#zelda's massive balls
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This is a little poster I made for a discord server that holds a special place in my heart, Protagomania! It’s heavily underrated, and I recommend you check it out! I’ll be posting the link in a second!
#dragon ball#jojo’s bizarre adventure#kung fu panda#the legend of zelda#world of warcraft#multiverse#donkey kong#gravity falls#my art#massive crossover#crossover art
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Ganondorf x Hylian!reader
Just a little blurb I had to get out of my brain. Requests for Ganondorf/other Zelda characters are open!
He couldn’t help but marvel at you.
For as much as he hated hylians, even he must admit that some of them possessed admirable qualities—tenacity, an indomitable ability to survive anything, and a fiery courage that sometimes bordered on foolishness. You were an excellent example of a Hylian in this sense.
Now, as he watched you sitting near the crystal clear waters of the oasis, he could recall how you had glared up at him when he had first met you. Your teeth had been bared, your hands balled into fists at your sides as you had no doubt prepared yourself to fight to the death. But any intentions he had had of killing you quickly dissipated when he saw that bright fire in your eyes, and he could remember laying his sword down at your feet and kneeling before you…though even while kneeling he was far larger than you, a mountain in comparison.
You had been confused. You had considered running, preserving your life and keeping your head attached to your shoulders. You had even thought about wrapping both hands around the sword’s grip and doing your best to haul the massive weapon up into the air to protect yourself with. But when you had seen the way the Gerudo king had lowered himself, you had begun to consider him in a new, less threatening light, and you had taken a step back while the tension in the air shifted to something different.
From that moment on, he wanted only to be near you. And now, after many months of careful, determined courtship, he finally felt that you were his.
When he shifted his weight and leaned towards you, he was pleased to find that you mirrored him. Your shoulder brushed against his chest as you relaxed with a hydromelon slice clutched in your hand, the juice running down your wrist in a way that made him wrinkle his nose. He had always hated the sticky feeling of food on his skin. As you tilted your head up and saw the look of disgust on his face, you simply laughed and offered him the hydromelon, licking the juice off yourself when he took it.
“Oh, mighty king of the Gerudo…” you teased. “So bothered by the smallest things.”
“You are quite small, and you don’t bother me in the least.” He quipped, taking a large bite.
You could feel warmth in your cheeks as you blushed. “That’s good, then. I wouldn’t want to interrupt your day, by any means.”
“On the contrary…” he tossed the melon rind towards the sand seals relaxing nearby and put both hands on your hips, hoisting you into his lap. “You are a most welcome and constant distraction.”
He was so big and so warm, his hands seeming to engulf you as he held you there. How you ended up with the king of the Gerudo remained a mystery to you, but being with Ganondorf felt as natural as breathing, and the thought of being away from his hot skin and deep voice for even a day was troubling to you now. It had been months since you had last seen your homeland of Hyrule, and while at times you missed the lush, green fields, this endless desert had become your home, as had the man who lorded over it.
“You’re thinking of it again,” he remarked almost bitterly.
“Hmm?” You zoned back in to find him studying your face, golden eyes watching you intently.
“Hyrule.”
You laid a palm flat against his chest and looked down at it. “It’s hard not to think of it, at times.”
He was silent for a long moment, and at first, you were afraid you had upset him. But when your eyes drifted back up to his, you saw that they were serious and bright, practically sparkling with what you knew was passion.
“One day, we will both go there.” He said.
“I would like that,” you smiled.
“One day…Hyrule will be yours.”
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I completely understand if you don’t feel comfortable answering this, but my mind is spiraling out of control and you’re the only person I know with the level of knowledge to where I can feel comfortable asking this without getting some form of “bla bla we live in a safe state don’t worry.”
I’m sincerely wondering if I need to be making plans to leave the country in the event of November bringing the most horrible of outcomes despite our best efforts (and yes I’m planning to vote blue in everything I can); as a AFAB in CA?
I know about project 2025. I’m terrified. Forgive my pop culture reference, but I feel like a version of Princess Zelda staring down a barrel of possible doom while everyone around me is like “nah that future you literally had a nightmare about where they made it illegal for a woman to have a bank account without a guy co-signing it and took the money from everyone who didn’t comply by a certain date isn’t even a possibility!”
I’m just confused about my life and am trying to take it day by day, and exercising every right while I still have it to prevent this outcome, but it feels weird making plans and retirement accounts and just general Setting Up Adult Life And Future Things™️……while wondering if I even have a future in this place at all and I’m just making it harder to escape if need be.
I’m sorry I’m rambling, and I guess I don’t know what I’m asking since no one has a crystal ball.
But I guess, it’s stuff like how much can the feds effect state’s policies? Is it possible for them to immediately block international travel for all women practically upon inauguration? How much time would I even have to gtfo if the worst begins?
Bc honestly this whole thing feels like the lead in to a very nasty chapter of a history book, and even though I have hope we’ll have another blue tsunami, it can be hard to try and figure things out when it feels like there’s barely any historical precedent for any of it.
Welp. Okay. First of all, I am giving you a comforting hug, I am walking with you to your favorite coffee shop, I am paying for your favorite beverage and also a baked goodie of your choice, and we are sitting down in a corner where we can talk honestly. So that's where I want you to imagine us having this conversation.
To start with, yes, I completely understand this feeling of utter, paralyzing doom, where I am trying to go about my daily life and make plans for my career and carry out daily tasks and Be Responsible while there's still just this total void beyond the end of the year, the utter impossibility of knowing if we will have dodged an absolutely massive bullet and finally be safe (since if Trump loses again he is 100% going to jail in the next four years) or, well. You know. That is a very hard way to live, when you're wondering if anything is going to matter and you can't see beyond that black cloud of fear on the horizon. It sucks you down and tells you that nothing is worth doing now in case it just gets so much worse. I am not going to tell you not to feel that. We all do. We are all scared. That in and of itself is a perfectly normal way to feel.
However, there are things you can do both now and if (I repeat, if) God absolutely forbid, the worst was to happen (again). First of all, we have already lived through a Trump presidency once. It was terrible and scary and awful and demoralizing as fuck, but we can do it again if we absolutely Goddamn fucking have to (once, again, God forbid). Second, you are currently about as safe as you could be in California. Newsom has proven himself to be smart, tough, able to run rings around Republicans, and unwilling to comply with their stupid performative-cruelty directives. He's not a saint or a magician, but you don't need that; you need a shrewd politician able to fight back, and he has proven himself willing and capable of doing that. So as long as he is governor, you're going to be more safe than not, and I'd also like to ask all the shrieking Online Leftists if, should the shit go down, they would rather live in a state with a Democratic governor who will fight Trump 2.0 every step of the way, or a Republican governor who will just roll over and obey. (But that would destroy their BOTH PARTIES ARE THE SAME talking point, so you know.)
Next of all, even if the Republicans are doing their best impression, America in 2024 isn't Germany in 1934. There are different tools, different ways to fight back, and different awarenesses/social media/visibility factors. I also need everyone to remember that just as Biden can't just sign an executive order and fix everything everywhere, Trump can't just sign an executive order and fuck everything everywhere, just like that with no more discussion ever. He tried that last time, it generally didn't work, and trust me, at least this time nobody is sleeping on the danger he poses. His candidacy in 2016 was dismissed as a long-shot joke that nobody took seriously until it was too late, and for better or worse, people aren't doing that this time. He will be sued instantly, incredibly, and repeatedly with everything his band of wannabe fascists try, and since we have had four years of Biden fixing the courts from where Trump trashed them, that does mean something. There is no scenario where even if he does issue some outrageous order against women, LGBTQ+ people, immigrants, etc (which to be clear, I'm sure he would try) it would just be carried out completely, immediately, and with no feasible way to stop it. Evil is evil, but it is also stupid, clueless, determined to hurt people just for the hell of it without any regard for what is possible or which will be allowed, and there's a lot more grey area in there than just "Trump says something terrible and it's instantly done, the end."
Once again, I'm not going to say that the worst-case scenario is not possible, but I don't think it's likely, and even if that does happen, there are ways for us to survive and fight back (again). Nobody wants it and it should not have to be asked of us due to the utter collapse of the social, civic, political, and intellectual fabric of this country thanks to the TrumpCult, but once again... these people are so loud and dangerous and cruel and stupid because they are in the minority. Etc. etc. polls are garbage, but we did just have an interesting piece of empirical data from the Iowa caucuses. Trump -- in one of the whitest, most rural, most conservative, most religious, most Trump-loving states in the country -- struggled to break 50%. Almost half of a rabid Republican fully-Trumpized electorate, among the diehards sufficiently motivated to get out and caucus in extreme freezing weather, voted for someone else (Haley and DeSantis took about 20% apiece). Now, no, we don't know how that will translate to the general election, and if registered Republicans will flock back to the nominee even if it's Trump, but as almost half of Haley voters said they would vote for Biden if it was a Biden-Trump matchup in the general, there is some sense that Trump is an aberration to their otherwise ironclad party loyalty. Now, Republicans are the fucking worst and nobody should be relying on them to save us; we still need to get out and vote for Democrats with all our might. But Trump is no longer barn-burningly popular even in core Trump heartland, and it'll be interesting to see how things go in future primaries.
My point is: I know the feeling that evil is awful and unstoppable and all-powerful, and will crush our lives and our futures no matter what we do to resist it. I really, really do. But Trump is a terrible candidate, he's running literally only to keep himself out of a long, long prison sentence, and if he had crushed the Iowa caucuses regardless, we might be having a different conversation. However, we need to remember that it is possible, again (God forbid) in the worst scenario, to resist, to live, and to win. Everyone who is motivated to work for a better world will still be here. Everyone who can help you and all of us will still be here. And there are more of us than there are of them. Yes, I do understand the feeling that we need to have contingency plans in place, I do absolutely know that it could get very bad, and all that (as you say, nobody has a crystal ball). But for now, I want you to take a deep breath, try to take this day by day, and remember that this is not a crushing and inevitable future that will sweep over you and destroy you without you (or any other person of good will) having a say in the matter. You still have agency, you still have the ability to protect yourself, and you still have others who will protect you in turn. You're not alone. The bad guys want you to think that, because when you're isolated and terrorized, you're easier to pick off and/or recruit into their cult. But you're not.
In conclusion: "What are we holding onto, Sam?"
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Aspects of a Party
“I hate these things.” Twilight moaned, tugging self-consciously at his surcoat. “All fancy people in fancy clothes using fancy words and looking down at you.” he grimaced and stole another breadstick from the nearby table.
Wild chuckled as he adjusted the ties on his own outfit. When they had arrived in Castle Town a day ago, Twilight had promised them all a warm, relaxing stay with his friends from the resistance in a nearby bar. Unfortunately he had failed to realise that it was the first day of Solstice, and that would mean that most people already had plans that they had to attend.
Namely, Queen Zelda had plans. For a massive Solstice ball. And she fully expected the Hero of Twilight to attend.
Wild had never actually seen Twilight pray for a portal before, but it had certainly been an entertaining sight.
Read the rest on AO3!
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Welcome!
Hi! Thanks for stopping by. My name is Navi, and I write some Zelink and do a lot of betaing. If you want to keep up with my work, you can follow me here or on Ao3.
Otherwise, here's a master list of my favorite works:
The Midnight Revelry. (Ch 11/11) A pre!Calamity Age of Calamity or Breath of the Wild Zelink fic. It's got masquerade balls and secret letters <3
Never Been Kissed: A Skyward Sword Zelink story.
Hyrule's First Couples Therapy: a post!totk therapy fic.
What We Thought: A pre!calamity Zelda steals some of Impa’s Sheikah garments to sneak from the castle. What will happen when her appointed knight sees a dark figure stealing away from his princess’s study?
And some of my favorite pieces to beta. Please give the authors all the love:
Long Series:
A Lullaby for a Princess by @wouldyoustilllovemeifiwasawyrm/ (Ch. 26/43) I'm absolutely obsessed with this fic. Link and Zelda marry post!TotK after rapidly getting pregnant. The emotions through this piece are intense, and I absolutely cannot wait to see how it ends up. (This series now also has a bunch of canon Linktober one-shots. Pay close attention to Wild Spirit, Wandering Spirits, Sheep Are Girls, and Brightblooms in the Well)
The Long and Winding Road by @flutefemme. (8/14) A Twilight Princess AU where Zelda is running from her mob boss ex Ganon and finds a home with Link and his son.
Pride and Prejudice by @shameless-fujoshi. (Ch 23/28) Firefighter!Link and Professor!Zelda meet and they don't quite hit it off at first. Can they reconcile their differences?
The Cage by @shameless-fujoshi. (Ch 32/32) Link is a cage fighter, and Zelda is a it is everything I didn't know I needed in a modern AU. Very weak for Link calling Zelda baby.
A Couple of Trials (73/100) by @kenlair. This massive wonderful series has been going on far longer than I even knew Zelink existed, but its a really fascinating telling of what Zelda and Link's life could have realistically looked like post!BotW. The worldbuilding elements are second to none.
One Shots/Short Series:
famous prophets (stars) by @korokposting. Pre!Calamity first kiss. The trans!Link characterization gives me such life.
A Flower Adorned Goddess by @oatmilkdrnkr. Pre!Calamity sweetness and fluff and absolutely adoring Link.
rubies, spicy peppers, and hylian shrooms by @angelicgarnet. Zelda working through her feelings about menstruation with a sprinkle of zelink goodness.
The Couple of Gracemas by @kenlair. It's a pre!Calamity Christmas special yall! Cute sweet moments between a teenaged couple with far too much on their shoulder, which a healthy sprinkle of angst.
silent princess by @korokposting. TotK -- Link's search for Zelda, and the flower that guided him. this piece is so lovely and sweet
you're too far away by @korokposting. Post!OoT, Link doesn't return to his childhood. A Shink story with lots of Sheik gender feels that are just...so phenomenal. Its breathtaking.
if i've lost you for good by @korokposting. Post!TotK, Link and Zelda confront the trauma of being chosen by Hylia. Grab the tissues and settle in. (And then probably read some of these kid fics after, bc it will emotionally destroy you.) Some of the finest writing on depression and mental health issues I've seen.
It Only Takes a Second by @shameless-fujoshi. Baby Zelly locks herself in the bath house while Link is on parent duty.
Swords and Naps by @shameless-fujoshi. It's time for baby Zelly to take a nap -- but not if she has anything to say about it! This adorable fic had me rolling.
Before Our Eyes by @shameless-fujoshi. This slice-of-life fic is a prime example of what she does best as Link coddles baby Zelly during a thunderstorm.
anti-curse by @korokposting. Link and Zelda's first kiss post!Calamity. I love first kiss fics and this one felt so tender, vulnerable and real. I've reread it so many times.
Entanglement by @shameless-fujoshi. Young parents Zelda and Link leave for Lurelin Village for their first vacation since they've had their baby. Zelda doesn't handle it well.
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Lorule has been restored! This calls for a massive celebration to commemorate this momentous moment. It's a wonder what this Royal Ball will yield.
#princess hilda#ravio#albw ravio#hildavio#falling in love#requited love#ramance#she fell first he fell harder#royal ball#link#zelda#slight zelink#a link between worlds#loz albw#legend of zelda#zelda fanfiction
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The Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild Trilogy is Amazing
Yes, I said trilogy. It’s amazing we got three games in the span of six years that cover this story. Breath of the Wild, Age of Calamity, and, I know in my heart the final game will be, Tears of the Kingdom are spectacular.
BOTW was breath of fresh air. The adventure from waking up from failure over 100 years to have a second chance at defeating the greatest evil that has plagued the land and infested it like a cancer. Meeting so many fantastic characters of both the present and the ghosts of the past you wanted to avenge was a wonderful experience.
If you didn’t play this game due to gameplay differences, you’ve done yourself a massive disservice. I see this as a Future Trunks situation akin to Dragon Ball. You can’t change what has occurred in Breath of the Wild. That world was ravaged over 100 years, with good people having suffered and died at the hands of the Calamity. That can’t be changed. Despite this, you can save at least one world from that suffering. This story works spectacularly well, pulling at the heart strings due to the bonds you have with these characters. It’s due to those bonds that you celebrate, despite the struggles and the wave of evil crashing down around you, that just this once, everyone lives.
After saving this world, we have the ball in our court. We have one more fight to make sure Ganondorf and his Calamity can’t tear away the freedom we fought for. For me, these games represent three goals: In Breath of the Wild we liberated the present. In Age of Calamity we saved the past. Finally, in Tears of the Kingdom, we shall secure the future.
#Legend of Zelda#Breath of the Wild#Age of Calamity#Tears of the Kingdom#Link#Zelda#Ganondorf#Hyrule#I'm so excited to finish this trilogy off
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Theorycrafting a DLC Expansion for AoC that explains how TotK's setup works on its timeline split (updated)
This idea is still cooking in my brain so I said let's ball and wrote out the plot and story chapters too and made some tweaks to what I'd already written. TotK does not contradict AoC, they can still work together. Here's how I would see that happen.
TotK main story spoilers under the cut
Thanks to TotK, we know that Ganondorf's seal broke because of the Great Calamity of 100 years ago, not BotW's present day story. Which means the Great Calamity of AoC should still weaken his seal like on the main branch of the timeline, however this time we're on a new branch and 106 years later there won't be a hero and princess combo to save the day anymore when Ganondorf wakes up. So you would think that doesn't fit with TotK, right? UNLESS...
... Unless we consider events that are unique to AoC's timeline, as well. First we should establish what we know about AoC's timeline split. We know that Terrako had to have gone back in time pretty far comparatively, because Link didn't yet have the Master Sword and hadn't yet met Zelda and Daruk the ways BotW described they did. The very start of AoC must happen much earlier on than the earliest point we ever see in BotW's memories. Knowing that, it makes sense why things happen so much differently than the history BotW's memories painted. We can assume there were so many more monsters that massive-scale battles the likes of which were unheard of in BotW's history became necessary because Astor and Harbinger Ganon were going around creating more monsters for the purpose of expediting the Calamity's revival. We never hear of Astor in BotW's history, because Harbinger Ganon wasn't around to choose him. So because of these two mucking things around, the Calamity's revival actually happened earlier than it did in BotW's history. This is important information for later.
So we know that because this is a timeline split that occurs just before the events of BotW's 100-year history, the setups of TotK's history still apply. On the main timeline, it took 106 years for Ganondorf to wake up after the Great Calamity weakened his seal. On the split timeline, the Calamity was averted, but the damage was still done, and the battle dragged on longer and had Astor and Harbinger doing things that never happened in BotW's history. Most notable of these is fully reviving this timeline split's Calamity Ganon, which we know was done by Harbinger Ganon absorbing Astor and assumedly merging with the Calamity Ganon that was already present in this timeline. We know they had to become one at some point because when they defeat him, Calamity Ganon is gone and the Calamity is over. So he did in fact fully revive, something he didn't get the chance to do in BotW's history because Zelda stepped up to seal him away for 100 years while he was still a cloud of malice. Because of this major difference, and because of the connection between Calamity Ganon and Ganondorf, I think it's fair to propose that this split timeline's Ganondorf can wake up after a similar timeskip as seen between BotW and TotK. Meaning, we can still do a "6 years later" after AoC's ending for this and it would still make sense. TotK's prologue can still commence as it did on the main timeline.
So how could this work here? We can't send AoC's Zelda back in time because even in this timeline the Light Dragon should still exist. As a matter of fact, on this timeline we'd end up with two Zeldas and two Master Swords. Kinda awkward, huh? Here's how I think we can make that a little less awkward...
Gloom starts seeping out as it did in TotK. Link and Zelda go under the castle to investigate as they did in TotK, BUT this time they have Terrako with them. That will be the key that changes how this goes. Link still gets his Master Sword and his arm messed up, but Terrako is the one to intervene and prevent Zelda from getting yeeted back to the past by her sacred stone. Call it plot magic or triforce magic or whatever you want. Instead he yeets her up to the Great Sky Island while Rauru does the same to Link as in TotK. Upheaval still happens. However this time we can't really have several weeks or months pass from this point to when Link wakes up, yeah? So instead of starting the Great Sky Island chapter as Link, you would start it as Zelda and Terrako as Rauru guides them across the island to find Link, to parallel TotK. Fighting through a Warriors map full of Soldier Constructs with Link as the end goal. He would hold on to the Decayed Master Sword and the Master Sword weapon itself would become unavailable to use in-game for a while. Zelda would gain the Purah Pad as a 4th tier of her Sheikah Slate weapon. This is where we can diverge to make a Warriors-themed story, and this would be the start of Chapter 8 in AoC.
Now, for here, we can mirror the story progress from the early chapters of AoC. The Great Sky Island can be CH8M1, and then we can go to CH8M2 on the surface and use an adjusted map of North Hyrule Field and Castle Town that we see in "All Hyrule, United"; adjusted to account for the changes in TotK like fallen blocks and Lookout Landing, which was created to research the gloom and then repurposed into a base to search for Link and Zelda after they went missing. Link and Zelda evacuate the town and reunite with King Rhoam who is still alive on this split. Also, have King Rauru's ghost accompany them as a new playable character instead of vanishing. Just like in TotK, most of the Sheikah tech has vanished except for the stuff Robbie and Purah are creating, so now Lookout Landing is the new home base on the map screen and title screen instead of the Sheikah Tower.
Next we can do Chapter 9 and have it mirror Chapter 2. There can be four missions in this chapter, each revisiting the Champions and dealing with the sudden changes to their towns. So rather than recruiting them like in CH2, instead we're helping them defend their homes on adjusted maps. After this, we can move to Chapter 10. After the towns are relatively safe, the Champions reconvene at Lookout Landing and try to figure out what's going on. In doing so, Puppet Zelda is sighted heading into the Hyrule Field Chasm. CH10M1 takes place at the Great Abandoned Central Mine, and the now-friendly Yiga help track her down and expose her. Puppet Zelda and Phantom Ganon become a boss here. After this, I would have Mineru make her presence in the Purah Pad known and lead the group to their next objective; the Construct Factory and Spirit Temple. This would be CH10M2 and is how you would recruit Mineru's Construct as a new playable character.
Now it's time for Chapter 11. What I would have happen here is another four missions on brand new maps, each involving the four new dungeons and include the bosses from TotK. Mineru and Rauru lead each of the Champions back to their homes and into these dungeons. The Champions now become the Sages of this era and get a new outfit that includes their Secret Stones and a 4th weapon tier that's their Champion Weapon again but with their Secret Stone symbols superimposed behind them. Revali is a bit iffy here because he's not outright stated to have family ties to Teba and Tulin, but Revali's Gale and Tulin's Power of Wind being almost exactly the same thing seems to suggest some kind of blood connection.
Now that the Champions have upgraded into Sages, it's time for Chapter 12. Now Mineru explains what should have happened to the Zelda and the Master Sword from the main timeline. They go back to Korok Forest for CH12M1 to speak with the Great Deku Tree and free him from a Phantom Ganon. The Deku Tree is able to make sense of Mineru's story and explains that there should be a second Zelda and Master Sword in this timeline, and just like he does for Link in TotK, he helps the party find them. This brings us to CH12M2, back on the Great Sky Island fighting off hordes of monsters and Phantom Ganons to get to the Light Dragon. A more powerful Puppet Zelda is the boss of this mission, and after defeating her, Rauru discovers that the ghost of Sonia has been with this Zelda all along. Just like at the end of TotK, Rauru and Sonia's ghosts use an extremely powerful version of recall channeled through the Sacred Stone Zelda had kept, and return the Light Dragon to her previous form. This second Zelda becomes as separate new playable character that can be referred to in-game as Sage of Time, with her Secret Stone as her weapon type. Link will also get the second Master Sword, and after another powerful recall, the first Master Sword is restored, as well. Link dual wields them both as a new weapon type, and the old Master Sword and Hylian Shield from the base game becomes accessible again, too.
Sage of Time is able to realize that this is a timeline divergence and understands there should be another version of her that gets the Master Sword to the Link that she knew from her own timeline, and decides to stay here and help. Sonia ghost becomes another new playable character along with her, and from here we dive into Chapter 13, the final chapter of the expansion. CH13M1 will take place at Hyrule Castle, adjusted to account for the new split levels. This can work like the Lanayru Road map from Guardian of Remembrance where there were two separated battlefields with different things happening on them in the same scenario. The castle was suddenly overtaken by monsters and they must reclaim it. Mummy Ganondorf appears in the Sanctum as the boss of this mission. Our heroes are in trouble against him, and so Terrako does one last yoink from the future and calls Sidon, Yunobo, Riju, and Tulin from the future, post-TotK this time, in their full Sage power for one last hurrah on this timeline. Each of them gets a new outfit to make their appearance match their TotK designs while Tulin is introduced as playable. They get the Champion Weapons as new weapon types for each of them with new movesets, and to differentiate from the other Champion Weapons, we can give them that sparkle effect that pristine weapons you find in the Depths in TotK have. From here, we move into CH13M2, the final battle, in the deepest part of the Depths. This will be a highly expanded version of the War in the Depths of Hyrule phase of TotK's final battle, leading up to rehydrated Ganondorf as the final boss. Demon King Ganondorf gets to be a phase change, and so does Demon Dragon with a brand new exclusive arena in the sky for this fight, like the Blights got in AoC.
After Demon Dragon is defeated, the Future Sages return home to their timeline and the ghosts of Rauru, Sonia, and Mineru can now all pass on in peace. Sage of Time stays in this timeline in a bittersweet realization that she isn't able to return to her original timeline because there's already another version of her there. This timeline split now has two Master Swords for good. The heroes have a moment like the true ending of TotK where they all vow to continue to defend Hyrule.
Now that we've covered the story for this expansion, we need to move on to the game mechanics. I said before that Link's arm would still get jacked up so he'd still get Rauru's arm here. So how I would introduce the hand powers into AoC's format, without interrupting the runes, is I would put them on the same trigger button as the runes, but on the d-pad so that the runes can still be used on the face buttons. Similarly, we can select a few choice zonai devices to put on the other trigger with the magic rods and apples, doing the same thing. We could then incorporate these new abilities into environmental and combat mechanics, with Terrako sharing them between all the characters like he does with the runes. Rune counters and abilities still function the same as in the base game thanks to Terrako beefing up the Purah Pad.
Ascend is easy. It would still work the same way as in TotK, but it would see the most use on new maps with more verticality. Would also be good to use it on Battle Taluses like in TotK. Recall would also work the same way as in TotK; use it to reflect non-metal projectiles and also as an environmental gimmick like when enemies try rolling spike balls at you. Fuse could be used on zonai devices laying around, which I would have sprinkled throughout the maps as a new environmental thing you can do. Stick something to your weapon for a quick effect. For example, use Fuse on Flame/Frost/Shock Emitters to add a brief elemental effect to your attacks, and Fuse a Beam Emitter to shoot a beam whenever you guard for a short time. And Ultrahand would basically function as Autobuild to snap some of these environmental zonai devices together into a preset construction that will either attack enemies or allow you to traverse gaps in the map i.e. flinging yourself across a gap between sky islands, similar to how the little paraglider bits in AoC were. You would also be able to collect zonai capsules as a drop item, which then can be used on the R trigger where the magic rods are, but only certain ones, like maybe the Rocket and Time Bombs and Springs and Waterspouts.
As for the map screen, do what TotK did and make it possible to tab between the Sky and the Depths to access more points of interest. Add all the new points in the Zonai green color so they don't get lost among all the old Sheikah blues. This will give plenty of space for more stuff without overcrowding the already-pretty-full map we currently have in AoC. Also, we can make Ganondorf a new playable character (Demon King form costume included) through some postgame missions. All characters would get upgraded abilities and new moves and increased level cap, as well. And naturally, Link will get access to all the new armors introduced in TotK (including the version of the Hylian Hood with the hood down) as well as new weapons that fit in his types. Zelda will also get her starting outfit as a costume while Sage of Time gets the Zonai dress.
I want this to be DLC instead of a second game because I think the nature of AoC makes it much easier to just pick it back up and continue on, and I wanna keep all my upgraded weapons and stuff (and I don't wanna buy yet another full priced game lol). I just think it makes more sense to do it as an expansion instead of a sequel. Now, would they actually make an expansion for a 3-year-old game like that? Unlikely. I would just prefer it if they did. Like I said, I'm not saying that they're going to do this; just that if they did it at all, this is how I want it to happen. The only snag with that, though, is that AoC also sort of sets up for TotK with the Future Champions and the DLC which first introduced Tulin as having Power of Wind. I believe that the current play order to best experience the story of these three games is BotW > AoC > TotK. So this DLC expansion would then make that BotW > up through Guardian of Remembrance of AoC > TotK > the expansion of AoC. That's kinda awkward. Even so, I'd still prefer it as DLC... For one final wrinkle, I'm gonna go for the low hanging fruit and say this expansion should be named Age of Upheaval.
#legend of zelda#tears of the kingdom#age of calamity#breath of the wild#going insane wishing for something ill never have#zelda theory
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pumpkins and spices
s. Link and Zelda have been staying in Kakariko for a few days and crave a pumpkin-filled meal. After buying a pumpkin from Olkin and heading to High Produce Spirits for some spice, they run into the store owner’s husband—Steen—Olkin’s produce rival! In a desperate attempt to hide the pumpkin they bought, Zelda stuffs the small pumpkin under her shirt… causing a grave misunderstanding.
a/n: here's a ch 2!! I hope you all enjoy!
Ch 1 || ao3 (or u can read here on tmblr!)
Zelda can’t help but gaze at the creation in her hands in awe — it’s as smooth as ice, cut perfectly like a diamond. She had commissioned a glass pumpkin from Pruce’s glass blower friend — an exact replica of the pumpkin that brought her nothing but sheer embarrassment and horror just a week ago. For its size, she’s surprised by how light it feels. “It’s perfect, Pruce! It looks exactly like it!”
“Heh, my good ol’ friend delivers nothing short of perfection,” Pruce says with a proud smile. “He’s the best you’ll find in these parts, so don’t try lookin’ elsewhere!”
“I wouldn’t dream of it,” Zelda says, laughing lightly. She happily wraps up the gift back into the plain white cloth it came in. She knows Link will be absolutely thrilled to receive it since he’s been glum the entire week ever since they cut up the pumpkin a few days ago for dinner. Now he can have an exact replica of the very pumpkin forever. He had pleaded and begged Zelda not to use it because it was (his words) their child and how could she?? What a monster she was for even thinking about eating the pumpkin after all they’ve been through!
“Link, it’s going to get rotten. It’s not going to stay cute and plump like this forever.”
“And so you would strip it of its remaining days just like that??”
The look of despair on his face as she tossed the diced up pumpkin into the cook pot without batting an eye is something she’ll never forget, and just the mere thought of it makes laughter bubble up in her chest.
Zelda says her thanks to Pruce once again before leaving East Wind. As she takes a step outside, she lets out a low whistle of surprise — It’s pouring. It was sunny when she left just half an hour ago. She glances down at the wrapped up bundle, contemplating. It should be fine if it got wet, but she really doesn’t want to risk it… besides, bringing in a soppy wet ball into the house would be quite annoying for the both of them.
It’s a good thing she brought her cape at least; it’ll leave the rest of her clothes dry. Zelda secures it over her shoulders, pulling her hood up. And, without much thought, she tucks the glass pumpkin under her shirt-
She pauses, hesitant. The last time she did this she created a massive disaster of a misunderstanding but… This is Hateno. It’s fine! She’ll be fine. Besides, since it’s pouring, most people would have sought shelter indoors, anyway.
Zelda tucks it snug under her shirt and braves the pouring rain — It pounds against the earthen roads and vibrant green grass, the strength of it leaves the space around her misty, making it hard to see much of what’s in front of her.
She makes it back to the house without much of a hitch, relieved to be out of the wet outdoors. She can’t wait to see the look on his face. Zelda swings the door open-
“-ould hide it from me?? That’s quite bold!”
Zelda shakes her head to get the small strands of her hair clinging to her cheeks off, confused that she’s hearing Impa’s voice in Hateno. She still has one hand propping the door open and the other hand tucked under the glass pumpkin hidden beneath her shirt as she processes what she’s seeing in front of her: a stiff-as-a-board Link and a looming Impa sitting at their table. It looks as if Impa is interrogating him. Despite her short stature, her piercing gaze can make anyone feel small on the spot. And… there’s a whole escort team of Sheikah guards lined up behind her, standing at attention.
Before Zelda can open her mouth, move, or let alone breathe, Impa beats her to it all. She bolts straight up from her seat, causing it to topple over. Her mouth is agape and she’s gasping as if she’s seeing Hylia in the flesh, but she’s not looking Zelda in the face, she’s looking at her stomach. “So the rumors are true!”
Link whips his head over to Zelda, eyes wide in alarm, but not even he can get a word in either.
“Oh I have been waiting for this for over a hundred years!” she hoots, clapping delightedly. “I’m sure you’re glad, Princess Zelda!”
Heat flares to her cheeks. Oh dear Hylia do not tell me she’s going to…! “Impa, wait-”
“Remember all those nights you spent sleepless because you were distraught over your feelings for him??”
“Now hold on a moment-” Zelda squeaks as the color drains from her face, her eyes darting from Link to Impa in a flurry of panic. Oh no no no no-
“‘Oh I wish I could tell him how I feel~’” Impa mimics Zelda’s voice in a light and airy tone, dramatically placing the back of her hand on her forehead, feigning lightheadedness. “Now look at that, a century later and you’re having a child together! And I’ve heard you’re five months along!” she cackles, placing her hands over her stomach as her laughter doesn’t let up for the slightest moment. “Now I suppose all those late nights mourning over your so-called ‘unrequited love’ has paid off in the end-”
Zelda stomps her way over to her and slams her free hand on the table.
Link flinches. Impa flinches.
Even the Sheikah guards, who were as still as statues, flinch.
Without a word, Zelda pulls the wrapped glass pumpkin from under her shirt and carefully, delicately, places it on the table. Then, she lifts her shirt to expose her stomach and jabs at it. She opens her mouth and hisses: “I. Am. Not. Pregnant. Do I look five months pregnant to you??” Zelda pulls her shirt down with an unnecessary amount of force as she glares at Impa, slamming her hands on the table again as she leans over to her. “And how dare you say that! You promised me that you wouldn’t tell anyone about that ever!! You promised to take it to your grave!! Even if we were together — which we are not by the way — I wouldn’t want him to know about any of that ever!”
Zelda’s chest heaves up and down and she just cannot believe it!
“Who… you were the one that told me to never believe a word Trissa says! So why would you-” she squeaks as she sinks to the ground, placing her forehead against the table. This is too much — everyone is just too much! “Get out,” she seethes.
When no one moves or says anything, Zelda bolts upright, her arms stiff at her side. She glares at Impa. She glares at Link. She glares at the bundle of Sheikah guards who avert their gaze away the moment she shoots a deathly stare at them. “Well? I said get out! All of you!”
“Um, Zelda,” Link says quietly, placing a gentle hand on her arm.
“You-” Her voice gets caught in her throat. He knows. He knows! About her feelings and how she acted back then and… and now he’s looking at her with an unreadable expression and she just can’t. “-Definitely. You definitely have to get out!” Zelda grabs his arm and hauls him up, dragging him to the front door. She opens it and pushes him out, refusing to even look at him. She whips around. “All of you- out. Now!”
And finally, they move. The Sheikah guards scramble to assist Impa who hurriedly walks out of the house with a grimace.
The door clicks shut.
The house is quiet, and all Zelda can hear is the soft pit-pat of the rain and the blood rushing in her ears.
-----------------------------
“I told you she wasn’t pregnant,” Link mutters, after 10 minutes of sitting outside with the Sheikah chief in silence. He’s lying down on his back with his arms tucked under his head and a piece of hay straw hanging between his lips, deep in thought. Impa had shooed away the guards back to the carriage before they decided to seek refuge in the horse shed. At least the hay was warm and dry. Impa doesn’t seem fond of sitting in it though because she’s constantly muttering about how itchy it’s making her feel.
“Yeah yeah.” Her tone implies indifference, but he can tell that she does feel a smidge guilty with the way she sighs after. “Well, now that it’s out of the bag, were you truly unaware of her feelings toward you?”
“Uh…” He coughs and spits out the hay straw — he almost swallowed it in surprise. An inkling of him clung onto the fact that maybe, just maybe, she did. But- he can’t think like that. Or at least, couldn’t, because if she didn’t feel the same way then… well.
It’d probably break his heart beyond comprehension.
And he didn’t want his heart broken.
“Well? Speak up, boy.”
“I didn’t let it cross my mind.” He sighs loudly, flopping over to his side in a huff. “I didn’t want to bother her with something like that.”
“Anyone a mile away could see she was head over heels for you, you knucklehead.”
“Well excuse me…” Link mutters as he rolls his eyes and shoots Impa a glare. How was he supposed to know someone like her would like someone like him?? She’s all goddess and beauty and ethereal who kept the world from succumbing to total destruction and he’s… just some guy with a sword that had slept for a 100 years.
He loves making her laugh and smile and he wants to keep it that way and he just doesn’t know if he can make her happy if they ever get… together.
Because, as Impa said: he’s a knucklehead.
-----------------------------
This is salvageable, Zelda thinks brightly to herself as she paces around the house: up the stairs, around the loft, down the stairs, cleans the dishes, sweeps the floors, rearranges the books on the shelves-
They’re adults! They can have a proper conversation about this over some tea and cookies, maybe have a good laugh over bygone emotions because it’s been over a century so surely it’s been long enough for her to… to have rid of these emotions, right?
Time heals. Time always heals. And this is no different — Sure, it’ll be a bit weird at first, but as she stated earlier, they’re both adults. There’s nothing to worry about, she chides, nodding to herself encouragingly as she dusts off the last book. She’ll give a proper send off to Impa after handing her some hateno-fermented cheese, give Link the glass pumpkin as planned, and they’ll finish the rest of the pumpkin stew for dinner tonight.
“Zelda?”
She jumps in her spot, almost toppling over a few books she had just dusted. She searches for the source of the voice and… there he is — the window from the upper floor. He seems a bit nervous with the way his eyes flit to and fro, as if he’s ready to duck out at any moment. As they make eye contact, he gives a friendly wave with a half-tilted smile.
It makes her stomach drop, makes her heart do flips and flutters and-
Stop that, she thinks to herself irritably, biting her inner cheek. “Yes, Link?”
“...How are you doing?”
A beat passes as Zelda contemplates her answer.
“Quite alright. I was just about to call the two of you actually. Is Impa… would she like to stay for dinner?” she asks politely, casting her gaze elsewhere.
“She left a little ago, said she had some things to do back in Kakariko Village.”
Zelda’s heart sank as guilt nibbled at her.
“Don’t worry,” Link mentions, as if reading her mind, “I gave the cheese to her when she first came.”
Zelda perks up at the news, giving a relieved smile. “That’s good, I was worried she came all this way just to go back empty handed…”
Suddenly, Link climbs through the window, his movements and steps as quiet as a mouse. It’s always a wonder how he can always be so silent. “Er, sorry can I come in?”
Zelda scoffs. “You don’t have to ask for permission, this is your house after all.”
He leans over the railing of the loft area, resting against his arms. “Our house,” he says quietly, with a sort of fondness and confidence that makes her cheeks warm.
Zelda smiles with a raised eyebrow, a bit confused and unsure about how to take it with the way he said it. She decides to brush it off, as she usually does, when he does… that. Those quiet, soft moments. Small glances, lingering touches, when he says something that steps over the line of just-a-friend. Well, it was always like this with him, even before the Calamity, so she’s trained in the arts of not thinking too hard about it.
It’s funny that that hasn’t changed, especially since he had lost his memories.
“Well, the surprise is ruined.” Zelda nudges her head over to the glass pumpkin on the dining table.
He jumps off of the railing and takes it into his hands — His eyes sparkle up as he switches his attention to Zelda with child-like awe. “Pumpkarella??”
“His name is Oliver! We agreed on Oliver!” They argued the entire way back from Kakariko about what the name of the pumpkin should be and Link relented every time, but always managed to still find ways to argue about it.
Link squints his eyes as he holds up the glass pumpkin in observation. “She seems more like a Pumpkarella to me…”
“That’s not even a real name!”
“All names are made up aren’t they?”
Zelda rolls her eyes and places her hands on her hips. “Oliver Pumpkarella Hyrule. That’s the best I can do for you.”
Link taps his finger on his chin with dramatically scrunched brows, feigning deep thought. “Sounds like a name fit for a royal, so deal.”
Relief spreads across Zelda like a gentle, cool breeze. Their banter is back, things feel normal. So maybe… she doesn’t have to bring it up! Maybe they can continue on like normal as they always have — Goddess princess and sworn knight. Best of friends. “I suppose the name you choose for our next child can be the first name,” she says lightly with a light-hearted laugh. She doesn’t hear him laugh along with her, like he usually does. Zelda peeks over at him, and sees that he’s…
Red. Tomato red. Hylian tomato red. Maybe even blood moon red.
Zelda wracks her brain, backtracks, what did I say??
Child. She said child.
Our next child!!
Zelda is on the cusp of joining the Yiga to resummon Calamity Ganon so that he can end her bloodline right then and there-
“Zelda, I…” he begins, hesitating, all traces of jovial banter gone from his voice and the only thing Zelda can think is oh Hylia, end me.
“Fine!” Her hands tighten to fists at her side as she stares hard at her feet, her face scrunched up in utter frustration. If he’s going to reject her and tell her that he doesn’t feel the same, she’d rather give a proper confession first, because it’s been years! Too many years to count! And it’s been eating her alive — every minute, every second — and now she can finally say it. “Yes, I was in love with you!” She bites the inside of her cheek, hoping the pain from it can mask the horror that will overcome her for saying the next thing. “And even now I-I’m still in love with you and it’s-”
The words remain stuck in her throat as tears well up in her eyes because it’s killing her knowing she’s throwing everything they’ve ever been down the drain because she just can’t seem to get over her unreciprocated feelings. And she’ll have to live every day after this knowing that he doesn’t feel the same about her and everything he’s done until now was out of duty that she desperately hoped was out of affection.
Her next words come out fragile and wilted, despairing: “I’m sorry-”
Her head is pulled up by her chin, too fast for her brain to process as her view changes from her bare feet against faded hardwood to endless blue eyes — She can see herself, too much of herself, and then she’s drowning as he smashes his lips against hers and takes the air away from her lungs.
Her head spins and she stumbles back, taking him with her as her hands automatically find their way to his neck before tangling up into his hair. Her back hits the bookshelf she oh so carefully dusted earlier — several books tumble off the shelf, thudding against the floor. For a brief moment she thinks oh, we’ll have to clean that up later, but her thoughts are swiftly taken away from her once more when his hand moves from the dip of her waist to the curve of her neck, his thumb tracing the line of her jaw, and she’s reminded of the heat pressed against her body; the overwhelming smell of him, in which she’s only used to in faint passing. All birch and smoke like a comforting campfire.
And just as quick as it happened, it ends.
Zelda's breaths come in shallow and fast; she finds herself leaning toward him as he pulls back, with eyes locked on his parted lips, inexplicably hungry for more.
Mine.
She kisses him again and again, drinking and savoring every shared breath as if she hasn’t had a drop of water in days.
“I adore you,” he somehow manages to say against her lips, in between brief moments of respite, as she feels him smile. His voice is quiet, like she’s slowly drifting into a dream as she’s falling asleep. He gazes at her through his half-lidded eyes as if she’s the sun, moon, and stars. “I love you and that has never changed. Even before the moment I heard your voice, I knew I was in love with you. It’ll always be you, it always has been.”
Tears prick the corner of her eyes—she fights them off, unwilling to become a babbling mess in front of him.
“And,” he says, leaning back to finally get a good look at her flushed face. His slight smile widens to a goofy grin. “I would love to have another kid with you.”
Zelda’s incoming tears break into laughter instead. She leans full into his arms as she nuzzles her head into the crook of his neck, tightening her arms around him as she melts into his warmth. “I suppose it’s only fair if you get to choose the next one.”
He hums, and she can feel the purr of it on her cheek. “How about Spindelina?”
Appalled, Zelda pulls back, but she doesn’t get too far since his arms are wrapped snug and tight around her waist. “You are terrible at choosing names, you know that?”
“Hey, I know you love them.”She tilts her head down with a lopsided smirk. “Well, I love you, so I guess so, hm?”
#zelink#totk#botw#tears of the kingdom#breath of the wild#loz#legend of zelda#my fanfics#the 2nd part!! i hope u all enjoy!#i gave it a proper image and stuffs heh
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humbly requesting a sickfic starter pack, for research purposes of course
(how does everyone react to being sick/others being sick, whatever you can think of <3)
Asking the easy questions, I see LOL. Sounds good why not.
Skyloft:
He's very used to being sick at this point, and has 1001 ways to entertain himself (carving, weaving, doing needlework, literally anything) but probably doesn't have anything on hand so he'll be more than a little stir-crazy. He much prefers to be taking care of others, and is extremely patient even if someone's cussing him out.
Minish:
Hates being sick. Ball of blankets that hisses at you for disturbing him, even if its with food. He has generally no idea how to handle other people being sick, although he'd probably cuddle if someone needed it and he trusted them enough to touch.
Kokiri:
Will deny he's sick right up until he passes out. Absolute misery to take care of, will sneak out as soon as he feels well enough to try and possibly sooner. Hates taking care of others, and has zero patience for it, but would cooperate with providing distraction if asked.
Outset:
Will deny he's sick right up until he passes out. This goes great with often being on a boat, yes. Misery to take care of, will sneak out as soon as he feels well enough to try. Finds it much more fun to take care of someone else and likes to be the one fussing instead, and is pretty good at providing distraction in terms of tall tales and chattering and cuddles.
Chief:
Will deny he's sick, although not quite to the point of passing out. Sullen and prefers to take care of himself if he can manage it, extremely impatient. Won't sneak out, but WILL sit up for hours reading and taking notes when he shouldn't. Extremely patient taking care of others, although he's a little brusque about it and not super inclined to cuddle anyone unless he thinks they actively need it to stay put.
Ordon:
Will deny he's sick, although not quite to the point of passing out. Sulks massively. Sometimes turns into a wolf just because he's so bored and wolf brain makes it suck less. (Ilia is incredibly annoyed every time he does this.) Doting caretaker who's happy to take care of everything someone needs. Has absolutely spent entire days just holding his sick kids and not putting them down because they asked him to.
Four:
Will deny he's sick right up until he's passing out. Impossible to keep still, will escape the moment he can try. Would rather suffer alone than let anyone see him weak. (If one is sick, *all of them* are sick, excluding Shadow who can't get sick.) Absolute shit caretaker to anyone ~~including~~ but themselves. Impatient and more likely to tease than help, but good for entertaining someone who needs to stay put if they find him funny.
Prince:
Will deny he's sick almost to the point of passing out, then prefers to recover alone. Incredibly prickly about who he allows near him, and bad-tempered about it, although he won't try to escape unless triggered. Can be a very sweet caretaker, but he's particular about who he'll offer it to and is even less likely to cuddle than usual under the circumstances (unless it's someone's he's very close to: Chief, Smith, Kokiri or his Zelda.)
Rabbit:
Absolute sullen mess. Won't deny it but will still push himself to ridiculous lengths because he's impatient with recovery. Sulks massively once he admits he's sick. Decent caretaker, but also a bit impatient there and more inclined to teasing care than fluffy care.
Smith:
Also a sullen mess. Will bundle herself in blankets and sulk it out,but is grudgingly happy about getting taken care of. Very much wants to cuddle, but tends to be shy about asking for it. Does not really know what to do about taking care of someone else, but would try (and mostly model it off Ravio's example when taking care of her.) Very sweet and attentive, and has a strong tendency towards worry.
Far:
Extremely sensitive to when he's getting sick and tries to hide it, but he doesn't deny it. He'll dial himself back and become very quiet and take it easy and try to fend it off, and probably will be extremely uncomfortable with the group because his usual way of coping is "Hide until it passes" and he can't. Does not know how to take comfort well. *Does* know how to *give* it and is extremely doting and attentive and fusses about someone else if they seem remotely accepting.
Hateno:
Will deny it until he passes out; also tends towards "Hide in a corner until it passes" and will be an absolute bitch when he can't. Hissy ball of blankets, even over food because he'll be mad he can't cook for himself. Moderately decent at taking care of someone else, will fuss and spend a LOT of time cooking for them and offering blankets; not super keen on cuddling unless he trusts someone. VERY keen on cuddling if he does.
Hope that answers it!!
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Love your fics! If you're still taking lonelyeyes prompts, how about 18.) "I didn't get soaked wet through walking to your house for you to say no to pizza. I have beer too. I know you're sad, so let me in." Or 70.) "After everything we've been through, you still don't think that I love you?"
Hi! First of all, apologies for taking so damn long to reply... Life happened to me and I wanted to save this for when I was feeling a bit more creative. With that being said, thank you for your prompt! This was fun to write and it actually made me want to continue LOL
I hope you like it! Cute slice of life lonelyeyes ahead 👉
18 - “I didn’t get soaked through wet walking to your house for you to say no to pizza. I have beer too. I know you’re sad, so let me in.”
Peter’s phone chirped with an incoming message as he died again in God of War. He cursed and chucked the control away, rubbed his face and grabbed his mobile. He read Elias’ message as he scratched his chin.
So, how’d it go?
“Urgh,” he moaned.
This was a conversation he wasn’t keen on having. Elias had been way more invested in this job offer than Peter, and had been teeming with excitement from the moment Peter had told him about it.
Elias had helped Peter prepare in spite of Peter’s lack of discipline, and Peter had to admit that Elias’ methods had helped. But Peter was Peter, after all. He didn’t have the heart to tell Elias that he had blown it. Again.
Fine, I guess, he typed back.
Oh, no. That bad?
Peter laughed bitterly. Yeah. I’m sorry.
Don’t be. There’ll be other opportunities, and I’ll be there to help.
Sure. Thanks.
Peter threw the phone away and picked up the control again. The phone buzzed behind him with an incoming call, but he ignored it and tried to lose himself in the game. When GoW didn’t do it, he switched to his Nintendo. Maybe some Zelda. That got his attention a bit more, and he alternated between scratching his balls, playing, and eating potato chips.
He got up once to piss and another to grab something to drink, but there was only some old soda left in the fridge and he wouldn’t subject himself to that again. He eyed a bag of instant noodles, but between hunger and the desire to be laid flat on a comfy surface doing absolutely jackshit, he opted for the latter.
Sure, there will be other opportunities, he thought sarcastically.
His only chance of finally acquiring his so desired financial independence, and he had fucking thrown it in the bin. He didn’t want to think about the next time he’d meet his dad and have to tell him that his useless piece of garbage of a son would be living off of his earnings yet another year.
He had tried it all, had called and emailed everyone, but apparently his resumé either wasn’t good enough, or he was overqualified for the position, or this, or that… He never got past the first interview, and he believed that his family name had something to do with it. It was all too convenient for his father to have this hold on him. Can’t say no to someone you depend upon for a living.
Peter closed the game angrily, overwhelmed by this wave of bitterness. If only he could shed his skin like a snake and wade into the ocean never to be seen again, he’d do just that.
The intercom rang loudly. Peter trudged towards the kitchen and picked it up.
“Hey, it’s Peter here.”
“Open up.”
Elias?!
“What are you doing here, man?”
“I’ve come to steal your massive TV and piss in every single one of your cups, what the fuck do you think I’m doing here in the middle of this bloody storm? You sounded like you needed it, so I’m here to see you.”
Peter turned around looking for a window and sure enough it was absolutely pouring outside. He hadn’t even noticed.
“Huh,” he said, intelligently. “Look, man, I appreciate the gesture, but-”
Elias interrupted him. “Oh, no way. I didn’t get soaked through wet walking to your house for you to say no to pizza. I have beer too. I know you’re sad, so let me in.”
Peter was too stunned to do anything other than smile. “Okay, hold on.”
A couple minutes later, Elias was at his door. He looked very much like a wet rat, thin brown curls pasted to his forehead and baggy clothes sticking to his sinewy limbs and light brown skin.
“Took you long enough,” Elias said, shoving the bags into Peter’s hands. “It’s coming down out there.”
Elias removed his scarf and hung it on the hallway pegs along with his coat and a yellow umbrella that looked like it had seen better days.
“Why the hell did you walk here, anyway?” Peter asked.
“The rain let up and I thought I’d be faster. But unfortunately the only place that makes your disgusting hawaiian pizza the way you like it is three blocks in the opposite direction from both our houses, so. You should thank me for that.”
“Thank you,” Peter said with all honesty in the world around a mouthful of drool. His stomach growled anxiously. “You don’t mind if I…?” he pointed at the pizza boxes.
“Oh no, go ahead. I’ll be borrowing your bathroom and some of your clothes for a bit.”
“Yeah, yeah…” Peter waved him away. He had some serious business with this pizza and its lovely juicy pineapple slices.
Peter was already two slices in when Elias came out of the bathroom into the living room, looking even more like a rat than before, only now a dry one. Peter’s clothes were too big for him.
“Not a word,” Elias warned when he saw the same old obnoxious laughter forming on Peter’s face.
Peter nodded solemnly and bit into his pizza. Elias grabbed himself a piece of a pepperoni one and made himself comfortable on Peter’s couch. They watched the entire Transformers franchise until late in the night and never talked more than just to make a few comments about the cast that would have other people going “wait, are you…? (hand gesture)”.
Peter beat him twice in a burping competition, but that earned him a burning nose full of beer when it all came bubbling back up. When they finally stopped laughing about it (for it came and went in sudden hysterical fits), Elias yawned and told Peter that it was time for him to go. He still had work the next day.
“But tomorrow is a Saturday,” Peter pointed out.
“Yeah, I told them that,” Elias said, rubbing a tired eye. “But it was the only time this student and I had available. My entire week was booked. Got up at five today. This job is killing me.”
Peter felt something in his chest grow impossibly warm upon realising that Elias had sacrificed his Friday night rest to be with his moping arse. He blushed. “You should’ve stayed home and rested…”
Elias waved him off. “You were in a dump, couldn’t leave you there all alone.”
Peter smiled shyly. “Thank you. Next time though, choose sleep. I mean it, I'll be fine.”
“Oh I’m gonna. As soon as I get home. Now,” Elias patted both his knees and made to get up.
Peter’s hand was on his thigh before he could think of what he was doing.
“Stay.”
Elias looked at him, then at the hand on his thigh. They both blushed hard and Peter pulled away quickly.
“Sorry," Peter said. “Stay, though. I can pull out the couch and get you some blankets. I’ll make you coffee tomorrow and drive you to work. Your clothes should be dry until then.”
“Okay, that sounds very nice actually” Elias said, voice too soft. He cleared his throat. “Thanks, mate.”
Peter beamed. “No, thank you. I was, heh- I was really going through it when you got here.”
“Yeah, I figured as much.” Elias’ expression was a mix of sad and worried. Tentatively, he reached out for Peter’s hand as if to hold it, but only patted it instead. His mouth was a thin awkward line, while Peter’s heart felt like it would beat out of its ribcage any moment now.
“Couldn’t leave my- my best friend alone at a time like this.”
Peter snorted a self-conscious chuckle. If only he had a word for what he was feeling, he might grow the balls to say it, to let Elias know.
For now though, he settled on a nod and a “thank you.”
#do not archive#my fic#lonelyeyes#lonelyeyes fic#tma#tma fic#Elias Bouchard#Peter Lukas#i don't even know where this prompt list is anymore lol
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hey so. so the dutch nintendo acc released a trailer for TotK today. including a shot of the seven heroines. BUT THERE SURE AIN'T SEVEN ANYMORE
THERE'S ONLY FOUR??? WHERE DO YOU TAKE THREE MASSIVE STATUES
i literally looked up someone doing the seven heroines quest to double check but like yeah no they are MISSING
theory ramblings and bad drawing under the readmore:
(additional points bc i think it was pointcrow who i saw raising the point that the "tears" shown seem to match the puzzle balls for the shrine quest there, EXCEPT THAT DOESN'T REALLY HELP)
i present to you the ugliest drawing ever that i used to double check which statues are missing (green circles) and which puzzle ball symbol belongs to which one. This is kinda where my lead ends, but i do think it's really interesting (suspicious) that the comma one that i believe is supposed to relate to the tear zelda has in the trailer, is one of the ones that's missing.
Are the missing statues the ones whose tear has been activated? the comma for zelda, the ball for a possibly cursed/bound yunobo, and the S shape in hands of the zonai or gifted to link?? (and the missing eight statue representing ganon and its absence masking his return)
#foxtrot is zelda posting#im sorry guys ive fallen down the rabbit hole please mute the previous tag if you dont want to witness me connecting dots#i do think i might be one of the earliest to catch this literally just because who tf watches the dutch trailers#totk#tears of the kingdom
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So, Ganon... did it ever occour to you that by fucking both Zelda and Link you could take over Hyrule with no problems?
"The thought did actually cross my mind. I can control the entire kingdom and just let my minions destroy everything. However....." He stopped speaking to look down. Link was eagerly bobbing his head up and down the Gerudo Kings dark massive meat, unable to stop lusting over his manly cock. Link has become such a whore since he was easily defeated by the hands of ganon, he just can't get enough of him now. Zelda was tending her new master's balls, she's been quite happy since her capture. Ganons cock is her whole life now.
"These two are now my loyal obedient sluts so I think I will just rule the kingdom from the distance and let my minions take care of things"
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Oops! All Zelda! 1C: Deku getting to enjoy the mouths of both Bronya and Ochako
Izuku had achieved many things in his life: becoming the disciple of All-Might, getting into UA, mastering himself, the wealth of power he inherited, and finally; becoming the new Symbol of Peace. But none of those accolades mattered to him as he returned to his home, as he knew he'd be able to just be himself and relax. He sighed as he stripped out of his hero costume as he felt the cool air of his home hit his skin.
While he loved doing good, inspiring the next genres, and ensuring the next generation grows up happy and safe. Izuku certainly didn't like the constant pressure to be firing on all cylinders, giving 200% every single day. He closed his eyes and let out a tired sigh as he made his way to the plush sofa that was just calling out his name. Izuku fell onto the furniture and let his eyes softly close as he took in the moment and relaxed.
"Awww... our poor baby, overworked and under-appreciated." A female voice cooed, causing Izuku to open his eyes and start to sit up. Only for his assent to be halted as two arms snaked around him and pulled him back down. That was when Izuku's exhausted mind recognised the voice who spoke.
"Ochako!" Izuku shouted out, surprised his colleague and long-time crush was in his house, and seeing his naked body. Izuku attempted to cover himself with a cushion, only to have it knocked away.
"It's not just Subject Ochako who is here. The Bronya is also here." Izuku felt the breath of the mental manifesting Hero Reason Bunny hit his ear; while his eyes were locked on Ochako in front of him. It took this dawning realisation for Izuku's exhausted brain to register two large, soft, and round things pressing into his back and that Ochako was nude, putting her massively curvaceous physique on display. It was like the set up to a potent wet dream
"We know how hard you work and how tired you make yourself." Ochako continued as she moved to kneel in front of Izuku. Softly pushing his legs wide apart and resting her chubby cheek against his inner thigh, mouth mere inches from his heavy, backed-up ballsack.
"Subject Ochako and The Bronya decided to show appreciation in a way you'd find most appealing Subject Izuku." Bronya added as she layered atop his leg, with her head resting on his abdomen staring down at the head of his hardening cock.
Izuku felt his voice fail him and simply waited for the two women he had a powerful desire to have their way with him. Izuku felt the seconds painfully tick past before his body was hit with a burst of sensation and wild pleasure. Bronya and Ochako had both taken him into their mouths; Ochako softly massaged and suckled on his heavy, cum-laden balls, while Bronya slowly worked her way from his tip down to his base and back again.
The pair worked with such a drive and zeal that Izuku found himself being pushed to his utter and absolute limits from just their mouths alone. Until Izuku felt a head-spinning feeling rush through him, as it for a moment he was weightless and he lost control. "I-I AAHN! I'M CUMMING!" Izuku felt Bronya hilt him inside her throat as he blasted rope after rope down her throat.
Izuku barely managed to pull himself into a rough half-sitting position as he gasped out. "W-what was that?" His eyes shifting from the platinum blonde to the thicc brunette.
"I learned that I can affect the weight of more than just objects," Ochako softly answered. "But it comes with a side effect of intense physical stimulation. Which is why you instantly came." Ochako punctuated her statement by kissing his balls. "But it seems that you still have so much more for us."
Bronya pushed Izuku back down as she kissed his member. "Subject Ochako and The Bronya will thank you until you have nothing left to give Subject Izuku."
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Soft FEH OCs Headcanons
Fjorm || Princess of Ice
Self-explanatory really,without vengeance on Surtr running through her head 24/7. Fjorm is just a massive huggable ball of softness
Can't see her NOT loving cuddles,her favourite cuddle partners are Ylgr,Sharena and of course,Gunnthrà
Also good at baking sweets since her mother (+Gunnthrà) taught her when she was little
Has a crush on Laegjarn,but has no horny thoughts,just thoughts of Laegjarn picking her up or cuddling her
Eir || Bringer of Life
The moment Veronica meets Eir again,she's getting pulled into an emotional squeeze
You can't tell me Eir doesn't love making LOTS of flower crowns during Day of Devotion
Probably gets easily embrassed whenever Ymir talks about her childhood before Hel pulled up and spun the block
Speaking of Ymir,anyone that dates Eir is the luckiest person alive because Eir will show you just how gorgeous and pure the Realm of Life is
Peony || Cherished Dream
Accidentally called Freyr papa once
Before you ask,yes,Mirabillis also made the same mistake
Peony semi-canonocally likes to play childish games like hide and seek or tag,especially with Sharena but really wants to play with Veronica but is too scared to ask
Probably one of the most cuddliest people you'll meet in the Order of Heroes
Reginn || Bearing Hope
Since Reginn is described to be tomboyish,she would probably try to bench press with Dagr only to fail at first try
Definitely a terrible dancer,but makes it up for it by being canonically good at cooking so she'd bring lots of goodies in parties
First one to cry whenever the girls play a scary game
Tempest Trials better cook once its her time to shine
Ash || Retainer to Askr
Ash loves any food involving milk since she's a literal Divine Cow
And yes,her favourite Ice Cream is Vanilla
Probably doesn't like how Veronica is willing to carry her father's legacy for very obvious reasons
Also has a very good listening ear so people like the Summoner or Veronica can vent about their feelings
Seiðr || Goddess of Hope
Aegis Main (Gullveig maining Palutena and Kvasir mailing Zelda(
Seiðr is actually pretty cheerful,but I think it's canon so idk really
Favourite cuddle partner is Heiðr and is very very shy to ask either Kvasir or Gullveig for a cuddle session
Her and Alear would probably be besties
Ratatoskr || Healing Hand
Probably the only sane one in her family unless her mother is also innocent but only time will tell
Will try her to best to EMOTIONALLY or MENTALLY heal people like Edelgard or Idunn
She doesn't care if they have alot to talk about,as long as they are healing,then she would have no problem listening to them
Also the easiest one to get jumpscared whenever the girls play a horror game
#fire emblem#fire emblem heroes#feh#seidr#fjorm#eir#reginn#feh ash#ratatoskr#feh peony#soft headcanons#fire emblem headcanons
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S5 Ep 40 Pt2: Time to Bother Bakura (In Kul Elna)
We have arrived in Kul Elna! And it looks like a bomb exploded on it. Which like...I dunno how the process of making the Millennium items works, the show gracefully cuts away at the inferred carnage, but it removed the roofs.
And then this blessed being shows up.
BLESSED BABIES.
Look at their eyes!
Their funny little open maws!
Obsessed.
(read more under the cut)
Down in a crypt where the Millennium items were forged, Bakura is vibing in the best way he knows how. If my brain weren’t so strewn with so much freakin long covid that turns it into moth balls and if I weren’t behind on everything in life, it would be fun to draw this situation. I mean look at this situation.
Like when this anime wants to get extra and weird, it gives it the full weird, and I appreciate that. This is not subtle at all, and that’s why I like it. Corny as hell. Extra aesthetic. Keep it up, this is the good stuff.
Pharaoh enters the tomb (or whatever the hell it is--not entirely sure what this underground Legend of Zelda temple was before it became the super haunted place where the items were made. Probably a cellar for storing that garlic they like to eat so much.) and the rest of his crew stays behind to fight oodles of skeletons.
The whiplash between silly skeleton fight and Pharaoh facing his demons down in the crypt was pretty funny.
This is probably some Dark Magician girl lore that I should know but I don’t. Like on a good day I don’t watch the card fights and so on an off day like today you bet your ass I have no memory of it.
Since it’s About Time Already, Bakura finally explains this guy who we saw waaaay back in Season 1.
As I was remarking with bro how there was symbolism to the puzzle being over the heart Bro said “and the ring is over the dick” and he also says he wishes to rescind his statement, but he’s not wrong I mean...look where it is.
But now we know, this big ol millennium stone was filled with dead people the whole time! There we go, that’s uh...that’s new information. Not like we haven’t had a bunch of items with dead people souls in it in this show, but this guy is like when you go to the gas station and they got like little chips and sandwiches you can buy--but then there’s the REALLY BIG PICKLE.
Which like I dunno if this is a universal thing, the big pickle, but at every single store there’s this massive pickle and you’re like “well that’s weird, but who is buying these???” and then you see one in your fridge and it’s “OMG is it my roommate?” and then you go to your friends house and the big pickle is there, and then you go to your mom’s house and big pickle is there. Everyone gets the big pickle. Everyone respects and understands the weird ass giant pickle but you.
That’s Yami and this tablet.
Forgive me if that makes zero sense but my long covid brain is convinced that was a good metaphor.
Anyway long story short, Yami is about to get chewed up by ghosts which...he’s a ghost already but don’t worry about it.
Bakura will try and redeem himself constantly with how he’s the last soul survivor of a dead civilization but when you think about it...everyone from Pharaoh’s era is dead by now so like preaching to the choir a bit.
Also, we get a glam up by Mahad, back in business, as the Dark Magician, in a suit he cannot turn his head to the right or left in.
Every time I see Dark Magician man it’s like
I get that they’re committed to the hat at season 5, but like It’s a banana. It screams banana.
Y’all I haven’t touched this card game in like 5 months because of the LC and I gotta tell you: I already forgot every single one of the rules so I’m thankful this season that the card fights are kind of just normal ass fights.
PS if this is like the fault of my brain or the dub, like you can let me know but like...
...did Mahad in his banana suit really infer in this episode that it’s OK that Bakura’s town got supermurdered because they were criminals? Like, Mahad, that’s a bad tweet, you should delete it.
But then again, that is on point for how the justice system worked in 3000 BC.
Convinced that Pharaoh’s Dad died in order to free Pharaoh from the burden of All Those Dead People, he is ready to play cards and unite Egypt. hallucinate.
And then Guess who shows up, that’s right...the girl who once gave us a giant sword in a dream about an evil Aurora Borealis. It’s Dark Magician girl, who exists before I thought she should exist yet in the Yugioh timeline. But that’s OK, because she’s here now.
...man here I was thinking Mana would hella die and get turned into a card in order for Dark Magician Girl to exist--but if that doesn’t need to happen. They’re two seperate people. Like in the same way Yami and Yugi are two seperate people (that look very different although similar haircuts) Which like, sucks for Mahad because he super died--but great for Mana, I guess.
It makes you wonder like...does anyone else die then? Is there hope for Seto’s Soon to be Dead Wife?
None. None hope, that wife is super dead, but maybe?
haha absolutely not.
Anyway here’s my link to read these in chrono order. Lets hope the next episode comes out quicker than the last one. I do have a goal to finish this season by the end of the year -- I think we can do it, but we shall see how the long covid pans out.
https://steve0discusses.tumblr.com/tagged/yugioh/chrono
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