{6:48 pm}: Lee Felix

As you sit on the secluded park bench, you’re aware of the cool metal underneath the fabric of your jeans. The golden beams of the sun slowly sink down behind the trees, the last signs of the sun before you’re consumed by the biting cold of the night. Your body feels heavy as gravity is pulling you down heart first; the ground invites you to lay down and just let time pass. That’s how you’ve been living your life lately anyway. Letting time pass. You haven’t felt present in your body for months as you go through the motions of your day; the only thing you’re aware of is what’s missing from your life that manifests as the hole in your chest. The one he left behind. You’ve come to terms that it wasn’t his fault that he left you, and you’ve forgiven him for the promises that he’ll never be able to keep. You grip the edges of the old hard bench and close your eyes as the breeze brushes against your cheek like the ghost of his gentle touch across your skin. He always made you feel delicate but never weak. You still feel him with you everywhere you go. The mesmerizing colors of sunsets that fill you with awe, the ethereal stars that bring a sense of serenity, and the beauty of flowers that flourish with joy and warmth. When you left the house this morning, you needed to go where you felt him the most. The bench where you shared your first kiss. The air was charged with memories as you felt your surroundings. You could picture him sitting beside you, his warm hand engulfing yours with no intention of letting you go. You could never forget the way his eyes sparkled and crinkled at the corners when he smiled. You can still hear his rich laugh echoing in your ears, fading with each passing day. You silently promise him that you won’t forget. The sun is gone now, and night has fallen upon you like a soft blanket. The insects are playing a soft symphony as you continue to reminisce. It was five years ago today that he asked you to be his girlfriend. You had gone on a walk through the park, and you could vividly picture his nerves, smiling to yourself your enjoyment of your effect on him. He had been working up the courage to kiss you the whole time, and he finally seized the opportunity underneath the shade of a grand tree flowering with white petals. He softly took your face in his hands and gazed into your eyes. You barely heard him ask the question over your pounding heart. You knew you had said yes though because then he was leaning in, and your life had changed forever. It was as if you had never kissed anyone; you had never felt such emotions before. Shivers ran through you, but your body thrummed with warmth. You could feel his smile against your lips, and when you pulled away, the flower petals were falling down around you. You almost believed that he was magical as he stood radiant in front of you, and his rich laugh elicited your own as he picked a petal from your hair. You slowly open your eyes and take a shaky breath as you wipe the hot tears that have trailed down your face. You look down at your lap where a single white petal has landed in your lap. Your sun is gone, but he will always be with you.

I may or may not have impulsively gotten that tattoo last night 😅 my friend literally looked up tattoo shop last night and invited me. I got the butterflies!! They’re really cute, but I’m like ahhh I have a tattoo??? It really didn’t hurt that bad. Just a little uncomfy

It's tattoo anon! I got some orchids tattooed! If you're thinking of getting one, I'd recommend something small. You can look up pain charts online - I'd recommend putting it on a thigh for a first tattoo. Oh, and you can also take pain killers before the appointment if you're worried about it - as long as they don't thin the blood.

Ooo I bet it turned out really good!! I’m definitely thinking about getting something small for my first one. I want some butterflies on my forearm which I believe is a yellowish area sooo we’ll see how it goes lol tysm for the advice!! <333

smiley channie 😆 → happy birthday @minchanz 🤍

#EternityWithSeungmin 💙 — happy Seungmin day!

hbd !!

Thanks love!! 💖

(000915) happy birthday felix 🎂

It is officially my birthday as well!! 🥳

(000914) happy birthday han 🎂

Hey guys!! I’m sorry about just disappearing for a little bit, but I’ve had a lot of life changes come up. All good things!! I’ve been working on an ot8 fic, and I was hoping to get it posted before everything… but hopefully now I can get that done soon 💕💕

hello!!

I wanted to make a request... I'm currently re-watching Kingdom rn and I was wondering if you could write about comforting I.N after his 'I'll Be Your Man' stage if possible??

I love your work, you don't have to do this 🤍🤍

Ahh, i remember how disappointed Innie was after that :( I hated seeing him so hard on himself. I thought that the voice crack added more emotion to the performance.

I’ll add this to my writing list and see what I can come up with!!

OMG JISUNG SANG A ROCK SONG AND THEN PLAYED THE ELECTRIC GUITAR ?!?!!?!! I THINK I JUST FELL EVEN MORE IN LOVE 💓💞💝💘💕💓💘💟💞💗💞💘💖💞🩷💝🩷💝

(990811) happy birthday changbin 🎂

Waiting For You

Genre: hurt/comfort, angst w/ fluff, established relationship 

Pairing: Idol!Bang Chan x Fem!Reader 

Word Count: 1.6k

Warning: heavy feelings, tears, and a kiss 

Summary: Chan is feeling overwhelmed, and you’re there to comfort him 

A/N: based on this request!! Also I noticed the hearts are pages from the cruel prince 🥰

You had always admired Chan’s hardwork and dedication to his music. You also admired how he was the kindest person you’ve ever met, always taking care of everyone around him. Like with his members, he was always trying to unload their burdens; even though he already has his fair share. When he was diligently working on all his projects, it was common for him to end up sleeping at the dorms that were closer to the studio or even at the studio itself. He had a bad habit of prioritizing his work over himself, so you always did your best to check in on him and take care of him. 

It was harder to do this when their schedules would become busier during promotions. They had crazy schedules where they were constantly creating, practicing, and performing with very little breaks in between. You could tell he was tired. On the nights that he did come home at ungodly hours, he was immediately out cold when his head hit the pillow, and he was already gone when you’d wake up in the morning. You really tried to believe Chan when he told you that everything was okay. You didn’t want to push him, but your stomach would churn with concern when you could see the obvious toll everything was taking on him. 

When you heard that he was getting the weekend off, you were so happy and relieved for him to finally have this well-deserved break. You were sure he needed to use these days to get much needed rest, and you wanted to help him destress in any way that you could. Once Friday night finally came, you had everything ready to give Chan a pampering. The hours were passing by, and you became more and more worried with each hour that you didn’t hear from him until eventually you received a very brief text that said he was sleeping at the dorms.

You decided that instead of being disappointed that he wasn’t coming home, you’d just go to him at the dorms. Changbin had been the one to let you in, being the only other one there since the others had gone home for the weekend and planning to leave himself first thing in the morning. It was almost midnight now, and once Changbin retreated back to his room, everything was still and quiet in the dorm as you made your way to your boyfriend’s room. “Hey Channie, it’s me…” you said, softly knocking on the door. 

The silence stretched on for a moment, and you thought to yourself that he might just already be asleep. You quietly turned the knob and slipped inside, plunging the room in darkness once again as you gently shut the door behind you. Your eyes took a second to adjust to the lack of light, but you could make out Chan’s figure in the bed. He was still very much awake with his hands under his head and staring up at the ceiling. “Baby?” You called out to him softly. 

He looked over at you just then as if he hadn’t even noticed you until now. He silently slid over to make room for you and pulled the covers back for you to join him. You wordlessly slotted your body next to his, your head resting on his bare chest and an arm hooked around his waist. The muted atmosphere settled around you both like a smothering blanket, and you focused on the steady rhythm of his heartbeat under you. 

“What are you thinking about?” you asked him softly after a while, and you traced soothing shapes into his skin at his side. 

“So much…” he answered, his voice barely a whisper, and you could hear the exhaustion creeping in his tone. 

Your brow furrowed in worry at his words, and the corners of your mouth turned down in a frown. “Want to talk about it?” 

“No…” 

“Chan…” your own voice sounded sad as you pleaded for him to let you in. You wanted to help him, but you knew he always had trouble asking for it. 

He let out a long exhale of breath, and his arms that were wrapped around you squeezed you slightly. You craned your neck to look up at him, and you could see his Adam's apple bob as he swallowed thickly. “I’m under so much pressure all the time…” you listened to him intently as his words came out strained and almost broken. “I just feel overwhelmed, but I can’t feel that way. Everyone is counting on me, and I can’t afford to be like this…” 

“Baby…” you started, but he cut you off. 

“Now, I’ve made you worried about me,” he laughed humorlessly. He removed one of his hands that was against your shoulder, and your body instantly missed the warmth of his touch. “You don’t have to do that… I can work through this alone,” He mumbled with his eyes still squeezed shut. 

You lifted up from his chest to lean over him, and your own heart hurt seeing how much Chan was fighting in his own head. “I know that’s what you’re used to, but you don’t have to do it alone anymore…” You gently coaxed the hand away from his eyes to see his skin glistening under where his eyelashes rested. The silent tears had started to slip from his eyes and over his flushed cheeks. 

He sucked in a harsh breath and shook his head stubbornly at your words. “I can’t- I don’t want to have to unload these things on you…” he struggled to say. 

“Baby, it’s not a burden,” you quickly reassured him, holding his face with both of your hands as you used your thumbs to wipe away his tears. “You’re not a burden… never.” You said softly, leaning in to kiss his blotchy cheeks and feeling him relax a little under your touch. 

Once you pulled away, his eyes slowly fluttered open to look up at you vulnerably. They were a little glassy from the tears that still pooled there. “I’m supposed to be strong all the time, and I don’t know if I can…” he admitted quietly. 

“But you don’t have to be strong all the time. It’s okay to let yourself feel these things,” you brushed the hair back from his forehead, and you could see the tension slowly melting from his shoulders. “You’re my safe place, Channie. Let me be that for you.” 

“You are. You already are, baby. I promise,” he said quickly. He gazed sincerely into your eyes, hoping that you knew just how much you meant to him. His fingers buried themselves in your hair as his hand rested on the back of your head. 

“Please, let me in… let me help you…” you pleaded with your voice barely a whisper. 

All Chan had said in return was a small, “okay,” but you knew that it had taken a lot for him to finally give in. His face was etched with heavy emotions, but you could tell there had been a weight lifted from him. You offered him a warm smile as your thumb swiped over his plump bottom lip. He gently pulled you toward him, and your lips softly brushed together. 

The kiss was tender and sweet as you both communicated your trust and commitment to be there for each other. Your breaths melded together as he pressed you closer to him, and you felt as if you’d never be close enough. There was a hint of saltiness to his lips from the tears that he’d shed earlier, but they were still plush and perfect, making butterflies erupt in your stomach with every touch. When you finally pulled away, you rested your forehead against his, feeling his soft puffs of breath fan your face and the gentle rise and fall of his chest. 

You settled back on the pillows to lay down with him, and his head was tucked under your chin. The tufts of hair at the top of his head tickled you slightly, and you reached up to smooth them back down. His arms were wrapped securely around your waist as he nuzzled into your neck, and you happily wrapped your arms around his shoulders to hold him against you. You soothingly rubbed his back, and all the rigidness from before had been thoroughly dispelled. 

The room once again fell silent, but it was no longer suffocating. The darkness that bathed the room now felt like a serene bubble from the world that you and Chan had created together. You relished in the warmth he provided with your limbs tangled together until your hearts were almost beating as one. You hoped Chan felt just as safe and loved in your hold as he always made you feel. 

You only knew he hadn’t fallen asleep from the way his thumb was slowly stroking your skin from where it rested. “Chan?” You called out to him. He hummed in response, and you could feel the rumble as it vibrated in his chest. “What are you thinking about?” 

“I’m not,” he answered simply, his soothing voice bringing an absent smile to your lips. “I love this. Just existing with you…” He pressed a small kiss to your shoulder before he spoke again, “thank you.” 

You leaned your head against his. Your cheek was pressed against his hair, and the familiar scent of his shampoo brought you an instant sense of ease. “For what?” You asked, confused as to why he was thanking you. 

“For not letting me be alone,” his voice was muffled against your skin, but the meaning behind it reached you clearly. 

“I’ll always be here for you.” You were willing to be patient and wait for him to talk to you about everything that overwhelmed him, but it was enough for now knowing he would. You soothingly ran your fingers through the locks of his hair until you felt his breathing slow and his hold on you slightly loosened as his body went lax. You softly kissed the top of his head, loving that you could bring him this comfort as you let your own eyes slowly close. You knew that he was now peacefully asleep, but you still whispered, “I love you.” 

Just got finished watching guardians of the galaxy 3 since it’s on Disney+ now and… ngl it almost got me a couple of times 😭😭

STRAY KIDS HAVE THEIR OWN INSTAS OMGOMGOGMG !!!!

Happy Birthday STAY

I went on Pinterest today to find a pic for a Chan fic, and I ended up writing for a completely different Chan drabble after getting inspo from a pic on there 😅