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#you should know I’m crazy
lazycranberrydoodles · 6 months
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everybody go home. this is my magnum opus
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kagooleo · 1 month
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doodlin some joh’s
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messiahzzz · 2 months
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while it’s perfectly fine to have your own headcanons that are non-canon compliant — by all means, go wild. recognizing pieces of yourselves in fictional characters can be a very healing and validating experience. this is nonetheless a casual, well-intentioned reminder that gale, in fact, does not have bpd.
bpd is a pervasive pattern of instability affecting interpersonal relationships, self-image, and mood. the disorder is marked by impulsivity beginning in early adulthood and is present in a variety of contexts. a diagnosis requires at least 5 of the following 9 criteria to be met:
Fear of abandonment
Unstable or changing relationships
Unstable self-image; struggles with identity or sense of self
Impulsive or self-damaging behaviors (e.g., excessive spending, unsafe sex, substance abuse, reckless driving, binge eating).
Suicidal behavior or self-injury
Varied or random mood swings
Constant feelings of worthlessness or sadness
Problems with anger, including frequent loss of temper or physical fights
Stress-related paranoia or loss of contact with reality
source: [x]
i highlighted the criteria that do apply to gale in one way or another in a pretty purple.
i personally believe that it’s rather harmful to equate his relationship with mystra with her being “his fp”. she is a deity, his goddess, and the source of his powers, who is in in full control of the magic he wields.
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gale: mystra commands all magic. salvation, if such a thing exists, is hers to bestow or withhold.
gale has been effectively groomed and conditioned to serve and revere her at every turn since early childhood. imo this comparison really undermines a lot of crucial points in gale’s story that deal with his overall trauma and abuse. after all, you wouldn’t call shar sh*dowhe*rt’s fp either.
gale doesn’t revile mystra, nor does he commit benevolent deeds solely motivated by the secret hope that she will somehow notice and take him back. when you meet gale in the game he has already fully come to terms with the fact that he has been abandoned by mystra with no hope of reconciliation whatsoever. he also had some very fitting lines in ea regarding this topic that i'm sad haven't been repurposed in the full release in some way.
gale: [the tadpoles] don't know that some things are impossible. they don't know that... they don't know. player: what is impossible about what you're being shown? gale: forgiveness. gale: it is mystra i see. and yet it cannot be her. there was a time when i would have believed - but no longer. gale: suffice it to say she would not bestow upon me the favors promised in these dreams. that is how i know they are delusions.
he has already reached the stage of acceptance. moreover, gale only starts to realize that mystra might have been in the wrong for requesting his death once the tadpole squad & tav speak some sense into him. and even then he doesn’t ever show that his emotions regarding mystra are anywhere along those lines. he is instead rightfully angered that she only saw value in his death, after he had been worshipping her loyally for years.
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gale: i worshipped mystra loyally for years, and in that time she granted me the barest sliver of the power i was ready to wield. gale: even with the fate of the world at stake, she had little more to offer me than the means of blowing myself up at a more convenient time. she's done nothing to help us.
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gale: you abandoned me in my hour of greatest need. i had no obligation to help you in yours. gale: because you had no right to ask that of me. you cast me out, remember?
gale doesn’t display rapid changes in mood either. he is a character who is generally very composed and has been known to remain nonchalant even in the face of utter horror. tim downie himself even commented on this once. source: [x]
the only instance i can think of is his sudden switch from resigned-to-death to utter-eye-sparkling-enthusiasm once he spots the crown of karsus. apart from crucial story reasons that i won’t touch upon in this post, i’d also like to add that it’s a rather common phenomenon for people who have just barely survived a suicide attempt to suddenly be filled with zeal and unbridled energy. he doesn't display impulsivity without thorough consideration when it comes to its acquisition either. he considers this a golden opportunity and is positively enthusiastic and elated that this might prove an alternative to him ending up in a cloud of netherese smoke. nonetheless, he knows what he is doing. evident in him actually succeeding in ascending in one of his endings.
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gale: this is no passing whim, trust me. if i can obtain that crown, it will affect us all. it is not a decision i'll take lightly. gale: it's our future that i'm thinking of - we can't rely on anyone else to do it for us. gale: for now - we've learned all we can.
neither are his relationships that we do know of (namely elminster, tara, and morena) frequently changing. they are marked by years of mutual respect, care, and consistency. there is nothing unstable about them. while it's important to note that his relationship with tav is still in its honeymoon stages during the main game, there is no inclination of any push-and-pull dynamic between them whatsoever.
gale isn’t preoccupied with keeping up some sort of benevolent act in order to win (back) affection — he genuinely IS a good person and he proves this at every turn. moreover, to have a tressym become your familiar you must be of Good alignment.
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(taken from tumblr user galedekarios's post.)
there is never a moment where his ideals or alignment suddenly change. in fact, i’d argue that he and wyll are most consistent in this regard when compared to the rest of the companions. gale makes his moral standpoint very clear from the beginning on and also explicitly states that he believes that in order to survive this entire ordeal it would be selfish of him if he wouldn’t be willing to compromise on his morals. this isn’t a sudden bout of ✨muahahaha wizard hubris✨ that he barely contained to hold in before, this is yet another act of selflessness — it is what he’s willing to do for the group and subsequently, the welfare of faerun.
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player: i love unsavoury things. don't feel guilty on my account. gale: that's good to know. although i should say i do what i do out of a sense of utility and pragmatism, not a love of the unsavoury. gale: we're up against the greatest threat faerun has ever faced. i don't mind getting my hands dirty if it gives us a better chance of surviving. gale: whatever advantage i can gain for us. i will. and i refuse to feel guilty for it, no matter how much mystra's chidings might echo in my skull.
this is him, once again trying to be useful in whatever way he can. to give them an advantage, a slither of hope against seemingly impossible odds, so they might make it out of this in one piece. gale wouldn’t approve of those actions under normal circumstances, but their predicament is as far from any definition of “normal” as it can get.
gale is no fool, he realizes this is essentially about survival. he knows that he has no option left other than to tolerate, which is why he can be convinced to not immediately depart tav’s company even if they choose to commit atrocities. this is no character flaw of his or him displaying a previously dormant openness for cruelty, this is about recognizing the necessity.
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player: you don't stand a chance alone. you're free to go. i dare you. gale: gods damn you - you're right. few things are more powerful than the will to live.
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gale: i thought the orb to be the greatest of my sins, but i see now that there are darker depths to which i might yet sink. you may be content to sink into that abyss, but i assure you - i am not.
gale doesn’t lead a split existence. he has a very strong sense of identity. he knows what he wants, what he doesn’t want and he isn’t shy in expressing his boundaries either. which he has especially shown when it comes to his relationship with tav. i originally had intended to touch upon this in another post entirely but: i firmly believe his entire Gale of Waterdeep™ persona is more of a performance than him struggling to find a sense of identity and trying them on for size. it is an intentional decision to separate gale dekarios from the great wizard of waterdeep, to create distance and make sure his family name remains untarnished in case things should ever go sideways.
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gale: i agree. and on the plus side, if i get myself into any truly cataclysmic straits during the remainder of our journey, my family name will go untarnished.
there is also a deep-rooted feeling of unworthiness and his firm belief that love and praise are conditional resources that he will only be granted through his talents alone, naturally. presenting himself as gale dekarios, the man, would mean highlighting his shortcomings and very human flaws, while distracting from the aspects of himself that are deemed praiseworthy, the ones that actually matter: his magical prowess.
i personally believe that part of the beauty of gale’s story is him realizing just how “little” it takes for him to be truly content. he gets his happy ending, with someone at his side who truly sees him, understands him and unabashedly commits to him. they worship and adore him in return — and it is well deserved. he isn’t reduced to be constantly and restlessly searching for some unattainable ideal to fill the gaping void within himself. he doesn’t secretly thirst for more power still or believes that in being with tav he is settling for something. instead, he is finally happy to just be. be and be accepted. teaching a class of unruly wizards and coming home to his spouse each day already fulfills him.
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gale: that's how i feel with you - content. it's a rather unfamiliar feeling, i must say. not something gale of waterdeep ever craved.
even if he doesn’t pursue a romance with tav, he reaches a realization of “oh, it appears i am not irredeemably flawed and only able to reach true redemption through my own death. what i needed was actually with me all along.” throughout their journey and through his friend's support. i think that’s a very powerful and comforting message. he is very well capable of finding peace within himself.
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devnotes: his default state is that he returned to waterdeep and became a professor of illusory magic at his former school, blackstaff academy. general vibe here is that this is a gale who's found peace with himself - he's a great teacher, one his students are mostly in awe of.
to repeat myself: sharing your headcanons is all in good fun, nor should you ever be discouraged from doing so. this is your personal tumblr experience, after all. but i personally think we should be mindful of unintentionally perpetuating negative stereotypes, such as narcissism being a general indicator or being deemed a classic depiction of bpd. i think we can all agree that the continuous longing for acceptance, connection, praise, and approval is something we all have in common deep down, regardless of whatever disorder we may have. [insert victoria justice meme here]
gale may be many things to many people, but he is no entitled narcissist.
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zeb-z · 3 months
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me when my attempts to tear down a system that is built off of violence and grabs for power stem from a place of disgust and overwhelming guilt despite my best intentions and instead continue to perpetuate the cycle of violence in a bloody attempt to instate peace
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mars-ipan · 2 months
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danganronpa is so fucking crazy bc it’s like “hi. this is a game series with a fucking amazing premise. unfortunately the writing sucks and is bad and you will spend half the time going ‘eugh why did they write that’ but you will play the whole thing anyways and get attached to your favorite characters and cry when they inevitably die. also it is filled with romance subplots that will stay in your brain forever” HUH??????
#marzi speaks#like. dr sucks but i like it.#but it sucks#but then like. there’s just??? so much in-depth romance and it makes me want to cry???#like. like. thh. asahina + sakura (so sorry lesbians i do not know their ship name). they are so cute and then they are so tragic#and ishimondo. GODDDDD ishimondo. you get to go ‘oh HELL yeah’ for a chapter and then they make you HURT#even like. makoto w/sayaka. start of the betrayal girlfriend trend. love it#and even toko and togami are interesting!!! like they will not date and should not date but they are fascinating#and then sdr2. do not get me STARTED on komahina what sort of psychosexual freudian bullshit are they on i will never know#but there’s also like. hinanami who r SO good. and mahiru and hiyoko who. tbh i wish they were handled better but still#fuyupeko. they make me crazy. and their parallels to akane and nekomaru. aaaa#SONDAM oh my goddd. they’re so#i may not be a v3 fan but they DID give us a lesbian love triangle and i do have to thank them for that#also the best polycule in the world in the form of the workout trio#kokichi i don’t like. but i DO like his little crush on shuichi even if i think it’s one-sided#kiibouruma will forever be real to me tho. world’s worst polycule. for balance#anyways why does dr have so many good romance plots. they’re so. why are those so good#AND WHY ARE LIKE HALF OF THEM QUEER. WHY DOES THE HOMOPHOBIA GAME HAVE SO MUCH QUEER CODING#idk i’m insane. <3 i’m a little crazy. komahina what the hell even are you….
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stizzysupremacy · 5 months
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arbitrarycategories · 22 days
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what if I indulged my inner twelve year old and wrote crossover fanfiction
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azacello · 1 year
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no bc they rlly got me with that “do you remember what he did to you? I was there” bc up to this point no one has been genuine about the abuse. They’ve used it in power plays, in weird psychosexual soliloquies, everytime someone else’s experience of abuse has been brought up it’s been transactional. Say sorry because you neglected Connor, feel an emotion because you hit Roman. But stewy… man! It was just this one last Hail Mary to get Kendal OUT. And the only way kendal knew how to respond to probably the only non-transactional ‘normal people’ exposition of abuse was trying to get his own transaction to go through while offering nothing in return because stewy showed his hand and Kendall knew he wanted Nothing but Him.
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lemondropletters · 6 months
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hmmm…something something mysterious benedict society x alice in wonderland au…hmm hmm
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unnerving-presence · 9 months
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unpopular opinion i think but i’m sad they didn’t stick with the cold, calculating, but calm wesker. it honestly just doesn’t fit him seeing him get impulsively angry at shit he wouldn’t have gotten angry at in re4 or uc
like he’s this character who has really deep lore and trauma, who has seen the worst of the worst, does bad shit, but is also calm and quick to think of solutions when things go wrong
in his newer iterations it just feels like that part of him is gone? like he just kinda gets angry (ahem re5) and we never really see his quick thinking. it almost feels like he’s so dedicating to his plan he doesn’t want to think of other options and it feels like he doesn’t. sure, you could argue that he’s a lil more crazy in re5, but 3 years ago that fucker didn’t beat around spencer despite him using him his entire life. but all of a sudden when it comes to uroboros he wants to get all cocky and just let his guards do all the work which clearly doesn’t work.
if this were like.. any other wesker iteration he would’ve thought to maybe.. i don’t know, do something smarter instead of letting all his soldiers die? wesker took down an entire umbrella base in russia by himself to get all of umbrella’s files but all of a sudden he’s too lazy to kill 2 people who he could impale in a second when they clearly threaten his plans? is he stupid? yeah probably lol
bring back smart wesker i’m tired of him being stupid aka typical comic villain in re5 :[
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silentgrim · 2 months
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the fact that you have to thank someone for being nice these days because post pandemic aggression is overtaking
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lesbiansanemi · 4 months
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I hate working with men
#have a male coworker who has been doing his job HORRENDOUSLY wrong#to the point that everyone else is having to take HOURS of their shifts to fix what he’s fucked up#and APPRENTLY several of my coworkers have tried to talk to him about it and correct him#and he’s been getting so goddamn offended and butthurt over it and acting like he’s not doing anything wrong#(and this is important the ppl who have tried talking to him are all older women. one in her 40s one in her 50s and one in her 60s)#ONE OF WHOM IS OUR DEPARTMENT MANAGER#and I was bitching about him today#and one of them was like ‘well maybe you should try correcting him’#and I was like why 1. not my job I’m not a manager but 2. he’s not listened to anyone else why would he listen to me#and she was like ‘well it will feel less threatening from you less like he’s getting scolded by a mom so he might take it better’#and like. HM! WELL!#I know this is a crazy wild absolutely batshit suggestion#but when a man gets told what to do/corrected by women (who have all been doing this job SIGNIFICANTLY longer)#and his reaction to is to act like a little fucking disrespectful piss baby#WE JUST WRITE HIM UP LIKE WE WOULD ANYONE ELSE INSTEAD OF TRY TO APPEAL TO HIS FWAGIL TEENY TINY EGO#LIKE IDK SEEMS LIKE THE NORMAL COURSE OF ACTION TO ME?????#not make the androgynous goth bitch in their 20s try to correct him cuz I’m SOMEHOW less threatening#I’m read as a woman he’s gonna have the same damn reaction#I just. ugh. UGH#I fucking hate men#kaz rambles
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wild-mangonada · 2 years
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Listen, i have nothing against the man by the name of Joe Alwyn. I’m sure he’s great. But when tiktokers edited that part in Delicate when Taylor goes “Say my name and everything just stops” and they added Joe Alwyn saying “Taylor” afterward with THE most bored tone and diction of all time, i swear i cackled like a hyena. That man sounded like the physical representation of the color beige, the manilla folder of Taylor’s alleged lovers, not as interesting as the default settings, and they was calling it hot?!?!?????!??!??!??!??!!?!?? Talking bout I understand now why she loves him 😩😩😩????????? Huh????????????????????????
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moophinz · 7 months
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Y8 Thoughts I Guess 🤔
I keep pacing the kitchen while repeating the same things in my head over and over again so here is my thought vomit. Long vent post incoming
• Really concerned about how likely it is that we’ll only see the Jimas interact with Kiryu one or two times in a similar manner to 6. It’ll feel even worse this time for me considering Kiryu has cancer. It’ll also be a grievance for me given something I’ve complained about a lot. How weird they are about Kiryu and Majima’s relationship. It feels like ever since the ending of 3, they haven’t allowed them much of any interaction while simultaneously making a point that they’re close to each other even with the distance and it throws me for a loop every time. It’s made even more frustrating that their social medias have no problem posting about them (especially from Majima’s angle) as though they’re an actual ship. Plus, recently sharing blatant Kazumaji art on stream. If they keep doing that after this game I’m going to catapult myself to the sun. Obviously, I never expected the ship to actually happen. All I want is for their bizzaro relationship to have some sort of proper conclusion, but I have zero hope of that. It just makes no sense to keep making them out to be besties of some sort and then not allowing any follow through on that. Hell, they were weird in Ishin, too. It’s just SUCH a strange thing to do so often.
•At this point, it feels like the Jimas are only together because no one knows what else to do with them so they just end up together for years and years. My issue here is that it puts all of them on the back burner even though there’s still stuff missing about them. Like the biggest one being that we never get to see the real Daigo. They tell us about him a lot, but we never get to see him. RGGO of course bridges this gap. It’s just disappointing to know that’ll only ever exist there.
•If Mine is back (Yokoyama talked like the only thing stopping him from that was his voice actor), would he interact with Daigo? He was such a core part of his character, and it’d be interesting if they did see each other again. I would of course like it if Mine got to tell Daigo that he loved him straight to his face even though I’m more than certain they’d never do that.
•The Ichiban and Saeko proposal and all that still has me on edge. I do N O T know what all that’s about. Yokoyama claimed the game isn’t romantic, but he’s been on a kick lately with saying one thing and the exact opposite happening so I’m feeling pretty hesitant to believe him. I admittedly have a very hard time with media that contains a prominent pairing that I do not care about, but the plot keeps pushing in my face. Like with the second Kiryu saga game. To expand on Ichiban and Saeko, I mean that in 7, there’s nothing to show they have anything romantically going on despite the player’s ability to choose to date her or any other lady. I made sure to date nobody in my playthrough since I don’t care about that kind of stuff personally. They do, however, keep teasing Saeko and Nanba in a subtle way that really surprised me. I did find it interesting since visually they’re a really unexpected pairing and a possible romance that doesn’t involve the lead character seems pretty rare. RGG also typically isn’t that good at writing romantic notes so it was another surprise for me. All in all, this is just a personal issue I have pretty often with romance in media.
I know the game is still months away, and I’m not jumping to any conclusions. Just voicing a few concerns and one thing that’s sort of me hoping for something. It’s going to be a long wait to have all my questions answered 💀
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sapphicdib · 7 months
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dateko · 7 months
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if me and gojo are both entp… who’s driving the plane..
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