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negativecharm · 5 months

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A little Overprotective Boyfriend Simon anyone?

He's manipulative obviously but he makes it harder for you to argue with him.

"You don't know it love do you? You're too pretty for that. What's 'just a friend' between a man and a woman?? And those chicks that hang around? Do you think they'll be here if you don't got something they can use?"

He's basically reducing you from your natural self because he's a crazy mf who you just wants you for himself but he fails to have that when you're just being you.

Conversations like that with him is hell if you're an emotionally sensitive person. You get all choked up when he softens the tone so you'll stick to standing there, taking his words in, stiff from how furious you are until tears well in your eyes and your breath start shuddering like a stupid child who's not getting their way.

He's suddenly all yours when he sees the tears, arms wrapped tightly around your form swaying slightly like he's disciplining a child now tired from throwing a temper tantrum.

Again, after quieting you down he hit you with a "It's not you that I don't trust." The way you're still in his embrace is plain enough for him to understand that you're just giving up because you know you should never target for something that you can never take on. Not when you're the type to cry when you're angry no.

He lies to himself saying he doesn't like doing any part of it because of your tears and with how upset you are but there isn't anything a long embrace in that same standing position and a little baby talk can't fix. By fixing I meant his own guilt. That hollowed out part was never there when he's finished. He knows you melt for him. He knows his commanding sweet talk plus his authoritative personality is one of the first things you melt for him because clearly you got issues from the starting point. He knows you're a hazard to yourself and chose him for that same reason.

It's like a game because it's quiet unnerving for him to think that one day you might develop something in you that he won't notice and deny it all like his efforts to keep you are nothing. But the fear stops when he feels your hands slowly crawl up from his wasitline and hug him back. It's endless. He always gets what he wants because you're so easy for him to make it possible.

#i need psychological evaluation #hades writes #simon ghost riley #call of duty #cod headcanons #cod #ghost call of duty #simon riley headcanons #simon ghost riley x reader #cod hcs #cod x reader #simon riley call of duty #simon riley imagine

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mildew-dread-mold · 1 year

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there were probably fanfics on tumblr and ao3 or whatever in the aftg universe for the foxes and other exy figures. with weird ships between them, all that jazz.

i like to think they just got together on occassion to read shit. everyone sitting in a circle, nicky has ao3 open and is reading off the tags, "the title is from a harry styles song, the ship is dan and aaron, the tags are- oh shit- omegaverse, anal fisting, cock tattoo? and it's 12k words long."

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suddencolds · 4 months

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people who write long fics who somehow manage to keep the sneeze/symptom descriptions feeling fresh throughout and not repetitive - please teach me your ways 🤯

#i only know of so many mannerisms...#i only have a finite number of symptom descriptions to draw from...#trying so hard to not feel like i'm just repeating myself but #somehow this latest chapter is proving to be v difficult to write #semi unrelated but #even after spending 3 years getting a minor in creative writing i somehow cannot approach revision in #a normal way... having to go into a scene to add more and rearrange things then having the evaluate whether the end result still flows is #excruciating to me and i more often than not skimp out on that process entirely by just rewriting a scene from scratch instead of properly #doing revision 😭 but i do not have the energy to rewrite all of chapter 3 so #let's see

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wrylu · 2 months

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idk why i'm so moody these days but i find my despair funny

aka my average day as of now

#1. impulsive silly thoughts #2. STOP FORGETTING TO EAT!!!!!!!!!!!!1 please :3 (note for myself me myself and i)#3. i get sad 🥱#4. tired #(tumblr deleted half of my tags. isnt that nice though you wont have to listen to my essay of vents nobody wanted to hear that)#vent art #wrylu #lu's canvas #negative thoughts below :) have some flowers 💐#sometimes i feel like i should get up more and spend time with my family i miss how it used to be #but you know what i suck and im practically glued to my chair and im lazy like if i was one of the 7 deadly sins i would be sloth #im surprised im not dead yet #this is purely for myself to speak my poor mind #no i actually hate this #i wanna die #i wish i was dead #not really #but still #i wish time just stopped so i can re evaluate my life #and whoa damn dysphoria makes an appearance ever #i wish i had a schlong (funny)#this is awful #sometimes i feel manipulative like i switch my emotions and personalities so hard #am i manipulating you guys??#i feel like im being sad for attention #ugh i hate that the internet is my comfort #thats bad isnt it #i feel like an attention seeker #why am i even writing this 🥱🥱#i cant wait to fall asleep forever

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sepublic · 4 months

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“A sToRy iS OnLy aS GoOd aS ItS viLLaIn!!!”

#I always found this statement to be a reductive and arbitrary way to evaluate media said by people who didn’t pay attention in English clas #writing #reading comprehension #fandom critical

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ivystitches · 1 year

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zava behaving exactly the same way as jamie did in season 1 minus the constant bullying and being treated like a king. jamie being taught to be "one of 11" out on the pitch and zava being allowed (and even encouraged) to be the only one that actually matters

#obviously a lot of that has to do with the fact that jamie was a dick too #whereas zava seems to portray more of a team first personality (even though he's obviously anything but that)#I know that the show will have the boys turn against the status quo currently #and push the coaching team to re evaluate their strategies and their general mindset #but it seems a bit odd to me that ted let this fly at all #or even roy for that matter?#roy was always open about the fact that he thought jamie was super talented but he never put up with jamie's shit #this particular writing choice is bugging me for reasons I cant fully articulate yet #ted lasso #zava #jamie tartt #roy kent #ted lasso spoilers #coach beard #sam obisanya

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zerozeroren · 4 months

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Welp, time for the annual art summary

#art summary #i was going to write an entire wall of text to kind of evaluate what happened that year but i lost the plot by sentence 3 #in a way it's a perfect representation of this year #I'd appreciate any comments on my art progress/regress #i started to do more comics (surprisingly) and that's the only thing i myself can say about my art this year

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jamneuromain · 1 year

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Dancing in the Daydream

Andy Barber x You (Reader), no use of Y/N

Alternate Universe - College AU

Summary: Andy Barber is the lecturer for your class Creative Writing.

Warning: Smut, 18+

A/N: ideas sponsored by me and @rogerswifesblog, who comes up with many amazing plots and conversations used in this series😘😘😘❤️❤️❤️

Fluff: 💕 Angst: 🥀 Smut: 🔥 Dark: 🌑

In Time Order:

Creative Writing: You're a renowned author who's still going to school. Annoyingly, your English teacher is reading way too deeply into your books. 🥀💕

Straight-A Student: You argue with Andy, during your ninth date. 🔥💕

Wishful Thinking: A new semester. A new task. A new boyfriend, your previous professor, Andy Barber. Everything seems to be going on the right track. So why didn't it? 🥀🌑🔥💕 (newly updated

Water Bottle, Straw, and Lip Gloss: Andy thought of ways of enforcing his rule of "drinking water" to you... would you be glad to accept it? 💕

Evaluating Your Work: You return home with Andy reading your... stuff. 💕🔥

Being Mutuals: Andy is so curious about the detective AU that he just has to ask… 💕

All That's Inspiring: What would Andy do if he finds out that you break your promise with him. 🔥💕

No Use Running: What are you going to do when Andy is mad at you? 🥀🌑🔥

Brat Taming: You need to be put down. 🔥💕

Deja vu: A student plagiarised your work for her assignment. 💕

Taking a Bear by the Tooth: You are facetiming with Andy when you realized... 💕

Gamer? Cheater! Drabble: You have decided to settle the argument by playing Mario Cart. 💕

#andy barber #andy barber smut #andy barber x you #andy barber x reader #andy barber x female reader #defending jacob #professor andy barber #student reader #creative writing #dancing in the daydream #evaluating your work #no use running #being mutuals #andy barber fluff #straight a student #andy barber angst #wishful thinking #taking a bear by the tooth #all that's inspiring

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so-why-let-your-voice-be-tamed · 4 months

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2023 writing self evaluation

I was tagged by the lovely @neondiamond, thank you!! I was also almost tagged by @lululawrence who texted me but I was already asleep lol.

1. List of works published this year:

In order of posting, these are the 17 fics I published:

April: saw some things on the other side [61K, Larry, written for @onedirectionbigbang]

May: (now I realize that the world outside) it's bigger than me [3,5K, written for @faithinthefutureficfest]

let's get naked and explore (our inner secrets) [8K, Zouis, written for @wankersday]

June: the missing piece that makes me fit [17K, Zouiam, written for @zouisfics]

we will get another day (to begin again) [1,8K, Ziam]

July: rain makes the flowers grow [1,1K, Larry, ficlet friday]

a life that's lived without you [1,1K, Ziam, ficlet friday]

August: and there's no one to blame [1,8K, Larry, ficlet friday]

You don't have to say "I love you", to say I love you [1,5K, ficlet friday]

I'm falling again [2,2K, Larry, ficlet friday]

like a moth into a flame [5,4K, Zouis, written for @wordplayfics]

September: I'll Run (Run to You) [1,1K, Larry, written for @wordplayfics]

like a bridge over troubled water (I will lay me down) [6,4K, written for @wordplayfics]

(don't you ever) hope for something else [5,4K, Ziam, written for @wordplayfics)

you try to stop it tumbling (but on and on it goes) [2,7K, Lirry, written for @wordplayfics]

October: when love gets involved [666, Larry, written for @1dtrickortreatfest]

find a way (to send me a sign) [666, Larry, written for @1dtrickortreatfest]

December: Santa Baby (one little thing I really need) [3K, Larry, written for @parmahamlarrie for the @1dcreatorclubhouse holiday exchange]

In total, including works that I haven't published yet, I've written 129.843 words in 2023.

2. Work you are most proud of (and why):

I always really struggle with my Big Bang, and this year was no different. There was a lot of math involved, and a lot of schedules to make sure that the time travel all worked and the dates were accurate. I am really proud of how it turned out though, and the art (by the wonderful @monpetithl) is absolutely stunning.

3. Work you are least proud of (and why):

I suppose by default I'm 'least proud' of some fics, since I'm more proud of others, but in general, I'm very proud of everything I published this year.

4. A favorite excerpt of your writing:

This is from (now I realize that the world outside) it's bigger than me

His throat feels dry and his face looks flushed, and there’s a moment where he contemplates dunking his head under the tap, but he doesn’t want to keep the fans waiting, even if he knows that his band is excellent at keeping the crowd entertained.

Or at least, they usually are. But right now, heading through the hallway back to the stage, all he can hear is silence.

Louis feels his heartbeat kick up a notch, and even though he knows that it’s ridiculous and highly implausible, there’s a brief moment where he wonders if everyone has just up and left. Maybe they’ve had enough. Maybe they only came here to see if he was willing to confirm the rumours, and now that he hasn’t, they’re leaving.

His palms are sweating, making him wipe them on his jeans, and it’s only when the band starts playing the intro to Bigger Than Me that they had come up with for the tour that Louis has the courage to step back onto the stage.

He has just opened his mouth for the first line – when somebody told me I would change – when it sinks in what he’s looking at.

Where the crowd is usually colourful, little rainbow flags showing up throughout the songs, or being held up en masse during a fan project for Only the Brave, it’s almost muted now, blacks and whites and greys.

And purple.

It is a sea of flags. A sea of ace flags.

Louis is vaguely aware that the band has started the intro for the third time. He can hear the cheers, the chants, can see the banners that are being held up by people on the balcony. We love you Louis, they read. We need you and you’ve got us.

His blood is rushing through his ears and he’s pretty sure he’s about two seconds from crying, and there is no way in hell that he’s going to be able to sing this song right now. It’s not even because it’s one of the harder songs in his set and he can feel his throat closing up. But he feels like he needs to acknowledge this. Because while he might not acknowledge it in the press, might play coy, these are his fans. These are the people that get him. The people that understand and support and love him, and they’re right. He’s got them. No matter what else, he’s got these people in his corner.

5. Share or describe a favorite review you received:

So my favourite review wasn't actually written. It was a friend of mine, at the concert in Paris, locking eyes with me during Bigger Than Me, and the two of us sharing a moment because we knew.

6. A time when writing was really, really hard:

Honestly, a lot of the year. I've written on something every month, but I've had months where I barely made 5K, if that. I've also had periods where my health was just utterly shit, and periods where I was too busy (like in November, which I mostly spent hanging out with the amazing @chaotic-bells)

7. A scene or character you wrote that surprised you:

Well, it is written but not published, but something happened in my Big Bang for 2024 where I was like "really?? this is what you're going with??" and I guess you'll have to find that moment in my fic when it posts.

8. How did you grow as a writer this year:

I'm honestly not sure I did, though I feel like I wrote a lot more short fics this year, so I suppose in that regard I grew by being able to write shorter things.

9. How do you hope to grow next year:

I mostly just hope to continue being able to write, continue loving writing, because for a while this year I wasn't sure if I wanted to continue being a writer in this fandom. But I got lovingly told that there was no way I wasn't doing the Big Bang next year, and then I got matched up with an amazing artist (hiii @whatagreatproblemtohave!) so that definitely helped in getting my mojo back.

10. Who was your greatest positive influence this year as a writer (could be another writer or beta or cheerleader or muse etc etc):

I had wonderful guidance in the form of @londonfoginacup who told me a) you are not dropping out of the big bang and b) how about you rewrite the fic in Zayn's perspective, which has helped A LOT. I've also had an absolutely wonderful friend in @beardyboyzx who has read through a lot of my fics, has offered advice, a sounding board, and anything I could ask for. My beta, as always, is the wonderful @foullovehideout who is just the best person I could ask for. I had such a wonderful time seeing them again this year too.

And then there's the people that I've written with! Most notably, @jacaranda-bloom who is my standard writing buddy, though we've not been able to write together as often as last year, she's still helped me stay committed to my writing and I wouldn't have been able to publish as many fics if it weren't for our sprints.

Lastly, there's the beautiful people from the @1dcreatorclubhouse who have been just wonderful and a great source of joy and comfort.

11. Anything from your real life show up in your writing this year:

Honestly it always does. Mostly this year in the aro/ace characters, because they are me and I am them.

12. Any new wisdom you can share with other writers:

I don't think it's new, really, but a) write what you want to write and b) don't forget that writing is a muscle, it needs to be trained just like anything else. You can't expect the same ease that you felt while writing daily when you end up not having been able to write for a while. Give yourself grace, and above all, believe in yourself and the stories you want to tell. They'll be loved by so many people!

13. Any projects you’re looking forward to starting (or finishing) in the new year:

Definitely my Big Bang for 2024. It's a struggle and really outside of my wheelhouse, but I'm excited to see where it ends up going. I am also super intrigued by the possible 1daroacefest that @red-pandaaa was running a poll for (you can vote here) so depending on when it runs I definitely want to participate. And I'm thinking I might dabble in some F1 fic next year!

14. Tag three writers whose answers you’d like to read. ;)

I am going to tag the wonderful @beardyboyzx because I need to read their answers. And I am tagging @voulezloux and @reminiscingintherain too!

#2023 writing round up #2023 writing self evaluation

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acornsandoaktrees · 5 months

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so, Greenwood cats.

(hear me out, hear me out)

Norwegian Forest Cats:

larger and more powerful than most domesticated housecats, they're adapted to colder climates, with very thick and long fur. they take 5 years to fully mature. as the name implies, before domestication they occupied Scandinavian forests

Ocelots:

on all fours adults come up to a human's knees. historically, they were sometimes kept as pets by Aztecs and Incans. they take 2 years to fully mature. they're active at twilight and night, and live solitary. they require dense foliage cover, which often means forests

etymology:

while The Hobbit's Mirkwood is not the only instance of the name, Tolkien has admitted its roots to be in early German, Old English, Old Swedish and Old Norse

the Old Norse word for a domestic cat (tom-cat specifically, but isn't it always) is köttr. in terms of lotr-invented animals, Warg is drawn directly from the Old Norse word for wolf, vargr

(side-note: Teldivo was a giant black cat in Tolkien's early development of lotr, later replaced by Sauron, so the idea of Big Version of Real Animal wasn't lost on him)

and what does this all amount to, you ask?

well, that quite neatly for a fantasy world, Greenwood's forests could feasibly be inhabited by large wild-cats known as Kottur.

(as decided by the author of this post, who has a frightenly loose concept of deriving words from others lol)

and with that said, here's a fun fact about Norse tradition: cats were often given as wedding gifts to brides. this was done to honour Freyja, the goddess of love and fertility, whose chariot was pulled by... Norwegian Forest Cats! who would've guessed

also want to add that -- as i've said before but a while ago -- i don't put much stock in elves marrying. they just... live too long for that kind of monogamous commitment. 'til death do us part' doesn't really carry much weight, does it? however, i am willing to say that some elves choose to 'bond' with one another, sort of entertwining their lives without the rather daunting promise of a singular eternity. and yes, polyamoury and divorce. again, they live too damn long for the expectation of one partner in an entire population to be sensical

so to bring this together, here's my concept:

newly bonded Greenwood elves sometimes gift their partners a Kottur kitten, not to be luxuriously treasured pets but to act as hunting companions and protectors. considering Silvans' deep bond with nature, it's plausible, no?

(kittens only, because once Kottur start hitting maturity it becomes nigh impossible to train them)

#ive delayed this post so long because i didnt have the energy to write and present it like this #and i do so when ive got my written evaluation of my college project due tuesday that im too tired to tackle yet???#lotr #the hobbit #tolkien #tolkien elves #aaotverse #acorns and oak trees #lotr au #tolkien worldbuilding #fantasy animal #aaot rambling

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1lostsoul0fishbowl · 4 months

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annual writing self-evaluation 📝

Many thanks and muchas smooches to @justhere4thevibez for tagging me! 🥰

1. List of works published this year (in no particular order):

chapters 56-84 of With a Little Help From My Friends (completed 5/15/23)

Next Time I Fall (24 chapters, completed 12/19/23)

Lost and Found and Turned Around (7 chapters, completed 11/16/23)

2. Work you are most proud of (and why):

I’m incredibly proud of all my works, but I think probably I’m most proud of Next Time I Fall. I created a brand new rarepair, shaped a beautiful fluffy love story for them, and persevered through extreme personal difficulty to finish the fic despite the temptation to abandon it.

3. Work you are least proud of (and why):

There are a couple of chapters in Little Help that I feel aren’t as strong as they could’ve been. 64, 73, and 81 in particular. I don’t know what I should’ve done to make them better; I just know they needed more.

4. A favorite excerpt of your writing:

I’ll pick one little snippet from each fic…

Little Help:

Wayne waited until she’d finished her tiny blueberry slice and was debating over which to try next. “Actually, sugar,” he said quietly to Max, “I wanted to talk to you about that.”

“About what?” she asked, puzzled. “About gaining weight? That was a joke.”

“No.” He watched Eddie let Lucy lick a tiny smear of pie filling from his finger, despite Chrissy’s protest that sugar wasn’t good for cats. “About staying with us.”

A chill ran through her. “It’s still okay, right?” she said hesitantly. “My mom’s getting out of the rehab next week, but Claudia said I could stay longer if I needed to. But if that’s changed…” She trailed off, swallowing hard.

Wayne patted her shoulder. “Naw, sugar, that ain’t changed. You can stay long as you like. Fact is”— he rubbed the back of his neck, suddenly bashful— “fact is, what we really want is to keep you for good.”

~~~

Next Time I Fall:

Gareth couldn’t imagine having to grow up without his mom and dad. He thought of the way Janie held so tightly to his mom every time they hugged, and a lump formed in his throat.

“They never found your parents?” he whispered. “Baby, I’m so sorry.”

Honestly, he hadn’t even thought before speaking, he’d just blurted that out. But somehow it had been the right thing to say; Eddie and Chrissy’s tense expressions melted into something that looked like relief, and Janie’s crushing grip on his hand finally relaxed a little. Gareth laced his fingers through hers, giving her hand a little squeeze, before gently turning it to examine the small number tattooed on the inside of her wrist.

“Is that where this came from?” He lifted her hand to his lips, softly kissing the tiny 011. “Did they do that to you in the Lab?”

She nodded, tears spilling down her cheeks. “It was my name,” she murmured. “That is why everyone calls me El. El is short for Eleven.”

Fucking hell. Gareth felt tears running down his cheeks, too.

~~~

Lost and Found:

“Jane, you need to wake up!” Kali tried unsuccessfully not to shout. “You really are naive! They can always take you if they really want you. You need to face facts. Your policeman cannot protect you, you have to be able to protect yourself. Are your friends helping you with that? Is your boyfriend? No, they just want you to be ‘normal’. They want you to suppress your gifts instead of using them, and they want you to forget who you are and where you came from. And if I stay here they’ll do the same to me. Putting on their hypocritical smiles as long as I convert to their idea of normal. I don’t want to hide who I am, and neither should you, Jane. You can’t heal by hiding. The only way to heal is to face up to the truth, confront and conquer your past.”

“Stop calling me naive,” Jane snapped, “just because I am trying to accept my past instead of confronting it. I confronted Papa face to face, and then I let him die, and it did not change anything. All your revenge has not changed you either.” Just as quickly as her anger flared up, it dissipated again. Her voice softened, her entire demeanor settling into something more gentle. “You talk a lot about healing, but you are still so mad, Kali. I think I am more healed than you are. Maybe if you stayed here, as part of my family, maybe that can heal you like it did for me.”

5. Share or describe a favorite comment you received:

I love every single comment I get, truly I do. But I think the ones that made me smile the most this year were the few on Next Time I Fall that basically said ‘I never would’ve considered El and Gareth together but your fic made me ship them’. Is there any greater compliment? 😄

6. A time when writing was really, really hard:

Basically the last eight weeks have been awful. I got covid, and had barely recovered from that when a family emergency happened and I was thrown into the role of caregiver, and since then just more and more stuff keeps going wrong. I’m exhausted and honestly in a pretty dark place, mentally and emotionally, right now.

And yet. In spite of that I finished both Next Time and Lost and Found. Neither of them seem to have made any great impact— I barely even got any comments on either finale— but it was a goal of mine to finish them both and I’m still proud I managed to achieve that.

7. A scene or character you wrote that surprised you:

Kali, in Lost and Found, was so much fun to explore! I rewatched “The Lost Sister” before I started writing this fic, and I realized that I still hated her obnoxious friends but Kali herself was a super interesting character with a lot of potential. I had a lot of fun digging into what might possibly make her want to reconnect with El, and what would make her feel drawn to Steve. Also it surprised me how much I ship Stali now!

8. How did you grow as a writer this year:

I learned that my stories come out better when I write them the way I want them, instead of “taking requests” and pushing the characters in directions I wouldn’t have chosen if left to my own devices. I feel like certain parts of Little Help suffered because of this, so I resolved I’d stick to my own plans for Next Time and later Lost and Found, and I think those two fics came out better for it.

9. How do you hope to grow next year:

Next year, if I write any more, I want to somehow learn not to be so obsessed with stats. Stop comparing my kudos/comments count to other fics and feeling sad and inadequate. I have no idea how to accomplish this, but it’s where I need to be if I’m going to keep writing.

10. Who was your greatest positive influence this year as a writer (could be another writer or beta or cheerleader or muse etc etc):

Oh it’s 1000% @pearlypairings — she’s been all of the above for me and so much more! Lost and Found would never have happened without her, and Next Time would likely have been abandoned unfinished.

11. Anything in your real life show up in your writing this year:

Lots of things, yeah, I don’t think I can help adding little bits and pieces of myself to my stories. I write the kind of world I’d like to see, and populate it with characters I either want to be like or wish I’d had in my own life.

A very silly specific example, though, is that I made Eddie adopt a kitten because I lost my cat last year and I missed her so much.

12. Any new wisdom you can share with other writers:

Um. Not really? I don’t think I’m good enough yet to be passing on wisdom to others!!!

13. Any new projects you’re looking forward to starting (or finishing) in the new year:

I have a couple fun ideas jotted down in my Plot Bunnies folder, but no definite plans to start anything new right now. I gotta get out of this awful headspace before I can even think about new projects.

14. Tag three writers/artists whose answers you’d like to read:

@sokkas-first-fangirl @bratanimus @slowandsteddie

#losty writes #annual writing self evaluation #writer games #dash games #ao3 writer

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lululawrence · 4 months

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Annual Writing Self-Evaluation 2023

Thank you for tagging me @allwaswell16! I am so happy every year that this (I believe) brainchild of @juliusschmidt's from 2016 still exists in various forms! hehe I apparently missed doing this in 2021 and 2022, and I was determined not to miss it again so here we go!

List of works published this year: My Other Half Was You Gemma's Dad (Could Use A Guy Like Me) Quite the Pickle Livin' In A Daydream (Gimme a Solution and) Watch Me Run With It You Are A Song Did You Know I Fit In A Dryer? Were You There On That Christmas Night? Team Gaelic FTW No Constraints Odds Are That We Will Probably Be... Damsel in Christmas Distress Snow In Love

Work you are most proud of (and why): Oof. This is always such a hard question to answer. Almost as hard as the next one, and the next one and the next one....... hah honestly though, I think... I'm honestly sincerely proud of most of my fics from this year simply because I got them written. I'll go more into that later, I'm sure, but maybe... I think maybe My Other Half Was You or Odds Are That We Will Probably Be... and for very different reasons. My Other Half Was You was written based on artwork by @moon-sun-thyme for @1dreversebang and the moment I saw her artwork I had these vague ideas coming to mind and I am quite proud with how I was able to bring them to life so closely resembling what I originally thought of when I saw the art. And for Odds Are, I wrote that for @1dtrickortreatfest so it had to be exactly 666 words and that's always a trick (heh), but in this case I had to completely world build and set up the situation and lead everyone to the conclusion within that word count while making it somewhat compelling... and I think I was able to manage it. I hope I was, anyway haha

Work you are least proud of (and why): lmaooooo usually this answer is really hard for me to answer, but this year it's not haha i have a few fics that I literally wrote to just remind myself that I could. That not everything has to be thought out and polished and pretty, sometimes it's just a matter of getting words on paper and putting them out into the world immediately, hoping for the best, and they absolutely served their purpose! I'm fond of them still, but that doesn't mean I'm proud of them necessarily haha So I would have to say Damsel in Christmas Distress (which I still love dearly, simply for how self indulgent that silly thing is for me haha) and Quite the Pickle. Again, my darling Stylinshaw fics getting the brunt of it here, but they did as they needed to for me. I'll maybe try to write them a longer, more polished fic with some thought behind it this year, as they clearly deserve.

A favorite excerpt of your writing: GAHHHH I hate this question every damn time! Okay, I don't know if this is my absolute favorite thing I wrote this year, BUT it immediately came to mind, and I do very much like it so, here's an excerpt from Gemma's Dad (Could Use A Guy Like Me). I just adore Harry being a fumbling idiot around a pretty boy hahaha Ever since he had dug up his garden, he preferred to start in the back where the job was a lot more complicated to work around and then move to the front, which was far easier. Now, though, Harry was wondering if this was the right decision because Louis was also mowing his lawn. That wasn’t a problem, of course, except he was shirtless and that only defined for Harry the fact he really had grown up. Louis used to try to show off for the neighborhood by mowing any number of lawns shirtless in middle school and high school, but he had been a scrawny kid with little to no meat on his bones and Harry had thought it adorable back then. Now, on a sweltering day like it was, he was probably shirtless just to be as cool as possible as the sun beat down on him, and Harry’s vision wasn’t as good as it used to be, but he could still tell that Louis had filled out since going to college. He was still a thin man, but as he pushed the mower through the tall grass, Harry could see the muscles he clearly put effort into. Add to it the chest hair that was only growing darker as he continued to sweat and the smattering of tattoos he’d gotten since he turned eighteen and it was clear he had grown up. Harry couldn’t help it when the glint of the sun off Louis’ sweaty skin made him lick his lips without even thinking. Clearing his throat and thankful it was obvious Louis was too focused to notice Harry ogling him from his own yard, Harry pulled the starter and began to work on his own yard.

Share or describe a favorite review you received: I've got three that immediately came to mind, so excuse me while I mention all three as quickly as I can manage lol First was from @allwaswell16 for Gemma's Dad. I'd had a lot of difficulty with a someone reading motivations and meaning in the characters and story that I took a lot of care in ensuring were actually avoided as I wrote it. There were a lot of pitfalls I could have fallen into when writing the fic, but one person just kept asking over and over again for things I thought I had already done and my beta assured me I had sufficiently covered etc, but I still worried so when Anitra gave the review she did of it on her podcast, it literally made me cry a little bit lol Second was @londonfoginacup in response to (Gimme a Solution and) Watch Me Run With It when she commented "Ah so you really just tore your chest open and picked out your beating heart and handed it to me here, didn’t you" because... well I hadn't really considered it when I'd been writing the fic, but I guess I kind of did exactly that, yeah. haha And then lastly I want to thank @tommokat for their lovely comments on Snow In Love regarding the Michigan geography and freak lake effect snow that can be experienced there because I tried my very best to describe the absolute chaos that is that region in the wintertime and they basically affirmed that I had accurately captured it. Genuinely, the best gift I could have gotten haha

A time when writing was really, really hard: Excuse me while I laugh a bit hysterically until I cry alksdhglskfja The last year or two have been incredibly difficult for a whole host of reasons, but the ones that most affected my writing were my lingering (and seemingly unending) burnout combined with an absolute lack of time/energy available to write. There were so many times this year that I thought I wouldn't be able to do it or thought I'd have to pull out of various fests and just... cut down on things, but I kept pushing and kept trying and I did it. I'm so fucking proud of myself, honestly.

A scene or character you wrote that surprised you: Jordan North in Did You Know I Fit In A Dryer? Well, honestly, Louis in that fic too. And the entire premise of the fic. Really all of it surprised me lololol I never expected to write Jordan in a fic. Ever. hahahaa And as I've barely dabbled in a couple of weed candies is all, I certainly did not anticipate ever writing someone as THAT HIGH. sooooo...yeah just all of it hahaha

How did you grow as a writer this year: Psh. Bold of you to assume I've grown as a writer this year when I was merely doing what I could to survive haha if anything I kind of wonder if I went backwards in my writing abilities but who the fuck knows, really haha

How do you hope to grow next year: I just... I dunno man. I just kinda hope I'm in a better place this time next year so I'm just not so fucking tired all the time and so I have actual time to write, you know? lol continued good vibes are always welcome here, folks haha

Who was your greatest positive influence this year as a writer (could be another writer or beta or cheerleader or muse etc etc): Like... everyone. hah I'm getting a little emotional thinking of everyone who helped me keep going this year. but the greatest? probably @londonfoginacup again. She was the biggest influence in actually getting my Big Bang finished because I didn't want to disappoint her (even though?? I know I won't??? like.. anyway) haha and then I wrote like three fics for her/dedicated them to her just because... like. she keeps me going some days honestly so yeah. Emmu. You're the bestest always babes. Love you.

Anything from your real life show up in your writing this year: Listen, all I'm saying is in one of my fics it hits a little too close to home. Like I kind of wrote Harry's starting place... and kinda where he is for a lot of the fic... pretty much exactly how I was feeling, and still pretty much am, though for very different reasons. So it's maybe a little too much of my real life emotionally speaking in there yeah

Any new wisdom you can share with other writers: New? Not so much hahaha just don't give up!

Any new projects you're looking forward to starting (or finishing) in the new year: YES. I was just talking with @moon-sun-thyme this morning that I started the year by posting a fic based on her art, and I'm going out of this year focusing on the fic we will be collaborating on together for the @onedirectionbigbang hehe so I'm very very excited to get started on that one. It's a fic I've been wanting to write almost ever since I first heard the song Satellite, so I am READY to delve in and lose myself to it, honestly. In the whole... one night every week or two I have to write. hahaha Here's hoping I make the deadline haaaaa

Tag three writers whose answers you'd like to read: MAN I have no idea who has and hasn't done this yet! So maybeeeee @justanothershadeofblue, @hellolovers13, anddddd @quotefromthatshow and @louandhazaf if you haven't done it already and want to! And shh I know it’s four but who cares lolol

*All answers should be about fics posted in 2023

Past Years: 2016 | 2017 | 2018 | 2019 | 2020 and 2020 | 2022(ish)

#annual writing self evaluation #writing stuff #about me #2023 in writing #i'm trying to tag it using all the things i tried searching as i went looking for my old ones #the fact i can't find a 2021 one when i swear i did one is frustrating but whatever lol #hope this works and i can find it next year hahaha #i also can't believe i've done these going back to 2016 that is WILD lol #okay enjoy y'all love you bye

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exhausted-archivist · 4 months

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In regards to my last reblog on the scale of Thedas, latitude and stuff. I’ve been thinking about how much thought I give all this. Especially because this topic is one I’ve been talking with a lot of people about lately. It crops up a lot with people who, like me enjoy natural world building or are fanfic writers. Or really anyone who sits down and reads the lore at length. More times then not the question of Thedas’s scale comes up.

So, I want to establish I am very well aware that I’m likely giving it more thought than the devs. I have that luxury as a fan and consumer of the series. It is extremely relevant for me because I like making maps for the series, plotting out travel paths, and scaling things for da ttrpg campaigns I write.

So because I think about it a lot, I notice all the many different scales of Thedas in terms of travel time. How the scale they gave the ttrpg doesn’t match up with any scale they established in the main games or books. I think if the devs sat down and thought about establishing a standard scale and also considering just basic stuff we also wouldn’t have the Deep Roads be 2-4 miles / 3.21-6.43 km below sea level and display a lack of geothermal qualities. I think they’d consider how they built a world with at least 9.1 million people and tons of mega fauna such as giants and dragons and 14’/4.26 m tall bears that hunt dragons, all squished into roughly 1/4 of Europe and how much that isn’t really sustainable. How there would be much more impact if nature encroachment in civilization and how common things like that would be in places. Which they do consider it to a degree, I’m not saying they don’t. But I think if they thought about it just to make the world something that holds up a little better to idle musings, it wouldn’t be a bad thing. That the world would feel more real and alive and also narratively give them more to work with.

The contradictions and lack of consideration for the natural world has always been one of my critiques of Dragon Age, among other things. The reason why that is, is mostly because of a noticeable trend the lack of natural world building in fantasy. It’s a topic that has been discussed elsewhere and at length by other people, but to summarize nature is slowly having less and less impact in fantasy even in an ambient quality. Obviously this isn’t a universal statement, nor a universally required thing for a story to explore and have. That there are things that do focus on and explore it, but speaking in general terms, it is a trend in the majority of media.

Which for me is a bummer as it is an aspect of writing and world building I enjoy. I really like themes of man vs nature and to have that you need to have a basic level of natural world building. Which BioWare doesn’t really explore in Dragon Age despite having elements of it - such as how regular raw lyrium is explosive, mages get sick around all lyrium unless it is diluted to a safe amount for mages, and raw lyrium straight up kills them if they’re in the same room.

So then you have questions of how do mages go/handle being underground with such a risk? Dwarves have stone sense but would mages be able to tell when they’re getting close to large lyrium deposits because they’re getting sick? Does this impact grey warden mages? Darkspawn mages?

Things that don’t get fully acknowledged or explored despite being mentioned casually in codices most people don’t read. And they don’t for a couple of reasons such as potential coding issues but also all the questions you’d have to ask:

How would you implement that as a mechanic? Would you lock mage players out of entire areas featuring raw lyrium? Would they take environmental damage if you wanted the players to explore it regardless? Would it be a mechanic only applied by in harder difficulty modes? Do you acknowledge it in banter but not in any other way? Create a way to explain why the pc mage and their mage companions aren’t dropping dead?

BioWare’s answer seems to seemingly just ignore it because it would make gameplay too challenging/punishing and likely might not be fun for a player to deal with. But they compromise by keeping the lore active in the canon through codices and low impact additions. Which is a completely okay solutions, not my preferred but I get why they do it.

When I approach this lore, I do so without expecting them to fully flesh out each nation or know which city has the most resources and the geologically rich lands in said country. Dragon Age, and BioWare in general, relies on semi-soft world building. The world was after all designed for a game. They only need to build out what they need and what hopefully won’t paint them into a corner with future installments.

Additionally, the writing style for Dragon Age doesn’t suit the hard world building that I prefer, I’m quite aware of that but also know that when it comes to talk about world building in any media, there is always the issue of people (like me) who world build for fun and consider all these small aspects but ultimately they aren’t always needed and necessary for the story a game like Dragon Age is telling.

Dragon Age is told with the intention of things being given from an unreliable narrator. Built on the concept of: there’s three sides to the truth, what x thinks happens, what y thinks happens, and then what actually happened. Which works and I love the premise.

That said, I think that it also impacts lore that shouldn’t be subjected to the unreliable narrator. Foundation or anchor lore points to be specific. Which, as we know, BioWare has always struggled with consistency in their lore, particularly with Dragon Age.

Distance is one of those foundational points that shouldn’t change, and it’s also one of those points that you don’t have to give exact travel times. You can leave it vague and stick to the official statements like the ones we have of Ferelden being the size of England (or Ireland depending on the source you use). If you’re going to be giving specifics, then I think being consistent with how long it travels to get to point a to b and not changing it multiple times in one game should be a basic expectation that is met.

Other ones the series has and is pretty consistent with is how we know Thedas has 24 hours a day, they have seasons like we expect, and are in the southern hemisphere.

Do they sometimes slip up because editing doesn’t catch they’ve made a reference that applies only to the northern hemisphere? Yeah, and that’s not bad. There are a lot of people working on the project and things slip through.

I know I have the luxury to think about Thedas in a capacity that allows for the hard world building that I like. I also know I focus on and enjoy aspects of lore that are not exactly popular for their main audience and are pretty niche.

I don’t expect BioWare to world build how I do because I’m not world building for a massive and varied audience. Not even when I do world building for my tabletop games, because I’m catering to a smaller and more specific audience.

Still I think it’s valid and worth pondering these little elements of the world building. For fun, appreciation, and to nurture one’s own creativity and understanding of media, the world, and what they think makes a believable world.

Devs might not have time to consider it but we sure do and that’s half the fun of enjoying media I think.

#dragon age #archi is musing #long post #I saw some people on my older posts while I was writing this talk about how its ‘not that deep’ and not everything needs to be explained #and like I’m aware of that lol #I’m just critiquing how logic and immersion breaking it can be to not be consistent on the fundamentals #how much I personally don’t enjoy a world built that starts crumbling if you think too hard on all the provided lore #love the game and the series but evaluating the media you consume and engage with is a good practice to have #as a creative who world builds knowing what I value and like in world building allows me to grow as one #I also think dragon age has a lot of really cool and under used elements of natural world building and while I would love to focus on that #BioWare gives the curve ball where I’m sent down a rabbit hole often because I realize it doesn’t make sense in context of the lore

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justhere4thevibez · 4 months

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annual writing self-evaluation

thank you @pipergirl17 and @erythromanc3r for tagging me!

1. List of works published this year (in no particular order):

oh gosh, I've been busy-busy this year with fanfic, so here goes!

Complete works:

... And a Hellcheer New Year

Galentines and Valentines

Hold Onto Me

Devil in the Woods

Every Time I Run, I Run to You

Eddie and Chrissy Go to a Wedding

Knocking Me Out With Those American Thighs

Cooking Up Something Sweet

Please Don't Say You Love Me

Let Me Start Over Again

You Got Me Good

Be My Breath (Through the Deep, Deep Water)

This Old Man

Do You Wanna Touch Me

My Words Will Be Your Light

She'll See I'm Not So Tough

She Knows What She Wants

Give Me a Taste

The Right Kind of Sinner

Release My Inner Fantasy

Hooked on a Feeling

Whiskey & Wine

The Graveyard Smash

Long Is the Road Out of Hell

In a Sentimental Mood

Set My Soul On Fire

Burnin' Out of Control

WIPs:

Looking For Something Dumb To Do

I Can't Get Rid of You

If You Fall, I Will Catch You

2. Work you are most proud of (and why):

hmmmmm, that's a tough one! I love them all for different reasons, but I will say I'm very proud of Long Is the Road Out of Hell because it's my longest fanfic to date (almost 60k!) and at one point I really wasn't sure if I'd be able to finish it. but I did!

3. Work you are least proud of (and why):

tbh if I'm not proud of something, I won't publish it. but I think the work that frustrated me the most was Whiskey & Wine, my kinktober fic. I pushed myself too hard with too big of a goal and burnt myself out halfway through. but I did learn the importance of setting boundaries for myself (and why I need to be careful committing to challenges 😅)

4. A favorite excerpt of your writing:

not gonna lie, once I publish something, the words tend to leave my brain, so I don't always remember what I write lol. I should probably keep a doc of good lines from my fics so I have something to present when people ask me 😂 but here are two excerpts that I'm pretty proud of.

Devil in the Woods: He had loved her since the first time he opened his eyes to find her snuggled up on his chest. He had loved her longer, since the moment he’d held her in his arms on that endlessly rainy night. And longer still, he’d loved the little girl who played jacks with him on May Day and laughed at his wild antics.

Hooked on a Feeling: He knew he could be… a lot, as kinder people said. A goddamn nuisance, according to everyone else. He didn’t mean to be, he just tended to… latch on to things. Kind of like a bulldog (but in a nice and lovable way, thank you, Jeff). And right now he had ChrissyChrissyChrissy clamped tight between his jaws, and he hoped to god she didn’t ask him to let go.

5. Share or describe a favorite comment you received:

I have a few regular commenters who give me the longest, loveliest comments where they literally analyze each chapter section by section 😭 it makes me feel so loved. but as for one individual comment, I distinctly remember a commenter from one of my early fics commenting on a really tough scene I did re: chrissy's eating disorder. they said that they also had an eating disorder, and that chapter was very healing for them. I don't think I'll ever get another comment as powerful as that.

6. A time when writing was really, really hard:

I go in and out of mild anxious/depressive episodes, mostly due to outside stressors, and that makes it really hard to write. writing is the one constant joy in my life, and when I don't even feel like doing that, I know something is very, very wrong. but luckily, they don't usually last too long!

7. A scene or character that you wrote that surprised you:

mike's redemption arc in Long Is the Road! that one was a total curveball to me, and it only came about because it was the closest place I could think of to have Chrissy walk to after her mom kicked her out. total accident, but it spawned on of my favorite sibling-ships for chrissy that I've ever written!

also writing wayne's pov! i never intended to do that, but once I started, his voice just kind of stuck in my head 😂

8. How did you grow as a writer this year:

I wrote a lot. like over 300k of fanfic. and i even got back into writing some original fiction, which I'm so excited about!

I also started writing smut for the first time in 2023, which was something I never anticipated doing, let alone enjoying! but it's been super fun

9. How do you hope to grow next year:

I'd like to work more on my original fiction, maybe get a short story published. I'd also like to get better at world-building! I tend to get so focused on the characters that I forget they exist in a place I should spend some time creating lol

10. Who was your greatest positive influence this year as a writer (could be another writer or beta or cheerleader or muse etc etc):

@slumped-in-the-arms-of-fiction all the way! she's been such a wonderful beta reader, cheerleader, and overall positive influence on my writing. I Can't Get Rid of You wouldn't ever have happened without her support and feedback!

11. Anything in your real life show up in your writing this year:

ooh, buddy! pieces of myself get sprinkled all over the damn place 😂 but as for specifics...

Galentines and Valentines opening scene was reminiscent of the girls' nights me and my college friends used to have (and still have sometimes)

Hooked on a Feeling had elements of my own past experiences of being laid up in a hospital (and being very annoyed about it)

This Old Man was absolutely inspired by my love of Columbo

You Got Me Good definitely included some of my own thoughts and feelings about when I get a little too high 😂

12. Any new wisdom you can share with other writers:

give your writing time.

it's so tempting when you have a new idea to jump on it and then get frustrated when it doesn't immediately turn out the way you want, but I've found that if I give myself time to think over a piece before I write it, and let it sit for a little while after I write it, I'm much happier with the end results!

13. Any new projects you’re looking forward to starting (or finishing) in the new year:

finishing my three WIPs! and hopefully a little christmas fic 😂 I don't have anything else immediately in the works, thank god!

14. Tag three writers/artists whose answers you’d like to read:

@1lostsoul0fishbowl @pearlypairings @rose-n-gunses and anybody else!!!

#vibez answers #annual writing self-evaluation #fic writing #writer games #dash games

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