i'd be a liar if i said i wasn't in it from the beginning but royo really has my whole heart

[id: a sketch of roman of reston, captioned with a post by sirkayleeofcamelot reading "*becomes a knight strictly because the local bard is cute, and I want him to write songs about me*", and youngblood, captioned with a reblog to that post by big-blog-of-cheese-day reading "*becomes a bard strictly because the local knight is cute and I want to write songs about him*". end id]

Pronouns!!!!!!!!

microdosing on transgenderism by buying items "for men" at the store

When you read “y/n,” do you

a. mentally substitute it for your actual name

b. read it as “why-enn”

c. mentally pronounce it like a word (“yinn”/“yenn” etc)

Reblog and put in the tags who you main in Mario Kart

Sanders Sides Incorrect Quotes (SuperCut)

CW for food and eyestrain!

gosh i feel this. my parents are absolutely in the middle of the accepting spectrum, and i don't know anybody whose parents reacted exactly the same as mine. my parents were so okay with me being gay, to this day they don't give a fuck about what the person i could one day bring home would look like gender wise. but, they also are super not chill with me being trans, mainly, i think, because they don't understand it, and as a family we've never done Serious conversations, so i would always feel extremely awkward and end up crying when i tried to bring up my gender, before anything important was really said. i think my mother still believes i'm trans to hurt her, because she wanted a daughter all three times she was pregnant and i have two older cis brothers. but the unacceptance wasn't to the point of kicking me out, it just kinda went,,, unspoken. my mail had my preferred name, they knew it was for me; they still used my deadname and old pronouns; i was allowed to buy men's clothing but not trousers or jeans; i could talk about how gay i was until the world collapsed if i wanted to but i had to be very careful mentioning anything related to my gender, the experience wasn't great but i was never made homeless or anything like that, and it's wild that out of all the gay and trans friends i know, i'm the only one with this experience. it would do wonders to make this grey area more well known, it would've saved me so many years of turmoil.

I feel like we always see parents who are 100% super supportive allies, or parents who are horrible and cruel.  At least in media or in the most popular stories.  But I feel like that ignores just how many people have parents where you just have no idea?  And even if you think they’ll accept you on a surface level, you don’t know if they have a breaking point.  Especially if you need to go on hrt, or request they change the way they think about and refer to you.  Sure they’re liberal and all, or centrists, or “tolerant”, but how far does that stretch?

I think most closeted LGBT+ kids live like this, wading around in the grey area.  I’d like it of more of us knew that was normal, I’d like if we talked about it more.

Sarai from Strange the Dreamer! this book was insane, in a good way of course lol

Stardew Valley is wild cause it’s this fun wholesome little game where you raise animals and grow crops and get married but it also has monsters and dwarves and the mayor and rancher lady are secretly fucking and it’s heavily implied the shop owner’s daughter is actually an illegitimate child his wife had with the local wizard and there’s a note from your grandpa saying he’s gonna return from the grave and visit you on the dawn of your third year in the valley

describe your dnd characters in the worst way possible

7 + 8 = 15

2 + 4 = 6

60 + 10 + 5 = 75

I love "how do you do math?" questions. Here's how my brain does it:

How about you guys?

Soulmate au fic that I really wanna write where Janus is soulmates with everyone(aka DLAMPR) but soulmates stay the same every lifetime but theres a chance to have multiple soulmates and in rare cases you don’t meet them all in that life before you or your soulmates dies.(especially in janus’s case, for reasons i’ll get into shortly) With each life once you hit a certain age(say somewhere between 19-20) and/or meet your soulmate, you gain the memory of every life you’ve had in the past, specifically the life you lived with your soulmate.(also soulmates arent inherently romantic in this world, and i’ll mention that roman and remus are always inherently platonic soulmates to eachother, and are often born as twins to eachother, and if not, are often always the first meet in their group)

Janus is a very special case, and in their world considered almost an anomaly.

All the information gained in the world is supplied from his soulmates, who at the end of each of their current lives always end up together as a group, though it on average happens pretty early on in their lives, minus janus.

Janus is an anomaly because it seems that he’s dying every lifetime time that he meets one of his soulmates, lost to the world 24 hours after hes come into direct physical contact with the first of his soulmates in that lifetime.

(Check the tags for trigger warnings before reading!)

In the first lifetime, he meets Patton(who, in this life, is not called Patton), a young baker who takes his hand with excitement, the barest brush of skin alone triggering not a memory of a past life, but instead a brilliant feeling of connection, a soul-deep aknowledgement that their souls are brand new, and infact are connected to a whole group of souls. Patton is overtaken by a whole new kind of excitement. Janus matches it, and they plan an outting for the very next morning. Janus does not make it to the outting, succumbing to a stab wound just hours after meeting Patton while on his walk home. Patton meets the rest of their soulmates while waiting for Janus to arrive. They hear about his death a week later.

The in second lifetime, he briefly meets Virgil, theyre 16 and 17 respectively. He doesnt learn much, the brief brush of skin while waiting in a croud for a train, enough to distract him into turning around just enough to meet eyes with Virgil, who had been on a train back to meet the rest of their soulmates, an exclamation of relieved surprise on the tip of Janus’s tongue. And then Jan trips, or someone impatiently shoves at him and he loses his footing, niether of them really know for sure. One moment they feel the euphoria of their souls connecting, the next Virgil feels the bond instantly shatter alongside his heart as he watches Janus disappear under the oncoming train. Virgil spends that lifetime traumatized by his sudden death, guilt ridden in knowing their soulmate’s last lifetime’s death had ended in a similar fashion even in mer secs, and his soul takes on a much more cautious nature from then on.

In the third lifetime, he meets Remus, theyre 18. Remus manages to spend a whole hour with Janus before they touch, and it’s only because Janus talks him out of jumping off a bridge. Remus wasn’t being suicidal, just hyper moridly curious, but Janus didn’t know that. Janus strikes up a conversation with him, its snarky and fun and perfect, and Janus joins him on the railing as they talk. Janus derails Remus from jumping by mentioning that he’s never had sushi, and to Remus this is an afront to living. Remus hops back over to the safe side of the railing, declaring to fix that crisis immediately. Janus laughs and agrees, relaxing visibly. The relaxing is a mistake, as for a single second Janus forgets that hes still in a dangerous position. He slips, his hand missing the railing, Remus only just barely managing to catch his hand in time but he doesnt get a good enough grasp, the spark that triggers their soul connection distracting enough that Janus’s hands slip from Remus’s, and Remus is forced to watch in horror as Janus plummets to his doom. He scrambles to fish Janus out of the river, but they cant revive him, Janus died on impact. Remus doesn’t meet the rest of their soulmates for another three years. He never touches sushi again for the rest of that lifetime

In the forth, Roman is 17, Janus is 18, and Janus actually meets Roman multiple times, knowing full well what his life has in store, neither ever knowing. Roman and Janus are actors for the two main characters for an up and coming movie, and they get along super well. Janus has always worn gloves, scarves, long sleeves and jeans, hoodies, beanies. Its a bit taboo at such a young age, but Janus never seems to mind the controversy and never commets on it, and Roman doesn’t mind either. Janus is infact very withdrawn, and often gives very little input on what his true personality is and so Roman doesn’t push it. Later, he really, really wishes he did. Inevitably, they become closer. But it’s only until after the movie is released that Janus lets his walls down just a little. Somehow, he seems to know that Roman is his soulmate long before theyve actually touched. Somehow, for some reason that they just cant seem to fathom, at the end of a large event for the movie, Janus and Roman are being ushered away from eachother and into seperate cars to avoid an influx of fans for some reason or another, Roman doesn’t remember what. All he remembers is Janus taking a glove off his hand and brushing Roman’s cheek after he wished Roman an odd farewell. Not a see you later, just “Farewell, my Prince.” In perfect sync with a very specific line that Janus’s character had said. Roman is in too much shock by the time he’s in his own car, the past three lifetimes of memory flashing through his head taking just long enough to settle into dread as he realizes. He panics, he tries to get someone to listen, and by god do they try, but no one can get into contact with Janus in time. Janus dies in a freak car crash just minutes after they touched, dead on impact. Roman and his soulmates hold onto this movie for the rest of this lifetime, the last physical record left behind by the soulmate that fate just wont let them meet.

In the fifth, he meets Logan, each at age 21, Logan is a nurse in training, and Janus is a cashier, a college student just starting to work towards getting their law degree. By this point Logan has met all of their soulmates, and they all live in a flat together. Really, these days they all sit in wait, they have a plan amongst themselves, about what to do when they meet Janus, a last resort, a trying attempt to keep him alive just long enough to break that 24 hour threshold, to break the spell, to be able to say they did something to try and save him. So its truely a shame that in this lifetime, Janus is bleeding out from a gunshot wound by the time Logan is able to reach him. Its late at night, the police have been called, but it seems Janus was in the wrong place at the wrong time, and finds himself bleeding out on the tile floor. He doesn’t struggle, he doesn’t panic. When Logan approaches, he instead smiles sadly, and reaches his hand out to Logan. On instinct Logan takes it, just before he processes hearing Janus greet him with “Hello, Soulmate.” In vain, Logan tries to staunch the bleeding, but he’s done all he can do, and they know the real paramedics will be 2 minnutes too late. So they sit there, covered in Janus’s blood at 2 am in the middle of a shoddy convenience store, talking quietly about life and how their soulmates love them. There are tears in Logan’s eyes as Janus smiles sadly, knowingly up at Logan. He reaches his hand up and cradles Logans face, and asks Logan to “never forget to smile, okay?” Logan ends up leaving nursing, his mental health unable to take the soul-deep wound that incapacitates him when surrounded by the call of death.

In their sixth life, his soulmates wait, the group meets at age 23, and feel renewed hope as each month passes that they do not experience another traumatic death in their midst. Around age 30, confusion sets in, the hollow itch of meeting their last soulmate is dulled, almost non existant. They’d believe it gone if they didn’t feel it whisper to them late at night where theyre all gathered together. By the time their 60, the whisper seems to fade, and they slowly mourn the loss of the loved one they never got to have. Janus’s soul infact does not make it to the sixth lifetime, but not for lack of trying. His soulmates don’t want to believe it, waiting for his arrival to the very last of their days in this lifetime and never meeting him, they refuse to voice that they mightve lost Janus for good..

Fate has instead taken hold of his feeble soul, the weakest soul in an already unusually huge soulmate group, his soul only half as strong as it should be to balance fate in each lifetime, and so weak that his soul collapses under the amount of soulpower that reaches out to his own when his soul meets the others, and the fates are agitated by the constant unbalance of what should be their greatest and most intricately created group of soulmates yet. So the fates decided to hold onto his soul for a single lifetime, and spends the years mending and healing and strengthening his soul, practically filling in a full half of his soul, and spending years merging it while still carefully balancing his connection with his soulmates perfectly. The trade off is that the tampering and adjusting of his soul fucks with his soulmate memory trigger. He doesn’t forget, no, but his access to his previous lifetime memories is staggered, and so it takes months before he gets back all of his pevious lifetime memories, leaving the inital soulmate connection actually connecting but not immediately supplying his soul with any information of his own first 5 lives, leaving him blank at the start, though knowing that he and his soulmates soul’s are still older than being a brand new soul without memories, and doesn’t actually have a point in his lifetimes when he his an age and his past lifetime memories come to him, he /has/ to meet his soulmates to trigger those memories. The fates are very particular about him, keen on not providing this group with anymore unnessesary trauma.

So, imagine Janus’s genuine confusion, in his sixth life and his soulmate’s seventh life, at age 23 when he approaches a group at a college party on a whim to chat/flatter/flirt with the infamous Remus Sanders, the local social cryptid who always raises more questions than answers when you talk to him and who, Janus has learned, is a highly entertained arsonist-wannabe, and Janus knows that it’s smart to have contacts, because who knows when he’ll be need of someone who’ll commit arson with him? It just happened to be an hour earlier that Remy had spilled soda on his gloves, so he’s braving this interaction without a safety barrier but he’s heard Remus has all his soulmates already, all four of them to be exact, so he doesnt think he has much of a reason to worry. He manages to slide into the conversation easily, and none of Remus’s soulmates seem bothered by his intrusion, especially when he takes the eccentric way that Remus speaks in stride without even a pause, they just seem exasperated when he sneakily brings up the topic of fire.

Then Remus takes him by the shoulders, grinning at him almost crazily, and states “You. I like you” and, it’s obviously instinctive, the graceful way he laughs and puts a hand on Remus’s to agree, but of course the moment skin touches skin, their souls link and everything sparks. And then Remus shutters, and stares, his jaw going slack but his hands seem to grip Janus tighter. And for a moment, Janus finds it terribly, terribly fitting that he’s soulmates with a filterless pyromaniac, but then he remembers that Remus also has soulmates, and then the panic sets in because, assumably, that makes them his soulmates too.

Imagine Janus’s confusion when instead of being met with joy, he suddenly finds himself tucked carefully yet securely into Remus’s arms, being rocked by a man whose suddenly panicked and almost manically whispering “it’s him, hes here, it’s him.” Any move he makes to pull away even a little is met with a sob, Remus is crying, and Janus is so very confused. He tries to coo and comfort Remus, but each of their other soulmates crowd around them, touching his skin one by one, none of them moving away, his skin is burning from touch starvation, its a lot, its to much, its not enough, it burns.

It takes Janus over an hour, after being shuffled into a corner and placed in another soulmate’s lap, Janus thinks his name is Patton, to come back to himself, and finds his soulmates can’t stop touching him. He, too, feels the zing with each touch, the specific innate and undeniable feeling of ‘soulmate, soulmate, soulmate’ but he feels that hes very specifically out of some kind of loop considering all of his soulmates are crying.

When the fates whisper to them, three hours in, with the words “his soul was weak, we have fixed the issue, he is now yours for life to keep, he will safely continue.”

And while Janus requires quite a bit of catch-up, he feels like nows not the best time to ask. He feels more than sees the collective relief that sweeps through his soulmates, he lets them crowd around him further, touching and holding and assuring themselves and eachother that hes real, hes there, he’s staying alive, hes going to be safe. He tries not to say too much, doesn’t want to step on any sore spots, and finds theres tears in his eyes as well. He just lets himself be passed from lap to lap, and somehow or another they manage to all safely arrive at their joined home, pilling up a pillowfort into the livingroom and putting on a movie. Not once does he leave the hold of at least one soulmate, and finds at least two other hands on his person at a time up until he’s sat in the middle of the pillowfort(after he was allowed to get ready alongside the others for bed. He ends up in an oversized nasa hoodie that belongs to Logan) and the others begin to just, talk about life. Its too early to talk about the extreme protectiveness that theyve all treated him with each second, like hes about to dissapear at any moment. The thought makes him shudder, and he tries not to dwell on it.

Turns out, Virgil has the best idea of the night, suddenly and carefully kissing him, which triggers a bit of a domino effect, where Janus goes gently from soulmate to soulmate and trades kisses and hugs until everyone is breathless and giggling wetly with emotion.

And, when he wakes up the next morning, refusing to leave the warmth that is Roman’s chest and whining when Logan, who’d been acting as his other warm big spoon, start pulling away to start the day. And for the first time in this lifetime, Logan startlingly quickly relents and actually returns to their makeshift bed, pressing closer to Janus in an instant to hear his happy, sleepy hum. None of them get up for hours, and when they finally do, they order takeout, and dont stray far from eachother in the coming days.

Its the start of something new, something beautiful.

Something completely and finally whole.

roceit + books? - kas-cas🧡

"This is boring," Roman announced loudly, slamming the book before him closed.

Janus looked up from his own copy, a smile gracing his lips. "I thought you'd enjoy Othello, Drama Club."

Roman hummed dismissively. "We finally have time together, and we spend it doing homework." He huffed. "Don't you think we have better things to do?"

"Like what?"

"Like this." Roman kissed Janus' cheek. "And this—" Another kiss, slightly lower. "—and this—" One on his cheekbone, one almost on his jaw. "—and—"

Janus caught Roman's lips with his own, smiling into the kiss as Roman softened, wrapping an arm around his shoulders as if Janus would slip away from him if he didn't hold on. Janus pulled Roman into his lap, his hand lightly brushing over the small of his back—Roman's surprise made him gentle, letting Janus take the lead until their lips parted so they could breathe.

"What if I read to you?"

"Hm?" Puzzled, Roman frowned at him—his chest was still rising and falling heavily; he melted into Janus' touch. Almost certainly reading was the last thing on his mind.

"Would that make it less boring?"

Roman thought it over. "Maybe."

"Let's try it." Janus shifted Roman in his arms and Roman went along with the motion, resting his head on Janus' shoulder and pressing a kiss to his jaw. Laughing softly, Janus nudged Roman away. "You have to focus, though."

Roman sighed. "How could I focus when this view is so pretty?"

"Flirt," said Janus, booping Roman's nose. He flipped open the page he had been interrupted on. "It gives me wonder great as my content to see you here before me—"

"I already read that bit, slowpoke," Roman laughed.

"Well, we can't all be savants, now can we? Now let me read."

"Mm." Roman nestled into the crook of Janus' neck, his hair lightly tickling his cheek as his eyes idly scanned the page Janus was reading from.

Shifting the arm he held around his boyfriend, Janus let his fingers run up and down Roman's forearm along with the even beat of each verse. "O my soul's joy, if after every tempest come such calmness..."

Even though the material hadn't changed, Roman found that from Janus' lips, even the dullest verse was captivating as ever.

—

if you enjoy my writing, please reblog it!

Hello, good morning! How about some familial Loceit with the word "cereal"? ~M

warnings: joking mention of hell & homosexuality being a sin, description of gross (but edible) food

—

"You're disgusting."

Logan threw a cheerio at his brother, then grabbed the sugar. "What is it now?"

"I need to explain?" Janus gestured to Logan's breakfast. "This is what you're going to hell for."

"Falsehood. I'm going to hell for procrastination, homosexuality and my BBC Sherlock phase," Logan deadpanned. "You, on the other hand—" He poured strawberry milk into his bowl. "Hawaiian pizza."

"Hawaiian pizza is not that bad!"

"It has pineapple on it."

"And your cereal has Nutella in it; how are we even related?"

"We're not."

"Shut up, I know. Oh, Christ, don't put it in the microwave—"

"What does it matter to you? Let me eat my perfectly average breakfast in peace." Logan set the dial, standing on his toes to reach.

"Unfortunately, as your older brother, it's my job to save you from eternal damnation." Janus took a sip from the milk jug. Logan made a face and he rolled his eyes. "If nothing else will work, now you have a chance at being infected with good taste."

"If drinking milk in this house will make me eat pickles directly from the jar, I will gladly abstain from it."

"I have no idea what you're talking about." Janus peered at the microwave. "What is in there?"

"Cheerios, Lucky Charms, Rice Krispies, sugar, butter, Nutella, strawberry milk, regular milk, germs, if that—" Logan gestured at the milk jug. "—is a habit of yours, miniature marshmallows and vanilla syrup."

Janus gagged. "You're going to die of a sugar rush."

Logan raised an eyebrow, retrieving his breakfast from the microwave, carefully mixing it and eating a spoonful. "Then I'll see you in hell." With a small wave, he left for his room, shutting the door with his elbow.

Janus shook his head, then went to fix himself some coffee. He was positive he wouldn't survive today uncaffeinated.

cat and prinxiety

Roman wasn't a cat person.

If he was fully honest, they freaked him out a little. Just sat and stared from far away and when he cautiously got closer, they ran off. They hissed and clawed at him for no reason and were so freakishly quiet that Roman never saw them coming and besides, they made his nose itch.

But him not being a cat person didn't mean he couldn't date one. Virgil almost seemed part cat too, really—he wasn't exactly talkative, shied away from affection and left remarks with a bite that Roman found obnoxious until he fell head over heels for them. Winning Virgil over had taken patience and more chill than Roman liked to exercise, but it was worth it—every second Roman spent in Virgil's arms paid back the months of pining tenfold.

And Roman had convinced Virgil; how much harder could his cat be?

—

Virgil took Roman's jacket, flipping the hallway light switch. Curiously, Roman glanced around, his eyes catching on a pile of letters and postcards that Virgil quickly stood in front of, on a beaten-up plastic cat carrier that sat in the corner like a war relic, on—finally—the massive gray and black wad of fur on the couch that was glaring at him through glowing yellow eyes.

Roman took a step back.

He wasn't scared—he was very appropriately cautious about the murderous backpack-sized dust hare that his boyfriend was now lifting off its perch. The cat sat calmly in Virgil's arms, its tail slowly swinging, unblinking, unmoving, as Virgil pressed a gentle kiss to its head. Roman looked it in the eyes and wondered if cats could smell fear.

"Salem," Virgil said in the softest voice Roman had ever heard leaving his mouth, "say hello to Roman."

Still staring daggers at Roman, Salem slowly blinked. Roman gave the cat, then Virgil, a tense smile. Virgil raised an eyebrow at him.

Roman stepped closer, his eyes fixed on the cat, slowly stretching out his hand, letting it sniff his finger first. Salem ignored Roman's peace offering, still sat still as a fuzzy gargoyle. Hesitantly, Roman brushed over his head—Salem pulled away and Roman jerked back as if he had been struck by lightning.

Virgil snorted, then burst out laughing—Salem yowled at him and he let the cat fall to the ground (it landed on its feet, gave Roman a venomous glare and sped off into the kitchen). "Sorry—" He shook his head, miserably failing to suppress laughter as Roman glared at him. "I just, I thought you didn't want to come over because you hated me or something—you could have told me you're scared of Salem!"

"You're rude," Roman complained. His cheeks were burning—he made a point of ignoring Virgil's amused glance.

"Mm." Virgil offered him a hand. Their fingers interlaced, and he gave Roman's hand a small squeeze. "I'll help you win him over; Salem can be kinda grumpy but he'll come around." He kissed Roman's temple. "Don't worry."

"Rich coming from you," Roman teased, stealing a kiss back from Virgil's lips. He sighed. "Fine, I'll give the little demon a chance. Only because I love you so much."

"Thanks." Virgil gave Roman a shy smile, as if he couldn't help himself. "Love you too."

—

"Virgil?" Roman called from the living room, his voice shaky and pitched. Virgil set his bowl aside, rushing out of the kitchen to find his boyfriend frozen with nerves, his hands hovering over Salem as he climbed onto Roman's lap.

Virgil grinned. "You good?" Roman made a frantic, wide-eyed gesture, and Virgil laughed. "He likes you!"

Salem curled into a cat donut on Roman's legs, softly kneading his thigh. Hesitantly, Roman brushed a finger over his head, then pulled his hand away. He glanced back at Virgil.

"Scratch behind his ears." Roman did, and Salem purred, leaning into his hand. Virgil chuckled as Roman continued carefully, as if the cat would shatter under his fingertips if he was too harsh. He gave Virgil an anxious look.

Virgil kissed his forehead. "You're doing great."

Roman grinned. "Aren't I always?" Salem dug a claw into his leg and he yelped.

Virgil snorted, petting Salem's head. "Of course you are."

With another kiss, Virgil left to continue making popcorn—but he had no doubt Roman and Salem would be fine. After all, he knew they would come around.

people stopped making their own sides???? i've been amassing a side army over here for the past two years (i quite literally have 30 sides rn) and its such a good way to deal with your issues, they've also because my main hyperfixation so i'm almost always thinking about them

Ppl should start making their own sides again

Absent Ash

Summary: “Janus has been carrying the weight of losing his four beloved partners in battle on his shoulders for 6 long years. The road to recovery has been rough, and even now he still can’t quite forgive himself for not being able to save them from death. But he’s learning to move on with the help of a new friend, Emile. 

He’d been so close to finally letting it all go, you know. Which is why it only seemed to feel all the more deserved when it all went wrong.”

Word Count: 4.1k

Primary Content Warnings(additional info under the cut*): past-DLAMP relationship, hurt/no comfort, unresolved/open ending, (assumed) multiple Major Character Deaths, traumatic experience involving the loss of loved ones. PTSD, Emotional Trauma, Survivors Guilt, and Lifelong Disabilities gained as a result of the traumatic loss, Descriptive scene following the events of a self-destructive mental shutdown triggered by related circumstances.

( However, I have added Emile in to act as a buffer to most of these, so while they are very much present parts in the fic, they are almost all accompanied  side by side with Emile’s intervention)

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