something or have a good time even not knowing the full facts of a situation or etc. BUT anyway. since that is#some core driver of my personality for whatever reason (just the plague of ennegram type 5 perhaps lol) maybe that also drives me to my#kind of minor obsession with like 'I must have a complete view and calatoguing of my life that is as accurate as possible within the means#i have' . Is it REALLY important for me to know the exact layout of on of my first childhood bedrooms? no. materially it does nothing for m#in life. BUT hey. it would make a great addition to the Accurate Life Story Catalogue lol. ANYWAY.. But I think a lot of wanting to live in#one place forever is not just the ease of documentation. but the sense of having a constant. Much of what i crave most in life is stability#& familiarity &routine bc of how my brain works. And it just would feel so good to be Settled. Never uproot again. One little place FOREVER
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dropespeon · 15 days
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god. god. sasasap. ogd
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laufeysodinson · 11 days
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coming back to say i’m so happy his dreams are coming true 🥹
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born-to-lose · 4 months
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I know the working conditions were kinda shitty and my colleagues and bosses didn't appreciate me enough but damn I miss the bar already 😭
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harbingersecho · 7 months
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WODtober 2 > City By Night
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storfulsten · 6 months
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hey uh sorry for disappearing yet again for a couple months. don't have much of an excuse, though things have been more stressful than usual, offline life having involved family and hospitals and stuff, but not gonna go into any details, things are better now either way so ye. my way of coping with things have been mostly to just play games (ffxiv mainly, leveling alts and other grinding can be a good distraction sometimes) and nothing else to keep my mind off things, so haven't been able to focus enough to do much of any art at all. I am hoping to get back into the swing of things, I am back on my meds that I skipped out on for like a year due to various reasons, but they seem to be helping again so yeah, fingers crossed that things will work out and such ha
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badolmen · 6 months
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My toxic trait is unironically liking 2000s-2010s country music 😔
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in celebration of the fic ALMOST being done here's a piece of the scrapped outline from 2019 that still makes me laugh
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deathxproof · 6 months
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hm, out of all of the things I was expecting when I slowly started putting myself back in fandom spaces, “unresolved trauma from being an autistic kid/teen who was always perceived as Too Much” wasn’t on the list, to be quite honest.
#ooc !#maybe I’ll unpack this more on my personal blog later. Who’s to say. not me certainly.#but yeah the amount of friendships/relationships I had from like. elementary school to high school(to even some of college)#where like. it’s suddenly revealed to me incredibly late that I’m being seen as overbearing / overwhelming / needing or being Too Much#and by then there is no fixing it yknow. by then they’re just telling you to get you to fuck off (or telling other people and not you lol)#(that happened way more often in online fandom spaces)(but tbh my hang-ups in online fandom spaces)#(come WAY MORE from like. interactions with Very Particular People)#(who self-admitted to like. actively trying to dig up dirt that didn’t exist on people ‘just in case’.)(or if they just didn’t like someone#(they aren’t around here anymore but nevertheless the few times we interacted and they tried that w me made me paranoid for ages </3333)#ANYWAYS if you read this far: hiiiiiiiii#i’m doing fine but oh god the weird nostalgic loneliness of being That Kid really hit me all at once#I’m still so bad at making friends now because of all of this naksdak#like I have to put effort into keeping up with people or else I’ll accidentally hold myself back / kind of isolate#under the assumption of like ‘oh you don’t want to scare this person away do you? you don’t want to be overbearing right?’#and it’s like. hey. hey brain. hey bitch. we gotta talk to people to actually form relationships with them. that’s how this works.#vent#anyways I gotta go build a closet now ᕕ( ᐛ )ᕗ...
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likedbyuarmyhope · 8 months
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i’ve really been an army for over six years huh. i’ve been an army for almost a third of my life
#i was 15 when i discovered them. jk was fucking 19 and now i’m 21 and hes turning 26 like i’ve actually grown up with them#i’m so excited and impatient for the future with them but im also sad for all the experiences i had as a baby army that i can never get back#my first year as an army was almost entirely on tumblr and the community used to be so big and social and just. so much fun#even my first couple years on army twt feel so nostalgic now. there were bad things of course but also so many great things#i just feel so lucky to have lived through these last few years with them and i never want to lose those feelings#aeron.txt#it’s so cliche but there really are so many things that you just had to be there for#the struggle of joining their fancafe (i definitely gave up after the first few tries)#the first bangtan bomb they added closed captions to (and when they took them away as punishment for spreading an exclusive fancafe video)#(i still hold that video of the tannies taking turns kissing taehyung so very close to my heart)#their first ever bbma. their first performance at the amas#the creation of bt21#the post-concert vlives during tours#bon voyage to look forward to every summer#jimin’s silent twitter videos#we’ve consistently gotten so much from them and i’m so happy for all that we’re continuing to get#i never want to seem like i think the old days were ‘better’ or like i’m not just as grateful for what they give us now#i just get so nostalgic and melancholy when i think of all the things that we don’t get to experience anymore#i was so young and going through some of my most formative years and it’s such a unique feeling to have grown up alongside bts#i’m still growing up with them. so much of what they taught me years ago is only now showing up in the decisions i make about my life#god i love them so much i love them so so so much
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frozentothetouch · 1 year
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if tbhk got a reboot, can tpn? please???
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holytrickster · 10 months
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honestly i get embarrassed i don't have like. a single other interest I'm as into because i just know everyone around me is probably sick of it
#idk i probably shouldn't have to feel bad about my interests but i annoy myself like oh my god please read something else talk about..#..something else. its not like i dont like other media; i think pathologic is really freaking cool even if i havent had the time or patience#to play either game yet; i love derry girls it's a really good show; i have this attachment to firefly despite its issues#it's not like i can't get into other things#but nothing has had the chokehold on me that the legendarium has had/still has years later and it's almost frustrating sometimes#like i used to be really into gravity falls for instance. also cuphead; also bartimaeus and lockwood and co. oh and seraphina#but while i still really like all those things and theyre nostalgic for me; i can't...so easily fall back into those worlds in the same way#maybe it is also kin related but it's almosg like i get embarrassed to be so fixated even though it's been such an enjoyable part of my life#as cheesy as that no doubt sounds. i wouldnt be the same person if somebody (i dont even remember who anymore) hadn't been like “hey..#“..middle schooler aimenel you should read the hobbit” (actually i think i mightve read lotr first i dont remember anymore)#idk why it bugs me; why im like “oh no people will be annoyed by the constant posts” as if anyone couldnt just unfollow or block#im probably always going to be like this to some extent and i dont know why i cant stop feeling embarrassed by my attachment to certain..#media. its not even an “oHhH nOoOo its problematic in some ways” thing because i really dont give a shit for the most part#i think its literally i feel like people are going to at a certain point go “arent you too old to like this”#which isnt even going to happen probably so i dont know why i care. i dont know why i care when im honestly cringy as shit all the time#its funny ive becomr someone a much younger me would call cringe and just trying to be special or whatever
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