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#you have a time lord impersonating another time lord impersonating a normal guy who may or may not have actually existed in the whoniverse
idkaguyorsomething · 6 months
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the convoluted doctor who lore gets extra funny when you realize that, at two separate points in the past, two different companions to two different doctors ended up running into rasputin but both came to the conclusion that he was a pretty nice and normal guy. which, depending on how you interpret the power of the doctor, is either a nice subversion of a lot of tropes of stories used in pre-soviet russia, or side-splittingly hilarious as you start imagining the master getting roped into various adventures with different versions of the doctor that he can’t fuck with yet or else he’ll destroy the timeline, forcing him to play nice with the humans as part of his 4D Time Chess Master Disguise Plan #3852
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antman-56 · 4 years
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The Long Night Pt. 22
BEEP BEEP BEEP
That sound was starting to get annoying but the only good thing about it was it telling the whole world that Taiyang was still alive. Raven was seating next to him, reading aloud and drinking tea.
Raven (chuckling) : I’m pretty sure this part would have made you laugh. It’s about a bard that can’t keep it in his pants and Geralt saves him by telling the lord that the bard was kicked in the balls by an ox.
Tai remained motionless. He had been for almost a month. Their were times he made a sound of discomfort or joy and one time he opened his eyes, blinked and then passed out again. 
Nurse : Um Miss Branwen, visiting hours end in 10 minutes. But if you like we can let you stay for half an hour more.
Raven : The 10 is fine, thank you.
Raven went back to reading. As the nurse left she heard her say that the kid was lucky to have such a caring girlfriend. 
If only they knew the truth.
Raven got up from her seat and gave Tai a kiss on his forehead.
Raven (whispering) : Wake up soon. I love you.
Raven left the medical wing and was now on her way to the dorm. She was thinking about the homework she still had to do and determining if it was worth it.
She was outside the medical wings doors when she texted Summer :
*Raven :Hey heading home
*Summer : K and could u go to the store and pick up milk
*Summer : ill pay u back
*Raven :Fine 
After a couple of minutes of walking she noticed she was being followed by a group of men, maybe 4 or 5. They were good if it took her this long, she blamed the teachers for the homework. She had no weapons on her and they were behind the cafeteria far away from the residential dorms were located. She began to walk faster and staying in the light. She was beginning to panic, if they were TRBO, JACB, BLAD, or all of them then she was screwed. 
She started looking around to find a pole, a rock, anything to use as a weapon. Then she saw the convenience store was just up ahead and ran for it.
When she was at the door she turned around out of breath and ready to scream. She didn’t see any of them. She went inside the store and took out her scroll.
*Raven : Hey can u send qrow over with Omen
*Summer : Y
*Raven : Some guys r following me and right now in store
*Summer : Stay put well be their fast
Raven stayed in the store and began browsing and occasionally turning towards the window to see if they were still their. And was scared when she saw a silhouette of a man. 
***Next Day***
Raven and Summer were walking towards their class while Qrow stayed in. His class wasn’t for another 2 hours.
Summer : Do you have any idea who it could have been?
Raven : Maybe TRBO, JACB, BLAD or a mix of them? I don’t know! I just ran.
Raven hated to admit it but she felt weak right then and there. If she had Omen with her she would have ran at them without hesitation or remorse. 
Summer saw the look on Raven’s face. Frustrated, angry, ashamed, and worse of all afraid.
Summer (stops and puts her hands on Raven’s shoulders) : Hey, anyone in your situation would have ran. Their is no reason to feel ashamed about it.
Raven : Summer, I was weak.
Summer : Were all weak. When we are around the people we care about, we are at our most strongest. That’s why were Huntresses.
Raven stayed silent. The last time she was with Tai he was holding his head and screaming. They were weak, SHE was weak even around the man she loved. And for the other reason, well Summer would change her mind if she knew.
Raven (taking hands off her shoulders) : Anyway, changing subject. Anything new with Qrow?
Summer : Well I asked him to smell my new conditioner and for his opinion.
Raven : Aside from that being a wired way to flirt, were you in a towel and fresh out the shower or clothed and dry when you went to him?
Summer (slight blush) : Clothed.
Raven : Well did you get close close or close?
Summer (blushing and quickly) : I got close enough to hear his heartbeat explode.
As the girls kept chatting about Operation : Dumbass they were being observed from the rooftops.
Freya (sitting at the edge) : Why are we doing this again?
An Mai (holding binoculars) : James told us to follow her. He believes their is a mole in our group.
Freya :  Hey I’ve kept my mouth shut. I owe Willow everything I have. And Summer is probably the nicest person we have ever met from Beacon. 
An Mai : I agree, but if we do have a mole we have to take every precaution otherwise Tesla wins.
Freya : She let me braid her hair. That’s a sacred trust. And are you sure no one can see us?
An Mai semblance is blend. She can camouflage herself and her immediate area if she is calm. 
An Mai : Yes, i’m sure. I mean I was able to get past Casey Lee Williams backstage security.
Freya : Best! Day! Ever! But what dose Jimmy think she’ll do?
An Mai : Don’t know, that’s why we need to watch her and her team.
Freya (pouting) : Doesn’t mean we have to like it.
An Mai : Agreed.
***BLAD Dorm***
Clothes were being thrown out of a closet and a tail was popping out of it. 
Alvin : No, not this one. No, that needs to be washed. No for obvious reasons. Guys, I need help!
Damien (laughing at the antics) : Glad your admitting it.
Alvin got out of the closet and glared at Damien.
Ben (annoyed) : Get your tail out of my face!
Lenny : Guys how does this make me look? Flashy and bold or dashing and daring?
Ben : Don’t care. 
Alvin : Guys!!
Everyone turned to him.
Alvin (exhausted) : I want to ask out that girl.
Lenny : I would go with her friend. 
Lenny put his hands hovering over his chest. Trying to imitate Raven’s breasts.
Damien : She’s taken by the blonde guy.
Alvin : Plus she’s mean. The small girl,  She’s nice.
Ben : She trapped you in a mine and blew it up!
Alvin :Still her voice!! It was angelic~
Lenny :He is right. Beauties come in all sizes, big or small. I’ll help you. 
Lenny rushed over to him and took out his measuring tape.
Lenny (Edna Mode impersonation)  : First off darling you lack the pazazz in your look. Your plain and boring and the tail, was so last year.
He playfully pulled it and Alvin went stiff.
Alvin : Hands off the tail!
Lenny : My bad! But in all seriousness you need -
Damien : Muscle! (pushes Lenny aside and makes a pose) That’s what all chicks want. Come with me to the gym and get on my program and I promise you after 3 weeks every girl will want you.
Ben : What he needs is confidence. Be funny and stuff around her. Chicks love the romantic crap movies show. 
Lenny : What no he needs to be unique not some muscle brain jackass or some beta male nonsense.
Damien : Muscled jackass!?
Ben : At least the girls I come home with don’t regret it the morning after!
Lenny : You want to fucking GO!!
Alvin : Can I p-
BL_D : NO!!!
Alvin walked to the window and watched the campus ignoring the fight right behind him and daydreaming about a possible future with a beautiful girl with silver eyes.
Imagining a nice house on a hill, a litter of children with silver eyes and with different faunus features from fluffy tails and ears to looking almost normal. Them going to a local community center to sing as a family, taking on huntsmen missions as a couple and maybe family. He just stared at the window with a smile.
Damien was holding Lenny up in the air and was about to choke slam him. He had Ben in one arm wrapped around his neck to hold him in place. 
RING RING RING
Alvin snapped out of his dream and turned to the source.
Ben : Let me go.
Damien dropped Lenny on the floor and let go of Ben.
Ben walked to the scroll and picked it up.
Ben : Miller speaking, Turbo whats the problem? 
Lenny and Damien were looking at Ben and hearing him say “Okay” or “I got it”. He hung up the phone and used his semblance.
Ben (interanlly) : We got a two problems.
The rest of team BLAD ran to get notes books and pencils. 
((/// * is writing and   I   for Ben is using his semblance))
*Lenny : What?
Ben (  I  ) : We lost our only sponsor.
That spooked the team.
Damien (yelled)  : WHAT!!
Ben : Quiet!
*Lenny : HOW?
*Damien : Butch was our one and only sponsor. What do you mean he’s gone.
Ben (  I  ) : Something happened and now he lost control of his territory.
*Alvin : Alright, whats the other problem?
Ben (exhaled,   I   ) : The KTs are gone. All of them were found dead in an alley and the survivors were just found near the border. 
Ben looked away from the group, especially Lenny, not able to meet their gaze. 
Lenny (  I  ) : How?!
Ben (  I  ) : Crucified and burned. It had the True Sons of Icarus name all over it. 
*Alvin : So, the gangs dead.
*Lenny : No! WE are alive and we’ll get our revenge!
He said the last part with a sinister tone. 
*Damien : Well lets go pay the Sons a visit.
Ben (  I  ) : Not yet. They have about 60 guys maybe more.
*Lenny : Then what?!
Ben (  I  ) : They’ re at war with The West Triads, The Wolf Pack, Samedi’s Prophets and The Lost Kingz. Their all fighting over Butch’s territory and JACB is gonna help us take them out if we help secure Butch’s territory after he kicks the bucket.
*Damien : So, we kill whoever wins and if the Sons, win its two birds with one stone. 
Ben (  I  ) : And Tesla said he would be our sponsor if we do this.
*Damien : How?
Ben (  I  ) : Well two teams are graduating and one spot is open for us.
*Alvin : I don’t know about this, what happens if a White Fang show up again? 
*Lenny : They won’t. Police Chief Mann made it almost impossible for them to protest legally and if they do. Cops are allowed to use force.
Ben : So, its decided. Get some rest and Alvin go up to her and ask her out. Maybe she likes you too.
Alvin nodded and went outside to test his luck. Tonight was the night.
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phinnsyreads · 4 years
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The Last Man
It’s day 50 of freeze-dried beef stroganoff. Doctor Beckett swallows the meat and rice with a grimace. He’s made a challenge out of it, seeing how long he can eat the same meal without cracking. This is probably as far as he’ll go with this dish, beating his previous record with the chicken curry. At least if he stops here, he’ll have plenty of the beef left to break up the nutrient paste and vitamin pills, once the rest of the prepackaged meals run out.
I’m not looking forward to that day when I find this swill a treat, he thinks.
He looks out of the porthole, imagining the ventilation fans as a breeze blowing across the lunar plain. Not for the first time, he wishes he had tried to smuggle in just one pack of cigarettes. It wouldn’t have done any harm, in the end. Werner would have lost his mind if he’d found out, though.
Werney, the sour-faced, stuck-up bastard. Of all the people to be shot into space with, the O5s had to send me with Site 19’s tie-on-casual-Fridays Werney, the guy who thinks putting sugar in his cereal is the height of adventure. Maybe it’s for the best he went off. Living together, one of us would have by now.
Not a word. Not even an I’m-just-going-out-and-may-be-some-time. You didn’t even shake my fucking hand before you left.
God damn you, Werney.
Beckett thinks back to that day a few months ago, seeing Doctor Werner walking through the craters, heading towards the horizon. Opening a radio channel. “Hey, Werney, where are you going?”
The last words of Man. “Hey, Werney, where are you going?” Jesus Christ.
You didn’t have to explain yourself, or say something deep and meaningful. Hell, “Goodbye” would have been deep and meaningful enough for anyone. I’d have been satisfied with that.
If I’d gone after you, would you have come back?
No, you wouldn’t have come back. That’s why I didn’t say anything else.
God damn you, you bastard.
It was ironic, that gloomy, unsmiling Doctor Werner was the first one to snap, because in the end, it was because he was the positive one. He was the optimist. He believed the briefing from the O5s, that they were to get ready for the next wave of staff, the pioneers of New Humanity rising from the ashes. Even when they both knew no more shuttles were coming, he still thought the Foundation had something up its sleeve, that some portal would appear and the O5s would pop out to give them medals and take them back to the world as it was before.
I guess the day he walked out was when he knew we were the last ones left. I’m still here because, in the end, I was less hopeful than sour old Werney. What was the point of hoping, after they launched LEGIONNAIRE?
Beckett thinks back to the day when everything changed, when it started ascending from the gases of Jupiter. The President on television with the Overseers beside him, the wailing in the streets. The day he told Adrienne where he really worked.
And then, the miracles. Watching LEGIONNAIRE’s first test launch. Jimmy Kimmel making electromagnetic pulse jokes. His nieces and nephews, drawing crayon pictures of rockets and explosions and arguing about which missile was the best. The Pope leading the faithful in prayer to the world’s nuclear bombs in St Peter’s Square, the Lord’s angels made metal.
An end to wars. An end to pointless squabbles and petty politics. All the negative energies of mankind turned to purpose, with an outside threat so faceless, so impersonal, that all vitriol and hatred directed towards it became noble.
Most of the job involved disgust, fear, and at best, grim satisfaction, if things were well done. But those few months – I was proud of the Foundation. I was proud to say I worked there. I was proud to be a human being.
Maybe that was worth it.
Maybe I should be grateful to Werney. Now I can say I’m the last man on the moon. The anti-Armstrong to your anti-Aldrin. One small step for a man, one giant end for mankind.
Another half-remembered memory, of a bright-eyed graduating class at MIT, as Aldrin walks in, telling America’s newest engineers about dreaming and boldly going, cheers and screams from the crowd drowning out any substance of the speech. Shoving past friends and holding out a pen and scrap of paper, the prize following him to Boeing, Cape Canaveral and Site 19. Now returned to dust, like everything else. Suddenly, Beckett has an idea, and heads to the base storerooms.
It’s not like I have anything better to do.
...
A few hours later, the rover is loaded with supplies, and peels out of the garage, the door silently sliding closed behind it. A set of footprints trails into the distance, but the rover bounces in the opposite direction.
He dreams of the first time he went into space, and the last time. Armstrong, Aldrin and Collins are with him. Armstrong, Aldrin, Collins, Beckett, Werner. The last manned mission to the moon. The last mission anywhere.
The rover comes to a stop, the beep of the autopilot waking Beckett from his slumber. He straps on his helmet, tapping the seals. The airlock opens with a hiss, and he bounds down the stairs. The lander is in front of him, flag standing stiffly at attention beside it. Beckett runs a glove over its metal legs, so awkward-looking to modern eyes. His hand comes to rest over Aldrin’s signature.
Did you ever think something like this would happen, Mr Aldrin?
If you’d gone ten years earlier, would it have changed anything?
What if you’d never gone at all?
Beckett suddenly feels weary, and begins to wonder why he came. He stands there, imagining the Stars and Stripes fluttering and the anthem playing, until his oxygen warning begins to sound, beneath a black sky and brown Earth.
He sleeps again on the journey back, dreaming of drawings of da Vinci’s flying machines, Florentine streets, chapel ceilings, drinking red wine with Adrienne.
...
When he returns, it’s one o’clock in the morning, Greenwich Mean Time. He’s missed his daily call, not that it makes a difference any more. Still, it’s best to keep to routines in this place. He boots up the base computer, cycling through the Sites. The live – well, one-second-delayed-live- camera feeds are still active, and he wonders why he needs to see the pictures as he calls, as if they were placed there by a mocking tormentor. Beckett brings up Site 19. The entrance guard tower has collapsed on top of the central building, and it looks like the cafeteria is now gone. The sky is a swirling, roaring mass of dust and sulfur, masonry and debris bouncing past like tumbleweeds, the leftovers of the human race.
Same ol’, same ol’.
He taps the transmitter button.
THIS IS AN AUTOMATED MESSAGE FROM SITE NINETEEN. WE HAVE A CATEGORY ONE SITEWIDE FAILURE. CONTACT ALTERNATE COMMAND FOR ORDERS.
Hello, Site 19. Hello, overseers. Still not coming to get me, yeah?
Maybe Werney stepped into that portal and found his way back there. Maybe he finally found his sense of humour, and messed with the computer before he left. Everything’s back to normal there, and everyone’s sitting in the cafeteria right now, preparing my surprise party.
Werney, can you hear me? I know you can hear me, you bastard. Go back into that portal and come back here right now, you hear me? I want you back here.
“Werney, you bastard, I want you back,” Beckett mutters. “O5s, you can come here too, you hear me? You’ve got some explaining to do, and I don’t give a shit how much more you get paid or what super powers you have.”
THIS IS AN AUTOMATED MESSAGE FROM SITE NINETEEN. WE HAVE A CATEGORY ONE SITEWIDE FAILURE. CONTACT ALTERNATE COMMAND FOR ORDERS.
“I want fucking Werner and the Overseers!” Beckett shouts.
THIS IS AN AUTOMATED MESSAGE FROM SITE NINETEEN. WE HAVE A CATEGORY ONE SITEWIDE FAILURE. CONTACT ALTERNATE COMMAND FOR ORDERS.
“I want my old job back! I want my desk and my office!”
THIS IS AN AUTOMATED MESSAGE FROM SITE NINETEEN. WE HAVE A CATEGORY ONE SITEWIDE FAILURE. CONTACT ALTERNATE COMMAND FOR ORDERS.
“I want my house and my car and – and my lawnmower! You can buy me a new fucking lawnmower! I want to see my brother and mom and dad! I want Adrienne back! I want a bottle of wine to drink with her, I want to see Italy again, I want – I want to see a real fucking ocean again! Not a fucking moon ocean, a real one, with real fucking water!”
THIS IS AN AUTOMATED MESSAGE FROM SITE NINETEEN. WE HAVE A CATEGORY ONE SITEWIDE FAILURE. CONTACT ALTERNATE COMMAND FOR ORDERS.
Beckett slumps over the computer console, shaking with sobs.
“I want to turn on a TV and – and – and – see you say Legionnaire worked, it blew up that alien piece of shit, and it’s not the end of the world any more, it’s just es-see-pea two-three-nine-nine, it’s neutral – neutra – neutralized, and we sent that thing to hell.”
“I want my fucking world back.”
RECEIVING TRANSMISSION.
Beckett sits bolt upright, and grasps the seat armrest to steady himself.
NEW VIDEO FEED ACTIVE.
A colossal mass of alien machinery is on screen, hovering amidst the roiling atmosphere, covered in scorch marks from a thousand atomic blasts.
He falls back into the chair. Not his miraculous deliverance, just the ever-fickle voice-recognition software.
RECEIVING TRANSMISSION.
Another surge of adrenaline lurches him forward. With trembling hands, he presses the transmitter button.
All primary systems destroyed: Mission aborted All primary systems destroyed: Mission aborted All primary systems destroyed: Mission aborted
There is nobody around who can tell if the last man on the Moon is laughing or crying.
===
[The voice of the Doctor Beckett was provided by @iridethedirt.]
===
[Enjoy the podcast? Consider supporting us on Patreon! Patrons get access to bonus Joke episodes, outtakes, and can even request episodes on specific SCP objects.]
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snugglyporos · 4 years
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So I can’t help but think that the Persona games are trying as hard as they possibly can to get away from the thing they’re a spinoff of. Which may explain why the nonsense in each game gets further and further away. Like, it feels like it was made by two different people putting it together. Example:
Persona 1: Guy #1: what if demons invaded an people had to fight them using things called personas? Guy #2: and then they fight god, right? 
Persona 2: Guy #1: what if rumors changed reality?  Guy #2: and then they fight god, right?
Persona 3:  Guy #1: what if there was an extra secret hour that only some people could see? Guy #2: and then they fight god, right?
Persona 4: Guy #1: what if there was a secret world inside the tv and the heroes had to solve a serial murder case? Guy #2: and then they fight god, right?
Persona 5: Guy #1: What if a group of heroes changed the hearts of bad people who the law couldn’t or wouldn’t touch to right wrongs? Guy #2: And then they fight god, right?
If none of the divine stuff makes any sense, it’s because it’s a holdover from the SMT games, which are themselves a spinoff of the Megami Tensei games, which are themselves based on a book series in the 1980′s. A very, very weird book series. A book series whose plot is... uh... this:
In Jusho High School, there is a divide among the student body; those of the gifted side and those of the normal side. Students in the gifted class are normally exceedingly intelligent, while those in the normal class tend to be academic under-achievers.
Akemi Nakajima, of the school's gifted class and a computer genius, is assaulted by Hiroyuki Kondo of the normal class under the orders of Kyoko Takamizawa, who had been angered by Nakajima rejecting her romantic advances. Kyoko had told Kondo that Nakajima had been flirting with her rather than the other way around, prompting the attack.
The normal students were rarely punished for their actions against other students out of fear and pity on the part of faculty. Battered and bloody, Nakajima comes home and decides to finish his Demon Summoning Program, a work in progress of his, to exact revenge. He discovers that his computer is not powerful enough to use the program, so he must use the school's Computer Aided Instruction (CAI) room's host computer.
Sneaking into the school at night, Nakajima draws a pentagram in the computer room and attempts to run the program, but is found by Professor Iida. Nakajima has a tense conversation with the professor, who becomes afraid of him, but he is able to run the program regardless. Nakajima commands the program to kill Kondo and Kyoko, which causes a tremor in the school but otherwise appears to not work.
A week later while Professor Iida is teaching a computer class in the CAI room with Nakajima and Kyoko present. Suddenly a voice resounds from the host computer. A demon, Loki, trapped inside the host computer, uses the monitors in the CAI room to hypnotize the entire class except Nakajima, Kyoko and Professor Iida. The demon follows Nakajima's request and commands the hypnotized students to kill Kyoko. They then lure Hiroyuki Kondo,into the room and kill him as well. Professor Iida is also killed in the chaos, which upsets Nakajima somewhat: Loki had followed the program's command, but Nakajima had not specified any restrictions.
Drunk with power, Nakajima at first begins to comply with Loki's request for female sacrifices, offering him his female professor, Ohara, who proceeds to be metaphysically assaulted by Loki through the use of a helmet-like contraption connected to the summoning program. Permanently damaged by the encounter, Ohara eventually becomes Loki's loyal servant and helps Loki assume physical form in the human world through Nakajima's program as well as her own connection to the demon.
Nakajima meets Yumiko Shirasagi during this time, a newly-transferred student with whom he feels a strange connection to. Unbeknownst to him, she had witnessed the bizarre encounter with Ohara and Loki, but had dismissed it as illusion and trickery. Eventually, the demon demands that Nakajima offer him Yumiko, which Nakajima refuses to do. He then advises Yumiko to stay away from the school in an attempt to save her. That night, Yumiko ignores Nakajima's advice and returns to the school, prompting the attention of Loki. Nakajima attempts to regain control of Loki, but the demon mocks Nakajima's attempts to command him.
Loki summons himself into the physical world through the CAI room computer and goes on a killing spree, free from Nakajima's control. Jealous of Yumiko, Ohara attacks and wounds her. Nakajima summons a benign, loyal demon, Cerberus, to help him battle Loki, to no avail. During the battle, Yumiko is possessed by Izanami, of whom Yumiko is a reincarnation, and burns Loki with her powers. In addition to dealing with Cerberus, Loki is distracted enough so that Yumiko and Nakajima can escape through a dimensional warp to Asuka created by Izanami, although Loki succeeds in fatally wounding Yumiko as she flees.
Still influenced by Izanami, Yumiko tells Nakajima that she will die, but could be revived if her body is brought to Izanami's tomb. Yumiko dies, but with the help of Cerberus, Nakajima complies with her dying request and travels to the Shirasagi Mount, where he meets Yomotsu-Shikome, a loyal servant of Izanami's.
Yomotsu-Shikome provides Nakajima with two mystical spheres, and guides him onward. With Ohara's help, Loki is able to follow them to Asuka and Shirasagi Mount, where he kills Yomotsu-Shikome. Izanami meets Nakajima and Yumiko in the tomb, but she is attacked by Loki before the resurrection can take place. Nakajima summons Cerberus to help, but his companion is also no match for Loki, and is defeated. Desperate, Nakajima uses the two spheres that Yomotu-Shikome gave him, which ignite the pomade-covered floor of the tomb, summoning Hinokagutsuchi, who in turn transforms into a powerful, mystical fire sword, with which Nakajima is at last able to kill Loki. Izanami succeeds in reviving Yumiko, but keeps her with her, stating that Yumiko has great hidden powers within her with which they could battle evil.
Meanwhile, Ohara, impregnated by Loki, attempts to communicate with him, not knowing that he has perished. This makes her accidentally contact the demon Seth.
Basically, it’s a bunch of insane nonsense that makes no god damned sense. But someone took a look at this, and went ‘you know, this looks like a good thing to make into a game series!’ Also, that’s the plot of book one. There are many others. 
But in case you thought I was exaggerating how nonsensical and weird the SMT series started, here’s a brief synopsis of the first SMT’s first chapter: 
The news of demonic invasion soon gets out, however, and the American military, led by Ambassador Thorman, declares martial law in Tokyo as they try to get rid of the demons. A reactionary Japanese militia force, led by Gotou, rallies against the cordoning imposed by the Americans and they begin working with the demons, whom they see as the ancient spirits of the land sent to create a utopia, to prevent the Americans from destroying Tokyo. A third resistance faction, led by the Heroine, seeks to keep the Americans and the reactionary Japanese forces from clashing and getting Tokyo caught in the middle. The party meets the Heroine, whom turns out to be the sacrificial woman from their collective dream. Despite their efforts, she is captured by Gotou's forces and Yuriko appears to personally oversee her public execution, claiming that once she is gone, Yuriko can be with the Protagonist eternally.
The Protagonist can choose to align himself with any of the three factions, but no matter what, the Heroine will be rescued and join his side, the two forces will clash, and Ambassador Thorman - the deity/demon Thor in disguise - will launch nuclear missiles on Tokyo, destroying nearly everything. The Protagonist, the Law Hero, and the Chaos Hero only survive thanks to the sacrifice of the Heroine, who sends them to the Diamond Realm, another plane of reality, with her magic.
So for those of you keeping track, the plot is that Thor, impersonating an american ambassador, nukes tokyo, while one of our protagonists is executed by a woman claiming she wants to own our main protagonist, because that woman is actually Lilith. It’s nonsense. 
Anyway, it ends like this: 
After defeating Asura Lord at the behest of Law, Michael at the request of Chaos, or both to restore the balance, the Protagonist is teleported to the roof of the Cathedral above the clouds. A Chaos-aligned Protagonist is congratulated by Louis Cyphre, who reveals his true form as Lucifer and vows to lead the world into a golden age of freedom. On the Law path a messenger of God welcomes the Protagonist, and tasks him with preaching God's word so that all mankind may be welcomed into the Thousand-Year Kingdom. A Neutral Protagonist is greeted by the figure of Taishang Laojun, a being of balance, who thanks him for his efforts on behalf of the universe, and urges that the hero build a new future for mankind, "built by neither reliance on God nor demons, but by the hands of people themselves."
For those keeping track, it turns out that this was all a fight between god and lucifer over the world. So if you’re wondering why at the end of Persona 5, the protagonist becomes Lucifer and fights God, it’s because they’re referencing the chaos ending of SMT1. 
Something that does not at all fit with the rest of the game, nor does it fit with anything else. It just sorta comes out of nowhere. Honestly, you’d never understand that ending unless you bothered to play games from 1992. Which I imagine most people haven’t. 
Honestly, I keep thinking that the persona games are written by sane people and then there’s a room with the original creators and they just keep having to appease them by putting their insane nonsense in the game. 
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afterspark-podcast · 4 years
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G1 Episode 24: Transcript
Episode Show Notes
[This can also be found on AO3!]
[Stinger]
O: --Or Solus took a rib from Solus and genetically engineered his wife.
S: [laughing in the background]
[Intro Music]
O: Hello, and welcome to the Afterspark Podcast!  An episode by episode recap of the Generation 1 Transformers cartoon.  I'm Owls!
S: And I'm Specs.
O: And today we're gonna be talking about episode number 24, “A Prime Problem.”  Let's talk about giant robots today, shall we?
S: Um-hmm.  And today we open with the Decepticons next to a freshly created glowing ravine.
O: They had apparently detected some sort of rare energy on their sensors.
S: Starscream, is completely ready to dive in headfirst, but Megatron stops him, as he cites that the energy could be unstable.
O: Once bitten, twice shy, eh, Megs?
S: [sighs] Megatron's decided he cares about his subordinates today.
O: [laughs]
S: The Decepticons apparently have a- kind of an equivalent of Roller, called an Autoscout.
O: This is actually kind of fascinating to me.  Not only because the name, ‘Autoscout,’ sounds like it should be an Autobot thing, but also because this is another cassette that Soundwave sends out, that's weirdly colored like Rumble for some inexplicable reason.  But I like that the normal cassettes like Ravage, um, Rumble, Frenzy. etc, they're all considered valuable enough they aren't used for shit like this.
S: The scout descends into the ravine, revealing that the energy is coming from some very large crystals, while Megatron, Soundwave, and Starscream, you know, exposition things.
O: Yeah, I know, it actually was a reasonably good usage of you know, like, the audio and the visual storytelling.  Uh, these things are Korlonium- okay, so, I looked it up this thing has an ‘R’ in it but I swear to god they sound- it sounds like they're saying ‘Colonium’ crystals…
S: It could just be an accent thing.
O: So, these things are Korlonium crystals, apparently?
S: Megatron says that they're deadly, and then the scout blows up upon contact with it.
O: You know, right on time.  Starscream suggests luring the Autobots into the crystals to destroy them, but Megatron says that Optimus would never be so reckless.
S: Well, I mean the  real and I'm gonna emphasize REAL here-
O: [laughs]
S: -real Optimus wouldn't.
O: And then Megatron had a terrible, awful idea.
S: Megatron decides to wait in his new, temporary base until the Autobots show up.
O: It's a giant rock.  I know it's supposed to look like a mountain, but guys it's a ROCK.
S: And then we see the Autobots arrived with Spike in tow.
O: Oh good, I'm glad we brought the human to this weird energy source that's probably giving him cancer as we speak.
S: Do the robots even know what cancer is?
O: Uhh, good question! [laughs]
S: Then again, who knows if any of this is any more hazardous than the Ark on a normal day, let alone sitting in Bumblebee who may or may not be radiating who knows what.
O: Or- or being anywhere near- near Wheeljack?
S: Yeah.
O: And thus, Cliffjumper attempts to do what he does best, jumping off a cliff and into the crystals.
S: Well, I mean he has to live up to the prophecy that is his name, because it's a self-fulfilling prophecy.
O: Indeed.
S: But Optimus advises caution, before Starscream shows up with several other Cons. Starscream here is super creative with his insults to Optimus.  Calling him Floptimus.
O: Why does that sound like a dick joke?  Better yet, why are you using a dick joke on Optimus?  Your boss is the one that turns into a phallic object.
S: He's jealous of their, um, relationship.
O: Obviously.  A fight breaks out, with Optimus almost immediately taking out the three Seekers.
S: He just dismisses them as opponents, while loudly declaring how bored he is to only be fighting three Decepticons.  And then Megatron has Soundwave reject Laserbeak to take out Optimus.
O: May one bird do what three Jets could not.
S: Upon seeing Laserbeak Optimus calls him a ‘tinfoil turkey’.
O: The bastard, be nice to my birb!
S: But Laserbeak shoots Optimus down a convenient adjacent ravine, free of electronic frying crystals.
O: Megatron then orders Laserbeak to take holographic scans of Optimus’s body, from  every  angle.  Megatron holds a perfect replica of Optimus Prime for  reasons.
S: And... Megatron also wants Optimus alive.
O: Oh lord, he wants a harem.
S: Maybe?
B: [laughs]
S: While Laserbeak is scanning Optimus, Megatron calls him um, photogenic.
O: Optimus is knocked out, ass up, and SOMEHOW that's photogenic!?!  Megs, buddy, NOOO!!!
S: [sighs]  A mere few button pushes later and Megatron now has an exact copy of Optimus Prime.
O: It fools Soundwave.  I have absolutely no idea why, it's not like Soundwave wasn't watching the monitors with the real Optimus on them at the same time is Megs.  He saw Laserbeak scan him!
S: To make this even sillier, Soundwave’s basically psychic.  Actually, I'm kind of wondering if he's performing surprise for Megatron's benefit.
O: Why though!?!  He shouldn't be surprised here! [dissolves into laughter]
S: Yes, but maybe it makes Megatron feel better to have his ego stroked?
O: I would believe that.
S: It's just to guess.  Megatron proudly proclaims that it's a clone.
O: We gonna talk about how Megs just uh, had this all ready to go or…?
S: I don’t know, it's the plot of the week.
O: Plot of the week, he’s got plans for it, I mean whatever...
S: He's just making use of stuff he already had.
O: [snorts]
S: He then puts on a silly helmet, that is of course purple, and now he can control everything the clone says or does.
O: Clone Optimus heads out to meet up with the Autobots.  The Cons retreat, and the Autobots head back to base.
S: Meanwhile, the real Optimus, who has apparently been left unsupervised, wakes up and climbs out of the ravine he was trapped in.  And at the Ark, Megatron apparently doesn't know anyone's name as he has the clone calling Ironhide, ‘Bumblebee’.
O: I really wish they got a bit farther with this gag.  Either having Megatron trying to impersonate Optimus Prime's voice or have Optimus try to have more of Megatron’s speech pattern.  Like, now I'm just wondering has anybody ever asked the two VA’s to do that? Because I would pay good money to see that! [laughs]
S: I'm kind of wondering how Megatron- how they don't have any goddamn information on any of like, their- the opposing faction because he should know.
O: He clearly know who Bumblebee is, in earlier episode.  That's the part that makes this make less sense.
S: Yeah. So, I mean, you think, you've been fighting a war against them, they're- like, their roster doesn't really change.
O: Yeah.
S: You’d think you'd know who the hell they are, if only so that you can properly you know, combat them.
O: Yeah, pretty much.
S: And yeah, Megatron also has absolutely no idea how to operate Teletraan I, despite the fact that he's had operatives going in and operating it and getting shit out of it, for how long?
O: At least a year.  The Autobots express worry about their leader but the clone uses the fall as an excuse for his ‘faulty memory’.
S: This seems like it would be a good reason for you know, Ratchet to open him up but apparently he's identical inside and out, through and through.
O: YUP, we’ll get to that! [laughs]
S: Yeah, and then the real Optimus shows up and the clone orders the others to shoot him.  But Ironhide stops them. Wanting to verify which one is the real one.
O: Which obviously the second one's the right one, because he doesn't even notice the other Optimus at first.  He's too busy expressing how happy he is that everyone made it back safe.
S: [sighs] The real Optimus.  Bumblebee has Teletraan I scan the two Optimi, but they come up as exactly the same.
O: [deadpan] Oh gee, if only sparks existed. [returns to speaking normally] I mean I’d assume that one of them wouldn't have one, right?
S: Well if it -if it did it would have weird implications for you know, their reproduction.
O: Uh, it has weird implications period, considering sparks are canonically a thing here, retroactively, by way of Beast Wars.
S: Yeah.
O: So, you know, that's the thing.  Apparently, we're going to do a series of tests to see which is the real Optimus out of these two.  Uh, the first of which is laser rifle skills.
S: Really guys, all you need to do is see which one knows how to use the damn computer.
O: [snorts] It's so true.  To make this dumber though, I'm not even sure which one is which in these scenes.
S: I'm not sure anyone is.
O: [laughs] The animators didn't know either!  The writers didn't know either! I believe it.
S: And instead of doing something sensible, like asking them questions, they decide to make the two Primes do a truck race next.  Oh, GODDDD-
O: Shockingly, these tests are inconclusive!
S: [sighs] But the Autobots have more important things to worry about.  The Korlonium crystals are about to explode and they've got to stop it!
O: This is apparently all going according to Megatron's plan, as the Cons are messing with Teletraan’s readings to lure the Autobots back to the crevice. Wait, one moment, he just said he didn't know how to use Teletraan but they know how to fool the fucking scanners?
S: I guess they can manipulate what Teletraan’s sensors are getting?  I don't know.
O: I suppose that's more likely.
S: Cuz I mean, Soundwave could probably do that.
O: Okay, I believe Soundwave could do that.
S: Megatron, Megatron, no.  Soundwave, probably yeah. Maybe Starscream could do something?  But apparently, he didn't know what the fuck they were so… I don't know.  Megatron is saying this while wearing the control helmet so does that mean the clone is saying all this shit out loud, as well?
O: Please, yes lord, please! [laughs]
S: I mean that would blow the cover like, really fast but apparent- unless everyone was super dumb, which I mean they are...
O: I MEAN, they do not have a good track record in this episode, let's be honest.
S: Sadly that would not appear to be the case, uh, with regard to talking out loud via clone.  Uh, when we get back to the Autobots, they are just about getting ready to roll out. But Ironhide tells the two Primes that until they're sorted out, he's the one giving orders around here.
O: So, still Peter Cullen? [laughs]
S: [laughing] Yes!
O: Peter Cullen does one other voice in this series regularly, it's Ironhide.  I do find this funny. When the Autobots arrive they are attacked by the Decepticons.
S: Megatron plans to have the clone order the Autobots into the deadly, deadly crystals, and of course the- in order to gain their trust he'll have to destroy one of the Cons.
O: Starscream doesn't just walk into this, he- he falls flat on his face into it.
S: [sighs] He swan dives.
O: [laughs]
S: Starscream is like, “I, Starscream!?!  The pride of the Cybertronian war academy!?!”
O: “This aft?  This aft, right here?  You want to offline this aft?”
S: And Starscream, you know, runs away, and flies out of the hideout, like a coward.
O: [snorts] I don't know if I really blame him, in all fairness.
S: True, I mean, considering how much he and Megatron fight, and how- how many times Megatron's probably told him he's gonna kill him and everything.
O: And vice versa. Megatron has Soundwave send Laserbeak after him.
S: While all this is going on, Spike and Windcharger find the entrance to the hidden base.
O: For being half Starscream's height, Laserbeak actually makes pretty quick work of him and just hauls him back into the base.
S: I am pretty sure Laserbeak is significantly smaller than Starscream, unless he was like mass shifted up here.
O: I- I don't know, I feel like when we saw it, it looked about half- like he was about half as tall or something but-
S: I don’t know, it’s- it’s weird.
O: -hell if I know.
S: Once Starscream’s dumped back in front of Megatron, Megatron says he intends to have the Optimus clone kill Starscream's clone, not Starscream himself.  This is important information that was left out.
O: And this is what you get for dicking around with people Megs, a squishy infestation.
S: Of course, once Starscream's been ah, cloned he sees something he finally loves more than himself, his clone!
O: Starscream gets his own dumb helmet to control his clone too!
S: Same hat!
O: [laughs] Spike and Windcharger attempt to get out after hearing Megatron's plan, but they are chased by Laserbeak.
S: Spike is, you know, captured accordingly and ah, Windcharger falls to his apparent doom.
O: Into the crystals, like, I feel that’s relevant.
S: Yeah.
O: Uh, Soundwave is now babysitting the squishy.
S: Spike calls Megatron a, ‘Mega-rat’.
O: Just once- just once I'd like to hear these idiots say an actual zinger.
S: Back outside, the two clones face off one-on-one, mano a mano.  With Megatron congratulating himself on being a  brilliant  playwright for choreographing all this nonsense.
O: All I can think is just see- see, you let him write shitty plays, this war wouldn’t have happened!
S: Oh god, hes’ doing- he’s pulling a Loki from-
O: [cracking up] OH MY GOD, that's the fic we want and deserve!  Is Megatron wins, and all he does is put on shi- is put on shitty plays!  Headcanon accepted.
S: Self-aggrandizing plays and poetry.
O: Mm-hmm!  And then Optimus kills Starscream in cold blood, in front of a bunch of witnesses.
S: Oh boy, are they gonna feel super silly when Starscream shows up in five minutes.
O: Five minutes I think you mean immediately!?!
S: As the wind is blowing the dust of Starscream's clone away, um, Starscream still standing there, in the shot, with the two other seekers.
O: [laughs] So animation error, but in all seriousness, Megatron and Starscream actually work really, really well together here.  Proving they can do it if they try!
S: Um-hmm.
O: The Autobots are dumb, dumb, dumb, mothafuckers, reaching the conclusion that this has to be the  real Prime, because he killed Megatron's second-in-command.
S: Would the real Optimus kill Starscream in cold blood?  I think we've established that, no he the fuck wouldn't.
O: He can't even kill Megatron in cold blood most continuities.
S: Yeah.
O: Clone Optimus orders the bots into the crevice and the real one tries to stop them, but no one listens to him.
S: You're all so DUMB!  So, so DUMB!!! Why didn't you ask about prior experiences that you would have had with him!?!
O: Because that would make too much sense! [laughs]
S: [sighs]  Why? So much sighing...
O: [laughs]
S: Windcharger proceeds to drive up out of the crevice and is like, “Hey guys.  Don't fucking go in there!”
O: [laughs] I wanna point out that he survived because he apparently transformed into his alt mode before hitting the ground.  I don't know why that helped, because clearly that doesn't seem to help- because the Scout still blew up and it had wheels, but whatever.
S: It might not have had rubber tires, that’s the thing.
O: Hmm, okay.
S: Cuz, I think it's specified that the rubber tires somehow insulated him?
O: You know, this is- this is like, on par with them defeating uh, what's-his-face’s lightning in that other episode by being in car mode, but sure!
S: Yeah, the clone attempts to get everyone ah, into the crevice again, but finally fucks up enough that the other Bots catch on.  And it's when he calls Spike, ‘unimportant’.
O: Megatron was so close, he just lost his patience, man.
S: The Autobots finally turn on the clone sending him into the crystal crevice.
O: The Decepticons are blasting off again, and as they make their escape they just chuck Spike out a window.
S: Powerglide proceeds to show up, um, and showboats that rescue.  Spike should really be dead at this point.
O: Critical velocity and all that, because while Powerglide was showing off they got really close to the ground with that catch.
S: Yeah, and even if Spike er, Skydive-Sky-
O: Skydive?  [laughs]
S: Wrong- I mean right season, wrong flying Autobot.
O: [continues laughing]
S: Ah, even if Powerglide managed to like, match velocities with him- yeah, but still- he'd still splat-
O: Yup.
S: -unfortunately for him.  Um, back on the ground, Spike asks Optimus if it's really him and uh, then Optimus offers a rather silly response, but it’s- you know, it's cute.
O: “Yes Spike.  This time I am definitely me... or I.  Myself. Oh, whoever I am.”
B: [laugh]
O: And that's it for today's episode, join us next time for, “Atlantis, Arise!”  Uhh, so did you guys ever want to see the lost city of Atlantis with giant robots, jets underwater, and um... Washington DC?
S: Megatron takes over um-
O: A lot of things.
S: -Lincoln’s chair.
O: [laughs]
S: Yeah.
O: Megatron finds the  perfect chair.
S: Yep, too bad you can't take it home.
O: [snorts]
S: Okay, we have two- two fanfic recommendations for today.  Would you like to talk about them or would you like me to?
O: Yep, I can do it.  Uh, so, uh basically, I did both of these because I will use any excuse to talk about Shattered Glass.  (I apologize for nothing!) So, our two fics for today, uh, the first one is, “Mathematical Manipulation” by Merfilly.  The continuity is Shattered Glass, it’s G, it’s Gen there are no pairings. Characters are: Megatron, Starscream, Soundwave, Shockwave, Frenzy, Optimus Prime, Rodimus Prime, and Thundercracker.  That is all of the Shattered Glass versions and in summary, “Megatron doesn't see the future, he just models it on probability.” The character or a rec this is based on is, ‘evil Optimus,’ and it's a one-shot.  Also, this makes more sense when you realize that Shattered Glass Megs is a math professor.
S: Which is indeed a fun thing.
O: Which I love immensely!  And our second one is, “Someone You Might Have Been,” by Astolot.  It's G1/Shattered Glass, it's rated T, it's definitely slash, uh, for Megatron/Optimus and our characters are: Shattered Glass Megatron, regular Megatron and Optimus.  The- in summary, “I didn't love him because he wasn't you.” And the character theme this is based on is again, ‘evil Optimus,’ but also Megatron and Optimus slash. It is a one shot.  It's also one of the only Astolot fics I can recommend, so I was like, we're gonna put that here! [Because we’ve been trying to keep all the fic recs at T and below for the most part. ~Owls]  And that's it for our fics today.
S: And that just about wraps it up for us today.  Remember to check us out on Tumblr or Pillowfort as a Afterspark-Podcast for any additional information, show notes, or links we may have mentioned.  You can also find us on Facebook and Twitter @AftersparkPod (all one word), and various other locations by searching for, “Afterspark Podcast,” such as AO3, iTunes, Google Podcasts, Stitcher, and Youtube, just to name a few.  Until next time, I'm Specs.
O: And I'm Owls.
S: Toodles!
[Outro Music]
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bannerswife · 7 years
Text
A Promise - Destiel
Title: A Promise
Pairing: Dean x Cas
Word Count: 2106
Warnings: Fluff :3
Summary: After a witch hunt Dean gets turned back into his 5 year old self and says some stuff to Cas that reveals some things that the normal Dean would never say which may need some clearing up when he returns to his normal self.
Authors Note: Yes this is terrible forgive me. But omg my last post got so many notes and I just wanted to thank u guys sm! <3
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It had it of course been yet another exhausting hunt for the Winchesters. This time facing a witch which had gone south. Just seconds before Dean killed her she cursed him with something no one would of saw coming. Turning Dean to his old five year old self. Thankfully the witch was killed, whether dean was 5 or 32 it didn't matter, he still lifted the gun and shot her.
Sam unlocked the motel room slumping onto his bed, Dean following tail, his little legs carrying himself inside. His clothes were way too big for his now little body so they trailed behind him making him trip nearly every step. Dean balled his fists as he rubbed his little eyes which was soon followed by a big yawn.
"I'm tired sammm. Can you tuck me in?" Dean said dragging out the 'm' in his brother's name.
Sam sighed looking back at his brother still not getting used to the sight.
"Dean I'm sure you can put yourself to bed. Just because you're in your 5 year old self doesn't mean I'm gonna treat you as a 5 year old." Sam said sluggishly as he pulled himself off the bed to head into the shower.
Though Sam did feel a little bad at what he said. His brother was still mentally himself right? I mean dean did shoot the witch when he was changed. And in the drive back to the motel they were both having an adult conversation. Dean still... Dean. Thinking and speaking just like he would. Just the tone in his voice then, it truly did sound like a toddler. Sam shook his head knowing Dean was probably just trying to be funny or whatever.
Dean didn't know why he had wanted sam to tuck him in and his answer made Dean's head and shoulders slump. He just wanted someone to stop the nightmares. Yes there's Sam but he doesn't feel as close to him anymore. Ever since Dean had gotten back from hell he had been non stop nightmares every night. Of course it scared Dean, but now it scared Dean to the point where he wants someone to sleep with him so they can comfort him. So he can listen to their steady heart rhythm, their warm breathe hitting Dean's neck, it too in a rhythm, to feel as though he's safe.
He was just craving some love- affection. Someone who won't ever leave him. Who he knows he can always trust, no matter what.
Again sammy was always there for him but he too has left. Dad left. Mom left. Cassie left. Castiel-
"Dean." He heard the familiar gravelled voice from the corner of the room.
Castiel is yet to leave Dean, just like everyone.
His face lit up, his little green eyes glowing, as his body straightened. In a flash Dean was hugging cas', his little chubby cheeks squished into the angels legs.
"Cas you're here! I missed you so much! Cassiel? Can I ask you a queshtion" Dean let go of Castiel to look up into the blue eyed man. His little mouth not able to pronounce some words right.
"I'm sensing a witch did this to you," The angel said, cocking his head to the side examining the happy little boy.
Dean in fact was happy, happier than Cas had ever seen him before. His hair now a lot blonder and longer which covered most of his forehead. His cheeks were a light blush of red, his eyes a bright green brighter than ever and his little lips still plump as ever, that just looked adorable on the boy.
"Yeah! Sammy and I, we were like 'Bang! Bang! Die! Die! And then we got into daddy's car and we were like brrmmm brrmmm!" The green eyed boy said darting across the room shaping his hands into guns and impersonating the sound of the Chevy.
Never did Castiel, Angel of the Lord, smile. Never has and never really thought he would until he saw Dean. The little hunter speeding around the room playing and demonstrating what had happened. Of course Castiel didn't really understand much afterwards as it was jumble talk but it made him smile.
"And yes, what was your question Dean?" He brought up again, intrigued as to what this five year old wanted.
"Can you pwease pinky promise me you won't leave me? Cause I wuv u too much for you to go! You're the best thing that has eva happened to me!" Dean said reaching out grab castiels hand. Castiel frowned at what this boy was questioning him to do but he knew he had to promise Dean one thing.
To never abandon him.
The angel knew dean would have thought about this a lot in his former self but never speaking of it.
It did sadden Castiel that he would think that but he knew he could keep this promise even if he died trying.
This man he raised from perdition meant too much to him and he couldn't dare to loose him in a heart beat. He'd do everything to keep Dean and his brother safe.
And even if he hadn't been around humans for too long he knew exactly how he felt for Dean. It was different then what he felt with Sam or Bobby, they were his friends. But with Dean there was such a strong feeling he couldn't ever explain it.
The little boys hand slipped into Castiel's, Dean's green eyes piercing through Castiel's.
"I promise you, Dean Winchester, I'll never leave you for as long as I am here." Castiel softly smiled and Dean's little finger wrapped around the angels.
Not long after Sam came out of the foggy bathroom, warm steam rushing out as he opened the door. His shaggy brown hair dripping in water onto his clothes as he walked out.
"Thank god Cas you're here, mind helping me out on this one?" Sam said, smiling as he pointed at his brother.
Castiel nodded as he watched Dean look up at his now older brother.
"So for now Dean has been pretty much Dean you know- speaking, thinking like him-"
"Not anymore." Castiel interrupted him.
"What?" Sam frowned in confusion.
"He's starting to become the five year old he once was. I heard that you killed the witch so as I can tell- Dean should be back to his old body in a month."
"Why can't you just change him back now?" Sam snapped.
"Because it's out of my power."
"You're an angel-"
"Yes and with a curse that strong, made by a powerful witch, I'm afraid I can't do anything about it Sam." Castiel could see that dean was getting unsettled by the conflict in the room so gingerly he picked the boy up and rested him upon his hips.
With his times in the park watching the humans interact with their young he remembered seeing a distressed toddler crying after she tripped over. Her mother quickly picked her up and placed her onto her hips where she comforted her daughter saying that she was alright. So that's what Castiel decided to do.
"It's okay Dean." Dean looked up at Castiel, a soft little smile escaping from the little boys lips. Not long after the angel too was smiling. And Dean's smile grew even wider.
Sam watched the two, watching Dean's smile grow. He had never seen Dean smile ever like that before. It was a smile full of security and a sense of hope.
Dean wrapped his little arms around castiels firm body, the boys head digging into his trench coat.
Heavier and heavier Dean's eyelids got as he listened to Castiels pulse against his chest. His head bobbing up and down as Castiel took in and out a breathe.
And not long after, Dean's eyelids finally closed over.
Carefully and slowly Castiel walked over to Dean's bed. Gigantic compared to Dean's little frame making him look even more innocent. Castiel covered Dean with the motel sheets looking again over his face showing nothing but peacefulness.
And with the touch of Castiel's finger on Dean's forehead he made sure Dean was to have a beautiful dream.
Nothing but of him and Dean together, painting, going to the park, eating ice cream, watching the bees.
"He seems so peaceful." Sam finally spoke up, Castiel looked back at him totally forgetting his presence.
"Yeah. He does. Look after him for me Sam," Before Sam could even respond, Castiel was gone.
Sam was woken up by the feeling of someone pulling his eyeballs open. And of course they were.
"Sammmm wake up wake up wake up!!" He heard the little voice of Dean call out to him.
Sam opened his eyes only to come face to face with his brother.
"Go back to sleep buddy, cmon." Sam ushered him by the flick of his arm but of course Dean was up and he wasn't going to go back to sleep any time soon.
"No I wanna go to the park! I wanna see Cassiel there!" The way Dean said the angels name made sam smile at how cute it sounded. It was just too adorable.
Sam slowly got up rubbing his eyes and stretching his arms out wide.
"Have you prayed to him?"
"No I waited for you to get up!" Dean smiled and Sam noticed that the little green eyed boy was still in his over sized clothes.
"Well before we go out anywhere we need to get you changed and get some food." Sam implied heading towards the bathroom to do his normal morning routine.
"Can I please have peanut butter samich please! An I want all the crusts cut off too like what mommy used to do!" Dean jumped up and down around Sam excited at the day to come.
"Is this going to be a long month or what?"
Slowly but surely the month went by and Dean was finally in his old body. He remembered everything that had happened and he couldn't believe what he had said to Castiel that night. It made him flush in embarrassment, how could he ever face the angel now?
"Dean," The sudden gruff voice from behind made dean jump.
"Dammit Cas, you honestly gotta stop doing that man!"
"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to startle you. I just wanted to make sure that the witch's spell had worn off and thankfully it has,"
"Yeah, look about the other night," Castiel watched Dean, he knew Dean will struggle next with what he was about to say.
"I- I don't even know where to start," Dean chuckled to himself rubbing a hand over his stubbled chin.
He couldn't do it. He can't. But he had to. He needed to tell the angel how he felt.
"You can tell me anything Dean, you know that," Castiel said, his blue eyes looking deeply into Dean's.
"I guess what I'm trying to say is that- you know what? Never mind, it's stupid. Thanks for checking on me but you can go now Cas," As Dean went to turn around to head out of the motel room Castiel grabbed his wrist and pulled him into a firm kiss.
At first Dean's eyes widened in surprise and he didn't know exactly what the hell to do. But he soon fell deep into the kiss and relaxed into it. Slowly Cas pulled away looking at Dean's surprised face.
"Wow," Dean rubbed at his soft plump lips.
"I may not be human but I still have the capacity to feel. And what I've felt for you, Dean, I cannot ever explain. It's a feeling I'm yet not used to and don't think ever will. It's such a strong emotion," Castiel explained, his eyes not leaving Dean's.
Dean only nodded his head, his eyes tracing down to his feet. He still couldn't wrap his head at what had just happened.
"I've always had feeling for you Cas, from the moment we met. Though I never wanted to admit it to myself let alone have the guts to tell you. But the thing is I can never be happy, hunters can never be in a relationship. It always ends in blood-"
"We're stronger than others-" Dean shook his head, interrupting him.
"I can't loose you too, Cas. I can't, I won't." Dean's voice cracked as he tried his best to not let his emotions get the best of him.
Suddenly the front door of the motel room swung open to a very tall lean Winchester, with bags hung from his wrists.
He looked between his brother and the angel only to raise an eyebrow in confusion, noticing something was going on between the two.
"Am I interrupting something?"
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ecotone99 · 4 years
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[HM] Abe Froman: Sausage King of Chicago
Logline: We find out why Abe Froman never made his lunch reservation at Chez Quis during Ferris Bueller's Day Off.
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Abe Froman gets chauffeured every morning, by Dino, his driver of 15 years, to his luxurious office on the Magnificent Mile in downtown Chicago. Chicago was his town; he had run the city like a king for over 30 years. That's because he was a king; he was the Sausage King of Chicago. From the very beginning, Abe had created his sausage empire out of nothing, and now they're spanning seven continents, as an Antarctic research station now receives his sausage as well. He was one of the true untouchables of Chicago.
On the morning of June 11th, 1986, Abe arrived at his office and was greeted by his long-time secretary, Paloma Lowry.
"Hey Abe, Freddy Peterson already called twice this morning. Paloma said.
"All right, give him a call and patch it into my office," Abe says as he shuffles past.
"Sure thing, boss," Paloma says.
As Abe opens the door, Freddy's waiting for him; he looks back to Paloma,
"I thought you said he called?" Abe asks.
"He did call twice, but then he also showed up, I got his machine, should I leave a message?" Paloma says as Abe just shuts the door.
As Abe enters his office, he picks up his customary morning sausage,
"Delicious, I could eat sausage all day and all night," Abe says.
"Don't you worry about heart disease?" Freddy asks.
"Worth it, there's a reason why sausage is Jesus backward," Abe says as he has a seat at his desk.
"Alright, Freddy, give me the scoop, what's going on?" Abe asks.
"Profits are down, sales are down, the stock price is down, I think everything is down except your blood pressure," Freddy says.
"What's the problem, sausage is sausage, what's changed?" Abe questions.
"People's tastes are changing, take for instance turkey sausage, tofu sausage, farm-raised sausage," Freddy says.
"Farm-raised? what I look like over here, Ol' McDonald?" Abe sarcastically answers.
"There's some competition in the market," Freddy says.
"That's crazy, I've been the Sausage King of Chicago for 30 years now, no one can touch me," Abe boasts.
"I would say that your number one threat, are the Sausage Brothers out of Oklahoma, they just built a sausage factory in South Chicago. They offer all these new types of sausage," Freddy says as he turns on their commercial on the television.
The sausage brothers are seen walking on a farm,
"We’re the Sausage Brothers, we've been making sausage in the heartland of Oklahoma for over ten years now. We've perfected our recipe, and guarantee that our sausage flavor will be a familiar yet a unique experience for you," The first sausage brother says.
"Yes, give our sausage a try, we assure you'll want more!" The other sausage brother says.
"Get Sausage Brother's Sausage today, it's sold worldwide in a supermarket near you," the narrator says. The commercial pans to sunset and a jingle plays,
"Sausage Brothers, you can't beat our meat."
"That's what we're up against," Freddy says as he stops the VCR.
"Brothers? Aiming to take out the king, I don't think so, how close is it?" Abe asks.
"Let me put it this way, three years ago, you had them beat by 38% market share, just last week it was down to 12%," Freddy says.
"I want to meet these guys, Paloma!" Abe screams.
"Yes," Paloma says through the intercom.
"Get these sausage cousins from Oklahoma on the phone, I want to have lunch with them today," Abe shouts even though he can use the intercom.
"You want your normal table at Arturo's?" Paloma asks.
"No, I want to put these guys in their place, give me a table for three at the fanciest restaurant you can find," Abe shouts. Paloma searches through her Rolodex,
"I could make a reservation at Chez Quis?" Paloma says.
"Lock it in," Abe says.
The first thing Abe does every morning is join a conference call with the organization called the Royalty of Meats. There was the Sheik of Salami, the Prince of Pastrami, the Viceroy of Veal, the Lord of Lamb Chops, and last but not least, the Archduke of Prosciutto. They supported each other, Abe told them about his Sausage Brother's problem, and they said they would look into it. When Abe gets off the conference call, Abe and Freddy head out.
"Paloma, have Dino bring the car around, I want to do a little recon before our lunch with the Sausage Nephews," Abe says. Abe has Dino take him to the Sausage Brother's, South Chicago, Sausage Factory. They park across the street and look at the comings and goings.
"It just looks like a normal factory to me, nothing out of the ordinary," Freddy says.
"To the untrained eye, remember I cut my teeth on sausage factories, I've never seen one that didn't have a few violations. We have to get in there," Abe says deranged.
They notice that every time a delivery is received, the security guard goes back into his office with the driver, leaving the front door unguarded. They calculate that they have about 30 seconds to sneak into the factory. They wait for the next delivery, and they're in there.
Abe and Freddy find some uniforms and sneak around the strangely clean sausage factory. Not a surface is bloodied; it doesn't even smell like a sausage factory.
"Is this a slaughterhouse or a hospital, I can't even tell," Abe says. They make their way down to the factory floor; sausage is coming off the line,
"This sausage is longer and wider than mine," Abe says concerned.
"It's not about the size of the sausage, and may I add, sir, your sausage is magnificent," Freddy says.
"You're just saying that," Abe says. They walk to another room, and there's cooked sausage coming off the line. Abe can't help himself; he takes one of the sausages and pops it in his mouth.
"Aw, the sausage is like butter in my mouth, this is probably the best sausage I've ever tasted. We're so screwed, it was a nice run, but it's over now," Abe says. Freddy hits a button that reveals the beginning of the production line; they see human bodies on a conveyor belt being dumped into a vat, the Sausage Brothers make their sausage out of humans! Abe tries to wipe the taste off his tongue; he tries to puke, but can't.
"I can't puke up sausage; it's against my religion," Abe says.
"We have to alert the world; Sausage Brothers are people!" Freddy yells. Just as they're about to run away from the factory, both of them are hit over the head and knocked unconscious.
Freddy and Abe wake-up and they're in the Sausage Brother's office, confronted by the brothers themselves and some armed guards.
"Abe Froman, The Sausage King of Chicago, it truly is a pleasure to meet you, your sausage is a pleasure to see," one of the sausage brothers says.
"Yeah, but your sausage is beyond its expiration date, now," the other sausage brother says.
"What are you going to do, kill us? I got lunch reservations, you know," Abe says.
"Yeah, lunch reservations with us," one of the sausage brothers says.
"Oh yeah, well, people are going to be looking for us, you're not gonna make us into some sausage patty," Abe says.
"Sausage patty, for the king, no, no, no, we've got a nice kielbasa planned for you," a sausage brother says. All of a sudden, the Royalty of Meats bust through the door, the Viceroy of Veal punches one of the sausage brothers in the face. The Sheik of salami, using two salami sticks as nunchucks, subdues the two security guards. The Archduke of Prosciutto comes in and delivers a knockout blow to the other sausage brother. The Lord of Lamb Chops and the Prince of Pastrami come in and untie Freddy and Abe.
"How did you know we needed help?" Freddy asks.
"One royalty meat always knows when another is in danger," the Archduke of Prosciutto says.
"Go out, alert the world of the Sausage Brothers truth," the Lord of Lamb Chops says.
"We've got a couple more sausages to make ourselves," the Viceroy of Veal says as he throws one sausage brother on top of another.
Abe and Freddy rush back to Dino, who's waiting in the car. They speed away to alert the media, but traffic is heavy that day,
"What is going on, we haven't moved in a half-hour?" Abe asks Dino.
"There's some type of parade going on," Dino says.
"A parade, in the middle of the week?" Freddy asks.
"I don't know; I guess the script called for a parade," Dino says.
Abe sees a supermarket up ahead,
"I've got to get something to eat, we were supposed to eat an hour ago," Abe says.
He gets out of the car with Freddy and enters the supermarket; they offer samples of the Sausage Brothers sausage at the door, Abe picks up a few and swallows them whole.
"Abe, we just find out that people are in the sausages!" says Freddy.
"That's right; I hope I'm not developing a taste for human flesh," Abe says. They stop the sausage giveaway, screaming throughout the store,
"Sausage Brothers are people; Sausage Brothers are people!" One customer replied,
"Yeah, we know, we saw them in their commercials."
Abe and Freddy are driven out of the store; they wait for another hour and a half in traffic. They pass Chez Quis on the way back. Abe decides to go in to see if they'll honor his reservation from before, but the restaurant calls the police saying he’s attempting to impersonate The Sausage King of Chicago.
They finally get back to Abe's office.
"Oh, it's been a long day, I could really use a day off," says Abe.
"It could be worse, have you heard of this Ferris kid, they say he might die."
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