No trans women aren’t gender oppressors. No they don’t have male privilege. Yes transmisogyny is real. Yes no one is immune from perpetuating it. Can we get to the stuff I was actually saying now

Thank you @cayde6feetunder , precisely. Trans people can absolutely be transmisogynistic, transandrophobic, exorsexist and more. We should acknowledge and work against that while also understanding that it is lateral violence and not the same as the gendered oppression we face from cis folks.

Trans women do not oppress you.

Correct :) I also don’t oppress trans women by being transmasculine. Hope this helps!

It’s so fascinating how many people will hear “transmascs don’t oppress transfems” or even just “transmascs are marginalized for their gender” and instantly jump to “oh so you think trans women are the oppressors?????” Will you just for one moment sit with me and consider the idea that no trans people have gendered privilege over each other

Trans women do not oppress you.

Correct :) I also don’t oppress trans women by being transmasculine. Hope this helps!

As a trans guy I appreciate your blog. I just hope you know when some of us say "I hate cis people" it's after years of being harassed and denied support, as well as the typical transandrophobia of being treated like either hysterical girls or evil men out to manipulate. Some of us just want distance from cis people.

I do hope with the growing awareness of transandrophobia that those boundaries won't be as necessary. So thanks for everything.

I get you, I’ve said the same thing after being burned by cis folks again and again. But I do think there’s a line between saying an offhanded “ugh I hate cis people” and genuinely hating and mistreating them due to assuming they’re all bigoted, the latter of which I take larger issue with. I personally surround myself almost exclusively with other trans folks since I’m more comfortable in my gender expression around them, but if I slipped and made an “I hate cis people” joke within earshot of a cis friend who said it made them uncomfortable? I would simply not say that around them. I understand not wanting to be around cis folks, but I also hope for a world where we can in fact feel comfortable with them, and I try to work towards that instead of rejecting them outright.

Trans women do not oppress you.

Correct :) I also don’t oppress trans women by being transmasculine. Hope this helps!

Also before any of the losers from my other men’s positivity post say anything: yes, maleness is in fact an intersection as is whiteness & literally every other conceivable identity. Go ask Kimberlé Crenshaw <3

Men please DO interact!! I’m just some non-binary lesbian but I want my blog to be a safe space where you won’t be treated poorly for your identity. It’s not your responsibility to self-flagellate or otherwise hate yourself for the crime of being born as or becoming* a man. Gendered expectations are sexist; you have no obligation to be strong, to sacrifice yourself to protect others, to show no emotion, or any other of the standards people may try to force on you.

Of course everyone should use their privilege to uplift those less privileged than them, but people shouldn’t assume you’re exclusively privileged due to your gender or ignore the way it intersects with other identities of yours. I love you disabled men, men of color, trans men, intersex men, queer men, and everyone else. I will include you in my feminism always and forever. Please surround yourselves with people who care about you.

Men please DO interact!! I’m just some non-binary lesbian but I want my blog to be a safe space where you won’t be treated poorly for your identity. It’s not your responsibility to self-flagellate or otherwise hate yourself for the crime of being born as or becoming* a man. Gendered expectations are sexist; you have no obligation to be strong, to sacrifice yourself to protect others, to show no emotion, or any other of the standards people may try to force on you.

Of course everyone should use their privilege to uplift those less privileged than them, but people shouldn’t assume you’re exclusively privileged due to your gender or ignore the way it intersects with other identities of yours. I love you disabled men, men of color, trans men, intersex men, queer men, and everyone else. I will include you in my feminism always and forever. Please surround yourselves with people who care about you.

People hate-reblogging this up in arms about how Evil men are, thanks for giving me more notes :) I want all men ever to see this & understand they shouldn’t hate themselves for being born. Men, I love you!!!

To any trans man who needs to hear this: When they say they “hate all men” or want to “kill all men,” you don’t have to just accept that. It’s okay to feel hurt, it’s okay to feel unsafe. It’s okay to recognize that they are either othering your manhood or demonizing you for it, and to call them out for it if you’re in a position to. If they have trauma around men, they can work on that in private instead of expressing harmful sentiments around their marginalized male friends. You deserve love and safety. I love you and I hope I can help you feel safe.

Tags by @emiel2d

To any trans man who needs to hear this: When they say they “hate all men” or want to “kill all men,” you don’t have to just accept that. It’s okay to feel hurt, it’s okay to feel unsafe. It’s okay to recognize that they are either othering your manhood or demonizing you for it, and to call them out for it if you’re in a position to. If they have trauma around men, they can work on that in private instead of expressing harmful sentiments around their marginalized male friends. You deserve love and safety. I love you and I hope I can help you feel safe.

Yeah, no. Do not use my post for this shit. I’m sorry I wasn’t clear enough the first time, this blog doesn’t think it’s acceptable to hate and mistreat people for any immutable characteristic, period. Yeah, I’m uncomfortable around cis men sometimes and have been hurt by them—that’s something to work through, not become a radfem about.

Calling for the death of all men includes men who you or other people who say it may have privilege over, like abled White women calling for the death of disabled Black men. Yes, this holds for hating all cis people. Yes, this holds for hating all white people. I’m guilty of saying all of this too. But it’s something I’m working through, and other people should as well. We will never have a world where men and White people don’t exist; we should instead craft a world where they no longer have power over us.

To any trans man who needs to hear this: When they say they “hate all men” or want to “kill all men,” you don’t have to just accept that. It’s okay to feel hurt, it’s okay to feel unsafe. It’s okay to recognize that they are either othering your manhood or demonizing you for it, and to call them out for it if you’re in a position to. If they have trauma around men, they can work on that in private instead of expressing harmful sentiments around their marginalized male friends. You deserve love and safety. I love you and I hope I can help you feel safe.

thank you for the work you do. it makes me feel less alone.

I don’t think you realize how much this means to me :( Being transmasc has made it easy to feel so invisible and deeply, deeply alone, especially before finding transandrophobia conversations. Even when I started using the term, I could see that certain trans people hated my guts for it. It was isolating and I felt like a Bad Transmasc. All I needed was to be seen and understood, I just wanted someone to hear me for once. As a result, it’s become my greatest passion to provide that environment for trans men and mascs. I want to give them a space they can feel comfortable, be taken seriously, and feel a sense of community. Thanks to people like you and those in my irl spaces, I feel like I’m finally doing it!

its not set up yet so no username to share for now but honestly, all the fantastic work u and other transandrophobia fighters have been doing has encouraged me to make a blog like urs and others!!

thanks for being so empowering and cool :3

-cupid anon

Thank you :D Congrats on your blog, please lmk when it’s up & running!

Every time I see the TME discourses I think about the time someone (SARCASTICALLY) suggested that we start using TAA and TAE to point out it does in fact go both ways. Obviously not, it's more individual than that but I think it's important for everyone to acknowledge where they don't experience a specific oppression. Not as a privilege thing!!! but as a knowing where we stand. (Examples: public & intense violence; pregnancy as a means of detransition) I hope this makes sense?

I get that, my problem with the TME/TMA binary has never been identifying which groups are the most affected by specific forms of oppression. My problem is the idea that anyone is “exempt” from any oppressive system. I don’t mind the term TMA itself, though I wish it was more like “transmisogyny targeted” considering many people are in fact affected by transmisogyny just like any other system. For example I would in fact be willing to use something like TAA/TAT to describe the groups most affected by transandrophobia (including transmascs, intersex folks perceived as transmasc, & masc lesbians) but I wouldn’t even use TAE as a joke personally.

As a trans man who was 'raised' in his early transition by a bunch of tirf-y trans women (to the point where their attitudes towards trans men contributed to me going off T), I'm really glad that people are having discussions about this shit. Because they weren't in 2012 and I don't want other trans mascs to go through that.

I’m so sorry to hear that, it’s really easy to internalize anti-transmasc sentiments considering how pervasive and unchallenged they are. I’ve been getting many kind messages from transmascs in my inbox thanking me for my advocacy work, so I think these conversations are very much having an impact!

The thing that sucks the most about this whole wave of anti-transmasculinity is that, well, obviously how it hurts and isolates trans men (which hurts me a lot despite not being a trans man because I still resonate with them... to the point where I used to identify as one before finding out I'm nonbinary in a way beyond the man woman binary), but the second thing that hurts the most to me personally has to do with how cyclical this all is. Anti-transmasculinity in queer spaces has never been a new thing but this wave of it is so similar to the previous exclusionary waves targeted towards asexuals and bisexuals which...

I'm both, and it's a special kind of hurt to know for certain that people only stopped hurting you because they got BORED and found a new target. People never stopped hating asexuals and bisexuals, not really, it just became unfasionable to do so openly, and they only make that more and more clear the more times they regurgitate exclusionist talking points, but towards different members of the community this time.

So yeah, I completly stand by staying angry after all of this blows over unless real fucking change in this community happens. I certainly still am. I'll always support you guys.

Thank you </3 Yeah, it’s the same pattern we’ve seen for years just with another easy target. Accusing queer groups of being too privileged to take seriously or treat well has never caused anything but problems. I hope we identify a way to disrupt this pattern more permanently. I think putting a specific name to the phenomenon would help, if anyone knows of or thinks of one please let me know.

I used to be in the transandrophobia Discord server, and I want to thank you for creating such a positive and accepting culture surrounding transmasculinity, both in the server and here on Tumblr. You're awesome :)

Aw thank you :D Thanks for checking us out & I appreciate you :)

the idea that restrooms, locker rooms, etc need to be single-sex spaces in order for women to be safe is patriarchy's way of signalling to men & boys that society doesn't expect them to behave themselves around women. it is directly antifeminist. it would be antifeminist even if trans people did not exist. a feminist society would demand that women should be safe in all spaces even when there are men there.