#yoga hosers
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Yoga Hosers (2016) Dir. Kevin Smith
Lily-Rose Depp | Harley Quinn Smith
#yoga hosers#lily rose depp#harley quinn smith#kevin smith#i’m the man#Colleen Collette#Colleen McKenzie#johnny depp#movies#horror comedy#horror flicks#dark academia#art#lifestyle#core#girlblogging#ootd#coquette#fashion#cottage aesthetic#this is what makes us girls#this is a girlblog#female rage#female manipulator#female hysteria#lizzy grant#light academia#photography#vibes
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Hunter
Austin's character in Yoga hosers (2016)
Not really a fan of the movie tbh
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Austin Butler Best Filmography
Dune: Part Two (2024)
Masters of the Air (TV Mini Series 2024)
The Bikeriders (2023)
Once Upon a Time... in Hollywood (2019)
Elvis (2022)
The Shannara Chronicles (TV Series 2016‑2017)
The Carrie Diaries (TV Series 2013‑2014)
The Dead Don't Die (2019)
The Intruders (2015)
Yoga Hosers (2016)
#austin butler#Dune: Part Two#Masters of the Air#The Bikeriders#Once Upon a Time... in Hollywood#Elvis#The Shannara Chronicles#The Carrie Diaries#The Dead Don't Die#The Intruders#Yoga Hosers
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Yoga Hosers (2016)
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“AAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!! Sorry.” — Austin Butler, 2016.
#icons#yoga hosers#yoga hosers icons#austin butler#austin butler icons#hunter calloway#hunter calloway icons
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@elvisabutler @mesbouquins
#austin butler#austin butler hunter calloway#hunter calloway#yoga hosers#him and that slow entrance lol#josaustingifs
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#male beauty#Tyler Posey#Yoga Hosers#tyler posey edit#yoga hosers edit#actor#film#celebrity#2010s#gif#100+ notes
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youtube
youtube
youtube
youtube
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Sundance 2016
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once again swindling my bf into unknowingly watching yet another austin butler film
this torment on my poor partner was spawned by Jo & her yoga hoser gifs @karamelcoveredolicity
specifically this one (🫠):
i guess you’ll be hearing from his lawyers soon too 🤣
#ash was not involved this time#she is actually innocent for once#austin butler#yoga hosers#pt ??? of annoying my bf w elvis shit lol
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Walrus vs Sausage Nazi
(I thought of this idea bc Wallace wasn't in Yoga Hosers and I'm disappointed.)
Tiny, raggedy breaths wheezednout from a creature that couldn't be seen, even if you heard it, you wouldn't know where to look. Only the curious animals that watched could see the tiny creature, a being that had some human features but their skin was grew and spotted with darker browns, like they were made of sausages.
It was a 'bratzi' as the store clerks had called them, tiny little Nazi soldiers made from bratwurst by a mad scientist. All of it's other brothers had been slaughtered and crushed by humans so easily in the lair beneath the Eh-2-Zed but somehow the straggler managed to escape without notice, stepping through the carnage and blood of it's kind.
And now it was running, running through the thick Canadian undergrowth of the forest. Squirrels and Deer's alike watched this tiny creature run, blinking at it curiously but not never bothering it as it ran. The bratzi didn't even know why it was running anymore, it no longer had a purpose to serve, but it's instincts told it to run, to survive.
It's breath came out in raw, ragged pants for air as it pushed away sharp leaves and sticks, suddenly bursting from the never ending forest of pines and into the warm sunlight. It sucked in a sharp breath and looked around, wondering if any humans were around to crush it, but it was alone, alone except for a building in the distance. Although faint, the bratzi could hear a symphony of different noises, growls and whines and roars of different kinds of animals.
The bratzi was looking at the Manitoba Exotic Animal Sanctuary, even though it didn't know what that was.
Even from far away, the bratzi would pick up the waft of fresh meat and food, it's instincts possessed it to keep moving, it's legs moving on its own as it walked towards the zoo, guided by the smell of meat. It dawdled across the grassy fields, the grass was bright green under the golden halo of the sun. It climbed and pulled it's way through thick hedges, planting it's boots into sand.
Before it was an enclosure of sorts, large gates surrounded the enclosure, keeping whatever was inside, but the enclosure seemed to be desolate.
The sound of something splatting caught it's attention and the bratzi's head snapped to the sound, seeing a fish that had been thrown into the enclosure. Looking up, it saw a zookeeper already walking away on the docks, clearly not staying around for long. The bratzi looked back at the fish and tapped its fingers together in delight, finally some food!
Determined, the small creature wiggled through the bars, racing across the sand towards the fish that awaited to be eaten. It eagerly dug it's fingers into the fish, pulling out chunks of icy meat and stuffing it into it's tiny mouth. It continued to rip out tiny pieces of the fish, as much as it could get it's hands on, juices dribbled down it's sausage like chin as it ate ravenously.
As the bratzi ate, it didn't seem to notice that there were eyes on it, it didn't know there was something else in the enclosure with it and it was eating their food.
A haunting, gutteral growl rumbled from the darkness behind it. The bratzi froze, it's face stuffed with so much fish it's cheeks were puffed out. Slowly, it turned around, swallowing the fish with a comedicly loud gulp.
Behind it was a beast made of human flesh, similar to the monster the bratzi had puppeteered with it's breatheren. Bloodshot brown eyes were narrowed dangerously, it's eyes practically glowing in the sunken shadow around it's eyes, the creature shuffled forward, lips curling back to bare teeth in another growl. The bratzi yelped and stumbled back, using the fish as a barrier between it and the beast, but it didn't seemed phased, circling around the bratzi like a predator cornering it's prey.
The bratzi was the prey.
The bratzi backed away more, nervously looking at the sharp tusks that hung from the creature's jaw like giant fangs. Fear rushed through it's system and it grabbed the fish, shoving it forward as a distraction, but it was ineffective. Instead, the creature begame to lower itself to grown, never taking it's haunting eyes off of the bratzi.
"Scheisse!!" The bratzi screamed, making a run for it. At that same time the creature leapt forward, swinging it's head up and striking. Sharp tusks pierced through the bratzi's chest and dug into the ground.
It's sausage insides slowly leaked out and dripled onto the ground, the walrus lifted it's head but the bratzi stayed impaled on its tusk. An annoyed grunt came from the creature as it shook it's head violently like a dog with a toy until the remains of the sausage thing finally fell off and hit the ground.
The walrus looked down at the bratzi, it couldn't tell whether it was confused or frustrated by the small human. It snorted angrily, looking at the half devoured fish behind it and letting out a disappointed sigh, now it had to wait for the next feeding time, it thought, looking back at the bratzi.
With one last snarl, the walrus stomped it's grotesque flipper on the bratzi, causing it to explode in a spray of yellow and white slop.
#tusk 2014#Yoga Hosers#tusk movie#yogahosersmovie#yogahosers2016#fake ending#except I wish it was real#seriously#I wanted more walrus stuff#fanfic?#idk
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And that’s gonna be so metal
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A couple GIFs from Yoga Hosers
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Just some recent movies. Marrowbone was great. Dunno how I hadn’t heard of it 👀
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YOGA HOSERS- 2016 ⭐️⭐️
With a lot more restraint and a bit better writing, this could have been an ok movie.
Colleen (Harley Quinn Smith) and Colleen (Lily-Rose Depp) are two teenage best friends who work in a canadian convenience store.
There dream of going to a senior party is ruined when there dad (Tony Hale) forces them to work, and to make matters worse Austin Butler wants them both dead....
Movie started ok, a totally mixed bag of jokes that are alright and then some that were totally lame brother. Also couldnt be bothered with the instagram thing that popped up everytime a new character was introduced.
After a while the film gets progressively worse and less funny. After they introduced the little nazi goblins or whatever they were id just about hit breaking point, then Harleys "im not even supposed to he here" line gave me cringe vibes and pushed me over the edge. Turned the damn movie off.
Love a lot of Kevin Smiths early stuff but a lot of more recent films i have a hard time with. Seems like when there is a joke thats ok its run into the ground and even those are few and far between. I think if you replaced some of the awful jokes, took out the nazis and just had them facing off against the satanists in the store it could have been a lot better.
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