So it has been a while. There are so many social media apps, and I am honestly barely able to keep up with one.

Any ways on with the update. I handed in my notice last Monday, and starting next week, I will be heading out into the 🌎 world 🌎 for work again. My new job is dispatch for repair techs. I will be physically located in a small office over on Clapperton Ave. It is exciting and nerve-racking as I haven't been physically working with people in over 2 1/2 years. The people I have met in the office seem really nice.

It is a quiet morning.

Mom come and picked me up . I am now sitting with mom and Dave waiting for Denny to wake for us to have a visit. Kris is not here.

I find myself struggling with what to say? what I can do? How to support my relatives?

My Uncle pointed out how despite limited contact my aunt loves my little girls' smile.

After almost 2 hours as we were about to leave she woke up. Denny is tired, weak and in pain. I found it hard to see my proud Aunt in that state. She asked about the girls, I said next time I would call and if she was up for it we would bring them up.

It is never easy seeing anyone let alone family in that state. I don't want my children to have memories of her like she was today.

Today I made a conscious effort to find/make arrangements for child care and made my way up to the local hospice only to be shutdown at the door by my cousin. My Aunt I. His defense was sleeping but again the effort and emotional barriers it took to do this.

Only to be told in no uncertain terms that I "should have called" when no one had the courtesy to offer contact info. And to "come back after 4pm" ... again the effort it took to get here

I am sitting on a bench outside the hospice crying as I type this because I have an hour to wait for the next bus to take me back to my side of town (about 45 minutes and multiple buses)

Someone from my church was going in to see one of their relatives and stopped to pray for me; that is more respect and courtesy than I got from my own cousin!

I don't know, if I will be able to make it up again, let alone before she passes and it breaks my heart.

We may not have been close but she is still my Aunt.

Recently, I have started a bible study called "Boundaries"; I also started Genesis. Both are talking about risk and change. This weekend at @kamloopsalliancechurch We are going through #James and we discussed risk.

Faith without action is useless. Your faith should be known by your actions. Faith should not grow stagnant but should be constantly growing and for faith to grow involves taking risk.

Are you stagnant in your beliefs and faith?

What risks are you willing to take? Are you taking to grow in your beliefs and faith?

So I am not going to name the organization or anyone involved but I need to vent:

This peticular organization is for children all the way through graduation. As I had good memories of said organity zation when I was in my youth and dreamed of following my children through this organizations program.

My daughter turned of age and I enrolled her and signed up as a volunteer to leader the group. The first year despite working with a fellow volunteer that was somewhat power hungry that used the exact quote "My way or the highway". I resigned to being only allowed to choose and plan crafts for the meetings.

Now year two was at the start of covid and volunteer from year one decided that being part of the organization was a bubble too much for her and her daughter. So year 2 starts with recruiting which surprisingly we had 3 volunteers. The organization breaks different ages into different categories and this would be A (my daughter)'s last year in the first bracet so I was preparing to teach and prepare the new mom's for the next year. Now half way through I guess they decided that they didn't need me any more to the point that I was told I was no longer welcomed at meetings. It was so bad that I couldn't even follow them on walks through PUBLIC parks.

I was given no reason for this besides that someone had complained, about what I have no idea. Wasn't given an option of finding out or facing my accuser(s).

Year 3 was wonderful!! I was in a group with 3 amazing ladies, who were friendly and welcoming. We had a blast and the girls had so much fun. We did plenty of community activities and even a couple day camps.

This brings us to current and without even being able to attend a single meeting as the volunteers from year 2 are now in the same age catagory as A again and again I have a complaint against me. At this point the only communication I had with the Volunteer inquestion was via facebook messenger - me asking how I could help? if there was anything they needed me to do? what they would like me to do to help out?

This time the district commisioner contacted me stating that there was a complaint and that it was the same volunteer from the previous year and that I was to go no contact with them. They sited personality conflict. I did try to do as asked but as there was some inquiries I needed to make as a PARENT, not as a volunteer. Low and behold I get scolded for breaking radio silence. I then sent an email to the commissioner to explain the change in situation. Which she took offense and stated that the wording I used in the PRIVATE email was against code of conduct.

I defended myself again in email.

District commissioner reported me to PROVINCIAL and I am now waiting a zoom meeting to review the incident.

Will update after Zoom with Provincial. Although I don't think I will be continuing volunteering with said organization.

Today our angel would be a teenager. This is her 9th birthday in heaven Happy heavenly Birthday Janice We love ❤️ and miss you. #birthdaygirl #heavenlybirthday #angel #angeldaughter❤️ #angeldaughter👼 #daughterinheaven👼 #daughterinheaven (at North Kamloops, British Columbia) https://www.instagram.com/p/CiiAUkpLXWb/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=

at North Kamloops, British Columbia https://www.instagram.com/p/CiVe3vTJhQh/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=

Today is a day to mark your calendars the longest reigning monarch has passed away https://www.instagram.com/p/CiQUGxWJALO/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=

#firstdayofschool #grade3 Abbygail ready for her first day of school at Bert Edwards Grade 3 in Ms. Ernst (at North Kamloops, British Columbia) https://www.instagram.com/p/CiNff0KLQyg/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=

Finished #1corinthians just in time to start #2corinthians at the start of #September #1corinthians13 @tyndalebibles @theinspirebible (at North Kamloops, British Columbia) https://www.instagram.com/p/CiA8nKgPKyj/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=

Completed #1corinthians on schedule. #newmonth = #newbiblebook #september = #2corinthians #newtestament @kamloopsalliance @tyndalebibles @theinspirebible (at North Kamloops, British Columbia) https://www.instagram.com/p/Ch85-MAOo2J/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=

Last night we came home from church to find a bird in our house. Kevin was able to help it find its way outside this am. #nature #birds_illife #spiritualmeaning #luck (at North Kamloops, British Columbia) https://www.instagram.com/p/ChzvwfPrS1T/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=

Thank you, @salvationarmycanada #backpackprogram #salvationarmypartner for helping us get #newshoes for #backtoschool @sportchek #backtoschoolshopping (at North Kamloops, British Columbia) https://www.instagram.com/p/ChyFDGkv_-8/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=

"SHE IS CLOTHED WITH strength and SHE LAUGHS WITHOUT FEAR OF THE FUTURE-WHEN SHE SPEAKS HER WORDS ARE WISE, AND SHE GIVES instructions WITH kindness PROVERBS 31:25-26- (88) #proverbs to live by #proverb31v25 #proverb31v26 (at North Kamloops, British Columbia) https://www.instagram.com/p/ChxKUC7rnCd/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=

Madeline is interested in and wanting to be her bible. The Beginner's Bible: Timeless Children's Stories https://a.co/d/2QIjEyf (at North Kamloops, British Columbia) https://www.instagram.com/p/Chve_xwvYOG/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=

at North Kamloops, British Columbia https://www.instagram.com/p/Chulj-VLRbL/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=

Life very rarely goes as we plan. When we end up on the side of the road we need to look up to the sky and ask for help. God is always with us and all we need to n do is ask.

I am in the hospital with bout #3 of #diabetes #ketoneacidosis in 28 years. It is not fun and it knocks me on my ass but so far I have stayed on the top soil, a little worse for wear.

Emotions running high, fear of going home to the stresses atat put me in to acidosis. Mostly earthly concerns #money , threat of #eviction, how to pay for #medication.

As I wait for the #central-line a day #intravenous to come out before I can go home.