ineyraei
When the Sun Goes Down
-- Neyraei, Ney, Rani --
-- 21 y/o, Taurus --
-- He/his/him, a Very Big Gay™ --
-- Read my Before You Follow (BYF) and ABOUT for more info --
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shoutout to trans guys
mid-transition trans guys don’t get nearly enough recognition on this site. it feels like all trans guy positivity is either geared towards pre-everything Soft Boys™ or towards ‘fully transitioned’ cis-passing men, so here’s a shoutout to all my in-betweeners.
here’s to the guys who are out but aren’t respected.
to the guys who are on T but still don’t pass.
to the guys who work out but don’t see any results.
to the guys who have binders but still don’t feel flat.
to the guys who have the right legal name but the wrong legal sex.
to the guys who still aren’t sure which bathroom to use.
to the guys who are impatient about their patchy facial hair.
to the guys who are insecure about how their top surgery scars are healing.
to the guys who feel stuck in the gray zone between ‘boy’ and ‘man’.
to all the trans guys waiting, it’s okay. you are worthy of respect.
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You are LGBT if..
You are lesbian, gay, bisexual, or transgender. That’s it. Aces aren’t LGBT.
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trans and gay boys are allowed to be masculine without being “gross boys :/” and not fitting your “soft trans gay uwu” aesthetic
cis and straight boys are allowed to be feminine without SECRETLY being trans or gay
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It’s All A Fucking Joke, Right
In the few months I’ve been modding at fuckyeahasexual and touring ace Tumblr, there’s been a very. Steady. Stream of info that detail horrifically abusive situations and overall poor mental unhealth. Two a week in the inbox if I’m lucky, usually around seven-ten.
And there’s been so many, I can officially categorize all 500+ of these kinds of asks and submissions into an extensive bulletlist of Why Asexual Exclusionary Radicalism Is Incredibly Toxic And Shitty;
Coming Out To Family, Friends, And Employers
“My parents keep telling me that I’m something else, and it’s making me doubt my sense of judgement, not just about my sexual identity, but also about everything in general.”
“My family, friends, and co-workers keep referring to me as an inanimate object in a manner that’s clearly meant to humiliate and devastate me. Nothing I say will get them to stop.”
“My parents vocally/bodily forced me to undergo medical examinations, some of them concerning my sexual organs, many of them concerning blood tests and other trauma-centric procedures.”
“My family is intervening with my private life by changing my schedule to include exercise, socialization, friend influences, and whatever they think can ‘change’ me.”
“My friends/co-workers no longer respect my bodily boundaries when I came out to them, because they no longer see me as someone who should be respected. They regularly touch, fondle, grope, and prod me without permission, and/or verbally harass me, and don’t take my objections seriously.”
“My family, friends, and co-workers no longer just harass me, but also anyone I’m currently dating because they view my significant other as pathetic, underserved, or even being abused.”
First Few Days Of Dating
“My date got irrationally angry and confrontational when I came out to them, in a manner that made me fearful.” (SO many of these.)
“My date immediately lost any respect they had for my boundaries, no longer asked for consent, and {tried to} force themselves upon me.” (A lot of these, too)
“My date tried to verbally circumvent any boundaries and issues I confessed to, and it made me feel like I was in danger.”
“I didn’t come out to my date at first, and when they found out, they radically changed their behavior in an attempt to control and manipulate our new relationship to their benefit.”
Long-Term Relationships
“My partner has forcefully and radically changed our long-term relationship after finding out about my asexuality, and I’m now trapped and controlled in a way that I wasn’t before.”
“My partner broke up with me/is fighting with me because of my asexuality, and trying to make it seem like I’m hurting them. It’s made me doubt myself and my ability to trust my own intentions.”
“My partner is slowly changing from what was once supportive of my asexuality, and I’m wondering when I have the right to be worried and when I’d be overreacting. I’m aware of the worst case scenario, but I also worry that I’m being selfish and childish - which are things I’ve been told all throughout my asexual experience.”
Self-Care And Self Development
“I don’t trust my ability to say either yes or no in sexual situations, and this has extended to my life in general. I don’t feel comfortable in my ability to self-determinate.”
“The lack of authority, definition, and schooling of the concept of asexuality has made me very uncomfortable with what I think I am, and that uncertainty haunts me every waking moment.”
“I think it’s too late/too early to tell if I’m asexual, but the longer I hesitate, the worse my mental health and emotional wellbeing gets. I’m effectively stuck.”
“I see no benefit in coming out, or even identifying as asexual. There’s no positivity, role models, or supportive community for what I consider a big and scary part of my overall identity.”
“I think this was sexual abuse, but I’m wondering if I’m just being selfish and childish.”
“I think I was treated badly by my parents/friends/partner, but I’m wondering if I’m just being selfish and childish.”
“I want to believe that I’m deserving of equal freedom and human respect paid to other, not asexual people, but people tell me I’m being selfish and childish.”
“No one encourages this part of me. And that makes me feel forgotten and abandoned in general.”
Shut the fuck up about your petty beef with tumblr bloggers and youtubers and Archie comics or whatever. I literally do not care, I can’t care. I see these messages every goddamn day - this post was written and drafted a month ago, and I very easily compiled most of this bulletpoint list from scratch, just by eyeing what I see in the askbox and what comes across my dash.
‘Ace discourse’ anger is empty and so meaningless. This is what I see by being part of this one 17k follow asexual ask blog for maybe half a year. I am so Done with all the faux rage posts and all the false positivity about how it’s ok to NOT be ace and all the acephobia that falls perfectly in line with the gaslighting typical of acephobia-101 while also having the audacity to claim it not so.
This is what’s real and I want to bleed it into your goddamn eyes.
#long post#qt lyfe#FRIENDLY REMINDER#IF YOU'RE AN APHOBE#UNFOLLOW ME NOW#GET YOUR UGLY NASTY ASS OFF MY BLOG THANKS
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Friendly reminder that
-trans men are men
-trans men are not, in any way, shape, or form, women
-trans men who are attracted to men are gay
-trans mlm are not straight girls fetishizing gay relationships
-trans mlm are not just cis girls with internalized misogyny
-trans mlm are valid and good
-i hope every trans mlm reading this has a good day
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Beware of “minajatwah and “minajatwahhh”. They will try to harass you into giving them free art and lay out terms and try to hold you to them. There is also hints of them taking and duplicating artists work, but they avoided my questions about it.
Telling me I need make their unpaid work a “priority for my sake” is a borderline threat. Why? What will happen if I don’t? People..
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Friendly reminder that this pride month is about more than just Homosexuals its about,
Everyone, Pansexuals, Bisexuals, Demisexuals, Polysexuals, ASEXUALS, Transgender people, Gender Binary, Gender non conforming, (etc.). Lets all work together to make sure everyone is represented not just one.
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Friendly reminder that asexuals, bisexuals and trans people absolutely get to celebrate pride month just as much as anyone else. It’s LGBTQIA+, not LG. This ain’t a fuckin electronics company.
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do you have any posts about it/ can you explain why ace and aro people are lgbt? ive only really heard the anti side of it. if someone is cis and both ace and aro are they lgbt? why? what about heteromantic asexuals and heterosexual aromantics?
1. They are a marginalized orientation
One reason for the discourse is the disconnect between the definitions of the LGBT+ community on both sides. The anti aro/ace side claims it’s for same gender attracted and trans people only while the pro aro/ace side says it’s for all marginalized orientations and gender identities. The anti aro/ace definition also excludes bi people who aren’t attracted to their own gender and intersex people who want to be part of the community.
Based on the pro aro/ace definition, aros/aces belong since they are marginalized orientations. Aphobes claim aromantic/asexual are modifiers not orientations, but that’s not true.
2. They are not straight
Heteroromantic aces and heterosexual aromantics are not straight because heteroromantic heterosexuals (aka the Real Straights) do not see them as one of them. Aros/aces are seen as abnormal, wrong, and undesirable.
Aphobes use “if there’s no straight aces then there’s no gay ace!!!” as a gotcha, but even if a heteroromantic asexual identifies as straight, they don’t have the same privileges as a heteromantic heterosexual since they can still be targeted for being asexual.
3. They are discriminated against for being aro/ace
A-spec people are denied access to mental health care, pathologized, dehumanized, sexually assaulted, coerced into sex, erased, etc.
The other side of the discourse says this is all misdirected forms of other oppression, but this argument makes no sense. By their logic, thinking being gay is a mental illness is misdirected ableism not homophobia. It also ignores that people are being targeted specifically for their aromantic/asexual identity.
4. They are wanted in the community
Many LGBT+ organizations include aromantics/asexuals and they are wanted in the LGBT+ community.
Further Reading: (x) (x) (x) (x) (x)
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ngl there are more overwatch characters probs don’t celebrate christmas than who do and also stop drawing the canonically muslim and hindu women in christmas shit
#i'm not even actively in the fandom or play the game but i know it's gonna be. Bad.#if blizzard doesn't fuck up then the fandom sure does haHAH#fuck#overwatch
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The huge DMC3 poster from @cinensis finally arrived!! I had to weight it down a bit to take a good photo, so naturally I used any and all DMC things I own.
And I even got a very nice-looking bracelet, it was keeping the poster from unrolling.
Thank you, Joshua! I love it!
#neyface#cinensis#DMC3#aaaaaaaaaaaaaa I can't wait to put it on my wall#I might need to get frames for it#i don't want to ruin it in any way like putting tape on the other side#CINENSIS I LOVE YOU THANK YOU AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
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Pssst you guys should follow my friend’s art blog, she has talent!
Wait, halloween’s over already ? Oops
Decided to continue practicing with this Halloween-ish character. Didn’t have enough time today to finish it, though. Actually, I’m not sure if I’ll be able to finish this before Wednesday since school and some other personal stuff are keeping me busy. Anyway, I’ll do my best and try to get this done before next weekend.
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shoutout to trans men who are repeatedly mistaken for lesbians
Including, but not limited to:
–gay trans men who just want a man and don’t have any interest in women and are repeatedly mistaken for lesbians, or even as straight girls
–straight trans men who are still read as women and are repeatedly mistaken for lesbians
–bi/pansexual trans men who aren’t romantically/sexually exclusive to women, and are not women themselves, and yet are still mistaken for lesbians
–nonbinary/genderqueer transmasculine people, regardless of sexuality, who may not be 100% men or women or are both or neither or somewhere inbetween and who still are repeatedly mistaken for lesbians when they don’t ID as such.
Guys, you rock and you’re important. you’ll find someone who loves you for who you truly are. don’t let others’ misconceptions of you hurt you.
Rock on, brothers.
#did you mean my life#if i got an euro for every time I've been mistaken for a butch lesbian#I'd be rich lemme tell you#also as a gay trans man...#hoooooo boy#qt lyfe
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Because people with dysthymia live with it for so long, its something that’s not really noticeable because we think that it’s just who we are.
It affects our daily lived.
Dysthyma and depression are not the same and don’t let people tell you otherwise. Dysthymia is less severe but it extends for years. Someone with dysthymia can still function a daily life.
#holy shit alright okay#that's me#how did i not realize this sooner#my sister definitely has this#pretty sure my mom does too#nd lyfe
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y'all think it’s gross when an adult man hits on an underage girl but when it’s an adult your pairing with an underage boy it’s fine bc you love to fetishize m/m sexual relationships lol
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