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#yes I'm going to try to post not for real now
lorarri · 3 hours
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★ . . . 𝐌𝐄𝐄𝐓 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐅𝐀𝐓𝐇𝐄𝐑 , 𝐉𝐁𝟓
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summary , the daughter of lewis hamilton and a 3 time f1 world champion life is pretty great especially now that you have found a special someone
pairing , jude bellingham x fem! hamilton! redbull! f1 driver! reader
main masterlist | football masterlist
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yourinstagram . 4hrs ago
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seen by lewishamilton judebellingham 76,389,589 others
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yourinstagram
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liked by lewishamilton judebellingham 102,890,199 others
yourinstagram winter break photodump pt. 5
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user my wife is a madrid...I don't know what to do with why self now
user stay away from my wifey mr. hey jude lookin ass
user MR BELLINGHAM WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE
user it couple is cookin ya'll
user love that mother is living her best life
user bae wake up Y/N posted a winter break photo dump
user OKAY BUT THAT LAST PIC EXCUSE ME?!?!?!
user madam who got you those flowers
user jude better be careful or papa hamilton gonna have his head if he even thinks about trying anything with his daughter
user why am I kinda living from the idea of these two being a couple
user are you dating jude?
user Y/N come home the kids miss you
user 4th wdc pending...
user so we all know who the guy in the last slide is right?
user love my soon to be parents
user the queen soft launching wasn't on my 2024 bingo card
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TRENTSKI
JUDITH
EXPLAIN YOUR SELF
JUDITH
huh?
RICE RICE BABY
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did you really think you could sneek your way into Y/N Hamilton's ig dump and we wouldn't find out?
JUDITH
yes?
SANCHOOOO
SO YOU ADMIT IT
IT IS YOU
MEEK MEALS
glad you finally got together
I was getting sick and tired of you talking about her 24/7
JACK RABBIT
I'm surprised he even got the strength to talk to her
STAR BOY
right?
his brain normally turns to mush when ever her name is mentioned
proud of you bro
JUDITH
thx kyo
I always knew you were a real one
TRENTSKI
damn I see how it is then....
RICE RICE BABY
trents going dark lads
in his sad girl era
PHIL CHEESE STAKE
so wait who knows about you 2 being together?
SANCHOOOO
besides the entire intent after that photo dump?
MEEK MEALS
LMFAOOO
STAR BOY
tell lewis he's the goat
JUDITH
hahah funny
let us have our damatic soft launch
obvi you guys know
the only others that know are max, sebastian, and charles
I'll let lewis know when he figures out I'm dating his daughter this Saturday
JACK RABBIT
mate your fucked
TRENTSKI
DAMN
secret forbbiden romance
didn't know you were built like that jude
MEEK MEALS
what do you mean Lewis fucking Hamilton doesn't know you are dating HIS DAUGHTER
SANCHOOOO
pray for jude guys
these might be his last days with us
STAR BOY
he shall be missed
JACK RABBIT
dw jude I'll delete your search history of you stalking Y/N's ig and twitter
JUDITH
thanks guys...
wiss me luck
TRENTSKI
break a leg
RICE RICE BABY
don't die
MEEK MEALS
good luck
SANCHOOOO
you going to die
STAR BOY
what colour coffin do you want?
I'm thinking bright pink and rinestones
JACK RABBIT
do you need a get away driver?
PHIL CHEESE STAKE
before you die get me and ronnie a hat singed by Y/N and Lewis
JUDITH
I feel so loved rn
yourinstagram . 4hrs ago
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seen by lewishamilton maxverstappen1 98,328,479 others
lewishamilton replied to your story!
he's a good lad
but if he hurt's you
winning a trohpy will be the last of his concern
okay dad I'll relay that message to him
good
also don't forget to use projection...
DAD OMG STOP
carlossainz55 replied to your story!
¡HALA MADRID!
maxverstappen1 replied to your story!
Christian is asking if Jude wants to come to the team dinner before the livery launch?
also if he hurts you I will run him over with our matching aston martins
landonorris replied to your story!
what does he smell like?
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cbrownjc · 2 days
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Absolutely love your speculations and thoughts.
What do you think Raglan James' plans of doing since he made contact with Daniel? He didn't only talk to him in that sushi clip, but apparently he brought him with him somewhere (That clip where Raglan says "The great conversion is real")
I know that there's the whole body thief going around, but wouldn't that have to do with David and Lestat? Do you think they're going to bodyswap Daniel with that young (indian? i don't remember well ahah) boy, taking David's place? Because why else would he be talking to him
Thank you have an amazing day
Hello! Glad to hear you like my thoughts! 😌
So okay, I gave a lot of my thoughts about Raglan James in this post. I don't think David is going to be on the show. I think part of his character has been worked into Daniel's story, and David's character has been cut.
Now, that said, I'm actually not sure if Daniel is going to get the Body Thief plotline . . . or, I guess I should say, I don't think the story from the book is going to happen one-to-one in the show. Because I don't think Raglan James is going to steal a younger body before he makes the offer to Lestat to switch. And that is why the character is being played by Justin Kirk. Because, in some later season, Kirk is going to be playing Lestat.
Because, as I noted in the link above, I do not think this show is going to have a bunch of white men swapping around the body of a young man of color. Plus, Rolin Jones has already talked about how tricky body-switching plots can be. The book version of the story had three people swapping around. Right now, I think they are going to streamline things down to just two people -- James and Lestat.
Okay so, as to the preview for ep 2x03, well. I think what happened with Daniel toward the end of 2x02 is setting the stage for Daniel to contact or make contact with the Talamasca. I don't know if the Talamasca made contact with him before Daniel came to Dubai or will do so while Daniel is there already. But I think Raglan James will make some type of promise or deal with Daniel to make sure he'll leave Dubai unharmed or something if he gets info for them, particularly about the Great Conversion thing.
However -- I also wouldn't be surprised if Raglan James has already been kicked out of the Talamasca at this point, and is just acting on his own.
Anyway, I think the show is about to set up a 3-ep mini-arc in that people will wonder if Daniel is "betraying" Louis and Armand in some way, or if Louis and/or Armand really are going to kill Daniel or something and that the Talamasca really are trying to help Daniel or something.
And then, I think something that is revealed in Episode 2x05 will have Daniel feeling different about things again. And, if he's made some kind of deal with Raglan James, (thinking it was a deal made with the whole Talamasca), Daniel will back out of it either at the end of Episode 2x05 or the opening of Episode 2x06.
So yeah, I think Raglan James is here for a little mini-arc and will try and use Daniel to get info about the "Great Conversion" -- either for the Talamasca or just for himself and whatever plans he might have about it.
Now, as for if I think Daniel will get swapped into another body at all? Yes, I do think he will. But I don't think they'll have a new actor cast in the part of Daniel when they do it because . . . the show already has two actors playing that part. And there are other ways characters in the VC series have obtained a new body beyond just switching with another person.
But I don't think such a plotline is going to happen any time soon. This is something I really don't expect to see until just right before the Great Conversion storyline is about to kick into gear which, IMO, won't really begin until around Season 4 or the beginning of Season 5.
I hope that answers your question and have a pleasant day too!
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goblin-dogs · 1 year
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We're at a sighthound event at a cute boutique hotel and she's enjoying her window seat to watch her greyhound friends walk by
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blazingblorbos · 1 month
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oh god. oh god. oh.. oh gosh. I didn't expect this so soon. I didn't expect this today, I've been busy with life related things so the HYV calendar is really unbeknownst to me, is this update really next week already?? where can I rant about this- whERe can I rant about this-
oh. I made a blog for that exact purpose ! OKAY—!
fuck. fuck me, dude holy-
FUCK.
the slightly worried look on Arle's face as Snezhevna is reaching out her hand, only for her face to seemingly revert back to cold and neutral once the camera actually focuses in on her. Her tone is cold but her words are reassuring,,,,,,,,
ALSO GOD FUCKING DAMN IT. HOW GENTLY SHE HOLDS HER HAND.
the d o o r. the DOOR. THE FUCKING DOOR, CHAT. the slow opening at first, and once you can make out that it's certainly Arle's silhouette she shoves it fully open - both doors, both hands. incredibly attractive—. the FEAR in that man's eyes.
The crossed hands. We can't see her face but you know what expression she's making (it's not really an expression. it's neutral but you can feel it). THE FUCKING F E A R ON THAT MAN'S FACE.
Oh- she literally just grabbed him by the throat. Just like that- ! There's the expression. Oh, you feel it, alright. If you go frame by frame, you'll notice her eyes narrow in the slightest right before ->
POV: you're getting chocked out by Arlecchino, and that's actually the least of your worries. (my god she is beautiful).
I did not expect him to simply be thrown down to the ground and I ... d i d not expect her to step on his FACE. [insert gay masochistic joke here. you know the one]. Did not expect her to smile (this is the ONLY scene wherein we see her smile even slightly... huh...) *And the reason I say "I did not expect her to smile", is because with the momentum we were getting I thought she was straight up going to crush his throat, or stab him (hand, weapon or otherwise). It looked like she was digging the forefoot of her shoe into the guys head and not the... .. y'know deadly fucking heel, so that.. confused me. (and the sound when she supposedly stomped his head in did NOT sound all that impactful) but ANYWAYS I digress-
I'm of course assuming more happened after the cut to black because . madam where did you get that bloodstain on you—
BLOODSTAIN ON HER FACE!?!?!? (more on this in a second)
Freminet??? Freminet feature ! (not Lyney or Lynette.. interesting). :(((( the poor boy sounds so,, desensitized. His father
holy shit quick intermission. After the mental chronological fuckfest that was "The Song Burning in the Embers" I don't think I can look at Arle and the HotH the same anymore because she's.. she's like not even 10 years older than them (?) it's insane this doesn't make any sense- ANYWAYS.
HIS FATHER comes back with what we later see to be real blood on her face. Tells him "I've acquired new funds". We know what that means... HE knows what that means!!, and the way WE - THE AUDIENCE - know that Freminet knows what it means is because the boy replies "Oh.. Okay.."
LIKE-! chat omg this is truly just routine for them,,,, Like out of the 3 siblings, Freminet always gave off the biggest child assassin vibe, but wow. To see that routine and desensitized nature of the HotH's line of work just,, splayed out in a Character Trailer is . wow. and the look in his eyes as he says it is- wow.
YEAH UHH BLOODSTAIN ON HER FACE??/ The lighting in this scene now is evidently less saturated. And it's just- oh my FUCKING GOD it does so many things:
the blood on Arle's face looks... dry. it doesn't look as fresh as you may expect which could mean many things. It could mean she spent,,, hella long in there with that guy doing what needed to be done. It could mean she took care of something else immediately after dealing with that guy (perhaps smth related to the children Snezhevna wanted to save). But regardless, it means she didn't put in the effort to clean her face and hide what happened. OBVIOUSLY !!! that is so . obviously her style but to S E E IT IN MY GENSHIN IMPACT CHARACTER TRAILER it's- oh my god
it serves to highlight the really, truly, bleak nature of the scene now that we know plain and simple Arlecchino just killed a man. There's no subtext, there's no reading between the lines. The only thing that didn't happen is that we didn't see contact nor see a body. But, no sugarcoating, Arlecchino killed a man. No one is hiding it. You are not surprised. No one should be but damn.
and ofc it acts as a representation of Snezhevna dying...
because it seems like the saturation is back once the camera switches to looking at Snezhevna laying in bed.
And is it me, or does it look like Arle's allowing herself to actually display a tinge of worry in her expression this time? And also, EVER so slightly in her tone as well. You can feel it, it's gentler.
"Once I'm better I'll start my next mission.."
THIS. THIS!! IN SO MANY WAYS THIS!
OKAY. so bear with me. I haven't actually read any of the sibling's character stories yet, so there could be a LOT of info I'm missing but:
There's still a pretty thought-provoking conversation going on (in MY mind, at least) about just how intensely these children are being trained to be soldiers for the Fatui. They're obviously in an environment that indoctrinates them into being soldiers of SOME kind, but I still don't know what kind of soldier that's supposed to be. Are they all ALWAYS extensions of the Fatui? Or are they more-so extensions of Arlecchino specifically..? Snezhevna was obviously trying to help those children she came across, and I'm assuming that happened on her latest mission, so was the mission for a charitable cause?? What was her next mission supposed to be?? Same line of work? Saving people? Or would it switch up and was she going to be sent to "take care of" (kill .) someone???
So I don't know whether to interpret that line as a hint of them being overworked and 1) feeling like they need to continue their work out of pure fear that they'll be deemed ineffective and useless... or 2) feeling like they need to continue their work out of a sense of loyalty and duty to the place that took them in and raised them. Or both..
and ofc the funeral scene. I can't say much more than what's already shown right on the screen.
and am I bugging? Or is the location of the grave....
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#LONG post#first of all. I am kissing Genshin Impact's (HoYovere's entire) artstyle on the mouth.#second of all#Erin Yvette#oh my god Erin Yvette.#the 'My child...' line.. what if I literally blow up the world I'm going to explode#Arlecchino is drop dead gorgeous in this. That's a given but what kind of gay person would I be if I didn't say it anyway#it's always a given with their trailers. A l w a y s.#she's so drop dead handsome oh my god I fucking hate gender#blazingramble#holy shit new tag wtf#I try not to do these on here often but...#meh. my blog#I needed a place to write it down and I'm honestly getting self-conscious abt using my discord server#I say the kids at the HotH are desensitized 'cause like.. it's FUCKING IMPOSSIBLE that they DON'T know!!!!#they can ACT like they don't !!! sure! repression is very real and these kids are exposed to a LOT of trauma. Yes#but they are NOT FUCKING IGNORANT about it#the older ones at least; of course the younger they are the more likely they're sheltered from the Fatui's violent practices#like Lyney Lynette Freminet and other kids their age are child assassins. Now I'm PRETTY FUCKIN CONFIDENT they've killed people#like it wasn't hard to believe before but (and remember I haven't read their character stories) before it was mostly believable conjecture#I can't get over the scene where she returns to the bed#Arlecchino#genshin impact#genshin#genshin arlecchino#the knave#Genshin the knave#blazingshitpost genshin edition#blazingshitpost#Youtube
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arklay · 6 months
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DANI HAINES x CARLOS OLIVEIRA / template.
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dragonsongmakhali · 4 months
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Birthday time 😎
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aeide-thea · 6 months
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poäng appreciation post 💛
#i forget if i said but Baby Sister and i stopped off at ikea on the way back from picking her up at the bus stop on monday#and finally replaced the ruined-by-a-succession-of-cats-(in-ways-both-unsightly-and-gross) Accent Chair in the living room#with a poäng rocker (bc the shape is a little more interesting and less instantly recognizable than the regular chair) in birch (my beloved#also they make fancy tufted cushions for it now! wish they came in more colors but it's a real improvement on sad options past#and anyway it's like. now you can actually sit here in the morning and look out the window at the extremely beautiful view#and the chair actually supports you??? like i could see down the road trying to work out some kind of custom cushioning that's thicker#but the shape of the frame is so ergonomic for me that it's genuinely quite comfortable regardless. bentwood exocorset…#anyway. not a very original post but i just DO really love ikea#like yes it's a mixed bag but also honestly if you're buying particle board—#(i was going to say 'and expecting it to hold up' but. honestly i think it's just. if you're buying particle board period)#—that might be on you.#(like. if you're being pressed in from all sides by budget constraints and immediate need and no accessible better-made used alternatives—#obviously you do what you have to. but it's like buying pleather—you know‚ or should‚ that the material is going to disintegrate.)#but the things ikea makes with decent materials are remarkably well-designed and affordable for what they are‚ has been my sense?#you just gotta shop carefully but like. that's true literally everywhere.#anyway. in conclusion i love my new buddy with its clean lines. …do people name chairs ever.#i've never before had the urge but this one feels like a little assembly-line friend that deserves its own identity. like a star wars clone#(lol what if i gave it a little nametag somewhere hidden. secret identity talisman 4 chairpal.)#(& yes i promise i'm as aware of the‚ uh‚ itself-ness of this tag spiral as you are. :) )#domesticities
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spamtoon · 12 days
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(Out of nowhere, you are approached by a familiar lightbulb-headed Cog.)
Ah, it's you, cat. Thinking you're oh-so-slick. Muttering and whispering under those raggedy whiskers of yours... Thinking I am unable to hear it all...
Well, you've simply underestimated my fantastic hearing. You probably want to know the reason why I'm here, taking a 'break' from my incredibly important scientific breakthroughs? It's quite simple, really!
(She gets close, and squints her eyes.)
I know what you are.
Farewell, now!
(She then leaves the way she came from.)
(Spam giggles immensely, covering her face... it always seems like she's giggling, isn't she? This lasts... at least thirty seconds. Longer than usual.)
And I know what I am too, Sparky! You broke through something, that's for sure. Really, broke through...
(She looks down, continuing to laugh nervously.)
You know, I find it odd you Havent tried to bulb blast me into the stratosphere by now. I mean knowing how you acted with Frostbite. Is there something peculiar about me that you perhaps can't quite track? Something about me that you... don't know what I am?
I know, I know, I'm talking to nobody again. But you were there when I had a moment today with the one the only Frostbite The Bravecog. You may be remaining. Lurking in the shadows. Knowing about these thoughts that I'm thinking.
(The giggling resumes, lasting far shorter this time.)
Your brother's a piece of fucking barp, by the way
(She braces for impact for a few seconds, wincing while smiling, before comically looking around to realize nobody's there. She sighs.)
Wow, okay maybe toony superhero show logic doesn't apply in this situation. Cool.
WAIT I JUST FUCKING REALIZED WHAT SHE MEANT but like. Dude if she meant that then what's the point I mean the whole ahh sellbot department barping knows unless you're Really low on the ladder. Heheh... maybe she did mean what I thought she meant.
Oh i'm so fucking screwed. What kind of bitch gets filament fever
#bright spark#<- for finding this again later. haha i called her sparky#the way she talks fucking tickles my brain so much im so . ohguohguohoghog SHE#SORRY THAT THIS TOOK SO LONG you see i was in the mindset that i would do this one little thing and then i would do my work which uh.#that leads to so so SO much procrastination. including on fun things! oh so fun things.#today was an event.#i also spent quite a bit of time ruminating i “would she really say that” is worse when shes literally you#to clarify. she is spam's aunt by like. building standards. not really in her found family. so its fucked up but as i said in discord this#is like. a “your mom's kinda hot” level crush. you know. also sorry i really wanted to say filament fever its been eating at me okay#nothing SERIOUS the way my f/os (and spam's f/os (plural now?? i guess?? if today was a canon event)) are#honestly mark still feels like the only real one with her to me but damn it. if spam's reflecting My Changes then she's Reflecting My Chang#spam in toontown unlike my other sonas is the most “its just you again” out of all of them and thats partially because her main#cog connection... is frostbite. they bounce off each other like we literally bounce off each other and damn it shes been so stagnant on her#own because of it. mark happened and she mirrored that because i kept fucking talking about him while we were in character and ideally#i should TRY to fix her. but also man because i'm not doing Serious lore stuff with her i dont. even know if i want to.#i kinda brushed it over the rug by saying that she relies on her constant entertainment so readily because she herself still doesnt feel#like she has a place outside of cogs only. sure she's in high roller backstage sure she's in allan's family now but shes not Doing anything#with herself the way that her friends are. mole's a ranger. frostbite cohosts. wishes... has chip. and something she doesn't have--#living and fully growing as a toon. rather than being haphazardly slapped into a world. and in some respects she's envious of frostbite#finding themselves so quickly because she distracts herself because she's still kinda struggling with it. despite everything. yes she lives#happy and carefree a lot of the time but she keeps buying those dumb phones because when she's truly alone... her mind starts to wander.#that's what mark is for. so that spam can dream of a world where she has a purpose. even if its fake and fragile and just nothing compared#to the great friends that she already has. where she feels like its worth it doing something when she doesn't have anyone. and in that#respect. with the goons ma allan parallels in sonboy the spam cathal parallels shine. seeking tv (and to a lesser extent games) as a#method of escapism. even when one's life is already pretty good. because there's nothing else worth doing without friends or family.#the internet isn't just cool. it gives her something to be when it seems like everyone is something but her. and maybe thats a lazy#excuse for why it seems like she doesnt HAVE anything to call her own but that but damn it i'm trying my best to twist it around.#spam has such a HISTORY yknow? even if it feels like i havent established her much.#spam is the hearts to frostbite's spades not just because they're the duo of all time but because spam's fake stupid love keeps her going#sorry i just started rambling in the tags of this post about spam it. happens. she loves her friends so much i need to reiterate that okay
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apocalypticdemon · 13 days
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ughhhh writing hard
#it has truly been like pulling teeth today.#sometimes i write things that are actually good with prose that makes me go 'oh that's clever'#and sometimes writing is like it is today. where i all i do is 'they do this and then do this and then do this and oh my god.#i have repeated myself 3 times already i can see it. but i don't know how to fix it'#yes yes i know that's what editing is for but god dammit do i wish i didn't have to edit every fuckin' thing i write#if only things could be good the first time i try. ugh ugh ugh#i know where i want it to go brain just doesn't want it to go anywhere today#worried that it's bloated. that i have too many words. that too many things are irrelevant.#that there's no real plot despite Altogether Too Many Words. that i haven't put in enough conflict to warrant this many words.#that things are just cobbled together upon my whims and will not read in a way that is intuitive.#mrghhhhhh#it's fine i'll be fine i just want this to be good. i don't want to post altogether too many words of poor-quality writing.#i want it to be good and atmospheric and compelling like so many fics i've read that have been impactful.#i'm afraid it won't be good at all.#i'm trying really hard not to get in my own way and not get stuck on these moments#and just get actions and happenings down on the page so i don't get hung up on my writing quality#and just never finish anything#i've been writing on my own for a few years now (fic that i haven't cobbled into anything coherent and never posted)#but i don't really know if it's good. sometimes there are moments. but it's never what i want it to be.#and i'm afraid. but i want it. i'm trying.#just painful today is all.
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Me, everyday I go without one of these agents in my fucking inbox:
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talkorsomething · 2 months
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Too [insert adjective here] for guard ...................
Well, it's only half related.
We "hit a pothole", "had a slipup", whatever you want to call it — sunday. Aka: for the sake of my sanity we are not labeling it a relapse but good god does it feel as though I have invited the demons back in.
I know why, but I don't really know why. Because, I mean... I never have, to begin with. So: when I decided i was doing it sunday, i accepted it. "Let it happen", as someone would probably say to me. It's not...
I've been thinking about it for a while now. It's like anything - it comes and goes, a few times a year, and no matter what, I always ignore it.
Except, maybe there's something I'm not paying attention to? Or, ignoring, is the better word for it?
Of course it would be the one thing I have happening in my life.
November, I was burnt out for unrelated reasons. It was a lot to take in. That made sense. Now? ... why now?
There's not really any pressure on me. Yes, I have to do things, yes, it will be noticed if they're bad, but ...... it's not important. We don't spend time on it. I'm coming back next year, but it might be at the cost of ... all of this. I think it's progress. I haven't touched my guitar in any serious capacity in over a year. I think it's progress.
I don't take compliments well. I can't tell if that's why I don't get them, but I'm not being corrected much either. Only when I drift too far from what the work is supposed to be, only after weeks of it going, I can only assume, unnoticed. I keep getting stuck.
...push it back down.
Telling me I'm doing good isn't telling me what I know I have to be getting wrong. I could take it, at the cost of... all of this. I'm anticipating, and I know it can come. This is not where I was when I started.
It's been said, I haven't been told, that not starting it means you're more of a burden, by making the other person have to do it first. I know that. I do. And still it doesn't help. I'm not drowning. It wasn't an accident, but it wasn't planned, either. I don't know you.
I don't know you.
I'm not a good person. I'm not a nice person. Every week I tell myself this is really it, and every week I come back, and ... what? Forget I ever said anything? Forget we're not friends?
Well, we're not, huh? Nobody is, with me. What you see I swear you misunderstand. You don't ask. If you do, well, I can't answer. We're at an impasse.
It's not even my fault we didn't make it. I shouldn't feel like this over nothing. I don't do anything. You will, correctly, not let me do anything, because potential doesn't matter if you can't back it up. If you won't back it up. I let things happen to me.
I don't even feel better. And, actually, ironically, i think i know what would let me feel better. If I can't be upset with anyone else, at least I can be with myself.
... but, well, not even that. Your heart in my hands, but I mean it diegetically. And metaphorically. I hate putting myself out there, I hate having to actually perform, and yet every time, no matter what, I do it. I'm fine. I only cared at the start, and even then not very.
I don't feel anything. Not a lot, anyways. I don't let it happen. I can't. I don't know what it'll mean if I start being honest with myself.
...
I've pulled myself out of this before. A few times, now. Different circumstances, but I've done it all the same. Seasonal depression notwithstanding.
I'm only here because I did things I was scared to. And still, I'm the same. No progress made. The only way out is to do it again but I feel like I can't. I can't.
Will someone just let me say that?
Will someone just fucking help for once?
#sh tw#(implied - i know i didnt actually say it in the post but yes i did c** myself sunday)#100% секретный дневник левы НЕ ЧИТАЙ#im cursed with being a bit too self aware so#i think its compounded by my nepotism hire ... not letting me do my nepotism hire things#(for legal reasons i cannot say)#and then to add to that not letting me do anything I probably COULD actually do given slightly more instruction (at guard)#its just ... im a very angry person actually . except right now thats because im not EATING RIGHT EITHER#BECAUSE ALL OF MY PROBLEMS ARE COMBINING INTO ONE BIG INTERCONNECTED PROBLEM#back to my point.#guard instructors decided that for my first year i will not do anything cool because i'm not able to learn in about 2 seconds flat#[read: get very upset very quickly when i get things wrong and then . cant do them because im trying not to have a breakdown over]#[something REALLY STUPID like NOT BEING ABLE TO DO A SIMPLE TURN WHILE MOVING WITH THE FLAG]#so like okay. i get it okay. i'm not good at this. could you at least TELL ME i suck so i can feel justified about feeling bad about it.#could you just fucking tell me this isn't a guard where you can show up with no experience. could you do me a real solid and tell me that.#i dont know maybe the real sign it wasnt for me was when i was seriously considering not turning up for the second 'audition'#really i just hate how much he yells at us. not even at ME because i do so little there is no room to fuck it up. just at everyone else .#it doesn't motivate me to come back but i NEED 'friends' so bad and i love performing so now i just get anxious enough that i cant eat ..#.. before going to rehearsal. which is stupid. because i've done it a million times before.#......#i'm just.... everyone says he isn't actually that bad. & he used to be worse. so it really is just me.#it's just me being oversensitive. because i've never had any REAL experience in ... just about anything#so; yes. it IS on me how I feel and obviously how I react. and I keep pushing it down because it's stupid; really; to still feel this way.#anyways. our last weekend without a competition is this very weekend#so you'll never guess who's having a REALLY FUCKING HARD TIME trying to practice#i'm like this close to going to bed early and without having done the dance warmup for the third day in a row.#лёва there is no TIME why are you STILL NOT PRACTICING for the love of god get it together#(oh also when i say 'friends' in quotes it is because i desparately want to believe we're friends but they dont even talk to me really)#(and because im not even IN most of the show theres not much to bond over. literally like i have everything down Decent enough (apparently)#so theres not even any 'i will help u with this toss' team bonding. no shared moment of we are all out of breath because i DONT DO ANYTHING
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youngks-smile · 2 months
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What I Want You To Know About Long COVID
Well lads, I've been suffering from Long COVID for over a year now. My life is at a complete standstill. I'm 25 years old and I'm too sick to go back to school, I can't work, I had to move back in with my parents and I'm still stuck here.
Here are just a few things I wish people knew about Long COVID, including things I didn't know myself until I got it.
COVID destroys your immune system. Yes, even if you don't have Long COVID. Are you getting sick more often now? When you get sick, does it last longer? There are many studies showing that COVID causes t cell depletion, even in mild COVID cases! T cells are how your body remembers how to fight off infections you've had before so losing those cells? Bad news.
Your initial infection can be mild and you can still get Long COVID. Right from Yale Medicine, "Most people with Long COVID had mild acute COVID." (This is also a good link for a basic Long COVID overview).
There can be a gap of time between when you "get better" from the initial COVID infection to the onset of Long COVID symptoms. Some people get sick with an initial COVID infection and never get better. Some get better and then weeks or months later start developing Long COVID symptoms. Long COVID symptoms can even fluctuate over time, can go away for months and then suddenly come back.
So many people have Long COVID and don't realize it. Do you feel more tired lately but no matter how much you sleep, nothing helps? Is it harder to concentrate at work or school? Can you just not think like you used to? You could have Long COVID and not even know it. Even mild post-COVID symptoms are still Long COVID.
COVID can do anything to your body. Long COVID has over 200 recognized symptoms and can affect basically any part or system of your body. There is no one mechanism or cause of Long COVID which unfortunately also means there's no one cure either.
The effects of COVID are cumulative. Each COVID reinfection increases your chances of developing Long COVID. COVID is also affecting your body in other ways, yes, even if you're otherwise young and healthy! "Repeat COVID-19 infections increase risk of organ failure, death".
Once you have Long COVID, repeat COVID infections will make your symptoms worse. "80% [of Long COVID patients] saw their symptoms worsen [from reinfection]. In 60% of people who were in recovery or remission from Long COVID, reinfection caused a recurrence of Long COVID."
There is a lot more I want to say about Long COVID but I want to keep this post at least somewhat manageable to read. Like how when COVID is contracted during pregnancy, those COVID-exposed fetuses have a 6.3-fold increased risk of motor developmental delays, or that another study found 50% of babies exposed to COVID in utero had developmental delays.
You need to keep caring about COVID, for others around you and also for yourself even if you're "healthy". Everyone is at risk. And don't forget 40-60% of COVID infections are asymptomatic, which is why masking even if you feel fine is crucial. The only way right now to not get Long COVID is to not get COVID in the first place. It's not too late, if you've stopped masking it's never too late to start again! I know it's easy to get distracted by things in your life that seem more real than the possibility of getting sick some time in the future, and the peer pressure to not mask can be intense. But it only feels less real or less important until your entire life is having Long COVID. Trust me.
I know this is a complicated issue, many people can't afford to stay home when sick even if they want to because of their jobs, there are disgusting policies trying to ban wearing masks, but please if you can. Keep masking. Masking works, masking saves lives.
This post got a bit longer than I wanted so below the cut is a non-exhaustive list of my Long COVID symptoms and some of my experiences as one of the "healthy young people" who got "unlucky". cw brief mention of suicidal ideation.
Welcome to the Thunderdome that is my body with Long COVID. Keep in mind these are just my experiences and symptoms, Long COVID can cause any range of symptoms at varying severities.
Dysautonomia: Exercise intolerance, Post-Exertional Malaise (PEM), fatigue, and heat intolerance. What do those things mean? Here's some specific examples. Absolutely terrible circulation I am so cold all the time but also, if I get a little too warm I will pass out. Eating hot food makes my heart rate spike, I sweat, my body feels heavy. Blood pooling and pins and needles in my feet when I walk. Don't even think about exercising past walking, it's impossible. I used to work out an hour a day 4 times a week and now walking up one flight of stairs makes my heart pound and I can't breathe. Can't take even just warm showers anymore or I will pass out. Heat rashes from being in the sun for 10 minutes.
Digestive issues: Honestly too many to name but: constant bloating, extreme nausea, constipation, slow motility, lack of appetite, just so much cramping and pain. I lost 18 pounds from Long COVID, as someone who was already considered underweight their entire life, and almost had to get a shunt put into my chest to deliver nutrients because I was nearly completely unable to eat. For the first 6 months of Long COVID, if I could manage 600 calories a day, that was a good day.
Histamine intolerance: Oh boy. My worst symptoms, I don't even know where to start with it. If you know Mast Cell Activation Syndrome (MCAS) it's very similar. I can only eat 19 foods. If i eat a single bite of something not on that list, it's 48 hours of absolute hell. Coughing, migraines, itchy eyes, such extreme nausea I cannot even describe it, panic/feeling of doom, racing heart rate, derealization, rash, uncontrollable muscle tremors. I only learned about histamine intolerance 5 months into having Long COVID so before that, I was experiencing these symptoms nearly every single day. Terrifying isn't even a strong enough word to describe how it felt to experience all this and have no idea what it was, how to stop it, or if it would ever stop. Really dark times.
Neurological issues: More of that derealization. Inability to concentrate. Anxiety. OCD-like symptoms such as thoughts getting "stuck" in my head, repeating 24/7 completely unable to stop them, genuinely felt like my brain had cracked open and I had lost my mind. Constant dizziness like I'm on a boat.
Sleep issues: I sleep like garbage. I have insomnia, I wake up dozens of times every night and every single time I sleep I have intensely vivid dreams. I can't sleep longer than 7 hours total no matter how exhausted I am. It is exhausting. I'm exhausted, I'm so so tired.
And finally. Just. Really intense suicidal ideation. My body, my health, my entire life has been stolen from me because someone else decided my life was worth less to them than wearing a mask or staying home if they feel sick. Before I got Long COVID, I was preparing to go to South Korea to teach English, then on to a PhD in neurolinguistics, I was supposed to meet my long distance partner and had already booked plane tickets when I got sick. All of that has been destroyed.
Most of us with Long COVID are stuck in a cycle of being extremely sick, then if you're lucky you'll slowly get better over months, just to get reinfected and go right back where you started or worse. Honestly, I'm not scared of dying from COVID. I'm scared of living for a long time, suffering from Long COVID the entire time. This isn't living.
I don't know how to end this now. I'm still fighting, I'm trying experimental treatments, I'm not giving up yet. I hope everyone reading this stays healthy and well.
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koushirouizumi · 7 months
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{Blog P.S.A} For New Followers
Where to Find Me: MY "ABOUT"+F.A.Q {READ FIRST}: Here (About) + Here (F.A.Q)! A.0.3: Hikari {Currently/Mainly creating for Digimon, Adventure-related franchise} Other Sideblogs: izzyizumi (main Digimon blog) hikari-m (official Digimon {news+art} archiving; Asks or follows may come from here, Depending) taichi-x-koushiro (Archiving for Yagami Taichi/Izumi Koushiro) IF YOU ARE A NEW FOLLOWER OR LURKER, I'd really appreciate if you can send me an Ask and introduce yourself (you do not need to expect a response from me), even a short description like name (Pennames are definitely fine!), preferred pronouns (if any) and/or what brought you to my page and what you're staying for (Especially if you were here for re-source{s} posts, I've been curious if they've been helping anyone!) The reason I am asking this is because lately there's been a huge uptick of spam blogs following with particular "patterns" to their Likes, Follows, etc. and in order to prevent from being soft-blocked by accident if you are not actively blogging, it'd be great to know in advance if you're a real person. Aside from A.0.3 the only other 'active' archives of social media that I have are my old Live-journal and Dream-width accounts, and even they're not quite in use these days. However, if you also have active LJs or DWs and actively blog, feel free to let me know too!
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It’d be very, very cool if people could also learn to read my FAQ page linked on the sidebar before sending Asks or interacting directly with either of my blogs or myself, because I’m seriously TIRED of people ignoring it and my rules for interaction.
I am a {diagnosed since childhood} Autistic, G.N.C {Gender Non-conforming} + THEY/THEM Jewish blogger. I reblog about those topics here for that reason. {Also my Ko-fi is here.}
* PLEASE DO NOT FOLLOW OR INTERACT WITH ANY OF MY POSTS IF YOU BLATANTLY HATE/DISMISS, OR EXPECT ME TO HATE/DISMISS THE ADVENTURE [+02] + TRI + KIZUNA + 2020 CHOSEN, KOUSHIRO (*ANY KOUSHIRO, INCLUDES FOR EXAMPLE: TRI!KOUSHIRO, OWG!KOUSHIRO, 2020!KOUSHIRO, KIZUNA!KOUSHIRO), TAICHI (*ANY TAICHI, INCLUDING 2020!TAICHI, TRI!TAICHI, KIZUNA!TAICHI), DAISUKE MOTOMIYA (or “DAVIS”), SORA TAKENOUCHI (*INCLUDING 02!SORA, TRI!SORA, 2020!SORA, KIZUNA!SORA), HIKARI YAGAMI (*INCLUDING 02!HIKARI, TRI!HIKARI, KIZUNA!HIKARI, 2020!HIKARI), MIMI TACHIKAWA (*INCLUDING 02!MIMI, TRI!MIMI, KIZUNA!MIMI, 2020!MIMI), MIYAKO INOUE (*INCLUDING KIZUNA!MIYAKO), ALL/ANY OTHER DIGIMON GIRLS SUCH AS IZUMI ORIMOTO {FRONTIER}, JURI KATOU {TAMERS}, JUN MOTOMIYA {02}, OR MEIKO MOCHIZUKI. THANK YOU (I WILL PERMABLOCK IF YOU FORCE-INTERACT OR BLOCK EVADE)
* PLEASE DO NOT FOLLOW OR INTERACT IF YOU CAN’T STAND MY SHIPS TO THE POINT YOU CAN’T EVEN BE RESPECTFUL WHEN INTERACTING WITH SOMEONE WHO SHIPS YOUR NOTP. (I WILL PERMABLOCK YOU IF I NOTICE)
** THESE RULES ALSO APPLY TO MY OTHER BLOG.
*** DO NOT INTERACT IF YOU SUPPORT HARASSMENT / BULLYING / ABUSE (I WILL INSTANTLY PERMA-BLOCK YOU) OR IF YOU SUPPORT / PLATFORM PEOPLE WHO DO.
NOTICE: I am much less active on a personal level on this blog nowadays (in the sense of making personal posts or fan-works/posting fic; I still reblog informative posts). I am slightly more active on my other socials, but most of them are private and friends-locked to older groups of mutuals. If you are curious or wanting to interact about Digimon (especially Adventures or about my favorite characters and ships for this fandom) specifically, please feel free to message me about them, but please understand I may not add or speak with anyone that I do not fully trust or know well. (It will help if most of your stances on social-justice issues align with and don’t blatantly conflict with my own. I tend to not add/follow people anywhere whose posts I cannot filter [i.e. there are many popular Western media fandoms / mega-fandoms I’m not in which I blacklist, types of fanworks I don’t personally care for that I blacklist, etc]. I do not do follow-backs so please do not follow or interact here expecting one). It will also help if you read my FAQ first and agree to it before asking.
PLEASE FAMILIARIZE YOURSELF WITH MY FANDOMS LIST (notably more the major fandoms but) BEFORE YOU INTERACT WITH ANY POST ON THIS BLOG. If I check/quick-vet your blog and find nothing but hate{watching} posts/“Critical” posts for my fandoms (ESPECIALLY THIS ONE), unless I’ve reblogged from you first, I MAY HARDBLOCK YOU.
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good lird they did not make a gimmick blog about a real life murder
#someone fucking DIED but whatever who gives a shit it's funny i guess
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🥚 eggvidenced Follow
honestly with how suspicious and confusing everything on the dl-6 case was i wouldn't be surprised if it came out that it was that prosecutor guy tbh
🌟 rockliker270 Follow
date posted: june 23, 2010
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⚖️ courtofpublicopinions Follow
🌟 rockliker270 Follow
ok hear me out. what abt winston payne though
🧊 just--ice Follow
okay now they're just making lawyers up
#also didn't mvk die or something?
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🔥 triedbyfire Follow
why the fuck are you people still posting about the gavinners as if theyre not copaganda. didn't the guitarist get convicted of murder
🎸 guiltiest-lovers837 Follow
so fucking tired of this "um um didn't daryan get convicted of murder" YEAH AND HE'S LITERALLY NOT IN THE FUCKING BAND ANYMORE. dipshit
🔥 triedbyfire Follow
are you gonna address the copaganda thing or
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🌻 attorneybout Follow
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he's so. 😳
📂 trialanderror Follow
why is he defending
📂 trialanderror Follow
OP WHY IS HE DEFENDING???
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🦈 giantlakemonsters Follow
i just wanna hear about another gourdy sighting thats all
🥜 liberdeez Follow
op. i'm so sorry op. gourdy isn't real you have to let her go. they had a whole trial about it.
🔐 wrightorwrong Follow
hi!! so this isn't actually the case as while gourdy was briefly mentioned in a trial, said trial had nothing to do with whether or not gourdy was "real" per se as much as. well. murder, actually. while gourdy WAS found out to be an inflatable steel samurai this was not brought up in the case at all as the veracity of gourdy wasn't really as relevant as the fact that the witness was looking for gourdy rather than at the murder she claimed to have seen. plus this was also a relatively small part of a MUCH larger trial which for those interested not only solved the dl-6 case but ALSO marked the end of prosecutor von karma's ~40 year long record and the court records are really a fascinating read through!!
🦀 mad_libz_87 Follow
net 0 information post
#thanks again lawblr
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🍒 cherriescoola Follow
btw i was at the park the other day and klavier gavin (of gavinners fame) was there and obv there was a huge crowd but this guy was there with him and at some point he (the other guy) waved to the crowd and someone still screamed like it was klavier??? who was that guy ive never seen him before in my life
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🩸 has-dl6-been-solved-yet Follow
December 28, 2016
YES!!!
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🪙 tellerlikeitis Follow
guys help i'm a bank teller and this guy just introduced himself as robin banks what do i do
🔪 violencekilling Follow
you gotta let him rob you that's the law
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👻 ghostesswiththemostest Follow
look if i ever get convicted of murder im just hiring the lawyer with the coolest sounding name
💼 courtofwaw Follow
bestie if you already got convicted it is Too Late
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📋 lawandwhoreder Follow
guys i know it's real fun to think people just can predict whatever but if you look at the earliest reblogs of that post that "guessed" the true killer in the dl-6 case it was actually a post about how they didn't want to go to the store. clearly edited
#stg nobody bothers to factcheck anything anymore
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🐺 lawnewolf Follow
i am NOT homophobic or whatever the fuck you guys are saying now i just think its weird to write fanfiction about realass people?? go touch grass ffs
🌈 lawsbian Follow
the fun police (this guy) putting me in yaoi court but the lawyers (phoenix witrght and miles edgeworth) just keep trying to make out (real court is like this too btw)
🐺 lawnewolf Follow
YOU HAVE SOMETHING WRONG WITH YOU.
#look idc what your enemies to lovers fic bullshit says #they're straight. and more importantly REAL PEOPLE. #there's TENSION because they are in COURT and there are LIVES on the LINE. #not because they wanna fuck. god.
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🔮 inhighspirits Follow
why dont they just ask the spirit mediums to ask the victims who killed them this law shit is easy
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💞 lawveyourself Follow
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seriously i cant believe they gave this guy a law degree
💞 lawveyourself Follow
what do you mean evidence fraud
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🎧 instrumentalillness Follow
fuck you *unguilties your love*
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🎀 copiicat Follow
perjury isnt illegal btw in fact if youre one of tge witnesses youre legally required to lie on the stand. thats why everyone does it. trust me
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tossawary · 2 months
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Listening to someone else watch the original ATLA again, just starting season 3, and there's this line where Aang suggests that it didn't just look like he died, but he DID actually die and Katara brought him back. And look, I don't know much about the lore introduced by TLOK, but this sounds like a really fun place to start an AU inspired by "Buffy the Vampire Slayer"'s take on the temporary death and resurrection of a cyclical chosen one: Aang is brought back to life and is STILL the Avatar, but his temporary death still also causes another Avatar to be born into the Southern Water Tribe (or Swamp People or refugees on some southern island, whatever).
Like, I know the Avatar is a reincarnation thing, but weird things can happen with spirits! Maybe this glitch in the cycle causes the spiritual equivalent of mitosis to happen to the Avatar and the spirit attached to them, so there's just two of them now! Maybe having two Avatars has some spiritual downsides, maybe not, it's up to whatever path you choose to explore in this AU.
I just think it would be really funny for post-canon 21yo Aang (and the Gaang and the White Lotus and all the spiritual / religious orders on the planet) to suddenly be confronted with a 10yo water tribe kid who is ALSO the Avatar.
A water tribe couple shuffle awkwardly up to Sokka, like, "Sooooo... we think our 10 year old daughter might be the Avatar...? She can, uh, bend all the elements and all that. Look at this shit." And Sokka is like, "Fuck, Aang is dead?!" Before he's like, "Wait, I saw Aang last week, this kid is way too old?!" And he has to hastily contact Aang like, "Hey, buddy, you're still alive, right?" And Aang can only reply, "Uhhh, last I checked, yes?!?!"
It's probably Sokka and Katara who put the pieces of the timeline together and figure out what caused this, because all of the other Avatars are probably initially like, "Yeah, I have no idea what's happening here. I'm you and you're me, but I'm also her and she's also me, and you and her are kind of the same person, but you're obviously different people now? Wow! Good luck figuring all that out, kid! You're really going places none of us have gone before! A real groundbreaker!"
Aang, through gritted teeth, "I am really not TRYING to do that, thank you!"
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