Summer always makes him want to cut his hair.

Do you find that with quilge & nnoi, quilge has a lesser need for the hunt, or does their relationship only heighten the need for the thrill?

character relations asks : tentatively accepting .

*smacks hands together* okay . very good question . and thank you for the quilnoi theme , i do so love talking about them . :^) the short answer is , yes ... somewhat , anyway . there is now a bit of a lesser need for the hunt , now that he has nnoitra as a husband . not that that really ... lessens his desire to hunt outright , nnoitra just willingly agrees to be hunted down by quilge . they're immortal . they're insane . they're in love . they're kinky . what do you think they're going to do ? but now , for the long answer .

that's honestly a bit of a wild concept to think about . because ------ to start , quilge viewed nnoitra , literally , as a wild beast sent by fate to him to be captured . i'm fucking serious . not that there was ... immediately , a sexual desire to his actions . he did think he was attractive , he is his type & he values his unique appearance and likes his confidence . quilge , an audacious man himself , admires audacity , too . but his desire for the hunt , something he speaks extremely highly about and is a treasured aspect in his life , is extremely important to him . hunting was the first skill that he was ever really taught , outside of quincy-specific things . even before torture . just about anyone can hunt , but it absolutely takes patience . it is such a valued skill in his personal arsenal that he's the executive hunting captain now . so , when he was assigned to hueco mundo to bring back strong beasts , only to come across an espada , he felt ... extremely blessed . everything else was tossed out the window . THIS was the rarest monster he would ever hunt . he considers it the finest hunt of his life . and it was an extremely violent one , at that .

quilge massacred his own men just to get them alone ------ he didn't want anyone else to touch him , this was his hunt . nnoitra mauls him so badly that it leaves a permanent scar on his upper arm . he starts beating quilge over and over . and quilge responds by forcing him off , beating him back , dragging him off by his hair . and then they have another murder-chase . quilge beats him up some more , but he never really aims to kill him . he doesn't WANT to kill nnoitra , only draw out their fight , and strike him in enough places to strategically weaken him . he later dragged nnoi back to the encampment ( nnoi might have immense raw power , but he's really lacking a lot of the stamina , practice & discipline quilge has ) , and he struggled & screamed the whole way . he doesn't even use the jail yet because he didn't want to . he only uses the jail a little later on him , and nnoitra still struggles inside of it . but he can't escape it . no one's ever really ... captured him . and all that strength he possesses is getting him nowhere . it doesn't matter how loud he screams , or how hard he swings his sword . he isn't getting out .

neither of them ever experienced something like that before , really . quilge , with a monster of immense power and ferality . and nnoitra , with a man who can finally cage him , and put a stop to what he's doing . they're pretty much evenly matched , but their fortes are in different areas . they could easily have fought for much longer . and it's in that rather raw period of time , that quilge realizes he was right . he was right all along , actually . that was the best hunt he'd ever had . he had found a magnificent beast : one that didn't hold back , one that was actually , truthfully , monstrous . he thinks about his own orders that were given to him by the higher-ups . that he should bring back any of the strong-willed arrancar , the powerful and the brave ( so much so that it borders on stupidity ) , to silbern . and have them fight alongside the wandenreich . he doesn't ignore his orders . it just so happens that he'd found and captured one of the most powerful beings in all of hueco mundo , and he isn't going to let him go . he wants to hunt him again , and again , and again , with that same intensity . he claims that nnoitra makes him sick , but he's actually very fascinated by him . likes him inside of that cage more than he'd like to admit . the idea of keeping him . yes , his feelings venture into petplay territory . of course they do . and nnoitra is just so monstrous that it ... clicks in his brain , too .

since their relationship became more legitimate & established , they engage in consensual , organized hunts against each other . it's absolutely a part of the primalplay fetish . but also , they're insanely strong immortals , so it gets way more bloodied & intense . and sometimes , it even lasts for days on end . they've realized they can indulge in those desires , and engage in those desires that only they can , because most other people WOULD PROBABLY DIE or NOT BE INTO IT . it is very intimate to them , but probably VERY fucked up to other people . lmao . nnoitra said that there's "no one else" for him , and vice versa , and i believe that .

at the same time , however , they're both evil murderous men who love to kill other people . they even kill as a pair . and their love doesn't lessen that in the slightest . killing and violence are both deeply engrained into their being . in some ways , being together heightened some of their murderous desires . some . quilge kills to keep nnoitra fed on a diet of cannibalism , sometimes . nnoitra still kills when he's upset , or depressed , but will encourage him to find people to torture so he can watch ( he loves it when his husband is mean ) . there's times when they both admit that they just HAVE to kill , maim , torture and consume . but they also satiate each other in ways that aren't murder . they both proclaim they love each other , too . and yet , they could kill someone the next moment . kiss kiss . heart emojis everywhere . so their love never dulled or softened their hearts nor their other desires . nnoitra is a born monster . quilge is a man who became a monster . and if anything , they bring that out more than any other . it's an important part to their relationship .

as one could guess , being attacked by quilnoi in battle IS A FUCKING NIGHTMARE . you'd think that just one of them on their own is enough , well . quilge has taught nnoitra numerous commands ------ he can communicate with him through whistles , for example . he's teaching him how to summon his own reishi bow . he's also teaching him to be more patient and strategic at swordplay . they're also both long range and close range fighters ( nnoi's terasa has a chain that can be swung around ) . while not exactly in perfect , pristine sync when in combat together , they're definitely a very deadly pair if anyone really has the misfortune to come across them . which , however , is quite likely given the fact that nnoi refuses to leave quilge's side .

nnoi is greatly attached and dependant on quilge for ... a number of reasons . and quilge , in some manners , feels the same way . although he doesn't have the same disposition as nnoitra personally , he does ... need him and is also equally as attached . they're also both intensely possessive over the other . nnoi , more vocally and outwardly so . if anyone so much as threatens , insults , even so little as looking at quilge , nnoitra is thinking about killing them . lmao . if you hurt quilge , nnoitra will have to be held back . taking him away from him would literally make nnoi go insane . nnoi ... at this time in their relationship , only has quilge . no fraccion , no other espada , no leader . so he's just hanging onto this weirdo sternritter man like his life depends on it .

nothing and no one will separate them . not even the fucking auswählin .

so , in the end , the answer is that , yes , some of quilge's more sadistic desires have been satiasted . FUCKING HOWEVER , not even his love will keep him from being awful , and his own consort encourages that behavior . wild , huh ?

It has been a while since I have last written a review on a book (sadly so) and in addition to that, this is the first review to go up on my book blog on Tumblr. I want to preface my review with a notice that English is not my first language, hence mistakes may occur in the following review.

SPOILERS AHEAD

***

After having The Illuminae Files Book 1 „Illuminae“ by Amie Kaufman and Jay Kristoff on my radar ever since it was released in 2015, I finally came around to reading it this year, 2021. I was mildly intrigued by the concept of this book since it is not written in typical prose much as you are probably used to reading. Instead, the story unfolds itself through chat records, audio and video transcripts, E-mails, documents of other sorts and visuals. It is presented as a collection of files (hence the title of the series) and right of the bat we get to know that everything we are going to be exposed to has happened roughly a year in the past.

I will first and foremost praise the book for its intentions. The concept is quite unique and you won‘t find many books with a similar style. Kudos for creativity. Though: Personally, the combination of a sci-fi story and a non-consistent way of storytelling resulted in a huge lack of enjoyment. It felt info-dump-y at times; and although I rarely have many problems with being thrown into cold water and a pool of information my brain cannot comprehend instantly at the start of a book, Illuminae genuinely made me feel dumb all throughout the entire novel. I can somewhat excuse this by saying that I usually never read sci-fi - when I do, it happens very sparsely - yet it is a matter of fact that I enjoyed this book less and less the more I read it.

Next, I want to touch upon the writing style. While I liked the E-mails and especially the chat excerpts between Kady and Ezra (I thought they were most accurately written from a teen‘s perspective), I was unbelievably close to ripping my hair out and sending the book flying across my room (I could not practice the latter urge. I borrowed my copy from the library) whenever there were the security camera transcripts, as well as AIDAN‘s data pages. I have no idea what happened there but in comparison to the files Kady retrieved or the E-mails - both of which were written quite realistically in my opinion - those felt way over the top and childishly exaggerated.

The subjectiveness of the video transcripts was horrible: It distanced me so much from the story itself because they felt utterly comical. The attempts (failed miserably) at humor made me roll my eyes and sigh more than I could keep track of. It seems as if the book wants to be more than it is. My rating would have improved by a lot if the seriousness of the story was kept consistent and believable.

AIDAN…was a whole mess. The pages dedicated to his POV contributed to the pain this book inflicted on me…a lot. Obviously, this takes place sometime in the future – 2075? 2175? Perhaps even 3375? – so I am aware that there possibly could be a time in which AIs are able to simulate human emotions. I am aware that it is not entirely impossible to program an AI to have a fraction of self-awareness. Yet, it did not click with me that AIDAN is able to feel the desire to hold someone (Kady) in his arms. He felt too human (which was the point, probably), which in itself is not a problem, but then he constantly emphasizes how he is only a code and that he does not have a human’s physique. I GET it. Thank you AIDAN for reminding me a zillion times that you are – in fact – an AI.

In addition to this, I have yet another problem with AIDAN which has bothered me oh so much. Why is he speaking (thinking? BEING??) so poetically? I could easily find ten metaphors and three similes within two pages of AIDAN-text. It already bothers me plenty when real human of flesh and blood speak in an unrealistically flowery style – although I love pretentious writing. But then, in AIDAN’s case, you have a AI speaking more pretentiously than I have ever read before. It was a-nnoy-ing. Jeez.

More critique to come. I am convinced that I am part of the minority who does not think Illuminae deserves the hype it gets. I have to be; the Goodreads rating is 4.25. I am going to try to keep the following critique short.

A) Kady. She. Is. Annoying. I cannot pinpoint exactly as to Why I find her so unbearable. She just…is. Presumably because of the whole breaking-up-with-Ezra situation as well as her thinking a lot of herself. There are moments in which I like her. But in hindsight, she is stuck in my brain as The Unlikable Girl.

B) Kady and Ezra should have went the lovers to friends route. Them rebuilding their romantic relationship did in no way further the plot. It did not even feel natural that they made up via text and E-Mail. Clearly, they had not much of a choice, considering they were thousands of kilometres apart on two different spaceships. Still, I believe Kaufman and Kristoff could have found a better way to put the relationship of those two in rice.

C) Ezra’s death. He should simply have stayed dead. Would have made the whole thing much more dramatic and impactful. I see no reason as to why Ezra should have been spared from death. Especially because the vibe of this story was dark enough to justify it. I loved the plot twist of AIDAN revealing that he had fooled Kady. And all the epic-ness ceased away when it was resolved in the end that Ezra actually has not died. Totally lackluster.

Finally, my rating for Illuminae: One point five out of five stars. My biggest disappointment of the year. I was so excited to eventually read this book. I was ultimately let down by it and am not going to continue this series.

Name: Nnoitra Gilga.

Nickname: Nnoi, babe .

Gender: Male.

Romantic orientation: Grey-romantic.

Preferred pet names: He’s not a fan, but he accepts that Grimmjow likes to call him ‘ babe ‘. The only thing he likes about that pet-name is that at least he knows Grimmjow isn’t mad at him or anything like that.

Relationship status: In a relationship with Grimmjow since August 2017.

Favourite canon/fandom ship: Nnoitra / Grimmjow, but only thanks to Lexie’s Grimmjow. This ship actually used to be on my NOTP list, until Nnoitra met Lexie’s Grimmjow who he clicked so well with. I’ve never really had any ships for Nnoitra.

Favourite crossover ship: Like I said, I’ve never really had any ships for Nnoitra, though I’ve had good ships with Nnoitra and two OCs.

Opinion on true love: Nnoitra believes that true love is something that can only happen if both parties have seen each other’s worst sides. If someone will love you after seeing your monster side? Then it’s real.

Opinion on love at first sight: Nnoitra doesn’t believe in this, having never felt love at first sight ( though he has felt physical attraction ). Nnoitra is the sort of person who needs to establish a close relationship with someone before love can form.

How ‘romantic’ are they?: He’s hardly romantic at all. Nnoitra sees most romantic gestures as too ‘ girly ‘ or deems showing feelings as a weakness. His love-language is not romantic.

Ideal physical traits: He doesn’t really have a ‘ type ‘ when it comes to the physical. For women, he prefers them to have big breasts, and overall that ‘sexy woman’-body type. He likes his women to have long hair and full lips. He prefers for them not to wear too much make-up. When it comes to guys - he prefers them to be as ‘ manly ‘ as possible. A strong body, a strong jawline, rough skin, short hair. He’s also a big fan of tattoos.

Ideal personality traits: Someone who is funny, and has strong believes. Nnoitra likes brave people. He also needs people to be patient with him, and understanding. He needs to be with someone who can handle his own personality.

Unattractive physical traits: Skinny people (of either gender), bony frames, small eyes, big teeth, small ears, small feet. He also doesn’t like it when people are too far apart from him in weight. The heavier the less attracted he is (simply because he is jealous). 

Unattractive personality traits: Weaklings, crybabies, know-it-alls. Nnoitra wouldn’t like being with someone who had to ‘test’ him all the time.

Ideal date: His ideal date would definitely be a walk in the woods. Nnoitra actually loves being out in nature (even though he rarely gets to go). Going for a long walk until darkness falls, and then have outdoor-sex under a moonlit sky.

Do they have a type?:  No. Nnoitra can feel attracted to different type of people. The most important thing is that they ‘accept’ him, and are willing to work with - or deal with - his personality. 

Average relationship length: Nnoitra has only been in two serious relationships in his life. The first one lasted 2 years, and the one he is in now is on its 3rd year.

Preferred non-sexual intimacy: Hair play. Either giving or receiving. Nnoitra tends to touch Grimmjow’s hair a lot. He also likes cupping his face or touching his neck.

Commitment level: 100%. Nnoitra is incredibly possessive and would never want to share. It’s not easy for him to fall in love, but once his feelings are formed, they are deep. He gets attached to his partner on an almost unhealthy level, and would never look elsewhere. 

Opinion of public affection: He would love to do it - but he won’t. He’s too paranoid that being in a relationship with him will make Grimmjow a target for hate-crime. Thus he hardly ever does anything affectionate in public. He’ll accept holding hands if the street is empty. He’ll also do little things, like walk closest to the road to keep Grimmjow safe, stand extra close to him in lines and have their shoulders touch briefly when they walk side-by-side. He wants to be close to him. He just can’t. 

 Past relationships?: He dated Kyota (written by Nicola) for 2 years, and after that he’s been dating Grimmjow.

Tagging: whoever wants to do it!

tagged by:  @waveringiridescence​ ( thank you eve! )

NAME:  Nnoitra Gilga.

NICKNAME: Nnoi / The Mantis ( stagename ).

GENDER: Male.

ORIENTATION: Bisexual & Greyromantic. 

PREFERRED PET NAMES: Really dislikes petnames, unless it’s Grimmjow calling him babe.

RELATIONSHIP STATUS: Dating Grimmjow - @grimmjxw . 

OPINION ON TRUE LOVE: Strong believer.

OPINION ON LOVE AT FIRSTSIGHT: #Doubt.

HOW ‘ROMANTIC’ ARE THEY: Not romantic at all, especially not in the traditional sense.

IDEAL PHYSICAL TRAITS: muscles, strong arms, abs, hair long enough for him to pull at, sharp teeth, a strong jawline, dimples, wide hips, loud voice. ( males ) for females -  wide hips, big boobs, short stature, soft facial features, long hair.

IDEAL PERSONALITY TRAITS: Respectful ( towards him ), patient ( with him ), affectionate, humorous, confident, loyal, playful, understanding.

UNATTRACTIVE PHYSICAL TRAITS: Someone being taller than him,  beards ( he is just jealous because he can’t grow one ), green hair, nicotine stained fingers, yellow teeth, skinny body, ribs showing, small ears, thin lips.

UNATTRACTIVE PERSONALITY TRAITS:  opeful, optimistic, wishful, unrealistic, timid, shy, pretentious, petty, neglectful, obnoxious, insecure, fickle, moody, egocentric, disloyal, dishonest, artificial, cowardly

IDEAL DATE: Nnoitra isn’t the type to go on dates, but spending a night in nature would probably be the best thing for him.

DO THEY HAVE A TYPE: No.

AVERAGE RELATIONSHIP LENGTH: Nnoitra’s first relationship lasted for two years, his current one has been going on for one year.

PREFERRED NON-SEXUAL INTIMACY: Hairplay, either receiving or giving ( preferably receiving ).

COMMITMENT  LEVEL: One hundred percent committed. 

OPINION OF PUBLIC AFFECTION: Mixed feelings.

PAST RELATIONSHIPS: Kyota - @heavilyxtattooed . 

tagged by: @trafalgar-bleedingheart-law ( thank you for the tag! )

tagging: anyone who wants to do it!