Patroclus’ Murmurings
First: “Is clinging to a memory what keeps the soul from fading? Why then, would that I could simply leave that glimmer of my past behind, for there is nothing for me here…”
“It makes no difference to me either way. I spent so much of my short life alone, but now, what is this lingering and meaningless experience, where for eternity all I’ve to think on is a few bright glimpses that I spent with him, not by myself?”
“Why does the soul remain, after the body bleeds, and dies, and turns to ash? Is this the final cruelty of the gods? Or evidence, perhaps, that we have some immortal stuff in us ourselves.”
“…Why was I brought here, to be left alone? Where did you go…what did you do?”
“…You’re wallowing away somewhere, the same as I, but where…? And why not here?”
“…But you must hate me so, to have abandoned me among these noble champions and kings…”
“Is clinging to a memory what keeps the soul from fading? Why then, would that I could simply leave that glimmer of my past behind, for there is nothing for me here…”
“…Truly the must the gods despise us, each in turn, to have divided us like this…”
“Is this how you decided to repay me? Why, you must think that I abandoned you, in life, when I went off to war without you, is that it? You think I had a choice?”
“…Where are you now, I wonder, and what thoughts are running through your mind…?”
“…So then, I’ll just keep waiting here, I guess. No time to lose, hahaha.”
“…What more could I have even done? Could I have swayed you, any other way? I tried, with all my might, with all my heart, you must know that, and still, it was never enough…”
“…To think, he could have…none of this, it didn’t have to be…”
“What qualifies a man to this eternity in so-called paradise? Even in death, there is no justice. I knew so many peaceful, decent men, but none of course are here. Instead, it is the warriors. The kings. The slayers. Great men? The standard for greatness is low, indeed.”
“…It’s all forgettable, with just a single drink, and yet, I always hesitate…”
“…You chose to die in glory, not to live in peace…and all for what? Such a waste, all for your foolish pride, that you should care more to be remembered by those you shall never know than to be loved…”
“…What we were once, I wonder if it’s but a falsely ringing memory of mine…”
“…The Fates decided this for us, I guess, and so…who are we to complain…?”
“When we were both alive, I…thought you were invincible. I knew of no one, nothing stronger, other than the love we shared. Was I deceived, in thinking this of you, of us?”
“…He was always, you were always such a stubborn fool…”
“…Truly must the gods despise us, each in turn, to have divided us like this…”
“…I ought to have been cast into the meadows of sprawling Asphodel, not here, not with these kings and braggarts. What am I doing here? Waiting, lingering, transfixed on something that was never mine, something I never had…then, what am I to do?”
“You made the choice, not me, and you prolonged that war, when you knew just as well as anyone you could have ended it! But you refused. And now I’m here. And you? You’re somewhere else…”
“…So damned obstinate, about every detail…always so unyielding, to your doom…”
“…I thought hat I was lost, just…wandering, but, not even moving, just…being here…”
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