Billy: Yeah, well, I hate you. Steve: No you don’t. Billy, bitterly: No, I don’t.

Steve: Do you ever just see something that changes your life and you're just "huh". Billy: I saw you. Steve: Honestly that's so gay and sweet and it really makes this awkward because I was gonna show you a photo of a drawing of Harrison Ford as a turkey.

Steve: I'm going to talk to Dustin. He shoved me the other day. Billy: So, are you strangling him before or after this "talk"? Steve: I'm going to let him vent, get it all out. Billy: If it were me, I'd kick him to death. But we all have our own way of handling things.

Eddie: You probably had a maid growing up. You seem like the type. Steve: No? We had a housekeeper. Robin: Do you hear yourself sometimes? Like, when you talk?

Billy [waking up after being sedated]: Where am I? Billy [seeing Steve nearby]: Is this heaven? Dustin: He's awake! Billy: Oh, God. It's hell.

Max: Hey, can I get some dating advice? Billy: Just because I’m with Steve doesn’t mean I know how I did it.

Dustin: I drink to forget, but I always remember. Steve: You’re drinking orange juice.

Billy: If there's going to be a big dramatic scene, wait until I get back. Eddie: Of course. I can't flip this table by myself.

Billy: You owe it to me as my sister to tell me what you really think! Max: Okay. You're a narcissist, you're a sociopath, you're probably a psychopath... [Twenty minutes later] Max: ...you're paranoid, sexist, and you make fun of the elderly. Billy: Those are just quirks!

Steve: Are you crazy?! Billy: Legally, no. There’s not a word for my condition.

Billy: The only Wall of Fame I've been on was my favourite bar, Tom Bergin's, for inventing something called the Tequila Bong. Steve: What is that? Billy: I do not remember.

Billy: Believe me, you won’t like me when I’m angry. Robin: I don't like you right now.

Steve: I can't have sex without love. Billy: Aw, that's so sad.

Billy: Hey. Steve: Billy: I just insulted you. Now you're supposed to insult me back; there's a rhythm to this thing man.

Billy: Jealousy or hatred? Billy: It's so hard to choose; it's like having to choose between one child or the other– Billy: Hatred. [Turns back to look at Max] Listen here, you little shit!

Billy: I'm guessing you're one of those who's got a big urge to reach out to people? Steve: Yup! Billy: Fight that.

Eddie: And once again, Eddie and Billy save the day! Steve: You didn't do anything. It was all Billy. Eddie: We're a package deal. Everyone knows that.