henchwenchxox
If I Be Waspish Best Beware My Sting
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bruhbest257
Bruh
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it'd take more than falling off a cliff to keep me from you
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MorganaCorp
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Nessa is dying (and writing stuff)
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Late to the show but!!!
sid is opposed to killing baby David because baby David isnt too blame for his future actions,,,
But at the end of the second season she was all for imprisoning him because furouk told her future sid said david would end the world?
Why is killing baby David for something he’d grow up to do immoral but imprisoning adult David for something he would do in the future acceptable
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‘Tis finally not a day to mourn, but rather celebrate.
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Top 20 Funniest Things about Star Wars, in No Particular Order
1. Darth Maul repeatedly dying and then randomly turning up for absolutely no narrative reason, exclusively to ruin Obi-Wan’s day
2. Hondo Ohnaka in general
2.a. Bonus: Hondo and Maul competing to be Ezra’s Weird Crime Uncle
3. Dave Filoni being forced to spend 6 7 seasons doing narrative backflips to keep Anakin and Grievous from meeting, because of one throwaway line in ROTS about Grievous being short
4. The B1 Battle Droids in any given moment of the Clone Wars, but especially during the movie
e.g. those two droids on top of the cliff at Teth, arguing about seeing the approaching clone army and fighting over the binoculars, and one of them just fuckin FALLS of the cliff and the other one goes “get BACK HERE sergeant”
also e.g. Rex and like, one other guy, completely surrounded by droids and Rex is like “surrender! we have you outnumbered!” and one of the droids is like “hang on” and actually stARTS COUNTING
5. Grievous bailing hard the moment anything goes remotely wrong
6. Anakin stabbing a guy in cold blood as the Imperial March plays in the background and then looking all offended at Obi-Wan and going “WHAT? he was gonna blow up the ship!”
7. Dave Filoni’s incessant need to put wolves in Star Wars
8. the fact that the Mandalorian almost died and earned his clan signet on an errand to fetch brunch for a bunch of jawas
9. Rex’s plan on the Rishi Moon base: “ok so to get into the base currently occupied by droids, i’m going to hold a droid head up to the camera and do my best droid impression and ask them nicely to open the door” and it WORKED
bonus 9.a: that same episode, Cody’s reaction to Rex shooting one of their brothers (as far as he knew) right in the face was “HECK”
10. Kallus, to Ezra and Kanan: ok you have to knock me out so i don’t get caught as a spy. it has to be convincing.
Ezra: ok *uses the force to fucking YEET kallus through like three panes of glass*
Kanan: EZRA
Ezra: WHAT? that is convincing
Kanan: yeah, but i was gonna do it
11. Kylo Ren stalking into the war room and going “i sense… unease… about my appearance.” and all the generals rushing to compliment his new mask
12. those two stormtroopers in TFA walking around the corner, seeing Kylo Ren having a tantrum and beating up a console with his lightsaber, and just quietly backing away
13. Stormtrooper bonking his head in A New Hope
14. Rex bonking his head on a pipe
15. “It’s ok that we’re here.” “It’s ok that you’re here.” “It’s GREAT that you’re here.” “You’re relieved that we’re here.” “THANK GOODNESS you’re here” “Welcome, guys.”
16. the fact that Palpatine was is still so pissed off about Anakin slam-dunking him down the garbage chute at the end of Return of the Jedi that he had a giant pit built in his Secret Backup Fortress specifically so that he could throw Anakin’s grandson down it thirty years later like that level of PETTINESS
17. Darth Bane was voiced by MARK FUCKING HAMIL
18. Boba Fett dies by blind, confused Han Solo going “BOBA FETT?? WHERE????” and spinning around and accidentally backhanding him into the Sarlacc Pit (of course he’s not really dead shhhhhh fuck you disney)
19. those two scout troopers in episode 8 of the Mandalorian, having captured Baby Yoda and radioing in to try to tell Moff Gideon that they captured the asset like “is he available yet” “yeah, he just killed an officer for interrupting him, so it could be a while.” “ugh ok whatever. Standing by. Still.”
20. the fact that, from Obi-Wan’s point of view, ROTS is just fucking bonkers. Like, he and Anakin rescue the chancellor, everything’s going well, he tells Anakin he’s proud of him, and then he leaves to kill Grievous and just when he succeeds and the war is just about over, Cody tries to shoot him off a cliff and when he makes it back to Coruscant, Anakin is slaughtering a bunch of children and swearing allegiance to a Sith Lord and Obi-Wan has NO IDEA what the FUCK happened there
21. Twilight of the Apprentice from Darth Vader’s point of view: you chase down a bunch of Rebels to a secret Sith Planet. You go to the Temple. Surprise! Your old apprentice is there, along with some random jedi kid. She forces the kid to flee the collapsing temple, and then you proceed to have a big ol’ lightsaber fight but like THIRTY SECONDS LATER, a portal opens up in mid-air, the SAME KID but with a different haircut pops out, grabs your apprentice, and just fuckin vanishes. Poof. Gone. Like, that is just something that happened to Darth Vader one day and it’s just something he had to deal with.
22. JJ Abrams dedicating an entire scene in Rise of Skywalker to calling out Rian Johnson’s shitty Luke-related decisions from TLJ. Rey throwing away the lightsaber and ForceGhost!Luke catching it and going “wow hey maybe treat a Jedi’s weapon with a little more respect RIAN” and “hey Rey don’t do what I did and fuck off to the ass-end of nowhere for twenty years and refuse to do anything useful because that was really stupid and pointless and out of character of me, wasn’t it RIAN”
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Spoilers:
Love how personal darth maul took obi wan cutting his legs off and trying to kill him
I mean he was literally doing the same thing. He killed qui gon and tried to kill obi wan but yeay obi wan is the dick for what he did
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They say, “You’re a little much for me, you’re a liability. You’re a little much for me”
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#how to get over someone, a 10 step program by Harley Quinn
BONUS:
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Les Mis characters as John Mulaney quotes
Thanks to my friends in Sewerchat and Discorinthe for helping me brainstorm some of these! I didn’t do all the Amis but there are already several versions of this post with all the Amis so *shrug*
Valjean:
Javert:
Fantine:
Thenardier:
Les Amis as a group:
Enjolras:
Grantaire:
Marius:
Cosette:
Eponine:
Gavroche:
BONUS
Victor Hugo:
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*Lemony Snicket voice* The word ‘poison’ here can mean many things. 'Poison’ may literally refer to the presence of an unwashed llama in a stream from which a nearby village likely collects its drinking water. Likewise, it may figuratively refer to the effect of greed and isolation on the priorities of a young ruler, or the machinations of a villainous royal advisor on the health and wellbeing of said young ruler. In this case, however, 'poison’ most literally refers to the poison, the poison for Kuzco, the poison chosen especially to kill Kuzco, Kuzco’s poison… That poison.
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Reasons Capes Should Come Back Into Fashion
1. Keeps arms warm but is not sleeves
2.Cozy Mini Blanket
3.If you do it right, you can look Mysterious or Menacing
3.5. Or you might look like a hobbit, but that’s not necessarily a bad thing
4.swish swish
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How is phil the only person who thought of checking the barrel store door?
Hunter and mel could have gotten away no siege no hostage situation if they had just checked that bloody door
Instead hunters like nah I’ll march a hostage through a busy pub full of people who’ll recognise me while on the run while holding a gun. That’ll work
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The beginning and the end, much closer than they seem. Death is but a dream.
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Spider Baby
When mysterio is throwing illusions at peter and says if he was better tony might not have died
Me : fight me bitch! Who the actual fuck fo you think you are. Suggesting this poor spider baby was not enough and responsible for his dads deaths !
#spiderman#spider-man far from home#peter parker#mysterio#spider man#marvel#mcu#marvel cinematic universe#tony stark#iron man
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“I’ll go to alyssa milano” you go Rogelio
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Can everyone please stop being mean to aziraphale? He’s such a sweet lovely little angel who tries so hard to be nice and do the right thing and so many people are being so mean to him
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