#.pdf | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

sam-monroe · 2 months

Text

Summary: Following after the film, Sam starts to realize that the time after his father's death only started to hurt him more than let him thrive. However, how can you thrive when you seem cursed to be doomed in misery? Characters: Sam Monroe, Robin Kimball, Adam and Ryan Kimball, various OCs to fill the gaps LOL Warnings: minor character death (? maybe can be considered major, but he's not from the film), teenage angst, sam re-emofying himself Ships: None Word Count: 6.9k words A/N: This directly follows after the film (with some time gap because funeral planning), and it does have a minor character death in it. I wanted to expand on Sam's story, and I really didn't like the "feeling lighter looking lighter" trope they had with him. Let him stay emo... :( Anyways, I hope you enjoy this. I'm currently crying over it for the 3428794237 time. VERY loosely based off Your Graduation by Modern Baseball. Edit 02.29.24: Major rework, adding details, fixing punctuation, etc etc. I'm sorry I'm a shit writer. Read here on ao3

Normally summer breaks would be marked with back to school shopping, maybe a few more parties or something else to bring a close to the months of break from school. However, this wasn’t the case for Sam this summer. The summer wasn’t marked with the rushed supply shopping for all three kids, no. It was marked with another divorce and a funeral. Luckily, they didn’t have to move, and due to his stepfather’s shit talk of Sam behind his back, Sam didn’t have to see him anymore.

Good riddance.

Unfortunately with grief things seemed to get better for the family, getting closer again, but Sam had felt so much more lost. He headed up the light wood stairs as they had come back from the funeral as the sun poured into the mostly white and light wood decorated home. He was wearing muted earth colors, having one of his father’s flannels on him as he felt so puffed up from crying so much. Even Adam and Ryan cried a little. His mother guided them to the kitchen to make a snack, but he moved to his room. He got the left door open, looking around at the walls covered in spray paint, Manson posters and other various things from magazines.

Maybe his room could use a makeover like the house did. No idea what it would be changed to. He moved to his built in bathroom, moving the beads of the Sacred Heart to the side to get in the surprisingly clean bathroom. Compared to his room, his bathroom was always clean. He got to the sink to get some cold water on a washcloth before pressing it to his face. Hopefully this would help the swelling, and hopefully he didn’t cry again.

He held the cloth there for a few moments before ringing it out to get it draped over the faucet before moving back out. There was a knock from his door and he silently came over, opening it. His mother was there, voice soft,” I’m going to make some sandwiches, do you want one?” “No… I was thinking of cleaning my room.” “You haven’t eaten since breakfast,” she gently prodded,” come on. The room can wait.”

It still felt like a trap. How she was suddenly nice to him. He didn’t know if he should like it, but still, he was hungry and his energy felt nearly depleted. “Alright,” he grumbled, moving to follow her back down to the large kitchen. He sat at the little bar area in the middle of his half-brothers, sighing softly.

Robin moved to get ingredients from the double door fridge, absently flicking the radio on to fill the silence. She got plates set up before getting started on the sandwiches,” what drink do you boys want with it?”

Ryan chimed for apple juice which Adam nodded for and Sam was just quiet. She glanced at her oldest, voice soft,” Sam?”

He finally came back from the zoning out he was in as he looked at her. “Apple juice is fine.” After he spoke, his eyes dropped back down to the gray tile of the counter as she just opted to work on their lunch.

Plates were soon placed in front of them before she moved to grab three glasses for juice. Getting them placed on their table setting, she got a bag of chips open and dumped into a bowl before placing it in front of Sam. “Now, eat up you three. It’s the best thing you can do after crying a lot. Your body needs the energy back.” Ryan and Adam didn’t have to be told twice, but the new kindness was still unsettling to Sam while he grabbed a handful of chips to place on his plate before munching on one.

Eventually, Robin made herself a plate and leaned against the counter as she ate, watching Sam a moment. “What do you think you want to change in your room?”

“I dunno … maybe everything. Maybe some doors for my closet.”

“If you won’t break them, I can get a contractor to see about the space.”

“I won’t … Can I paint the walls?” Glancing up, he gave a small shrug, popping another chip into his mouth afterwards.

“Anything but black.”

He took a bite of the sandwich, thinking for a moment as he tried to think on what he even wanted to do. “I was thinking of a slate color.”

Robin nodded a moment as she listened,” that would be nice, especially with all the windows you have there.” And it would hide all of the spray paint you sprayed everywhere. She took a chip, hiding her mouth with her hand while she chewed momentarily,” would you want new furniture? I don’t know if the wicker can be salvaged from the spray paint on it.”

“I can paint it over… it just needs to be sanded and primed.”

“Alright, if you’re sure, we can go get paint after lunch for the walls. Do you want to do your bathroom also?”

“Yeah, a light gray.”

“First, we’ll do your room then the bathroom.”

“Can we redo our bedrooms, Mom?” Ryan chirped out, grinning at her with some mustard smeared on his cheek. She chuckled as she came to wipe it off. “If you want, but Sam’s first because he’s the oldest.” And I hate the sight of that room.

After lunch had been eaten and dishes were taken care of, she took a brief trip to get paint samples. Returning, she told him to make patches of the colors on a section of the wall to figure out which one dried best. He nodded as he moved back to his room, getting inside with the bags of four samples. He first moved to get all of the posters and images down around his room before getting the dresser pulled back from the wall holding his bathroom door in the corner. He got squares painted up and penciled on the wall beside them which color was what before he looked to his room.

Well, might as well clean it. He began with gathering up the clothes, working in silence before he couldn’t handle it anymore. Getting music flicked on, he steadily worked on cleaning his room out. He gathered up the makeup he had stolen from stores, throwing it out along with the various materials he used for huffing. He started to go through his clothes, clearing out some of them. It felt like he had just started when he was called for dinner, but his room was finally cleaned for the first time in forever. Well, at least he could see the floor now.

It was strange to see the walls so empty. He brought the beads he had gathered to the side from the bathroom door down first before he headed down, stomach aching finally while he registered his hunger. Cleaning was a good distraction though ... Maybe the renovation would help.

The time for his first day of school came, and god, he didn’t want to face the bullshit of introductions and trying to find his classes … Or getting shit on like usual. Alyssa tried to talk to him, but the summer had been such a shit show, he didn’t want to really talk to her. Not after she admitted to kissing his father when he was on morphine. He moved through the halls to get to his locker, and Nick came up to him, confused at his appearance.

“Yo, what the fuck, dude. Where’s your piercings and shit?” His eyes were wide while a brow arched, glancing over him.

“Gone. Stuff happened this summer, okay?”

“Yeah, dude. We were wondering why you weren’t at Lake Tahoe with us, it was so fucking fun dude. I was high most of the time or fucking,” he grinned lazily at Sam.

Well, at least Sam’s guess of how that trip would have been was right. “I was with my father working on a house.” Sam shrugged absently, glancing over to Nick. You know … just before he died.

“Duuuude , that sucks. I bet that was boring.”

He remembered demolishing the old house, thinking about how stress relieving it was. At least, when he had finally decided to help. “… It was kind of fun.” He shrugged as he swapped out a few textbooks for his starting class.

“Sam, you hate your father. What the fuck? It was fun?” Brows furrowed as Nick looked over him trying to piece who his friend had become in a few months. No piercings, earthy tones, the blue in his hair had severely faded out and his hair wasn’t as styled as usual. Not to mention the clear lack of makeup.

Sam slammed the door shut as he looked down at Nick,” I said stuff happened. That’s all you need to fucking know. Okay?” There was the normal Sam.

“Chill out dude,” Nick rolled his eyes,” you know, this might be the year I finally dump your ass.”

Irritation was already building up in Sam from the conversation,” then just fucking do it already like everyone else. I don’t give a fuck,” he moved past him to get to his science class, weaving through the crowd.

As the school day progressed, Sam just isolated himself more and more, focusing on the work for once. He got to his car after the last class dismissal, getting inside with a slow sigh. He hit his forehead against the wheel for a moment before starting the car up. He could get some coffee. He got his window rolled down a bit before he lit a cigarette, starting to drive to the nearest coffee shop.

Getting parked when he had his black coffee in hand, he just sat and smoked as music played. On day one, he lost his friend, nearly fought someone at lunch, and already got a threat of going to the principal. He sighed softly as he leaned his head back, shaking his head absently while taking a slow drag.

“Fuck this.”

It was never going to get better, was it?

Unfortunately, it didn’t really seem to. As the weeks of the new year went on, he started to fight with his mother again. To Robin, it seemed like the summer with his father didn’t change him as much as she hoped as the winter break started to approach.

Sam just focused on his room, the walls now painted while the bed frame as it dried in the garage. His mattress was flopped on the floor for now as he laid on it after completing his homework. He had his headphones on with his eyes shut, absently holding some of his comforter as he had locked his door once again.

He knew that the niceness from his mother was just fucking performative as he laid there. His eyes slowly opened to look at the ceiling as he thought things over.

I will never be good enough for her, would I? What the fuck am I doing? Why did I destroy my room? All in the name of Dad's memory? No. Fuck this. This isn’t who I fucking am, he thought as he moved to pause the CD before making his way downstairs. Luckily they hadn’t donated much of what he had been through and he hauled the bags of clothing back up to his room. He dumped them near the mattress on the floor, some shirts spilling out before he left his room to hunt Robin down.

He found her in Peter's previous office on her computer, brows furrowed in concentration before looking up as her eldest entered. Here we go.

“Can I borrow $40? I'm going to the mall," he asked, arms crossing over his chest while his gaze bore into her slightly.

“Alright, be back for dinner.” She sighed softly, getting a $50 bill out for him. “Use the extra ten for whatever or food. I don’t have smaller bills.” Something was happening with him again, but she didn't have the energy to try to fight him back on it. Landing them right back to square one before the summer.

Sam took it from her, getting it shoved into his pocket while he gave a small grumble of thanks. "I'll be back soon."

He got to the local mall before navigating his way into the Hot Topic he had definitely stolen from before. he had gotten a little too good at it, and the employees never knew... Though, theft wasn't unheard of in the store. What was another person using the five finger discount? This time, Sam was hoping he could find some new AP magazines for posters and maybe some new jewelry. Maybe I could get a job too. Then I would have more money for shit.

He got past the metal doors, brushing absent strands of curls back from his forehead as he entered the dimly lit store. God, there was so much new shit. He started to look around, noticing there was a hiring sign out. He asked about it to an employee and was soon at the back counter filling out an application for associate while leaning against it heavily as the manager watched him on occasion after returning from her break. After he filled it out, he moved to flip through the stack of magazines on the side display case. He wasn’t so sure he wanted Manson everywhere again, but he could try to find maybe a Nirvana one or something. Anything to take up the space on his walls. He found a few that interested him before he moved to get to the jewelry racks until a cool looking pair of pants had caught his attention. Still, he knew that pair would eat up half his money. He started to look through the jewelry once again, grabbing a few rings and a necklace before moving to find the hair dye.

He looked over the items he had before calculating how much he had already spent before determining he could buy dye. Picking bright red, he made his way back to the register while smiling a moment. A nice change. Something different than blue. While leaving the store, he absently checked his phone for the time, making a soft sound. Still some time until dinner. Getting to the FYE store, he started to browse through CDs, quiet as his head absently bopped along to the music from the speakers. The hours started to pass as he began to look through CDs, starting to accumulate a pile of possible purchases. It wasn’t until his phone started to vibrate that he realized the time. He answered it as he grabbed a TOOL CD, heading to the register,” I’m checking out at the CD store. I lost track of time.”

His mother gave a slow sigh,” fine. Just be here in thirty minutes.” It wasn’t long before she hung up after that, and he soon paid for the CD silently with the employee. He tucked it into the Hot Topic bag, heading out with a small nod of thanks to the cashier.

He felt a little better as he got into his car, setting the bag in the passenger seat as he started it up. He knew it just wasn’t a fucking phase. He had felt so miserable, and constantly like he wasn’t even himself while working on his grief. Not He had experienced bad moments of a dissociative state, and God, he hated every single one. It was unnerving that he wasn’t fucking high but his body just doing it.

A horn going off somewhere in the lot caused him to come back, breath soft as he backed up to head home. Maybe one day he could find more posters or tapestries or something. One day, his room will be back to normal and maybe he would feel better... more like himself again. He headed on the route to home, fingers tapping along the steering wheel. The drive had been uneventful and honestly, Sam didn't remember most of it while he parked in the drive way. He sat in his car for a moment, lighting a cigarette again to just have a few more precious moments before an awkward, silent dinner. Once he finished it, he soon came inside, heading up the steps quickly to toss the bag onto his mattress before heading to the garage.

He poked at the black painted headboard experimentally, pulling his fingers back to check his skin. Thank fuck it was dry.

Moving back inside, he got to the dining room where his mother and brothers waited for him before he sat down. He didn’t speak as he ate, his brothers chatting about school and their friends. He didn’t have any updates of his own, so why would he talk? His mother was more than happy to have silence from him instead, listening to Ryan and Adam as she ate.

As soon as he finished his plate, he moved from the table to take care of it before he moved to the garage to get the pieces of his bed frame back into his room. He got some help from the live-in maid, Trish, getting the pieces into his room before he set to work on reassembling it. Setting the bed in the same spot as before, he got the mattress back on before he half-assed made his bed again. He would just kick the sheets around in his sleep, it didn’t matter if it was made or not.

Sam grabbed his CD player that was on the floor and got onto his bed once again, getting the new CD unwrapped and popped into it. Soon settled down on the bed, Sam was again staring at the ceiling. God, I would do anything to have weed right now. A flash of the summer came when he was about to sell himself out for money before he pushed that idea away as disgust came at himself. Why am I so fucked up? Besides, if I get a job, then I don't have to fucking do that.

Easy answer: he was nurtured into it. He thought of the previous years, and he hadn’t truly been happy since he was six before the divorce. Nothing ever seemed like it would get better. Not since his mother remarried that fucking asshole, not since he got half-brothers, not since he started using when he was twelve to just feel something. He was fucking depressed and it felt like no matter what he did, it was never good enough or that he wasn’t enough.

Robin had walked in on him having a fucking scarf tied around his fucking throat in his broken closet and she still didn’t ask if he was okay. Instead, she went to her then second husband saying he needed a man in his life. He had lingered in the hall to see if maybe she would say something good, but there was no concern. Just disgust. He was disgusting to his family. He doubted that it had changed since George's death.

So, why should I try to make them feel better by conforming?

He shut his eyes slowly, letting out a slow breath, fuck it.

Fighting with his mother was beginning to be a daily occurrence as Sam got a nose piercing and got his lower lip piercing again. Luckily, since he had taken care of his ear piercings, he was able to get some back into the lobes but not tragically not the cartilage. He started to swipe makeup once again from the drugstores, and he believed he felt a bit better. His teachers were surprised as he slowly looked like himself again, yet he wasn’t neglectful of the work this time. In fact, he was getting almost straight As now. He was sober even if begrudgingly, and left his shitty friends behind. In September, he did finally make a new friend, a boy who just moved from New Mexico, and he was just happy with that.

He had gotten a little close to his history teacher, often lingering in the classroom after school ended to do homework and ask about certain eras. He was lingering now with Matt beside him as they worked on a science project together, each of them having an earbud from Matt’s pair as they listened to the TOOL CD. Matt moved his pencil to circle an area with the eraser on Sam's paper,” that’s supposed to be a different formula.”

He looked at the formula, brows furrowing as he glanced over to Matt,” that’s the one we were given.”

“It’s the work formula, not for the kinetic energy that you need.” Tilting his head, he leaned over again to get a better look at Sam's paper while brushing some dark brown strands back from his eyes.

Sam let out a slow sigh as he slowly melted to lay his head on the desk. “I can never get it no matter how much I try. I’ll pay you to finish it. I can’t focus. I give up."

Mrs. Nellings watched the two of them with a soft smile as she heard the struggling while she worked on grading. It was still good to see Sam making some connection that was within his age group. She had certainly heard about his behavior through the years, but she couldn't believe that it was him now. Then again, he did lose a loved one.

Matt watched Sam with softening green eyes, patting his back,” it’s alright. I can do it. I know things have been hard again.”

That was still strange, being comforted and reassured. Still, Sam was reassured about it as he lifted his head, nodding. “Alright … But I’m buying us tacos or something.”

“You know I can never deny my love for Taco Bell.” Matt dramatically said as he placed a hand over his heart as he watched with a brow arched up in amusement.

“I was thinking more like a taco truck since … y’know. California. Maybe some elote too. Y'know, not that shit they slop around at the Bell.”

“Hey, don't talk about my beloved," he grinned, eyes lighting up at the mention of a truck. "Oh, fuck yeah. Just give me all the papers, and I’ll make a page so you can write it down another night.”

Sam nodded as he gathered up everything to give it to him for far better safekeeping than he could ever do himself," alright. I guess that'll work. I doubt I'm going to ever use physics ever in my life."

Placing everything into the project folder, Matt soon was shoving it into his backpack with a small shrug. “Never know, dude. Might be handy one day ... Buttttttt, I am hungry, so I’m demanding payment now.”

Sam snorted as he rolled his eyes briefly while getting up after zipping his bag up,” alright. Let's go then.” Motioning Matt to follow, he navigated through the empty halls of the school to get out into the parking lot. Grimacing at the familiar heat, he led Matt out He opened the trunk to throw his bag in after getting his wallet from the front pocket as Matt chucked his into the trunk with a grin.

After getting inside and getting it started up, Sam started the way to find one of the taco trucks, humming along with the CD in his car playing.

Matt absently drummed on his thighs as he watched the passing scenery, glancing at him. “I did mean it, though. It is okay if you can’t grasp concepts. Not everyone’s brain is wired for physics or science and math.” He looked over to him again, a soft, reassuring smile on his lips before looking ahead to the road.

Sam glanced at him briefly, scoffing momentarily,” yeah, but I’m not good at anything.”

“That’s not true. You’re pretty good at art, and you’re very talented at writing. Maybe you could be a comic writer one day.” Matt's thick brows furrowed, letting his gaze return to his friend then as he tilted his head.

“I don’t know about that. I don’t have a story to tell.”

Matt moved his hands up in a wild, grand gesture,“ You could scream from the mountain tops how parents shouldn’t be shitty. Show how much it damages someone.”

“There’s been enough media about that already.”

“Yeah, but I think your story is pretty unique.” Matt shrugged absently before looking out the window,” not every day or every summer you build a fucking house with your dad before he’s gone.”

“Yeah, and if I publish it, Mom’ll be pissed and screaming at me again for how I portray her and her exes.”

“It’s just the truth though. They’ve dragged you through fucking hell, dude. Yeah, you have your anger moments and you sometimes say shit that hurts, but it’s not purely malicious. It’s literally because you’re hurting.”

“Okay, don’t turn into Freud.” Sam shook his head, glancing at him.

“It’s the truth, Sam. I know you for you, and I’m happy I’m able to. People have beaten you down so fucking much you think you’re nothing and that isn’t right. You’re really the only person that actually started to talk to me after I moved here from New Mexico. Plus, I know the shit others say about you at school.”

“You had a cool Metallica shirt. I had to say something.”

“And I appreciated it and now you’re stuck with me,” Matt laughed softly, grinning brightly at his friend.

Sam glanced at him, a hint of a smile coming before he shook his head as he pulled into a lot,” more like you’re stuck with me.”

“Nope. You’re stuck with me, motherfucker. I annoy everyone.”

“You’ve never annoyed me … Well, minus when I’m already irritated.”

“That doesn’t count because it’s usually your family or an asshole at school.”

Matt leaned back, and Sam nodded,” yeah. Usually. I can’t wait to fucking graduate … Hopefully I’ll be able to move out fast.”

“You can move out with me when we get jobs and shit. Maybe find a third person to bother the both of us.” He nudged him, grinning as Sam was able to park,” we’ll get you out of there, Sam. You deserve better … Maybe some therapy too. But for now, we get tacos and elote and have a good time.” He moved to slide out as Sam watched him, shaking his head absently before getting out.

They got to the truck, getting in line as the after school rush hit food establishments around town. He was quiet as he looked over the menu, deciding on lengua tacos with a coke. It was such a good combo, he couldn’t help it. Too bad he didn’t have any weed to fucking ascend into another dimension for a bit. He looked to Matt,” what are you gonna get?”

“Probably two beef tacos with jalapeños like normal. If it’s not broke, don’t fix it, know?” He shrugged as he looked up at Sam,” What are you gonna get?”

“The lengua with the green sauce on it.”

“Oh shit dude, you’re like a taco connoisseur.”

“No, I’m not,” he snorted, shaking his head,” it’s just good. Especially with the onions and when you have a cold bottle of Mexican coke.”

“Oh, dude, always the bottle,” Matt grinned again,” fuck it. I’ll try your order. See if you got a good palette.”

“I don’t know about that,” he snorted, shaking his head as he got to the window. He at least knew how to speak the order in Spanish, three shitty years of it coming to his vague aid. He paid in cash, moving to the other window to wait for the order to be called out.

Matt followed along,” this is gonna be so good.”

“Yeah, they also have trays so we’ll get everything on one, then we can sit in the trunk of my car and eat.”

“Sounds good, here, I’ll put our bags in the back seat,” he held his hand out as Sam fished the keys from his pocket, holding it to him.

Matt plucked the keys from his hand, grinning before he started the trek to the car that was a good distance from the food truck. Sam watched him as he absently listened for their order with arms crossed loosely to make sure he made it. Squealing tires soon filled the air as a car turned fast into the lot to barrel through to the other side, and Sam noticed before Matt did, calling out for him.

It was a few seconds too late as Matt was hit by the speeding car that only sped off faster after the collision, a few people screaming as Sam immediately ran over to his friend. “Matt! Fuck. Matt,” he crouched down to see his friend covered in blood with body crushed from the tires. He didn’t hesitate to call for an ambulance, hand shaking. Matt was unconscious already, blood starting to stain his shirt on his side.

Fuck, fuck, fuck.

He stayed beside his friend as the police lingered at the truck for eyewitness testimonies after securing the scene. Luckily, he was allowed to go with Matt to the hospital, watching him closely as he chewed on his thumbnail as he rocked a little. An EMT was focused on driving while another was in the back with them, trying her best to reassure Sam that Matt had a high chance of survival. Sam knew better. That speed and the sounds that came from the impact. Matt would be lucky if he bounced back.

At the hospital, he gave as much information as he could to the receptionist and nurse to contact Matt’s family, but he was soon sitting in the lobby. He pulled his phone out, shakily calling his mother then as he rocked back and forth again, fighting tears back.

She answered in irritation coating her voice while she tried to fix a necklace,” where are you, Sam? It’s late.”

“M-Matt got hit by a car,” he said shakily as he wiped his face. Fuck. However, his voice and tremble caused her to put the pliers down as her irritation melted to worry,” what? Are you okay? Is he okay? What hospital are you at?”

“I’m at Healdsburg General … just in the l-lobby. I'm okay, but I don't know what's happening with him.”

“I’m on my way, did you drive there?”

“No. My car is in a lot … uh ... 34th Avenue near a taco truck. My spare key is in the kitchen.” He leaned back against the back of the chair, staring at the florescent lights until his eyes began to burn.

“Okay, I’ll get Trish to drive it home, but I'll come to you … Do you need anything?” She stood up, glancing at the clock. God, it was already so late.

“F-Food.” He whimpered out as he shut his eyes tightly leaning over his legs.

“Okay, okay. I’ll be there in a moment. Trish will bring your car.” She moved to find Ryan in the back in the pool, calling for him to come with her as Adam looked up from his book as he sat at the patio table.

“Everything okay?”

“Sam’s friend got hit by a car and is in the hospital. I need to have Trish and the two of you help get his car back here while I go to him.”

Sam was still on the line, hearing them as they started to move around the house quickly. Robin soon spoke again to him,” I’ll be there in about an hour and a half, maybe two with traffic. Okay?”

“O-Okay.” He quietly said, sniffling, hanging up only moments later as Robin moved to find the housekeeper. First, she would have to help her find the car before heading to Healdsburg, and hopefully somewhere close was a place that Sam liked to eat from.

Stacy watched from her reception desk, heart softly aching for Sam as she watched him sit with his head in his hands. God, he already seemed in shambles, and he had said he needed food. She absently told Denise she would be back before she moved closer to him, voice soft,” do you want some money for the vending machine while you wait?”

He looked up, nodding while she gave a soft smile,” alright. Hold on.” She moved to the staff room to get $10 out from her purse, pausing to grab some tissues as well. Making her way through the lobby, she saw Sam pathetically leaning his head against the wall, staring blankly at the doors leading into the main hospital. "Here, it's not much, but it's at least something to help you until they come."

He took the tissue box from her first, using up a few to blow his nose and wipe his eyes. “Th-Thank you.”

“And as promised,” she held the bill out,” the machines are down the hall to the left.”

He nodded as he took it, straightening up then with a weakened thanks to her. He got to machines, looking over prices in the soft glow of the lighting before getting a Sprite, Doritos, and barbecue chips. He returned to the lobby, giving Stacy the change with a soft thanks once again before sitting down. Staring at the packaging, he tried to wrap his head around the evening, focusing on food to avoid his head from wandering too much as the harsh crinkling of the package soon echoed in the lobby.

The doctor came out only thirty minutes later, pausing while looking over paperwork. “Sam Monroe?”

Sam lifted his head, giving a little nod as he straightened up. “Yeah?”

“Is Matt’s family here?” Making his way over, Dr. Keller's tall frame gracefully weaved through other patients and family members before the blond was next to Sam.

“No … our families are a bit away. My mom said 90 minutes to two hours. I … don’t know how long it’s been, but I can try to call her.” He started to get his phone out from his pocket after rubbing the barbecue dust off his fingers.

"You don't have to do that Sam." The doctor sat beside him, letting out a slow sigh as he gently placed a hand on Sam’s back,” unfortunately … Matt has passed away from his injuries.”

Sam stared at him as he stopped, brows furrowing as he blinked rapidly,” I don’t understand.”

“His ribs punctured his lungs in three different places, his spine was shattered and had a lot of internal organs bleeding from the hit.”

Sam shook his head,” no. No. No. ” His voice started to get desperate," he can't be gone. He's the stronger one out of the both of us. He can't fucking die from a fucking car!"

Dr. Keller’s lips pursed as he watched as the tears started to fall again, pulling his hand back cautiously as he started to try to comfort him.

Standing up, Sam's hands started to shake,” Fuck.” God, I could really use a fucking blunt right now. Ignoring the doctor, he moved outside before he started to hit at one of the columns with his fist to at least avoid some public humiliation,” fuck, fuck, fuck!” His knuckles soon were bloody and aching from the concrete tearing the skin before he crouched down, tucking his hands into his chest. "FUCK." His shoulders started to tremble and chest began to ache as he started to sob, trying to stay quiet.

The doors to the ER soon opened, and Dr. Keller slowly made his way over after telling security that it was alright. He's just grieving. He's just a teenager. It's a lot for him right now. Leaning over to place his hand against his back gently, his voice was gentle,” come back in, Sam. I’ll get your hand bandaged up. You can’t have an infection or leave that exposed.” Taking a moment, he knew that the doctor was right, soon following in one of the side rooms to get his hand wrapped.

Dr. Keller softly spoke as he started to clean the pale knuckles,” I can see he meant a lot to you Sam. I’m sorry we couldn’t have done more, but I’m assuming the car was traveling at a high speed.”

“It w-was,” he choked out,” it happened too f-fast. One m-moment he was heading to m-my car, and another he was on the fucking ground.” Breaths were unsteady as his brows scrunch in pain while his knuckles were disinfected, hissing out softly in pain.

"You're going great, Sam. I need to make sure it's cleaned up before I can put any ointment on it. Looks like you got some particles actually in the wound," Keller lifted up the cotton ball with his gloved hand, looking at the little specks of dirt he had cleaned off from the wound. "Unfortunately for hit and runs, it's common. It's rare that aid is ever given."

“Can I see him? ... Please?" Blue eyes lifted up to the doctor for a brief moment before watching the cotton ball be discarded.

“I don’t suggest it,” he shook his head,” that would be the last memory you have of him. That impacts a lot of people more negatively than if they didn’t, even if they witnessed the trauma.”

“I’m going to see him at his funeral,” Sam grumbled out, wincing again as a gauze pad was placed on top of his knuckles.

“Yes, but with that, he is at least prepared for viewing ... wounds are mended with putty and makeup to make him presentable. Right now, it’s the early stages and frankly, he looks like hell. I don’t suggest it, Sam. Please.” Green eyes were gentle towards the teenager as he gave a soft pat to his forearm, offering a weakened smile to try to comfort him from the loss.

Sam watched him for a moment as he started to wrap his hand up,” … Okay… I won’t.”

“Good. I promise it will be better in the long run for you.” He got the wrapping secured, standing,” come on. Let’s go back to the lobby.” As they got out, the families were there, and Sam moved to his mother who held a McDonald’s bag in hand,” Sam.” She held onto him as he buried his face into her shoulder, and the doctor moved to Matt’s family, delivering the somber news. His mothers started to cry, holding onto each other as his biological mother wept into her partner’s shoulder.

Sam took a moment to pull away as they looked at him, Mary’s voice soft,” thank you for coming here with him, Sam. I know you meant a lot to him.” Sam only moved to hold onto her, and Jessica held onto the both of them. They soon ushered Sam to go back home and rest and they’ll tell him details for the funeral. He had waited long enough for them to just arrive. He took a moment, but Robin softly reassured him that it was okay and that there was nothing else he could do. However, she asked how much it would be to pay for bandaging his knuckles and the doctor dismissed it,” don’t worry about it Ms. Monroe. Just get home safely.” They gave another hug to Jessica and Mary before they headed out of the hospital.

He somberly followed her back out as she passed the bag to him,” two cheeseburgers and fries with honey mustard. No pickles. I have a Coke in the car for you.” He nodded as she got him there, texting Adam and Ryan that they were on their way back before she restarted her car.

On the drive, he was slow to eat, but he ate everything. God. Winter break was going to be the worst. He shut his eyes as Robin glanced over at him, voice soft,” just rest, Sam. I’ll wake you when we get home.”

He moved the seat back to lay down all the way back as she turned the radio off, letting him fall asleep. She was more worried now. Sam had at least been a bit more tolerable with having Matt around, but now he was gone. Not only was he gone, but the night was traumatic for her son. She only wondered how this would affect him and if he would be worse. She couldn’t handle the havoc of Sam anymore. She really couldn’t.

When they were home, Sam at least took care of his trash before Trish gave him the key to his car,” I also found the original, it’s in the glovebox for now.” Sam just slowly nodded at the housekeeper, softly thanking her for her help. He moved up the stairs to his bedroom, getting the key on his shelf unit that had his CDs and record player before he moved to his bed after shutting the door. He thought a moment before working off his shoes and socks, getting at least his shirt changed before he crawled into bed.

It never seemed to end. Would it? It felt endless.

He got settled in bed, getting himself bundled up in his maroon comforter before he was asleep once again.

Winter break and the rest of senior year was difficult for him, but since he had clearly been through something, luckily most teachers were understanding and more than happy to help him. As he graduated, he only hoped that Matt was there. Somewhere in the crowd watching as he walked across the stage and out of high school. Maybe it could end now. Maybe it could be better…. Just maybe.

#.pdf #sam monroe #sam monroe fanfiction #life as a house #aching body series

13 notes · View notes

indigothreads · 2 years

Text

john gaius will look at ozymandias king of kings and say is anyone gonna become that and not wait for an answer

#nona the ninth #john gaius #ntn spoilers #atn is for real just going to be the second coming. and what rough beast its hour comes at last. et cetera et cetera #.pdf

346 notes · View notes

meat-pvppet · 6 months

Text

MAGNA ENTERS, STAGE LEFT

AKA. the day Magna put on a headset and got isekaid

Darkness.

. . . No . . . not darkness . . .

Just a sort of . . .

Nothing.

And then suddenly . . .

Music.

Color.

Bright f@#!ing color everywhere.

He squinted as his eyes adjusted. He looked around to the technicolor world he's found himself in. He was . . . on a stage? In what looks to be a circus tent filled with various upscaled children’s toys and a massive primary-colored . . . pipe slide?

A huge eyeball flies past him, followed by a tea set which causes him to stumble backwards from how quickly they all go past. They all join some other flying objects in a weird sort of discordant dance as they seemed to pack themselves away. And there were . . . weird looking characters talking amongst themselves.

He noticed there were two chess pieces with eyes and floating disembodied hands in robes, one a white king while the other a black queen. There was also a walking, talking ragdoll, with short red hair and a bright blue dress. Standing by the doll was a tall and lanky purple hare grinning widely with yellow eyes and teeth, wearing pink overalls and yellow gloves. There was even a clown, complete with red lipstick and blue eye make-up, wearing a yellow hat with red and blue accents with a matching outfit.

It was all . . . weirdly fun looking, but he was too wrapped up in his own confusion of what he was watching.

What was going on? He just put on that headset and now . . .

Headset. Right. He could just take it off, regain his composure, then come back, couldn't he?

He started to paw at the sides of his head to find . . . nothing. Nothing but a very . . . wood texture where flesh and hair was supposed to be, a hat that he doesn't remember putting on . . . and the indentations of a second, third and fourth face on the sides of his head.

That made a shot of ice go down his spine.

He dared to look down at himself for a moment.

What he saw . . . wasn’t his body. He was wearing a nice yellow suit with red accents on its sleeves and tails, a blue vest and a red bow, but . . . his body itself looked like it was carved straight out of a tree; all wood grain, paint and varnish.

Only now could he notice the strings attached to his wrists and feet that disappeared high beyond the ceiling above him, held taut despite any movement he made upward to relieve its tension.

. . . Ok.

Ok.

Ok, ok, ok.

Freaky.

Really, really, REALLY freaky, but that's ok!

He's ok.

Maybe . . . maybe the headset is just really good at tricking him into thinking this was really all in front of him! And that he was some kind of wood puppet and had two other faces on the sides of his head! Yeah, that has to be it, otherwise . . .

Otherwise . . .

Suddenly, there was a voice from just above him that made him jump.

“My, my!” The voice started, sounding surprised, as he looked up to the source.

Looking back down at him were a floating pair of eyes between a set of teeth and gums. A top hat with a red ribbon sat on the top set of teeth. He sported a red tailcoat with black lapels and a bow tie to match.

Weird.

He pointed the cane he held to him to emphasize his words as he continued.

“It seems a new human has entered this realm!”

The eyes of all the varied characters were on him now. It gave him a weird sense of performance anxiety honestly, making him freeze up.

They all looked to him expectantly before someone chimed in.

“Really? Cuz he looks more like a badly painted NPC,” the purple rabbit quipped with a chuckle as he looked over him.

Confusion, a bit of self-consciousness over his paint job, and maybe a tinge of annoyance washed over him. He wasn't sure whether to laugh it off or argue that he was, in fact, a real person trapped in this bizarre, colorful world . . . if it even mattered to the rabbit. It probably didn’t.

“Jax, be nice,” the ragdoll scolded. “He’s probably going through a lot right now.”

“You could say that,” he murmured under his breath.

He addressed the floating set of eyes and teeth as he seemed to be the de facto . . . spokesperson(?) of the group, looking up to him.

“Hey uh . . . can you tell me what’s going on?”

He adjusted his top hat with a flourish before replying, “Well, my friend, you’ve found yourself in the AMAZING DIGITAL CIRCUS!”

He spun in the air, causing his body to twist cartoonishly, as he outstretched his arms dramatically as the text “THE AMAZING DIGITAL CIRCUS” appeared above him, then disappeared after a moment as he continued speaking, gesturing to each person as he introduced them.

“I’m Caine, your ringmaster, and your new friends, Kinger, Queenie, Ragatha, Jax and Kaufmo! You’ve entered a world of WONDERS, where ANYTHING can happen!”

There was silence for a moment as Caine seemed to await his reaction. He hesitated before he spoke again.

“. . . Right. Cool. Uh . . . how is this . . . This is a pretty good simulation and all, but uh . . . is there, like . . . a menu I can open to exit? Or pause?”

This caused Caine to stammer for a moment, while the others looked among each other nervously, each muttering a “well . . .” or an “uh . . .” or some kind of variation.

“Well,” Caine began, trying to think of a way to put it. “There . . . isn’t a menu. Or a pause button per se . . .”

There was silence for a good moment . . . before Caine added, “. . . or an exit.”

. . .

“Excuse me?”

“Yep,” Jax added, stepping close to him and inspecting his strings for a moment, deciding to grab hold of it, using it to dangle around his hand like a child with a new toy. “We’ve been stuck here for a while now. We’d have all left by now if there was a way to leave.”

He couldn’t stop his expression from shifting to one of horror. Literally. He could feel his head physically spin around and then settle again. This seemed to entertain the purple rabbit.

“Woah, didn’t know it could do that!” He laughed in amusement at the discovery.

Meanwhile, an ice-cold anxious chill slowly spread out from his spine and around his back, making his limbs feel heavy as he grappled with the implications of this.

So . . . he was trapped here. With no way out. With other people who’ve tried and failed to leave.

He sunk down to a squat on the floor as he held his head.

Oh god. He was trapped here. With no way out.

"Now, now, no need to fret, my friend!” Caine spoke up once more, trying to reassure him as he flourished his cane, “While there's no menu or pause button, you can still enjoy the wonders of this world! We're all here together, and we've made the best of it, haven't we?”

He looked up to Caine and stared for a moment before sighing. He could feel his head spin again and settle as he resigned himself to this.

“Alright,” he muttered, “don’t have much of a choice anyway.”

“That’s the spirit!” Caine exclaimed happily as he clapped him on the back. “You’ll love it here, I promise! Now let’s talk about some other matters, like your name!”

Oh, right. He hasn’t told them his name yet.

“Oh, my name is . . .”

. . .

“My . . . name is . . .”

. . .

Wait.

What was his name? Why would he forget something like his name?

He began to panic as he tried to remember. He had to at least know his name, right?

Now that he thought about it . . . he wasn’t really sure if he could even remember what he was doing before he put on that headset . . . or anything in particular about his life before all this. As he searched his memories, he couldn't shake the feeling that there was a void where his past should be. It was like trying to grasp smoke – every time he thought he was getting close to a memory, it slipped away.

“What’s wrong, newbie? Can’t remember your own name?” Jax spoke up, a mocking grin spread across his face as he let go of his strings and crossed his arms.

Ok, this guy was kinda getting on his nerves, but he tried not to let that show. These sorts of people usually get more satisfaction out of it when they actually get a rise out of you after all.

"I... I don't know," he admitted, his voice trembling slightly. "It's like my memory is all fuzzy, and I can't remember much about who I am or what I was doing before I ended up here."

Ragatha stepped closer; her expression filled with empathy. "That's okay, newbie. We've all had our fair share of memory troubles here. It's one of the quirks of this place."

Caine nodded in agreement. "Indeed! The past tends to become a bit... hazy for newcomers.”

That’s just f@#%ing concerning . . .

“But don't worry; we can help you choose a new name!”

He quirked a brow at this as the others began to make suggestions.

"He looks like a Henry to me," Kinger suggested.

"Or maybe a Chris?” Queenie chimed in.

"Poppet?" Ragatha offered with a smile.

Kaufmo added, "How about Woody?"

Jax couldn't resist a quip, "Pinocchio?"

He couldn't help but roll his eyes at some of the suggestions. The situation was already surreal, and now he had his new circus companions trying to rename him. It felt like a small attempt to regain a sense of control in this unpredictable world.

“Alright, alright,” he said with a hint of exasperation as he racked his brain for a name. “How about . . . Magna?”

Jax couldn't resist taking another jab as he chuckled, "Magna? Seriously?"

“I think it’s fitting. ‘Magna the Magician’ . . . since . . . ya know.” He gestures to his outfit vaguely. It did look a lot like that of a performer, which would be good if this really was a circus. It kinda felt more like a freakshow, but whatever.

“Magna it is, then!” Caine chimed in.

And so, Magna it was.

He tried his best to accept his situation and the quirky bunch of companions he found himself with. It was hard to deny the bizarre charm of the place, even if it was disconcerting. He had no choice but to adapt and find some way to make the best of it . . . and of course, a way to get out of there.

Sure, he had people here, adventures, whole “feasts” with “friends”, but he had a life outside of this one, and he wasn’t about to give up on that. Not yet at least.

15 notes · View notes

nero1forte · 2 months

Text

new series time: persona 4 funnies ! enjoy the food

#.pdf #persona #persona 4 #yu narukami #persona 4 golden #souji seta #yosuke hanamura #chie satonaka #yukiko amagi #kanji tatsumi #rise kujikawa #naoto shirogane #teddie #teddie persona 4 #p4 #tohru adachi #ryotaro dojima #adachi tohru #dojima ryotaro

315 notes · View notes

spectrology · 10 months

Text

embarking on a mission to popularize the common name for the "new" pasta (cascatelli) as "goose tongue pasta"

319 notes · View notes

databent · 2 years

Text

organisms LOVE to adapt to environments

#organisms will literally just adapt to an environment. love to see it #rd #.pdf

1K notes · View notes

sithskywalkerr · 2 months

Text

if the suspense doesn’t kill you, something else will.

Summary: Vader believes his wife Padmé and their children are dead, but Padmé is alive and well. While she’s in hiding, senses Anakin's presence in the Force and believes he may be the mysterious Vader upon realization five years after the twins are born. Meanwhile, Anakin senses Padmé's presence but is convinced by Emperor Palpatine that it's a hallucination. Despite this, he remains hopeful and is determined to prove that his wife and children are alive. The Flowers Never Bloom Characters: Anakin Skywalker, Padmé Amidala, Obi-Wan Kenobi, Ahsoka Tano, Sheev Palpatine, Luminara Unduli, Luke Skywalker, Leia Organa Warnings: graphic depictions of violence, minor character death, blood, slight gore, cannibalism Ships: Anidala Word Count: 7k words A/N: Hello all! Okay, so I wanted to get this out before March, and idk what bug infected my brain the last week, but here we are!! The boy!!! The bb!!! Of course, this has the birth of the twins, and it's lightly skimmed over detail wise, so if you don't like that kinda thing, it's cool. I get it. Per usual, Anakin is suffering and so is Padmé. Also, don't hold how the kids are against me. My reference is Bluey, and the insp for Luminara's death was Frankenstein. 😭 Read here on ao3

The cool air of Umgul soothed his slowly healing skin exposed to the elements, but Vader was soon stopped on his bike by the rising mountains that threatened the beginning of an easy hunt. Nothing could be straightforward. He knew that defeating Luminara would not be easy without a saber, and his body ached from the replaced cybernetic in his right arm. Even with the ache, he had an advantage of brute strength and speed. That could easily be used against the older Jedi if he could lure her into a cave or dead end. One would make it out alive, and he needed to ensure it was himself.

For Padmé.

For their baby.

Shaking the past and future from his head, yellowed eyes glancing around the rough face of the mountains with various creatures milling around while bellowing over the lush grass. Once before, he may have toyed with the idea of chasing them, terrorizing them for simple fun, but now he had a complete disinterest in Umgul’s various animals. The cooling air stung at his exposed skin as he climbed up, steps nearly silent as he followed the Force signature that Luminara had left behind while the air thinned. He absently hit a button within the mask, ensuring a higher oxygen output was given to him while he climbed higher.

Luminara may have forced herself to be thrown into the Diseased territory, but as she observed this pursuer, there was little to calm the dread that began to well up from her belly. It threatened to claw at her throat and blind her eyes to the present, but she kept moving forward. With the news of the death of Windu given across the Jedi’s frequency, she knew she was one of the remaining few. If she had to, she would have to hide to preserve the Order, the Jedi, and the planet from its collapse if she could locate others. She had to survive.

Bright navy eyes watched as the black-clad Sith made his advance, moving more fluidly than a human but not as bumbling as other infected folk had. This only boiled the dread to move into her throat, her chest beginning to prickle with its darkness. No. Keep moving. She could have a better chance if she could find a shallow cave. Then, she could be able to escape. Dark boots carried her across the greenery, shedding her outer layers of the Jedi robes for faster movement. She crossed the paths with more extensive caves, uneasy about waltzing in for safety when the local qiuak was known to defend it’s territory viciously.

Glancing back, she was relieved to see she wasn’t in sight, so she decided to go in only briefly to try to lead the pursuer to a demise. While protecting life was crucial to the Jedi’s beliefs, she could strongly feel the dark energy from the individual and knew that it was kill or be killed. The Sith were back, and it was detrimental to the fate of the weakened Republic, though now, she was sure that the Republic didn’t exist. Not with so many Jedi dead. However, the Force had been giving her nudges and whispers as she left the cave after leaving the false clue.

That darkness following her was familiar, something she had seen in the Clone Wars, yet she couldn’t place it. Mentally, she softly whispered to the Force for clarity, making her way out of the cave swiftly when she heard stirring deeper in the cave from a qiuak. Exiting the gloomy, chilled air, her searching eyes spotted storms coming from the west, and there was still no sign of her pursuer. The rains would make her progress slow, with the rocks becoming slippery and unstable if there was a torrential downpour. She had to find a shallow cave and fast.

Hopping down from the platform, Luminara carefully moved along the cliffside to climb higher, getting onto a flattened plateau to momentarily catch her breath. Closing her eyes, she meditated, slowing her heart and breathing while her body slowly relaxed. Her Master would be proud of how far she’s come, but what good would that be if she didn’t survive?

The evil that threatened her suddenly was closer, threatening to suffocate her as she opened her eyes and turned to see the masked figure standing meters away while he watched her meditate. Her eyes stayed on him while his head slowly tilted, observing her as she took a hesitating step back while looking the figure over.

Vader continued to assess her while she desperately tried to figure out something. Yet, why had she chosen to take the opportunity to pause and meditate? Even when being pursued? Hadn’t Obi-Wan mentioned that Qui-Gon had done the same thing before his fateful duel with Maul? Perhaps he would come out victorious this time, even without a lightsaber. He watched while the glimmer of recognition sparked in her eyes, her heart only catching in her chest as she realized who she had been trailed by.

“Anakin … what happened to you?” Her voice was barely a whisper as she straightened up, hand instinctively going to the hilt of her saber. She found her resolve, voice louder now, accusatory, “You killed Mace?”

He stood in front of her silently, mind working through possible outcomes, but the one that seemed most effective would be to attack her from behind to avoid being hit by the saber. Either way, he will be victorious, and she and the rest of the Jedi will be eradicated. Finally, he spoke,” Anakin is dead, just as you will have the same fate.”

“Why have you done this? The Order has only given you a home,” she grasped the hilt tighter before letting the bright green hum of the blade ignite.

A short, cracked laugh escaped through the modulator, his head slowly tilting downwards while he kept his gaze on her. A home would not leave Ahsoka behind when her whereabouts were unclear. They would not hoard the Diseased and barely keep them alive. The unwavering gaze he had given her only fed into the deepening dread as thunder began to crackle. “The Temple was never my home.”

Padmé is.

Luminara knew arguing with him was futile, but as the rain began to fall, her headdress only darkened with the raindrops as they stared at each other. Yet, there was one thing that Luminara could speak to him about, try to bring him to peace. It was her last chance of reasoning, not when Anakin had done so much good in the Clone Wars. He had even been stubborn enough to ensure Barriss and Ahsoka’s return after a high-stakes mission that she was ready to walk away from.

“What happened with Ahsoka was never your fault, but it was ours for not seeking her out immediately. I know you have always held animosity towards me because of Barriss’s actions against the Order, and I am sorry for the damage it has caused.” She hoped it could bridge the gap and give him the smallest amount of sympathy she needed, but he remained unreadable.

Yet, the darkening energy was all she needed to confirm he was lost while he began to stalk around her to try to get behind. She had to think of her survival, not seeking his forgiveness for the Order’s failings. He made a false attack to lure her into action, and she immediately swiped towards him as her fear spiked at seeing how much larger he was. Dear Maker, what had happened to him since his disappearance? The dangerous dance began, and she tried to keep herself from killing him, opting to try to just damage him enough to escape. Singed skin ached as the cold rain turned the scarred skin purple in hue at the chill, yellow eyes only seeming to glow in the darkness of the storm as he backed away for a moment while his left arm ached with the saber’s burn.

Luminara watched while he reached up, undoing the bands on the mask to drop it onto the ground as her heart fell into her stomach. No. Her eyes took in the gnarled skin of his face, the sharp teeth exposed from the healed gash on his cheek, and his strong jaw absently popping while the hunger began to gnaw at him again.

“Anakin, what happened?”

“Obi-Wan,” Vader said simply before advancing in blinded rage, the darkness around him suffocating while he charged. She took a step back, eyes wide, before swinging at his right leg, slicing the limb off, which caused him to fall from the sudden imbalance. While falling, metal fingers grasped onto her robes, dragging her down with him while he gave an inhuman growl. Beginning to lift her hand up again for another strike, Luminara soon cried out in pain when he grabbed her wrist and shattered the joint beneath his grasp.

“Anakin, please stop,” she protested, dread only filling her as she saw the feral traits of the Diseased in him while he moved to pin her down after disposing the lightsaber to the side. Large hands moved to her throat, and without any thought or pause, the her vertebrae was soon shattered from the strength as the light left her eyes.

While the rain continued to fall, it wasn’t long before the water began to mix with blood spilling over the sides and down the cliffsides while his fingers tore apart fabric and flesh. The scent of blood began to attract other infected, crawling out of the various caves they hid in from the rain before spotting him feeding. One of the younger ones was brave enough to try to approach, and a low, growl of warning soon emitted when Vader paused his feeding, yellow eyes boring into the teenager with sharp, bloody teeth bared.

“Come on, Padmé, leaving a party early won’t affect how the Senate sees you,” Anakin purred out while pressing against his wife again after another governor had left their vicinity.

Padmé softly scoffed, trying to suppress her smile as softened eyes moved up to look at him,” You say that every time. People are beginning to notice, Ani.”

“So we leave at different times then and meet at your apartment.” Tilting his head, he gave her a crooked grin, one he knew that she couldn’t resist. “I bet I can get there before you do, Senator.”

A soft voice pulled his wife from the memory, and Padmé let her gaze return to Ahsoka while the Jedi gently grabbed her hand. “I’m sorry, Padmé … but we believe that Anakin is dead. Obi-Wan couldn’t find anything.”

Dead.

How easy could it be for them to admit that? She knew the Order had refused to search for Ahsoka, and now she could only believe they would refuse to search for Anakin. While he was one of their best warriors, there was still no doubt about their lingering apprehension towards him. Though, now, she could see it was not without a good reason. Not only had the Sith come into power, but the Republic crumbled into nothing within only a week. Obi-Wan had gone on a mission to relocate Anakin when Padmé begged him to, but only if she and Ahsoka had stayed in Alderaan.

“I don’t believe he’s gone … I know he isn’t,” Padmé spoke with determination, sitting up straighter as much as she could within the final month of her pregnancy. At least through the chaos of it all, the twins were healthy. “I’ve felt little prods from him through the Force. My husband is still alive.”

Ahsoka knew it was a losing battle when Padmé was just as bullheaded as her Master, and if he was alive, he would do anything in his power to find them again. She knew that. They had to wait. No matter how long and excruciating it would be, they had to. “I’ve tried to locate him, and Obi-Wan has attempted as well, Padmé, but his signature is so weak.”

“It has changed. I don’t know how to describe it, but Anakin would be the only one to seek me out in the Force.”

“Padmé, we also have reason to believe that Palpatine could be toying with you and trying to locate us,” Ahsoka moved to sit down, shoulders falling. At the same time, she absently played with some of her twists,” I hope Obi-Wan can at least confirm he’s alive. Then, we can begin to formulate a plan.”

Padme’s personal datapad lit up, and she leaned forward, carefully maneuvering around how large her belly had gotten. Leave it to Anakin to give her twins. Still, she was as happy and excited as she could until dread crept into her chest.” The Emperor has an announcement tomorrow.”

Ahsoka’s brows furrowed as she carefully moved closer,” about what?”

Padme showed her the article, her husband lingering in the back of an official photo with the half mask on, adorned in black. “Bringing Coruscant back, but I need a doctor right now.” She slammed the datapad onto the table too harshly as Ahsoka watched, confused, before she finally admitted,” The twins are coming.”

Oh, Maker, help us.

Vader lingered bored near the Emperor while grand, elaborate celebration preparations had begun, the new saber of black and shining silver attached to his hip. At the same time, he watched the influx of people returning to Coruscant within the streets below. The promise of safety caused enough relief to bring the capitol back onto its feet, but the infected still ravaged the lower levels which only caused construction to stretch higher into the heavens.

“Vader, I want you to ensure the lower-level shields are in place,” Sidious crooned while inspecting a banner’s fabric. Planning for celebration only reminded him of when Naboo had theirs in the joy of being free from the Trade Federation.

Turning at his voice, the apprentice watched as he made final selections, facing Vader again afterward while Sidious’s face seemed to fall into grief. “But, I do have unfortunate news for you, my friend. In last month’s chaos, we have confirmation that Padmé was killed after you encountered her and Kenobi in Kuat. They never made it to their destination.”

“I have felt her through the Force,” he began, pausing as a gnarled hand was raised.

“Try again, my apprentice.”

Unreadable eyes stared at him a moment before closing as he reached out to Padmé again, trying to find her signature. If he recalled correctly, it was something closer to Alderaan. Perhaps that was the place he truly needed to go. Yet, he was greeted with nothing.

Sidious watched, turning to hide his pleased smile while he blocked how far Anakin could reach through the Force, making him unable to find her. That could be another task to set into an experiment. After all, he couldn’t babysit his miserable apprentice all the time, not when he had a planet to rule over.

Vader’s eyes reopened, agony washing into his chest, but he would provide his own investigation. He was unaware of how far the Emperor had planned to ensure she would never be found by her husband, and he straightened, squaring his broad shoulders.

Back to work. “The shields will keep the infected from climbing and ruining your evening.”

“Good, I know that I can count on you, and again, my boy,” a hand moved onto Vader’s shoulder,” I am genuinely sorry. Losing Senator Amidala is a tragedy we all mourn.”

Yellow eyes stared at Sidious momentarily before he pulled away, giving a slight bow of his head. Silently, Vader exited the office, roughly shoving droids out of his way while moving down the halls to the landing pad for a speeder to check all of the shield ports.

If Padmé was dead, did that mean that Obi-Wan was as well? Brow muscles furrowed while he got into an elevator, hitting the button for the lowest dock of the building. Once the doors closed, his shoulders slumped, his hand moving up to hide his eyes while they closed as the tears threatened while trying to reach out for Padmé again.

Nothing.

While Padmé was in labor, Bail, R2, and 3-PO observed outside of the room while Breha held onto Padme’s hand with Ahsoka by her side. “Obi-Wan is trying to make it here for the delivery, but he says ‘no promises.’”

“Obi-Wan being present is the least of my worries,” Padmé softly winced at the pain,” has Yoda been contacted to help keep the twins’s signature from being noticed?”

“Yes, he’s about to arrive, and if Obi-Wan can—”” I’m here,” Obi-Wan said as he rushed into the room, eyes soft as Padmé reached out to him while Yoda followed closely behind. The joy couldn’t be hidden from his features as he stood beside Obi-Wan, but hiding the force signature would be a feat within the delivery itself.

“I’ll be damned if I missed the birth of the twins,” he softly said, heart still aching since he saw the article on one of the newsstands in the capitol of Alderaan. “We need to focus on the birth and protection of you and the twins, Padmé. We can worry about everything else afterward, but not when they’re about to come into the world.”

Yoda nodded firmly, gently placing a hand on Padme’s arm for reassurance before he signed to Obi-Wan,” Focus on the Force around her, we must. Intelligent, Sidious is.”

The Jedi nodded, looking back to Padmé as a cry of pain escaped while the midwife droid alerted the first baby was coming. Yoda went meditatively while focusing on protecting the family, and Obi-Wan forced himself to close his eyes, focusing on aiding and strengthening the shield. At the same time, cries filled the room when the first baby was born.

The droid spoke softly while handing the wrapped baby to Ahsoka,” It’s a boy.”

“I’m telling you, Ani, it’s a boy. I’m sure of it.”

“Oh yeah, and how do you know?” Her husband grinned, eyes bright in the softened light of the balcony, watching as she swayed to hearing one of the clubs blast their music a little too loud.

“Motherly instinct … and, if it is a boy, I would like to name him Luke.”

“Luke? That was a fast pick,” he teased while walking closer, softly moving to hold onto her.

“In some older Alderaanian scripts and folklore, a character named Luke is a healer. He helped the peace settle and the birth of many technological advancements. Many believe that Alderaan was the beginning of the enlightenment for the rest of the planet, and I had to study it extensively in Naboo before I became queen. Without their actions, we wouldn’t be where we are. It’s fascinating, and besides … Luke Amidala Skywalker has a nice ring to it.”

Anakin laughed softly, leaning his jaw softly onto her shoulder,” I didn’t know Alderaanian history was the beginning of what we have. Maybe one day you can take me there to learn it better.”

Padmé watched the boy in Ahsoka’s arms while her blue eyes softened. Dark eyes pricked in tears that soon spilled over while Padmé’s voice cracked,” Luke.” Taking gasping breaths, she grasped onto the side of the delivery table, crying out weakly. Maker, help me. Protect us, protect my family and my husband. She cried out again while the droid had to assist the second baby, gently wrapping her up in a soft towel,” The second is a girl.”

“Oh, I’m sure it’s a girl,” Anakin grinned while his warm palm brushed over the oiled skin of Padme’s belly while she brushed her hair. “With your cravings and these kicks' strength, it’s definitely a girl.”

Blue eyes were alight as Padmé only grinned at him, voice soft while facing him more,” And if it is, what would her name be?”

He thought a moment, thinking back to the tales of those freed in Tatooine, and he leaned down to softly kiss the skin,” Leia.”

“Leia. It’s beautiful. Does it have meaning to you?”

“An old Tatooine tale, one of the first freed slaves to escape and survive. Mom used to tell it to me all the time, try to keep my spirits up, y’know?”

Padmé softened, leaning down to kiss his head while resting his cheek on her belly,” I’m still sure it’s a boy.” She grinned, eyes alight with her teasing as she softly brushed her fingers through his hair.

“You want to make a wager to that?” He laughed, lifting his head carefully with softened features before leaning forward to kiss her sweetly.

“Leia,” Padmé gasped, body aching from the delivery as Yoda’s brows furrowed in his meditative state. There was a darkness starting to prod, but it wasn’t something he had found from Palpatine months earlier, and it wasn’t like any other user he encountered. Still, there was something, but it didn’t seem focused on Padmé.

Obi-Wan stiffened at the prods in the force before agony erupted through his body as if it was enveloped in flames, feeling as if all of the air was sucked out of his lungs. Anakin.

A sign, a little nudge, anything that could give him hope would have made it worth it, but Vader decided to search for Obi-Wan. He sensed he was near Yoda, yet there was a strange barrier he had never experienced before, but Obi-Wan foolishly let him close. The rage sparked back into his chest at the confirmation of Obi-Wan living. However, he still found it difficult to believe that his former Master would live a seemingly horrifying accident as Palpatine had explained, but his wife did not?

The shields were confirmed to be operational, so for now, he returned to the abandoned apartment; using the spare key, he had to enter with a slow sigh as he was greeted with a new emptiness. A slow, soft sigh escaped behind the mask before he shut and locked the door behind himself and removed the half mask that began to imprint on his face.

Yellowed eyes miserably scanned around, hoping for any sign of her ready to come out in greeting before moving through the familiar layout to her room. Pausing in the doorway, Anakin noticed some items were strangely out of place, brows furrowing as he moved inside. The bedding wasn’t straightened out after she lay or sat on it — presumptuously, and her datapad was to the side. Moving out to peek into the hall, he noticed the cameras weren’t operational either, the usual blinking red dot absent as he saw the state of the apartment.

She left in a hurry. Had she been threatened? Was another bounty hunter after her?

Returning to her bedroom, he began to inspect the vanity and the walk-in wardrobe, noticing more of her comfortable clothes missing and a few favorites of hers also absent. His eyes narrowed as he moved through the rest of the apartment, unable to find any indication of where she could have gone.

Maker, keep her safe.

Five long, torturous years had passed, and the state of the planet was on the few hinges of what remained enough to provide adequate resources, but they were swiftly depleted by the Empire's never-ending need. The infected ravaged most of the lands, yet Coruscant was now a safe haven that kept building towards the skies. Alderaan was one of the few regions that also prospered, and Padmé was one of the reasons for its continued success. Still, she had to remain hidden to keep up the rouse that she had been killed, and it kept the twins safe.

She listened to Bail's recap of the Senate's call for ecological change and the Emperor's disdain for the call to action. Absently playing with her pen, she knew that if a cure could be utilized to regain the land, the current production areas wouldn't be as stressed and thinned. It wasn't a total loss, especially after the collapse of Kessel's mines. Not when the enslaved had also been freed upon using the opportunity to evacuate. However, there were whispers that the mines' destruction was intentional. Perhaps, even an uprising.

Returning to the present, when Bail softly spoke her name as other officials were dismissed, she lifted her gaze to his familiar kind features as he sat near her. "Welcome back to the present … what are you thinking about?"

A soft sigh escaped her while she let her shoulders slump," have we confirmed if the Kessel mining collapse was accidental?"

"I haven't heard any updates, but I also heard about the refugees making it to Alderaan. They will be safe while here … but we had new reports of extensive deliveries sent to Mustafar while they were freed.

Some kind of fortress finishing being constructed for Vader."

She scoffed then," Oh, he needs a fortress now? Lovely. Think he'll run holiday specials on the extra rooms?" She was unaware of who Vader was, and that Obi-Wan omitted that crucial information from her. She would risk everything if she knew where her husband was, and it was something he didn't think he could live with, not after seeing what Anakin had become.

Bail only shook his head,” One can hope not … though, it does seem to be constructed near the former compound where Dooku and Windu’s remains were found. This … Vader we know is the Emperor's right hand, so there must be a reason for Mustafar’s location being utilized.”

“Then we should lure him somewhere to put a blaster bolt through his head.”

Dark brows lifted briefly while giving her a disapproving look, causing her to sigh,” Fine. We won’t besides, you know I won’t do it. Not if it can’t be helped, but as you said, Vader does the bidding.”

“Even then, a simple blaster will not do harm since there are reports of him being infected. He is the sole reason many of our armies are decimated so easily once he’s on a rampage,” the Senator leaned back, folding his hands together while pursing his lips. “However, there is still a great mystery around him. No one knows who he is, where he came from, or how he knows the Emperor. I also haven’t heard anything new regarding Anakin. I believe he might be lost with some other infected in a region somewhere.”

“I will find him, Bail,” she said simply, standing up before she paused at a memory she had repressed for so long at the last interaction with her husband. “I … may know who Vader is.”

Straightening, Bail’s attention was entirely on the hidden Senator, voice soft,” Who, Padmé?”

“When Obi-Wan and I were evacuating Coruscant,” she swallowed, her throat dry and thick as cotton while dread of admission filled her chest,” we ran into Anakin one more time in Kuat. We were going through the industry district, and he caught up with us and managed to stop the speeder.”

Worry fell over his features while he watched her eyes scan around the now empty room,” I noticed his movements were far different than other infected individuals. He wasn’t erratic, nor did he have any apparent cognition issues; instead, he was graceful. He also recognized me. Obi-Wan then revealed that Anakin pledged himself to Palpatine, who we now know is the Emperor. I never put it together because afterward, Anakin was engulfed in flames, and we both presumed he had died from the injuries. Now, I fear he did live.”

Now, Bail understood why Obi-Wan was adamant about keeping Padmé from finding Anakin — even if it was because of the twins. His heart ached deeply for her, but if it was true and Vader was Anakin, there was no guarantee that he would still recognize her or that she would be safe. “Padmé, please, listen to me. Do not go to Mustafar. The air is inhabitable; if it is Anakin, he is dangerous.”

“Hasn’t he always been?” She drummed her fingers against the back of the chair she had been standing in before moving to the large windows, overviewing the city,” I want him back. I want him with us. If it is my husband, I cannot freely abandon the idea of seeking this ‘Vader’ out to make sure.”

“I cannot send you with good conscience, Padmé, and I know Kenobi will agree with me,” moving to stand, Bail slowly made his way closer to her to let a hand gently rest on her shoulder. “On top of that, I know that at least Leia would try to sneak her way onto the transport one way or another.”

Padmé softly laughed, nodding as she softened,” she would. She’s already so devious at only five. Then who would we send? If Obi-Wan is sent, it surely will result in a bloodbath between them, given how he was in Kuat.”

“Perhaps Ahsoka will benefit from this if she is willing,” he softly suggests, pulling back to let his gaze wander the various people milling below on the streets. “I do not recall her mentioning running into him - past or present.”

“I’ll ask her. Excuse me, Senator,” Padmé gave a soft bow of her head before she exited the meeting room to make her way through the halls to locate the twins and Ahsoka.

“That’s not fair, Leia, give it back!” Luke reached for the Loth cat toy, but Leia moved just out of reach with a smug grin as Ahsoka broke her concentration from the holonet.

“Leia, give it back to him. You two have plenty of toys to play with.”

“I want to play with this one. Luke has had it all day!” She groaned but still listened as she handed it over begrudgingly while Ahsoka softly laughed,” he’s only had it for ten minutes.”

“When will Mom be out of the boring adult stuff?” Leia approached the former Jedi, dramatically leaning over her legs as Ahsoka sipped on her caf.

“It shouldn’t be too long,” she said as she placed the mug down,” I know she wanted to talk to Bail about a few things, but it should be any minute. Y’know, when I was getting impatient with waiting for your dad to return from duties, I would always say out loud that he wouldn’t show up, and then he would.”

Leia looked up at her with widening eyes, looking back to the door,” She’s not going to come.”

It was only a few heartbeats until Padmé opened the door to the playroom, and Leia looked up at Ahsoka as if she had entirely predicted it before making her way to Ahsoka. “Mom, Luke isn’t sharing the cat plush!”

Luke’s head lifted as he softly said,” I’ve only had it for this long!” He lifted his hands to show the passage of time, and Padmé hummed,” My, that isn’t a long time at all. How about a few more minutes, then you can have it, Leia?”

Padmé picked her up, and Leia sighed,” But I want it now.”

“I know you do, but right now, he has it. It isn’t nice to take it from him, even if you want it. Uncle Obi will watch the two of you briefly while I talk with Ahsoka, okay?” She kissed Leia’s round cheek, making her giggle madly while holding onto her neck.

"Okay, Mom."

“Good, then we can play together before we have dinner.” Gently putting Leia down, Padmé motioned Ahsoka to follow her after Obi-Wan entered, grinning at the twins as they both ran to immediately cling to his legs. Pausing near Obi-Wan, her voice was low,” I also need to talk to you afterward.”

He looked at her, giving a soft nod as he softly brushed his fingers through Luke’s hair, gently guiding the twins away to begin a better dispute over the Loth cat plush.

Ahsoka entered the hall, patiently waiting as Padmé shut the door again, gently leading her to her personal room. “I need to ask you something important, Ahsoka, and I wouldn’t ask unless I believed it was important.”

“I know you wouldn’t, Padmé,” she made her way into the beautiful white and gold bedroom, moving to sit on the white ottoman bench at the end of the large bed. “I can already sense it’s causing you some distress.”

After shutting the door behind herself, Padmé’s long, baby blue dress moved gracefully above the marble floors as she soon stood before Ahsoka. “I believe that I may know who Vader is.”

Ahsoka’s features fell as she blinked, voice soft,” Who?”

“I believe that it could be Anakin. When Obi-Wan and I were in Kuat,” she looked away, hands folding in front of herself to keep them from shaking,” he had mentioned how Anakin became an apprentice of Palpatine. Shortly after, Anakin was caught in a plume of fire from one of the factories, but I believe that he survived those injuries. I had felt prods through the Force, and this new signature he has, I sometimes can find it. Though, it is faint.” She turned to face Ahsoka more, eyes watery,” I would ask Obi-Wan, but it would be too dangerous. I need you to try and locate this ‘Vader’ and observe and tell me if it’s him.”

Blue eyes widened as Ahsoka spoke softly,” You can sense him?”

“Very faintly … I know that you and Obi-Wan would understand. I’m not highly skilled with the Force, but I know that is one of the abilities - something I developed better with being pregnant with the twins.” Moving forward, she sat down to gently grab one of Ahsoka’s rough hands, brows furrowed as she pleaded. “Please, Ahsoka, I need to find my husband. I need my family back together. Even if you just confirm he’s alive, we can begin planning to bring him back.”

“Padmé, if he is Vader, he will not leave willingly. Certainly not just with me. If he’s pledged himself to the Emperor, bringing him home will most likely be impossible.”

“I know, which is why we need to plan and see why he’s been disconnected from me. First, I just need confirmation my husband is alive. That is all I ask of you.”

Looking down, Ahsoka slowly nodded,” I will bring Rex with me. Once we have confirmation, we’ll come back, but we will not engage with him. Not until we know at least he’s alive.” A soft cry of surprise escaped when Padmé clung onto her, hiding her face into Ahsoka’s shoulder,” Thank you, Ahsoka. You can take your time to prepare.”

“Oh, if we believe Vader is Anakin, I’m not wasting time, Padmé. I’ll leave by dusk. The night should give us better cover from Imps, but I don’t know about the infected.”

Pulling back, Padmé nodded,” Whenever you feel is best. After dinner, we can let Obi-Wan know, and Sabé will be able to help me with the twins. If we need to go into better hiding, I’ll communicate the best I can.”

“Of course … but I do not want to believe this is what he’s become.”

“Palpatine manipulated us all,” Padmé said softly,” and with Anakin joining the Order at only nine, that will be harder for him to see.”

“Which will make it harder for him to leave.”

“Let’s focus on confirming if it is him.”

Vader walked through the fortress's winding obsidian and onyx halls in the final stages. It had taken five long years to build, but now he could harness the dark side's power to bring Padmé back. Then, he would have her beside him, and they would be unstoppable and inseparable. Unaware of her being alive or the twin's survival, he opened the door to his chambers, looking around the dark space as lights flickered on. The obsidian walls were shiny and polished as they reflected light easily from the bacta tank two meters in front of him, and to the left, there was a doorway to a highly pressurized meditation chamber to provide better oxygen.

While he didn't need to entirely depend on the mask, he preferred it to keep the anonymity. It would have been better if the Empire believed that Anakin Skywalker was dead, and it would have ensured that he was getting the recommended oxygen. Even if he sometimes did wish that perhaps it would be his final day on the planet. Moving closer to the tank, he could hear the construction workers leaving for the day, but he could feel his belly begin to ache. How long had it been? Perhaps too long, though these days, it seemed like he was in a constant haze, unable to remember the simplest things - especially in various battles across the regions. The medical droids confirmed his health, though his cybernetics could have improved. Yet, that was always put off in favor of some new experimentation by Palpatine.

Perhaps he often wished for death far more than he wanted to admit.

Moving to the tank, he quietly checked the solution's calibration on the side panel before he felt a familiar prod. Something he had believed had stopped years ago, and his head lifted up at the familiar scent of Padmé's perfume. Now, his mind was playing cruel tricks.

Padmé was alone, taking a moment to bathe while Ahsoka and Obi-Wan played with the kids. She settled into the porcelain tub, wondering, wishing perhaps she was right. Yet, she couldn’t help herself, and it was as if a soft voice coaxed her to reach out to him. Closing her eyes, she let her body relax in the warm water while her skin soaked up the oils, grateful she could still enjoy this luxury. There was still guilt that wracked her heart, and she often asked herself how she could enjoy this luxury while so many starved, were displaced, or were slaughtered by order of the Empire?

Pushing that to the back of her mind, she focused on the nudge, the little whisper through the miles apart that she was from Anakin. Reaching out in the force, her familiar signature found his new one, colder, worn, and filled with so much hatred. Yet, at her nudge, it softened, molding into a weakened yet familiar warmth he had.

Brow muscles furrowed once he felt her more decisive nudges, and he climbed into the bacta tank after removing his mask and changing into more suitable clothing for a soak. After disappearing beneath the surface of the murky solution, he let his eyes shut, floating softly in the harness that dug into his underarms and thighs. The nudge seemed to grow, still faint. This was a cruel trick. Nothing more than his mind trying to play little games with his heart to make him remember. As the minutes ticked by, it was only twenty minutes until the nudge grew into a brighter warmth, enveloping him fully.

Padmé slowly relaxed while a warmth enveloped her in return, voice soft,” Ani. Please, come home.” She grasped the side of the tub more, tears welling up before the warmth suddenly vanished, and the loss only caused her to sit up. Hunching over, she couldn’t help the sob that escaped, leaning forward,” Anakin, please.”

Ani. Please, come home. His breath caught beneath the mask, and he felt like the coldest ice from Hoth had settled in his veins. Padmé. She’s alive. The rage began to boil, melting the ice into the hottest flames as cracks began to form in the tank’s glass. His eyes opened, and by using the Force, he engaged the tank system to remove him despite his skin aching and crying out in protest while the scars snagged. Reattaching his cybernetics, he hastily got dried and redressed before storming his way through the halls.

Getting to his throne room, he ordered the droid that emerged to connect him to the Emperor as he made his way to the throne. Settling, he didn’t suppress his anger, even when the familiar blue figure came in front of him, surprised by the late call.

“You’re troubled, my friend. I believe anyone in Coruscant can feel your anger now.”

“I have sensed my wife through the Force,” Vader growled out, features fully on display as he had neglected his eyes, which stayed focused on the Emperor. “I know that she is alive.”

Sidious was quiet momentarily, watching Vader before his voice came out lowly,” Vader, we know you have been blinded by your feelings before.”

“My wife is alive and has reached out to me.” Fingers tightly grasp the throne’s arms, starting to crack at the perfectly polished stone.

“I do not recall the Senator being force-sensitive,” he hummed lowly while mulling over how he could turn this around. “My friend, I fear the last surgery had caused more damage than expected. Perhaps you are now sensing ghosts in the Force that linger behind. Try to reach out to her now.”

Closing his eyes, Sidious could see the muscles in his jaw and cheek tightening while trying to reach out to her, searching for anything. While Vader did, Sidious only hid her markers once again and was pleased by the little hope draining from Vader’s features as his yellow eyes opened again.

“Have you found her?”

“No ... There is nothing.”

The defeat in his voice satisfied his Master as Sidious only hummed in thought,” I have extensively looked into her disappearance and rediscovery, Vader. She was turned and eventually killed. The troopers reported her death, but like all other infected bodies, we had to do a mass cremation. Senator Amidala is dead.”

It felt like Anakin’s heart was being ripped out again, yet he couldn’t quickly shake it off. Then again, he could never quickly back away when he was determined with something. She was alive.

He would do anything to prove it, even if he just had to wait.

Anakin would wait fifty thousand years even if it meant learning that his wife and child were alive. He would bide his time, make his plans, and eventually, Maker willing, he would be beside them again.

#.pdf #fanfic #the flowers never bloom series #anidala fanfic #star wars fanfiction #anakin skywalker fanfiction #padme amidala fanfiction #padmé amidala fanfiction #anidala

3 notes · View notes