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defectivevillain · 1 year

Text

struck by your lightning, chii

reader’s pronouns: he/him

here’s chapter one [you’ll want to read this first, otherwise this part won’t make much sense]

as i mentioned in part one, this is a chat fic and the formatting was mostly made for ao3. it’s a lil wonky here, so here’s the ao3 version if you’d prefer to read that :)

a lil recap of last chapter: you're assigned to work the red carpet at a national awards gala. there, you interview tons of celebrities, including kaminari! kaminari is super nice & you leave the event feeling exhausted, relieved, and satisfied all at once. you return home to take a light nap, only to wake up to a notification from your phone. it seems kaminari is texting you...? that's weird.

Direct Message

You: SKJNFIOE LK>BFGJSL B>GEJRHKR BLWUIFKGJ ER

Kaminari Denki: u good?

You: TOTALLY COMPLETELY FINE

Kaminari Denki: OKAY, GOOD ?

You: YEP…

You: 😶

Kaminari Denki: 😶 😶

You: sorry i didn’t believe you

You: i have to be careful with messages from unknown numbers…

You: well, you get it, i’m sure.

Kaminari Denki: ya i get it

You: also, i have something to say to you

Kaminari Denki: wassup

You: waffles are better fck u

Kaminari Denki: ur so wrong.

You: I AM ABSOTLEUYL NOT

Kaminari Denki: LMFAO YOU ABSOTLEUYL ARE

You: FUCK U

Kaminari Denki: 😘

You: hold on. hold onnnnnn.

You: how’d u get this number ??

You: pls don’t tell me my number is leaked

Kaminari Denki: nahhh it’s not leaked

____

You have to breathe a sigh of relief at that. It’s not like you’re an important public figure or anything, but the thought of anyone having access to your phone number sends shivers down your spine. You already get enough spam calls.

____

Kaminari Denki: i got ur number cuz…

Kaminari Denki: idol perks

You: you just asked my coworker, didn’t you

Kaminari Denki: yup

You: sigh…

Kaminari Denki: they told me that if i hurt you

Kaminari Denki: they’d murder me

You: gsjfdkheng3oaejk….

You: just give me a moment to scream

Kaminari Denki: …

You: ok im bck

Kaminari Denki: LOL dude ur good dw abt it 😭

Kaminari Denki: i thought it was kinda cute actually

You: unfortunately, they were dead fucking serious… they could kill a bitch

You: i wouldn’t be surprised if they’ve already killed someone, actually…

Kaminari Denki: well that’s comforting

You: ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

You: also, congrats on the award !

Kaminari Denki: thx

Kaminari Denki: does this mean you’ll listen to my music now?

You: maybe

Kaminari Denki: hmph :/

You: why?

Kaminari Denki: why what?

You: idk. why do you care? it’s not like my listening will give you any money

Kaminari Denki: …

Kaminari Denki: cause ur cute and i like you?

You: what

Kaminari Denki: wha

You: what

Kaminari Denki: wha

You:

Kaminari Denki: welp i’m just gonna go then 🏃🏃🏃

You: no waittt

You: sorry, you just surprised me

Kaminari Denki: no one’s ever said that to you before?

You: well, i mean, yeah, but…

Kaminari Denki: who. when. where. why.

You: plssss

You: what album should i start on then

Kaminari Denki: lightning

You: oki

Kaminari Denki: tell me how u like it after ;0

You: okiii

You: alr i’m gonna go to bed

Kaminari Denki: gn (´｡• ω •｡`)

____

Kaminari: it’s been a week are you alive

____

You grimace at the notification displayed on your lock screen. Admittedly, you hadn’t meant to ignore him- time just slipped away from you. Guilt stews in your chest all the same.

____

You: no i’m definitely not

Kaminari: sooo what’d ya think

You: oh SHIT that’s what i forgot to do

You: im so sorryyyyy the agency has been running me ragged 🙏

Kaminari: don’t apologize for doing ur job,, lol

Kaminari: what are they having you do?

You: whaleeee

You: before, i was more of a local reporter

You: but since the awards, i’ve actually been interviewing other celebrities and stuff

Kaminari: oh

You: it’s weird, tbh

Kaminari: ya a lot of music folks are pretty weird

You: says you

Kaminari: oi! i’m not weird 😡

You: im jk lolll

Kaminari: you know for a reporter you have awful grammar

You: well fck u2 then

Kaminari: :P

You: people keep recognizing me now,,, it’s weird

You: like literally a girl came up to me yesterday and was like “you interviewed kaminari!!”

Kaminari: oh shit lol

You: right?

You: other than that, i’ve been good

You: hbu? you’ve probably been busy

Kaminari: nah, not that much. just writing new music.

You: oh cool

You: speaking of music

You: i really liked your album

Kaminari: rly? u listened to it?

You: ofc i did!!!! it was cool

Kaminari Denki: what was ur fave song :P

You: probably shockwave!

You: it was very heartfelt

Kaminari: yeah… i wrote that one in the midst of a breakup

You: awe :(

You: at least it made a great song, haha

Kaminari Denki: yeah, that’s a good way to think about it actually

You: 😌

Kaminari Denki: so what other music do you listen to, then?

Kaminari Denki: besides mine, obviously

You: i listen to sero’s music sometimes

Kaminari Denki: skljehgeiroljhngejlrkshg

You: have you heard of him?

Kaminari Denki: …

Kaminari Denki: yes

You:

Kaminari Denki:

You:

You: r u good?

You: u got rly weird all of a sudden

Kaminari Denki: one sec, i need to kill a bitch

You: wut

____

Direct Message

Kaminari: SERO I AM GOING TO MURDER YOU

Sero Brain Cells: I’M SORRY I DIDN’T MEAN TO RIP YOUR POSTER

Sero Brain Cells: IT WAS AN ACCIDENTTTTTT

Kaminari: what

Sero Brain Cells: what

Kaminari: what poster.

Sero Brain Cells: ohshit💀

Kaminari: sero. what poster.

Sero Brain Cells: ur limited edition one….? ha…… ha……

Kaminari: wow i am literally going to kill you twice

Sero Brain Cells: NO PLS SPARE ME

Kaminari: and to think that wasn’t even what i was going to talk to you about

Kaminari: damn

Kaminari: ok. focus, kaminari.

Sero Brain Cells: i swear i’ll make it up to you bro

Kaminari: you will?

Sero Brain Cells: yes just ask for a favor. any favor and i’ll do it

Kaminari: perfect. stop making music forever.

Sero Brain Cells: okay

Kaminari: nice

Sero Brain Cells: great

Kaminari: perfect

Sero Brain Cells: wait WHAT THE FUCK

Kaminari: u heard me hoe

Sero Brain Cells: wtf crawled up ur ass dude

Kaminari: i asked my friend what kind of music he listens to and he said yours

Sero Brain Cells: holy shit ur talking to that reporter?

Kaminari: HOW IN THE HELL

Kaminari: LITERALLY HOW DID YOU KNOW

Sero Brain Cells: lmfaooo

Sero Brain Cells: kami, i know all of ur other friends. bc they’re also my friends.

Kaminari: sighhhhh

Sero Brain Cells: anyway. he listens to my music?

Kaminari: -_-

Sero Brain Cells: that’s cool tbh

Kaminari: -_-

Sero Brain Cells: give him my number, will u?

Kaminari: i despise you

Kaminari: why are we friends

Sero Brain Cells: because i’m sexy and hot and funny?

Kaminari:

Sero: <3 ?

Kaminari: … <3

Sero Brain Cells: and bc i make good music? ;)

Kaminari is offline.

Sero Brain Cells: damn 💀

____

Direct Message

You: u good, dude…? it's been a few days…

Kaminari Denki: definitely… dude.

You: don’t kill sero, pls? I like his music :$

Kaminari Denki: oof

You: i’m messing with you

You: although i do actually like his music a lot

Kaminari Denki: staHp

You: but i like ur music more ;)

Kaminari Denki: DSNJKGLJSNJGFKSGJLS

____

Direct Message

Kaminari Denki: oh!! also!!! i completely forgot- u left ur placard on the red carpet the other day

You: oh FUCKKKKKK MEEEEE

Kaminari Denki: i mean if you insist

You:

Kaminari Denki:

You:

Kaminari Denki: [placard.jpg]

[placard.jpg]: A picture of the ever-familiar placard that you had at the red carpet. The back is filled with your rampant scribblings and notes. It’s hardly legible once you really look at it. Upon closer investigation, there’s a note in glittery gold ink at the bottom with a cute doodle of a Pikachu. Evidently, that was Kaminari’s doing.

You: AKSJHGSDJSHJKHJS THANK YOU FOR SAVING IT

You: omfg that would’ve been so bad if someone else had gotten ahold of it…

Kaminari Denki: yeah some of these notes are hilarious, dude

Kaminari Denki: “Don’t ask Ground Zero anything. Ever.”

You: NOOOOOO you weren’t supposed to see that

Kaminari Denki: “Don’t ask Shoto about his father,” is a rly good one actually

You: oh goddddd pls spare me

Kaminari Denki: dude it’s okay calm down

Kaminari Denki: do u want it back

You: yeah ig

You: wouldn’t want to leak industry secrets 🙄

You: since u have it… can u just mail it to me

Kaminari Denki: don’t have ur address

You: well i’ll just give it to you then, dude

Kaminari Denki: i don’t have postal

You: wut 😶

____

Direct Message

Kaminari: DUDE HELP MEEEEE

Kaminari: SOS SOS SO FUCKING S

Sero Brain Cells: what’d u do this time

Kaminari: so yk how the cuteass reporter dropped his placard and i picked it up

Sero Brain Cells: u did??? dawg ur whipped 💀

Kaminari: THAT’S NOT IMPORTANT

Kaminari: but anyway i texted him abt it today and he said i could just mail it to him

Kaminari: but!! i was hoping to see him again and obv i didn’t want that to happen

Sero Brain Cells: and????

Kaminari: and… [textconvo.screenshot]

Sero Brain Cells: oh i know you did nottttt

Kaminari: I PANICKED AND SAID I DIDN’T HAVE POSTAL

Sero Brain Cells: yeah,,,, i can see that…..

Kaminari: I'M SO DONE

Sero Brain Cells: dude no ur not

Kaminari: wut

Sero Brain Cells: this is ur chance!!!!!! u can get him to hang out w u by offering to give him the placard thingy

Kaminari: have i ever told u that ur a genius

Sero Brain Cells: not enough, evidently

Kaminari: WELL UR A GENIUS

Kaminari is offline.

Sero Brain Cells: well, ty

____

Direct Message

Kaminari Denki: oi i have an idea

You: what’s up

Kaminari Denki: abt the placard

You: yes?

Kaminari Denki: ur agency’s near that one cafe right

You: espressobeanz? yes

Kaminari Denki: i can meet u there tmrw

You: um what

Kaminari Denki: ?

You:

Kaminari Denki:

You: wait what

Kaminari Denki: what?

You: idk, just… don’t you have more important things to do

Kaminari Denki: not rly

You: ok…

Kaminari Denki: plus i wanna hang out :(

You: ohhhh oki

You: wait holup holdup

You: the cafe is kinda public… r u gonna be ok

Kaminari Denki: why wouldn’t i be

You: idk don’t you get mobbed in public whenever people recognize you

Kaminari Denki: i mean yeah but it’s fine

You: u sure?

Kaminari Denki: yep!

You: okiii sounds like a plan then

Kaminari Denki: cool

You: i get off work at 3pm so let’s just meet then?

Kaminari Denki: 👍

____

Direct Message

Kaminari: omfg sero ur forgiven for ripping my poster

Sero Brain Cells: HOORAY

Kaminari: im meeting w him tomorrow Ψ(`_´ # )↝

Sero Brain Cells: niiiiice!!

Kaminari: i'm so scared

Sero Brain Cells: what why

Kaminari: i'm scaredddd

Sero Brain Cells: okay okay don’t freak out

Sero Brain Cells: have you picked out an outfit?

Kaminari: nope

Sero Brain Cells: okay so here’s what we’ll do. I’ll meet u at ur place tn and i’ll help u pick out something to wear

Kaminari: and i’ll order food

Sero Brain Cells: YES NOW U GET IT

____

You throw your phone on the couch and bury your head in your hands. Your heart is racing at the thought of seeing Kaminari again. You have to pause and take a deep breath to calm yourself down. Thankfully, you have the rest of today to spend freaking about and picking out ten different outfits that you’ll never wear.

As for right now, though… It’s time to distract yourself. You pull up a Youtube video and resolutely pretend not to think about your date tomorrow.

____

thx for reading <33333

tagging: @tejas-kris and @felmierr :0

#defectivevillain #kaminari x reader #kaminari x male reader #bnha x reader #bnha x male reader #male reader #masc reader #yuh yuh #transmasc reader #ig #I mean I'm transmasc so #yeah that counts

72 notes · View notes

jedi-starbird · 3 months

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Time Travel is my favourite trope and I think we need more fics where both Obi-Wan AND Qui-Gon time travel together because no matter when they get sent it's chaos. They're saving the galaxy and being physic flash-bangs to everyone around them.

like before Bandomeer?

The entire council is baffled to watch as Qui-Gon 'never taking a padawan again' Jinn has suddenly cut off his post-Xanatos depression tour to return to the temple and beeline to the creche with a frantic energy. His wild eyes immediately single out a fluffy, red-haired initiate.

"You." he exhales with a pointed finger, slightly ominous as he towers over the child. Said child starts vibrating with delight. "Me." he agrees, launching himself at the man. Qui-Gon drops to his knees with a thud that cannot be healthy. Obi-Wan's attempts to clamber into Qui-Gon's robes and maybe onto his shoulders is thwarted by the fact that Qui-Gon's massive hands are cupping Obi-Wan's tiny squishy cheeks. He stares at the initiate for a few minutes with an intensity that is starting to worry people.

Finally, "You're so small." Qui-Gon sounds like he might cry.

'What the fuck?' Plo Koon projects at Mace.

"I'm 9! That tends to be the case!" the child chirps back.

"You're nine." Oh. Ah. Qui-Gon's eyes are distinctively misty. He squishes the boy in a hug so hard he squeaks. Mace makes a series of gestures that imply the need for a head-scan. Depa obligingly drifts off towards the halls. Qui-Gon scoops the child up onto his hip and claims him as his padawan on the spot. The assorted council members and creche-masters burst into noise. Mace tells Depa to bring some space ibuprofen as well.

after Naboo?

Anakin is a little apprehensive of his place in both the order and Obi-Wan's life, but then one day Obi-Wan wakes up and is suddenly a lot less sad in the force?? In fact, if Anakin didn't know better he'd say he was almost giddy, but he's watched Obi-Wan try to pretend his world hasn't fallen apart for the past few months so it can't be that, right? And um, Miss Bant? He knows grief is a funny thing that affects people differently but he's pretty sure 'massive mood swing' and 'having full conversations with invisible people' is not...great? and you said to tell you if Obi-Wan got really weird in any way.

Anyway after a lot of medical exams, intense consultation with the archives, and a couple exorcisms, Anakin ends up being raised by his 'real' master and his ghost master. He is far more well adjusted emotionally and far less well adjusted for what counts as normal people behavior(not talking to thin air). When questioned on this, all he ever says is that he's talking to Qui-Gon. Isn't he...dead? Well, yes. Wait, he's a ghost? Ghosts are real? ...Well this ghost is real.

This starts a great number of existential crises among non-force sensitives and incredibly heated theological arguments amongst the Jedi. Whenever Obi-Wan is questioned on this, all he ever says is some variation of "the force got to know him for 5 seconds and kicked him back out." Mace backs him up on this even though that reasoning is technically blasphemous. Qui-Gon is having the time of his un-life. He's ascended to his final form, his sheer existence is a heresy, this is truly all he has ever aspired towards.

the Clone Wars?

The minute they get dropped back Qui-Gon immediately goes and haunts the shit out of Dooku. They have a signed terms of surrender and promise of info on the Sith Lord within the year. Only half of it is because Qui-Gon's giving Dooku complexes that are only perceptible to shrimp, the other half is because they now have a ghost spy that is not bound by the laws of physics nor spacetime.

Obi-Wan only nominally pays attention to this as he immediately goes and implements his 19 step seduction plan with Cody (he had to focus on something on Tatooine to pass the time). It fails. Spectacularly. Publicly. Ah right. Tatooine was not exactly the height of his sanity. Everyone in the GAR and temple is now riveted by High General and Councilor Obi-Wan Kenobi's attempts to go on a date with his Commander, who bats him away him like a particularly annoying stray and seems one bouquet of cactus away from committing mutiny. Anakin is worrying if it means his master knows about his secret marriage and this is some sort of really weird power play. (It is, but not in the way he thinks)

The next time Dooku goes after Obi-Wan, Qui-Gon spends a good few months appearing tear-stained at the edge of Dooku's perception and only communicating in terrible wails and discordant mutterings of 'padawan. my padawan. my little one.' 24/7.

"Wait, you're annoying Dooku into surrendering?"

"Oh no Anakin, we're crushing his psyche like a bug. :)"