The grass will always grow where you water it and sometimes the grass will grow an extra surprise in the form of a Pleated Inkcap Mushroom that only has a 24 hour lifespan. ❤️ 🍄 🌞 💦 🌱 I had an entire relationship with this mushroom and all of its mushroom friends! It was love and it only lasted a short time! Some efforts only have a short spanned reward or surprise, but it is worth it!❤️ #growth #wateryouryard #grassisgreenerwhereyouwaterit #mushrooms #mushroomsofinstagram #shrooms🍄 #love #presence #mindfulness #love https://www.instagram.com/p/CMw0vAfHtWQ/?igshid=14dfbmp215bci

The adversity of one’s own journey makes space to shelter another. The tree doesn’t ask questions, it simply holds the space. (at Austin, Texas) https://www.instagram.com/p/CLFhuKTnZWU/?igshid=y0pjmi66vhcm

I would like to share a thought with you, my fellow human loves. As I was walking off of a trail with my friend @sandie.cuch , the trail looked different on our way out than it did on our way in. It was slightly disorienting. And I was given this statement from the beautiful trees, sky, leaves and all that there is, “Everything looks different from where you’re standing and you can only stand where you have been”. We are all learning. That moment helped me resonate with a piece of myself that identifies as simply having love and compassion because every single one of us can only stand from the view point from where we have lived, the environment we have grown up in, and our ability to go within to discover and stand in our own authentic truth. I make one choice as one human towards all of you. I choose to stand in love, act in love and treat you with love. And I have so much gratitude for the lesson(s) that you are showing me every single day. I felt inspired to share thanks to an energy session I recently had with @tammydemirza because this woman is the purest love. Thank you my friend! And thank you Sandra for loving on me during our weekend visit! 🙏 #chooselove #perspective #loveforhumanity #loveforthegoodguysandthe”bad”guys #wherehaveyoubeen #iloveyou #createyourreality #isntthismeerkatadorable #hegetswhatimsaying #iloveyoubecauseiloveme https://www.instagram.com/p/CK98_PRHCOW/?igshid=4y2qulit4l3d

I would like to share a thought with you, my fellow human loves. As I was walking off of a trail with my friend @sandie.cuch , the trail looked different on our way out than it did on our way in. It was slightly disorienting. And I was given this statement from the beautiful trees, sky, leaves and all that there is, “Everything looks different from where you’re standing and you can only stand where you have been”. We are all learning. That moment helped me resonate with a piece of myself that identifies as simply having love and compassion because every single one of us can only stand from the view point from where we have lived, the environment we have grown up in, and our ability to go within to discover and stand in our own authentic truth. I make one choice as one human towards all of you. I choose to stand in love, act in love and treat you with love. And I have so much gratitude for the lesson(s) that you are showing me every single day. I felt inspired to share thanks to an energy session I recently had with @tammydemirza because this woman is the purest love. Thank you my friend! And thank you Sandra for loving on me during our weekend visit! 🙏 #chooselove #perspective #loveforhumanity #loveforthegoodguysandthe”bad”guys #wherehaveyoubeen #iloveyou #createyourreality #isntthismeerkatadorable #hegetswhatimsaying #iloveyoubecauseiloveme https://www.instagram.com/p/CK98_PRHCOW/?igshid=4y2qulit4l3d

Gratitude for learning, loving, and growing! 🙏

Avoidance of Boundaries

Many of us can relate to growing up in households that did not have great boundaries. In my specific home, there were no bed times, poorly communicated limits, physical discipline that crossed lines, and often times scenarios where taking on someone else’s feelings or making oneself responsible for another’s feelings were the norm. Oh! And to all my other Latino friends out there, you may know this, but the word “boundaries”, in this context, does not have a translation in Spanish. It is no wonder that our culture is more familiar with the word “limits”. Keep in mind that you have already crossed boundaries once you get to limits. (Please know that I do not have judgement or resentment towards my parents as they were doing the best they could, and they were a much improved version of what they grew up with. I love them so much!).

Friends of Earth, I have a new awareness today that I did not have two days ago! I have spent most of my life Avoiding the need to  set up healthy boundaries like a beast! If you remember, this path is about making new decisions, choosing to step into engagement, and using all experiences as learning opportunities to catapult growth. So, I changed my mind and plan to be the Queen of Boundaries, or at least a Dutchess or something until I get the hang of things.

Yesterday, my boyfriend made a joke that rubbed me slightly the wrong way. In my old life, I would have chosen to get mad/sad, give my power away, let the emotion burn deep inside, allowed my mind to spiral and create scenarios, lingered in the state of “why did this happen and why did he say that to me... doesn’t he know better! I’m a good person, I don’t have to put up with this! I don’t even know how to bring this up to him. What value does my word or opinion really have anyway?”, only to bury it, and then settle to be a victim... of a casual joke that had no ill intention. Gosh! That was exhausting!

Today, I have so much more perspective. My mentor (Tammy De Mirza) has brought to my attention that I do not/did not have any boundaries. Through her guidance, I now have awareness that growing up with unhealthy and minimal boundaries as a child lead to me become a slightly taller version of that child and a disempowered adult.

Frequently finding myself suppressing opinions, not having a clear sense of my own identity, and not feeling empowered enough to make decisions, became the unconscious norm and status quo of my life.

When I was married, I found myself relying on my partner for happiness, depending on him to make big decisions, allowing him to manage a significant portion of our responsibilities, and eventually I found myself fearing a life without him. Self battery talk looks like this: “What would being without him look like? What is my value if I’m not in this relationship? Well, this partner is much better than several partners before him and he takes care of me, so I will walk on eggshells to keep the peace and I will be accommodating in order to be the perfect wife and mother so I do not loose this portion of my identity. I don’t really need to share my opinion with him because he won’t really get me and that could put me at risk of not being valued”. (What the actual ***k! Yes, the real life Janet has a really trashy mouth with a loving disposition. Namaste y’all!).

Fast forward to today, and I don’t even know who that person is anymore, but I do remember her. Today, I CHOOSE a commitment to myself to prioritize my opinions, goals, needs and values on a totally different level going forward while keeping in mind that the growth process takes practice and actual execution!

So, how did I address the sweet, goofy boyfriend who made a joke that I could discern as being outside of my comfort zone? I honored my feeling. I did not like his joke and told him that I did not find it funny. I also explicitly stated, “I am drawing a hard boundary” on this joke and these are other parameters that fall under this same guideline. His response: “Fair enough and understood as well as respected”. He also knows that I value change in behavior in addition to the apology. The true apology is the change of behavior.

Now, how does avoidance play into the disliked joke? In the past, old Janet (the one that existed Before Tammy... we’ll discuss my life BT and AT in another post) would not have said anything at all, and buried this emotion because it did not necessarily have value or a right to be expressed. This would have been me simply repeating patterns of the childhood and not honoring myself. This type of action frequently resulted in me carrying emotional weight and even illness.

I am still learning how to walk in my truth and speak it, so I am thankful for a mentor that helps me with these realizations and a boyfriend who has a high emotional intellect and is compassionate. These two offer a safe space and make it easy for me to want to come out of the protective shell I have worn most of my life. It is freeing!

Waking up to the fact that avoidance has been a huge result of an emotional crippling I experienced growing up is so refreshing. It makes it easier to simply observe the avoidance and lack of boundaries as a predicament and a choice. So, today and going forward, I choose to overcome my predicament.

Though it may look small, this exchange of words with my boyfriend has been such a great act of self-love. I now understand why showing another person boundaries is love, for both the other person and self.

Love you guys!

Janet

P.S. Belief Systems = BS. Now sit with that for just one moment.

A significant portion of my insight came from Tammy’s Power to Choose Program™️ where she really has you observe your life as a reality that you are creating. I highly recommend it if you are ready to make true changes in your life. ❤️ 🙏

Avoidance: In all areas of life

Are you a procrastinator? Do you find yourself avoiding small mundane tasks or even avoiding your personal bank account and finances? Well hello my friend! We may be related, soul mates, or at least playmates with the same difficulties on Earth’s school of learning.  Would you like to get real about the theme of avoidance? Avoidance plagues many humans without any clear awareness of what they are doing or why they are doing it.

The following is a year long journey of choosing to change my life. I will be journaling about a pivotal point of awareness and how avoidance has been a key pattern in all things related to engaging with and overcoming the obstacles of my daily life and relationships. I would like to begin with the fact that I should be working right now and I find myself not engaging in work at this moment because as I mentioned, I am active participant in delay avoidant behavior. I am fascinated by self and those that are also members of the avoidant community because it seems as though we would naturally understand why we delay and avoid, and why we allow ourselves to do this until things get messy or are about to blow up in our face, but we repeat the pattern.

Do you find yourself giggling with a “that’s me” or having a “hmmm” moment my friend? Well, I did too, until I read the first chapter of my boss’s book and had a come to Jesus moment where I realized that we have relationships with all things, and my personal relationship with all things and people had a common factor… avoidance!

To all of my other delay avoidant brothers, sisters and procrastinators out there, please join me in this year of confronting the obvious cycle of self-sabotage, running away, avoiding the need to set up healthy boundaries, avoiding picking self and healthy choices, the avoidance of getting more familiar with my authentic self, avoiding forgiving where necessary, avoiding getting into alignment with my purpose, getting my s**t together, cleaning up the act, and loving myself through every bit of it.

Through looking at my avoidant behavior, I started to have more realization about my choices, and I acknowledged how my perspectives and perceptions of past events were driving my choices in every aspect of my life. After enrolling in my spiritual mentor’s (Tammy De Mirza) The Power to Choose Program™️, I was able to observe trauma that lead to poor self-care, ideas and belief systems about men that lead me to never fully engage in a relationship with the opposite sex, how claiming the identity of a victim left me in a victimized state, how taking on false identities influenced by others around me steered me to believe more in limitation than possibility, how whatever I do focus upon expands, and honestly, the list goes on. I invite you to an intimate and transparent look into my life as I unveil avoidance around co-dependency and enabling as well. I can almost hear a, “Haha, no way am I doing that.”, or “No way that I have ever done that in anyway.”, but chances are that we do or we have stood as an active contributor or beneficiary of co-dependent/enabling acts. I still struggle with both of these at this very moment.

I look forward to openly uncovering the gunk in my life that has been contributing to my excuses, sharing the avoidance that has been preventing me from living my life fully, and transitioning into empowerment. I hope I am able to share some enlightening perspective with one of you that may be in need of some personal insight to your life. The universe has a tendency to pair us and therefore there is no coincidence that you are reading this article. Much love to all of you and I trust that this information will help one of you.

*Note

As mentioned, I joined Tammy De Mirza’s Power to Choose Program and if you feel the need to step up your life, make real changes and grow in empowerment, you can change your life by enrolling. It completely changed my life: https://www.tammydemirza.com/powertochoose.html

I have been mentoring with Tammy De Mirza. Every time I work with this woman, I have new healing, miracles, phenomenon, and upgrades in my physical life, spiritual gifts and huge empowerment shifts. This was recorded right after a session I had with here where she mentions that I had 5 new guides join my team after committing to the spiritual work on a totally new level. They are hanging out at all times and even play with my kids! ❤️ Wild! I love this life!